Date: 2014-11-23 05:00:00+00:00
Keywords: Bdsm; Romance; Erotica; Contemporary Romance; Erotic Romance; Contemporary; Adult; Dark; Epic
Description: This is the reward of the forbidden. This is the ecstasy of Enthrall. Billionaire Cameron Cole is the one in control. He makes the decisions of both pleasures and punishments. He is the ultimate master. Owner of L.A.’s preeminent BDSM clubs, Cameron has yet to relinquish the all encompassing control of his submissive, twenty-one year old Mia Lauren. Mia’s training unlocks a maelstrom of passion. A powerful connection. An unpredictable result. Her uninhibited journey intensifies by the day, but there are new complications on the horizon. A powerful rival of Cameron’s has emerged with a relentle

Enthrall Him

Enthrall Sessions

A Novel

Vanessa Fewings

FBI Anti-Piracy Warning: The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of a copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement, including infringement without monetary gain, is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to five years in federal prison and a fine of $250,000.

Advertencia Antipirateria del FBI: La reproducción o distribución no autorizada de una obra protegida por derechos de autor es ilegal. La infracción criminal de los derechos de autor, incluyendo la infracción sin lucro monetario, es investigada por el FBI y es castigable con pena de hasta cinco años en prisión federal y una multa de $250,000.

Enthrall Him

Copyright © 2014 Vanessa Fewings

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever, including Internet usage, without written permission from the author.

This story is a work of fiction. References to real people, events, establishments, organizations, or locales are intended only to provide a sense of authenticity and are used fictitiously. All other characters, and all incidents and dialogue are drawn from the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real.

Cover design by VMK

Cover photo is from Shutterstock – Photographer Phase4Studios

Book formatted and edited by Louise Bohmer:

http://www.louisebohmer.com/site/freelance/

ISBN-10: 9780991204

ISBN-13: 9780991204625

DEDICATION

for

The Owlets

CHAPTER 1

CHAPTER 2

CHAPTER 3

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 5

CHAPTER 6

CHAPTER 7

CHAPTER 8

CHAPTER 9

CHAPTER 10

CHAPTER 11

CHAPTER 12

CHAPTER 13

CHAPTER 14

CHAPTER 15

CHAPTER 16

CHAPTER 17

CHAPTER 18

CHAPTER 19

CHAPTER 20

CHAPTER 21

CHAPTER 22

CHAPTER 23

CHAPTER 24

CHAPTER 25

CHAPTER 26

CHAPTER 27

CHAPTER 28

CHAPTER 29

CHAPTER 30

CHAPTER 31

CHAPTER 32

CHAPTER 33

CHAPTER 34

CHAPTER 35

CHAPTER 36

CHAPTER 37

CHAPTER 38

CHAPTER 39

CHAPTER 40

CHAPTER 41

CHAPTER 42

CHAPTER 43

CHAPTER 44

CHAPTER 45

CHAPTER 46

CHAPTER 47

CHAPTER 48

CHAPTER 49

AUTHOR BIO

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

“Whatever causes night in our souls may leave stars.” —Victor Hugo

CHAPTER 1

I ACHED FOR him.

And yet he wasn’t that far away.

Cameron’s private plane hadn’t taken off yet, but we might as well have. My heart soared at a breathtaking altitude.

The daunting unknown.

I was a bundle of excitement and nerves mixed with a heavy dose of confusion over what had unraveled during the last two weeks, and I still tried to grasp how all of that had gotten me aboard this flight to London. This shiny wood trimming, polished chrome, and these cream leather seats highlighted we were traveling in style. My fingernails left dents in the armrests and I tried to rub them out.

I was out of my depth and it showed. My smart mouth had been silenced.

Behind Larissa’s kind smile, the pretty thirty-something air stewardess, strained an incredulous expression. She seemed to be working out why a highly respected psychiatrist and well known billionaire would dote on a girl like me. My jeans and cashmere sweater were smart enough, but my wayward blonde locks were extra unruly this morning and had me looking bedraggled. A clear reflection of what was going on inside my head.

Larissa’s frown deepened, as though she gave serious thought to my diamond studded collar. I wondered if she knew its meaning.

Soon after boarding, Cameron had knelt at my feet and eased off my pumps, encouraging me to get comfortable. His thumb caressed the hummingbird tattoo on my ankle.

He’d gone on to pour a glass of champagne before handing me the chilled flute. I willed myself not to knock it back, and hugged the small pillow he gave me.

I’d only ever flown once before, and it was from my hometown Charlotte to Los Angeles. Way back when my life had been all about survival. Somehow I’d landed on the fast track of once secretary to Richard Booth, the assistant director of a swanky kink club in Palos Verdes, and on to the heady promotion of executive assistant to Cameron Cole, director of Chrysalis.

Cameron wasn’t only my boss, though. Last night he’d staked his claim as my master, taking full ownership of this wide-eyed and starkly obvious newbie submissive. My toes curled in anticipation of what exactly that might mean.

Larissa caught my tell-tale sign of self doubt and her eyebrows arched in curiosity. Raising her chin as she handed me a napkin was a clear indication she assumed this waif like twenty-one year-old was out of her league.

With the inheritance of the Cole Tea empire looming over him, Dr. Cole was more than a renaissance man. He was one of America’s most eligible bachelors. Throw in him owning one of the grandest BDSM manors in the world and you’d merely touched on the surface of the enigma that was Cameron. He took mercurial to a whole new level, and I’d seen firsthand the way he rendered those around him speechless.

Case in point, Larissa, and I hoped she wasn’t this flustered when it came to securing the doors before take-off. If I wasn’t so affected by Cameron’s magnetism myself I’d have told him to take it down a notch.

He stood outside the cockpit, casually chatting away with the uniformed pilot. Cameron looked relaxed, like this was any ordinary day and we weren’t on our way to London. He stood there demurely, dressed in faded jeans and a sweater, inky black hair framing that handsome face and chestnut eyes crinkling into a heart-stopping smile as he looked at me—

He did crazy things to my body. Tingles circled inside my chest, making me giddy. Dizzy with anticipation, I forced myself to look away and peer out the oval window. I wondered how Richard would react when he boarded the plane.

Richard, my beautiful, broody boyfriend who I now lived with in his beachside property in Malibu. He’d given up a life of stock broking after his fiancé’s heartbreaking suicide back in New York, when his father had lorded over the city’s financial markets. His Dad’s criminal ruse had left thousands of his clients, and Richard’s family, with decimated finances. No longer one of the East Coast’s blue eyed boys, Richard had fled to Los Angeles to avoid public retaliation.

If it hadn’t been for Cameron’s psychological mastery, Richard would still be mute. Before me, Richard had frequently danced with danger by skydiving on the weekends, or swimming with sharks, or my least favorite of all three, rock climbing without a harness. All this apparently had helped quiet his mind.

I’d been presented to Richard for this very reason, to draw him out of his melancholy and away from his death defying escapades. In some ironic twist of fate, I’d ended up under the tutelage of his best friend Cameron, who’d seduced me into the very center of their playboy world.

And right onto his plane.

Cameron, the man able to change the course of history on a whim. We flew into this flame willingly. Our singed wings forced us to change direction and find the freedom our souls yearned for. Richard had handed me over to Cameron knowing I needed what only Cameron could provide. A therapy like no other.

Despite the fact Richard expected a well trained submissive back, guilt wedged firmly in my chest. I was betraying him. I was meant to be Richard’s again and moving forward into the life we’d planned.

Caressing my chest, I tried to soothe this ache uncertainty brought.

The consequences of separation from Cameron loomed ever closer.

He pulled out his iPhone. “Hey, Baxter, how are you?” Cameron leaned low and peered out through a window. “Yes, fantastic. Did catch it, yes. Great game. Look, sorry to spring this on you but I have a friend heading through terminal three. Yes. That’s right, gate thirty-one. Richard Booth. You remember Richard? Can you expedite him through? Thank you. Boeing 727. Send my regards to Deidre. How did Randall’s graduation go?” After a few minutes of catching up, along with pulling some pretty impressive strings, Cameron slid his phone back into his pocket and turned to the pilot. They resumed their conversation.

I tucked my feet beneath me, hugging myself, fearing how Richard was going to react. The last time I saw him was outside Chrysalis when he’d demanded I get out of the car. A few seconds later, Cameron had driven away with me still in it.

Taking in deep, steadying breaths, I reassured myself Cameron could handle Richard’s fury. Though after he’d stolen me away from Richard and put us up in L’Ermitage for a night, he too would have to face Richard’s temper.

I didn’t need to pinch myself to believe all this craziness was real. My fingernails were digging into my palms and keeping me focused. Despite the inevitable heartache waiting on the other side of this adventure, I tried to hold onto the best advice I’d ever been given. To live in the now. Ironically, advice given by Cameron.

It still amazed me a man so smart could also win the Mr. Eye Candy award for the twenty-first century. And that grin—

The one he wore for someone approaching the ramp.

Richard burst onto the plane, all blond locks and sun kissed skin, his smirk not reflecting the pain he had to be feeling. Surely having your girlfriend whisked off by your best friend was anger worthy? Yet Richard merely embraced Cameron, their conversation friendly, their voices low, both men at ease. Their gestures of affection were endearing.

Richard’s face lit up when he saw me.

I leaped from my chair and ran to him, burying my face against his chest.

Richard planted kiss after kiss on my forehead and eased me back “Looks like you’re going to London.” He sounded a little too happy for me.

“Yes,” I said, my excitement squished by his imminent disapproval.

“Lance did this?” Richard ran his thumb over the bruise on my lip.

I flinched at his touch. My lip hurt. “Sorry about last night. I couldn’t get away from him.”

His expression became tense. “What a mess. Forgive me. I’m an ass. I fucked up.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“It was, Mia.”

“Me punching him in the face didn’t exactly help,” said Cameron.

“I’m the one who arranged the auction,” said Richard. “I put you in danger, Mia.”

Cameron gave that sympathetic nod he always offered when one of us had messed up, that twist of his lips, that kind expression.

“Lance was too strong,” I said, haunted by last night when I’d been sold to the highest bidder.

A charity submissive auction gone awry.

Lance Merrill, a formidable member of the Chrysalis’s lion’s den, had bid a million dollars on me, despite the fact Richard was supposed to have won me. Lance had taken it all too seriously. In a sea of confusion, he’d dragged me out of the ballroom. If Cameron hadn’t saved me, I’d have been taken off to goodness knows where.

A shudder traced up my spine.

Richard cupped his face in despair, as though he too was seeing it play out in his mind’s eye.

“I don’t blame you.” I brushed a wayward lock of hair out of his face. “It all happened so fast.”

“I’ll take care of everything,” he said.

“Is Lance still angry?” I asked.

Richard looked surprised. Cameron gave a subtle shake of his head. That all too familiar silent communication. The sign of a long friendship.

“What’s going on?” I said warily.

“What is that?” Cameron stared at the makeup bag Richard held.

“Oh, yes.” Richard handed it to me. “Sorry, your toothpaste was confiscated by the TSA.”

Cameron looked incredulous. “You have a Hello Kitty makeup bag?”

Richard looked amused. “I bought her a Louis Vuitton but she still uses this one. You should have seen the looks I got carrying it.”

I unzipped it and peered in, happy to see my contraceptive pills, my comb, toothbrush, and a spare lipstick. “It’s sentimental. Bailey gave it to me for my birthday.”

“It’s adorable,” said Cameron dryly. “We’ll get you a new one in London.”

“I like this one.”

Larissa, who was enjoying our conversation a little too much, earned herself an alpha frown from Cameron. She scurried off toward the cockpit.

“Two minutes,” said Cameron. “We’re close to lining up for takeoff.” He headed off down the aisle.

I grabbed Richard’s hand. “You’re not coming with us?”

“Let’s sit.”

“Can’t Scarlet watch over Winston?” I sat beside him and grasped his hand.

“Yes, of course. She’s always up for dog sitting. But I have some business to attend to. Urgent details that have to be taken care of.”

“What kind?”

Richard’s gaze followed Cameron up the aisle.

“You’re still angry with me?” I said.

“Why would I be angry?”

“Last night. Cameron taking me away from Chrysalis.”

“I didn’t give him any choice.”

“Because of Lance? Cameron took care of it. He told Lance he was no longer a member of Chrysalis. It’s over now.”

Richard frowned and reached into his pocket. “I have your phone. But don’t turn it on.” He handed it over. “Not until Cameron gives you the go-ahead.”

“I know I can’t use it on the plane.”

“Keep it turned off for now.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I never meant for any of this to happen. Cameron training me, you falling out with him.”

“We haven’t fallen out.”

“Your argument last night? On the phone?”

“We scream at each other and the next day we’re best buddies again. Well, I scream at him. It’s how we’ve always been.” He arched a roguish brow.

Richard really did seem okay with everything.

It had all happened so fast, with me being handed over to Cameron to train, his genius at unlocking painful secrets, and all of this intensity leaving me spellbound.

Richard sat calmly, as though there was nothing unusual about his friend stealing me away again and continuing this, whatever this was.

None of it made any sense.

“Something’s wrong,” I whispered.

“Shush.” Richard caressed my face with curled fingers. “Please, relax. Enjoy your trip.”

A heaviness sat on my chest over leaving him behind.

“I want something of yours.” His fingers traced the edges of my bracelet. “This is new.” He ran his thumb over the tiny diamonds. “When did you get this?”

Richard knew. I could see it. I’d never have bought something this expensive. His eyes rose to meet mine.

“I’m not meant to take it off.”

This delicate bracelet had been given to me that first night I’d surrendered to Cameron in his Beverly Hills mansion. That evening sent me reeling in a sensuous spin of discovery.

My cheeks flushed wildly as my mind desperately tried to focus on something else.

That dimly lit bedroom. Cameron pulling me astride him. That terrible fullness morphing into blinding pleasure. Unbound ecstasy like no other. Screaming into Cameron’s palm as I came.

And came again.

Minutes later, while still lulled in an erotic daze, Cameron had placed this bracelet on my wrist. This gesture of ownership only now I understood. As though the collar wasn’t enough.

Richard fumbled at my wrist to unlock the catch.

Cameron strolled back up the aisle, his intensity proving we were against the clock. He frowned in realization as he watched Richard fumble.

Broken.

The chain rested in Richard’s palm. “I’m sorry…I…”

Cameron held out his hand. “I’ll take care of it.”

Richard tucked the bracelet into his pocket.

I caressed my wrist. “Why aren’t you going with us?”

“He’ll join us in a couple of days,” said Cameron. “You brought her phone?”

Richard took it back from me and held it up. “Shay checked it for malware. No sign of cloning.”

“Malware?” I said.

Cameron stepped forwards. “I’ll take it.”

Jeez, these guys were controlling.

Cameron tucked my phone into his jacket pocket.

Larissa appeared in a flurry. “Sir, we’re set for takeoff.”

Richard took my hands in his. “Be a good girl. Do exactly as Cameron tells you. Stay by his side at all times.” He forced a smile. “This will be fun. I’ll see you in three days, okay.”

Larissa stepped forward. “Sir, one more minute and you’re coming to London.”

Richard pulled me into a kiss, the press of his lips against mine a welcome touch, the pressure against my bruise a needful ache.

He pulled back and stared into my eyes. “I’ll make it safe for you to come home, Mia. I promise.”

CHAPTER 2

THE LOS ANGELES skyline fell away.

Gravity pushed me into my seat and I watched the land shrink as Richard’s words replayed in my mind like a nightmare I couldn’t cycle out of.

“I’ll make it safe for you to come home.”

Cameron sat to my left and I held his hand tightly.

He’d given me the window seat so I could enjoy the view. With Time magazine resting in his lap, he really did seem overly relaxed, like taking off wasn’t a terrifying experience.

I turned to him. “I’d Google cloning and malware if I was allowed to use my phone.” To get his attention, I squeezed his hand. “Safe to come home?”

“Let’s wait until we’re in the air.” He turned another page, seemingly fascinated with some high-tech wizard article.

I peered out the window. “We are.”

“Thirty thousand feet.”

I frowned at him.

“Cruising altitude. You’ll be less tense.”

“I’m not tense.”

“Squeeze my hand any tighter—” he turned the page with his left hand– “and I’ll have an open fracture.”

“Where’s the vomit bag?”

He gave a sigh and looked at me. “There’s an issue back at Chrysalis that Richard’s dealing with.”

“What has that got to do with my f-ing phone? The reason people keep their phones turned off is so they can’t be tracked.”

“I’m the only one who’s allowed to swear, remember?”

“I said f-ing.”

“You meant fucking.”

He made it sound so fricken sexy.

This power Cameron had over me was a love hate relationship that my muse disapproved of and was equally addicted to.

Larissa appeared with a tray and two glasses of ice water. “What other beverage would you like, sir?”

I took the glass from her. “Thank you.”

“Water’s fine for now,” said Cameron. “Thank you, Larissa.”

“Ma’am?” said Larissa. “How about you?”

“I’ll have another glass of champagne, please.”

“Thought you weren’t feeling well?” said Cameron.

Larissa disappeared up the aisle.

“It’s safe for her to walk around but not for you to tell me what’s going on,” I said.

“Lance Merrill,” said Cameron, “that intemperate gentleman you had the pleasure of being auctioned off to, thinks the transaction still stands.”

“But you told him—”

“As far as Lance is concerned, you still belong to him.”

“But you have all that documented evidence on him to protect me? That paperwork Dominic has to prove Lance embezzled from his clients?”

Cameron closed his magazine. “As of this morning, Lance returned the funds to a main account. He cleaned up the trail.”

“Which means?”

“Our leverage is compromised.”

Larissa carried a tray with my flute of champagne resting on it. She handed it to me.

“Thank you,” I said.

Despite it only being 11AM, it was nice to get a taste of how the elite travelled, though I’d never get used to this. I took a large gulp and bubbles burst up my nostrils.

“Fresh baked cookie?” she offered.

Cameron waved it off. “No, thank you.”

She hovered over him, and her flirty pout hinted at membership in the mile-high club. I wondered if she’d flown with Cameron before.

“We have everything we need, thank you, Larissa.” Cameron smiled up at her.

“Great,” she said. “If there’s anything else just ask, sir. Anything at all.”

“We will.” I beamed at Cameron.

Larissa’s catwalk back up the aisle was supermodel worthy.

“Play nice,” he whispered.

“She likes you.”

He looked over at me. “This is my father’s plane. Larissa works for him.”

I wondered how Cameron’s mom felt about that. Larissa wasn’t bashful, and to prove it she’d undone the top button of her blouse. With Cameron’s laser sharp perception, he too would have noticed all buttons had been neatly secured when we’d boarded. This girl was on a mission.

I snapped open my seatbelt so I could breathe better. “Where’s your plane?”

“In its hangar.”

“Why aren’t we flying on that one?”

Cameron leaned over and snapped my seatbelt together. He gave it a hard tug.

“Is Lance tracking my phone?”

“Richard’s dealing with it.”

“That’s why you’re taking me out of the country?”

“Keep your voice down, please.”

“That’s why we’re not on your plane?”

Cameron turned to me. “What did you think this was, Mia? A romantic getaway?”

My gut wrenched.

He might as well have run over my heart on takeoff. Stunned, I stared dead ahead.

This morning, Cameron had announced his ownership of me, right before driving us away from the L’Ermitage. The affection he’d showed back in the hotel had left me breathless: feeding me breakfast, making love to me in the shower, cuddling on the steps of the hotel as we waited for the valet to bring round his BMW. All of it proof he felt the same way about me.

Now he was acting like I was an annoyance.

“It doesn’t make any sense,” I muttered.

Cameron took my champagne flute from me and sipped. “Maybe I will have one. Larissa,” he called out. “I will take that drink, after all.”

Trying to read his face, trying to understand his sudden coldness, I asked, “Who is this Lance guy anyway?”

Cameron reached for his magazine. “A successful entrepreneur.”

“Am I meant to be impressed?”

“He’s influential.”

“Why does he want to open another club if he doesn’t need the money?”

“He wants another venue to entertain his predilection.”

“Which I’m not allowed to ask about?”

“Correct.”

“Go to the police.”

“Lance has political connections.”

“Wouldn’t his private activity threaten that?”

Cameron let out a sigh of frustration. “So you can only imagine how prepared he is to protect himself.”

“So this is bad?”

“Well it’s not good.”

Panic welled in my gut. “Is he coming after us?”

“Richard will persuade him. And my attorneys are working on it as well.”

“Dominic?”

Cameron looked thoughtful. “My entire legal team.”

“I thought the submissive and master contract wasn’t legally binding. It’s more like a gesture.”

Cameron scratched his forehead. “It’s a little complicated.”

“How?”

“Lance has threatened to out Richard’s whereabouts to the press if he doesn’t get you. And he’s stated in no uncertain terms he’s going to get my license to practice medicine revoked.” Cameron measured his words. “Unless I return you to him.”

“I was never his.”

“I’m afraid for those few minutes back in Chrysalis, you were his technically.” He looked over at me.

I was still holding my breath.

“He’ll cool off,” said Cameron.

“You really think Richard can persuade him?”

Cameron brought his hands together and steepled his fingers.

Was that a no? Cause that looks like a no.

Despite Larissa putting on a movie for us, I couldn’t settle. This trip to London was meant to be one of the most exciting adventures of my life. For fricken hell sake, all I wanted to do was ride on a double-decker bus.

Better still, have Cameron’s affection return.

“It’s my fault.”

“No, Mia. It’s mine.”

“Last night, in the hotel—”

“That reminds me. There’s one more issue we need to discuss.”

I turned in my seat to face him. On the small screen on the wall flashed an image of Spiderman swinging off a high rise and onto another.

“Mia, we can’t have sex ever again.”

Someone screamed at Spiderman. Something about a vendetta.

“Did you hear me, Mia?”

“I think it’s a good idea.” I focused on the screen.

And flinched as I bit my lip in the exact spot of that bruise.

“You understand why?”

I gave a nod.

“I must commit to protecting you. There can be no distractions.” He shrugged. “Besides, you’ll soon be reunited with Richard. It’s better this way for all of us.”

“I thought you took full ownership of me?” I regretted saying it when I saw his reaction.

“Fucking you is my prerogative. I choose not to.”

Then what am I to you?

“Glad that’s behind us.” He returned his attention to the magazine on his lap.

I stared at the page he was reading. An article about the Pentagon. He really did look interested in it.

I unclipped my seatbelt. “I have to go to the restroom.”

His gaze followed me as I rose.

Scurrying down the aisle, I followed the sign.

Minutes later, and after several attempts at trying to wash this distressed expression off my face, I almost looked presentable again. My reflection knew this was a lie. My tired eyes revealed the truth. I’d come into Richard’s life as well as Cameron’s and left a trail of devastation. These two men had taken on more than just a naive virgin. They’d taken on trouble. I’d put two of the most important men in my life in danger.

Cameron was right, of course. I was meant to be with Richard again, only it was Cameron who made me feel safe. Even now with this crazy business man chasing me down I had a feeling only Cameron could handle it.

Soon Richard would join us and I’d be back on track with my new life.

Richard required my complete submission. And I still grappled with the idea of daily subjugation. All my thoughts found their way back to him. The man who right now held control over me. The man who demanded my complete obedience.

I struggled with both.

The irony was I’d never felt more loved, and never had I known what it was to be cherished until I’d met these two men who couldn’t be more different. One earthy. The other an intellectual. One emotionally damaged. The other so emotionally in charge and in control at all times that everyone deferred to him.

“You’re going to London,” I told myself. “This is a dream come true.”

I wondered what we’d be doing there while we waited for Lance to cool down. I refused to let him taint my trip.

Nibbling on a fingernail, my thoughts drifted over what we’d be doing in one of the world’s most famous cities. Riding the tube, drinking in a British pub, and riding on a double-decker. Maybe Lance’s big boy tantrum had brought my adventure forward. See, there’s always an upside, my muse comforted.

Worst case scenario, we could go to the police and get them involved. They wouldn’t need to know about Chrysalis. Feeling better, I wiped mascara from beneath my eyes and rallied my courage to face Cameron.

And headed back to my seat.

Larissa was sitting in it.

Cameron offered me a polite smile. “Mia, can you give us a few minutes, please?”

Larissa fluttered her eyelids at him. Her flushed face revealed her attraction. I’d only been gone a few minutes and she’d moved in with supersonic speed. Her cleavage was on show. The flickering of long lashes indicated someone hoping to get laid.

Looking at Cameron and back to her, I tried to work out what was going on. “Sure. Of course.” I made my way back down the aisle, trying to feign I wasn’t going to need one of those emergency oxygen masks.

Hands shaking, I walked toward the back of the plane.

I was relieved to discover a bedroom. It was small, but private at least. The dark wooden headboard and fixed side table were enough to make you forget you were thousands of feet in the air.

I really hoped Cameron and Larissa weren’t going to need this bed later.

Fiddling with the back of my collar, I undid the clasp and removed it, placing it carefully on the nightstand.

I was in-between masters and I felt lost.

Slumping down on the edge of the bed, I cupped my face in my hands. This was mortifying.

For some reason, I struggled to get ahold on my life. There always seemed to be some drama unfolding and always of my own doing. This all too familiar ache burrowed into my heart. I cursed myself for opening up and becoming vulnerable.

Back at L’Ermitage, I’d seen a new side to Cameron. An affection that stole my breath along with my heart. But that tiny crack in his armor had resealed and it was as though all that intimacy, all that closeness, that gentleness, that connection had never happened.

Had I imagined it?

A knock.

I stared at the door, hoping it wasn’t Cameron asking me to give them both some alone time in here.

“Hey.” He sat next to me. “Everything’s going to be fine.”

My body ached for his arms to wrap around me.

“We’ve got this,” he said, his hand caressing my back.

“Why did Richard stay behind and not you? You’re the one who’s good at talking.”

“You would rather it be Richard here?”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Lance and Richard are old friends,” he said. “Richard invited Lance to join Chrysalis way back when. It seems like the best strategy for now.”

“Do you like her?”

Cameron frowned.

I couldn’t look at him.

“Larissa?” he said. “She’s an excellent employee. Very reliable. She dropped everything to serve our flight.”

“She was sitting in my seat.”

“I invited her to. She asked to talk to me.”

“What about?”

“There’s no attraction there. It’s you—” He ran his hand through his hair. “My focus is on you and your safety. Your needs.” He stared towards the door. “Larissa was sharing her concern for her younger brother. He’s bi-polar. He’s been taking this new prescription and his moods still aren’t leveling out. I recommended she mention this FDA newly approved drug that’s just come out of Europe to his therapist. I’ve seen firsthand its efficacy. I also gave her the name of a great professor who specializes in persistent hypomania.”

“You didn’t offer to take him on as a patient?”

“He lives in Oregon.”

“You taught me the art of observation.”

“I’m not attracted to what I can have.”

Cameron had revealed the mother of all revelations.

He smirked. “Push back. Fight back and you have my attention.”

“That’s me,” I whispered.

“It most certainly was before the sanctions,” he said, amused.

Funny how when you can’t have something you want it all the more. Like his strong hands on me, or his full lips on mine, or to feel his powerful body on top of me.

Him riding me.

He broke my gaze, and his eyes closed for a moment. “Why don’t you take a nap? All this is probably a little overwhelming.”

And last night we’d not gotten much sleep. Those tussled bed sheets back at the L’Ermitage were proof of that.

I pushed myself to my feet and swiped a stray hair out of my face. After unzipping my jeans, I eased them off.

“Do you need to undress?” His eyes swept over my body.

I threw my sweater onto the floor and pulled back the comforter. “I’ll keep my panties on.” I climbed in, unhooking my bra as I went, and flung it over the chair. Then I burrowed under the covers.

Cameron rose off the bed and headed for the door.

“I’m sorry about all this,” I said.

His hand slipped from the handle and he came back and pulled the comforter up over my shoulder.

I turned on my side, willing myself to slip into oblivion.

“This is not your fault. Far from it. ” He sat on the edge of the bed. “None of it is.”

How could I tell him that more devastating than being hunted down by a man from Chrysalis’s lion’s den was never again being touched by him? This new reality was more torturous than I’d ever imagined. His cologne did crazy things to me. His fingers caressing my scalp were meant to soothe me, but they failed miserably.

“How can I bear it,” I muttered.

“Nothing bad will happen to you. You have my word.”

I stared into his chestnut eyes, trying to convey what I dared not speak.

“Ah,” he said.

I buried my face in the pillow.

“Mia, listen to me.”

“That’s all you do. You talk. You control. You tell me what’s good for me. What about what I want?”

“Irrelevant.”

“My feelings are irrelevant?”

“I’m trying to protect you.” His expression changed to defiant. “I know what you need.”

I rolled onto my back and stared up at my only comfort.

Him.

Cameron’s expression changed. “You are petulant. Disobedient. Insolent.” He yanked back the comforter. “Take off your panties.”

A thrill washed over me.

Raising my hips, I eased off my underwear. I needed this, needed his firmness with me.

“This is your punishment for removing your collar,” he said. “Have I not instructed you on the importance of obedience? Trust?”

Covering myself with my hands, I shivered from the sudden chill of nakedness.

“Despite your continued need for training, I must proceed with wisdom. Foresight. Restraint. Do you understand?”

“No.”

“Then I will make you.”

A shudder of excitement crawled up my spine.

“Mia, you remember that first night you slept in a bed in Chrysalis? The first evening I freed your from my dungeon? The night you rebelled and trespassed into my room?”

“Yes.”

“Remember how I punished you?” He arched a brow. “Good girl. Now show me.”

With my gaze locked on his, my hand reached over my belly and my fingertip rested on my clit. “Like this,” I whispered. “You touched me like this.”

He reached over, his firm fingers resting on my labia as he eased it apart. “Show me exactly.”

I circled my finger upon that little nub, sending a shock of pleasure.

His hand lifted away. “Slower.”

I moaned.

“Obey.”

Languidly, I pleasured myself, lulled by his fierceness. His presence brought an exquisite erotic tension, the way his eyes moved up and down my body, devouring me.

My hips bucked, but his hand reached out to rest upon my belly and he lowered me. “Bring your legs up.”

Following his command, I did, feeling this relaxation wash over me, this sense of belonging, and I closed my eyes and pretended this was his finger.

“There,” he said. “Is that nice?”

“Yes.”

“Sir,” he corrected.

“Yes, sir.”

“During this trip, you will obey me at all times. Do you understand, Mia?”

“Yes, sir.”

“There will be no more disobedience.”

I gave a nod, slipping into this imminent climax.

“Do you promise to be a good girl?”

“I promise, sir.”

“It’s time to acclimate you back to your master. From now on, you will only come when granted permission. Do you understand?”

Just how Richard liked it.

My breasts rose and fell sharply. Pert nipples were desperate for his caress. My head swam with a mixture of confusion and want, and this pain in my heart was soothed only by my finger strumming faster than permitted, bringing me closer.

“I told you slower. You dare to disobey?” Cameron’s eyelids became heavy, his irises dark. “Both your hands above your head. Now.”

Thrilled with the idea his hand would replace mine, my arms flew up above my head. My wrists were held together and pinned by his strong hand.

“This is how I deal with disobedience.” His glare held mine.

Sucking my bottom lip, tingles in my chest increasing, I waited.

Cameron let my wrists go, lifted off the bed, and headed for the door. “Get some sleep.”

Pushing myself up onto my elbows, I stared at him quizzically. Desire between my thighs burned brightly.

Cameron looked severe. “Only good girls get to come.”

He left.

My head crashed down onto the pillow. I’d never survive him.

CHAPTER 3

WE LANDED AT HEATHROW Airport in the early hours of the morning.

Hand in hand, Cameron and I walked through the airport. We were escorted by an immigration officer and guided past the long line of travelers all waiting their turn to show their passports and be allowed into the country.

We ended up in a small office where an enthusiastic, if not a tired looking, officer checked our passports. He mostly made small talk with Cameron, revealing his intrigue at dealing with an American VIP. Cameron’s influence stretched over continents, apparently.

I leaned against Cameron’s arm, my hand still firmly in his grip as I only half listened to the chatter between him and the officer.

I was glad to be off that plane and stretching my legs. In usual Cameron style, he’d insisted I stay strapped in for the entire flight in case of turbulence. The only concession was Larissa’s blouse had its top button done up again and her behavior had returned to professional. It made me wonder if Cameron had said something to her.

His desire to choose my food off the in-flight menu and his monitoring of my alcohol intake were reminders he believed himself still very much in charge of me. He’d taken his time over the menu, choosing for us the lobster bisque soup, and for our entrée chicken breast with apple fig compote. To complement our meal, Cameron paired dinner with an Eden Fountain Chardonnay Medici white wine. The food was delicious, and after two bites of ice cream I was stuffed. Cameron had passed on dessert, preferring coffee.

Even now, the decadence of a fine meal still moved me. I’d never take for granted all this finery, all this luxury, and I made a point of letting Cameron know by thanking him. His frown had been hard to interpret. I had again highlighted the fact I wasn’t from his world. His attempt at suppressing a grin failed.

Back in our seats, he’d given me a mid-air foot rub, which had been enough to forgive him for leaving me wanting in that bedroom. I’d leaned back, my fingers clutching the armrests in response to the power of his fingers on the arch of my foot. He’d pampered me despite the intimacy ban.

Watching his nimble fingers move over my toes, this need for him grew, as did my rebellion. “I finished myself off and came hard.” My chin raised defiantly. “It was amazeballs.”

Cameron’s eyebrows shot up. “What kind of language is that?”

“Modern,” I said. “Looks like I know something you don’t.”

“And another kitten dies.”

“What does that mean?”

“Looks like I know something you don’t.”

I threw my head back, acting out my orgasm, pouting in ecstasy, letting out a soft moan of pleasure.

“You will be disciplined for your insolence,” he said sternly, his thumb digging into the ball of my left foot. “I’ll just have to be creative.”

I slid down the chair, lulled by this shudder and wooed by his touch.

He mouthed amazeballs like it was some grand new word, followed by a frown of disapproval.

His upper classiness really did get the better of him sometimes, yet it did have its benefits. We were through customs in minutes. The proceedings expedited with remarkable efficiency.

He tucked our passports into his coat pocket.

Upon leaving the airport, we were met by freezing cold weather and drizzle. Trevor, our chirpy English driver who met us curbside, showed surprise for our lack of luggage, but quickly moved to open the rear door of the Rolls Royce.

Judging from Cameron’s face, this was all business as usual, but I’d yet to adjust to such extraordinary luxury. The car really was a thing of beauty. Low flying planes roared above as we climbed in.

It was no surprise to find on the backseat a long woolen coat for Cameron and a belted trench coat for me.

“Do you always think of everything?” I said.

Cameron helped me with my coat and then pulled his on. “They would have been waiting for us on the plane if I did.” He rubbed his hands together. “Bloody freezing.”

The way he beamed showed he was just as happy to be here as I was.

I scooted over to his side and snuggled against him, the cold literally soaking into my bones. This was a matter of survival. His body warmth was a necessity.

Although reassured Cameron’s moodiness had lifted with his cheerfulness returning, I now had to face the new terror of the traffic coming the wrong way. And way too close. These roads we ridiculously narrow.

Trevor sat behind the wheel on the right. His initial friendly chat with Cameron revealed he’d been born and raised in London, and he went on to offer us a tour off the beaten track, should we be interested.

Cameron explained our trip was short, but thanked him anyway.

When Trevor called me Mrs. Cole, Cameron didn’t correct him. He merely became quiet and stared out the window, seemingly distracted by the endless grey tinged landscape with rain smearing the view.

As we drove into the heart of the city, I scurried over to my side, mesmerized by the mixture of old buildings and new. I buzzed down the window to clear the rain, waiting for Cameron to object, but he didn’t. I blinked up at the architecture, finding the droplets of rain refreshing. Taking everything in, all the modern structures nestled in-between the dramatic buildings, I squealed when I caught sight of my first red telephone box. A rare sight these days apparently. More giggling came when Big Ben appeared on the skyline.

Richard was meant to be here. And even though he promised to follow us, I felt the worst kind of guilt. He’d promised to bring me here from the first day we’d become a couple. For goodness sake, he was a descendant of Winston Churchill, his relatives having been born here and later emigrated to the States. He, more than us, deserved to be here.

I didn’t like the idea he’d been left behind ,and thoughts of the kind of pressure he was under with Lance wracked my soul. Here we were about to have fun, and he was left to deal with the fallout of the auction gone wrong. I knew he felt responsible. But Lance was a cruel man. I hated him for ruining everything.

“You okay, Mia?” asked Cameron.

“It’s a lot to take in.” I peered out at the River Thames and beyond that at the Houses of Parliament.

“Your body clock is messed up,” he said. “You’re jet lagged.”

“Yes.”

“Richard will be here soon,” he whispered.

I spun round to look at him.

He reached over and pulled me into a hug. “It’s my job to know.”

“You don’t mind?”

“It’s of my own making, Mia.”

Looking up at him, at his beautiful face, my guilt flipped and I feared hurting Cameron. We’d shared so much, our intimacy intense, our passion mutual, and despite his reassurance these were his wishes and we were all merely cogs in Cameron’s genius plan of him training me into the perfect sub, our connection felt deeper than ever.

I needed to see I was more than a plaything, an amusement to pass the time with.

Was Cameron even capable of love?

Richard had told me no, Cameron wasn’t, and this was the very reason he was a safe master to train with. He always kept his emotions in check. Could our prolonged eye contact, like we shared now, come from a man who didn’t care about the girl in his arms?

Cameron’s eyelids became heavy. His chestnut irises darkened with that fierce look of arousal I knew so well. His hands fisted into my scalp as he grabbed my hair, bringing my head close. The sting from his hold was only just bearable. Cameron’s lips hovered close to mine, threatening to kiss. His breath on my mouth alighted every nerve in my body.

Lifting my chin, I brought my lips closer to his, needing that which I’d been starved of.

Cameron’s expression became serene again and he brought my head down and pressed it into his chest, wrapping his arms around me in a hug. “We’ll be at the hotel soon. When London wakes, I’ll show you the city.”

“I’d like that.” I crooked my neck to better see his face. “Cameron—”

He pressed his fingertips against my lips. “Hush, now.” His other hand caressed my locks, bringing a tingling. “Relax.”

Melting against his firm chest, burying my face against him, I surrendered. His strong arms found their way around me and held me to him possessively. Even halfway across the world, I felt safe with him.

Cameron continued to make polite conversation with Trevor and was seemingly unaffected by the endless questioning about himself, such as his profession, and what state we were from, or what our plans were. Cameron made an art out of being vague. He handled it all with his usual grace and actually turned the questioning around, preferring to ask Trevor about himself and gain insight into the man who drove us.

Peering out at the well lit streets, I caught glimpses of late night party goers wandering home, or perhaps onto the next party. Christmas decorations were strewn everywhere. It really did look beautiful with all these multi-colored holiday lights.

Old buildings with their upmarket shop fronts showcased the latest fashions. Others offered up everything from luxury furniture to household appliances, and there were the occasional quaint bookstores speckled here and there. The variety of old and new was extraordinary.

London seemed very much awake, despite the hour.

We arrived at the Savoy.

For a girl used to being invisible the majority of the time, arriving at this luxury hotel amongst all the fuss of staff doting over us became a little disconcerting. Trying to suppress my awe of the place and pretend I wasn’t foreign to all this luxury, I casually took in the foyer as Cameron spoke with the concierge.

The checkered flooring reminded me of Cameron’s home. Grand marble pillars rose up along the foyer, accented by matching oak walls and low hanging lights. If perfect had a name, it would be called the Savoy.

Needing to visit the restroom, I excused myself and scurried off in the direction of the ladies, declining the embarrassment of being personally escorted by the concierge.

Within minutes of trying to avoid the mirrors, I caught a glimpse of the frail, tired and mascara smudged girl I’d become. Then I headed on out to rejoin Cameron.

He was nowhere to be seen.

A sign announcing the guest business office caught my attention. Peeking in at the continued theme of dark wood and comfortable chairs, I caught sight of the line of swanky Apple computers. Intrigue got the better of me and I hurried over. I plopped down into the seat before one of them and shook the mouse, waking the screen and going straight for the browser. I only had a minute or two, but that’s all it would take.

Quickly, I entered my code and shot off an email to Bailey. I’d never want her to worry and she deserved to know I was in London at least. And that I was safe. I sent my love to Tara.

Next I Googled Lance Merrill.

Ever filled your car up at a Merrill gas station? The New York Times article began. Why yes, I mused, and almost bit through my lip when I read on. Ironically right through the bruise Lance had given me.

Dread welled in my gut.

Lance was not merely a businessman, as Cameron had suggested, he was fricken oil barren and owned numerous refineries in Abu Dhabi.

“Jesus, he’s in bed with the Arabs.”

This rugged, salt and peppered haired forty-something tycoon was apparently one of the richest men in America, and over the last few years he’d entered politics. There were several links to interviews he’d conducted on the campaign trail. Though I had no time to watch them now. Having never had any interest in politics, I’d never seen his face before. From the images that came up, there was quite a lot to go on. Lance had a beautiful wife, with whom he’d had two beautiful daughters. According to the L.A. Times article, he was a hard-nosed Republican and firm on issues that had moral implications. He was pro-gay rights, but seriously anti-Medicare. Lance’s membership of Chrysalis’s Lion’s Den was extraordinary risqué.

“This is bad,” I whispered, glancing around to check I was still alone.

With a flick of my wrist, I deleted my search and closed the browser. Trying to put my calm face on, I made my way back to the foyer.

Cameron talked to the concierge. He tilted his head when he saw me. “Ready to go up?”

“Yes,” I said, brushing a loose strand of hair that wasn’t there out of my face.

That internet search caused a wave of dizziness.

We soon reached the seventh floor and made our way down the sweeping hallway. With a swipe of the keycard, we were in.

Lingering in the center of the lavishly decorated room, I took a minute to calm myself. All this decadence unsettled me, along with my new discovery about Lance. Cameron wasn’t telling me the entire truth.

“Bit small?” he said, trying to read me. “Sorry, Mia, but the Monet Suite was booked.” He stood behind me and eased off my coat.

“This is a house in a hotel,” I said. “It’s amazing. I’m scared to touch anything.” Which was pretty much how I felt when I’d first seen Richard’s home in Malibu, and it paled in comparison to Cameron’s palatial Beverly Hills mansion.

These men thought nothing of luxury.

“So it will do?” said an amused Cameron, as he threw his coat atop mine.

Holding back a squeal, I managed to nod.

“We could have a butler,” he said. “But I prefer the privacy. You okay with that?”

“Yes, of course. I mean, thank you. Whatever you think.”

Fearing how much all of this cost, and trying to reassure myself that tiredness had gotten the better of me, I wandered over to the window. “There’s the London Eye.” I pointed to the giant Ferris wheel at the edge of the Thames.

“Oh yeah.” Cameron joined me. “Look, you can see where Monet got his inspiration. Monet stayed here in the 1890s and painted some of his most beautiful pieces of London.”

If Cameron had intended on sucking all the feistiness out of me, then mission accomplished. I was speechless.

He looked so peaceful as he stared out, so at home, and it made me realize there was so much more to this man than I’d realized. I was seeing him in a new light. Of course, I knew he was a renaissance man, a lord of the BDSM community, but there was an introspection to him, a serenity.

“Let’s visit the Tate tomorrow.” He glanced at his watch and grinned. “I mean today.”

Despite not knowing what or where that was, I wanted to go. I truly knew the privilege of being with him.

“I’m going to take a shower.” He placed his phone on the coffee table. “Check out the wardrobe. We have a change of clothes waiting for us. Let me know if you approve.” He headed off.

I stood there stunned.

It was like I’d fallen asleep and woken up in someone else’s life.

There, in the wardrobe that was bigger than my old studio living room, was a selection of jeans, dresses, and even a long black evening gown. It made me wonder what kind of plans Cameron had for us. They were all my size. Upon the central console sat several boxes, all of different sizes, containing boots and strappy evening shoes as well a flat box that held a blue woolen hat and leather gloves. Cameron had a good selection of clothes here too. Again, a variety of casual and formal wear, and shoes to match. It made me wonder who had shopped for him. I’d have to ask.

The sound of a shower snapped me out of my awe.

Hurrying over to the writing desk, and wondering who else might have sat right where I was now, I scribbled a note of thanks to Cameron. He’d cut me off halfway through my thanking him and I needed him to know how grateful I was.

This was a life changing experience.

A ping came from the living room.

Cameron’s phone lit up and I peered at the screen and read the text.

Shay: “Call me.”

The message was from Cameron’s fencing partner, Shay Gardner. He was also a senior dominant at Chrysalis. My thoughts returned to the water room back at Chrysalis that he and Cameron had trapped me in a few days ago.

What had meant to stand for a sexy power play scene hadn’t exactly gone as planned. I’d ended up kneeing Shay in the balls and he left while still cupping his groin. Cameron had pulled me onto that soaked tile floor and punished my rebellion with a violent fuck.

God, I missed those times.

Luckily, Shay had forgiven me, and Cameron had found the entire spectacle amusing and not kicked this disobedient submissive out on her ass.

Picking up the phone, I made my way across the vastness of the suite, assuming Cameron would want to know he had a message from America.

Heat from the steam swept over me.

I took in the beauty that was a naked Cameron Cole. He was lathered and daydreaming. Amongst the mist, I caught glimpses of him working the water and suds over his body. Muscles rippled. Forearms flexed. His six pack was taut. A sculptured embodiment of perfection. His cock half erect, rising out of dark curls, showed off its enormity.

Cameron Cole was the whole package, and I envied the girl who would one day steal his heart.

His eyes met mine and he pressed his hands against the glass, staring out at me. “You like the clothes?” His gaze lowered to his phone.

“Yes, thank you,” I stuttered, edging forward and holding out his phone like it was a good idea. “Um, you got a call. I mean a text. It’s Shay.” Blushing, I looked away, preferring to admire the selection of plush white towels. “Those look soft.” I grazed my lip with my teeth.

“Put it there, please.” He gestured to the marble counter top next to the sink. “I won’t be long.”

There it was—that vortex circling me and pulling me in, that need low in my belly, this gravity that was impossible to resist. The pleasure of this man waited for me on the other side of that glass.

This desire had a place and it was called the past. I had no right to fantasize about him or wish we would be anything different than what we were now. He’d made that quite clear on the plane.

“Mia?” he said, shaking me from my trance.

Hurrying over to the counter top, I placed his phone down on it. Turning quickly and averting my gaze, I left.

Touring the suite, I tried to take my mind off the perfect vision I’d just witnessed and soothe this ache of need.

As soon as the shower was free, I’d take one. Then I’d climb into that big soft bed and get some sleep. It was as though my body knew the time here was different.

A knock at the door shook me from my daydreaming.

I stood aside to allow the young waitress in her smart black and white uniform to enter. She pushed a food trolley, and atop it sat a bottle of champagne in a cooler.

“Thank you.” I pointed to the center of the room. “Here is fine.”

She reached for the bottle. “Ma’am, shall I uncork it for you?” Her accent was soft English. Her auburn hair was gathered in an attempted bun.

“No, thank you,” I said, seeing a small card beside it.

The bathroom door handle turned.

“Hello,” said Cameron.

He’d wrapped one of those soft towels around his waist. His hair was wet, and his phone rested in his hand.

A flurry of black and white uniform left and closed the door.

He came over and lifted the bottle out of the cooler. “That was sweet of you. Let’s have it tomorrow.”

“I didn’t order it.”

“Must be complimentary.” He scratched his chin. “I’ll shave later.” He brought his phone to his ear. “Shay. How are you?”

Cameron went on to tell him our trip was going well. The flight had been fine. The room was great. He’d see him soon.

His frown deepened as he listened. “No, she hasn’t been out of my sight, Shay. Why?” Cameron’s stare fixed on me. “Hold on a second.” He took in a steadying breath. “Mia, those few seconds I left you alone in the foyer, what did you do?”

Swallowing hard, I broke his gaze.

Cameron caught sight of the small envelope and reached for it, resting his phone between his head and shoulder as he slipped the small card out.

“What does it say?” I asked.

“Shay,” snapped Cameron. “He sent champagne to our room.”

I willed my hands to stop shaking, and I needed my face to cease its burn. “Is that note from—”

“I’m looking at it. He sent a card.”

I tugged on Cameron’s sleeve. “I have to tell you something.”

His gaze fell on me. “Shay, how fast can you get here?”

Cameron stepped away and re-read the card.

“What does it say?”

“Mia, listen carefully,” he said. “Shay will be here in a few minutes. I need you to go with him. I’ll get dressed and deal with the room.”

“He’s in London?”

“Yes.”

“What about the clothes?”

“Forget the clothes.”

“I’ll pack them.” I scurried into the bedroom.

Cameron hurried behind me and whisked me up in his arms, catching me from behind and hugging me into him. “Take a deep breath. This is manageable.”

“It was too fast.” I spun round. “I only just went online.”

“The technology is lightning fast, Mia.”

“How did he know we’re in London?”

“We went through LAX.”

“But you used your dad’s plane.”

“Evidently he has an inside man with access to every itinerary.”

“You’re still using your phone? Maybe it was that?”

“Mine has CyberVape,” he said. “We didn’t have time to install it on yours. Besides, Shay planned on using your phone as a deflector.”

“But I need it.”

“I’m going to book us another room and leave it in there.” He shook his head. “That was always the plan, only I didn’t expect to use it so soon.”

“But the room is so nice.”

“Fuck the room. You’re the most important woman in my life.” He shook his head. “I promised Richard I’d protect you.”

A wave of nausea hit me. I’d never seen Cameron like this before.

“We’re in good hands,” he said. “Shay is head of security for Chrysalis and Enthrall. He’s the CEO of CloudSoul.”

“What’s that?”

“His global security company.”

“Can’t I just meet with Lance? Tell him in no uncertain terms he can fuck off.”

“As you’ve discovered, he has dubious methods and stealth access.”

“You told me he was reasonable.”

“I still believe he is.”

“Tell me the truth about him.”

Cameron lifted my chin. “This will all be resolved soon. I promise.”

“What’s written on that note? You have to tell me.”

He stared out of the window, his gaze searching for something but not finding it. “Lance just wanted us to know he sent the champagne.”

“Was it really me who alerted him?”

“You sent an email to Bailey?” Cameron curled his fingers and caressed my face. “I’m not angry.”

Gripping his hand, I felt that familiar self-hate find me again. I needed his touch, his forgiveness, his strength.

“Emailing Bailey was an innocent action, Mia.”

“I didn’t say which hotel.”

“Looks like you went on to also Google Lance? His people tracked the IP address.”

“Did he phone from America to room service?” I dreaded Lance might be here.

“He’s still in California. Richard’s meeting with him this evening.”

The ground felt uneasy beneath my feet.

“Lance isn’t that much of an idiot. He takes pleasure in other means…” Cameron caressed his forehead.

“Tell me he won’t hurt you?” I said.

“Lance knows that going after you is what hurts us.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry about. That auction should never have happened. It’s not Richard’s fault either. He had no idea Lance was waiting for the opportunity to get back at me for maintaining power over the lion’s den.”

“Let’s go to the police.”

He hugged me to his chest.

That first time I’d trespassed into Chrysalis during one of their parties held for the sexually elite, merely dressed in nothing but a bodice and a thong, Cameron had freaked when he saw me. Members of the lion’s den, all of them rich and powerful and used to getting what they wanted, had been on the prowl. Lamb to the slaughter indeed. And Cameron had rescued me before I’d bumped into any of them.

A knock at the door caused me to jolt.

“Wait here,” he said.

Still haunted by Cameron’s expression, I tried to think straight.

The door opened. Cameron invited someone in. There was something familiar about the man’s voice.

I peeked into the living room and saw the ruggedly handsome Shay Gardner standing there, Cameron’s formidable fencing opponent and an equally terrifying dominant of Chrysalis. He wore jeans and a leather jacket. His hair was more ruffled than usual.

He threw me a reassuring wave and said, “Hey there, Mia.”

These surreal seconds unfolded in a dream-like haze. Shay was meant to be back in the States. There’d been no mention of him meeting us.

Hardly catching their conversation, I was too focused on that bottle of champagne. That card.

Moving swiftly, I reached for it.

“Mia,” snapped Cameron.

Quickly, I read it, feeling all air leave the room.

“Mine.”

— L.M.

CHAPTER 4

THE CARD SLIPPED from my fingers and spiraled onto the carpet.

Lance’s threat was all too real.

My throat constricted and my mind scattered to the four corners of nothingness, trying to grasp what this meant. I really hoped Richard would get through to him.

Cameron helped me with my coat, tugging the belt tight around my waist.

“Mia, we’re changing location,” said Shay. “That’s all. No fuss.”

“Go with him,” said Cameron. “I’ll follow.”

“I’m not leaving without you,” I said.

Cameron smirked. “The Brits don’t take kindly to naked Americans wandering their streets.”

Shay grabbed my arm, his ironclad grip burning. “Cole, keep the card. We may need it later.”

“Got it,” said Cameron.

“I thought you were in America?” I said, pulling back on Shay’s grip.

He dragged me out of the suite.

I tried to wriggle away.

He looked amused. “I didn’t bring my hose, Mia.”

“Cameron!” I turned to see him standing just outside the door, his face fraught with worry.

“Wait.” Cameron came after us.

I reached back for him.

He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me towards him. “Your intuition always gives you the answers. Always. Remember that.”

Shay pulled me out of his grasp.

“Hold on tight,” Cameron called after us.

We headed fast down the hallway, ignoring the elevator and making for the stairwell, as though adrenaline was choosing for us. Taking floor after floor, rounding the stairs, my shoes clanged and my breaths echoed.

After managing several floors, we bolted back into the hallway and went for the elevator, Shay scoured left and right as we waited for it to arrive. An empty elevator greeted us and we stepped in. Shay punched the down button several times.

I tried to reason with my confusion. I hated leaving Cameron behind. I hated Lance for doing this. I was scared for Richard.

Shay’s leather jacket crinkled as he texted away. I assumed he had CyberVape on his phone too.

“Why can’t we wait for Cameron?” I asked.

“Because he’s our decoy,” said Shay. “This is what I do. You’re in good hands.”

“Where did you learn all this?” I said, marveling that the man with a kink for sexually torturing submissives had a sensible job.

“I’m ex-military,” he said. “Navy SEAL.”

“Like Leo?” I remembered Cameron saying something about his driver being ex-army.

Shay glanced up from his phone. “Leo was a marine.”

“Are you texting Cameron?”

“No, I’m checking no one tampered with our ride.” Shay texted back. “I have a sentry guarding it.”

My thoughts flashed back to Shay with Arianna, his submissive, at his feet. Him yielding the kind of power over her that only a seasoned master could. I had a vague recollection of a tattoo on his shoulder that had some kind of military insignia. The one I’d given no thought to until now.

The concierge met us when the elevator door opened. “Ms. Lauren, there’s a call for you. It’s Mr. Lance Merrill.” He pointed to the reception.

“Thank you,” I said nervously.

“Tell Mr. Merrill all calls to Dr. Cole’s room are being held until morning,” said Shay.

He pulled my body close and we headed in the opposite direction of the front door, past offices, numbered rooms, politely smiling staff, and onwards.

Upon entering the kitchen, we were hit by a burst of heat and the scent of oil and herbs. Even at this time, chefs were cooking. Passing more staff, all working at their stations, they shared looks of surprise to see the tall, fierce looking man hauling me alongside him.

“Can I help you, sir?” asked a young chef.

“Restroom?” Shay blurted, rounding the central aisle.

“He means the loo,” offered one of the other workers.

Dodging a man carrying a silver platter of cheese, we hurried out, trekking onward down more endless hallways.

Outside, the coldness hit me.

I blinked into the dawn.

“Ever been on a motorbike before?” asked Shay, pulling me towards the curb where a sleek black bike with the Ducati insignia on the side was parked.

“No, never,” I said, and tried to escape his grip. “My dad…”

I’d lived in fear of them since one had supposedly taken my dad’s life. Head spinning, my heart stuck in my throat, I talked myself down from this edge of panic. My dad was still very much alive and that bike accident had been a lie.

“I can’t,” I said.

“Yes you can, and you will.”

Shay grabbed one of two helmets off the back of the bike and squished the headgear on me.

Cameron’s words “hold on tight,” reverberated in my skull.

“It’s easy,” said Shay. “Just wrap your arms around my waist and move your body with mine.”

I watched him pull his on helmet. “Why can’t we go in a car?”

“Because this is how we roll, baby.” He glanced down the road. “Time to lose the fuckers.”

Climbing behind Shay, sitting a little higher than him, I leaned forwards and wrapped my arms around his waist and squeezed my thighs on either side of his, hoping he wouldn’t complain about my death grip. He kicked the bike off its stand, righted it, and revved the engine. A deep throttled vibration spread between my thighs.

A roar of the engine. A tug backwards as we sped off.

I leaned in, hugging Shay, holding on even tighter, the whooshing of the world going by.

We were on the wrong side of the road.

No, my addled brain screamed at me, remember, this is another weird quirk of this country. They drive on the damn left.

We rode fast. Zigzagging.

The thrum of the engine reverberated through my body. I leaned left and then right, and the buildings on either side were a blur. Shay navigated the thin streets while dodging cars, taxis, and a few pedestrians, and despite being on the other side of the road he handled the bike with ease.

We stopped to take a few seconds break beneath a deserted bridge where Shay checked on me. Despite my hands feeling the cold, I was actually holding up. I missed Cameron terribly, but Shay assured me we’d be seeing him again soon.

With him confident he wasn’t going to lose his passenger, we took off. The helmet kept my ears warm, and I peered through the visor, taking in the passing scenery.

This eclectic city was awakening.

Shay parked the bike just off Waterloo Station. We brought our helmets with us as we raced up a grand stairwell toward a building with The Royal British Officer’s Club carved above the stone arched doorway.

We were met by a young man dressed in a blazer, beige pants, and a scarf. He introduced himself to me as Ned. The way he greeted Shay proved they were old friends reuniting, and Ned’s short haircut gave away his connection to the military. I’d only been in this city a few hours and already the accents were familiar; his sounded refined.

Ned furtively looked behind us, hinting at his awareness of our evasiveness. He guided us swiftly through the building, which at this time of morning was deserted, and we passed framed photos of grand looking officers. Farther down, there were black and white pictures taken of soldiers during the first and second World Wars, and I wished there was more time to study them.

The elevator took us high.

The hallway, with its grey and red carpet, sprawled before us, and the faintest scent of stale cigarette smoke rose from beneath a doorway.

Ned and Shay chatted outside our room while I checked it out.

It was nothing like the Savoy. Basic everything and small. There were two beds separated and a bedside table in the middle, where I placed my helmet. Another door led off to a bathroom.

I investigated it. A quick glance at the electrical outlets that wouldn’t take any of my American appliances reminded me I was in a foreign land. Not that I had any of them here. Despite speaking the same language, all these differences were unsettling.

I shoved this fear down.

Shay rejoined me. “We’ll be safe here.”

“Is Cameron meeting us?” I asked.

“Soon. This is only for one night.” He removed his jacket and threw it on the bed. He picked up a bottle of water from the corner table. “Want one?”

I plopped down onto the opposite, overly firm bed. “No, thank you.”

“Ned’s ex-SAS.” He took a sip. “So we’re in good hands. We’re registered under his name.”

“SAS?”

“British special forces. Bad ass.”

“Were we followed?” I asked.

“Not for long.”

My shoulders slumped. “Why do I have a feeling you’re keeping something back?”

“You’re tired.” He sat on the bed opposite. “Get some sleep. I’ll take this one.” He patted the bed’s firmness and smirked. “By morning, you’ll be an honoree SEAL. This is hardcore.”

I giggled and then remembered why we were here. “I messed up.”

Shay lay on the bed and stretched his long legs out, with his boots still on. “No you didn’t.”

“I’ve never heard of anything like this,” I said. “I’m out of my depth.”

“Once you enter this world, you see the influence money has. I’m like you, Mia. I come from a very humble background. The military paid for my education in software engineering. And I repaid their kindness by giving them six years of my life in the Middle East.”

“Do you regret it?”

“Hell no.”

My thoughts flashed back to Shay directing that hose on me in the white tiled room. He’d used that water pressure to punish me every time I failed to respond to Cameron’s commands quick enough. An erotic scene of subservience back at Chrysalis that I’d failed at miserably, yet won out anyway. Cameron had found my rebellion endearing, apparently.

“Had I known you had special skills,” I said, “I would never have attacked you in the water room.”

“Shows what I know about human nature,” he said with a cheeky grin. “I thought you were coming over to kiss me.”

“You could have stopped me.” I laughed. “You’re strong.”

“That room is actually about you discovering your power, Mia.”

I leaned up. “How exactly?”

“Had I touched you, I’d have compromised your power. I tried to dodge your knee, but I wasn’t fast enough.”

“You let me attack you?”

“I moved away. I’m not a total masochist.”

“How did you meet your submissive, Arianna?”

He grinned. “It was the day of my interview at Chrysalis. Cameron was called away to work and left halfway through my interview. Looking back, it was probably staged.”

“Why do say that?”

“He invited me to tour Chrysalis. I took him up on his offer.”

“He let you wander off alone?”

Shay arched a brow. “It was a test.”

“To see how you felt about the lifestyle?”

“To see if I told anyone afterward.”

“How would he know?”

“He’d have known,” said Shay. “Halfway down the east hallway and there she was, Arianna, handcuffed to the top of an alcove, conveniently naked, and just my type. Fuck me if she wasn’t the most incredible woman I’d ever seen. She had ink that made her body look like a piece of art. The first words out of her mouth were, “What the fuck are you staring at?”

“What did you say to her?”

“Considering this was my first time visiting a club of this sort, I handled her pretty well.”

I sat up, riveted.

“I recited a poem to her.” Shay stared off. “Arianna lowered her head in a bow. Didn’t say another word.” He looked over at me. “My cock had never been so hard. All I wanted to do was take her.”

“Did you?”

“Not that day, but the following week when I relayed the story to Cameron he gifted her to me.” Shay chuckled. “Bastard had my balls in a psychological vice. All I could think about was that vision of her strung up. I was too far gone not to accept the job. Arianna was my first sub. Cameron taught me everything I needed to know so I could handle such a live wire. The rest is history. I’ve been a loyal employee ever since, and Arianna and I have been together five years.”

“You fell into the lifestyle.”

“Arianna is the lifestyle.”

“And she doesn’t mind you having an open relationship?” I asked.

After all, I’d witnessed him in a threesome that first time I’d toured Chrysalis’s secret rooms with Cameron. That ménage a trois Shay had starred in left me breathless.

Shay lowered his eyelids. “We’re both bi, so we’re a good fit.”

“What was it like being bi in the military?”

“No one knew.”

I remembered Cameron telling me they’d first met in Surrey. “Was Cameron playing polo too the first time you met?”

“He was playing polo that day, yes.” Shay looked over at me. “We knew each other before that.”

I frowned at him.

“We met in Afghanistan.”

I wondered why Cameron had told a white lie. “Why was he in Afghanistan?”

Shay snapped his head round to look at me. “Looks like you two don’t do much talking.”

“We talk,” I said. “He’s just reluctant to open up.”

“I’ll let Cole tell you. I am, after all, head of his security.”

“Was Cameron a Navy SEAL?”

Shay looked amused. “Nice try, Mia.”

I lay down and rolled onto my side to look at him, resting my head on my palm. “He doesn’t strike me as the kind of man to wear a uniform.”

“Oh, and what kind of man is that?”

“You know, like you, rugged and…” This was not going well and I cursed myself for starting this.

“And?”

“I can’t ever see Cameron shaving his head.”

He burst out laughing. “He does have a knack for always looking suave. Even with bullets flying over his head he didn’t have a hair out of place.”

“Was he a SEAL?”

“Civilian consultant,” he said. “Cole possesses the kind of smart that generals seek out when every other plan fails.”

As if Cameron couldn’t be more superhero material.

My eyes widened. “They flew him out there to help with the war?”

“My team was on a rescue mission,” he said. “The prisoner possessed vital intel that we needed upon his extraction.”

“Did you get your guy out?”

“We did.”

“And Cameron got the intel you needed?”

“No more questions, missy. The details are classified.”

I had a new mission of my own: to get Cameron to open up about his foreign adventures with Shay. There were always layers of Cameron yet to be peeled away, and I had a feeling it would take years to get to his core. Time was running out and I knew I’d never get the chance to be that close to him again.

I wondered where he was now. What he was doing. Who he was with.

He also owned a club in London. I remembered him telling me that during my first weeks at Enthrall. Perhaps he’d gone to pay the place a visit. Check up on his elite society of gorgeous Brits who lived on the edge. Push the boundaries of pain and pleasure.

My teeth embedded in my jealous mouth.

Maybe right now he was surrounded by willing subs all seeking him out as the master extraordinaire. He was, after all, a free agent.

Shay snapped me from my melancholy. “Cameron offered me a job while we were in Afghanistan. He knew I was bi. He has a knack for reading people.”

“But he’s not bi?”

“Tell me about it,” said Shay.

“Pity he didn’t read Lance.”

“He did.”

“Do you like working for him?”

“Cole’s an awesome boss. He’s loyal to a fault. He pays well. Feeds us. Protects us. Gets us on the best medical plans. And he’s always there for us.”

“He must have one fault,” I said. “He can’t be this perfect.”

“He does Mia, but if you can’t see it, I’m not going to be the one to point it out.”

I raised myself onto my elbow. “What do you mean?”

He stared at me, his frown deepening. “He has an Achilles heel and Lance knows what it is.”

“I wish Lance would find another way to make a point.”

Shay scoffed.

“I try to be a good submissive. It’s hard sometimes. My mouth runs off and the next thing I know I’m getting spanked.” My cheeks flushed.

Shay waved his hand. “Let’s not go there.”

“Am I really in danger?”

He looked at me through lowered lashes. “What Lance wants Lance gets.”

“If he comes after me, isn’t it kidnapping?”

“Merrill’s manipulative. He’ll convince you there’s no other way but his. We’re going to keep you safe until we can get through to him. Or come up with a superior plan to his.”

“Do you think Richard’s safe?”

“Sure. As long as he keeps his cool.”

Richard could be a hot head, and it made me wonder if he was the best choice to negotiate with Lance.

“This is about power, Mia.”

“I feel so powerless.” And I missed Cameron so much.

“Don’t underestimate Cole’s power,” said Shay. “He’s mentally superior and easily more psychologically agile, and way more connected than Lance. He’s equal to him on all fronts and a lot more dangerous.”

“How is Cameron dangerous?”

“You’ve not seen him go to war before have you?”

“No. Never.”

Shay grinned up at the ceiling. “Cameron’s the equivalent of a drone strike. You won’t see him coming and you won’t survive him.”

“He’s not going to kill him?” I said. “Tell me he won’t.”

Shay lay back onto the bed. “There’s a bathroom through there. You go first.”

“Shay?”

He pushed himself up onto his elbows. “No, but he’s quite capable of publically eviscerating his enemies. Trust me, after he’s finished with him, Lance will wish he were dead.”

CHAPTER 5

HER BEAUTIFUL FACE stared back.

The painting was so realistic it felt like the young woman was holding my gaze. Reading the gallery’s summary, she had lived a remarkable life, becoming a muse for the artist who painted her and the lover of a wealthy aristocrat who’d warmly accepted her illegitimate child. Her realism was hypnotic.

Breaking from this trance, I realized Shay had wandered off. He too was probably distracted by one of the other paintings here in the Tate Modern.

The place was amazing, and even had paintings by William Blake. I may have been a troglodyte when it came to art, but I knew who he was. It took all my will not to touch the canvas and get us thrown out. Shay and I had taken our time to admire each of Blake’s paintings. Apparently Shay also knew a thing or two about art.

“Time with Cameron rubs off,” he’d told me.

I missed Cameron, and Shay’s unwillingness to share what the plan was caused waves of uncertainty. I wanted to let both Cameron and Shay see I was able to cope with whatever was thrown at me. Not cause them more concern, or to doubt my ability to endure this problem I’d essentially created.

Last night I’d fallen asleep in that pokey room in the officer’s club, feeling safe with Shay sleeping in the bed beside mine. I’d enjoyed getting to know him. I could see why Cameron had hired him and now counted Shay as one of his closest friends. Shay’s earthiness, his sense of adventure, and his patience were contagious.

This morning, Ned had delivered coffee and bagels with cheese and cucumber to our room in true British hospitality. To my relief, he’d also bought a small suitcase containing fresh underwear, jeans, a blue satin blouse, and Ugg boots.

Cameron had thought of everything. There, tucked inside the case, was my Hello Kitty makeup bag, and inside it my contraceptive pills. I breathed a sigh of relief when I popped a tablet and took a sip of fresh roasted coffee to wash it down.

After a shower, a tussle of my hair with my comb, a flick of mascara and a dab of lipstick, I started to feel a little better.

Ned had driven Shay and I here to the Tate Modern in his Rover, with me sitting in the back staring out at the view and Shay in the passenger seat chatting about everything from politics to old military life. There was no mention of our current drama.

How quickly a life can spiral. I felt deserted and lost.

That pretty girl in the painting must have lived so simply. No technology, no one hunting her down, her serene expression revealing the kind of peace I coveted.

The shores of Malibu seemed so far away.

“Do you know why the subject in the painting makes eye contact with you?” His voice was deep and cultured.

Cameron stood behind me.

Tingles in my chest spiraled as I continued to stare at the painting.

“The artist is enticing you into their world,” he said.

Silence lingered.

“Mia,” he whispered.

Shay’s words found me again. Something about Cameron being the equivalent to a drone strike you’d never survive.

Or ever see coming.

Braving to turn, I blinked up at him, letting out a sigh of relief. Cameron was dressed in a suit and waistcoat, the cut pure perfection, as was his ruffled hair. He oozed European sophistication. That five o’clock shadow revealed he’d not shaved since I’d left him last night.

His warm chestnut gaze held mine.

I wanted to ask him where he’d been. Why he’d left me alone with Shay.

His fiery eyes revealed so little. An expression he held when around me--stern, controlling.

“Have you seen enough?” he said.

“Yes, thank you.” Scanning the room for Shay, I didn’t see him.

Gathering my thoughts, I braved what came next. This great unknown. This vast city full of old buildings and new. Strangers rushing by. Tourists looking as equally awed. Though not as lost.

Cameron led me out of the gallery.

We reached the fancy car waiting for us at the curbside.

Shay was actually out there, standing beside the car. He opened the back door and ushered me in. “First time in a Rolls Royce Ghost, I take it?” He’d read my stunned expression.

I ducked inside, feeling the usual awkwardness and hoping Cameron’s severity would lessen. Cameron slid to the other side and the door shut behind him. He settled across from me on the soft leather seat and focused on something outside the window, ignoring me.

The car pulled away from the curb.

The divider window slid up to shield us from the driver and Shay. I was glad he was coming with us. I was also grateful for the privacy.

Tucked in the other corner, I tried to read Cameron’s face. “I promise to be good.”

Cameron’s jaw tightened. “I wish I could promise you the same, Mia.”

My breath stilted as his expression changed to severe. His hands clenched and relaxed.

He came at me with lightning speed. Then his lips were on mine, and his fierce kiss forced me back into the headrest. His hands cupped either side of my face to hold me in a passionate embrace. So wild, so unforgiving, I forgot what it was to breathe.

His stubble created a delicious scratch across my face, and his tongue punished mine. I pushed back, angry with him for sending me away, bitter from his threat to never touch me again.

This was passion. This was retaliation for what he’d put me through. A wave of all consuming want rolled over me. My fingers curled in his hair, holding him against me, kissing him back just as fiercely.

He pulled away, and that dark gaze burned through me. “You drive a sword through my heart.”

“Cameron—”

“Address me as sir.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Then I’ll make you.” Cameron yanked at my coat, pulling it off my shoulders and dragging my arms out, his strength overcoming mine. He ripped off my boots one by one and flung me back along the seat.

I was like a ragdoll in his arms.

He gripped my wrists together, capturing them behind my back, and he dragged me astride him, so my thighs straddled his. “I’m going to fuck you hard, Mia. It’s what I need and it’s what you deserve.”

“Yes, sir.”

His speed was ferocious, controlling, his undressing of me a frenzy of overwhelming power. Stripping me, he threw my clothes here and there, not caring where they fell. My bra flew and my panties followed.

He remained dressed in a blatant show of power.

I didn’t care.

Needing him inside me more than oxygen in my lungs, I weakened. His cologne provoked a wave of panic that he was going to burn me up. This was too much; a man wildly tearing at my clothes, out of control, and not the Cameron I knew.

I leaned into his shoulder and sank my teeth into hard muscle.

Cameron stilled and his cock grew harder against my stomach. My attack fed his kink.

I flew into a panic again.

He grabbled to control my flailing limbs, then raised my hands above my head. His voice found me in the madness. “Do you deserve to be fucked hard?”

His erection between my thighs drove me wild, and his hold on my wrists tightened.

“Answer me.” he said.

“Yes, sir.” I suckled where I’d bitten him, while easing my legs wider apart and surrendering.

“Mia,” he said, his left hand gripping my wrists together above my head, his right reaching low between my thighs. His fingers explored, caressed.

“Yes, sir,” I said, breathlessly. “Thank you, sir.”

He eased himself down my body. His head now rested between my thighs, and his mouth traced my inner thigh.

“Oh God,” he murmured, his tongue circling my clit, flicking slowly. “This must be the last time, Mia.” His tongue speared into me. A frenzied fucking made me a writhing mess.

Arching my back, I let out a long, wanton moan, not caring if I was heard.

He reached for his zipper, freeing himself. Then he slipped on a condom before rising above me. “He’ll understand.”

Cameron’s full length thrust into me, stretching me wide, forcing my complete surrender. Shuddering, small gasps escaped me. The pressure of him against me caused a rush of arousal; my sighs filled the car.

“Evidently, this is the only way to control you,” he seethed, rocking above me.

His words carried the weight of truth. With him close, I was safe, even from myself. That thought caused my breasts to swell and I cupped them to soothe the pang of pleasure.

His hands swept mine away, catching my taut buds between each finger and thumb, squeezing them and sending me over.

“Can I come, sir?” I cried out.

“I forbid you to come without my permission.” His hips pounded me into the seat.

It was too late for me. My shuddering revealed I was already gone. Unable to hold back on his order, my fingernails dug into his back, and I scratched my way through my orgasm.

Cameron’s hand slammed over my mouth to silence my scream. His lips clamped down on my left nipple, grazing the sensitive skin with his teeth then suckling.

He jerked as he came into me, and his hips rode out his pleasure.

My head crashed down onto the seat and, finally, I remembered to breathe again.

“You defied me?” He nuzzled into my neck, burying his face in my hair. His kisses to my throat were tender.

“Sorry, sir.”

“Why do you insist on giving me another reason to fuck you, Mia?”

Hugging his body with all the strength I could muster, I whispered, “Because I’m yours to discipline, sir.”

He stared into my eyes, his boyish smile dissolving his frown. “If that were true, the world would be perfect.”

Cameron dressed me, though it took a little longer than it had done to strip me of my clothes. Breathless and shaken from his passionate attack, I tried to read his expression that went from serious to contentment breaking through.

He peered at me from under dark lashes. “You have the kind of beauty that takes down kingdoms.”

After feeling a little awkward and abandoned all morning, I held onto those words.

He tucked himself away, straightened his suit, and slipped to the other side of the car as though nothing had happened, crossing a leg over another as he stared out at the passing view.

My arms felt empty again, and despite the relief his affection had returned, I could almost feel the cold coming off the glacier that was Cameron Cole right now.

R & B played softly from the speakers, and it leant a sultry mood to our post fucked silence.

The passing scenery was hypnotic.

“I analyzed my way into this,” he said softly to himself. “I can analyze my way out.”

“I’m sure it will be fine,” I said, fiddling with my top button, which was done up wrong. “Richard’s very persuasive.”

Cameron’s frown deepened.

“Are you all right?” I said. “You seem a little more…”

“More?”

“Mercurial.”

“I’m thinking, Mia. This is me thinking. You should try it sometime. It’s rather useful.”

I slumped into the seat.

He held out his hands to me. “Come here.”

Gliding over to his side, I slid into his arms and lay my head against his chest. His heart was beating fast, his warmth was welcome, his scent was pure Cameron. Pure alpha male. Pure master.

Letting out the softest sigh, I snuggled into him.

We drove like that for a long time, me hugging him and Cameron merely staring out the window. I knew he had a lot on his mind and the last thing I wanted was to make things worse.

The car stopped.

We’d parked outside a large townhouse with white painted walls and a black iron gate surrounding us.

“Who lives here?” I said.

“A man who has a knack for answers.”

That iron fence looked menacing. I wondered if it was used to keep people out or keep people in.

Cameron stared at the towering property. “Stephen sees through one’s psyche like glass. He taught me everything I know. Prepare yourself, Mia. You’re about to be meet one of Britain’s most gifted psychoanalysts.”

My uneasiness welled.

“I need Stephen to analyze you.”

My breath stuck in my throat.

“I have to know why,” he said softly.

CHAPTER 6

Dr. STEPHEN FINLEY stood on the steps of his house and stared over Cameron’s shoulder, watching Shay head back down the pathway.

And I studied Stephen Finley.

He was tall, in his fifties, and handsome in an interesting way. Plump, well dressed, and looked ever so English with his out of control mop of brown hair, his sideburns grey. His glasses balanced on his nose as he peered over them and locked onto Shay.

Shay threw us a wave and got back into the Rolls.

The Rolls pulled away.

Only then did Dr. Finley turn back to Cameron. “Interesting,” he said, his accent upper class.

Cameron gave a smirk.

“Oh where to begin,” said Dr. Finley.

“He’s one of my best men,” said Cameron.

“The kind of loyalty the military instill,” said Dr. Finley. “Short haircut. Polished shoes. Lack of arrogance in his expression. Navy?” He lowered his gaze, following the car as it disappeared from view. “Drawn to more elegant sports?”

“Ex-Navy SEAL.” Cameron smirked. “Fencing partner.”

Dr. Finley turned to me. “This is Mia?”

I held out my hand and shook his firmly, wondering what he’d see in me. “Mia Lauren.”

“Call me Stephen.” He gestured for us to go inside.

We headed down the hallway and through to the sitting room.

This was my first experience of an English home and it was just as I’d envisioned it. A golden Labrador came bounding along to greet us and I knelt to pat the beautiful dog, kissing his head when he leapt onto my lap. His fur smelt homey and I relaxed, soaking up his affection and tickling him under his chin.

“Ah,” said Stephen, looking down at us. “There you have it. Bronte likes you. Our work is done.”

I sat where Stephen showed me to, on the big plush cream couch, and pushed myself back. Bronte jumped up and sat beside me so I could continue to pet him.

There were several armchairs on either side and an old table stacked high with files. In the corner rested an antique writing desk with one of those pull out panels to write on. Wall to wall were neatly lined books on well organized shelves, and quite a few scattered knickknacks collected from aboard.

I jumped up, wanting to take a closer look. Bronte remained on the couch, as though knowing I’d soon return. Three small ornamental pyramids were perfectly positioned close to one another on the middle shelf.

Farther along, I couldn’t resist examining the piece of cement brick next to them. “What’s this?”

“Piece of the Berlin wall,” said Stephen. “A patient brought it back. He’d been working undercover with the British military in Berlin when the wall came down in 1989.” He lowered his gaze. “Before you were born.” He looked over at Cameron and arched a bushy brow.

“I know,” said Cameron.

Stephen’s focus centered on me. “This one’s easy. Dr. Cole, you’ve gotten your patient pregnant.”

“I’m not pregnant,” I said, placing the piece of wall down. “I’m on the pill and he uses a condom.”

Cameron rolled his eyes.

I frowned, realizing that Stephen had just used Cameron’s trick to get me to burst out the truth.

“Tea?” said Stephen.

I sat on the couch and waited alone while Stephen and Cameron went off into the kitchen. I patted Bronte, looking around again in my interest to learn more about this renowned therapist. This was actually kind of fun.

Everything was neatly organized. There was no hint of a woman’s touch. The masculine flair, from the cream blind covered windows to the muted creams and beiges with some dark browns, made me wonder if he was either divorced or gay.

Within minutes, Stephen and Cameron reappeared with a tray of tea.

Cameron held out a china plate to me. “Jaffa Cake?” He offered me a round chocolate cookie.

“Yes please.” I took a bite out of the orange and chocolate flavored biscuit. It tasted amazing.

Cameron took one himself. “Don’t let me eat them all,” he said. “These things are addictive.”

Stephen sat opposite in one of the plush armchairs and Cameron joined me on the sofa, sitting at the other end as though needing some distance from me. Considering what we’d just gotten up to in the Rolls, it was a little awkward.

“How do you two know each other?” I asked.

“Stephen was my professor at Harvard,” said Cameron.

“Cameron was my best student. Though a little controversial for some, his techniques garner lasting results.”

I reached over and hugged one of the small pillows.

Stephen’s focus settled on me and I glanced down at my shoes, wondering what he’d get from those. “No sign of a military background there,” I said dryly.

“You’re Cameron’s best friend’s girlfriend?” said Stephen.

Staring at him in awe, I wondered how he knew.

“Cameron told me all about it on the phone, Mia.” He tilted his head. “Sounds a little complicated.”

“He has Richard’s permission to have sex with me,” I said. “Does he know about your place in L.A?” I asked Cameron.

He gave a nod. “Stephen’s well aware of Chrysalis. We’ve talked at length about what we do at the manor.”

“Cameron’s training me for Richard. Making me a better sub,” I hesitated and then added, “Sub is short for—”

“Submissive,” said Stephen. “And how is your training going?”

“Great. Kind of.”

His gaze stayed on me for the longest time. “The human heart is a fragile gem. A delicate flower must be eased from the earth.”

“A pleasure like no other,” said Cameron wistfully.

Stephen nodded. “But when the bud finally opens that which was once kept hidden reveals itself.”

“I admit to my surprise at these unexpected results,” said Cameron.

“Pleasing?” asked Stephen.

“Oh yes. Annoyingly so.”

“The secret way of the heart,” said Stephen. “Finding a way around what was previously denied it.” He peered over his glasses at Cameron. “Amare.”

“Never part of my operandi,” said Cameron. “Look, the reason I’m here is to better comprehend my subject’s effect.”

“Clearly, your patient has gotten the better of you.”

“I’m not his patient,” I piped up.

“What are you to him then?” said Stephen.

“Aren’t you meant to build trust first?” I said. “Ask about the weather in L.A? Make me feel more comfortable about opening up?”

Stephen poured tea into three cups and added milk. He handed us each a cup. “How’s the weather in L.A? Let me take a wild guess. Sunny?”

Cameron looked amused and opened his palms in a gesture of defeat.

“Your match?” said Stephen.

Cameron gave a nod. “An unlikely candidate, but challenging nevertheless.”

“There are risks with your chosen lifestyle, my boy,” said Stephen.

“I handle them.”

“And how do you find the lifestyle, Mia?” asked Stephen.

“I like it. Cameron used BDSM to unlock this memory that was wrong.”

“How so?”

“Well, I had this memory of injecting myself with cocaine when I was fourteen, and all along it was my mom’s drug dealer who injected me. The Ambien my mom slipped into my sandwich just before, to make me go quiet so she could get her next hit, made me forget. Cameron—” I lowered my head– “Dr. Cole did some research back in my hometown and put all the pieces of the puzzle together. He then told me what really happened and it unblocked the memory for me. Now I know the truth, I’m liberated.”

“And there you have it,” said Stephen. “In a bitter nutshell.”

“Dr. Finely has a PHD in philosophy,” said Cameron.

Stephen eyed me for the longest time. “Sugar?”

“Excuse me?”

“Do you have sugar in your tea?”

“No, thank you.”

“Southern Belle.” Stephen raised a finger. “Charlotte.”

“Well travelled too,” added Cameron.

“I’m not ashamed of what we do,” I said. “BDSM makes me happy.”

“The pain from being whipped releases endorphins,” said Stephen. “There’s clinical data to support the findings of its efficacy for treating alcoholics.”

“I’m not an addict,” I said. “I just like the way Cameron makes love to me. I mean fucks me.”

Cameron pinched the bridge of his nose.

Stephen grinned. “An easy obsession.”

Cameron put his teacup down. “She’s totally ridiculous.”

Swallowing hard, I tried to ignore that.

“This is the issue, apparently,” said Stephen. “It’s evidently time to give the ridiculous specimen back.”

Cameron offered a sympathetic smile my way. “Mia, when I say ridiculous, what I’m trying to express is your….” Cameron sat back, as though lost for words.

“Cole, how old were you when you went to boarding school?” asked Stephen.

“What has that got to do with anything?”

“You understand the relevance.”

“Five,” said Cameron. “I was five years old.”

“Five?” I said. “That’s very young.”

Cameron looked defensive. “Stephen, you knew this.”

“But Mia didn’t.” Stephen nodded.

“How is this relevant?” said Cameron.

“During our sessions, you revealed just how relevant.” Stephen gave him a knowing look. “Your subconscious desires normalcy. I suggest you date.”

Cameron looked horrified. “Out of the question.”

“Why?” said Stephen.

“She’s not mine to date.”

“And?”

“Richard would never survive it,” said Cameron. “This is non-negotiable.”

“That’s very presumptive of you,” said Stephen. “I’ve met Richard. He’s very reasonable.”

“This is irrelevant,” said Cameron. “I just need you to help me understand why now.” He pointed at me. “I’ve analyzed this a million times. She’s not my Anima. I’m sure of it. I’m responsible for my own archetype…”

I really needed more tea. These cups were too small.

Cameron and Stephen continued their conversation. I listened, all the while patting Bronte, trying to catch a word or phrase I might understand.

“Tell me about your latest dream?” said Stephen.

“Irrelevant,” said Cameron. “I’ve not been entering REM sleep lately.”

“I see.”

“I’m too close to the subject to be objective,” said Cameron.

Subject?

“Mia.” Stephen looked over at me. “Why don’t you take Bronte into the garden?”

“I like listening,” I said, still mesmerized by Stephen’s revelation that every man had female genes, and therefore a female side. Apparently I was probably Cameron’s ideal that he’d dreamt up from within his own psyche. A living breathing fantasy. As though Cameron had imagined his perfect woman and I’d conveniently turned up.

Only he’d given me to his best friend.

There was no doubt I loved Richard, but all this time spent with Cameron had confused my heart.

Cameron paced, seemingly just as conflicted.

“The greatest gift of all is to give that which we love the most to another,” said Stephen.

Cameron stared at him for the longest time. “How do I sever this?”

“Face the inevitable.”

“She is so inconvenient.” Cameron pointed to me. “Why her?” He flung his hands up in frustration.

“You know what this is,” said Stephen.

“I gave her to Richard because I knew it would make me want her more? Is that what I’ve done? Set myself up for desire?”

“Is that what you’ve done?” asked Stephen softly.

“No. I don’t know.”

“How long before you have to give the ridiculous sub back to Richard?”

“Hey,” I said.

Stephen gave a deep sigh. “Go and take Bronte into the garden, Mia. The door’s through there.” He pointed to the kitchen.

“I can’t stay?”

“Cameron and I need to talk.”

“Does he know about Lance?” I got up from the couch.

“We’re going to talk about that too,” said Cameron.

“Shouldn’t I stay for that? Considering it’s me Lance wants.”

Stephen steepled his fingers. “Quite the Cleopatra, aren’t you, Mia?”

“What does that mean?”

“You have many admirers and they’re all willing to lay down their lives for you,” said Cameron.

“There aren’t any asps in your garden, are there?” I said, heading into the kitchen.

“Go with her, Bronte,” said Stephen. “Guard our queen.”

Bronte followed me out.

The door closed behind us, and despite my attempt to listen in to their conversation, this old thick wood prevented it. These thick walls kept their heat in and eavesdroppers like me away.

The chill of the early morning hit me when I opened the back door.

The garden was long and thin and very green. Several small trees, naked of flowers, lined the end, and it made me wonder if they were rose bushes. There, in the corner, lay a tennis ball. Trotting over to it, followed by Bronte, I picked it up and threw it to the other end of the garden. Bronte bolted after it.

We played ball like that for what seemed ages, Bronte and I whiling away the time, and I almost forgot all the seriousness that had followed me here.

Despite the chill, the air was refreshing, and running around kept me warm. Although I felt I could go back into the house at any time, I liked it that Cameron had someone to talk to. Dr. Finely was easily Cameron’s equal.

After twenty minutes, though it could have been longer, Cameron appeared in the doorway and headed on over to me. He patted his arms dramatically at the cold and then picked up the tennis ball and threw it. Bronte scampered after it and quickly brought it back to him. Cameron’s grin broadened as he threw the ball another time for an overly excited Bronte.

“Well you’ve won over Dr. Finley,” he said. “No surprise there.”

“It was very enlightening,” I said, arching a brow.

“It wasn’t my intention for you to hear all that,” he said. “Finley goes right for the psychological jugular. As you’ve discovered.”

“So when’s my session?” I said.

“He doesn’t believe it’s necessary.”

Bronte nudged my fingers with his nose. I eased the ball from his teeth and threw it across the garden again.

I turned to Cameron. “Are you leaving me alone with Shay again?”

Doubt flashed across his face. “Do you want me to?”

“Of course not.”

“Okay, good. We have what looks like a plan,” he said. “I hope you’re open to it.”

I gave a nod I was ready to hear it.

Cameron turned to face the house. “Dr. Finley believes that you and I have created a co-perfect ideal about each other. Having spent such little time together in what would be considered a normal situation, we’ve built up an unrealistic ideal.”

“So what you’re essentially saying is that you’re not perfect?”

“And the probability of you really being this flawless is unrealistic,” said Cameron. “Apparently.”

“So what’s the plan?”

Cameron watched Bronte running around with the ball still between his teeth. “Finley believes we can kill two birds with one stone.”

“How?”

“Well, he surmises that hiding from Lance is a mistake. It makes us look weak. Feeds into Lance’s power complex.”

“So we can come out of hiding?” I said.

“Yes. With Shay’s approval, of course.”

“I hope he agrees.”

“He will,” said Cameron. “Finley also recommends that you and I spend intensive time together. Get to know each other better. That way I’ll inevitably grow tired of your immaturity and annoying innocence—”

“Excuse me?” I rested my hands on my hips.

He gestured his need to go on. “And you’ll become overwhelmed with my need to control you, overpower every aspect of your life, and dominate you, not to mention my insatiable need to fuck you half to death. You’ll eventually want nothing more to do with me.”

“Are you serious?”

“Quite serious.”

“I’m not immature.”

“You kind of are.”

“In what way?”

He arched a brow. “You have a Hello-Kitty makeup bag.”

I waved off his accusation. “Choose something else.”

“You’re argumentative.”

“Well you’re bossy.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.”

“And very overpowering.”

“Looks like you’re taking annoying to a whole new level.”

“How long is this experiment meant to last?” I said.

“Couple of days, though to be honest my tolerance limit is kicking in right about now.”

“You’re an arrogant ass.”

“You dare to speak to me like that?”

“What are you going to do? Punish me?”

“I will spank you, yes.” He lowered his gaze. “Apparently we’re permitted to have sex.”

“Oh.” That familiar stirring moved low in my belly.

“So fucking is in,” he said.

I gave a look of how convenient for you.

“I don’t expect to enjoy your company, Mia.”

“And I know I’ll find your dominance suffocating,” I said.

“I’ll have to push you hard in order to push you away.”

“Looks like you’ve already started.”

He glared at me. “I’m going to kiss you now.”

“If you must.”

He stepped forwards and cupped my face with strong hands. Our lips met and his kiss was possessive. His tongue demanded control, battling my tongue as though the fight had already begun. He forced my surrender.

Oh God. Merely his kiss weakened my resolve and sent delicious tingles below. Those nips to my lower lip, then a deeper kiss sending me hurtling toward the edge.

Cameron broke away. “Finley’s a fucking genius.”

CHAPTER 7

SHAY DIDN’T LIKE the plan.

Sitting beside Cameron in the back of the Rolls, with Shay sitting opposite, I listened to them arguing and sounding more like old friends than boss and employee.

“That champagne and note didn’t strike you as a threat?” said Shay.

“It’s unlike you to be passive aggressive,” said Cameron.

Shay shook his head. “I’m worried about you.”

“Lance knows we left the hotel because of it,” said Cameron. “I refuse to let him know his bully tactics are working.”

“I’m not saying roll over and show your balls. Just maintain a low profile and stay out of the tabloids.”

“Tabloids?” I said.

Shay flashed an annoyed glance. “Yes, Mia, as soon as the press discover Cole’s in town they’ll track your every move. It won’t be just Lance Merrill on your tail but the paparazzi too. They’ll do his work for him.”

“Why would the press be interested in us?” I said.

Shay held Cameron’s stare. “She does know, right?”

“I’m fodder for the press, Mia,” said Cameron. “Any family with money are at risk.”

“Cole’s a well known bachelor in the US,” said Shay. “I thought you knew this?”

“Cole Tea?” I said, confirming I did, but I’d never seen any article on him before. “I’ve never read anything on you.”

“When was the last time you read Time Magazine?” asked Shay. “Or Rolling Stone, or Empire?”

Um…never.

“She has no idea,” said Shay.

“Go easy on her,” said Cameron. “Look, I’ve phoned Richard. He’s signed off on this.”

“Until he sees a photo of you two on the cover of Hello magazine,” said Shay.

“What did Richard say?” I asked. “Has he talked with Lance?”

“Richard’s meeting with him today,” said Shay.

“Can I talk to Richard?” I said.

Shay shrugged. “He’s flying in tomorrow night.”

“And by then both our problems will be solved,” said Cameron dryly.

“What other problem?” asked Shay.

“A private matter I’m dealing with.”

I gave Cameron a glare.

“Shouldn’t I know about this issue?” said Shay.

“Hence the word private,” said Cameron.

I glanced at the passing scenery. “It’s my problem too.”

Cameron ignored me. “Shay, can you guarantee our safety?”

“My men have protected presidents, so, yes, it’s doable. Why don’t you go stay in a cottage in Scotland until Richard’s gotten through Lance’s thick skull?”

Cameron let out a deep sigh. “Mia wants to see London, don’t you?”

I swapped a nervous glance with Shay. “Not if it puts you in danger.”

“Let’s regroup at Chelsea Crescent,” said Cameron.

Shay looked exasperated. “Do you have any aspirin in the house?”

“Yes. I don’t want to see your men,” Cameron told him. “No fuss. No bother—”

“I specialize in fantasies,” said Shay dryly.

“Come on,” said Cameron. “I deserve some fun.”

Shay slumped back. “There’s no denying that.” He turned and tapped the divider.

The glass slid down, revealing the cap wearing driver. “Yes, sir?”

“Westminster,” said Shay.

“Yes, sir.”

“Thank you, Shay,” said Cameron. “I feel confident this is the best decision.” He reached for my hand and squeezed it.

Cameron and Shay chatted away while I stared out the window.

Not only were we now about to expose ourselves to any attack Lance might come up with, I also had to contend with being Cameron’s problem to solve.

I pretended all this drama wasn’t getting to me, offering a polite smile when they shared a joke, or answering their question about what I was most looking forward to seeing in London.

I made up some story and they both seemed happy with it.

We parked outside a high end corner coffee house and Cameron ran in to buy four coffees, which included one for the driver, despite Shay insisting he wanted to go in for us.

I was getting tired of all this running. All this intensity. All this being held at arm’s length. The only consolation was I got to spend more time with Cameron. Dragging out what little time we had left.

He got back in the car and handed us each our piping hot drinks. We pulled away from the curb and drove onwards.

Somewhere during that journey, I handed my cup to Cameron and snuggled into the corner and nodded off. Jet lag and this over the top adventure had gotten to me. That and the welcome warmth of the car.

I stirred, woken by whispers.

“Guess where you’re going?” said Shay.

I rubbed my eyes and peered out at a double-decker bus beside us, full to the brim of tourists.

“We’re going on a bus!” I said.

“I think we can do better than that,” said Cameron.

The bus pulled away, leaving our view clear, and there, rising majestically to our right, was Buckingham Palace. I remembered it from watching the royal wedding with Bailey and Tara.

We’d made salmon and cucumber sandwiches that day and had been joined by Bailey’s English neighbor Gareth, who’d talked us through the entire event. From all our giggles and oohs and ahs, you would have thought it was us getting married.

My gaze shot to Cameron and then Shay, trying to get a read on them.

“Her Majesty’s not in,” said Shay.

Cameron gave a nod. “Union Jack’s up.” And on my confused frown, he added, “The Union Jack is the British flag. It’s tradition to fly the Royal Standard when the Queen is in residence.”

“Are we going in there?” I said.

“Turns out Aunt Rose has friends in high places,” he said.

“We’re going to Buckingham Palace?” I screeched it, wishing I could call Bailey and tell her. “Are we going on a tour?”

“Public tours are only held in the summer,” said Cameron.

“Does your aunt know the Queen?” I said.

Cameron chuckled. “Doubt it.”

Our car pulled up outside the large front iron gates. A few tourists turned to stare at us, probably expecting to see VIP’s stepping out. A few of them snapped photos of the car.

“We walk from here,” said Cameron.

“Call me when you’re ready to be picked up,” said Shay.

“You’re not coming with us?” I said.

“No, Mia, go have some fun with this guy. Keep him out of mischief.”

“I can’t promise that,” I said, beaming.

Cameron chatted with the military guard and we were permitted to head on through the grandest gate I’d ever seen.

We were expected.

Gripping Cameron’s hand and trying to look cool and not hyperventilate from excitement, I strolled leisurely beside him as we made our way across the front courtyard. We passed under the stone archway and through a large door that led us into the palace.

Men dressed in red and black uniforms stood guard; they were frozen to the spot, with their gazes forward.

Within a minute or two of waiting in the foyer, we were greeted warmly.

“Molly Jones,” said a short plump woman, introducing herself. She shook Cameron’s hand. “How’s the British weather treating you?”

She shook my hand firmly. “It’s bloody cold,” I told her.

Which made her laugh.

And Cameron shook his head, amused. “Exactly what she said.” He beamed at me.

Which I took as forgiveness for my outburst in what was meant to be the poshest place on the planet.

Cameron went on to thank Molly for her going out of her way and inviting us here to visit the palace. Molly told us it was her pleasure.

She put me at ease as she led us off on our private tour, sharing that she’d worked here for over twenty years and that every day was different. She told us Buckingham Palace had first started out to serve the royals as a modest retreat. Over the years, as kings and queens had graced the halls with their presence, it had evolved into one of the most famous buildings in the world.

However I’d imagined this place to be, never could I have dreamed up such lavishness, such grandeur. As we strolled from the vastness of room to room, each with their own distinct décor and distinct lavish theme, whether it was the rich greens and golds, or deep reds and silvers, all of them flaunted their perfection.

It made me feel so small.

“Well?” said Cameron. “What do you think?”

“It’s incredible,” I whispered, aware of the inadequacy in my vocabulary. “What do you think?”

“I feel for the people who grew up here,” he said wistfully.

And Molly gave him a knowing look.

“We’re all one big family,” she said. “This is more than a job. It’s a vocation.”

It was wonderful to hear about her starting working here as a young woman. She’d met her husband here and never wanted to work anywhere else.

We were led down the longest of hallways and it felt like we were trekking for miles. Molly chatted casually with Cameron about the palace’s grand collections of art. He really was a connoisseur of the fine arts and I remembered those grand paintings hanging on the walls back in his Beverly Hills home.

Molly pointed to this painting, or that statue, sharing her knowledge of each piece. Like the sculpture of a man’s face by a remarkable artist named Bertel Thorvaldsen, who’d captured the expression of a man’s calmness in marble, or the endless display by artists I’d actually heard of, like Raphael’s St. Paul Preaching in Athens, or the lifelike self-portrait by Rembrandt. Molly shared that Rembrandt had endured great tragedy during his life and had even lived in poverty, which was such a surprise considering his remarkable talent.

We even caught up on the history of court gossip, learning a shocking story that in 1873, during a visit by the Shah of Persia, he had one of his servants beaten so badly that the man had died. Apparently he was buried here.

Cameron made a quip about my ghost hunters having a field day.

And Molly agreed with a smile.

She also told us guests invited to stay at the palace would be asked about their likes and dislikes, as the Queen went out of her way to discover their tastes to make sure their time here was comfortable.

“The public don’t get to see this part of the palace,” said Molly, guiding us down a red carpet lined hallway. “These are the private chambers dedicated to preserving national treasures.”

My heart leapt with joy when I realized I’d be getting a sneak peek inside rooms that housed antiquities only the few were lucky enough to see. I knew the privilege of this visit and squeezed Cameron’s hand repeatedly to thank him.

He beamed back. “We’ll send Aunt Rose some flowers.”

Molly lowered her gaze as she addressed Cameron. “Well, if you’ll excuse me, I have a staff meeting to attend. How about an hour?”

“Sounds perfect,” said Cameron. “We promise not to touch anything.”

“It’s a pleasure showing you around. A real honor, sir.”

“The pleasure is all ours.” Cameron waited until she disappeared from sight.

“She’s going to let us wander around alone?” I said.

“The palace is strewn with cameras. Except this part of the house. This is where visiting dignitaries stay.”

“They trust us?”

“Of course.”

These moments unfolded in a dreamy haze. Both of us took our time to appreciate each piece of furniture, or lingered to admire the grandest collection of artwork. We moved through the endless suites and checked out a few of the many bedrooms.

The last bedroom we entered was furnished elegantly in deep burgundy tones. The four poster was easily the biggest bed I’d ever seen, with its dark wooden carved posts rising high toward the vast ceiling.

The most striking piece of furniture was the large throne resting upon a wooden platform.

Cameron tugged me over to it. “This is a replica of King Henry the Eighth’s throne.”

I imagined the original had crumbed into dust by now.

Running my hand over the armrest, I could hardly believe I was allowed to touch it. “It’s wide.”

“He was a big man,” he said. “I told Aunt Rose about your fascination with the Tudors and she told me about this room. She advised us to check it out.”

“You talked to your aunt about me?”

“She’s very fond of you. She lost her husband when she was very young and never remarried. She doted on us kids. Even went out of her way to visit us in school.”

I loved his aunt, although I’d only met her once, and that had been during the unusual experience of me being caught nude in Cameron’s foyer by her. Aunt Rose’s calm reaction and kindness during dinner had endeared me to her. I was grateful she still liked me after that debacle.

“I’m surprised she didn’t warn you off me,” I said.

“Quite the opposite.” His gaze fell on the portrait before us. “Anne Boleyn,” He pointed. “Painted before she was married.”

She looked kind of plain, and I wondered if the artist had toned down her beauty in an attempt to save her from the King’s advances.

“Poor Anne Boleyn,” I said. “She must have been terrified of him.”

“I imagine she had no idea he would chop off her head,” he said. “After all, he’d only just divorced Catherine of Aragon and there’d been no sign of the pending carnage yet to be unleashed on all his wives.”

“What did she do wrong?”

“Hard to say. Anne had enemies at court. Apparently Cromwell, the king’s right hand man, hated her. He accused her of plotting against the King. Henry was invested in marrying Jane Seymour, so it didn’t take much to persuade him.”

“How do you know so much?”

“A misspent youth in a private school.”

“Didn’t Anne go to the tower for a while?”

“Yes, and then a French swordsman ended her life at the king’s behest.”

“You wouldn’t have chopped off Anne’s head, would you?” I said, pleading. “If you’d been king?”

“I’d have been a lot more imaginative,” he said. “My punishment of choice would be extracting the truth out of her using unusual and yet effective means.”

A rush of blood, a sudden blush. “How?” I said huskily.

His lips curled into a dangerous smile. “Sounds like you’re asking for a demonstration?”

A curl of excitement settled low.

With his gaze locked on mine, he unbuttoned his coat then removed it slowly, before throwing it onto the end of the bed.

“Sir?” My mind raced with the idea Cameron might be this reckless.

“Take off your coat.”

I unbuttoned it and threw it over his.

“Would you like to see how I would have punished Anne?”

“Yes please, sir.”

He took my hands and rested them on the end of the throne’s armrests, guiding one to either side. “I would have placed her hands here, like this.”

“She would probably have relented,” I said softly, “realizing how much she deserved to be punished.”

“I imagine she would, yes.”

Leaning over and shoving my butt out, I glanced toward the door, hoping we wouldn’t get caught.

“Look forward,” he snapped.

Cameron hoisted my skirt above my waist. His firm fingers stroked my sensitive flesh as he eased my panties down my thighs and they pooled around my ankles. I gripped the armrests, staring forwards, thrilled with this building anticipation. His hand trailed over my buttocks.

Spank.

I jolted forwards and quickly righted myself to remain bent over.

“Higher,” he ordered.

Curving my spine, I offered my buttocks out to him. That exquisite low thrum wooed me into submission.

Endless spanks echoed.

Delicious strikes sent shockwaves all the way into my sex.

“This is how I’d deal with a disobedient queen,” he said darkly.

I exulted when the strikes became more violent, shooting me right into subspace, and the heady thought I was clutching at a king’s throne made my head spin out of control.

For goodness sake, I was being spanked in Buckingham Palace by the great Cameron Cole; blood rushed through my ears.

His hand caressed my heated flesh between strikes, running over my cleft and landing spanks there too. His cologne fired my senses.

Nothing was beyond this man.

He kneeled behind me, his breath warm on my thigh. “This might have worked on her better.” He parted my cheeks and brought his head between my thighs. His tongue trailed over that puckered flesh, and lower still, lashing at my cleft, flicking and licking as he went, suckling my clit.

I let out a long moan.

“If you were my master,” I said, my voice low, my body riddled with passion, my hips rocking against his mouth, “I’d have worshiped at your feet with you sitting here.”

“But as your master,” he rose to his feet and turned me around to face him then nudged me back to sit on the throne, “it would be my duty to idolize you.” He pried apart my thighs and he again sunk to his knees, his face burying between my legs, his tongue meeting my clit again with stunning precision. “To honor you.” He suckled, his tongue swirling.

Bringing me over, making me tremble, I bit down on my hand to suppress my cries.

He lifted my thighs and spread my legs wide apart, pulling them over each armrest, exposing me completely.

Cameron rose to his feet and stood before me so masterfully, so domineering, his expression full of power. “Would you have submitted?”

“Oh yes, sir.”

He eased himself out of his pants, his cock hard and ready. “The worship of you would have continued night and day—”

He slid inside me.

I arched my back at the strain of him stretching me wide; those pangs of bliss. My pussy spasmed around his length, deliciously expanding.

He thrust hard. “Until you’d understood what you really meant to me, as my monarch.”

“I’d be your one and only.”

“One and only.”

Taut around him, my sex glistened.

“I love watching my cock disappear inside you,” he whispered breathlessly, his eyes burning with the deepest desire.

His intensity rose, and his fierceness was hypnotic.

We both stared down at the beautiful spectacle of his hardness disappearing, sliding in and out slowly, controlled, the tip being brought out. His hand guided his cock to slide over the surface of my clit, then he slapped his erection over that delicate nub, before again resting at my entrance, only to plunge fully inside with precision, his balls striking me as he went. The process repeated and repeated again until all I knew was this--this pattern, this pressure, this pleasure, this need for him.

“Sir,” I pleaded.

“You may come.”

That strike to my clit with his cock, that pause, this thrust, these shockwaves of bliss capturing every cell in my body—it all sent me outside of myself.

On and on and on…

The world slipped away and my climax carried me off into nothingness. My eyes squeezed shut as I savored his brilliance at holding me suspended in this place. My orgasm seemed never ending, and this proved he was more than a master of the Kama Sutra--he was the God of sex.

My moans echoed around us.

Until my body could take no more and I collapsed in the chair, staring up at his beautiful face. His expression grew wistful, and his gaze filled with longing.

“This,” I whispered, nudging him away from me. “This is true adoration.” I slipped off the throne and it was my turn to guide Cameron to sit.

His frown deepened as his usual power over me was suspended.

Kneeling at his feet, my face buried in his lap and I sucked him all the way into my mouth. The stunning sweet taste of me on him, the erotic sensations lingering low, made me crazy for him.

He raised his hips, his fingernails digging into the armrests, his breathing rapid and stuttering…

And I centered all my attention on my rapid movement to rise and fall, using all the tricks he’d taught me along with a few of my own. My hands cupped his balls in perfect rhythm to my head bobbing between his thighs. My tongue swirled and flicked as I went, until I felt his trembling, his loss of control, his surrendering.

“Master, come for me.” My lips snapped back over his length, sucking hard.

Cameron went rigid. His hips raised and his breath stilted as he came in my mouth, flooding me with warmth. His hardness pounded against me in a furious burst of pleasure as it reached its pinnacle.

Swallowing all of him, I let out a long groan of pleasure, grateful he’d trusted me enough to let me take him like this. Our shifting power was proof of our growing trust.

He settled into the seat, his breathing slowing, his hands guiding my head to rest on his lap. “Mia, what was that?”

I peered up at him, nervous I’d somehow let him down, worried I’d not pleased him.

He grabbed locks of my hair, which stung my scalp, and held me tightly in his grip. “I had no idea how a man could be willing to give up a kingdom.” His head crashed against the headrest. “God, now I get it.”

CHAPTER 8

THERE WAS NO more talk of giving up kingdoms.

Or any further discussion of me taking his breath away. We’d merely straightened our clothes, put our coats back on, and left to go reunite with Molly.

Our passionate interlude became merely another miraculous memory.

My cheeks were flushed and my body thrummed with pleasure. The echo of Cameron’s touch lingered.

On our way out, Molly gifted us with a union flag umbrella and a Buckingham Palace heart key fob. There was a twinkle in her eye as she handed it over.

Cameron told Molly he would be delighted to return her kindness, and should she ever visit California he would make sure her stay was a pleasant one. It had been wonderful to see Molly blush and swoon, showing a glimpse of her playful side.

Declining the car Shay had arranged for us, we caught a taxi instead, heading over to Saint Paul’s Cathedral.

The breathtaking church was vast and spectacular and profoundly moving, and easily one of the most remarkable places I’d ever visited. Crowds of visitors swirled around us and we eased on through to the front chapel.

Cameron had me stand beneath the main dome, and as we peered up, admiring that round inlaid gold offset by the surrounding stunning marble, he explained the optical illusion. Sir Christopher Wren had utilized geometry technology, Cameron told me, designing a cone shape for structural purposes, and around it that magnificence dome shape. There was a balcony around the outside, but with the optical illusion it created you’d never have guessed it.

It stunned me to think this beautiful place first began construction in 1675. Cameron knew so much about British history, and I leaned against him as he relayed his knowledge, telling me what he knew about London and how people had lived back then.

I let out a long sigh of contentment.

“I have a gift for you,” said Cameron, and he reached into his coat pocket and withdrew a small box.

He eased out sapphire studs and gently slid them into my lobes, his fingers tender.

“What’s this for?” I said, leaning into his hand as it brushed against my face.

“A reminder of our time together.”

“They’re beautiful.”

“Don’t ever take them out. Not even when you sleep. Understand?”

I told him I wouldn’t and thanked him again, pushing myself up onto my toes to kiss him.

He tucked the box back into his pocket.

We continued on through and Cameron explained that the pineapple above the towers symbolized peace, prosperity, and hospitably. As we strolled arm and arm down the west front, he gestured to the sculpture of St Paul, telling me this was the work of Francis Bird, who sculptured it in the early 1700’s. Apparently, Bird also carved the statue of Queen Anne that stood in the front of the cathedral.

Rain poured as we hurried out to the street, and we were grateful for Molly’s gift of the umbrella.

We caught another taxi and it was fun to pretend we’d lost Shay and his mysterious men we never caught a glimpse of. We were free to explore, with the illusion of privacy, and I loved it. I relaxed for the first time since we’d arrived.

“Although this is out of character,” said Cameron, “how would you like to choose where we go next?”

I beamed at him.

“I’ll reel off destinations. You decide.”

I sat forward, excited to hear.

“The Goring serves excellent tea. And by tea I mean finger sandwiches, cakes, and of course tea.”

“Let’s go there.” I flung my hands up.

He laughed. “You haven’t heard the second choice.”

“What’s the second choice?”

“Harrods,” he said. “We can shop for a while and then have tea there.”

“Let’s go there,” I said, giggling.

“Instead of the Goring?”

“Yes, instead of the Goring. Harrods.”

“Or.”

I was in a giggling fit and he was shaking his head, amused.

“We can go to the Ritz.” He raised his hand. “Let me guess. You want to go to the Ritz?”

“Can we go to all three?”

“Well we could, but then we wouldn’t have time to go to a very special place I’ve been planning for you later this afternoon.”

“For me?”

“Yes, I know you’ll love it, but it’s a surprise.”

“Where would you like to go?” I said.

“You choose.”

“Which one is your favorite?”

“They all offer something different.”

“I can’t decide.”

“We need to tell our driver where to take us.”

“Harrods,” I said. “Let’s go to Harrods.”

Cameron told me this was an excellent choice and instructed the driver to take us there.

Our taxi nudged through the city traffic.

The doorman welcomed us in.

Even after having visited some of the most high end stores in America, like my favorite, Bloomingdales, I was still not prepared for how Harrods wooed me. With its Egyptian styled lobby, to its wide assortment of luxury items, this place had everything, and its floors went on forever.

Cameron led me through the crowd of shoppers and we soon found a well needed space to take everything in and steal a hug. We went from floor to floor exploring, and I had to stop mentioning how much I liked this or that as Cameron kept offering to buy it for me. Which was ridiculous, because I’d even pointed to an enormous Buddha I knew Richard would love.

“Well get it for him,” said Cameron warmly.

I’d managed to dissuade him, forcing Cameron to shove his wallet back in his pocket.

We ended up in Harrods’s Caffe Florian, tucked away at a corner table with a pristine white cloth and silver cutlery.

I followed Cameron’s lead and placed my napkin on my lap. In the corner, a pianist elegantly struck the keys, the haunting notes stirring melancholy.

“Claude Debassy,” Cameron told me.

The waitress introduced herself as Sarah, and poured freshly brewed tea from a sliver pot into two delicate china cups. A slice of chocolate cake was placed between us. Cameron arched a mischievous brow and reach for his fork and I reached for mine.

“Let the best man win,” he said.

Between sips of tea, we took bites of mouthwatering cake. The sponge was moist and tasted nutty; the icing enhanced the sweetness.

Cameron used his fork to tackle mine and I tackled back, scooping up another mouthful.

I held the last piece out to him. “Here you are.”

He waved it off and gestured for me to finish it.

My eyes lit up as I savored the last crumbs melting on my tongue, and I beamed Cameron’s way.

“I don’t recall ever seeing you quite this happy,” he joked.

I sat back, lulled by all this sugar.

Cameron peered at the plate. “The case of the missing chocolate cake.” His gaze met mine. “Aha. Evidence.” He leaned over and dabbed my mouth with his napkin, and his touch sent tingles into my cheek.

I beamed at him.

He reached across the table and held my hand, making small circles with his fingertips on my arm, seemingly lost in thought.

His gaze rose to watch the piano player.

The man was dressed smartly in a tux and struck the keys beautifully.

“The thing about artists,” said Cameron, “whether it’s writers, or painters, or singers, or musicians, is that when they’re in the zone they leave the room.”

“Really?” I said.

“Picasso stated he left his body behind when he entered the room to paint. It always surprises me how so many artists we know today as geniuses died in poverty or under tragic circumstances. As though the world wasn’t ready for them.”

“Like Rembrandt,” I said, remembering his self-portrait.

“Yes.” Cameron gestured towards the piano player. “I wonder if anyone else considers the hours he spent mastering those keys.”

I looked around at the other diners enjoying their tea. “I’m sure they do. Do you play an instrument?”

He gave a shrug. “Piano, when I was younger.”

“Not now?”

“No.”

“That’s a hard instrument to learn.”

He gave a shrug.

“There so much to you, Cameron. I love discovering more about you.”

His eyes held mine and it was easy to disappear inside that warm gaze, that wonderful promise of learning more.

He gave a look of confusion. “I imagine you miss Richard?”

“A little.”

“Me too. Until I met you, he was the only other person capable of bringing out my playful side. You’re like a female Richard.”

“I like the sound of that.”

He gave a nod indicating he did too. “He’s an extraordinary man. Thank you for making him so happy.”

“He makes me happy. Even if he wasn’t able to reach me like you did.”

“I understand Richard’s reservations,” he said. “It’s a reflection on how much he cares about you.”

“Enthrall feels like one big family. I feel so at home there.”

“We can’t imagine the place without you. That offer I made to support a career in fashion still stands.”

“That means the world to me. I really am giving it serious thought.”

“Is there something on your mind?”

“Our time at Chrysalis was spectacular.”

“I agree.”

“How’s Richard going to react…”

Cameron twisted his mouth. “You don’t know, do you?”

My gaze shot from the piano player to Cameron.

“You and me together is one of Richard kinks.” He raised his hand in a warning. “One I took advantage of, however.”

“Kink?”

“I’ll tell him not to share you,” he said. “You’re far from ready. That’s why I resisted the demonstration of a ménage a trois in the Harrington Suite.”

“Richard gets off on knowing we’re having sex?” I whispered.

“Usually he’s watching.”

Richard and I had never discussed this, and I hoped it wasn’t one of his hard limits.

Cameron brushed a stray hair out of my face and tucked it behind an ear. “So you don’t have to worry.”

Yeah, thanks for that. No worry here. Nope. All good. Discovering your boyfriend has the mother of all kinks is just a normal occurrence, folks. Nothing to see here. Just move along, please.

“Mia?”

“Yes.”

“You okay?”

I let out a sigh. “Richard looked riled up when he came to your home in Beverly Hills to get me?”

“He calmed down.”

“It doesn’t make any sense.”

“Well, he trusts me. Completely.” Cameron glanced at his watch. “I’ve kept him updated on your training. He’s excited with your progress. He’s grateful. My job is to keep you safe.”

“You’re both lucky I’m not the crazy girl type,” I said. “If I was you’d have unleashed hell on yourselves.”

“I profiled you. Your affection towards me is endearing.”

“Cameron, I’ll always—”

“Let’s go over what’s expected as we proceed toward your return.”

I swallowed hard at his transition.

With a glance around, I confirmed our conversation wouldn’t be overheard.

Cameron spoke firmly, as though making a presentation in a boardroom, explaining intricately the expectations of a true master and submissive relationship.

The kind Richard wanted.

Demanded.

I must follow every order willingly and without hesitation, always available for sex and, more controversial still, should Richard and I ever be out in public I must always show respect and never contradict him.

I slid my fork over the dessert plate and scraped up what was left of the sauce. I lifted it to my mouth and licked it off, trailing my tongue over chocolate covered prongs, my gaze locked on Cameron.

“It’s going to be a challenge for you, Mia.” His gaze settled on my lips. “Despite this, I believe it will help you control your smart mouth and teach you to listen more. There are benefits.”

“There are more benefits for my master if I’m subservient.”

“You’ll be spoiled beyond belief.”

“But must compromise my free speech.”

“It’s a lifestyle choice. One you’ve chosen.”

“I’ve so enjoyed today,” I said. “I must thank Dr. Finely for his suggestion that we should just go off and have some fun. Thank you, Cameron. ”

His stare lingered, as though chastising me for changing the subject. “You underestimate me.”

I looked at him questioningly.

“You also misunderstood Dr. Finely. He wants you to know just how far I’m willing to push you. Just how unsuited we are for each other. This time together is about easing our separation.”

“Sounds sinister.”

“You’re ill suited to sinister. I have alternative means of degradation.”

What did that mean?

He reached into his pocket and placed a small navy silk pouch into my palm. “Return to me with these in.”

Pulling the string open I peeked inside—

Venus balls.

Having not known what these were upon my initial hiring at Enthrall, they’d gotten me fired. I was reassured these were not the same ones gifted to me by Monsieur Trouville back at Enthrall. These were intricately gold embossed spheres.

My focus returned to Cameron’s burning stare.

“This is a fine example of the kind of hesitation a master will not tolerate,” he said sternly.

Obeying, I rose from my chair and followed the signs for the powder room, clutching this small velvet pouch as a thrill shot up my spine.

Discovering Richard took pleasure in sharing me left an unexplored doubt. It did however lift my guilt for all the amazing sex I’d had with Cameron. I pushed those thoughts aside, resigning to the fact they’d have to be returned to later.

Inside the luxury cubicle, I mused these beautiful restrooms were only rivaled by the ones back at Chrysalis. I pulled down my panties and inserted those delicate balls. A rush of pleasure engulfed my sex as my fingers nudged them up farther inside. My thumb circled my clit to tease.

Leaning up against the bathroom stall door, I stole a few seconds to savor the ripples of pleasure between my thighs. A naughty sub flicking her clit in rebellion.

Which didn’t exactly help and only made my need more intense.

After washing my hands and catching my flushed cheeks in the mirror, seeing a hint of vixen in my expression, I returned to sit beside Cameron.

Exhilarated to be back in his favor.

“Thank you, sir,” I said breathlessly.

“You obeyed?”

“Yes.” A bite of my lip. A pout of pleasure.

Cameron gave a nod of approval. “We were discussing your training.”

Half-distracted, I noticed our teacups were topped up. “Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.”

A buzzing inside brought blinding pleasure.

Pressing my fingertips to my lips, I tried to understand why my pussy was pulsating, deliciously quivering. These fricken balls were vibrating.

I shot Cameron a look.

His hand was inside his coat pocket.

The buzzing stopped.

“Are these remote?” I said huskily. “Are you controlling—”

They fired up again.

Spasms of pleasure snatched my next breath.

I scanned the room, self-conscious someone might notice, but the pulsing was so intense it made me freeze, slump forward slightly, and let out a deep sigh.

“It’s an interesting fact that Freud believed a clitoral orgasm was infantile,” said Cameron casually, “and a vaginal orgasm represented maturity. Womanhood.”

“That’s interesting,” I managed. “Please, turn it off.”

“Sir,” he admonished.

“Sir.”

The buzz revved up another notch, the intensity causing me to blush wildly, to squirm, to lean back and clutch the table. The vibrations shot jolts of erotic spasms into my clit. Tingly, mind altering sensations reached my belly then rose up to my nipples, which were taut and wantonly pointing through my blouse.

“You were saying?” said Cameron.

“It’s too much.”

“I love watching you come,” he whispered.

I pounced on his pocket, reaching in. My fingers wrapped around the remote and tugged at it. His strong fingers wrapped around mine.

We grappled for it.

He grabbed it back and my fingernails dug in to his hand as I pried the device away from him, trying to ignore this blissful pussy party going on in my panties.

He had the remote again and fired it up onto full.

I’d never heard Cameron giggle before and he sounded so cute, so adorable, but I wasn’t letting him off lightly. Snatching the device out of his pocket, I brought it to my lap, using my napkin to cover it.

I sat back in my seat, ecstatic with my win, and turned it off, steadying my breathing. “Freud was wrong,” I said, sucking in another deep breath. “Wanna know why?”

Cameron grinned. “Do share your theory, Ms. Lauren.”

“He didn’t have a vagina,” I said. “You men are so arrogant. You’re always on about Freud’s ‘Penis envy theory.’”

“Always on about?” He shook his head, amused. “Actually, that theory was presented in 1908. There’s been substantial exploration of it since. Including my own extensive testing.”

“Apparently you’re not asking the right questions.”

“Have a theory you’d like to share, Ms. Lauren?”

I leaned towards him and switched the vibrator back on low, whispering close to his ear, “There’s nothing like a clitoral and vaginal orgasm at the same time, sir. You guys are missing out. Truth is, you men have clit envy.”

His irises dilated, his jaw tensed, and he wore that feral expression.

“I’m so wet, sir.” I purred the words. “I’m fantasizing about your cock inside me.” I hovered my lips close to his. “Your cock is complemented by your finger strumming my clit.”

“Really?”

“I’m fantasizing about being upside down again back in your office,” I added huskily. “Your mouth on me. My tongue lapping at your balls. And if you’re lucky, I might suck you. Hard.” I gave him an oh yeah look.

Followed by a you’re a lucky bastard look.

“Mia.” He grinned.

“Sir,” I whispered. “I’m coming right now. Right here. And it feels amazing.”

“Mia.”

“You can’t stop me.”

He arched a brow and gestured behind me.

Sarah, our waitress, had returned with the check. “Um, I’ll just leave this on your table then.” She scurried away.

Oh. My. God.

I turned the vibrator off. And slapped my hand over my mouth.

Cameron laughed hysterically, wiping away tears as he pulled crisp new pounds from his wallet and placed them on the silver dish.

“Oh bloody hell,” I said, mimicking an English accent.

Cameron went off into another fit of giggles and grabbed my hand, mercifully leading me out of the café. My cheeks were scarlet and my embarrassment threatened never to lift.

Cameron took the remote off me.

“I know, I know,” I muttered. “Only good girls get to come.”

“Well at least you’ve remembered one thing I’ve taught you.”

“Where are we going now?” I said. “Does Harrods sell playroom accoutrements?”

He squeezed my hand. “Lingerie. My sub needs new panties.”

CHAPTER 9

I IMAGINED HOW scared she must have been.

Lady Jane Grey had been beheaded right there on the lawn before the white tower. The year had been 1554.

Cameron and I had listened intently, along with the group of other tourists, taking in every word that Ted spoke. Our guide wore the traditional suit of a Beefeater, dressed in a red uniform and wearing a large hat.

Cameron led me away, and not surprisingly seemed to know just as much as our guide on Lady Jane. She had, Cameron informed me, been crowned Queen of England for only nine days. Apparently she failed to gain the needed support of the other members in the Privy Council. Probably they’d been offered land and wealth should they offer their support to another monarch, a shrewdness lacking in Jane Grey’s camp. Mary I, the only child of Henry VIII and his first wife Catherine of Aragon, assembled a force to depose Jane, and ensured the council changed sides.

The decision led to an accusation of treason for Lady Jane, and after six months locked away in a dungeon here, Queen Mary I gave the order for Jane’s execution.

Cameron told me that one of the most compelling paintings of the actual incident had been captured by French artist Paul Delaroche, and historians believed Delaroche must have read the accounts documenting the day of Lady Jane’s execution.

Soon after climbing the scaffold, Jane had blindfolded herself. As she fumbled forwards, she failed to find the block with her hands, and cried, “What shall I do? Where is it?” Seconds before, she’d given a profound speech and asked for forgiveness. A statement based on wanting nothing bad to happen to her loved ones, no doubt.

Other than being cajoled into accepting the crown of England, she’d done nothing wrong.

“She was only sixteen years old when they executed her,” said Cameron, staring off.

“British history is horrible,” I said.

Cameron shook his head and led me across the green. “I imagine one day even this time will be looked back on with horror.”

“Even though we’ve come so far?”

“We still have such a long way to go.”

He told me the tower had once been the tallest building in London, though it was eventually overshadowed by the city that grew up around it.

The London Tower was a thousand years old.

We took our time viewing the well guarded exhibition of the crown jewels, the royal armory, and lingered a while in the part of the tower that showcased the torture devices. Both of us viewed with fascination the replica of the rack used to ensure Guy Fawkes confession. The contraption dislocated every bone in the body, causing so much pain you’d confess, guilty or not.

According to the brass plaque next to the rack, Guy Fawkes had been caught red handed and his torture was used to get him to reveal his co-conspirators.

I was reassured Cameron was equally taken aback by some of the pieces. The last thing I needed to see was a look of arousal when he took in any of these suckers.

When I shared this with Cameron, he fell into another fit of laughter. I enjoyed seeing him having fun, despite the downer mood of this place.

I reminded him I’d had the displeasure of seeing Chrysalis’s own collection of torture devices hidden away in a dungeon. A gathering of contraptions owned by Cameron’s predecessor, apparently, and evidently a man with a morbid curiosity. No way did I want to live under the roof of any home that housed these things.

Behind a glass case lay a three foot by two foot chopping block, which was made in the Victorian era, so visitors could get their fill of gruesome. I wondered if it was a replica of the one Lady Jane Grey had rested upon.

Cameron and I explored the tower’s uppermost prison cells. We joined up with a tour group and learned from the young vibrant guide about the many famous men and woman in history who’d been detained in these very cells.

After twenty minutes or so, we were invited to look around on our own.

I went on ahead of Cameron, noting that old brass key in the large wooden and brass studded door. It reminded me of my mom’s old key collection. It would be lost to history now, like those old photos of my childhood, or those toys I’d once loved until they’d fallen apart.

Perhaps that’s all we want really, I thought, not to be forgotten after our death. Needing to believe our lives have meaning. Those words spoken by Lady Jane Grey seconds before she’d been beheaded were proof enough she’d hoped not to be forgotten.

I ran my fingers over the thick stone bricks and uneven cement, marveling these dated back a millennium. These same walls had detained prisoners. I imagined the captives peering out their cell turret, fearing not only for their future but that the rest of the world had forgotten them.

The men must have regretted their religious or political outbursts that had gotten them imprisoned, or those once queens held captive had to have rued the day they’d caught the eye of the king. Apparently, Catherine Howard had only been nineteen when she was beheaded, though rumor had it she was younger.

My fingers traced the grooves and fissures where prisoners had left their mark by carving graffiti into the stone. These thick walls were meant to hold in the heat, but in here, with no fireplace, they must have been frozen to the bone during those long winter nights. The echoes from other dungeons resounded, and perhaps cries from the other prisoners would have carried during those long dark nights.

I patted my arms to hold off the chill.

This place had to be haunted, and I told Cameron that.

“We’re more at risk from the ghosts of our past ever haunting,” he said wistfully.

“We need to free them,” I said. “To find peace.”

He bowed his head and ambled off, trailing his hand along the wall as though the melancholy of this place had gotten to him.

My feet froze rigid to the ground.

Cameron had once told me he had no regrets, no demons that tortured him. That he’d found this lifestyle of BDSM and enjoyed it freely without trying to purge his pain from his past.

From what he’d just told me, that didn’t make any sense. What if, like me, he had pain so deeply embedded he didn’t know it was there?

I doubled back down the stone hallway, heading the way we’d come, and went straight for the brass main door.

Cameron was an enigma. There were so many facets to him, so many colors, and after all he’d given me, done for me, I needed to feel I’d at least given him something profound in return. I wanted to ensure his chance of finding happiness.

Finding her.

Shay had hinted at a possible clue to a shadow hanging over Cameron. Perhaps even the reason he was so controlling, so unwilling to let go and truly love.

I refused to leave Cameron with any kind of pain dwelling in him.

I owed him this.

I turned the brass key in the lock.

And waited.

Cameron reappeared and patted his arms. “It’s cold,” he said, and went for the door.

I moved in behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist, and he spun around and nudged me back against the wall, pressing his body into mine and kissing me firmly. He broke into a smile against my lips and my heart melted.

“Body warmth,” he whispered. “Brilliant idea.”

“I’d like to talk with you,” I said.

“Oh?”

“Learn more about you. Understand you better.”

He nudged me away. “I’ve told you before, Mia. What you see is what you get.” He moved toward the door and turned the doorknob. “Well that’s not good.” He peered over at me.

“Guilty as charged.”

“You’re insatiable, Mia. Where’s the key?”

“You locked me in a dungeon. This is karma.”

He looked amused.

“And you tied me to the wall,” I said. “With a chain.”

He brushed a strand of hair out of my face. “You were extraordinary under capture.”

“Cameron, I’m serious.”

He stared at me. “You’re having second thoughts on its efficacy?”

“No, of course not. It helped. You freed me from my subconscious psychological pain. Now it’s my turn to reciprocate.”

“Where did you hide the key?”

“If I told you, it wouldn’t be hidden.”

“What is this?”

“I’ve discovered why you refuse to love.”

His gaze broke away from mine. “It’s a matter of finding the right person.”

“Cameron,” I whispered. “I was in the room with Dr. Finely. I heard everything. I know what Amare means.”

“Stephen threw that out—” Cameron waved his hand –“as a theory, not a fact.”

“I know about Afghanistan.”

He went quiet.

Footsteps shuffled along out there on stone. The voices of strangers moved away.

Confusion marred Cameron’s face. “Who have you been speaking with?”

“Someone who cares deeply for you.”

His gaze searched the ground.

“I know what happened.”

“The key, Mia. Please.”

“Not until you talk about it.”

“Key.”

“Cameron, I’m a lot gentler than you.”

“It takes years of training to do what I did with you. An easing of the subconscious. Do it wrong and…” He turned and faced the door, his hands splayed out on the wood. “I need it open.”

“Whatever you’re hiding is causing you pain,” I said. “I really believe—”

He swung for me and shoved me up against the door, pressing me against it, his fingers digging into my arms. “You have no idea what you’re doing.”

“Interesting response.”

His irises were large and black and full of anguish. “Where. Is. The. Key? Final time of asking.”

“Just tell me why you were there?”

He hands balled into fists. “Then you’ll tell me where the key is?”

“Yes.”

“You’ll stop asking questions?”

“Can’t promise that.”

“No, you will, Mia.”

“Listen to yourself, Cameron. You’re still hurting.”

He broke away and stepped back, staring at nothing.

“I want to see you happy,” I said. “See you free from what’s haunting you.”

“This is my burden to carry.” Cameron looked around the prison. “This is not up for discussion.”

My gaze held the ground.

It was easier not to face his fury. “Please Cameron, share it with me. After all you and I have been through together, let me help you.”

Silence seeped from the walls.

“You chose this place to do this?” he said. “God, you’re infuriating.”

“It reminded me of the cell you imprisoned me in,” I said softly.

“That was different.”

“How?”

Cameron reached out for the wall and turned, leaning against it. “I flew to Afghanistan to assist with the rescue of an officer. A captain in military intelligence.” Cameron closed his eyes. “The officer had been captured by local militia. I flew out there to be part of the debriefing team upon his extraction.”

“Why did it have to be you?” I said softly.

His eyelids lowered as if he’d found himself back there, in that place of remembering.

“Cameron?”

He shook his head, as though coming round from a thought. “Other prisoners who were released before him relayed he’d experienced a mental breakdown. He’d been tortured to the brink of death.”

Oh, I’d not expected this.

And from the way Cameron glared at me, he knew it too. “Before he was captured, he obtained intel. The kind that would lead to saving thousands of lives back in the States.”

“You were chosen because of your special skills at extracting subconscious information?”

“Following the officer’s extraction, I was required to access his mind with expedience. We were against the clock.”

A door slammed and it made me jump.

Cameron remained still, distant, unaffected. “I bulldozed into the officer’s subconscious.” His gaze met mine. “You’re probably wondering if the intel proved worth it? I’ll never know.”

“Why?”

“A need to know basis.”

“What happened to the officer?”

Cameron measured his words. “I decimated his psyche.”

I brought my hands up to my mouth.

“And I was called a fucking hero,” he said.

“But you saved all those lives?”

“Did I?”

“Doesn’t Shay know?”

“Shay?”

“He cares deeply for you.”

“He’s also fired.”

“No, don’t.” I stepped forwards and took Cameron’s hand. “Fire me instead.”

“Once we go back to L.A. you’ll return to Enthrall.”

There was no revelation there.

“You once told me I was starting out with a squeaky wheel,” I said. “You told me I needed to forgive myself. Perhaps if you forgive yourself—”

“Key.” Cameron pulled his hand from mine and flicked his fingers.

I reached into his pocket and gave it to him.

He closed his eyes.

“Just like the mind,” I said. “It’s always right there.”

“Mia, I know you mean well. I’ve gone over this story a million times. All I’m left with is reliving hell.” Cameron turned the key and pulled open the door.

“I’m sorry.” Self hate welled and I regretted my stupidity. “This is my fault. You’re right. I shouldn’t have pressed you. I’m a ridiculous specimen.”

He pulled me into a hug. “No, Mia. You’re everything that is beautiful in this world. You are my way of forgetting. My refuge. My freedom.” He rubbed his face with his hand. “Our time together has been good for me.”

“You’ll find love, Cameron. You deserve to find someone special.”

He stared at me for the longest time. “It’s a challenge when you refuse to even love yourself, Mia. That’s the issue. It’s no real mystery.”

“Oh Cameron.” I hugged him tighter.

“Happy now?” He took in a deep breath. “I’m a complete and utter bastard. And now you know.”

“You did it to save lives.”

“I betrayed a war hero. Instead of bringing him home and letting him recover in a nurturing, calm environment, I kept him out there in the desert in a filthy, sand filled tent.”

“Everyone who knows you loves you.”

He gave the softest sigh. “You were the first woman who made me forget my ugliness. Your sweetness, your innocence, your unending forgiveness. This is why you’re perfect for Richard.”

“You did what you thought was right.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Cameron, I want to take away your pain like you did mine.”

“You were innocent, Mia. What happened to you wasn’t your fault. For me it’s different. Pain also serves as a punishment.”

A shadow appeared just outside the door. The tour guide had returned. “Did you see everything you wanted?” he said.

“Yes, thank you,” said Cameron. “I believe my friend here has seen the worst of the monsters. Quite a lasting impression, I’m sure.”

“Cameron.” I looked up at him. “No.”

“I can still taste the sand,” he whispered.

CHAPTER 10

SHAY PICKED UP on Cameron’s tension.

Back in the Rolls, he gave me a questioning frown, but I turned my face away, too guilty to look at him and feeling like I’d visited hell myself.

Not only had I reminded Cameron of the pain he’d buried deep, and ruined a perfectly lovely day, I’d let Cameron know it had been Shay who’d tipped me off about Afghanistan.

The ride through London was icy, but it was colder in here.

I reached for Cameron’s hand.

He gave mine a reassuring squeeze, though he continued to stare out, his frown deepening.

“Lover’s tiff?” said Shay.

“Except that Mia’s not my lover,” said Cameron, his glare turning on me. “She’s a submissive in training. She needs to remember that.”

I withdrew my hand from his, mortified.

A sign for Chelsea Crescent was followed by a long row of white stucco-fronted houses curving around the slim road, with black fencing all matching and the long row of trees perfectly trimmed.

“Those are pretty earrings,” said Shay, glancing over at Cameron.

Cameron arched a brow at him.

Tension returned.

“When it snows,” said Shay, breaking through the silence, “this place looks like a Christmas card.”

“When will it snow?” I asked.

“January, maybe,” said Shay.

“More likely February, sir,” our driver called back to us.

We’d be missing the snow, but not the rain. The weather had turned even colder and the sky darkened. Grey clouds sat low and threatened to pour.

A flash of thunder sounded way off.

The moody weather reflected Cameron’s current state. He looked tortured, unreachable, that sternness having returned with no hint of lifting. He let me hold his hand but refused to look at me, keeping his eyes on the road ahead.

The car parked outside one of the houses. All three of us headed into number twenty-three.

This place was cozy and much bigger once you were inside. Decorated in true British fashion, with couches and big armchairs, and books everywhere. The back wall of the living room was naked brick. Black and white prints hung on the wall, all of them depicting city life. They reminded me of the ones in Richard’s office.

I followed Cameron into the living room, trying to think of words to placate him.

“We’ll be staying here for a couple of days,” he said, flicking on lights here and there.

He removed his coat and hung it on the rack in the entranceway. He eased mine off my shoulders and hung it next to his. Shay threw his onto the big leather couch.

Cameron walked through the open plan kitchen until he found what he was looking for. He dished out a couple of aspirin to Shay, who apparently wasn’t joking about his headache.

“Have I fucked up?” asked Shay.

I was too embarrassed to admit it was me that had.

Cameron screwed the lid back onto the pill bottle.

Shay looked fraught. “Speak to me.”

“It’s my fault,” I blurted.

“I’m going to take a shower,” said Cameron.

“Is it because I expressed concern for your safety?” said Shay. “About you stepping out publically?”

Cameron leaned on the counter. “You want to do this now?”

“Yes,” said Shay. “I hate you being pissed at me.”

“Go take a look around, Mia,” said Cameron.

I folded my arms across my chest. “As your executive assistant, I believe I should stay.”

Cameron’s stare stayed on me.

A chill spiraled up my spine, but I refused to back down. Shay was in trouble because of me.

Cameron’s focus settled back on Shay. “You talked to Mia about Afghanistan.”

Shay swapped a wary glance with me. “Only mentioned that’s where we met.”

“Cameron, you told me you met in England?” I said in Shay’s defense. “At a polo match?”

“Technically,” said Cameron.

“It was the first time we got to talk openly about our lifestyles,” said Shay. “As you can imagine, bringing up your interest in BDSM is not a common discussion in a war zone.”

“What were you thinking?” said Cameron to him.

“I’m sorry. You trusted me to keep your private life private.”

“Tell him how many lives were saved,” I said to Shay. “He needs to know what he did was worth it.”

Shay glared at me. “Haven’t you done enough damage?”

“Mia, go and explore,” said Cameron.

“This is my fault,” I said. “I want to make it right.”

“Go and unpack, Mia,” said Shay. “I put your suitcase in your room. Last door down. Check it out.”

Cameron threw me a reassuring smile on my way out.

It didn’t help.

The floorboards creaked when I went up the stairs, and I made a mental note to ask Cameron how old this place was. The banister was carved in wood with old scratches along it revealing its age. This place had an elegant yet well worn feel. Listening for any sign of an argument downstairs, and ready to head back and jump in if Shay needed me, I continued on up.

I found my suitcase placed in the corner of a small bedroom. The bed was big enough for one.

Zipping open the suitcase, I found my Hello Kitty makeup bag and pulled out my contraceptives. Even on this new time zone, I’d perfected popping these pills.

I went in search of the room with Cameron’s case.

The simple, yet high ceilinged room with dark wood everything gave Cameron’s space a Victorian feel. The décor had an old world feel to it. I’d stepped back in time to a simpler era.

Back on the ground level, using a rear hallway so as not to disturb them, I found more rooms. That old world feel was a common theme. Farther down was an office. There was a pantry in the back with a large selection of wines and a good selection of packets and boxes with lavish labels, all proving even here Cameron loved his little luxuries.

Peering out the back window, I could see the garden was small but beautifully tended. The stairs leading to the basement were too tempting not to investigate. Descending slowly, careful of my footing, I creaked my way down.

I’d found the room.

All the fixtures were in chrome: the Saint Andrew’s Cross, the wall secured contraptions in which the dominant tied his submissive. My breath caught when I saw the line of whips, chains, and paddles resting on chrome shelving.

My heart skipped a beat when I imagined us spending time in here. That familiar tingle of excitement bloomed, along with that low lying ache that made me swoon when I thought of him.

If his mood ever lifted.

Maybe he’d punish me in here and all would be forgiven.

There, on the floor, a tiny object caught the light. I went over to take a better look. An uneasy feeling hit me as I picked up the diamond earring. A sub had lost this during a session. My mind went there, wondering if Cameron had fucked her before or after she’d lost it. Their sex so fierce that her jewelry became a casualty of their breathtaking tussle.

My stomach wrenched with the thought of him touching someone else.

Had he been here last night with her?

Don’t.

Don’t do this to yourself.

You’re just another submissive to him. This is the universe making it easier to give him up.

Taking a few more seconds, I leaned against the wall, self examining my reaction to this dreadful clue. It would all be over soon.
Ironically, the one man who could talk me off this emotional ledge was the man pushing me towards it.

I made my way back to the living room.

Cameron was alone.

Wondering how the chat with Shay had gone, I studied Cameron. He’d put out three mugs, dropped a teabag into each one, and poured boiling water into them. He seemed to be ignoring me.

With my own drama unfolding, I thought I’d join him halfway in his current standoff.

I placed the earring on the countertop. “Found your playroom.”

Cameron gazed down at the earring.

“It’s okay,” I said, more for me then him. “All part of getting over each other.”

“Throw it away.” He pointed to the trash can.

“Not that I know anything about diamonds, but it’s at least a couple of carats. Maybe you should return it to her?”

He picked up the earring, moved over to the trash, and threw it in.

There’d been a time in my life when that diamond might have fed my family for weeks. Jealousy won out and I was happy it was in there.

“Did she lose it last night?” I watched his reaction.

Cameron washed his hands under the tap. “There was no one here last night.” He looked over at me. “Come here.”

I relented, allowing him to pull me in front of him and wash my hands with his under the running water. My back to his front. His body was warm and welcoming against mine as strong fingers lathered the soap, as though manipulating me to forget what I’d just found.

Almost.

“Don’t tell me it’s your mother’s?” I feigned amusement.

“As long as it’s not my father’s.” He planted a kiss to my shoulder.

I twisted in his arms to look up at him. “I know that after me there’ll be a slew of girls trained by the great Cameron Cole.”

He dried my hands with a tea towel. “They’ll never be another Mia.”

“What I’m trying to say is, I’ll make it easy for you. I promise.”

Cameron held my gaze. “I would never intentionally hurt you, you know that, right?”

“I know.”

Cameron still hadn’t replied with the accustomed lie of ‘earring girl meant nothing.’

Words I desperately needed to hear.

He broke away and put the milk back in the fridge.

“Cameron—”

“You’re still on L.A. time,” he said. “You need to take a nap.”

This place was so big and creaky, getting any sleep here was going to be a challenge. Unless I got to sleep beside him. We still had hours of light left before I’d know if that was in my future. Surely if we were to spend all our time together it would include sharing a bed tonight.

I let out a wistful sigh.

Shay came back in and didn’t look at all shaken from his verbal smackdown with Cameron. Another remarkable trait of Cameron, with his chastisement over there’d be no sulking, no lingering tension, and no ill will. He had a way of moving on and forgiving.

Shay’s expression changed to excitement. “Richard has a Sony Short Throw.” He walked over to the far wall and tapped a long silver box. “Wall projection TV.”

Cameron froze.

Shay’s revelation seeped into my brain and my stare drifted over to the trash can. This was Richard’s place. He hadn’t traveled here since I’d known him, so there was no hint of cheating, but that didn’t soften the blow.

“Let me know if you’d rather stay in tonight and I’ll set you up with a movie,” said Shay.

“I’m undecided,” said Cameron. “We use this place all the time, don’t we Shay?”

Shay looked confused. “I thought this was your first—”

Cameron glared at him.

Shay’s eyes darted to me. “Oh yeah, all the time.”

“I’m taking a shower,” said Cameron.

Shay’s stare followed Cameron to the door. “So we’re still good then?”

Cameron gave him a smile. “Keep her safe and we’re good.”

He left the room, leaving Shay and me wallowing in our uncomfortable silence.

My thoughts found their way back to that earring. That small, shiny proof that Richard had taken a woman down there and probably done things to her he refused to do to me.

Richard insisted Cameron train me for him, but I still hadn’t lost my feisty side with a tendency to snap back. If I was meant to be primed into a perfect sub who obeyed every order, I was way off. Maybe Cameron was saving the best for last.

Arousal curled between my thighs at that thought.

My focused drifted to the sink. That washing of hands had felt like a lifeline back into Cameron’s favor. I breathed a sigh of relief.

The fact Richard had a permanent fuckpad in London was disconcerting. Having never dated anyone before either of these two guys, I didn’t have my own escapades to compare with theirs and soften the blow of girlfriends past.

“When was the last time Richard was here?” I asked Shay.

“A few months,” he said. “I thought you knew he had a house here?”

“No. I didn’t.”

“Well then it’s a nice surprise.”

It was a surprise all right. “I discovered his playroom.”

Shay smirked. “Cole didn’t touch his tea.”

I reached for mine, removed the teabag, and threw it in that same trash can that earring was in.

Warming my hands around the mug, I said, “He makes great tea.”

“How are you holding up?” said Shay. “I’m sure this whole Lance thing will be behind you soon.”

“Haven’t had much time to think about it.”

Shay’s stare held mine.

“Things feel a little complicated.” I tried to find the words.

“You’re the main focus of the two top doms at Chrysalis,” he said. “It doesn’t get any better.”

“I’ve fallen for them both.”

“You and everyone else.” He removed his teabag, threw it away, and took a sip of tea.

“I want them both to be happy.”

“They seem happy to me.”

“I’ve fallen for Cameron.”

“Of course you have,” said Shay flatly. “He’s easy to fall for.”

“I’m worried about him.”

“Whoa, chill out.” He shook his head. “Look, soon Richard will be here and you’ll take up your position as his sub.”

“What about Cameron?”

“Nothing fazes him.”

“So all this time I’ve spent with him means nothing?”

“Oh, Mia, you do have it bad, don’t you?” Shay shrugged. “If it makes it any easier, he’s looking forward to handing you back.”

“He told you that?”

“You’ve excelled Cole’s expectations. He’s proud of the results. Richard will be getting back a well trained slave. Remember, your behavior reflects on Cameron.”

I stored that away in the part of my brain reserved for ‘what the fuck’ moments. “How long before Cameron will take on another sub?” I said.

“Actually, something tells me he’s ready to date again.” He shrugged. “Just an observation.”

“That’s good,” I stuttered. “I’m sure he’ll find a nice woman in no time.”

“The caliber he demands only comes from a woman of good breeding.”

My breath stilted.

“You know what I mean. A woman who matches his status. High class. A similar social background.”

I took a sip of tea and forced myself to swallow it.

Shay set his mug down. “Cameron’s standards are extraordinarily high.”

“Yes, I’ve had the pleasure of seeing that first hand.”

“Then you’ll know his taste runs too dark for a girl like you.”

“Like me?”

He gave a nod. “Yes. You’re better kept out of the limelight. Better suited to sitting quietly at your master’s feet. Think about where you’ve come from. People like us are destined to serve. We enjoy the fun from the sidelines. Do yourself a favor and get with the program.”

“Program?”

“You’re their plaything.” He looked surprised. “You didn’t actually believe Cameron would ever consider dating you, Mia?”

“I hadn’t actually gone there.” My voice sounded scratchy.

“Oh Mia, surely you know Cameron’s way out of your league.” Shay finished his tea in three gulps. “I’m not telling you this to hurt you. I happen to think you’re a really sweet girl. Don’t want to see you get hurt.” He lowered his stare. “The sooner you realize you’re a temporary distraction, the better it will be for you.”

“Cameron told me how special I am to him.”

“So damn cute.” Shay followed that up with a tap to my nose. “You’re a gorgeous fucktoy for the rich.”

A lump wedged in my throat.

All those beautiful words Cameron had spoken came flooding back. His staking a claim as my master, his words of affection as he shared his joy of possessing me, the way he held my hand, kissed me, made love to me…

Those two glorious days I’d spent in his Beverly Hills home when he’d all but stated his love.

I’d read each and every sign wrong.

Pressing my hand against my chest, I willed myself to stop loving, pull back from caring so much, giving myself over willingly like the wanton slut I’d become.

“Oh by the way, thanks for stabbing me in the back, Mia,” he said, yanking open the dishwasher and placing his mug inside. He held out his hand for mine.

I handed it to him. “I’m sorry.”

“How did he react when you brought up his time in the Middle East?”

“It still causes him a lot of pain.” That gut wrenching misery of seeing his face so tortured came flooding back. “I feel so bad.”

“You and me both.”

“Do you think he’s still angry with me?”

Shay stood up and neared me. “It’s because I like you I’m telling you this.”

I gave a nod, grateful for any insight.

He gripped my shoulders. “If you don’t start acting appropriately, what reason will Cameron have to keep you around?”

My body stiffened, and a wave of lightheadedness washed over me.

Shay stepped back and folded his arms. “And what reason will Richard have to take you back?”

“Because they like me?” That sounded ridiculous.

And Shay scoffed to prove it.

“No, we’re meant to be acting normal,” I told him. “Dr. Finley advised me and Cameron to try hanging out together like we’re dating.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Shay looked astonished. “You aiming to get yourself sent back to L.A. on the next plane outta here?”

Lowering my head, I went quiet.

Was submitting to Cameron Cole the only thing I was good for?

Fearing there was truth in Shay’s words, and unable to conceive of never seeing Cameron again, all resistance left me.

“You’re in a very privileged position,” said Shay. “Stop taking advantage.”

Somehow, that storm had made its way in here.

“Where’s your master now, Ms. Lauren?”

“Upstairs,” I muttered. “Taking a shower.”

He gave an obvious glare.

CHAPTER 11

MAKING MY WAY up the creaking staircase, I marveled at how easy it was to both hate Shay and like him at the same time.

Despite this nagging feeling I shouldn’t let him affect me like this, I’d fallen prey to his advice. My self-esteem had run off somewhere, perhaps never to be recovered, and the damage to my heart was irrevocable.

I really was stupid sometimes to the point of embarrassing.

Cameron’s world consisted of invites to palaces, polo matches with the social elite, helicopter flights, grand trips on private planes to foreign cities, while staying in luxury five star everything hotels, and boundless beauties waiting on his every word. The kind of women who belonged on catwalks and had a head full of Harvard.

I was a low class girl from Charlotte, who dreamed of becoming a fashion designer. A pipe dream humored by everyone.

All I had to do was open my mouth and my lack of class came spilling out. This Southern Belle was still learning the art of not making a fool of herself in public, and doing a crappy job at that.

Cameron showed such tolerance. Shay’s warning that his patience might be running out was not so far off. After our trip to the tower and my misplaced meddling, Cameron’s attitude towards me had shifted towards annoyance.

This chemistry between us was all one way. Shay had a point. I’d invented a lie, invested in my own fantasy, and come up with an unrealistic reality. Shay had probably saved me from myself.

Right now, home seemed so far away. My relationship with Richard seemed distorted. Maybe the time difference was addling my brain and making it hard to think straight.

Nervous about facing Cameron again, and wondering if he’d forgiven me for my snooping into his past, I tiptoed toward his room.

I cursed the door for creaking open.

Cameron stood in the master bedroom and stared out the window. His hair was wet from the shower, a towel was wrapped around his waist, and his broad shoulders were on view.

“Hello, sir,” I whispered nervously.

Cameron turned to face me.

Sucking my bottom lip, I wondered what to say, where to begin. The awkwardness rose.

“How about a massage?” He pointed to the bottle on the side table.

He looked full of melancholy, his handsome features drawn with tension. I hated it had been me who’d sent him into this mood.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “Forgive me.”

“For what?”

“My big mouth. I’m apologizing for opening it.”

“I love your mouth,” he said, as though coming out of a trance.

That old fantasy came rushing back.

He shook his head. “It’s very fuckable.”

There it was. That straight talking from my master.

“I want to please you, sir.” Kicking off my shoes, I walked over to the side table, picked up the bottle, and tried to turn the cap.

He held out his hand for it.

“I’ve got it.” I unscrewed the top and took a sniff. It smelt nice. Earthy with delicate spices. I gestured for him to lie down.

Inwardly, I cringed. If Shay had been the one to buy it for him, he’d know what we were up to. I pushed that thought away.

And patted the bed for Cameron to lie down.

“I’m going to massage you,” said Cameron, breaking into a smile.

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

He looked confused.

“What I meant was.” I chose my words carefully. “I’m meant to be pleasing you, sir.”

“Oh for goodness sake, Mia, take off your clothes and get on the bed.” He came quickly to my side, grabbed a lock of hair, and curled it around his hand, making my scalp tingle. “Don’t try to derail my plan to spoil you, missy.”

Standing there, a little surprised at the speed with which he undressed me, my arms went up to assist with the extraction of my blouse. I lowered them again for the removal of my bra, then I stepped out of my skirt and panties, before he threw them on the nearby chair.

Naked, I dropped to my feet in a position of submission.

“Up,” he demanded. “Obey.”

A hard spank to my bare ass made me scramble onto the bed and lay flat on my stomach. Heart beating hard, my head spun from Shay’s revelation I was merely a plaything.

The bed dipped as Cameron climbed next to me.

With my face buried in the pillow, I melted at the touch of his strong hands pummeling my shoulders, working out the tension with the oil.

Make the most of it, my muse insisted. It’s not every day you get a massage from a totally hot guy. The hottest guy on the planet.

“Relax your fingers.” He eased my grip off. “You’re holding onto the blanket like I’m going to hurt you. This is about pleasure.” He nuzzled into my ear. “We need this.”

My head swooned and I gripped the duvet again; half out of anticipation, half out of fear this was going to be the best massage of my life and my heart was going to find us in this room and scream to be owned by him all over again.

As though I’d ever gotten my heart back from him.

“What’s going on inside your head?” His fingers worked their way down my spine, circling. “Forget what happened. I have. Savor the memory of us sharing that cake in Harrods. You eating more than me and trying to take my eye out with your fork for that last piece.”

I relaxed a little.

His hands paused on my lower back. “Is everything all right, Mia?”

I crooked my neck to look at him. “Do I still please you, sir?”

“Always.”

“I know my place,” I whispered. “I’m very happy with it.”

“Why are you suddenly so submissive?” He titled my chin up to look at him.

My head was going to explode.

“Where’s my feisty Mia?”

“Being good.”

“Oh, so you want that kind of massage?” His fingers roved toward my buttocks and sunk into my flesh.

I was too thrown to correct him.

God, it felt good.

Surrendering to my fate had an upside.

I lay like that for what felt like an hour, drifting in and out, marveling at Cameron’s ability to not get bored with spoiling me with his affection. He was close, that’s all that mattered, and I sucked back this well of emotion.

When asked to turn over, a shot of excitement mixed with shyness.

Eyes closed, too embarrassed to look at him, I melted into the circle of eight he masterfully maintained across my breasts. His fingertips caught my nipples as he went. Trying to keep my trembling at bay, and not moan wantonly, I again clutched the bedsheet—

My mind, my body, plummeted into the abyss.

When his hands began that steady rhythm between my thighs, his fingertips brushing my sex in a sensuous tease, I arched my back.

“Relax,” he said, easing my thighs apart. “Go with it.”

Firmly, and with fresh oil on his warm hands, he expertly caressed my sex, sweeping up and sweeping up again, stroking me, and at long last finding my clit as he stroked and teased me there. Climbing ever higher, my breaths short and sharp, I rose toward the pinnacle, thighs shaking, waiting for those words of permission I’d silently chanted.

“You may come,” he said, carrying my climax ever higher. That slow steady fondling sent me hurtling into the center of nothingness. Blinding pleasure stole my breath. My soft cries were barely controllable.

When I opened my eyes again, he was still stroking me there—

His gaze hypnotically held mine. “I never want to stop touching you,” he said, burying two fingers inside me, simulating deep thrusts. His thumb circled my clit with a steady rhythm. “You look so enraptured when you come, Mia.”

My head crashed down onto the pillow.

Lips trembling, I remembered what felt like love was merely Cameron’s way to pass the time. His words were empty, meaningless, a game.

The truth owned this moment.

Richard only let me come with his permission. This was Cameron’s way of acclimating me for when he gave me back to him, preparing this ridiculous sub to be returned to her original master. Despite this feeling wrong, my body rebelled and went with him, another orgasm drawing me closer, tearing through my body, my back arching, thoughts scattering.

Racked with pleasure.

My long moan of wanton desire proved his claim.

As I lay quiet, his fingers now traced up and down my thigh. His subtle smile held satisfaction.

Like that diamond earring, I was destined to be thrown away.

Shay’s words haunted me. “You’re a fucktoy for the rich.”

A passing distraction.

“You’re their plaything.” Shay had spoken it as though I really should know this.

The slap I gave Cameron across his face felt like an out of body experience.

We both stared at each other, him shocked I’d struck him and me just as startled. He touched his palm against his cheek. My hand stung like fire so his face had to as well.

“This was meant to be serene,” he said. “Intimate.”

I wanted to say sorry, but all I could do was stare in fear that he didn’t love me. I hated him for not loving me. And I hated me for wanting so much of him when I deserved so little.

Cameron leaned forwards, his fingers wrapping around my throat, the pressure on my neck light but threatening. “Is this what you want?”

Filled with panic, I gripped his wrists.

He lifted his hand. “You’re sending me mixed messages, Mia. Use words.”

“I’m not your fucktoy.”

He blinked under long dark lashes.

“I mean it,” I said.

“An hour long massage for my beloved minx proves that,” he said flatly.

Clever Cameron speak sent my mind into a full on doubt-fest. His intellect was able to get him whatever he wanted and make me think it was a good idea.

Even if the massage had been pretty damn fantastic.

“Tell me what you need,” he said.

I want you to love me.

“You’re not my master,” I snapped. “No one is.”

His eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Yes, I am.”

My eyelids betrayed me and fluttered shut. His dominance stole me back to his ownership, sending a shiver all over. Talk about mixed messages. My mind was screaming at me to get the hell out of the room, yet my body spoke the language of submission. He’d stolen my heart and stashed it away somewhere I’d never be able to find it.

“Admit you’re mine.” His hand found its way back to my throat.

The pressure caused ripples of spiraling excitement. My nipples hardened as though not understanding my rebellion was real.

Wide eyed, I watched him climb off the bed and grab a tie from the top of the dresser. He turned to face me, his cock erect.

He came at me fast—

Despite my resistance, and a near bite to his arm, he secured my wrists together above my head and secured me to the headboard.

“You want dangerous?” He slapped my thigh. “I’ll reign in your disobedience.”

“Untie me,” I yelled.

He rolled on a condom and scrambled back onto the bed with another tie in his hand.

Straddling me, his fingers worked fast to weave it around my mouth, then he tied the knot behind my head. I tasted him on the material, and the edges of my lips pulled taut. His scent burst into my nostrils and fired off this primal desire.

My arousal caused invisible sparks. I squirmed with need.

The more I fought him, the more turned on I became. My gasps, heard through the material, revealed this.

Trying to push him off, I kicked with my legs, but he was too strong, too in control, too fierce. He flipped me over and lifted my butt high and spanked me hard. I yelped through my gag.

My head down, my thighs spread with my ass in the air, I again gave myself completely to him. Cameron’s arms wrapped around me, his cruel fingers grabbing my breasts and pinching my nipples, sending bursts of delicious pangs low.

A muffled groan escaped me.

He thrust himself deep, stretching me with pleasure and causing me to flinch and shudder.

My thoughts ran off with themselves, creating scenarios of our future, me stealing glimpses of him, him barely noticing his once sub.

My sobs were softened by the gag.

Cameron reached around between my thighs, his fingers finding my clit, his expert flicking a masterful touch. At the same time, he pounded into me with unforgiving thrusts, his grunts of passion revealing he was gone from me, too caught up, and closing in on his own bliss.

Cars passed beneath the window. A door slammed somewhere far off.

The outside world disappeared…

My body melted against his. My fingers grasped the headboard and held on tight, needing this to never end.

Rising out of our struggle, our climaxes caught hold with that perfect promise of ecstasy only Cameron could bring. We both came hard, screaming through our orgasms, our bodies rocking in perfect union.

He stilled behind me. “Mia.”

We collapsed on the bed.

He lay by my side.

When he finally got round to untying me and removed my gag, I leaped up from the bed, picked up the pillow, and threw it at him. Feathers burst out, spiraling above us then raining down and covering him.

He blew a feather off his face.

And laughed, brushing feathers out his hair, looking unusually boyish. “Not sure this is what Dr. Finely had in mind.”

“Fuck Finely.” I scurried out, buck naked and not caring, heading down the stairs and through the living room, relieved Shay was nowhere to be seen.

If Cameron wanted a high-class girl, he could fricken well have her. I was never going to be that no matter how many tennis lessons I had, or how many hours I spent with Samantha Harding, etiquette educator extraordinaire.

Oh no. Like a lightning bolt, I remembered the warning I’d been given about Cameron.

Cameron’s fetish was to chase, catch, and fuck.

Right now I was acting out his number one fantasy as my feet carried me down the stairs and into the BDSM playroom.

You couldn’t have chosen the pantry? my muse berated.

Bare feet pounded the hardwood floor behind me.

This was a man who ran ten miles every morning and finished off his workout in an Olympic size pool with a zillion laps—

So it was no surprise to see him behind me.

“Come here.” He stood inside the door of the playroom not even out of breath, his hand reaching out to me.

I shook my head.

His gorgeous nakedness was all lean muscle and rippling abs. “Let’s go back to bed for a while,” he said.

My back hit the Saint Andrew’s Cross.

“We can’t stay here,” he said calmly.

“You go first.”

“Mia, we’re meant to be vanilla only, remember?”

“That wasn’t vanilla.” I pointed upwards.

“No, but you ignite passion in me and it’s hard to suppress my nature.” He gestured for me to come to him. “Come on, sweetie pie.”

I leaned against back against the Saint Andrew’s Cross.

He slipped into a smile. “I ran it through my brain and it sounded cute.”

I was too terrified to dive into this fantasy and not be able to find my way back.

“What’s making you so antsy?” he said.

I’d already thrown Shay under the bus once today and it had been one of those big fat double-deckers. Despite how much grief Shay caused, he didn’t deserve a second round of betrayal.

“Have I ever given you a reason to doubt my affection for you?” he said.

“You’re always so good to me.”

“I pushed you too hard?”

“I liked it.”

“Why did you slap me?”

Sucking my lip, I tried to brave the words that hurt not to say.

“Do you not like London?” he said.

“I love London.”

“Okay, good.” He waved it off. “There’s this great restaurant in Park Lane—”

“I’m not sure my heart can take any more.”

“Of what?”

“You.” My hand swept through my hair and got caught in a post-fucked knot. “I’ve fallen madly in love with you.”

He lowered his hand to his side.

CHAPTER 12

CASCADING WATER POURED over us.

The shower was warm and refreshing as we lathered each other with luxury soap. Cameron reached for the shampoo and massaged my scalp with the exotic smelling liquid, working it into a froth in my hair.

Pressing my lips against Cameron’s firm chest, I gave him a much needed hug. I willed myself to get closer and I breathed him in, wishing we could linger like this forever.

“Dr. Finley was right,” he said. “You have been good for me.”

Wiping water from my eyes, I looked up at him.

Cameron hadn’t mentioned my exclamation of love from ten minutes ago, down in that playroom. He’d merely swept me up into his arms and carried me in here.

“And Mia, I know I’ve been good for you,” he said.

“You are.” I stared up at him pleadingly, needing him to admit his feelings.

A veil of steam surrounded us.

“Let’s use this trust you have for me to take you to the next level,” he said softly.

“Next level?”

He gave a nod, reached for the sponge, and gestured for me to turn around.

With my back to his front, I splayed my hands on the glass, hanging on his every word.

“I need you to be honest with me, Mia.”

“I will.”

“Have you changed your mind about becoming a sub?”

“No, I want it more than ever.”

“How far into our world are you willing to go?”

“How do you mean?”

“A true submissive trusts her master to know what is best for her.”

“I know. You always make good decisions for me.”

“So?”

“Sir,” I whispered. “I’m ready.”

My mind drifted to being auctioned off back at Chrysalis and the world of trouble that had caused. Though Richard couldn’t have predicted how wrong it would go.

“Seriously consider what you want.” He swept the sponge low over my back. “If you desire to become completely subjugated then we must fine tune your behavior over the next few hours we have left. Prepare you for the final surrender.”

A tremble of pleasure between my thighs caused me to shiver.

“There are expectations that need to be met,” he said. “You understand?”

“I think so.”

“Richard demands you obey his every command.”

I turned around to better see Cameron, needing to explore what this might mean for us.

Cameron circled his finger in a gesture for me to turn again. I complied, splaying my fingers on the glass and peering out at the bathroom.

Enthrall’s garden came to mind, and Cameron’s warning as he sat beside me on the bench; Richard demanded a malleable submissive. The carp had swum leisurely in the pond before us. A cool breeze had kissed my skin. Cameron’s honesty left nothing unsaid.

During those few minutes we’d chatted under the midday sun, Cameron had shared with me that, as a master, he was more lenient than Richard. A fact I’d had trouble believing at the time. I’d had an all-consuming desire back then to become Richard’s lover and hadn’t understood our conversation. Though I realized now. Richard was so hardcore he’d even been willing to let another train me.

Everything since that day had changed.

And so had I.

With all these lessons Cameron had given me, I’d emerged anew, born out of a cocoon of enlightenment. All these new experiences changed my world view, and my view of me. The master tasked with my training had become my obsession. I wondered if there was any way of reversing these feelings and finding perfection in my Richard again.

It was time for honesty.

“You made me believe you feel the same way about me back at L’Ermitage,” I said. “Cameron, you know you did.”

He hesitated.

My body tensed. “All those things you told me.”

His fingers curled in my hair. “Can’t remember them now.”

Resting my forehead against the glass, I tried to soothe this ache.

I regretted sharing my feelings with him.

“This was always a temporary arrangement,” he said. “We made that very clear to you, Mia.”

“I know.”

“Are you willing to be everything Richard needs you to be?” he asked. “You’re meant for Richard. A fact I need you to remember.”

“Can you?”

The sponge paused on my back.

“I’ve made an art out of forgetting,” he murmured.

“Is this the only way I’ll still get to see you.” I turned to look at him. “Cameron, will I still get to see you?”

“When your master permits.”

“This is so…” My hand pressed against his chest.

“Our time together will be held as one of my dearest memories. Remember what I’ve taught you and forget the rest.” A glimpse of sadness, but it quickly lifted. “You bring out a gentler version of me.” He leaned forward and kissed my cheek. “You’re used to a sterner me.”

I fell into another hug.

Him calling me sweetie pie back in the dungeon made me smile. “I like you having a pet name for me.”

“I misspoke.”

I raised my face to look at him.

“A lapse on my part.”

“Cameron?”

He placed two fingers on my lips. “Let go and surrender.”

“What about Dr. Finley’s advice about us spending time—”

“A miscalculation on Finley’s part. A misfire on mine.”

“How do you mean?”

“Your outburst earlier was unacceptable. Followed by your exclamation of love. You are of course mistaken.”

“I’m not.”

“Finley’s the first person to cease a therapeutic plan when the results skewer.”

“Skewer?”

“Fail.” He turned away and leaned out to touch the glass, his mind seemingly drifting. “Mistakes can be reversed. Undone.”

“How do you mean?”

His lowered gaze found me again. “Rebellion will not be tolerated.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I can’t hand you back to your master like this.”

“Cameron, please—”

“Address me as sir.”

“Don’t go cold on me again,” I burst out. “I can’t bear it.”

“My standards will not be compromised. Understand? I demand the highest level of behavior from all my dominants at Chrysalis, and our subs must obey us without hesitation.”

“Yes, sir.”

“My reputation depends on my ability to follow through on a promise. You are that promise.”

I neared him and buried my face into his chest, needing him to soothe me from his words.

“What is expected of you is your willingness to prove you can satisfy your master. Am I making myself clear?”

I clung to him, wishing his arms would wrap around me again.

“Do you have anything else to say? Other than a mistimed apology?”

“No, sir.” I stared at the water circling the drain. “I am sorry. Sorry for all of it.”

He stepped back and my life felt wrenched away.

The shower door opened and he swaggered out, grabbed a towel, and headed for the exit. Watching his displeasure tugged at my heartstrings.

Cameron turned to look at me, his expression stern. “We’ll move forward with your final session.”

“What does that involve?”

But he was already gone.

The imprint of his body against mine lingered.

I held my face up into the shower and let the water cascade over me, holding back, holding on. This emotional wasteland was no place for a girl who found it so easy to love.

He was easy to love.

But impossible to reach.

I’d done this to myself, breaking the code with useless musings over the one who trained me. My heart had run on ahead and burrowed into my master’s world, as though I belonged there.

The bathroom door flew open.

Cameron stood there glaring at me, a towel wrapped around his waist, his biceps flexing as his hands gripped either side of the doorway.

Crossing my arms over my chest to cover my nakedness, self-conscious in the wake of his fierce presence, I blinked at him through soaked lashes. He looked conflicted. His eyes roved my body and his frown deepened. The towel slipped and pooled at his feet.

The beauty of him approached--his muscular sculptured body, those broad shoulders, that mess of wet dark hair, those chestnut eyes.

He flew at me—

Into the shower, he walked. Pushing me against the glass, he cupped my face in his hands, then his lips were on mine. He grabbed my wrists and thrusts my hands up and over my head, pinning them there.

Water poured over us.

Cameron’s mouth pressed against mine. His tongue forced its way in to battle, searching, controlling. Lost in this reverie, my body shuddered. My mind scrambled to make sense of this, of him, trying to separate the truth out of the muddle of what he’d told me and what he did now. His tongue overpowered mine, explored. His lips forced mine wider in a frenzied kiss.

Cameron’s gaze burned with desire. “I’ll always watch over you.”

We stared into each other’s eyes.

“Always,” he whispered.

My nod of understanding was all the proof he seemed to need.

Again he left me standing there. This heartrending desire to be his went unfulfilled. Pressing fingertips to my lips, where I’d been branded by his passion, I knew it was over.

CHAPTER 13

A TERRIBLE CRASH came from downstairs.

With this red halter dress half on, the straps flapping at my chest, I grabbed my high heeled shoes and bolted downstairs.

Through the kitchen I padded, hearing voices a little way down the hallway. Trembling, unsure, I tiptoed down the long hall.

Cameron stood before the stairs that led down toward the dungeon. He looked agitated. Shay lingered a few feet away from him.

“I’m freefalling,” Cameron told him.

“Cole,” said Shay. “Take a breath.”

“I’m the fucking moth.”

Shay reached out and patted his back.

“Are you okay?” I called out.

Their surprised gazes shot to mine, both of them standing tall as though attempting to shake off this awkwardness.

Those creaky floorboards had failed to give me away.

Not used to seeing Cameron frazzled, my mind ran over a thousand reasons why he seemed so upset.

Looking from one to the other, I asked, “What was that noise?”

“It was nothing.” Cameron handed Shay a key.

Shay tucked it into his pocket.

“What happened?” I said.

“That’s a pretty dress,” said Shay, his arched brow a warning.

“Thank you. Cameron chose it for me.” I finished tying the halter neck and slipped on my shoes. “Have you heard from Richard?”

A silence followed, along with that fierceness coming off both of them. It burned a hole in my brain.

Dropping to my knees, my thoughts backtracked over that crash, and what Cameron meant about him feeling like a moth. Had Lance gotten to him?

I lowered my head in a bow.

Cameron neared me and rested his hand on my head. “Shay and I would like an aperitif before we leave for dinner.”

I rose and headed into the living room.

Oh jeez, Shay was joining us, and with his sternness at an all time high. Dinner with these two alpha males was going to be less than pleasurable. Goodness knows what kind of erotic tricks they’d get up to during our fine dining experience.

I circled the bar, grateful for Samantha Harding’s lessons back at Chrysalis. She’d told me champagne was a safe bet for an aperitif. I uncorked the chilled bottle of Veuve Clicquot as elegantly as possible.

Cameron and Shay joined me in the living room.

I handed them each a crystal flute filled with the bubbly and they looked happy enough with this choice. I knew well enough not to pour one for myself.

Cameron did the honors, tipping the bottle to fill a third flute for me; bubbles frothed.

“Thank you.” I took the glass, resisting gulping it down.

“You look beautiful.” Cameron admired my dress. “Extraordinarily lovely tonight.”

“Thank you, sir.” Stone faced and sipping my champagne, I pretended to take interest in their conversation about the British Labor Party compared to American Liberals, but my mind drifted to a more interesting subject.

Them—

Cameron looked dreamy in his black suit and tie, his hair a mess of perfection. Shay, with his two day scruff, looked extra rugged. Both of them dressed up gave them the easy advantage over other men. Women would give anything for the chance to be alone with these two hotties, let alone be seen out on the town with them. Throw in their worldliness and wealth and they really would be stepping out as a deadly combo. If Richard was with them, London might experience a quake.

A rift in the space-time continuum.

O’s for everyone.

Holding back on a giggle, my focus fell on them again.

Cameron and Shay were acting serious.

Their conversation had moved on to Scotland and Shay sharing with us that he could live there.

“It sounds beautiful,” I said in response to the mention of sprawling moors, ancient castles, and awesome pubs.

Shay looked surprised. “Ask permission to speak, Mia. Remember your place, please.”

“Yes, sir,” I said, with a touch of rebellion. I caught a curl of a lip that might have passed for Cameron’s amusement.

The wall these men put up between me and them was palpable. A realization hit me as I continued to admire Mr. Eye Candy and his rogue friend.

Their severity served as their way of preventing their own heartache by keeping women at arm’s length. Yes, they loved their kink, but after all Cameron had shown me, all that time spent together, I used my knowledge to advance my understanding of the human condition, along with the content I’d absorbed from the books I’d devoured when left alone in his library.

And now, seeing beyond their feigned disinterest in me, reading their body language, that crook of a brow, that twitch of a lip, a flex of a jaw, that cadence and rhythm of conversation, I saw through that masculine veil and the truth came spilling out.

They glanced my way.

Behind polite conversation, they both held a wariness of what I might do next. To them I was a feisty entity yet to be broken in, and one neither of them could control.

Unless I willingly gave myself over.

I was like one of those crazy racehorses with the ability to win the BDSM equivalent of the Triple Crown, or should things not go their way, I’d quite possibly blow up the entire race and cause nothing but disarray.

Untamable.

A challenge for Cameron. An annoyance for Richard. In need of roping in for Shay.

Drawn to Cameron’s crooked smile, I watched the way he topped up our drinks, the way he ignored me again to continue chatting about the modern marvel that was London’s skyline.

Cameron knew a lot about architecture, apparently.

He never loved you, came that cruel tease from my muse.

He never will.

Spiraling down into the worst case of blues I’d ever had, my mouth took the brunt of my disquiet as my teeth grazed my lower lip. My thoughts drifted back to our shower and Cameron’s response to my declaration of love. As though I’d delivered the worst news possible.

Dr. Finley’s challenge was now put to rest. Along with any hope Cameron and I might ever share an intimate moment again. This once affection between us was now a memory.

I envied Dr. Finely and his ability to extract what was needed from a few seconds of observation. His laser-sharp perception had even impressed Cameron. Perhaps if I’d have been in possession of this quality I might never have handed over my heart. Not that I remembered the actual moment it happened. I’d just woken up one day infatuated with this man.

A spell yet to be broken.

Cameron’s frown was directed at me.

He stepped towards me and reached for my left hand. We both stared down at the fingernail dents in my palm.

He traced a fingertip over them. “Why, look at that. You just extended your lifeline.” Cameron’s fingertip slid along. “Your heart line.”

Our eyes rose to meet each other’s and it was easy to disappear in his.

The room fell away.

This, this was home.

I was thousands of miles away from the country I’d been born and raised in, yet being with Cameron was my one true casa.

I readied my heart for his reaction.

Cameron pulled me into a hug, wrapping his arm around me while his other still held his glass. His right arm clung me to him in a tight embrace. With my eyes closed, it was impossible not to weaken. I rested my head against his chest and marveled at his ability to know exactly what I needed.

His cologne was heady.

Melting against him, I willed this moment never to end. Trepidation loomed closer with his threat of taking me the rest of the way in my training and what that meant.

“Tell me your thoughts,” he whispered, his voice low, alluring.

“I was wondering…” I glanced over at Shay.

Cameron planted a kiss to my cheek. “Yes.”

“How Dr. Finley did it?” I said. “How did he know so much about Shay from merely a glance?”

Shay looked warily at us. “Do I even want to know?”

Cameron arched a brow. “He pretty much nailed you, Shay.”

“Okay, let’s have it then?” said Shay.

“Haircut was easy,” said Cameron, resting his hand on the arch of my back. “You handed him that one. It was your obvious mindfulness, your ability to take in your surroundings, process your observations and react with alertness. Your confident air. The firm shake of your hand. The ability to decline an invitation into the house elegantly and without offense. Your wisdom to know we needed privacy.”

“How did he know he’d been in the navy?” I asked.

“Finley knew I was ex-navy?” said Shay.

“Your suit had an expensive cut, but that tug you gave your tie when you got in the car hinted you weren’t used to wearing it,” said Cameron. “The SEAL collar is easy on the throat.”

Shay brushed a hand over his head. “I’m getting a new haircut.”

He made us laugh.

Shay reached into his pocket and removed his phone. He stared at the screen, his frown deepening. “Merrill just entered Zengi.”

“Good,” said Cameron.

“We’re having dinner with Lance,” said Shay.

“What? When?” I said.

“Now,” he said.

“Richard’s tactic didn’t go down too well,” admitted Cameron.

Shay shifted uncomfortably.

“Lance just so happens to be in London,” Cameron said. “I thought we might go for a touch of diplomacy.”

“Am I going?” I said.

“Of course.” Cameron smiled. “Who’s hungry for clams?”

CHAPTER 14

TALK ABOUT A mind-fuck.

We’d gone from ferreting me out of the Savoy in the early hours, followed by a breathtaking motorbike ride across London to shake off our stalkers, to stashing me away in an officer’s club, to now, sitting opposite Lance Merrill at dinner.

Like everything was just fine.

I sat between Cameron and Shay, with Lance sitting opposite. Our conversation was pleasant enough, as though we were just three Americans enjoying London’s nightlife and I wasn’t a wide eyed submissive dangled before the scariest lion in the den. Though Richard called them dragons and I could see why.

Lance rested back casually, oozing power in his black pinstriped suit, his arms outstretched on either side of the leather seat in our private booth.

Zengi was one of those swanky restaurants with close fitting tables and a wealthy clientele, judging from the lack of prices on the menu. The chatter of English accents mixed with the clang of knives and forks and soft classical music playing.

“How are you enjoying London?” asked Cameron.

“Love the city,” said Lance. “You?”

“We’re having a blast,” said Cameron, turning over the menu. “Highly recommend the oysters.”

“If the recommendation comes from you,” said Lance, “I know they’re good. How about you, Shay? See anything you wouldn’t mind swallowing whole?”

“Still deciding,” said Shay, pointing to my menu. “Mia?”

“I like swordfish,” I told him.

Cameron nudged my arm. “Why not go for something you’ve never tried, like haggis?”

“From Scotland.” I beamed at Shay. “What’s in that?”

“The trick with haggis,” said Shay, “is to eat it first and ask questions later.”

He made me giggle and I almost forgot we were dining with the enemy.

“May I?” Cameron held up the wine list.

With a nod of permission, Cameron chose a 1972 bottle of Desmond Prue, followed by words of approval from Lance. He’d picked the best bottle, apparently.

Despite the suggestion of haggis, I went for the clams in garlic sauce, as recommended by Cameron. He chose the same. Shay ordered haggis and was eager to have me taste it. Lance went for a foreign sounding dish with lamb.

Red wine flowed.

The food was delicious.

A second bottle of wine was ordered.

The conversation went from oil prices, Lance’s latest vacay in Dubai with his wife, to the benefits of having a driver and not having to tackle London traffic. Which I’d discovered was even worse than Los Angeles, if such a thing were possible.

I drifted in and out of their chatter, thinking back to my early days of working at Enthrall and about all that had transpired since. It really was worth journaling about. Especially this new experience of visiting London. I hoped I’d be able to remember every detail so I could tell Bailey all about it. I’d leave out this bit though, me eating dinner at an upscale restaurant with Lance.

That small taste of haggis off Shay’s plate was delicious. Much to his amusement, I stole another bite. We evened out my mischief with him stealing several clams from my plate.

Cameron dipped a piece of bread in his garlic sauce and took a bite. “Lance, I’ve given serious thought to your request to establish another club. You have my approval to begin drawing up specs.”

Lance took a sip of wine. “That’s very generous of you, Cole.”

“I will, of course, lend my dominatrixes.” Cameron waved his hand casually. “I’ll provide my best doms to get your club off the ground. Once established, you can hire who you like.”

“The club will carry your name,” said Lance. “With your stamp of approval, you’ll encourage members to utilize its services. I can’t exactly have it under my name, now can I?”

“If I do agree to provide Enthrall’s name, you’ll honor my rules,” said Cameron.

Lance’s knife sliced through his lamb cutlet. “I’m sure we can promise you that.”

“How are your plans going to run for Congress this year?” asked Shay.

“My team’s ready,” said Lance.

“Love the campaign slogan,” said Cameron. “Very catchy—”

“Vote Merrill or Peril,” said Lance. “Some young pup came up with that in my campaign office. He’d worked with Frederick Baxter during his run in New York. Won him his seat. Very talented young man.”

“Sounds like it,” said Cameron. “Why isn’t he still working for Baxter?”

“He fired him,” said Lance. “Brought in new talent.”

Cameron gave a nod of approval. “So, I’d like to offer you a compromise. I know we reneged on you winning this prime submissive.”

I set my glass down, nervous I’d tip it over and embarrass myself.

“I’m here to collect,” said Lance, his focus settling on me.

Making me squirm.

Cameron’s hand rested on my thigh. “Here’s the deal. I’ve discussed this issue with Richard at length and we’ve come to what we believe is a satisfactory conclusion.”

“Let’s hear it,” said Lance.

“First, you agree to drop the threat against Richard.”

Lance shrugged. “Sure.”

“And you give me your word my therapeutic techniques are never discussed or questioned again.”

“How long am I getting Mia for?” said Lance.

I raised my chin high, defiant, ready for Cameron to tell Lance where he could stick it.

“One week,” said Cameron calmly. “You get her for one week only.”

Thoughtfully, Lance chewed his lip.

As I bit through mine.

What the fuck!

Cameron stretched back casually. “Returned to me by the stroke of midnight on Sunday.”

A jolt of adrenaline made my hands tremble.

Disbelief.

Was Cameron doing this because of what I’d done to him in The London Tower? Had I pushed him too far? Pushed him away?

“Do you agree to my terms?” asked Cameron.

“You have my word,” said Lance, raising his glass in a toast.

Cameron and Shay raised their glasses too, looking mighty happy with this fucked up agreement.

In the shower, Cameron had rested his forehead against mine. ‘I’ll always watch over you,’ he’d told me. ‘You know that, don’t you?’

Another wave of lightheadedness.

Had every word been a lie?

I tugged on Cameron’s pant leg.

“Mia,” he snapped. “Will you stop doing that.”

I flinched and shot Shay a look of confusion.

Shay rubbed his hand up and down my back. Seriously? Was he really trying to comfort me?

Lance gave a nod. “My wife will approve.”

“Exactly,” said Cameron. “Any longer and wives are prone to jealousy.”

“Unless of course you have a wife like mine,” said Lance. “Her kink makes mine pale.”

“She’s a stunning dominatrix,” said Cameron.

“Why thank you. I’m a lucky man.”

“How is Helete?” asked Cameron, as he signed the check and took his credit card back. He nudged the restaurant’s bill to the edge of the table.

“Very well, thank you,” said Lance. “Sends her regards. She’s back at the hotel getting a massage in our room. You know how business bores her.”

“Where are you staying?” asked Shay casually.

And earned himself a glare from Lance.

“How are the girls?” said Cameron. “Megan’s, what? Twenty-five now?”

“Twenty-six,” said Lance. “Just graduated from UCLA with honors. Arabella’s doing well. ”

“Glad to hear it. Megan will make a fine doctor,” said Cameron.

Lance’s lecherous gaze swept over my chest.

Forcing my best stone faced expression, I pretended none of this was affecting me. If I was going to get out of this, I’d have to stay calm. Focus. Rethink everything I thought I knew. Though with two glasses of wine fogging my brain, remaining elegant was challenging. Crawling under the table and bolting for the door was still in the running.

Cameron glanced at his watch. “Well, I think we’re done here.”

“Sir?” I poked his side.

He snapped round to look at me.

Right now he was going head to head with Lance on the bastard Richter scale.

“Can I talk to you privately?” I whispered.

“Not right now, no.” Cameron leaned over and played with a strand of my hair. “Honor everything you’ve been taught. Obey every command. Please your new master.”

“Remember what we discussed earlier, Mia,” said Shay, his fingertip trailing my shoulder.

I’d shrugged off Shay’s hand.

His words screamed back into my brain. “Get with the program,” he’d told me. “You’re their plaything.”

“I need to go to the restroom,” I said.

Cameron folded his napkin and placed it on the table. “Later.”

“Now.”

“Mia.” Cameron kept his voice low. “We’ve been over this. Firstly, you failed to ask permission to speak. Secondly, your disrespect is unfathomable—”

“What about what I want?”

The kick to my shin came from Shay.

Cameron’s glare softened as he turned back to Lance. “As you can see, you’ll find her disobedient, but in there lies the pleasure. Gag her. I do. Does the trick.”

What the fucking hell?

I reached for my glass, my face flushed with indignation.

“Any other advice you can think of?” said Cameron to Shay. “Before we say goodbye to Mia?”

“A whipping quiets her,” said Shay. “She’s a newbie so she can’t take too much in the way of pain. FYI.”

“Unless of course you’re into screaming,” said Cameron. “Which as far as I recall, Lance, you’re not. You much prefer an amiable sub.” He looked at me with affection. “We’re getting there.”

“I like screaming,” said Lance. “Under the right circumstances.”

We were in danger of seeing those clams I’d eaten.

Lance’s eyelids lowered, as though he was running these scenarios offered up so willingly. “My wife will be pleased.”

“No,” I told them. “I’m not going.”

“Is she usually like this?” said Lance. “I thought you’d trained her?”

“I’ve got this.” Cameron gestured an apology. “Mia, your silence is requested. As is your obedience.” He handed me my handbag. “Conduct yourself accordingly.”

That threat back in the shower about his reputation hanging on my ability to obey made me seethe.

Tears stung my eyes. “I don’t have my pills,” I whispered, my inner voice screaming you don’t need them.

Cos you’re not fucking going.

Lance frowned. “Pills?”

“Contraception,” said Cameron, waving it off.

So much for effing diplomacy.

“Mia, I’ll have them sent to Lance’s hotel,” said Cameron.

“Claridges,” said Lance, and his eyebrow twitched.

“Lovely hotel,” said Cameron. “Great afternoon tea. Maybe we could meet up this week. Check in on how things are going?”

I just needed to get from here to the door and out into the fresh air. I’d worry about where to go next once I was free from this debacle.

“Ms. Lauren.” Cameron lowered his voice to a whisper. “Of all my fucktoys, you’re my—”

He blinked at me through red wine trickling down his face. Scarlet liquid trailed and soaked his shirt, but the napkin on his lap caught the rest.

Of course this wasn’t the first time I’d spilled wine on him. Though the last time had been an accident. This time not so much. Cameron had acted so calm last time, so kind, even taking the blame for my mishap.

Judging from his flaring nostrils, this time would be different.

He glared at me. “Don’t think I won’t spank you.”

“Just you try.”

“Mia,” snapped Shay. “Apologize.”

“I’ll smash these plates.” I reached for mine.

Shay’s strong fingers wrapped around my wrist and pulled my hand back.

Hushed whispers rose from around us. Only then did I realize Lance had left the table and headed for the door.

“Now something like this,” said Cameron, dabbing his face with his napkin. “Would be totally bad for one’s political career.”

Shay let go. “He’s lucky the wine landed on you then.”

“That really was a bit of luck,” said Cameron, amused.

Shay pulled out his phone and texted: ‘Claridges. Find out which room.’

“Did you just play me?” I said.

“A fine performance, Mia,” said Shay, pushing send.

Cameron licked wine from the corner of his mouth. “1972. Now that was a good year.” He beamed at me. “Let’s take dessert to go.”

CHAPTER 15

WE LEFT ZENGI via the staff door.

Shay and Cameron led me towards the Range Rover idling at the curb.

“I’m not getting in.” I pulled away from him. “Not until you tell me that will never happen again.”

Cameron grabbed my arms. “In you get. Now, please.”

I tried to wiggle free.

Cameron pressed me up against the car and cupped my face with an ironclad grip, kissing me fiercely, his lips forcing my submission. My limbs lost their will to fight, and my legs weakened. The aroma of sauvignon rose from his shirt.

I bit his lip and he shuddered against me, resting his forehead on mine.

He nudged me towards the open door. “In.”

Shay got in the other side.

I was too infuriated to speak, my fingers balling into fists, my lips pursed to hold back my fury. Cameron had taught me to articulate my feelings and ironically it was he who was about to get the brunt of my anger.

Shay smirked. “Oh come on, Mia. That was fun. You saw Lance’s face?”

“You’re both out of your minds.”

“As if I’d ever hand you over just like that,” said Cameron. “You mean too much to me. You know that.”

And as though not covered in wine and having not just fucked with my head, Cameron presented his profile of Lance Merrill to Shay and I like we were his students and he was our professor.

I sat there, mouth gaping at his incredulous lack of empathy for what he’d put me through.

“Lance Merrill’s high wire behavior is a remarkable quirk of the psyche,” Cameron said. “He believes himself to soar above the fray. His subconscious air of invincibility allows him the privilege of dabbling in our lifestyle while at the same time searching out political office.”

And so it went, Cameron back to his intellectual rambling and leaving out any part of how rapt with terror I’d been.

“Classic egomaniac,” said Shay.

“My nerves may never recover,” I muttered.

“Not even after chocolate profiteroles?” Cameron patted the dessert box we’d taken to go. “They’re your favorite.”

“They’re your favorite.”

“Then what’s your favorite?” he said.

I arched a brow. “Crème brulee.”

Boom.

His eyebrows shot up.

Yes, I too could shock and awe, Dr. Cole. The last time I’d had crème brulee I’d been licking it off his cock back in his Beverly Hills home.

The moment was lost on Shay.

I folded my arms. “You do realize you’re meant to set the example on how to treat me.”

“My reputation of being a hard ass is invaluable when dealing with the lions,” said Cameron. “Consider it a valuable flaw.”

“Many other subs would actually be honored to go with Merrill,” Shay said.

“Not this one,” I said, wondering if I’d ever truly earn the title. “Do you think I scared him off?”

“Hard to tell,” said Shay.

“Profiterole?” Cameron took out a chocolate covered powdered pastry and pressed it to my lips.

I took a bite and chewed with a frown, despite the deliciousness.

Cameron ate the other half. “See, the answer to all life’s questions really is chocolate.”

These two rogues were out of control.

I slumped back. “Why not just threaten his political career?”

“And end up in the desert in an unmarked grave,” said Shay.

A piece of pastry stuck in my throat and I coughed to clear it.

“We must reassure our clients their privacy is respected,” said Cameron. “Any deviance on that promise and all trust is lost.”

“So you’re just trying to put Lance off me?” I said.

“These high power types lean towards well trained and subservient subs,” said Cameron. “Your feistiness gave him second thoughts.”

“But he likes screaming?” I said.

“Not in public,” said Shay. “Not when everyone has video capability on their phone. One public display from you and the foundation of his campaign would be compromised.”

“Lance caught the rumors that both Richard and I… have found favor in you, Mia,” said Cameron, brushing an invisible spec of fluff off his pants.

“So that’s what motivates him,” said Shay. “He coverts you.”

“You’ve taught me to read people.” I squinted at Cameron. “Hear the truth in between their lies.”

“What does that mean?” said Shay.

“You’re not off the hook either,” I snapped at him. “You made me feel like I was worthless and that was before we went out to dinner.”

“I’m disappointed, Mia,” said Cameron. “Do you really think I’d hire a chauvinist?”

Shay leaned forwards. “Don’t ever let anyone tell you you’re not good enough. It doesn’t matter where you’ve come from. What kind of education you’ve had. What you wear or who you associate with. You’re their equal.”

“You were very persuasive in the kitchen.”

Shay sat back. “If it makes you feel any better, watching your self esteem crumble was just as unpleasant for me.”

“You called me a fucktoy.”

“We needed a hot button word for you,” explained Cameron. “Fucktoy is apparently yours.”

I frowned at them.

“We set you up for an emotional springboard reaction,” said Cameron. “I used the word. You reacted.”

“Right on cue,” said Shay.

“Mia,” said Cameron dryly. “Do you hate me again?”

“Yes. I do.”

Cameron peered over at Shay. “Mission accomplished.”

I opened the box of profiteroles, picked one up, and took a bite. “Your artful manipulation is going to get you in trouble one day.”

Cameron stared out of the window. “Tell me about it.” His gaze found me, that familiar affection lingering.

His eyes held mine, giving that promise of pleasure now forbidden.

“After all I’ve taught you,” he said, “you still doubt me. You once told me you believed yourself my equal. One challenge and your self esteem evaporates.”

“I trusted Shay’s opinion,” I said.

“And betrayed your own self-worth,” said Shay.

“You both send mixed messages.”

“As does the world, Mia,” said Cameron. “A strong sense of self worth is undeniably your greatest ally.”

“We’re playing at the highest level,” said Shay. “You’re moving in circles with those who believe themselves to be socially elite. The politically connected. Don’t let them throw you off course.”

“Or off balance,” said Cameron.

“Your performance in front of Lance was very convincing,” I said.

“Mia, you’re the most sincere person I know,” said Cameron. “Had I shared the plan you would have been unable to be this convincing. I’m protecting you.”

“Our means are unusual,” said Shay, “But then again so is our lifestyle.”

Folding my arms across my chest, I was a long way off forgiving them.

“I have something for you,” said Cameron.

Shay had the driver pass back a wrapped present that had been sitting on the passenger seat.

“What is this? A guilt gift?” I unraveled the ribbons.

“I’m sure it’ll take more than this for you to forgive me,” said Cameron. “Your pupils are still dilated. Your adrenaline hasn’t worn off yet.”

I resisted rolling my eyes and withdrew the slender iPhone.

And held back on a smile when I turned it over and saw the Hello Kitty iPhone case.

“I thought you’d like that,” said Cameron, smiling.

“Something tells me you won’t let me keep this case for long,” I said.

He shrugged. “Shay’s transferred all your contacts and your music. He also installed CyberVape. If you want to delete any messages, you just push the star next to the message and it’s gone forever.”

I’d kept every single text Richard had ever sent me. Cameron’s too. I wondered if when Shay had transferred my data over he’d caught that. I was too tired to discuss how they’d violated my privacy.

“I’ll pay you back,” I said.

“You’re my executive assistant,” said Cameron. “A phone comes with the job.”

“Thank you,” I said. “You left my other one back at the hotel?”

“We deleted all the data,” said Shay.

I gave a nod, letting them know that made me feel better. Still, that phone had been the first thing I’d bought when I’d started my new job and I felt a twinge of sentimental loss.

Cameron looked down at his shirt. “Well, looks like we’re going to have to be imaginative when it comes to finding a punishment for this.”

“Not that you didn’t deserve it,” I said.

“Our feisty Mia scared off Lance Merrill,” he said. “Now that was impressive.”

“When are we flying back to L.A.?” I asked.

“We’re spending Christmas here,” said Cameron. “I’ve invited Stephen for Christmas eve dinner and Richard will be here soon.”

“Then I need to go Christmas shopping tomorrow,” I said.

“Do it online.” Cameron frowned. “Shay will pick your gifts up from the store.”

“Sure,” said Shay. “I’ll set you up with a laptop.”

“I want to go out and choose the gifts myself.”

“Shay can go with you,” said Cameron.

“I want to buy Shay a gift too.”

“I don’t want anything.”

“It’s not up to you,” I told him.

“Let’s discuss this tomorrow,” said Cameron.

I was just about to tell him I didn’t need his permission when we turned the corner onto Chelsea Crescent. My bed was calling my name.

I followed Cameron inside the house, with Shay right behind us. Cameron grabbed my hand and led me through to the living room.

I slapped my hand over my mouth.

Blinking in amazement.

There, in the corner, was a tall Christmas tree, its pine leaves exuding that Christmas smell, its greenness striking. Boxes were stacked to the left of it.

Cameron pointed to them. “Decorations.”

Shay beamed at us. “My men did a good job.”

I wrapped my arms around Cameron. “Thank you so much.”

“We can decorate it tomorrow morning,” said Cameron.

I knelt by the boxes and opened one of them up and saw the blue and green baubles, and in another lay strands of blue tinsel. I beamed up at Cameron.

He opened his palms. “What can I tell you. You’re a bad influence on me.”

“It’s the most beautiful tree I’ve ever seen,” I said. “I’ve never had a tree.”

“Never had a Christmas tree?” said Shay.

I wasn’t going to share I’d had a plastic one growing up. My mom had let it slip Dad found it in a dumpster, with a straggly strand of old white shiny tinsel stuck to it. I’d been grateful to have a tree that year.

I leaped up and hugged Cameron again.

“I have to take a shower,” he said. “Go to bed, missy.”

“Which room am I sleeping in?” I whispered.

Shay stepped into the kitchen, giving us some privacy.

With a gentle fingertip, Cameron raised my chin. “Your room.”

“And you’ll sleep in yours?”

He gave a nod and his eyes swept over the tree again.

Cameron headed off up stairs.

Shay headed upstairs too.

I felt safe knowing there were two capable men in the house. Should Lance try anything scary, they’d be just one scream away.

“I’ll be right up,” I told them.

I leaned into the tree and breathed in the delicate fragrance of pine needles. I couldn’t wait to go shopping and then place my presents underneath. My awesome new salary meant I could buy the best gifts ever this year.

I went through each box, admiring the assorted collections of Santa Clauses, snowmen, and stars. The string of lights would look beautiful. It would make the house so pretty for when Richard arrived.

Turning my new phone around, I admired the sleek screen and Hello Kitty case. Cameron really did have a sense of humor.

I scrolled through until I got to Richard’s name and punched his number. It went to voice mail but it was so good to hear his voice.

“Richard, it’s me,” I said. “I just got my phone back. The house doesn’t have one. Which of course you know, because it’s yours. How are you? I miss you. Can’t wait to see you. We have a tree. Not sure if that was meant to be a surprise.” I giggled. “Have a good flight. See you soon.”

A wave of guilt washed over me.

Had that call meant I’d just betrayed Cameron?

The one man who could talk me through this dilemma had just gone to bed.

Trepidation curled in my stomach at the thought of seeing Richard again. I wondered if Cameron would be flying him out on his private plane. Would Richard feel the same about me? It was strange he hadn’t called, but then again I’d lost my phone. Maybe he knew about what Cameron had done with my old one.

Dr. Finley was right about not showing fear. Maybe Lance respected that and would now leave us alone.

A well of grief settled deep as I thought about how Richard must be feeling over me being with Cameron. He’d unselfishly let me leave on that plane to protect me, which extended my time with Cameron. Richard was superhero material too.

I reasoned these spiraling thoughts were due to tiredness. These men had lived this lifestyle longer than I ever had and knew what they could cope with. I only wished they realized what all this to and fro was doing to me.

Making my way through the kitchen, I caught sight of Shay’s jacket. A flash of inspiration came over me and I felt for that key in his pockets, a little guilty for touching his stuff without permission.

Tiptoeing down the hallway, silently begging the floorboards not to give me away, I descended into the basement. The door to the playroom was ahead.

Fine hairs prickled on my forearms. The temperature dropped.

With a turn of the key, the door opened and I pushed it ajar.

“What are you doing?”

I spun round and stared back up the stairwell to see Shay.

His gaze found the key in the door and his disapproving expression worsened. “Come here.”

“Checking on something.” I pushed open the door.

“Mia!”

Stepping in, I assessed the damage.

Shay took two steps at a time and quickly followed me.

“Just need a second,” I said.

“Go to bed, Mia.” He reached for me.

I pulled away and staggered to the left.

The Saint Andrew’s Cross was tipped over. Whips and chains and other instruments of punishment were strewn on the floor.

The sound of someone approached.

Cameron appeared in the doorway and he was wearing jeans and a leather jacket. His questioning glare settled on Shay.

“She found the key,” said Shay.

“Evidently.”

“What happened in here?” I asked.

Cameron brushed his hand through his hair. “I’m going out.”

“Where are you going?” I asked.

“Enslave,” he said. “My London club. No visit to London would be complete without me paying a visit.” He turned to go. “I’ll take the Ducati.”

Oh God, Cameron on a motorbike. This I wanted to see.

“Can I go with you?” I said.

Cameron turned to Shay. “Watch over her.”

“Of course.”

“Richard’s not answering his phone,” I said. “Have you spoken with him?”

Shay gave me a not now frown.

Cameron headed back up the stairs.

“I’m sorry,” I shouted after him. “Just wanted to know what happened in here.”

“I’ll be back in the morning,” Cameron called back.

CHAPTER 16

FINGERS CURLED THROUGH my hair.

I sprung awake and flinched back onto my pillow, trying to get away from the shadowy figure sitting on the edge of my bed. Blinking into the darkness, I got my bearings, but my heart thundered.

“It’s me.”

“Cameron?” I pushed myself up the headboard.

He leaned over and flicked on the bedside lamp.

“I didn’t mean to wake you,” he slurred. “I was just looking at you.”

“Is something wrong? Are you okay?”

I’d never seen him tipsy before. There was a boyishness to him, a vulnerability. He squinted, raising his hand to protect his bloodshot eyes from the glare of the lamp. That five o’clock shadow was sexy.

“Please tell me you didn’t ride that bike like this?” I said in a panic.

“Came home in a cab.” He raised a finger. “Taxi.”

“Where’s the bike?”

His gaze found mine. “Nothing happened at Enslave. I didn’t stay long. I want you to know that.”

“Well as we’re not dating, Cameron—”

“I had drinks with Stephen.”

“Dr. Finley?”

“He’s almost as annoying as you.”

“Why is that?”

He frowned at me. “Because you’re annoying.”

“Shall I get you some water?”

“I’d never hurt you, Mia.” A delayed sweep of his hand declined the drink. “Never intentionally.”

“I know.”

“Something’s happened.”

I pushed myself up farther.

“Something unspeakable.” He held his hand over his heart. “Here.”

Reaching out, I pressed my hand over his, waiting for him to say the words we both needed him to admit.

He stared off. “This room’s very small. Why do we have you in here?”

“I like it.”

“I’m sorry you saw the playroom,” he said. “I should have thrown away the key.”

“What happened in there?”

“Me.”

I frowned at him.

“That earring,” he said, shifting uneasily. “Your expression when you found it. I can’t bear to see you sad. Nope. Can’t do it.”

“Oh Cameron,” I said. “I understand there were women before me.”

“I want to protect you from the world,” he said. “Hard to believe I know after that surprising way I behaved in front of Lance at dinner. He’s set on having you and I’m not sure of the length he’ll go. I wanted to scare him off you.”

“I understand.”

“He knows what you mean to me. It’s that knowledge that puts you at risk. This is all my fault.”

“Richard auctioned me off. Lance bid higher. You weren’t there.”

“I was.”

“But I thought—”

“I’m a fast driver, Mia, but I’m not that fast.” He took my hand and squeezed it. “I came to Chrysalis and hung out in my office. Just in case you might need me. I never really believed it would go wrong.” He sighed. “I should have stopped the auction, but Richard was intent on proving to everyone…”

“Please forgive him. I have.”

He traced a fingertip over my cheek. “Because you’re the sweetest, the most beautiful, the most extraordinary woman I’ve…” He looked horrified. “Did I say that out loud?”

“Said what?”

He gave a crooked grin. “I’m a bit drunk, apparently.”

“My sweet Cameron.”

“You’re not really mine,” he muttered.

“Just tell me I’ll still see you.”

He caressed his brow. “What the fuck have you done to me?”

My breath caught in my throat.

He pressed his hand against his chest, as though trying to rub away an ache.

I patted the bed. “Climb in.”

“I have a surprise for you.”

“Surprise?”

“How are you with heights?”

“Cameron.” I swung my legs round, climbed out of bed, and reached for his jacket. I gave it a tug. “It’s 3AM.”

He pulled me to him and buried his face in my chest. “Forgive me. I don’t deserve you. That’s why you can never be mine.”

“What are you talking about?”

“The way I spoke to you in front of Lance.” He peered up at me. “I did it to protect you. You understand that, right?”

“Your ways are a little unconventional.”

“It’s like playing chess with the devil. You must be prepared to do the unthinkable to protect the ones you—” He nuzzled in farther. “Care about.”

I weakened in his arms, my legs wobbling, my heart aching for him even though he was right here.

Safe in his hug, I melted into him. “Maybe we’ll find a way?”

“Impossible.” He pushed me away and stood up, towering over me. “I need coffee.”

“You need sleep.”

“I usually only get four or five hours a night anyway… unless I sleep with…” His gaze lingered on mine.

“Shall I tuck you in?”

Confusion marred his face. “I’d waste what little time….”

I reached for him.

He avoided my hand. “We’re going out. Wear underwear. Only. You’ll find a coat in your wardrobe. It has a fur lining. Not real fur. I still have some decency left in me.”

“Well that’s a relief. Are we going to Enslave?”

He stepped towards the door.

“Cameron?”

He turned to look at me.

Say it.

“Have you noticed how low the doors are?” He looked up at the frame. “Any lower and I’d be rendered unconscious.”

“You’re the bravest man I know,” I said. “Why can’t you—”

“You’re banned from the playroom.”

I rested my hands on my hips at his avoidance. “You know talking is the only answer—”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

I lowered my gaze, shaken by his sudden fierceness.

“Black lace,” he said. “Garter and stockings. Heels.”

“Are you going to tell me where we’re going?”

He swept his hands wide “Above all this.”

CHAPTER 17

A SMILE LIT up Cameron’s face when he saw me.

I dressed in matching black lace bra, panties, and stockings beneath this fur lined coat, adding a hat and scarf before meeting him downstairs. He stood in the kitchen with his fingers wrapped around a coffee mug.

Seconds later, trailing behind a tipsy Cameron, who was finding all this highly amusing, I tried to keep my giggling low. I’d never seen him so playful, and with a mischievous grin.

His fingertip pressed to his lips warned me to stay silent. We sneaked out of the house, trying not to wake a sleeping Shay.

When the taxi arrived, we’d locked the front door and headed out into the night. The air so chilly I had no choice but to snuggle next to him. We both breathed out puffs of cold until we’d reached the warmth of the cab.

Bleary eyed, I stared out at the passing scenery, too tired to be nervous over where we were going. Being with Cameron made up for this tiredness.

Last night I’d fallen asleep alone and miserable, assuming he’d gone off to his club to play with some young sub. My imagination had run all over the map with what he might be doing and who he might be doing it to.

Though now, here in this taxi with him, my emotions steadied out a little, reassured by his recent confession that nothing had happened last night, and he really did seem sincere. Something told me he’d gone to Dr. Finley’s for more advice. I wondered if our current adventure had anything to do with Stephen and his outrageous ideas, or if Cameron had thought it all up by himself.

Everything was different now.

If there was a line not to be crossed by a master and submissive, Cameron and I had crossed it. Despite him pretending otherwise, we’d allowed our true feelings to rise to the surface, and we’d broken all the rules set to prevent this. Those guidelines on how to conduct yourself when loaned out to another master were pretty much useless when it came to us: Submit entirely. Don’t fall in love. Do as you’re told.

Those rules had probably been made by a man.

As I’d fallen asleep on my pillow last night, I’d promised to brave these final hours with Cameron and take what I could from them. Learn as much as possible and guard my heart fiercely. Only all my defenses came crumbling down when he hugged me into him in the back of the taxi and rubbed his hands over mine to warm them.

We arrived on the South Bank of the River Thames within half an hour, and when I caught sight of the London Eye towering above I was again reminded Cameron knew how to woo a girl.

With my hand in his, he pulled me safely into the pod behind him. This all felt so dreamy. I had to pinch myself to believe this was happening and we were really on the best adventure ever.

He kissed me eagerly.

Pushing my back up against the glass, raising my hands above my head, his welcome affection only just took my mind off the fact we were suspended in the air.

His grip on my wrists tightened and his mouth pressed against mine. A graze of teeth then his tongue lashed mine. Arousal sparked with intensity.

God, what he did to me.

Getting over him was going to be the hardest thing I’d ever done.

But I didn’t have to give him up just yet. There were still a few more hours left of him.

He hugged me into him. “At the highest point, we’ll be four hundred feet up.”

A panoramic landscape opened up around us. My heart skipped a beat as I looked down at the shrinking view.

“I could live in this little pod,” I said. “If you were with me.”

Cameron gave an endearing shake of his head. He looked so relaxed, so calm, and when he stepped back and beamed at me it wasn’t just the view of the city that left me breathless.

Taking in all the other pods, I realized we were the only ones on the entire wheel. Ours was the only one not lit up. We were surrounded by a curved wall of glass providing a fantastic vantage point of the River Thames below and the stars above us. Each pod was spacious and could have easily carried twenty people comfortably.

Cameron stared off into the night. “The rotation takes thirty minutes.” He lowered his line of sight to take in the cars and a few pedestrians, who looked as small as ants.

I let out a long contented sigh, happy to be trapped in here with him, both of us leaving the world behind in our glassed capsule of escape. All of the drama from the last few weeks was left behind.

Time promised to stand still at least for awhile.

It seemed such a long time ago I’d been standing in Enthrall’s coffee room, left speechless from my first meeting with him. Cameron’s presence was disarming. As the days dissolved into weeks, I’d gotten to know him. At first, intimidation had ruled our every interaction, but as time went on I’d glimpsed behind his sexy façade. I’d seen his kindness, the way he was with people, and all those things he did without anyone knowing, like putting his housekeeper’s son through school, or making sure his other employees had everything they needed.

Yes, Cameron really was my sexy, sensual superhero.

And superheros always went it alone.

Not once in all the time did I ever imagine I’d be here in London with him, looking out at a spectacular view of a foreign city.

Through the blue fluorescent haze of the wheel, we stared out at the sweeping nightscape. We could see Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament. And over there, far off in the distance, was Buckingham Palace. Memories of our visit came flooding back, making me tingle in all those delicious places all over again. Cameron chuckled to himself and I wondered if he too was recalling yesterday.

Raindrops splotched onto the glass and those small beads of water made it shimmer.

Grateful for the warmth of the faux fur lining, I marveled at how anyone could survive being outside during a British winter in just their underwear. Luckily for us, the pod was heated. I slipped off my gloves and scarf and placed them onto the bench then returned to the edge and settled into the now, savoring every second and wanting to remember every detail of these profound unfolding moments. Cameron’s playfulness, his serenity, this new side to him I was fast falling for.

The dizzying height above the city was merely a backdrop to my out of control emotions.

Cameron threw a surreptitious glance at the central wooden seat. I’d never seen him like this before. He was always so sure, so confident, so bossy, yet up here I was seeing him anew.

He’d warned me in no uncertain terms what his intentions were before we left the house. Only now he blinked into the dimness with what even might be mistaken for reservation.

“Cameron?” I said.

“I’m taking a mental picture.” His gaze settled on me. “I want this soldered onto my brain.”

I nuzzled in for another hug, his body firm and warm, his strong arms wrapping around me, his kisses so affectionate.

“London’s such a romantic city,” he said wistfully. “Don’t you think?”

He walked over to the seat, removed his coat, and threw it onto the bench. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out his phone, resting it next to it.

“How long have you been planning this?” I asked.

He continued to scroll across the screen. “It all came together last minute.”

“Was it the same contact that got us into the Palace?”

“The Palace was easy,” he said. “This took a little more effort.” He pointed toward a panel. “The security cameras are disabled for thirty more minutes. And with the lights turned off in our pod, we’re invisible to the public.”

“And you trust the staff here?” I imagined the bid for footage of whatever Cameron might have in mind for us would be worth quite a bit to a trashy old tabloid.

“It’s worth it,” was all he said.

“Oh Cameron.” I stared off at Big Ben. “We’re in London.”

“So we are.”

“And you’re here with me.”

“I am.”

I lowered my gaze. “And beneath this I’m only wearing underwear.”

He gave a look of mock horror.

A soft ballad rose out of his phone.

He held out his hand. “Dance with me?”

My girly muse giggled with joy as Cameron swept me up into his arms. His left arm reached around to rest his hand on the lower arch of my back, and his right hand held mine, raising it to his chest.

We swayed leisurely.

He then led us in a slow dance around the pod, guiding us in wide circles, occasionally dipping me back and low in a dramatic sweep of control. Cameron’s step work proved he was no stranger to the waltz. He showed a surety with each maneuver as he swept me from one end of the pod to the other, and the lights from the city became a blur as we spun. A twirl under his arm morphed into continuous spinning. My feet were light on the ground, and my head and heart tried to keep up.

As we danced around that pod, it reminded me of one of those old romantic black and white films my mom had loved to watch, where the lover seduces his sweetheart and there was nothing but simplicity and innocence. As though we really were the only ones on the planet awake at this hour.

Cameron had already given me so much and now this, this awe-inspiring dance at the top of the world. Our dreamy fantasy went on forever. He moved so elegantly, never losing that masculine streak that made me weak in his arms.

Eventually, he stilled and pressed his firm body against mine. “Our first dance.”

Together we stood looking out, his fingers playing with my hair and making my scalp tingle. My hand wrapped around his waist, never wanting to let go.

I slid to my knees and stared up at him. “Master.” I reached for him. “Don’t forget me.”

“Never.”

I freed him from his pants and that perfect velvetiness responded to my kiss. He threw his head back and stared at the dark sky above as I took his full length into my mouth.

While suckling his smoothness, my left hand cupped his balls and my other worked him in unison with my strokes. Worshiping his maleness, I ran my tongue along sensitive ridges and remembered what he’d taught me. I swept my tongue along the crown of his cock in short, quick licks until I heard his short, sharp gasps.

Passionately, I lowered my head to take his balls in my mouth, kneading with my lips and exulting when he let out a moan of pleasure.

It was my turn to enthrall.

“Have you been taking your pills, Mia?” he whispered.

I gave a nod I had.

“I want to come inside you,” he whispered huskily. “No condom. I need to feel you.”

Ignited by his words, I wrapped my fingers around his shaft and kissed the tip again and again.

“Up,” he commanded.

Cameron sat and pulled me towards him, easing my panties off my hips. I helped him by reaching low to grab them off my ankles then I straddled him. Opening my coat, I wrapped it around us both. My stocking covered legs rested on either side of his, and I coiled my arms around his neck. His firmness grew between my thighs.

Rocking against him, I rubbed my cleft along his hardness and moaned softly. His hands cupped my face as he kissed me. Tenderly at first, and then frenzied, his mouth exploring mine. His cock grew rock hard as I rubbed my clit along him, yearning for him.

“Please, sir.” I reached for his hardness, positioning the tip.

He pushed into me, deep. My head fell onto his shoulder and my body adjusted to the strain, having almost forgotten his enormity.

Breathing through the tautness, the spasms, my short sharp gasps signaled my building pleasure.

“Lean back,” he said, and grabbed both my wrists.

Falling backwards slightly, safe in his grasp, my sex throbbed around him. I stared up at the stars. My hips circled as his firmness stretched me wider. My thighs trembled and my hair tumbled behind me.

Dark clouds floated above us, hiding the stars here and there, only for them to reappear. My vision blurred with this rising pleasure.

Moving my hips slowly in a circle, slower still, I concentrated on maintaining a perfect rhythm, riding him elegantly in this luxurious pose. These blissful sensations he brought caused me to shudder.

And moan…

He grabbed my wrists with his left hand, and with his right he reached between my thighs. His fingers set a delicate pace on my clit to regulate a steady beat that I obediently followed with my revolving hips.

Tumbling over the edge, freefalling in his hold, I climaxed on and on and on until I was gone from this place, this planet. I rose amongst the stars.

Then shuddered against him.

This, our dark duet, felt like love.

He pulled me up and towards him again and spun me around with him still inside, effortlessly repositioning me to face the front.

He looked up. “We’re almost at the top.”

Following his gaze, I caught sight of us approaching the uppermost level of the rotation. The skyline was an incredible vista spreading forever around us.

He eased my thighs apart, placing my legs on either side of his and spreading them wider. Had the rain not been coming down so hard, I’d have panicked about being so exposed to the world.

He held me in that exact same pose he’d captured me in when we’d first begun my training. My back to his front. Moving my hips in a slow, leisurely circle, widening my circumference, I wanted to prove I cherished all he’d taught me. Even this, our sensuous dance after our dance.

“No one can see in,” he said, as though reading my thoughts.

The reflection of us stared back from the glass; a mirror image of our limbs intertwined, our passionate joining.

“The rain,” I whispered. “It’s so cleansing.”

“You’re cleansing, Mia.”

I brought my hands behind my back and held my wrists together, feeling the smoothness of his leather belt as he wrapped it around my wrists and gave it a hard tug. Bound by him, impaled on him, I was his to do with as he pleased. His plaything, his instrument to tease and toy. My head fell back in a swoon.

I wanted to live here in this serenity of being with him, remain connected forever.

His fingers tweaked my nipples until I cried out for more clit play. His left hand covered my mouth, while his right slid along my wetness. The occasional near miss of touching my sex sent me into a writhing mess. My thighs shook, and my body’s need took over and forcing me to bounce on his hardness.

“Nice and slow,” he demanded. “Good girl.”

Just as he’d soldered this day into his memory, he’d branded me with the memory of him. His possession stole all of me, even my soul.

Rising towards that brilliant plateau, his fingertips gave up their torture and rested on my wetness. I could no longer tell where his fingers began and my sex ended. His strumming sent a perfect heated buzz of bliss. His hand melted into me—

We became one.

Then came a final fracturing of all I’d held onto, all I’d kept back, all I’d refused to feel. My heart opened wide as those fragments of doubt that I could ever experience emotions this deep now crept away.

Cameron was taking me to the edge of the world and showing me there was nothing to fear.

I was capable of anything.

Deserving to be here.

Worthy of him.

We found our rhythm, our synchronicity returning to that controlled pace he insisted on, and I glided elegantly above, rising and falling onto his hardness, rising and falling, rising and falling, flying ever higher into the abyss of an orgasm.

I lost all strength in my legs and settled on his lap, his cock still deeply impaled. He leaned back and pounded his hips against mine, sending us both over the edge again, the shock of each strike making me moan.

The view was a haze of a million raindrops upon the ceiling.

The leather belt came off my wrists.

Cameron shoved me up to a standing position and nudged me towards the pane of glass in front. I bent slightly, balancing on my tiptoes and leaning forwards against it, splaying my fingers for balance then thrusting my buttocks out towards him.

He gripped my hips and he thrust deep inside me again. His hammering against my buttocks grew violent and glorious. His balls striking my sex sent me over again, casting me into subspace.

Smudges of rain on the other side of the glass shimmered.

The tension of being held in this position became a delicious ache and my limbs trembled with the strain. Blinded by pleasure, I saw nothing but stars in my mind’s eye. Imaginary fireworks exploded within.

I screamed through my climax.

Cameron yelled my name through his—

His warmth filled me. His trembling sent shivers of heat inside my shuddering body.

Steam clouded the glass before us.

Cameron stilled. His sighs echoed the last of his release.

We were messy, and noisy, and brilliant together.

He resumed sliding in and out in a luxurious glide to savor me, and I savored these long drawn out pangs of sensuous pleasure.

“God, Mia,” he said huskily. “You take my breath away.”

In a flurry of movement and need, I was turned to face him and he lifted me up and pressed my back against the glass. I wrapped my legs around his body, hugging him, planting kiss after kiss on his cheek.

Cameron had shown me more than the world. He’d shown me how to love.

CHAPTER 18

SHAY HAD A piping hot pot of coffee waiting for us.

We’d gotten back to the house just before 5AM.

Shay had received an alert on his phone, he told us, from Andrew, one of his men guarding us outside the property. Andrew had apparently followed us to the South Bank.

Shay slid a mug toward Cameron. “He double checked the security footage wasn’t being recorded by the London Eye staff.” Shay followed that up with an arched brow. “A billionaire up to no good in a pod is great fodder for the press.”

“I’d taken care of that detail,” said Cameron. “And for your information, I was up to some pretty fantastic good.”

Shay gave a shake of his head and his gaze swept over me.

Had he needed convincing, my post fucked hair was doing its bit to give me away. That and my coat I’d declined to take off. My smudged lipstick had long been kissed off.

“It’s my job to double check on that detail,” said Shay. “Please don’t make it any easier for Lance.”

“You worry too much,” said Cameron.

“I’m also here as your friend.”

Cameron beamed. “I needed my Mia fix. And now she’s out of my system.” He looked over at me. “We’re all good.”

Turning my attention to the pretty pattern on my mug, I pretended I’d not bitten the inside of my cheek. I admired the delicate floral design that reminded me of an English garden.

Just like Dr. Finley’s. I wondered what the good doctor would make of all this. This impossible gravity called Cameron Cole pulled me toward him, only to emotionally shove me away just as powerfully.

I zeroed back in on what they were saying—

“Richard’s the thrill seeker,” said Shay. “Please don’t tell me it’s rubbing off.”

“I rather like this spontaneity thing,” said Cameron. “I might give it another try before the trip’s done.” He winked at me.

My head almost exploded with that threat. One more intensive Cameron go-around and I’d never recover. For God’s sake, I could still smell his cologne on me and my sex still ached from his pounding. I wondered how he could act so casual, so nonchalant, so ‘let’s go again’ and decimate Mia’s heart.

“You okay, Mia,” he asked.

“I have to go Christmas shopping,” I said. “I have to decorate the tree. Make the house look lovely for Richard.”

Cameron was seemingly distracted, taking sip after sip of his coffee.

And all this talk of me having to get over Cameron had forced my hand to play along, not wanting to seem like the clingy woman who made waves. I wanted to make it easy on everyone.

“I’ll go with you, Mia,” said Shay, raising a hand to gesture his insistence. “I’ll be discreet. Keep my distance.”

I rounded the coffee bar, wrapped my arms around Cameron’s waist, and gave him the biggest hug. “Thank you for an amazing time.” I peered up at him. “Thank you for everything. All of it. I promise to cherish every last second.”

He gave a thin smile. “Well, good.”

“Mia, sitting room please,” said Shay.

I looked up at Cameron, wondering if I’d done something wrong.

Cameron gave a nod of approval. “Now is a good time as any.”

“For what?” I said.

“For you to obey,” said Shay, his glare so intense it motivated my legs to move, and I broke away from Cameron and quick footed it into the sitting room.

A flash of doubt swept over me.

“Take your coat off,” said Shay, and he slipped off his shoes and socks and threw them near the couch.

Silently, I pleaded with Cameron.

Shay peeled off his sweater, revealing his six pack abs. He flexed his muscles to prove just how fit he was. His narrowed gaze settled on me.

“Mia,” said Cameron. “Shay’s seen you in your underwear. Don’t be bashful.”

“Are you both…” I couldn’t say it.

And to think Cameron was always calling me insatiable.

But two men…

“You have a dirty mind, missy,” said Cameron, smiling. “Take off your coat.”

Shay stepped forward and tugged at my belt, releasing it, then he set to work unbuttoning. “We need you agile.”

He removed it and he flung it on the couch right beside where Cameron was sitting.

Standing there in my corset, stockings, and thong, my arms covered my lace bra. That early morning chill soaked into my bones, despite the central heating. I tried to keep my panic at bay.

“It’s time we taught you self defense,” said Shay, grinning.

My hands shot to my hips and I frowned at them. These two bastards knew what I’d been thinking and they’d reveled in it.

I was going to kick me some Shay ass.

“I’m going to teach you to escape any assailant, no matter how tall or strong,” said Shay. “Even if he’s as strong as me. Though it’s unlikely he’d be as handsome.”

“Statistically,” said Cameron. “Virtually impossible.”

Shay flexed a bicep. “Chances are he won’t have these.”

“Nope, can’t see him having those,” said Cameron, chuckling.

“Will you get on with it,” I snapped.

A blur came at me.

I landed painlessly on my back on the carpet and stared up at the ceiling. I hadn’t even seen Shay approaching.

“What the fuck just happened?”

Cameron’s laugher came from the couch.

I pushed myself onto my elbows. “Not funny.”

Shay towered over me. “And so it begins.”

In typical ragdoll style, I was thrown all over the room by Shay. After an hour or so of trying to fight him off, I started to get the hang of the moves, mastering how to break the grip of my assailant, how to use an arm bar, and how to take the control of my attacker and get my power back.

In-between yawns, Cameron cheered me on.

He was always surprising me with new aspects of my education. I’d learned everything from the art of etiquette, how to play a round of tennis, how to host a dinner party, as well as my all time favorite, how to endure a thirty minute orgasm under his mastery with the elegance and obedience of a well trained submissive.

And now this.

It was impossible not to stare at Cameron in reverence for all he’d taught me.

“Mia, it’s time to get some sleep,” he said.

I’d been rubbing my eyes, burned out from all this adrenaline. And our nighttime romp in a pod on the London Eye had added to my exhaustion.

It was my turn to yawn.

“I need to get to the store to buy the ingredients for Christmas dinner,” said Cameron. “I’ll grab some sleep first too.”

“Are you cooking?” I said.

“We all are, Mia. You, me, and Shay.” He arched a brow. “Oh, and while you’re out shopping buy us some crackers.”

“Crackers?”

Shay shook his head in amusement. “You have a lot to learn, young one. A lot to learn.”

I giggled with excitement. “Are they cookies?”

“Christmas crackers are party decorations,” said Cameron. “No Christmas in good old Blighty is complete without them.”

“Blighty is a term of endearment for England,” explained Shay.

Crackers and Old Blightly--I really was in a foreign country even if it was similar to America.

“You are dismissed, Private Lauren,” said Shay.

I threw him a salute.

“Good job. Go get a couple of hours sleep before the shops open,” he said. “I’ll cook pancakes when you get up.”

“Thank you,” I said.

“Your training will come in handy to fight for those last minute deals,” joked Cameron.

And perhaps when Lance made his next move.

From the way Cameron and Shay were looking at each other, I knew they were thinking that too.

CHAPTER 19

SHAY HAD THE driver take us to Piccadilly’s Fortnum and Mason store just after 10AM.

I burst through the doors with so much excitement I startled the doorman. What with the soft classic music playing in the background and the red carpet spreading out before me, and the incredible scents of delicious coffees and teas luring me in, it was all too much to be able to contain my excitement.

This place was crowded with last minute shoppers. I eased my way through into the center of the store, happy that Shay had relented and let me have some privacy to roam without him trailing a few feet behind. I suspected he wasn’t far away. It was nice to have some alone time. I’d text him when I was done.

Full of happiness, I flew from floor to floor, mesmerized at all the wonderful things on sale that, for the first time in my life, I could afford. Fortnum and Mason was famous for being one of England’s most high end stores and I could see why.

Deciding what gifts to get my favorite men in the world was going to be a challenge. They had everything they needed and could afford anything they wanted, so I was going to have to give it some real thought.

I soon found the food hall, and it didn’t take me long to discover the chocolate counter filled to the brim with the most beautifully made tempting creations I’d ever seen. I strolled up and down, admiring the unending display.

Spread out before me was a veritable chocolate lover’s dream, the choice too mind blowing to settle on just one treat. George, the official chocolatier, came to the rescue and helped me pick out their best selection of treats.

As George took his time easing each one off the china display plates and placed them lovingly in a blue box, he went on to explain that those pots of honey over there, behind us on the central table, had been made by bee’s that were right now making the stuff on the store roof apiaries.

Wide eyed, I stood there mesmerized as George told me that Fortnum and Mason had their own beekeepers. I handed over my credit card to pay, and while I waited for George to run it I sniffed the box. I also splurged on one of the honey pots, thinking it would make a perfect gift for Dr. Finely.

This was the first shopping high I’d ever had.

I found a pyramid display of Christmas crackers. They looked like individually wrapped oversized candy wrappers. They were ridiculously expensive and I couldn’t quite see the purpose of them. Still, Cameron had asked me to get them, so I placed a box into my shopping basket.

Strolling around the coffee and tea store, I breathed in the rich scent of beans and leaves all mixed up into a delicious combination. These caffeine and decaf teas were offered as teabags or loose leaves. Their expensive price tags proved these were the very best money could buy.

Stunned, I blinked at the shelves.

The Cole name was stamped on packets of tea that ran along their own shelf. My gaze drifted along the display until it fell on a luxury selection of coffees with the same exact insignia. A Swirling italic T and a C.

My thoughts flashed back to that coffee house we’d stopped outside yesterday when Cameron had hopped out the car and bought us all drinks. I recognized the logo from the store front as well as the cups. I thought back to all those coffee houses back in American carrying the same branding.

Oh. My. God.

Cameron’s family also owned ‘Tempest Coffees.’

No wonder Richard hinted at Cameron being a billionaire.

How many times had Bailey and I stopped off in one of those stores and bought ourselves a coffee. They were everywhere, on every corner. You couldn’t go three blocks without seeing a Tempest Coffee House.

Funnily enough, that first day I’d sipped Earl Grey with Cameron, right after I’d accidentally backed into his car, he’d taken me into a competing Coffee Bean. Perhaps it had been his way of hiding his secret from me.

I made my way toward the escalator, nervous Shay night have caught my reaction to this revelation. Shay and Cameron both knew I had no idea about the coffee side to Cameron’s family business. Now it all made sense. Tea was big business, but coffee ruled the market when it came to hot beverages.

And the son of the Cole family had just royally fucked me up on the London Eye. No wonder Shay was so nervous. This wasn’t just about riling up Lance. It was about the risk Cameron had taken of exposing his family to scandal.

I reached into my box of chocolates, took one of them out, and shoved it into my mouth. I tried to hide the fact I was having a mouth orgasm, gazing off lovingly at nothing much during my out of body experience. This stunning creamy softness melted on my tongue. Chocolate really was a close second to sex.

Cameron and I definitely had our worship of chocolate in common.

I tried to shake off this new nugget of intel on the great Cameron Cole, reminding myself I still had shopping to do.

I visited the stationery section, menswear, and even stopped off in what was called the haberdashery. So far, so good. I was on a roll with the gifts.

Next I jumped onto the escalator and headed up to the second floor, to the perfumery. The scent of rich musk hung thick. A pungent aroma. Line upon line of glass cases were filled with foreign named fragrances--all of them the high end kind.

Sniffing away at the samples, I moved along to the bottle of Amelia Eau de Perfume, and it made me swoon. I let my nose hover over a Chanel then sprayed a Vera Wang perfume into the air and ‘Princess’ wafted. Finding the smallest and least expensive bottle of Vera Wang, I placed it in my shopping basket.

“No, no,” said a husky voice.

She was stunning.

The tall, slim brunette had her hair pulled taut in a pony tail. She wore a low cut, cream silk blouse tucked into a short pencil skirt, along with a thin black belt. That line of diamonds along her neck screamed money. Her shopping basket was empty.

She reached into mine and took out the Vera Wang. “Too young for you,” she said in a French accent.

“Excuse me?” I glanced around, self-conscious.

She placed the bottle onto the counter. “Christmas crackers? How divine.”

“For Christmas dinner,” I said softly.

She gave a beautiful smile. “Are you cooking?”

“No, my friends are. I’m helping.”

She glanced at my ring finger. “Your husband?”

“Boyfriend. My friends and I plan to have everything ready by the time he arrives.”

She looked around. “Where’s he now?”

“Flying in from the States.”

“Ah, young lovers together for Christmas.” She reached for a square bottle of Shalini, tipped it, and then lifted out the glass stopper and brought it up to my nose. “Better, yes?”

I sniffed the floral fragrance. “It’s lovely.”

It smelled soft and alluring.

“Over four hundred dollars per ounce,” she said. “But worth it.”

I lowered my gaze.

“Spoil yourself.” She pouted. “The scent of a flower in bloom suits you.” She traced the tip of the stopper along my neck and slid it lower, tickling as she went, following my cleavage. “It blends with your skin.”

I was frozen to the spot, hypnotized by her sensuality. She reminded me of the ‘girls’ back at Enthrall. Those confident dominatrixes who shared this woman’s love of expensive fragrances and, like them, oozed sexuality.

Her gaze fixed on my lips as she traced the glass stopper beneath my blouse, along the line of my bra, beneath the cup now, and edging it around my areola—

Sparking arousal.

Flushing wildly, I stepped back. “I’ll see how it smells on me later. Maybe I will get it.”

“It compliments you.” She gestured to the bottle of perfume and turned to the cashier. “I’ll take one of these.”

She’d handed over her credit card and paid for a bottle of Shalini, her left hand resting on the arch of my spine.

Trying to cool my blushing and come up with words to politely extract myself from this overly zealous European, I pretended to check out another perfume.

Her purchase was handed back to her in a shiny blue bag.

She dropped the bottle into my basket. “A gift.”

“No, I couldn’t possibly—”

“Mia,” she cooed. “A blossoming flower is better suited to pleasure, wouldn’t you agree?”

My breath stuttered.

“Yet your master prefers inflicting pain on you.”

“Mrs. Merrill?” I said, only now recalling that photo of her next to her husband when I’d Googled him. She’d been younger and wearing her hair down.

“Our arrangement is not what you think,” she whispered. “It’s about my husband and I spoiling you. Taking care of you for a week. We’ll treat you to anything you like. Anything at all. And in exchange you promise to be a good girl.”

“I have to go.”

“I’ll pamper you, Mia, make you feel like—” She nudged aside that bottle of Vera Wang—“like a princess.”

A stern looking Shay approached. “Hello, Helete. What a coincidence.”

“Shay,” she purred. “You look well.”

“As always, you look stunning.”

Her gaze took in his body. “It’s been a while.”

“Doing your husband’s bidding?” he said.

She stood straighter. “I was inviting Mia over to spend some time with us.”

“She’s busy.”

“Have you tainted her opinion?”

“I have a great deal of respect for you, Helete,” he said. “Lance and I go way back. But this is out of character for him. For both of you, actually.”

“Shay, send your master my regards,” she said. “I’m surprised he doesn’t have you collared too.”

He glanced my way. “Ready, Mia?”

“Here’s my business card.” She reached for my handbag, opened it, and slid her card inside. “If you should want for anything.” The tip of her tongue rested on her teeth, all flirty and revealing.

“She’d be bad for your husband’s political aspirations, Helete,” said Shay.

“Hardly,” she said. “The results will be invigorating.”

I reached into my basket and lifted out that bag containing the perfume and placed it on the counter. “Thank you for the gift, Mrs. Merrill, but I can’t keep it.”

“You want to continue smelling like a little girl?” She gestured to Shay. “I imagine your dom prefers that?”

“I have to go,” I said.

“It really is a pleasure to meet you finally, Mia.”

“Please,” I said. “Can you let this go? It’s getting kind of weird.”

Shay grinned. “From the mouths of babes.”

“She’s exquisite, isn’t she Shay?” Helete pouted. “I imagine you’re having trouble keeping it your pants, knowing you.”

“Good to see you too, Helete.”

She looked triumphant. “Master Cole’s not the only expert in pain, Mia. You’ll soon discover this fact if you force our hand. My advice: come willingly.”

I hurried over to stand beside Shay.

“Take care, Helete,” he said. “Oh, and Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas,” she called after us. “We’ll see you soon, Mia. I’ll expect your call.”

Shay grabbed my arm and led me away.

We rode the escalator down in silence.

I hurried out and headed over to a cashier.

He stood back and watched me place my gifts on the counter. “You okay?” he said.

“Of course.” I reached for my purse. “Why?”

“Oh I don’t know, maybe it has something to do with having just bumped into the BDSM equivalent of—”

“A Velociraptor in heat,” I said.

“Couldn’t have put it better.” Shay feigned fear. “That bitch leaves scars.”

I felt this tension dissolving. “Thank you for stepping in.”

“Plan B was to throw you at her and run.” He winked.

I burst out laughing.

The shop girl was riveted with our conversation, though when she realized our attention was now on her she busied herself placing my gifts into shopping bags.

Despite Helete trying to sabotage my morning, I’d actually done well on my shopping and also prided myself on telling Mrs. Merrill just how strange her behavior was.

I handed over my credit card.

“Don’t need that,” said the pretty cashier, waving my card away.

“I just used it to buy these.” I held up my box of chocolates.

“Your shopping’s paid for.”

“You didn’t run my card.” In a panic, I looked around for Helete. “I need a receipt.”

“Here you go.” She handed it over. “Thank you for shopping at Fortnum and Mason.”

I studied my receipt.

“We hope to see you again soon.”

I read it, recognizing Cameron Cole’s American Express number. He’d paid for my tattoo back when my life was messed up.

It still was, but in an entirely new way.

The cashier beamed. “All taken care of, ma’am.”

“But he can’t,” I said, glaring at Shay. “These are presents from me.”

“Don’t make a fuss,” he said.

I turned back to face the cashier. “Can you please cancel the payment and use this?” I showed her my card.

“It’s already gone through.”

Shay glanced at his watch. “Let’s go.”

“Not until I pay for my own gifts.”

Shay took the bags from the cashier and she melted in his wake, her face crimson from what she probably thought was him flirting with her and was merely a Shay smile.

He cocked his head for me to follow him out.

“Are you going to tell Cameron about seeing Helete?” I asked.

Shay scoffed.

“Will he be angry?”

“Depends on what you two ladies were talking about?”

Oh no. I’d let it slip about Richard flying in.

“Spill,” said Shay, giving a nod of thanks to the doorman who ushered us out onto the street.

We stepped into the cold morning air. Our car waited curbside.

“I told her we were all having dinner together tonight,” I said nervously.

“It’s not your fault, Mia. However, next time remain guarded. Tell strangers nothing and signal for me.”

“How long will you be guarding me?”

He nudged me into the back of the car. “Indefinitely.”

“What?” I said. “I mean, excuse me. I mean what the fuck?”

“Wind your neck in,” said Shay, faking an English accent and taking the tension down a notch.

I wasn’t going to let Mrs. Merrill taint my Christmas. I pushed all thoughts of her out of my mind and stared out, enjoying the decorated store fronts and the last minute shoppers who didn’t actually look like they were having any fun.

I nagged Shay until he relented and let me stop off at an ATM. He stood there right beside me, acting as though I was about to be mugged at any moment.

“Sorry you have to work at Christmas,” I said.

“Hanging with you isn’t work,” he said. “It’s fun.”

I withdrew the cash equivalent to what I’d just placed on Cameron’s card. I shoved it into my purse.

We drove across London with Shay focusing on texting away on his phone and me taking in the surrounding scenery.

“Won’t Arianna be upset you’re not with her for Christmas?” I asked him.

“She’s spending it with her family,” he said. “We’re going to have some time together over the New Year.”

That sat better with me. I didn’t want to think I had anything to do with separating lovers or being the cause of ruining anyone’s Christmas.

Within half an hour, Shay instructed our driver to park behind that familiar swanky Rolls Royce Ghost. Shay escorted me over to it.

Cameron waited inside.

I waved goodbye to Shay, but something told me he wouldn’t be far away. He made an art of keeping his distance.

“How did it go?” asked Cameron, smiling.

He was wearing a long, black coat, that five o’clock shadow now hinting at a beard.

I settled into the leather seat next to him. “How did what go?”

“Shopping.” He leaned forwards, reached for my seatbelt, and snapped it in. “You smell nice. New perfume?”

“Didn’t buy it. It’s some slutty French thing.”

His gaze stayed on me. “I like it.”

The car pulled away from the curb and merged into traffic.

“How was your morning?” I asked.

“Great. We’re all set for dinner tonight.” He glanced at his watch. “We just have time for one more stop.”

“Where are we going?”

“What’s this?” Cameron looked down at the hundreds I was offering him. “Are you paying me for sex? Good God, Mia, you’ll have to do better than that.”

“Very funny. No, you accidentally paid for my shopping at Fortnum and Mason. I’m paying you back.”

“I’m not taking your money.”

“But it’s okay for me to take yours?”

“Consider it a perk.”

“I was embarrassed. I went to pay and the cashier told me you’d taken care of it.”

Confusion marred his face. “It didn’t make you happy?”

“The gesture was very sweet—”

“You’re welcome.”

“Please take this.” I shoved the money towards him. “Otherwise it’s you buying gifts for you and I haven’t bought you anything.”

“I was pleased to do it.”

“Well I’m not.”

His expression softened into kindness.

“I’m not backing down on this.” I shoved the money towards him.

He raised his hands to avoid it.

“Please, sir.”

“How much is here?”

“Six hundred.”

“That’s the wrong amount for a start.”

I went for my bag to check the receipt.

“If we’re going to do it the Mia way, you owe me more than six hundred dollars.”

I frowned at him.

“The shopping came to six hundred,” he said. “The car and driver came to over two thousand dollars.” He raised his hand to stop my reply and pulled out his phone. “The exchange rate sucks. Let’s calculate it. The cost of having Shay escort you.” Cameron’s thumb slid across his screen. “He doesn’t come cheap. His men, well we’re adding on another fee right there.”

His men? How many of them were following me?

Cameron tapped away. “And as we utilized the latest in satellite tracking to follow your pretty little ass all over the store, well, quite frankly that fee is extortionate. You wouldn’t believe how much ass tracking costs.”

I put my hands on my hips. “How much?”

“For you? Too much.”

“Run my card, please.”

“How does your limit look?”

“This isn’t funny. This is important to me.” I held out the money.

He pulled the notes from my fingers and shoved them into my handbag. “What’s this?”

Oh hell, he’d found Helete’s business card.

“She had the nerve to give you her card?” He shook his head.

“Shay told you then?”

“He texted me. Told me you’d had the pleasure.”

Of course. It had been Cameron that Shay had been texting in the car.

“She didn’t scare you, did she?” he asked.

“No. I’m surprised Lance isn’t satisfied with just his wife. She’s a looker.”

“God, you can be adorable sometimes.”

“Only sometimes?”

He rolled his eyes.

“I’m afraid I let it slip we’re all having Christmas dinner together. I didn’t realize who she was at first.”

“Forget you ever met her.”

“I’m trying.” I gazed down at Helete’s gold embossed business card, and beyond that the cash resting at the bottom of my purse. “This is about me making you happy. This is about me doing something for you for a change. This is about Christmas.”

“Mia—”

“I don’t want your money. I want y—.” I blushed wildly. “I want to make you happy.”

He arched a brow knowingly. “See anything else in the store?”

“Only those Cole teas and coffees.”

“It was only a matter of time before you discovered my dirty little secret.”

“Secret?”

“My dad’s business sits nicely at the top of the Fortune 500.” He looked over at me. “Which means—”

“It’s never been a secret you’re well off.”

His eyebrows knitted together.

I ran through what I’d just said and cringed inwardly.

Cameron shrugged. “It’s my dad’s business.”

“Perhaps your brother might change his mind?” I said. “Take over the business so you can keep working as a doctor.”

“Doubt it.”

“Have you tried talking with him?”

“Yes.”

“And he refuses?”

“We fell out a few years ago and never reconnected. It’s his form of revenge.”

“Why would he be angry with you?”

Cameron pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Maybe it’s time you tried talking with him again,” I said.

“Henry’s even more disinterested than me,” he said. “For our parent’s twentieth wedding anniversary, my father purchased an island for my mother.” Cameron forced a smile. “A fucking island. I was still at university at the time. The other students never let me live it down. Henry was at West Point. He was even more humiliated. Once that news hit the press there was no going back.”

“Maybe your friends were jealous?”

“Henry uses his middle name now so as not to connect himself with the family. Not that it matters. He never comes out of that cabin.”

“How does he get food?”

“It’s delivered.”

“Is he lonely?”

He sat back and broke my gaze.

“Your parents are nice.” I shook my head. “It’s hard to believe they were okay with sending you away to school when you were so young. I’d never do that if I had a child.”

“I know you wouldn’t.”

“Still, not having money can be just as humiliating,” I said. “I imagine you’ve never needed for anything.”

“There really are some things money can’t secure.”

“Like what?”

“The happiness of everyone around me.”

All these years he’d had to fight for an ordinary life. Following his passion for medicine was proof of that. How, I wondered, would he ever know if a woman really loved him for who he was. Yes, he was beautiful, kind and passionate, but there would always be doubt.

His happiness meant everything to me.

More than my own.

The thought he might have suspected I’d spent all this time with him hoping to catch his eye and end up as Mrs. Cole for his money caused my stomach to twist. The cruelest betrayal of his trust would be that. I hated the idea he’d ever suspect that of me.

“Mia,” he said, taking my hand. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you. It’s only now that I—”

“I can’t wait to go back to Richard,” I blurted and turned my face away.

Cameron’s hand slipped from mine.

An awkward silence filled the space between us.

The car sped past a couple strolling hand in hand on the sidewalk. They looked so relaxed, so happy, so uncomplicated.

The burn of Cameron’s gaze stayed on me until I braved to look back at him. “I’m counting the minutes until I see him again.”

“He’s a lucky man,” he said softly.

“You were going to say something?”

“It’s not important.”

“I’m grateful for all you’ve taught me.” I made it sound cheerful. Upbeat even.

“We’ve been good for each other.”

“We’ll still see each other, right?”

He looked fazed. “We’re here.”

I peered out and caught sight of the Tower of London and swallowed hard.

“The last time we visited here it didn’t go so well,” he said. “I want to swap out that memory for something better. Something beautiful.”

“It was my fault.”

“I’d buried those feelings about Afghanistan so deep I’d forgotten why. With this recent introspection… ”

“I still feel terrible.”

“Don’t. I handled it wrong. The conversation didn’t need to be so infused with negative emotion. I caused you to worry about it and this is my way of righting a wrong. This is my way of saying sorry.” He placed a white box on my lap.

The entire charade here had been my fault. “I’d do anything to take yesterday back.”

“All forgotten now.” He gestured. “Open it.”

“I can’t until tomorrow.”

“Merry Christmas, Mia.” He lifted a similar box onto his lap. “They’re meant to be opened now.”

“I’ll accept this gift on one condition.”

“Let’s hear it?”

“You take my money for the gifts.”

“Give it to me later.”

That made me smile and I lifted the lid off the box. “Ice skates?”

“When I was a kid, ice skating at Christmas was a tradition. When I moved away from home I let that go. Family times were infrequent. I learned to cherish them.”

Having been sent to boarding school at five years old, he probably looked forward to trips home more than most kids. The thought of a lonely Cameron was too horrible to contemplate.

“It’s rather nice to revisit those memories.” He gazed out.

Oh God. I’d just shoved a fucking emotional spear right into his heart by mentioning Richard, and Cameron had planned a romantic afternoon for us.

My thoughts fell back on what he might have been going to tell me.

“I just don’t want anyone to get hurt,” I whispered.

“I know. Me neither.”

Running my fingers along the outside of the blade, I tried to find the words.

You’ve already told him.

He knows you love him.

“Mia, I’ll cherish our time together,” he said. “It’s hard to believe not that long ago you were that young woman I met in the coffee room. Wide eyed and innocent.”

“When I first met you,” I said, “you kind of scared me.”

“How about now?”

I gave a shake of my head. “Maybe you should let down your guard more. Let people in.”

“It’s getting easier.”

“I love my skates. Thank you.”

“Shall we try them out?”

“When?”

“Now. They have an ice rink here.” His face lit up and he gestured toward the tower. “Right here in this ancient fortress.”

He made it sound so romantic.

I’d only ever roller bladed before and those had been rusty old boots I’d found in a moldy box in the garage. I hoped I wasn’t about to turn Cameron’s romantic idea of the two of us elegantly floating on ice into him hauling me off to the ER.

“I’ll keep you safe,” he said, as though reading my mind.

His tone was laden with meaning.

As we stepped out, Christmas music carried over the castle wall, along with the sound of laughter and of skates slicing along ice.

Within minutes we’d pulled on our skates, leaving our shoes behind in the car, and made our way onto the rink.

A vastness of white faux ice was nestled in the hollow of the tower’s dry moat. An enormous decorated Christmas tree rose high at the end of the rounded out hollow, overlooked by the castle wall, and beyond that the castle turrets.

My breath left me…

At the center of the rink were cones laid out, and dancing within them talented skaters were allowed full rein. A few of them were performing fancy moves that in my head I knew I could pull off, only my shaky legs and sliding feet hadn’t gotten the ‘I too have Olympic skills’ memo.

Seriously, these skaters were gliding backwards and forwards, performing death defying pirouettes, and what looked like perfect double axels.

With Cameron’s hand firmly holding mine, he led me off to the edge, and after a few potentially hazardous slips and slides, I settled into the quick foot movement, each foot pushing off the ice with my blades. It even started to look like I knew what I was doing.

He was going to tell you he loves you, came my cruel inner tease.

And you sabotaged it.

Don’t think about that now.

Don’t.

I begged my imagination not to go there. That place where hopes and dreams stood a chance of coming true.

And I’d thought our time on the London Eye was surreal.

My feet found their rhythm and I matched Cameron’s strides, both of us in perfect unison as we skated around the outside with Jingle Bells playing. More experienced skaters whizzed by with a whoosh.

Of course Cameron skated like a pro. It made me wonder if his childhood had been all about mastering every single sporting activity known to man and learning to excel at each one. For goodness sake, he knew how to fence, play polo, do that fancy thing with breath control while swimming the butterfly, and fly a helicopter.

Not to mention his dreaminess in the bedroom.

Yet he’d failed to meet Mrs. Right.

A baffling concept, considering he seemed so perfect in every way.

Here we were, hand in hand, acting like two happy lovers just skating around the rink. In reality we were merely dragging out the pain of our impending separation as though we couldn’t bear to be apart, both of us willingly stretching out the inevitable and braving the ache of what was to come.

Be in the now, I soothed. Savor every last second of him.

A young skater flew by and bumped into my left arm, sending me off into a spin. Cameron reached out and nudged me away from the crowd.

A blur of lights and color. Music faded.

Screaming and laughing at the same time, I skidded in a wide circle and came back around, bumping right into Cameron’s chest.

“Whoa.” He laughed, his arms flailing for balance, his legs giving way as he tipped and slammed flat on his back.

I collapsed on his chest, giggling.

“Are you okay?” I said breathlessly.

“Now I am.” He cupped my face with his hands and kissed me, crushing his lips against mine, his tongue searching my mouth, forcing mine wider. His kiss alighted every sense, every cell, until all I knew was him.

We could have been anywhere. Both of us lost awareness that we weren’t alone.

The sound of skates came a little too close; a spray of ice hit us. “You two okay?” a woman asked in a Louisiana accent.

I opened my eyes to see a middle-aged woman peering down at us.

“We’re fine, thank you,” said Cameron.

“Could you two look any more perfect for each other,” she said, and threw her head back in a laugh before skating off.

My gaze shot to Cameron’s.

“It’s probably a good thing you’re not mine,” he said.

“Why?”

“I’d possess you beyond all understanding.”

I sagged against him, resting my head on his chest.

“You will never submit to any man the way you submit to me.” His tone was firm and masterful.

I raised my head to look at him. “No, I won’t.”

“Finally, the truth.”

The unfairness of his manipulation soaked into my bones, along with the chill of the ice.

“You will submit to Richard for me, understand?” he said firmly. “Whenever you have doubt, replace it with the knowledge you do everything he asks of you for me.”

“Cameron—”

“You please me when you please him.”

“What about us?” I whispered.

“The only reason for us was to take you to the level of excellence you needed to obtain. For Richard. Your one true master.” He lowered his gaze. “You just confessed how you can’t wait to go back to him.”

I had, but for all the wrong reasons.

I’d wanted him to know it had never been his money I’d wanted. It had only ever been him. Didn’t he know how damn gorgeous he was? That he was beautiful, gifted, and brilliant?

That he’d saved my life?

His eyes held mine, as though waiting for my response.

I couldn’t fail him now. Not after all he’d done for me, given me, expected of me.

Cameron had always been honest. The only confusion of my role had come from me.

“When I told you I love you,” I muttered, “what I meant was I love how you’ve crafted me to please Richard. I am well prepared, sir.”

“And you promise to obey him in all things?”

“Yes.” A little dazed, I added, “I promise to make you proud.”

“This pleases me,” he said darkly, his breath on my lips. “I believe I’ve excelled all expectations.”

CHAPTER 20

I CHANGED MY outfit again.

This time I went for semi-casual—skinny jeans and a Donatella Versace blouse that had miraculously turned up in my closet.

We’d spent the rest of the afternoon with me in the sitting room, placing those gorgeous blue baubles on the tree, and Cameron helping me hang blue tinsel around it. After we’d hung the Christmas lights around the branches and turned them on, it looked magical.

I couldn’t stop looking at it.

We moved into the kitchen and began preparing food for tonight’s dinner, with me peeling vegetables as well as a large bowl of apples for dessert, and Cameron following a Barefoot Contessa recipe to prepare a chicken. Shay had helped out where needed, and with all three of us hanging out in the kitchen we’d had a lovely afternoon.

Inside, I was a mess.

Richard’s plane had landed at Heathrow and he was on his way.

I loved him with all my heart but my mind was riddled with confusion.

Richard’s insistence he hand me over to Cameron to train into this lifestyle had been risky, as though my heart wouldn’t waver like it did for my new master versus my old.

My whirlwind romance with Cameron was over, along with all these glamorous experiences we’d shared, or even us hanging out downstairs cooking together.

I wandered over to the closet and pulled out a red dress on a hanger. The same outfit I’d warn when Cameron had pretended to be handing me over to Lance.

A chill ran up my spine when I thought of it. I still had his wife’s business card in my bag and had a good mind to phone her up and tell her to leave me alone. I wanted no part of their high roller stakes game.

A knock came and the door opened.

“Can I come in?” asked Cameron.

His face was cleanly shaven now, as though he too was trying to forget the last few days of what had felt more like an affair.

“I can’t decide what to wear,” I said, holding up the dress.

“What you’ve got on is fine,” he said. “It’s Christmas eve. Very relaxed.”

I placed the dress back in the wardrobe.

“I came to check on you,” he said. “How are feeling?”

“Nervous.”

“It’s excitement,” he said. “Richard knows London better than me. You’re both going to have fun.”

I reached out to touch his face.

Cameron’s fingers wrapped around my wrist and he gently pulled my hand away and he kissed it. Then let go.

“Of course. I’m sorry,” I said.

He shoved his hands into his pockets.

“Thank you for everything,” I said.

“Hey guys!” shouted Shay from downstairs. “Richard’s car’s here.”

My gaze held Cameron’s.

“Richard’s the best man I know,” he said. “He’s kind and patient, and understanding, and he made sure you had everything you needed to free yourself from pain, even with the consequence of him suffering the loss of you, for you. Loving someone this much is profound. Go make him happy.”

“Yes, but—”

“Obey every command.”

“But what if—”

“Every one of them.”

I hesitated, the words I so desperately searched for evading me.

“Go to him now, please,” he said. “Quickly.”

I headed out.

“Mia.”

I turned back to look at him. My fingers curled around the door handle.

“Remember to honor everything I’ve taught you.”

“Yes, sir.”

“You please me when you please him.”

My feet remained frozen where I stood. “In the car outside the Tower of London, what were you going to tell me?”

He stepped forwards and cupped my face in his hands, his lips hovering dangerously close to mine but not touching.

My entire body alighted by his firm touch, his closeness.

“Cameron—”

“Go,” he said, breaking away.

I hesitated.

“Now,” he yelled.

I ran.

Down the stairs, through the living room and through the hallway, running right into Richard’s arms.

CHAPTER 21

RICHARD HUGGED ME tight, lifting my feet off the ground and spinning me around, and our laugher lessened the tension.

Cameron, Shay, and I escorted him into the living room. Richard shoved the handle of his suitcase down.

His tan had faded a little and he looked fresh from the flight, those designer ripped jeans and black sweater giving him that familiar, edgy look.

“How is everyone?” His deep blue eyes crinkled into another smile.

“Everyone’s great,” said Cameron.

“Welcome to London,” said Shay.

“Could it be any fucking colder?” said Richard, peering over at the decorations. “Good job on the tree. Did you decorate it, Mia?”

“Yes, with help.” I looked over to Shay and Cameron.

“The place looks great,” said Richard.

I stepped forwards and fell into his arms again, needing to know I had what it took to make him happy. I threw a wary glance at Cameron, hoping to see I pleased him.

He gave a nod of approval.

“We’re enjoying your pokey little house,” said Shay, giving Richard a pat on the back.

“What can I tell you,” said Richard, patting Shay back. “This part of London’s exorbitant.”

“How was the flight?” asked Cameron.

“Not bad for a private jet. Not bad at all.”

Cameron rolled his eyes, clearly amused. “We missed you, buddy.”

“I’ll take your case up,” said Shay.

“No you won’t,” said Richard. “I’ve got it.”

“I insist. We want to get you settled as soon as possible so we can start drinking.”

“Well in that case,” said Richard. “Who am I to stop the fun?”

Shay grabbed the handle of the suitcase, tipped it, and rolled it towards the stairs. He headed on up with it.

“How have you been?” asked Richard, as his gaze fell on me.

“Fine. We’re so happy you’re here now.”

He gave a nod, his attention falling on Cameron. “What are you cooking? It smells amazing.”

“Rosemary chicken,” said Cameron. “Your favorite. Nothing like a home cooked meal. And Mia’s prepared an apple crumble especially for you.”

“Well I peeled the apples,” I said.

“And you made the crumble,” said Cameron.

“With your help.” I blushed.

“I made a promise to the United Nations that Mia wouldn’t ever cook again,” said Richard. “You’ve undone all my hard work to establish world peace.”

I thumped his arm.

He threw his head back in a laugh.

“Champagne?” said Cameron. “Unless you’d prefer water?”

“Bolly’s great,” said Richard.

Cameron reached into the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of Bollinger. He set about uncorking it.

“So,” began Richard, “you decided not to lay low?”

Cameron placed three glasses on the bar. “I took Mia to a few places of interest.”

The champagne fizzed and sparkled and frothed to the top of each flute.

“Cheers.” Richard took one of them and handed it to me. He took another for himself.

“We went to the Tower of London,” I said.

Cameron shot me a cautious glance.

“Very nice,” said Richard.

“How’s Winston?” I asked.

“Missing you,” he said, taking a sip.

I missed that cute mutt too. “Is Scarlet dog sitting?”

“Yes, I told her she can take him to the office. He gets a little antsy when I go away for a few days. How was The Tower?”

“A little scary at first.” My stare shot to Cameron’s. “In a good way.”

A full spectrum of memories flooded me: the dungeons, that dreadful reveal about Cameron’s time in Afghanistan, and just this morning us ice skating on the moat.

“Mia’s desperate to go on a double-decker bus,” said Cameron.

“We can do that.” Richard turned to Cameron. “I’ll take her on the Eye.”

Cameron went to say something and chose not to.

“You took her on the London Eye?” asked Richard.

My face blushed wildly.

“Any word from Lance?” asked Richard sternly.

The mention of that name had me taking several large gulps of champagne.

“Let’s chat later,” said Cameron. “You just got off a long flight.”

My back stiffened as the tension rose.

Richard flashed a wary glance my way. “Apparently you had dinner with him? And you took Mia.”

“And you know this how?” asked Cameron.

“Lance texted me,” said Richard. “He was pissed the dinner didn’t go down so well. Mentioned something about unruly behavior. About you not controlling your sub.” Richard gave a reassuring smile. “Good for you.”

“Your meeting with him didn’t go down too well either,” said Cameron.

“We agreed to disagree.”

“He’s in London,” said Cameron.

“Really.” Richard blinked at him. “Other than the threats, I had a great evening with Lance and Helete.” He looked over at me. “Helete’s his wife.”

I gave a nod I knew that.

“They were happy and relaxed,” said Richard. “He’s excited about his campaign.” He gave a mischievous grin. “I even offered to donate to it.”

“Good for you,” said Cameron. “How did dinner end?”

“With me telling them Mia’s my girlfriend. I offered them another sub.”

“And?”

Richard looked over at me. “I warned Lance if he threatened me again I’d sabotage his campaign. I made it a joke.”

“How did he react?”

“Apparently Lance has a friend at the New York Times itching to do a piece on me. The fallen son and all that. He wants to out my hedonistic lifestyle.”

“What did you tell him?”

“If he exposed me to my father’s enemies, his political career would be over.”

“Fantastic,” said Cameron dryly.

“And then Lance threatened to take you down,” said Richard. “I reminded him he has no power over us.”

“Which catapulted him to London,” said Cameron.

“They have a house here,” said Richard. “How did you do? No better apparently. You had dinner with them?”

“Helete wasn’t there,” I said. “I bumped into her when I went Christmas shopping this morning.”

Richard’s gaze scanned beneath the Christmas tree. “Where?”

“Fortnum and Mason,” I said.

Richard looked horrified.

“We’re trying a different tactic,” said Cameron.

Richard motioned for Cameron to go on.

“I told him he can have Mia. For a week.”

Confusion marred Richard’s face.

Cameron made a gesture. “And then Mia offered her opinion on the matter. Lance left the restaurant shell shocked.”

“I merely defended myself,” I said.

Richard’s lip curled into a smile. “I’m not sure whether to be disturbed or delighted.”

I moved toward the bar and reached for the champagne bottle.

Cameron took it from me and poured a fresh glass of bubbly into my flute. “There you go.”

“Steady on, Mia,” said Richard.

“It’s Christmas,” said Cameron.

“Still,” said Richard. “Addiction runs in her family.”

My stare lowered in shame.

“My only concern for Mia,” said Cameron, “is her ferocious behavior around candy. That girl will take your hand off if you’re holding a piece of chocolate.”

I giggled at that, though my smile faded when I caught Richard’s glare.

“Someone has to watch out for you, Mia,” said Richard. “It’s because I love you that I’m hard on you. You know that.”

I took another sip.

“Mia, what did you say to Lance to scare him off then?” asked Richard.

“That I didn’t want to go with him.”

“And?”

“She made a scene,” said Cameron.

Richard looked amused. “So, by making him believe I think less of her, that devalues her?”

“So far, so good,” said Cameron. “And no message from him since.”

“I wouldn’t say that,” said Richard.

I held my breath, waiting on Richard’s next words.

Cameron leaned on the bar. “Go on.”

Richard reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. “These are from him.” He handed his phone over.

Cameron scrolled through what looked like photos on the screen. “This explains your mood.”

“Quite the collection,” said Richard.

Cameron’s gaze rose. “Our friendship is stronger than this.”

“Without question,” said Richard. “What was going on between you both in Harrods?”

“Rounding out her education,” said Cameron. “She’s more than ready for you.”

“His men were tracking you through London,” said Richard.

“I know.”

And although I’d suspected it, I knew for sure now.

Richard gestured for his phone back.

I crossed my arms over my chest. “What kind of photos?”

Cameron handed Richard’s phone back. “Just us hanging out, Mia.”

“Did Lance send those?” I asked.

“Yes,” said Cameron.

“What happened to keeping a low profile?” said Richard.

“I refuse to play Lance’s games,” said Cameron.

“Or are they your games, Cam?” said Richard darkly. “This wasn’t the plan.”

“Did those photos put you in this shitty mood,” said Cameron. “For God’s sake, lighten up.”

“And how would you have responded?” asked Richard.

“I’d discuss my concerns.”

“Which we’re doing.”

“Well good.”

“You could take Lance out in one strike,” said Richard. “Everyone is waiting for you to take your final aim and stop this madness.”

“Out of the question,” said Cameron, pointing. “This is non-negotiable.”

“He’s threatening you,” said Richard. “In the worst kind of way. Think of this as damage control—”

“Mia, go and unpack Richard’s case,” said Cameron. “Please.”

A shudder ran up my spine.

“Mia,” said Cameron sternly.

I went to leave.

“Wait, Mia,” said Richard. “Is she ready?”

“There’s a detail we need to discuss,” said Cameron. “In private.”

“In front of her.”

Cameron stared at him.

“Did you do your job?” said Richard.

“Don’t be an ass.”

“It trumps you being a bastard,” said Richard. “I’m experiencing a heavy dose of fucking déjà vu. The day before you left for London, I had to extract my girlfriend from your house. I know I messed up at the auction, but is this really fair?”

“I’ve kept her safe.”

“You’ve not so much as derailed the plan as made up a new one.”

Cameron poured himself another glass.

“It’s not that I don’t get it,” said Richard. “I do. But I’m not backing down on this. Ever.”

“And you shouldn’t have to,” agreed Cameron.

“I don’t want to see you get hurt either, Cam,” said Richard. “I can’t bear to think of your heart—”

“This is what I do.” Cameron pointed at me. “I’m proud of the results.”

Richard turned to face me. “You’re ready for what I have to show you?”

Cameron cringed. “Nice and slow, Booth.”

“If she’s ready then we’re all good, right?” said Richard. “She’ll handle anything I ask her to do.”

“Let’s talk this through calmly,” said Cameron.

“She’s still looking at you like you’re her master,” said Richard.

“Champagne,” said Shay, bouncing back into the room. “What a great way to kick off Christmas.”

“Shay.” Richard handed him a glass. “Take Mia to the playroom, please.”

Shay looked confused. “You just got here.”

“Mia,” said Richard. “Shay will prepare you. Go with him.”

“Now?” Shay sounded doubtful.

“I need you to take Mia into the playroom,” said Richard. “Simple enough.”

Cameron clutched the edge of bar, his knuckles white.

Richard looked incredulous. “Well?”

“I work for Cameron,” said Shay.

“You work for Enthrall too,” said Richard. “I’m an equal partner.”

“Why don’t you freshen up?” said Shay. “Dr. Finely will be here in an hour.”

“Richard, what did Lance say to you exactly?” said Cameron.

Richard stepped toward him, that silent language between them startlingly uncanny.

Cameron shook his head. “He’s manipulating you.”

“Is he?”

“Yes,” said Cameron. “We’ve been waiting for you to arrive. Mia went out and bought your Christmas present.”

Richard set his glass down.

“And Shay,” I said. “I got him one too. And I bought honey from Fortnum and Mason for Dr. Finely. Did you know they have their own bee keepers? They work right up there on the roof of the store.”

“She really has been looking forward to you arriving,” said Shay. “It’s all she’s talked about.”

Richard looked distraught.

“Fuck this.” Cameron rounded the bar and grabbed my arm. “I’ll take her myself for you.” He took my glass off me and set it on the bar.

He hurried me out, shoveling me along the hallway and nudging me down the stairs.

Cameron kicked open the playroom door.

“In,” he snapped.

I tripped and he caught me, hugging me into his chest, clutching me to him, refusing to look at me.

Seconds dissolving…

He broke away and yanked me toward the Saint Andrew’s Cross, which was now righted. The room had been put together and tidied and those whips and chains were back in their place.

He slammed the door shut and flew back towards me.

“Obey,” he snapped.

Obediently, I relented and gave myself over.

The pinch of leather straps secured around my wrists. “Mia, what I’m about to say is very important. Don’t respond. Don’t answer. Just listen. Do you think you can do that?”

“Yes.”

“I doubt you can, but give it a go.”

A bite of my lip was needed as a reminder to stay quiet.

“You falling in love with me is my fault,” he said. “A misjudged step in your training. Interestingly enough, I too am deeply fond of you. Not only is it unexpected, it’s extraordinarily inconvenient. These feelings came out of nowhere and I’m finding them rather unpleasant.”

I yanked at the cuffs.

He leaned into me, both hands gripping either side of the crisscrossed bar. “I can’t stop thinking about you. My heart aches when I’m not around you. When we fuck, I can’t take a deep breath in.”

My heart took off, beating frantically, these sweeping emotions causing my breath to still…

He raised his hand. “I can use this. It’s useful. I’ll always cherish this time with you, and I’ll be able to use these biological reactions I’ve experienced for the good of others. So you see—” He checked my left cuff. —“there’s not been any waste in all these feelings. They serve a purpose.”

His confession stirred confusion, and in usual Cameron style this served as a punishment.

His lips lingered but didn’t touch.

His cologne roused memories…

Us in that grand palace, us in Harrods, us on the London Eye.

Us.

In this room, secured against my will, I had a sense of what those women back at the London Tower all those hundreds of years ago had felt. Their fates decided for them.

Cameron blinked at me. “Richard’s my best friend. We’ve known each other for so long now I can’t remember a time in my life when he wasn’t in it. I love him. With every cell of my being. Until I met you he was the most important person in my life. He’s loving, kind, and gentle. Yes, he has some interesting predilections. But I’ve prepared you for them. For him.”

He took a few short breaths, as though choosing his words carefully. “Richard was betrayed by his father and completely destroyed when his fiancé committed suicide. I brought him back from the brink.” Cameron reached for a leather strap and pulled it around my waist. “I won’t send Richard back there. I’d rather rip my own heart out then ever see him hurt again.”

“Cameron?” I whispered.

“I need you to listen.” He held my chin. “Your mother let you down by allowing her drug dealer near you, and later your father betrayed you beyond all understanding. You need to know what trust is. What kindness is. What doing the right thing is.”

His eyes were red and tired and he looked worn down. So unlike the Cameron I knew. The man with all the answers.

“This is the right thing.” He gave a nod, as though he’d found the words. “I will not be Richard’s father. I will not be that man that eviscerated him. I refuse to be someone who goes after what they want in spite of the debilitating effect it has on those they call family. And I refuse wholeheartedly to be like your father. A man who chose to satisfy his own heart and in doing so decimated those he left behind. I am a better man than that.”

“You’re nothing like them.”

“You promised you’d listen.” His expression was full of affection. “I need you to listen.”

A nod told him I would.

“On the plane here, I reassured you there’d be no further intimacy between us. I really believed it was something I could do. But you stir something in me that I’m unfamiliar with. I need time to analyze it. Work through it. What I’m trying to say is I let you down. I betrayed the trust I offered you. I was selfish. Please, forgive me.”

“There’s nothing to forgive.”

“Trust me. There is.”

“You think too much,” I whispered.

“It’s who I am.”

“Maybe you should just try feeling. It’s how you saved Richard. Maybe you should use that same technique on yourself.”

He gave a thin smile. “You saved Richard, Mia. You save him still.”

My heart fractured. Despite this ache, I tried to swallow this lump in my throat.

“You and I will never be a couple,” he whispered.

I peered up at him. “I’ll always be in your life.”

“I may be a masochist but I’m not into that kind of pain.”

“What are you saying?”

He wrapped his hands around my waist. “I just need to find the right time.”

“I’ll never be ready to not see you again.”

“Yes, you will,” he said, his lips moving close to mine but not touching. “I’ll make sure of it.”

Footsteps trailed down the stairs.

“I’ll be a good girlfriend,” I said. “But you must promise—”

Richard appeared in the doorway.

My gaze fell to the ground, fearing he’d know my heart was breaking.

“Mia, do you understand?” Cameron’s dark stare burned through me.

“Yes.”

“Are you’re ready to obey your master in all things?”

“Yes, sir.”

Cameron held my gaze for the longest time, as though gauging my readiness.

He stepped back and turned to face Richard. “She’s all yours.”

“Well thank you,” said Richard.

“I have one stipulation.”

Richard’s frown deepened.

“I know her limits,” said Cameron. “Despite my intensive work, she’s not ready to be shared with anyone.”

“She’s my fucking girlfriend,” said Richard.

Cameron shoved Richard back and pushed him up against the wall. They glared into each other’s eyes.

“Just say you won’t,” said Cameron.

After a long pause, Richard gave a nod.

Cameron stepped back and tugged at Richard’s sweater to straighten it. “I’m glad you’re here. I missed you, buddy.”

“Missed you too.”

Cameron patted his arm with affection and strolled away, heading out and up the stairs.

I willed him not to go, not to vanish like that, not to leave me.

Muddling through the confusion, I reasoned here was my beautiful boyfriend. The man I lived with, but for some reason I wanted to follow Cameron up those stairs, go with him, be near him.

“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he’d said. “My heart aches when I’m not around you.”

I wanted time alone to savor his words.

My heart betrayed everything I knew to be true.

“Ms. Lauren,” said Richard. “Please don’t zone out. I know subspace and this isn’t it.”

My breath stuttered. “Master.”

Richard closed the door and took those few short steps to reach me. “For the entire flight, I couldn’t stop thinking of you,” he said. “My cock ached for you, Mia.”

It was as though I was looking at him anew, trying to shake the remnants of the last few minutes, wanting, needing to rewind to yesterday.

“Mia,” said Richard, raising my chin with a fingertip. “These feelings are normal, okay? The transition back to a master after intensive training can be challenging. We take this into account. We make allowances.” His hand brushed over my jaw. “I’ll help you adjust. And if that doesn’t work…”

“What?”

“I’ll purge him from your mind.”

“Purge?”

“You begged me to take you on as my submissive. Remember?”

“I have to finish the apple crumble.”

He beamed at me. “God you’re so fuckable.”

“It’s all happening so fast.”

“Did he hurt you?”

My lips trembled. “No. Never.”

“I imagine he trained you well?”

I gave an uneasy nod, remembering Cameron’s warning that pleasing Richard would please him too.

“I’m here to help you through this,” he said.

“Just need a little time.”

“I warned you to stay away from me,” he said. “I fired you from Enthrall to protect you. That’s how hard I fell for you. My sweet, new secretary. My innocent Mia, who didn’t belong.”

“But—”

“He brought you back into our club. And then you pushed and pushed and begged to become mine. Being in this house is the consequence of your demands. This is me giving you what you want.”

My gaze shot to his.

“I warned you I’m too dark for you,” he said. “You’ve always insisted otherwise. Now I believe you, Mia. Want to know why?”

I gave a nod.

“You’ve been trained by a master. You’ve fulfilled the director’s expectations. I expect great things from you.”

“You’ve always been so patient with me.”

“At first I had reservations. I was concerned I might hurt you. Scare you. Damage you. After all you’ve been through I was certain you were too fragile. You’re stronger than I knew. And now I feel comfortable to push you beyond your limits.”

“I know you’d never hurt me.” It came out in a rush.

“I promise to be everything you need me to be. The strictest of masters.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Did you miss me?”

“Yes, I’ve so looked forward to you being here.”

He went to speak and stared off. “Then why did you only call me once? In all this time.”

“They took my phone off me.”

“You could have borrowed Shay’s or Cole’s.”

I turned my face away, full of doubt.

“Mia, we’re close to losing what we had. The promise of what we’re meant to be.”

“You gave me to him…” My voice fell away.

“And he released you from a lifetime of pain. His talent is unmatched. You feel the benefit of him, right?”

Oh, yes.

“Cameron’s seduced you beyond all understanding,” he said. “It’s what he does. It’s part of the process of training a high end sub. It’s happened to numerous submissives before who he’s trained. I’ve witnessed it. You’re no different. Don’t humiliate yourself with a worthless crush.”

“No, it wasn’t like that,” I burst out.

“I’d rather rip my own heart out…”

“Mia,” said Richard. “Cameron secured you in here for me and walked out. He didn’t even look back.”

My chest constricted as Richard’s raw words sliced through like cut glass.

“Baby, I’m fighting for you because I love you,” he said. “Do you see Cameron fighting for you?”

I met his deep blue eyes.

“You’re mine again,” he cooed. “My job is to protect you. Even from Cole. He’s a rogue. A very enigmatic, loveable rogue. Everyone falls for him. It’s not your fault. But any more time with him would devour you.”

I went to speak but couldn’t.

“Cameron doesn’t love you. He doesn’t want you. You see that, right?”

My thoughts ran over Cameron’s words, fearing they’d disappear into the ether, their meaning gone forever. Their truth lost.

“I should have had the balls to take you where you needed to go,” he said. “I’ll make it up to you. I’ll give you want you need.”

“You’ll go slow?”

“We’re beyond that. You’ve advanced to a higher level of play. It’s the only way I’ll get to keep you. I can’t do anything less than what Cameron has done to you. You told me what you need. I’m going to ensure you get it.”

My thoughts became hazy.

“You know what I think you believe?” He trailed a finger over my left breast, the tip circling my nipple. “You believe Cameron’s the one with the fucked up kinks. You think he’s the only one with a dark side. Well I’m looking forward to enlightening you.”

I held my breath as that pinch of my nipple became unbearable, that pang between my thighs sending a jolt of pleasure.

I gaped in pain and burst out, “Thank you, sir.”

“God you’re beautiful.”

“I’m your obedient servant, sir.”

“Can this be true?” he said, amused. “Is it really possible to prime Mia Lauren to this level of perfection?”

“I hope you deem me worthy, sir?”

He leaned into my ear. “Cameron’s not the only one who’ll make you pass out when you come.”

My body trembled; my breaths came short and sharp.

“Let’s go over your training,” he said. “What did you learn? Did you cover degradation?”

Oh no. Since arriving in London, all we’d done was have fun and fuck. Where had been the rounding out of my training as threatened? Cameron’s warning he’d take me the rest of the way had never happened. I couldn’t understand why.

And I couldn’t share that with Richard.

In his eyes was all that pain Cameron had spoken about, that veil of anguish from Richard’s past. His need to control everything was worn as a shield.

“Speak to me, Mia,” he said softly.

I knew his soul. Heard it’s yearning to truly love again. This good, kind, patient, and very scared young man.

“Kiss me master,” I said.

And he did. This fevered fight of lips became his way of drawing me back to him.

Cameron had unlocked within me the ability to see someone, actually see them, experience true empathy and sense beyond their smile, interpret their frown, feel their torment, no matter how much they tried to hide it.

And even though all Richard did was stand there now, solemn faced, trying to see if his kiss had felt the same, the truth spilled out that he doubted I could be the woman he needed me to be.

I’d been a source of pleasure for two very powerful men, but what moved me more was this revelation I’d also been their strength, their place of safety, their refuge.

Their way of forgetting.

Cameron had his demons too. I knew that now. He didn’t need any more regrets. More than anything I wanted to make him proud, please him, give him the peace of mind he deserved and let Cameron see I’d not be a burden to him.

A wave of calm swept over me.

“Sir, please untie me,” I whispered.

“Mia, I need you to list all you’ve learned.”

“Please, Richard, untie me so I can show you.”

First, my left wrist was set free and then my right. Then a tug of this strap around my waist released me.

“Well?” he muttered.

I lowered myself to the ground and bowed before him, my hair spilling out before me. “Master.”

Silence fell in the playroom.

When I finally peered up, it was to see Richard’s serene expression.

I rose to stand before him and cupped his face with my hands. “My darling, Richard. My master.”

“My sweet, slave.”

“This is what the director taught me,” I said. “That being a good submissive is not just about sex. It’s about reading my master’s feelings. Gauging what he needs. Fulfilling him on every level.”

Richard’s frown deepened.

Wrapping my arms around his waist, I gave him a well needed hug. “You fretted during that entire flight here,” I scolded him playfully. “Whatever Lance told you put you in a spin. Within seconds of arriving, your true feelings poured out. Your fear you’d lost me. You haven’t, Richard. I’m here.” I stepped back, took his hand, and pulled him across the room. “We’ve cooked dinner in celebration of you arriving. So, let’s get you freshened up and ready for Stephen’s arrival. We have an evening of eating and drinking and celebrating you being here.”

Richard pulled his hand from mine.

“Let me serve you,” I said, reassuringly. “Make you a drink.”

He hesitated by the door.

“You’re still very much in charge, sir,” I said. “This is just me taking care of my master. Me giving you what you need.”

Richard held his hand out and he looked like he was studying the meaning of the way I took it. I planted several kisses to his palm.

We walked hand in hand out of the playroom, and up.

Cameron and Shay chatted by the kitchen isle. They smiled as we past them.

“Everything okay?” said Cameron.

“Everything is wonderful, sir,” I told him.

“You tamed the beast,” said Richard dryly. “Looks like Ms. Lauren’s well trained after all. Quite promising.”

Cameron gestured across the room. “You remember Stephen.”

Dr. Finley stood close by and he was holding a box. “Hello again, Mia. Richard.” He held up the box. “I made a trifle.”

“You’re early,” Richard muttered.

Stephen peered over his round rimmed glasses. “By the look of things, I’m right on time.”

I let go of Richard’s hand and stepped towards Stephen. “We’re so happy you’re here.” Carefully I took the box from him. “I have no idea what a trifle is, but I for one can’t wait to taste it.” I beamed back at Richard, Cameron, and Shay.

Their faces were locked on me with fascination.

“It goes in the fridge,” said Stephen.

“May I get you a drink?” I asked him. “An aperitif perhaps?”

“I would love that.”

“I’m on it,” said Cameron, pouring Stephen a tall glass of champagne.

“Richard, why don’t you go and freshen up?” I said. “We’ll finish dinner off. I’ll bring you up a drink in a minute. How about that?”

Richard was staring at Cameron.

Cameron was staring at me.

And my inner muse was gaping at my convincing performance.

“We have Christmas crackers,” I told Stephen.

He looked amused. “The evening is saved.”

Cameron gave a wry smile and handed Stephen a flute of champagne.

“Thank you,” said Stephen. “I’m thrilled to be here. I’ve been looking forward to spending this evening with my delightful Americans,” he said. “Richard, I hear you’re Winston Churchill’s great, great grandson?”

“One of them, yes.”

“Then the honor is all mine,” said Stephen.

“Same nose,” said Cameron.

“You told me I have Churchill’s ears,” said Richard.

“Nose, ears, it’s all the same,” said Cameron with a smirk. “You’re still as handsome as him.”

Richard smirked, shaking his head as though used to Cameron’s ribbing.

Stephen stepped forwards and raised his glass. “My favorite Churchill story is when he was serving as prime minister.” He beamed at us. “It was back in the 1950s. Churchill was woken up by a staff member and informed of the scandalous event that had occurred in Saint James’s Park during the early hours of the morning. The staff member solemnly told the prime minister that a guardsman was found having sex with a male member of parliament in the bushes, by the police. ‘I’m afraid the scandal has already hit the newspapers, sir.’” Stephen pulled a face and mimicked Churchill, saying, “‘Last night? Wasn’t it damn cold last night?’ ‘Yes, sir, replied the assistant, it was one of the coldest February nights in Britain in over forty years.’” Stephen stood tall. “And Churchill replied, ‘Makes you proud to be British.’”

We all laughed, and what was left over of our tension lifted.

And I fell in love with Dr. Finley.

Richard excused himself and headed on upstairs.

“How was the ride over?” asked Shay.

“Lovely,” said Stephen, turning to Cameron. “Quite the drive in your Rolls Royce Ghost. What a car. It turned up at 6PM, though. Didn’t want to keep the driver waiting. That’s why I’m so unfashionably early.” He looked at me. “Hope I didn’t interrupt anything important?”

Cameron avoided my stare.

CHAPTER 22

VIEWING MY LOW cut, red chiffon dress in the mirror, I congratulated myself on handling this so well.

I really was flourishing as a submissive. Everything I’d ever dreamed of was coming true. This was really happening. If I could just nudge this nagging voice of resistance back in its box. Let go.

Completely hand myself over.

Fluffing my spiraling blonde curls, I used the full length mirror to adjust my cleavage, tugging my lace bra and admiring the way this dress swept over my curves and showed off my waist.

Cameron liked to put his hands around my waist, I mused, and it made me feel so feminine, so wanted, so beautiful.

“You’re the sacred feminine,” he’d wooed me.

Reassuring me time and time again this was what a woman represented to her dominant.

Don’t think of him.

I admired these strappy shoes complementing my outfit.

Richard would soon be out of the shower. Having changed my clothes for the third time, I now felt ready for this evening.

I’d found this exquisite dress in my wardrobe…

It’ll be okay.

You’ll be okay.

And so will Cameron. He had a career, those high society clubs, that privileged life to sustain him, and he also had all those beautiful subs waiting for his return.

He was right about Richard. He’d been through too much heartache for any man to bear--his father’s betrayal and the cruelty that followed, his girlfriend’s suicide, and him subsequently closing down his ability to feel, to love.

I’d been brought in to save the day.

Not destroy it further.

I hoped Richard might start to relax and enjoy being here. Soon, his fears would dissolve and his moodiness would lift.

He was my sweet, loveable Richard.

I was glad Cameron was still here to ease the transition.

Voices carried from downstairs.

Stephen, Shay, and Cameron sounded like they were already sparring with their intellectual banter. No doubt there would be plenty more stories from the enigmatic Dr. Finley. He was like the favorite uncle I’d never had, and if my prediction was right, very gay too.

And so fricken loveable.

Beneath this dress, I wore delicate stockings and a black lacey garter belt and panties. I decided not to wear shoes, preferring to go barefoot.

I’d brought up a glass of champagne for Richard, as well as a single chocolate covered strawberry on a china plate.

In the mirror’s reflection, I caught Richard staring at me from the bathroom doorway. I turned to face him, taking in that low hung towel wrapped around his waist, that tanned muscled torso rippling as he used another towel to dry his hair.

He oozed sun kissed sports god.

I wondered if he’d visited any of his old haunts while left alone in L.A., done any of those usual death defying sports he’d once been addicted too. That abrasion on his left arm was a hint he’d faced off with a rock.

“Wow, Mia,” he said. “I love that on you.” He ambled over and tipped my chin up and kissed me.

His cologne sparked my senses and brought a familiar rush.

“I found it in my wardrobe,” I said.

He pulled back.

“Shall I take it off?”

“No, baby, you look beautiful.”

“What happened to your arm?”

His fingertips trailed over the abrasion. “Malibu Creek State Park. Apparently you can’t forge new routes.”

“I wish you’d be more careful.”

“I don’t do boring, Mia. You know that. Why did you change?”

“This is my first Christmas eve dinner,” I said. “I want to look pretty.”

“You didn’t celebrate Christmas with Bailey?”

“She either gets Christmas off or New Year. She opts for New Year.”

Richard gave a look of sympathy.

“What did you mean by Cameron taking his final strike on Lance?” I asked.

“Cameron has some dirt on him.”

“Embezzling funds from his clients?”

“Lance covered his tracks. That’s off the table now. But the scandal surrounding his daughter is pretty juicy.”

“His daughter?”

“She got involved with a senator. It was a mess at the time. Cameron’s too much of a gentleman to betray Helete’s trust and tell Lance. Right now, Cole refuses to bring that nasty nugget out into the open.” Richard turned to face me. “I might have to for him.”

“What happened to his daughter?”

“His daughter didn’t respond well to her BDSM training. Incidentally, Lance still doesn’t know about it. Not sure he’d approve even if he is this heavily into it. By all accounts, it was pretty harsh what happened to her. Too harsh for nineteen.”

“Where is she now?’

He shrugged. “Seattle, I think.”

Seattle? Why did that sound familiar?

“What’s his daughter’s name?” I asked.

“Why?”

“Just wondering.”

“Isabella, I think.”

“Arabella?”

He frowned at me. “You know about it then?”

I tried to drag the remnants of the story back from when Cameron had mentioned it. Something about a young girl who he’d talked down off the roof of Pendulum. She’d threatened to jump. A nineteen-year-old who’d crumbled under pressure.

At that age, Pendulum would have been too much for me too, with all that unsupervised play and dark edged sex. Enough kinky fuckery to send any vulnerable girl over the edge.

“Everything okay?” He reached for his shirt.

“Yes, that story sounds familiar.”

“You’ll realize how small our world is, Mia. Guard what you say. Rumors carry faster than viruses.”

I handed him his shirt. “See, Cameron has new clothes for you too.”

“He can’t help himself.”

“Can I get you anything?” I said.

“The truth would be nice.”

Oh no, he wanted to do this now?

“About what?” I strolled over to the nightstand and lifted the strawberry off the plate. Nervously, I licked at the chocolate tip.

He watched me, seemingly amused.

I set the strawberry down. “What did you want to ask me?”

“Do you still feel the same about me?”

“Yes, more than anything.”

“Even after all this time you’ve spent with Cameron?”

“We talked about you all the time.”

“I’m sure you did.”

A flash of memories.

That bed over there.

That night.

Cameron sitting on the edge and tipsily sharing his feelings for me. Don’t think about that now, I warned myself, that’s the past.

“Will we be sleeping in here?” I said.

“No, the master bedroom.” He moved toward the mirror and buttoned his shirt. “Those photos were very revealing, Mia.”

“Was I naked in any of them?”

“I meant revealing of feelings. You stepped right into that one.”

I pulled back on a cringe, hating that Richard loved studying my every reaction, every blink. “I admire Cameron. He’s taught me a lot.”

“More than me?”

“You’ve taught me so much too. Both of you have. I’m grateful for everything. I want to please you so much.”

“Then stop thinking of him.” He fiddled with his cuffs.

“I fought against going with him. You gave me no choice.”

Richard turned. “Talk me to like that again and I’ll bend you over my knee and spank you in front of everyone.”

“In front of Dr. Finley?” I said. “You wouldn’t.”

“Don’t test me.”

“Sir.”

“Are you wearing panties?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Take them off.”

I knew what Richard was doing. He was acting as a sterner version of himself, competing with Cameron’s reputation. I couldn’t wait for him to return to the kinder, more patient version of himself.

Perhaps some part of him believed this was what I wanted, needed.

“What if Dr. Finley finds out?” I muttered.

“He’s gay.”

“Yes, but he’s very perceptive.”

“He doesn’t have X-ray vision. Take them off.”

I lifted my dress and eased off my panties.

“I thought the director went over with you about not answering back?” he said.

I held onto my panties until his glare became too much and then threw them onto the bed.

His glare was still on me. “Didn’t you go through water punishment to speed up your response times?”

Oh, yes, but that hadn’t gone down too well. I’d ended up kneeing Shay in the groin and getting fucked hard on the ground by Cameron in way of a punishment.

“You’ll obey me in all things, understand?” he said.

It was either that or run over and kick him in the balls like I’d done with Shay, in a well deserved act of rebellion.

Talk about Richard mirroring what he believed of me. He was the one who needed saving.

“Sir, I deserve any punishment you see fit,” I said, hoping that stare might let up.

Richard gave a crooked smile. “I see why you’re being so feisty now.” He lowered himself to his feet, kneeling before me, and lifted my dress. “Consider this a warning.” He leaned in, wrapping his arms around me, pulling me toward him, digging his fingers into my butt.

He planted several kisses onto my sex, his tongue brushing along my clit, circling, and making it thrum beyond pleasure.

Until I couldn’t stand it any more and I reached down and gripped his hair and held him there.

“Hands behind your back,” he said sternly, resuming his tongue’s possession of me.

Digging my fingers into my palms, clutching them tightly behind my back, I swooned, aching with guilt for betraying the one who didn’t want me any more.

On and on he swirled, taking me higher, bringing me closer. His titillation was soothing, as it reminded me of better times. Taking me back to our home in Malibu, our old life.

Richard pulled back and pushed himself to his feet. “Your punishment is to be left unsated.”

I swallowed hard. “Thank you, sir.”

“Did Cole take you through orgasm training?”

“I’m not sure.” There was that thirty minute climax Cameron performed on my clit back at Chrysalis. Somehow I didn’t think that’s what he meant.

“It’s not exactly something you forget,” he said.

“What does it involve?”

“Bringing you close to orgasm but not letting you come. Usually it lasts a few days. Most subs can’t take more than that.”

“What’s its purpose?”

“To train you to come on order.”

“I’d be honored if you’d take me through that, sir.” I made it convincing.

“Let this count as your first session then,” he said. “Now go down stairs and show Cameron you’re not wearing any panties.”

“What?”

“Don’t ‘what’ me.”

“I meant why, sir? Don’t you think it would be wise for there to be no more—”

“You’re not the only one getting punished tonight, Mia. Cole’s put me through hell the last few days and now it’s my turn to reciprocate.”

“Maybe you should just talk with him?”

“You know how Cameron loves to flaunt how proud he is of taming you.”

“Please don’t be angry with me.” I reached out. “Richard, my darling—”

“I’m angry. I have every right to be.”

“I’m your woman, not your property.”

“Would you like me to share with Cameron how he failed to train you?” Richard finished buttoning up his shirt. “How you fall short, Mia.”

“Please don’t.”

“Then obey.”

I went to leave.

“Where are you going?” he said.

“To fulfill your request, sir.”

“Wait there. There’s no point in it if I can’t see his face.”

CHAPTER 23

HAND IN HAND with Richard, we entered the kitchen.

Shay and Cameron stopped their conversation and turned to greet us. Cameron gaped at my dress and he went to speak, but seemed to think better of it.

“Beautiful,” said Shay.

I felt a blush rise. “Thank you.”

Cameron swapped a glance with Richard. “She looks lovely.” He spun round and reached for a stack of plates. “Mia, please open the wine.”

The aroma in here was amazing and my stomach grumbled in anticipation. I moved farther into the kitchen, slid the bottle of Alto Limay towards me, and set about uncorking it.

“I’ve got it,” said Richard, taking the wine from me.

Cameron resumed preparing dinner, moving about the kitchen with the confidence of a man who enjoyed entertaining and making it look effortless. Shay rejoined Stephen in the sitting room and from here I could see them hitting it off and sharing a joke. Richard ambled over toward the speaker hub that cradled his iPhone.

As Cameron made gravy on the stove, my thoughts drifted back to when he’d cooked me dinner in his Beverly Hills home. That seemed like a million light years away now, as though my life had been shaken up and where it had landed made no sense--a fracturing of reality.

“Taste.” Cameron held out the wooden spoon. “What do you think? More pepper?”

I sipped gravy from the spoon. “Perfect.”

Here was a man who could afford a chef yet he loved cooking. There was something so appealing about that. So sexy.

So homey.

I again ran through a scenario of how not to go through with Richard’s order. I came up with nothing.

It was time to get this out the way.

A few short steps and I stood right behind Cameron.

He turned and bumped into me. “Sorry.”

A delicate waft of cologne.

“I have to show you something,” I whispered, glancing over at Stephen and Shay, who were admiring one of the black and white prints of London.

“Mia?” said Cameron. “You wanted to show me something?”

Adele’s ‘Someone Like You’ burst out of the speakers, her luscious, sultry tones filling the room and providing a mischievous backdrop. Richard was holding the remote and staring over at us.

Cameron frowned over at him then his attention fell back on me.

Thankfully the kitchen counter prevented anyone else getting a peek as I lifted my dress above my waist.

Cameron blinked at me, his gaze sweeping from my eyes and down between my thighs.

I dropped my dress back down.

Grazing my bottom lip with my teeth, I tried to fight off this burn of embarrassment.

“Let me take a wild guess,” whispered Cameron. “Richard?”

Cameron’s shoes were shiny. I wondered if he’d polished them himself. They looked expensive.

But of course they are, you idiot.

Cameron whispered, “You okay, Mia?”

“Yes.”

He leaned into my ear. “You didn’t need to remind me what you look like, sweetheart. It’s easy to remember. The feel of your clit against my tongue, your taste, the way you tremble against my mouth when I make you come.” He lifted my chin to look into my eyes. “Do you remember what that feels like?”

I tranced out.

“How my cock feels when it’s buried deep inside you? Remember that? How your body shudders with each thrust?”

I grabbed the edge of the counter, my head yearning to rest against his chest but stopping short.

When my eyes found Cameron’s again, he was glaring at Richard.

“Put the wine glasses on the table please, Mia.” Cameron pointed to a cupboard. “They’re in there.”

He rounded the bar and headed over towards Richard.

Cameron took the remote from him and pushed a couple of buttons and Christmas music replaced Adele. Cameron whispered into Richard’s ear.

I collected the glasses from the cupboard and finished setting the table, placing a glass beside each place setting. I went on to place a Christmas cracker by each one too.

My blush didn’t make any sense. Cameron had seen me down there so many times before. I put it down to other people being in the room. Even if they hadn’t seen anything.

From across the room, Stephen’s focus was locked on me.

“Won’t be long now,” I told him. “It’s going to be delicious.”

He wandered over to me and faced the table. “So, seating plan?”

“Um, not sure. It’s all very informal.”

“Save yourself, Mia,” said Stephen softly. “Only then can you save them.”

“Excuse me?”

“Can I have a word please, Mia?” said Richard. “We’ll be right back,” he told Stephen.

I looked back at Stephen and he gave me a knowing a look.

Following Richard out of the sitting room, past the kitchen, and down the hallway, I hoped he’d keep the drama at bay.

He took my hands in his. “Apparently, I owe you an apology.”

“I wouldn’t say that.”

“I’ve been a bastard to you since I arrived and I want you to know this isn’t me. It’s not who I am. When Lance sent me those photos—”

“We don’t have to do this now.”

“No, we do. When I auctioned you off, it blew my mind Lance would betray us like that. It’s like he has a personal vendetta against me or Cameron or both of us.” Richard ran his fingers through his hair. “And you and I are both trying to piece our lives together. I’m still reeling from my past and so are you. But we can make it, babe. I know we can. We just have to trust each other. Be honest with each other.”

“I agree.”

“Let’s have a great evening. Let me spoil you. Let’s savor every second of being in London.”

“I love that idea.”

“So we’re all good?”

I reached up and caressed his face. “We are.”

He hesitated as though not quite convinced. “I’ll make it up to you.”

“Please, don’t flaunt me in front of Cameron like that.”

“It kind of backfired.” He shrugged. “Despite everything you say, I still have some reservations about how far I can push you.”

“Push me,” I said. “Take me as far as you believe I deserve to go.”

“God you’re breathtaking.” He pulled me into a hug. “If the others weren’t here, I’d be fucking you up against the wall right now.”

I took his hand and tugged it. “We have crackers.”

He threw his head back in a laugh.

Together, we returned to the sitting room.

We joined the others and were soon dining on roasted rosemary chicken with gravy, roast potatoes, carrots, cauliflower cheese, as well as Yorkshire pudding.

The meal was delicious and everyone stared in amazement as I scooped more  potatoes onto my plate. They were crunchy on the outside and soft and fluffy on the inside. The Yorkshire puddings tasted like a slice of heaven.

I’d never eaten anything like this. Cameron was a talented chef.

His and Stephen’s conversation went over my head a few times, but now and again I caught the gist of what they were saying. I savored sitting with these four interesting men, all of them different, yet their common denominator was how smart they all were.

Glasses clinked, knives and forks struck plates, and laughter roared from everyone as Stephen retold his coming out story.

“I was eighteen and shagging my boyfriend inside the closet,” he said. “We fell out right in front of my roommate.” Stephen laughed. “It was a coming out to remember.”

He really was adorable.

“It’s a good thing Mia’s open minded,” he said. “It’s also good we have our yin to balance out our yang.”

“I’ll say,” whispered Cameron.

“Did you know Monopoly was invented by a woman?” said Stephen. “Elizabeth Magie.”

“In 1904,” said Cameron with a nod. “And solar heating was also invented by a woman.”

“What about the fire escape?” said Richard. “That was invented by a woman too.”

“Makes sense,” said Shay. “She was probably thinking how she was going to escape the room if her husband walked in and caught her with her lover.”

We all laughed at that.

“Let’s make a toast to the divine feminine,” said Stephen, pushing his chair back to stand. He raised his glass. “The divine female is bold, she is righteous, and she is brave.”

“Here, here,” said Cameron, raising his glass and taking a sip. “To the sacred feminine.”

Blinking up in awe, blushing wildly, I felt Richard’s hand rest on mine.

“To Mia,” said Richard, raising his glass too.

Shay pushed himself to his feet and threw his drink back.

“Medical syringe,” said Cameron. “Letitia Geer.”

“This one will surprise you,” said Shay. “A woman also invented beer.” “Really?’I said.

“I think Mia would make a fine doctor,” said Shay. “What do you think Stephen?”

“Absolutely,” agreed Stephen.

“You have to be smart to be a doctor,” I said.

“You’re smart,” said Cameron.

I frowned at him.

“Leave her alone,” said Richard. “Mia wants to be a fashion designer.”

“Really?” said Stephen. “Why is that?”

“I like fashion,” I said.

Richard piped up. “Let’s not expose her to the horrors of science.”

An argument ensued, with Shay, Richard, and Cameron discussing the pros and cons of working in fashion compared to medicine. With their voices raised and the tone turning dark, I sank in my seat.

Stephen leaned over to me, offering one of those Christmas crackers. “Hold that end and pull.”

I clutched the ruffled paper edge of the cracker, trying to ignore Richard raising his voice at Cameron.

Stephen grabbed the other end and pulled.

CRACK!

“Fucking hell!” I yelled. “You made me buy bombs.”

Laughter roared from them, and after recovering from the mild explosion, the smell of gunpowder up my nostrils and my heart stuck in my throat, I collapsed into giggles.

Stephen was crying with laugher.

The conversation was now less frazzled.

Stephen regaled us with tales of his time at Harvard and even went on to tell us about his first impressions of meeting Cameron. He’d seen something special in his student even then.

I leaned forward, mesmerized.

Cameron told Stephen to change the subject.

But it was Richard who did, saying, “Will you please excuse us? It’s double-decker time.” He beamed at me.

“But I made apple crumble,” I said.

“We can have some later.”

“You can’t leave now,” said Shay.

Richard looked incredulous. “What do you mean I can’t?”

“Sorry,” said Shay. “What I meant was I’ve called off my security team. They’re probably half wasted by now. And I’ve been drinking too.”

“We’ll be fine,” said Richard.

“Go first thing tomorrow,” said Cameron. “Let’s just—”

“I really need some alone time with my girlfriend.”

Stephen sat back, his eyes bouncing from one person to the next.

“Shay, go make a call,” said Cameron. “See if any of your men are available.”

“It’s Christmas eve” said Shay.

“I’ll pay them double time,” said Cameron.

“Please don’t make this some huge inconvenience,” said Richard. “You’ve spent the last two days touring London with my girlfriend. How come when I get here I’m a prisoner in my own house?”

“Make the call,” said Cameron.

Shay pushed himself away from the table and headed off.

“What’s the fascination with riding on a double-decker, Mia?” asked Stephen.

“Oh, it’s something I’ve wanted to do ever since I learned about London,” I said. “Do you think we can go on an open roof one?”

“Sure,” said Richard. “At least Cameron left me one thing to do with you.”

Cameron rolled his eyes.

Shay reappeared. “I have one man. The rest are willing to cover but can’t drive.”

“That’s all we need,” said Richard. “For goodness sake, what do you really think Lance is going to do?” He looked over at Stephen. “Seriously?”

“These are unusual circumstances,” said Stephen. “Any idea on Lance’s motive?”

“He’s an arrogant bastard,” said Richard.

“There is something,” said Cameron thoughtfully. “But I’m not one hundred percent sure.”

“His daughter?” said Richard.

Cameron waved it off. “We’re moving into HIPAA territory.”

I leaned forward. “What does that mean?”

“Patient privacy,” said Stephen.

“You treated his daughter?” I said. “Arabella?”

“More wine anyone?” offered Cameron. “Richard, are you sure you don’t want to stay with us for some of Ms. Lauren’s famous apple crumble?”

“No thank you. Mia, grab your coat. We’re going out.”

It was too fricken cold to go out without underwear on.

After giving Cameron, Stephen, and Shay a big hug to thank them for dinner, I ran upstairs to change.

CHAPTER 24

LONDON APPEARED ETHEREAL.

Sitting beside Richard on the right side of the double-decker bus, I couldn’t pull back on this grin.

Cameron had purposefully saved this for when Richard could take me, and I knew he’d done it so as not to steal Richard’s thunder.

We’d waited an extra twenty minutes for an open top bus, cuddling outside Waterloo Station were the Rolls Ghost had dropped us off. We’d clambered on and found front row seats at the top.

The bus had taken off into the night and I was glad for the heat at our feet keeping us warm. Somewhere out there was one of Shay’s men watching over us. I felt a little guilty we were making him work.

Richard took his phone out and held it up. “Selfie time.”

We crushed our faces together and I beamed into the camera. Two more photos later and he’d captured the one he liked.

“Send it to me,” I said.

He pulled me into a hug, his fingers twisting and sweeping down my hair, soothing me. I wrapped my arms around his waist.

“I missed you,” he muttered.

“Missed you too,” I said, staring into his ocean blue eyes.

“You’re missing the view.”

“View’s perfect.”

Richard melted into a smile. “I’m going to be a better boyfriend. I promise.”

“And I’m going to be everything you need.”

“You already are.”

Richard pointed to this landmark and that, sharing what he knew about each one and I listened intently to him as he explained the lesser known facts of London. I learned that the Metropolitan Police, whose headquarters were based at Scotland Yard, started off with no power to investigate crimes. They merely had to arrest the public if caught in the act, which I found strange. Beneath the Guildhall lay the ruins of a Roman Amphitheatre. He went on to tell me that behind St. Pancras Station, right in the heart of London, was a two acre wild green area sitting on the banks of Regent’s Canal.

His words made London come alive.

This new life meant I’d have to push all thoughts of Master Cole out of my mind and find my way back to my old life. The place where all I’d thought about was being the girlfriend he deserved.

I rested my cheek against Richard’s chest and sunk into him.

Christmas lights, decorated store windows, and bustling tourists made for a wonderful view. Old buildings joined with modern, the architecture a mishmash of styles. When we reached more open areas, the city view spread out before us in a richly textured vision.

We drove past Marble Arch and Park Lane, onward to Piccadilly, Trafalgar Square, and I caught sight of The Tower of London again.

My gaze swept over those turrets and my thoughts guided me back onto the ice, remembering skating with Cameron over the moat, and his warning before we left what it meant to please him.

“You okay?” asked Richard.

I gripped his hand tighter. “I’m fine.”

We drove through the city of Westminster and I took in Soho.

Richard told me the name was first given to the place in the 17th century, despite it sounding modern.

“In fact the name comes from a former hunting cry,” said Richard. “Apparently the 1st Duke of Monmouth—”

A scream came from the street.

Shouting.

Richard leaped up, scrambled over to the other side, and peered over the rail “Shit.”

He bolted down the bus steps.

“What is it?” I called after him, flying out of my seat, trying to keep up.

Richard yelled at the driver to open the door. He flew out and onto the street.

When I caught up to Richard, he was kneeling over a man who was lying on his back the curb. The fifty-year-old was grey and still, and he wasn’t breathing. A middle aged woman carrying shopping bags was screaming beside him. His wife?

Everything spun out of control, moving in slow motion.

“Call 999,” yelled Richard, as he ripped open the man’s shirt. “Mia, run in there and ask for an AED.” He pointed to a hotel door. “Now!”

I burst in through the sliding doors of the Sanctum Soho Hotel and ran to the concierge. “I need an AED. And an ambulance. There’s a man out there and he’s—”

The young man disappeared behind a door.

“Wait,” I called out to him. “Please you have to help us.”

He reappeared holding a black bag. “Show me.”

Sprinting out through the automatic doors with the man on my tail, I pointed over at Richard, who leaned over that poor victim. Richard had ripped open the man’s shirt and was pressing up and down fast on his chest.

Richard grabbed the AED from the concierge and flicked it open, tugging two pads away from the device and sticking them onto the man’s bare chest.

“Everyone clear,” shouted Richard, and he held his finger on a button on the AED.

A rising wail came from the machine.

Richard reached for the man’s neck. “No pulse. I’ll shock again. Clear.”

In a daze, I stood there watching, marveling at the way Richard managed the situation and continued to resuscitate the stranger.

A siren edged closer.

Chaos.

A larger crowd gathered. Some people filmed the scene on their phones, while others looked on, seemingly as shocked as me. Police arrived, and an ambulance pulled up. Medics scrambled out and surrounded Richard, nudging him out of the way and taking over.

Richard rose and stepped back.

He turned and scanned the faces in the crowd and his face lit up when he saw me. I gave a nod of reassurance, wanting so badly to convey how proud of him I was.

Richard chatted with a policeman for a while. Afterward, he found me in the crowd and we nestled beneath the awning of the hotel.

“Where the hell’s our bus?” he said. “It’s was meant to be your special tour.”

“I think saving a life trumps a bus ride.”

“Still.”

“You could probably do with walking off your adrenaline.”

He led me away from the crowd. “I need a fucking drink.”

We walked hand in hand, dodging other pedestrians, occasionally stopping to window shop, and soaking in the sights.

“Do you love me again, Mia?” he said bashfully.

“I’ll always love you. Silly.”

“It worked! My elaborate plan to win your heart back. Of course getting a man to have a heart attack took some scheming on my part. But it was worth it.”

I slapped his arm. “Not funny, mister.”

“Not funny, sir, I think you meant.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Did you just roll your eyes at me?” he said. “Someone’s getting spanked later.”

“I look forward to it, sir,” I said, amused.

Richard opened the door to The French House Pub and a welcome warmth hit us as we made our way through the crowd. The barmen gestured he was just finishing up on another order.

“So 999 is the equivalent to 911?” I said.

“Yes.”

“You were amazing.”

“You were,” he said. “I needed that AED if I was going to have any chance of saving his life. You made that happen, Mia. We make a great team.”

“All credit goes to you.”

“Look where we ended up. It’s fate. My favorite pub.”

I was amazed he wasn’t more shaken up. He seemed so calm, so unfazed. He handed me a twenty pound note to pay for our drinks and headed off to the restroom to wash up.

There was a relaxed air, a homey atmosphere, with everyone chatting as old friends do. Locals, most of them, it seemed, some sipping their glasses of wine and others sipping beer.

Richard nudged me. “That was stupid leaving you alone.”

“I was fine.”

“Cameron would shoot me if he knew.”

“How did you find this place?”

“Discovered it way back.” He picked up our drinks and led us to a corner table.

We huddled close as Richard told me why he loved this place so much.

The deep red walls were covered in eclectic art and Richard told me they’d been painted by its visitors over the years. He went on to say that in the 1800s it had started off as a gin parlor and later evolved into a wine bar, before settling into its current incarnation as a pub. The locals freaked out when there was any rumor of making a change to the place. According to Richard, this was the best pub in London.

My mind snapped back to that man on the ground and the way Richard had jumped in without hesitation, the way he’d masterfully ordered those around him.

“Are you okay?” he said.

“Can’t stop thinking about it.”

“Luckily for me they changed the CPR technique so a rescuer doesn’t have to do mouth to mouth any more. Just chest compressions.”

“And it’s still as effective?”

“Apparently.”

I stared at his beautiful face, that sun kissed complexion, those deep ocean blue eyes. I was in awe.

“I have a feeling he’ll be fine,” he said. “He had a heartbeat when we left. He’ll be in the accident and emergency by now. That’s what they call an ER here.”

I took his hand. “You saved his life.”

“Yeah, well, there’s my dirty little secret out.”

“How do you mean?”

He stared at his glass and reached in to pick out a speck of cork. “I started out as a medical student. I dropped out in my first year. Switched to business and majored in history.”

“You would have made a great doctor.”

“One word. Cadavers.” He cringed. “When it came to my time in the lab…could not fucking do it.”

“I don’t think I could either.”

“I couldn’t stop thinking of the person’s life. Their family. Couldn’t detach. It was around the time I’d met Cameron and he even went out of his way to talk me through one. He was well ahead of me and working his surgical rotation at the time.” Richard raised a hand. “Fuck no. Switched right over to business.”

“What would you have specialized in?”

“I thought I wanted to be a surgeon. Boy, was I wrong.”

This trip really was opening my eyes to my two favorite men in the world and I was discovering so much about them.

My sweet, loveable Richard.

“You never told me this before?” I said. “Why?”

“It doesn’t exactly help that Cameron’s always the shining example of heroism. Anyway, I put it down to one of life’s experiences.” He shrugged. “I’m sure you have secrets too, Mia?”

“Not any more. My biggest secret was my belief I’d injected myself with cocaine. Cameron was able to put the pieces of the truth together for me.”

I cringed inwardly that I’d brought up his name.

“If I ever came across that drug dealer,” said Richard. “I’ll kill him.”

“Then you’d go to prison and I’d lose you.”

“You’d visit me thought, right?” He winked.

“I’d be too busy running Enthrall,” I said. “Rearranging your obsessive pen collection.”

He feigned horror. “Leave my pen collection alone. It’s taken years to get those pens perfect in that holder. Years, I tell you.”

“Mr. OCD.”

“I love order. Everything controlled. Managed. Orchestrated perfectly.”

“Especially your sub?”

“Without a doubt, yes. I’m a demanding master.”

A breath caught in my throat as he reached up and ran his fingertips along my collar. “I’m so happy that things are back to normal again.”

“Me too.”

“Are you really?”

“Yes, sir.” I glanced around at the other people, hoping they’d not caught any of this.

“I’ve rearranged a few things at home for us,” he said. “Made one of the spare bedrooms into a playroom.”

“Thank you, sir. I can’t wait to see it.”

“I can’t wait to leave you in there all night.” He arched a brow. “Should you deserve it.”

You can do this, my muse whispered. You can fulfill him.

Think of the pleasure.

My eyelids fluttered with the thought.

His hand reached beneath the table and glided up and down my inner thigh. “I love seeing you descend into subspace.”

A young couple sat down beside us and Richard withdrew his hand and threw me a grin.

I wondered what Cameron, Shay, and Stephen were doing right now. Probably digging into that apple crumble. Impressing each other with their Ivy League late night banter.

This shadowy doubt was lifting.

“This pub was once the secret meeting place of the French resistance during World War II,” said Richard.

I scanned the room, imagining French spies huddled like us, plotting to save their country. I’d dipped into Richard’s vast collection of history books, many of them about Great Britain, and found myself losing hours.

“Famous writers once hung out here.” Richard smiled. “You’re sitting in the exact spot where the famous Welsh poet Thomas Dylan used to sit and write. ‘Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night?’”

I shook my head to let him know I’d never heard of him. Again I’d been reminded of Richard’s privileged education.

“Rage, rage against the dying of the light,” said Richard, quoting Dylan.

Another shake of my head that it wasn’t familiar.

“Read that with a Welsh accent and it’s quite something.” He pointed at the bar. “Dylan would write a masterpiece then get so drunk he’d leave it behind when he staggered home. Luckily the landlord knew him well and would rescue Dylan’s scribbles, keeping them safe until Thomas came back the next day.”

Taking a sip of wine, I admired Richard’s knowledge. The way he always shared it with me without emphasizing how little I knew.

“There used to be a time when you could smoke in pubs,” he said. “The smokiness added to the atmosphere.”

I imagined those spies surrounded by wafts of smoke, whispering amongst each other, all of them holding onto the hope they’d one day live in peace.

Thoughts of Lance caused me to shiver and I looked around at the many faces, wondering if even now we were being followed.

“You’re too young to remember that time,” said Richard, bringing me back from my musing.

“The war?”

He laughed. “No, silly, smoking in pubs.”

I laughed too.

“Sometimes I forget just how young you are. We ask a lot of you.”

“Scarlet calls me an old soul.”

“You exude peacefulness.” He squeezed my hand. “People probably look at you and see privilege. Especially as Cameron has dressed you up like this. They won’t see the battles you’ve fought.”

“We all go through something, right?”

He looked thoughtful. “Although there’s jealousy you got to spend time with my best friend, I’m also happy you got to see Cam as I do.”

“I see why all of you are so fond of him,” I said. “You two are so similar. You’re both generous and funny—”

“I’m funnier though, right?”

“You are.”

“And better looking?”

“Most definitely.” I humored him.

“Unless of course you’re going for a tall, dashing, chiseled, billionaire type and then I’m screwed.”

“Richard.” I slapped his arm.

“That’s the second time you’ve slapped me tonight.” He chuckled. “I’m the dom, remember.”

“Yes, sir,” I said respectfully. “Actually, it was interesting to discover even Cameron has a chink in his armor.”

“How do you mean?”

“He opened up to me a little.”

“In what way?”

“Afghanistan.”

Richard’s eyes widened. “That was a big step, Mia. That’s no go territory for the rest of us.”

“It’s sad he still frets over all that.”

“Henry will always be a hot button for him.”

Henry?

The realization hit me like a hurricane.

CHAPTER 25

NOW IT ALL made sense.

All the pieces of the puzzle fit into one nightmarish conclusion. My face flushed and I lifted my glass and sipped to hide my reaction.

The officer Cameron had aggressively debriefed, the man he’d extracted intelligence from in the Middle East, the man he’d broken down, was Henry, his older brother.

My sweet, beautiful Cameron. He couldn’t even bring himself to tell me the whole story.

“Cameron refuses to forgive himself,” said Richard. “It’s best if you stay away from that subject.”

“Yes, of course.”

Cameron had only spoken of Henry once, telling me he still lived in a cabin. Once destined to take over as CEO of the empire that was Cole Tea, only now, Henry was too unstable to even come out of the woods.

“I hope Cameron finds a way to forgive himself,” I said.

“I doubt he ever will,” said Richard. “It’s a hard burden to carry.”

“He saved all those lives. Can’t he find comfort in that?”

“Actions have consequences, Mia.”

My eyebrows shot up.

“Yes, I suppose I deserved that,” he said. “I’m suffering the mother of all consequences having handed you over to the hottest stud in America so he can fuck your brains out and all on my behalf.”

“He trained me well.”

The couple on our left were staring.

Why yes, by all means eavesdrop on our private conversation.

Richard followed my gaze.

His focus snapped back to me. “Let’s go.”

That sounded wonderful and I grabbed my handbag and followed him out.

The night air hit us.

Richard looked down the street and signaled to the Rolls Ghost. “Nothing like standing out like two assholes. Thanks, Cameron.”

“It’s a lovely car.”

“Maybe we should christen it?”

I opened my handbag and poked inside, pretending to be looking for my phone.

“No, you didn’t?” he said.

“Um, well…”

“Have you ever considered the art of lying?”

“That feels wrong,” I said. “I mean, lying to you.”

He opened the back door and shuffled me in.

Richard climbed in beside me. “Home, please,” he told the driver.

The car pulled away from the curb.

Richard turned to face me. “I’m going to buy a map. And you’re going to stick pins in all the places that you and Cameron didn’t fuck in. I’ll probably only need one pin.”

“Please don’t.” I self-consciously glanced at the chauffer.

“If you ever fuck him again I better be watching,” he snapped.

I tugged on his coat. “Shush.”

“Would you like some music, sir?” asked the driver.

“Yes, please,” said Richard, as he looked up from his phone.

“Classical?” asked the driver.

“Sure.”

Rippling notes tumbled out from the surround sound speakers.

“Der Ring des Nibelungen?” said Richard.

“Very good, sir,” he said. “Wagner.”

“How’s Trevor?” I asked the driver, raising my voice over the music.

I assumed Cameron had given Trevor the night off.

“Who, ma’am?” he said.

“Cameron’s other chauffeur,” I said. “Will you wish him a Merry Christmas from us.”

Maybe mentioning the other driver was considered rude in England?

“Mr. Booth,” he said. “I have a message for you from Dr. Cole.”

“Oh.” Richard glanced at his phone.

We stopped at a red light and I watched a group of teenagers run along the crosswalk. Cameron had told me they call them zebra crossings here.

The driver held Richard’s gaze in the rearview. “Weaving spiders, come not here. Hence, you long-legged spinners, hence.”

Richard’s expression changed to wonder and he replied, “Spiders with your webs, stay away. You long-legged things, begone.”

“Shall I change direction, sir?” asked the driver.

“Oberon Grove?” muttered Richard, and he gestured for me to remain silent.

“If it would please you, sir?”

“Any chance I can go home and change first?”

“He saved a man’s life today,” I told him.

Richard frowned. “He doesn’t need to hear that.”

“A tux will be provided,” said the driver.

“Then let’s go straight there.”

“Yes, sir.” The driver gave a nod. “Dr. Cole says Merry Christmas, sir. This is his holiday gift to you.”

“And Ms. Lauren?” asked Richard.

“She may accompany you, sir.”

“She’s well primed. Dr. Cole trained her himself.”

“Then she will be well received, I’m sure.”

Richard collapsed back in his seat and stared at me, mouthing, “Oh my God.”

“What is it?” I whispered back.

Notes rose and fell dramatically. Pedestrians, other cars, flashes of buildings all became a blur.

“Cell phones off, please, sir.”

Richard looked up. “Just texting a thank you to Dr. Cole.”

“I’m afraid all contact with the outside world is restricted from here on in.” He raised his hand and gestured. “If I may, sir?”

He turned off his phone. Richard motioned for me to hand mine over to him. He frowned when he caught the Hello Kitty iPhone cover, but didn’t mention it, merely gave them both to the driver.

I didn’t like it one bit but Richard seemed fine with it. Whatever was going on was making him happy, or so it seemed, and despite wanting to go home I couldn’t spoil his fun.

“May I ask your name?” said Richard.

“Chauffer,” he said.

Richard looked amused.

The music became louder.

“What is this?” I mouthed back.

Richard gave a shake of his head that we couldn’t talk. Not yet, anyway.

“How long before we arrive?” asked Richard.

“Within the hour, sir.”

“Good,” said Richard. “That gives me plenty of time to prepare my submissive.”

CHAPTER 26

OTHER THAN WAGNER there’d been no sound.

No whispers, no further conversation with our driver, just me staring out the window and wondering what lay ahead.

Richard’s told you to trust him, my muse comforted. So trust him.

Trust this incredible adventure.

In way of preparation, Richard assisted me with the removal of my bra and panties, whispering close to my ear he’d explain more soon. He tucked them into his coat pocket.

With my hand in his, both of us rested back and enjoyed the spectacular view of city life falling away and becoming countryside. Here and there amongst the trees I glimpsed large homes in the distance. We drove off the main motorway and onto a small road and farther still, down a long pathway that led to a sprawling vista of land spreading out before us.

Richard and I swapped a wary glance when we saw the enormous country estate rising up majestically on the horizon.

It seemed to take forever to reach it.

My heart took off at a rapid rate when I caught sight of that flag flying on the far left turret with its emblem of a lion.

Beyond ornate iron gates stood a stately manor. Its four central pillars gave an intimidating Romanesque air. Its front door was vast, and beyond that loomed the promise of decadence and unending luxury.

We drove through towering gates that swung wide and pulled up outside.

The most stunning accent was that dramatic fountain out front. Three horses were frozen mid-leap with their front hooves in the air. The spouting blue tinged water arched high then fell into a round marble basin.

Richard and I exited the Rolls.

A sound of rushing water came from the fountain.

Other than that, the air was still and quiet. The only other sound was that of our shoes crunching on the gravel driveway.

“Oberon Grove,” whispered Richard, “is the club for Britain’s ruling class. Reserved only for members of high society, for the wealthy with high profiles. The kind of men and women who set world policies. Royalty.”

“Cameron arranged this?” I asked.

“He’s been a member for years.” Richard glanced back at our driver and threw him a wave.

“What about our phones?” I said.

“He’s taking us home. So we’ll get them back later.” Richard stopped and crooked his head to take in the grand architecture. “Cam’s been trying to pull strings on a membership for me. There’s a ten to fifteen year waiting list, a twenty thousand dollar membership fee, and members are strictly screened. I can’t believe we’re here.”

I grabbed his hand. “What was that thing about spiders?”

“William Shakespeare’s Midsummer Night’s Dream,” he said. “The words mean that trouble makers can stay away.”

“Was that a code you gave to him?”

“Yes, it means I’m compliant.”

“Compliant?”

“Yes, an established member of the community.”

“Oh.” It came out as a tremble.

“I don’t think you realize what an honor this is. Heads of state are members.”

“What kind of things will we be doing?”

“I imagine taking part in the Yuletide ritual, which belonged to the pagans before Christianity hijacked it. We’ll get to witness an erotic ceremony.” His hand swept wide. “These are the ultimate hedonists. You’ll see the kind of debauchee you only read about.”

“More than Chrysalis?”

“We never do anything illegal at Chrysalis.”

My gaze shot to the house.

Richard frowned at me. “If you’re here it’s because Cameron deems you ready.”

But for what exactly?

I raised my chin high. “I am, sir.”

Richard gave a nod of approval.

The front door opened and a young, dashing butler gestured for us to enter.

We made our way inside.

And were both promptly patted down. The butler asked to see inside my handbag. When he seemed satisfied, we were allowed to continue on in.

The foyer was just as breathtaking.

Black and gold furnishings, sweeping drapes, a low hung crystal chandelier throwing off a yellow light over all this opulence, but even more striking—

On those sweeping stairs appeared a dream-like vision. A tall, stunning brunette stood elegantly on the last step, dressed merely in a tiny thong. Crowning those lush brunette locks was a dramatic headdress; black feathers rose high. Those pert breasts, that perfect figure, made her look like a supermodel, and if that wasn’t stunning enough, on her right hand she wore a black glove upon which sat an enormous black owl. Its eyes shone a shocking blue.

It blinked at us.

“Welcome to Oberon Grove,” she said, her accent crisply British.

Richard bowed his head.

She gracefully strode down that last step with the prestige of an Amazonian goddess. Richard had once told me about the need for showmanship back in Enthrall, but this was altogether different. She was ethereal. Flawless.

She arched a brow as her gaze fell on me.

“Down,” whispered Richard.

I sunk to my knees before her and bowed my head, the vantage point perfect for checking out those diamond studded strappy heels and her red painted toenails.

“I trust your journey was comfortable?” she said.

“Very, thank you,” said Richard, and he reached out to take her left hand to kiss it.

This seemed to please her.

“Mr. Booth, you’ll change and then you’ll be permitted to play.” Her focus shot to me. “You may rise.”

I pushed myself to my feet as elegantly as possible.

“You will address me as Mistress Summer,” she said. “Gatekeeper of the Dragon’s Lair. Mistress of doms. Dame of the submissives. My word is sacrosanct. My word is final.”

“An honor,” said Richard.

She raised her right hand and the butler, now wearing a similar black glove, leaped forwards and took the bird from her.

“He’s beautiful,” I said. “What’s his name?”

“Puck,” she said.

Richard signaled I shouldn’t be talking.

She caught it. “There’s plenty of time for silence, Mr. Booth.”

“Please, call me Richard.”

“Richard.” She made it sound so alluring. “We have your tuxedo.” She motioned to the butler. “Mr. Wherry will show you to your accommodation. A suite you may return to anytime should you wish. Ms. Lauren, you’ll accompany me.”

I shot Richard a nervous glance.

“She’ll be well taken care of, Mr. Booth,” she said.

“Please see she is.” He stepped towards her, his height equaling hers. “She’s my sub. No man touches her, understand?”

She raised her chin proudly. “If Ms. Lauren is to stay she will need to be prepared. Introduced to the other subs. Expected to perform as a superior submissive. If she breaks so much as one order she will be expelled. Forever.”

Richard neared me. “Obey Mistress Summer.”

I gave an uneasy nod.

Richard took my hands in his. “I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“Where am I going?” I muttered.

“To change, Ms. Lauren,” said Mistress Summer. “There is a dress code. You are breaking it.”

My heart fluttered with anticipation.

Before arriving, I’d wanted to go back to Chelsea Crescent. See Cameron again. But now I chose to be bold and face this new adventure he’d arranged for us, and show Richard what I was capable of.

After all, Cameron knew my limits.

“Thank you, Mistress Summer,” I said.

Richard gave a wave of support and headed off down the hallway. I followed Mistress Summer in the opposite direction.

She told me I was to walk a few feet behind her and I did.

The curve of her spine, that thin thong, her rounded buttocks, those long, long legs strolled before me. Her noble stride complemented her commanding presence.

As though Summer had been cloned, three similar leggy women strolled our way in that same majestic stride. They too were naked other than wearing masquerade masks. They bowed their heads as they past. These women were six foot at least and their high heels nudged them taller.

I forced myself not to stare, not to make eye contact, but with my belly full of butterflies and this need to find some common ground with these goddesses, it was a challenge.

Inside the candle lit room, I admired the dark wood and lavish furniture. Deep green drapes covered the windows, paintings of barely clad women hung on the walls, and the scent of sandalwood hung thick in the air.

Summer pointed. “Shower and return to me. Do not get your hair wet.”

The bathroom was all black marble and glass.

I found a shower cap, put it on, and headed into the glass paneled shower. I wondered what Richard was doing right now. Was he getting similar treatment? Knowing Richard, if Mr. Wherry tried to help him he’d tell him to fuck off.

I rallied myself. Make him proud.

Within ten minutes, I’d followed Summer’s command and now found myself back in the sandalwood room, wrapped in a plush white towel, filled with anticipation.

Mistress Summer tapped the high padded bench. “Up.”

I hurried over and scooted onto it. My legs dangled over.

“Pain is our prerogative.” Her thumb brushed over my mouth to free my bottom lip from my teeth.

I’d been biting it.

“We expect great things from a submissive trained by Dr. Cole.”

“Thank you, Mistress.” I ran through the mantra: always assume the pose during play, and obey.

Every. Single. Command.

A flood of adrenaline made me focus on the door. I wanted to go find Richard. Experience all this with him.

“Towel.” She held out her hand.

I shimmied on the bench until the towel was no longer wrapped around me and I was now completely naked. She took it from me and threw it down.

“Open your legs wide, please,” she said.

I hesitated, breaking the cardinal rule, and earned myself a frown.

She blinked at me. “We must decorate you for your master, Mia.” She picked up a deep red lipstick and dabbed the tip with a small makeup brush.

“Orders are given once and only once,” she said firmly.

“If she breaks so much as one she’ll be expelled.”

My thighs parted on their own accord, as though she held some hypnotic power over me.

“Show me,” she said sternly.

Gently, I eased apart my labia.

She brought the brush low and painted my clitoris red with the lipstick, sending shudders of pleasure. My thighs trembled and my heart raced. My fingernails dug into my delicate skin as I held it apart for her.

“Good girl,” she said. “Nice and still for your mistress.”

Oh my god. She was dragging out painting my clit, taking her time stroking that brush over and around it, flicking, patting, dabbing, as though taking pleasure from arousing me. Her brush caused me to swell, and as I peered down I saw that delicate nub stand erect, responding to each of her brushstrokes. My sex spasmed, clenched and relaxed, clenched and relaxed, and her focus down there seemingly gauged my response.

This didn’t make any sense.

Cameron had warned Richard not to share me, yet here was this goddess clearly performing an intimate act. Don’t share me? Had I misinterpreted what those words really meant?

But this was a woman touching me and I took comfort in that at least.

She reached for a small tube of glitter and sprinkled it upon my clit; it shimmered beneath the lights.

She used her fingertip to rub it over completely. “Edible glitter.”

I held back on a frown.

“Down you get,” she ordered.

My shaky legs found the ground, my thighs still trembling from this heightened arousal, but I quickly regained my balance and brought my hands behind my back, assuming the pose.

Back straight and breasts pushed out. Stare forward. No eye contact. Head high, proud. Willing to serve. To please.

To pleasure.

My lips parted and I moistened them with my tongue. My breathing stuttered and my cheeks flushed. It was easy to admire her, from the way she moved so elegantly, to those gentle but firm touches emphasizing her control.

“What an exquisite submissive you are, Ms. Lauren.”

Summer continued her ritual, dressing me in a skimpy corset that exposed both my breasts and, not surprisingly, my nether region, considering the time she’d taken to decorate it. She brushed out my hair and secured a feathered headdress, clipping it to my head with precision. Those crystal nipple rings pinched as she slid them on. They sent a ripple of pleasure around my areola and into my breasts, and lower.

She took her time playing with my nipples to adjust those decorations just so—

Shooting jolts of ecstasy into my sex.

A soft whimper escaped me.

She ignored it, as though this was all business as usual, and knelt before me to ease my feet into strappy high heels.

Mistress Summer applied my makeup last, using Estee Lauder foundation, fixing false eyelashes with ease, and lining them with heavy eyeliner. She chose that scarlet red for my lips—

“It’s imperative you match.” She slapped my pussy hard.

Sending another jolt of pleasure.

I stood still, letting her tap out a steady beat between my thighs. “Very good,” she said, continuing to punish me, her hand coming down hard on my clit with firm, steady spanks. Arousal stole my breath away.

My footing lost for a second, I quickly righted my back and tried not to lean.

Slap. Slap. Slap.

I remembered my hands needed to be behind my back.

And shuddered.

Trembled.

She paused and parted my labia with her delicate fingertips, holding it apart for at least a minute.

I stared dead ahead, trying to control my breathing.

Was I meant to say something? Do something?

“Good,” she said, seemingly pleased by my obedience.

Slap. Slap. Slap.

She was bringing me closer, sending me into a luscious trance of pleasure.

This was it.

I was experiencing what I’d only glimpsed at Chrysalis. I was playing in the same domain as aristocrats. My first bisexual experience, and I was liking it.

My reservations lifted as I kept reminding myself Cameron wanted me to experience this. He knew I was ready. Uncertainly was pushed aside by pride.

This gorgeous goddess was focused on me and I sensed she was as high end as it got. This was a privilege reserved for the very few.

For the sensually elite.

Cameron had once hinted at my bi-curious nature, and I wondered what he’d say if he saw me now, standing tall and proud and surrendering in his name to this stunning brunette, this queen of dominatrixes.

The only sound was that of her slaps striking my pussy.

“Arms behind your back, please,” she demanded.

They’d slipped to my side again as my mind tranced out, my clit throbbing woefully in-between those delayed slaps.

Her hand was shiny with glitter.

“Stand to attention, Mia.”

Slap.

“Yes, Mistress. Sorry, Mistress.”

Slap. “Much better.”

My jaw gaped, and my eyes fluttered as they fell upon her. I imagined all those submissives swooning at her feet, willing to do just about anything for her.

Slap. Slap. Slap.

I swallowed hard, suspecting she’d noticed if I trembled through a climax.

A sigh of relief mixed with longing when she withdrew her hand and ceased her teasing. She played with my hair, readjusted those nipple rings, and tugged on my half corset.

She stepped away to admire me and then strolled across the room, pulling back a drape.

I studied my reflection in the full length mirror that had been hidden behind it.

I looked like her, or even one of those exquisite women we’d past in the hallway. All glamorous vixen and more stunning then I’d ever dressed before.

My nipples stood erect from her play, and a sparkly glistened over the red lipstick painted on my clit. It glinted like a rare jewel and I understood its meaning.

“Look how perfect you are now, Mia,” she cooed, as she clipped a long chain to the back of my diamond collar.

“I’ll fit in,” was all I could say.

“On the contrary. You’ll stand out.”

All I needed was a mask and I too would blend in with the others.

I didn’t want to stand out.

“Follow.” She gave the chain a tug.

A yank at my neck. “My mask, Mistress?”

“No mask.” She turned to look at me. “How else will they see your expression?”

“My expression?’

Summer frowned as though I should know this. “Yes, Mia, when you come.”

CHAPTER 27

ALONG THE HALLWAY I paused before a painting.

I recognized the artist’s work. “Rembrandt?”

Mistress Summer looked impressed. “You know your art, Mia”

Actually, I was buying myself time to comprehend her last statement before we’d left that room. Was she implying I was going to be involved in some kind of public erotic display?

“Mia?”

“I saw a similar painting by the same artist in Buckingham Palace, Mistress.”

“When did you visit there?”

“Cameron took me.” I quickly corrected myself. “Master Cole.”

“Did you stay there?”

“No, just visited.” I looked back at the painting. “We had a private tour. Master Cole told me Rembrandt didn’t come from a family of artists. His father was a miller and his mother a baker.” My nervousness showed as I rambled on.

Her hand settled on my lower spine. “This is an original. Another reason our security is so tight. There’s more art here than at the Tate.”

“I like the Tate.”

“Dr. Cole took you there too?”

“Yes.”

She played with a strand of my hair. “You’re Mr. Booth’s submissive yet you were trained by Dr. Cole?”

“Yes.”

“Your master is a generous man.”

“He is, Mistress. My time with Dr. Cole has been quite wonderful.”

“Ah, he stole a piece of your heart, Mia.”

My fingertips traced over my collar.

“The lord of this manor is a lover of art too,” she said. “He’s a collector of curiosities. Would you like to see a few?”

“Yes, please. What does he collect?”

“Other than priceless paintings, rare jewels, tapestries, antiques.” She ran her thumb over the chain. “One of a kind delicacies.”

We continued down faintly lit hallways with Mistress Summer walking ahead. Now and again we’d catch a glimpse of pretty submissives making out with each other, tucked away inside alcoves, or others flaunting their fucking right there in the hallway for all to see. Two, three, and sometimes more, all writhing in ecstasy.

Breasts suckled, fingers pumping, hips rocking, eyelids heavy with need.

Mistress Summer barely threw them a passing glance, as though there was nothing unusual about pretty nymphs in sensual trysts. Soft moans echoed along with the sounds of sex, the sound of passions rising.

The deep throated moans of coming.

A tug on my collar was a reminder from Summer I was to follow and not watch. I wanted to talk to them, ask them how they’d come to be here. Find a friend perhaps to share this intimidating adventure.

The hallways twisted and turned and stretched on forever. Ripples of laughter carried from behind closed doors. The all too familiar snap of a whip. The striking of a cane. Screams of pain; the victims wails for that torture not to cease.

What was this place Richard had brought me to? And Cameron had deemed me ready for.

And where were all the men?

I’d lost my bearings. It would take a small miracle to find my way back to the foyer.

“When will I be reunited with Master Richard?” I asked.

“At his pleasure, Mia,” she said.

We’d descended into the lowest chambers.

And passed through several air locks--an elaborate system to preserve whatever was behind that large steep door. It swung on huge hinges.

And closed behind us with a hiss sealing us in.

Glass cases were set here and there throughout the vast room. It looked like a museum. The air was chilled. A glare came off those pristine white walls.

My nipples felt the cold and hardened in response.

Summer guided me around, pointing to each display, sharing her knowledge on what she knew about each piece. That scroll laid out in one with its corners weighted down had come from Egypt.

“This scroll was discovered in 1946,” said Summer. “Found inside a case a mile inland from the Dead Sea. Its Aramaic text is apparently quite significant.”

“What does it say?” I asked.

She looked upon it with awe. “Our Tsar won’t tell me. He’s stubborn like that.”

“Tsar?”

“Lord of the house.”

Up there, high on the wall, a camera shifted its lens.

“I think he’s watching us,” I whispered.

Summer fluttered her long black lashes. “Of course he is, Mia.”

“He won’t mind us being in here?”

“You’re here at his discretion,” she said, holding out the chain for me to take. “He trusts you not to share his secret.”

She was literally giving me full rein to wander around, and I clutched my chain to my chest.

“Should the world discover all this—” Her hand swept wide– “There would be an outcry from the art community.”

“Are these illegal?” I said softly.

“They’re acquired legally, but some would argue they belong to the people. The public would never truly appreciate all these pieces. They wouldn’t understand them as our Tsar does. Or treasure them.”

Inside another glass cabinet stood a perfectly preserved life-size sculpture. The man wore a toga over his armor and in his left hand he held a scroll.

“Caesar,” said Summer.

And over there was the skeletal remains of a two headed baby.

Fuck me.

I hurried past that and peered into the case containing a hand written letter. It was signed by Truman Capote. Moving on, I admired the collection of antique cameras, and beyond that, a stack of old keys in all shapes and styles.

The goblet in the corner took my breath away.

I pretended I hadn’t seen that one in case there lay some risk about what I was viewing. I couldn’t wait to see Richard and tell him about all this. Maybe Summer would bring him down here too.

“You have been summoned, Mia,” she said.

My gaze swept up to the camera.

“He has a gift for you.”

“Me? Why?”

“He finds you pleasing. Rare.”

“Rare?”

She ran her fingers over my face. “It’s not just your cheekbones, or the spacing of your eyes. It’s here.” She rested her hand over my heart. “You shine.”

Her hand felt warm against my bare skin, pressing firmly between my breasts.

“I don’t want to be part of his collection,” I muttered nervously.

She threw her head back in a laugh. “We won’t tell him that.”

These glass cabinets were starting to freak me out. Something told me the Tsar had unusual tastes, and hearing the buzz of the camera following us around was unsettling.

“Follow.” Summer turned sharply on her feet and punched a series of numbers into a keypad.

I managed to catch the first five, but the rest were lost to me.

She held out her hand for me to return the chain to her command. I laid it in her palm and bowed my head. She gave a nod of approval.

There came relief when I realized we were heading back up to the main floor. Sprawling hallways stretched before us.

I wondered what my gift was.

Mistress Summer knocked five times on a door.

“Welcome to the nest,” she said softly.

A wave of uncertainty swept over me.

“You’re now one of us,” she said. “You’re an owlet.”

She guided me inside.

Burgundy drapes swept over tall windows, plush carpeting covered the floor, and naked women inside all wore owl half masks. There were about fifty of them and they either stood, or sat, some alone, others cuddling, all of their gazes turned toward a four poster bed with the white drapes sweeping either side.

A young woman with a pixie haircut lay in the center of it, resting on a spray of pillows. She’d brought her legs up and spread her thighs wide and was showing off her sex to everyone. Under these warm yellow lights, her glitter sprinkled clit shimmered.

Just like mine.

Close to her, at the foot of the bed, sat three women. A redhead and a blonde sat to the right, and like Pixie they were naked and unmasked, allowing me to see just how pretty they were, as though they’d been plucked off a catwalk just like Summer.

She tugged me closer to the foot of the bed.

I’d mastered Summer’s elegant stride and felt like I was mingling in a little more now. Other than not wearing a masquerade mask like everyone else.

A tall brunette sat on the left side of the bed and she was dressed similar to Summer, that regal spray of feathers rising out of long lush brunette locks and her half owl mask decorated in gold. The chain she held dangled from the collars of the redhead and blonde. They gazed at their mistress in reverence.

She was whispering to them.

Her French accent was barely audible. Her words flowed soft and alluring, and from their expressions they were entranced by her.

It was difficult to hear, even being this close.

Slowly, their mistress’s gaze found me with a turn of her masked face. That blink of brown eyes.

A nod of approval from Mistress Summer.

The owl masked Mistress returned her attention to her subs.

Her nod signaled her permission.

The redhead leaned in-between Pixie’s thighs and slowly ran her tongue up and along her sex. Redhead then paused and glanced back at her mistress, as though gauging her response, her approval. When she received it, she gave a soft sigh of gratitude and returned her mouth to Pixie’s sex, her tongue languishing there, flicking, setting a pace over Pixie’s swollen clit.

Pixie arched her back and was scolded by their mistress.

I knew this game all too well; she’d be expected to endure this pleasure obediently and without responding to that natural urge to rock her hips, which would only intensify the burning desire being administered furiously by her fellow sub.

A nod was given by their masked mistress and the redhead made way for the blonde to dive in and lavish her affection upon Pixie.

The sound of her lapping mixed with soft sighs of Pixie nearing. An increasing wetness; painted pink toes curling. Those hands on either side of her body clenched the bed sheets until her knuckles went white. Her face contorted in anguished bliss.

These gentle touches of affection were shared by their demanding mistress, who at times nudged redhead farther into Pixie’s sex when it was her turn, or reached up to tweak Pixie’s nipples, working out those elongated buds, one and then the other, pinching and twisting artfully.

Pixie endured all this like the well trained owlet she must have been. Any lesser woman would have been writhing by now. Her limbs trembled, and her wide eyed expression full of awe now rested on her masked mistress—

Whose hand had lowered between Pixie’s thighs to hold apart her labia to allow those furtive tongues the fuller access they eagerly sought. Redhead hungrily suckled Pixie’s clit and allowed it to slip through her lips before her mouth captured it again.

Again.

And again.

Mistress Summer spoke up, warning Pixie she must wait for permission.

I knew this game too.

And my own arousal was given away by this wetness that was impossible to deny.

I glanced at the eyes behind the masks of those watching. All of them were like me, entranced by this feminine fantasy playing out.

The redhead and her blonde friend shared an occasional glance. They too seemed mesmerized, stealing quick kisses with each other before one of them went back in, burying their face to take Pixie higher.

We, the witnesses, merely shared this beautiful display of feminine affection. Surprisingly there came a sense of peace, a knowing that this pursuit of female pleasure was a rare glimpse into this mystical ceremony.

Redhead was chosen by the masked Mistress to take Pixie over the edge, and her frenzied tongue moved in once more to flicker over twinkling glitter, her head bobbing, her own whimpers escaping.

Even as merely a witness, I too was caught up, captured, my own sex thrumming with need.

Masked Mistress maneuvered her hand beneath Redhead’s chin then brought it toward Pixie’s sex and slipped two fingers inside her, so she could leisurely fuck her, complementing redhead’s tongue that strummed brilliantly above.

Moans rose, thighs trembled. Pixie’s jaw went slack and she pouted. Between those soaking wet thighs, her sex spasmed around pumping fingers for everyone to see…

Everyone to share.

Mercy was granted to Pixie so she could find her way.

Over her scream of pleasure came the order from her masked Mistress, “Venir Disque Dur.”

Pixie did as she was told and came hard.

CHAPTER 28

MISTRESS MASK’S EYES found me again.

Only then did I remember where I’d met that French Mistress before.

A rush of lightheadedness.

If Helete was here, so would Lance be.

Half aware of Pixie being guided off the bed and led away, I glanced back at the door we’d come in through. As though sensing I might bolt, the chain coming from my collar became taut as Summer pulled me towards her.

Pixie was looking back at her redhead and blonde friends, and they smiled at her until she was hurried away. Both their lips were shiny with glitter.

“I need to find Richard,” I whispered.

Summer gestured to the bed. “But what about your gift?”

“I won’t be able to enjoy it until I’ve asked my master’s permission,” I said. “He’s very strict.”

Helete patted the bed from me to climb on.

I wasn’t sure if she knew I knew it was her with that mask; it was impossible to read her face. Her subs vied for her attention and she petted them, as though biding her time for my compliance to join them. Pixie’s fate was now my own.

“Mistress Summer,” I said. “I’ve been a very naughty sub.”

She arched a brow.

“I’m currently on an orgasm ban.” I gave a nod, as though I’d come to terms with my fate. “Only my master may break it.”

She frowned my way.

I bowed my head.

“Let’s find your master then,” she said.

Trying not to squeal with relief, I followed Summer out and dared not look back for fear of Helete refusing to let me go.

We strolled into a large lounge that reminded me of a gentleman’s club, with its dark antique furniture and leather sofas and chairs.

This place was like the secret chambers of Chrysalis, only more intense.

Men in tuxes held subs on leashes at their feet. The pretty girls knelt in subservience. Around and about, people were fucking. Crowds had gathered to watch.

To our right, a naked woman was lying on her back on a table and she was being taken really hard by a man wearing a tux. He didn’t seem to care about her pleasure and to prove it he slapped her face.

I was just about to step in and rescue her when her legs shot up on either side of his hips and she grasped him against her. She lifted off the table and pounded him right back; she was enjoying it rough.

A tux wearing spectator neared them for a closer look. He watched with the intensity of a voyeur on a mission. With his pants unzipped and his cock out, his hand leisurely pleasuring himself, his intent became obvious. The woman’s eyes widened with glee and she opened her mouth and took him all the way in. Her hips bucked against her other master. They set a perfect rhythm. Their ménage a trois drew more people.

The crowd blocked our view.

My heart was racing, my mouth grew dry, and though turned on, I knew the danger.

Cameron had once caught me exploring Chrysalis and had yelled at me for walking around in merely a corset.

All I wore now was a skimpy half corset and my pussy was shimmering up a storm. A glitter magnet. My sex had a fricken X on it and I sensed if I stepped outside you’d catch me all the way from space.

I was my very own sex star.

And the other half of my star was out there somewhere, probably having forgotten his sub was new to all this over the top fuckery. This hardcore stuff Cameron had alluded to and Richard and once tried to keep me away from.

This was probably similar to the party shenanigans back at Chrysalis when things got swinging. With Cameron and Richard acting as the grand masters of play.

They were acclimated to this.

Unlike me.

I nudged up to Mistress Summer for protection, hoping she’d be able to scare off any of these alpha males who were zeroing in on me.

One of them headed fast in our direction.

I was whisked away on the end of a chain by Summer.

Under the archway and into another dimmed room, where more sexual exploits unfolded. Five women were going at it with each other on a central table, all arms and legs. Oral sex for some. One of them wore a strap-on and ground her female partner from behind, and in front of her lover, a woman was having her pussy licked.

Fifty or so men stood round--all of them masked, all of them wearing tuxes.

A low, sinking feeling that we weren’t here because of Cameron filled me. He’d always protected me from these kinds of soirees. He knew I wasn’t ready.

We were surrounded by visions of intimacy.

We made our way out into the night.

A sea of men in tuxes all wore masks. A wave of panic overcame me. I was never going to find Richard amongst all these suited clones. I scanned the scene of men gathered here and there, all of them engrossed in conversation.

Scantily clad women carried drinks on trays.

They, like me, would be grateful for all these patio heaters out here.

Down beyond the garden was an enormous lake and it was still like glass, and beyond that an immense shadowy woodland. On the other side of the lake stood twenty or so men in robes, all of them wearing masks, all of them performing some kind of arcane ceremony before a tall statue of a naked Venus. I recognized the sculpture from one of the paintings I’d seen at the Tate. A fire had been set at her feet.

Although I was too far away to hear what they were saying, I knew they were worshiping that statue.

“Hello, Mia,” said a crisp British accent. “How did you find my collection?”

The tall man was wearing a plague doctor’s mask. His eyes were a stunning green, and his hands were tucked casually into the pant pockets of his tux.

“I found it very interesting,” I said. “The two headed baby was a hoot.”

His green eyes lit up in a smile behind his mask.

“Mia!” another man called out.

My heart soared with happiness when I saw Richard making his way towards me through the swarm of people, slipping his mask up and resting it on his forehead.

He swept me up into his arms. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you,” he said, dropping me gently back down. “What are you wearing?”

“Not much.”

His gaze drifted toward my sex. “What have you got on your…” He gestured the rest and his eyes crinkled in amusement. “What is that?”

I threw a self-conscious glance over at Summer. “Glitter.”

Plague doctor hadn’t taken his eyes off me. If that was his collection, this was his place. I’d attracted the attention of the Tsar.

Richard removed his jacket and placed it around my shoulders to cover me. “You look cold, baby.” He arched a brow.

“Thank you.” I pulled it around me.

“We’re not staying,” said Summer. “Mia has a question for you.”

Oh jeez. I was meant to be asking permission to rejoin the girls back in the tart-a-sphere.

I rose up on my toes and whispered in his ear, “I have to talk to you privately.”

The Tsar held out his hand to Richard. “May I introduce myself?”

“Richard Booth.” He shook the Tsar’s hand.

“I’m sorry,” said Summer. “I thought you’d already been introduced. “Richard, this is the director of Oberon, our Tsar. Richard was invited by Dr. Cole—”

“Your invitation is something I would very much like to discuss,” said the Tsar.

Richard’s face became unreadable. “It’s an honor.”

“Sheppard?” a man yelled from the crowd as he hurried toward us.

The short, plump man patted Richard’s back. “Haven’t seen you since Harvard.” He slid off his mask. “How are things? You look good.”

“Remy?” said Richard, recognizing him. “How are you?”

Remy shot us a concerned look. “Haven’t interrupted anything have I?”

Summer stepped forwards. “Mr. Booth, your owlet needs your permission to fully enjoy the nest.”

Richard’s expression changed to confusion.

“Is this your submissive?” asked Remy, sounding impressed. “Fuck me, she’s hot.”

Richard was staring at the Tsar and the Tsar was staring at me.

“I was sorry to hear about your dad,” said Remy. “Terrible. I heard he still has some funds stashed away somewhere.”

Richard looked pained. “The feds took it all.”

“It wasn’t your father’s to keep,” said the Tsar.

A petite masked owlet came by and offered up a tray of drinks. The Tsar gave one to both Richard and Remy.

The Tsar took one for himself. “Will you join me in a toast? Please, share with me this Dalmore.”

Remy’s eyebrows shot up.

“We should probably go,” said Richard softly.

“The fun’s just begun,” said Remy. “How old is this?”

Richard took a sip. “Sixty-two years old. That’s why it’s called Dalmore 62.”

“Fuck me,” said Remy.

“Indeed,” said the Tsar.

A yank at my collar.

Mistress Summer gave another tug at the chain and it sent a jolt of pain into my neck.

“Shall we leave the men to enjoy their drinks?” she said.

“I have to ask him.” I rose onto my toes and whispered in Richard’s ear. “Helete’s here.”

Richard’s eyes snapped to mine. “Here?”

“Yes, in the nest.” I was too embarrassed to share in front of these men what she’d been doing. Or what they wanted to do to me.

Richard scanned the crowd and I assumed he was looking for Lance.

“We should let the ladies go,” said the Tsar. “So we can talk, Mr. Sheppard.”

“I go by Booth now.”

“You use your middle name?” said Remy. “Can’t say I blame you.”

“What did you want to talk to me about?” said Richard.

“A private matter,” said the Tsar. “Mistress Summer, perhaps you can find some pleasurable entertainment for Ms. Lauren?” He made a gesture he wanted us to go.

“Where did you find her?” said Remy, his lustful stare on me.

“Mia was a gift to Mr. Booth,” said the Tsar. “If I remember correctly?”

“A gift?” said Remy, chuckling. “And it’s not even Christmas yet.” He turned to the Tsar. “What does a man have to do to get a gift like that?”

“I’m too am intrigued,” said the Tsar. “What does one have to do?”

“I have to sit down,” said Richard, blinking. “Did you…” He shook his head. “I feel a little…”

Remy’s stare fell on his drink.

The Tsar pulled a chair over and told Richard to sit.

I knelt at Richard’s feet. “What’s wrong?”

He leaned into my ear. “I think…my drink…Mia…” He motioned to Summer then slumped back.

“Richard?” I grabbed his shirt.

“Fuck!” His eyelids closed, his head lolled, and he rubbed his eyes as though trying to keep them open.

“Should we get a doctor?” asked Remy.

“What did you do to him?” I shouted at the Tsar. “What did you put in his drink?”

Hands grabbed me and pulled me up. Two men who looked like bouncers held me back.

The Tsar was kneeling in front of Richard, whispering to him.

I tried to wriggle free.

The Tsar looked back at Summer. “Take Mia. Put her somewhere safe,” he told her.

A tug on my collar was sharp and almost pulled me over. Mistress Summer  dragged me behind her. She pulled me along the courtyard and those two men manhandled me to ensure I didn’t escape.

“I’m not leaving him,” I screamed.

Those powerful hands were impossible to break free from. In a panic, I was led past eyes that gaped from behind sinister masks.

“Please, I can’t leave him,” I said.

Once inside the house, Mistress Summer turned to face me. “Don’t make a scene, Mia. We’ve got this. He’s just had too much to drink.”

“He was fine a minute ago,” I said. “You saw that. Someone—”

“Wait.” Death doctor sprinted toward us.

My heart all but stopped as he got closer. His mask was intimidating.

He caught up and motioned for them to let me go.

The Tsar trapped me between him and the wall, looming over me. “I didn’t drug Richard. And if you ever tell anyone I did, you’ll end up in one of those glass cases. Do you understand?”

Yes, he was quite clear, and he’d also tipped his hand he’d been watching me view his fucked up and highly illegal collection.

He turned to his men. “Replay the footage.”

I yanked the chain out of Summer’s hand and ducked under the Tsar’s arm and sprinted down the hallway.

“Ms. Lauren,” the Tsar called after me. “I have a camera in every hallway and in every room. You might as well come back.”

A man casually walked towards me.

The same one who’d been stalking me was heading in my direction.

He was going to cut me off.

I bolted right and skidded along wooden floors as I turned toward a smaller hallway. A large chest was pushed up against the wall, but I had no time to hide inside it. I sprinted on.

Footsteps approached fast behind me.

I shoved open a doorway.

And flew down a stairwell.

I needed to find a phone.

Needed to call for help. Whatever they’d given Richard had affected him quickly, and I was terrified what they’d do to him. I needed to make that call and go find him as soon as possible.

Halfway down another corridor, I dodged a housekeeper and ignored her call to slow down.

A door slammed behind me.

“Mia!” a man called out.

I burst though another doorway and sprinted towards a dark wooden desk, reaching out for the phone.

My hand pulled back—

Five men stood around a roaring fireplace. They’d removed their masks and all were holding dark liquor in tumblers. Their collars were open casually, revealing they were taking a break from formality. Their tux jackets were off and strewn here and there.

“I’ll only be a second,” I told them, reaching out for the receiver.

The door flew open and a masked man stepped in. He turned and locked the exit behind him.

I was trapped between him and the desk.

The men set their drinks down.

“Hello again, Mia,” said the masked man.

Even with his face covered, I knew it was him; his arrogant gait, his sinister voice, the way he glared at me.

Lance’s strides didn’t take long to reach me. His fingers wrapped around my throat and with one hand he squeezed and pain seized me, preventing air.

Gripping his wrists, trying to ease off his fingers, I forced myself to stay conscious.

A well of panic overcame me as the men closed in.

Why weren’t they helping?

They were like a pack of wolves encircling me, or lions.

And this was their den.

“Let me go,” I wheezed.

I grabbed Lance’s pinky finger and tried to use this leverage to pull his hand off.

His ironclad grip tightened as he shoved me onto my knees. “Excuse me?”

“Sir,” I gasped.

Lance let go and stepped back.

I caressed my neck, trying to gather my thoughts, breath in the air I’d lost, ready to spring to my feet and run. “Have to get back to Richard,” I rasped.

That damage to my throat wasn’t permanent, I prayed.

Remembering Shay’s training, I flew into action, trying to shake them off as I went for the door.

There were too many of them and their restraint came easily. They dragged me back into the center with terrible force, their grips on my limbs overwhelming.

I was thrown to my knees before Lance.

“I need a little help to fulfill her kink,” said Lance darkly. “No means yes, if you’re wondering.”

A wave of nausea.

My heart beat its way out my chest.

Our invitation to Oberon Grove had come through Lance. A trap we’d walked right into it.

“We aim to please,” said one of the men.

Lance gestured to me. “Gentleman.”

CHAPTER 29

“THE DIVINE FEMALE is bold, she is righteous, she is brave,” Dr. Finley’s words found me again.

But made no sense here. As though my subconscious was sending a message I couldn’t grasp. My thoughts jumbled…

As they shoved me over that dark wooden desk and my head slammed against it, my mind scrambled for a lifeline, my body halfway between resisting and letting go. Richard’s jacket was ripped from me.

Futility soaked into my bones.

On the other side of the desk, my hands were captured in front of me, and behind me a man’s fingers felt along my thigh. To my right stood another, his hands rough at my neck, holding me down.

Lance watched.

“Don’t. I don’t want this,” I begged. “Please, let me go.”

Cruel laughter from those who didn’t care.

My thoughts dragged me far from here. High into the air. In a helicopter. Cameron’s. Flying to Big Bear to meet…what was her name?

Jasmine.

Her words flittered and waned, “Oh no, this can’t be happening to me. What’s going on? Who are you?” She’d feigned mock horror, retelling her fake rape at Pendulum.

Even though I begged them to stop, they wouldn’t. They believed I wanted this.

A swinging pendulum.

To and fro.

If I cried out for them to stop, the more aggressive they’d be.

A sob.

“Save yourself, Mia,” Dr. Finley’s words. “Only then can you save them.”

Fingers slipping down my spine.

A pendulum.

To and fro. To and fro. To and fro.

“Mia,” Cameron’s voice soothed from somewhere within. “Your intuition is giving you the answer.”

Fingers explored, preparing to own. Jolting me forwards.

Jasmine’s face, her words spilling like water…saying something about…

Pendulum.

The answer was Pendulum.

“Lance, I know what really happened that night,” I burst out. “I know what happened to your daughter.”

“Shut the fuck up,” he snapped.

Someone banged on the door. The Tsar’s voice yelled from the other side. Summer’s voice rose over his.

“You’ve got it wrong,” I said. “Cameron didn’t hurt your daughter. He saved her.”

A sting at my scalp as I was forcefully pulled upright.

Lance glared into my eyes. “Cameron Cole brutally attacked my daughter. He put her in the hospital. That’s what happened.”

“What is this?” said someone from behind me.

“No,” I told Lance. “Cameron was called to Pendulum as a doctor. He was called to talk Arabella off the roof of Pendulum after she freaked out. It was another man—”

A slap across my face knocked me backwards.

More frantic banging on the door.

I steadied my feet. “Listen to me,” I yelled. “Arabella went to Pendulum to meet a congressman. Something happened there between them. He triggered her bipolar disorder. She ran to the roof and threatened to jump. That congressman phoned Cameron in the middle of the night and begged him to come to Pendulum. When Cameron turned up, Arabella was on the roof. He talked her away from the ledge, talked her out of jumping. He took her to the hospital. Cameron saved her life!”

Lance’s face contorted in pain. “You’re fucking lying.”

“Arabella lives in Seattle now, right?” I said. “She works at a hotel…a Ritz Carlton?”

Lance stepped back, shaking his head.

“What the hell is going on?” a voice hissed behind me.

The men stepped back.

“Ask your wife,” I said softly. “Ask Helete.”

“Helete?”

“Yes, she knows it wasn’t Cameron.”

“She wouldn’t lie to me,” said Lance. “Doesn’t make any sense.”

A crash.

The door flew open as someone kicked it in.

Cameron sprinted towards me, grabbing me up in his arms. Shay was right behind him, followed by the Tsar and Summer.

“We didn’t touch her,” said one of the men.

Helete entered the room, her face full of anguish. “What’s going on?”

I pointed at her. “You’re a scheming bitch, that’s what’s going on.”

“Mia,” Summer chastised me.

“No, listen,” I said. “Forget all that hippo stuff and tell them what really happened.” I swept Richard’s jacket up from the floor and pulled it around me.

“It’s HIPAA, Mia,” said Cameron. “It’s private. I… can’t.”

“Everyone out,” yelled Shay. “Now.” He pointed to Lance and Helete. “You’re staying.”

The men grabbed their jackets and seemed all too happy to leave, trotting out one after the other.

“We’re not going anywhere,” said Mistress Summer. “You’re going to tell us what the hell is going on.”

“Will you take that mask off,” Helete snapped at the Tsar.

He merely stared back at her through his mask, saying nothing.

“Tell him, Helete,” I said. “Tell your husband it wasn’t Cameron who hurt Arabella. Cameron refuses to tell Lance the truth because he cares more about your daughter than you do.”

“That’s not true,” she said. “I was there too. I saw the state Arabella was in.”

“Arabella told me it was Cameron,” said Lance. “She remembers little other than what you did to her.” Lance glared at him.

“It’s a false memory,” I said. “Her consciousness fractured. Her memories are unstable.”

Cameron pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Not even now,” I said to him. “You won’t tell Lance the truth?”

Cameron gave a sympathetic frown. “Not without Arabella’s consent.”

“Why did you let me believe it was him?” said Lance, glaring at Helete.

“I didn’t think you’d do this,” she snapped.

“But why?” he yelled.

“To protect Daniel,” she snapped. “Afterward, at the hospital, he promised to make it up to us if we didn’t press charges against him. Arabella met him at one of our fund raising events. I had no idea they were going to spend time at Pendulum together. Daniel pushed Arabella too far.”

“How did she end up at Pendulum?” asked Lance, weakly.

Helete flinched. “Daniel wanted to take her to Chrysalis. She was too young to attend. So he took her to Pendulum instead.”

“He raped her?” said Lance.

Helete threw up her hands. “It was a mess. I was trying to protect you.”

“She’s your daughter,” I said.

“I didn’t know until afterwards what happened to her,” said Helete. “She didn’t tell me she was going to Pendulum. I’d have stopped her. How do you think I feel?”

“I’m going to kill Daniel,” said Lance, dazed. “Why did you lie to me, Helete? All this time…” He looked over at Cameron.

Helete cringed. “Daniel was the reason you got elected. He made it happen. He made it up to us.”

“You’re insane,” snapped Lance.

I stepped forwards and said, “So you can drop your vendetta and leave us alone.”

Lance looked devastated.

I turned to face the Tsar. “Now where the hell is my boyfriend?”

CHAPTER 30

“WILL YOU PLEASE stop looking at my pussy,” I whispered to Shay.

He whispered back, “Sorry, Mia, it’s like you’ve developed a new super power down there.”

I thumped his arm.

He was trying to comfort me. We’d all huddled in one of the bedrooms at Oberon Grove, waiting for Richard to recover. The Tsar and Summer stood in the corner, whispering. They really did look devastated.

Shay leaned in towards me and whispered, “Solar eclipse comes to mind.”

I thumped his arm.

“Stop shouting,” said Richard. “My head’s going to explode.”

“Drink,” insisted Cameron, holding the glass of water up against his mouth.

Richard sat up, his back resting against the headboard, his eyes squeezed shut, a cold cloth on his forehead. Cameron believed Lance had dosed his drink with Rohypnol, but he wasn’t sure. Richard couldn’t remember much.

And right now he was refusing to go the hospital.

I sat beside him on the bed and brushed a wayward strand of hair out of his face. “At least get a blood test.”

“You worry too much.” He peeked at me through one eye.

“We had nothing to do with this,” said Summer, placing my clothes on a chair. “You believe that, right?”

“I’ve known the Tsar a long time, Summer,” said Cameron. “You needn’t worry.”

This seemed to comfort her.

“How embarrassing,” said Richard, “My first time here and I end up sleeping.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” I said. “We think—”

Cameron nudged my arm. “Let’s give him some time, okay?”

I swallowed hard, realizing Richard had forgotten my conversation with him in the garden about Helete and Lance being here.

Richard rested his head back and dosed off.

Cameron rose from the bed, gathered up my clothes from the chair, and tipped his head toward the bathroom, gesturing me to follow.

Once inside, he placed my clothes on the countertop and found a wash cloth, running it under warm water before approaching. “Let’s get you glitter free before you blind someone.”

My heart skipped a beat. He was going to touch me. Down there.

After giving a nod of permission and trying to hold back on a swoon, I succumbed to his gentle strokes between my thighs.

Healing came with gentle sweeps over my sex. Cameron’s gift of making things right. Soothing me. A loving, tender touch.

His frown deepened. “Did those men hurt you?”

I shook my head. “You got here just in time.”

His expression was solemn.  “Did they touch you, Mia?”

“They held me over the desk,” I said. “Nothing really happened.”

The wash cloth paused where he held it and his face looked pained. “I see.”

“I’m fine, really. Richard’s going to be okay too.”

“Yes, he is.”

“When the car picked us up outside the pub,” I said. “We thought it was your Rolls. The car was sent by Lance. I should have looked at the number plate.”

“This isn’t your fault, Mia. Or Richard’s.”

“The driver told us you’d arranged our visit here.”

“So I heard.”

“Lance lied to the Tsar and Summer too?”

“Yes,” he said, drying me off with a soft plush towel.

It was nice to have this intimacy between us again, this closeness, his gentleness I’d never take for granted.

I miss you.

“Everything’s going to be fine,” he said.

“I know.”

He shook his head and I hated seeing him anguished.

“Lance believed us, didn’t he?” I said. “He won’t come after me again?”

“He knows the truth now,” said Cameron.

“What will happen between him and Helete?”

“Frankly, I don’t care.”

“Do you think they’ll divorce?”

He gave a shrug.

“Surely he’ll leave us all alone now he knows the truth?”

“One would hope so.”

“If Lance is so rich, why does Arabella work in a hotel?”

“She needed normalcy. For people not to know who she was. I helped find her a job that didn’t challenge her too much but at the same time kept her busy.”

“I’ll honor her confidentiality.”

“That’s why I’m comfortable telling you this.” His gaze rose to meet mine. “So, what did you see while you were here?”

“Summer took me into the nest.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, I saw...”

“I can only imagine.”

“I liked it.”

“The pursuit of female pleasure is the owlet’s dictum.”

“A what?”

His eyes narrowed, showing his amusement. “A mandate. Their slogan.”

“I’m so glad you’re here.”

Cameron’s stare lingered on mine and he kissed my forehead.

“Who is the Tsar?” I said.

Cameron handed me my dress. “The owner of Oberon Grove.”

“Yes, but who is he?”

“He’s of no concern.”

I almost shared he’d threatened to put me inside one of his fucked up glass cases but thought better of it, unsure if Cameron knew about the Tsar’s collection.

Cameron reached out and held my shoulders. “I feel terrible. It’s because of me you ended up here. I put you in danger.” He shook his head woefully. “I wasn’t there for you when you needed me the most.”

“You were.”

He frowned at me.

“I heard your voice,” I said softly. “In that room. While they were touching me. You spoke to me via my subconscious. You told me what to do. What to say. You were there, Cameron.”

He stuttered a breath and his eyes watered.

“You saved me,” I whispered.

He motioned for me to turn around and zipped up the back of my dress. “Let’s go home.”

Within a few minutes, we’d rallied Richard from the bed and made our way out into the night. Richard climbed into the back of the Rolls and flopped onto the leather seat and I followed and sat beside him. Shay joined us and helped Richard get comfortable. We’d been given our phones back and I was happy to tuck mine into my bag. Never again would I allow anyone to part me from it.

From outside the car, Cameron talked with the driver. He motioned to us he was going to say goodbye to the Tsar and Summer. They stood near the fountain and chatted away. Cameron looked like he was trying to reassure Summer. She still looked distraught.

The lights of the fountain gave the sprays of water a blue tinge as it arched high, cascading dramatically into the fountain. Those three horses paused mid-leap halfway out, their hooves galloping free.

Summer threw me a wave.

I waved back, my cheeks blushing as my thoughts carried into the room she’d readied me in and that sensuous preparation. That room filled with owlets. That girl with the pixie haircut.

When we’d first arrived, Summer had held all the power and wielded it like the queen of the vixens, and now in typical Cameron Cole style he’d regained control.

I wondered how Richard would react when I told him what I’d been up to.

“Some more water?” I offered him a bottle.

He gestured he didn’t want it. “Can you turn the air up?”

The driver pushed a button and cold air streamed on us.

“How did you know we were here?” I whispered to Shay.

With a smirk, he reached out and touched my earlobe.

My hand shot to my sapphire earring.

“It was precautionary,” said Shay.

Richard blinked at him. “You put a GPS tracker on my girlfriend?”

Shay shrugged.

“Jeez,” said Richard. “Cameron’s incorrigible.”

Despite hating the idea, it had actually saved us, and from Richard’s expression he was thinking that too. I thought back to that bracelet Cameron had once gifted to me and wondered if it had served as a tracking device too, right up until Richard had broken it. From Cameron’s expression, it was pretty significant. I still missed the feel of it on my wrist.

I wondered what Cameron was saying to the Tsar and Summer. Their conversation looked calm enough. The Tsar was still wearing his plague doctor mask.

“He still hasn’t taken it off,” I said.

“What’s that, Mia?” asked Shay.

“The Tsar. Why doesn’t he take his mask off?”

Shay stared past me and his frown deepened.

Lance and Helete withdrew from the house and headed on over to talk with Cameron.

“Open the door, please,” said Shay sternly.

The driver glanced at him in the rearview.

“The door,” snapped Shay, “Open it. Now.”

Like a silent film, the drama played out.

Arching blue water created a dramatic backdrop to the unfolding violence.

Cameron threw another punch at Lance and had him by the collar. He pushed him towards the fountain, shoving Lance backwards into the water. Lance’s arms flailed, and his legs lifted high off the ground as his head was held under.

Drowning.

Helete screaming.

The Tsar and Summer struggled to pull Cameron off him.

Shay yelled at the driver, “Open the fucking door before I break it open.”

“What the fuck is Lance doing here?” said Richard, trying to get out. “Open the door.”

“You don’t remember?” I said.

“I don’t care what Cameron told you,” yelled Shay, leaping over the front seat and startling the driver. “Open it.”

The doors clicked open and we bundled out, Shay, Richard and I bolting toward them.

We joined the Tsar in dragging Cameron back.

Lance slumped down the side of the fountain.

CHAPTER 31

THAT GIRL STARING back at me in the mirror wasn’t the same Mia.

I’d tried to be perfect in an imperfect world.

Those bags under my eyes revealed a night of partying gone awry. This frown gave away the horrors hidden in dark shadowy corners of Oberon Grove. The memory of being thrust over that desk and surrounded by all those men brought a wave of panic. My mind transported me all the way into the nightmare and held me suspended there. The danger Lance had put Richard in, and Cameron’s violence outside the house proved if pushed too far, he, like the rest of us, could snap. His usual cool demeanor had been lost to the pain of frustration after seeing his friends in danger.

That strange man in a plague doctor mask had refused to take it off. There was more to Oberon Grove that everyone was letting on. Another world strewn with layers upon layers of secrets.

I was glad to be back in Chelsea Crescent.

Forcing a smile, the one I’d be holding when I rejoined Cameron, Richard, and Shay downstairs for breakfast, I refused to let Lance or Helete ruin today. This was Christmas and I was, after all, spending it in London.

And this was my body and this was my life. I wasn’t going to let anyone muddle my brain into thinking otherwise.

My flesh had cracked in that room, but what was left wasn’t a broken girl but a more empowered woman. My jaw tightened with the realization I was stronger than I knew and it felt pretty damn good.

I threw a quick text to Bailey and Tara, and even one to Lorraine too, wishing them all a Merry Christmas. Messaging Bailey back and forth, I told her I’d be bringing her something special back from London and she sent me a bunch of questions, which I promised to answer in person once I got back. We were due for a best friend day. For her, it would soon be evening in L.A., but here on the other side of the world our day was just getting started.

Head held high, I descended the stairs.

Pausing on the last step, I sucked in my breath—

Richard’s voice sounded panicked. “Tell me they didn’t touch her. Tell me she’s okay.”

“We got there in time,” said Cameron. “She’s fine.”

“I didn’t know,” said Richard. “I let Summer take her off. I let Lance get to her. Those fucking men. They’re dead. They’re all dead. I’m going to get their names—”

“Take a breath,” said Shay.

“You’ve seen Mia,” said Cameron. “She’s coping well. We’ll have a session—”

“Which hotel is he in?” snapped Richard. “You should have killed him last night. I’m going to finish the job.”

I stepped into the room. “Good morning,” I said, throwing a wave. “I have an announcement to make.”

Cameron, Shay, and Richard turned to look at me.

“I am going to do something daring this morning,” I told them. “I’m going to push the boundaries of what is possible.”

Their frowns deepened.

The tension hung thick.

“I’m making my boys breakfast,” I said. “And it’s going to be the best Christmas morning ever.”

“Mia,” said Richard, stepping forward.

“No.” I shot up my hand. “You can’t stop me. I’ve already decided. I googled waffles. I’ve got this.” I pointed at Richard. “Set the table, please.” Then at Cameron. “How about you make us some coffee?” And I pointed to a cupboard. “Shay, you can help me get the waffle maker down.”

“Shouldn’t we talk about it?” said Richard softly.

“Well, if you’d rather make the coffee,” I said.

Richard came closer, grabbed me into his arms, and hugged me. “God, Mia Lauren, I love you so much.”

I hugged him back. “I know, right? Move over, Barefoot Contessa. Mia Lauren is in the house.”

That look on Cameron’s face was pride.

It took some persuading, but I managed to kick the men out of the kitchen so I could get going on my culinary masterpiece.

The mood lifted as I served them waffles and pancakes with bananas, and syrup, and enough coffee to satisfy our caffeine fix. It was wonderful to see them all relax, and despite their initial reluctance I got them to wear the paper hats we’d gotten out of the Christmas crackers we’d popped last night.

That seemed to lift the mood, and despite all of them looking for signs in me of residual emotional trauma from last night, they’d not be seeing any.

“Did Richard tell you?” I said. “He saved a man’s life.”

“Really?” said Cameron.

“It was nothing,” said Richard. “A man had a heart attack and I resuscitated him.”

“Doesn’t sound like nothing to me,” said Shay. “Sounds very heroic.”

“Which hospital did they take him to?” asked Cameron. “I can check in on him if you like.”

“They won’t tell you anything,” said Richard. “Trust me. It was something anyone could have done.”

“Everyone else was just standing around,” I said. “You saved him.”

“Everyone’s a hero in your eyes, Mia,” said Richard. “My grandmother had a saying about good people like you, ‘All your geese are swans.’”

“What does that mean?” I asked.

“It means you always think the best of everyone,” said Cameron, “and it’s so endearing.”

“The world is a dark, evil place, Mia,” said Shay. “We need to keep you safe from it.”

“I believe I’ve proven I can look after myself,” I said.

“That’s what we’re here for,” said Richard. “You’ve gotten your very own brat pack looking out for you.”

I beamed at them.

With Christmas music playing in the background, we sat on the floor and huddled around the tree.

I handed them their presents. Shay ripped open his first and smiled when he unraveled the cashmere scarf.

“It’s chilly in L.A.,” I said. “So you’ll be nice and toasty.”

He wrapped it around his neck and it looked great on him. That European loop he gave it made him look super sexy.

“Here you go,” I said to Cameron, as I handed over his.

He peeled back the wrapping and flipped open the small black box. His breath stilted.

“What is it?” said Richard.

“Cufflinks,” said Cameron. “Mia, they’re wonderful. Thank you.”

He stared down at the miniature Royal Crowns.

“Their design is based on—”

“The Tower of London.” His gaze held mine. “Thank you, Mia. They’re perfect.”

I was so happy to see he liked it. “Okay, now you, Richard.” I gave him his gift and watched him as he ripped it open.

He pulled out the tiny brass Buddha statue.

“Give it a shake,” I said. “It has a small metal bead inside it. Tibetan monks made it. And here’s your other gift.”

“Mia it’s wonderful,” he said, beaming. “I love it.” He unraveled the second gift and pulled out a bracelet of small jade beads.

“That was made by Tibetan monks too,” I said. “I want it to keep you safe when you go off on your adventures. I support your adrenaline junkie lifestyle and I want you to know that.”

He pulled on the bracelet. “Mia, thank you. This means the world to me.”

“I got them all from Fortnum and Mason,” I said. “They’re all classy gifts.”

“We can see that, Mia,” said Cameron. “Well done.”

Richard shook the small Buddha close to his ear. “It’s a prayer bead.”

“It is?” I said.

He gave a nod. “Yes, you’re meant to shake it to center yourself. It’s a reminder to bring you back to the present.”

I sat back on my heels.

Richard added, “Buddha will watch over us when we sleep.”

“Now it’s our turn,” said Shay. “This one is from me.”

I ripped the card open and read inside. “Really?” I all but freaked out.

Shay had gifted me fencing lessons. I leaped up and hugged him, so excited by the idea of learning such an elegant sport.

“These guys keep buying you jewelry and clothes,” he said, amused. “Women are so hard to buy for.”

“It’s perfect, Shay. Thank you so much,” I said.

Cameron handed me a small wrapped gift and I made my way into it. Flipping open the lid, I found a small plastic key inside.

“It’s symbolic,” he said. “Your gift is waiting for you back in L.A.”

I peered up at him, wondering what it represented. “Is it a key to Chrysalis?”

Richard blinked at him. “You got her a car?”

“Well have you seen hers?” said Cameron. “The oil leaks.”

“A car?” said Richard.

Staring down at the key, I wondered if accepting such an amazing gift was something I could do, and from Richard’s face I knew he was having a hard time with it.

“It’s a BMW,” said Cameron. “Nothing flashy.”

“It is kind of flashy,” I said. “It’s amazing.”

“We want you to be safe.” He turned to Richard. “We can’t have her on the freeway in that old mini.”

“She could always use one of mine,” said Richard. “She knows that.”

Cameron gave me a look. “Don’t make a fuss. It’s nothing.”

Richard rolled his eyes at him.

I looked over at Richard to see if he was going to let me keep it, unsure if I was worthy of such a gift.

“Well?” said Richard. “Say thank you, Mia.”

Still unsure about it, I threw my arms around Cameron’s neck. “I’ll make it up to you.”

“It’s a gift,” he said, easing my arms off him. “You don’t have to make anything up to me.”

Richard nudged an oblong box my way. Inside rested the most beautiful pair of strappy heels. Black soles and silver straps encrusted with tiny crystals.

“They’re Valentino,” he said. “They’ll look amazing on you.”

“They’re incredible,” I said, my eyes watering.

“No you don’t,” said Cameron. “We care deeply for you Mia and love having you around.”

Richard’s eyes snapped over to him.

I leaned over and gave Richard a big hug. “I love them.”

“Come on,” said Shay, pushing himself to his feet. “Let’s show you a few fencing moves.”

“Show me a parry,” I said, remembering Cameron once mentioning he’d like to teach me that one.

It had been during my spying trip around Cameron’s Beverly Hills home, where I’d caught him and Shay thrusting sabers at each other in the sports hall. Cameron had wanted to show me a parry, which was used to deflect or block an attack.

“How about some more coffee?” said Cameron.

“Love some,” said Richard.

“I’ll get it.” I headed for the kitchen.

“I’m about to perform one of my most daring exploits yet,” said Richard darkly.

I turned round to face him, unsteady on my feet.

“This kind of reminds me of the day I leaped off the Eiffel Tower,” said Richard. “Not sure whether I’d live or die.”

“What are you going to do?” I asked nervously.

His eyes glinted with mischief. “I’m going to have some of your apple crumble.”

I ran back and punched his arm.

Richard fell back in a heap of laughter.

CHAPTER 32

LATER THAT EVENING I flew into a panic.

I’d gone to Cameron’s bedroom to talk about his gift and tell him I couldn’t accept something as incredible as a car. Only I’d found his wardrobe empty and his suitcase gone.

I took two stairs at a time and burst into the kitchen. Shay sat alone at the counter. He sipped on a coffee. “Richard’s in the gym,” he said. “He’s working off your apple crumble.”

“Where’s Cameron?” I said.

“You just missed him. You were taking a nap. He didn’t want to wake you.”

“Did he leave?”

“He’s heading back to L.A. He’s got a ton of work waiting for him.”

“But it’s still Christmas day.”

Dread swept over me.

Shay lowered his gaze.

I bolted down the hallway.

“You’ll need an umbrella,” he shouted after me.

I shoved open the door and ran into the front yard, sprinting through the gate, rain pouring and soaking me.

A Rolls Royce pulled away from the curb. I ran alongside it and slammed my hand against the window.

The car jolted to a stop.

The back window slid down.

“You weren’t going to say goodbye?” I said.

Cameron looked harried. “Mia, go back inside.”

“You didn’t come find me?”

He sucked in a breath. “I didn’t want to wake you.”

“I deserve a goodbye,” I said. “After everything we’ve shared.”

“You’re right of course,” he said calmly. “Goodbye, Mia.”

I stomped my foot. “No, I deserve a proper goodbye.”

“Spending time with you…” He stared off. “It’s been effective.”

“Effective?”

“Yes. We’ve both benefited from this.”

“Where are you?” I said. “Where’s my kind, thoughtful Cameron? I need him right now. I need you.”

He shook his head. “It’ll get easier. I promise.”

“But it can’t end like this,” I said. “With you driving off and not looking back.”

“Please, Mia, you’re getting soaked. I’ll see you in L.A.” He gestured to the driver. “Go, please.”

“Wait,” I snapped at the driver.

Cameron lowered his head. “We knew this day would come. I’m sorry if I didn’t prepare you for it better.”

“Are you ever going to tell me how you feel about me?” I stared at his beautiful face, needing to hear those words he’d never spoken.

“You are…” He measured his words. “My finest work.”

The window slid up and the car pulled away.

I stood there staring, my throat tight with anguish. As I heaved breaths, I found the weight of each one too heavy to bear.

The car stopped.

Cameron got out and ran back to me. I sprinted to meet him halfway and fell into his arms.

Safe.

This man who knew me so well, understood my needs, and helped me laugh at my quirks. The man who’d saved me from my past.

I wanted to beg him not to go, but at the same time I feared I’d disappoint him.

I peered into his eyes. “You’re getting wet too now.”

He hugged me into him. “It’s just rain.”

Pressing my face against his chest, I let out a sob. “I’ll be good. I promise.”

He planted kiss after kiss to the top of my head, with his strong arms wrapped around me.

Holding his gaze, I waited for him to say those words he knew I needed to hear.

I blinked raindrops off my lashes. “You taught me how to read the secret language of the heart. I know.”

“Shush.”

“Cameron?”

He looked past me. “Take her inside.”

I turned to see Shay holding an umbrella.

Cameron nudged me towards him. Shay took my hand and pulled me away, through the gate, and back into the house. Glancing back, Cameron stood stock still on the pavement staring after us. Rain fell on him, but he didn’t seem to care.

Shay shut the door behind us, pulled closed the umbrella, and rested it in the corner.

“I’ll make you a nice cup of tea,” he said, taking my hand and guiding me into the kitchen. He grabbed a tea towel and used it to dry my hair.

I stared ahead, taking deep painful breaths. “What am I going to do?”

“What we all do, Mia,” said Shay. “We fuck the pain away.”

“What if that doesn’t work?”

“Then we use pain,” he said.

Cameron’s words came back to me. “It’s what we do here,” he’d said, sitting beside me in the garden of Enthrall. “We control with pain. Balance pleasure with pain. Banish pain with pain.”

And in that upscale restaurant, Chez Polidor, Cameron had admitted he too was into pain.

It hit me like a lightning bolt.

Cameron was using his feelings for me to punish himself.

The realization stunned me into silence.

CHAPTER 33

NAKED IN THE center of the bedroom, my arms clutched to my chest, my breaths came short and sharp.

Christmas evening and all was still in the house.

Cameron was long gone, having caught his flight at Heathrow hours ago, and would be in mid-air by now. Shay continued to guard us discreetly from somewhere in the house.

Though Lance’s threat seemed like it was over now, wariness waited in the shadows, biding time until my thoughts lost their strength to block these memories that seeped in.

Richard ran his fingers through my hair. “Baby, we need to talk.”

I agreed with a nod.

“Tell me what those men did to you?”.

In the corner sat a big leather chair. The left foot was slightly crooked, buckling under years of people sitting in it. I wondered if Richard ever sat in it.

“Oberon Grove has a camera in every room,” he said softly. “Summer watched the footage.”

My gaze snapped to his.

“Cameron gave me Summer’s number,” he said. “I phoned her. She told me what happened to you.”

“The nest?” I shook my head. “I only watched the women. I didn’t do anything.”

“Nest?”

Oh, he wasn’t talking about that.

I stared off.

That crackling fire. That phone within reach. Those men in tuxes. The locking of a door…

“You’re here with me and you’re safe.” Richard raised my chin. “I know they touched you. You should feel no shame. You did nothing wrong.”

He pressed a fingertip to my lips. “You begged them to let you go.”

“They thought I wanted it to happen.”

“At Chrysalis, no means no. Use that word and all play stops.” He shook his head woefully. “Lance will pay.”

“How?”

“You don’t need to worry about that.”

“Please don’t do anything illegal.”

“He’s banned from Chrysalis and Enthrall. He’s banned from Oberon, and so is Helete.”

“Is their threat over?”

“Yes.”

“They won’t come after me again?”

“They have no reason to,” he said. “Cameron and Lance spoke on the phone this morning.” Richard pulled me into a hug. “It’s over.”

“Does that mean Shay won’t need to follow me around everywhere?”

“Once Cameron’s paranoia has lifted. For now you’ll still have someone watching over you.”

I wasn’t sure I liked the sound of that. My privacy had been compromised this entire trip. Going home knowing there were people out there following me around made me antsy.

I eased my collar away from my neck.

“Too tight?” Richard ran a finger beneath it.

“Hold me.”

He pulled me in and hugged me. “We’ll find our way back, Mia. And we’ll be stronger and more together than we ever were.”

“Yes.” I squeezed my eyes shut, needing this to be true.

He eased me back and grabbed my shoulders. “I’m going to heal what happened to you.” He strolled over to the chest of drawers and removed a lace blindfold. “Arms behind your back, please.”

He’d ordered me into the pose and I obeyed, my eyes fluttering with expectation, my heart scrambling for cover.

A swinging pendulum.

Above that fireplace in that room back at Oberon Grove had hung a painting of a fox hunt with men atop horses, their expressions proud, those dogs at their feet ready for the order to chase.

Ready to rip that fox apart.

Those men had hardly touched me yet my mind took me to the place where they had, betraying me with thoughts of what could have happened.

Richard scrolled down his phone and the sound of soft rolling waves came from it and filled the room.

“This is my way of taking you back to Malibu.” He secured the blindfold around my eyes. “I’m going to replace those thoughts. I’m going to bring you back to me. Can I make love to you?”

“Yes.”

Yes.

His mouth was on mine, firm but gentle, easing mine open. His tongue searched, explored, soothed.

Kisses, there were lots of kisses, and caressing. I swooned at the pleasure he brought, the suckling at my breasts, his teeth grazing my nipples, the pang below causing shivers.

He nudged me back and I toppled onto the bed.

Taking his time, he made love to me, planting soft kisses at my feet, his mouth leisurely moving from one toe to the next, moving upward, trailing between my thighs.

His mouth settled on my sex and his tongue flitted, circled, flicked.

Arching my back, I lifted my hips, offering more of me.

His body crushed against mine. “My cock has magic powers.” He nipped my ear.

“Is that right?” I giggled.

“Oh yes. May I provide a demonstration?”

“Why yes, sir.”

He whispered into my ear, “I’m going to erase the past.”

Gently, he positioned the tip of his cock at my entrance, his hips rocking so he tapped against me, rendering pleasure.

“Please,” I begged.

“Shush. Nice and slow, baby.”

Wrapping my legs around his hips, spellbound, I moved closer to edge of forgetting.

“Please, sir,” I whispered.

This gentle tapping, this easing inside, this stretching wide. He raised himself to change his angle and penetrate deeper, working himself inside me and reminding me once again he’d mastered the art of pleasuring a woman so very long ago. His ability to seduce was breathtaking.

While gliding in and out languidly, his mouth eased mine open. Our tongues battling, his for control, mine to prove he had it.

Richard’s body trembled with the pressure of his closeness. This was him proving he knew what I needed, not violence, not punishment, not even domination, but love.

His breathing stilted as his time neared yet he continued on and on, focusing on my pleasure alone, goading me, grinding, circling.

I plunged into this sea of sensation. Ocean waves crashed around us. Their insistent rhythm seduced and I gave myself over, arching my back, feeling his warmth filling me as we went under together.

CHAPTER 34

ROLLING WAVES CRASHED over golden sands.

Turning slightly, I gazed up at the majestic Mediterranean styled house on the hill. The place Richard and I called home.

I was thrilled to be back in Malibu. I’d only returned two days ago and it felt wonderful.

London had been a whirlwind of time spent with Cameron, running from Lance Merrill, and trying to settle back as Richard’s sub. My head still spun with all that had happened. My heart, though battered and bruised, still felt capable of so much love.

A piece of me was missing and I couldn’t work out why.

I was not the same Mia who’d stood here on this beach looking out at the vast ocean all those weeks ago, wishing Richard would train me into the submissive he yearned for. During his beachfront party, I’d learned my fate. The news was delivered that I’d be given over to Cameron Cole, nudging my future in a dramatically different direction.

That same evening, Scarlet had joined me here on this very sand and had taken my breath away with her words of what it meant to serve a master, and more profound still her foreshadowing I was ready for Chrysalis.

Her stark prediction of how it would change me.

And it had.

Before I’d entered that great house, Cameron had warned me, his tone firm and menacing, ‘I will take you further than you have gone before. What will be left of you is that which you do not believe exists within you. I will destroy you. I will burn away this façade and I will reveal the true Mia.’

Changed forever.

It made me wonder if the outcome both he and Richard had expected had gone awry. Now my confidence soared, my self-respect was at an all time high, and my new passion had turned to philosophy.

These last few days had seen me tucked in a corner, a book open on my lap, devouring every word on every page, absorbing knowledge with newfound joy.

This world held so many questions, an unending array of whys, wheres, hows and what ifs. My widening perspective drew me onward into the unknown.

Taking several refreshing breaths in, I headed back up the pathway and on towards the house.

Winston ran from plant to plant marking his territory.

“Not the flowers,” I scolded him, though considering he’d been taught this since a puppy the chance of him ever behaving was unlikely. He didn’t even sulk when scolded, merely looked up at me lovingly as though waiting for a snack.

I made coffee and carried a mug into the bedroom. Richard was fast asleep. He looked so beautiful, so peaceful, with his head resting on that pillow, those ruffled sheets askew.

Gently, I ran my fingers through his hair. “Wake up. We’ll be late.”

He stirred. “What time is it?”

“8AM.”

He sat up, his hands rubbing his face. “Damn jet lag. It’s always worse coming home for some reason.”

I handed him his coffee. “This will help.”

“Thank you.” Richard took it from me and sipped. “All hail the caffeine God.”

I melted into those blue eyes. They were so alluring, so kind.

“How about I drive us in?” I said. “You can sleep in the car if you like.”

“Eager to drive your gift from Cameron?” he said.

“I’m not going to keep it. It doesn’t feel right.”

My new silver BMW sat in the driveway. A stunning reminder of the kind of money that flowed around here. That new car smell had stirred excitement, but reality had sunk in that it would never be mine. The loss of my mini brought a wave of nostalgia. Cameron had confiscated it.

Other than this act of control, I hadn’t heard from him.

“Well you can leave it at Chrysalis when you visit later,” said Richard. “Have Leo bring you back. But don’t be surprised if you don’t rile up Cameron’s wrath.”

I’d be seeing him again. “Chrysalis?”

“You have an appointment this afternoon.” He took another sip. “Great coffee, Mia.”

“Why?”

“You didn’t think you’d gotten out of math that easily did you?”

“I hate math.”

“From all accounts, you’re a great student.”

“What time?”

“2PM,” he said. “Gives you enough time to settle back into Enthrall. We only have one client on the books this afternoon and I can welcome them.”

“I have so much catching up to do,” I said. “Maybe I can resume my lessons in a week or so? I’m kind of jet lagged too.”

“Say thank you.”

I lowered my gaze. “Thank you, sir.”

There was gratitude for Richard allowing me to study on work time, only I wasn’t sure I was ready to see Cameron again so soon.

A lump caught in my throat.

I didn’t trust myself not to crumble at Cameron’s feet, beg him to hold me one more time. I’d embarrass myself and betray Richard all over again and ruin my self-respect.

From Richard’s stare, he might have been thinking that too.

“I like the new playroom.” I quickly changed the subject. “Perhaps…tonight?”

“You feel ready?”

“Yes. More than anything.”

“Pleasure or pain, Mia?”

A thrum settled low in my belly. “Both.”

“You always favored pleasure?”

I sucked in my breath. “Whatever you deem me worthy of?”

Winston leaped up on the side of the bed and I leaned in to kiss him, so grateful for his ability to break the tension at the perfect time. He always sensed when we needed a time out.

I stood. “I’ll feed him.”

Richard nuzzled into Winston’s head. “Someone needs a bath.”

Winston jumped down and ran after me.

“Yes, mister,” shouted Richard. “Don’t think I’ll forget. Tonight, you’re both getting taken care of.”

I stopped in the doorway. “Roll on tonight then.”

Richard smirked. “Careful what you wish for.”

“Goes both ways.”

Richard sat up. “What does that mean exactly?”

“These lessons you’ve got me taking,” I said. “They’re teaching me an awful lot. Are you sure you don’t want to keep the old Mia?”

“Remember what I once told you? I want you to reach your full potential.”

Resting my hands on my hips, I turned to look at him. “Potential?”

“If Cameron has anything to do with it, you’ll be on a fast track to a PHD.”

“In fashion?”

“No, Mia. In the subject you thrive in.”

“Which one is that?”

“Psychology,” he said. “You’d make a great therapist.”

“Why do you think that?”

“Cole has spotted your talent for understanding the human condition.” He waved it off. “But if you want to pursue fashion…”

Staring down at Winston, I found he looked as surprised as me.

“Cameron told you that?” I asked.

“No, Mia. I’ve developed an uncanny ability to read minds. Yes, Cameron and I discussed your future.”

“And where was I when this was going on?”

“Apparently on the fast track to laying over my lap and heading for a spanking.”

Winston’s bark brought me back into the room. “First things first,” I said. “We’ll get Mr. Mutt fed then I’ll start plotting how I’m going to take over the world.” I rolled my eyes.

Richard frowned. “Roll your eyes again and we’ll be utilizing the playroom now.”

I hurried off to feed Winston.

My future had yet again taken a 180.

The drive along the Pacific Coast highway in Richard’s open top BMW was a great way to start the day, with the view of the ocean on our right and the sun bursting rays upon it. Other than hitting a little traffic, our journey into Enthrall was uneventful. We stopped off for breakfast and brought it with us.

By mid- afternoon, I’d had the chance to settle back into my desk in the reception, make coffee for everyone, and spend time with ‘the girls,’ Scarlet, Lotte, and Penny. They looked stunning in their dominatrix outfits, and talked enthusiastically about their new clients, and all we’d missed at Enthrall.

Penny’s Scottish accent was as thick as ever and she took delight in showing us photos on her phone of her new niece born just a week ago. Lotte was her usual self, fussing over me, asking me question after question. Her motherly nature made me feel so at home here. Scarlet wanted to hear all the details of my training at Chrysalis. The last she’d seen me had been on Richard’s Malibu beach, and we had so much catching up to do. I told them all that had happened, even sharing how Cameron had used BDSM along with psychology to delve into the truth of my past.

Their eyes had been full of admiration for Cameron, proving once more I wasn’t the only one in awe of him.

When they finally let me return to my desk, I’d stolen a few more minutes to Google psychology courses and took this quiet time to mull over Richard’s statement that I’d make a great therapist.

Had fashion merely been a fad? Had I really found my true calling?

A buzz at my desk made me jump.

“Can you come in here please, Ms. Lauren?” came Richard’s voice on the intercom.

Reaching for my pad and pen, I hurried through the doorway and down to his office.

I took a seat in front of his desk.

He looked up at me. “What are you doing?”

“Taking notes?”

He pushed himself to his feet. “For what?”

I lowered the notepad.

“I have two sessions today. Yours is the first.”

“Two?”

“Yes. I’m assisting Lotte with a session with a new client. Your training needs to resume as quickly as possible.”

“Not tonight?” I said. “In our new playroom?”

“Submit.”

With a nod, I placed the notepad on his desk, along with the pen, and stood with my arms behind my back.

“We discussed the need for your orgasm training,” he said. “You didn’t think I’d forgotten?”

“Well I…” I shook off those words and stood tall.

On the wall to my right, one of those three pictures of Richard’s daredevil stunts had been changed out. The photo was of me. The one he’d taken of us atop the double-decker bus in London. The first one was of him swimming with a great white and the other was him hanging off a sheer rock wall without a harness. It could only symbolize one thing. Richard was hinting he considered me a dangerous pursuit.

“Bend over,” he ordered.

It crossed my mind I too needed a series of photos.

Obediently, I took a step forward and leaned over his desk, staring ahead, wondering if he was going to lock the door. A thrill shuddered up my spine.

Richard came round and hitched up my dress. He eased my panties off and tugged them down my legs. With his help, I stepped out of them.

“Under no circumstances,” he said, “may you come during this session. Afterward, when you leave my office, you will not touch yourself. You are forbidden from any pleasure for the next three days. Do you understand?”

Like Cameron’s denial on the plane…

Don’t think about that now, my mused scolded me. That’s in the past. Richard is your future.

“Yes, sir,” I burst out. “Thank you, sir.”

Richard’s hand came down hard on my butt and made my mouth gape.

He set a deliberate pace, spanking me, his slaps echoing. I tried to settle into the punishment, find my way into subspace, willing myself to go under, deeper into a trance.

He traced his fingers along my sex.

Strong hands rested on my hips and raised my butt higher. My thighs were eased apart, my spine curved elegantly, and those spanks to my ass now lowered to my sex, Richard’s slow steady taps against my clit caused another moan to escape.

His fingers circled, as did my scattered thoughts, concluding if he kept this up any longer I was going to come.

“Permission to speak, sir,” I managed breathlessly.

“Permitted.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“For what?”

“My punishment, sir.” I closed my eyes in response to his flicking fingers.

“Not a punishment. Training.”

I gripped the edge of the desk.

A wave of guilt. A flurry of betrayal; as though an intimate act performed with any man other than Cameron was wrong.

I begged that thought to leave, silently admonishing myself for taking it there.

The tallest tower.

Ice skates scraping upon a frozen surface.

Cameron telling me that pleasing Richard would please him.

Richard dropped to his knees behind me and I jolted when his mouth met my sex, lapping, nipping, his tongue entering. His hands wrapped around my thighs and his fingers played with my clit.

I was so close, dangerously so. “May I come, sir?”

“No,” he said. “I believe I was clear about that.”

Holding the edge, my knuckles white, I tried to pull back on my arousal, but I was already there, climbing higher, exulting at the pleasure he brought between my thighs. His tongue fucked the entrance, owning my sacredness.

I rode out my climax, trying to tame these shaking thighs, trying to hide this orgasm sweeping over me.

“What just happened there?” he said.

“Oh.” I let out a protracted moan.

“Let’s try this again, shall we?” He rose to his feet to stand behind me now. The sound of his zipper preceded the tip of his cock sliding up and down my sex in a tease. A thrust inside stretched me wide and threw me forward.

He took me from behind, hard.

He pulled me up so I was half standing, and twisted me slightly to reach my mouth to kiss me, sharing that sweet taste. His tongue entered my mouth in time with his cock sliding in, and as he took me from behind, his slow, steady pounding drove me into a frenzy.

“You’ve been taking your pills, Mia?” His voice was husky with need.

“Yes, sir.”

His left arm wrapped around my waist and lowered, his fingers finding my clit again to flick me into a state of bliss. His right hand wrapped around my throat in a firm hold of control. “No coming,” he warned. “Understand?”

“Yes, sir.”

This cruel punishment of denial played itself out, with him flicking my clit and fucking me from behind, slow and sure, causing me to pretend I wasn’t coming, despite my body trembling. My tell-tale spasming around his full on thrusts surely gave away my disobedience. This blissful pleasure took hold and carried me with it.

I shuddered, caught up, my body rigid with pleasure.

He slid out and turned me around, his expression fierce.

Trying to keep my eyes on his, I caught that shininess of his cock, needful and yet unfilled.

He gripped my shoulders. “Did you just come?”

Biting my lip, I looked down, strangely ashamed I’d disobeyed.

“I asked you a question.”

“Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.”

He lifted me up onto the desk and pushed me back to lay on it, spreading me before him, hoisting my dress around my waist. Standing between my legs, he eased my thighs farther apart.

He lowered his mouth to my sex. “Obey me this time. Think you can do that, sub?”

“I’ll try.”

His mouth fixed once more on me, and no sooner had my promise been spoken than it had morphed into a lie as pleasure thrummed between my thighs. His tongue explored and savored, cruelly teasing.

“Sir,” I moaned again. “Please.”

“You’re forbidden to come.” His tongue danced on my clit, hurtling me over the edge into yet another orgasm.

My body unable to hide the proof, I trembled violently, and some part of my addled brain sensed this was his way of taking revenge on me for all that had conspired in London.

Richard rose above me and pinned me to the desk and thrust inside me again, grinding out his orgasm until he’d filled me with warmth and his face contorted in bliss.

Stillness surrounded us.

He fell atop me and we hugged, me on the desk, him above, both of us needing this intimacy. Needing to find our way back to the time before.

I’d failed him, failed me, and guilt for the pleasure I’d seemingly stolen brought a wave of angst.

I now stood before him, arms behind my back, my head bowed low, my heart thundering with how he’d react to my failure to obey. He reached for a box of tissues and set about cleaning me down there.

When he was done, he stood in front of me, tall and intimidating. “You do what I say and when. Any further disobedience will be punished.”

My nod gave my understanding.

“Return to me in an hour,” he said.

An hour?

My expression revealed a hint of rebellion.

All it took were his eyebrows to rise defiantly and I scurried out of there, leaving my notebook and pen behind. This climax ban was obviously something I was crappy at. This post orgasm bliss filled me with guilt.

Post fucked. Mind-fucked; I needed chocolate.

Back at my desk, munching on one of Lotte’s home baked cookies, my Googling went from how much a top of the line silver BMW ran for, well over one hundred thousand dollars apparently, to how a girl could control her climax.

The advice was pretty lame. Most of the articles circled around orgasm dysfunction and I had the opposite problem. My body still thrummed from the multiples I’d just had, and my flushed face revealed Enthrall’s secretary had gone a few sexy rounds with her boss. I hoped there’d be a few minutes before I saw anyone so I could return to a nonchalant expression.

How was I ever going to not come with Richard working me into a frenzy like that? My climax ban was destined to go on indefinitely.

The phone buzzed through to let me know someone was at the front door.

I lifted the phone. “Hello? How can I help you?”

“I’m here to see Richard Sheppard,” came a quiet voice.

“May I ask your name?” I said, a little rattled to hear someone say Sheppard. The surname Richard no longer used.

“Hope Oren.”

That sounded familiar.

“Do you have an appointment?”

“I’m a good friend of Richard’s,” she said. “May I come in?”

With a press of a button, I buzzed open the front door of Enthrall.

And finished the rest of my cookie.

The elevator carried her up and I rose to greet her. The doors opened and she stepped out—

My heart wedged in my throat. She looked terrifyingly familiar. An impossible vision of Richard’s ex-fiancé. The stunning woman who he’d lived with in New York. The girlfriend who he’d tried to save after she’d cut her wrists in that bathtub.

And killed herself.

CHAPTER 35

I FOUND MY voice again. “Please, wait here.”

Hope gave a nod she would.

With no memory of making my way down the hallway, I merely found myself standing in front of Richard’s desk. The only explanation was the one I desperately needed to hear. Any other conclusion would render me useless for the rest of my life.

“Does…” I said, nervously.

“Yes, Mia?” said Richard.

“Did Emily have a twin? Your ex?”

Richard rose to his feet. “Please don’t refer to Emily as my ex.”

“Can you answer the question, please.”

He frowned. “Yes, Em had a twin. Why?”

Thank fuck for all the angels.

My hands loosened their grip on my shirt, where I’d balled the material in a daze of confusion.

“Mia?” he snapped.

“She’s in the foyer.”

“Hope’s here?” He nudged past me and ran out.

When I rejoined them in the foyer, they were hugging. Her head rested on his shoulder, and his arms were wrapped around her and were squeezing her into him.

They eventually broke away. Hope was blushing.

“This is Mia,” said Richard. “My secretary.”

That lump in my throat was back.

“Mia, this is Emily’s sister.” He took her hands. “I haven’t seen you since the funeral. What are doing here? How did you find me?”

She looked around her. “Your mom had this down as your work address. This is a broker’s office? The décor’s very chic.”

Richard’s expression changed and he looked self-conscious.

Hope shook her head, as though remembering why she was here. “Wells Worldwide is having a charity dinner in Em’s memory. It’s being held at Shutters in—”

“Santa Monica,” he said. “I know it. We love that charity. Our office here holds a fund raising event each year for Emily’s favorite charity.”

I placed my fists on my hips. Yes, I knew Wells Worldwide, having been auctioned off to Lance Merrill in the organization’s name. I had, by way of Lance, donated a million dollars to the organization.

I too donated big, only the Mia way.

“Usually it’s in New York,” she continued. “But we’ve managed to get Andrea Buckingham to sponsor us.”

“The actress?”

“She’s bringing in millions for us,” she said cheerfully. “Andrea’s been a real boon.”

“Good job, Hope. She’s A-list. How did you wrangle that?”

‘Friends of friends. You know how it goes.”

“What brings you here?”

“I was wondering if you’d like to accompany me to the event tomorrow night? I know it’s short notice.”

“Your family won’t mind?” he said.

“Of course not. Actually, it’s for selfish reasons. My therapist thinks spending some time with you and hearing about Em’s last few days will bring some closure.”

My heart ached for her and my jealousy faded with the realization she’d lost her twin. Her other half. That pain etched on her face was agonizing to witness.

They were hugging again and he was whispering words of comfort, sharing how much he still missed Emily too and not a day went by that he didn’t think of her.

“Can I get you some water?” I offered.

“Hope, come take a seat in my office,” said Richard, breaking away. “Come sit down.”

In a flurry of activity, Hope was escorted into Richard’s office and now sat beside him on his leather couch. She sipped on the glass of mineral water I’d brought her.

From the way Richard stared at her, he too was caught up in memories of Emily--that tilt of his head, that expression of grief he wore when he talked about finding his girlfriend dead.

“Will you go with me?” said Hope. “I know Em would want you to be there.”

“Of course,” he said, smiling at me. “Mia can join us?”

Confusion marred her face. “I’m afraid I only have one spare ticket. I can try to get another… if you like?”

I waved it off. “It’s fine. You should go. It will be good for you.” Though realizing how that sounded, I quickly added, “Sir, you have nothing else on your schedule. You’re free. I mean you’re wide open. Good to go.”

Yes, I think I’d butchered that one nicely enough. I threw in a pleasant smile for good measure.

Richard pulled out his phone. “Leo’s here, Mia.”

“I’m sorry?” I said.

“Bel Air. Your appointment.” He arched a brow, hinting he didn’t want to spell it out.

“Now?” I whispered.

His annoyance forced me out the door.

The chilled morning air hit me, but it was nothing like England. That place had been Antarctic cold. Or was it just the fact I was leaving my boyfriend and the spitting image of his ex-girlfriend to snuggle on that big leather couch in the privacy of his office.

Oh grow up, I chastised myself.

Boyfriends are allowed girlfriends, even the ones that looked exactly like the love of their lives…

Fuckety, fuck, fuck…things really could get worse.

Leo greeted me warmly and wanted to know all about London. With him in the front seat and me in the back of the town car, I tried to sound upbeat as I relayed everything I’d seen and the places I’d visited, missing out all the lewd details he’d no doubt not want to know about. Like that brilliant adventure atop the London Eye with Cameron. That even now made my toes curl.

I tried to concentrate on our conversation, but having seen Richard and Hope together was like a nightmarish blast from the past turning up. Even though I’d never met Emily, I’d seen their photos, and never had a couple looked so perfect together, what with Richard’s high-bred class and her sophistication captured in every picture. Their love for one another was obvious, from the way they were always joined at the hip.

It was impossible not to fear Richard seeing his old flame reflected in her sister, and did Hope feel an overwhelming attraction to Richard? After all, she was a twin and didn’t twins like the same things?

Leo was talking about his time in London. Something about his sister having a house in the west end, something about his love of fish and chips, and something about the beer not being cold enough.

My thoughts chanted this visit back to Chrysalis was going to go just fine, and chances were I’d not bump into Cameron. Yet my heart countered with this need to see him. A yearning to fall into his arms and feign that our friendly hug didn’t morph into the ‘please never let me go ever again,’ kind.

“We’re here,” said Leo.

This French styled château seemed different now. Having lived on the inside for two weeks, I knew the view from its high arched windows. During that time, I’d stolen moments to peer out at the view, knowing my life would never be the same.

“Is Doctor Cole still at work?” I asked.

“He is, yes.”

“Are you picking him up?” I said, trying to guess when he’d be back.

“No,” said Leo. “Dr. Cole’s driving himself today.”

After thanking him for bringing me in, I threw a wave goodbye and entered the great house.

Within minutes I’d settled in the library, and after the pleasantries and vague explanations of why my lessons had been suspended, I’d resumed studying math with Mr. Willington. A youngish and very direct tutor who had an endearing lisp.

Two things I’d not counted on: the first, me remembering anything from my last lesson, and, second, a math exam.

“But I have to get back to work,” I said.

Mr. Welling looked amused. “Dr. Cole told me you’d try and wriggle out of it.”

“How long will it take?”

There was a knock at the door.

I sprang to my feet when Pilar came in carrying a tray with two cups of tea. I almost knocked it out of her hands when I tried to hug her.

She didn’t seem to mind.

As Chrysalis’s housekeeper, she’d been hired because of her laid back nature and ability to turn a blind eye. Having worked here for years, this fifty something Latino had seen it all.

Pilar beamed at me. “We miss you, Ms. Lauren.”

“I miss you too, Pilar.”

She ran her hand over my forehead. “You not sick?”

“No,” I said. “It’s called math.”

Mr. Wellington shook his head. “She has an exam.”

Pilar stared down at it. “I’m glad you’re not sick like Dr. Cole.”

“What’s wrong with him?” I asked.

“Can’t get him to eat.”

“I didn’t know. Is he okay?”

“A little better.” She twisted her mouth. “Math?” She shivered, turned on her heel, and headed out.

Despite my mind drifting to Cameron being sick, I was able to pass the test. I was starting to associate that library with suffering and breathed a sigh of relief when I was out of there.

My feet paused outside Cameron’s office. My hand raised to knock.

Leo was waiting and I really should leave now, but I couldn’t go without checking on Cameron. I had to know he was better and that whatever he had wasn’t serious.

With no answer, I headed on in.

My eyes settled on that large mahogany desk in the center, moved to his vast collection of books shelved on every wall, and shifted quickly to that corner chain where he’d secured me. Over there we’d had the most mind blowing sex I’d ever had; the upside down kind.

These thoughts carried me back to when we’d whiled the hours away in here, sometimes talking, him bringing down a book to show me, or letting me find my own one to read.

I remembered that time I’d served as his secretary and answered his emails while wearing a bejeweled butt plug. On this very desk, he’d taken me from behind on numerous occasions. That beautifully carved desk that symbolized us.

Remembering the drawer he’d gone to when he found that small string of beads, I quickly found them, picked them up, and stared at them fondly in my palm. A souvenir of those times.

“Mia?”

I hid them behind my back.

Cameron looked beautiful, tall, and perfect in the doorway. My heart flittered as though this was the first time I ever saw him.

“I didn’t expect you’d still be here,” he said, as he closed the door and strolled towards me. “What do you have there?”

“Nothing.” Sounded reasonable.

“Show me.”

“Pilar told me you’ve not been well. I wanted to check on you.”

“I’m fine.” He held out his hand. “What are you stealing?”

Head bowed low, I held out my hand and opened my palm to show him. Cameron’s eyelids fluttered and his head tilted in a question. He held out his hand for them.

I placed the beads in his palm and blushed wildly.

“How are you?” he asked.

“Oh fine. Did you know Emily had a twin?”

“Yes, Hope. You didn’t?”

“Not until today when she showed up and scared the crap out of me. I nearly peed myself.”

He looked amused, but it quickly faded. “Turned up?”

“She came to Enthrall. She thinks Richard is still a stockbroker. Hope wants to take him to some charity event tomorrow night.”

“I see.”

She wants to jump his bones, but I didn’t say it.

Using all my strength, I held back on giving Cameron a hug.

“Hello,” I said again.

“Hi.”

Silence wedged itself between us.

Those beads were clutched in his hand and his knuckles were white with tension.

“Sorry.” I pointed to them.

He shook his head, as though coming out of a trance.

“I shouldn’t have taken them.”

“I’ll throw them away.”

“Don’t.” I blushed again. “I mean, okay.”

Whatever you think is best, as long as you’re not going to use them on somebody else.

“You’re not, are you?” I muttered.

“Not what?”

I swallowed hard. “Not sick?”

“No, Mia, I’m fine. Just busy. The usual. Nothing new.”

“Are you happy?”

He looked surprised. “I am.”

“And things are the same?”

“They are.” He arched a brow. “How are things with you and Richard?”

“Great,” I said. “He’s started this climax ban…”

And I’m not really sure why I’m telling you this. I turned away, mortified.

“How’s it going?” he said.

“I’m not very good at it.” My eyes fixed on those beads.

He scratched his chin. “I’m sure it will be over soon.”

“What will?”

“Your climax ban.”

“Oh, yes, that.” I felt self-conscious, as though all those times we’d been intimate had happened to someone else. “Thank you for letting me continue my studies. Can I do them at Enthrall?”

“You don’t want to study here?”

“Too many memories.”

“Good or bad?”

“Mostly good.”

“Mostly?”

“You know. Having to face my trauma.”

“How do you feel about that?”

“How do you feel about that?” I mirrored.

“Seeing you happy is all I care about.” He raised a hand to correct himself. “My employees are my concern.”

“I should go,” I whispered.

“Yes.”

“Goodbye then.”

“Goodbye, Mia.”

“I’m going to go then.”

“I would walk you out, but I’ve a ton of work.”

With a nod, I hurried past him, made it to the door, and scurried down the longest hallway I’d ever walked.

CHAPTER 36

OH NO.

I was almost out of Chrysalis when I saw Arianna heading right for me. She was not only one of the most seasoned subs, she was Shay’s girlfriend, and even though Arianna and I had braved the lion’s den together and faced off with some scary businessmen, she’d made it quite clear she didn’t like me.

The door was in my sights.

“How was London?” she asked.

“My trip was great,” I said, and gestured I was running late.

I hoped Shay hadn’t relayed to her we’d spent the night together in a hotel. Though nothing happened, a woman’s imagination had a funny way of filling in the blanks. Her numerous tattoos were proof she didn’t fuck around. She really had nothing to worry about as she was ridiculously pretty, but something told me before finding Chrysalis, life had been hard on her and this was the reason for her trust issues.

“So you and Shay spent Christmas together?” she said.

“Cameron and Richard too,” I said. “Sorry you didn’t get to see Shay Christmas day, but apparently you guys are spending New Year together?”

She looked defensive.

“He talked about you a lot,” I said. “I know you guys are close.”

“So you’re back with your old master?”

“Yes.” I made it sound upbeat. “All back to normal.”

She turned around and glanced down the hallway. “Is the director in?”

“Cameron, yes?”

“Master Cole.”

“He has lots of paperwork to catch up on.”

“So what did you guys get up to?”

“We visited the London Tower, and the London Eye, and did a bit of shopping.”

“Heard you got to check out Oberon Grove?”

The place I wasn’t meant to talk about.

She shrugged. “Are you doing anything right now?”

“I’m heading back to Enthrall.”

“Wanna have a drink?”

“I can’t. I’m sorry.”

“Only it’s my birthday and I’ve no one else to celebrate it with.”

“Happy Birthday, Arianna. Is Shay taking you out?”

“If he remembers.”

Having a drink with her would ease this tension between us, and after the harrowing day I’d had with that exam, not to mention Hope turning up out of nowhere, I deserved a little treat. Still, work was waiting.

“Richard’s expecting me back,” I said.

Disappointment settled on her face. “We don’t need to go anywhere. They have a bar here. No one’s in there. Just one drink?”

“I think Leo might be waiting.” I gave a wave and hurried outside.

Arianna joined me on the front steps and we both scanned the horizon. Leo wasn’t here yet and there was no sign of a town car approaching.

“Looks like you have time for one drink,” she said mischievously.

“Okay. Let’s go toast your birthday.”

She squealed with delight and sounded so cute, as though her tough demeanor had slipped a little.

We made our way into the lounge. Arianna seemed to know her way around the bar and within a couple of minutes had poured us two shots of tequila. She joined me on the other side and we settled on barstools.

“Cheers,” she said, raising her glass and tapping it to mine.

“Cheers. Happy birthday, birthday girl,” I said, knocking my drink back.

The warmth of the liquor caused a wave of headiness.

I beamed at her. “Oh God, Arianna, you have no idea how much I needed this.”

“Me too.” She jumped off the barstool, rounded the bar, and poured two more shots. She pushed mine towards me.

“I have to go back to work.” I nudged away the glass.

“You’re not driving.”

“No, but Richard’s expecting me back.”

“Tell him your meeting went over.”

Breaking her gaze, I knew she had no idea about my lessons. Cameron had promised me this private schooling would be our secret, other than Dominic knowing about it. I was reassured it would remain that way.

I hated math, but Cameron had refused to take it off the table, forcing me to endure this suffering during each lesson. And Richard hadn’t exactly handled reuniting with Hope in a painless way for me. He hadn’t even introduced me as his girlfriend, for goodness sake. Which was kind of odd.

I reached for the shot glass and toasted Arianna then threw it back. Smacking my lips together, I sucked off this bitterness. Lightheadedness made me woozy.

Our conversation flowed with the booze, and as I relaxed a little more and listened to Arianna I was amazed at how smart she was. She told me she had a degree in chemistry, and I was tempted to ask her to help me with my math. She went on to share how she’d gotten into BDSM after surviving a troubled marriage, and how Shay had been the one to help her learn to trust men again.

I was heartbroken to hear she’d suffered abuse at the hands of her ex-husband, but reassured she’d come out of the experience stronger.

She showed me the tattoo she’d gotten to mark her breakthrough. It was of a flame and it lapped over her shoulder. A few therapy sessions later with Cameron, which she reassured me hadn’t included any intimacy, and she felt whole again.

By my third shot of tequila, you’d have thought we were sisters. We were laughing so much, tears streaming, and both of us swung precariously atop these barstools.

A scream came out of nowhere.

Opening my eyes, I realized it had come from Arianna. She was bent over clutching her stomach and laughing hysterically.

My ass was on the floor.

Apparently that barstool had given out and gravity had secured my butt firmly on the floor. I couldn’t stop laughing either. This was ridiculous and I was ridiculous, and the more I thought about this place and everyone wandering around dressed in leather and oh so serious, the more I laughed.

“Oh shit,” snapped Arianna.

I peered up to see her worried expression.

“What’s up?” I slurred.

“Hello, sir,” she said.

Rubbing my eyes, I tried to focus on what she was looking at—

Cameron stood a few feet away and was looking particularly fierce. Beside him stood Shay, and he seemed just as surprised to see us.

“What the fuck, Arianna?” said Shay.

Cameron came into view as he knelt before me and proceeded to oscillate.

“This is not what it looks like,” I said, and burst out laughing at that.

“Got a call from Richard,” said Cameron sternly. “He’s wondering where his secretary is.”

“We ran into a technical error,” I said.

Arianna burst into laughter again, unable to control her hysteria.

“We’re celebrating her birthday.” I raised a finger to Shay. “You have to take her out to dinner. Spoil her.”

“Not like this I’m not,” he said.

“Well done, Mia,” said Cameron. “If your intention was to sabotage Arianna’s birthday, you succeeded.”

“No,” I said. “Tell them. Tell them you invited me in here.”

This was the same girl that Dominic had warned me about. The girl who’d scorned me while I’d undergone my training. The same person who scared Pilar, and she was as worldly as it got. The same girl who’d hated me before today.

“Arianna?” I said nervously.

She looked down at me with sympathy. “Don’t be angry with Mia. This was my idea.”

I wanted to hug her, so I tried to get up. Only that didn’t go so well and I fell flat on my ass again. Shay grabbed Arianna’s hand and led her out of the bar.

My drinking buddy was gone.

I pointed at Cameron. “You’re so beautiful. Has anyone ever told you that? I miss you so much. It’s like someone scooped out my heart and gave it to you.”

“Here.” A bottle of water appeared before me.

“Like magic,” I said, taking a sip.

“And for my next trick, I’m getting you out of here.”

“I’ve figured it out mister.”

“Figured what out?”

“Why you won’t let yourself love me.”

“Please don’t.”

“No, you need to hear this,” I said. “If not for personal growth reasons.”

“Can you stand? Let me help you.”

I reached out and held his hand. “I’m your punishment. Me. That’s right. You not letting yourself have me is your way of putting yourself through hell. You believe you deserve this pain.”

Cameron pulled me to my feet and wrapped his arm around me. “I’m taking you home. Try to use your legs.”

“Is my body still yours?” I said. “I can’t remember.”

“Oh, Mia.”

“I know more than you think,” I said. “You left me alone with your books too long.”

“Apparently.”

“You taught me the secret language of the heart.”

“Ah.”

“I see everything.”

“Don’t doubt it.”

“Everyone underestimates me. I’m going to prove you all wrong.”

“It was never about that.”

“Can you get Leo to take me back to Enthrall?”

“I’m taking you home.”

“Beverly Hills?”

“Malibu.”

“She’s back from the dead,” I said. “Well, she might as well be.”

“No more talking until you’ve sobered up. Something tells me you’re going to regret this. If not for how your head’s going to feel tomorrow.”

“I want to turn it back.”

Cameron swept me up into his arms and carried me through the foyer. “Turn what back, sweetheart?”

“Time.”

Outside came the blur of a car.

The soft scent of leather filled my nose as he eased me into the back of his BMW. He pulled the seatbelt around me. My eyes closed and I let out a sigh of satisfaction. Being this close to him again was all I needed to feel safe.

I opened one eye and gave him a toothy grin.

Cameron kissed my forehead.

And then he was gone.

He climbed into the driver’s seat and turned on the engine. “You okay back there?”

“Did you ever love me?” I said wistfully. “I mean, was there ever a second when you felt the same way about me?” I caught his gaze in the rearview. “You wouldn’t tell me even if you did, would you?”

The rev of the engine, the jolt of the car.

Swiftly we left Chrysalis behind.

CHAPTER 37

“YOU HAVE GOT to be fucking kidding me?” snapped Richard.

I blinked toward the bedroom doorway and cringed.

“You tell him,” I whispered to Cameron.

Cameron sat beside me on the bed and was attempting to get me to drink yet another glass of water.

“Mia, I was waiting for you back at Enthrall,” said Richard. “Please tell me you didn’t get another tattoo?”

“Why would I get another one?” I said.

“Because I know you. This is you acting out.”

“It’s Arianna’s birthday.” I glanced at Cameron for his support. “She begged me to have a drink with her.”

Cameron was uncharacteristically quiet. I was so used to seeing him rule the room, yet he merely sat there frowning.

Richard stomped closer. “So what happened to your lesson at Chrysalis?”

“I did it. And had an exam too. I was on the way out—”

“Mia, there’s nothing to be jealous of,” said Richard. “Hope is Em’s sister, and she’s been through a terrible ordeal. This is my way of making it up to her family, who have refused to speak to me since the funeral. You can only imagine how that feels. As if losing Emily wasn’t enough.”

“I didn’t mean—”

“No,” he snapped. “You will listen to me. The world doesn’t revolve around you. You have responsibilities. You were needed back at Enthrall.”

“I’m so sorry. Really.”

“If this is your way of getting Cameron to train you some—”

My gaze snapped to Cameron.

“I think there’s been a misunderstanding,” said Cameron.

“I don’t think so,” said Richard. “The evidence is drunk in my bed.”

“Our bed,” I said.

“If you’ll excuse me, I have to go and explain to Hope why my girlfriend is pissed in the middle of the day. Have you any idea how that reflects on me?”

“So she knows I’m your girlfriend now?” I said, and then realized. “She’s here?”

“Yes, Mia,” said Richard. “She was going to stay in a hotel. I told her that’s ridiculous when she can stay here. She’s in town for a few days—”

“Shouldn’t you have asked me first?”

“Asked what?”

“If I’m okay with your ex’s sister, who just so happens to look like her, staying here?”

“Oh for God’s sake, Mia,” said Richard. “She lost her sister. My father decimated her life too and I have to live with that.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” I said, tugging on Cameron’s sleeve. “Tell him.”

Cameron went to speak and seemed to think better of it.

Richard shook his head. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go make up the spare bedroom for Em.”

I swallowed hard.

Cameron caressed his brow. “I think you misspoke, buddy.”

“No I didn’t,” said Richard.

“I’m afraid you did,” said Cameron softly.

Pressing my fingertips to my lips, I tried to suppress a sob. “I just wished you’d told me Emily had a twin.”

“Have you any idea of the burden I carry every day?” said Richard, his expression worsening.

“It was just one drink,” I said. “Okay, it was three, but I promise you I had no idea everything was going to blow up. Had I known—”

“My father not only ruined their lives, he ruined countless others. Every day I try to find a way to console myself. Hope turning up is good for me. This is her way of healing and, you know what, it is for me too.”

“Doesn’t having someone who looks just like Emily around remind you of her?” I asked. “Make you wish you were back with her again?”

“You don’t get it, Mia,” said Richard. “And, you know what, I don’t expect you too. You’re naive, and the only way you’re surviving life right now is because you’ve been graced with knowing us.”

“Richard,” said Cameron, pushing himself to his feet. “Seeing Hope has triggered old anxieties. Let’s keep a cool head and proceed—”

“Cole, make yourself useful,” said Richard, pointing at me. “And get through to her that she either starts thinking of other people or she’s out.”

He’d made it sound like I was on a fricken game show, and if it wasn’t for knowing just how much pain Richard was going through I’d have yelled back at him. Instead, I merely sipped water, trying to find that elusive Zen that the picture of a temple that hung above the bed taunted me with.

Richard stormed out.

“Well, that seemed to go well,” I said, taking another sip of water.

Cameron suppressed a chuckle.

“Where’s my wing dog, Winston?” I said. “He’s the only sane one around here.”

“You going to be okay?” asked Cameron.

“Just fine,” I said. “This is why I’m here.”

Cameron blinked at me under dark lashes. He rose from the bed.

With a wave goodbye, he left the room. I congratulated myself on blowing that moment up too.

I was on a roll.

CHAPTER 38

I HAD NO other choice but to support Richard’s belief that having Hope stay with us was a good idea. He’d convinced me this was healing for both of them and I wasn’t going to stand in their way.

Hope and I had gotten to know each other a little and I could see her attraction. Hope was pretty, sweet, and ridiculously intelligent, having qualified as an architect and currently designing some building for a bank. Just like her sister, Hope too had New York at her feet.

She was quite the vision standing in our living room, dressed in a slinky black evening gown and strappy high heels and almost matching Richard’s dashing height. He’d dressed in a tux and looked extra gorgeous tonight. Just to rub it in.

Panic had found a new home.

Both of them sipped aperitifs, making me feel like a third wheel as they’d readied to head out to Shutters on The Beach. The charity event promised to be quite something, with a red carpet and L.A.’s royalty attending.

Sans Mia.

Perhaps, I wondered, there really was no other ticket hanging around, or perhaps they just didn’t want me there.

Richard had ordered in sushi especially for me. It would go uneaten.

I was too full of jealousy.

I’d stepped into one of Richard’s old photos of him and Emily. As though karma had come back around and I was its victim this time. Richard didn’t seem to catch the way Hope looked at him, which was all doe eyed and full of admiration. He was too distracted to notice me. Perhaps it was Hope’s questions that had thrown him. Like why a stockbroker’s office was called Enthrall? Or how come he was dating his secretary? She didn’t need to say that she was surprised by his downgrade. After all, Richard had gone from dating Emily, a well known socialite, to me.

I was somewhere between wanting Richard to be happy and wondering if there was any chance we’d survive his past.

Emily was haunting me in new and original ways.

I offered them another drink and they both declined.

With a subtle glance, I managed to get Richard away from Hope so I could talk to him in private.

“What time do you think you’ll be home?” I asked casually.

Richard shrugged. “You’re not jealous are you, Mia?”

“Haven’t I been a good hostess?”

“Stop looking at her so warily.”

Well, I reasoned, it was hard to settle when it felt like his old flame was haunting the house.

Richard grabbed me by the shoulders. “Mia, I love you. You. And not so long ago I had to endure you being fucked by my best friend. Imagine how that made me feel?”

“You gave me to him.”

“Can we please not go round in circles on this? You know I did it for you.”

“Are you taking it out on me now?”

He looked fierce. “Let’s review the facts. Hope turned up unexpectedly. She was my fiancé’s sister. The woman I was going to marry. Hope is considered family, Mia.” He stepped forward and kissed my forehead.

Like Cameron had kissed me yesterday in the back of his car, but this felt different. It was as though the affection behind it was forced.

It seemed that Richard was still angry with me for yesterday’s lapse in judgment.

“I was trying to bond with Arianna,” I told him.

“There are other ways.”

“You’ve forgiven me then?”

“It’s not like I never get drunk. Just promise me you’ll never drive in that state.”

“No, of course.”

He gestured he needed to get back to Hope.

They had an evening of revelry to be getting on with.

It was hard to see them walk out the door together, and from Winston’s expression he looked equally spooked. He panted heavily.

I knelt to give his chin a scratch and he licked my hand.

“Come on, buddy,” I said. “Looks like it’s just us tonight.”

He seemed to do better after I fed him a snack.

Sitting at the kitchen table and staring down at this writing paper, I knew I needed to make up for the damage I’d been wielding lately. I spoke from the heart, writing a letter to Richard’s father in hope he’d understand the importance of the words. So far I’d had no response from the other two secret letters I’d sent. This was yet another attempt to reach him, to get Richard’s dad to see how much good he could do if he really found a place in his heart for his son.

Richard’s source of pain always came back to his dad.

I had been selfish over the last few weeks, mainly with being too caught up in healing myself. Without a word to my best friend, until I’d landed in the city, I’d even run off to London. I had some making up to do on several fronts.

I had used a thesaurus to fancy this letter up and hopefully get through to the man who’d once been considered a financial genius, according to the New York Times.

After putting a stamp on the envelope, I used Google to get the address of his current residence, which apparently was a North Carolina prison.

Richard needed an apology from his dad and I prayed I’d managed to convey that as tactfully as possible. Surely after all this time in prison, Mr. Sheppard had come round to see the pain he’d caused his family and would want to put it right?

I tucked the letter into my handbag.

Sliding the living room glass door open, I stepped out into the garden and breathed in the balmy sea air. I loved it out here and reassured myself within a few days everything would be back to normal. Winston followed me out and settled near a lounger, as though he knew I needed company.

The evening was cool and that sparkling pool was calling. I stripped off my jeans and sweater, extracted myself from my underwear, and dived in.

The water was warm and it looked so pretty beneath soft yellow lights. Floating felt wonderful.

Swimming at night was a luxury I’d only ever dreamed about. This was something I’d never take for granted, and as I swam lap after lap, I reminded myself to be grateful for all my blessings. My cup really was half full.

Taking a breather, with my arms stretched out on either side of the pool, I stared up at the night sky, happy to see the clouds had shifted to reveal the stars.

I loved this garden.

My mind went there, taking me to some hall where Hope and Richard slow danced their way beneath a romantic glass ball circling above, showering them with twinkling lights. A truly romantic setting.

How could you do this to me?

Richard’s words about how selfish I’d become served as a punishment.

Movement caught my eye.

My breath stilted.

A young blonde woman was staring through the glass windows in the living room, and she was between me and the phone. I was naked and defenseless.

Winston growled.

She turned around and saw me.

“Jasmine?” I called out, relieved I knew her. “What are you doing here?”

“Mia.” She ran towards me, her face flushed, her eyes red.

She was tall and blonde and pretty. She looked younger than her thirty years, and her Irish complexion was flawless. Cameron had flown me up to Big Bear to meet her after I’d caught Richard and her strolling arm in arm into Pendulum and assumed the worst. The trip had been to reassure me there was nothing going on between them. Was this a sign from the universe I had nothing to worry about? It had to be. What other explanation was there?

I swam towards her. “What are you doing here? Are you okay?”

Jasmine knelt by the pool edge. “Is Richard here? I have to speak with him,” her accent was extra thick, her cocky demeanor gone.

“Why? What’s wrong?”

She let out a sob. “They found those naked photos of me on Willem’s phone.”

“What photos? Who’s Willem?”

“My master. The press hacked his phone. He might have to resign. He’s refusing to talk to me. Won’t take my calls. Willem told me it’s useless going to London. He won’t see me. ”

“You haven’t done anything wrong,” I said. “Surely the police will arrest whoever stole those photos?”

“He’s married.”

“He’s a politician?” I vaguely remembered her mentioning him and assumed that was why they were so interested in his private life.

“Mia,” she whispered self-consciously. “He’s the leader of the opposition.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I don’t know what that means?”

“He was in the running for prime minister,” she said. “Now it’ll never happen.”

“As in president?” I stupidly asked.

“What the hell am I going to do? My tits are all over the papers?”

Chaos ensued, with Winston barking and me scrambling to get out of the pool and dripping water everywhere. Jasmine scanned the garden, as though paranoid we were being filmed, and I prayed my tits weren’t destined for the British tabloids too.

I grabbed my towel hanging off a lounger and we headed on in, making our way to the office.

“I’ll call Richard,” I said. “He’ll know what to do.”

My call went straight to voicemail. My mind leaned toward what Hope and him were up to, and I feared they’d book themselves a room. I could always phone the reception at Shutters. Though if Richard found out, he’d be furious.

These thoughts hurt like hell and I needed to get my mind off them. Richard had always needed me to trust him and this situation gave me the chance to shine and play the good girlfriend. And from the way Jasmine was shaking, she really needed me right now.

She strolled around to the other side of Richard’s desk and gave the mouse a shake to awaken the screen. Within a few seconds, she’d Googled her lover and we were both staring at front page news of Willem’s fraught expression caught on camera, another of Jasmine posing naked. More disturbing still was the one of Willem’s wife looking harassed, and I felt sorry for the woman who’d apparently been destined to live at number 10 Downing Street, the home of the British prime minster, having had that aspiration snatched from her debutante hands.

During my trip to London, Cameron had filled me in a little on the differences between the conservative and liberals, though I’d never suspected the information would come in handy so soon. Or that Willem, whose political theories Cameron admired and mentioned in passing, was the same man fucking Jasmine.

“Please don’t mind me asking this,” I said. “But what are you expecting Richard to do exactly?”

“It’s the protocol,” she said. “You don’t know that?”

“Protocol?”

“Yes, when anything like this happens, we contact the assistant director and he does his thing. You know, sets Shay into action. Try Cameron.”

His phone went to voicemail, so I tried Shay. With no reply from either of them, I texted Arianna.

Mia: “Hi Arianna. I’m looking for Cameron. Can you ask Shay if he knows where he is?”

Arianna: “Hey girl. Shay’s over at Master Cole’s. Cameron wanted to blow off some steam apparently. They were going to fence.”

Just the thought of it made my toes curl. That, along with having an excuse to see Cameron again.

Mia: “How was your birthday?”

Arianna: “Shay took me on a surprise cruise. LOL. Luckily the tequila had worn off by then.”

Mia: “Glad you had fun. See you soon.”

Arianna: “You too, baby girl.”

Staring at my phone, I marveled at the transformation in our relationship.

“What did she say?” asked Jasmine.

“Shay’s at Cameron’s. He lives in Beverly Hills.”

“Can we go?”

“Yes, I’m sure they’ll understand.”

She narrowed her gaze. “You have a real crush on that guy, don’t you?”

I tried to look nonchalant and probably failed.  “I’ll leave a note for Richard.”

This visit would also give me the chance to drive that BMW Cameron had bought me for Christmas, and drop it off at his place. I knew Richard would welcome that decision and I hoped it would earn me some points.

After tucking Winston into bed and topping up his water bowl, Jasmine and I set out for the Pacific Coast highway.

I decided not to tell her the car we were driving in had been gifted by Cameron. Instead I chose to talk about other stuff, like how she came to be living in California, and how she’d met Willem.

Jasmine shared how she’d come to the States to get into acting. Having modeled for a few years, she wanted to try something different. A few auditions later and she’d started to get call backs.

“You don’t want to act?” she asked.

“No.” I glanced her way. “My step mom’s an actress, but we don’t really speak any more.”

“Why?”

“Long story.”

She gestured to the road that we still had a ways to go.

“My dad pretended he’d been killed in a motorbike accident,” I said. “And disappeared off the face of the earth. She knew he was alive. Didn’t tell me.”

“Fucking hell.”

“Don’t like to talk about it to be honest,” I said. “Cameron’s helping me work through a lot of crap.”

“When you flew up to my house that time, I could see the chemistry between you both.”

“Well, he was my master then,” I said. “Which explains it.”

“He had this kind of extra sparkle,” she said wistfully. “Usually Cole’s just this stern guy strolling around Chrysalis with everyone bowing down to him and the subs tripping over themselves to get trained by him.” She shook her head. “You must be pretty special.”

“Why do you say that?”

“You’re allowed to visit his house.”

“Well this is an emergency.”

“Mia, he’s Cameron Cole.”

I threw her a glance, trying to understand her meaning.

“He’s the ultimate prize, mate. Everyone’s dream guy.”

“He’s a little scary,” I said. “I know that.”

“So sad it didn’t work out between you.”

“Well, I’m Richard’s. And I’m very happy about that.”

“Where is he?”

“Out with a friend at a charity event.”

“Which one?”

“Wells in Africa. There’s a red carpet event at Shutters on the Beach and celebs are going to be supporting it.”

“Why aren’t you going?”

“It’s his ex’s favorite charity.” I swallowed hard. “His fiancé died.”

“Poor bastard.”

“He’s taking his ex’s sister to the event,” I said. “Thinks it might be good for them both.”

“You don’t mind?”

“I think it will be good for them both too.”

“But?”

“How do you mean?”

“You don’t sound too sure.”

“Hope’s her twin.”

“Well, fuck me.”

“It’s a little worrying.”

She turned in her seat. “Why didn’t you go?”

“They didn’t have another ticket.”

“Sounds like that girl’s after your man.”

“Please, don’t make it any harder.”

“Let’s go get us some Cole and Gardner action,” she said. “That would be one hell of a way to get revenge.”

“There’s nothing to get revenge for,” I said. “Richard’s not done anything wrong.”

“Not yet.”

She might as well have punched my stomach.

With me trying to pretend there wasn’t a rock lodged in my throat, we drove the rest of the way talking about other stuff, like how pretty the palm trees were and how big and impressive the houses looked.

Cameron’s was no exception.

Just like me when I’d first visited here, Jasmine looked around Cameron’s foyer in awe.

She smirked when she saw the chandelier. “That kind of looks like a…”

“Yes,” I said. “It does, doesn’t it.” Admiring the crystal droplets shaped elegantly in a V, I guided her on. “I think they’ll be in the gym.”

I led her down a long hallway and her eyes popped as she took in the paintings hanging on either side.

“Do you think these are originals?” she said.

“They are.”

“His security better improve,” she said. “We walked right in here.”

“He has cameras.”

“Still, I could grab this one here and bolt out the door with it.”

“Yeah, I’d like to see you try it. Cameron has Shay in charge of his security. Your ass would probably be tasered.”

“I once had my clit tasered.”

“You’re joking?”

No, she wasn’t.

Jasmine was one fucked up girl, but I liked her. Her sassy Irish mischief was a welcome change from all this testosterone fueled dominance.

Metal striking metal could only mean one thing, and my heart skipped a beat at the thought of seeing Cameron dressed in that white fencing suit.

A clash of swords, shoes skidding and squeaking along a hardwood floor, this vibration beneath my feet from their thundering attack.

They fought like enemies.

Florescent lighting shone down on two men engaged in a fierce contest, their faces concealed behind meshed masks, their body’s clad in an all white protective layering, and the only way to distinguish the difference between them were those few inches of height Cameron had on Shay.

They looked super sexy lunging, leaping backwards and forwards. Their swiftness was startling, along with that fast slide of their feet.
Swords sliced through the air before they struck their opponent’s weapon.

Cameron avoided the saber coming for him.

His masked face turned towards us and he flinched backwards.

Shay pulled off his mask and glared at us. “Jasmine?” he said, perspiration dripping off his forehead.

She stepped forwards. “I’m here because—”

“You don’t just turn up uninvited,” snapped Shay, as he strolled over to us. He pointed at me. “That goes for you too.”

“It’s an emergency,” I said, feeling a little wounded. “There’s this big scandal that’s broken in London. We need your help.”

“We’re on it,” said Cameron, his mask now off, his black locks sticking up, sweat spotting his brow. He removed his gloves and smoothed his hair down.

This was the hardest thing of all. Seeing him act nonchalant around me, as though those final days of training hadn’t ended here in his house with us making love in every room and every conceivable position. At the end of each night, we’d curled up in each other’s arms and slept soundly.

He’d let his guard down then, but from the way he glared at me it made me doubt my memories.

“Willem’s in trouble,” I said.

“Mia, this is not your concern,” said Shay. “We’re handling it.”

Jasmine balled her hands into fists. “How? How are you handling it? It’s all over the news. The cat’s out the bag.”

“Cat’s back in the bag,” said Shay, strolling over to the wall.

He picked up two bottles of water and handed one to Cameron. They screwed off the tops and both took a sip. From the way Shay chugged his down, fencing was thirsty work.

“We have an inside man at the newspaper,” said Cameron. “He’s following our usual protocol. This will be over tomorrow.”

“It’s front page news,” I said.

Cameron stormed towards me and grabbed my arm. He led me out of the gym.

A few feet down the hallway, he let go.

“Never speak of this issue again,” he said. “Understand?”

“But—”

“It’s being dealt with. We have the funds to make it go away. That’s all you need to know.”

“Why are you being like this with me?”

“Like what?”

“Mean.”

“Mia, I’ve just spent the last hour dodging Shay’s saber. I’m not angry with you.”

“You’re a little shouty.”

He rolled his eyes. “You should have called.”

“I did. You didn’t pick up.”

“Don’t tend to take calls while a blade is being shoved at me. Call me old fashioned.”

“I’ve brought your car back.”

He looked exasperated. “Then how are you getting home?”

Oh, hadn’t thought of that.

“Jasmine came to the house to talk with Richard,” I explained. “Only he’s out with Hope at that charity event.”

He gave a nod he knew about it.

Cameron looked so beautiful standing there in his white fencing suit, perspiration dripping off his brow, proving they’d been going hard at it.

Not so unlike the going hard at it Cameron and I had done in-between these two paintings he was having me stand between. A rush of blood preceded a wave of lightheadedness.

My back hit the wall as he moved in and closed the gap between us. His hand reached out and pressed on my chest to pin me there, his head dipping low, his mouth nearing my lips.

I couldn’t refuse his kiss. Cameron’s hold on me remained too fierce. An ironclad grip on my heart.

He shook his head, as though rising from a trance. “Willem’s issue is being resolved.” He moved back sharply.

“So it’s going to be okay?” My gaze drifted to his lips. “Jasmine will be fine?”

“Yes.” He turned away from me. “Now get the fuck out of my house.”

He walked back into the gym.

CHAPTER 39

LEANING AGAINST the wall I, sucked in steadying breaths.

The painting before me mirrored this moment. I shared the same expression as the terrified angel being chased by a winged devil.

Another angel hid behind a tree, watching this horrifying ordeal unfold. She too was naked and hugging a tree, as though it alone could save her. A while back, Cameron had told me the artist who’d painted it had been persecuted because this was the work of a woman. A travesty during the time when misogynists ruled the land.

Yet Cameron loved this painting. He’d admired the artist’s skill. To him, this painting represented a woman’s fear of losing her virginity. As though it reflected her worth, lessened with the loss of innocence, yet as Cameron had so succinctly stated, it was worldly women who were most likely to influence society for the better.

Cameron had taught me to read art. And people too. So it was no wonder I could now read him.

My thoughts ran back to London and that playroom, and I remembered the day Richard had turned up to claim me.

In that room had come Cameron’s dark monologue about why we couldn’t be together. It wasn’t that he didn’t want me, but rather his actions had set in motion my relationship with a man who did. That us being together was impossible. That Richard had been through too much.

I’d accepted my fate, but in doing so I now had to endure Cameron’s heartbreak. Richard really did need me, even if he made strange decisions like taking Hope to that charity event.

There was only one way to deal with this.

Tell Cameron I had no feelings for him and let him move on. Just minutes ago, I’d read distress in his eyes. I couldn’t live with myself knowing he was destined to roam these endless hallways alone.

I nudged open the door and went back in.

Jasmine sat tucked against the wall and she was quite happily watching Shay and Cameron chat across the room, as though being in their presence was all she needed.

Cameron threw me a wary glance as he pulled on his gloves. Shay was whispering something to him and it was impossible to hear it from here.

I strolled closer, head high, ready to say my bit.

Cameron pulled down his mask to cover his face, as did Shay, and I was left standing there feeling awkward.

Shay turned his body in a fencing pose. “You might want to step back, Mia.”

“Just need a word with Cameron.” I folded my arms. “Master Cole.” The words rolled off my lips with sarcasm.

“I believe there’s nothing more to say,” came Cameron’s muffled reply.

“I never loved you,” I said. “Just so we’re clear.”

Cameron’s sword dropped to his side.

The squeak of a shoe came as Shay repositioned his pose.

Cameron, I didn’t mean it.

I’ve always loved you.

From the moment I laid eyes on you in Enthrall, and every second of every minute of every hour of every day, I think of you. You are everything to me and I can’t imagine life without you.

But I couldn’t say it.

Couldn’t take back my words.

“On guard,” shouted Cameron, as he turned towards Shay and lunged at him powerfully, his saber striking Shay’s chest and bending.

I stepped back, full of regret.

Jasmine waved me over.

Realizing I’d missed my chance, I knew there was nothing to do but wait. I needed to tell Cameron that dismissing me like that had addled my brain, bruised my heart, and sent me reeling.

Reeling still, I lowered myself to the ground and sat beside Jasmine and watched Shay and Cameron continue to spar, their fight aggressive.

On and on and on they warred across the gym.

Jasmine stared at them, fascinated. Hugging my knees, my eyes fixed on Cameron’s physique, the way his body moved with masculine control, yet it was graceful. A powerful maneuvering to avoid Shay’s strikes yet land his own right on target.

Time dissolved, bringing with it a sense that winning was everything to both of them. That this was more than a match of skill and wits.

Inside Cameron’s office, I’d found a book on fencing. The one offering more than techniques. I’d plopped down in that large armchair of his and had become engrossed in the theory of why winning was so important. A trait I’d never developed apparently. The reward for the winner would be a chemical rush, an increase in testosterone, a rise in dopamine, and the high improved mood and stature.

Cameron was soothing himself with his favorite sport.

And from the look of things, he was pushing himself as well as Shay, trying to get his all illusive fix.

Gradually there came a slowing in Shay’s steps, a faltering in his maneuvering, a tiring of his arm. Cameron’s swift strategies were winning him the game.

The door slammed to my right.

Richard stormed in and he was still dressed in a tux, his face full of rage, his walk now a run towards one of the spare sabers abandoned near the wall.

I leaped to my feet. “Richard.”

Cameron didn’t see Richard hurtling towards him until he was right on top of him. Richard’s point struck his chest, the blade flexed, coupled with a muffled grunt from Cameron.

I let out a scream and Jasmine clutched me back.

Cameron compensated for the strike, readjusting his stance, reasserting control. This was a man of skill and Richard’s advantage wouldn’t last long.

Shay leaped out of the way of the two friends sparring backwards and forwards. Richard was amazingly good at this. Someone was about to die.

Shay ducked to avoid Richard’s sword when he tried to help.

“You wait until I’m out of the house and then you bring her here?” Richard pointed at me.

“No.” I ran towards them. “I came here with Jasmine.”

“Shut up,” shouted Richard.

Shay yanked off his mask. “They’re here because of Jasmine.”

Richard lunged at Cameron again, thrusting his sword, and it bounced off Cameron’s shoulder.

“At least get a mask on,” said Shay.

Cameron pulled his off, his glare full of fury.

“You’re out maneuvering me,” said Richard. “I can’t play this game any more.”

“There’s no game,” said Cameron. “At least hear the facts.”

Richard dropped his sword. “Mia calls your name out in her sleep.”

This I did not know.

Cameron’s stare found mine. “That means nothing.”

“It means everything,” said Richard.

“I failed,” said Cameron. “I wanted Mia to be my finest work. I’d convinced myself she was. Instead she’s my biggest disappointment.” He gestured to me. “Take her home. I can’t bear to look at her.” He threw his sword down and it echoed a clang.

Casually, and without looking back, Cameron walked from the room.

Shay gestured to Jasmine. “Time to leave.”

Richard spun round, grabbed my arm, and led me out of the gym. We moved along the hallway and out into the night.

He shoved me into the front seat of his jeep. Jasmine climbed into the back. Loud rock music played all the way back to Malibu.

By the time we got home, Hope had gone to bed. A note left on the kitchen counter thanked me for letting Richard take her to the event.

Sipping from a glass of water, sitting beside Winston in the kitchen, I tried to suppress my tears, sucking back the grief of Cameron’s words and the pain they’d brought.

Shaken by the danger both men had faced, I was full of shame over being the cause.

Richard came into the kitchen and knelt before me, his tie hanging loose, his hair ruffled from the drive back. “How are you doing?” he said softly, that kindness back in his eyes.

“Oh fine.” I forced a smile. “Winston needed a top up.”

“Thank you for taking such good care of him,” he said. “He really is my baby.”

I scratched Winston’s chin. “He’s mine too.”

“I just stabbed my best friend with a sword.” He chuckled. “That’s what you do to me. That’s how much I love you.”

“I’m so sorry,” I said. “Please call Cameron. Make things okay between you and him.”

“Already have,” he said. “We’re all good. Cameron’s laughing it off, telling me I could do with some lessons. Shay’s offered to improve my flunge.”

“Your what?”

“A hop and a skip past my opponent.” He arched a brow. “Yeah, not gonna to happen.”

“I didn’t know you could play.”

“Apparently I can’t.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. “Jasmine came here because of that stuff going on with Willem.”

“I know that now. Though it would have been good for that note you left me to have explained that so I didn’t make a complete ass of myself.”

“It was my fault,” I said. “Everyone will know that.”

Richard rose to his feet and held out his hand. “You didn’t know you were living with Errol Flynn, did you?”

“Had no idea,” I said, forcing a smile to hide my terror. “You have quite the moves.”

He pulled me to my feet.

Hand in hand, we wandered into the bedroom.

There, on the ground to the right of our bed, was Jasmine, and she was fast asleep lying on a pallet covered in blankets.

“Why is she in our bedroom?” I whispered.

Richard frowned at me. “Jasmine’s permanently immersed in the scene.”

“But why is she in here?”

“Hope has the other room.”

“How about the living room? The couch?”

“Mia, she’s been through a terrible ordeal tonight. She can’t sleep alone.”

I stared at him in utter astonishment.

Jasmine stirred and rolled over. That blanket covering her nakedness had slipped and revealed her breasts. Her nipples hardened from the sudden chill.

Richard arched a mischievous brow.

No, this wasn’t okay. This was not happening and I wasn’t going to allow it.

“Get ready for bed,” he said. “It’s been a long day.”

“How am I meant to sleep with her in here?” I whispered.

“She’s on my side of the bed.” He strolled over to Jasmine, bent down, and pulled the cover up and over her.

My jaw fell.

Richard rose to his full height and glared at me. “If you don’t want to be lying where she is, with her in the bed instead of you, then I suggest you hurry along.”

CHAPTER 40

IT FELT INCREDIBLE.

A tongue leisurely circled my sex and hair tickled my thighs. That slow, deep thrust of two fingers inside me worked me into a frenzy of shudders. I blinked through this perfect way to wake up.

Mmmm.

I lifted the bedsheet and saw Richard’s head bobbing down there, his muscled forearms taut with the tension of holding his own weight.

“Oh God,” I said, and my head hit the pillow.

I crooked my neck to see if Jasmine was awake, though from this angle it was impossible to see.

I also remembered I was on an orgasm ban and it crossed my mind to let one slip in.

Richard’s kisses found my belly and began their way up. He rose above me, and his mouth met mine, kissing me passionately.

Glancing left became a gesture of concern we weren’t alone. Richard lay by my side and hugged me into him.

This too was a wonderful way to wake up.

Though it was tainted by having a supermodel lying close by.

Putting on my best stony faced attitude, I left the bed and waded into the kitchen to get some water, my legs heavy and my heart heavier.

Morning brought with it all the usual activities of getting ready for work and getting to know our houseguests better over breakfast.

Taking a few minutes out for private contemplation, I headed into the bathroom and stared at my stunned reflection, recalling Cameron’s words last night that I was his biggest disappointment.

Why yes, that it a saber sticking out of your chest, Mia, in case you were wondering.

It was impossible to not take those words to heart, and as the day progressed with Jasmine hanging out with us at home and Enthrall, and Hope choosing to stay “Just one more week,” it was hard to think of anything other than getting through the day without breaking down and embarrassing myself as the jealous girlfriend.

No one was going to see my cry, I promised myself.

After a thorough Google search on Jasmine’s current scandal, I read the British news in astonishment. Willem had been vindicated and apparently those slutty photos of Jasmine had been put on his phone by a famous hacker who’d somehow wrangled his way out on bail. The issue really was resolved. Willem’s political career was back on track, and as he’d dealt with the entire spectacle with grace, he was England’s new blue eyed boy. As was his wife.

Jasmine was being compensated, but apparently I wasn’t meant to know that. She’d whispered it to me in a corner of Enthrall, telling me another master was being sought out for her. For Jasmine’s sake, I hoped it wasn’t Senator Deluca.

That afternoon, I’d attended an English class at Chrysalis, and then later I’d snuck into Cameron’s office.

I quickly scribbled a note on Chrysalis embossed paper that I’d found on his desk. I wanted him to know I still cared very much for him, and though I hadn’t quite proven myself a perfect submissive as yet, I promised to make him proud.

It brought a sense of peace.

I left the note on his desk.

A book on the shelf caught my eye and I pulled it down. Cameron had the entire collection of Joseph Campbell’s works and had even gifted me one about goddesses here in this very house, when he’d kept me prisoner. All I could think of during that time was getting out of that dungeon he’d imprisoned me in. Now all I could think of was finding my way back into it.

“You’re still here?” said Cameron.

I dropped the book and stepped back, having not heard him enter and with no idea how long he’d been standing there.

“I left you a note.” I pointed to it.

He came closer.

I handed it to him. “You can read it if you like.”

He peered down at the scribbled envelope addressed to him.

I swallowed hard. “I didn’t mean what I told you at your house.”

I do still love you.

I stared up at him, into those dreamy chestnut eyes.

“How are things at home?” he asked.

“Fine. Hope’s still there. She’s staying a few more days before she goes back to New York.”

“Sounds like Richard’s getting some resolution?”

“Yes, both he and Hope have been talking a lot about Emily.”

“When someone leaves an indelible mark on our lives, this is how we honor them, by talking about them fondly.”

“I’ve gotten to know more about Emily,” I said. “I know I’d have liked her.”

“She’d have loved you too, Mia. Though had she not died…”

Why thank you, Captain Obvious.

“Cameron.”

“Yes.”

Pressing my fingertips to my lips, I tried to find the words to tell him how much I missed him, couldn’t live without him.

“Well I really should be getting on,” he said.

“Yes.”

He gestured to the door.

“I miss you so much,” I blurted.

“Mia.” Cameron measured his words. “I’ve taken on a new submissive.”

Terror had me by the throat.

He glanced at his watch. “In fact she’s tied to a Saint Andrew’s Cross as we speak and awaiting my presence.”

“Same dungeon?” I asked faintly.

“Same.”

My lungs stopped working.

My mouth formed words but failed to speak them.

“It’s for the best,” he said softly.

“Well that’s good,” I said, nodding unconvincingly.

“So if you’ll excuse me.”

I picked up the book. “I’ll put this back.”

He looked tired and drawn, sad even.

“Have a lovely day,” I said.

“The day’s almost over, Mia.” He’d made it sound ominous.

He turned on his heels, and with his hands tucked into his pockets he headed out.

I hugged the book to my chest.

Halfway down the hallway, I realized I was still holding it. I couldn’t go back in there. So I’d return it tomorrow. Or maybe I’d just tell Richard I wasn’t going to do those classes ever again. There wasn’t really any point. Not really.

I stepped outside, but couldn’t see Leo’s car yet.

It was going to be painful to have to make small talk and suppress these tears, nudge away this grief gnawing at my insides. A scream built. Leaning against the wall, I fought this urge to retch.

“Ms. Lauren?” a man’s voice called out.

I’d only been vaguely aware of that SUV parked against the curb. The short, burly looking guy came over. “Mia Lauren?”

“Yes.” I tried to look like I was fine.

He handed me an envelope. “You’ve been served.”

Jaw gaping and totally confused, I watched him climb back into his car. He drove away, his back tires leaving a spray of leaves.

Unsure whether I should open it or not, I ran back inside and bumped right into Dominic.

A small miracle, considering he was an attorney and would know what I was meant to do with this and why I’d been given it. I still found Dominic intimidating. The first time I’d met him he’d been wearing a toga at one of Chrysalis’s parties. A perfect outfit for the man who ruled this place with an iron fist on Cameron’s behalf. Dominic oozed authority.

Though today he was overly cheerful and asking me about London, chatting away casually. He really did seem to like me.

I raised the envelope.

Dominic gave a knowing nod. “Ah, we thought you’d get one.”

“What is it?”

“Dr. Cole has a trial pending. It’s a subpoena.”

“What for?”

“The Board of Psychiatry is undertaking a preliminary investigation into Dr. Cole’s practice. Depending on their findings, the trial may or may not progress to a formal trial with a jury.”

“Practice?”

“We think Lance Merrill’s behind it,” he said. “Or his wife. Please don’t worry about this Mia. We’ll go over what you should say. I’ll guide you through it.”

Cameron had just locked another sub away in his dungeon. Maybe caution should be his priority right now.

Dominic took a phone call and walked over to the reception for privacy.

I ripped open the envelope and read the subpoena. I was called to the trial as a witness and this nightmare was a week away. My tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth and I found it hard to swallow.

Medicine was everything to Cameron, and one more personal attack was going to destroy him. That explained why he’d looked so sad.

Not sad, lost.

Maybe it was also the reason he was going to soothe his pain with a session. I couldn’t leave knowing he was going through this. We’d been through too much together. I needed to see him before I left. Surely he’d take a few minutes for me?

Getting past Dominic and heading into the lower chambers of Chrysalis was surprisingly easy.

The chill of the lowest chambers.

Deadly quiet.

I wondered what she’d be like. A blonde like me, or a brunette. She’d be pretty, I knew that. Smart too, and perhaps carrying the kind of pain I’d once had before Cameron saved me. Like I had to save him now.

Braving to witness her look of bliss, as well as Cameron’s devotion that would no doubt be worn on his face, I clutched the door handle.

I’d be saving myself a whole lot of pain if I just walked away and let him deal with this himself. He had Dominic after all. He had the girls. He had Richard.

A surge of emotions. Who was I to make a difference? Who was I to interrupt this intimate session?

Don’t do this to yourself.

My hand pressed against the door and I nudged it open.

In my mind’s eye I saw her naked, taller, slimmer, perfectly toned, her beauty so stunning she’d take a man’s breath away and steal his heart.

Her look of rapture…

The Saint Andrews Cross stood alone.

Silence hung so intense it felt unnatural.

In the center, lying on a long table, was Cameron, and he’d removed his shoes and thrown them across the room. His jacket was off, as was his tie, and his shirt collar fell open. His left hand fell over his eyes.

Tiptoeing towards him, my gaze swept the room, hoping not to catch a glimpse of the elusive sub in waiting. Or any sign she’d been here.

No one else was here.

Cameron shifted his hand and raised his head.

“I got a subpoena,” I whispered, defending myself for being here.

He gave a nod and reached his hand out to me.

With an easy strength, he pulled me up and onto his chest, positioning me so that I lay along him. I nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck and breathed him in. Cameron clutched me tightly, holding me close, resting his cheek against my head.

We didn’t need words.

All we needed in this moment was each other.

CHAPTER 41

THAT KISS TO my head had been Cameron’s way of telling me I should go.

And that I didn’t belong here.

I’d slipped off him and left the room as quietly as I’d entered. My heart cracked in two at the thought he was hurting. It was heart-wrenching to see him like this. Half in a daze, I made my way back to his office.

Inside, I rummaged through his files and soon found what I was looking for. I jotted down Henry’s address on a post-it-note and shoved the file back in the cabinet. Then I headed on out without being seen.

Leo was waiting at the curb, ready to take me back to Enthrall.

As this Bel Air landscape faded from view, I let my imagination run off and imagined the kind of jobs the people did to be able to afford living in those sprawling mansions.

All thoughts led back to him.

My phone lit up and Bailey’s number flashed on the screen. We’d missed each other for a few days now and I couldn’t wait to hear her voice. She was my best friend, yet over the last few weeks I’d shouldered everything alone.

“Hello,” I said, sitting back.

“Hello, Mrs. Elusive,” she shot back.

“I’ve missed you so much.”

“Me too. Are you doing okay? I’ve been worried about you.”

“I’m doing great.” I swallowed the lie. “How’s work?”

“Awesome. I just got promoted to charge nurse.”

“Bailey, that’s incredible. I knew it wouldn’t be long before you’d be running the place.”

“Hardly. Still, I get an extra dollar an hour. It all helps.”

“It sure does.”

“Oh my God, Mia, I almost forgot. How was London?”

“Pretty dreamy, actually.”

“Go on, girl. Spill.”

I told her about my trip abroad and Bailey listened intently, sometimes sensing there was more to what I was telling her and fishing for it. It was nice to catch up on all her news too.

“I have something to tell you.” She sang the words.

“What?”

“Guess what? We’re engaged!”

“Oh Bailey, that’s incredible news. Please tell me I didn’t miss anything?”

“No listen, that’s why I’m calling. We’re going to Las Vegas this weekend and we want you to be there when we tell her parents. They’re meeting us there. We’re going on to spend New Year’s Eve with them in Santa Barbara so they can get to know me better. Only they don’t know that bit.” She chuckled nervously.

This happiness for her morphed into a hole in my stomach.

Was I really prepared to leave Hope and Jasmine alone in the house for an entire weekend with my boyfriend? A self-confessed nymphomaniac and his ex’s twin, who strolled around the house complaining of the humidity and to compensate wore only a thong and a tight fitting t-shirt.

“So Tara’s ready to come out to her mom then?” I asked.

The line went quiet and I knew why. Tara’s mother, a talented violinist, had emigrated from India after marrying her dad, who was a famous conductor. Mrs. Razor was Americanized but apparently still very conservative.

“Bailey?”

She took a deep breath in. “You know how her mom is. Tara’s frightened her family will disown her.”

“That won’t happen,” I said. “I’ll be there however you need me.”

“I knew you’d come through for me,” she said. “You are the most amazing friend ever.”

“I still have your Christmas present to give you.”

“I have yours in the back of my car.” She squealed with delight. “Let’s get drunk in Vegas.”

“It’s a date.”

We chatted some more and we might as well have never been apart.

Leo took me back to Enthrall.

After throwing my handbag in the coffee room, I headed on in to Richard’s office and found him typing away behind his desk. Jasmine was in his office, fast asleep on his long leather couch. That girl spent half her life sleeping and I put it down to the lack of calories she consumed to keep her model figure.

Standing before Richard’s desk, I came out with it, my voice a whisper, “Sir, this Friday...”

“Yes,” whispered Richard, his gaze finding mine, his hand still moving the mouse.

It was hard not to be distracted by the sleeping beauty on his couch. Jasmine rolled over, seemingly not caring that she was encroaching on Richard’s work time.

“Well, Bailey has asked me to be with her when she and Tara come out to her parents. She’s engaged. Isn’t that great?”

“Great news,” he said. “Good for them.”

“It’s this Friday?” I said. “Actually, the entire weekend in Vegas.”

“You just got back from London.”

“I’m sorry. I know. Only Bailey’s my best friend and she needs me.”

“Needs you for Las Vegas?” He frowned. “I’m sorry, Mia, any other weekend. I’ve told Hope we’ll all spend some time together before she heads back to New York.”

“She’s my best friend.”

“I’ve already made plans for us.”

Jasmine stirred, yawned, and sat up.

I turned to her. “Could you give us a second?”

“She’s fine there,” said Richard.

“We’re talking about something private.”

Jasmine got off the couch and strolled over. She fell to her knees before Richard and lowered her head.

In complete astonishment, I watched as Richard’s hand rested atop her head. Her admiring gaze rose to meet his and they shared a look of affection. His eyes fluttered in reaction to her show of obedience. I’d seen subspace before and Richard was in it.

What the fuck.

“Permission to get a drink, sir?” asked Jasmine.

“Granted,” he said, his gaze staying on her as she elegantly rose.

Jasmine headed out.

“I got a subpoena.” I fished around inside my handbag and handed it to him.

Richard took it off me and tucked it into a drawer.

“What am I going to do?” I said. “I’m terrified.”

“It’ll be fine. Cameron’s done nothing wrong. Let’s discuss it later.” Richard raised a hand. “This is a fine opportunity to observe Jasmine. Perhaps you’ll learn something.”

I went to ask if he expected the same kind of behavior from me, and the realization was so unsettling and so obvious, my voice abandoned me.

“Will there be anything else?” he said.

“You’re saying I can’t go, sir?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.” His hand moved the mouse and his attention returned to his screen.

“Bailey and Tara need me.” I rested my hands on my hips. “This is important to me.”

“Hope’s important to me.”

I wanted to ask him if this had anything to do with last night, after he found me at Cameron’s place and stabbed his best friend in the stomach with a saber.

“Sorry, Mia,” said Richard, as he resumed clicking away on his screen.

That vision of Jasmine kneeling before him sent a wave of panic. Maybe this was a good thing, me not going to Vegas. After all, goodness knows what Richard would get up to with me not there. Perhaps instead of partying I should be defending what was mine.

My stomach twisted with doubt. Bailey and I were like sisters. She’d always been there for me. Always.

CHAPTER 42

THE ART OF submission really did have its benefits.

Not only had Richard come round, he’d let me borrow his Jeep Wrangler, giving me permission to drive to Vegas by myself. Considering I was now carless, having left my BMW at Cameron’s, this was a small blessing.

As was the fact his Wrangler came with snow chains, if needed.

I’d gone into full on submissive mode, serving Richard with everything from food, beverages, and all the way to mind altering sex. So it was no surprise that by the time Friday came round Richard was comfortable with me going to Las Vegas.

I had to be there for Bailey and Tara, that I knew, though leaving my boyfriend alone with the woman who resembled his lost love and Jasmine, who was a self confessed nympho, brought a wave of uncertainty.

It was time to test out these trust issues, I reassured myself. Let the universe do its thing and help me grow into the person I yearned to be--confident, self-assured, and with a heavy dose of self-respect.

My mind cruelly teased me with images of Richard going at it with both of them at the same time, and I tried to shove those thoughts away.

I was going to have to concentrate.

Suri was guiding me through unfamiliar terrain and it was hard not to be distracted by the stunning views. Surrounding me was lush forest, and when that opened up, I caught the snow tipped mountains not that far way. It was hard to believe I was still in California.

To my right was Big Bear Lake. I was getting closer.

Not so long ago, I’d flown over Big Bear in Cameron’s helicopter and landed in Jasmine’s garden. Though going it alone now in this rugged territory felt like the most daring adventure I’d ever taken.

Within a few hours I’d be on my way to Vegas, having set an entire empire back on its feet. I knew I could pull this off. I’d be using every skill Cameron had taught me and drawing on a few of my own.

A driveway stretched toward the forested property with trees that partially masked the presence of a cabin. My heart raced with anticipation that this was the right place. It would be getting dark soon, and with all this nature too close for comfort, getting stuck in a snow drift would be a hard one to explain to Richard. He and Cameron could never know I’d ever been here.

I had no choice but to trust my GPS.

I parked, popped the trunk, and grabbed the box of groceries I’d bought on the way here.

The trepidation I felt was fierce.

Up the few short steps I trotted, sure this gift would be well received. I mean, why it wouldn’t be? Everyone loved gifts, and those Scottish shortbread cookies I’d bought from the British shop in Santa Monica were bound to be appreciated.

If this went wrong, I’d be screwed.

You’ve come all this way, my muse comforted. Trust your intuition.

I balanced the box on my left knee and knocked.

A bark came from inside the cabin. A man’s voice told the dog to be quiet.

The door flew open—

Henry looked about forty.

He had Cameron’s good looks and the same dark brown eyes, those familiar chiseled Cole features, only with grey specked sideburns and a straggly short beard. He wore a black sweater, hunting trousers, and hiking boots.

“I have your delivery,” I said.

He frowned at the box. “It’s not due till Monday.”

“I’m early.”

“Where’s Bret?”

A black Labrador trotted out behind him and sniffed at my feet.

I couldn’t take my stare off Henry. It was like looking at an older version of Cameron. Those dashing good looks were disarming. The way he stood tall and proud, as if that good breeding wasn’t even lost all the way out here.

“I’m Mia.” I glanced at his dog. “Hello you.”

“Dex,” snapped Henry. “Go back in.”

“He’s cute.”

Dex panted away and stayed where he was.

“Yep,” said Henry. “’Bout sums him up.” He stepped forwards and took the box out of my hands. “Thank you. Have a safe journey back.”

“Um, can I use your restroom, please?”

“No.” He turned and went back inside, using his foot to slam the door in my face.

What the hell?

I knocked. “I’ve come a long way. I need to pee.”

“Who are you?” He shouted through the door.

“Mia Lauren.”

“You’re not local?”

“No.”

He yanked open the door. “Bret delivers from Danny’s.”

I gave a nod, as though I knew this.

“So who the fuck are you?” he said.

“I really need to use the—”

“There you go.” He pointed to the woods.

“Surely you’re not suggesting I go out here?”

“Yes, I am.”

“What about the bears?”

“My money’s on the bears.” He turned and slammed the door.

I knocked again. “I’ll accidently pee on your front porch. That’ll really attract the bears.”

Nothing.

“I don’t have any toilet roll,” I called out.

The door flew open. “Back room. Keep the seat up. You women obsess over the seat being down. Well this is my place. The seat stays up.”

I hurried in.

The cabin was cozy, and surprisingly tidy considering what I’d heard about Henry. Which really wasn’t very much.

Rustic furniture was positioned here and there, with a deep orange couch in the corner, and over there sat several big armchairs. The low level lighting gave the place an outdoorsy feel. It looked simple enough from the outside but had all the luxury amenities inside. Like that flat screen TV on the far wall and those dark wooden beams above. Several doors led off in either direction. A stuffed moose head had been mounted and its beady eyes followed me all the way to the restroom.

As did Dex, who panted at the base of the door as though waiting for me to come out.

After using the restroom and taking in the continued theme of rustic, I was ready to face Henry again.

I met him halfway in the living room. “May I have a drink of water?” I knelt to pat Dex.

“You really are full of demands.” Henry ambled over to the sink, turned on the faucet, and filled a mug.

“Thank you.” I rose to my feet and took it from him.

“I have to get back to work,” he said. “So…” He gestured to the door.

“What do you do?” I said. “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“I do mind.”

“This is a lovely cabin.”

“Okay, how about I put this in English. Fuck off cunt.” He looked thoughtful. “Yes, I think that covered everything.”

“You’re just like your brother. Only more rugged.”

“My brother’s an ass.”

“I like him. A lot actually.”

“You’re trespassing.”

“You invited me in.”

“And I regret it.”

“Did you kill that moose?” I gestured to it.

“Oh yes. Right after it trespassed in here.” He strolled over to the desk. “Slit his throat with a pen knife.”

“His throat looks intact to me.”

“He’s missing his body. Or did you miss that?” He shook his head, as though baffled. Henry picked up a wallet and rifled through it. “Scared yet?”

“Not really, no.”

“Here’s the tip you’re waiting for.” He offered several ten dollar bills.

“No need. This is complimentary.”

“Did my brother send you?”

“Cameron?”

“You work for him?”

“Yes.”

He glowered. “Did my brother send me a prostitute?”

“No. That’s very rude.”

“Well, you’re very—” He waved his hand— “Easy on the eyes.”

“So are you.”

“What. Do. You. Want?”

“A cup of tea would be nice. I’ve come a long way.”

“You’re in the middle of nowhere. I’m a crazy ass man living alone in a cabin. You’re in danger.”

“I don’t believe that.”

“Okay, let’s hear it then. What’s the message?”

“From Cameron?”

“Yes, what does my younger brother want? And why did he send you?”

“He doesn’t know I’m here.”

“Does anyone know you’re here?”

“I left a note at home. So if anything happens to me—”

He pointed at me. “What are you up to?”

I swallowed hard, doubt creeping in. Cameron hadn’t mentioned anything about Henry being dangerous. Maybe he’d not thought that detail needed to be shared. After all he’d never have suspected I’d pay a visit.

Henry rubbed his face. “My advice is leave now before you’re snowed in.”

“Checked the weather report. We’re all good.”

“The weather is unpredictable. She’s a bitch like that. Very temperamental. Like most bitches actually.”

“When was the last time you had a nice home cooked meal?”

“The last time I shoved a packet in the microwave. Why?”

“I can cook you dinner.” I wandered over to the box and lifted out the tin of tomatoes. “Beef Bolognaise?”

“Are you press? Because if you are—”

“No.”

“Did my parents send you?”

“No.”

“Mia, I don’t have any more money—”

“I’m not press and I don’t want your money.”

He looked impatient.

“Okay,” I said. “I’ll tell you why I’m here.”

“I’m all ears.”

“Cameron’s in trouble and he needs you.”

“What kind of trouble?”

“I brought a bottle of wine? Want a glass?”

“Mia!”

That moose head was staring at me.

I looked back at Henry. “Cameron’s being accused of doing something unconventional.”

“That’s hard to believe.” He scoffed “What’s he done now?”

“He’s used an unusual technique on a client.”

He took a deep breath in. “In what way?”

“It’s a little delicate?”

“He over drugged?”

“No, he…” I searched for the words. “Spanked them and...”

Henry blinked at me. “They probably deserved it.”

“You don’t find it shocking?”

“How well do you know my brother?”

“Pretty well.”

He hesitated. “I’m not discussing this with you. You’re a stranger.”

“I’m Richard Booth’s girlfriend.” I reached into my handbag and pulled out my iPhone.

I ignored the text from Richard asking if I’d arrived in Las Vegas yet and scrolled through the photos. I found the one of me and Richard atop a double-decker bus. “We took it in London,” I told Henry, and handed over my phone. “You know Richard, right?”

Henry peered at it. “You’re dating Cam’s best friend?”

“Yes.”

“And yet you’re infatuated with my brother?”

“What makes you say that?”

Henry shook his head. “He always was popular with the ladies.” He continued to scroll.

“What are you doing?”

“Looking for my brother’s number. I’m going to ask him to come get you. He’ll fly up in his fuck mobile and extract you from my home.”

I leaped forwards and grabbed my phone back. “He mustn’t know I’m here.”

“Why not?”

“He’d be upset with me.”

“Why?”

“Because you’ve been through so much already. It’s just—”

His eyes widened.

“How about a nice glass of wine?” I offered.

“Get out.”

“No, please. I’ve come this far. And I nearly got lost.”

“That would have been a tragedy,” he said. “Mia, I’m respectfully asking you to leave.”

“I know your family. I had dinner with them. I met your sister, Willow, and your parents. I love your Aunt Rose.”

“What has this got to do with anything?”

“I know Cameron really well. I was his submissive for a while.”

Henry blinked at me. “Submissive?”

“Yes, you know about that?”

“BDSM?”

“Yes.”

“Hell, why didn’t you say. I have a belt around here somewhere. Bend over and I’ll whip some sense into you.”

My shoulders dropped and I hung my head in exasperation. “I really need your help, Henry.”

“What can I possibly do?”

“Can I cook us up some dinner? I’m starving. Then I’ll tell you everything.”

“Let me guess. You were one of the patients my brother spanked?”

“I was never a patient. He took me through my submissive training. He helped me to unblock a few things.”

“Are you mentally ill?”

“No.”

“Not that you’d admit it.”

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Life happens. Things hurt you and you end up—”

“Living in a cabin in the woods?”

“I didn’t mean…”

He flung up his arms. “You’re making me miss my favorite movie.”

“What’s that?”

“Texas Chain Saw Massacre. I really connect with that film for some reason. Love me some Leatherface.”

“Nope, still not scared.”

“For fuck sake.” He stared off, exasperated. “That wine better be worth it.”

“It’s a Cabernet Sauvignon. One of your brother’s favs.”

He rolled his eyes.

“Pour yourself a glass while I get going on dinner?” I said, and hurried over before he changed his mind. “I need a can opener.”

“I’ll pour us both a glass. How about that?”

I motioned to the bottle. “I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I have to drive to Vegas tonight.”

“I’m not drinking alone,” he said. “After a couple of glasses, you’ll be staying here tonight, Mia.”

“But—”

“These are my terms.” He lowered his gaze. “Choose.”

CHAPTER 43

THE WINE WENT to my head, but I was grateful for this buzz lessening the tension.

Henry had relaxed a little, but he still glanced at me sideways with an air of suspicion.

With classical music playing in the background, I’d settled into cooking with Henry pottering around the house. Now and again he paused to look over at me, as though trying to work out how I’d wrangled being here.

We’d settled on that rustic couch, both of us over stuffed after devouring enough Beef Bolognaise for four.

I leaned back and rubbed my stomach. “That was delicious, even if I say so myself.”

“It was,” he said. “Where do you put it?”

“Must be all this fresh air up here.” I reached for my handbag and pulled out my phone. “I have to let Bailey know I’m going to be late.”

He watched me text. “She’ll live.”

“She’s my best friend,” I explained. “She and her girlfriend Tara are coming out to Tara’s parents this weekend.”

He arched a brow and I tried to read his reaction, unsure how conservative he was.

“So you’re lending your support?” he said.

“Yes. You know, cheer them on. Whatever they need really.”

“You’re one little Ms. Do-gooder,” he said. “Or do you just revel in other people’s drama?”

“I like to help,” I said defensively.

“What do you do for my brother?”

“I’m his executive assistant at Enthrall.”

“You don’t strike me as a dominatrix?”

“No, I just book appointments and make sure the clients are comfortable. That kind of thing.”

“So what do you know about me?”

“Cameron respects your privacy,’ I said, looking up from my phone. “I kind of put the pieces of the puzzle together.”

He looked affronted.

“What I meant was there really is very little about you. I know Shay and he kind of…”

“Gardner?”

“Yes.”

“We served in the SEALs together,” he said. “Looks like you know that?”

“I’m sorry about everything you went through.” I raised my hand to reassure him. “I don’t know much, not really, but I know you went through a terrible ordeal.”

He gave a thin smile.

“People can be very cruel,” I said.

“Pretty girls like you shouldn’t be exposed to the horrors of war.”

“Women go into combat too.”

“In the SEALs, that’s rare.”

“I’m tougher then you think,” I said. “Cameron showed me that.”

He ran his hand over Dex’s head and his dog settled next to him.

“I survived a traumatic memory too,” I said. “A drug dealer gave the wrong dose of cocaine to my mom. It killed her.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“I couldn’t help her because her dealer shot me up with cocaine first.” I tapped my head. “I remember everything now. Even those snakeskin boots he was wearing.”

“My brother helped you remember that?”

“Yes.”

“Wouldn’t you rather have not remembered?”

“All my life I thought I’d not been there for my mom. That I’d let her die. Alone.”

“Where was your dad?”

“Left to go live in L.A.” I shrugged. “Then he pretended he was dead.”

He gave a frown.

“Your brother’s been amazing in helping me work through all this.”

Henry was still frowning.

“He helps so many people,” I continued. “Cameron says for those of us who have suffered, our highs are so much more profound. Our best days are better.”

“Are you in love with him?”

My gaze fell on Dex. “He’s been good to me.”

Henry stared at me for the longest time. “Degradation. Do you know what that means?”

My stare rose to meet his.

He grimaced. “They make their prisoners eat their own shit.”

I forced myself to hold his gaze and see his pain.

“That is the kindest thing they do,” he said quietly. “Everything else is way beyond what you’d believe is humanly possible.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Not sure why I’m telling you this. You have this way about you.”

“It’s a surprise any man can come out of it without…”

“Having a nervous breakdown?”

“People have breakdowns anyway and have never faced anything like what you went through.”

His face contorted in fear and he shot to his feet. Dex scurried to stand beside him and peered up.

“What’s wrong?” I said.

“I have to walk Dex.”

“Can I come with you?”

“I’ll only be a minute.”

I’d triggered a memory. Taken him all the way back into a past he needed to never think of again. I felt terrible.

“Henry,” I burst out. “I’m so sorry. I have no knowledge of these things. I shouldn’t have brought it up. Forgive me.”

“I brought it up,” he said faintly. “Go get your leash.”

Dex scampered into the kitchen.

Henry looked at me. “That’s why they keep me at arm’s length. I lean towards spontaneity. A small embarrassment for the family.”

“Actually your family still want you to run Cole Tea.”

“I doubt that. The shares would plummet if anyone found out I was anywhere near Cole Tea. After six months in the desert, I lost the art of social graces. Or, should I say, the art of giving a fuck.”

“I think that’s a wonderful trait,” I said. “I’m always tiptoeing around everyone, scared I’ll offend or terrified I’ll get into trouble.”

“Maybe we can teach each other something?”

“What could I teach you?”

“You already have,” he said. “Turns out I can be in the room with a woman and not die of boredom.”

“Women aren’t boring.”

“They kind of are.”

“You were with men too long,” I said. “You haven’t found the right woman. Take the dominatrixes at Enthrall. They’re true babes in every sense of the word. They’re smart and funny and sassy and super sexy. Why, I’ll introduce you to one of them, if you like. Not lady Penny, though. She’s married. You might like Mistress Scarlet. She scares the hell out of me, but I think you’d like her.”

His gaze stayed on me for the longest time. “You’re the funniest thing I’ve ever met.”

My shoulders slumped as my ego deflated.

Henry knelt and secured Dex’s leash. “Where did my brother find you?”

“He saw me in a photo and thought I’d be perfect for his best friend to date.”

Henry coughed as though suppressing a laugh.

“Cameron didn’t exactly make his plans known,” I said.

“He’s a sly bastard.” He gestured for me to follow him.

I grabbed my coat, pulled it on, and headed out into the night.

A burst of fresh air hit us on the way out.

Henry turned right and strolled onwards, allowing room on the long leash for Dex to roam ahead.

“Cameron loves you so much,” I said, trying to keep up. “That’s why I’m here.”

Dex froze and his nose burrowed. His tail shot up. To my left spread out the lake and its surface appeared like black glass; beautiful and soothing. An animal cried out from somewhere deep in the forest, followed by a howl.

“You’re not going to lock me out here tonight, are you?” I said.

“Did cross my mind.”

I tried to ignore that. “There’s going to be a trial. Cameron has to face this board of psychiatrists to prove he’s done nothing wrong.”

“That should be fun.”

“And your dad is hard on his case,” I said. “He wants Cameron to give up psychiatry and become the CEO of Cole Tea. That is, if you don’t want too.”

“Now that’s what I called karma.”

“Because of what he did to you in the desert?” I said.

Henry stopped walking and turned to me.

“The way he debriefed you,” I muttered. “What happened to you afterwards. He refuses to forgive himself.”

“Dex,” snapped Henry. “We do not eat road kill. We’ve been over this.”

Dex broke away from sniffing what might have once have been a squirrel.

I couldn’t look at it. “What do you mean karma?”

He turned and began the walk back.

“Henry?”

“My brother’s always controlling other people’s lives because he thinks he’s smarter than everyone else.”

“He’s trying to control his environment,” I said. “To prevent anyone else getting hurt. For those hurt, he wants to heal them.”

“That very insightful.”

“So you’ll come to the trial and support him?” I said. “Be there for him? Show him you’ve forgiven him for that terrible ordeal in the desert?”

Henry looked astonished.

It was as though the world took a breath.

He stared off across the lake. “A mind can fracture if pushed too far. You don’t even feel it happening. Just snaps. And you’re gone.”

“During the debriefing?” I whispered.

“No, during my capture.”

“Cameron hates himself because he kept you in that tent afterwards.”

He shrugged. “Couldn’t have done it without him. The plot involved an attack on Time Square.”

My feet felt unsteady with the realization. These two brothers had saved the lives of thousands of people. The consequences tore them apart instead of a city.

“You don’t hate him?” I whispered.

“He’s my brother.” Henry gestured to the house. “He pays for all this.”

“Cameron thinks he’s the cause of you being here.”

“Then he’s an idiot.”

“Perhaps you could talk to him?” I said. “Please say you’ll come to the trial. He needs you.”

Henry turned and started back for the house.

I hurried after him. “Will you?”

Dex licked my fingers and I bent to scratch his chin.

“I’m sorry, Mia. I can’t help you,” said Henry. “This is my life now. I spend my days painting, watching TV or movies, staying well out of hell.”

“Hell?”

“Society.”

He climbed the steps of the cabin and walked back in.

There was no more talk of him ever leaving Big Bear. Henry would hear no more of it.

He rinsed our dinner plates and the cooking utensils and placed them in the dishwasher. I worked beside him tidying the kitchen.

Reassured by Bailey’s text that she was okay with me running a little late, I tucked my phone back into my handbag and headed out to the jeep. I brought in my suitcase. Henry met me by the door and carried it all the way in for me.

Considering he’d not wanted me here at all an hour ago, I felt lucky he’d changed his mind and was at least willing to hear me out. Now that our conversation had left all the horrors of war and Cameron’s troubles behind, he seemed to like the company. Something told me this surprised him as much as me.

He made up the spare bedroom and left me to climb into bed. He and Dex headed off to sleep.

I thanked him for letting me stay. Even if I’d failed at persuading him it had been nice to get to know him a little. It was actually like spending time with Cameron in an odd kind of way. Their similarities went deeper than just looks.

The small bedroom was cozy.

I stripped off my clothes and changed into my pajamas. Within a few minutes, I’d washed up, brushed my teeth, and finished readying for bed. I was tired after that long drive here and that tasty hot meal. The wine made me drowsy.

This bedroom was small but cozy. Everything was clean and well taken care of and I could see Henry looked after his home lovingly.

Pulling back the curtain, I peeked out at the view. It really was spectacular. That sheer lake was breathtaking. A flock of birds flew low over it. One tried to catch up with the others and I willed it on.

A scream left my lungs.

My hand slapped to my mouth as I staggered back. The thing was going to kill me.

Yes. It. Fucking. Was.

That big fat hairy spider with yellow spots scurried up the wall, all eight legs moving too fast for that to be okay.

Henry burst in.

I pointed at the wall.

He ran over to it and caught the spider, cupping it in his hands. We might as well have been camping, for goodness sake. He opened the window and set it free. Not that I wanted it dead, but I also didn’t want it coming back around to find me again.

“Okay now?” he said.

“Not really.” My hands shook. “How many of those are around here?”

“Well, we’re kind of in their territory.”

The thought of seeing another spider freaked me out.

“Night, Mia.” Henry headed out and shut the door behind him.

I yanked the curtains closed.

Under the covers, with my head resting on a soft eiderdown pillow, I closed my eyes and willed myself to sleep. So far this visit had been a mega fail. It had been nice meeting Henry, but there was no way to persuade him how much Cameron needed him. Henry had been through a lot and I was asking so much of him. This place was his refuge, and understanding this came all too easily. So many times I too had wanted to escape Los Angeles and run away from everyone.

I hoped Cameron would never find out I’d come here. I could only imagine his fury.

A low growl rose from outside my windowsill.

My feet landed firmly on the hardwood floors and I flew out of there, scurrying down the hallway.

I nudged open Henry’s door. He was tucked into bed with the blankets pulled over him. Dex lay beside him, snuggled close.

Henry pushed himself up the bed. “Found another one?”

“I know this sounds strange. But is there any chance…”

“Yes?”

“Are there coyotes around here?”

“You heard something?”

“You could say that. It sounded like a growl.”

“It could have been a mountain lion. Or a bobcat.”

“And that’s okay with you?” I screeched.

He gave a laugh and held his hand out to me. “Come on, city girl.”

I closed the door and turned back to him. “Just so we’re clear, there’ll be no sex.”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” he said with a smirk.

Climbing in beside him, I tucked my legs under the comforter and burrowed beneath the blankets. The warmth of his body rested against my back as he spooned behind me. Yes, we’d only just met, but there was no way my body was being dragged off by some strange animal without him noticing now. Surely my carcass being ferreted away would awaken him?

He sniffed my head. “Your hair smells of strawberries.”

“That’s my shampoo.”

“Thank you for clarifying that. For a minute there, I thought you’d stuck your head in a bowl of strawberries.”

“Very funny.”

“Coyotes love strawberries.”

“Henry.”

He chuckled.

“I like your pillows,” I said.

“Why, thank you. Get that a lot actually.”

“When was the last time you cuddled?”

“Are you going to talk all night?”

“I’m getting settled.”

“It’s been a while,” he said. “I don’t get too many visitors to be honest. Not the spooning kind, anyway. Please tell me you don’t snore.”

“No.”

“You’re one very brave lady,” he said. “I’ll give you that.”

“Other than spiders, I’ll face off with pretty much anything,” I said. “You’re the brave one, Henry. I don’t think it’s really dawned on you yet.”

“What’s that?”

“How incredible you are.”

There came the softest inhale of breath.

His hand wrapped around my waist tighter. “No sex,” he said. “Just cuddling. You have my word as an officer and a gentlemen.”

“See, isn’t this nice? You might want to consider meeting a nice girl who you can spoon with every night. My offer on a dominatrix still stands.”

“Aren’t I the lucky one?” he said. “Now get some sleep. You have quite the drive tomorrow.”

I raised my head off the pillow. “What is that?”

“What?”

“That.”

“Dex,” he said. “He’s dreaming.”

Dex was asleep at the foot of the bed, his hind leg twitching and scratching the bedsheet.

“Here.” Henry reached towards his side table and brought over a pair of headphones. He eased them over my ears.

A flood of music filled me with a profound, comforting aura. A piano wooed, lulling…

Resting my head back down, soothed by these haunting, mesmerizing notes, I felt my limbs relax, my shoulders lower. Henry placed his iPhone in front of me.

“Thank you,” I whispered, and reached out to scroll over the dial. A moody instrumental piece was playing. Captured Through a Quiet Window by Steve Jansen. “Beautiful. Cameron likes this kind of music too.”

In his arms, calmed by this hypnotic music, I drifted off.

Carried away into a dream, I strolled along hallways with dramatic paintings of angels on either side, and above, a row of chandeliers with crystal droplets twinkling.

When I woke up, it was still dark.

Henry was no longer beside me. The bedside clock stated it was 5AM. I climbed out and went looking for him.

Henry was in the kitchen and the tempting smell of coffee filled the cabin.

“Egg sandwich?” he said, leaving the pan for a second to pour two fresh coffees into two mugs.

“Yes please,” I said, taking my place at the kitchen table. “You’re up early. I hope I didn’t keep you up?”

“Slept like a baby,” he said. “We have to get you on the road. Your friends need you. Mission ‘coming out’ is underway.”

I raised my hand in a cheer. “Team Bailey and Tara.”

Henry waved his hand too.

“Thank you for this,” I said, as I took a sip of coffee.

“I’m feeling a little guilty for keeping you from your friends,” he said. “At this time, you’ll make it to Vegas in three or four hours.”

“Sounds perfect,” I said.

We ate breakfast and chatted away.

He’d been destined to join the family business after his military career, he told me, only his six months in Afghanistan had put the kybosh on that. He’d left the military with PTSD and needed intensive therapy just so he could leave his cabin. It was hard to hear how bad things had been, but I sensed talking was helping him.

Henry’s nightmares had stopped and he didn’t drop to the ground any more when hearing a car alarm. Quite the progress, he jested, though he still found it challenging to be around people. He read too much into their expressions and sensed their angst; he couldn’t bear to think they were struggling too. Henry had been drowning and the thought of helping anyone else made him fear he’d take someone with him.

His initial scariness had gone. Henry was smart, funny, and kind, and now that his dark brown eyes didn’t scare me, I could admire his handsome ruggedness. Had he wanted to, he could have turned on the Cole charm, only it seemed he just didn’t care about all that.

I apologized for turning up out of the blue last night and he told me he understood why I’d done it.

Before I climbed back into my Jeep Wrangler, I accepted the bottle of water he handed me, as well as his promise Cameron never need know about our visit.

We hugged goodbye.

This had been good for both of us, it seemed.

I threw a wave to Henry and Dex and took off for Las Vegas.

CHAPTER 44

PERCHED ON THE edge of the hotel bed, I pressed my phone to my ear. “I took the scenic route.”

Richard sounded exasperated. “You were going to text me once you arrived.”

“I fell asleep.” It was not too much of a lie. I’d checked in to the Bellagio, and the moment I’d gotten to my room I’d collapsed on the bed. That drive from Big Bear had wiped me out. Though Henry had been right. It had only taken me three hours.

This was a lovely room. The décor luxurious, the furnishing looking new, and I had an entire weekend of relaxation ahead of me.

“Are you telling me you slept fourteen hours?” said Richard. “Mia, are you still there?”

“Reception’s not too good down here.”

“Vegas is up, Mia. You wonder why I worry about you,” he said. “And you’re in the Bellagio. Wifi comes with the room.”

“I miss you too, my darling.”

“I was worried about you.”

“I’m quite capable of taking care of myself.”

“Yes, but as my sub—”

“How are things in the harem?”

He breathed heavily. “Hope’s gone back to New York.”

Great, so you’re alone with Jasmine now?

“Mia?”

“Yes.”

“I took Jasmine over to Chrysalis,” he said.

“Why?”

“She needs a new master.”

Not Cameron. Don’t let it be Cameron.

“Will it be…”

“Cameron’s going to help Jasmine through this transition. It’s pretty stressful for a sub to lose a master. Shay’s with her right now.”

Although I wouldn’t want this carpet in my house, I liked it. There was a modern feel to the circled pattern.

Just tell me it’s not Cameron and don’t drag this out.

I lay back down on the bed, my legs trembling.

Shaking myself from this nightmare, I asked, “So everything in London worked out okay?”

“Let’s not discuss this on a hotel phone.”

“Of course. Sorry.”

“Have you seen Bailey?”

“Heading over to her room now.”

“Why did you choose the Bellagio?”

“You can see the water fountain from the room.” Though I didn’t share it also had a special deal. “It’s their engagement present.”

“I wanted to talk to you about that.”

A knock at the door made me jump. I’d ordered room service.

“I’ve ordered up fresh coffee,” I told him. “I’ll call you right back.”

“Check in at lunch time.”

“Check in?”

“Yes, Mia, Vegas is…well I worry about you.”

“I’ll be fine. I’m with Bailey and Tara. It’s not like we’re going to any clubs and going trapping.”

“Trapping?”

“It’s a term Tara uses.”

“Text me every ten seconds.”

“I will.” I laughed and headed over to answer the door.

Within the hour, I’d finished off the entire pot of fresh coffee, taken a shower, and dressed in jeans, t-shirt, and pumps, and was ready to join Bailey and Tara for some ‘slot machine action.’

The elevator took me five floors up and I soon found their room.

I knocked and waited.

The door flew open and Bailey greeted me, all perfect teeth smile and red hair. This girl could win a Miss America competition.

Tara stood behind her. “Ready for some slot machine action?”

This was a gorgeous couple. What with Tara’s tall lithe frame and Indian complexion, inherited from her mother born in Calcutta, and Bailey’s fresh faced beauty, they really stood out. They’d probably be mistaken for show girls.

“Welcome to Vegas, baby.” Bailey hugged me. “Thank you for being here.”

“I wouldn’t miss your engagement party for anything,” I said, stepping inside, stunned with the size of their room.

Bailey’s hands swept wide. “This is the most expensive hotel I’ve ever stayed in.” She reached out and caught my hand in hers, dragging me across the living room. “Come see the hot tub.”

I caught glimpses of plush burgundy furniture as we breezed through. Bright colors mixed with soft tones. A mish-mash of decadence—

A pool table. A movie center. A long marble bar. Enough furniture to furnish a house. This wasn’t just a room.

“This is a suite?” I asked.

“I know!” She squealed.

There, in the corner of the bathroom, sat an enormous sunken bathtub.

“Did you get upgraded?” I said.

Bailey narrowed her gaze. “Don’t think so. You didn’t get us a suite?”

I dragged my gaze from the marble tub and studied her.

She frowned her confusion.

“Bailey, I didn’t get you this,” I said nervously. “I’m sorry. I think it might be a mistake.”

Tara appeared in the doorway. “I was wondering how you could afford all this? Maybe they upgraded us? Did you tell them why we’re here? It might be comped?” She ambled over to the tub and sat on the edge.

Or, I mused, Richard paid for this.

“Let’s just enjoy it and ask questions afterward,” said Tara.

“Don’t hate me, guys,” I said. “Let me just check.”

“Probably a good idea,” said Bailey. “Before you get the bill. I kind of thought it was too good to be true.” She slumped down on the tub beside Tara. “I’m glad I didn’t unpack.”

“Shit,” said Tara. “Thank God we didn’t open the champagne.”

“Give me a second.” I headed back into the living room and found Richard’s number and dialed.

There came the sound of mumbled voices, clinking glasses, and foreign sounding music. Richard sounded like he was in a restaurant having breakfast.

With Jasmine?

My heart nosedived.

“Mia?” said Richard sharply. “Please tell me you’re okay.”

“Of course I’m okay. We were only just talking to each other an hour ago.” I rolled my eyes at Mr. Bossy pants.

“Did you just roll your eyes?” he said.

How does he do that?

I checked behind me to make sure Bailey and Tara couldn’t hear. “No, sir.”

The noise dimmed and it sounded like he’d moved to a quieter spot.

“Where are you?” I asked.

“Jane’s Pancake House.” There came a muffled voice. A man’s, and he was giving his order to a waitress by the sound of it.

“Who are you with?” I said.

“Cameron,” he said. “He sends his best to Bailey and Tara.”

Just hearing his name felt wonderful.

“Are you guys making up for the other day?” I said.

“There’s nothing to make up. We haven’t seen each other in days and we’re having breakfast together. Before we get on the road.”

On the road?

“Did he get us the room?” Tara’s voice piped up.

She made me jump.

Tara stood right behind me, leaning over my shoulder. I raised a hand to let her know I hadn’t asked him yet.

“Richard, did you upgrade their room?” I said.

“I ordered champagne for their room. Is it there?”

My gaze settled on that oversized bottle of Dom Perignon sitting in a bucket of ice.

Tara and Bailey strolled over to the bar and sat on the barstools. Lovingly they stared at that bottle of champagne, as though they’d never seen a thousand dollar bottle before.

I threw them an everything is fine wave. “And you paid for my room too?”

“Surely you don’t have a problem with me treating Tara?”

“You should have asked me first,” I whispered.

“Ask your permission before I give a gift?” He sounded incredulous.

Richard’s generosity made me antsy. Maybe it had something to do with me wanting to gift this to my best friend myself and not have my boyfriend do it.

The suite was pretty fantastic though, and as I watched Bailey and Tara run their hands over the bottle, they didn’t seem to mind.

“Mia?” Richard snapped me out of my dysfunctional musing.

“This is a girl’s weekend,” I said. “You better not be planning on gate crashing.”

“Excuse me?” He gave a long sigh. “Or should I say fuck you.”

There came a shuffle over the phone.

“Mia,” came a deep, cultured voice on the other end. I recognized that pissed off tone from the man who’d just hijacked Richard’s phone. “Glad you arrived safe.”

“Cameron?” My heart leaped.

“Put Tara on, please.”

“How are you?”

“Now, please,” he said.

His authority sent a shiver of pleasure up my spine.

I walked over to them and handed my phone to Tara. “It’s Cameron. He wants to talk with you.”

I gazed longingly at the phone.

Tara pressed it to her ear. “It’s me.” Her frown narrowed, her gaze bouncing from me to Bailey and then back again. “Yes.” She listened some more. “Yes, sir.” She beamed at us when she said that.

I got her attention and mouthed, “What does he want?”

“Got it.” She hung up.

“I hadn’t finished talking with him,” I said.

“Jeez, Mia, you really shouldn’t be so hard on them.” She shrugged. “Your boss is amazeballs.”

Funny how Cameron turns his nose up at the word amazeballs, I mused.

Tara patted Bailey’s back. “We’re under strict orders to make this the best weekend ever.”

“What did he say?” I sensed a shift in Tara’s demeanor.

She rounded the bar and lifted out the bottle of champagne from the cooler. Water dripped from its base onto the black marble counter. “Trust me. You don’t ever want to piss him off.”

“”You’re going to open it?” said Bailey. “But it’s only 10AM!”

“One glass and we’ll save the rest. This place has a fridge.”

“Tara, you didn’t answer my question,” I said nervously.

“This suite is Cameron’s gift to us.”

“Yay,” said Bailey. “Your boss is the best.” She peeled the gold wrapper off the top of the bottle.

“But I wanted it to be from me,” I muttered.

Between them, they managed to navigate that enormous bottle and pour us three glasses without spilling a drop. Tara handed me a champagne flute.

“I wanted to get you your room,” I said, and raised my hand as I made a decision. “I’m getting you both a show. We can take a look at which one you’d like to see and I’ll buy the tickets.”

“Thank you, Mia,” said Bailey. “You don’t have to spend your hard earned money on us.”

“I want to. It makes me happy.”

“To Vegas,” said Bailey, and she took a large gulp.

I sucked in my pride and raised my glass in a toast. “To the best girl’s only weekend ever.”

They lowered their glasses and shared a look.

“What?” I said.

Tara glanced at her watch. “My mom and dad are arriving this afternoon.”

“Oh, I didn’t mean…”

“Let there be no misunderstanding,” said Bailey. “The girls are here to party.”

Tara knocked her drink back. “Watch out Vegas.”

CHAPTER 45

BAILEY LEAPED INTO the air.

She’d just won twenty dollars on a Bellagio slot machine, but from the way she jumped up and down you’d have thought it was thousands. The machine spat out her coins as the light atop it flashed. Tara and I bounced right there beside her, drawing laughter from those around us. Bailey’s joy was too infectious not to share.

We explored the hotel, admiring the colorful display of sculptured glass, which hung from the foyer ceiling. All three of us stood beneath it and gazed up in awe. It was fun to discover the hand-blown flower display was called Fiori di Como, and had been designed by the famous artist Dale Chihuly.

Beneath our feet were pristine marble floors, and around and about were dramatic pillars.

Oberon Grove came to mind.

So much had happened over the last few weeks and I felt I had enough memories to last a lifetime already. Some, like my time in the owlet’s nest, could never be told to anyone. Not even my best friend. Though something told me Tara would not be shocked.

We were surrounded by luxury and it kind of felt odd to also see a casino in such a grand place.

This was like old times. Us three girls hanging out without a care in the world, going from the salon where we had our nails done to window shopping in the designer boutiques to enjoying lunch in Café Bellagio.

In the afternoon, we’d settled by the pool, thankful for sunny climate. Dressed in our bikinis, we hoped to catch a little sun.

We huddled in this private corner near the pool edge, resting on loungers and sharing all our news. Bailey told me about her latest gory adventures in the ER and I told her all about my trip to London.

Tara swam lengths in the sprawling swimming pool, giving Bailey and me the chance to catch up on how their relationship was going. Tara now felt ready to settle down, as did Bailey. Seeing my best friend so happy made everything worth it.

Once they’d come out to Tara’s parents tonight, the plan was to have dinner with them, and then head off to the Strip to go ring shopping. With two engagement rings, it was double the fun, I told her.

“It’s like you’ve found the other half of your star,” I said, recalling Richard telling me that once.

“And you’re happy too?” she said.

“Yes. Things have never been so good.”

“It’s just…”

I rolled over on my lounger to better look at her.

“I just want you to be happy, that’s all,” she said.

“I am. You know how things have been for me. A few months ago I was living in a studio and eating Ramen noodles and now look at me. I can afford to stay here.”

“Just don’t make any rash decisions,” she said.

“Like what?”

“Marrying the wrong guy.”

It felt like my heart had stuttered.

“Sometimes we have to do the right thing,” I muttered.

She peered over her sunglasses. “What does that mean?”

“You have to be there for someone who needs you. Do the right thing.”

She pushed herself up farther. “Mia, why do you always doubt you deserve to be happy?”

It was my turn to look at her over my sunglasses. “How do you mean?”

“Make decisions based on your happiness, not everyone else’s. If you go around trying to please everyone you’ll end up sad and lonely.” She pointed a freshly manicured finger at me. “Everyone is this world is out for themselves. It’s a hard pill to swallow.”

“I don’t believe that,” I said. “Take Cameron. He’s sacrificing so much for his best friend.”

“In what way?”

I slid down the lounger and nudged my glasses back up my nose.

“You two are ridiculous,” she said.

“Why do you say that?”

“Tara says everyone can see how in love you are but you two.”

“I think Richard and I are very affectionate in public,” I said. “No lack of PDA’s for us two.”

“Whatever.”

“What does that mean?”

“I wasn’t talking about Richard.”

My hand flew up in defense. “No one truly knows what’s going on. Not really.”

“I’ve known you a long time, Mia. This is the first time I’ve ever seen you in love.”

“I attended some therapy sessions with Cameron,” I said. “That’s what you’re seeing. A deep connection. Respect. Gratitude.”

“So that’s what we’re calling it now.”

“Richard’s been through too much,” I said. “I could never hurt him.”

“Give him some credit,” she said. “It’s not like he couldn’t get another girl in a heartbeat.”

“I’d break his heart.”

“Saying you love someone is quite different from loving them.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Cameron’s willing to let you go yet Richard’s not.”

“That’s because he needs me.”

“I don’t think that’s it at all. Richard thinks you need him. He’s trying to protect you from the world he’s built up around him. Funny how that works, isn’t it?”

Hurt welled. “You don’t think Richard loves me?”

“He loves you, Mia. He’s just not in love with you. There’s a difference.”

“Why are you being like this?”

She looked sympathetic. “Because you and I have been there for each other from the beginning. We know what it is to drown and we know what it is to fly.”

All this romance had gone to her brain.

The only problem was Richard and I now lived together. Was the home we’d built up around us a lie? Was Winston the only honest one in that Malibu beach house?

Richard had taken my virginity in the garden. Didn’t that count for something? Cameron had nudged us together because we were perfect for each other.

And yet we weren’t.

I could never be Jasmine, bowing down at Richard’s feet every five minutes. I loved being dominated during sex. That was pretty fantastic actually, being held down and fucked senseless, but did I really want to be treated like a woman without an opinion?

It was too late for me. For us.

This roller coaster relationship was secured to its track and there was no getting off.

This is not about you, I reasoned.

And this was not a bad life.

The one man who I loved more than life itself didn’t want me anyway.

Even if just a few days ago we’d cuddled for over an hour in Chrysalis’s basement, holding on in an endless embrace. This was the man with whom my heart lay. Yet Cameron had told me in no uncertain words we would never be.

“I’ve upset you,” said Bailey.

“No, you haven’t. I was just thinking. That’s all.”

“Wanna talk about it?”

I gave a shake of my head and watched Tara trot towards us.

“Let’s get a cocktail,” she said.

Bailey sat up. “Your parents are going to be here in a couple of hours. Let’s not have them thinking I’m a bad influence.”

Tara pulled a face. “I’m starting to freak out.”

“It’s going to be fine,” said Bailey. “Your parents love you. They want you to be happy.”

Tara grazed her lip with her teeth. She didn’t look too convinced.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“My mom’s been bugging me about meeting a nice man and having a baby,” she said. “She’s been going on about how my grandmother had an arranged marriage.”

“Was your mom’s marriage arranged?” I asked.

“No, mom met dad in the orchestra pit,” she said. “Dad shouted at her that she was late for rehearsal and she shouted back at him. Apparently it was love at first sight.”

“So we know where Tara get’s her confidence from,” said Bailey. “Both her parents are A-type personalities.”

And with those words, I suddenly felt worried for Tara.

CHAPTER 46

TARA’S PARENTS WERE impressed with the suite.

I’d poured them both a glass of champagne then Tara, Bailey, and I sat on the couch opposite, nervous as hell and trying not to show it.

Mrs. Razor wore an elegant blue sari, and you could see where Tara got her looks from. Her mom was somewhere in her forties and was so pretty, her cheeks plump, her hair and makeup flawless. Her dad was a little older and he was handsome in a tall, demure, bearded conductor kind of way.

I’d managed to dodge their questions about my job, having told them I was a secretary in a counseling office. Tara nodded her approval. I kept turning the conversation over to Bailey. This was her day after all, and I wanted them to see how incredible she was.

“She’s saving lives every day,” I told them proudly. “And Tara’s following in her footsteps. How perfect is that.”

Bailey tugged on my sleeve, hinting she wanted to talk to me.

After offering a polite gesture to excuse myself, I followed her over to the bar.

“Too much?” I whispered, cringing.

“Don’t hate me,” she said.

“I promise to shut up from here on in.”

“No, that’s not what I meant.”

I frowned at her, trying to work out what she was saying.

“Tara invited down a friend to help with all this,” she said.

“Why would I hate you?”

“Because there’s only one man who can handle something like this and make everything all right.”

I wondered if Tara had a kind uncle who’d be joining us.

Then I realized. “Cameron?”

She swallowed hard, her face full of stress.

I blushed wildly. “In this hotel? Now?”

“And Richard too,” she said. “They came together.”

Get on the road…

Richard had tipped me off and I’d missed it.

A knock at the door shook me out of this stunned state.

“That’s not them?” I whispered, my heartbeat taking off at a rapid rate. “Is it?”

Bailey gave a goofy smile.

Tara answered the door.

Trying not to gape at the two perfect specimens who’d just walked in, my feet stuck to the carpet and all I could muster was a weak wave.

Cameron was dressed in faded jeans and a black shirt and Richard wore jeans too, only his shirt was white. They oozed wealth and success, and I hoped Tara’s parents wouldn’t pick up on their sexual auras that could light up Vegas itself in the event of a power outage.

They emanated playboy.

Mrs. Razor and her husband were just as mesmerized, it seemed, from the way they leaped to their feet and shook hands with these two newly arrived Vegas gods.

Richard came over and flung his arms around me. “This is a nice surprise, right?”

“I’m so happy you’re here,” I said with a squeal.

My brain was trying to catch up.

And my heart was running around the room trying to hide from Cameron’s grin, which was currently on full beam and sending everyone into a swoon.

Room service delivered aperitifs and we all settled on the couches and went from small talk to profound conversation in record time. Mr. Razor looked impressed as Cameron talked about politics and how the republicans needed to lean less right, should they stand any chance of winning the next election. He hid his own political leanings well, offering a diplomatic touch to the conversation.

Richard amused Tara’s mother as he talked about his violin lessons as a child. Apparently, he’d sent Snowy, his pet cat, running each time he’d played. Richard had given up way before mastering the instrument, whereas Mrs. Razor had gone on to become one of America’s most gifted musicians.

Tara’s mom had us laughing as she told us about her learning to play on a Stradivarius, a violin worth millions.

“I’d break those strings every day.” She laughed, her soft accent finding its way through her American. “My teacher would flip out like I’d broken a bone.”

She really could be funny. I loved Tara’s parents and felt sure everything was going to be fine.

The mood had been set. The food consumed. The liquor downed.

From Tara’s wriggling, she was ready.

“Mom,” she said. “I have something wonderful to tell you.”

Her mom’s face lit up and she shared a glance with her husband, hinting she sensed what might be coming.

“I’m engaged,” said Tara. “And I wanted you to be the first to know. Of course. I mean why wouldn’t it be you. I want your blessing. I’m so happy and in love. And this is the most incredible person I could have ever found. I’m in love.”

Mrs. Razor was gazing admiringly over at Cameron.

I’d forgotten how to breath, and from Bailey’s face she had too.

Cameron nudged her on. “Tara.”

Tara reached over and clutched Bailey’s hand.

Tara’s father leaped to his feet. “My darling, girl. I always knew. Always.” His eyes lit up and he held out his arms to her.

“You knew?” Tara leaped to her feet and ran into his embrace.

My heart went out to her mom, whose gaze was jumping from Richard to Cameron and back again.

“Sweetheart.” Her dad gestured to her mom.

Bailey stood and found herself wrapped in Tara’s father’s arms.

“But I don’t…” her mom stuttered.

“Mom, I’m gay,” said Tara. “Bailey and I are engaged to be married.”

“No…no, my darling girl,” said Mrs. Razor. “You’re not. You have to have babies.” She looked up at her husband for support.

“We can still have babies, Momma,” said Tara.

“But what will the family say?” her mom muttered.

There were tears, lots of them, with Cameron drawing on all his skills to get through to Tara’s mom and soften what seemed like a blow.

Tara looked devastated, and I cringed inwardly that her engagement weekend was ruined.

“This is not a choice a person makes,” said Cameron. “Science has proven without a doubt sexuality is decided in the womb. With men, it’s related to the testosterone levels of the mother—”

“So you’re saying it’s my fault my daughter is…”

She refused to say it. Her face filled with grief over the life she’d once imagined for her daughter.

“I’ll be proud to walk you down the aisle, baby girl,” said her dad. “Though I’m not sure…do I walk you both down?” He let out a laugh to ease the tension.

“Look how much they love each other,” said Richard, handing Mrs. Razor another tissue from the box he’d found. “They’re perfect for each other.”

I moved to sit next to Mrs. Razor and wrapped my arms around her shoulder. “What kind of violin do you play now?” I asked.

She wiped away a tear. “A Regina Carter.”

The room hushed as everyone’s eyes fell on me. Mrs. Razor wasn’t the only one wondering where I was taking this.

Except Cameron. He gave me a gesture of support.

“I know a thing or two about artists,” I said. “When you play your violin and you enter the zone, you disappear from the room, don’t you?”

She gave a nod as she dabbed tears from her face.

“You’re in a place that elevates you from everything around. What you channel transcends…”

“Love,” she said.

“Love finds its own way.” I gestured around us. “It transcends all this. Just like the music from your violin is pure, so is Tara’s love. I know this sounds cheesy, but I’m just trying to say I’ve known them both for a long time and their love is pure. Everything that is right with this world is in them.”

Mrs. Razor looked up at Tara. “How long have you been together?”

A lump wedged in my throat.

“A while, momma,” said Tara, tears forming.

Mrs. Razor looked at me then her gaze found Bailey, Richard, and moved on to Cameron, her eyes meeting ours as her mind seemed to try to grasp this.

“You will always be my daughter,” she said. “Just give me some time.”

“I have your blessing then?” said Tara.

“I’ve always liked Bailey,” she muttered. “You’re a lovely young lady, and if you are who my daughter chooses…then…fuck the family. You’re my daughter now.”

We hugged and cheered and a few of us might have cried too. We were relieved the hardest part of this weekend was over.

Tara was out, and I’d never seen her so happy, and my best friend Bailey was getting married.

Tara and Bailey spent the rest of the weekend with her parents. Richard and I gave them the space they needed. Our girl’s weekend had morphed into a couple’s retreat for me and Richard and we really needed it.

Cameron played a little poker that night and later that evening returned to L.A. He had patients waiting for him, Chrysalis to run, and a life that didn’t stop for partying in Vegas, apparently.

As we’d waved him goodbye outside the Bellagio, I’d witnessed the weight of the world descend upon him once again.

My heart ached for him.

His future was hinging on that trial. All I wanted to do was help him through it. Cameron was always going out of his way to save other people. It was time someone saved him.

Someone who knew him better than anyone.

CHAPTER 47

RICHARD WAS ONTO something.

Putting on a snorkeling mask and strapping a tank of oxygen to my back, and settling on Richard’s swimming pool floor really was peaceful. The only sound was muffled water in my ears and the mouthpiece regulator.

I was about to face the biggest challenge of my life and I was in no way ready for it. Cameron’s trial had been pushed forward and was now two days before New Year’s Eve.

A wavering blur appeared above. I was being summoned.

Gently, I kicked myself off the tile floor, rising slowly, blowing all air out just as Richard had taught me so as not to have my lungs explode and render me dead.

My head burst out onto the surface and I grabbed the edge of the pool.

Richard knelt before me. “How’s my girl?”

I eased the mouthpiece out. “Okay.”

“It’s going to be fine, baby. You can do this,” he said. “I’ll be right there with you. Just remember what Dominic told you and everything will be fine.”

The taste of chlorine stung my tongue.

Winston came over and sniffed me. A lick of his lips over my hand was his way of trying to reassure me. He’d sat on my lap last night in the sitting room as Dominic went over what to expect from the trial. Later that night, I’d tossed and turned all the way to morning, too unsettled to sleep.

In a few hours from now it would all be over, and everything would go back to normal. Or so Richard and Dominic had told me.

Richard helped me out of the pool and eased the oxygen tank off my back. After wrapping a plush towel around me, I trudged after him back into the house.

I took a quick shower then dressed in my smart black dress, wanting to make an impression, wanting to pull this off.

During the drive to Westwood, my stomach twisted, and I feared the first thing I’d do was throw up in front of that panel of psychiatrists who were convening over Cameron’s case.

We sat quietly in the lobby, waiting to take the elevator up for our appointment.

I opened my handbag, eased out a small black box, and slipped the engagement ring onto my left ring finger. This oval cut blue sapphire looked like it was worth millions and it caught the light, the diamonds set around it twinkling.

Richard stared down at it. “It looks gorgeous on you.”

It really was stunning, and its snug fit made it feel so right.

Hand in hand, Richard and I strolled into the building, and after checking in with the pleasant receptionist we were told where to wait. We chose the bench pushed up against the wall.

Behind those big wide doors to our right, the trial was in motion. Cameron’s fate as a doctor was being decided.

If I saw Lance or Helete right now, I’d be trying to drown them both myself. Ironically, Cameron was smarter than everyone here, and having spent time with him I’d learned a thing or two. Like a bishop is better than a rook in a chess move.

Life was chess and the master had taught me how to play.

The doors opened and a familiar twenty-something man withdrew. I recognized him as Brian. Although I’d only seen his face once, I knew it was him. Cameron had stopped at his house after picking me up from the tattoo parlor. He’d dropped off a prescription for this sweet young comic book writer, who was afraid to leave the house. Being here would have been a challenge for him.

Cameron really was an amazing doctor.

Dominic strolled out behind him and gave Brian a shake of his hand. Brian didn’t seem to recognize me, but on that day I’d been sitting in Cameron’s car, watching from afar and there’d been no introduction.

Dominic came over.

“How’s it going in there?” asked Richard.

“So far, so good,” said Dominic, watching Brian walk towards the elevator. “Having these kind of clients testify is always a wild card.”

“How do you mean?” I said.

“Some of Dr. Cole’s patients are delusional.”

“How’s Cameron holding up?” asked Richard.

“He’s eager to get out of here,” said Dominic. “He’s flying to Paris tomorrow. If suspended, he plans to stay indefinitely.”

Panic welled within. Not only would patients be losing an amazing doctor, but all of us would be losing a friend.

“Please tell me he won’t be suspended,” I said.

“I’m sure everything will be fine, Mia,” said Dominic, widening his eyes at Richard.

“Oh my God.” Richard leaped to his feet. “Is that…”

I stood too and peeked around his arm to see who he was starting at. My breath caught in my throat.

Henry Cole was strolling towards us with his hands tucked in his pockets in that familiar Cole way, his beard now gone, his suit sharp, and he looked even more handsome than when I’d first seen him.

Henry reached out to shake Richard’s hand. “How are you?” He looked over at me. “Mia, good to see you.”

“Henry?’ Cameron appeared from behind Dominic. “How do you know Mia?”

All eyes settled on me and inwardly I cringed.

Henry approached Cameron.  “Did I miss all the fun? Is it over?”

“What are you doing here?” said Cameron.

“To see you,” said Henry.

“You’re not…you shouldn’t be here,” said Cameron, lowering his voice. “This is a highly stressful situation.”

Henry tucked his hands back into his pockets. “I take offense at that.”

Cameron breathed in a deep inhale of air. “You’re here to testify?”

“Fuck no,” said Henry. “Don’t let any of those shrinks near me.” He smiled my way. “They’re a crazy bunch.” He turned back to Cameron. “I’m here to support my younger brother.”

That firm grip on my left arm was Cameron dragging me away from them. “What the fuck did you do, Mia?”

“Nothing.”

“Did you tell my brother to come here? How did you find him? What the hell are you doing?” Cameron dragged me along farther. “He’s not ready for this.”

“Yes, he is,” I said. “You haven’t seen him in years, so you wouldn’t know. He has stuff he wants to tell you.”

“When did you see him?”

I broke his gaze.

“You’re out of control,” he snapped. “You’re like a fucking tornado decimating everything in its path.”

Tears stung my eyes. “No. Please listen to what Henry has to say.”

Cameron hugged me into his chest. “Oh Mia, you have no idea. It’s not your fault.”

My face was squished against him. “You underestimate me.”

He shook his head, exasperated.

“Are you engaged?” he rasped, staring at my ring. “When?”

“Well—”

Dominic hurried over, grabbed my hand, and pulled me away. “Let’s not be seen harassing the witness, Cole.” He pulled me along. “Mia, they’re ready for you.”

I glanced back at Cameron and he was staring at me, full of worry.

“Go on,” said Dominic, and he gestured for me to go in through those doors.

Henry gave me the thumbs up and Richard made a fist and cheered me on with a smile.

My legs felt unsteady as I entered the great hall, clutching my handbag into my chest.

Sitting before me were four middle aged men behind a long table. They were all dressed suavely, all of them looking super smart. I studied them right back, taking in each one and knowing intellectually these doctors could quite possibly have my head spinning in seconds.

One of the men directed me to sit in the seat positioned before them, a few feet away from their long table. I rested my bag on my lap and glanced right to see Cameron had settled beside Dominic. Files were on the table before them.

Cameron’s kind eyes were full of reassurance, and you’d never have known both of us had been scrapping in the hallway ten seconds ago.

The doors closed behind us.

One by one the doctors introduced themselves and they made small talk, asking where I was from and how I’d come to find myself living in Los Angeles? Calmly, I answered their questions, fully aware they were assessing what I told them and looking for signs of honesty; a foundation for truth that would be soon utilized.

“Cameron once told me ‘God sees the truth but waits’,” I said. “It’s a quote from Tolstoy.”

I wanted them to know I was a reliable witness. A reasonable woman.

“Ms. Lauren, may I call you Mia?” asked the man who’d introduced himself as Dr. Winslow.

“Yes.”

“Tolstoy is considered one of the greatest novelists of our time,” he said. “Have you read any of his books?”

“Anna Kareninia.”

“Do you see Anna in yourself?” asked Dr. Winslow.

“No.” I stared down at my hands, that ring hidden beneath my palm.

“How long have you known Dr. Cole?” asked Dr. Winslow.

“A few months,” I said. “But I knew as soon as I saw him he was a good man. A kind man. He’s wonderful with his patients.”

Dr. Winslow nodded, his gaze sweeping over the papers spread out before him. “Tell me about what happened to you at Chrysalis.”

“How do you mean?” I said.

“We respect this is difficult for you, but as you can see we are trying to understand the complex and radical therapeutic measures Dr. Cole utilities, allegedly.”

“He helped me,” I said.

“In what way?”

Dr. Winslow had a large mole beneath his nose. I imagined he might have been bullied about that as a child. A man who’d gone into psychiatry to perhaps understand the cruelty bestowed on others. The fact he was on this panel reflected the proof he pursued justice above all else.

“Tell me about the dungeon, Mia?” he said.

My gaze shot to Cameron and he averted his eyes. My breathing was rapid, my heart raced, and my hands balled into fists on my lap.

“Mia?” Dr. Winslow pushed.

“He…”

“Yes.”

“The room was dark and he kept it like that,” I said.

It all came flooding back, that soft lighting, that large bed, that chain dangling from my neck preventing my escape. That unfolding passion that stayed with me.

“What happened in the room, Mia?” Winslow’s voice was soft, low.

“He touched me,” I said. “And I liked it.”

“Where did he touch you?”

My face burned brightly and I found it hard to look at them, sensing everyone behind me was waiting on every word, my privacy gone.

“Cameron freed me from my past. Cameron, I mean Dr. Cole, broke me down so he could get to the root cause of my pain.”

Refusing to look at Cameron, I kept my gaze on Dr. Winslow.

Dominic pushed himself to his feet. “Perhaps we could take a short break?”

“Soon,” said Dr. Winslow, gesturing for Dominic to take his seat again. “Please, Mia, go on. Did Dr. Cole ever use violence against you?”

“He spanked me,” I said. “And once…”

A nod for me to continue.

“He used a bullwhip,” I said. “Do you know what that is?”

A shared nod from behind the table.

“I liked that too,” I said. “It actually clears your head and makes it easier to think. Cameron says it’s because of the release of adrenaline in your blood. It floods your brain with endorphins.”

Hushed whispers rose from behind me.

The doctors whispered between each other, conferring. A shake of heads, a look of worry, swapped glances of concern.

“Mia, was there ever a time Dr. Cole penetrated you?” said Winslow.

“How do you mean?” I asked, purposefully dragging out the stupid question.

“Was there intercourse?” he said.

“Yes,” I said, blushing. “Lots of it. He’s amazing in bed. Please don’t write that down. It’s kind of personal.”

The men threw Cameron a weary glance.

Cameron looked pale.

“Mia, how long have you been a patient of Dr. Cole’s?” asked Dr. Winslow.

“Um…” I thought about it, turning in my seat to see Richard.

He gave me a wink that this was going well.

I turned back to face them, forcing myself to make eye contact with Dr. Winslow.

Cameron’s head was bowed, his eyes lowered.

“Mia?” Winslow drew me back to him.

“Sorry?” I said.

“How long have you been a client of Dr. Cole?”

“I was never one of Dr. Cole’s patients.”

“Excuse me?” said Winslow.

I raised my left hand in the air and flashed that blinding sapphire. “I’m his fiancé. We’re engaged to be married.”

Dr. Winslow frowned, his hands ruffling through his papers.

I poked into my handbag, pulled out my sunglasses, and put them on. “I mean look at that bling. It’s gorgeous.”

With my eyes concealed, these fine minds wouldn’t see my windows to the truth.

“I think there’s been some misunderstanding,” said Dr. Winslow, looking puzzled.

“I can only imagine,” I said. “And I think that’s where this rumor started. There are people out there envious of what Cameron and I have. We’ve never been happier.” I turned my hand around to admire the way the light caught the sapphire.

I beamed at Cameron.

Cameron’s mouth gaped, but he quickly regained composure.

“Is this true?” asked Dr. Winslow.

“It is,” said Richard. “I can vouch for them. I’m Cole’s best friend.”

Cameron whispered into Dominic’s ear. Dominic motioned for Cameron to remain quiet.

More questions, a shuffling of papers. A slow kind of chaos unfolded all around. Some wore embarrassed expressions, while others were full of relief.

I was led away by Richard, out into the hallway.

He gave me a hug. “My little minx.”

“Think they believed me?” I whispered.

“Yes. Looks like it’s over.”

“What about Lance?”

“Cameron’s slapped him with a defamation lawsuit,” he said.

Henry came over and gave me a hug. “You had me scared there for a minute, Mia.”

“All I care about is that Cameron’s name is cleared,” I said.

“It is now,” said Henry, pointing to my ring. “Where did you get that shiner?”

“Borrowed it,” said Richard.

Dominic and Cameron joined us in the hallway and I tried to read Cameron’s expression. Dominic still had a stunned look on his face.

Cameron’s serenity had returned, but that frown he’d reserved for his brother hadn’t lifted.

“Escort her out,” whispered Richard, gesturing to me.

With my hand in Cameron’s, we stepped into the elevator and Richard and Henry joined us. Dominic still had some administration to do and stayed behind.

A few floors down, we all breathed a sigh of relief.

We walked out into the underground parking and all huddled in a corner.

“What was that?” snapped Cameron.

“Don’t start,” said Richard.

“She just lied to a panel of psychiatrists,” whispered Cameron, finally letting go of my hand.

“I didn’t take an oath,” I said. “No laws were broken.”

Henry turned to Cameron “Oh shut the fuck up, Cam.”

Cameron had never looked so frazzled.

“I hear you have a nice place in Venice Beach?” said Henry.

“I do,” said Cameron.

Henry smiled at him. “Perhaps you can teach me to surf?”

Cameron swallowed hard.

“Or not,” said Henry.

“I’d love to,” said Cameron. “I mean…yes. Yes. Of course.”

“How about now?” said Henry.

Cameron blinked at him.

“Let’s go buy me a board. Know a great surf shop?” Henry winked at me.

“Are you planning on taking over Cole Tea?” asked Richard.

Cameron flashed him an uneasy glance.

“Hell no,” said Henry. “But between Cam and I, I’m sure we can persuade Dad to let Willow run the empire. It’s time we had a woman in the driver’s seat. What do you say, Cole?”

“Quite agree,” said Cameron, his gaze drifting to mine. “We’ve underestimated her for quite some time. I’ve been such an ass.”

“Time to make up for it,” said Henry. “This surf shop better sell swimming trunks. Don’t want to put on a show for the locals.”

CHAPTER 48

THIS WOULD BE my first time visiting Palm Springs.

A perfect way to see in the New Year. We’d decided to celebrate it privately, just us two, and we’d booked a room at the Viceroy Hotel.

Driving along the Pacific Coast highway in Richard’s BMW, I took in the ocean view. I’d kicked off my shoes and now rested my bare feet with their pink painted toenails up on the dashboard. My hands rested in my lap to keep my short red summer dress from flying up. From all this sunshine, you’d never have guessed it was winter in Los Angeles.

Richard pushed the car into fifth gear.

“You were very brave yesterday,” he said. “All charges have been lifted and Cameron’s free to continue practicing medicine.”

“You were very kind,” I said. “Letting me see my plan through. I knew it would all turn out fine as long as I kept my nerve.”

“I’m glad that’s over,” he said.

“Me too.”

I imagined Cameron would be celebrating in his own way, dining on a fine meal in Paris, before heading off to check on his club in the Rive Gauche. I had no right to jealousy. Cameron deserved to be happy more than anyone.

It was easier not to linger there.

We drove off the highway and turned onto Montana Avenue. I looked over at him, wondering where we were heading. This was meant to be the scenic route.

“One stop,” he said, turning off the music.

Richard killed the engine.

We’d parked outside Bloomfield’s jewelry store. I realized Richard was returning the engagement ring.

He turned in his seat to look at me. “Is there something you’ve been keeping back from me, Mia?”

“How do you mean?”

He let out a long sigh. “You wrote to my dad?”

I broke his gaze.

“I got a letter from him.”

“What did he say?”

Richard looked solemn. “Some people never change, Mia. No matter how much you want them to. No matter how much we believe they can.”

“Is he going to do the right thing?”

He gave a shrug. “I vowed we’d never talk again.”

“I’m sorry. I really believed if he knew what an incredible man you are he’d change his ways. Maybe return those hidden funds. That way no one could threaten you ever again.”

Richard looked at me with sympathy.

“Did I mess up?’ I said.

“Your heart was in the right place. It always was and always will be. I’ll be right back.” He climbed out of the car and went inside.

It seemed I’d been holding my breath for the longest time, but at least Richard understood my motive. Maybe his father would come round one day and do the right thing.

I brought out my iPhone and shot off a text to Bailey, telling her I missed her and letting her know about my new adventure, and wanting to know about hers. Turning over my phone, I lovingly ran my fingers over Hello Kitty.

Richard came out of the store and lingered on the steps. He stared at something in his palm. His ocean blue gaze rose to greet me.

A few moments later and he’d hurried down and rejoined me in the car.

“Everything okay?” I said.

He stared dead ahead, his hand clutching something.

“What is that?” I said.

He opened his palm. “I got it fixed.”

My bracelet. The one Cameron had given me that first day I’d visited his house. The same one Richard had accidently snapped on the plane.

Cautiously, I looked up at him.

Richard fiddled with the catch, his fingers moving delicately over it before securing the bracelet back onto my left wrist. “It looks beautiful on you.”

“Thank you.” I twisted my arm and admired the sparkling diamonds. “It’s okay to keep it?”

“Cameron has wonderful taste,” he said. “But we already knew that.”

I gave a wary smile.

“Did you know there’s an engraving on it?”

“There is?” I peered down at the bracelet. “Really?”

He looked back at Bloomfield’s. “The store owner just told me. It’s actually invisible to the human eye. You can only see it through a jewel gem microscope.”

“What does it say?”

Richard brought out his cell and busied himself with a text. “Choose us some music.” He tucked his phone back into his pocket.

“Who did you text?” I asked.

“I’m making sure when we get to our destination everything will be set.”

“That hotel’s lovely,” I said. “Can we go in the pool?”

“For you, anything.”

We pulled away from the curb and we headed back down Montana.

“Did we forget something?” I said.

“One more stop,” said Richard.

We were driving back along the Pacific Coast highway.

We were heading home.

Not that long ago I’d lived around here, with its long stretch of Malibu beach houses. One of which I’d rented for the lowest price ever, considering it was right on the sand. Though later, I’d discovered it belonged to Cameron.

My gaze shot to Richard’s when he parked outside the place I’d once called home. A cozy condo right on the beach.

“Why are we here?”

He turned the engine off and stared at his hands. “We’ve been lying to ourselves for far too long.”

Tears stung my eyes. “What are you saying?”

“I can’t.”

“Can’t what?” I stared at the bracelet. “Do you want me to take it off?”

His hand rested on mine. “You’re a crappy sub, Mia,” he said. “I’ve tried to get you to understand the kind of woman I need. I told you that the first day we were here. That I needed a well trained sub. This can’t come as a surprise?”

My throat constricted. “Are you…”

“Yes, I am.”

“But it’s New Year’s eve?” I said. “What about Palm Springs?”

“I refuse to go into another year lying to myself. Or lying to you.”

I swallowed my fear. “I’ll try harder.”

“It’s not that.”

“Is it because I wrote to your dad?”

“No, Mia. It’s got nothing to do with that.”

“Was it Hope’s visit that’s made you feel different?”

“Yes and no. It wasn’t exactly her, but it reminded me how much I gave up for Emily. How I compromised what I wanted. I know it sounds selfish, but you’re just not cutting it, Mia. In fact as far as a sub goes, you’re crap.”

I slapped my hand to my mouth.

“Please don’t,” he said. “You must know this? Your orgasm training was a disaster.”

“It wasn’t exactly easy,” I said. “Maybe I should go down on you five times a day and see how you don’t manage to come.”

He gave me a look of I told you so.

I slunk in the seat.

“I feel proud to have been part of the influence that’s seen you grow into such an incredible woman.”

“I can’t live without you,” I burst out.

“Yes, you will and can. You’ll thrive, Mia. You’ll find happiness and you’ll meet the one. Have babies and live happily ever after.”

“You don’t know that,” I said. “We were going to Palm Springs.” And then I realized. “Jasmine?”

“Take it or leave it, baby.” He gave a long sigh. “Though having a supermodel bow before me is quite the rush.”

Why did he have to say that?

He raised his hand in defense. “Nothing happened. I promise.”

“Are you going to take her on as your new sub?”

“Undecided,” he said. “She really needs someone right now.”

“You’re having an affair?”

“No, we’re not. I just want you to know I’m going to be okay, Mia. As are you. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. I’m not like Cameron. I don’t have a knack for words.”

“You do. I love the way you talk.” Drawing strength from his hand on mine, I knew he was right. I’d fallen in love with the idea of him, with his confidence, his kindness, his desire to protect me, and with a life that promised to rescue me from mine.

Staring at that Malibu Beach house, I wondered if it still had all the old furnishings. I’d enjoyed living there, even though it hadn’t lasted that long.

“Is this goodbye?” I said, holding back an ugly cry.

“Doubt it. You’re a member of the pervy club now so I’m sure I’ll see you around.” He winked at me.

A wink! He was sending me packing and he’d tried to inject humor into this. It was best I didn’t talk. A waterfall of tears pressed against my eyes.

“Okay,” I managed and opened my door.

He met me around the other side of the car and handed me a set of keys. “Stay here for as long as you like until you decide what you want to do.”

We hugged, and it was the embrace I should have given him all these weeks, nuzzling into his chest and letting him know how much I wanted to be there for him.

I should have done more. Been more.

But it was too late.

“Call me if you ever need anything?” he said. “I know a great locksmith if you ever get trapped in a pair of handcuffs.”

“Silly.” I punched his arm. “I’m going to head on up.”

I took my bag from him and made those few short steps to the front door.

“Mia,” he called after me.

I turned and held his gaze, fearing I’d crumble into an inconsolable mess.

Had he changed his mind?

I held my breath.

“You really did save me,” he said. “I’ll always be grateful to you for that. You know that right? I was weeks away from…” He let his eyes say the rest.

“You’re not going to…”

“No, not now. Not after you. After all you’ve given me. You’ve shown me that life does indeed go on. That there’s something to live for.”

His words comforted me a little.

“The hardest part of all this is breaking it to Winston,” he said. “I’ve never seen him so head over heels.”

I forced a reassuring smile and faced the door again, shoving the key in the lock.

“Thank you for not making a scene,” he said.

I gave a nod and headed on in.

Once safely on the other side, I threw down my bag, slid down the door, and hugged my knees.

This place felt as empty as my heart.

CHAPTER 49

THERE WAS A CHARDONAY in the fridge.

Cracking this open was a damn good start to my new life and seeing the New Year in. Other than that, the fridge was empty, so it was a small mercy.

I couldn’t believe Richard had done this. I’d sat by the door for the last half hour running through every aspect of our relationship and cringing with all the obvious failures I’d made, now rearing their obviousness with glaring intensity. The curse of retrospect.

We’d been a bit of a mish-mash, our personalities clashing, and me not able to truly fit into his ideal. Though his final words that it had not been all bad soothed me.

I reached into the fridge and brought out the wine, opened it, and poured myself a large glass. Pulling up a chair at the central kitchen counter, I sat down and took several refreshing gulps. That fridge over there had been a gift from ‘the girls’ and both Richard and Cameron, when I’d first moved in here. I liked that fridge. Maybe I could take it with me. It was mine after all.

At least Richard had not dropped me off at a hotel. I’d have time to find a new job, a new home, and get my life back on track.

I took three more gulps.

I knew Cameron wouldn’t mind me being here, though I still had to face him after he found out about this. Resting my face in my hands, I sucked in a sob.

And then another.

Holding back tears, I refused to believe my life was taking a nosedive. Look at the bright side, I mused, it’s been one hell of an experience and you really do have a brighter future because of all this.

I kicked off my shoes.

Wanting to sit on something more comfortable than a barstool, I padded into the sitting room towards that plush cream colored couch. When I’d first lived here I’d been scared to sit on it for the first few days for fear of leaving a stain. Now I realized, as I sunk into it, life was messy, imperfect, full of twist and turns and bound to leave a mark, and considering everything I’d be through I’d come out pretty well.

I set my glass down on the central table and climbed onto the couch and bounced up and down. The springs were springy.

When that failed, I lay down on it.

Nope, I got up and threw the cushions off the couch, high into the air and across the room, managing to miss my glass and not knock over my wine. This burst of aggression felt good.

Flushed from all this bouncing, lying down, and throwing, I strolled over to the balcony door to look out at the view.

The catch was open.

Well that’s not good. Anyone could have just wandered up here and come in. I slid open the door and peered down at the balcony floor and saw a pair of flip flops, and by the size of them they belonged to a man.

Freaking out, I counted the steps back to the kitchen where my iPhone was tucked away inside my handbag.

My gaze rose towards the sand and settled on the ocean. A man was swimming and he was cutting through the water with impressive speed.

Could it be?

But he’s in France.

Go back inside and have another drink and stop seeing what you want to see.

My feet ignored my brain as they carried me out onto the balcony.

Barefoot, I made my way down the steps until my feet sunk in golden sand, tickling my toes.

Moving closer to the water’s edge, my eyes strained to make out who was swimming. A neighbor? I looked back up at the condo, realizing the evidence lay inside had I only explored the place further.

I turned back to face the water.

Cameron stood waist deep, waves lashing around him, his stare locked on mine with equal intensity.

I ran to him…

Splashing my way in and then wading farther until I was up to my waist.

He met me halfway.

“Richard doesn’t want me any more,” I burst out. “I’m not a very good sub.”

“I disagree,” he said. “You just require the appropriate handling.”

My legs wobbled and that delicious rush made my cheeks flush wildly.

He grinned at me.

“You’re here,” I stated the obvious. “You’re not in France.”

He nodded, his eyes blinking off sea water.

“What’s engraved on my bracelet?” I asked.

He looked surprised then his eyes lowered to it.

“The jeweler told Richard there’s writing on it,” I said. “Only he didn’t tell me what.”

Cameron turned slightly and his focus settled on the horizon.

“Please tell me,” I said.

“It says I will always love you.”

A sob caught in my throat.

The day he’d given it to me we’d not yet made love.

“Say it,” I pleaded. “Say the words.”

“I just did.”

“No, say it to me like you’re not reading it off my bracelet.”

“Technically it’s my bracelet.” He shrugged. “As it’s on your wrist.”

I demanded to hear it, stomping my foot in protest and losing my balance, going under the water. There came a rushing in my ears, water up my nose, and I pursed my lips.

He lunged forwards and caught me, sweeping me up into his arms and pulling me into a hug.

Cameron carried me, wading towards dry land.

“That’s you saving me again,” I muttered, and pressed my cheek against his warm, wet chest.

He bent his head to kiss me. “So it is.”

“You need a girlfriend who is also your sub.”

“I quite agree. However, I have one stipulation, Mia.”

“What’s that?”

“She must agree to a permanent contract.”

“Like forever?”

“That’s what permanent means, yes.”

I pouted at him.

Cameron lowered me to my feet on the sand and took my hands in his. “You didn’t say yes.”

My heart stuttered. “Yes, please. When?”

“Right now. If you fail to call me, sir.”

I looked up at him. “Sir.”

“Much better.”

“It’s New Year,” I said, wistful.

“A new life.”

Staring into his gaze, my heart had found its way home.

“Mia Lauren?”

“Yes?”

“I love you so much. I’ve always loved you. From the moment I laid eyes on you. And I always will. You’re everything I could’ve dreamed of and more.”

“I love you, Cameron Cole.”

He bruised my lips with his, tongue searching, lavishing affection, protecting.

Finally he broke away. “My sweet, sweet, Mia. You are enthralling.”

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Vanessa Fewings is the award-winning author of the Enthrall Sessions.

Vanessa is also the author of The Stone Masters Vampire Series, a paranormal saga.

Her romantic comedy, Piper Day's Ultimate Guide to Avoiding George Clooney, has already garnered a buzz of excitement from readers around the world. Prior to publishing, Vanessa worked as a registered nurse and midwife. She holds a Masters Degree in Psychology. She has traveled extensively throughout the world and has lived in Germany, Hong Kong, and Cyprus.

Born and raised in England, Vanessa now proudly calls herself an American and resides in California with her husband.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Thank you, Amy Schiffman, the most incredible literary manager a girl can have.

Louise Bohmer, friend and amazing editor, I’m so lucky to have your Zen and expertise. My deepest gratitude to my entertainment attorney, Uri Fleming. You truly are a knight in shining armor.

As always, I’m so grateful to my dear family and friends Diane Eadie, Debbie Stone, Mary McCarville, Liz, and Cheryl. You cheer me on and your support is never taken for granted.

Thank you, Steve Jansen, for your inspiration and allowing me to mention your beautiful piece of music, “Captured In A Quiet Window.”

I’m so blessed to have the kind support of Christine Christmann, Marla Brown, and Shelly Knox Jimenez, as well as all the other amazing reviewers over at Books and Beyond Fifty Shades. You help make the release of a novel so incredibly fun and I’m forever grateful. Thank you, Summer Daniels, over at What to Read After Fifty Shades of Grey.

Hazel Jones Godwin from Craves the Angst Book Reviews, Louise from Seraphim Reviews, and Rosanna Albani, you were all with me right from the start with the release of the first novel Enthrall. I appreciate all your kindness and everything you do.

Thank you, Abra Neville, for lending your remarkable talent as the voice of Mia Lauren in the audiobook series of the Enthrall Sessions. You’ve truly captured her essence.

Sue Quiroz, you’re such an inspiration.

Thank you to Becky Carter Nichols and Nicole Andrews Moore over at Stories and Swag Tours. I always enjoy our online release parties and want them to go on forever.

Thank you so much to the dream team, Rosette Doyle, Michelle Eck, and Karen Everett, at Literati Author Services, Inc. Your expertise and hard work are always appreciated. You guys rock!

For all the bloggers and reviewers who are sharing the news of Enthrall Him, I’m forever grateful. You really are the reason readers find our books and we couldn’t do this without you.

To my social media friends, thank you for your kindness and support. It means the world to me.

For my husband, Brad, my everything. Life with you is magical.

Table of Contents

- CHAPTER 1
- CHAPTER 2
- CHAPTER 3
- CHAPTER 4
- CHAPTER 5
- CHAPTER 6
- CHAPTER 7
- CHAPTER 8
- CHAPTER 9
- CHAPTER 10
- CHAPTER 11
- CHAPTER 12
- CHAPTER 13
- CHAPTER 14
- CHAPTER 15
- CHAPTER 16
- CHAPTER 17
- CHAPTER 18
- CHAPTER 19
- CHAPTER 20
- CHAPTER 21
- CHAPTER 22
- CHAPTER 23
- CHAPTER 24
- CHAPTER 25
- CHAPTER 26
- CHAPTER 27
- CHAPTER 28
- CHAPTER 29
- CHAPTER 30
- CHAPTER 31
- CHAPTER 32
- CHAPTER 33
- CHAPTER 34
- CHAPTER 35
- CHAPTER 36
- CHAPTER 37
- CHAPTER 38
- CHAPTER 39
- CHAPTER 40
- CHAPTER 41
- CHAPTER 42
- CHAPTER 43
- CHAPTER 44
- CHAPTER 45
- CHAPTER 46
- CHAPTER 47
- CHAPTER 48
- CHAPTER 49
- AUTHOR BIO