Date: 2014-12-02 05:00:00+00:00
Keywords: Dark; Romance; Abuse; Suspense; Contemporary; New Adult

ALL I NEED

A companion novel to Stay

Emily Goodwin

All I Need
by Emily Goodwin

Copyright © Emily Goodwin 2014

All Rights Reserved

Edited by Taylor K’s Editing Services

Cover art by Regina Wamba of Mae I Design

Formatting by Kody Boye

This book is a work of fiction. People, places, events, and situations are the product of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or historical events, is purely coincidental.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author and publisher.

Other books by Emily Goodwin:

The Guardian Legacies Series:

Unbound

Reaper

Moonlight (2015)

The Contagium Series:

Contagious

Deathly Contagious

Contagious Chaos

The Truth is Contagious

Beyond the Sea Series:

Beyond the Sea

Red Skies at Night (2015)

Tease Me Novella Series:

Tease Me

Tempt Me

Take Me

Dark Romance Standalones:

Stay

To Gabrielle

Who wanted a book dedicated
just to her. Love you, sis.

Trigger Warning: This book contains rape, abuse, sexual assault, violence, and strong language.

Author’s Note:

Before I wrote ALL I NEED, I wrote STAY. While ALL I NEED can be read as a standalone, I highly recommend reading STAY first.

The idea of STAY came to me in a dream. I didn’t know a lot about human trafficking at the time, so I started doing research and was horrified by what I had learned. I spoke with two FBI agents about trafficking, which was a very eye-opening experience.

One thing I hope you understand is that fear controls the victims. There may be opportunities that seem ideal for escaping or calling for help that are not taken because the fear of getting hurt or having loved ones hurt is so deep. Chances are not taken because the victims are so terrified and beaten down.

Human trafficking is a real issue. It happens everywhere, even quiet, “safe” little towns like the one I live in. The more I researched, the more horrified I became. There are more slaves today than there were 100 years ago. The average age of sex trafficked victims is 13-14. Trafficking victims have a life expectancy of two years. 100,000 to 300,000 people are trafficking in the United States every year. Girls as young as five have been forced into child prostitution. Every thirty seconds, someone becomes a victim of human trafficking.

I didn’t set out to raise awareness or to be preachy about the issue of trafficking, but I do hope you can take away the fact that this isn’t an issue that should be ignored. There is only a supply of slaves because there is a demand.

CHAPTER ONE

Seventeen years ago

The glass plate shattered as it hit the wall, breaking into a million tiny pieces that rained down onto the dingy living room carpet. My fork fell from my hand, and my macaroni and cheese splattered onto my lap. I leapt off my chair and ran into the living room, diving under the coffee table.

It was my hiding spot; the place where I had gone time after time whenever Mom and Dad got into it… which was basically every day. Sometimes more than once a day. The carpet wasn’t as worn and dirty under here, and I was safe—for the most part—from being hit with whatever Dad grabbed and threw.

I covered my ears with my hands and squeezed my eyes shut. My dark hair fell into my face and my heart pounded. I wanted to be somewhere else. Anywhere else. I pulled my knees to my chest, praying Dad wouldn’t see me.

“I work all day while you just sit on your lazy ass!” Dad yelled at Mom.

Mom swung around, a beer bottle in her hand. “Don’t you dare call me lazy!” She threw her hand out, pointing to my empty spot at the table. She hadn’t even realized I was no longer there. “I take care of Jackson! He’s only six. Do you know what a handful boys that age are?” She put the bottle to her lips and took a long drink. “I don’t see you watching him!”

Dad’s nostrils flared. “Why should I? I didn’t want him. You should have gotten that fucking abortion like I wanted and none of this would be happening! You wanted him so you take care of him!” He cast his blue eyes to the floor, finding me immediately. I cowered under the coffee table, my hands shaking. Dad took a drag from his cigarette and then dropped it into Mom’s beer.

“Hey!” she yelled. “I wasn’t finished with that, asshole!”

“Don’t call me an asshole, bitch!” Dad shoved Mom. She stumbled back, beer sloshing down her hand. The bottle fell, crashing to the floor and breaking into sharp shards. The glass crunched under Dad’s work boots as he crossed the living room. He grabbed Mom by the shoulders and shook her.

“You need to learn to respect me, woman!” He slapped her across the face.

“Lex!” she screamed as she swatted at him. “Stop it! Stop! Not in front of Jackson!” Dad moved his hands to Mom’s throat.

“Stop it, Daddy!” I screamed. Mom’s eyes met mine, pleading. I reached for her, tears blurring my vision. Mom made a strangled noise of pain. Teeth chattering with fear, I crept out from under the coffee table. “Daddy!” I called and put my hand on his shoulder.

Dad turned around and his hand hit me square in the jaw. I stumbled back, crying as I fell. My teeth bit down on my tongue and blood filled my mouth. It dripped down my chin, mixing with saliva, and staining my favorite Spiderman t-shirt.

I rolled onto my side, bringing my knees to my chest. I screamed for Mom, but Dad was still pushing her onto the ground. Tears streamed down my cheeks, collecting in little puddles on the floor. Through my blurry vision I saw Mom grab something and hit Dad with it. He pulled away and blood dripped down his face, too.

He raised his hand, with fingers balled into a fist, and hit Mom three times before he got up and stormed through the apartment. The floor vibrated with each step. I closed my eyes, my body shaking from the force of my tears.

The door slammed shut. I shuddered as I inhaled, the taste of pennies in my mouth making me feel sick.

“Jackson,” Mom whimpered as she crawled over. I opened my eyes long enough to see her. Her right eye was swollen and already bruising. She wiped blood off of her split lip. She extended a shaky hand and pulled me to her. I pushed up and threw my arms around my mother.

“It’s okay,” she cried. “Tomorrow, we’re leaving. Just the two of us.” She ran her hand over my hair. It was black and wavy, just like hers. “We’ll go somewhere far away and start over, okay?” I nodded, hiccupping a sob. She sat there for a few minutes, rocking me back and forth until I stopped crying. “Come on, baby. Let’s go to bed.”

Mom pushed herself up and helped me to my feet. She held onto my hand as we walked through the small apartment and into the bathroom. She turned on the sink and sat on the toilet, waiting for the water to warm up.

“Brush your teeth, baby,” she said, sniffling back tears.

I nodded and got my toothbrush. The toothpaste stung my bleeding tongue. My spit was red. I watched it swirl down the drain, mixed with globs of bubblegum-flavored toothpaste.

Mom wet a washcloth and gently cleaned the blood off my face. “We’re going to have to cover this up tomorrow,” she said to herself. “Don’t need nobody asking you about it at school.”

I nodded. I knew not to talk about the times when Dad got mad. I knew to wear long sleeves, even when it was hot outside. Mom said they might take me away otherwise. I didn’t want that. Mom and Dad might scream and fight, but  they loved me. They were my parents. They had to love me.

Mom washed the blood and makeup off her face before taking me into the bedroom. There was only one bedroom in the small apartment. Mom and Dad slept on the bed, and I slept on a cot on the floor under the window.

“Give me your shirt,” Mom said. “I’ll rinse it in the sink to get the blood out.”

I pulled the red and blue Spiderman shirt over my head and threw it to her, a small smile pulling up my lips. Mom caught it and turned, going back into the bathroom. I took off my pants and crawled onto my cot wearing only my underwear. In between the cot and the wall is where I kept my toys.

“Mom says we’re leaving tomorrow,” I told my stuffed dragon, Pedro. “Don’t worry. I’m taking you with me.” I tucked him under my arm and pulled my blanket up to my chin as I laid down.

I was excited to leave with Mom tomorrow. Where would we go? There were so many exciting places! I’d heard her talk about Chicago, where she was born. I closed my eyes, thinking of the times I’d seen Chicago in movies. I imagined gangsters and lots of adventures for Mom and me.

Mom came back into the bedroom with another bottle in her hand. It wasn’t a beer. The bottle was bigger and the liquid was clear. She leaned against the doorway, chugging it down. She shuddered, closing her eyes. Why would anyone drink something that tasted gross?

Once, Jeremy Mitchell dared me to drink an expired carton of milk we found behind a table in the lunchroom. It was the grossest thing I’d ever tasted. I only drank half before I threw it up all over the lunch table.

Mom set the bottle down and wobbled into the room. She opened the top drawer of her dresser and pulled out a plastic bag of green stuff. She opened the bag and sniffed it before she turned to leave.

“Mom?” I asked. “Aren’t you gonna read me a bedtime story?”

Mom blinked. “I’ll be back before you know it. Then I’ll read you a story. Maybe two.”

I smiled. “Okay, Mom.” I put Pedro aside and reached under Mom and Dad’s bed. I kept my books under there. They were safe there, out of the way from being thrown. Books, even the ones with floppy paper covers, hurt when Dad threw them at me.

I picked out two books for Mom to read, setting them on her spot of the bed. I tucked myself back under the covers and waited.

And waited.

And waited some more until I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer and fell asleep.

Mom was passed out on the couch when I woke up that next morning. Dad never came home. I sat up and grabbed Pedro, scared to venture any further into the living room. Sometimes Mom looked dead. I would shake her and shake her and she wouldn’t wake up.

I used to cry, grab Pedro and a book, and then hide under the coffee table. Or turn on the game system and play… if the TV was working. Now I waited, and if Mom didn’t wake up soon enough, I’d go across the hall to Mrs. Baranoski’s apartment. She didn’t speak English, but her brown eyes were warm and she always gave me cookies.

Mom looked extra dead that morning. She was face down on the couch with sticky vomit in her hair. The bag of green stuff was empty, and the bottle of clear liquid laid on its side on the floor.

I knew Dad would get angry if he saw the mess. I picked up the bottle and the empty bag, carrying them into the small kitchen. I dumped what was left in the bottle down the sink and threw it in the garbage.

With Pedro under my arm, I opened the fridge and got blasted with a nasty smell. I closed my eyes and wrinkled my nose.

“Something is rotting,” I told Pedro and curiously looked for the source. “Maybe it’s a zombie!” I had stayed up late watching a zombie movie with Dad not that long ago… well kind of. He sat on the couch drinking beers while falling asleep and then waking back up again while I sat hidden in a corner the entire time. It wasn’t my bedtime yet, but Dad didn’t like me to be around him when he got home from work. It was too stressful, he would say.

I let out a breath as I looked inside the refrigerator. There were no zombies, but there also wasn’t much else. The bottom shelf was full of Mom and Dad’s “big kid drinks”. I wasn’t allowed to have those.

I closed the fridge and dragged a chair over to the counter. I climbed up onto it—it was the only way I could reach the cabinet—and grabbed a jar of peanut butter. I lost my balance on my way down. My foot slipped off the chair. My eyes widened and I knew I was going to fall.

The jar of peanut butter flew from my hand, clattering down onto the floor at the same time as I landed from the fall. My head whacked against the floor. I cried out in pain, calling for Mom.

She never came.

I pushed myself up, drying my tears, and got the peanut butter. My head hurt so bad it made my ears ring. Sniffling a sob, I got a spoon out of the drawer and went back to the living room.

“Mom,” I cried, setting the jar and spoon on the coffee table. “Mommy! I fell and hurt my head.” She didn’t even move. “Mommy!” Tears splattered down onto her. “Mommy!”

Her skin was cold. My lip quivered, but I turned away. She would wake up. She had to. She was my mom, and she wouldn’t leave me here.

I turned on cartoons and sat on the floor, leaning against the couch while I ate spoon full after spoon full of peanut butter. My throat was dry and my mouth felt sticky. I wished I had a juice box, like the kids at school drank for lunch. Instead, I picked a dirty cup out of the sink and filled it with water.

I went back in the living room, flipping through channels and waiting for Mom to wake up. An hour later, I was ready to go across the hall. Right as I grabbed Pedro, the door to the apartment opened. Dad stepped in, swaying on his feet.

I smiled. “Hi, Daddy!”

His blue eyes narrowed. “What the fuck are you doing home?” My face fell. What was Dad talking about? “You should be in school. What, did you forget how to walk to school?”

Tears pooled in my eyes. I hugged Pedro to my chest and cast my eyes down. Oh, right. School. How did I forget that? I must be stupid like Dad says.

Dad bent over, unlacing his boots. From across the room, I could smell the smoke coming off of his clothes. He glanced up at me. “Don’t start that crying bullshit. You’re a boy. Boys don’t cry.”

I sucked back a sob and nodded. Dad muttered under his breath and took off his boots, throwing them across the room. He stumbled when he stood, throwing his arms out to keep his balance. He crossed the living room. His breath smelled like the clear liquid Mom liked to drink.

“Amber,” Dad grumbled. “Amber.”

“She’s sleeping,” I said, my voice thin. “I can’t wake her up.”

Dad stopped short. “God dammit, Jackson,” he bellowed. Dad only said my name when he was angry with me. I hugged Pedro tighter. He bent over, picking up the TV remote. “You got peanut butter all over the remote! Go clean it up. Now!”

I nodded but was too scared to move. Maybe if I stayed really still, Dad would forget I was there.

“Jackson!” he yelled. Staying still didn’t work. “Look at me!”

He rushed forward and suddenly was right in front of me. He reached out and grabbed my arm, his fingers digging into my flesh. He twisted his hand, painfully pulling my skin. Slowly, I looked up at Dad, holding my eyes open as wide as I could to keep the tears away.

“Dipshit,” he said, giving me a shake. “All you do is fuck up my life. I hate being around you.” He exhaled heavily; his smelly breath blew into my face, making me feel sick. He stood and threw the remote at Mom. She groaned in her sleep but didn’t get up.

Dad let me go and I fell backwards, whacking my head on the coffee table. He stood, grumbling to himself about going back to the bar and never coming home, and left. I scrambled to my feet and rushed to Mom.

“Mommy,” I said quietly and put my hand on her back. “Mommy?”

She took a deep breath and moaned. Then she pushed herself up, wiping away a line of drool that ran down her cheek. Creases from her hair and the pillow indented her skin.

“Hey baby,” she said, her voice gruff.

“I forgot about school,” I said, my bottom lip coming out as I tried not to cry.

“Oh,” she said, blinking. “That’s okay.”

I nodded but was sad. I liked school. I liked being somewhere that felt safe, and I liked getting breakfast and lunch in the cafeteria. I missed my friends, and we were getting a new spelling word today.

She sighed and flopped back down on the couch. “Come cuddle with Mommy.”

I nodded, grabbed Pedro, and sat on the couch. Mom smelled and bits of thrown up food stuck in her hair. She reached down, feeling for something on the floor.

“Where is my bottle?” she asked frantically.

“I threw it away for you,” I told her. She would be happy I cleaned. “And the bag of green stuff. It was almost empty.”

Mom straightened, recoiling at my words. She pushed me away and I tumbled off the couch. “You what?” she screeched. I didn’t move. I just looked at Mom, crushed by upsetting her. Her face softened. “I’m sorry,” she groaned and put her head in her hands. “Can you go get something from the fridge?”

I nodded and stood, knowing what she wanted. I hurried away, coming back with a smaller bottle. Mom twisted off the cap.

“I really want to go to school,” I whispered to Pedro as I sat back on the floor.

“Fuck it,” Mom said. “You’re not that late. Let’s go.”

I looked up at her, smiling. “Really?”

“Yeah. Go get your stuff and give me fifteen minutes to get ready.”

I was sweating by the time we got to school. The walk from our apartment to the elementary school was only a few blocks, but Mom had me wear long sleeves to cover up the handprint on my left forearm. The sun beat down on me and the air was hot and humid, which was typical for September in southern Illinois.

Mom signed me in at the office, saying I woke up with a stomachache but was feeling better now. The lady at the desk kept giving me odd looks. Her eyebrows pushed together like she was concerned. I didn’t think she believed Mom’s story.

I made it to class in time to learn the new spelling word. I wrote it down in my notebook, silently saying the letters over and over. My stomach grumbled, the hunger almost painful, but there was still an hour until lunch. It was distracting, and I had a hard time concentrating on what the teacher, Mrs. Miller, was saying. When she called on me to answer a question, I had no idea what she was even talking about. My cheeks reddened and I turned my head down, telling her I didn’t know. She got that sympathetic look in her eyes and quickly picked someone else.

While everyone else was busy writing in their workbooks, Mrs. Miller called me out into the hall. Jeremy Mitchell ooohhh’ed as I stood, thinking I was in trouble. I wasn’t in trouble, right? Maybe at home, but not at school. I thought back. No, I hadn’t done anything wrong at school. Why did she want to talk to me in the hall?

She ushered me out of the classroom and gently closed the door. She knelt down and looked into my eyes. I cast my gaze to the floor.

“Is everything okay at home, Jackson?” she asked. It wasn’t the first time she’d asked me that this year.

My mind flashed to Mom passed out on the couch and Dad grabbing my arm this morning. I wanted to tell her the truth: that things weren’t okay, that I was scared of my own father, and how my mom looked dead almost every morning. But I couldn’t say that. Dad was, well my dad. I wasn’t supposed to be scared him.

“Yes,” I mumbled. Even if I was able to tell the truth, to find the courage to say how I really felt, I couldn’t. Mom told me not to.

“What happened to your face?” she asked next.

“I fell,” I said automatically.

“How?” Mrs. Miller pressed.

“Tripped down the stairs.” I risked a quick glance up at her. That was the excuse Mom used to explain her bruises. It seemed to work.

Mrs. Miller inhaled and nodded. “Why are you wearing a sweater, Jackson? It’s almost eight-five degrees out today and very humid.” I gave her a one-shoulder shrug. I saw her press her lips together and shake her head. “Jackson,” she started, saying my name as if she were about to deliver bad news. “I want you to know that you can trust me. It’s okay to tell me if things aren’t good at home.”

I kept my eyes on the ground and nodded. She didn’t stop looking at me. It was as if she was waiting for me to change my mind and open my mouth, to let the words I've been keeping to myself spill out. I swallowed them down and blinked back my tears.

“Do you get along with your father, Jackson?” she asked.

I ground my teeth together. I couldn’t think of a single incident in the last few months that counted as “getting along” with my father. There were times when we were in the same room together and he wasn’t yelling at Mom or me. Did that count?

“No,” I whispered without meaning to.

Mrs. Miller inhaled. “Does he ever hurt you?”

“Sometimes,” I said. Then guilt twisted my stomach. I shouldn’t have said that. I shook my head and my wavy hair fell into my eyes. Mom kept saying I needed a haircut but never took me to get one. I pushed my hair back. “He doesn’t,” I said quickly. Too quickly. Would Mrs. Miller believe me?

“All right,” she said with a sigh as she stood. “You can always come to me, Jackson. I’m your teacher, but I’m also your friend. And friends care about each other.”

I nodded again and followed her back into the room. Jeremy eyed me, but I shook my head, keeping my face low to my desk so I could pretend to work. Mrs. Miller’s words repeated in my head, over and over, until it was time for lunch.

After eating and playing outside at recess, I had forgotten about the bad morning. I remembered the correct spelling of our new word when tested later that day and checked out a new book from the library. All was good in my world again… until the end of the day.

I sat outside the school, hot from the sun and the stupid sweater. Mom was supposed to meet me and walk me home. I couldn’t leave school without her unless I had a note. And I didn’t have a note.

I waited and waited. I moved into the shade and waited some more. Still hot, I took off the sweater and tied it around my waist, pulling the sleeve of my white undershirt down on my left arm as far as I could to cover the handprint.

When the late bus left and Mom still hadn’t shown up, a teacher brought me inside and into the office. I sat on an uncomfortable chair, staring out the office windows. Mom would be here any minute now. She was late before—a lot of times actually—but she always came.

“Is there a different number I can reach your mother at?” the secretary asked me. “I tried her at home and didn’t get a response.”

I shook my head and went back to waiting. Half an hour later, I was still waiting. The secretary spoke to my teacher in a hushed voice behind the desk. Mrs. Miller’s eyes were filled with tears and she looked up at me every now and then while she spoke. I wondered what happened. Maybe her dog died. I was really sad when our puppy died last year. Dad said it was my fault because I gave him my Halloween candy, but he’d been out of dog food for three days. He had to have been hungry.

Fear churned in my stomach; it felt like worms were squiggling around in there. I squinted and looked out the office window. A police car turned into the parking lot. It didn’t have its lights on, which was disappointing. I leaned forward, eagerly watching as the police officer got out of the car and made her way to the school.

Who was in trouble? I hoped I’d see someone taken away in handcuffs. The officer came into the office. She looked at me, then up at Mrs. Miller. I saw Mrs. Miller give a tiny nod.

“Can we talk in the hall?” the officer asked. Mrs. Miller nodded again and hurried behind the secretary’s desk, calling for Mr. Wilson, the principal.

Uh-oh. Someone must really be in trouble. I wondered if Travis Martin, who was also in first grade but in a different class, was able to get his dad to arrest his teacher for giving too much homework. Travis’s dad was the sheriff of our town. Yesterday at recess, Travis swore his dad could do it.

Mr. Wilson, Mrs. Miller, and the cop stepped into the hall. Their voices were muffled, but I could still make out random words and sentences.

“She was arrested this afternoon,” the officer said. “Drunk and disorderly conduct. She didn’t have any ID on her. We had to run her prints. She was pretty beat up when we found her, but she won’t say who ruffed her up.”

I saw Mrs. Miller wipe her eyes and then say something about the bruises on my face. The officer asked her something and Mrs. Miller shook her head.

“We’ve been calling his father for close to an hour with no luck. He didn’t show up for work today, either,” Mr. Wilson said then shook his head. “I don’t think Jackson’s safe to go home with him.”

The officer nodded and said something into her walkie-talkie. She caught me looking, and her green eyes filled with sorrow. She turned away and put her hand on Mrs. Miller’s arm. Mrs. Miller hung her head, looking completely dejected.

They stayed out in the hall, talking to each other and on cell phones, for a long time. I was hungry again, and I just wanted to go home. Finally, right when my stomach was grumbling with hunger, Mrs. Miller came back into the office.

“Jackson,” she said, her voice shaking. “This is Officer Lynard. She’s going to take you somewhere safe.”

I stood, pulling my backpack over my shoulders. Finally. I wanted to go home, get Pedro, and watch TV. Officer Lynard ushered me outside and opened the door to her car. I got to ride in a police car! Jeremy would be so jealous when I told him tomorrow. Maybe I could convince Officer Lynard to turn on the siren and drive real fast!

“Can you tell me your address, Jackson?” she asked as she started the car.

I nodded and gave her the number to our apartment. I felt like I was in a movie as we drove through town, smiling when we passed people on the streets.

A young woman with short, dark blonde hair stood outside our apartment complex. She walked right up to the police car.

“Hi, Jackson,” she said with a broad smile. “My name is Kelsi. I’m from Child Protective Services. I’m going to make sure you’re taken care of until we can figure out what’s going on with your mom.”

My heart skipped a beat. “What’s wrong with my mom?”

Kelsi looked at Officer Lynard, her mouth falling open just a bit. “Uh…” she started. “Your mom got into a bit of trouble.”

“Is she in jail?” I asked. It wasn’t the first time she’d been in jail.

“Yes,” Kelsi said. I was grateful she was honest with me. Most of the time, people lied about Mom being in jail. I wondered how long it would be for this time.

“When is she coming home?”

“Not anytime soon, honey,” Kelsi said. “She got into a bit more trouble than usual.”

I nodded. “Is my dad home?”

“No, dear,” Kelsi told me. “You’re going to stay with me for a while.”

“Can I get my stuff?” I asked and rolled grit under my worn sneakers.

“Of course,” she said and put her hand on my shoulder, leading me into the apartment.

Officer Lynard walked with me up the stairs to our apartment and used a special key to open the door. She went in first, telling me to wait while she made sure it was safe. I stood in the hall, waiting for her to call me in.

When she did, I stepped into the apartment, not knowing that this would be the last time I’d ever set foot inside my home.

CHAPTER TWO

Present Day

My eyes fluttered open. I sat up, throwing the blankets off of me. My heart beat a million miles an hour and cold sweat covered my body. I took in a shaky breath and tried to rip the claws of the nightmare out of my heart.

I had the same dream over and over; it was a repeat of the day my grandmother sold me into slavery in exchange for money for drugs. I was only twelve years old at the time, but I remembered it like it happened yesterday.

We turned off a country road into the driveway of this farmhouse. It was newly restored and immaculate. It looked like something off a TV show or from a cover of one of those Home and Garden magazines.

I remembered feeling excited, thinking we were going to visit a rich friend of my grandmother’s. I had no idea she was dropping me off and leaving with a pocket full of cash, never planning to see me again.

I would never want to see her again even if I had the chance. She died the day she sold me, and I never once mourned her memory. In reality, I was the one who was dead. Nobody ever missed me. Nobody even knew I was here.

I had become a ghost; a ghost with a physical body that could make a profit. It was all so clear; every detail was vivid in my memory. No matter how hard I tried, the flashback replayed.

The memory of a tall man with perfectly combed blonde hair forced its way into my mind. He came down the front steps of the farmhouse, meeting us halfway. He looked me up and down, spinning me around more than once.

“He’s taller than you said,” he told my grandmother. “He looks old.” The blonde man frowned. “I’ll give you half.”

She shook her head, graying hair falling into her face. “He hasn’t hit puberty yet,” she promised. “I want the full amount.”

The blonde man had sighed, looked at his watch, and then out at the street. “Half. If I hadn’t already taken care of the paperwork, you’d get nothing. I won’t get much use out of him.” Even then, when I was so young and innocent, I knew something bad was happening.

My stomach twisted and I shook my head, forcing away the memory. The blonde man—Nate—had gotten plenty use out of me. It wasn’t until I was a teenager that clients turned me down. And until three years ago, I had one repeat client every week.

Mrs. McHenry was rich. Very rich. And she was old… in her seventies old. She made me do things I’d never heard of. But as much as I detested going down on an old woman, I had grown to almost like her.

She was nice to me and treated me like a human being. I was almost disappointed when she stopped hiring me—well, Nate technically. I never got to keep any of the money clients paid. I assumed she had died. She was old and her health was declining. I didn’t think she knew the extent of my slavery. I was sure she assumed I kept the hundred dollar bills she slipped inside my pants when I went to the door to leave.

But Zane, Nate’s lesser business half, took it from me the moment I got into the car. Zane partnered with Nate a few years after I was sold to him. Zane was three years older than me, and I had no idea how he and Nate had met. One day he was at the house, talking and laughing with Nate. The next day, Zane brought three girls back to the farmhouse.

And he had been Nate’s business partner ever since. He lived at the house with him, which was the perfect cover for the sex slave operation that was run out of the guest room. Though I’d never seen them together in public, I assumed Nate pretended Zane was his son. He was proud enough of him.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed and sighed. I hated waking up. Every night when I laid down to sleep, I prayed the darkness would take over and I would slip into a peaceful nonexistence.

That had yet to happen. It was disappointing to wake up every morning and relive the abuse and pain, over and over. I felt dead. Inside, I knew I was. My heart and soul died a long time ago. They lay shriveled up and cold somewhere deep inside of me. Sometimes the darkness inside started to consume me. I had to remind myself that I was alive. I had to keep going no matter how much I wanted it all to end.

I got dressed and put my hand on the doorknob. I twisted and pulled back, but the door didn’t open. It was locked from the outside. I let out a breath and went back to my bed, eyeing a box of books that sat on the floor. I didn’t have it in me to pick up a book and read. Books had gotten me this far, offering an escape from reality. I was at the point now where I didn’t want to do anything but fade away; like the life that had slipped like sand through my clenched fists.

I squinted into the sun, standing outside the apartment building. Phoebe was supposed to have come out fifteen minutes ago. A horn blared behind me. I turned to see Zane in his black Camaro, impatiently waving at the building.

I nodded and pushed off the brick building. The complex was new, and I needed to be buzzed in. I went over the rehearsed lines in my head; the ones that Nate told me to say in situations like this.

Lying didn’t faze me anymore. I did what I was told and avoided the torture. I slowly went up the stone steps. Someone left the apartment right as I got to the door.

“Here ya go,” the man said, holding the door open for me.

I pressed my lips together in a smile and gave him a nod in thanks before taking the door and slipping inside. I didn’t have to lie. I didn’t have to talk to anyone. I should have felt relief. Instead, I felt nothing.

I was nothing. I didn’t exist. All I was good for was running errands and obeying orders. Just like now.

I hurried past the attendant, keeping my eyes focused ahead of me to act like I knew where I was going. I got in the elevator and pressed the button to take me to the fourth floor.

I went up one floor when the elevator stopped and the doors opened. An older couple carrying a little white dog got in. The woman smiled at me.

“It’s hot out there today, isn’t it?” she asked me.

I cast my eyes down and nodded. It was hot outside, right? I hadn’t noticed. I stepped back, wishing I could disappear into the wall. I hated when people talked to me. I thought they could see right through me; that they could see all I was.

Or all I wasn’t.

The old lady narrowed her eyes and tipped her head. “Are you all right?” she asked as if she could read my thoughts.

“Yeah,” I mumbled and crossed my arms, flattening my hands over the scars that lined my biceps.

She switched her dog to her other arm and pressed a button. We went up to the fourth floor. I got out before the doors were even opened all the way. I hurried away, wanting to get away from the old couple’s judging eyes. I made it halfway down the hall before I realized I had gone the wrong way.

I spun around and slunk to the other side of the apartment complex, stopping in front of room number 432. I knocked on the door and stood back. After several minutes, the door opened.

“What do you want?” a tall man with gray hair asked. “I paid you already.”

“I’m here for the girl,” I said, flicking my eyes to him. “Time is up.”

“She left,” he said gruffly.

Oh fuck. Where the hell had Phoebe gone? I swallowed and nodded, shuffling my feet as I backed away.

There was a time when I would have been happy Phoebe had tried to run for it, when I would have rooted for her, when I would have helped her escape. But not anymore. I was tired of the pain, not only inflicted on myself but on the girls. I couldn’t handle watching anyone else get hurt.

My mind was blank as I went back to the elevator. I got in but didn’t press any buttons. I stood motionless, unable to process a logical thought. Then I blinked and realized I was stalling. Maybe that would work. Maybe I could give Phoebe enough time to get away and get help.

The elevator doors opened, startling me. Three teenage girls got in, chatting away. One eyed me up and down. I turned to the side, not wanting to be seen. The ride to the first floor was excruciating. When the doors opened and the girls got out, I debated on riding back up to the top floor and then down again just to buy more time.

If Zane found out, it would end in more pain on my end. I sighed. Sometimes I wished he’d just beat me to death and get it over with. I would be free then. I stepped out of the elevator and walked through the lobby.

Maybe I should kill myself instead. For the last decade, I’d belonged to Nate and Zane. I didn’t want to die on their terms.

I held my hand over my eyes, shielding them from the sun. I went down the steps and crossed the parking lot. Zane was standing next to the car. Oh shit. And Phoebe was at his side. He had his fingers wrapped around her wrist.

If anyone were to walk past, they would think Zane and Phoebe were a couple. He held her tight, pressed up against his side, but his sky blue eyes were filled with rage.

“Let me go!” Phoebe shouted, her voice heavily accented. She was from Vietnam, lured here by Nate under the false pretense he was a photographer. She pulled against Zane, her long, black hair whipping his face.

“What the fuck took you so long?” Zane asked me, flipping Phoebe around so that she was pinned between his body and the car. “Are you fucking retarded? Apparently you don’t know how to do something as simple as collect the merchandise.”

I stopped short. There was a part of me, buried deep inside, that wanted to rush over and push Zane off of Phoebe. But the part of me that had been beaten down over the years was stronger. That part won. It always did.

I rarely answered Zane. Usually, he was okay with that. He’d rattle off more threats and insults but rarely hurt me in public. Rarely. There was always a chance.

Phoebe shouted something in Vietnamese and slapped Zane. My eyes widened and my heart skipped a beat as I watched the exchange. Zane smacked Phoebe hard across the face and shoved her back into the car. Phoebe brought her knee up, hitting Zane in the balls. Then she twisted out of his hold and took off.

“Fuck!” Zane shouted, his hands flying to between his legs. “What the fuck are you waiting for?” he yelled. “Go get her!”

I blinked, watching Zane double over in pain. A small smile pulled up my lips. It was rare that I got to see Zane hurt. I liked it.

Zane suddenly straightened up, the anger disappearing from his face instantly. Someone pulled into the parking spot next to him. A good-looking redhead got out of the car. Zane quickly noticed her long legs ending in high heels.

Zane flashed his perfectly white smile. The redheaded woman blushed and said hello before walking past and going up to the apartment complex. She passed by me without so much as a glance and turned to check out Zane one more time before she went inside.

Seething, Zane limped over and grabbed my arm. He was only a few inches taller than me. I was just as strong, if not stronger, than he was. I could take him out, throw a few punches, and get him on the ground. Then I remember the Glock hidden under Zane’s black shirt and thought twice.

“Go,” he ordered. “Now.” I moved forward, going slow on purpose. Zane shoved me. “Pick up the pace, dipshit,” he grumbled. We got in the car. Zane stomped on the gas, tires squealing as we peeled out of the parking lot.

Some sort of festival was going on today. The streets were lined with venders and people milled about. Zane turned the wheel hard, accelerating the wrong way down a one-way street.

“There’s the bitch,” he grumbled and stepped on the gas. Phoebe was just yards in front of us, running down the road. Zane pressed his foot down even harder on the gas.

“Stop!” I yelled. Phoebe was close, so close. We were going to hit her! My eyes widened. Her dark hair whipped across her back. “Zane!”

He didn’t slow down. I closed my eyes and turned my head. At the last minute, Zane slammed on the brakes.

Fuck that was close. Though if she had gotten hit, there was no way Zane could scoop her up unnoticed. I wanted her to get hit by a car.

How fucked up was that?

Phoebe ran onto a street that was blocked off for a parade. She was limping and holding her side. She wouldn’t make it much farther before she had to stop and rest.

“Cock sucking motherfucker!” Zane yelled and hit the steering wheel. He revved the engine and turned the car around. I could see Zane fuming. Sometimes I imagined steam coming out of his ears, like a cartoon character. Only Zane was worse than any fictional villain. He was sadistic, ruthless even. And he always won. Good had yet to triumph over him. I doubted it ever would.

He sped down the block and raced across a street that was supposed to be blocked off. The Camaro lurched forward, speeding down a road that led to the alley Phoebe had fled to. The car slid to a stop in front of the alley.

Phoebe was slumped down next to a dumpster. Her lip was bleeding from where Zane had hit her. Tears streamed down her face and her head jerked up when she heard us walking. Her eyes met mine, wide and pleading. She diverted her gaze to a young woman who stood just a few feet in front of her.

My heart skipped a beat. I stared at the woman. Her shoulder length brown hair glistened in the sun. She had high cheekbones and long lashes that came together when she blinked. She was tall and lean, wearing shorts and a button up shirt. Her green eyes were full of concern.

She looked over at us, relief coming over her face for a brief second.

“Help!” she said, her voice shaking. “I... I think she’s been mugged. I don’t know what happened, but she’s bleeding. She needs help!”

I looked at her, Phoebe, and then Zane. I swallowed. This wasn’t going to end well. The girl was innocent. She was trying to help Phoebe. She had no idea what she was getting in the middle of. She didn’t know anything. She could get out now before it was too late. I opened my mouth to tell her to run. As soon as I sucked in the breath to speak, Zane elbowed me in the ribs.

Zane stepped up, putting on his charm. “It’s okay,” he said and moved forward, inching toward Phoebe. “I’m going to help her, don’t worry.”

Everything happened in slow motion, and I stood rooted in the spot, too numb to act. I saw Phoebe’s fingers curl into a fist. She scooped up a handful of gravel and raised her arm. She jumped up and brought her hand over her head.

“Go!” she yelled to the woman before she unleashed the gravel at Zane. The color drained from the woman’s face as she realized that Zane wasn’t there to help Phoebe. He was the one she had been running from. Zane snapped out of his false charm and lunged for Phoebe. He grabbed her shoulders and shoved her back. Her head hit against the dumpster and she slumped back to the ground.

My breath left me in a ragged huff. Holy fucking shit.

I raced over to Phoebe, carefully scooping her up. She had fallen on broken glass. Her hands were cut up and bleeding. I flipped them over, inspecting the damage. Bits of gravel and glass stuck into her skin. I grimaced and hoped Nate would let me clean her wounds before she was banished to the basement again.

Zane turned around, glaring at us. His hand flew to the gun tucked into the back of his pants. I wrapped my arms around Phoebe, using my body to shield her. I closed my eyes, bracing for the shot.

He’d done it before, shot a girl who tried to run away. She didn’t die instantly. The bullet hit her in the leg so she couldn’t run again. I was there, in the basement, when she limped down the stairs, close to passing out from the loss of blood.

No, she didn’t die instantly. But I wished she had. It took three weeks for the infection to shut her body down. Nate forced me to carry her upstairs the day she died. She was still holding on, still taking shallow, ragged breaths. I laid her down on the guest bed and retreated to my room while a paying customer raped her, one last time.

I shuddered at the memory, feeling sick all over again. Phoebe clung to me, the blood on her hands soaking into my shirt. Her chest rapidly rose and fell and she began to cry. She ducked her head into my shoulder.

But the shot never came. I looked up just in time to see Zane shove the woman who had tried to help to the ground. Her knees scraped against the pavement and her cell phone bounced out of her hand.

“Help!” she screamed. Zane kicked her in the side and she fell face first onto the dirty alley. The parade was passing by. Drums and cymbals clanged, drowning out the woman’s screams. Zane kicked her again then stepped to the side, stomping on the cell phone. He picked up the broken phone and threw it in the dumpster.

Sweat dripped down my forehead. My heart hammered in my chest. I had to do something. I let go of Phoebe and jumped up. Zane kicked the woman again and pulled the gun from the back of his pants. He pointed it at me.

I froze, my chest heaving as I sucked in air. Do it. Shoot me and end this all. Maybe people would hear the shot and come running. Maybe I wouldn’t die instantly, either. Maybe I could tell them about Nate and Zane and their house full of sex slaves.

He didn’t pull the trigger. Instead, he curled his hand into a fist and hit the woman as hard as he could on her head. Her eyes rolled back and she collapsed onto the ground.

My mouth fell open, and I stared at Zane.

“What the fuck are you looking at?” he growled and put the gun away. He ran his hand over his dark hair, making sure it was still perfectly in place. It was, though even if it wasn’t, Zane still looked good. That’s why Nate liked him. Zane had the looks to get anyone’s attention. Girls wanted to be with him and guys wanted to be him.

He was manipulative. There was a time when I felt compelled to praise him, to make him happy, and desperately sought his approval. Then I got to know him and I saw the animal he really was.

“You… you attacked her for no reason,” I finally said.

Zane’s blue eyes widened and he threw out his arms. “She called the cops. What the fuck better reason do you need?”

Phoebe stood on shaky legs. She took a tentative step forward and took my hand. Her skin was warm and sticky with blood.

“She innocent,” Phoebe said. “Jackson right. No reason to hurt her.”

“Shut up,” Zane said and jerked his body toward us. Phoebe flinched. “Pick her up.”

I didn’t move. What did he want me to do? No… no way.

“Are you deaf as well as dumb?” Zane said, shaking his head. He swallowed hard and ran his hand over his hair again. He was nervous. Zane was already irrational and sadistic. He was even worse when he was nervous. “Pick. Her. Up,” he said through gritted teeth.

I nodded and pulled my hand from Phoebe’s grasp. If I did what I was told, I wouldn’t get hurt. And the girls wouldn’t get hurt. Zane often used them as a threat against me.

My heart was in my throat as I walked over to the woman. She was lying face down in the alley. A bruise was already starting to form on her temple. Carefully, I put my arms under her and pulled her to me. She didn’t weigh much; I stood up with ease.

“Take her to the car,” he said, stealing a glance behind him. People milled about, but they were all too busy watching the floats slowly moving down the street to notice us.

Do what I was told and avoid the pain.

I picked up one foot and took a step. Zane picked up the woman’s purse and took a handful of Phoebe’s hair. He yanked her forward and popped the truck.

“Put her in,” he ordered and pulled Phoebe to the side of the car.

Nerves made their way up and down my arms. I hadn’t felt this much in weeks. All I felt was fear and dread, which was almost better than nothing at all.

Or was it?

CHAPTER THREE

“Put her in the closet,” Nate said. Anger flashed over his calm face. He closed his eyes in a long blink. I watched a vein in his neck pulsate along with his pounding heart. His nostrils flared, and he glared at Zane.

I hadn’t set the woman—Adeline was her name according to her driver’s license— down since we stepped foot into the large farmhouse. She had been drugged, and was unconscious. I held her close to me, feeling oddly protective of her.

“I’ll figure out what to do with her later,” Nate said and smoothed out his jacket. Nate was tall and blonde, with blue eyes just like Zane. “Then you will tell me exactly how you fucked up to this extent.”

“It was Jackson’s fault!” Zane shouted. “He let that China girl run away. He doesn’t know how to do his fucking job!”

Nate held up his hand. Zane shut up immediately. He crossed his arms but dropped his eyes.

“I’m not concerned with faults,” Nate said, regaining his composer. He took in a steady breath. “Put her in the closet, Jackson.”

I nodded and walked through the kitchen. The basement door was kept locked with three locks. I twisted the deadbolts back and flicked on the lights. Rochelle and Lily, the other girls who were kept down there along with Phoebe, were gone that day, working. They wouldn’t be back until late tonight.

I slowly walked down the steps, careful not to whack Adeline’s head on the narrow stairway. I hated the basement. There was a time when I had been kept down here, back when Nate pimped me out to clients. I had buried those memories deep down and didn’t allow myself to even dig them up.

I couldn’t handle it. My grandmother sold me to Nate when I was twelve, and I’d been here ever since. I fought tooth and nail at first—for the first five years to be exact. Then something happened and I gave up. I stopped fighting. I stopped defying Nate. And I’d been going through the motions ever since, hoping every day would be my last.

The basement smelled of urine and body odor. The scent had seeped into the wood and I didn’t think any amount of cleaning would ever get that smell out. I passed by a row of dingy cots where the girls were forced to sleep.

On the opposite side of the basement was an old storage closet. It was small and reeked of mildew. Cobwebs hung from the low rafters. I stopped outside of it, shifting Adeline in my arms so that I could shoot back the deadbolt.

I used my foot to open the door and stepped inside, carefully laying Adeline down on the damp cement floor.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered to her. I felt bad for her, but my brain wouldn’t allow me to process what would happen. It wasn’t good, but I wasn’t going there.

Don’t think, don’t feel. Do what I’m told and avoid the pain.

I stood and walked out of the closet, closing and locking the door. I trudged up the stairs. I paused at the top step to push open the door. Right as my hand was about to grace the splintered wood, the door flew open.

Zane stood in the doorway. His face was twisted with rage and his right cheek was bright red. Nate must have hit him.

“You’re a worthless piece of shit,” he snarled and rushed forward, extending his hands. He hit me square in the shoulders. I fell back, hands madly reaching for the railing. I pitched forward, my chin hitting a step, and then slid down a few more, my head hitting each and every wooden plank.

I came to a stop halfway down the stairs. My nose was bleeding and a large piece of wood had splintered off the railing and wedged under my fingernail. I blinked, my ears ringing with pain.

I knew better than to get up. Zane was still standing in the doorway, waiting for me. He was angry, and he liked to take his anger out on me. He stared me down, teeth clenched so hard his breath came out like a growl. His fingers were curled into fists.

I didn’t look into his eyes. I never did when he was this mad. He went beyond angry, to an irrational point where reasoning didn’t exist.

I couldn’t sleep. I was in a great deal of pain from falling down the stairs, though, I was used to being in pain. Nate had locked me in my upstairs bedroom without eating lunch or dinner. That, also, was something I was used to. I kept a very small stash of food hidden in the back of the cabinet in the attached bathroom.

Neither pain nor hunger kept me awake. It was that girl, Adeline. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw her standing in the alley, wanting to help Phoebe. What was she doing back there? All she wanted to do was help a stranger and it had landed her here… in hell.

What was Nate planning to do with her? He’d never just taken someone. No, all of the girls he owned were carefully selected. Most had already run away from home. No one was looking for them. They had no family to go back to.

But Adeline… she was different. She shouldn’t be here. She did nothing wrong. Not that any of the other girls did, but Adeline was different.

I remembered the concern in her eyes, the way she wanted to help Phoebe. The sunlight reflected off her hair as she turned to look at us coming down the alley. Then fear took over her pretty face.

I wanted to help her. I wanted her to escape before it was too late. I shook my head and rolled over, wincing at a pain in my side. Why was I thinking like this? It didn’t matter. I didn’t matter. I was nothing; I couldn’t save her.

I tossed and turned the rest of the night, unable to get comfortable or get the image of Adeline out of my head. I finally drifted to sleep when the sun began to rise, but I knew I had to get up in just a few hours later to do yard work. Nate liked the house to be in pristine condition. I used to think he wanted to impress people, but really, he was OCD about things being neat and tidy.

My door wasn’t locked today, which meant Nate must have changed the codes on the automatic locks on all the exterior doors. Any door that led outside required a code to get in or out of. Sometimes I knew the numbers to punch in. And then sometimes Nate changed them. I was stuck in the house, not that I would try and escape again.

The thoughts of escaping hadn’t entered my head in years. The last time I tried to run away, Zane took off my shirt, handcuffed my hands behind my back, and tied me to stake in the ground in the backyard. He said if I wanted to leave the house that bad I could spend the day outside.

It didn’t seem like a bad punishment until the sun came out. I spent every hour of daylight under it. Zane had fun slapping my sunburned skin for the next few days.

Don’t think, don’t feel, don’t want. Do what I’m told and avoid the pain.

My mind blanked and I went downstairs, a little surprised to see Nate already up and dressed. At least I could spend a few quiet minutes inside making him breakfast before I had to go out in the heat.

I spent the next hour cooking, serving food, and cleaning the kitchen before I went outside, not being allowed back in to cool off or get a drink of water until a row of new bushes were put in along the front of the house.

“Jackson,” Nate called from inside the house. He spoke my name with complete indifference. I wasn’t important enough for him to hate me. I was useful. That was the only reason I was offered food, water, and a place to rest. Allowing me to eat and drink was like putting oil in a car. Nate didn’t care about my comfort, but I needed food and rest to function. “Come.”

I wiped sweat off my forehead and set down the shovel. There were two more bushes to be planted. What did he want?

I took off my muddy boots. The soles were wearing out, not like that mattered. I was lucky Nate even let me wear shoes, right? Wiping the sweat from my face, I opened the garage door that led into a mudroom.

I could hear Nate talking in a low voice. I took a tentative step onto the kitchen. Dressed in khakis and a blue polo shirt, Nate looked professional as always. The floor creaked under my feet. Nate whirled around, glaring at me as if I had walked in on a top-secret meeting.

He hurried out of the room to finish his conversation. Zane sat at the island counter, eating a donut and drinking coffee. I could smell the alcoholic creamer from across the room.

His blue eyes had a dark glint in them. His pulled his full lips into a smirk when he saw me. Then he looked at the basement door.

Oh shit. Adeline.

I froze, standing in the middle of the kitchen. What was Nate going to make me do to her? Before I could process that thought, Nate came back into the room.

“Go get the girl,” he ordered. He wasn’t looking at me. I turned my head down, waiting for Zane to realize he had been given an order. His nostrils flared, and he threw his remaining donut on the counter.

“Clean it up,” Zane said to me, and then stood so fast the stool tipped over. He pushed past me, purposely shouldering me against the wall. My body acted on its own accord. I didn’t have to think about cleaning up after Zane. I just did it. I grabbed a towel and swept up the crumbs. Then I put his plate and coffee cup in the dishwasher.

Zane was already standing at the open basement door, waiting. His shoulders were tense. I could tell he was nervous. This was, after all, his fault. He was the one who decided to beat up that poor girl and bring her back. He was the kidnapper.

“Bring her up here,” Nate said and waved his hand before disappearing into the living room. Zane rolled his eyes but obliged, gracefully jogging down the stairs. I followed behind him.

Lily and Rochelle—two of Nate’s most popular girls—stayed at the house. Lily was  young, only fifteen, and hand thick strawberry blonde hair. She was beautiful, and could look a lot older with the right makeup on. She had been here for months; she ran away from a broken home, one much like mine, and found solace in Zane. She was in too deep to get away by the time she realized his true intentions.

And she had no home to go back to.

I didn’t think either would try to run; Rochelle had been here so long she forgot she was a victim. She was in love with Zane and was so broken she truly thought he loved her too. Rochelle was tall and lean, with flawless dark skin and deep, dark eyes. She could play any part: she worked at the club, on the streets, and had regular clients visit her at the house. Plus she was Zane’s personal fuck-doll. Rochelle did anything Zane asked with no hesitation.

And Lily, young, innocent Lily, was starting to fall into Rochelle’s shadow. Phoebe, tricked into leaving Vietnam for a “modeling job”, was the biggest flight risk, obviously.

Lily sat up, blinking away the sleep from her eyes. Then she shot up, looking at the closet where Adeline was being held. I shook my head, telling her to keep quiet and stay out of trouble. I wasn’t supposed to talk to the girls, and they weren’t supposed to talk to me. She quickly nodded and laid back down.

“Son of a bitch,” Zane grumbled, stopping short in front of the door. Adeline had tried to escape. Desperately. She had broken the knob off the door. Half had fallen and rolled across the basement floor. She wouldn’t have been able to escape; there was a deadbolt on the outside of the door.

Zane pulled a key from his pocket and stuck it in the lock. He kicked the doorknob out of the way and pulled the door open. I stepped closer behind him, almost scared to look inside.

Adeline was curled up in a little ball on the floor. Her hair was a mess and her cheeks were flushed. Makeup ran under her eyes from tears. Zane wrinkled his nose; the closet smelled like urine and musk. She was clutching the other side of the doorknob, probably in hopes to use it as a weapon against Zane. He leaned over and snatched it out of her hand.

“Get up,” he said gruffly and used the toe of his leather shoe to jab at her side. Her eyes flew open. She looked up at Zane, terror taking over face. She scrambled to her feet, trembling. Her arms wrapped around her torso and she cowered.

Weak sunlight filtered through the dirty basement window, illuminating her pretty face. She looked so scared, yet so determined, reminding me of a grounded bird without enough room to spread her wings and fly away. Zane stepped forward, and she flinched.

“Go upstairs,” he said through gritted teeth. “Nate wants to see you.”

I wanted to tell him that this poor girl had no idea who Nate was. But I didn’t. I hung back, watching. Adeline took a deep breath and set her face, trying so hard not to look afraid. But when Zane lurched forward, she jerked away. He laughed.

“Now,” he ordered and shoved her in the shoulder. She walked past him, her eyes landing on me. I tipped my head in the direction of the stairs.

“This way,” I said quietly and turned, going up the stairs. I moved slow, still sore from being thrown down last night. Stuck behind me and in front of Zane, Adeline had no choice but to follow us into the living room.

“There she is,” Nate said and stood. He had been sitting on the couch flipping through a book. I stepped to the side, not wanting to be in the way. Once again, I wished I could melt into the background and never come back.

Nate moved close to Adeline, looking her up and down like she was a horse at an auction. When he reached out to touch her, she flinched. Zane rushed forward, ready to defend Nate.

As if this thin woman posed much of a threat…

“Shhh,” Nate soothed, taking Adeline’s face into his hands. Tears rolled down her cheeks. He wiped them away and turned her head, looking at the bruise on her face. “You shouldn’t have hit her,” he said to Zane “This is going to take time to heal. And time costs me.”

Nate let his hand fall, his fingertips brushing against her collarbone then down to her breasts. I didn’t see it coming. But all of the sudden Adeline balled her fingers into a fist and hit Nate in the face. Nate stepped back, his hands flying to the injury. Adeline spun, but didn’t make it far before Zane grabbed her.

My eyes widened as I watched her struggle to get free. Zane snarled, going after her like the attack dog he was. He knocked her to the floor, and she responded by hitting him in the balls. Anger twisted his face. She managed to hit him one more time before he kicked her in the back,

“Get her up,” Nate bellowed.

Zane kicked her again. Adeline cried out in pain and pulled against him as Zane stood her up.

“You’re not going to get away with this!” she threatened. “My family knows I’m missing. They will come looking for me!”

Zane held her back, and Nate walked forward, slowly, like a wolf stalking its prey. Then he reached out and yanked her shirt apart, ripping the buttons that went up the front. He stuck his hands inside her tank top, cupping her breasts.

Nate was checking her out, making sure she was good enough to be one of his girls. Fuck. Fear rippled through me like electricity.

“Don’t touch me!” Adeline yelled as she tried to kick Nate again. Zane rolled his eyes and hooked his leg around hers, knocking her off balance.

“She’s old,” Nate noted, looking past me to Zane.

“Nineteen, according to her license. But the older ones do better on the street,” Zane pointed out.

“Yes,” Nate agreed and tipped his head, looking at Adeline as he ran his hands down her stomach. “But someone could recognize her. The girl is right. People will be looking.”

“She could do well in the club,” Zane blurted. Sweat broke out across his forehead. If Nate didn’t find a use for Adeline… I didn’t know. Would he really kill her? Zane had killed before. Murder was messy. Risky. It wasn’t something Nate would readily agree to. “She’s tall and thin. She’d fit right in.”

“And pretty. Very pretty.” Nate’s said, moving his hands to her thighs. “And possibly an athlete. She would look good on stage.” He squeezed her muscles and then let go. “But you do not seem to grasp the concept of her being recognized. I’m not risking my business.”

Adeline’s face blanked as the color drained from it. She was putting it all together, figuring out what kind of people Nate and Zane were. They wouldn’t… no. No way. Adeline couldn’t work in the club. She couldn’t work at all. “I told him there were other options,” I blurted. There had been… but it was too late now. “But he didn’t listen.”

“Nobody asked you, Jackson,” Zane spat.

“He’s right,” Nate said. Zane’s nostrils flared.

“It’s your fault,” Zane snarled at me, unable to handle hearing Nate tell him that I was right all along. “You can’t even handle looking after one measly girl. She fucking ran away! You’re a worthless piece of shit!”

Phoebe running away wouldn’t have been as big of an issue as this. Zane kidnapped someone. Someone who wouldn’t even be profitable to Nate

“Enough,” Nate said, his tone calm. It unnerved me how calm he always was. “She’s here. We have to deal with it, one way or another.”

I flicked my eyes to Adeline. Her bottom lip quivered and she blinked back tears.

“What else do you know?” Nate asked Zane. They had already gone over the details. Zane had spent several hours on the computer, looking up any info he could find about Adeline. Nate only asked so Adeline could hear it out loud. He wanted to scare her.

I fucking hated Nate.

“Her name is Adeline Miller,” Zane sneered. “Parents own an art gallery where her mom teaches painting classes. She’s in school to be a nurse, has a younger sister named Arianna, two dogs that she trains and shows, and runs some blog called Contagious Reads. It's about books.”

“Very good,” Nate praised, finding pleasure in Adeline’s fear and confusion. “Teenagers,” he sighed, “never listen to the warnings about the dangers of social networking. You’re all so willing to post every single mundane detail about your pathetic lives.” He spun around and rubbed his forehead. Sitting heavily on the couch, he stared at her. “Do you know where you are?”

She shook her head, causing her brown hair to fall over her eyes.

“Good.” Nate looked her up and down again. “Are you a virgin?” he asked causally.

Adeline hesitated and my heart skipped a beat. If she was, there was no way Nate was letting her go… not that she stood much of a chance of escaping anyway.

“Well?” Nate asked.

“I can find out,” Zane said with a smile and slid his hand down the front of her shorts. All I could do was stand there and watch, memories of being groped and prodded paralyzing me. Adeline cried out as Zane shoved his fingers inside of her. Zane laughed.

“No!” she shouted. “I’m not. I’m not a virgin.”

Zane’s smile widened and hunger burned in his eyes. He wasn’t getting off on touching her; he was getting off on her fear and the pain he was causing her.

I fucking hated Zane, too.

Zane pulled his hand out of her pants. “She’s not lying.”

Nate sighed. “Too bad. Older virgins are so hard to come by these days,” he muttered to himself. He turned his attention to Adeline. “It’s pretty simple here. Follow the rules and you won’t get hurt. Break the rules…” he trailed off with a sickening chuckle. “Well, you’ll just have to see for yourself now, dearie.” He waved his hand in the air. “Take her downstairs. Feed her. I’ll figure out what to do with her later.”

CHAPTER FOUR

Nate figured out what to do with Adeline right away. But he didn’t tell her. He purposely dragged it out, keeping her locked away in the basement all alone. He was trying to break her, the same way he broke the other girls.

Only they came here in pieces.

I didn’t think Adeline would break that easily. I brought her food a few times in the passing days. She was angry as well as scared. Maybe if she held onto that anger, she wouldn’t get lost in the dark like I had. Maybe she’d find a way out. She had, after all, thrown a few punches at Nate and Zane. I replayed the way the air whooshed out of Zane when Adeline struck him in the balls over and over in my mind.

The last time I hit Zane, Nate broke my arm. My bones hurt just thinking about it. Zane held me back while Nate twisted my arm out, bending it until something snapped. He wouldn’t let me get it looked at for over a week. By that time, the bone had to be reset.

“Hey, loser,” Zane called from down the hall. I set the scrub brush down and stood, my legs tired from mowing the lawn yesterday. I brushed my hair out of my face with my arm and rinsed the cleaning products from my hands.

“Loser,” Zane repeated. “Come when I call you.”

I didn’t dry my hands. I left the bathroom, standing in the threshold of the hallway.

“Yes,” I said dryly.

“You need to pick up Lily and Rochelle.”

I knew I was supposed to pick them up. Had I lost track of time? I nodded, noticing the M9 holstered to Zane’s belt.

“Then shouldn’t you go?” he asked.

“It’s not time yet.”

Anger flashed across Zane’s face. He reached out and struck me in the side of the head. My ear rang, but it didn’t faze me. One punch wasn’t so bad.

“Don’t talk back to me,” he sneered. “Go get Rochelle. And Lily,” he added.

It made sense now. Zane occasionally slept with Rochelle. She had been his girlfriend at one point, well before he manipulated her into working for Nate. Rochelle had been a homeless hooker on the street when Zane found her several years ago.

She thought he was her knight in shining armor, but really, he was the devil in disguise.

Zane didn’t love Rochelle. He loved that she loved him. And I knew he was still suffering an ego blow from Nate’s scolding over the Adeline situation. He needed validation, and who better to do that than Rochelle?

“Okay,” I sighed and started down the hall. I grabbed the keys to an old Blazer, the only car I was allowed to drive, and made my way to the strip club that Nate owned. The sun was sinking in the sky, but the day was still bright. The sky was completely cloudless and the air was warm but not hot.

I barely noticed. I had gotten good at retreating inside myself, at shutting off my thoughts and feelings. I was a shell, just the shadow of the person I used to be. I didn’t really remember him, and when I did, I despised him.

There was only a small time in my life when I remembered being happy. After my mom lost custody, I was in and out of foster care until my grandma took me. The first few homes I was at weren’t happy places. But the last one… my dead heart began to thump in my chest as I exited off the highway.

The last one felt like home. Like something I’d never felt before. Stephanie, my foster mom, was loving and caring. It was hard to remember her face or the sound of her voice. I thought all of my good memories—no matter how few—had been literally beaten out of me. It didn’t matter. I was nothing now. Nothings don’t have memories. Or feelings. They don’t think or feel. They just do what they’re told and avoid the pain.

Zane threw open the basement door so hard it swung back and hit the wall. Great. Nate was going to be pissed. And I would get blamed. I turned around from the stove, expecting to see him stomping up the stairs.

I wasn’t expecting to see him leading Rochelle up. His arm was around her and she limped. I set down the wooden ladle, turned off the burner, and moved over, taking her from Zane once they reached the top of the stairs.

“What happened?” I asked.

Rochelle winced. I led her to the breakfast nook and pulled out a chair. “I fucking twisted my ankle,” she said. “I’m such an idiot.” Tears filled her dark eyes and she shook her head. Rochelle was beautiful. She always had been, though I thought she was prettier before the plastic surgery Zane insisted she have.

“You’re not an idiot,” I said softly.

Zane shoved me away. “Like you would know,” he mumbled and bent down, taking Rochelle’s foot in his hand. Her ankle was swollen.

“It looks sprained,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Oh, so you’re a fucking doctor now?” Zane retorted with a huff.

“I’m fine,” Rochelle said to Zane. “Really, baby. I am.

“Can you stand?” he asked.

Rochelle looked up at him, desperate to please him.

“She shouldn’t—” I started but never got the chance to finish. Zane elbowed me hard in the ribs, then punched me hard in the stomach. I doubled over in pain, feeling vomit rise in my throat. Zane sprung forward, throwing his hands out and hitting me on the shoulders. He shoved me hard, and I stumbled back, already off balance. I hit the floor hard, my elbow smacking against the hard tile.

Zane kicked me in the shin. I rolled to the side and curled my legs up to my chest. I ducked my head down, trying to shield myself as best as I could while I waited for this to end.

“Zane!” Rochelle said and sprung to her feet. “I’m fine. Look!”

Zane stopped kicking me to turn. “Walk,” he ordered.

I peeked through my arms to see Rochelle limping across the kitchen floor. Rochelle never did me any favors. She didn’t like me because Zane didn’t like me. But, I knew she didn’t like seeing anyone get beaten up.

“No,” Zane said and took her hand. “You can’t work like this.” He led her back to the chair, fake concern on his face. He heavily sighed and left the room. I pushed myself up and went back to the stove.

I could hear Zane on the phone, no doubt talking to Nate. He wasn’t worried about Rochelle’s well-being. Clearly, the girl needed to see a doctor. He was worried about upholding Rochelle’s reputation, which he thought reflected directly back on him since he “found” her. Rochelle was like a project to Zane, and right now she was the shining star of this hell-forsaken place.

“Go back downstairs,” Zane said to Rochelle as he came into the kitchen. He put his phone in his back pocket. “Make that new girl fill in for you.” He rolled his eyes. “At least we can find out if she’s of any use.”

“No!” I blurted, turning from the pan of vegetables so quickly I dropped the spoon. Hot oil splattered on my legs.

“What did you say to me?” Zane asked, straightening up by pushing his shoulders back. Fuck. He would put on a show in front of Rochelle.

“People are looking for her,” I said, my voice breathy. I bent over and picked up the spoon. “She might get recognized.”

Zane shrugged. “No one will cross me. Do you think they will?”

I cast my eyes down. “No. They won’t.”

Zane stepped forward, his eyes lighting up at the thought of hurting me. I swallowed and waited, my heart pounding in my ears. The second hand of the clock on the wall loudly ticked, teasing me. Any moment now, Zane would hit me.

He snickered and turned away. Some of the tension eased out of me, and my shoulders relaxed. Then Zane turned and punched me in the mouth. My lip pressed against my teeth, and I instantly tasted blood.

Laughing, Zane turned around, put an arm around Rochelle, and led her back to the basement. I went to the sink and spit out a mouthful of blood. I wiped my face with a towel then realized I’d have to sneak that towel into the garbage. Nate got mad when he saw stains on anything.

I spit out more blood, feeling a little nauseous, and stuffed the towel in the garbage before going back to the stove. I closed my eyes. Don’t think. Don’t feel. Do what I’m told and avoid the pain.

I pushed everything away and was completely numb again. My mind was empty as I finished making dinner. Zane took his plate up to his room, and Nate wasn’t home yet. I cleaned up the kitchen and sat at the island counter, blotting blood off of my still bleeding lip.

The basement door opened and Adeline emerged at the top of the stairs wearing a dark purple, silk nightgown that ended mid thigh. Her hair and makeup had been done up. Her green eyes stared blankly ahead.

I couldn’t help but think she looked beautiful.

No.

Not beautiful. Not anything. If she was staying here, being put to work, then she was nothing, too.

I cast my eyes to the ground, swallowing blood and feeling a little sick. She crossed the kitchen and Zane led her upstairs. I blinked back unwelcome emotions as I remembered my first time being sold to a client.

I didn’t know what it meant until an older man with thin gray hair yanked my pants down and threw me onto a bed. I shuddered. I tried so hard to forget it and be empty.

I put my hands on the counter and pushed up, my body aching as I stood. I went into the living room and picked up a book before sitting on the couch. I cleaned the guest room when clients were finished with the girls. The sheets were usually dirty with sweat and semen… and sometimes blood. I used to bleed.

I stared at the page of the Stephen King novel I had read at least ten times, unable to process any of the written words in front of me. Someone knocked on the front door. I set the book down and stood, knees cracking, to answer it. I put my hand on the doorknob then stopped, remember I didn’t know the code to get in or out.

Whoever was outside knocked again. I turned, looking up the stairs. Zane jogged down.

“Will you get out of the way?” he said and pushed me aside. He punched in the code and strode away. I had a few seconds to pull the door open before the access timed out and the code would have to be entered again. Then, once the door was open, I had ten seconds to close it before the alarm sounded.

Travis stood on the covered porch. He pushed past me as soon as I opened the door. He was tall and overweight with a tattoo of a black widow spider on his neck. He tried to keep it hidden, but I’d seen it a time or two when he was leaving and hadn’t bothered to button up his dress shirt or put on his suit jacket.

He was a regular client who usually requested Rochelle. He wouldn’t be happy tonight when he found out he wouldn’t be getting her. Zane could tell him. That wasn’t my job.

I closed the door and heard the electronic lock beep. Travis moved into the house, going directly to the stairs. Zane intercepted.

“Got you a surprise,” Zane told Travis, extending his hand. No one was allowed near the girls until they paid.

“Oh yeah?” Travis said and pulled out his wallet. “What is it?”

“Fresh meat.” The way Zane said it made it sound desirable. Zane was just that way. There was something to him—something dark and evil—that burrowed deep down into people. Once his claws were sunk in, people were hooked. They bought anything and everything he had to say.

He led Travis up the stairs, telling him how the new girl was something to be coveted. I didn’t let myself think about it. I just went back to the couch and sat down, flipping through the book. I had an hour before I was to go upstairs, get Adeline back in the basement, and clean the room.

But only several minutes later, Travis shouted. The guest room door flew open and Travis came down the stairs.

“I didn’t pay for a sick girl,” he complained, eyes drilling into me. I closed the book and didn’t move. His eyes widened, waiting for me to respond. I slowly shook my head. “What the fuck?” he muttered.

I set the book down and stood, dodging past Travis and jogging up the stairs. I had no idea what happened, but if I could get Adeline downstairs and into the basement before Zane blew up, I could save her from a world of pain.

I stopped in the hall, waiting for her to come out of the guest room. She wobbled out as if she were drunk. But her face was set and I could see the determination in her eyes through the terror.

I waved her forward to follow me. I turned and led the way down the stairs and stopped, allowing Adeline to go first as we walked through the living room. Travis stood in the middle of the room, still holding his pants. He glared at us. Adeline wobbled and I reached out to steady her.

“Pathetic,” Travis said to himself, shaking his head.

Adeline stopped so suddenly that I almost ran into her. “Me? Pathetic?” she asked, her head turning to stare down Travis. “Says the guy who has to pay to get laid.”

Her words cut into the tension like a serrated knife. A smile almost formed on my face, but the fear of what might happen to her pulled it down. I covered my laughter by clearing my throat. No one ever talked  back to clients without punishment.

I reached forward and gently urged Adeline forward and into the kitchen.

“You shouldn’t talk like that,” I warned her. “You’ll get yourself hurt.”

She spun around so fast it startled me. Her green eyes flashed. She was scared, so scared, but she held onto her anger.

“I don’t care,” she said.

Her words were a lie. It was something I’d told myself over and over… that I didn’t care. Only my words rang true. I didn’t care. There was nothing left in me to care about.

CHAPTER FIVE

My entire world changed that next day. Adeline tried to escape. And she almost made it. She was almost free.

Almost.

But she was still here, chained to her cot in the basement. I sat on the edge of my bed, holding a towel to my right arm. Nate had blamed me for Adeline running away from her second client. I had done exactly what I was told: take Adeline to the private trailer at the back of the property, wait until she gets in, and leave.

I had done that. Exactly that. And Zane had been there with me, keeping an eye on the whole situation. Still, someone had to be blamed. And a nobody was a good scapegoat. Nate had punished me by pressing a Taser against my side while Zane hit me over and over again in the face.

Then, as I laid on the floor panting and spitting out blood, Zane pulled my arm to the side. Nate took a shiny silver knife from his coat pocket, flicked out the blade, and pressed it to my skin. He pushed the tip of the knife into my skin until blood pooled around the metal.

He didn’t watch my skin tearing open. He didn’t watch the warm blood drip down my skin. He looked into my eyes as he dragged the blade across my flesh, drinking in the pain he was causing.

I used to think Nate was a monster, some sort of evil creature from the horror novels I liked to read. He was worse, much worse. He was human, dark, twisted, and sadistic. There was no demonic energy inside of him, forcing him to do its bidding. No, Nate was evil on his own.

I slowly peeled the towel back from my arm. Little fibers stuck into the sticky scab that was forming over the five lines Nate had carved into my skin. Maybe I shouldn’t have taken a shower. The water had softened the scabs and now I was bleeding again. I needed to wash the blood and sweat off of me, though.

Besides, something jittered through my body, nearly blocking out all the pain. It was something I hadn’t felt since I tried to escape through the woods just like Adeline; only I'd never made it as far as she had.

But if she could do it once, she could do it again. And this time, maybe she wouldn’t get caught and brought back to the house. Maybe this time she could get to freedom. It was worth a try, wasn’t it?

I dropped the towel on the floor as the jittery feeling made its way through me. I closed my eyes and flashes of my failed attempts of escaping played before my eyes. When I finally fell asleep, I didn’t have a nightmare. I always had nightmares.

But that night I dreamed of escaping—of finding some way to start again.

Cold water rushed over my head. Chlorine burned my eyes and my lungs begged for air. I thrashed around wildly, trying to undo the ropes that bound my hands to the white plastic chair.

I couldn’t hear their laughter from under the water, but I knew Zane and his friend, Lou, were standing on the patio by the pool, watching me struggle. Part of me wanted to give up, to go completely still and open my mouth, allowing water to fill my lungs.

Then it would be over.

No. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t want to die. I wasn’t yet sure what I was living for, but there was something… something better than this. I turned my wrist over and slid my hand back, the rough ropes scraping my skin. It instantly burned in the chemical pool water.

As soon as that hand was free, I clawed at the ropes that tied down my other hand. Red dots speckled my vision. Fuck. I was running out of oxygen. Maybe I couldn’t do it. I had to. I bent over, the pressure from being at the bottom of the pool hurting my ears, and yanked my legs free. I kicked off the ropes and pushed up, desperately paddling to the surface.

I wasn’t a good swimmer. I learned how to stay afloat from the many times Zane had thrown me in, seeing how long it would take for me to free myself or drown. I gasped for air as soon as my head popped through the water.

Music and laughter filled the night. Fireworks went off in the distance and the smell of barbecue hung deliciously in the air. Everyone was having fun at the Fourth of July party. Everyone but me of course.

Still gasping and coughing, I ungracefully swam to the pool ladder. My arms burned from the strain and my eyes stung. I blinked, trying to clear my fuzzy vision.

“Pay up,” Zane said with a laugh. “I told you. He’s like a fucking cockroach. He won’t die.”

Lou reached into his pocket. He was tall, with large muscles and dark skin that was covered in tattoos. “Go again?” he said and handed Zane a fist full of cash. “And let me tie the ropes this time.”

Zane shrugged and took a drink of his beer. “Why not?” He flicked his blue eyes to me. “Go get the chair,” he ordered.

I was still panting, still struggling to recover from nearly drowning. I had no strength left. If I got back in the water, I would drown for sure.

“Hey,” another guy called from across the patio. “Got anymore beer?”

“Yeah,” Zane said, flashing his charming smile to a bikini clad girl that lounged on a chair. “We do.” He turned back to me, his smile disappearing. “Go get it.”

I closed my eyes in a long blink and slowly inhaled. My lungs hurt with each breath. Water sloshed off me as I walked to the house. I went into the garage and took off my wet clothes, knowing Nate would have a shit fit—that would end in physical pain for me—if I got water on the hardwood floors. I wrung out my clothes and stepped into the mudroom, throwing them into the washtub. I grabbed dry clothes from the dryer and quickly put them on.

I hadn’t been able to bring Adeline her food yet today. I’d been giving her as much as I could without Nate noticing; although since I did the grocery shopping, I didn’t think he would.

I quickly made her a sandwich and opened the pantry, grabbing fruit cups, cereal bars, and water bottles. I took yogurt and milk from the fridge, set it on the tray and headed downstairs, stopping at the bottom to turn on the light.

Adeline startled, whipping around to face me. Her eyes were swollen and red. She had been crying. An odd feeling surged inside of me, and I wanted to set the tray down and go over to her, sit next to her, and comfort her. I cast my eyes down.

“Sorry,” I said, feeling bad for catching her off guard. I took a few steps toward her. “I brought you food,” I stated, though it was obvious. I felt stupid for saying it. I set the tray of food on the card table and looked at Adeline. There was so much I wanted to say to her, to let her know that she had made it farther than anyone ever had through the woods.

“Thanks,” she said, eyeing the food. The one word of gratitude was nice to hear. No one told me thanks. Ever. “What’s going on out there?” she asked and wrapped her arms around herself.

“Fourth of July party,” I answered ruefully. It was a party. And I was Zane’s entertainment. I motioned behind me. "The pool is on the other side of the house, so I guess you can't hear the music." It was so loud out there, which made the silence of the basement even more unnerving.

"Oh, right,” she said and looked at the food again. I knew she was hungry. Though it wasn’t my fault, I felt bad that I hadn’t been able to bring her the food earlier in the day. I watched her, taking in the way tiredness and fear clung to her face yet she pushed through it, holding onto her anger and determination. She flicked her eyes up, catching me staring. My cheeks flushed, and I diverted my eyes to the ground.

"Well," I asked as I fiddled with a loose string on my shirt. "Can I get you anything else?"

She raised her eyebrows and widened her eyes, staring at me with disbelief. "Get me the fuck out of here," she said.

I couldn’t do that. I didn’t know how to do that. I regretted asking her that question. All it did was drive guilt deeper into me. "S-sorry," I mumbled. "Bad question." My cheeks burned and I shuffled my feet back toward the stairs.

"Jackson!" Zane yelled from up stairs. "What the hell is taking so long? We're out of beer!" Zane yelled. I tensed. Fuck, had I been down here that long? I whirled around and hurried up the stairs. I didn’t want to get thrown in the pool again, not when Adeline had just asked for me to get her out of here.

I wanted to do it, to get her out of the farmhouse. I wanted out of the farmhouse. I stopped dead in my tracks, hand hovering over the handle of the fridge.

For the last few years, I wanted this to end. The only end I saw was through death. I was nothing. A nobody. I had no one or anything to go to. The farmhouse was all I had. Nate told me that many times. If it weren’t for him, there’d be no place for me. This was my life.

But maybe it didn’t have to be.

I spent the morning doing yard work. Then I had to take Lily and Phoebe to clients’ houses, run errands for Nate, and pick up Adeline to take her back to the farmhouse. My body moved on autopilot, getting in the old Blazer and driving to the apartment complex where Adeline was forced to work.

I put the Blazer in park and got out. The sun beat down on me as I crossed the parking lot, going around a group of kids who screamed as they ran through a sprinkler. The door to the old apartment complex was covered in greasy handprints. I pushed it open and stepped into the stuffy lobby. The scent of sweat and water damaged boards hung heavy in the thick air.

Moving forward, I reached into my back pocket and took out a piece of paper. I had scribbled down a list of client address I had to go to today. This was my last one before returning to the farmhouse. I crumpled the paper and let it fall from my hands. I stepped over it and went up a flight of stairs and down the hall, stopping outside the apartment Adeline was in.

I leaned against the wall and waited. If clients went over the time limit they paid for, I had to intervene. It was awkward, and more often than not I walked in on something I didn’t want to see.

I wasn’t wearing a watch. I had no idea how much time was passing. I began to feel anxious. Just when I was about to push off the wall and walk across the hall to the door, it opened and Adeline stepped out

Her brown hair was messy and her eyes were bloodshot. The skin around her wrists was raw, no doubt from being tied up. I hated when I got tied up. I had a regular client who would make me lay face down on the bed and tie my hands and feet to the bedposts as he raped me.

I pushed off the wall, reaching for Adeline. She held her arms close  to her body, looking terrified. She brushed away the tears with the back of her hand and put her head down, dejected.

I didn’t know what to say. Were there even words that could help? I wanted to hug her, to pull her to me and tell her it would be okay. That somehow, someway, it would.

I didn’t want to lie. Instead, I led the way through the apartment without speaking and opened the passenger door to the Blazer for her to get in. I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel as we drove, occasionally taking my eyes off the road to look at Adeline. If my heart hadn’t already been shriveled and dead in the dark cavity of my chest, it would have broken for her.

She looked away from me, trying so hard not to cry. I cried after my first time. The physical pain hurt just as much as the emotional damage. It was something I would never get over, a wound in my soul that would never heal.

It was dark when I pulled into the driveway of the farmhouse. There were no lights on downstairs and Nate’s car wasn’t in the garage. I parked next to Zane’s black Camaro, feeling tempted to bang my door into the shiny metal as I got out.

Adeline walked in front of me without speaking. I punched in the pass code to unlock the front door. I knew the code—for now. I wondered how long it would be before Nate changed it again. What was he so paranoid about? It’s not like I’d try to run away… again. I had nowhere to go.

We went down into the basement. Adeline stiffly walked down the stairs in front of me, her shoulders sagging. Her body shook with a silent sob. She stopped at the base of the stairs, shivering. I paused behind her, eyebrows pushed together, watching.

Should I hug her? No, touching wasn’t something she would want right now. Maybe just take her hand? No, not that either. I didn’t know what to say. I swallowed and walked around her, going to Phoebe.

“I’ll bring food down later,” I told her. She nodded and flicked her eyes to Adeline. I frowned and nodded. Phoebe closed her eyes in a long blink. I pulled my lips over my teeth and turned, plodding back up the stairs.

I turned the lights on in the kitchen and stood in front of the sink. I knew I needed to eat since I hadn’t eaten all day. My stomach churned and I wasn’t hungry. For years, I’d been empty inside. Nothing but a hollow shell, just a body that was good for doing physical labor and nothing else.

But pain started to swirl inside of me, and it wasn’t the typical pain I was used to. I didn’t feel the dull ache for myself. I felt it for Adeline. I felt it for everything she had been through… and everything else she would be going through.

I felt it for Phoebe, who left her friends and family behind in another country in search of a better life. And for young Lily, who came from nothing in hopes of a family. And even for Rochelle, who was so mentally twisted by Zane she had no idea this wasn’t what she wanted.

I hadn’t felt pain like this—pain that wasn’t physical in a very long time. I blinked, seeing Adeline’s green eyes filled with tears. What was it about her that brought out this emotion?

I took a deep breath. It didn’t matter. It shouldn’t matter. But it did.

She did.

CHAPTER SIX

I straightened up, back aching. I pushed myself to my feet and grabbed the pole with both hands. Harsh fluorescent lights shone off the metal. It was weird to see the club like this. It was early in the day, and Paradise wasn’t open for business just yet. I gave the pole a shake. It didn’t budge. I leaned back, testing it with my weight.

Deciding it was safely in place, I gathered up the tools and jumped down off the stage, heading to the back to put everything away. Tonight was busy for the club. There was something about the costumes that brought in more customers on Halloween.

“Hey Jax,” Bernard, the cook, called as I walked past the kitchen.

I turned my head up, brushing my hair back with my arm. “Hey,” I replied.

Bernard was in his late fifties. He was overweight and drank every time he worked. He stayed past his shift almost every night, taking a girl into the private rooms. And he was married.

“Whatcha doing here so early?” he asked.

“Fixed the pole,” I said, unable to look him in the eye. It was hard for me to talk to anyone, really. I wasn’t supposed to and being around people caused anxiety.

“Ah, gotcha. It was wobbly last night.” He nodded. “I’m trying something new,” he said and pointed to the pile of ground beef on the counter in the kitchen. “Wanna give it a taste test?”

“Sure,” I said. I was hungry. Nate hadn’t allowed me time to eat breakfast this morning before he set me to work. “I’m going to…” I started to say, but then trailed off, walking away before I finished my sentence. I could feel Bernard’s eyes on me as I hurried away.

I took my time putting each tool back on the shelf. I stopped to use the bathroom on the way back. The lights flickered and buzzed when I turned them on. The heater had been turned off over night and the bathroom was cold.

I accidentally looked at my reflection when I was washing my hands. Seeing the man in the mirror was startling. I didn’t like to look at myself. Why should I? I was nothing. But when I caught my reflection, I couldn’t look away.

I supposed it was weird to not know what I really looked like. My reflection was older than I expected. My hair was too long, and purple circles under my eyes matched the bruises on the rest of my body. I had several scars on my neck, and my cheeks were sunburned from raking leaves in the fall sun yesterday.

But it was the emptiness in my dark brown eyes that got to me the most. Did I always look like this? I couldn’t remember not feeling this way, not since I was sold to Nate. My heart ached to be back with the Lunsford’s, the foster family that welcomed me like I was really family.

I wondered what they were doing, if they even remembered me anymore. They were sad when I left, but surely by now they had moved on with their lives, right? I closed my eyes, turning my head down. When I opened my eyes, I was staring at the running water. I washed the soap off my hands and grabbed a paper towel, drying them as I walked back into the kitchen.

Bernard had a burger and fries ready on the counter. Nothing looked different. I kept my eyes on the floor, watching the worn carpet pass by my feet.

“Whatcha want to drink?” Bernard asked and leaned on the counter.

“Water,” I mumbled.

“Just water, huh?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “How ‘bout a Coke?”

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

“Got it. Coming right up.” He turned to get the drink. “Go on and have a seat. I’ll bring everything out to ya.”

I left Paradise with a full stomach. I’d eaten the food there before. There was nothing different about the burger and fries Bernard served me. Was he just trying to be nice?

If he was… why? The back of my neck prickled with nerves. If he suspected anything, it would be my fault. My fault I didn’t act normal enough when in public, my fault I didn’t hide the bruises or make up a believable story.

There was no way that Zane would find out, right? I opened the door to the Blazer and got in, sticking the key into the ignition. Still, I felt guilty, like I had done something I shouldn’t have.

Deep down, I knew how messed up this all was. Eating a burger and fries was harmless. If someone found out I had been sold and held captive, it wasn’t my fault. And yet years of mental and physical abuse took its toll. I almost believed it.

Almost.

I drove back to the farmhouse, my mind flashing back the entire time. I came here defeated, already feeling unwanted. I fought tooth and nail for several years before it became too much. I allowed myself to shut down, to block everything out, and to become invisible.

I didn’t want to admit it, but for a while I thought that was all that I was, all I could ever be. But now… now I thought there might be more. What had changed?

I put the Blazer in park and got out, walking toward the garage. When had I stopped being dead to the world? When had I decided that I wanted out… that I wanted more?

I opened the door and took off my shoes. I walked through the kitchen, eyes flicking to the basement door.

Adeline.

She was what changed. Seeing her never faltering resolve and will to leave had breathed new life into me.

“What the fuck took you so long?” Zane said, standing up from the living room couch. He zipped his pants and buckled his belt. A thin woman with blonde hair and bloodshot eyes shakily rose to her feet, wiping her mouth.

I didn’t know why Zane would have wanted me back any sooner. It seemed like I had perfect timing.

“I wasn’t gone that long. And I was working, obviously,” I spat before I realized what I was saying.

Zane’s blue eyes widened, surprised and angry I replied with anything other than “sorry” or a blank stare followed by me cowering. He looked behind him at the girl. She wavered on her feet, and I could smell the smoke on her clothes from all the way over here.

I cast my eyes down and tried to walk past Zane and go into my room. He shoulder bumped me, grabbing my wrist and pulling me close. His fingers dug into my skin. He put his mouth close to my ear.

“I don’t like your attitude,” he whispered, his tone threatening. I didn’t think my response could be considered “an attitude” by any means. Though to Zane, anything less than groveling was bad.

He puffed out his chest and let me go, shoving me backwards. I stumbled but caught myself. Zane turned to the woman, putting his arm around her. They sat back on the couch and I hurried up the stairs.

Later that day, Zane called me downstairs to take the girls to their clients. I heard the latch fall free from the outside of my door. I set my book down and got off the bed. Every once in a while, I had a quiet day like today. I got my work done in the morning and spent the rest of the time in my room. Granted, I was locked in without food, but I was alone and I wasn’t getting beaten up.

I opened the door and got blasted in the face with pepper spray. My arms went over my head, trying to block it. I closed my eyes, which burned and watered right away. I wheezed, unable to breath as the pepper filled my lungs. I could hear Zane laughing as I struggled to  breathe.

My nostrils felt like I had breathed in fire, I gasped, taking in more pepper spray as I desperately gulped in air. The floor vibrated as Zane walked away, still laughing. Blinded and gasping for air, I threw my arms out, feeling my way back into my room. I bumped into the door and tripped over my box of books.

My knees hit the hardwood, and my head whacked into the dresser. I was still wheezing and gasping for air. I couldn’t open my eyes. They were watering like crazy and my nose started to run as well. I clambered up the dresser, using it to pull myself to my feet, and felt my way into the bathroom.

I turned on the sink and splashed cold water in my eyes. I forced them open and it stung even more. I cupped water in my hands and plunged my face down, opening my eyes to rinse them out. I repeated the process several times with no relief.

“Jackson!” Nate bellowed from downstairs.

My head jerked up. I grabbed a towel and dried off my face before I turned the water off. My eyes burned. I opened them; my vision was fuzzy, barely able to see, so I felt along the wall and slowly walked into the hall.

Nate was standing at the bottom of the stairs. “You know you—” he cut off when I came into view. “What the hell happened?” he asked and leaned forward. “And what is that smell?”

“Pepper spray,” I said, grasping the railing.

“Zane,” Nate said calmly. “Get in here. Now.” I froze, holding onto the railing for dear life. “What did you do?” he asked Zane.

Zane laughed, turning his face up to me. “I wanted to see if getting sprayed was as bad as people say it is.” He laughed again. “What do you think, loser?”

“It’s bad,” I mumbled.

I saw Nate cross his arms and look at his watch. “He can’t see, can you, Jackson?”

I shook my head. “No… not yet.”

Nate turned back to Zane. “If he can’t see, he can’t drive. You have to take the girls tonight.”

Zane’s lip turned up in growl and he glared at me. “I have a party—”

Nate held up his hand. “That’s not my problem. My problem is getting the girls to work on time. You have to handle it.” He looked at his watch again. “Wash out your eyes, Jackson. I need you to be able to see by tomorrow.” He shook his head and sighed. Nate didn’t care that I was in pain or that Zane was a sadistic fuck. He cared about my ability to work, like I was an object. If I lost value or couldn’t do my job, I didn’t doubt he would kill me.

I turned around and shuffled back into my room while Zane continued to throw a temper tantrum. Once in my room, I pulled my shirt over my head, sniffling my dripping nose. I unbuckled my jeans and stepped out of them. I turned on the shower and pulled down my boxers, getting into the shower before the water was warm. I tipped my head up and flushed out my eyes. The water hurt, but I knew it would wash away the burn eventually.

Zane would be pissed when he got home. I had heard him talking about some party for a few days now, and he was going to miss it… or be late. And of course, it would be my fault. I dreaded what he would do to me.

When I finally got out of the shower, my skin was wrinkly. I got dressed and apprehensively tried my door. It wasn’t locked.

Had Nate left in too much of a hurry to remember to lock me in? And where was he anyway? I shook my head, locks of wet, dark hair falling into my face. I pushed it back, wishing I could cut it, and stepped into the hall.

The house was quiet. I slipped down the stairs, vision still hazy but I was able to see. Only one lock on the basement door was in place. I slid back the dead bolt and pulled open the door. It creaked a bit on the hinges, the sound harrowing as it echoed down the stairs.

All the lights were off. I put my foot on the top step and listened. At first I didn’t hear anything. I assumed all the girls were gone, working. Then I heard someone cough. I went down the stairs and turned on the light.

Phoebe was curled up on her cot, shivering under the thin quilt. Her olive skin was pale and she had dark circles under her eyes.

“Phoebe?” I whispered and crossed the dim basement. Wind rattled the small window, the draft coming right through. Grit stuck to the bottom of my feet. “Phoebe, are you okay?”

Her eyes fluttered open. She sat up, looking confused. Then she looked at me. “I sick,” she said as she pushed herself up. She closed her eyes and swayed. “Head hurt.”

I hurried over to her, kneeling in front of her just in time to keep her from tumbling off the cot.

“You’re burning up,” I said when my hands touched her skin. She put her hand on my shoulder to steady herself. “I’m going to get you some medicine, hang on.”

“No,” she said and shook her head. “You get in trouble.”

“Only if I get caught,” I added ruefully and stood, noticing dark splotches on Phoebe’s hands. My stomach churned. I had seen those same markings on girls before… and it never ended well for them. “It’s just Tylenol,” I said. “No one will notice.”

“Jackson,” she started. “No. Me no want you get hurt.” Her accent was thicker than normal, and she said each word slowly, as if it took effort for her to recall the words in English.

I was already on my feet. “I’ll be right back,” I said and hurried up the stairs. I paused in the kitchen, deciding to heat up a can of chicken noodle soup while I dashed up the stairs to get medicine from the bathroom. If I took the whole bottle, Nate would notice. But he wouldn’t notice a few pills.

I poured them into my hand and went back downstairs just in time to take the soup out of the microwave. The bowl was so hot it burned my fingers as I carried it down the stairs.

“Too much,” Phoebe said when she saw me walk toward  her. “You get in trouble.” Her eyes latched onto the warm soup and she licked her lips. I pulled an overturned milk carton over and set the soup down. I handed Phoebe the pills and picked up a water bottle from the card table in the center of the basement, twisting off the cap.

She swallowed the pills then moved on to the soup, eating it fast. I sat on the cot across from her, waiting. I came down once a week to do the girls’ laundry. The laundry bin was already full even though I had washed their clothes and blankets two days ago. I thought about taking it upstairs now but decided against it. Nate liked his schedules.

“I feel better,” Phoebe said and put the spoon in the empty bowl. “Take upstairs,” she said and handed them both to me. “You no get in trouble.”

I nodded. “I won’t. No one’s home yet.” I sighed, looking at Phoebe. I was unable to push the sick feeling away.

“You should go,” she said, eyes darting to the stairs. “In case come home.”

I shrugged. “I’ll hear the door open.”

Phoebe reached out and touched my arm. “Not worth risk.”

I put my hand on top of hers. “I’m sorry, Phoebe. I wish I could help you.”

She pressed her lips together in a tight smile. “Not your fault,” she said. “I miss talking to you.”

I nodded. As much as I liked having a room upstairs, it was lonely. Zane got jealous the other girls talked to me so  I was moved into the spare room upstairs. Zane wanted to keep me in the shed out back, but Nate didn’t see that as practical. I was locked in the house but still able to cook and clean and do whatever else Nate wanted me to do.

“You eyes okay?” she asked, leaning forward.

“Yeah. Zane, uh, sprayed me with pepper spray.”

She gently touched my cheek. “Look painful.”

“Nah,” I said with a shrug. “It’ll be red for a while.”

She nodded and crossed her arms. “I hate it here.”

“Me too,” I spat.

Phoebe looked at me, wide-eyed. She blinked and took in a deep breath. “Good to hear you say it. Again.”

I nodded, but my brow furrowed. It had been a while since I voiced, well, anything.

“You go before you get in trouble,” she said and closed her eyes in a long blink.

I stood. “And you need to rest.” I pulled the quilt off the bed I was sitting on and tucked it around Phoebe’s small body. “I’ll bring you more medicine tomorrow if you need it.”

She just nodded and closed her eyes. I grabbed the bowl and the spoon and went upstairs. I cleaned the kitchen and nervously looked around the house. Nothing had been assigned to me. I had no jobs to do.

I just stood there, unmoving, for a few minutes. That didn’t happen often. In fact, I don’t think this had ever happened. If Zane hadn’t sprayed me with pepper spray, I would be chauffeuring the girls around. I’d have a purpose.

I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling worthless.

“No,” I said out loud. That wasn’t right. It was something Nate had drilled into my head, something I fought so hard not to believe. The words had seeped into me over time, and I felt as if they were true.

Not anymore.

I took a step forward. Still, I didn’t know what to do. The house was clean, there was no one to cook for, and I didn’t know the current code to go outside and do yard work. I took a breath, got myself a glass of water, and sat in the living room with my book in hand.

I only made it a few chapters when the front door flew open. Zane burst in, his blue eyes clouded over in rage. Adeline was right behind him, dressed like a witch. It must be Halloween. She paused in the foyer, her eyes full of spirit.

For months, she’d hung onto the anger. But tonight, tonight there was something else. Tonight she looked hopeful. My heart skipped a beat. I swallowed the lump in my throat and leaned forward.

Zane turned around, slamming the front door as hard as he could. It rattled the wall and a picture fell, the glass shattering as it hit the floor. I blinked, my mind flashing to my dad throwing a glass plate against the wall when I was just a child.

“Clean it up,” Zane growled and stomped up the stairs.

“Everything okay?” I shakily asked, folding my page over and closing the book.

“When will you learn to stop asking me that?” Adeline snapped, shaking her head. She held her chin up as she walked, but I was able to see the tears glistening in her green eyes. I stood, opening my mouth to say something else, something better.

I didn’t know what to say. I closed my mouth and watched her walk through the kitchen. She paused at the basement door. Shit. I didn’t lock it when I came up. It shouldn’t matter… it wasn’t like Adeline was going to turn me in to Nate or Zane.

I set the book down and hurried to the closet to get out a broom and dustpan. I wanted to clean up this mess and disappear into my room as soon as possible. There was no telling what Zane would do when he was this pissed. I dumped the glass into the trash and put the broken frame in a bag on the counter. Then I scrambled to my room.

Most of the time, Zane liked to inflict physical pain. He got satisfaction from hurting me with his own hands. Other times he hurt me a bit more passively, like the time he forced me to drink dish soap. And then there were the times when he made me do things that were just degrading, like forcing me to touch the girls.

I sat on my bed waiting. The calm before the storm was worse… sometimes. My fear grew as each second ticked by.

My door flew open. Zane stormed in, fists already clenched. Something flickered through me and I had the urge to curl my own fingers in and take a swing.

Zane was faster. He swung his arm at me, hitting me hard on the side of the head. I fell to my side and he grabbed my ankles, yanking me off the bed. I landed hard, knocking the wind out of me.

Zane straddled me and wrapped his hands around my neck.

“This is your fault,” he said through gritted teeth as he choked me. “Always your fault.”

My hands flew to Zane’s wrists. I struggled for air and tried to pull him off of me. Black dots spotted my vision. My ears rang. I was close to passing out.

Then the front door opened and closed.

“Zane,” Nate’s calm voice came from downstairs.

Zane lifted my neck off the ground and shook me before letting go. My head whacked back against the hardwood floor. He stood and kicked me—hard—in between my legs before he went downstairs to Nate.

Fuck. We must be in some really deep shit. And by we, I meant Zane. No, by Zane, I meant me. Because whatever Zane did would fall on me. It always did.

CHAPTER SEVEN

I knew what had happened as soon as I served the girls breakfast the next morning. A newspaper article had been saved and carefully folded and set out on the kitchen counter. Nate told me to bring it down and make sure Adeline saw it, but not to let her keep the paper than was longer than necessary.

I couldn’t read the entire article while Nate was in the room. But the title said it all. MAN FOUND DEAD IN PARKING LOT. There was only one reason that would be shown to Adeline.

Nate was using the murder as a threat.

That was way Zane came home in a rage. That was why he never took his anger out on me. Nate must have punished him.

Nate didn’t care if Zane killed people. Zane strangled a girl a few years ago who’d repeatedly tried to run away. He had made me watch… and then bury the body in the woods.

No, Nate wasn’t bothered by death. He was bothered by getting caught. And a very public murder like this was risky. Really fucking risky.

And it had to do with Adeline… that much I was sure. I stuck the paper on the tray of food and went downstairs. Lily, Adeline, and Rochelle were sleeping. Phoebe slowly walked away from the toilet, using the shower to wash her hands since there wasn’t a sink down there.

“How are you feeling?” I asked her right away and set the tray down on the card table.

“Better,” she said. I thought she looked worse. The circles under her eyes were darker and she wobbled when she walked. I put a hand out to steady her.

“Do you know what happened with Adeline last night?” I whispered and led her to her cot.

Phoebe sank down and nodded. “Client knew who she was. Missing girl. Zane shoot him.”

Even though I knew something drastic had happened, that still took me off guard.

“People are still looking for her,” I said to myself.

Phoebe nodded. “With big reward.”

I bit my lip and looked at Adeline. She almost looked peaceful as she slept. I wondered how that felt, to be wanted. And wanted enough that people would pay to have you back.

“Wow.” I shook my head. “Zane messed up big time.”

Phoebe nodded and narrowed her eyes. “What happen your neck?”

I shrugged, almost forgetting that Zane choked me out last night. “Nothing. I’m fine.”

She widened her eyes. “Yeah. Fine… in this place.”

I frowned and cast my eyes down. “I should go. I’ll be back in a while though to get the paper.”

Phoebe nodded. “Okay.” She fell back onto her thin pillow.

Back upstairs, Zane sat at the breakfast table, waiting for me to serve him food. He scowled and glared but didn’t say anything. He almost looked embarrassed when Nate came into the room. I pretended not to notice.

Once the kitchen was clean, I went to the basement door and unlocked it. I set each foot down heavily as I walked down the stairs. I wanted the girls to know I was coming. Zane would sneak down here just to scare them.

Adeline was standing near the card table holding the paper. She had that fiery look in her eyes again. Her dark hair fell in a tangled mess around her face. I never noticed before just how pretty she was. Her cheekbones where high and well-defined; everything about her was so delicate.

"I'm supposed to take the newspaper," I said apologetically, bringing my eyes up to hers. My stomach flip flopped as we locked gazes. "Nate doesn't want you reading anything."

Her face fell, putting some of that fire out. “Okay," she sighed and extended her arm to give me the paper.

I noticed a tattoo on her wrist. At first it looked like geometric shapes, then I noticed something familiar about the triangle, circle, and straight line. I almost smiled. “That’s my favorite.”

“Huh?” she asked, and then followed my eyes to her wrist.

“I love all the Harry Potter books,” I told her, feeling myself blush. “But the Deathly Hallows was my favorite.” A small smile pulled up my lips. “Though I kinda hated it for being the last one.”

Stunned, she looked at me without speaking for several seconds. “Yeah. Me too.” She blinked several times and shook her head. She brushed her hair back behind her ear.

“I think I read it over a dozen times,” I confessed.

She gave me a half smile. “I read it a few times, too. And cried every time.” Her eyes met mine again with the small smile still on her face. Then she moved them down, studying the bruises. I suddenly felt self-conscious as her eyes slowly trailed down the rest of my body.

“The movies are good, too,” she said and looked away. “One of the rare instances where the book to film conversion wasn’t butchered.”

“I haven’t seen them all,” I said. Like Nate would let me watch movies.

“Seriously?” she asked, eyes opening wide again

“Yes,” I said and folded the newspaper in half several times. I felt awkward just standing there.

“Oh. Well… you should.”

“I didn’t want to read anything else after I finished that series,” I said as I twisted the paper in my hands.

Her eyes brightened and she leaned forward just a bit. “Total book hangover.”

“Book hangover?” I asked. What was she talking about?

Her eyebrows went up. “Yeah. You know, when you get hung up on a book.”

“Oh, right.” Right, duh. She must think I am stupid. Never mind that, I knew exactly what she was talking about. “I love that books can do that. Affect you so much, I mean.”

“Yes,” she gushed. “I do too. Books are dangerous. They pull you in and make you fall in love or totally destroy you. For the time being, of course. Then you finish it and those feelings linger around in agony until you start another and the whole process happens again.” She let out a breath and looked at me, looking a tiny bit afraid.

Blood rushed to my cheeks again. I mumbled a goodbye and turned to go up the stairs, wishing I could have stayed and talked to her longer.

As the next two months passed, Adeline’s drive to leave never faltered. Knowing that her family was still looking fueled her desire to leave. I knew she was looking for any opportunity to run. And Nate knew it too; he made it very difficult, if not impossible. She never left the house.

Today was Christmas Eve. I had been cooking and baking all day with no breaks. Nate made me get up at three AM to start so everything would be done on time. His sister and her family were coming for a holiday dinner.

The situation was so fucked up. Nate’s sister knew nothing about his underground sex slave business. She had kids, kids that called Nate “uncle” and ran into his arms. I’d met her once, on accident. She had come by the house to drop something off to Nate and I answered the door.

Like Nate, she was tall and blonde. She was a bit on the heavy side but had kind eyes. It was crazy to think that they came from the same family.

Tonight, Nate was making us—all of us—hide in the tool shed out back. Since Rochelle was going to be out there too, she had convinced Zane to plug in a space heater so she could stay warm. Zane agreed, not to appease Rochelle, but because he didn’t want the girls getting frostbitten fingers. It wouldn’t be good for business.

I put a plate of cookies on the table and stood, rolling my sore shoulders. The floor creaked above me, and Rochelle’s loud moans filtered through Zane’s closed door. I glanced at the clock. Zane better hurry up. Oh well, that wasn’t my problem.

I unlocked the basement door, plodding down the stairs. I stopped at the bottom of the steps, scanning the basement. My eyes met Adeline’s. I had an urge to rush over to her and hug her. My cheeks reddened as she looked back at me, like she could read my thoughts. I quickly looked away.

“I need you to follow me,” I said to cover up my embarrassment. “Dress warm.” I crossed my arms, pulling them close to my body. Phoebe and Lily got up right away, going over to the clothes than hung on a pipe. Nothing was practical; it was all tight, short, and low cut. They would have to put on multiple layers to be warm enough for this cold Iowa evening.

Adeline stayed on her cot, watching the other girls get dressed. Right… she hadn’t left the house in months, not since she had been recognized. She didn’t think she would be leaving now, even though we were just going outside into the yard.

“You too, Adeline,” I said gently. For once, being in the basement was better. Her head jerked up, eyes meeting mine in question. I frowned and nodded, letting her know that yes, she had to follow.

I watched as she pulled on random pieces of clothing, not caring how she looked. It made me happy. I wanted her to be as warm as possible and seeing her mismatch her clothes was like sticking it to Nate… in a very passive way. I turned, leading the way upstairs. I grabbed my coat and walked through the kitchen.

“Addie, no!” I heard Phoebe whisper. I turned to see Adeline eyeing a platter full of sweet rolls. If I could, I would sneak one down to her later. I cast my eyes down and punched in the code to go out through the garage.

The evening air was cold. The breeze wasn’t strong but it cut right through my thin coat and worn out boots. I scanned the backyard, feeling like someone was out in the woods, watching me. When I was just a kid here, Nate made up stories of men with guns standing guard in the woods. I believed him for several years, his words mixing with images of mafia guards I’d seen in movies.

Snow crunched under my feet. There was just enough to cover the grass, blanketing the farmhouse lawn in soft, fluffy white. It muted everything, made everything look safe and serene.

“Where are we going?” Lily asked. “I didn’t think the path to the trailer was plowed.”

“It’s not,” I said. Nate would make me plow it tomorrow. Well, not really plow it. He would make me do the entire path by hand. Then he’d walk up and down it, inspecting the frozen ground. If the trail wasn’t cleared to perfection, I’d have to shovel it again.

There was no point; no one used the trailer in the winter. It was too cold. I zipped up my jacket as I walked across the patio, watching snow fall off my boots as I lifted each foot. The breeze picked up, blowing tiny pieces of snow into my face. I closed my eyes, waiting for the blast to end.

I had spent the morning hanging up lights around the yard. My fingers were so cold by the time I was done I was sure I’d have frost bite. I had to run them under warm water in the kitchen for minutes just to get the feeling back. The cold air caused my fingertips to ache almost instantly.

I hesitated at the edge of the patio, eyeing the storage shed. I didn’t want to go in there. I didn’t want to be locked up in a fucking shed like I was some sort of animal. I wanted to be inside, in my room, with a plate of food.

Wait. Fuck that. I did want my room, my own room. I wanted the picture-perfect Christmas lights to burst into flames and I wanted to watch the farmhouse burn with Nate and Zane inside. The anger inside of me bubbled up. It was startling, but it also felt good in an odd way.

I unlocked the shed, and opened the door. The shed was clean, like every fucking thing else around here. Despite the cold, the smell of cut grass still hung in the air. I stepped aside, letting the girls go in first.

“No,” Adeline said, shaking her head. She stopped, crossing her arms as she stared into the shed.

“Nate wants us all to stay in here,” I explained. She needed to get in. Fast. Or else Nate would send Zane out here to force Adeline in the shed.

“I don’t care,” she said, eyes wide. “I don’t want to be locked in.” Phoebe took Adeline’s hand, giving her a gently tug

“You won’t be locked in,” I said. And we wouldn’t be, not really. The door couldn’t lock from the inside. “I’ll be in there with you,” I said. As I stared into her green eyes, something inside of me stirred. I didn’t want anything to happen to Adeline. I had no idea how I’d protect her when, hell, I couldn’t protect myself. But I wanted to try.

Phoebe turned, her dark, tired eyes begging. She gave Adeline another tug forward. “Please, Addie. It cold out here. Don’t get hurt,” she said. “Come in with me.”

Adeline sighed but followed behind Phoebe. Mentally, I let out a sigh of relief. I grabbed a flashlight from the shelf, clicked it on, and then put it back down. It didn’t offer much light, but it was enough to see the tools that hung around us so we could avoid an accident.

The girls circled around the space heater. Lily stuck out her hands and frowned; it hadn’t been plugged in yet and wasn’t warm. I stepped into the opening of the shed, pushing snow around until I found the end of an extension chord. I leaned over to pick it up, and then shook the snow off before plugging in the space heater. I shut the door as much as possible.

I moved back into the shed, getting close to the heater. It would take a few minutes to warm up.

Lily flicked her blue eyes up at me. “You gonna tell us why we’re out here?” she asked.

I nodded. “Nate’s sister and her family are in town,” I said. “They’re coming over for Christmas dinner. He doesn’t want us in the house.”

Saying the words out loud suddenly angered me. I caught a glimpse of Adeline’s face. I think it angered her more…

“That’s fucking bullshit!” she spat. I looked at her, surprised and impressed with the passion in her voice. And she was right. This was bullshit…fucking bullshit. Nate was in the house, safe and warm, with his family. He was eating the food that I had spent all day preparing but wasn’t allowed to eat.

Adeline’s fingers curled into fists. Her eyes glowed with anger. “He gets to sit in there and act all normal and be warm and eat good food while we freeze our asses off huddled around a little heater in a shed!”

“Act normal?” Lily questioned, her blue eyes wide.

“Yeah, normal,” Adeline said, shaking her head. “Or at least like a decent human being.”

“What do you mean?” Lily asked and my stomach flip-flopped. Did she really not know what Adeline was talking about?

“His sister doesn’t know what he does,” Adeline said. “If she did, he wouldn’t have to hide us outside.”

“Oh,” Lily said, looking down. I watched the emotions flash across her face. Somewhere, she still knew this was wrong, that she didn’t want to be here. A runaway, Lily had nowhere else to go. When Zane took her in, she thought he was doing her a favor. Lily wasn’t dumb; she quickly learned the truth and wanted out.

Then something changed, the way it always did with the girls. Her spirit was broken and she allowed herself to get brainwashed. Thinking that she wanted to be here—just like Rochelle—was better than dealing with the truth.

“What he’s doing is illegal,” she finally said.

“And immoral, and degrading, and objectifying, and—” Adeline spat, cutting off when headlights illuminated the road in front of the house. I peered out the shed, unable to see the make or model of the vehicle that pulled into the driveway. The back door of the house opened and slammed shut. My heart skipped a beat and my first thought was that Nate knew I had thought about hurting him. I closed my eyes in a long blink. Sometimes I felt like Lily, so broken down from fear illogical thoughts plagued my mind.

Rochelle pulled the shed door open and stepped in, closing it behind her. She squeezed in next to me. Her clothes smelled like Zane’s cologne. It twisted my stomach and burned my nose. Just smelling it made me anxious. It was like he was right here in the shed with me.

I turned my head the other way, looking away from the door. I didn’t want to breathe in the scent of Zane if I could help it. The shed door slowly creaked open. Thinking it was the wind, I didn’t hurry to close it. But when I saw Adeline rushing out, I ran.

She had a snowball in her hand and her eyes were set on the kitchen window. Fuck. She was going to throw it and get Nate’s sister’s attention.

No. She would get herself hurt if not killed. I couldn’t let her do this.

Without thinking, I lunged toward her, wrapping my fingers around her arm. I was too late. The snowball flew through the air but had been knocked off course. It hit the side of the house in a thud then crumbled onto the ground.

“What are you doing?” I asked, heart racing in fear. I pulled Adeline to me. I could see it in my head, Nate and Zane rushing to the window. Or worse, one of Nate’s nieces or nephews!

“Let me go!” Adeline screamed. I put my hand over her mouth to muffle her shouts. I held onto her and sank to the ground, praying we would move out of the line of sight. I moved on top of Adeline, blocking her from view. If someone did look out and see us, they would only see me and not her.

“Adeline,” I whispered. “Stop! You’re going to get yourself hurt!” My heart thumped with desperation in my ears and a nervous sweat broke out on my skin, itchy under my coat. She struggled against me, so angry at Nate that she didn’t care.

“Addie!” Phoebe called from inside the shed. “Stop!” Her dark eyes were wide with fear. Adeline’s face tightened but she stopped moving. She closed her eyes and looked defeated. I hated seeing her like that. I scrambled to my feet and picked her up with ease, hurrying back to the shed. I set her down next to the heater and closed the door with my foot.

I reached out to brush the snow from Adeline’s hair. She jerked away, scowling at me. I let my hand fall to my side, feeling a little hurt.

“What the hell was that?” Rochelle snapped and reached out, shoving Adeline’s shoulder with her fingertips.  “You want to get us all in trouble?”

“If trouble gets us out of here, then yes,” she said slowly, looking into Rochelle’s eyes.

“You look scary,” Lily said, pulling her arms close to her body.

Adeline blinked and let go of some of her anger. She shook her head. “I want to go home,” she said quietly.

“You can’t go home, dipshit!” Rochelle said. “We went over this, remember?”

I stared at Rochelle, wanting to tell her not to talk to Adeline like that. I opened my mouth but Adeline beat me to it.

“Fine,” she said. “I want out of here. I want to get us all out of here.”

I felt my heart flutter. That was what I wanted too. I wanted it so bad it hurt. I had nowhere to go, but anywhere was better than here, right?

“Whatever,” Rochelle said, flipping her hand out at Adeline. “If you’re so high and mighty, make sure you tell Nate that you were the one who threw that snowball so only your ass gets beat.”

No. That wasn’t going to happen. I stared at Adeline, taking in her determination. That wasn’t happening. I wasn’t going to allow her to get in trouble, not if I could help it. She was brave. It made me want to be brave too. I wasn’t able to be brave for myself. But for her…I thought I could do it.

My jeans were wet with melted snow. The cold seeped into my bones, making me shiver. There wasn’t a spot close enough to the heater and I didn’t want to make any of the girls move. I crossed my arms tightly over my chest, sticking my hands inside my bent elbows for warmth.

Tension was high in the shed for the rest of the night. My feet ached from standing by the time the minivan pulled down the driveway. I waited another minute before I led the way back into the house. I could see Adeline out of the corner of my eyes, walking stiffly. Her face was taught with fear. Phoebe looked too tired to be afraid and Lily looked as if she might cry.

Nate and Zane were waiting for us in the kitchen. Zane’s eyes glimmered like he was a kid on Christmas morning. Nate removed his watch, handing it to Zane. Fuck. My heart pounded in my throat. I was doing this; there was no backing down now. Nate’s eyes slid over every one of us as he rolled up his sleeves. I shuffled to the side, locking eyes with Adeline for a millisecond. As soon as our eyes met, I moved my head up and down, trying to let her know it was going to be okay.

“Who is the fucking idiot who hit the side of the house?” Nate demanded, his eerie calm gone. The vein in his head pulsed with each beat of his black heart. He unbuckled his belt, slowly pulling the length of leather through each loop.

I set my jaw. Not the belt. Not again. My breath quickened. I looked at Adeline again. Her cheeks were flush with fear and her nostrils flared as she sucked in a nervous breath.

“Oh, so none of you know what the hell happened out there?” Nate went on. “Very well,” he said and folded his belt in half, loudly snapping the thick leather. The crack echoed through the house. “You can all be equally punished.”

It was now or never. The beating that was coming would be painful, one of the worst I’d had in a while. My heart pounded and my palms sweat. I saw Adeline take in a breath and open her mouth.

No. Not her.

I stepped forward. “I did it,” I said.

CHAPTER EIGHT

“You?” Nate asked in disbelief, staring right at me.

“Yes, me,” I said as definitely as I could, looking Nate right in the eye.

“Why?” Nate demanded, narrowing his eyes.

My heart pounded. Sweat dripped down my back, which was already wet from wrestling Adeline to the ground in the snow. I hadn’t thought this far ahead. Fuck. “I was knocking down icicles. I was bored,” I blurted, adding a shrug for believability.

“Well,” Nate said calmly. “That boredom cost you.” I could see the anger burning in his eyes. He looked over the girls. “I want this kitchen clean by the time I’m done,” he told them then looked back at me. “Come with me.”

My fingers curled into fists. I didn’t want to come with Nate. I wanted to grab his shoulders and shove his head into the wall, over and over, until his skull cracked and blood and brain oozed out. Nate’s eyes met mine as if he was challenging me to do so. I could feel Zane’s dark presence behind me. A little voice inside my head reminded me that Zane had a gun hidden under his shirt. And my disobedience could cause the girls to get hurt. Nate loved to punish me by punishing them…

I set my jaw and slowly moved out of the room. Nate took a few steps backwards, keeping his eyes locked with mine before he turned. As soon as we were in the dining room, he raised his arm and whipped me with the belt. He had moved so fast I wasn’t ready. The leather cracked against my arm. It took a second for the pain to register. Then it webbed out, moving across my entire arm.

Nate whipped me again. The end of the belt caught me in the face. He whipped me again, several times in a row. The leather hurt each and every time it hit my skin. Blood dripped down my cheek. I closed my eyes, shielding my head with my hands.

Anger built up inside of me, growing stronger and stronger with the pain. The belt cracked against me, stinging my neck. I grunted at the red hot pain. It was so intense I almost couldn’t breathe. This was it. I wasn’t doing this anymore.

Then Zane rushed into the room. His fist hit the back of my neck. I stumbled forward, mouth opening  from the pain. Nate balled his fingers into a fist and hit me in the face. His knuckles collided with my nose. Sharp pain radiated inward and hot blood dripped down my face.

Zane kicked the back of my knees. I fell forward, only to get kicked in the back of the head by Nate. It was too late. I was in too deep, out numbered by two psychopaths. All I could do was pray I’d pass out from pain soon.

Zane reached down, tangling his fists in my hair. He yanked my head back, dragging my body across the floor. Then he hit me in the face—again. I could feel the blood pooling under my skin and knew I would be bruised beyond recognition in the morning.

Nate used the heel of his shoe to stomp on my hand. The little bones in my fingers crunched. The hurt from that webbed up my body, mixing with the other pains. I coughed as blood ran down my throat. The beating continued and Nate and Zane showed no signs of slowing down.

At least Adeline was safe.

Finally, Nate took a step back. He tipped his head, looking at me as I laid there, bloody and panting, on the  dining room floor. The ground vibrated and I knew Zane had walked away. He said something to the girls in the kitchen, but my head was pounding from being repeatedly hit. Everything was muffled.

I fought against the urge to pass out. I wanted to make it up to my room, though the thought of going up the stairs was daunting. The floor shook again and someone ran up the stairs. Nate stepped over me, going into the kitchen. His voice echoed, each word mumbled but too loud. My head throbbed and I could feel my pulse, which was weak and thready, beating in every open wound.

I didn’t even try to get up. Not yet. I needed more time… more time to bleed to death. Nate walked over me, chuckling as he stepped on my hair. My eyes were already swollen. I flattened my palm on the hardwood floor, sticky blood coating my hands.

Everything hurt. Pain radiated along my entire body. Blood steadily dripped from my broken nose and each breath hurt. I couldn’t get up yet even if I tried.

Someone else walked into the room. Their footsteps were too slow, too tentative to be Nate or Zane. Who was it? I opened my eyes just enough to see Adeline’s angelic face. Was I hallucinating? Or maybe I had died… finally died.

“Why?” she whispered as she knelt down on the floor. “Why did you take the blame?” Her brows furrowed.

I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer. I closed then, grimacing at the pain opening my mouth caused. “You’re the only one,” I said and got blood in my mouth. It dripped down my throat, making me cough.

“The only one?” she asked, her voice soft and low. I could see her fingertips tremble.

I slowly moved my head up then down but got hit with another sickening amount of pain. “The only one who got stronger from being here,” I said and brought my knees up. My stomach twisted from the pain. I thought I might throw up. “And you made it past the fence. I couldn’t even do it,” I said, my voice breathy. “And I tried five times.”

Tried and failed five times. I got a beating just as bad as this one three of those five times. And yet I still tried again. That was before, when I still had some fight left in me. It had all gone… but now it was back. Even as I lay on the floor, barely able to move and in so much pain I wanted to pass out, I could feel the fight swirling around inside of me.

“Why would you…” she started, leaning closer. “Wait,” she said suddenly and shook her head. “No…” she sprung up, taking a sharp inhale. I could feel her eyes on me. “You don’t want to be here?” she asked, her voice high pitched and strained.

“Of course not,” I muttered. Why would she even question that? She couldn’t possibly have thought that I was here by choice or that I liked it here, could she? The floor shook again as she hurried out of the room. Maybe she had thought that. Now she was gone. Should I not have told her I didn’t like it here? Did I upset her somehow?

My mind started to check out and sleeping seemed like a really good idea. I was just about to allow my body to succumb to the quiet darkness when Adeline came back into the door.

“You shouldn’t have lied for me,” she said softly. I opened my eyes for a brief second, just enough to see her dip a towel into a bowl of water. She wrung it out then pressed it to a bleeding cut under my right eye. “I feel horrible. It’s my fault.”

“Don’t.” I said, opening the other eye a bit, just enough to look at her. She carefully blotted at the wound. No one had taken care of me in years. It meant a lot to me, but it wasn’t worth the risk. I gritted my teeth and lifted my hand from the floor, reaching out and gently wrapping my bloody fingers around Adeline’s wrist. “Don’t feel bad, Adeline.” I slowly moved my gaze to the living room, worried Nate might appear at the base of the stairs. “And don’t get yourself in trouble.”

Adeline pulled her hand back but I didn’t let go. “I don’t care,” she told me, eyes locking with mine. She carefully pulled my fingers back. I grunted in pain. That was the hand Nate had stomped on.

“I think your finger is broken,” she said and slid her hand under mine.  Her skin was soft, her touch so gentle. It almost took away some of the pain.

I tested the bone, wiggling that finger. It hurt, but it wasn’t broken. “Maybe,” I said. The pain was intense. Maybe it was a small fracture. “I can still move it.”

Adeline cringed. She blinked a few times then stuck the towel back in the water and continued to wash the blood away. I closed my eyes, unable to process how good it felt to have someone take care of me right then. Adeline leaned closer and I could feel her body heat against me. She gently brushed my hair back and ran her hand around the back of my head. I tensed when her fingers touched a large goose egg on the back of my head, right where Nate had kicked me.

She wiped more blood away, and then moved her hands down to the hem of my shirt. I could feel the fabric sticking to my skin, soaked with blood. She tenderly lifted the fabric and gasped. I knew the scab on my side had come off during the beating. The wound was no doubt bleeding. That, and I was covered in scars. Since I rarely looked at my own reflection, it caught me a little off guard every now and then too.

She rocked back, sitting on the floor. I reached out, feeling for her arm. I wanted her to know it was okay… it would be okay. I would be okay eventually. I had always healed before. I heard Adeline take in a deep breath. She stuck the towel back in the bowl of water and blotted more blood from my body.

“You need stitches,” she whispered and leaned in close. She lifted the hem of my shirt a little higher. “And probably an X-ray. Your ribs could be broken.”

They probably were, which was why every time I inhaled, my side hurt. But Nate wouldn’t let me get an X-ray, not yet. He would let me see a doctor, eventually, but only because he needed me to heal so I could work again. Things had to get bad around here before he would take me. And besides… I’d  had my ribs broken by Nate and Zane many times before. There was nothing I could do other than rest and let them heal. Only Nate never let me rest long enough.

“I’ll be okay,” I told her. I took in a ragged breath and put my hands on the floor. Bracing for the pain, I pushed myself up so that I was sitting. I was dizzy, the world spinning in blood spattered circles. I stuck my hand out, shaking, and took the towel from Adeline. I pressed it to my still-bleeding nose and leaned back.

“You should tilt your head forward,” she said softly. “That way you won’t swallow the blood.”

It made sense. I closed my eyes, gritting my teeth as I pitched forward without falling over.

“I’ll get you another towel,” she offered and started to rise.

“No,” I said, my voice muffled by the towel. She heard me and stopped before she left the room. “It’s okay.” I didn’t want her to get in trouble. I didn’t want to risk staining yet another towel with blood and Nate getting  mad about it.

Adeline sat on the floor, just feet from me. Her hands and the front of her pants were covered in blood. My blood. She pulled her knees up, hugging them to her chest.

“Jackson?” she asked quietly. I moved my head in her direction. “How come you never fight back?” she asked then looked embarrassed for asking.

I leaned my head back down. “There were two of them and one of me,” I said. “Zane is almost always carrying.” Talking made blood get into my mouth again. I coughed and spit it out on the towel. “And I used to,” I said and flicked my eyes to Adeline. “Fight back, I mean. The last time I did, I hit Zane in the mouth, knocked out one of his teeth in the front. He has a fake tooth now. You can’t tell unless you’re really close though,” I muttered. “And Nate broke my arm. He made me wait nine days to get it casted.”

Adeline’s face went white. She swallowed and stared at me, eyes getting a little misty. I didn’t want to make her feel bad. But I wanted her to know the truth, to know how risky this all way. Her eyes flicked to the bowl of bloody water on the floor. She opened her mouth to say something else to me but stopped when the floor creaked upstairs.

“Go,” I said, fear filling my heart. “Now!” If Zane or Nate caught her taking care of me, they’d beat her just as badly. Adeline scrambled up, almost knocking over the bowl of water. She bent over, frantically grabbing it, and sloshed some of the water on the floor. She stared at it, knowing the water was a dead giveaway that she had been there, taking care of me.

“Go!” I said again and put the towel over the water. “Adeline, get out of here!” she had to leave. Now.

No sooner did she get into the kitchen, Nate came down the stairs. He looked at me, eyes narrowing. I was still quite bloody, but I wondered if it was obvious that someone had tried to clean me up.  His nose wrinkled in disgust at the sight of me, but he stepped over a puddle of splattered blood and went into the kitchen.

“Good enough,” he said after he inspected the counters. He ushered the girls downstairs, slammed the door shut, and locked every lock. His shoulders were stiff as he turned, eyes narrowing as soon as he saw me. The vein in his head was prominent again.

“Jackson,” he said calmly, a twisted smile pulling up his lips. He came back into the  dining room, stepping around another splatter of blood. He stopped just feet in front of me and crouched down to my level. “I don’t like liars.”

I slowly let my breath out through my bloody nose. I swallowed, my saliva thick with blood. How did Nate know I was lying? I squinted my eyes open again, looking at Nate. Had I become so broken that it was obvious I wouldn’t disobey?

“It was either the China girl or the new one, wasn’t it?” Nate asked, though his words didn’t come out in question. He knew it was one or the other. “Rochelle said she didn’t see anything. I think she’s lying too.” He stood, rolling his neck to the side, popping his spine. “We can do this the easy way or the hard way.”

Fuck. No… I had to stay calm. “I’m not lying,” I mumbled, feeling like I might puke up all the blood I had accidentally swallowed.

“The easy way,” Nate went on as if I hadn’t even spoken , “is you telling me which girl did that.” He smiled again. “The hard way is me punishing the girls, while you watch, until they confess.”

My throat tightened. I didn’t want anything to happen to either of the girls. Just the thought of seeing Adeline being hit repeatedly made my blood boil.

“It was me,” I said again. “I knew you’d make me knock down the icicles tomorrow. I thought I could just do it then,” I said, the lie popping into my head at the last second.

Nate raised an eyebrow. I thought he bought my lie. “You were trying to get out of tomorrow’s work?” he questioned, again, already knowing the answer.

“Yes.”

Nate took a deep breath. “You’re still knocking the icicles down tomorrow.” He moved to the edge of the dining room. “Clean this up then go to your room.”

My eyes closed and I nodded.

Nate kicked me. “Now.”

Slowly, I bent my legs up to stand.

“Faster,” Nate said and shoved me back down. My injured fingers screamed in pain. I had to ignore it. My hand slipped on blood and my chin whacked against the floor. “You are so pathetic.”

No, you are. I tried to glare at Nate but wasn’t able to with my swollen eyes. I struggled but was able to pull myself up. The pain twisted inside of me, drowning the feelings of fight that were so strong just moments ago. I didn’t think I’d make it into the kitchen. My vision started to go dark and I hobbled to the sink, putting my hands on the counter for support.

The blood in my stomach churned. I straightened up, turning to get a towel. I took a few steps before I tried my best to rush to the sink to throw up. The retching hurt my already aching body and the stomach acid burned the cuts on my mouth.

I turned on the sink and washed the vomit down the garbage disposal, then rinsed my mouth. In agony, I leaned down and got a roll of paper towels from under the sink and plodded back into the dining room. I stood there, swaying on my feet just looking at the blood. Most of it was on the floor, but some had splattered onto the walls.

I could hardly move. Cleaning it up to Nate’s standards was going to be horrible. I moved slowly; it took forever to clean everything up. I put the dirty paper towel in the kitchen garbage, hoping I could get away with not emptying it until the morning. Though tomorrow would be worse.

Somehow, I made it to my room. I collapsed onto my bed, not caring that blood was staining the bedspread, and closed my eyes. Adeline’s face flashed before me…her green eyes filled with guilt.

I thought of her eyes and remembered her touch, soft and gentle, until I got pulled into darkness. In a combination of pain, blood loss, and exhaustion, I slept for six straight hours. I woke up cold and extremely uncomfortable.

My body hurt. My muscles were stiff and dried blood covered my skin. My eyes were so swollen it took effort to hold them open. I trudged into the bathroom, dreading turning on the shower and feeling the water spray against all the cuts and gashes on my body.

But I didn’t want to get an infection. I didn’t think Nate would take me to the doctor for that. No…he would wait until it was too late. I grunted in pain as I stepped out of my jeans, lifting each leg slowly. I wondered if Nate would let me fester away until I died or if he’d let Zane finally kill me.

I pulled my shirt over my head, thinking about a girl named Felicity. She was here over five years ago now, but I could still remember her face as if I saw her yesterday. She was tall and thin, with short, black hair and brown skin. She was young at the time, only a few days over fifteen. Zane had won her over with his charm and before she realized what was happening, she had fallen into his trap.

I was still in the basement at the time. Felicity was in denial, thinking she would get out of here in a week… a month… a few months. But that never happened. Because she was so tall and so pretty, she was a popular girl for clients to request. She had an exotic look to her, but always looked classy. She made Nate a lot of money being bought by important businessmen for the night.

I was in the basement with her, the day she took the pregnancy test. I remember her clutching her stomach and crying, saying that it didn’t matter whom the father was, and that the baby was hers and she loved it. We all knew that didn’t matter.

Nate didn’t let her eat for a week to try and force her to miscarry. The other girls in the basement at that time snuck her food and water, but it wasn’t enough. Felicity started bleeding and we all knew her baby had died.

And Nate kept making her work. When the bleeding didn’t stop for days, I asked Nate to take her to the ER. He hit me and told me it wasn’t my place or my business to worry about the girls. We did our best to help her, but Felicity died two weeks later.

I shook my head, trying to push the memory back. I stepped into the shower. No matter what, I wasn’t able to forget her face, the way her lifeless eyes stared up at me when I had to drag her into the woods and bury the body. Nate wanted me to chop her up into pieces too, but I couldn’t do it.

I felt like puking again at the thought of it. Water stung and I hurt badly—so bad. I slowly sat down on the shower floor and tipped my head down, letting the warm water break apart the clotted blood that clung to my hair.

I felt a little better once I got out of the shower. I ate my last granola bar from my secret stash of food and laid back down. I slept for another five hours, waking up confused as to why Nate hadn’t come and gotten me yet. I tested my door; I was locked in.

Nate was allowing me time to recover, but it wasn’t done to benefit me. I couldn’t go out in public looking like this; it would raise too many questions for sure. And both he and Zane got mad when I moved slowly while doing a job.

I tested bending my fingers on my left hand. Two were slightly swollen, but they were moveable. I didn’t think the bones were broken. My ribs, on the other hand, had to be cracked. It still hurt to breath, and I was bruised to all hell.

Someday I would do the same to Nate and Zane. And I would enjoy it.

CHAPTER NINE

Nate kept me away from the girls for two weeks. He was still convinced I was covering for Phoebe or Adeline. I had stayed locked in my room for most of that time since going out in public looking the way I did attracted too much unwanted attention.

My body still hurt. My fingers weren’t as swollen, but I couldn’t bend them all the way. My side hurt when I took a deep breath. I was sure I would have healed by now if I had been allowed to rest and not go days without eating.

I knew the isolation was a punishment. Nate knew that if I cared enough to cover for one of the girls, it would hurt me to be away from them, even though my interactions were limited.

When I woke up that morning, my door was open. I knew that meant it was back to work as usual for me. I slowly got out of bed, stiff but not horribly sore. I made my way downstairs. The house was a mess. I didn’t have to ask; I knew Nate would make me clean it before I did anything else.

Finally, in the afternoon, I was able to sit down and eat something—for the first time in over twenty-four hours—and prepare food for the girls. Zane took over bringing them food whenever I wasn’t able to. I knew all he did was open the basement door and throw random shit down the stairs. The girls had to eat off the floor.

I opened the pantry, looking for packaged cookies or anything sweet to add to the tray. The floor creaked behind me. I tipped my head just enough to see Zane standing in the kitchen. I sighed¸ giving up on the cookies. I pulled granola bars off the middle shelf and closed the door.

Zane popped the top to a beer and sat at the table, flicking his eyes up at me. He came in here on purpose, watching me so I couldn’t spend any more time than necessary with the girls. I turned away from the pantry and added the granola bars to the tray of food.

Wind blew against the house, causing the siding to creak. I looked out the window and saw nothing but snow. It was coming down hard; I could barely see the shed out back. Great. Zane was going to get snowed in with me. Why couldn’t he have gone out before the snowstorm?

I acted like I didn’t know he was there and walked past to the basement door. Balancing the tray with one hand, I unlocked the door and went down the stairs.

“Jackson,” Adeline said, propping herself up on the cot with her elbow. “Are you okay?”

I looked down and shrugged. “I think so.”

“Where have you been?” she asked, and sat up. She looked at me, eyes full of emotion. I shook my head and looked away. I had been locked in my room, but it was better than the basement. Quickly, I set the tray of food on the table. I wanted to go to Adeline, to sit with her, and tell her how glad I was that she was okay. I heard Zane moving around in the kitchen.

“I can’t stay down here,” I told her and took a step back.

Sorrow crossed Adeline’s pretty face. She tossed the thin yellow quilt off of her legs and stood up. She was wearing a faded gray t-shirt and pajama pants. Her hair was a mess, tangled around a bun at the back of her head.

“Thank you,” she added before I could leave. “I never said thank you for what you did. I wish I could pay you back somehow.”

Our eyes met and I felt my heart skip a beat. “You don’t owe me anything, Adeline,” I told her, smiling. She had already paid me back.

She brought me back to life.

The bleach burned my eyes. I blinked and turned my head, taking a few seconds to breathe before I started scrubbing again. The skin around my fingernails was raw from all the chemicals.

The kitchen floor didn’t need to be scrubbed by hand. I had already mopped it that morning. I half assed  scrubbed at first, mostly just swirling water around on the floor. Then Nate came downstairs with a gun in his hands and sat in the breakfast nook. He placed the gun on the table and made business calls, glaring at me if I didn’t scrub hard enough.

I pushed my hair behind my ear and looked up. Nate was busy on the phone, annoyed with someone at the restaurant for buying the wrong type of liquor. I blinked again and moved my eyes to the gun. Could I get to it fast enough?

Nate whipped his head around to look at me. Fuck. Distracted, the scrubbing slowed. I turned my head back down and kept scrubbing.

“Stop,” Nate said and set his phone down.

I froze, waiting for him to go on.

“Put that away then shovel the driveway.” He looked at the clock. “Take Adeline with you. I have customers coming to the house. Don’t waste time.”

I nodded and dropped the scrub brush into the bucket of bleach water. I had to keep my head turned down. Adeline could help. She was going to leave the basement…and I could talk to her for more than a minute.

I quickly rinsed my hands and grabbed my coat. I set out a coat, gloves, and boots for Adeline. They were too big, but it was better than nothing. I didn’t want her to be cold. I went to the basement and hurried down the stairs.

“Adeline?” I called when I got to the bottom of the stairs. She didn’t answer. I took a few steps forward, seeing her lying on the cot. “Adeline,” I said again softly. She took a breath, eyes fluttering open. “Sorry for waking you up,” I said.

She blinked a few more times, eyes adjusting to the light. She pushed herself up. “It’s okay, but why are you?”

“Nate sent me down to get you,” I said. Adeline’s  eyes widened and her body tensed. “He wants us to shovel the driveway,” I added quickly.

“Really?” she asked incredulously. She leaned forward, her mind whirling with the thoughts of going outside.

I nodded. “Several clients come on Tuesdays.”

“Oh.” She got out of bed, biting her bottom lip. I couldn’t help but find her adorable.

“I have boots you can wear,” I said. “They’ll be big, but at least your feet will stay warm and dry.”

“Thanks,” she told me with a faint smile, her green eyes meeting mine. She held my gaze for a few seconds before getting dressed, and then she followed me up the stairs and into the mudroom.

Nate had already set the snow shovels out. I picked one up and handed it to Adeline. We got straight to work, scraping snow off the sidewalk in front of the house.

“I can’t believe you’ve never seen all the Harry Potter movies,” she said, turning to look at me over her shoulder.

“I want to see them,” I said, smiling at the thought of going to a movie. “I can’t see movies though. Nate makes sure I don’t watch TV or listen to the radio.”

Adeline’s cheeks flushed, and it wasn’t from the cold. She blinked several times then said, “I went to the theme park two years ago. It was awesome. I got a wand.” Her eyes sparkled at the memory.

“I heard about the park. It sounds amazing.” I stopped shoveling show and looked at Adeline. I wanted to go to that park someday. Maybe I would.

“It is,” she said, her eyes glossy at the memory. “Everything looks like it’s right from the movie.” Her lips curved into a smile. “My sister and I pretended we were really there. We even talked with British accents. We...” Her voice grew thin and she looked up, blinking back tears. She shook her head and let out a breath.

I wanted to drop my shovel and go to her, wrap my arms around her, and tell her how sorry I was. She turned away and pushed a pile of snow to the side.

“Did you really want Zane to kill me?” she blurted, looking back up.

I faced her, raising an eyebrow. “Huh?”

“When he took me. You said there were other ways to handle it and Zane made it sound like you were suggesting he kill me.”

I shook my head, thinking back to that day. Of course I didn’t want Zane to kill her. “No,” I started. “I was hoping he’d beat the shit out of you and leave after the usual threats. Not that I wanted you to get the shit beaten out of you, but anything is better than this, isn’t it?”

“That is very true.” She tipped her head to the side and let out a deep breath.

I stared at her, reading her face. Being outside had awakened something inside of her. Some of the hopelessness was gone in her eyes, replaced with a furious determination that scared me. If she tried to run again, Nate would kill her.

“What were you doing at the parade?” I asked slowly, the thought just occurring to me “Are you…?” I trailed off, suddenly worried about offending her.

“Gay?” she finished.  “No, I’m not. My friend, Matt, is, and he was in the parade. I went to watch and support him.”

I nodded. “Were you there with anyone?”

“My best friend and my sister.”

Her words were like a punch to the gut. How had they felt, desperately searching for Adeline? “I’m really sorry, Adeline,” I said, and pushed the snow shovel forward. It scraped against the cold cobblestone path.

“It’s not your fault,” she said.

No, it really wasn’t. But I could have tried harder. I could have held Zane back and told her to run. Guilt consumed me and I hated myself for doing nothing. A car drove down the road, the whirling tires echoing off the snow blanketed land.

“We could run away right now,” she said, her words breaking through my guilt.

“We wouldn’t get far in the snow,” I said without thinking. We wouldn’t get very far any time of the year. Nate and Zane would find us. That fear had kept me from running.

“Yes, we could,” she said, her voice picking up just a bit. “We’d just have to make it down the road. Someone would find us sooner or later.”

“You’re not going to, are you?” I asked, ready to tackle her to the ground again if need be.

She pulled her lips over her teeth and shook her head. “Not now. It’s too cold. I could freeze to death before I found help.”

“Aren’t you afraid of getting hurt?” I asked her, my eyes going from her pretty face to the road and back again.

“Not really. I’m more afraid of my family getting hurt.” She stared at the road, eyebrows pushing together as she thought. “I still think there's a way. Don’t let fear keep you from dreaming, right?”

I half smiled. “Don’t actually do it, okay? Not now at least. I don’t want you to get hurt. Obviously,” I said so quietly I wasn’t sure if she heard me.

“Why?” she asked, turning to me. There was something in her eyes, something that said she didn’t understand why I’d risk myself for her.

Something fluttered inside of me. I looked into Adeline’s eyes once more before turning my head down. “There’s something so… so alive in you,” I started. “You’ve been here for half a year, Addie, and you’re even more determined to leave now than you were when we brought you here. You’re not broken. You still hold onto who you are. I’ve never seen that before. Everyone ends up giving up. It’s like they can’t see any way out.”

Snow fell, small flakes catching in Adeline’s eyelashes. She blinked them away.

“Do you see any way out?” she asked.

I put my hands on the shovel, leaning on it. “I didn’t, until recently,” I admitted.

“What changed?”

You.

“Don’t know. Sick of it?” I added, covering up the fact that she changed me. Her determination…her will to live and get out of this hell-forsaken place… it reminded me that I used to want that those—that I still want those things.

She put her arms close to her body and eyed the farmhouse. “Do you think about what life would be like if you weren’t here?”

“Sometimes,” I said. More now than ever before. “I want to go to school. I want to study things, anything. I don’t care what it is. But I should have started college three years ago, and Nate never let me finish high school.” It embarrassed me to say that I didn’t even have a high school diploma. I used to like school. I was good at studying. I liked learning. “It’s just something to think about, I guess.”

“No,” she said passionately and took a step closer. “It’s more than just something to think about. It’s what keeps you together isn’t it? Keeps you from surrendering your hope. You have to hold onto it. Want it. Need it. Or… or else you’d have nothing.”

I looked into her eyes. Her words…the way she spoke. My heart skipped a beat. I wanted to pull her to me, to feel the heat of her skin, and run my hands through her hair. I had never felt like that before, to want to be that close to someone.

“The driveway’s not gonna shovel itself!” Zane yelled, his voice coming from inside the house. I startled, the first thought in my mind was that he was going to come out here and hurt Adeline. I jerked forward, wanting to shield her. I moved too fast and slipped on ice. I caught my balance and pushed more snow off the path.

Adeline moved several yards away, working on clearing the end of the path. I pushed more snow away, throwing it to the side. The cold air hurt to breath in and my swollen fingers hurt like hell. I stole a glance at Adeline. I wanted to know more about her. She was a curious thing, and a fighter, that was for sure.

She paused, looking down the long driveway. “Are we really going to do the whole thing?” she asked, her breath clouding around her face.

“Yeah,” I said an flicked my eyes to the garage “There’s a snow blower in the garage.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” she spat, eyes wide.

I shrugged. “I wish I was.” I moved another line of snow off the path. “Zane is impatient. If I do something really slow, sometimes he lets me use a tool or something to speed it up.”

“Oh,” she said, nodding and not taking her eyes off of me.

“And sometimes that just pisses him off and he punches me. I never really know.” I turned my head to her and let out a breath. “But today I’m guessing Nate will want the driveway cleared. So go slow. Don’t strain yourself.”

“Okay,” she said and slowly moved forward. We took our time, lazily pushing snow to the edge of the driveway while talking about random things, mostly books that Adeline was looking forward to reading the summer she was taken.

About an hour later, Nate stepped onto the porch. He held up his hand. The keys to the snow blower dangled from his finger. I internally sighed; the cold was creeping into me and I wanted to get this done and go inside.

Nate’s blue eyes met mine and he threw the keys into the yard. Fuck. I didn’t take my eyes off the spot they landed. I heard the front door slam shut as Nate went back inside.

“I know where they landed,” I said to Adeline. “Well, generally.”

“Tell me where to go,” she said, carefully picking her way through the snow to get the lost keys. It took almost an hour to find them.

“Finally,” Adeline said when she picked up the keys, shaking the snow. She held them up for me. I led the way into the garage.

“Stay in here,” I said once we set foot inside. “It’s not warm but at least you’re out of the wind.” The temperature was dropping fast as the sun began to sink. In here she could at least sit down and rest.

Adeline immediately shook her head while looking down the L-shaped driveway. “It will still take you forever. I’ll do the short part of the driveway by hand,” she said.

“I can do it,” I pressed. I didn’t want to make her do it. And besides…it wasn’t anything I wasn’t used to.

“Really,” she continued. “Let me help.”

“Okay,” I said only because my fingers still hurt and it was getting harder and harder to breathe. I started the snow blower and headed out, Adeline stayed near the garage, pushing more snow away. As soon as we were done and I'd put the snow blower away, a car pulled into the driveway.

I left the garage, stomping the snow off my boots and waved whoever was in the car to the front door. Adeline followed close behind me. I turned to go back in the garage. Adeline froze, fear taking over her face.

“What’s wrong?” I asked her.

She moved her head back and forth. She brought her arms up, hugging herself. She turned to me, scared. “I know that car.”

I flicked my eyes back to the car. I knew that car too. It belonged to a regular client. “Yeah, that’s Travis—” I cut off abruptly. “Oh.” Travis was the one who stopped Adeline from running to freedom. He was the one who brought her back here after she had gotten to the road. It was sheer luck—horrible, bad luck—that the one person she flagged down for help knew who she had become.

I stepped in front of Adeline, blocking her from Travis’ sight. She shuffled her feet, moving closer to me. Her arms brushed against my back and I could feel her breath on my neck. Travis parked his car and got out, giving me a curt nod as he continued to the front door.

“I bet you’d like to hit him with a car,” I said quietly, turning to face Adeline.

“You have no idea,” she said, looking up into my eyes. She was tall, only a couple inches shorter than me. Some of the fear melted away the moment our eyes met. I looked her over, taking in the dark purple circles and the lines of worry and stress around her beautiful eyes.

I wanted to take that way, to make her happy. I couldn’t give myself that, let alone here. But I could keep her away from the basement for a while longer. “We should probably shovel the sidewalk again,” I said with a small grin. “Ya know, since it’s been snowing this whole time.”

“Yes,” she said seriously. Her shoulders relaxed a bit more. “I think that’s a good idea. We should be thorough.”

My grin turned into a smile as I watched some of the anxiety ease away. We took a step forward when the garage door opened.

“What the fuck is taking so long?” Zane barked.

“Snow’s still falling,” I stated. What I wouldn’t give to hit him repeatedly with the snow shovel. “We need to re-shovel.”

“You do it,” Zane said. “Adeline has to work. Travis is waiting.”

CHAPTER TEN

“What?” Adeline blurted.

“You’re working. Get in the house,” Zane snapped. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and protect her from harm. Or hold back Zane and tell her to run. My eyes flicked to him, standing in the doorway like a vulture. His gun hung from his belt. He’d shoot me and then Adeline before she even made it to the road.

“N-no,” Adeline stuttered. My heart raced. Fuck. Zane didn’t like being told “no”. And Adeline knew that.

“No?” Zane asked and raised an eyebrow. He laughed at her. “Get in the goddam house.”

“Why?” I blurted and Zane looked at me, surprised.

“What’s it to you?” he retorted.

“He’s Rochelle’s client,” I said in a level voice and moved closer to Adeline. “Rochelle is busy,” Zane snapped. “Adeline, get your ass in here before I come get you.”

My chest hurt from my pounding heart. Adeline wobbled as she moved forward, her body on autopilot. She knew to do what she was told and avoid the pain. I swallowed hard, questioning the mantra I had repeated over and over in my head for years.

I followed behind her, taking off my boots and gloves. Zane shoved her forward.

“Hurry up, you slow ass,” he said through gritted teeth. She let the coat fall and walked through the kitchen. Sweat dripped down my back as I thought of ways to help her. I couldn’t think of any that didn’t result in a world of pain for both of us.

Zane whirled around, eyes glimmering. “You like her don’t you?” he sneered, catching the way I was looking at her. “You want to stick you dick in her tight little pussy and see how she feels?”

I hated the way he talked about her. I cast my eyes down, trying to control my temper.

Zane snickered. “She’s probably not that tight anymore.” His snicker turned into a laugh. “I can find out. I’ll bend her over and fuck her so hard she won’t be able to walk straight for days. And you can watch.”

My fingers curled into a fist, I ground my teeth together. Zane laughed and crossed his arms. “Awe,” he said, pulling his lips into a frown. “Am I making you mad? Poor little Jackson,” he laughed. “You can look, but you can’t touch. Actually,” he said and spun around so fast I didn’t realize what he was doing. He fist whacked me in the face. Of guard, I staggered back and fell. “You can’t look. Or talk to her. You do what you’re told.”

He reached down and grabbed a handful of my hair, dragging me across the kitchen. I kicked out, trying to stop him, but the pain in my ribs was too much. He let go and my head whacked on the floor.

The next thing I knew there was a gun in my face. Zane’s finger hovered over the trigger. His aim was unfaltering, and he lined the scope up with my eye.

“Get up,” he ordered. I didn’t take my eyes off the gun. I slowly stood, heart racing. “Go upstairs.”

Zane pressed the gun in between my shoulder blades. I stiffly walked up the stairs, pain webbing along my ribs each time I moved.

“Stop here,” Zane said quietly. He stepped back, his grip on the gun lax. “And enjoy the show.”

I looked at the closed guest room door. It was reinforced, blocking out more sound than a normal door. But it wasn’t enough. I could still hear Adeline’s grunts of pain, and Travis moaning in pleasure as he ordered her around.

“Wish that was you?” Zane sneered. He took a step forward, making me back up closer to the door. He lowered the gun’s aim from my face to between my legs. “You miss it, don’t you? It can be arranged, you know. Well, that’s if you can still get it up.” He licked his lips. “How about I tie your precious Adeline down and make you fuck her while I watch?”

My heart was in my throat. I imagined myself grabbing the gun, shooting Zane in the face over and over until all that was left was broken bone, blood, and brain matter splattered on the wall. Then I’d get Adeline and we’d run and never look back.

The front door opened and closed. Zane’s eyes flicked to the base of the stairs. Nate was home. Zane used the gun as a pointer.

“Go to your room,” he ordered. I gladly moved away from the door, limping into my room. Zane slammed the door and locked me in. I sat on the bed, so pissed my hands were shaking. I didn’t realize that I had hurt my swollen finger by curling it into a fist. Slowly, I straightened it, shaking my hand to get rid of some of the pain.

I fucking hated Zane. I hated him with ever fiber of my being. I wanted to hurt him, hurt him worse than he’d ever hurt me.

But how? How could I go after someone who was armed? How could I risk getting too injured and not being able to take care of the girls again?

There was no way around it. I couldn’t.

Later that day, I dropped Lily and Phoebe off at client’s houses. Nate had changed the codes again; once I returned to the farmhouse I was locked in again. Zane was away at the club with Rochelle and Nate was busy on the phone in his room. I snuck down to see Adeline as soon as I could.

“Adeline?” I said when I got to the bottom of the stairs.

She sat up quickly, eyes wide. Her hand flew to her chest.

“Sorry,” I told her. I didn’t mean to startle her.

“It’s okay,” she said, letting out a breath. She looked into my eyes, and something clicked into place inside me. I didn’t know what it was, or how just looking at Adeline could do that, but I wanted more. I moved closer. “I didn’t hear you coming,” she said. “I always  hear you coming.”

I frowned. “I’m not supposed to be down here.” Zane of course, had told Nate about my interest in Adeline. “I… I wanted to see you.”

She ran her hands through her hair, still damp from showering. “Oh,” she said simply and smiled. She got off the cot, keeping the blanket around her shoulders, and walked over to me, stopping just inches in front of me. Concern muddled her face as she eyed the new bruise on my cheek. Gently, she touched it.

“What happened?” she asked.

I put my hand over hers and my stomach fluttered at the feeling of her skin. “Zane hit me again,” I said.

She turned her hand around, pushing her fingers through mine so our hands were linked. “Why?”

“He saw me talking to you.”

“You can’t talk to me?” she asked, eyebrows moving together.

I frowned and shook my head. “He said I wasted time by talking. Plus, I’m not supposed to do anything I enjoy while I’m working. Or ever,” I added ruefully. “Not when he’s around at least.”

“You enjoy talking to me?” Adeline asked with a smile.

I knew my cheeks reddened. “Yeah,” I said honestly. “I do.” The floor creaked above us. I looked at the stairs, ready to race up them if need be. Then I heard the water turn on. Nate was getting in the shower. Good…I had some time. “It’s freezing down here,” I said. The chill was getting to me already.

“It’s awful,” Adeline said, pulling the blanket tighter around her. “I knew old houses were drafty, but this is just awful.”

“I’ll be back,” I said when the floorboards creaked again. I hurried up the stairs, through the kitchen, and into the  dining room. I looked through the living room at the stairs, making sure Nate wasn’t coming down. The bathroom door closed. Yes, he was most definitely in the shower. I rushed back into the kitchen and grabbed a coffee mug, filling it with water and sticking it in the microwave.

I moved fast, making the hot chocolate for Adeline in record time. I carefully carried the hot drink back down the stairs. Adeline smiled when she saw me, then her eyes moved to the mug of hot chocolate.

“Oh my God,” she said when I gave her the cup. “Oh my God.” She held the mug to her face and inhaled. “Jackson…” she started and trailed off, shaking her head. “Thank you,” she said, eyes locking with mine again. “You shouldn’t have, though. I don’t want to see you get hurt. Again.”

I shrugged. It was worth it just to see her smile. “No one will know as long as I take the mug upstairs before anyone sees it. Do you even like hot chocolate?” I asked shyly.

She nodded, blowing on the hot drink before taking a sip. “Love it.”

“Good,” I said and smiled. “It’s nothing special, just a mix.”

“There’s a way to make hot chocolate not from a mix?” she asked and took another drink. “I didn’t know that,” she admitted. “Though I suppose years ago the little one-cup sized mixes didn’t exist.”

“Yeah, I suppose.” I watched her take another drink. I wanted to stay and talk with her… but I didn’t know what to say.

“It stopped snowing,” I finally said. “And it’s supposed to be warmer tomorrow. The snow will probably melt by the weekend.”

“Typical Iowa winter,” she mumbled. “I hope it snows again soon so we can shovel. Not that it was the most fun thing to do, but being outside is better than this. I hate being locked down here.”

“I hated it too,” I said.

“You were locked down here?” Adeline asked, surprised. She turned to me, reading the  disdain the memory brought. “For how long?” she asked gently.

I shuffled my feet. It was years, I knew that for sure. But the specifics… “I don’t really know.”

Adeline closed her eyes, feeling the warm steam from the cup on her face. Then she looked at the spot next to her on the cot. “Want to sit?”

“Yes,” I said quietly. I did want to sit by her. I wanted to hold her, to feel her against me. But I knew that kind of physical contact could freak her out. It used to freak me out. I kept my arms close to my body and sat. “Is this okay?” I asked, worried I was too close.

“Yes,” she said. Her shoulders relaxed. “So,” she started. “Are you from Iowa?”

I shook my head. “No. Illinois. You are, right?”

“Yeah. I was born in Pella and lived there for ten years. My parents always wanted to open an art gallery, so we moved closer to Des Moines for business when they finally had the money.”

“And you were going to school?” I asked.

She nodded. “University of Iowa.”

“Did you like it?”

The question caused her heart to break; I could see it on her face. She blinked back her emotions.  “Yeah, I loved college,” she said.

The front door slammed shut, shaking the house. Fuck. I jumped up, body tense. “Zane’s back.” I looked at Adeline. “I was supposed to get your laundry.” I took her empty hot chocolate mug and grabbed the overflowing laundry basket. “Night, Adeline,” I said at the foot of the stairs.

“Addie,” she said. “Call me Addie.”

I smiled.  “Okay. Night, Addie.”

“Night, Jackson.”

I couldn’t get Adeline off of my mind. As I laid down that night—finally, at three AM…Nate decided the driveway needed to shovel again around midnight. I wasn’t allowed to use the snow blower this time, either—I couldn’t stop thinking about her.

I was in that state between waking and sleeping and I was flitting back and forth between dreams and nightmares. I would remember her touch, her fingertips gently gracing my bruised skin. My heart would flutter and I’d feel almost content. Then I’d hear Travis growling for her to look at him while he raped her.

My eyes opened, heart racing. I felt like puking. I sat up, rubbing my hands over my face. I wanted to strangle Nate in his sleep. Even if my door wasn’t locked, his was. From the inside. And Zane’s was too.

“I hate this,” I muttered to myself. I hated feeling helpless. And it wasn’t just feeling helpless…I was helpless. I got up, too on edge to lie down. There had to be a way out of this. My chest tightened at the thought of disobeying. I was finally feeling better after the last beat down…and that wasn’t the worst I’d had.

I’ve woken up in traction twice. Nate played the role of worried uncle, telling the doctors and nurses that I was a daredevil child with a love of dirt bikes. The lies were bought…literally sometimes. I knew Nate had paid off people before to keep them from asking questions. Though I’d also heard him tell Zane not to beat me that badly again to avoid suspicion. Not because it was wrong or a horrible thing to do…but because he had a reputation to uphold.

I finally drifted to sleep as the sun was rising, only to be awoken a few hours later to start the day’s work. I got to see Adeline again when I brought the girls their food that day…and the next…and the next.

Three days after I brought her hot chocolate, Nate sent me to get her. He wanted us to do yard work, even though the ground was still frozen.

“Addie?” I called from the top of the stairs. I didn’t want to startle her this time. I heard her get up and move to the base of the stairs. She looked right at me again. Captivated, I couldn’t look away for a few seconds. “We have yard work to do,” I said finally.

“Yard work?” she echoed, arching her eyebrows. “It’s still winter.”

I frowned and shrugged. “I know. I think that’s the point; we’ll have to do it over again.”

“What are we doing?”

“I don’t know. Nate just told me to get you.”

She hurried away and picked up a coat. “At least it gets me out of here,” she mumbled and followed me up stairs, through the kitchen, and into the mudroom. I put on my coat and punched in the code to get outside. Nate was out there waiting for us. He looked flawless, like usual, wearing another one of his custom-made suits. They were ridiculously expensive; I knew since I had picked them up for him before.

“These bushes,” he said and waved at the front of the house. “They have to go.”

I stepped forward, looking at the row of boxwood bushes. “I just put those in this spring,” I said without thinking.

“I don’t care,” Nate said calmly. “Get rid of them. I want something with flowers instead.”

“It’s too early to plant anything,” Adeline said.

Nate turned to her “Do you think I’m stupid?” he asked. I felt my heart in my throat. Adeline shook her head. “Good. I know it’s too early. That doesn’t matter.” His eyes darted back to the bushes. “Get rid of the bushes. Level the ground. Take everything out back and burn it.” His cold, blue-gray eyes drilled into Adeline. “Prove to me you’re worth keeping.” Fuck. That’s why he had been putting her to work. I’d heard him muttering about how Addie was ‘more trouble than she’s worth’ before. What was he planning on doing with her if she was more trouble?

Nate turned to me. “I want it done by sunset.”

There was no way we would get this done in a few hours. It took me longer than that to put the bushes in, and the ground wasn’t frozen then. We didn’t have a choice. Adeline’s fate depended on this.

“Yes, sir,” I said and watched Nate walk away I waved for Adeline to follow me to the shed to get tools. Adeline grabbed a shovel, slowly running her hands up and down the handle. A tight smile pulled up her lips.

“You have a weird look in your eye,” I told her. “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking about how nice it would be to beat Nate to death with a shovel. We could take him out and bury him in the backyard.” She looked at me. “No, we should leave him in the house so when Zane comes back and sees the bloody and mangled body, he’ll be shocked, and we can get him too.”

It surprised me to hear her say the same thing I was thinking. “Sounds good to me,” I said and stepped out of the shed.

“Seriously,” she stated as she followed behind me. The boots were too big for her and clomped with each step. “Let’s do it.”

“Addie, we can’t,” I said.

“Why not?” she asked.

“A bullet is faster than swinging a shovel.”

“Oh,” she sighed. “Damn.” We walked around to the front of the house.

“If I ever figure out the combination to get into his room at night, I’ll slit his throat in his sleep,” I promised. I had envisioned it over and over last night.

“He has a combination lock on his bedroom door?” she asked.

I moved my head up and down “Zane too. Just like the ones on the exterior doors but with different codes.”

“Do you know the combinations?”

I stabbed at the ground with the shovel. There was about an inch of mud from the melted snow that splatted away. Under that was frozen solid dirt. “Just the ones for the exterior doors. One-three-four-two.” I flicked my eyes to her. “For now.”

“What do you mean ‘for now?'” she asked and plunged her shovel into the dirt near a bush.

“Nate randomly changes them. He’s really paranoid.” I stabbed at the frozen ground again. “I don’t always know them, either, and if you get the combination wrong, an alarm goes off.”

“Oh,” she said, trying to chip away at the solid ground. We worked silently together, slowly making dents in the ground. I could tell Adeline was getting tired and sore. She was working as hard as she could but hadn’t made much progress with digging up the bush in front of her. She needed to take a break, but I knew she wouldn’t ask for one.

“What’s your favorite book?” I asked her, pausing for a few seconds.

“Oh gosh,” she started, her tone nostalgic. “I have like fifty books in my ‘Top Ten Favorites’ list. That’s a really hard question. I love so many. I will admit I’m biased toward paranormal or fantasy. There’s just something about the worlds those books take place in. I used to say I’d give anything to live in a magical land but now…” she sighed. “People usually thought I was weird when I said that.”

“I don’t think it’s weird,” I agreed. “I’d give anything to be anywhere else.”

She smiled faintly and nodded before turning her attention to the mailbox.

“Hey!” she said, dropping her shovel. “There’s a dog!”

Before I had time to process her words, she hurried toward it.

“Addie, no, Nate could see you!” I called, but she didn’t stop. “Addie!” I repeated and dropped my shovel. I jogged over to her. “Adeline!”

The dog looked up, freezing as soon as it saw us. Adeline knelt down and stuck out her hand. “Hey puppy,” she whispered. I watched the dog size her up. It cowered, and I was worried it would freak out and bite her. “It’s okay, sweetie. I won’t hurt you,” she cooed.

“That’s a Pitbull. Be careful it could bite you!” I said, looking askance at its teeth.

“Don’t breed stereotype,” she said over her shoulder. She made a kissing noise. The dog took a tentative step toward her. “Hello beautiful,” she said to the dog. It was skinny, with a striped brown and black pattern to its coat.

“You’re a girl,” Adeline said, extending her hand a bit further. “Are you lost?” Her tail began to wag.

“She seems friendly,” I said, slowly kneeling down next to Adeline. The dog shied away. Slowly, I held out my hand, just like Addie had done. The dog eyed me for a second, and then sniffed my fingers. Deciding I wasn’t a threat, she turned her attention back to Adeline, tail wagging.

Adeline’s eyes sparkled as she smiled at the dog. It crept closer, tail wagging faster and faster. Then it licked Addie’s face.

“She’s likes you,” I said, feeling myself smile at the sight of Addie’s smile.

“I think she used to be somebody’s. She likes people.” Adeline opened her arms. The dog moved into her embrace, her back end wiggling from the force of her wagging tail. She pressed her head against Addie’s stomach, looking so grateful for the attention. “Are you a lonely girl? Poor little thing, all alone,” she said in a high-pitched voice. “You don’t have to be lonely anymore. I’ll take care of you.”

My heart plummeted to the cold ground. Addie was just talking to the dog, not meaning any of this. But knowing that there was no way she could take care of her hit me like a sucker punch. In a second, it reminded me of everything we didn’t have.

Freedom. Happiness. A life worth living.

Addie continued to pet the dog, telling her she’d share her lunch with her. I frowned and told Adeline we wouldn’t eat until after the work was done. We went back to work, and the dog followed. Though the happiness was temporary, I liked seeing Addie smile like this.

“You need a name, baby,” she told the dog, running her nails over the dog’s back. “How about Rosie? You look like a Rosie to me?” The dog licked Adeline’s face again, like she approved of the name.

“Rosie wandered up to the right person,” I said. Adeline looked up at me, smiling. I instantly smiled back. She turned back to the dog, baby-talking and petting her. I picked up my shovel and started digging up the bush again.

“I’ll help you in a minute,” she said.

“Don’t worry about it,” I told her. “Play with Rosie while you can.” I smiled again and started hacking at the hard ground again. Adeline sat on the ground, throwing a stick for Rosie to fetch. After a few minutes, Adeline got up to help me dig up the bush I was working on.

Rosie stayed by our sides, playing in the mud while we worked. Adeline was covered in muddy paw prints and she had dirt streaked across her face. For the first time ever, she looked happy.

We got another bush out of the frozen ground when the front door opened. Nate stepped out, ready to give us another order… which probably was to hurry the fuck up.

Then he saw Rosie.

“Where the hell did that thing come from?” he asked, his nostrils flaring with disgust.

“She just wandered here,” I said, a bit out of breath from digging.

“Make it go away.” Nate waved his hand in the air.

Shit. I cringed, knowing that it wasn’t going to end well if we couldn’t get Rosie to leave the yard. Nate hated animals. I stepped forward, throwing my arms at her. All Rosie did was look at me and wag her tail. Then she dropped down on her front legs, wagging her tail. She yipped at me, enticing me to play. Her eyes glimmered, thinking this was a game.

“Rosie, be quiet!” I whispered. She barked again and ran through the dead flower garden.

“I don’t want that thing hanging around,” Nate stated, pulling out his gun as he stepped off the porch.

“No!” Adeline shouted. “Don’t shoot her!”

Nate laughed. “I wasn’t going to,” he said and held the gun in the air, showing us that he was just going to shoot straight up to scare the dog away. “But now I have a better idea. Jackson,” he said removed the clip from the gun. He took the bullets out until there was one left. “Shoot the dog.”

“What?” Adeline blurted, the color draining from her face. “No. She's innocent. Sh-she didn’t do anything!”

“She’ll leave on her own. Stray dogs don’t stay in one place,” I tried, heart racing. “She won’t stay.”

“That’s beside the point,” Nate said smugly and walked across the cobblestone path. Rosie ran over, excited to greet a new person. He kicked her.

“Stop!” Adeline cried as Rosie yelped. Rosie looked at Nate, trying to figure out what she had done to upset him. “Stop it! She’s just an animal!” Adeline begged. She dropped her shovel, tears in her eyes, and ran over to the dog, wrapping her arms around her.

Nate was there, behind her in just seconds. He twisted Adeline’s hair in his hand, jerking her head back. I didn’t think twice. Anger boiled inside of me. I raised the shovel, ready to smash it over Nate’s head. Without blinking, Nate raised the gun, pointing it at me.

“Drop the shovel, Jackson,” Nate said, sounding bored.

My breath came out in a ragged huff. I looked at Adeline, her head pulled up from Nate’s grip on her hair. I licked my lips and looked at the gun. I didn’t have a choice. Feeling defeated, I dropped the shovel.

“Move over there,” Nate said, using the gun to point to the path. I went to where he was pointing. “Get up, Adeline,” he ordered.

Adeline scrambled up. Then Nate pressed the gun to the back of her neck. Adeline’s face went white. She stared at me, tears welling in her eyes. Her lip quivered and she didn’t move. I could hear my heart pounding in my ears. Everything stood still.

Nate reached into his jacket and pulled out a shiny switchblade. He flicked out the blade, smiling at the sight of the shiny metal. He took a step closer to Adeline, pressing her back to him. He removed the gun from her neck, switching it for the knife.

“Jackson, shoot the dog.” He extended his other hand, holding the gun by the barrel. “You so much as point the gun at me, I’ll slit her throat.”

Tears ran down Adeline’s face. She held her arms out, terrified of moving. I stared at the shiny blade. Nate pressed it against her skin just enough to hurt, but not enough to cut her skin. I didn’t move, didn’t even breathe. I looked into Adeline’s eyes.

“Jackson!” Nate bellowed and Adeline startled. My heart stopped beating and I stared at her neck, terrified she had caused the blade to sink into her skin. What choice did I have? Rosie… poor Rosie! She was just an animal, she was innocent…she hadn’t done anything wrong. I didn’t want to kill her. I didn’t want to pull the trigger and watch her die. I moved forward and took the gun from Nate’s hands.

Could I turn it on him and pull the trigger before he slit Adeline’s throat? Would the knife cut into her neck as his body fell to the ground? I couldn’t be sure. And I couldn’t risk Addie.

“Her blood will be on your hands,” Nate reminded me. “Shoot the dog and throw the body in the woods.”

My mouth fell open in horror and my head moved up and down. I blinked, my eyes dry from the cold air. I looked down at sweet Rosie.

“Come here, girl,” I said softly. I closed my eyes, hating myself almost as much as I hated Nate. I had no choice. I couldn’t think about this. I couldn’t feel. I just had to do what I was told to avoid the pain, not just for my sake, but also for Adeline’s.

I nodded,  my mouth opening in horror.  I blinked and turned to Rosie.

“Come here, girl,” I said softly.

I looked up at Adeline, pleading for her to forgive me. Tears rolled down her face. She looked at me, into my soul and past my broken heart. Her jaw trembled but I knew she didn’t blame me.

I turned, taking a few steps away from Adeline. She had closed her eyes. I cocked the gun and looked down at the little dog, sitting by my feet wagging her tail. She thought we were playing a game. I didn’t want to do this… I didn’t want to take away the one thing that had made Adeline smile.

But I didn’t want her to die even more. I didn’t want to see Nate slowly drag the blade across her neck, her warm blood spraying in the air. She’d fall in a red puddle and would be dead in seconds. The light she fought so hard to hold onto would be out. No. Her story didn’t end that way.

Tears pricked the corners of my eyes. I lined the gun up with Rosie’s head, hoping and praying that one shot was enough to end it all for her. Then I closed my eyes and pulled the trigger.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

The shot rang out, echoing across the barren land. The bullet hit Rosie in the head. She collapsed instantly and didn’t even cry out. My ears rang and I felt like I might vomit. I was dizzy and little white dots floated in my vision.

I lowered the gun, wishing with all my heart that there were one more bullet left in the chamber. I’d press the gun into Nate’s mouth and pull the trigger. His blood would spray up on my face and I’d laugh.

I blinked, the image of the dead dog burned into my retinas. I turned, mouth hanging open in shock. Complete self-loathing came over me. Then I saw Nate. Who was he to force this upon me?

Nate flipped the knife so the flat side was to Adeline’s skin. He slowly dragged the blade across her neck. He pushed her down, laughing. The sick feeling turned into rage.

“Get back to work,” Nate snarled and moved forward to get the gun from me. His fingers touched my skin. I yanked my hand back out of his touch. Rage took over and I wanted to risk throwing a punch at Nate.

I saw Adeline crumpled on the ground and changed my mind at the last minute. I didn’t need to be fighting with Nate now. I needed to comfort Addie.

The smugness disappeared from Nate’s face and his eyes widened when he saw my anger. I pushed past him, ignoring him calling my name, and rushed to Adeline. I knelt down next to her.

“Addie,” I whispered, voice trembling. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

She turned her head up, cheeks soaked with tears. She opened her mouth to say something but couldn’t as she sobbed. She leaned forward, crying. I put my hand on her arm, gently pushing her up. Then she threw her arms around me.

I tensed. For so long I wanted to hold her, to hug her and comfort her. Now I was nervous, scared the  touch would be too much. Carefully, I bent my arms around her. She buried her head into my shoulder, crying. I hugged her tighter and closed my eyes, resting my head against hers. Being that close to Adeline, comforting her…it comforted me too.

“I told you to get back to work!” Nate yelled and stomped over. He grabbed my hair and yanked back. I was crouched down and not at all balanced. I tumbled backwards. Adeline was still in my arms; she fell with me, landing awkwardly on top of me.

Nate’s lips turned up in a snarl and he shoved Adeline off of me.

“You’re a monster,” Adeline said through gritted teeth and rose to her feet. Nate strode into the house, not caring about the dog or us. He punched in the combination and went inside. I knew he was watching us.

“I’m really sorry, Addie,” I said as I stood, unable to look at Adeline.

“It’s not your fault,” she sniffled. “Don’t apologize.”

I took off my coat and laid it over Rosie, not wanting Adeline to have to see the body. I picked up my shovel and moved to the side of the house

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I’m going to bury her.”

Adeline nodded, blinking away tears, and grabbed her shovel. Neither of us spoke as we dug the grave. Adeline turned away when I picked up Rosie.

“I’ll finish it, Addie,” I told her. I could see her nod and wipe away tears. I gently set the body down and covered her with dirt. “It’s done,” I said.

“Thank you,” she told me, teeth chattering.

“Are you cold?”

She eyes closed in a slow blink. “I think so. You have to be,” she added, eying my coat on the ground.

I shook my head. “Digging warmed me up.”

“Should we finish?” she asked and waved her hand at the bushes.

“Yeah. You don’t have to. I’ll do it.”

She picked up the shovel anyway, channeling her anger as she shoved it into the hard ground. It took awhile, but we were finally able to get one of the bushes out. Not too long after, Nate stepped onto the porch, ordering us inside. I took the shovels and put them away in the shed then went into the garage.

Adeline and I stomped the mud off of our boots and paused by the door. I looked into her eyes, wanting to pull her to me in another embrace. I wanted to dry her tears and promise her things would be okay… someday.

But then a car turned into the driveway. I peered through the garage window. It was Zane. I punched in the code and went into the house, removing my boots and jacket. I went with Adeline to the basement door. She stopped on the first step, turning to look at me. There was yearning in her eyes, like she didn’t want to be away from me.

“I’ll bring food down later,” I promised.

She bit her lip and nodded before going down stairs. I shut and locked the door.  Zane entered the house, with three young girls and Rochelle behind him.

“Wow,” one of the girls said, looking around the house. “This place is nice, man!”

Rochelle beamed. “It is, isn’t it? Zane takes such good care of me!”

It only took me a second to look over the girls to know why they were here. Every few months, Zane went out in search of new girls to lure into his web of lies. Zane glared at me and I knew he wanted me out of sight. I could gladly do that. I wished I could sneak downstairs and wait with Addie, but instead I hurried into my room. I needed a few minutes alone to process what had just happened.

Later, I snuck downstairs to see Adeline. She was alone in the basement again.

“Addie?” I called, walking to her cot. She shot up. “Sorry. Did I wake you?”

“Yeah,” she breathed.

“Oh, sorry,” I mumbled. “I hope you weren’t having a good dream.”

“Of course not,” she said and straightened up, pushing her brown hair out of her face. Her eyes moved past me and to the stairs. “Who are those girls upstairs?”

“Zane’s newest recruits,” I answered with a frown.

“Recruits?” she echoed.

With a sigh, I nodded and sat next to her. “Every once in a while he goes out, usually to the mall, and sweet talks a few girls into working for him.”

She shook her head. “Why would anyone fall for that?”

“Zane has a way with people. He’s good at getting inside your head, making you feel special. He’s so manipulative it’s almost… almost animalistic. In the end, you want to do things for him.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t care how sweet someone is to me. I would never agree to have sex for money that I can’t even keep!”

“It doesn’t work like that, Addie,” I explained. “Zane picks out girls who already have issues, family, self esteem… that kind of thing. He builds them up and makes sure they depend on him. Then he’ll start asking for favors, but they’re small at first. He makes these girls think that he loves them… ” I trailed off, remembering the short time when I wanted Zane to like me. “And a lot of them are young. They believe what he tells them. And they keep the money at first. He buys them stuff.” I looked away. “Plus, if you haven’t noticed, Zane exceeds the definition of ‘attractive.' You girls eat that shit up.”

She smiled and playfully kicked my foot. “Don’t group me with ‘those girls.’”

“Sorry,” I said and smiled back. “But you know what I mean.”

“I do,” she said and got a faraway look in her eyes. I wondered what she was thinking about.  “What’s going to happen to them?”

I shook my head. “I don’t really know. Not yet, at least. A lot of them end up running away from home. Zane takes them in and …” I trailed off. “You know the rest.”

Adeline shivered, shaking her head as he turned and picked up a peanut butter sandwich. “What if I was allergic to peanuts?” she asked then looked embarrassed.

“It happened before,” I said, remember how scary it was to see someone’s throat closing up, unable to breathe. “Her name was Jackie. She didn’t even eat it. Just being around peanuts made her throat swell up.”

“What happened to her?”

“She went to the ER and got shots or something. I don’t really know.”

“Nate will let us go to the ER?” she asked incredulously.

I gave a small shrug. Nate did… if he thought it was worth it finically. “Some girls. It depends on who, and they always use fake names.”

“Oh,” she said, looking sick. “So… Zane and Nate.”

“What about them?” I asked.

“Nate seems to like Zane.”

I nodded. Like… yeah, that’s one way to put it. “Yeah, he does. I have no idea how that relationship started,” I said, sure she would ask. I remembered when Zane started coming around. At first I thought he was going to be forced to work like me. I quickly figured out that wasn’t the case. “I always thought Nate liked Zane from the start because he had the looks to bring girls in. Now he has the personality too.”

Adeline nodded and took another bite of her sandwich. She looked me over as she chewed. “What exactly do you do?”

“Work,” I said right away. “I clean, cook, do yard work, drop off and pick up girls, bartend at the club sometimes, work in the restaurant if someone calls off.”

“And you never get paid?”

I laughed. She was joking right? Her face was serious. I guess she wasn’t joking. “Oh, sorry. You’re serious? No. Never. That’s not even an option.” I sighed. “Basically, I do whatever Nate tells me to do.”

“Like with Rosie,” she said slowly, implying that she understood I was forced to do some very unpleasant things.

I couldn’t look at Adeline. Just the thought of some of the horrible things I’d done—like dragging bodies into the woods to bury—made me feel ashamed. “Yeah,” I said and pushed those memories away. I flicked my eyes back to Adeline. “What kind of dogs do you have?”

“German shepherds,” she said, eyes lighting up at the thought of her dogs.

“What are their names?”

“Scarlet and Rhett.”

I smiled. “You like Gone with the Wind?”

“Oh my god!” she exclaimed. “You’re one of the very few people my own age who knows who Scarlet and Rhett are! I love that movie.”

“I’ve never seen the movie,” I told. “Just read the book more than once.”

“I haven’t even read the book,” she said with admiration. I smiled. “Is it good?”

I nodded. “It’s long.”

“Do you like to read?” she asked me, leaning a little closer.

“I do. That’s what I do whenever I’m not working.”

“That’s how I used to be. I always had a book with me.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “I like the way books smell. Is that weird?”

“Not at all.” She moved even closer “I have like a million books on my e-reader that I really want to read, but I keep going for my hard copies first. I have a serious addiction to buying books. You should see my bookshelf. It’s overflowing. Literally. Books won’t even stay on it anymore.”

“I would love that. You can never have too many books, right?”

“You are reading my mind,” she said.

Laughter floated through the air vents above us. I could hear the girls walking around, being charmed by Zane.

“I should go,” I said but didn’t move. I didn’t want to go.

Adeline’s eyes met mine, looking as if she didn’t want me to leave either. “Where do you sleep?”

“I have a room upstairs,” I told her. “I used to stay down here, but Zane thought some of the girls looked at me.” It still boggled my mind. Like any of the girls would look at me and like what they saw.  “There’s not much—” I cut off when I heard the familiar creaking of the pantry door.

“What?” Adeline said, gripping the edge of the cot

“Someone’s in the kitchen.”

She jumped up, holding out her hands. “Go! Before you get in trouble!” She walked with me to the base of the stairs. I put my foot on the first step and turned, eyes meeting one last time before I jogged up the stairs.

CHAPTER TWLEVE

“Addie,” I whispered when I plodded down the stairs that next morning. She was lying on her cot, face twisted with fear. “Addie, wake up,” I said again and hurried over. She blinked her eyes open, looking confused. “You’re having another nightmare.”

I set the laundry basket down and knelt next to her, putting my hand on her shoulder. She bolted upright. I yanked my hand back, thinking the touch was too much. But she reached forward, putting her hand on mine. My heart fluttered at the feel of her skin. She wiggled her fingers, lacing hers through mine.

“Thanks,” she said and let go of my hand. She leaned forward, rubbing her eyes. She inhaled and looked up, eyes clouding with worry as soon as she saw my face. “Are you okay?”

I nodded after a moment’s hesitation. It wasn’t a lie… not completely. “I’m really tired. Nate wouldn’t let me sleep until those bushes were dug up.”

“Oh,” she whispered, brows pushing together. “That’s horrible! Why didn’t he make me go out and help you?”

I shrugged. “He said he was punishing me for something I did. That, and I think he’s afraid you’ll try to run again. It’s hard to find people in the dark.”

“I will run again,” she rushed out. “The next chance I get.” Her eyes widened as she looked into my eyes. Then she turned around to Phoebe, who was standing in front of the mirror by the shower “We should leave. The three of us. There’s three of us and two of them. We can do it. We can leave.”

She was right. We out numbered them. Couldn’t we outsmart them too? I ground my teeth, mind turning as fast as it could while being bogged down with a lack of sleep. I crossed my arms and looked at Adeline. Maybe we could… maybe.

“Addie,” Phoebe said in a flat voice. “There no way to leave. We all try, and we all get hurt. It better to stay.”

Adeline shook her head. “No! I’m not for sale. You’re not either. Phoebe, don’t give up.”

Phoebe sighed and pressed her lips into a small smile. “I no want to get hurt. Not anymore.” The smile faded, and she shook her head. “We have no choice.”

Adeline sprang up, fingers curling into fists. “Yes, we do! We always have a choice. Okay, maybe we don’t have a choice in what is done to us, but we can chose to not give up!”

Phoebe’s words rang true. All three of us had tried to get out of here—more than once—and all three of us had been severely punished for it, also more than once. My heart sank a little when I looked back at Adeline. “I wish we could, Addie, but it’s not that simple.”

“All we need is a head start.” The hope didn’t leave her eyes.

A head start? But all three of us… at the same time? “Maybe if we—”

“No!” Phoebe said suddenly. “It won’t work. It never work! You try, I try, she try. We all caught!”

“If we have a plan,” I said, “it could potentially work.”

Someone opened the basement door, throwing it back with such force it slammed into the wall. All three of us startled. I knew it was Zane as soon as I heard the footsteps. Oh fuck. I closed my eyes in a long blink. I was tired, so incredibly tired. But I was still scared of Zane. We waited, not daring to move, until Zane emerged from the steps.

“What’s going on?” he asked. His demeanor was calm and confident, as always. Something evil glowed in his eyes. He was holding a white shopping bag, his fingers curled around the plastic handle. Involuntarily, I tensed. I picked up the laundry basket and kept my eyes down.

“Nothing.”

“Really?” Zane questioned, knowing he caught me in a lie. “Because it sounds like you were talking to the girls.” He took a step closer to me, puffing out his chest. “Did I say you could talk to the girls?”

I shook my head, feeling ashamed. I should stand up to him, if not for me then for Adeline. But I just… just couldn’t.

“Good. Put those clothes away.” Zane said to me then turned to glare at then turned to Addie. “If I’m not mistaken, I believe I heard this one talking about running away. Again.”

Adeline didn’t back down. Seeing her stand her ground awakened something inside of me. “I will run away,” she said through gritted teeth. “And turn you in.”

Zane laughed and rolled his eyes. “Sure you will.” He pushed past her and put the bag on the card table. Slowly, he pulled out two dog bowls and put them on the floor. Next, he opened a can of dog food and plopped it into the bowl. I watched him try not to smile. What the hell was he planning?

He glanced up for a millisecond at Adeline. This was for her; it was to hurt her. No. No way. Not her. He looked up at Phoebe as he pulled a leather leash and a metal choke-chain collar from the bag.

“You,” he said to her. “Fill this up with water.”

Phoebe looked down but walked over and picked up one of the bowls. She kept her body straight, not wanting to lean close to Zane. Awkwardly, her fingers wrapped around the lip of the bowl. She turned, going to the shower to fill it up.

“No,” he ordered when she pulled back the curtain “From the toilet.”

Phoebe knew: don’t think, don’t feel, do what you’re told and avoid the pain. Discontent flashed across her face but she listened and dipped the bowl into the toilet. She carried it back, dripping water on the floor along the way, and set it back down in front of Zane.

My heart pounded against my ribs. I felt dizzy as I watched the scene unfold.

“Adeline,” Zane said, clipping the leash to the chain collar. “I hear you like dogs.” He looped the chain through itself, making a self-tightening circle. A  smile twisted onto his face and his eyes sparkled with delight. He lunged forward and grabbed Adeline’s arm, pressing his fingers into a pressure point on her shoulder. He had done the same to me many times. Pain rippled down my back, so intense it made my knees buckle.

And that’s exactly what happened to Addie. She fell, crying out in pain. Then he put the chain around her neck. A million thoughts went through my head in just a few seconds. I couldn’t stand there and do nothing. No fucking way. I started forward then stopped, heart beating so fast it hurt. My fingers curled into fists.

Zane pushed Adeline forward with his foot, forcing her onto all fours. “Good dog,” he said and yanked the leash. The metal collar tightened around her neck. She couldn’t breathe! He was going to choke her! “Get a drink, dog,” Zane snarled.

“Stop it!” I yelled. “Let her go!”

“Or what?” Zane laughed. Then I snapped. I rushed forward, jumping through the air. My hands wrapped around his throat. I looked into his eyes, wanting to see the life go out. Zane jerked back and tumbled down. I fell on top of him, my grip on his neck loosening. I brought my hand back, fingers curled into a fist, and punched him.

The leash was still wrapped around Zane’s hand. It was pulled tight, too tight. Adeline couldn’t breathe. I brought my fist  down on Zane’s face again. I wanted to knock him out, grab Adeline and run.

“Get the hell off me!” Zane yelled and moved his arm up to block a punch. He brought the leash with him. Fuck. Adeline was going to get choked out. I hit Zane again. Blood dripped down his nose, splattering my face. He closed his eyes and pushed me away. I grabbed the neck of his shirt and lifted him up. I slammed his head down against the floor. I flicked my eyes to Addie. She was turning blue. I sprang up, kicked Zane as hard as I could in the ribs then scrambled to her side.

“Fuck,” I breathed and grabbed the leash, yanking it toward me to get some slack. Adeline wrapped her fingers around the leash, desperately trying to pull it from her neck. I unclipped the leash, letting it fall, and took the collar off of Addie’s neck.

She pressed her hands against my chest, panting for air. Her eyes met mine. I put my hands on her arms, giving her a reassuring squeeze and nodded, letting her know then yes, we were making a run for it. I stood, helping Adeline to her feet.

“Phoebe!” she cried. “Come with us!”

I kept a hold on Adeline’s hand and bolted forward, taking the stairs two at time. The door was closed, looming ahead of us like a mirage. Adeline was in front of me, rushing as fast as she could to get to the top. Panting, I stopped at the top step. Adeline reached out, wrapping her fingers around the doorknob. I looked behind me, scared I would see Zane rushing up the stairs after us.

Phoebe hadn’t come. I didn’t have time to think about that. It was her decision to stay or run with us…and once Addie and I were free we’d send someone back for her and the other girls.

Adeline’s trembling hand slipped off the doorknob. She tried again, throwing the door open. Nate stood in our way at the top of the stairs. No…just fucking no. I looked up and over Adeline’s shoulder and into Nate’s eyes. He was scared. I could use that to my advantage.

“What the hell is going on?” he demanded. I let go of the railing, ready to bypass Addie and shove Nate down and out of the way so we could make a break for it.

But Nate was faster. He put his arms out, shoving Adeline back. Her arms flew out, trying to find something to hold onto. She lost her footing and fell into me, pushing me off balance. I reached for the railing without success. We were falling, and there was no stopping it now. I held onto Adeline, trying to shield and protect her the best I could as we bumped down the wooden steps.

We landed with a painful thud on the cement floor. I saw Zane out of the corner of my eye. His face was a bloody mess. Adeline, who had landed on top of me, wasn’t moving. I could feel her breathing, the air rushing quickly in and out of her lungs. She was terrified. In a swift movement, I flipped her over, using myself as a shield. Nate would have his gun on him. I couldn’t do anything but protect Addie now.

“He attacked me!” Zane screamed as Nate flew down the stairs. “He fucking attacked me!” Zane kicked me in the side. I winced and held onto Adeline tighter to keep her safe.

“What?” Nate cried, his voice high with shock. “Jackson doesn’t fight back. He never has!”

Zane kicked me again. Blood dripped onto the floor, running from his nose. “I’ll make sure he doesn’t do it again,” he said through clenched teeth. I ducked my head in, pressing it close to Adeline. I could feel her heart beat a million miles an hour. Zane continued to kick me until Nate told him to get me up.

Fuck no. I wasn’t getting up and letting Adeline go. They’d have to pry her from my dead hands…which is exactly what Nate was intending on doing. Zane took hold of my arms and pulled. Then it hit me that if they kept the beating up, Adeline was bound to get hurt. If I let her go, she could scramble away and I’d take the pain.

I let her go. Adeline hung onto me. Her eyes met mine; they were filled with tears. Blood ran down her arm, scaring me for a second. Then I realized I was the one bleeding. She was covered in my blood.

“It’s okay, Addie,” I wheezed.

“No!” she cried, tightening her grip on my hand. “No, stop!”

Zane yanked me back but Adeline still held on. I opened my mouth to tell her to let go but Nate rushed in front of me. He raised his leg and kicked her right in the face. She screamed and fell back, blood rushing down her chin.

“Jackson!” she yelled, pushing up. She coughed as blood dripped down her throat. Nate took a hold of my other arm. He and Zane yanked me back. Adeline reached for me. My heart broke and rage flooded my veins. I struggled against Zane. If I could get one arm free, I could hit him then turn on Nate and take my chances. But I couldn’t get free.

“Don’t give up!” I called to Adeline. She had to keep going. There would be a way out of this…somehow she’d get out. She had to! “Don’t ever give up!”

“I won’t,” she promised, tears mixing with the blood that dripped down her face. Zane took a step up the stairs, bracing himself against me as I continued to pull against him. I suddenly went still, countering his balance. He stumbled forward, his grip on my arm loosening. Then Nate punched me in the face.

Adeline stood and ran over. “Stop!” she screamed, hands out as she tried to take a hold of my arm. Nate slapped her, purposely hitting her broken nose. Phoebe ran over and put an arm around Adeline. Zane dug his nails into me and yanked me up the stairs. The last thing I saw was Adeline’s face, broken and covered in tears and blood.

Nate and Zane didn’t stop until I was outside. I thrashed and kicked the whole time but I could feel the fight in me dying. I was exhausted and hurt. But I wasn’t giving up. Nate opened the door and Zane pulled me back, hitting my head against every corner. My vision was fuzzy and the sudden blast of cold air from outside hit me hard.

Zane let me go, falling hard onto the cold ground. Panting, I turned over and pushed myself up. Nate pulled a gun from his waistband and pointed it at me. I froze, heart racing. Sweat and blood ran down my face. I clenched my fists, staring down Nate.

Nate’s usually neat blonde hair was tousled around his face. His faded blue eyes burned wildly.  He looked at me, wishing he could kill me then and there. Then his eyes darted to Zane, his precious assistant, and his partner in crime. Something crossed his face, like a father taking in the sight of his injured son.

He hit me in the face with the gun. I stumbled back, tripping over a mound of frozen dirt. I tripped and my head whacked on the hard ground. Stunned, I laid there for a few seconds, unmoving. Zane was on me in a matter of seconds.

His fists came down on my face one after another, after another. I closed my eyes, trying to catch my breath and find strength inside of me to get up and give it right back to motherfucking Zane. The beating kept coming and by the time I had my hands planted on the cold ground, Zane suddenly moved away.

I opened my eyes and shakily rose to my feet. Zane was holding Nate’s gun, and it was pointed right at me. He wiped blood from his face with his other hand and narrowed his eyes.

Then he pulled the trigger.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

The bullet hit me. The empty round flew up in the air, spinning so far it was hard to see. It landed by Zane’s feet, rolling to a stop right in front of me. The smell of gunpowder and lead hung heavy in the cold, winter air. I fell back, ears ringing from the shot. Warm blood gushed out, spilling onto the ground. My knees buckled and I fell.

Zane stood there, lips curled back over a snarl, watching me bleed. The gun was still extended in his right hand. I blinked, seeing nothing but the hazy sky above me. I wrapped my fingers around my left arm, trying to stop the bleeding. My heart was pounding from fear. My bicep hurt and blood spilled out at an alarming rate.

But I was alive, fucking alive.

The ground crunched under foot. Nate towered over me, looking down. He ran his hand over his hair, smoothing it back.

“You didn’t kill him,” he said calmly. I heard the hammer slide back on the gun. Nate held out his hand. “Wait.” He turned his head to the side, looking at the street. “Don’t attract attention.”

That’s what he was worried about. Not the fact that I had been shot, that my fingertips were pressing against my bare bone, trying to stop from bleeding out. He didn’t want the echoing gunshots to bring attention to his house of horrors.

Then the familiar whirl of spinning tires echoed off the frozen land. Oh, that was what Nate was talking about. Still…it wasn’t uncommon to hear gunshots this far out in the middle of nowhere. I was pretty sure that’s how Zane had gotten away with it before.

“Carry on,” Nate said, his level voice edging on excitement. The next thing I knew, Zane was up on me again, the butt of the gun making contact with my face.

I woke up in the tool shed. I was surrounded in a puddle of my own blood. My eyes fluttered open but I couldn’t get up. I was too weak from blood loss, too sore from being beaten. I opened my mouth but wasn’t able to get out any sound.

This was it. My final moment. At least I was awake to go through it. My mind was too fuzzy for the pain to really register. I bent my  left arm up, hardly able to wiggle my fingers, and turned my head. The bullet had ripped through my skin and muscle. I could see an inch or two of bone. Maybe I should have felt sick, but I was too out of it. I stared curiously, and then moved my right hand over it.

The blood was still warm, but it was getting sticky. Was the wound clotting? Or was I running out of blood? I would bleed to death, I was sure. I didn’t feel cold, and I knew that was bad. It was cold outside, and I had lost a lot of blood. I should feel cold.

I closed my eyes in a long blink, thinking of Adeline. I hoped to God Nate and Zane didn’t go back inside and finish what had started. Fear washed over me. Maybe they had and that was the only reason I was in here and not six feet under. Why else would they keep me alive other than to make me watch Adeline get hurt?

No.

I strained, abs tightening as I tried to get up. I had to save her. Dizzily, I looked around the shed. There were plenty of tools in here. One of them would come in handy. I’d break down the fucking door if I had to. I’d do anything to save her.

I rolled over and pushed myself up onto my feet. My vision blacked out but I made it to the door. I pushed on it, the rough wood digging into my fingers. I was locked in. I rattled the door again for good measure then collapsed back on the ground. Panting, I stayed there for a minute before pushing myself on to my feet again.

I grabbed a shovel. The handle was slick in my hands, which were covered in blood. I hit the door and dust rained down on me, getting into my eyes. The shovel fell from my gasp, clattering to the ground. I was so weak. Sunlight filtered through the small window high above the door, too high and too small to escape through.

My efforts of breaking out of the doors caused my arm to bleed more. I leaned against a shelf, knocking tools to the ground, and looked at my arm. Was the bullet still in me? I didn’t think so. It looked like the shot had blown through my skin and muscle, skimming the bone.

I kept staring at it, seeing little muscle and tendon fragments sticking up. Then I laughed. Zane was just feet from me and he missed. He fucking missed! I slid along the shelf hitting the ground. I landed in my own blood.

Or maybe he hadn’t missed? Maybe this was his intent all along, to make me slowly bleed to death. My eyelids were heavy. I struggled to stay awake and conscious. Slowly bleeding to death was worse… way worse. I was still alive yet dying. I had my thoughts, my concerns. My heart ached for Adeline.

I realized that I was in love with her right as my eyes shut, the whole  world going black.

The next time I woke up, bright lights shone down on me. My mouth was dry and I couldn’t move. Unable to open my eyes, I panicked. Something that had been steadily beeping sped up. What the fuck? I struggled to open my eyes and sit up.

“Hey Bryan,” a soothing female voice said, just inches from me. A hand landed on top of mine. “I’m Elyse. I’m a nurse and I’m taking care of you. You just got out of surgery. I need you to stay calm, okay?”

A nurse? Surgery? Who was Bryan? What was going on? I tried to sit up.

“Bryan,” she said again and put her hand on my shoulder. “Calm down.  Your uncle is in the waiting room. I will go get him.”

I relaxed against the pillows as everything fell into place. I was Bryan. I was in the hospital and the beeping was a heart monitor. Nate was playing the role of my uncle…again.

“And don’t worry,” Elyse continued. “Your uncle told me what happened. The police are already on it. Those guys won’t set foot in here.”

He had told her what happened? Really…If I could have rolled my eyes I would have. How much had Nate paid someone off this time?

I fought against the sedative, wanting to open my eyes and tell the nurse the truth before Nate set foot into the room. Time moved in a funny way while drugged from surgery, and the next thing I knew, someone put a hand on top of mine. The skin was smooth, but I knew right away it wasn’t the nurse.

“Hey, Bryan,” Nate said, his voice calm with just enough compassion to be believable. “It’s your Uncle Nate. I heard you pulled through surgery quite  well. Aren’t you a fighter?”

“He certainly is,” the nurse said.

“I can see why,” Nate said quietly. “I would be too if such a pretty nurse took care of me.”

The nurse laughed. I got pulled back into unconsciousness again. The next time I woke, I was able to open my eyes. Nate stood at my bedside.

“Hello, Jackson,” he said softly. His fingers curled around my wrist as he bent over the hospital bed. “Say one word about what really happened and I will hurt your precious Adeline.” He squeezed my wrist, painfully pressing on the IV in my vein.

The heart monitor started beeping faster. The same nurse from before rushed into the surgery recovery area, looking at the monitor.

“Are you feeling pain, Bryan?” she asked.

I blinked and nodded. She smiled at me then left to get medicine. I flicked my eyes to Nate. He stared at me, gaze unwavering.

“One word,” he whispered, “and I’ll make sure she’s fucked so hard she won’t be walking for a week.” His fingers dug into my skin and he tipped his head down. “Maybe I’ll do it myself.”

I swallowed, mouth feeling dry. Nate didn’t like to so much as touch the girls, with the exception of hitting them. He thought they were nasty and beneath him. But he hated me enough to do it. If he didn’t, Zane certainly would. And he’d make her bleed.

Nate stepped back when the nurse returned. She injected something into my IV then went on to examine me. She started talking about my injuries and how I had an infection in my blood from the wound. Just how long was I unconscious for before Nate brought me here? And why was I here?

Probably like the few other times he had allowed me to get medical attention. I wasn’t valuable to him, not at all. But I had been well trained and broken in. I didn’t think, didn’t feel. I had always done what I was told to avoid the pain.

That wasn’t me anymore. My eyes got heavy. My body relaxed into the pillows as the pain medication took effect. Nate’s figure became fuzzy.

It would be a hassle for him to replace me. That wasn’t a guarantee on my life. To stay alive, I had to act like the old me, like the broken shadow I once was. It was the only way I knew how to get back to Adeline.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Several weeks had passed since I was released from the hospital. I ended up staying there for five days. The gunshot wound wasn’t all that bad. My muscle had been repaired during surgery, and the bone had been intact. I was lucky, the doctor told me. He didn’t seem convinced at my story of being mugged, but he didn’t press. Whenever anyone asked me for details, I’d just repeat, “it happened so fast” over and over. That phrase was always bought.

Nate didn’t take me back to the farmhouse. Instead, he took me upstate to a house he had recently purchased. It was a new two-story house in the back of a nice neighborhood. This place was a halfway house, but not in a good way. Girls rotated in and out of the house all day, having sex for money in the upstairs bedrooms. They were prostitutes, not slaves, and got to keep some of the money. A majority of them stripped at the club as well.

As I worked around the house, keeping my injured arm close to my side and doing all my work slowly, I watched the girls. There were a few who I knew, in a matter of time, would end up at the farmhouse. They’d break easy, and would fall into the ranks of Rochelle. Nate would want to replace her anyway. She was getting old by his standards. I wondered what Zane would do with her. Move her into his room as his own personal sex slave? I suppose it didn’t matter.

There were always two or three armed men in the house. They were there to protect the girls…and keep a leash on me. I was reminded time and time again, that if I stepped one toe out of line, something horrible would happen to Adeline.

Nate or Zane stopped by a few times a week. Zane had fun poking at my stitches. If it weren’t for the girls shrieking in horror, he would have pulled them all out with tweezers. The wound was almost healed and I had a decent sized mound of scar tissue over it. My arm didn’t really hurt, but it didn’t feel completely normal yet either. The fact that I was doing construction to the house didn’t help, I was sure.

But Nate wanted the basement finished, and the construction crew  there for as limited time as possible. It was up to me to do the details like painting, adding trim, and hooking up the appliances.

Now that the inside was done, I expected Nate to have me landscape the yard. But when he pulled up on that cloudy afternoon, he simply pointed to his black luxury car and waited for me to get inside.

He didn’t say a word to me as we sped down the highway. I was a little worried of where we were going. Another job, I was sure. When he turned down the street that led to the farmhouse, something fluttered inside of me.

I had never been happy to see the large, white house before. Never. But when I looked at it, my thoughts flashed to Adeline. I leaned closer to the car window, heart beating faster and faster the closer we came.

I knew I would sneak down to see her the first chance I got. Her face played through my memory; green eyes, full lips, high cheekbones, and golden brown hair. She was so beautiful, but her looks weren’t what I loved about her.

It was her spirit, her fiery passion for a better life. That was what had saved me. Seeing her refuse to give up, time and time again, reminded me that I didn’t have to give up either. I hadn’t given up. Somehow, someway… I was going to get Adeline the hell out of this place.

Nate slammed on the brakes. I flew forward against the seatbelt, the pressure uncomfortable on my arm. Nate’s eyes flicked to me, watching in the rearview mirror. I grimaced in pain just to make him happy. He left the car running and got out to open the front door. He stood in front of the keypad; he must have changed the combination again.  He opened the door and turned, eyebrow raised as he waited for me to step inside.

“No one will be home,” he started, “but that doesn’t mean I’m not watching you. Do anything you’re not supposed to and I will punish Adeline for your misbehavior. I want this house clean by the time I’m home tomorrow.”

My heart sank. Adeline wasn’t here. Where was she? She hadn’t left the house since Halloween, when one of her clients recognized her as the girl who disappeared at the Pride Parade.

Nate pushed me inside and slammed the door. I heard the quiet beep as the electronic locks slid into place. I stood in the foyer, looking around the house. It was a fucking mess. Seriously? Don’t Nate and Zane know how to use a fucking broom? I pushed a clump of dirt across the foyer floor with my foot.

I sighed. Cleaning the whole house wasn’t something I wanted to do, but doing so when no one was home wasn’t so bad. I set to work right away. The sooner I got this done, the sooner I could go into my room and lay down. I had been sleeping on the couch in Nate’s new house, and it wasn’t comfortable at all.

It took me three hours to get the kitchen and living room clean. I trudged upstairs, slowly making my way down the hall. My bedroom door was open. I stopped in the threshold, shaking my head.

Zane had trashed the room. Bags of garbage had been dumped over the floor, the mattress was off the bed, and my possessions—as minimal as they were—were thrown amongst the garbage. It took me an hour and a half to get everything clean and do my own laundry. I remade my bed and put my clothes away before showering and going down stairs to get something to eat. Then I planned on sleeping in peace and quiet until Nate and Zane returned.

I made myself a turkey sandwich and sat down at the island to eat it. I was halfway done when I thought I heard something. I froze. Was Zane in the house, trying to scare me?

I set what was left of the sandwich down and looked around, holding my breath. What was that? It sounded like a cough…maybe. It was muffled. I shook my head; I’d been all over the house cleaning it. There was nowhere for Zane to hide. Besides, he wouldn’t wait this long. He was too impatient for that.

With a sigh I took another few bites. Then I heard it again. I stiffened. It was definitely someone coughing, and it was coming from the basement. I thought I was alone. Who was in the basement? And more importantly…why?

I set my dishes in the sink and walked to the basement door, wiping my hands on my pants. I took a breath, pausing with my hand on the lock, waiting. I didn’t hear anything, but I had. I knew I did.

Throwing a nervous glance behind me, I shot back the deadbolts and opened the door. The basement smelled musky, mixed with body odors and urine. It was fucking disgusting. I turned on the light above the stairs and quietly moved down.

There was no one down there. The cots were empty, the shower wasn’t on, and no one sat at the card table. What the hell? Maybe I’d finally cracked and I was going insane. It might be a nice alternative to reality.

I turned to go upstairs when I heard it again. A sniffle followed by a wheezing cough. I whirled around, my eyes darting around the basement. There was no one—

“Fuck,” I said out loud and rushed to the closet. It was the same small, nasty closet that Nate made me lock Adeline in when she first got here. It was locked with a deadbolt, and I needed a key to open it.

Whoever was locked inside coughed and moaned.

“Hello?” I asked. No one responded. I knelt down, slowly moving my face toward the door to peer through the small hole where the doorknob would have been. It was dark, too dark to see. I moved to the side to allow more light to spill in through the small hole.

Then I saw her, laying face down on the cement floor. Adeline. I shook the door, desperate to get in.

“Addie,” I called, voice wavering. “I’ll find a way in,” I promised and flew to the vanity table, pushing makeup and brushes out of the way. There was a way to pick the lock; I’d seen it down in movies. Granted I hadn’t seen a movie in years, but it was worth trying. I bent two bobby pins until  they broke. My hands were shaking as I knelt in front of the door, sticking the small pieces of metal into the lock.

The minutes ticked by and I was no closer to freeing Adeline. I wasn’t going to give up. Grunting with frustration, I tried again. I needed something stronger. I went back to the vanity and grabbed a metal hair clip. I hurt my hand breaking it apart, but it worked.

Finally, I got the door open.

“Oh God,” I said when I saw her on the floor. Her hair was a tangled mess, sticking to her sweaty covered face. She groaned but didn’t move. Something was strapped to her ankle. I narrowed my eyes in the dim light. I recognized it. Not all that long ago, Nate made me wear it, the GPS tracker. Like the devices used for people on house arrest, the trackers Adeline was wearing would send a signal to Nate if it was cut off, or if she set foot out of her allowed area.

“Shit,” I whispered and bent down. Her cheeks were flushed. “Addie?” I asked and gently pressed my hand to her face. “You’re burning up.”

Her eyes fluttered open. She stared at me, unable to focus. “Jacks…” she started saying my name before her eyes closed again.

“Don’t talk,” I said quietly. “How long have you been down here?” Her eyes fluttered opened and closed a few more times. “It doesn’t matter.” She looked ragged, so sick she was barely hanging on. I scooped her up, holding her close to me. Her arms hung limply at her sides.

She tried to lift her head up as I went up the basement stairs. Her eyes rolled back and I had to pause to make sure she was still breathing. My arms trembled, but not from her weight. I was scared by the time I got her up and into my room. It was then that I’d realized she was too sick for me to help her.

“Am I dead?” she asked, her voice barely louder than a whisper. I pushed open my bedroom door.

“No, you’re not,” I told her. And she wasn’t going to be… not if I could help it.

“What is… you… you…” she started but wasn’t able to finish her thoughts.

“Don’t worry about anything right now, Addie. You’re really sick.”

“Okay,” she panted.

I carefully put her on my bed, resting her head on a pillow. I pulled the  covers back and tucked her in, debating on whether or not she should be covered up when she had a fever. Deciding I just wanted her comfortable for now, I kept the blanket over her.

“I’ll be right back,” I said and hurried out of the room. I raced  downstairs, taking a bottle of Tylenol from the guest bathroom. Nate might notice, but I didn’t care. I rushed into the kitchen, sliding to a stop by the sink.

When my mom lost custody of me, I was in and out of foster homes until my grandparents got me. I liked my grandpa. He was dying of cancer and only made it a few years once I came to live with them. Once he passed, everything went down hill and my grandma started drinking and doing drugs…again.

I remembered my grandpa making this nasty tea whenever one of us got sick. I closed my eyes, trying to recall everything he put in it. I warmed up water in the microwave and rifled though the pantry, looking for ingredients. I put honey, a cough drop, lemon juice, and a shot of whisky into the mug and stirred until everything was dissolved. I shuddered at the smell; it was nasty, but always made me feel better. I took that, the medicine, and a bottle of water upstairs.

Adeline’s eyes were closed. I paused in the doorway, hot tea slopping  down the front of the cup and onto my hand. For a moment, Adeline didn’t breathe. Then she took in a weak breath. Was I too late? I wished I had a phone, or a way out of the house. As soon as I opened or broke a window, the alarm would go off. Someone would be here in just minutes, and Nate would most likely kill us both.

I sat next to Adeline and put my arm around her shoulders, gently pulling her up. Her head bobbed, but she sat. “Here,” I said and lifted the cup up to her lips. Slowly, I tipped it up and poured a little bit of tea into her mouth. “It tastes gross,” I told her as she coughed and turned her head, moaning in pain. “It will help.”

I tipped the cup again and she drank a few gulps. Then I helped her drink as much water as she could. My fingers trembled. Was she dehydrated? Would this be enough?  Her head fell to the side. I capped the water bottle and laid her down, brushing her hair back out of her eyes. Then I pulled the blankets over her and sat at the foot of the bed. I wasn’t sure what I’d do if she got worse…but at least I’d be here.

I leaned against the dresser, trying to keep my eyes open. It was sometime in the middle of the night, and Adeline was still asleep. Her breathing was irregular; I stayed up watching her chest rise and fall, making sure she didn’t stop breathing. I didn’t know what I’d do if she stopped breathing. Just the thought terrified me.

I opened a book, attempting to read but was too tired. My head slumped to the side and I dropped the bottle of Tylenol. It went rolling away. I took in a breath and forced my eyes open, reaching out to get it. As soon as my fingers wrapped around the plastic container, Adeline inhaled.

“Addie?” I asked, suddenly wide-awake. I got to my feet. She struggled to sit up, blinking in the dim light. I had turned on the lamp on my dresser; it didn’t illuminate the room very much. She looked me up and down. Her eyebrows pushed together and she shook her head.

“You’re alive,” she whispered.

I half smiled. “Yeah, I am.”

She blinked back tears. “But they shot you.”

I looked at my left arm, remembering the pain all over again. I pushed up my sleeve to show Adeline the scar. “They did. I can’t decide if Zane’s aim is really horrible or if he meant to just clip me all along. Don’t worry about me right now. I’m worried about you.” I put my book down and sat on the edge of the bed, not wanting to get too close and make her uncomfortable. “Do you think you can swallow pills? We need to bring your fever down.”

She nodded. I got up to get the water and the Tylenol. She swallowed the pills and drank the rest of the water before collapsing against the pillows. It was weird to see her like this. She was so full of fire, refusing to give up. Yet here she was, so sick and weak she couldn’t sit on her own.

“Where am I?” she asked and looked around the small room.

“This is my room,” I replied. Adeline looked surprised. “Nate brought me back the day he left. I thought you were with them, but then I thought I heard something in the basement and I found you locked in the closet.”

“You found the key?”

“No. I picked the lock. It took almost half an hour. Didn’t you hear it?”

She shook her head. “I don’t remember. You shouldn’t—”

“Addie, you could have died. There’s a few scratches on the lock, but I don’t think Zane will notice.”

She nodded, eyes closing again. After a few seconds, they flew open. She looked right at me “We should run.”

The words caused my heart to skip a beat. I looked away. Adeline was too sick to run. I didn’t think we’d make it far enough away in time. She didn’t have the strength. “Nate changed the combinations on the doors. I can’t get out, and I have no idea where he put the keys to the Blazer. We would literally have to run. On foot… and you’re really sick.” I moved my eyes to her feet, thinking of the ankle bracelet. “They’d find us. It would only be a matter of minutes before Nate sent someone this way.”

She only nodded and ran her eyes over me again. I shifted nervously. “Where were you?” she asked.

“After I got shot, I was in the hospital for a week. The wound got infected. Then Nate took me to a house he just bought upstate. I wasn’t allowed to come back here until I was done doing renovations.”

“Renovations?”

“Yeah. Nate owns a lot of houses.”

“Full of girls, right?” she slowly asked.

“Yeah. There are probably a dozen girls at the new house.”

She bit her lip, eyes going dark. I recognized the deep hatred. I felt it too. She shivered again and wrapped her arms over her chest. “Why are you back here?”

I shrugged. My guess was as good as hers. “I finished the work on the other house, and Nate won’t admit it, but he can’t function without me.” I could still smell the lingering scent of garbage in the kitchen. “I guess he’s used to having me do all his work. This place was a disaster when I came back.” I sat back down at the door of the bed. “I’m glad you’re okay. He used you as a threat, said if I tried to tell anyone what happened he would hurt you.”

My eyes met hers, holding her gaze. She didn’t just look at me, but into me, and smiled. Then she began coughing, hand flying to her chest as each cough hurt. I took the empty water bottle to the sink and filled it up, extending it to Adeline.

“I’m so tired,” she said after getting a drink.

“You need more sleep.” She still had dark circles under her eyes and his cheeks were flush. “I’ll be right back,” I said, deciding to make her another cup of tea.

“It’s that gross stuff again,” I said when I got back into the room. I gave her the mug. “It helps, trust me.”

“I believe you,” she said and drank it all.

“Get some sleep, Addie,” I urged.

She nodded, but didn’t take her eyes off of me. “I can’t believe you’re alive,” she whispered. “What you did for me. And… and then…” she sniffled back a cough.

“Adeline,” I said gently, remembering the way I felt when Zane put that dog collar around her neck. Never again. I would never let him hurt her like that again. “It’s okay. I’m okay. I hate that you thought I was dead. The whole time I was gone, I wished I could get a message to you, to tell you what happened. I knew they would make you think the worst.”

“But Lily saw Zane digging a hole.” She wiped away tears with the back of her hand.

“He really played it up,” I muttered to myself, cursing Zane. “Get some sleep. You need to rest.”

“Okay. You too,” she said, eyes flicking to the dark widow.

“I will,” I promised and grabbed my book from the dresser, holding it up to show her I was going to read. “I’m just not tired yet.”

She looked at me, not believing what I had said. She was too tired to argue. She laid back down and was asleep in just minutes. I sat back down and read through one chapter before I fell asleep. I woke up a while later with a stiff neck. I was still sitting slumped against the dresser. I stood and stretched, checking on Adeline. Her breathing was still shallow and she wheezed with each breath.

She was still flushed; I gently touched her forehead. Still hot, I pulled the blankets back just a little, exposing her arms. I cracked the window to get some fresh air in the room. Barely able to keep my eyes open, I laid down on the floor next to the bed and fell asleep.

I woke up to someone stepping on me. I sat up, my hazy mind thinking it was Zane. But then I saw Adeline, scrambling up. She had gotten out of the bed and tripped over me, landing on her hands and knees.

“Are you okay?” I asked and rushed over to her.

“What are you doing on the floor?” she asked, blinking at me. I stood and helped her to her feet.

“I didn’t think you’d want me sleeping next to you,” I confessed then felt embarrassed the thought of sleeping next to her even crossed my mind. I looked into her green eyes. Some of the redness was gone, and she looked more like her old self.  “And I didn’t want to leave you alone. Your breathing was kind of shallow. It, uh, made me nervous. You look better now. I mean sound. Sound better now.”

She weakly smiled. “I feel a lot better. What was that nasty stuff you made me drink?”

“You don’t want to know,” I said with a smile. “It’s an old family recipe with a little bit of everything in it. My grandpa used to make it for me when I would get sick. He said it ‘burned the fever’ out of me, though I think the alcohol just made it worse.”

She bit her lip, deep in thought. What was she thinking about? I tipped my head, watching her. Just when I was about to ask, she smiled. “Well, whatever it is, it helped,” she said. “I don’t feel like I’m going to burn up from the inside anymore.”

I put my hand against her forehead. “Not from the outside either.” I let my hand fall and looked into her eyes. We stood there for a few seconds, just looking at each other. But it wasn’t awkward. My stomach fluttered and my heart skipped a beat. “Are you hungry?” I blurted when I felt blood rush to my cheeks.

“Yeah. I haven’t felt hungry in days.” She ran her hands over her hair.

“That’s a good sign. I’ll make breakfast,” I said before turning to the dresser. I opened the top drawer. I didn’t have much; I kept what little clothes I had in neatly folded stacks. I took out a white T-shirt and blue exercise shorts, handing them to Addie.  “I’m assuming you want to shower and change.”

She took the clothes, her fingers brushing against my skin. She nervously eyed the bathroom. “I do.”

“There are towels in the cabinet under the sink. I’ll stay out until you’re done. Take your time,” I said, knowing there wasn’t any warm water down in the basement. There wasn’t even cool water down there. Only cold—icy cold. I went downstairs, closing the bedroom door behind me.

I opened the fridge once I got into the kitchen, debating on what to make. My options were slim; Nate must not have done much if any grocery shopping while I was gone. Finally, I found frozen sausage in the freezer. I thawed it in the microwave and  biscuits in the oven. I listened to the water running upstairs, hoping to be done with breakfast by the time Adeline was out of the shower. I only needed twenty minutes.

She beat me; the water shut off when I started making the sauce. I loaded everything on the tray, impatiently waiting for the sauce to bubble and be done. Finally, everything was ready and I went upstairs.

Adeline was sitting back in bed with the blankets around her. Her eyes lit up when I walked into the room. Then she looked at the food and smiled, happily taking a bowl.

“Do you like biscuits and gravy?” I asked. I should have asked her that before. “I just assumed and made it. I can make you something else if you don’t like it.”

“I love it,” she said with a smile and took a bite. “It’s delicious. You’re a good cook.”

I sat at the foot of the bed. I longed to be closer to her, to feel her skin against mine. But I didn’t want to cross any lines. Besides…what if she didn’t want me that close to her?  “I’ve never cooked for you before today,” I said, raising an eyebrow.

She shook her head. “You brought me barbeque chicken and mashed potatoes.”

“Oh, right. I forgot about that. Still, that’s only two things.”

She looked up at me, eating a few more bites before speaking. “I can always smell what you make. And it always smells good.”

I shrugged, not really sure how to handle the compliment. “Thanks. I like to cook. Everyone leaves me alone when I do.”

“You know how messed up that is?” she asked.

I raised my eyebrows and sighed. “I know how messed up everything around here is.” It was more than messed up. Adeline was sick and we were trapped in the house. Not to mention that we were both slaves…

“You have a lot of books,” she said, looking at the pile of books on the floor.

I nodded. “Nate lets me read. It keeps me quiet, I guess. Reading is a good way to escape the hell we’re in.”

“I had just gotten an email from one of my favorite authors the day I was taken,” she said with a smile. Her eyes met mine, almost sparkling at the thought. Then the light faded and she looked like she had been punched in the gut.

“You okay?” I asked.

“Yeah,” she said, blinking back tears. “Memories,” she explained with a shake of her head.

I hated seeing her so sad. “What do—well, did you do for fun?” I asked, hoping that was a safe subject to talk about.

“Read, but you know that,” she answered. “I liked to train my dogs. Scarlet is certified to do therapy. In the summer, we’d go to nursing homes and this school by our house for disabled children. The kids love her. We used to do agility, but she’s too old for that now. I was going to start working with Rhett over the summer.” She paused, taking a few seconds to gather her emotions “And I like anything that has to do with the paranormal. Lynn, my best friend, and I go ‘exploring’ anywhere remotely creepy to try and find ghosts. I like to paint too, but I’m not very good at it. I might have an unhealthy obsession with Dr. Who. And sometimes I play video games.” She looked at me “Saying it all out loud makes me sound like a nerd,” she added with a small smile.

“I don’t think so. It all sounds fun,” I told her “I don’t believe in ghosts.”

“Really?”

I nodded. “Really. I’ve never seen one.”

“Not yet,” she said with a smile. “Jackson?”

“Yeah?”

“How old are you?”

“Twenty-three,” I said.

“What’s your last name?”

I hadn’t thought about my last name in years. It was almost hard to recall. “Porter. My turn. What’s your favorite movie?”

“Hocus Pocus.”

“I’ve never seen it.”

“Are you serious?” she asked, baffled.

“Yes.”

She smiled. “Well, some day we will watch it together.”

“I’d like that,” I said, eyes locking with Adeline’s again. My heart sped up and I had the urge to wrap my arms around her and keep her safe and warm. She yawned. “Tired?”

“Yeah,” she said quietly.

“Me too,” I said and stood, taking her empty bowl and setting it on the tray on top of the dresser. “As creepy as this makes me sound, I stayed up to listen to your breathing. For a while it really sounded like you were struggling for air.”

She smiled at me again. I really liked seeing a smile on her face. “I felt like it. I kind of still do, but I think I coughed a lot of it up in the shower.”

“Nice,” I said and wrinkled my nose. I went around the bed to my spot on the floor. “Wake me up if you need anything, Addie.”

She nodded and settled down into bed. “Jackson,” she said suddenly. “There is enough room for both of us. You don’t have to sleep on the floor.”

“Are you sure Addie?” I asked slowly, heart skipping a beat again.

“Positive,” she said and patted the spot next to her. “It’s more comfortable than the floor.”

“That is true.” I shook my head and my hair fell into my eyes. I pushed it back, thinking. “Hang on,” I said and hurried out of the room to grab a skinny pillow from he guest room. I sat on the bed and put it between us. “I won’t touch you,” I promised.

“I know you won’t,” she said. And she meant it.

I smiled. “Good.”

She relaxed, turning so that she was facing the window. As much as I wanted to be close to Adeline, the thought made me anxious. I had never been close to anyone willingly. I had never cuddled, never kissed, and certainly never had sex because I wanted to. I wasn’t really sure what to do…or what I’d do. Would I even enjoy it? Was I too damaged to have a normal relationship?

I blinked. What the fuck was I even doing, thinking like that? I couldn’t have a normal relationship. Not here, anyway.

Rain pattered against the windows. The wind picked up, blowing mist into the room. Adeline pulled the blankets over her head. I got up, closing the windows so that they were only open about an inch. I got back into bed, carefully sticking my feet under the covers.

“Are you cold?” I asked her.

“Not yet,” she said.

“Okay. I can close the windows if you get cold.”

“You don't have to. The fresh air feels good.”

“It does,” I agreed and closed my eyes. A few seconds passed before Adeline spoke.

“My mom used to get mad at me when I’d leave the windows open and it was cold,” she said. “She would say I’d have to start paying the bill to run the heater.”

Her voice broke at the end and I knew thinking about her family brought on a wave of sadness. There was nothing I could do, no words that could ease her pain. Instead, I put my hand on the pillow, as close to her as I dared, letting her know I was there.

Slowly, she moved her hand up and let her fingertips brush against mine. My heart sped up. Everything inside of me wanted to comfort Adeline, to make her happy. I gently curled my fingers around hers. Adeline pushed her hand up, linking our fingers. I swallowed hard, nervous, and moved my thumb to her palm, slowly rubbing circles against her skin. She relaxed, eyes closing.

“Jackson?” she whispered.

“Yeah?”

“How did you end up here?” she asked slowly and opened her eyes.

My mind flashed to that day. The feeling of complete betrayal was still strong. I tensed. I hadn’t gone into detail about that day with anyone—ever. “It’s a long story.”

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” she said, tightening her grip on my hand.

“I do.” I squeezed her hand back. “My mom was sixteen when she had me,” I started. “In the beginning she tried. She married my biological father when she turned eighteen. I remember living in this shit-hole of an apartment with them. My mom used to tell me that we were happy back then, but it was never true. Dad drank and Mom smoked, and she didn’t limit herself to cigarettes. They fought, and the fights got physical. When my mom wasn’t around to beat up, my dad took out his anger on me. I was in first grade when child services got involved.

“My parents got divorced, and that was the last I ever saw of my dad. My mom became depressed and started doing more drugs and got herself arrested. That didn’t go too well for me, as you could have guessed, so I got taken away. I was in and out of foster homes for a year before my grandma, my Mom’s mom, legally adopted me. Like mother like daughter. She still smoked and drank and life was hell. She’d blow her money on drugs and booze and forget to buy me food. And clothes. And toys—forget it. I didn’t have anything the other kids in school had.”

I paused to take a breath. The memories came flooding back and I was drowning in dark water. I looked at the ceiling above us, concentrating on Adeline’s hand in mine, on the way her hair smelled like shampoo, on her soft breathing. “But I knew how to mix cocktails,” I forced a laugh. It was far from funny, but it was the truth. “I still don’t think she ever met Nate before the deal. It was one of those friend-of-a-friend kinds of deals. When I was twelve, she sold me to him.

“Nate used me for a while, but the clients interested in males like them young. I was too old already. So he put me to work in other ways. It was simple stuff at first, like cleaning and yard work. When I looked old enough, he made me work in the club, mixing drinks, serving food, like I do now. I guess I was helpful enough to keep around, since I’m still here.”

The words hung in the air, the memories swirling around me, trying to suck me backwards into a black spiral of self-pity and despair. I had always gotten sucked in before, despite how hard I kicked my legs and flailed my arms.

But not this time.

This time, Adeline had a steady hold of my hand, keeping me tethered to the here and now. She tightened her grip then let go, putting her hand on my arm. Something ran through me. I closed my eyes, wanting to feel more of her. Any fear I had of getting close melted away with the heat of her skin. She traced her fingers up, gently touching the scar over the bullet wound.

Then she moved the pillow from between us and leaned in, wrapping her arms around me. Her breasts crushed against my chest. Her heart pounded right along with mine. Her legs brushed against mine and her hair fell into my eyes. She buried her face into my chest and time stood still. I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around her, pulling her to me.

Holding Adeline in my arms felt better than I ever imagined. She comforted me as much as I comforted her. Having her there, pressed up against me, was so real and emotional. I held nothing back and yet she was still here, tightly wrapped in my embrace.

She put her hands on my chest and leaned up, looking into my eyes. She smiled and pushed my hair back, running her fingers through its length. No one had ever touched me like that, wanting to make me feel good. I wanted to feel more of her.

Her eyes moved from mine to my arm, and she pushed my sleeve up, inspecting the bullet wound. Tears pooled in her eyes as she ran her finger over it. She blinked and they fell down her cheeks.

“Don’t cry, Addie,” I said softly, pushing back my own emotions. She closed her eyes, eyebrows pushing together. I gently wiped the tears away. “It’s okay,” I said, knowing it was far from the truth. “Somehow, it’ll be okay.”

She only nodded and laid back down again. I grabbed a box of tissues and a water bottle. She blew her nose and apologized.

“I must look disgusting,” she said.

I shook my head. “You look sick, not disgusting.”

“I feel sick,” she said and grabbed another tissue.

“Go back to sleep,” I said, wondering if she’d want me to leave. I hoped not.

“Jackson?” she asked, almost desperately. “Will you stay?”

I couldn’t help but smile. “If you want me to.”

“I do.”

I grabbed the long, skinny pillow, ready to put it between us again. Adeline shook her head and laid down with her head on my chest. I wrapped my arms around her, lips pressed against the top of her head. Adeline fell asleep in just a matter of minutes. I tried staying awake, not wanting to miss a moment of being with her.

It felt so right, having her cuddled next to me. I never wanted to let go. I closed my eyes and kept my arms locked around her body. Soon, I fell asleep too, not waking up until later that day. After eating dinner, we sat on my bed watching the sunset…and waiting for Nate and Zane to come back. I draped a blanket around Adeline’s shoulders, keeping her warm as the cold wind blew in through the window.

I sat next to her, and she leaned toward me. Feeling nervous, I took her hand in mine. Then she closed her eyes and rested her head on my shoulder. For a moment, everything felt right. I could pretend we were somewhere else, not trapped in this house as slaves.

So much had changed in the last few months and yet it was all the same. The same routine, the same abuse… but I was different. I had changed. And I had Adeline to thank for it.

“Addie?” I began.

“Yeah?” she answered, not taking her head off my shoulder.

“Do you remember when you said I don’t seem dead inside?”

She looked up at me “I do.”

“And I said that I had until recently?”

“I remember.”

“Well,” I began, nervous. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to tell her. “It was you. You brought me back to life.” I let out a breath. It felt good to say that out loud. “It was getting hard finding hope after all these years. I was so close to giving up. And then I met you.”

She twisted toward me, taking my other hand. My heart skipped a beat and I wanted to kiss her.

“I hated myself for doing nothing,” I continued. “I should have stopped Zane and let you run away. But I didn’t, and now...” I trailed off. I hadn’t let myself fully process everything until this moment. “Now I hate myself for being glad that I didn’t do anything.”

“What do you mean?”

“I never would have met you. Not if you had run away. I would have let myself die inside without you. You’re so full of fire. You haven’t lost hope. I’ve never met anyone who can hold onto who they are in such a horrible situation. You saved me, Adeline. And now I want to save you.”

Warmth ran through me, awaking all my senses. I pulled her closer, eyes locking, and tipped my head down. She moved in closer. I tightened my embrace and pressed my lips to her forehead. Adeline melted against me. I ran my hand over her hair.

Her fingers trembled ever so slightly as she reached around me, sticking her hands under my shirt and against my skin. Then she suddenly stiffened, pushing me away. The blanket fell from her shoulders and onto the floor.

I froze. Fuck. I didn’t mean to scare her. What the hell was I thinking?  I had moved too fast, touched her too soon. I felt horrible.

“I’m sorry!” she panted, reaching down to get the blanket. “It’s not you. It’s… it’s…” she didn’t finish talking. Her words turned into sobs.

“Addie,” I said gently, still feeling like it was my fault. “It’s okay. It was my fault. I didn’t think about it. Do you want me to go so you can get some rest?”

She quickly shook her head. “No. I like being with you,” she said and motioned for me to sit next to her again. “I want to be able to be close to you.”

Her words were alluring. It would take time, for both of us maybe, but it was well worth the wait.

“Okay. Take it slow,” I said and moved next to her again. She twisted toward me, running her eyes over my body, slowly leaning closer until her shoulder brushed against mine. I took her hand in mine, gently rubbing my thumb over her palm again. She closed her eyes and rested her head against me. Carefully, I put my arm back around her.

“Is this okay?” I asked softly.

“Yes,” she whispered back and put her hand on my arm. I felt her body relax. I closed my eyes and put my head against hers. It was okay for me too. More than okay, really. Being with Adeline made things almost make sense again. For so long I was convinced there was nothing good in this world, that I had no reason to continue living.

She was my reason, and I would do whatever it took to keep her safe and set her free.

Suddenly, the front door slammed shut, rattling the entire house. I went rigid.

“Shit,” I swore. “Zane’s home.”

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

“What do we do?” Adeline asked, green eyes wide with fear.

I struggled to stay calm for her sake. I looked at the door, scared Zane would appear at any second. I turned my attention back to Addie, jaw set. I stood. I wasn’t going to let anything happen to her. Ideally, she could sneak downstairs before he noticed. If not… well I was ready to do whatever it took to keep her safe.

“Stay here,” I said. “H-he probably won’t go downstairs right away.”

“Probably.” She took in a sharp breath, twisting the sheets in her hands. She let her breath out only to quickly inhale again.

“Adeline, stay calm. It’s going to be okay. It has to be.” It had to be. I didn’t come back, nurse Adeline back to health, and get closer to her just to have it all end. It was going to be okay. I moved toward the door, mind racing. “I’ll come get you when I can. Just, uh, be quiet.”

I stepped out of the room on the verge of panicking. What the hell was I going to do? Maybe I should tell the truth—well a variation of the truth. That Adeline was on her deathbed and I was, uh, protecting  Nate's investments. No, Zane would never buy that. And I didn’t think Nate really cared about what happened to Adeline. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, I was sure the only reason he hadn’t killed her was because she was less likely to be discovered here in the house. Bodies get discovered in the woods more often than you’d think.

I squeezed my eyes shut and took a breath to calm myself. It didn’t work. Fuck. I had to appear calm, like nothing out of the ordinary was going on. Hell, I had to act like I didn’t even know Adeline was in the house. I put one foot down and marched forward. I made it down the stairs just as Zane was coming through the living room.

He was dressed in all black, his signature color. His hair was perfectly styled and his blue eyes shined. His lips curled back when he saw me.

“I was wondering,” he snarled, “how many times you can almost bleed to death without something… something permanent… happening. I’m guessing you only have one more close call.” He lunged forward. “Don’t fuck up.” His eyes narrowed and he pushed me into the wall. “Be ready to get the girls from the club when I come out.”

Then he went upstairs, untucking his shirt as he went. His bedroom door closed. I whirled around and raced back to my room.

“Addie?” I whispered as soon as I got inside.

“Oh, thank God,” she answered.

I looked around but didn’t see her. “Where are you?” I asked as quietly as I dared

She emerged from inside the shower. “I was hiding in the bathroom.”

“Oh,” I said and moved closer to her. I stole a glance behind me and into the hall, eyes settling on Zane’s door. “You have to hurry. Zane is changing. Go, now!”

Adeline nodded and rushed forward, stopping in front of me. I put my hand on her lower back and gently ushered her forward. I ducked out of the room first, making sure Zane’s door was still closed. I swallowed hard, heart beating a million miles an hour. If Zane opened the door while we were in the hall, we were fucked. I would hold him off the best I could and tell Adeline to run for it. I could only hope she’d break a window and get out in time…or before Zane shot and killed me.

It took forever to get to the top of the stairs. Adeline went down first, running as fast as she could through the living room. If Zane stopped to listen, he would know two people were racing through the house. We didn’t slow down. Neither of us stopped until we were at the basement door.

Adeline’s hand trembled as she threw back the locks and opened the door. She hurried down the stairs; I was right behind her. We stopped at the bottom of the steps, shaking.

“I’ve never been glad to be down here,” she panted, turning to me.

“Me neither,” I agreed. “That was close. Too close.”

She let out a ragged breath and nodded “Yeah.” I looked at the closet. I didn’t want her to go back inside. But she had to, and she knew it. Adeline’s face tightened but she walked to the closet door.

I extended my hand, letting my fingertips brush against hers. When she didn’t back away, I laced our fingers and stepped closer. “I have to pick up the girls now,” I said.

She only nodded, not looking away from me. Her hand tightened around mine and painful longing clouded her green eyes.

“I don’t want you to leave,” she whispered, her voice edging on desperation. My heart painfully swelled in my chest. I missed her already and I was terrified of what Zane would do to her. I closed my eyes, leaning in so my forehead touched hers. It was beyond frustrating, being unable to protect her the way she deserved.

“I don’t want to leave either,” I whispered. “Not without you.”

My stomach twisted. If only I could get her out of the house. We could drive away together. But that fucking house arrest bracelet on her ankle muddled the plan. We wouldn’t get far enough away from Zane. Bullets travel faster than cars; especially the crappy Blazer I had to drive that was overdue for an oil change. It would conk out if I slammed the gas all the way down.

I took a step back, looking into Adeline’s eyes one more time before I went up the stairs and heard Zane descending down from the second story. I quickly locked the basement door and moved into the mudroom, waiting for him to give me the keys and unlock the door.

I kept my eyes on the doorknob, mind drifting to Adeline. Already, I missed the way she felt in my arms. I missed the steady beating of her heart, and the way she made me feel like life wasn’t hopeless after all.

“Hey,” Zane said as he walked into the room. I turned. He threw a glass of cold water at me, splashing in my face and down my shirt. Then he punched me hard in the stomach and pressed a Taser into my side. “I never welcomed you home,” he laughed, twisting the Taser. The electricity rippled through me, traveling down my legs and rendering them useless. I crumbled to the ground. Zane kicked me in between the legs, still laughing.

“Get up, fucktard,” he said, and then stepped on my hair, grinding his heel into the floor, making the hairs pull at my scalp. Strands of hair snapped and pulled. “I said get up.”

I reached up, shoving his leg away. Was it possible to pull the Taser from his hands and press it to his chest, holding the button down and sending sparks to his heart? It might be…maybe. Zane moved away, punching in the code to  unlock the door. He threw the Blazer’s keys at me.

“Pick up the girls from the club,” he ordered. “Do anything you’re not supposed to, and I’ll shove my cock so far down Adeline’s throat she’ll choke on it.”

Anger flashed through me and I envisioned myself grabbing Zane, ramming his head against the wall, and cutting off his dick. When I got to my feet, I saw he was holding his M9. Motherfucker. Another time… there had to be another time when I’d have the chance.

I picked up the Blazer’s keys and stiffly walked into the garage and across the driveway. I drove as fast as I dared to the club; I wanted to get back to the house. I didn’t like Adeline being there alone with Zane. I parked along the curb to the club and hurried inside. Lily was on the stage, watching Rochelle work the pole. Rochelle stepped to the side and motioned for Lily to try.

It made me sick. Lily was young, no older than fifteen. And she was turning into a mini Rochelle. I hated seeing it, but I knew it was inevitable. Lily had come from nothing. She had run away from an abusive home. Zane saved her from hell, and for a while her life was good. Then she was in too deep with nowhere to go. She was perfect, exactly the type of girl Nate and Zane wanted. Broken, with nothing, from nothing. She was easily convinced she was cared for, loved even. She was getting to the point of wanting to please Zane.

Like I said, sick. Just fucking sick. She grabbed the pole and lifted her body off the ground, legs wrapping around the shiny metal. She twisted until she was upside down, getting tips from Rochelle the whole time. I moved through the tables, looking for Phoebe. My stomach twisted even more when I saw her slumped over in a booth. Her head was in her hands and her shoulders sagged.

Suddenly, Lily dropped to the ground.

“Son of a bitch!” she said, rubbing her elbow. She pushed herself to her feet and looked at me, mouth open. Her eyes widened and she looked scared. She turned to Rochelle and pointed to me, face going white. She blinked and pushed her strawberry blonde hair back. “Jackson?” she whispered.

Rochelle waved her hand at me and shrugged. “Yeah? So what? He’s here to take us home.”

“But… but… he’s like dead,” Lily stammered, unable to take her eyes off of me.

Rochelle rolled her eyes. “No, he’s not. Obviously.”  I stopped in my tracks. She had known the whole time that Zane hadn’t killed me. And she hadn’t told the other girls. That was low…even for her. She truly was Zane’s puppet.

“I’m not dead,” I stated, not knowing what else to say.

Lily moved her head up and down, still stunned. I walked beside the stage to Phoebe. She hadn’t looked up or even moved.

“Pheebs?” I asked, gently putting my hand on her shoulder. She feebly tipped her head up.  Her olive skin has lost its rich color. She was pale with dark splotches on her face and hands. My stomach twisted into an even tighter knot. Fuck. She was sick. Really sick. I knew right away rest and Tylenol wasn’t going to be enough to cure her.

She blinked, and then said something in Vietnamese. I shook my head. She took in a deep breath and smiled.

“You alive,” she said, her accent heavier than normal. “Addie be happy.”

My heart skipped a beat at the sound of her name. I knew Phoebe and Adeline had become friends, but I didn’t know they were that close. Adeline must have told her how she felt about me. I couldn’t help but smile.

“She will,” I agreed. I looked back at the stage. “Ready?” I asked.

Lily jumped down and came over to me. She stopped then wrapped her arms around my shoulders. I stiffened before hugging her back.

“I’m glad you’re not dead,” she said. She let me go and stood back, grinning. “Or a ghost. That’s like what I thought when I saw you.”

I smiled back. “I’m glad I’m not a ghost or dead either.”

“Where have you been?” she asked.

Rochelle stomped off the stage. “Lily!” she said, annoyed. When Lily’s blue eyes flicked to Rochelle, she faked a smile. “You’re getting so good at the pole. Maybe you can come with me this week and  perform.”

Fear flashed across Lily’s young face. She blinked it away and smiled. “Ohh, that would be, like, totally awesome!”

I looked down. No, that wouldn’t be awesome. While the girls didn’t get touched as much while in the club, clients tended to request them even more after seeing them half naked on the stage. It sickened me.

“Aren’t we going?” Rochelle asked, brown eyes wide. She pressed a smile and glared at me. I helped Phoebe to her feet, taking the keys to the Blazer from my pocket. Rochelle tapped her foot impatiently with one hand on her hip.

She looked like a model, standing there in a short pink dress. Her hair was pulled back in a messy bun and she wasn’t wearing makeup. I didn’t see Rochelle not done up too often. I thought all the makeup and hair extensions she always wore covered her natural beauty.

“Yeah,” I said, keeping hold of Phoebe’s arm. She wobbled when she walked. She leaned on me and I swallowed the lump of worry that was rising in my throat. I helped her in the car. Lily bit her lip when she looked at Phoebe. Then she closed her eyes and shook her head, pushing the worry away.

It was dark when we got back to the farmhouse. The girls went right downstairs and I didn’t get a chance to see Adeline. I made a late dinner for Nate and Zane, cleaned the kitchen, and then walked through the living room, heading to my room. Nate was sitting on the couch, flipping through a magazine. I hesitated on the stairs.

“What could you possible want?” Nate asked me without looking up.

“Phoebe,” I stared. “She’s sick.”

Nate looked up, giving me a blank stare. “The China girl?”

I nodded. “She’s from Vietnam,” I corrected. “She needs medicine. I think if you took her to the doctor, she’d be fine and ready to work again.”

Nate flipped the page. “She’s working just fine. And no.”

“But—”

“—No,” he said calmly and closed the magazine. He looked at his watch and smoothed his hair. “It’s easy to come across another girl like her. She’s getting old anyway.”

I blinked. Even after all these years, Nate’s cruelty took me by surprise. His complete disregard for human life was disgusting. I plodded up the stairs with a heavy heart. I liked Phoebe. She’d been here about a year and though our interactions had been minimal, I grew to care about her. I didn’t want her to die from some horrible infection. It would be a painful death, drawn out for days as she withered away.

I had seen it before, more times than I wished to remember.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

I got up early that next morning to take Lily and Rochelle to a mansion an hour away. They had been bought for a bachelor party. After I dropped them off and pulled away from the large house, I wondered if the bride-to-be knew her fiancé was paying for sex.

Nate left right after I got back to the farmhouse. I made breakfast for Zane and set aside two plates for Phoebe and Adeline. When I heard Zane get into the shower, I dashed up to my room and rustled through the box of books, looking for a particular novel.

The edges were tattered and worn, but I didn’t think Adeline would care. I pulled a black hooded sweatshirt from my dresser and wrapped Gone with the Wind inside of it. I took the blue fleece blanket off my bed, leaving me with only a sheet and a thin quilt. I didn’t hesitate; Adeline needed it more than I did.

She was sleeping when I snuck into the basement. Phoebe was up, just sitting in her bed. I set the food down and tucked the sweatshirt and book under Adeline’s quilt before laying the blanket over her.

“You okay?” I asked Phoebe.

She nodded. “Just tired.”

“Get some sleep. Are you cold? I can bring you a blanket too.”

She smiled at me. “I go next to Addie if I cold. You good to her.”

I shrugged. “I’m trying.”

“You like her?” she asked and stretched her arms in front of her. I grabbed a plate and took it to Phoebe before it got cold. Her eyes sparkled at the sight of buttered toast and sausage. She folded the toast in half and took a bite.

“Yes,” I blurted and felt myself blush. There was no point in lying to Phoebe. “I do like her.”

“She like you too,” she told me with her mouth full. “She cry lot when you leave.”

I shouldn’t have smiled at that, but I did. Being liked, missed, wanted…it was so strange. But it was also so nice. Then I shook my head, reason raining on my parade. “There’s no point, right?”

Phoebe coughed then shook her head and took another bite of toast. Sweat glistened along her forehead. She looked ragged. “I tell her you bring food. Go before caught.” Her eyes flicked to the bottom of the stairs. I nodded and left the basement.

I didn’t get a chance to see Adeline until later that day. Nate kept me busy with work around the house. Finally, Zane left to do God knows what and Nate went upstairs and got in the shower. I unlocked the basement door and hurried down the stairs.

“It’s me,” I called down to Adeline and Phoebe.

“Good,” Addie said as soon as I came into view. She smiled, her whole face lighting up. I loved when she smiled. It was like the past months of pain and abuse were erased from her face.  “Phoebe’s sick,” she said and the lines of worry came right back.

“I noticed when I picked her up, I could tell.” I hurried to Adeline. “She’s not herself.”

“Will Nate let her go to a doctor?” Adeline asked, hopeful.

Fuck. I didn’t want to tell her the truth; that Nate didn’t care and was going to let Phoebe suffer. I couldn’t look at Adeline and lie. I cast my eyes down then sat next to her. She moved closer to me, her arm brushing against mine. The feeling of her skin on mine sent jolts of electricity through me. I took her hand and pulled her closer.

“What aren’t you telling me?” she asked.

I sighed, knowing the truth was inevitable. I pulled my fingers from her and put my arm around her. I hesitated, hand hovering above her waist, gauging her reaction. I wasn’t going to touch her if it wasn’t more than okay. When she didn’t object, I held her close. She leaned in.

“I told Nate she was sick,” I said.

“And?” Addie asked, eyebrows going together.

“He said that she was easy to replace. H-he doesn’t care. I’m sorry, Addie.”

“It’s not your fault,” she said with a shake of her breath. I looked across the cots at Phoebe, who was sleeping. Her breath rattled each time she inhaled. “Thanks for the blanket and the book.”

I involuntarily tightened my embrace “You’re welcome.”

She twisted in my arms, hooking hers around me. “Can you stay down here with me?”

“I can,” I said, and something warm bubbled through me. I brushed her hair back over her shoulder. “For just a few minutes though. Nate is in the shower. You can tell when the water shuts off.” I glanced at the pipes above us.

“I kind of picked up on that,” she yawned.

“Tired?”

“A little. I still feel kind of sick,” she said, sounding guilty.

“Do you want to lie down? I can leave.”

“No,” she said quickly. “I don’t want you to go.”

I smiled. “Then I’ll stay.”

Nervously, I held out my hand, almost pulling it back before I placed the palm of my hand on her back. My heart fluttered. Adeline closed her eyes, letting out a slow breath. She leaned forward, her head resting on my chest. She moved her hand to my shoulder, pulling herself into me. I closed my eyes and tipped my head down, my lips brushing against her ear.

“You’re worried about her, aren’t you?” I softly asked.

“Yes. And not being able to do anything just makes it worse.” Her shoulders sagged.

I held her tighter, wishing I could block out everything bad. “It does. I wish I could make her better. I wish I could make all of this better.”

She inhaled and pressed herself completely against me. I could feel her pulse bounding through her body. Her breasts, covered only with my black sweatshirt, crushed up against my chest each time she inhaled. I felt little tingles of desire, something I hadn’t felt before.

My heart raced and I bent my head down until our noses touched. My muscles tightened as the feeling of being turned on grew.

“I’d do anything for you,” I whispered.

“I know,” she whispered back, moving her hand to the bullet wound. I closed my eyes and rested my forehead against hers. Slowly, I moved my hand up, cupping her face and bringing her to me. I paused, making sure this wasn’t too much. Adeline turned into me, fingers curling around my shirt. She inhaled and held onto me so tight it was as if she was afraid of letting go.

“Jackson,” she whispered, tears rolling down her face.

“Adeline,” I whispered back. “Don’t cry. I promise, somehow it’ll be okay. Somehow, some way I’ll get you out of here.”

She took in a shaky breath and nodded, blinking the tears away. Tears collected on her long lashes. Then she looked up, into my eyes. She looked past the abuse, past the years of pain, and saw me. Scars and all. She looked at me like I was worth it, like I mattered.

I couldn’t help it. I closed my eyes and kissed her. Her lips, soft and warm, pressed against mine. It was then, in that one fleeting moment where time stood still that I knew no matter what, I was saving Adeline Miller.

Her lips parted and she leaned into the kiss, hands grasping at my chest. I pulled away, just enough to talk.

“Are you sure this is okay?” I asked.

“Yes,” she whispered, not moving away. “I am sure. Is it for you?”

“Yes,” I said with a smile. I wanted to kiss her again, to taste her, to feel her tongue in my mouth. I wanted all of her.

“I hope you don’t get sick from me,” she added with a half smile.

“It’d be worth it.” I enveloped her in my arms and leaned against the wall. She relaxed against me, running her fingertips along a winding scar on my arm. I never wanted to let her go.

The pipe above us quivered when the water was shut off. Adeline stiffened and we sat up. Her eyebrows pushed together, causing a line of worry to form between her eyes. I put my hand on her cheek. Her skin was soft and warm.

“I wish I could stay with you,” I said quietly.

“Me too. You should go before you get caught.” She looked into my eyes and leaned in.

“I should,” I said, lips brushing hers as I spoke. I didn’t move away from her.

“Jackson, go. Before you get in trouble,” she said, sounding dejected, though she hadn’t unwrapped her arms from around me. With a heavy sigh I stood, running my hands down her arms, letting them linger on her for just another second before I crossed the basement. “I’ll set medicine for Phoebe on the top step. I’ll come back when I can.”

She forced a small smile, unable to rid the dejection on her face. “I know.”

I nodded and forced myself to go up the stairs. It hurt, sliding the locks into place. I hated this. Fucking hated it with everything inside. I felt like I was going to boil over and explode in a fury of rage. Hell, I wanted to. I wanted to go after Nate with a sharp object. I wanted to make him hurt, make him bleed. Or better yet, trap him in the basement and never come back. Let him waste away to nothing and rot all by himself.

I wanted him to feel pain. Pain like we had, pain that hurt not only our bodies but also our souls. Pain that was damaging, that changed a person. The kind of pain that never goes away, that never heals. It can only be covered with scar tissue, padding the wound but never closing the gaping holes left in the heart.

I wanted him to hurt, to bleed. And I wanted to do it right fucking now.

Nate had given me a list of errands to run. He didn’t threaten me; I already knew that if I did one thing wrong, if I tried to alert attention to the house, that he’d hurt Adeline. He would kill her and I knew that. If the cops were coming, he’d still slit her throat before he went down. That’s just the kind of person Nate is.

I couldn’t stop thinking about the way Adeline’s lips felt pressed against mine. I wanted more of her, and I hoped she wanted more of me. And it was okay if she didn’t. What she had gone through…she was lucky to make it this far and still have her personality.

She was still on my mind when I put the last of the groceries away. I kept glancing at the basement door, hating how it kept us apart. Zane was in the living room, getting personal with a pretty blonde girl I’d never seen before. He would have his fun with her, sink his claws in her and convince her he really loved her.

Then he’d own her.

I didn’t know how he did it. Literally, I got it. He manipulated the hell out of girls who already were weak or broken, who needed someone to lift them up in some way or another. But how could you live with yourself knowing you destroyed something so beautiful as an innocent life?

I shook my head and closed the pantry door. I stole another look into the living room; Zane had his arms along the back of the couch. His head was back, and I didn’t see the blonde girl. I arched my eyebrows and shook my head. Who the fuck gets a blowjob in the middle of the living room when there were people around?

Oh, that’s right. Zane. Fucking Zane.

I turned back to the basement. Did I have time to sneak downstairs and see Adeline? I could pretend to be doing laundry or bring her food, or something—anything to see her again. I put the last of the produce in the fridge. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Zane stand and zip his pants. Dammit. He put his arm around the blonde, whispered something in her ear, and walked her to the door.

She looked at him with puppy dog eyes, batting her lashes together like a lovesick schoolgirl. My fingers curled into my hands. I hated Zane with every fiber of my being. I ground my back teeth. The next time I caught him with his pants down, I was going to kill him.

I should have done it then. I imagined it in my mind: sneaking up behind him, putting my hands on either side of his head, and twisting, snapping his motherfucking neck. I would have felt bad for the blonde girl, but I didn’t care whose mouth his dick was in. I swore to myself that if I had the chance to do it, to kill him, I was taking it.

“You want to take a turn?” Zane sneered at me, catching my eye. He grabbed his crotch and narrowed his eyes. “You miss it, don’t you?” He moved into the kitchen. “It’s been a while since someone paid you to suck them off.” He tipped his head. “Maybe you need some practice?” He backed away, laughing. “Get in the car.”

“Where are we going?” I asked, taking slow steady breaths to keep myself from panicking. I worked hard to keep the memories of being bought by clients out of my head.  It was years ago… that didn’t happen now…it was years ago. I closed my eyes in a long blink. It was years ago…years ago.

“It doesn’t matter where we are going,” Zane said and took the keys to his Camaro from his pocket. “You do what I tell you.”

I nodded, trying to keep my mind from wandering. It was years ago for me, but not for Adeline. How I’d love to hurt Zane. I clenched my teeth together. I would. Someday soon. I would hurt him and we would leave.

Zane turned the radio up,  bass pounding, on the way to Davenport. It was a little odd he had me come with; he only did when someone had to go inside to get one of the girls. Poor Phoebe. As if being sick wasn’t bad enough…

Zane sang along to the music, and I hated that he had a decent voice. Other than being a sociopath, the man had no flaws. Fuck him. I stared out the window, squinting in the sun. We pulled into a neighborhood filled with nice townhouses. I straightened up. Something was familiar…

Right. A creepy-ass old man with an obsession with dolls lived in this neighborhood. I hadn’t been here in years…not since Felicity died. I shuddered. This guy was one fucked up fuck. Zane walked close behind me as we went up the sidewalk. I stepped onto the small stoop and rang the doorbell. A minute passed. Zane huffed and leaned against the house. I rang the doorbell again. Finally, the door opened.

“Adeline!” I gasped in horror when I saw her; her pretty face caked in makeup to look like a porcelain doll. My heart fell out of my chest,  each beat painful as it pounded against the rough cement. What was Addie doing here? She didn’t leave the house. No…no…not her.

Her eyes met mine then flicked to Zane. I snapped myself out of the shock and held my hand out, holding open the door for her to walk through. A silver haired man stood behind her. His eyes trailed down her body, and his erection was obvious in the dress pants he had on.

I didn’t realize my shoulders tensed or that my hands turned into fists until Adeline gently touched my arm. The heat of her skin on mine relaxed me. I cast another glare at the creep behind us and ushered Addie out of the house, making a mental note of the address. Someday, justice would be served to every man that violated Adeline. One way or another.

The car ride back to the farmhouse was tense. Adeline sat in the back, rubbing the makeup off on her sleeve. Zane kept watching her in the rearview mirror, and then he’d glance over at me. He knew I had feelings for her. Was he trying to see if she cared about me too?

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

I spent the next day fixing things at the club. Right when I was getting ready to leave, Nate stopped by and told me I was filling in for the bartender that was out sick. Usually, I didn’t mind bar tending. The busy hours got stressful, but the attention was always on the girls and not me. That night, however, I watched the clock, waiting for 4AM to roll around. I was tired, my arm still hurt from being shot, and I wanted to see Adeline.

Nate locked my in my room when I got home. Not having eaten all day, my stomach painfully grumbled. I showered, needing to get the smell of sweat, sex, and smoke off my skin. Then I collapsed into bed and dreamed about Adeline.

A week went by before I had a chance to talk to her. I brought down food in the mornings, before she was even awake. Then Nate put me to work or kept me locked in my room. At first I thought he was doing it on purpose, trying to keep us apart and unable to talk. Then I realized it was because he wasn’t home. Maybe he was setting up another business endeavor?

I got up that morning and cleaned the house. Zane lost a round in the video game he was playing and took it out by punching me in the stomach until I puked. He laughed and pushed my face in my own vomit, then left the house.

After I was cleaned up, I made a tray of food for the girls and went downstairs. I looked for Adeline as soon as my feet hit the cement. She was sitting on Phoebe’s cot. I flicked my eyes to Phoebe in question.

Adeline’s green eyes dimmed and she shook her head; Phoebe wasn’t any better. I looked at the floor and moved to the table, setting the tray down. My muscles twitched as I held back, resisting the urge to run to Adeline and envelope her in my arms. We were so close, yet so far. She was just feet in front of me but a world away.

She got up and went to the table, pushing the food around. I picked up the full laundry basket, purposely dropping it. Addie knelt down to help me pick the clothes up.

I picked up a pair of fishnet tights, shoving them back into the laundry basket. “Are you okay? I wasn’t expecting to see you at that house.”

“I know,” she said, reaching for my hand. She stuck her fingers through mine and gave it a squeeze. Our eyes met. She was even closer to me, with her hand in mine. And yet she felt even farther away.  “Nate brought you back for more reasons than to do housework.”

“What?” I whispered.

“It hit me when I saw Zane’s face when you guys picked me up. He knew it would upset you to see me. He knows that you like me, and he likes hurting you so…”

“I did wonder why he came with,” he said, realizing that I was right. I pushed more clothes back into the basket.

Addie shook her head. “He will use me against you.”

“I know,” I said ruefully and gave her a smile, letting her know it would be okay…somehow. “You can’t let them know you have feelings for me. No matter what. You can’t let them have that advantage over you.” I stood, carrying the laundry basket. Rochelle was watching us in the mirror. I had to get upstairs, fast. Rochelle would report to Zane. “I’ll come back when I can,” I added and hurried into the laundry room.

My muscles twitched uncontrollably. My eyes rolled to the back of my head and I couldn’t close my mouth. Zane pressed the Taser harder against my side, laughing. My head hit the tile floor in the kitchen and my arm screamed, the weight of my body against the bullet wound was too much.

He let go of the button and stood, shaking the Taser. Then he pressed it to me again, his other hand balling the hem of my shirt around the neck, twisting the fabric until it cut into my skin. He let go again and stood.

“Huh,” he said, shaking the Taser once more. “Must be running out of batteries. You’re still conscious.” He heavily sighed. “There goes my fun for the night.” He kicked me. “You always fuck everything up.”

He actually believed it was my fault his Taser ran out of batteries. Not like it would be from overuse on me…no. I drained the energy with my mind or something. He kicked me again and traded the Taser for a knife. He pressed it into my shoulder, the tip sharp through my shirt. Then in a swift movement, he brought his hand down, slicing open my shirt and cutting my skin. He flipped the knife around, pressing the rounded handle into my torn open skin. He smiled, blue eyes glinting with pleasure from hurting me. He straightened, wiped the blood on a towel, and walked away, his footsteps echoing as he jogged up the stairs.

Panting, I laid on the floor. The electric shocks weren’t as strong as usual, but it still hurt. My skin tingled. I blinked away the dots that floated in my vision. I took in a breath and put my hand on my left shoulder. The cut wasn’t deep, at least. Once I was able, I got to my feet and grabbed the already  bloody towel from the counter. I stuck it inside my shirt to soak up the blood.

The kitchen was still a mess from dinner. I closed my eyes in a long blink and went to the fridge. I poured myself a glass of lemonade that I wasn’t supposed to drink, and sat at the island counter. I finished my glass and with a sigh, got up and cleaned the kitchen. Then I took the girls’ clean clothes out of the dryer, looking forward to seeing Addie.

I unlocked the door and opened it. “Shit!” I swore when I saw someone standing in the doorway at the top of the stairs. “I wasn’t expecting that,” I said to Adeline.

“I knew it was you up there,” she said.

“Really?” I asked, looking behind me to make sure Zane wasn’t in the living room. Then we went down the stairs. “How?”

“Who else washes dishes?” she asked ruefully.

“True.”

She stopped at the bottom of the stairs, whirling around. “What happened?” she asked and took the laundry basket from me and set it down. Her eyebrows pushed together as she reached out, gently touching the tattered edge in my shirt.

“Zane,” I said and shook my head.

She pulled her hand away; her fingers were wet with blood. “You’re still bleeding.”

I shrugged, and the movement was painful. She gently put her hand over the wound to try and stop the bleeding. “It’ll stop eventually,” I said.

“I hate this,” she said, looking like she might cry.

“It’ll be okay,” I said, taking her hand in mine. “Somehow, it has to be okay.”

“I almost believe that,” she whispered and moved closer, resting her head on my chest. My heart fluttered when she wrapped her arms around my waist. Being close to her took the pain away. “At least let me wash the blood off,” she said.

I nodded and let her lead me to her cot. I sat while she blotted away the blood with a wet washcloth.

“Thanks,” I told her, watching her chest rise and fall as she breathed. She pulled the neck of my shirt out to get to the wound but her eyes moved down along my chest. She pressed the cloth against the cut and stuck her other hand inside my shirt.

“What is this from?” she asked, tracing a jagged line of scar tissue across the right side of my chest. I had so many scars; I wasn’t sure which one she was asking about. I put my hand over her, feeling the scar.  Oh, that one. I internally cringed just thinking about it. I curled my fingers over hers.

“Broken glass. Five years ago.”

She set the cloth on the ground and pushed my sleeve up, running her finger over five, straight scars on my right forearm. “What about these?”

“Razor blade. A few months ago,” I told her. It had actually been a punishment related to her and how much trouble she had caused Nate. Because again, nothing was ever Zane’s fault. But Addie didn’t need to know that.

“And this?” she whispered, her breath hot on my skin. She pressed her lips to a rough patch of skin on my neck. Warmth flowed through me. I wrapped my arms around her.

“Fire poker,” I whispered back. “Right out of the fire.”

Her lips were still pressed against my skin. She put her hand under my shirt, fingers tracing another scar on my side. It was several inches long and indented a bit. Zane super gluing fabric to my skin then ripping it off caused that one. Layers of skin came with it. I hoped Adeline didn’t ask me about that one. It would upset her too much.

I reached up, cupping her face in my hand. I tipped her head toward mine and kissed her. Everything faded away. The pain, the blood, our fucked up lives… none of that existed. It was just me and Adeline, alone in the basement. The warmth grew hot as Adeline ran her fingers through my hair. She moved closer, deepening the kiss.  My heart pounded and I began to feel aroused. She leaned back, bringing me with her. I kept kissing her as we laid down on the bed, me on top of her.

“Are you sure?” I asked, feeling almost guilty for getting turned on by her.

“Yes,” she breathed, and pulled me closer, her breasts against my chest. Her nipples, small and hard, pressed against me. My desire grew, pushing against the seam of my jeans. My fingers shook as I ran them over her body. Wanting to be with someone was new to me. It was exciting…and a little terrifying.

I pushed my tongue past her lips and into her mouth. Right there with Adeline was where I was supposed to be. There was nothing else. Just our two pounding hearts, and one kiss, a kiss that set my soul  on fire and reminded me of everything good in the world.

I stopped kissing her, moving my head up just enough to look into her eyes. My heart was racing and I swallowed hard. “Adeline,” I whispered. It was her. She was all I needed. “I think I love you.” As soon as the words left my mouth, I was scared. What if she didn’t feel the same?

She smiled. “I think I love you too.”

I smiled, gazing into her eyes. I didn’t need anything but her…her smile, her eyes, her spirit and her fight. She was the key to breaking me out of the dark hell I’d been in. I loved her, all of her, and now I knew I had to save her.

She ran her fingertips up and down my back. I leaned down, putting my lips to hers again. I wanted more, to give myself to her, get lost inside of her, only thinking about how good it felt to be together. She wrapped her arms around mine and pulled me back down. She wanted more too.

I eased back over top of her, keeping my hardness from pressing into her. I didn’t want to move too fast. I’d let her make that move.

“Is this okay?” I asked, needing to make sure.

“Yes,” she whispered, hands resting on my back. “It’s perfectly okay. I can’t explain it, Jackson, but it’s different with you. It just feels right. I want you. I want this.”

“I do too,” I said with a smile. She held onto me tighter, not wanting to let go. I wiggled closer, slowly moving my leg over hers.

Then the floorboards creaked. Neither of us moved. I could hear my heart pounding in my ears. Slowly, I turned my head toward the stairs, positive I’d see a beam of light spill down the wooden steps. I sighed with relief. No one was at the top of the stairs.

“You should go,” she whispered.

“Yeah,” I agreed and rolled over onto my side, spooning Addie. It was a tight fit on the small cot. Adeline twisted, facing me, and hooked her leg over mine.

“I wish you could stay,” she said. “I want to fall asleep in your arms. I feel safe when I’m with you.”

“I’ll do anything to keep you safe.” I kissed her forehead.

She gently touched the scab over the bullet wound. “Does it hurt?” she asked.

“It feels weird,” I told her. “My muscles feel tight around it, and the skin is tingly but has no feeling at the same time. Weird.”

“What would happen if they found you with me?”

“Kill me. Seriously,” I said. She tensed and pressed her head against me. I held onto her tighter, wishing I could take away her fear. “But we won’t get caught.”

“What if we do? Jackson,” she said and pushed herself up onto her elbow. “No, we can’t. You can’t. I don’t want you to die.” Tears pooled in her eyes and she shook her head, hair falling into her face.

I pushed her hair back and wrapped my arm around her shoulder. “Addie, I’d rather live one day with you than a hundred without. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

She relaxed under my embrace. “But then I’d be alone.”

“You have Phoebe,” I said and massaged her shoulder. “You’ll be okay…somehow.”

She sat up and pushed my hand away. “Stop it!”

“Stop touching you?” I asked, jerking my arm away from her.

“No. Stop acting like you’re going to die!”

“Addie,” I started. She needed to know it was more than possible…it was inevitable.

“No!” She shook her head and closed her eyes. I sat up and pulled her to me. “Don’t say it.”

Before she could say anything else, the front door opened and shut, shaking the frame of the old house. I tensed and got off the cot. Adeline groaned in frustration, not wanting me to leave. It hurt, knowing that I could go up the stairs and she couldn’t.

“The basement door isn’t locked,” I explained. It would be obvious I was down here with her. “I’ll come back,” I promised. I looked into her eyes, missing her already. I needed one more kiss, to feel her against me one last time. I hurried to the stairs, sliding to a stop. I reached for the railing and stopped, turning around and running back to Adeline. I embraced her one more time, pressing my lips to hers.

Taking a deep breath, she nodded and looked at the stairs. I let her go and turned, forcing myself to go up. Zane and his friend Lou—a large, muscular black man—stood in the foyer.

“Jackson!” Zane yelled. I emerged from the kitchen, tugging at my pants, which were still tight around my erection. “Go get the China girl. She’s at the apartments in Des Moines.” His eyes narrowed and he puffed his chest a bit, showing off for the new guy. “Lose her or fuck up in any way and I’ll…I’ll fist your precious Adeline in the ass so hard she’ll be shitting blood for a week.”

I blinked, reminding myself to stay calm. Now wasn’t the time to go ape shit on Zane. Not with Lou here. I nodded, heart racing. Someday I would make Zane regret saying things like that about Addie. It was only a matter of time.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

“You look…different,” Phoebe said as we got into the Blazer. She looked at me, tipping her head. She still had dark circles under her eyes and her skin was pale.

“I do?” I asked, putting the Blazer in drive.

“Yeah. Almost…almost happy,” she said.

I wouldn’t consider myself happy, not at all, but I had been thinking about Addie the entire drive into the city. Being with her, sharing more than one passionate kiss… that had made me happy.

“You think of Addie?” she asked with smile.

“Maybe,” I said, smiling too.

“You see her?”

I pressed on the gas. “Yes. Before I came to pick you up.”

“She working?” Phoebe asked, concerned for her friend.

“No, I, uh…uh went downstairs to see her.”

Phoebe turned, raising her thin eyebrows at me. “You make her happy.”

“I hope. Nothing else makes her happy.”

Phoebe started coughing. I took my eyes off the road and looked at her. She held up her hand, signaling she was okay. “It better than nothing. Just no get caught. You get hurt, Jackson. Addie too.”

My fingers tightened on the steering wheel. “I know. I don’t care if I get hurt, but not her. I won’t let her get hurt.”

“She care if you hurt,” Phoebe pressed. “Very much. Addie so sad when thought you shot.”

I pressed my lips together. I flicked my eyes to Phoebe. “You’re right. I’ll be careful.”

“Good. Me no want to see anyone get hurt.”

“I don’t either,” I assured her.

She rubbed the sides of her head and said she was tired. She rested her head against the window and closed her eyes. She was sleeping when we got back to the farmhouse. The sun was setting, the sky a brilliant shade of orange. We walked in the house, Phoebe stumbling and weaving along the sidewalk. I had to catch her more than once.

Two suitcases sat next to the door in the foyer. Nate stood in there as well, tapping his foot and checking his watch impatiently.

“I need you to take these to the club,” Nate told me, eyeing the suitcases. I knew better than to ask what was inside. I picked them both up; they were light. I guessed they were full of clothes. Lily and Rochelle had yet to return. They must have been bought for another night and were in need of a wardrobe change.

I returned late and was locked in my room by Nate. I tossed and turned, thinking about Adeline and worrying about Phoebe. When I finally drifted to sleep, I dreamed that Adeline and I had escaped and were building a new life together. Together. I woke up wishing it was real. I wanted it so bad it hurt.

It was late in the morning when Nate let me out of my room. I cleaned the house, did Zane’s laundry, and then took a shower. I carried another basket of laundry down the stairs. Zane and Lou were in Zane’s room playing video games. Nate was in his office with the door closed, talking on the phone about an auction. He held one every other year. It was his way of getting rid of girls who didn’t bring in enough money. I’d been to more than one. It was fucking disgusting, the way the girls were paraded around like they were racehorses. If the buyers paid an extra fee, Nate let them ‘try them out’ before they purchased.

The girls weren’t just bought for a night. They were bought for good, going home with the buyers never to be seen again. I never knew what happened to them.

I dumped the laundry in the washer and ran to the basement door.

“Addie?” I called, opening the door and coming down the stairs. She was sitting on her cot, reading Gone with the Wind. I smiled, until she looked up. Her eyes were red and puffy and her bottom lip quivered. My heart stopped beating. “What’s wrong?”

She shook her head, tears filling her eyes. Fuck. What the hell had happened? And where was Phoebe? She blinked, tears rolling down her cheeks, and pointed to Phoebe’s empty cot. I took a few steps closer.

Then I saw her, lying on the ground. My throat began to close and I couldn’t breathe. Phoebe’s eyes were open, staring lifelessly up at the ceiling. Blood had dripped down the side of her mouth. I could tell Addie had tried to wipe most of it away.

I dropped to my knees, putting my fingers on Phoebe’s neck, desperately feeling for a pulse. Her skin was cold and her body rigid. She had been dead for a while. Dizzy, I stood, unable to take my eyes off of Phoebe. Adeline had put a pillow behind her head and covered her with a blanket.

My heart was pounding. I blinked, shaking my head. Then I turned to Adeline and rushed over.

“Fuck, Addie,” I said and pulled her to me. I wrapped my arms around her, trying not to shake. “I’m so sorry.”

“I tried,” she started, voice strained as she tried not to cry. “I tried but it didn’t work. I couldn’t get it to stop and then I broke something.”

I moved her hair over her shoulder and let my fingers trail up and down her back. “What are you talking about?”

Tears streamed down Adeline’s face “She fell and had a seizure. Then she stopped breathing and I couldn’t find her pulse.”

I tried to sooth her as she broke down in sobs. I hated that Adeline was alone, trying to save Phoebe. I could only imagine how horrible it must have been. Her body went limp. I scooped her up, holding her close to me, and sat on the cot with Adeline in my lap.

“I won’t let this happen. Not anymore,” I said. “I can’t... we can’t. I hate seeing you get hurt. Let’s run.”

“Really?” she asked, opening her swollen eyes.

“Yes, really.” I pulled her to me, lips pressing to hers. She reached up and took a handful of my hair, tangling it between her fingers. I held onto her, never wanting to let go.

I didn’t hear the basement door opening until someone walked down the stairs. We stood up so fast Adeline almost fell to the floor.

“What the fuck are you doing down here?” Zane asked me, eyes angry yet excited at the same time. He loved a good punishment.

“Phoebe,” I said, motioning to the empty cot. “She’s dead.”

“Shit,” Zane swore, looking annoyed. “No wonder it smells like ass.”

Adeline bit her lip and looked down. I watched her tears splatter to the floor. “I’ll take the body,” I said. I wanted to bury Phoebe properly. She at least deserved that.

“How dead is she?” Zane walked around he cot, covering his nose with his arm. He pushed at Phoebe’s body with his foot. “She was supposed to work. Maybe … ” he shook his head, inspecting the body. “No, not fresh enough.”

What a sick motherfucker. The look of horror on Adeline’s face only fueled my rage. Zane ran his eyes over Addie, wrinkling his nose in disgust. He rushed over, lifting his arm.

“Don’t touch her,” I said through gritted teeth, hands curling into fists at my sides.

Zane laughed. “Get the fuck out of the way,” he ordered. “Unless you want me to shoot you. Again.” He pulled a black pistol from his back and flicked his wrist, pointing with the gun. “Over there. Now.”

“No,” I said, staring him down.

“Very well.” He flicked the safety off the gun, then sighed, looking at Phoebe’s body. “I really don’t feel like dealing with two bodies. Last chance. Move.”

My heart pounded in my throat. The last thing I wanted to do was listen to Zane. Then I imagined my blood splattering Adeline’s face. I didn’t want her to have to watch me die. I let out a breath and stepped to the side.

“Get dressed,” Zane ordered Addie.

“What?” she asked, voice thin.

“Are you deaf?” he snarled. “Put something else on. I don’t want to be seen in public with you. When was the last time you showered?”

Adeline didn’t answer. Zane lunged forward, grabbing her arm. Addie’s eyes met mine, pleading me not to do anything that resulted in getting hurt. I couldn’t watch her get manhandled and not do anything about it. I turned, casting my eyes down to Phoebe. Zane dragged Adeline upstairs. I could hear him talking to Nate, no doubt telling him about Phoebe.

I stared at the body. Hauling a body, even one as little as Phoebe’s wasn’t as easy as it looked in movies. Dead bodies were messy. Everything they were holding inside of them came out. I wrapped Phoebe up in towels and blankets, taking the time to do it gently. I brushed her hair back, feeling a lump of vomit rise in my throat as my fingers touched her cold, stiff skin.

“I’m so sorry,” I whispered to Phoebe. “This was a horrible way to die. It shouldn’t have happened.” I put the blanket over her face. “This stops now. I promise. It’s ending. Soon. Addie and I will run and you will get justice.”

I picked her up, carefully hoisting her body over my shoulder.

“Jackson!” Nate yelled, his voice echoing down the stairs. “If you put one toe over the property line, I will tie your precious Adeline to the bed and make you watch her get fucked over and over.”

I stood at the bottom of the stairs, Phoebe’s body in my arms, and nodded. Nate couldn’t see me, but he knew I wouldn’t risk Adeline. Why was he threatening me now? Were they leaving? And Addie was going with them? Fuck… no. She had to be filling in for Phoebe again.

Yes, we were leaving the first fucking chance we got.

I buried Phoebe in the woods behind the house. She was in an unmarked grave, next to the other girls who had met their horrible fate inside the farmhouse. I went back into the basement with a bucket of bleach water and scrubbed the floor, getting rid of the urine and blood. Addie didn’t need to see it. The empty cot would be bad enough.

I showered, ate, and waited in my room for Nate to return with Adeline. I laid in bed, unable to get Phoebe’s lifeless eyes out of my head. It wasn’t fair what happened to her. None of this should have happened to any of us. I fucking hated it.

The sun had set when Nate’s black Mercedes pulled into the driveway. I sprang up, ready to rush downstairs. But then what? I could look at Addie and not touch her. And risk getting one of us hurt. I went to the top of the stairs listening.

“Don’t fucking touch me,” I heard Addie say. Then the basement door slammed shut. She was back, at least. I retreated into my room, waiting for the others to go to bed. I prayed I wouldn’t get locked in tonight. I closed my door and turned off the light, hoping Nate would assume I was locked away and not come down the hall.

I heard a bottle of champagne pop open and male voices cheering. Oh right, the auction. Nate must have made some decent money. The hooping and hollering grew louder. Okay, he must have made some good money. I shook my head, thinking of the last time I was at an auction. The girls were numbered, dressed in only lingerie and heels. Held at the strip club, buyers sat at tables around the stage, watching as each girl walked out, turning around so her body could be inspected.

I sighed. Once Addie and I got out of here, would the cops be able to  track down all those girls and set them free? Well… that was assuming they were still alive.

Time moved painfully slow as I wanted for Nate, Zane, and Lou to go to bed or pass out. Finally, in the middle of the night, the house grew quiet. And I hadn’t been locked in. I opened my door and listened.

Nothing.

Not thinking twice, I dashed down the hall, not stopping until I was coming down the basement stairs.

“Addie?” I whispered. “Addie, are you awake?” She was sitting on her cot, staring blankly ahead. “How are you holding up?” I asked, slightly afraid she was in shock. I sat next to her and her eyes filled with tears.

I put my hand on her cheek, wiping away her tears with my thumb. She took in a ragged breath and put her hands on my thighs.

“Jackson,” she said, voice breaking.

“It’s okay, Addie,” I said quietly and put my lips to hers in a  gentle kiss.

“Nate had an auction,” she whispered, moving her hands up my thigh and around my waist.

“I know,” I told her. “Zane and the new guy are passed out drunk. They were celebrating how much money they made today.” I held on to her. “Nate has one every few years. He sells the girls who get too old to bring in clients.”

She sucked in a sob and leaned against me. I wrapped her in my arms, resting my head against hers. I ran my hands through her hair. I loved her so much. I hated seeing her like this…it was all I knew, all we knew in the awful place.

“Jackson,” she said again, sitting up. She took a deep breath and looked into my eyes. “Nate sold me today.”

CHAPTER NINETEEN

I shook my head. “No. No. Not you. H-he wouldn’t. Not you. No,” I stammered. I couldn’t believe it. I wouldn’t believe it. Not Addie, not the woman I loved. “It’s too risky. You were kidnapped. People are looking for you. Why would he? No, he wouldn’t. Not you.” I sucked in air, fighting the panic that was rising in my chest.

“Yes. Me,” she said. I looked into her eyes, composing myself for her sake. I held onto her. “The man who bought me is from somewhere in Europe. Nate said it was perfect, and he should have thought of it sooner. No one will know who I am over there. That’s why I haven’t been working. He was just waiting until he could get rid of me.”

“Addie…” I started but had no idea what to say. So I just held her, trying to calm my pounding heart. Addie being sold… it was worse than I ever could have imagined.  “If you leave the country, you will never be found.”

“I know. And I’ll never see you again.”

“Do you know when?” I asked. My arms trembled. I held onto Addie even tighter.

She nodded. “Three months. I’m his son’s fucking graduation present. And I’m staying under lock and key until then. Jackson,” she cried. “I can’t escape with you.” She pushed herself up and looked into my eyes, pleading. “You have to do it. Escape without me. Send help.”

I brought her back to me. She wrapped her legs around my waist and held on to my shoulders. “Adeline,” I said gently. “No. They could still hurt you. Once they realize I’m gone…” I looked away, shaking my head. “They can take you somewhere else or… or ship you out of the country. I promised you that I would do everything I can to keep you safe, and I intend on keeping that promise. You have to be the one to escape.” I ran my hands along her back.

“How can I?” she asked, voice cracking. She put her hand on my cheek and bent her head down so her forehead rested against mine and our noses touched. I kissed her, feeling the sting of tears behind my closed eyes.

“You run,” I whispered. “You were right all along, Addie. If you just run, someone will find you. Run. Just run, and don’t look back. I’ll distract them. Create a diversion long enough for you to get a head start.” I ran my hand through her hair and kissed her once more. “We should do it now while it’s dark. Stay off the road. It’ll be too easy for them to follow you.”

“Distract them?” she asked. “How are you going to distract them from the alarm going off when the ankle bracelet leaves the house? There’s no way unless... no!” she cried. “Jackson, no! I know what you’re thinking.”

“Adeline,” I said in a level voice. My mind was made. We had no other choice. “It’s the only way you’re going to get out of here. I love you. I always knew I would die here. I can’t think of a better reason than to die so you can live.”

“I don’t want you to die here! There has to be another way!”’

“I know how much girls go for at auctions,” I told her grimly. “And I’m guessing Nate put a pretty high price on you. You’re not going to be left alone. Someone will be here, making sure you don’t escape, making sure I don’t try to help you escape. Adeline, please. Please let me do this for you.” My heart was in my throat. My life had been nothing, nothing until I met Adeline. She was the only good thing that ever happened to me, a beautiful flower growing in a field of dead weeds. If saving her meant dying, that was a sacrifice I was willing to make.

We held onto each other, both afraid that if we let go, we’d forever be apart. Adeline lifted her head and kissed me, pressing her lips hard against mine. A jolt of desire went through me and I slid my hands down to her waist. Adeline reached up, gently running her fingers through my hair. I opened my mouth and she pushed her tongue in.

The warmth and the wetness made my nerves tingle, even sensation heightened, arousing me. Addie stopped kissing me only to move her lips to my neck. Desire surged through me, hardening my cock. I wanted Adeline. I wanted to forget everything that was going on and just feel. I wanted to feel myself inside of her, get lost in the ecstasy of lovemaking, and exist together, as one.

She moved her hands from my waist to the bottom of my shirt. My heart beat faster and my erection pressed against the seam in my pants. Addie pulled the shirt up; I lifted my arms so she could take it off. Her eyes lingered over my scar-covered chest. She reached out, tracing the lines of raised scar tissue on my left arm where the bullet had hit. Her chest rapidly rose and fell. I cupped  her face in my hand, brining her to me for another kiss.

She leaned back. I kept a hold on her, kissing her softly as we laid down together, with me positioned in between  her legs while on top of her. I wanted her so badly that my hardness throbbed, the tip wet with precum and begging to be touched. She moved her hands down, fingers overtop of the button of my jeans.

“Are you sure?” I asked her, my voice thin.

“Yes,” she whispered and unzipped my pants, pushing them down. I sat up and pulled them off. As much as I wanted her, wanted this, I wanted her to be ready. I moved back to Adeline, my body humming with want. I licked my lips and looked down at her. She was so beautiful. Slowly, I slipped my hands under her shirt and pulled it up and over her head.

My heart skipped a beat and I grew even harder as I gazed down at her breasts, covered in sheer purple lace. Her nipples were hard, visible through the bra. Keeping my eyes locked with hers, I removed her pants. I kissed her again, with only the thin fabric of our underwear keeping us apart. I was gentle, careful not to move too fast. The love I felt for her was so strong.

Adeline held onto me, pressing her lips against mine, slipping her tongue in and out of my mouth. She widened her legs, urging me onto her until my cock pressed against her core. I moved my mouth to her neck, gently kissing her. She arched her back, letting out a moan.

I moved my hand down, fingers trailing across her stomach. Goosebumps broke out over her skin. I moved my hand down, hesitating when my fingertips brushed the top of her panties. I flicked my eyes to hers. She deeply inhaled and gave me a tiny nod.

Trembling, I pushed my fingers inside her underwear. She was shaved smooth, her skin so supple and soft. I moved my hand lower, feeling her wetness.

And then she panicked.

“Addie!” I said, moving off of her as fast as I could. What the fuck was I thinking? I had moved too fast. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” I blurted. She shook her head, pulling the blanket over herself. “Are you okay? Do you want me to leave?”

“No,” she panted. “Please, no. I’m sorry.” She curled her legs into her body. Why was she apologizing? She had done nothing wrong. I loved Adeline; I never wanted to upset her. She could take all the time she needed; she was more than worth it. “Just…just give me a minute,” she said and closed her eyes. I stayed off the cot, waiting.

After a few minutes, she reached for me. “I want to try again.”

I stood up. “You don’t have to, Addie.”

Her eyes met mine. “I want to.”

My heart skipped a beat. I climbed back into the cot, spooning my body around hers. “We will take it slow, as slow as you need.” I rested my hand on her hip. She tensed, and then relaxed against me.

“I think I’m more scared of the possibility of having a flashback than I am about having sex,” she admitted.

“I know what you mean,” I agreed. For years, I panicked if anyone so much as bumped into my backside.  I hated that Adeline had been through the same thing. “So don’t feel bad if you want to stop, okay?”

She nodded and took my hand, guiding it between her legs. She kept her hand over mine, controlling my movements as I touched her. It was something she hadn’t had: control. And not just over sexual situations. I watched her face, making sure this wasn’t too much. She relaxed even more. I kissed her neck. She pressed my hand harder against her wetness.

“I love you,” I whispered.

Adeline closed her eyes, the tension finally gone from her body. She took her hand off mine and put it on my cheek. “I love you, too,” she whispered back. Then she stuck her hand inside my boxers. Her fingers wrapped around my erection.

Holy fucking shit.

Her hand was warm and her skin was soft, so soft. Slowly, she tightened her grip and slid her hands up my shaft. She paused at the end, and then ran her thumb over the tip of my dick, moving it in a small circle. I inched my fingers up, then stuck them under her panties. She closed her eyes and took a breath, taking her hand off me and resting it on my side. I moved my hand down, over her clit, feeling the slippery wetness from her core. She pulled my face to hers and kissed me.

Slowly, I slid a finger inside of her. She was so warm, so wet. She took in a steady breath and I pulled my finger out then pushed it back in again. I took my time, watching her, trying not to get caught up in how good everything felt. I brought my finger out and pushed two inside her.

She lifted her head, pushing her tongue into my mouth. The tip of my dick glistened with precum, throbbing with desire. I pressed it against her thigh, longing for her to touch me again. We kissed a while longer while I fingered her. Her breathing quickened and she got even wetter.

She let go of my face and grabbed my waist, pulling me between her legs. My cock pressed into her, and I could feel the warmth through my boxers. She tugged at the waistband, pulling them down. She lifted her hips off the cot, allowing me to remove her panties. I moved back, positioning myself over her, my hardness pressing into her.

I paused, waiting for her to be ready. She kissed me then opened her eyes, needing to see me when it happened. She gripped my arms, fingers shaking and let out a steady breath. We locked eyes and she gave me the smallest nod. I pressed my lips to hers and entered her, only going in half way.

But holy fuck it felt fucking good. She took another breath and moved her hands from my arms to my face.  Her tense body relaxed and she kissed me before reaching down, pressing her hands on the back of my thighs. She pulled me to her, pushing me inside of her all the way.

My heart hammered. Slowly I pulled back, and then pushed in. Pull back, and then push in. I couldn’t help but moan in pleasure. Adeline’s hard nipples brushed against my chest as I thrusted back and forth. She kept her hands on my thighs, controlling my speed and the depth of each thrust.

The pleasure was building up. Physically it felt good, fucking fantastic. But there was more to it than that. We were together, sharing something deep, expressing our love for each other. I had never had sex on my own terms before. I never knew it could feel so good.

“Adeline,” I panted, feeling close to coming. “Are you—”

“Yes,” she panted, knowing what I was going to ask. “I… I am.” Her legs tightened around me and her nails pressed into my skin. I wanted to come. And I could, but I wanted Adeline to finish first. She pressed her lips to my neck and arched her back. I thrusted faster. I closed my eyes. I was so fucking close. I was going to come any second. My fingers curled into the mattress. My breath whooshed in and out of me. Not yet. Fuck. I wanted to come right now.

Addie’s muscles contracted as an orgasm rippled through her. Her head tossed back and she let out a moan. I let go, feeling intense pleasure and relief as I climaxed, coming inside of her. My cock pulsed, sending waves of pleasure through me.

I lowered myself on her, pressing my lips to her neck. She looked at me, smiling.

“I wasn’t sure if I would ever enjoy sex again,” she panted.

“Did you enjoy that?” I asked, fearful she might say no.

“Yes, I did. Did you?”

“Yes,” I told her. “I’d never…” I trailed off, feeling embarrassed. I pressed my head to her shoulder and pulled out, feeling warm semen spill down her leg and onto the cot. I rolled over, pulling her to me. “That way my…” I shook my head.

“What is it, Jackson?” she whispered as she gently pressed her lips to mine. I had to tell her now.

“I’d never done it before without being forced,” I blurted.

“Oh,” she said, tracing her fingers up and down my arm. Did that upset her? Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. No, I was glad she knew.

“I’m glad it was with you.”

CHAPTER TWENTY

I put the Blazer in park, waiting outside a large brick house. I nervously looked around, feeling very out of place. Nate had paid off the guard at the front of the gated neighborhood. He wouldn’t say anything, but anyone else could. I swallowed hard and looked in the rearview mirror. I supposed the fact that a bachelor party was going on could be a good enough cover.

Nate’s words echoed through my mind. Attract any unwanted attention to yourself and I’ll tie Adeline up and make you fuck her while I watch. I closed my eyes, shaking my head. I wasn’t going to allow that to happen. Not after last night, after Adeline and I made love. It was so much more than sex. It was taking something back, something that had been stolen from us by paying customers. We were intimate together on our own terms. Nate wasn’t going to take that away.

The front door to the large house opened. Lily stepped out, squinting in the early morning light. She carried her heels in her hand and padded barefoot to the SUV. My stomach twisted. I had to tell her about Phoebe.

“Hey Jackson,” she said, rubbing sleep from her eyes. I waited until she and Rochelle were in the car to break the news. Lily cried the entire way home, blaming Rochelle for Phoebe’s death. Rochelle had asked Zane before to bring medicine for the girls. I guess she hadn’t this time around.

I had a knot in my stomach the entire ride back to the farmhouse. I remembered all  too well the way Phoebe’s stiff body felt in my arms, the way her bones creaked and cracked when I laid her down in the shallow grave. Though she hadn’t been dead long, the smell of death emanated from her, lingering on my clothes for longer than I could stand. Her skin was cold, stiff, yet felt disconnected from her body. It moved loosely over her muscles.

Her dark eyes lost color and her cheeks sunk in. Her mouth hung open and wouldn’t close, even when I tried pushing it shut. Her hair stuck to her face, crusted with blood that dripped from her ear. A large bruise covered her forehead; she must have fallen face first onto the ground before she died.

I shuddered and pushed the thought away, concentrating on the road. My thoughts drifted to Adeline and the way it felt to be inside of her. I missed her lips against mine, the feel of her heart pounding in her chest as she held onto me like I was the only thing that mattered. I missed her. And I hated that I would go back to the farmhouse, the same house she was in, and be so far away.

“She can’t leave!” Lily cried, blinking back tears. Ridiculously long false lashes came together.

“Well, she is,” Rochelle said and reached inside her shirt. She pulled her breasts up, making them look even larger. “And don’t cry. You’re going to mess up your makeup.”

Lily bit her lip and looked out the window. It was after sunset, and I was dropping the girls off to work the street.

“But to Europe?” Lily said. “I’ll never see her again.”

Rochelle flipped her hair over her shoulder. “It’s not like she’s your friend or anything.”

Lily’s young face darkened. “Yes she is! This is bullshit!” She took her hand off the car door. “I hate this. I fucking hate this.”

I watched her in the rearview, heart pounding. As much as I wanted Lily to protest, to run and scream…now wasn’t the time. Jose, a Mexican man who worked for Nate and spoke very little English, was parked in a car just a few yards from us. He watched over the girls as they walked up and down the street, making sure everyone paid and in turn, that the girls turned in their money.

“Lily,” Rochelle said in a calm voice. She put her hand on Lily’s arm. “We’ll talk about it later. What matters now is working tonight. We have a job to do,” she said, as if whoring herself out for a few hundred bucks contributed to society in a meaningful way.

Lily’s face softened. She nodded and got out of the car.

“See you later,” she said to me, earning a scowl from Rochelle. I rolled my eyes, then panicked that Rochelle had seen me. I fired up the engine, mind turning as I drove back. I hadn’t gotten a chance to sit down and talk to Adeline since last night.

No matter what, she wasn’t going to leave the country. I wasn’t going to allow it. How I would stop it…I had yet to sort out. I’d find a way. Somehow.

I thought about it the entire drive home, going over every scenario in my head. Just when I  thought of something that would work, Nate made his way into my mind, reminding me that he had people everywhere. It was hard to get away.

Nate was sitting in the living room, reading the newspaper when I came in through the open door. He sipped his coffee and looked up, flicking his eyes from me to the kitchen. I sighed. I knew he wanted dinner made. At least he’d leave me alone, giving me more time to think.

I had just cleaned the kitchen after Nate, Zane, and Lou finished eating when Nate’s phone rang. He pulled it from his back pocket and stared at the number. A vein on his forehead became visible. Oh fuck.

I ducked into the mudroom, listening from a distance.

“Yes, this is he,” Nate said calmly. “Yes, she is my step-niece.”

Nate had a large false family. I held my breath and waited.

“Right. I understand this is the fifth time and—” he cut off, listening to whoever was on the other end.

“Who is it?” Zane whispered. “Who is it?” He leaned over the table, demanding to know what was going on. Nate waved his hand at Zane and stood, turning his back on him.

“Rochelle,” Nate said into the phone. “What the fuck did you do?” He paused, listening to Rochelle. “You know fucking well what to look for,” he said, temper growing with each word. “Now look what you’ve done. You fucked up and are in jail! Now I have to come and bail you out and come up with a cover story for you. Again!”

He slammed the phone down. “Come  on,” he growled at Zane. “Lou, stay here and make sure Jackson doesn’t mess with my investment.”

My heart raced. This won’t the first time Rochelle had gotten arrested. Sooner or later, someone would catch on. I couldn’t fucking wait.

Nate and Zane left the house in a hurry. Lou rummaged around for more food then went upstairs into Zane’s room, shutting the door behind him. I snuck up behind him, wondering what he was doing.

Then I heard the cheesy music and the over the top moaning. Oh. He was watching porn. I wondered if it was porn that had been bought, or made with Nate’s girls. I shook my head. I didn’t want to know. I flew back down the stairs, looking at the front door. I didn’t know the codes to get out. It didn’t matter. It was now or never.

I flew down the stairs. She’d have to act fast then run, run even faster. I debated which I should do first; break the window or cut the ankle bracelet. I looked at the large windows in the breakfast nook. I envisioned it, imagining everything running smoothly.

Cut the bracelet. Break the window. Help Addie get through the broken glass. Then distract Lou.

I nodded to myself. Yes. This was going to work. Addie would get to the road, she’d find help. She’d be free.

I hurried to the basement door, biting my lip. Was it selfish to want one more time with her? No… it was all I had. I opened the basement door.

“Addie,” I called down the stairs. “It’s me. Come here.”

I heard her scuffle around before she dashed up the stairs, smiling as soon as she saw me. I grabbed her hand and pulled her to me, closing the door as quietly as I could. I moved in, closing my arms around her. I put my mouth to hers, my tongue opening her lips. I pressed her against the door, feeling every inch of her body against mine.

This would be the last time I ever kissed her like this. Everything else faded away. It  was only her, her lips against mine, her heart beating fast in her chest in rhythm with mine, her hands settled on my waist. It was only us, and we were all that mattered.

“Hello to you, too,” she breathed when we broke apart.

I ran my hands down her arms and into her hands. “Rochelle got arrested,” I said.

“Are you serious?” Her eyebrows went up and her eyes widened.

I nodded. “Yeah. For prostitution. Nate just left. The new guy is still here, though. He’s in Zane’s room. I think he’s watching porn.” We crept through the living room. Moonlight spilled through the windows, promising freedom. I closed my eyes in a long blink. Soon, Addie would be free. Until then, she would be with me.

We hurried into my room and I closed the door.

“What’s going to happen to Rochelle?” she asked and looked around the room.

“She’ll get released,” I said with a shrug. “Eventually. This isn’t the first time she’s been arrested, either.” I pulled the covers back on my bed, straightening the pillows.  “I don’t know how the legalities of it work. She’s usually home the next morning. I think Nate might pay someone off.”

Addie got in bed, sticking her feet under the covers. I tried not to stare at the ankle bracelet. “When will they come home?” she asked.

“A few hours at least. Nate does the talking but I know Zane is there, waiting in the parking lot. He won’t leave until she’s out,” I said.

“What’s up with them? Does Zane love her or something?”

“He has some sort of obsession with her, which isn’t love. He loves the way she loves him, if that makes sense. He can get her to do anything. She’ll fawn and fight over him just for a minute of his attention,” I explained.

“What a creep.” She grabbed her elbows, pressing her arms into her torso. She looked around the room again, taking everything in. Other than the bed, my books, and the dresser, the room was empty. Her eyes settled on the box of books and she got up, kneeling down next to them. “You have an interesting variety,” she said, picking up an anatomy and physiology textbook.

I shrugged, feeling a little embarrassed. “Since I didn’t get to finish high school, I like to read whatever I can.”

“You don’t seem—” she started then stopped.

“Dumb?” I supplied with a half smile

“That wasn’t what I was going to say,” she said. “But no, you don’t.” She flipped through another textbook. I liked learning. Besides ruining my life, stealing my childhood, and being a narcissistic psychopath, I hated Nate the most for not allowing me to get an education.  “I’m surprised you’re allowed to have books,” she said.

“I was too,” I greed. “Nate says it keeps me quiet. I want something new. But I shouldn’t complain, right? I’m happy I at least have those, even though I’ve had exactly those for the last five years.”

“You’re too good,” she said and sat next to me in the bed. I wrapped my arms around her, bringing her in so she was lying on top of me.  “How will we know when Nate and Zane come back?” she asked. I could feel her pulse rise at the thought.

“I cracked the window,” I said. “We’ll hear the car coming down the driveway.”

“And Lou?”

“He hasn’t bothered me… yet. I don’t think he will come in unless he hears us, but given that I can literally hear the ass-smacking from whatever shitty film he’s watching, I don’t think will be a problem.”

“Good.” She draped her leg over mine. I kissed her forehead and ran my fingertips down her back.

“I love you,” I whispered.

“I love you too.” She closed her eyes and rested her head against me. I moved my hands to her hips, flipping us over so I was on top, between her legs. Blood rushed to my cock. I brushed hair out of her face and then kissed her. She ran her hands through my hair, sending tingles throughout me.

I looked into her green eyes, knowing that this was the right thing to do. She was worth it. I had felt more alive in the last few weeks with her than I had in my entire life.

“I’ve been a slave for over ten years, and I’d be a slave for ten more just to spend one more day with you,” I said quietly.

Her green eyes clouded with worry. “Why does that sound like a goodbye?”

It was a goodbye. There was no way around that. I couldn’t bring myself to tell her, not yet. Instead, I lowered my head and passionately kissed her. She put her hands under my shirt, skin warm against me. I moved my mouth to her neck, gently sucking at her skin. My semi-erection hardened all the way.

“Are you sure?” I asked her, lips brushing her neck as I spoke.

“Yes,” she said, voice breathy and arched her hips, pushing her pelvis into me. “You don’t have to ask me anymore.”

“Are you—” I started then cut off with a smile. I spent a few more minutes kissing her, enjoying the way she felt, tasted. I drank her in, never wanting to get out of this bed. If only things could stay like this…

I stuck my hands under her shirt, pushing them over her stomach. She moaned when my fingers circled her hard nipples. She bit her bottom lip and closed her eyes. She had one hand on the mattress, twisting the sheets under her fingers, and the other was on my arm. She moved her fingers over the scar from the bullet, over and over.

“Sorry,” she said when she pressed too hard and I flinched.

“It’s okay,” I told her, shyly pulling her shirt off.

“It’s how I know it’s you,” she whispered and lifted her arms up. I pulled the shirt over her head and took her hand, putting it back over the scar. “This way I can close my eyes.”

“There are a lot of scars to feel,” I whispered.

“I hate that there is,” she said, moving her hands down over a lumpy patch of scar tissue on my side.

“They remind me of Nate and Zane. I hate them,” I blurted.

“Me too,” she said and brought her hands to my face. “But the scars remind me that you were stronger than whatever they did to hurt you.”

She pulled me down to her and kissed me as she took off my shirt and then my pants and boxers. She lifted her hips, allowing me to yank her pajama pants off. I moved back over her. She was still wearing her panties, but I could feel the warm wetness though the thin material. I rubbed myself against her, gently cupping her breast in my hand. It was perky yet soft and the perfect size to fit right in my grasp. She trailed her fingers up and down my back.

I pressed the tip of my dick against her clit, rubbing it through her panties. She slowly inhaled, head turning to the side and muscles tightening. She pulled me to her and nodded. I reached down, pushing her underwear to her knees. She kicked it off.

Then the floor creaked from the hall. We both froze, too scared to move. I looked up, staring at the door. The toilet flushed and I took a deep breath, slowly letting it out. Adeline’s hands were shaking. She held onto me, steadying herself.

We took a moment to start again. The fear killed the mood, but one look at Addie turned me on again. She curled her legs up. I pressed my cock against her, going slow. Her fingers found a scar on the back of my neck. She gently felt it as I entered her.

It felt just as good as last night. Maybe better. I wasn’t as nervous and Adeline was more relaxed. I melted into her, rocking my hips as I slid my cock in and out. She was so wet…wet and warm. She squeezed her thighs, mouth opening. She moaned, and then pressed her lips together, not wanting to be heard.I nuzzled her neck, sucking at her skin, harder this time. I pushed my cock in deeper as I sucked.

Pleasure rippled through her and she moaned again. Her eyes opened and flicked to the door. The unspoken fear of getting caught loomed over us. I tried not to think about it. I concentrated on Adeline, how good it felt to be inside of her, how much I loved her.

I thrusted faster. Adeline opened her mouth and pulled me tighter. Her nails pressed into me and she turned her head to the side, ready to climax. I was close to coming as well.

Then the bed frame creaked. I stopped moving. Adeline put her hands on my shoulders.

“Do you want to finish?” she asked, and then looked embarrassed.

“If you do.”

“Yes,” she said, nodding. There was something desperate in her eyes telling me she was so close too. She moved her hands to my face, kissing me as we started again. Her fingers tangled in my hair and she bent her legs around me. She pulled my hair and sharply inhaled.

Oh fuck, I needed to come. I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I lost all willpower and pushed myself in deeper. Not…yet…I pulled back and Addie’s fingers tightened, yanking my hair. I lost it, my breath coming out in a huff. That was it; I was desperate to come.

Then Adeline threw her head back, back arching. She gripped onto me, pressing her mouth against my skin to muffle her moan as she climaxed. Not a second later I came. Hard. She clung on to me as I finished, panting.

My dick was still throbbing with pleasure. I waited until it stopped then slid out of her, not caring if we made a mess on the bed. We resituated with her on top of me, staying like that only for a minute before getting dressed.

“Why did you say ‘one more day?''” Adeline asked, tracing the outline of my body with her finger.

“I was hoping you’d forget,” I said.

“Not a chance.”

I took a breath, preparing for what I was about to say. “Nate and Zane are gone. This is as good a time as any for you to escape.”

She straightened up, looking right into my eyes. “And you too, right?”

I frowned, heart sinking. I didn’t want to upset her. “I don’t know the codes right now. You’ll have to go through a window.”

“So?” she asked, starting to get scared. “You can come with me. Windows are quiet anyway. By the time I get out and the alarm goes off, we can be long gone.”

“As soon as I unlock a window on the first floor, the alarm will go off. The only windows I have access to up here are straight drops. You could fall and hurt yourself, and then you wouldn't be able to run. And you’re forgetting that the ankle bracelet has a GPS tracker. Lou can go after you and find you. I have to distract him.”

“Jackson, no. Please!” Her eyes filled with tears. She shook her head, pleading. “No. I can’t leave you. I won’t leave you.”

“You can send help.”

“We both know that’s a load of shit,” she said, blinking back tears. “You’ll be dead by then.”

“Adeline,” I whispered, reaching out to caress her face. “That’s why I brought you up here. I wanted one more time with you. You’ve given me so much, more than I deserve. Now it’s my turn to give you a chance. You can have your life back, start over. You don’t need me.”

“I don’t want to start over without you.” Tears rolled down her face. “I need you. I need your arms around me, holding me, keeping me together. I need your lips to press against mine, to hear your heart beating, to feel the heat of your skin. I need you.”

“You’ll find somebody else, someone who can give you a better life than I could.”

“Stop it! I don’t want anyone else,” she cried. “I want you! I love you, Jackson. No one else.”

“And I love you, Adeline. Enough to sacrifice myself for you. Please, Addie. Let me do this for you. Take this chance. My death will set you free.”

She pushed my hand away. “No. Do not tell me goodbye. It didn’t work last time, and it won’t work now. There has to be another way. There has to be. I won’t let you leave me.”

“If there is, I can’t think of it. Adeline, listen to me. You have to get out. You have to get help. You might not save me, but you’ll save so many others. Just think of all the girls Nate has now and all the girls he’ll have in the future. He has to be stopped.” I pushed her hair over her shoulder.

“You’re right,” she agreed, eyes filled with tears. Her bottom lip quivered and her eyebrows pushed together. Then her face relaxed. “Jackson!” she cried and grabbed my arm. “You’ll pick up Rochelle and Lily again, right?”

“I’m sure I will someday, why?”

“That’s our key. That’s how we will both get out.”

“What are you getting at?”

“The next time you go out, get pulled over, steal from a gas station, I don’t know, just get police attention.”

“No, Addie, they will hurt—”

“No they won’t,” she interrupted. “Not severely at least. I’m too important to Nate right now. Monetarily that is.”

Holy shit. She was right. I looked at her, smiling. “I think you’re right!” I nodded. “You are right. Nate won’t let anything too bad happen to you. Still, there’s a risk to you.”

“It’s more than worth it, Jackson. If it gets us both out of here, a little pain is more than fine.”

I didn’t want to see Adeline in any pain, ever again. Though, she was right. “I’d rather see you in a small amount of pain than see you shipped off to the other side of the world. There is a cop parked at a gas station on the way to the truck stop. He’s there almost every Saturday night. I’ll speed past. In a matter of days, we will be free.” I enveloped her in my arms, giving her a big kiss. “You’re a genius.”

“I don’t know about that,” she said, hugging me back. “Are we really doing this?”

“Yes,” I said.

“As much as I want to leave I’m scared,” she confessed. I was scared too. I used to dream about leaving, and then I gave up. Now I was more than ready to leave again…but this was all I knew. It didn’t matter. We’d be together. We’d make it work somehow.

“It’ll work out,” I promised and laid back against the pillows. Adeline yawned. “Get some sleep, Addie. I’ll listen for the car.”

“Okay,” she said, eyes heavy. She nestled into my arms and fell asleep in just minutes.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

I paced around my room. I had been locked in all day. My stomach grumbled and hunger pains were setting in. I was used to being locked in my room. So used to it that I liked it since it meant I was left alone.

But right now…now I was anxious to get out, get the girls, and send help. Freedom was so close and Adeline’s departure to Europe was getting closer and closer. I paced around the room wishing I had a clock to obsessively check, not that it would do any good.

The Camaro roared to life. I went to the window, watching it peel out of the driveway. I narrowed my eyes. It was hard to see through the tinted window, but I was sure there was someone in the back seat.

Yes.

If Lily or Rochelle were working tonight, I’d go get them. My stomach fluttered and nerves prickled down my spine. We could be free tonight.

I sat on the bed, bouncing my leg up and down. Nate was still in the house; I could hear him on the phone. I laid down and closed my eyes. I was tired. I hadn’t been able to sleep well since the night Adeline told me she had been sold.

I drifted to sleep and dreamed that Adeline and I escaped. We were together, and happy, just spending time reading and enjoying each other’s company. I woke up feeling almost happy. I rolled over, trying to hold onto the feelings.

What would Addie’s family think? The thought of meeting them made me sweat. The thought of meeting anyone and having to tell them what we’d been through wasn’t something I wanted to do. I had memories, horrible memories stored away. I didn’t know what would happen if I brought them to the surface.

I shivered. Eventually, we’d have to. If we got out. I shook my head. When we got out. Nate and Zane and everyone else working for them would be on trial. And we’d have to testify.

A metallic click came from outside my door. I snapped my head up. Nate threw the door open but stayed in the hall. His blonde hair was smooth and styled. Cold blue eyes darted around the room before settling on me.

“Get your stuff,” he said.

“What?” I asked.

Nate’s eyes drilled into me. “Are you deaf all of the sudden? Get your stuff.”

I stood, blinking the sleep out of my eyes. “Why?”

“Do not question me, Jackson,” he said, spitting my name out like it was trash. “I want this room emptied out. Then take the boxes from the hall and put them in here. Do not open them or touch anything.” He turned. “You have five minutes.”

I watched him leave, wondering what it was all about. I swallowed my nerves and pulled what little I had out of the drawers of the dresser. I set it in the box of books and went into the bathroom. I had two towels, a few washrags, shampoo, and soap. I folded the quilt and took my pillow. I piled it in the box and slid the thing into the hall.

There were five large cardboard boxes and two suitcases in the hall. I was curious, but didn’t dare peel back the tape on the boxes. I hurriedly put them in my room, and then ducked into the hall.

Nate was on the phone again, his voice echoing up the stairs. I went back into my room and cracked open a suitcase.

“Oh,” I said, realizing it belonged to Lou. Why was he moving in? I shook my head. It didn’t really matter. My guess was that Nate was moving to a newer, even bigger house and leaving Zane in charge here. Adeline was leaving after all…or so he thought.

Nate hadn’t given me any further instruction other than to move the stuff. So I went back into my room and sat on the bed. Ten more minutes passed before Nate yelled for me, demanding I come downstairs with my box of things.

“Do you not know how to tell time?” he asked calmly as I walked down the stairs. The box wasn’t particularly heavy, but it was weak. I struggled to keep the bottom from falling out.

“I don’t have a clock,” I retorted without thinking. The room got colder.

“I said you had five minutes,” Nate said slowly. “You were up there for over fifteen.”

I crossed the living room, still unsure of what Nate wanted me to do. I set the box on the dining room table. “You didn’t say what to do after five minutes,” I said, shaking my head. “My stuff is out; the other stuff is in,” I said and flicked my eyes to Nate. “Where am I going?”

“ Wherever I tell you,” Nate said.

I arched my eyebrows. “And that is…?”

Nate narrowed his eyes. “What’s gotten into you, Jackson?” He crossed his arms and looked at me curiously. “You have an attitude. I don’t like it.”

I stared at Nate, imagining myself going after him. Now would be an ideal time. Zane and Lou were gone. Nate was alone; I could take him. I forced myself to look away. It wasn’t worth it, in case I couldn’t take him. It wasn’t worth the risk.

I turned my back, walking into the kitchen.

“I asked you a question,” Nate stated.

My fingers curled into fists. I slowly turned around.

“This attitude. Where is it coming from?” Nate crossed his arms. His face was set but I could see the fear in his eyes.

I shrugged. “Maybe from the twelve years you’ve held me captive.”

Nate’s nostrils flared. “You better watch it, Jackson. You’re only here because you are useful.”

I took a breath. Nate was right; I did have a different attitude. Making love to Adeline had rattled me in the best way possible. I got a taste of freedom and I’d be damned to let Nate stand in my way.

“You’re getting careless,” he continued. “Or maybe not.” He smirked and shook his head. “Maybe you dropped the girls off next to that undercover cop on purpose.”

My heart skipped a beat in fear out of habit. I wanted to back away and cower in the corner and pray for the pain to end. I took another breath. I was done bowing down to Nate. I couldn’t go after him physically, but I could show my extreme distaste, right?

“I didn’t do it on purpose. But if I had known there were undercover cops on that street, I would have dropped the girls off next to them a long time ago.” I turned to pick up my box of stuff. “I’m assuming I’m moving into the basement again, right?” I was secretly happy about it. Addie was down there…

“That’s enough,” Nate said sternly.

I whipped around. “Is it?

Nate took a quick step back. Was he scared of me? I jerked forward. He backed away again. Fuck, that felt good. I had never been on the other end, the one in control. Without thinking, I took a swing at Nate. My first collided with his face. He staggered back, hands going to his face.

I stood there, rooted in the spot with wide eyes. Holy shit. Had I really just done that? I looked at my knuckles. Then Nate lunged forward.

A jolt of electricity shot through me. Nate pressed the Taser into my neck. My arms flopped to my sides and my mouth opened, eyes rolling back. Then I fell to the floor.

I woke up with my hands tied behind my back, painfully laying on them. Nate sat at the island counter in the kitchen, calmly drinking a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. My left eye hurt and it was a struggle to open it all the way. Fuck. He must have hit me while I was out.

Fucking coward, hitting me while I was down. I tasted blood. Carefully, I ran my tongue over my lips. Yep, I had been hit more than once. I groaned when I tried to sit up.

“Ah, good. You’re awake,” Nate said and took another drink of coffee. He set the mug down and folded the paper, smoothing out the wrinkles. He stood and rolled up his sleeves. “You need a reminder of where you stand.”

I closed my eyes. What the fuck had I done? Why did I have to mouth off to Nate? It didn’t accomplish anything. Nate stepped over me and went to the counter. All cutlery was kept in a locked cabinet, only allowed out when I was using it to cook. He unlocked that door and pulled out a knife.

“I was thinking, what’s one more scar?” He shrugged and came back, standing over me. “You’ve already got so many reminders permanently on your body. You’d think you’d know.” His eye narrowed and he sighed. “You’re a disappointment. After all these years, you still got something left inside of you.” He rubbed his brow and shook his head. “Maybe this will be a big enough reminder.”

He knelt down and pressed the knife against me. My heart raced and I tried to flinch away. Nate sat on my legs and I couldn’t move. The knife was at the bottom of my rib cage. Oh fuck! If he pushed hard enough, it would pop through my skin, tear past the muscle and puncture my lung.

“I’d hold still if I were you,” Nate said, a twisted smile pulling up his lips. With wide eyes I stared at the blade. With no warning, Nate pushed it into my skin. I cried out, lifting my head to see blood soaking through my shirt. He twisted the knife a few times then stopped, dragging the knife diagonally down, not stopping until he got to my hip.

Pain radiated across my abdomen. Nate pressed the flat side of the knife against my cheek, wiping the blood off on my skin. He threw the knife in the sink.

“All you are good for is cooking and cleaning. Things better be spotless around here or I won’t need you anymore.”

Despite the pain, his words hit me. Cooking and cleaning? What about running errands or picking up the girls? “I… I… go places for you,” I rushed out.

Nate scoffed. “Like I trust you right now.” He crossed his arms. “Do you think I’m stupid, Jackson?”

No, I didn’t, not at all. Nate was a smart man. Very smart. That was part of what made him so dangerous.

“Lou is replacing you. Now get downstairs,” he said. “You’re bleeding on my floor.”

Reeling with pain, I struggled to turn over and get to my feet with my hands still bound behind my back. I was scared to look down at myself. The fact that my intestines didn’t fall out on the floor was reassuring. I blinked several times, feeling very dizzy and forced my eyes down.

Blood stained my white t-shirt. I was bleeding, but the blood wasn’t gushing. And I had gotten to my feet. The damage was mostly cosmetic… I hoped. Nate opened the basement door.

“My stuff,” I panted. Nate huffed but untied my hands. He picked up the box and shoved it against me. I winced and almost threw up from the pain. Afraid of passing out, I held onto the railing and plodded down the stairs. Nate slammed the door behind me.

Lily was sitting at the card table, absent-mindedly shuffling a  worn deck of cards. She looked up and gave me a small smile. Then she blinked, green eyes widening when she realized I wasn’t carrying a tray of food.

“Shit!” she swore and jumped up. “What the hell happened?”

I somehow made my way over, setting the box down on the table. I doubled over, catching myself. “Nate cut me,” I said.

“Yeah, I can like see that,” she said, shaking her head. “Rochelle!” she cried, unable to look away. Her hands flew to her face. “Oh my god, Rochelle. Wake up! You’re going to bleed to death. Fuck, I don’t know what to do!”

“I’m okay,” I told her.

“No you’re fucking not!”

“I will be.” I lifted my head to look into her eyes. She was about to cry and her arms were shaking.

“No… no… I don’t think so.” She sharply inhaled. “Rochelle!” she screamed and turned again. Then she rushed forward, taking my arm and leading me to a cot. “What…what happened?” she stammered.

I sank onto the cot and pressed my hands to my shirt. The entire front was wet. Oh. Maybe Lily was right.

“What is all the noise?” Rochelle asked and sat up. She squinted in the dim light. “Jackson?”

“Yeah,” I said and was hit with a wave of dizziness.

“Why are you here?”

Lily shot her a look. “He’s going to bleed to death.”

Rochelle sat up. “What? No.”

“Yeah. Come over here and help me!” She knelt down, reaching forward. Her head moved back and forth and she bit her lip. “This is bad, Jackson.”

“Nah, it’s just a flesh wound,” I tried to convince both of us.

“You’re bleeding!”

Rochelle made her way over. “You’ve already established that. It can’t be—fuck.” Her dark eyes widened. She swallowed hard and shuddered. “I don’t do blood,” she said and turned away.

“Rochelle!” Lily screamed and put her hands on my stomach. I winced and Lily jumped. “What do we do?”

Rochelle put her hands over her face. “Apply pressure?” She nodded. “Yes. Pressure. It’ll stop the bleeding.”

I moved my hands down, trying to cover the cut. Fuck. It was too big. Lily wiped her hand on her shirt then put them over mine. Her eyes filled with tears.

“I can’t lose you too,” she whispered. “Not after Pheebs… and now Addie.”

“I’m going to be okay,” I promised.

“I don’t think so,” she said. Her eyes closed and she rocked back. “I’m like so dizzy.”

“Lay down,” I said. “Before you pass out.” I looked over my shoulder at Rochelle. “A little help?”

She shook her head so quickly it looked like a nervous tick. Her jaw was clamped shut and the color had drained from her face. She shook herself and stood, holding her arms close to her body.

Lily inhaled. “I’m okay. I think. Just like terrified out of my fucking mind.” She pushed herself up right as the basement door opened. Lily turned. She was standing in front of me; I couldn’t see who came down the stairs.

“Addie,” she said.

“Thank God,” Rochelle said. “I can’t get the bleeding to stop,” she mumbled, though it wasn’t like she even tried. Lily stood, turning to Addie.

“He’s going to bleed out,” she said, her voice thin.

“Who?” Addie asked, though I was sure she knew. Lily stepped aside. Adeline’s face fell and all color drained from her cheeks.

“Hey Addie,” I said, trying not to show any pain. “It’s not as bad as it looks.” I looked into her eyes and everything was okay. She ran over, dropping to her knees. I took in a shaky breath, feeling dizzy again. She put her hands over mine.

“What happened?” she asked quietly, like she was struggling for air. Her fingers trembled and she leaned in close. I closed my eyes for a second. I should tell her to move away, to stop acting like she cared this much.

“I pissed off Nate,” I said through gritted teeth.

“So he stabbed you?” she asked.

I slid my bloody hands over hers, linking our fingers. “Not exactly. Sliced.”

“What?” she cried. Her bottom lip trembled as she pulled my hands away to see the wound. “Oh God.” Her eyes filled with tears. “How deep?”

“Not very,” I told her. “Barely got the muscle. I think.”

“Think?” She looked up at me, blinking back her tears.

“I can still move. So it can’t be that bad.” I hoped I was right.

“Right,” she said, unable to hold her tears back any longer. “Lay back,” she said to me then turned her head. “Lily, bring a towel.”

Lying down and stretching my skin hurt. I winced and closed my eyes, trying not to show pain. I didn’t want Addie to worry any more than she had to.

“Hurry!” she said to Lily.

“It’s okay, Addie. I’ve had worse and lived,” I quietly reminded her.

“You’re not helping,” she said.

“It’s true.” And I never had her before to take care of me. I was in a great deal of pain, but I knew I’d be fine. Addie pulled my shirt up and put her hands on the wound, pushing the torn skin together.

“Will this work?” Lily asked, holding up a washcloth.

“Good enough,” Addie said, taking it from her. She folded it in half and laid it over the wound, pushing down with her hand.

“How long 'till it stops bleeding?” Lily asked, shifting her weight from foot to foot. “I’ve never seen this much blood before. I didn’t know it had a smell to it. It smells like pennies,” she rambled.

“I don’t know,” Addie answered. “Soon, I hope.” I started to sit up. I could hold the towel over my own stomach. “No. Do not move. You’re going to make it bleed more. No moving until it stops,” she said.

I let out a breath but laid back down. Not moving was a good idea since even the slightest movement hurt. Addie’s head tipped down and tears rolled down her cheeks, splattering on the mattress. I lifted my hand to caress her cheek. Blood smeared across her skin. She looked at me and my heart broke for her. She was so dejected, so hopeless in that moment. She closed her eyes and leaned in, taking comfort for a few seconds before she focused on the wound again.

“What can I do?” Lily asked.

“Is there any rubbing alcohol left?” Addie asked her.

“Maybe. I’ll check.”

“Okay. Bring it.”

“Sorry, Jackson, that’s going to hurt,” Lily mumbled.

She was right. But I knew it was necessary. “It’ll be fine.”

“Liar,” Addie teased with a small smile.

“It’s going to be okay,” I said quietly so only she heard me. “I promise you, Addie.”

“I hope so,” she whispered back.

I put my hand over hers, applying more pressure to the cut. She moved her other hand up, gently inspecting the cuts and bruises on my face.

“What happened?” she asked and wiped away crusted blood. I didn’t realize my face was so banged up.

“Got into it with Nate. I didn’t realize he had a Taser on him. He hits me in the back, and the next thing I know, I’m on the floor being tied up.” I weakly smiled. “I got him, though. Before he tased me. Punched him right in the jaw. He’ll have a nice bruise in the morning.”

“Good,” Addie whispered and folded the rag over to the clean side.  “But why are you down here?”

“Nate likes Lou and wants him to stay. He’ll take over what I did when it comes to the girls. And Zane won’t share a room.”

“Oh, so they kicked you out of your room and back down here?” She looked into my eyes, feeling the same painful desire. We were so close, literally touching, and it wasn’t enough. She was right in front of me and I missed her.

“Yes,” I told her, heart sinking. “All my stuff is over there.” I pointed to the table.

“At least we’re down here together,” she said with a small smile. Then it hit her. We were together… but our chance at freedom was gone. I wouldn’t be going out to pick up the  girls anymore. I wouldn’t be able to signal someone and send help.

“We’ll figure it out,” I whispered.

Addie didn’t respond for several seconds. Then she blinked and shook her head. “Yeah. We will.”

Lily held up a bottle. “Found it!”

“Good. Can you bring it and another towel over?” Addie asked her.

“There’s nothing clean,” Lily answered. “What about this?” She grabbed a towel that was hanging to dry.

“Good enough,” Addie answered. “Right?”

I nodded. “I think so. Better than nothing.”

Addie got up and rinsed the washcloth out in the shower. She gently pressed it to my face, blotting up blood that dripped down my ear. She pushed my hair out of my face. I could see Rochelle sitting on her cot watching us. Still stricken from the sight of blood, she wasn’t picking up on the intimacy of Adeline’s touch.

“Would it be easier to just take a shower?” I asked Addie when she started cleaning the blood on my stomach.

“I don’t know,” she said. “I think the sooner this clots the better. And showering will soften any fresh scab, right? Maybe you should wait a day or two to shower at all.”

I shrugged. I usually showered after I got the shit beat out of me. I hated being covered in blood.  “Okay,” I said. “I can help you.”

“Jackson, just rest. I want you to get better.”

“I got blood all over your bed.”

“I don’t care about that,” she said. “I just want you to be okay.” Her voice broke and she started crying.

Lily scuttled over. “Is he dying?” she asked, face pale.

“No,” I told her. “I’m going to be fine.”

Rochelle slowly shook her head. “You don’t look fine.”

I closed my eyes, too tired to argue. Adeline unscrewed the cap to the rubbing alcohol and poured some on the towel. She started with the small cuts on my face and worked her way down. The alcohol stung. “Ready?” she asked when she got to my stomach.

“Yeah,” I told her and pressed my fingers into the mattress. She poured more alcohol onto the towel then gently pressed it to my skin, started at the top of the cut on the left side. I reminded myself the burn was good, that it meant the wound was being cleaned, but damn, that hurt.

“Okay,” Addie said when she was done. “You need to rest.”

I nodded, wishing she could lay down with me. She got up, wiping her hands on the towel. She wadded it up and threw it in the shower, then washed her hands and went to the card table. She helped me take my shirt off.

“Just throw it away,” I said, knowing it was ripped and stained. She nodded and folded it in her hands.

“You’re still bleeding,” she said, eyebrows pushing together. “I don’t have…oh, wait.” She unballed the shirt in her hands. “Here, this will work.” She folded the shirt over, using the clean part like a bandage. “I’ll hold it to you until the bleeding stops.”

I put my hand over hers. “I can do it, Addie.” I smiled and flicked my eyes to Rochelle. Adeline nodded and moved to the card table. She sorted through my stuff, arranging it the best she could. I closed my eyes, pretending to be asleep. I wanted Lily and Rochelle to leave so I could be alone with Addie. I wanted to know where she had been. Nate wouldn’t make her work, would he? No, she was worth too much.

Addie sat at the card table, reading, while Lily and Rochelle did their hair. Every few minutes Lily would ask if I was dead. I must have looked pretty fucking bad.

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

I had actually fallen asleep when the basement door opened for Rochelle and Lily to go upstairs and work. I woke when the door slammed shut.

“Jackson,” Addie said and rushed over. She knelt over top of me on the cot, bending down to kiss me. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” I said, carefully pushing myself up on my elbows. “It hurts, I won’t lie, but I’ll be fine.”

She kissed me again and started crying. “I hate this.”

I winced when I lifted my arm up to brush her tears away. “Me too.”

“I have to tell you something,” she blurted.

I moved to the side of the cot. There wasn’t much room, but it was enough for her to sit next to me. “Okay.”

“Zane took me to the doctor,” she said. I raised an eyebrow. That’s where she had gone? “My… my buyer wanted to make sure I didn’t have anything. But I do Jackson, and… and now you do too I’m sure.” She hung her head in shame.

“Hey,” I said quietly, sitting up. The skin around the cut was tight. I moved slowly so I wouldn’t rip open the fragile scab. “Adeline, look at me.”

She turned her head up, her lashes wet with tears. I tipped her chin to my face. “It’s not your fault, you have to know that. I’m not upset with you at all. I don’t think I could ever be upset with you.” I leaned in for another kiss. “What do you have? Are you going to be okay?”

“Chlamydia.” She shook her head. “I fucking have chlamydia. And now you do, too.”

“Are you going to be okay?” I asked, my heart beating fast.

“Yeah. The doctor said it was curable with medicine.” She reached inside her hoodie pocket. “I stole medicine for you, too.” She handed me a white box.

I gave her a half smile. “How’d you do that?”

“It was on the counter. So I took it.” She turned to me, putting her arms around my shoulders. “I’m so sorry.” More tears ran down her face. “I feel so… so dirty.”

“I know,” I said. “I know that feeling. I’m glad you’re going to be okay.”

“You will be too. It’s good you’re taking antibiotics now too.”

“Why?”

She rested her forehead against mine. “I’m scared that cut is going to get infected. Though Nate will let you go to the hospital again, right?”

I didn’t think so. He had assigned half of what I used to do to someone else. Nate was smart. He knew I wasn’t the empty puppet I used to be. He would be looking for a replacement soon. The fact that I had lasted this long should have surprised me “Yeah, he will,” I lied.

“Good. I love you, Jackson.”

“I love you too, Adeline.”

I woke up in pain that next morning. My body hurt from being tased and beaten. The cut on my abdomen itched and hurt at the same time. Adeline urged me to stay in bed, only getting up to use the bathroom and eat.

She washed the cut that morning with soap and water, patting it dry before sending me back to rest. Being in the same room with her was comforting on some level, but having to play the part of friends and not lovers hurt.

She stayed at the card table, reading, when Lily and Rochelle came back that day. Lily had to make sure I wasn’t dead again; she woke me up by poking my face. They didn’t work that evening. Time passed slowly. I wanted to be healed and I wanted to be alone with Adeline. We had to come up with a plan.

On the third day I had been down in the basement, Nate called me upstairs to clean. He had a fading bruise on his cheek. His nostrils flared and he made no attempt to hide the gun on his hip. He told me to clean the kitchen, which had been trashed. Then he stood back and watched, as if it was a challenge: who was faster: me or a speeding bullet?

Even if I weren’t injured, I wouldn’t dare. I moved slowly around the kitchen, scraping what looked like vomit off the counter. There was still a way…I believed it. My mind whirled as I came up with more ideas.

So far, having Lily alert someone seemed the most promising. Though Addie and I both knew a client wasn’t likely to incriminate themselves. I was hoping that the reward money offered in exchange for Addie’s safe return home would be enough.

Three hours later, I moved on to the living room, and then the bathrooms. Then I had to do laundry. I was exhausted and sore by the time I went back downstairs. Addie was curled up on her cot, having fallen asleep with a book in her hand. Rochelle was in front of the mirror, clipping extensions into her hair. Lily sat at the card table, holding her hands above a stack of cards. Her eyes were closed.

“Jackson,” she said then opened her eyes, smiling when she saw me. “I knew it was you. I’m like totally psychic.”

“You’re not psychic,” Rochelle said. “That shit ain’t real.”

“Whatever,” Lily said and went back to the cards. She picked one up, flipped it over and made a face. “Want to test me so I can prove it?” she asked.

“Uh, sure,” I said and sat at the table with her. It felt good to sit. My back hurt and the cut on my stomach pulled when I stood. “How do I test you?”

Lily shuffled the cards on the table. “Pick one, think of the color and then I’ll read your mind.”

“Okay,” I said and picked up a red eight of spades.

“Black,” Lily said.

“No.” I grabbed another. Black queen of diamonds.

“Black,” she said again.

“Yes.”

She clapped her hands together. “See? I like knew you were thinking of it.”

I forced a smile. “Yeah. That’s good.” I flipped cards over for another few minutes before Lily got up to get ready for working that night. She was going to the truck stop. Tonight was supposed to be our day of escape.

My head fell forward, thoughts weighed down with emotion. I shuffled the cards over and over, waiting for Rochelle and Lily to leave. Half an hour later, they went up the stairs, waiting at the top for Zane to open the door.

I put my head in my hands, my mind flashing back to the day I first met Addie. What would life be like if she hadn’t stopped to help Phoebe? Or if I had done something—anything—to allow her an escape?

She’d be fine, that I was sure of. And me… I would have been fine eventually. And by fine I mean the same, hollow, enslaved shell that I used to be. Addie wouldn’t have been able to give enough information to the police to get Zane in trouble. He would have been long gone by the time they got there anyway.

“Jackson?” Addie said, sitting up. The metal springs of the cot groaned as she moved.

“Yeah?” I asked, turning around.

“You okay?”

I stood too fast and flinched. Addie sprang up. She put her arm around me and brought me back to the cot. We sat down and I took Addie’s hand.

“What were you thinking about?” she asked carefully.

“The day we met,” I said. “I know it’s not a pleasant memory for you. Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” She brushed my hair out of my eyes. “I don’t blame you.”

“I know.”

“Then why do you look so guilty?”

I shook my head and inhaled. “Because of what I was thinking.” Addie squeezed my hand, urging me to continue. “You were in the wrong place at the wrong time, obviously. But for me…for me you were in the right place at the right time. I hate that I feel this way. I hate what you’re going through.” I looked into her eyes. “But I’m glad I met you.”

“Jackson…” she started then trailed off, shaking her head. “It might sound crazy but I’m glad I met you too.” She laughed and rested her head on my shoulder. “It’s hard to remember sometimes, but then sometimes it’s like yesterday. I was in the car with my best friend Lynn and my younger sister Arianna. We were driving to the Pride Parade and they were both giving me a hard time about being single. And I… I  tried to tell them that I hadn’t met the right person yet, that I was too young to settle. I never thought I would meet the right person here, and especially under these circumstances.”

“You think I’m the right person?” I asked.

“Yes,” she said with a smile. “I love you.”

“Good. Because I love you too.”

She tipped her head in and kissed me. I wrapped my arms around her, pushing my tongue into her mouth. I brought her  to me, only to wince in pain when her body pressed into my abdomen.

“Sorry!” she said, breaking away.

I shook my head. “It’s fine. I shouldn’t have, uh, moved that fast.”

She nodded. “Want to lay down with me? I’m tired.” We squished together on the cot, facing each other. “Did you take your medicine today?” she asked me.

“Yeah. Did you?”

“I did. I hope it cures me.”

I slipped my fingers under her shirt and rubbed her back. “It will.” She hooked her arm over mine and ran her fingers through my hair until I drifted to sleep.

I sat at the card table, itchy with sweat. I had been down in the basement for over a month now, and a storm had rolled through last night. It was bad, knocking out power lines and trees. The power didn’t go out here, go fucking figure. The electronic locks stopped working in a power outage.

The storm  had brought in humid air, the kind where you feel like you need to shower as soon as you step into it. I had spent the day cleaning up the yard and repairing the roof on the shed. Lou watched me the whole time, holding his gun up to his face and looking at me through the scope.

As soon as Rochelle and Lily left for work, I was going to take a shower. The water was freezing, and cuddling with Addie after an icy shower made it manageable.

“Bye guys,” Lily said and followed Rochelle up the stairs a few minutes later.  I stood, begrudgingly shuffling my feet towards the shower. I turned on the water and stripped out of my clothes. There was no privacy; the shower was out in the open. Sheets had been hung from the rafters to block the toilet from view, at least.

The cut on my stomach was more or less healed. The scab was still there, and the area around the wound was a little pink and puffy. Addie was sure it was infected. It didn’t hurt, so I thought I was fine.

I held my breath and got into the shower, sticking my head under the water first. I washed my hair, shivering by the time the shampoo was rinsed. I grabbed the bar of soap and lathered up my body before rinsing. Clean, I shut the water off and grabbed the towel. I ran it over my hair then wrapped it around my waist.

“Thanks,” I said to Adeline, taking my shirt from her. “It’s warm.”

“I put it under my shirt,” she told me. “It’s all wrinkled now.”

“It doesn’t matter.” I pulled it over my head and stepped into a pair of blue boxers. I toweled my hair again then raked my fingers through it. Shivering, I hurried to the cot. We had to lay on our sides in order to fit together. I spooned around her, burying my face into her hair.

“I love you,” she whispered and kissed my hands, which were clasped around hers.

“I love you too.”

“How are we going to get out of here?” she asked, wiggling around to face me. “There are only two months left.”

I felt sick just thinking about it. “I know,” I said. “I still hope…still think we will find a way. Even if it means—”

“No,” she interrupted. “You’re not sacrificing yourself for me and I’m not letting you risk getting shot. We either leave together or not at all.”

I nodded, not saying that she would be leaving without me if we didn’t do something drastic.

“Don’t worry about that tonight,” I said and pulled her to me. She hooked her leg over mine. “It’s your turn to sleep. I’ll keep watch for the others to come home.”

She nodded and put her hand on my hip. Then she turned her face up and I kissed her. She moved her hand to the small of my back and squeezed me with her leg. I slid my arms under her body and rolled her on top of me.

We kept kissing. Addie cupped my face in her hands then moved her mouth to my neck. We had made love only once down here, and it was rushed, both scared of getting caught. She told me that having sex with me felt good—physically of course—but it was more than that. It was empowering to be able to have sex on her own terms. She said it made her feel more like her old self.

Not only was I happy to help her with that, but it did the same for me too. I had been so degraded, so devalued that part of me didn’t believe I could ever be loved. Being with Addie proved that was wrong.

I put my hands on her slender waist.  Her skin was warm. I moved my hands under her shirt. Sex was empowering, but still triggering. She could only close her eyes if she kept her fingers on one of my many scars, reminding her it was me and not one of the clients who had raped her.

The metal frame of the cot squeaked under us as we resituated. I ran my fingers through Adeline’s hair with one hand. I started getting aroused. She was still on top of me, her core pressing onto my semi-hard cock.

“I want to,” she whispered, tugging at the elastic band of my boxers.

“Are you sure?” I had to ask.

“Yes. I keep thinking this might be our last chance.”

I thought the same thing too. Adeline was still on top of me. “How do you…?” I started then trailed off. I’d been on top every time so far. Not that I’d mind, I wouldn’t at all, but I wasn’t sure how it would be for her.

“Like we did last time,” she said shyly and  hopped off the cot so we could switch positions. “I’m… I’m not ready for anything else.”

“Take your time,” I said and laid down between her legs. I had worried before that she might feel trapped under me. When I asked her about it she said it was the opposite: she felt safe under me.

She pulled my shirt up and over my head. She ran her hands across my chest, feeling each scar. I bent my head down, trailing kisses from her mouth to her neck. She pushed her hands down my chest, fingers sliding under the hem of my boxers. I lifted my hips up, enabling her to wrap her hand around my erection.

She pumped her hand up and down, using her thumb to spread the precum around my shaft. I moved to the side, just enough to move my hand into Adeline’s panties. I took it slow, watching her to make sure it was okay.

She closed her eyes, keeping one hand on my left arm and over the bullet wound. I gently touched her clit, rubbing my finger in a small circle. She opened her mouth and reached down, guiding my fingers into her.

I slightly bent my fingers and moved them inside of her. I was scared to try anything new. Scared it might upset her, and scared she might not like it. I glanced at her, making sure it was okay. Her chest rapidly rose and fell. I took my fingers out of her, pressing my index finger to her clit again. Wet from being inside of her, my fingers glided in smooth circles. She shimmied out of her clothes and I picked up where I had stopped.

She moaned and bent her legs up, putting one around me. She reached down, pushing my boxers off me. I took them off and settled back over top of her. The tip of my dick rubbed against her. She arched her hips and moved her arm down, grasping my cock. She pressed it against her clit and moved her hips up and down.

My heart started racing and I ached to be inside of her. I lowered my head and kissed her. She slipped her tongue into my mouth and pushed my cock down. She let go and moved her hand to the bullet wound.

I entered her. Already wound up, Addie clung onto me, trying not to loudly moan. I pulled back then pushed in. She brought one hand to my ass, squeezing my cheek and pulling me in deeper.

“You can…” she panted. “Faster.”

Holding myself up on my elbows, I kissed her passionately and thrusted faster. Her legs wrapped around me and her nails dug into my skin. She turned her head to the side as she came. Her inner walls tightened around my cock. It felt so good. I sucked at the skin on her neck and continued to thrust in and out of her, my pleasure building up.

The orgasm rippled through me and my breath left in huffs. Panting, I lowered myself onto her, my dick still pulsing inside of her. She closed her eyes and relaxed, running her nails up and down my arm.

“I don’t want that to be the last time,” she whispered.

“It won’t be,” I whispered back and slid out of her. “Want me to get you a tissue?”

“Yeah, that’d be nice.” She pushed herself up on her elbows. I quickly got dressed and walked over to the toilet. I grabbed a wad of toilet paper and brought it to Addie. She wiped up the semen that dripped down her leg. She got dressed and threw the toilet paper away.

We laid back down together. I pulled the blue fleece blanket over our bodies and rubbed Addie’s back until she fell asleep.

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

I stared at the tally marks Addie had scratched in the drywall that surrounded the stairwell. It was a count down, marking each day that had passed. My stomach churned. Almost eight weeks had passed. In a little over a month, she would be gone.

I shook my head, turning to look at her. She was sleeping on the cot, huddled under the blue fleece blanket.  Lily and Rochelle had come back from work a few hours ago, and they were sleeping as well. It was late, and I was tired, but I couldn’t turn my mind off.

I sat at the card table, picking at the food we were allowed for that day. Nerves had killed my appetite. I unwrapped a  Pop-Tart and broke it in half. I forced myself to eat it, knowing I had to eat something. Though I still didn’t see how Addie and I were going to get out of here, not eating and losing strength wasn’t an option.

I chewed the  Pop-Tart, ripping up the plastic wrapper as I thought. Maybe I could barge up the stairs when Lily and Rochelle left. I could catch Zane or Lou off guard…and then they’d shoot me. What if I made some sort of weapon? If there was a way to know that only one person was in the house, it might work.

I didn’t think Zane would let Lou work alone yet. Fuck… even if I did stab whoever opened the door, I didn’t see it ending well. There was nothing down here that was sharp enough to deliver a fatal blow to the heart.

“Jackson?”

I turned around to see Lily sit up and rub her eyes, smearing left over eyeliner on her cheeks. “What are you doing up? It’s like late, right?”

“Yeah. It is.”

She nodded and sat up, swinging her legs over the side of the cot. “I had a nightmare.” She clasped her hands over her elbows and shivered. “I can’t go back to sleep now.”

“You can sit with me,” I offered. She scuttled over. “Want to talk about your dream?” I asked.

She picked up a bruised apple. “It was about Phoebe.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“Me too. I kind of wish I was here, ya know? She was my friend. But I’m also like glad I wasn’t here. That would be too… too much I think. It was good Addie was with her. Phoebe didn’t like being alone down here.”

“She didn’t like being down here at all,” I corrected.

Lily’s eyes flew to Rochelle, as if she was worried I would get caught.

“I hate it down here,” I muttered. “Addie hates it down here. You hate it down here…”

Lily shook her head. Her eyes were misty and she chewed her bottom lip. I knew Lily was having trouble sorting out right from wrong in her mind. Then she nodded. “I know. I hate it too. And I hate that Addie is leaving. Once she’s gone…”

“…She’ll be gone for good,” I filled in. The words hit me like a ton of bricks.

“She likes you, you know,” Lily said with a small smile. She looked up at me.

I felt myself flush. I shook my head. “Nah. Why would anyone like me?”

Lily pursed her lips. “Oh come on. You’re like so helpful.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Such charming qualities.”

“Whatever,” she said and rolled her eyes. “You guys take care of each other. Don’t think I don’t see it,” she said softly. “It’s sweet.”

I pressed my lips together, not knowing how to respond. Lily extended her arm, putting her hand on top of mine.

“Don’t worry,” she whispered. “I won’t say anything.”

“Thanks,” I said then looked into her eyes. “But we’re just friends.”

She rolled her eyes again. She ate, and then asked me to play the psychic card game with her again. We took turns, testing each other until the sun came up. Finally tired, we both went to our cots and laid down.

“Are you just going to sleep?” Addie asked me, only opening her eyes enough to see me.

“Yeah,” I said as I lowered myself onto the cot. “I couldn’t sleep. You know…”

“I do.” She wrinkled her nose and pulled her legs to her chest, groaning.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Still feel sick,” she said, pulling the blanket around her shoulders.

I got up, pressing the back of my hand to her forehead. She hadn’t felt well the last two days. “I hope you’re not getting sick. You don’t have a fever, at least.”

“It’s probably nerves,” she said, opening her eyes. She reached for her cup of water. I refilled it for her then sat on my cot again. “Get some sleep,” she told me. “It’s just a stomach ache; I’m fine.”

I nodded. My eyelids were heavy and I knew I’d be working on something in a few hours. I laid down, facing Adeline. Her eyes were closed again, the grimace still on her face. If she had the flu, would Nate still send her? The buyer made it clear he didn’t want a sick girl. Would having a stomach bug buy us time? Or would it make Adeline unwanted?

Then what would Nate do with her? I tried to force those thoughts away and get some sleep. It didn’t work, and I was still awake when the girls got up that day. I was tired, so I stayed in bed. I could hear Adeline and Lily talking about books. Addie picked one out for Lily to read. She wanted to discuss it together once Lily had read it, like she used to do with her friends before she was taken.

I wanted her to be able to do that again. We had to try. It didn’t matter how dumb or desperate the plan was, I had to do something.

I spent the day doing yard work. Nate decided he wanted new decorative pavers around the shed. I had to move each one by hand, stacking them in the back of a pickup truck. Each paver was heavy and constantly walking back and forth from the shed to the  truck wore me out. The truck could have been driven around and parked next to the shed. It would have saved a lot of time, and saved my back from a lot of hurt.

Though I wasn’t sure of the exact date, I knew it was mid-June. The sun beat down on me. I was hot, but didn’t take my shirt off, not wanting to get burned. I wasn’t allowed to come inside, get anything to eat or drink until I was done. I worked as fast as I could, wanting to get back in.

Zane was on guard, sitting out by the pool getting a tan and drinking a beer. A semi-automatic gun lay across his lap. I didn’t think it had been legally acquired. He told me it was new and he was looking for a good reason to test it out.

The sun was setting when I heaved the last brick into the bed of the truck. Zane finished his beer and pointed to the door. I sighed, marching in through the garage. I rolled my shoulders, muscles aching. Zane used the butt of his machine gun to push me aside, even though I wasn’t in the way, when he went to the garage door. He punched in the code and threw the door open.

The house still smelled like the potpie I had made earlier. It sat on the stove, untouched and wasted. My mouth watered. I would eat it cold and enjoy every bite. Stomach grumbling, I went to the basement, unlocking the door before Zane had a chance to get there.

He slammed it shut behind me when I was only two steps down. I heard the locks slide into place and Zane quickly walk away from the door.

Rochelle and Lily were gone already; it was just Adeline and me in the basement now. “My back fucking hurts,” I mumbled when I saw Adeline. She was standing by the vanity, looking stricken. She was holding something, and her hands shook. “You okay?”

She turned to me, tears in her eyes. The color had left her face. Slowly, she shook her head.

“I’m pregnant,” she said.

A million thoughts ran through my head, with first being that Nate would force her to get an abortion and she might die. I thought about her buyer, and how she wouldn’t be wanted anymore. Nate would kill her and make me bury the body. Then I realized who had gotten her pregnant…me.

“What?” I asked, feeling like I was standing on thin icy, cracking beneath my feet.

She lifted her hand, and I realized she was holding a pregnancy test. Her jaw was tight and her pale face looked a little green. “I’m pregnant,” she repeated, shaking her head. Then she burst into manic laughter, which quickly turned into a sob. I shook  myself. Adeline needed me now more than ever. I ran to her, encasing her in my arms.

“It’ll be okay,” I said without thinking.

“How?” she asked, turning to face me. She wrapped her arms around my neck, still shaking. “They’ll kill you. They really will. Oh God,” she said, breathing so fast she was on the verge of hyperventilating. “Jackson,” she cried. “They will kill you and make me watch. And then…and then…”

“Addie, calm down,” I said, my own voice breaking. No… no… this wasn’t happening. It had to be a mistake. After all this time, how could she get pregnant now? The ice was cracking, splitting…cold water rushed around my feet.

“They will kill you. And then take it from me,” she whispered, and put her hand over her stomach. Then she started crying. I closed my eyes, not allowing myself to break down. Addie needed me. I scooped her up in my arms, carrying her to the cot. I held her tightly against me and sat down, keeping her in my lap.

“No, they won’t. No one will find out,” I said sternly, wishing I could believe what I was saying.

“Even if they don’t, then what?” she asked, her tears soaking my shirt. “I’ll be shipped off to Europe. I can’t hide being pregnant for long. And what will happen to the…” she trailed off, unable to finish her sentence. The baby. Our baby.

Everything swirled around me, moving too fast and being perfectly still at the same time. I loved Adeline. She had saved me, brought me back to life when I had given up, when I wished for death, when I hated waking up day after day. I used to go to bed at night hoping I’d die in my sleep. She was my savior, she was all I needed to wake up and realize that life could be wonderful, that it was worth living.

We had fallen in love in the worst of circumstances and something—someone— had come out of that. The time was less than ideal but we had made this new life together, and I’d be damned if anything was happening to it, or to Adeline.

“Nothing will happen.” I put my hand over Adeline’s, resting on her stomach. “We’re getting out of here.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

“We’ve been saying that for the last two months. And we’re still here,” she said, her voice nothing but a  hollow whisper.

My heart was going a million miles an hour. I took in a breath, forcing myself to stay calm. “I’ll think of something. We have to. You are right, Addie. They will kill me, and I don’t know what will happen to you.” I didn’t want to think about it, but the image of Zane spreading Adeline’s legs and preforming his own abortion flashed in my mind. I held her tighter. “You can’t really be passed off as a born-again virgin anymore.”

“They’ll kill us both.”

I bent my head down, pressing my cheek to hers. “I won’t let that happen.”

She nodded, wiping away her tears. “What if someone notices before we leave?”

“They won’t. You don’t look pregnant.”

She gasped and sat up. “Yes, I do! My skin!” she cried, putting her hands on her cheeks.

“What?”

“Lily said my skin looked nice.”

“That means you look pregnant?”

“The pregnancy glow!” she exclaimed, close to panicking again.

Was that a thing? I have no clue. I had no fucking clue about babies or pregnancy. “I honestly don’t think anyone will come to that conclusion.”

“How can you be sure?”

“I’m not,” I confessed. “It’s what I want, though.”

“Me too.”

I took the test from her grasp and looked at it. Two very clear lines stared up at me. “Yeah … there is no mistaking that.”

“I know.”

I held her close, not speaking. I could feel her heart race. Her breasts smashed into me with each ragged breath she took. How far along was she? She wasn’t pregnant when she had gone to the doctor about two months ago. When would she start showing? Adeline was very thin; would it be obvious on her sooner than others?

“I’m so stupid,” she said, shaking her head. “I stopped taking birth control pills. I … I just didn’t think about it. And we only did it once since then. I didn’t think.”

“You’re not stupid, not at all. Neither of us thought about it,” I said. I certainly didn’t think about it. I came inside of her every time we had sex and never thought twice. I should have pulled out. Or maybe we shouldn’t have had sex at all. Fuck. There was no going back now. “We’re going to get through this. Alive. Both of us.” I ran my hand over her head. “All three of us,” I added softly.

“I love you,” she choked out between sobs.

I kissed her forehead. “I love you too.”

The sound of the garage door opening echoed through the old house. Adeline sat up, climbing off my lap. I held onto her, not ready to let go. The girls were home, and Addie and I had to go back to acting like friends. I didn’t know how I was going to do that in a time like this.

I caught sight of the pregnancy test. Fuck. We couldn’t risk that being discovered. I stood and took the test from Adeline. I snapped it in half as I walked to the toilet. I broke it into small pieces, flushing then away. I turned, eyes meeting Adeline’s. She nodded and stuck her feet under the blanket, lying down to pretend to be asleep. I went to the card table and picked up a book. I flipped through the pages but didn’t read a single word.

Lily and Rochelle clomped down the stairs, talking and carrying on like normal. They had a while before they left again; they came home to refresh their hair and makeup. My stomach was in knots, and I felt like I might throw up. I felt horrible for Adeline. She was suffering from morning sickness, and it was my fault.

I couldn’t keep my eyes on the page. I kept looking up at her, but was only able to see the back of her head. I flipped through the pages of my book, grinding my teeth. We were going to get out of here. We had to. We had no choice. I closed my eyes.

Lily got up and sat by the vanity, curling her hair. Adeline turned her face into her pillow, trying to muffle a sob. My muscles ached to get up and go to her, to hold her and tell her everything was going to be okay. I pressed my feet against the floor. I couldn’t get up and go to her. Not yet. This fucking sucked.

“I miss her too,” Lily said, looking at Addie through the mirror. Adeline’s body went rigid. Then she sat up, wiping her eyes. “I don’t believe in God,” Lily continued. “But I still think she’s in a better place.”

“Anywhere is better than here,” Addie mumbled.

I watched Lily  bite her lip and cast her eyes down, not wanting to agree with Addie while she sat next to Rochelle. She grabbed a section of hair to wrap around the curling iron.

“Ah!” she said and jerked her hand away. She stuck her index finger in her mouth. “Son of a bitch, I burned myself.”

“How bad?” Addie asked.

Lily looked at her hand.  “Not too bad. Enough to hurt like hell though.”

“You’ll live,” Rochelle told her, moving closer to the mirror. She pushed on her breasts, making them look larger than they already were. “Almost ready?”

“Yeah,” she answered. “How do the curls look in the back?”

Rochelle got up and took the curling iron from Lily. “You have it set too high. You’re gonna scorch your hair.”

I went back to the book, reading the same sentence three times but didn’t know what it said. After a few minutes, Lily and Rochelle sat on their cots, making small talk. Adeline got up, moving to the vanity then coming to the card table.

“I have a plan,” she mumbled. I looked up at her, heart racing. Her eyes were wide. “Well, part of one.”

I nodded and stood, going through the box of books. I rustled through them. “What is the plan?”

“Do you smell that?” she asked.

I flicked my eyes to her. “I smell a lot of things down here.”

“The curling iron,” she whispered. “It’s so hot it’s melting the plastic table.”

I opened my mouth to say I’d turn it off. Then I caught the devious hopeful look in Addie’s eyes. “Oh,” I said, wheels turning in my head.

“It’s the only weapon we have,” she said. “I…I just don’t know how to use it.”

I inhaled, breathing in the scent of melting plastic. If that metal rod was hot enough to melt the plastic vanity table then it was hot enough to cause some serious burns. “I do,” I said. “We need to get Zane down here.” Something clicked into place. “We need to make him come down here.”

Addie nodded, opening a book. “And how do we do that?”

I shook my head, picking up another book. “We need to show affection to each other. Rochelle will tell him. I know she will. I…I have to touch you or something while she’s watching. But it can’t be obvious.”

“I’ll follow  your lead,” she said.

“Okay. We will… uh…”

“You hide,” she said. “And surprise him from behind. I’ll get the curling iron.”

I blinked, not liking Addie having an active role in all of this. I didn’t want her to get hurt. “Okay,” I finally said, seeing no other way. “We get too close, hope Rochelle goes upstairs, and then move into position. Turn on the shower, make Zane think I’m in there. If we’re lucky, he’ll go right for it.”

“And I’ll hit in in the face with the hot curling iron,” she said, almost smiling.

“Disable him long enough to get upstairs before he does. Then we’ll get the keys and get out of here.”

“Where are the keys?” she asked.

“I don’t really know,” I admitted. “Probably in the mudroom. That’s where Nate used to keep them when I had no way of getting out of the house.”

“If we can’t find them, we’ll have to run on foot.” She shook her head.

I sat, opening a book. “It’ll work. And if Zane doesn’t come down today, he will eventually. You should get ready just in case.” I swallowed my pounding heart.

Adeline was shaking. She pushed herself up off the table, taking slow, shallow breaths, and went to the vanity, pretending like she was only there to brush her hair. Then she got dressed in black leggings and brown boots with a low heel.

Rochelle was watching her. She had to be wondering why Adeline was getting dressed. Good. Let her wonder. The more suspicion she raised the better. I flipped through the book, waiting for Adeline to relax into her cot. I took a breath. Everything inside of me was alive. I thought the plan was too shocking to allow me to feel real nerves. We were doing this—now. And then we’d be free.

I moved to my cot to put my shoes on. Then I moved to Adeline’s cot, sitting next to her. Just being near her calmed my nerves. It didn’t feel like a plan of escape. Everything felt natural, right. I was supposed to be by her side. Adeline sat up so tensely I could feel it.

“We can do this,” I whispered.

“Yes,” she said, eyes locking with mine. She closed them and took a breath. Then she put her hand on my thigh. I leaned back on the mattress, close enough to Addie that our bodies touched. She leaned over me and picked up the book I had placed at the foot of the bed.

“This part always makes me sad,” she said slowly, sitting up. We were sitting close together, but not in an obvious way. Still, it would be enough for Rochelle to get suspicious. “When Scarlet falls down the stairs.”

“Yeah,” I agreed, leaning closer. I tipped my head next to hers and read a passage aloud. The basement door creaked open. Adeline froze, her entire body tensing up.

“You can do this,” I reminded her.

“I don’t know,” she replied.

“Yes.” I looked into her eyes.

She quickly nodded. “Okay.”

The girls moved to the bottom of the stairs. I looked over Addie’s head and saw Lily grabbing Rochelle’s hand.

“Rochelle, no,” she whispered. Addie tensed again, but pretended not to hear. I slid my hand along the mattress and onto her back, inching it over until it settled in the curve of her waist.

“Just…no,” Lily begged. “It’s nothing. He’s trying to make her feel better. You saw her crying over Phoebe. She doesn’t like him like that.” Lily shook her head, her long earrings rattling and tangling with her hair. I hoped Lily would run with us, that she’d see us making a break for it and join in. But I had my doubts on who she’d side with.

Rochelle went up the stairs. After a second’s hesitation, Lily went up after her. I stood, reaching for Adeline. Her fingers laced through mine one last time. I nodded to her and moved to the shower, turning it on and pulling the curtain. Then I stood against the side of the staircase and out of immediate sight.

Addie unplugged the curling iron, wrapping the cord around the handle. She hurried back to the cot, sitting with her back to the stairs.  My heart raced. Adrenaline surged through me. I held my arms out, ready for a fight and having to remind myself to breath.

Zane hurried down the stairs, coming to a stop as soon as his feet touched the cement. “Where’s Jackson?” he asked.

Right here, mother fucker. I held my breath and didn’t move.

“Shower,” Adeline mumbled without turning around to look at him.

“I heard something interesting,” Zane said, practically skipping to the shower. He had a gun tucked into the back of his pants. I had to get it away from him. Then use it.

I didn’t take my eyes off of Zane. He snuck forward, arm raised, ready to strike and yank back the shower curtain. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Adeline get up.

Zane grabbed the curtain and yanked it back. “You’re dead—” he started, cutting off as soon as he saw the empty shower. He whipped around, furious he had been tricked. “What the—” He didn’t have a chance to finish his question. Adeline’s arm went up, pressing the hot metal into his cheek.

Zane recoiled, crying out in pain. I rushed over. Adeline shoved Zane forward then pulled the curling iron back. The scent of charred flesh hung heavy in the air. Zane’s hands flew to his face and he fell to his knees. I didn’t wait. I kicked in between his shoulder blades. Zane toppled over. I grabbed the gun and tossed it to Adeline.

“My face!” Zane cried. “Look at what she did to my face!”

I jumped on top of him, yanking his arm back and shoving him face first onto the floor. Adeline held the gun out in front of her.

“Do it Addie. Now!” I yelled.

Her arms were shaking. She aimed the barrel at Zane’s head. I closed my eyes and leaned away. But no shot rang out. I looked back at Adeline, struggling to keep Zane still. She pulled the trigger again but nothing happened.

“Cock it!” I told her. Fuck. I should have gone over that with her before. I’d never used the gun myself, but I’d seen Nate and Zane use them enough to know what to do. Zane twisted, trying to pull out of my grasp. I ground my teeth together and shoved him back into the ground. My heart hammered. We needed to get out of here. We needed to run.

I opened my mouth to tell Addie how to cock the gun when something blurred past me. I hadn’t heard her come down the stairs. But there she was, throwing herself onto Addie. They both fell, and the gun got knocked out of Adeline’s hand.

“You bitch!” Rochelle screamed, pinning Adeline to the ground.

“Addie!” I screamed. No! Addie could get hurt. I had to go to her, stop Rochelle. Getting beaten up could make her lose the—

Zane’s foot hit me in the back and knocking me off balance. I fell forward, recovering quickly. Zane was over top of me in seconds. He brought his arm up, sending it down to collide with my face. I moved out of the way and sprang to my feet. I whirled around, nostrils flaring.

Zane’s lips were pulled up in a growl. A long section of red, raw skin ran down his cheek from where the curling iron had burned him. His stance faltered when he saw the anger in me. I jerked forward and kicked him in the stomach.

Zane’s breath came out in a huff and he doubled over. I brought my knee up, clipping him in the nose. Blood splattered onto the floor. I hit him as hard as I could on the side of his head. He stumbled back, falling into the wall. I glanced up, seeing Adeline struggling to get away from Rochelle.

Turning back to Zane, I took one more swing. He slid down the wall and onto the floor. I rushed over to Adeline. I reached down, pulling her to her feet. She looked behind her for the gun. Zane was slowly getting up. There wasn’t time to get the gun. We had to go.

I took her hand, racing through the basement. We ran around the card table, not stopping until we were at the base of the stairs. I held out my arm, wanting Adeline to go first. If Zane got to us, I could slow him down long enough for Addie to get out.

Adeline scrambled up the stairs. I was right behind her, moving as fast as my legs allowed me. She dove into the kitchen. I jumped onto the landing, grabbing the basement door. I slammed it shut and shot the deadbolt into place.

Panting, she turned and looked at me. Holy fuck. We had gotten out of the basement. There was no time to celebrate. And we weren’t free yet.

Adeline took off into the mudroom to search for keys. I went into the breakfast nook, picking up a chair. I held it in the air, ready to smash the window as soon as she came back with the keys. Ten seconds slowly ticked by. Rochelle’s sobs were muffled by the door but were still obvious. Zane let loose a string of profanities.

Adeline raced into the kitchen, holding up the keys. A knot in my chest loosened. We had a way out. We were really doing this! I raised the chair.

“What the hell is going on?” Lily asked, standing in the middle of the kitchen. She was terrified.

“We’re getting out of here,” Addie said, moving closer. “Come with us.”

I turned my head and threw the chair through the window. The glass shattered, and a high-pitch alarm blared throughout the house. Lou raced out of his room, the floor shaking under his weight.

“Come!” Addie yelled to Lily. Lily looked at Addie’s outstretched hand. She wrapped her arms tightly around herself and shook her head, too scared to move.

“We don’t have time!” I called over the alarm. I took Addie’s hand, pulling her forward. “She made her choice.” I bent my arm, using my elbow to break away the remaining glass. I ducked through, landing on the deck. I extended my hands and helped Adeline crawl through the sharp glass.

“I’ll send help!” she promised Lily. Rochelle pounded on the basement door, demanding Lily to open the door. Adeline squeezed my hand and gracefully landed on the deck next to me. We immediately took off, racing down the driveway. Adeline skidded to a stop, dropping the keys. She screamed with frustration but scooped them up. She unlocked the Blazer and got in the driver’s seat.

“Go!” I shouted, diving in to the passenger seat. Adeline’s hands were shaking so much she couldn’t get the keys in the ignition. I reached over, steadying her hand. Together, we started the SUV. She put it in reverse and stomped on the gas, backing out of the driveway. We were still rolling backwards when she threw it into drive. The engine revved, peeling out of the driveway.

She turned onto the street pushing the pedal all the way down. I turned around. My heart skipped a beat. Fuck, no! The garage door opened and the driveway illuminated with the taillights of the Camaro.

“He’s following us,” I blurted.

“Who?”

“Zane or Lou. I don’t know, maybe both. Step on it, Addie. Their car is faster.” White hot nerves tingled throughout my body. I knew the Blazer was pushing it. It couldn’t go much faster.

“Which way?” she asked, pressing her foot down. The Blazer lurched forward, engine squealing.

“Straight,” I told her. “I’ll tell you when to turn.” I reached behind me, grabbing my seatbelt. “Put your seatbelt on.” She grabbed it, pulling it halfway. Her hands were shaking so much I reached over and grabbed it, clicking it into place.

A gunshot rang across the dark field, echoing off the road. My heart stopped beating. I felt like I had plummeted into cold, dark water. Adeline screamed and I twisted around. The Camaro was gaining on us. I didn’t blink. I didn’t breathe. No… no… we were so close. So fucking close.

The Blazer started to shake. I whipped back around, eyes wide as I looked at the dash. The engine was threatening to overheat!

“There’s a turn up ahead,” I told her, looking back at the road. “Go to the right!”

Adeline let off the gas. The SUV slowed. The headlights illuminated the road sign. She slammed on the brakes. We almost missed it, but we made the turn. She put her foot down again, sending the old  Blazer forward.

My heart pounded against the confines of my chest, beating so hard it hurt. Sweat rolled down my back and my teeth were clamped together. I watched the road disappearing underneath us, scared to turn around. I blinked, then looked back

“They missed the turn,” I said. Holy shit. The Camaro backed up before it whipped around. It bought us time. Was it enough? Fuck. My chest heaved with each breath. I shook my head. I had to stay calm for Addie’s sake.

“They’re going to catch up!” she cried. “Should we get out and run?”

I took a second to process that. “No,” I said. It was too risky. “There is a state road just ahead. You can’t see it past the trees.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” she cried.

“It’s busy. Zane might not—”

A bullet shot through the back window. The glass shattered. Adeline screamed again, accidently jerking the wheel. The SUV dangerously swerved.

“Are you okay?” I asked her.

“I think so,” she said, voice shaking. “You?”

“Yeah.” I turned around. “Fuck.” She looked over at me, and the  Blazer swerved again. “Eyes on the road, Addie!”

Headlights flashed through the trees. I leaned forward, pressing my feet against the floor like it was the gas pedal. Come on… come on… the road was getting closer. Even if Zane didn’t let up, once we were around people, someone would hear the shots and alert the police.

My eyes widened and my breathing increased. We were getting closer! The Blazer pushed forward. Fuck, we were almost there!

More shots rang out from behind us, rapid and desperate. Time stood still. I turned, wanting to use my body to protect Addie. Then something warm splattered on my face. I looked down and the pain hit me.

Blood dripped down my chest. I fell forward against the seatbelt. I raised my arm and pressed my hand over the bullet wound. I had been shot between my neck and shoulder. I couldn’t move my left arm.

“Jackson!” Adeline screamed, turning to me.

A car honked, and bright lights rushed toward us. We were in the intersection. The brake pedal squeaked when Adeline pressed it down. The Blazer fishtailed. I lifted my head and saw a car barreling towards us.

Then everything went black.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

My eyes fluttered open. I couldn’t move. Bright lights shone down on me. Everything hurt.

Adeline.

I had no idea where I was. But I knew I had to get to her. Something cold pressed against my head. It hurt—bad. I tried to open my eyes again but couldn’t. I knew someone was touching me, and the distant sound of voices echoed in my head.

Adeline’s face flashed before me. Then I passed out.

People shuffled around me. I could feel their heat and hear their hushed voices. My head throbbed and my mouth was dry. I desperately wanted water. I couldn’t open my eyes. They were too heavy and I was too weak.

I slipped into a dark sleep. I had no idea how long I was out. I came to hearing voices again, though this time one was familiar. I tried to open my eyes again and failed. Something was tight on my right arm. A steady beeping came from the side.

“Jackson,” someone whispered. The same person took my right hand, rubbing circles on my palm.

“Jackson,” she said again. “We made it. We got out.” I remembered that voice; I liked that voice.

Adeline.

“Jackson,” she said again and ran her hand over my hair. “Jackson?”

Everything inside of me wanted to go back to sleep. I felt heavy, so heavy. And I was in a lot of pain. My eyes opened for a fleeting moment and I saw her beautiful face.

“Addie,” I mumbled.

“Yes, Jackson,” she said, trying not to cry. “I’m here.”

Adeline.

I had to save her, make sure she was okay. I tried sitting up, pushing past the pain.

“Hi Jackson,” someone else said. “I’m your nurse. You just had surgery and need to stay laying down, okay?”

“Okay,” I agreed, my fuzzy mind not taking in anything she was saying. I tried to sit up again. I needed to get to Adeline.

“Jackson you need to rest,” Adeline said.

“I have to save you,” I whispered and inhaled. I forced my eyes open. She was there, standing next to me with tears in her eyes. Her face  was scratched and bruised, but she was okay. She was here, with me. We were out.

“You did,” she whispered back. “You did save me.” Tears rolled down her face and she bent over the bed. I lifted my right arm, not realizing it was hooked up to IVs, and hugged her.

“Are you okay?” I asked her.

“I’m fine,” she said. My arm was too heavy to keep around her. It fell back onto the bed. My eyes threatened to close again. “Rest.”

I tried to tell her she needed to rest too, but my words came out a jumbled mess. I was still too drugged from surgery. I couldn’t form a coherent sentence. I let my eyelids drop shut. Adeline took my hand again, patiently waiting until I woke up again.

I turned my head to her and reached out. My fingers touched her stomach, resting over our baby. I looked in her eyes, needing to know if it was okay too. She put her hand over mine and nodded, letting me know the baby was okay.

I curled my fingers around hers. “Addie,” I said. “We did it. We’re free.”

“It hasn’t sunk in yet,” she said, shaking her head.

“It will,” I told her and closed my eyes. I was becoming more aware of everything around me…and of the pain I was in. “Why did I have surgery?” I opened my eyes. The skin on the left side of my head was tight and my left shoulder hurt. I looked down and realized that my arm was taped to my chest, keeping it in place.

“You don’t remember what happened?” Addie asked, eyebrows pushing together.

“No,” I said and thought back. I had a headache and I was starting to feel nauseous.

Addie looked at the nurse beside me, needing to know if it was okay to tell me. “You were shot and then we were in a car accident. Your collarbone shattered and you have some minor head trauma…along with some old injuries that never healed properly.”

“I was shot again?” I asked, arching my eyebrows.

Adeline laughed. She shook her head, face breaking. “I don’t know why I’m laughing,” she said, wiping her tears. “It’s not funny.”

“Hey,” I soothed, trying to sit up again. “It’s okay, Addie. We’re both here. Together.”

She ran her fingers through my hair. A few strands pulled and snapped. I reached up, feeling bandages on the left side of my head. “Lay back,” she said gently and leaned over the bed, pressing her lips to mine. “You need to rest.”

I nodded and relaxed against the pillow. “How did my collarbone shatter?”

“From being shot,” she explained. “The head injury is from the accident.”

If I thought hard enough, I was sure I could remember everything. I didn’t want to yet. “And you’re sure you’re okay?”

“I am.” She held up her left arm, which was in a brace. “My wrist is sprained. They said I have a mild concussion but I feel fine, just tired. I was dehydrated too, but I got an IV of fluids and now I’m fine.”

I just looked at her, afraid to believe what she was telling me. Was it too good to be true? Before I could question her more, the same nurse who had been by my bedside stepped over to assess me then gave me pain medicine. I needed it; as the sedative from surgery wore off, the more I felt the pain. She warned us it would make me tired and possibly confused.

“I’m not leaving you,” Adeline said, squeezing my hand.

“I know you won’t,” I said, eyes fluttering closed. “I love you, Addie.”

“I love you too, Jackson.”

I let the medicine pull me under, my entire body relaxing completely for the first time in years. I wasn’t quite asleep, yet I was dreaming. In my mind, I saw Zane walk into the hospital. The beeping of the heart monitor sped up.

I startled awake, hurting my injured shoulder. I blinked, unable to pull myself out of the nightmare. Was Zane here? Where was he? I had to get him before he got to Adeline!

“Jackson,” Addie spoke. “It’s okay. I’m right here.”

“Zane,” I panted, eyes darted around the room, unable to focus. “I…I have to…”

“Jackson, it’s okay,” she said, standing and putting her hand on my right shoulder. She pushed me down gently, but that just freaked me out even more.

“Zane…Zane might come,” I spit out, slurring my words. Fuck. What did they give me? Maybe the nurse hadn’t given me anything. Maybe Zane had poisoned me!

“Jackson, calm down,” Addie said. She was scared, and I was too drugged to realize she was worried I was going to get hurt.

“I won’t…won’t let him get you,” I panted. The heart monitor beeped faster.

The nurse rushed over. “Hey Jackson,” she said, voice calm. “Honey, you’re fine. No one can come in here without being let in. We know about your situation. There’s even a police officer outside the recovery area.”

I shook my head. That didn’t matter. Zane was a sneaky motherfucker. He could find a way in. I pushed the nurse out of the way. My stomach twisted. I wasn’t taking that chance.

“No,” I said, sitting up again. “I have to stop him.”

“Honey,” the nurse repeated. “You’re going to hurt yourself. You’re not strong enough to get up.” She put her hand on my arm. “Page the doc,” she said to someone else. “We need something for anxiety. Now.”

“Addie,” I slurred, trying to move to her.

“Jackson,” she said, bending down. I wrapped my good arm around her, overcome with emotion. “It’s okay, Jackson. You saved me. Zane can’t come in here.”

“You… you… don’t believe that,” I whispered.

“I want to,” she admitted. “But right now I want you to get better. You’re really hurt, Jackson. Please, lay down.”

I was tired. Lying down sounded like a good idea. Addie fixed my pillow and I leaned back. A tear rolled down her cheek. “Don’t cry, Addie,” I said.

Another nurse came over and stuck a needle into my IV. In a matter of seconds, I was asleep.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

The next time I woke up, I was in another room. Adeline was by my side. She had changed into a pair of sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt. Her hair was in a messy bun on the top of her head.

“Hey,” she said, blinking away the sleep. “Jackson, it’s me. I’m here.”

“I know,” I said as I inhaled.

“You’re in the intensive care unit,” she said. “This unit is locked, don’t worry.”

I nodded and looked around the room. It was large, with glass windows on one side facing the nurses’ station and a whole bunch of monitors on the other side. The curtain had been drawn half closed over the windows.

“Don’t move your arm,” Addie said, standing up. “You had pins put in.” I nodded; even that small movement hurt. It was tempting to reach up and touch the bullet wound. Addie had said my collarbone had shattered. Just how bad was it? “They’re keeping you pretty drugged up,” she explained, pushing my hair back. “But you can have more medicine if you need it. How are you feeling?”

I blinked. “I don’t know.”

She gave me a small smile. “I’ll take that as good. For now.” She let out a breath and shook her head. “I kind of can’t believe you’re okay.” She closed her eyes. “I was so scared, Jackson. They took you away and… and…” she broke off, crying.

“I’m sorry,” I said, reaching with my right arm. I couldn’t lift it very far; an IV line had been inserted in my arm.

“Don’t be sorry,” she said and leaned in, gingerly wrapping her arms around me. I breathed her in, wish she could get in the bed with me.

“What happened?” I asked.

She let me go and sat back down in her chair. It had been scooted close to the bed. She didn’t let go of my hand.

“With everything.”

Her lips pulled up in a half smile. “I’m still not following, Jackson.”

“At the house.”

“Oh,” she said and stiffened. “I talked to the police. They are searching for Zane and Nate as well as everyone else involved. They went to the house. Rochelle was gone but Lily was still there. She’s with child services right now. It’s weird to think about how young she is, isn’t it?”

I nodded. “But she’s safe?”

Adeline nodded. “Yes. I kept bugging the police officer that’s outside your room until he told me. I don’t think he was supposed to. But I was so worried about Lily.” She blinked away tears. “My family and Lynn and even my dogs are at a safe house somewhere. They’ll come once the police say it’s safe.” She rubbed her forehead. There were dark circles under her eyes. “I’m nervous to see them. Isn’t that weird? I wanted nothing more than to  go home, and now I’m scared.”

I squeezed her hand. “Not weird. A lot has happened.”

“I know.” She sighed and turned her head down.

“You should sleep,” I said. “You need extra sleep now.”

Adeline’s eyes widened. Then she smiled. “The nurse told me I’m probably seven weeks along.”

My head fell to the side. “I’m sorry, Addie, but I don’t really know much about pregnancy.”

She smiled for real that time. “It’s okay. I don’t either. We have like thirty weeks left to learn.” She shook her head. “But don’t worry about that now. You need to get better.”

I nodded, not realizing just how bad I was until the doctor came in to see me a few hours later. Like Adeline said, I had been shot. The bullet hit me in the back, going all the way through my body. It went right through my collarbone. I had pins in my arm and the doctor said it would take lots of physical therapy to get back to normal, but it was possible.

I had stitches on the left side of my head. The skin  had been sliced open from the car accident. And my ribs were still broken from previous beatings, all in various stages of healing since the beatings were spread out.

The wound on my stomach had gotten infected, despite Adeline's and my best efforts. The doctor said the infection was inside the wound and that was why we didn’t see it. I was on antibiotics for that. I lost so much blood from getting shot and cracking my head open in the accident to warrant a blood transfusion.

The doctor said I  was lucky to be alive. I agreed. I was lucky. Lucky we made it out of the basement. Lucky neither of us was hurt worse. And lucky to have Adeline with me throughout the whole ordeal.

Adeline sat at the edge of the bed, flipping through black and white photographs. Another day had passed, and she had gotten her first ultrasound that morning. It was a bit surreal to see the little white blob on the screen. And it was even more surreal to see the little white blob’s heart beating.

“It’ll be okay,” I said, reaching for her hand. She smiled at the picture once more then set the photographs down. She linked her fingers through mine.

“I know,” she said, taking my hand. I struggled to keep my eyes open. I’d had a bad headache all morning, which spurred more concern from the nurses in the ICU than I expected. After some tests and close monitoring, I was given more pain medicine that pretty much knocked me right out. “I’m nervous to see them. Is that weird?” she asked, looking into my eyes. “All I wanted was to get out and go back home and see my family. And now that they are on their way here…” she trailed off, shaking her head. “I don’t know what to say.”

“It’s not weird,” I mumbled. I hoped I’d be more alert by the time her family arrived. Adeline wasn’t technically admitted to the hospital like I was, but she refused to leave my side. Her family as well as her best friend Lynn—and even her dogs, since they received threats from Zane—had been taken to a safe house right away. Adeline had the option to go to them, but she didn’t even think about it.

So now they were on their way here. If I wasn’t so drugged, I’d be nervous. I hadn’t encountered anyone other than the girls who knew my past, who knew that I was a slave. Thinking about it made me feel weird, almost like an object. Yeah, I’d been around people and in public, but I had been able to slink through crowds unnoticed. And no one knew what I had been through before.

I preferred it that way.

I hadn't yet spoken to the police. Adeline had, more than once, telling them everything she could. I knew they were going to question me next, and that my statement was vital for getting Nate and Zane as well as everyone else involved behind bars. The doctor taking care of me said I was too critical for questions. Plus, I was drugged up. Whatever I said might not make sense.

“How am I supposed to tell my mom I’m pregnant?” she asked, biting her lip. “Or tell her what I’ve been through?”

I shook my head, and then winced. Having a broken collarbone was more painful than I ever imagined. Every movement hurt. “I don’t know, Addie. You know them and I don’t. But I’m sure your mom will be so happy to see you nothing else will matter.”

“You’re right,” she said and placed her hand on her stomach.

I was worried her parents would be mad at me for getting her pregnant. I got that weird feeling again, and imagined her father yelling at me. I closed my eyes. No. Her dad wasn’t like Nate. He wouldn’t punish me.

“They’ll like you,” she said, reading me.

I opened my eyes and forced a smile. “Maybe.”

“Jackson,” she said, standing from the chair she was sitting in. She perched on the edge of the bed, leaning over me. “I love you. They will too.” I didn’t object. How could they like me? I was…I was nothing. I squeezed my eyes closed. Why was I feeling like this again? We were free. Shouldn’t I be happy?

“You saved me,” Addie whispered.

I opened my eyes. “They will be thankful for that. I’m the guy who got you out.”

Her eyes clouded with worry. She gently ran her fingers through my hair. “You’re so much more than that. I love you,” she said again.

“I love you too,” I told her. I reached up with my right arm, pulling the IV tubes, and kissed her. She settled in the bed next to me, being careful not to hurt me. Having her next to me was worth the physical pain.

I turned down my next dose of pain medication, wanting to be with it when the Millers came to see Adeline. My chest tightened when I thought of them. I didn’t know what was going to happen after.

I knew there would be a lot of crying and hugging. Would they ask Adeline for details? She didn’t need to go through it again; it was too much for her.

“How are you feeling?” I asked, slowly turning my head.

“Okay right now,” she said. “They gave me something for the nausea.”

“Sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry.”

“I feel bad,” I admitted. “It’s my fault you feel sick.”

“It’s both our faults,” she said and put her hand over mine. “It doesn’t really seem real, does it?”

“None of this does,” I told her, twisting my wrist so our hands were laced. “I think being drugged up isn’t helping.” I smiled.

“Probably not. You look tired. Get some rest, Jackson.”

I nodded and let my eyes close. After what felt like only minutes later, Adeline gently woke me.

“They’re here,” she said, eyes wide. “I can hear them in the hall.”

I tried to straighten up but only ended up hurting myself. Adeline stood, helping me move in the bed. She took the ultrasound pictures from the bedside table and stashed them under the pillow. Then she sat back down next to me, taking my hand.

I wished I could stand and hold her, be the one comforting her. I hated that I was injured and weak.

“I can’t do this,” she blurted, turning to me, frantically shaking her head.

I squeezed her hand. “Yes, you can. You’re strong, Addie.”

She relaxed, keeping a tight grip on my hand. “I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you,” she whispered.

The curtain was pulled over the glass wall, the one facing the nurse’s station. I stared at it, looking at the small gap between the curtain and the floor. My heart sped up when I saw shoes. Four people stopped by the door.

“Should I knock?” someone asked.

“No, just go in. I need to see her!” another cried. That had to be Adeline’s mother.

Addie squeezed my hand again. Tears welled in her eyes. The door opened and her family stepped in.

“Adeline,” her mother said, tears streaming down her face. Addie stood, but didn’t let go of my hand.

“Hi, mom,” she said. Then she broke down into sobs. Everyone took their turns hugging her. Her younger sister Arianna looked like Adeline. They had the same green eyes, golden brown hair, and high cheekbones. Lynn, her best friend, was several inches shorter than Addie and had thick blonde hair that was twisted on the back of her head in a braid. Her mother was thin and I wondered if she had always been like that or if a year of missing her daughter made her rapidly lose the weight. Her father was tall with a head of gray hair.

None of them had noticed me yet. I was glad. Just watching the tears and the hugs made me feel awkward. Adeline was still crying, letting go of one family member just to hold onto the next. It made me emotional watching her; I knew how badly she wanted this.

And she got it.

Her sister wiped her eyes and stood to the side. She looked away from Addie, eyes settling on me. She was surprised, as is she was just now realizing there was someone else in the room.

“Is this him?” she asked, but no one heard her question. She shuffled forward, putting her hands on the food of the bed. “Is this him?” she asked again.

Adeline was wrapped in her mother’s arms. She turned, eyes meeting mine. She broke out of her mother’s embrace and stepped back over to me.

“This is Jackson,” she sniffled. “Jackson, this is my mom, dad, sister, and friend.”

The attention was turned on me. I forced a smile. That’s what I was supposed to do. Adeline’s father rushed over, extending his hand.

“You saved our little girl,” he said, voice shaking. “I can never thank you enough.”

I felt my cheeks flush. It hurt to shake Mr. Miller’s hand. His grip was tight, and he moved my arm up and down quickly. Everyone else did the same, taking their turn to thank me for getting Adeline out of hell. Really, we got each other out, but I didn’t say anything.

Everyone stood back, no one knowing what to do next. Adeline sat at the edge of the bed, reaching behind her for my hand. A hush fell over the room.

“I knew you’d come back,” her sister finally spoke. “I always knew it.”

“We all did,” her mother said. “I prayed every night. I just wanted my daughter back.” And then everyone was crying and hugging again.

A while later, a nurse came in to check on me and give me medication. Adeline’s family stepped out of the room.

“How are you two doing?” the nurse asked. “That’s a lot to take in. Do you need a break?”

I did, but I wasn’t going to say anything. I’d do whatever Adeline wanted.

“I feel bad saying yes,” Addie said, casting her eyes down.

The nurse put her hand on Adeline’s arm. “You’ve been through a lot. If you two need some time alone, I will handle it.”

Addie bit her lip but nodded. “I do.”

The nurse smiled. “Your family needs to eat anyway,” she said with a wink. “And the food court closes in an hour. Don’t worry about feeling bad. You need to do what you need so you can heal. Both of you.”

“Thank you,” I said, feeling sleepy from the pain meds already. I scooted to the side of the bed, giving Adeline enough room to lie down next to me. She moved the IV lines so she wouldn’t pull them and laid down, stretching out her legs. She rested her head against me and closed her eyes.

I watched the nurse go out of the room and talk with Addie’s family. I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer. A knot in my chest loosened. Addie had been reunited with her family. As the medicine coursed through me, blocking out the pain, I almost felt happy.

Almost.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

“Ready to go home?” Adeline asked me, eyes sparkling.

I stood, looking out the hospital window. Home was Adeline’s house. It was never a question for Addie. She knew I was coming home with her, that we would live together and start over. She had her family and friends, who were a very large support group.

I had nothing, no one.

Only Addie.

A few days ago, when Adeline had fallen asleep in the uncomfortable chair next to the hospital bed, someone from a shelter came in to talk to me. The woman’s name was Tessa, and she said the shelter was funded by an organization that helped trafficked survivors. I didn’t even know places  like that existed. I stared at her, wide eyed, as the realization that people knew about modern day slaves sunk in.

Tessa kindly explained that the shelter offered survivors, like me, a safe place to stay as well as services needed to assimilate back into society. I liked the way she called us survivors, and not victims. That’s what we were, after all.

When Adeline woke up and saw the brochure sitting on the nightstand, she looked at me with tears in her eyes, thinking I didn’t want to be with her. It was the exact opposite; I wasn’t sure she’d still love me. She didn’t need me, and my whole life’s worth had always depended on being needed, not wanted.

She just kissed me and promised she loved me, and that she would always love me. She wanted me in her life, of course, and didn’t want to be away from me ever again. That was all the convincing I needed. Later that day, Adeline’s parents made it clear I was invited to their house—our house.

I looked up at Addie, nerves bubbling in my stomach. “Yes.”

“Me too,” she said, coming around the bed to stand next to me.

I turned toward her, wrapping my right arm around her waist. I had spent over a week in the hospital. Adeline stayed by my side the entire time. I tipped my head down, pressing my lips into her neck. She smelled good, like lavender.  My left arm was in a sling, and I was still in a great deal of pain. I had stitches above my right eye and some of the bruises had started to fade.

Adeline carefully wrapped her arms around my waist, hugging me for a few seconds before stepping back.

“What do you want to wear?” she asked.

I looked at the new clothes her friend Lynn had brought me. I literally had nothing. Between Adeline’s mother and her friend Lynn shopping for me, I was pretty sure I had more clothes now that I ever had before.

“I don’t care,” I said. “Something comfortable.”  In preparation for the long drive from the hospital to Adeline’s house, I had been given a shot of morphine. I was more than a little out of it.

“Okay,” she said and picked out a pair of gray athletic pants and a blue t-shirt. She closed the door to my hospital room and helped me undress from the pajamas I was wearing. It was odd, needing help and then getting it. Addie doted on me, doing everything she could to make me comfortable. I liked it, but wanted her to rest. She objected, saying she was fine since she had been given medicine to rid her morning sickness. And, she said over and over, I took care of her in the farmhouse. She wanted to take care of me.

I closed my eyes when she slid my arm out of the sling. Getting dressed wasn’t fun. It hurt to move my arm. I had a nasty scar in between my neck and shoulder from the bullet and from surgery. Though I had only been a week out of surgery, I was told I was healing well.

Once dressed, Addie packed up my stuff and put it by the door. She checked the clock then sat next to me, twisting her hands in her lap. I knew she was nervous to go home. The confines of the hospital offered controlled safety. We only saw her family, the news reporters weren’t allowed inside, and everything was scheduled. There were no surprises. We knew what to expect.

Going home was another story. Nate and Zane were still out there. Lou had been arrested but refused to talk. The last time we spoke with the police, they said they believed Nate had left the country. No one could find Rochelle. I was sure she was with Zane, helping him hide from the law in whatever way possible.

Lily was still in state custody; it was hard to get any details about her well-being. All we knew was she was safe and getting professional help. Then she’d be placed in a foster home. The thought made me shudder. Foster homes didn’t bring up good memories for me.

I bent over, trying to  lace my shoes. I got hit with a wave of dizziness. I staggered forward, catching myself on the bed.

“I’ll get it,” Addie said.

I waved my hand. “I’m fine.”

Addie pressed her lips together, standing back. I got one shoe on then gave up, unable to tie it one handed. I hated being so limited in what I could do.

Someone knocked on the door. Adeline went around the bed to open it. A police officer stepped in. We had been kept guarded since the day we escaped, and we would stay guarded until Zane was caught. He was crazy enough to come after us just for revenge.

Adeline’s family was behind the officer. Mrs. Miller came in first, carrying a stuffed bunny.

“I saw this at the gift shop,” she said, “and had to get it for the baby.” She smiled, eyeing Adeline’s belly. She had taken the news better than we expected, though, like I guessed, she was so happy to have Adeline back nothing else mattered.

We went down to the main level,  led by the police officer, and got into Adeline’s father’s SUV.  I sat in the back next to Addie, feeling a little nauseous from the morphine. She hooked her arm through mine as we set off to her house.

People lined the street. Adeline tensed as she watched them pass by. The car slowed, pulling into her driveway. The people pushed forward, cheering when we got out of the car. They held signs and balloons, welcoming Adeline back home. I caught a few with my name on it.

The weird feeling came back.

Adeline tucked her head down and held onto me. I wrapped my right arm around her, shielding her the best I could. Everyone meant well, but they didn’t understand. Their well wishes made us uncomfortable.

We stopped on the front porch. I turned and waved, showing our thanks. Then we went inside. The front door closed, drowning out the cheers and chanting. Adeline let out her breath and looked around the foyer.

The Miller’s house was big. We were standing in the middle of a large foyer. There was an oak staircase to one side, leading into a balcony hallway. Straight ahead, through a gallery hallway, was a kitchen. An office was to the right and the  dining room to the left. The house was modern and cluttered, nothing like the farmhouse.

I loved it.

Something clawed at the glass doors at the opposite end of the house. Adeline jerked forward, a smile breaking out on her face. Her sister rushed ahead, letting the dogs in.

Two German Shepherds thundered into the house, tails wagging so hard their whole bodies shook. They circled Adeline, ecstatic.

“You’re so big, Rhett!” she told the larger one. “You grew so much!” Rhett turned, catching sight of me. He growled.

“He’s a monster,” Arianna said, rushing forward to hold him back. “And not very friendly to strangers.”

Scarlet, Addie’s other dog, sniffed me before going back to Addie. Adeline stood, wiping away tears. She grabbed Rhett’s collar.

“Don’t strain yourself,” her father said, taking the dog. “Behave,” he said sternly to Rhett. Then he looked up at me. “He’ll warm up to you eventually.”

“Are you hungry?” Mrs. Miller asked.

“Ugh, yeah,” Addie said, standing. “I’m tired. I kind of… um…” Addie’s cheeks grew red. She fiddled with the tags on Scarlet’s collar. “Uh… I kind of want to be alone. Take everything in.”

I knew that was hard for Adeline to admit. I was proud of her for being able to say it. The therapist we had met with told us we had to make sure to let people know when we got overwhelmed, which was easier said than done. All we had done was drive home and step into the house. It didn’t seem like much. But to Addie and me, it was huge.

I could only imagine how Addie felt. She was back home, just like she had dreamed time and time again. But she was wrestling with uneasy feelings and dealing with a hell of a lot of anxiety. She told me it made her feel guilty to not want to be around her family. She knew she was expected to, but she just couldn’t handle it. If I hadn’t been so drugged up this whole time, I might have felt that way too.

Mrs. Miller hugged Addie then told us to go upstairs and rest, saying she’d bring our stuff and food up later. It pained her to say that; we knew she wanted to be with Adeline. Before we left the hospital, the therapist spoke with Addie’s family. I overheard him telling Mr. And Mrs. Miller that we needed time and space to deal with things.

I also overheard the therapist talking to the Millers about what exactly we had gone through. Mrs. Miller cried so hard she threw up. No one wants to hear about anyone being sex trafficked, let alone their own daughter.

I followed Adeline up the stairs. Pictures lined the stairwell. Most were of Addie and her sister. She was smiling in every one, green eyes sparkling. It was a side of Addie I didn’t know too well, a side I was looking forward to seeing. Adeline’s room was the first door to the right. She paused before she twisted the knob and opened the door.

“It’s just how I left it,” she whispered. Her eyes filled with tears as she looked around the room. It was painted mint green. Her bedspread and curtains were purple, giving the room a soft feeling. She had a TV on the dresser across from her bed. Next to that was a bookshelf, stacked full of books. There was another overflowing bookshelf by the window, and a dozen books lay on her nightstand. There was a bathroom attached to the bedroom; it was small and painted light yellow.

I angled my body toward her, sliding my hand around her waist. Addie turned in, raising her arms to put around my shoulders. She stopped midway, remembering I was injured, and she couldn’t hold me that way. She grabbed onto my hips instead.

“Are you tired?” she asked me. I nodded. I wasn’t sure if I was really tired or if the meds were making me feel that way, but lying down and closing my eyes sounded like a good idea. “Me too.”

I pressed my lips to hers and moved to the bed. The blankets were freshly washed and smelled like laundry detergent. I untucked them, but that small movement hurt my neck and shoulder. I didn’t mean to wince.

“I’ll do it, Jackson,” Addie said gently.

“I hate not being able to do things for you,” I blurted.

She smiled. “I know. And I love that about you, but right now you need to take it easy and rest. Besides…I like doing things for you.”

I couldn’t help but smile. I stood aside, heart feeling whole, and let her pull the blankets down. We climbed into bed; Addie helped prop my arm up with pillows. She pulled the blankets over us and snuggled as close as she could, resting her head on my chest.

“Does this hurt?” she asked and wrapped her arm around me.

“A little,” I confessed. She wasn’t heavy, but her weight pulled my shoulder in an uncomfortable way. She wiggled down farther in the bed so that her head was on my stomach.

“What about this?” she asked.

“That’s fine. Are you comfortable?” I was more concerned about her and the baby.

“I am since I’m with you,” she said and slipped her arm around me. I reached down with my right hand and stroked her hair until I fell asleep.

The next week passed in a blur. Adeline’s friends and family came to visit. There was more hugging and more crying. Everyone was so nice and patient with us, and almost everyone thanked me for saving Addie. They were curious, but no one pried or even asked us straight out what happened. And neither of us spoke about it other than to each other and the therapist we saw twice a week.

The transition was difficult to say the least. Freedom felt surreal…and scary. It was a bit like being naked. I felt exposed, vulnerable, and the lack of structure left me anxious. I thought it was ridiculous to think of my life at the farmhouse as structured, but I knew what to expect. I cooked, cleaned…got punished…but I expected it. Here, I didn’t know what to do or what to expect.  I didn’t feel useful, and that scared the hell out of me.

One thing was certain: Addie and I had each other. We stayed together. I went to Addie’s doctor appointments and she went to mine. She had a panic attack in the waiting room in the OB/GYN’s office. Being around unknown people was too much. Knowing our history, the lady behind the desk quickly whisked us away. Still, Addie was upset for hours.

We were able to talk to Lily on the phone once. She was in a hospital getting treated for several STDs and undergoing some intense therapy. There was still no word on Nate or Zane, or even Rochelle for that matter.

I wanted to believe that they would get caught eventually, or that they’d leave us alone out of fear of the unwanted attention that was on us. I had my doubts. Even though I was groggy from the pain medicine and taking something for anxiety, I still woke up in a cold sweat, twisted in the sheets, thinking I needed to protect Adeline…and now our baby.

We decided to keep the pregnancy a secret from everyone except Adeline’s family and her friend Lynn. Addie was on medicine for an overactive thyroid, and with all the stress she was under, she was considered high risk. Even though getting pregnant was the last thing either of us wanted, that little blob with a heartbeat was very much loved by us.

In all honesty, the thought of being a father freaked me the fuck out. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t even know how to function in society without a slave master breathing down my neck. Making my own choices… having free time… it was so weird it was almost uncomfortable. I felt anxious and nervous, scared to make a mistake and get punished. Would the anxiety ever go away? Could I ever function normally?

Take it day by day.

It’s what the therapist told me. It was all I could do. I was free, I was with Adeline, and we were safe.

Day by day.

Each day was a small victory. I had to remind myself that over and over as I looked around the table that very evening. Adeline’s mother made tacos for dinner. I sat uncomfortably in my chair next to Addie. My shoulder didn’t throb as much as it did two weeks ago when the injury was new, but it was still a pain in the ass to keep my arm still.

“Ugh,” Addie groaned, putting her head in her hands. I reached over and rubbed her back. She let out a breath, taking comfort in the back rub.

“Did you take the throwing up pills?” Arianna asked, setting a bowl of chips on the table.

“Yes,” Addie mumbled. “It’s not working anymore.”

“I’m sorry,” I said softly.

Addie turned her head, shooting me a look. “It’s not only your fault,” she said quietly. She sat up, only to wrinkle her nose and lean onto me, resting her head against my right shoulder. I put my arm around her waist, heart fluttering.

“Need to lay down?” her father asked, coming into the  dining room with salsa.

I tensed, my mind automatically thinking I was going to get beaten for touching Adeline. I jerked away.

“I can help with dinner,” I blurted, starting to stand.

“No, no,” Mr. Miller waved his hand. “Jackson, sit and relax. Dinner is almost ready.” He pressed a smile.

The Millers had been nothing but welcoming, but I could sense the tension. They wanted their daughter back, not their daughter plus some random guy…the same guy who knocked her up. They knew I was important to Adeline, and still thanked me for saving her. But I wasn’t stupid. I knew Addie’s mother wondered if Addie had developed some sort of dependence on me while we were captive. She didn’t love me, but needed me to survive.

As much as I hated to admit it, I wondered that too. I knew I loved her. I wanted her, needed her…she wasn’t just all I needed to find it in me to escape, she was all I needed in life. I had a purpose with her and she made my life better. Could the same be said about me?

Addie straightened up, looking into my eyes. “Stay with me,” she said, putting her hand on my thigh. Her touch sent tingles through me.

“I will,” I promised and took her hand. Several minutes later, everyone joined in at the table. Mr. And Mrs. Miller started talking about their art gallery. It took Adeline a few minutes to join in. She was relaxed around her family. I knew she wanted to feel like her old self. But she was still struggling, and I wasn’t sure anyone else could see that. Or, more likely, no one else wanted to see it.

“You’ll have to see the gallery someday,” Addie said, turning to me.

“I’d like that,” I said with a smile. I meant it, but the thought of leaving the house made me sweat.

“Do you like art?” Mr. Miller asked me.

I turned my attention to him. “Uh, yeah… I think.”

“Right,” he mumbled, embarrassed to have asked me. I didn’t know anything about art. Turns out there were a lot of normal things I didn’t know anything about. I didn’t know how to use Adeline’s Kindle, or even her laptop. I had never used an iPod, or played video games on a system built in this decade. I had no clue about celebrities or fashion or pop culture. I didn’t know what Facebook was or that most movies could be seen in 3D.

There was a lot of learning to do. I didn’t like the Kindle; I preferred the smell and feel of a printed book. Addie had lots of those; we spent our days reading in bed together.

“We take a field trip to the gallery every year,” Arianna told me. “It's fun but kind of embarrassing since my dad is in charge.” She rolled her eyes.

Mr. Miller laughed. “I didn’t embarrass you! In fact, I pretended not to even—” he cut off when the phone rang. They didn’t answer the phone during family dinners. I liked that. “I pretended not to even know you.”

Arianna shook her head. “But they still knew who you were!”

Mr. Miller laughed. “Let’s hope your little one isn’t as ornery as this one.”

Addie laughed and put her hand over her stomach. “Who knows?”

“I think it’s a girl,” Arianna said, leaning across the table.

“I’m team blue,” Mr. Miller said.

Mrs. Miller smiled. “I’m with Ari on this. It’s a girl.”

“I have no idea,” Addie said and shook her head. “It’s too early to tell. Maybe when it starts moving I’ll get a feel.” She squeezed my thigh. “What about you?”

I finished chewing my taco. “Girl,” I said with a nod. “And I think she’ll look like you.”

Adeline smiled. “She’ll have your eyes though.”

The phone rang again. Arianna stood, saying it might be important. A lot of calls from  news stations had been coming through this last week, despite the Miller’s best efforts to block them. Everyone wanted to hear our story. Arianna ignored her dad, who told her it could wait, and went into the kitchen to answer the phone. A hush fell over the table.

She returned a minute later, stunned. She held the phone out to me. “It’s for you,” she said.

“Me?” I asked incredulously. “W-who would be calling me?”

Arianna’s eyes widened. “She says she’s your mother.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

My heart skipped a beat. The words sent a shock through me. My mother? I hadn’t thought about her in years. She chose drugs and alcohol over me, gave me up to her mother who was just as bad of an addict.

“She says her name is Amber Louise Porter,” Arianna continued, looking at me. Holy fuck. That was my mother. How the hell did she get this number? And why try to contact me now, after all these years? I could only give Arianna a blank stare.

Mr. Miller stood, taking the phone from Arianna. “You don’t need to do this,” he said to me.

“I’m not,” I said. “She made her decision a long time ago. I don’t want to talk to her,” I said again, almost surprised at my resolve. I took in a breath and looked down at my plate. Visions of our old apartment flashed through my mind. The memories were buried down, deep down, under the horrors of the farmhouse. But right then, it all came rushing back to me.

The stained carpet. My mattress on the floor. The apartment smelled like mildew and smoke. I remembered the very last time I saw my mother, and remembered trying to wake her as she laid passed out on the couch.

My heart raced and I was dizzy. I closed my eyes and took a breath. I wasn’t there. I wasn’t in the apartment. I was here, in the  dining room of the Miller’s house next to Adeline. I opened my eyes and saw Mr. Miller nod and step out of the room.

“Are you sure?” Addie asked.

I turned to her, raising an eyebrow. “Yes,” I said. Then I remembered my mother on the floor, blood dripping down her face. She opened her arms for me and I ran to her, crying. I took comfort in her hug, in the way her hair smelled like wildflowers. She was my mother. She loved me. She had tried.

No. Just…no.

I closed my eyes. How many times had I gone to bed hungry or cold? How many times did I clean vomit out of her hair and sit in the living room thinking she was dead?

I ground my jaw, fighting back emotion. I was there, sitting on the living room floor, clutching Pedro the stuffed dragon and watching cartoons. Mom sat behind me, tearing open a box of cereal for us to share. Then she was passed out, face down in a puddle of puke.

I stood from the table, suddenly angry. Why would she do this? I had come so far. I was getting used to things, finally moving on. Who was she to storm back into my life? I blinked back my emotion and went upstairs.

Rhett followed close behind me, almost tripping me. My left arm was still in the stupid sling. Anger burned inside of me. I heard Addie talking downstairs, asking her mom what she should do. Mrs. Miller suggested she give me a few minutes alone to process what had happened before coming to find me.

I went into Addie’s room. I guess it was our room now. I had my own section in the closet, and half the drawers in the dresser were filled with items that belonged to me. I sat on the bed, taking in a slow, steady breath.

Mrs. Miller was more of a mother to me in the last two weeks than my own mother ever was. She welcomed me, made sure I was comfortable, and took care of me. She cared.

Didn’t my own mother? She did, didn’t she? Deep down, I felt it wasn’t her fault. That she was born that way, raised by her own mother who had problems. It wasn’t an excuse. I took another breath, eyes settling on a framed black and white photo. I strode across the room to pick it up.

I looked at the white blob that was my child. I hoped with all my heart it would have a good life. I envisioned myself with our baby. That’s when I knew I no longer wanted to be Jackson Porter.

For too long I had been a victim. I had taken the abuse; I had let it break me to the point where it almost killed me. Then I met Addie, and everything changed.

She had saved me. She showed me life was worth living. It was only with Adeline that I was able to feel love, love so strong it had to physically manifest, and through that a child was created.

I wanted to continue on. I wanted a better life. Not just for me, but for our child, for Addie. She was my saving grace, and I owed it to her to put everything I had into moving forward, no matter how hard that seemed. It was all I could do, right?

I could let the past consume me, wallowing in self-pity and blaming everyone else for my problems. Or I could accept them and move forward, growing stronger from every adversity that I had faced.

And throughout the last ten years, I’d fucking faced a lot.

I set the  ultrasound picture down just as the door opened. Adeline stepped into the room, concern muddled on her face.

“Jackson,” she started, closing the door behind her and hurrying over. She wrapped her arms around me. “Are you okay?”

“Yes,” I said, hugging her back. I rested my head on hers. “I am. It just… just caught me off guard.”

“I didn’t know…” she started. I knew what she was going to say. She didn’t know anything about my mother. For all Addie knew, my mother was dead. I never spoke about her.

“She’s the reason I ended up with my grandma,” I said, the words slipping out of me. “She got arrested one too many times and lost custody of me. She never tried to get me back. And she obviously never tried to find me over the years.”

Adeline reached up, putting her hand on my face. “I’m so sorry.”

I shook my head. “Don’t be. Don’t waste any time or feelings on her. She’s not worth it.”

“But she’s your mother.”

I bent my head down, pressing my forehead against Addie’s. “She is. But she was never a mom. I don’t get why she’d contact me now.” I let out a snort. “She probably wants the reward money.” The six figure reward that was offered for Adeline’s safe return was given to us, to use as a way to start a new life.

I didn’t know my mother anymore, but I knew people who were addicted to drugs. I knew the drive, the need to get another fix, and the willingness to do anything to get that fix. Including hitting up your long lost son for money. Besides the money, Addie and I had become famous in a weird way. She showed me, just one time, what happened when she searched our names on the Internet. The public was horrified at what happened to us, and were baffled at how someone—me—could go missing for over ten years and no one notice.

When we read over an article that chastised us for not running when we had the chance, Addie closed her computer. People didn’t get it. They didn’t get the fear, the threats, or how it felt to be beaten down until you really believed you were nothing. And I wasn’t going to explain it.

Adeline took my hand and led me to the bed. We sat down next to each other. Adeline wrapped her arms around my waist and hooked her leg over mine. I held her against me, careful not to bump my injured shoulder. Being here with Addie made things better already.

“I think it’s okay if you want to talk to her,” she said. “But maybe you should wait until we’re with Dr. Eichen.”

I nodded. “Good idea.” I didn’t want to talk to my mother in front of anyone, but having the therapist there couldn’t hurt. “Want to go back down and finish dinner?”

“Only if you do.”

“I should eat,” she said, leaning forward and resting her head against me. Her hand slid from my waist to my back, her fingers edging under the hem of my shirt. Her skin was warm against mine. We had yet to be intimate together since our escape. Having a shattered collarbone didn’t make it easy.

I wrapped my arm around her, pulling her in. She turned her head up and kissed me. I pushed my tongue into her mouth, forgetting about everything. She ran her hands down my sides and to my thighs. Blood rushed to my dick in a warm rush. I exhaled and slipped my hand up the back of her shirt, fingers hovering over the clasp of her bra. She bent her head and pressed her lips to my neck, sucking at my skin.

A wave of desire hardened my cock. I wanted to be inside of Adeline. I eyed the door. It wasn’t locked. What if her family heard us? Would they be mad at me? Kick me out?

“Jackson?” she asked. “What’s wrong? Am I hurting you?”

“No,” I said, stroking her hair. “I, uh, don’t want to get caught.”

Her cheeks reddened. “Me neither.” She sighed and I took her hand. “We’re always going to worry, aren’t we?”

I half smiled. “Seems like it. Though, this time it’s different. No one will kill me.”

Addie frowned at my joke. “I want to be better,” she whispered.

“You will be,” I promised her. “You’re doing well now.”

I felt her head move against me as she nodded. “So are you.”

“That’s debatable,” I said.

“No, it’s not.” She locked eyes with me. “I don’t know how I would do this if I didn’t have you.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “Same here.”

“I’m getting hungry,” she said with a smile. “It’s so weird to be hungry and nauseous at the same time.”

“I bet,” I said and extended my hand to help Addie to her feet. Hand in hand, we went back to dinner.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

“Do you guys want to go to dinner with us?” Lynn, Addie’s best friend, asked. She leaned back on the living room couch and fiddled with the end of her long, blonde hair, which was in a braid. “Luke got reservations at the new fancy restaurant downtown.”

My nerves prickled. Nate used to own a fancy restaurant in Des  Moines. I guessed it was still his. I wondered what happened to it and the people who worked there. I hadn’t thought about all the people who weren’t trafficked that Nate fucked over.

“Uh,” Addie started, looking at me. I could see the panic in her eyes. We had been free for almost three months. While her friends and family were still patient and understanding, they were ready for us to be normal again.

But we weren’t.

“Maybe next time,” I said and felt Adeline relax. “I’m sore from physical therapy,” I added. I flicked my eyes to Lynn and forced a smile.

“That’s okay,” she said without missing a beat. She smiled and tossed her braid over her shoulder. “You know I love going to dinner. Hey, maybe later this week we can pick something up and bring it here.” She smiled at Adeline like it was no big deal, but I saw it. I hope Addie didn’t.

It was the same hasn’t-it-been-long-enough stare we’d been getting a lot lately. We’d done well, our therapist assured us, despite our issues. Only a few weeks into our sessions, I was diagnosed with PTSD and general anxiety.

“I’d like that better,” Adeline said, subconsciously rubbing her middle.

“Are you getting excited?” Lynn asked, moving her eyes to Adeline’s growing belly. I always thought Adeline was beautiful, and being pregnant only made her glow more. She was seventeen weeks along, and while it was obvious she was pregnant to us, to anyone else, it might look like she had eaten too much. Addie was still scared that people would find out about the baby and word would get out to Zane, and he’d come racing here in a flurry of rage.

“I am,” Addie said and took my hand. “And a little nervous. I hope everything is okay.” She patted her stomach. She was getting another  ultrasound tomorrow, and as long as the baby was in the right position, we would be able to find out what we were having.

I slowly put my left arm around her. I really was sore from physical therapy. That hadn’t been a lie. The shattered collarbone had healed, but I had a long road of recovery ahead of me. I was determined to get all functioning back in my left shoulder and arm. I wanted to do it for Adeline, and for our baby. “I still think it’s a girl.”

“Me too,” Lynn agreed. “I’m good at guessing these things. It’s like I’m psychic.”

The smile vanished from Adeline’s face.

“Did I say something wrong?” Lynn asked, color draining from her cheeks.

“No,” Adeline breathed, shaking her head. “It just…just…”

“It reminded her of something,” I finished. I blinked, pulled Addie closer to me as I thought back. What did that have to do with anything? Adeline closed her eyes. Oh, right.

Lily.

I remembered that stupid card game she liked to play. She was convinced she was psychic. Lily hadn’t done too well since our escape. She acted out and got kicked out of three foster homes. She spent a month in a residential psych hospital before she went to another family.

Though this time, I thought it would work out. She was with a family who was familiar with fostering children, but closed their home years ago after adopting three girls. They made an exception for Lily because of me.

The Lunsford’s had been my last foster family before my grandmother took me. They were the only other family besides the Millers who made me feel welcome. We had gone to visit Lily, but dealing with the past wasn’t something I was ready to do. Adeline kept in touch with her via email instead.

“I’m fine,” Addie said, faking a smile. “Really.” She nodded. “And I’m very ex—oh! It’s kicking!”

Lynn leaned forward and put her hand where Adeline’s had been. “I feel it!” she exclaimed. “Ah, it’s so weird. Doesn’t that freak you out to know there is a little person inside of you?”

Addie laughed. “Sometimes. But most of the time it makes me happy.” She turned to me, smiling. I tightened my arm around her shoulders.

Lynn wrinkled her nose. “It freaks me out,” she laughed. “No babies for me for a long time if I can help it!”

She and Addie talked about baby names; we still hadn’t picked anything out. About an hour later, Lynn left to go home and do her homework. Adeline and I went back into the living room. Evening sunlight poured in the large windows at the front of the house. The living room was large, filled with oversized furniture, artwork on every wall, and an overfilled bookshelf. Addie wasn’t the only one in her family who loved to read.

“What’s wrong?” I asked when Addie sank onto the couch with tears in her eyes.

“School,” she said, her bottom lip trembling as she tried not to cry.

“Addie,” I said and sat next to her. “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.” She shook her head and tears rolled down her cheeks. “Maybe I should have tried harder, gone for more than a week.”

“You did try,” I soothed. She wanted to go back to school that fall. Going away was too much stress, so she tried a local community college instead. People knew who we were. It was odd, being famous like this. We both hated it. The questions, stares, and whispers were too much for her and Addie dropped her classes.

“I’m so proud of you for trying,” I told her, pulling her close. She wrapped her arms around my neck. “You are still the strongest person I know.”

The smile slowly returned to her face. “And you are the strongest person I know.”

I kissed her. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” she whispered. Then she shook her head. “I want a normal life for us. And for our child.  He or she deserves one.”

“I think what we have now is pretty good,” I confessed. It was the best I’d ever had.

Addie put her hands on my chest. “Day by day, right?”

“Right.”

I tipped her chin up to mine. She stuck her hand under my sleeve, feeling the bullet wound scar. I brought my face to hers for a kiss. I slipped my tongue through her lips, tasting her. Addie’s arms went around me, pulling us close. Finding ways to comfortably make love had been a challenge. First it was my injuries and now it was awkward finding positions with Adeline’s belly.

We settled on our sides, facing each other. It was still painful to lift my left arm too high. I rested my hand on her hip. She wrapped her arms around me, keeping her fingers hovering over a scar.

And then we were kissing again, each kiss getting deeper and more passionate than the last. I was getting turned on—fast. Adeline moved her hands from my sides to my stomach, tracing the diagonal scar that went down across my abdomen. Her fingers lingered on the button of my jeans before she undid it.

I let out a deep breath and shifted my weight, allowing Adeline to stick her hand inside my pants. Her hand found my dick, hard with want. She slid her hand up and down my shaft. I closed my eyes.

Then the front door opened.

Addie gasped and looked up. Arianna and Mrs. Miller bustled through the door with shopping bags. They stopped dead in their tracks, staring at us. Mrs. Miller’s eyes were wide. I was sure she fought her maternal instinct to tell us to separate. But instead she laughed and turned Arianna around, pushing her into the foyer.

I had to give Mrs. Miller credit. She was trying very hard to respect our privacy as a couple and understand that being intimate was vital in being ‘normal’ again.

Sex became more enjoyable every time. It was healing and made us both feel like we were getting a piece of ourselves back. It was something we both wanted, and it was more than physical between us. Of course, sex felt good, really good. It went beyond that for us, though. It was about connecting and healing, and doing something normal young adults do.

Addie sat up, putting her head in her hands. I zipped my pants and let out a breath. I ran my hand through my hair, which had finally been cut, and looked at Addie.

“Want to watch a movie?” she asked me. I nodded and stood, tugging at my pants. She flicked her eyes down and smiled. “I’ll meet you upstairs. I’ll go say hi to my mom.”

“Okay. Want me to pick something out?”

“Yeah. Surprise me.”

I smiled. “I can do that.” I awkwardly hurried up the stairs and into our room. Addie joined me a few minutes later and we fell asleep watching Gone with the Wind…for the tenth time.

“Oh my god, Addie, just tell us!” Arianna said, bouncing in her seat  the next day. Adeline and I had just returned from the  ultrasound, and we knew the sex of our baby. It was surreal—again—to see that little thing on the screen. This time we saw arms and legs, fingers and toes. We even saw the baby suck its thumb.

I left feeling more than disoriented. We still had time to adjust. And we would. I knew that together, I could get through anything.

Being a father terrified me. What if I wasn’t any good at it? What if our child didn’t like me? I didn’t know what to do. I’d never held a baby before in my life. Thinking about taking care of a baby made my heart race. I was still getting used to the fact that I could get in a car and drive somewhere I wanted to go.  I sat at the table, head spinning.

“Not yet!” Addie said, smiling. She was just as nervous as I was, but her maternal instinct must have kicked in. Knowing what we were having clicked something into place for her, and Addie said she already felt like a mother. “Lynn’s not even here yet.”

“Lynn is always late,” Arianna sighed.

“Be patient,” Mr. Miller said, sitting down. “But feel free to tell us,” he added with a wink.

Addie smiled and shook her head. “You have to wait until I cut the cake.”

I made a cake and dyed the inside of it for a gender reveal. The idea of a gender reveal party was weird to me. Mrs. Miller suggested it, and Addie thought it would be fun. Doing normal stuff like this was different…and I liked it. Addie and I were still struggling, still having flashbacks and nightmares, but we didn’t let that stop us from living. It took effort sometimes to enjoy the little things, and even more to enjoy big things like this.

Day by day.

That’s what we were doing. Taking each thing as it came to us, getting over obstacles together. Nothing was taken for granted anymore.

Several minutes later, Lynn arrived. Everyone crowded around the table. Addie stood and picked up a knife. I could tell she was nervous to have all eyes on her. I stood behind her, putting my hand on her back. She stuck the knife into the cake, quickly cutting a large piece. She plopped it on a plate and held it up for her family to see.

“A girl!” her mother cried excitedly. “I knew it!”

A smile broke across my face and I relaxed. Happy chatter broke out amongst the Millers and everyone started suggesting girl names and nursery themes. We ate the cake and things seemed almost normal, like this was supposed to happen all along.

Later that night, Adeline and I laid down in bed. I was rubbing her shoulders and thinking about the future and our daughter.

“Do you want to get married?” I blurted as the thought crossed my mind. “Someday, I mean,” I added quietly.

Adeline turned around, eyes locking with mine. “I do. I do want to marry you,” she said with a smile.

I flushed and looked down. Then I enveloped Adeline in my arms. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to go about doing this, Addie. I love you and want to be with you forever. I will always protect you and I will always love you.”

“Then let’s do it,” she said. “Let’s get married.”

I smiled. “When?”

“I don’t care. Soon. The sooner the better.”

“Do you want a big wedding?” I asked. I didn’t know what went on at weddings either. I knew they cost a lot; I’d heard enough talk about budget when clients bought the girls for bachelor parties.

“I used to,” she said honestly. “But not anymore. For one, being around that many people…” she trailed off and shuddered. “No way. And it’s just not important anymore. I want a normal life for us, for our family, and I want to be happy. A big wedding isn’t going to impact that.”

I hugged her tight. “I love you,” I told her again.

“I love you too.” She yawned and laid back down. I spooned my body around hers, feeling content.

Well, until the doorbell rang. We shot up. It was late. Who was ringing the doorbell now? Scarlet and Rhett barked, racing to the door. Adeline clung onto me. I protectively held her for a few seconds.

“Stay here,” I said, standing up.

“Jackson, no!” she cried, reaching for me. “Don’t leave me!”

My eyebrows pushed together. “I have to keep you safe,” I said, feeling like I was back in the farmhouse. “Stay here,” I repeated and slipped out the door. I hurried down the hall. My heart pounded and red-hot fear washed through me when I saw the police officer standing in the foyer talking to Mr. Miller.

The police officer’s eyes met mine. He smiled. “I thought you should be the first to know,” he said to me. “We got ‘em. We caught Nate and Zane.”

CHAPTER THIRTY

I linked my fingers through Adeline’s. She closed her eyes, turning her head, and groaning in pain. I clenched my jaw.

“Breathe,” I said, feeling like a hypocrite. I wasn’t breathing.

She squeezed my hand, writhing in pain. She tensed for a minute then relaxed.

“You’re doing great,” I told her, standing to move her hair out of her eyes. I looked at the monitors, not knowing what any of the squiggly lines meant.

“Was that long? It felt like it?”

“Yeah,” I said. “About a minute.”

“Damn,” she breathed causing me to laugh. It was just after sunset on this spring day, and Adeline was in labor. “At least I can—” she cut off as another contraction rolled through her. “I want the epidural now,” she said through clenched teeth.

I pressed the call button for the nurse to come in, who then told us it would be a few minutes until Adeline would get pain relief. I ran my fingers through her hair and rubbed her back, doing my best to comfort her.

Half an hour later, Adeline was sitting up in bed with a smile on her face. “This is much better,” she said. “I should have done this from the start.”

“I’m glad you’re not in pain anymore,” I said, hooking my arm around her. She rested her head on my shoulder. Her parents, sister, and Lynn were in the waiting room at the end of the hall. Addie didn’t want anyone else in the room with her when she gave birth besides me.

“Me too,” she said and turned to look at the monitors. “I wish I knew what it meant.”

“It’s good,” I assured her. “If it wasn’t, the nurse would be in here.”

She nodded and closed her eyes. “Are you tired, Jackson?”

“No,” I said. “You have to be though. It’s been eight hours.”

“I’m exhausted.”

“Get some sleep while you can,” I told her.

She scooted over on the bed. “Stay with me?”

“I will,” I promised and sat next to her. Addie held my hand and closed her eyes. I turned on the TV, flipping through channels once Adeline had fallen asleep. I stopped at a news channel, my heart skipping a beat. The familiar faces of Nate and Zane flashed before me. I pressed my thumb down on the remote, changing the channel. I didn’t want Addie to wake up and see their faces. It was bad enough we had spent yesterday in court.

The trial was far from over. Things didn’t happen like they did in the movies. The legal system took its sweet ass time, dragging out the process and making it miserable for people like us.

I would never forget the first time Addie and I walked into the courtroom to testify. Zane was in the front, hands cuffed behind his back. Adeline was wearing a pink sweater dress that showed off her pregnant belly.

Hand in hand, we walked down the aisle to the front row. Zane didn’t notice us at first. It gave me a second to look him over. His dark hair was a mess and he hadn’t shaved in days. Maybe it was to cover up the burn on his cheek, the burn Addie had given him when she pressed the hot curling iron to his face. Or maybe he wasn’t allowed to shave in prison.

Zane glared at us, eyes narrowing just like before. As soon as our gazes met, I wanted to shrivel and hide. I blinked. I wanted to beat the ever-living shit out him. I took a breath. I wanted a good life for my family, and starting a fight in the courtroom wasn’t a good start.

Zane moved his eyes off of me to Adeline. That’s when he noticed she was pregnant… and that her hand was firmly in mine. Her left hand rested on her swollen belly, light reflecting off her diamond wedding ring. We had gotten married just a month before the trial started. I could feel Zane’s anger from across the room. His face grew deep red. Then he jerked forward, pushing past the guards. I put myself between him and Adeline, ready to protect her and our baby.

I didn’t have to; the police got to him before he made it over the bench. I had kept a hold on Addie, and together we enjoyed watching Zane get man handled by the cops.

I let out a breath and shook my head to clear it. I didn’t want to think about Zane now. I turned the TV off and closed my eyes, drifting to sleep for a few minutes until the nurse came back to check Addie.

It wasn’t long before it was time for her to start pushing. I held her hand, staying up by her head.

“Dad,” the nurse said, flicking her eyes to me. “The baby is crowning, do you want to see?”

I stared at Addie, wide eyed. I didn’t want to see that. Nope. Never. Well… maybe. I peeked. I kind of wished I hadn’t. But… I had to look.

“She has hair!” I said to Addie. Holy fucking shit. This was our baby. This was our baby’s hair that I was seeing!

“One more push!” the doctor said. I tightly held on to Adeline’s hand, unable to look away now. “One more, one more!”

Addie squeezed my fingers, closing her eyes. I watched our daughter be born. She was so little, with pink skin and enough wavy, dark hair to cover her entire head. A second of silence went by before she opened her mouth and cried.

The doctor wrapped the baby in a blanket and put her on Adeline’s chest. Tears pricked the corner of my eyes and I was overcome by emotion. Addie held the little bundle close to her, crying tears of joy.

“Oh my god,” she stammered, looking at our baby. “She’s… she’s perfect! Hi, sweetheart,” Addie said, tears rolling down her face. “This is your mommy and daddy. I love you so much already, Grace.”

I could only nod and put my hand on the baby. Suddenly, everything fell into place. I was standing there, with my wife and our brand new baby.

Our life wasn’t ideal. Addie and I still struggled. But we were making it. We were trying, every day. We were happy, and now we were a family. And we always would be.

And that’s all I need.

Read the first chapter of STAY, Adeline’s story that inspired the companion novel ALL I NEED

CHAPTER ONE

Just one more chapter. I rolled my eyes and closed the book, smiling at the lie I had repeatedly told myself. It was almost four in the morning, but pulling the almost all-nighter was worth it to finish the latest book in one of my favorite fantasy series. My eyes burned and begged to be closed. I rested the book against my chest and thought about the cliffhanger ending, sorting through my mixed emotions of anger and excitement.

I turned my bedside light off and rolled over, feeling slightly sad that I had read through the book so quickly. I closed my eyes and tried to shut off my mind; I had to get up in just over three hours and I had a long day ahead of me. The cheerful chirping of birds outside my window was as unwelcome as the muted glow of dawn that filtered in through the sheer purple curtains.

My thoughts were still tangled with dragons and Rangers dressed in black furs when I finally drifted to sleep, only to be rudely awoken by the blaring alarm clock. Ugh, not yet.

I rolled over and slapped the snooze button—twice—before I forced myself out of bed. I dragged my feet as I crossed my room, stumbling into the bathroom to begin the time consuming ritual of making myself look halfway presentable.

I turned on the shower and inspected myself in the mirror as the water warmed up. Circles clung under my eyes, and my shoulder length brown hair was a tangled mess around my face.

Whatever.

I waved my hand at my sloppy reflection. It wasn’t anything a shower and a little makeup couldn’t fix.

Tired, I stayed in the shower too long, enjoying the steamy hot water. I got out, dried my hair and put on the least amount of makeup that was socially acceptable for an outing with my friends.

“Addie?” Arianna, my younger sister, called from across the hall.

“Yeah?” I answered and bent down to pet Scarlet and Rhett, my German Shepherds who were sleeping on a pile of dirty laundry I had thrown on the floor.

“Can you help me do my makeup? I keep messing it up,” Arianna replied, sounding annoyed.

“Sure, come here.” I told her. It took every ounce of self-control I had not to laugh when she walked into my room. Black eyeliner was smeared across her face, and eye shadow powdered her cheeks just under her eyes. I brought her into the small bathroom that was attached to my room and put the lid down on the toilet for her to sit on.

“Hold still,” I told her while I cleaned up her face. Ari looked a lot like me: high cheekbones and green eyes with a nose that was a hair too straight, and cheeks that caused dimples to form when we smiled. I lightly dusted her eyelids with shadow and drew a very thin line of black liner over her top lashes. “There,” I said when I was done.

“Thanks.” She looked in the mirror. “I wish I was good at doing makeup.” She wrinkled her nose.

“I wasn’t good at makeup when I was thirteen. And you’re good at doing hair,” I reminded her with a smile. “Speaking of, I need to dry mine.”

“Hurry up!” She scuttled out of the bathroom. “Don’t make us late!”

I rolled my eyes and ran a brush through my hair. Lynn would make us late. Lynn-time was generally a half hour behind real-time, hence why I told her to meet us at my parent’s house at nine when I really wanted to leave at nine-thirty. And, like I predicted, I was done, ready, and waiting by the time my best friend arrived.

I grabbed my purse, double-checked that I had my cell phone, and led the way to the door. “Bye Dad!” I called before I opened the garage door.

“Are you leaving?” Dad asked from inside his office.

“Yeah.” The floor creaked as Dad walked down the hall. He hugged Arianna and me goodbye. “Drive safe and call me when you get there. And have fun at whatever you’re going to.”

“The Pride Parade.” I smiled.

“Yeah, that.” He and shook his head. “You kids are getting too liberal,” he mused.

I jingled my keys. “And you are too old fashioned,” I countered. “Besides, you like Matt. Don’t you want me to go support him?”

Dad nodded. “I do like him. He’s a good kid. You’re going to his house after the parade, correct?”

“Yup,” I replied. “And yes, his parents are home.” I rolled my eyes. “Good thing because it’s not like I spent a whole year living on my own at college or anything.”

Dad ignored the snark. “Watch out for your sister and don’t be out too late. Have fun. And call me when you get there.”

“We will,” I promised. “Love you!” I hurried out the door and unlocked my car. I rolled down the windows and cranked the air conditioning before we all piled in.

"Are you and Dillon gonna double date with me and Luke tomorrow?” Lynn asked as she raked her fingers through her wet hair.

“Maybe.” I’d have to come up with some real excuse. Saying I wanted to stay in to finish a book had been my reason for skipping out on a double date the weekend before.

“Maybe?” Lynn echoed. “Try not to die from excitement, Addie.”

“I’ll try and contain myself.”

“Oh come on! Just give Dillon a chance. It would be so perfect if you dated my boyfriend’s best friend!”

“I know,” I agreed. “And this will be the third chance I’ve given him.” Dillon was a nice guy. He was outgoing, like Lynn and Luke, and attractive. But he didn’t like books and said reading was boring. It would never work between us.

“You could at least use him for the night,” Lynn added. “You know what happens after the third date.”

I considered it for a second then shook my head. “I can’t do that to him … or me. I have higher standards for myself than that.”

“Your loss,” she said with a shrug and threw her blonde hair over her shoulder. “If I wasn’t with Luke, I’d tap that.”

I laughed. “You’re so full of shit, Lynn.”

She looked at me innocently then laughed too.

“What are you talking about?” Arianna piped up from the back seat. “What happens on the third date? I think I know. Isn’t that when you—”

“Nothing happens,” I interrupted. Ari was too young for this. “Nothing fun.”

“You have an odd definition of ‘fun,’” Lynn teased. I glared at her.

“Are you talking about boys?” Ari asked, suddenly more interested. "You know Addie secretly hopes to find some Prince Charming type of guy, like in one of her books."

"It's not so secret," Lynn said with a laugh.

"So," I said, changing the subject to our planned trip to Wizard World in Chicago later in the summer. I hated talking about my relationships—or lack there of—with Lynn. It made me depressed, and it wasn’t that I wasn’t looking. Honestly, I felt like there would never be anyone right for me. Maybe I was holding out for my knight in shining armor and didn’t want to admit it to myself. “We need to decide on a theme for our costumes ASAP. Batman characters or Disney princesses? Personally, I’d go with Batman.” We talked about our costumes and the rest of the fun stuff we had planned for the summer, making the long drive to the city go by quickly.

We parked and got out, taking a few minutes to fix our hair. I grabbed my cell phone and called Dad as we shuffled into the flow of people headed toward the parade.

“Matt said to meet him at the end,” Lynn informed us. “And,” she continued, scrolling through her text messages, “it ends on Mackinoff Drive. So let’s go a block before that. We can still see the parade and then easily find him.”

“Good idea,” I affirmed and let her lead the way. The further we got from the heart of the festival, the more run-down the buildings became. The street sides were hardly occupied so far down; we easily found a spot and sat down on a bench while we waited. I stretched my long legs out, wanting to soak up as much sun as possible before I was beach-bound tomorrow for Lynn’s family’s annual Memorial Day cook out. Next to Lynn, who went to the tanning salon four times a week, I was ghostly pale. I had intended on going tanning a few times with her, but I had spent my 'fun money' allowance on books. I pushed my sunglasses low on my nose, trying to avoid an awkward tan line.

I saw a blur of black out of the corner of my eye. It was moving fast and headed right toward the street that ran perpendicular to the one we were on. It wasn’t blocked off for the parade. I whipped my head around to see a girl race into the street, jumping off the sidewalk with such haste that she didn’t take the time to see if the coast was clear.

A horn blared and tires squealed as a car slammed on its breaks. Holy shit. My heart skipped a beat. The car missed her by just a foot. It wasn’t going fast being so close to the parade route, but it was fast enough to cause some damage.

“Did you see that?” Lynn stood and put her hand to her face, shading her eyes. “That was close. Dumbass isn’t looking where’s she’s going.”

“I think she’s crying.” I narrowed my eyes, watching her race across the street. She kept her head down and her arms wrapped around her chest. It was odd to see her in a long sleeved sweater in eighty-degree weather. When she was parallel to us, she whirled around, looking behind her as if she was scared of being followed. Whatever she saw made her pick up the pace. She dodged behind a building and out of sight. My eyes lingered in her direction, waiting to see if anyone else would accompany her down the alley.

I shook my head and turned back to Lynn and my sister, making lazy conversation and enjoying the sun. I was hot by the time the distant music and cheering from the parade floated down the block, and I had already drained my water bottle. I stood, told Arianna and Lynn I’d be right back, and dashed across the street to use the bathroom. I pushed my way through the crowded coffee shop and impatiently waited in line for the single stall bathroom.

When I was done, I left the ladies room and held my purse close to my body, prepared to side-step my way through the crowded cafe once again. But then I saw the back door. I looked at the crowded cafe and decided I’d rather go through the alley than wade my way through all the people. I put my hand on the knob and twisted, hoping an emergency alarm wouldn’t sound. Luckily it didn’t, and I emerged into the alley behind the coffee shop.

Then I saw her, the crying girl who almost got hit by a car, slumped over next to a dumpster. I froze, unsure of what to do. I knew it wasn't any of my business. She probably didn't want to be bothered anyway. But then I noticed the blood.

My heart pounded and my breath rushed out of me. “Are you okay?” I asked, my voice meek. I doubted the crying girl even heard me. I swallowed and asked again.

Slowly, she lifted her head, revealing a black eye and a fat lip. “Go,” she croaked and wiped her bloody nose.

“Oh my God,” I blurted and assumed she had been mugged. “I’ll help you,” I said and started to move in her direction. “I'll call the police." Just then, someone walked down the alley. I jerked my head up, heart racing. The young man slowed his gait when he saw me. Despite my fear, I couldn’t help but notice his extreme attractiveness. A black t-shirt stretched over his broad shoulders, tight enough to show off his muscular chest and arms. The perfect amount of stubble covered his face from his defined cheekbones to his strong jaw. Carefully tousled hair fell just above his beautiful blue eyes.

“Help!” I said. “I...I think she’s been mugged.” I shook my head, hands shaking. “ I don’t know what happened but she’s bleeding. She needs help!”

Another guy stopped short, staying behind the guy with the blue eyes. He was tall and robust with a head full of wavy, black hair that fell an inch below his ears. His eyes were a dark chocolate brown, and his full lips were pulled into a frown. His dark eyes flicked from me, to the girl, and then to the guy in front of him. They widened with fear, and he opened his mouth as if in warning when Blue Eyes elbowed him in the ribs.

“It’s okay,” Blue Eyes said and held up his hands, flashing me a smile. “I’m going to help her, don’t worry.” He took a step forward, and the crying girl picked up a handful of gravel and sprang to her feet.

"Go!" she yelled and threw it at Blue Eyes. His handsome face twisted into something hateful, and he lunged forward with alarming speed. His hands struck the girl on the shoulders, shoving her back into the dumpster. Her head hit, resounding against the metal, and she slid back down onto the ground. My fear turned into terror. Those guys weren’t going to help her. They were the ones who hurt her.

My pulse rose, and I scrambled to stick my hand into my purse, feeling around for my phone. I whirled around at the same time in a desperate attempt to get back inside the safety of the crowded coffee shop and call the police. I diverted my eyes when I felt the familiar rectangle of my phone, needing to look at the screen to unlock it.

I put my phone to my ear and reached for the door handle. My fingers graced the worn knob when he grabbed my wrist. His nails dug into my flesh as he jerked me forward. My feet caught on themselves and I toppled over, cutting my knees on the dirty alley ground. The phone flew from my grip and clattered on the pavement.

I caught a glimpse of the guy with the dark hair holding onto the crying girl. His body was rigid and his brown eyes were opened wide as he watched my struggle. The muffled voice of the 911 operator floated into the air.

"Help!" I screamed.

Blue Eyes kicked me in the side, causing me to fall flat on my face. Music from the parade began to grow louder. "Help me!" I called again. My cries were drowned out by the roaring cheers coming from the crowd. I stretched out my arm, frantically slapping at the ground in a desperate attempt to reach my phone. Bits of glass and tiny pieces of asphalt stuck to my palm. I drew my legs up underneath me and pushed myself forward and away from Blue Eyes. I planted my feet on the ground and sprang up, only to be knocked down again.

Blue Eyes laughed and walked around me. His intense eyes met mine before his foot came crashing down on my phone. The case cracked from the force. The screen shattered and little rhinestones popped off and rolled away. He stomped on it once more before picking up the broken device and throwing it into the dumpster.

Little droplets of blood pooled around the torn skin on my hands. Blue Eyes stepped over to me again, though when he kicked me, I grabbed his ankle and pulled. I imagined he'd fall, we'd struggle, and I'd get away.

But he was strong, so much stronger than me. He yanked his foot up and out of my grasp. Grit fell from his shoes onto my face and into my eyes. Involuntarily blinking, I recoiled. I pressed my blood-covered hands onto the hot pavement and pushed myself up. I opened my watering eyes. My vision was blurry. Then something struck my head, right above my left eye. The clanging of cymbals echoed from the street. The sun was suddenly sickeningly hot. An instant wave of dizziness coursed through me. Gravel crunched under the soles of Blue Eyes' shoes. The last thing I remembered was his fist making contact with my face.

STAY is available now. Get it now by clicking here.

About the Author

Emily Goodwin is the author of the bestselling Contagium Series published by Permuted Press as well as many independently published novels. She holds multiple degrees in psychology and nursing and has worked in mental health and general healthcare. Emily resides in Indiana with her husband, daughter, and German Shepherd named Vader. Along with writing, Emily enjoys riding her horse, designing and making costumes, and Cosplay. You can visit her online at emilygoodwinbooks.com.

Table of Contents

- Copyright
- Other books by Emily Goodwin:
- Author’s Note:
- CHAPTER ONE
- CHAPTER TWO
- CHAPTER THREE
- CHAPTER FOUR
- CHAPTER FIVE
- CHAPTER SIX
- CHAPTER SEVEN
- CHAPTER EIGHT
- CHAPTER NINE
- CHAPTER TEN
- CHAPTER ELEVEN
- CHAPTER TWLEVE
- CHAPTER THIRTEEN
- CHAPTER FOURTEEN
- CHAPTER FIFTEEN
- CHAPTER SIXTEEN
- CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
- CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
- CHAPTER NINETEEN
- CHAPTER TWENTY
- CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
- CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
- CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
- CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
- CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
- CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
- CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
- CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
- CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
- CHAPTER THIRTY

- Read the first chapter of STAY, Adeline’s story that inspired the companion novel ALL I NEED

- About the Author