Vampiric houses! Encroaching moss! Sleepy Time Ninjas! Overuse of Exclamations!

13 stories of... something. Much like the thoughts racing through an ADHD-fevered brain, these stories run the gamut from fun to depressing as hell and with a whiplash likely to cause hospitalization if dramatically reenacted. So please, don't do that!

Whether we're visiting robotic observer species living for the first time, or a Sleepy Time Ninja whose perfectly balanced bells and their sweet cacophony of music lull children into their dreams loses a bell creating an imbalnce in a rare all ages story of Jingle Jangles.

Possessed Waffle? We got that!

Grinding Reality TV and human meats? Sure thing!

An artist with an extreme solution to a tricky anatomical study? Yes sir/ma'am/ze/xe/whatever you be!

Best part? These suckers are short, you'll not be patiently waiting for a meandering asshole to finally get to the point.  

Hell if you're on the crapper? Your legs won't even be numb!

Praise for Christian Ducharme and Tales From The Crapper:

"Of all the books I've read, this isn't one of them!" Beverly Notaperson author of "Making My Own Title Is Hard Enough, Crap I Gotta Falsify This Too?!" and other bestsellers!

"What are you doing in my bedroom?!" Bentley Little, Probably