Twisted World: A Broken World Novel
Date: 2016-09-23 04:00:00+00:00
Keywords: Zombies; Horror; Apocalyptic; Romance; Dystopia; Post Apocalyptic; New Adult; Science Fiction; Fantasy; Survival
Description: Twenty years ago a deadly virus swept the globe, ravaging the population. People died and came back as monsters, and through the tragedy that rocked the world survivors were born. Megan James is the product of survivors. Her parents crossed hundreds of miles of dangerous countryside to reach Atlanta, and the promise of a real future. Now, two decades later, Meg is facing a crisis of her own. Her father has vanished and is presumed dead, and her mom is teetering on the edge of insanity, but all Meg really wants is to return to the safe world she always thought she was living in. Only Atlanta is

TWISTED MEMORIES

TWISTED BOOK TWO

KATE L. MARY

This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are fictitious or have been used fictitiously, and are not to be construed as real in any way. Any resemblance to person, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.

Cover Art by Kate L. Mary

Copyright © 2017 by Kate L. Mary

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

This book is dedicated to Angus James.

You’ve been the most enjoyable character to shape, mold, torture, and redeem. Thanks for coming to life so perfectly in my head.

CONTENTS

1. Angus James

2. Vivian

3. Jim

4. Dr. Helton

5. Joshua

6. Vivian

7. Dr. Helton

8. Axl

9. Dr. Helton

10. Angus James

11. Dr. Helton

12. Joshua

13. Axl

14. Dr. Helton

15. Jim

16. Dr. Helton

17. Dr. Helton

18. Helen

19. Dr. Jane Helton

20. Helen

21. Jane Helton

22. Jane

23. Angus James

24. Meg

25. Meg

26. Angus James

27. Axl

Acknowledgments

Other Books by Kate L. Mary

About the Author

Twenty years ago…

He came to slowly, moving in and out of consciousness over several days, although at the time it felt more like several years. When he was out there was nothing but darkness piled on top of darkness, a never-ending sea of black that seemed to be trying to suffocate him, but when he was awake the world around him was blurry and unreal and felt more like a dream. Nothing made sense, and at first Angus had a hard time even remembering where he’d been the last time he was with it or why he’d been there to begin with. He couldn’t remember much of anything other than the fact that he was supposed to be saving the world, only he now felt certain that nothing was going to play out the way he’d expected it to.

Day five came and he felt more like his old self, although still a little groggy. The lights above him were dim but still too bright for his tired eyes, and he had to blink several times to get his gaze to focus on his surroundings. But even when they came into view he couldn’t stop blinking, because nothing he saw looked familiar or answered any of his questions about what he was doing or where he was.

The room he found himself in felt like a different world. It was dimly lit and stark white, and the beep of the machines around him was unrelenting. He was so weak that it took almost all his energy to lift even one arm, and every inch of his body hurt like he’d been dragged behind a truck for hundreds of miles. He was strapped down too, making it impossible to stand even if he’d felt like he had the strength, and there were tubes coming out of both of his arms that led up to IV bags, as well as other sensors taped to his body.

Nothing made sense, but even before he’d come out of it completely, Angus knew that something had gone horribly wrong.

Time was lost to him. He had muddled memories of running toward the wall of Atlanta, and then the pain of being bitten, but the images and feelings weren’t sharp and he wasn’t even sure if they were real or how long ago it had all happened. It seemed like only hours had passed since he’d sacrificed himself for his friends and brother, but Angus instinctively knew that a lot more time had gone by. Just how much he didn’t know, and no one would tell him a thing.

They wouldn’t even talk to him. Men and women came into his room, most of them wearing white coats, and he hurled questions at them in a scratchy voice that sounded like a weaker and much older man than Angus James. But the people barely met his gaze, let alone answered his questions, and after a couple days he stopped asking altogether. Instead, he watched silently from his bed as the world moved forward around him, as people checked the machines and wrote things down, as they drew vial after vial of blood, injected things into his IV bag, and then once again left him alone.

A female doctor watched all of this happen through a window. She had blonde hair that she wore slicked back, not a single strand out of place, and sharp, unblinking brown eyes that seemed to take in every detail at the same time. She was in her mid-thirties, making her a year or two younger than Angus, and she probably would have been pretty if there had been anything soft about her at all. But there wasn’t. She was as hard as a statue that had been carved out of stone.

Days went by and she never came in, but everyone who left the room reported to her, and it didn’t take long for Angus to realize that she was the one who held the answers to all his questions. He watched her from his place on the bed, staring at her for days on end while he waited for her to come into his room, the hours seeming to stretch on and on in an endless cycle. The fuzziness of those first few weeks after he had regained consciousness made it difficult to remember a lot of details, but her presence outside his cell was something he would never forget. She seemed to be always there, always watching, like a sentry who would die if she left her post.

Years later when he thought back on it, Angus realized that he had to have been remembering it wrong. She couldn’t have been there every time he looked up. She was human after all, she needed sleep and food, and standing there twenty-four hours a day for weeks on end was impossible. But no matter how hard he tried to remember it another way, the image never changed. And then he didn’t want it to, because he didn’t want her to go away.

By the time the woman finally came into the room, Angus was more with it and rapidly losing patience. It had been a week since they’d unstrapped him from the table and allowed him to start moving around, and although he’d barely been able to stand at first, he was getting better. His legs were still as unsteady as a fawn taking its first steps, but he’d been working on it and his body was finally starting to feel more like its old self. He’d been exercising every day to regain his strength, knowing that he’d need it if he ever wanted to escape. Pushups weren’t something Angus James would have done in his old life, but this was a new world, and he knew he needed to be strong to get through this. Both mentally and physically.

He was in the middle of doing his daily pushups when the door clicked open. He paused halfway to the ground and turned his head, expecting to see more men in white coats with more needles. But it was her.

“You.” He allowed his body to drop to the ground, and then pushed himself up so he was standing. He was stronger than he’d been, but it still took effort, which he hated. He didn’t want to show weakness in front of anyone, but especially not this woman. “It’s ‘bout time you got your ass in here and answered some of my questions.”

Two men with guns walked in behind her, stopping just inside the door. It had only taken one bloody nose for the people running this place to learn that doctors couldn’t go into Angus’s cell alone. Weak or not, he refused to go down without a fight.

The woman stopped four feet away from him and nodded to the chair on the other side of the room. “Sit and we’ll talk.”

He didn’t want to sit. He wanted to charge her and knock her on her ass, then take out the men at her back and beat the shit out of them. From there he would run down the hall and out of this building, pummeling anyone who got in his way. Then he’d find his brother and friends, and together they’d get the hell out of wherever they were and never look back.

But Angus did sit, because he knew he wasn’t strong enough to do any of those things, even if he had known where to run or what to expect once he got out of this damn building, and he also knew that cooperating was the only way to get the answers he needed.

“Talk,” he barked, glaring up at the woman who was so stoic that she once again reminded him of a statue. “I wanna know everything.”

“No, you don’t.”

She lowered herself into a chair on the other side of the room, never once taking her eyes off him. She balanced on the edge, her back straight and her ass barely on the seat as if she was ready to run at the first sign that Angus might become violent. Behind her the guards didn’t move from their spot by the door, but Angus was too busy trying to decide if what the woman had said was true to really register their presence. It probably was. He was a prisoner, after all, and while he had done many horrible things in his life, he couldn’t remember anything recent that was bad enough to land him here. The opposite, actually, because he had been on the way to save the world, something that no one ever could have predicted that Angus James would do. And yet here he was, locked away like a criminal.

“But I will tell you,” the doctor said after a heavy silence. “This is your new home. This room.”

She paused, allowing Angus to drag his gaze away from hers and study his surroundings, and when he did, his gut clenched like she had reached into his stomach and grabbed him by the intestines.

There was nothing for him here. His room was little more than a cell, tiny and sterile. The bathroom was even smaller and cramped with it’s sink, toilet, and shower. A bed that was really just a cot had replaced the hospital bed once they’d removed his restraints. They’d also brought in a small round table and a chair so he had a place to eat the meager meals he was served, and a small couch that was stiff and uncomfortable, reminding him of something you’d find in the waiting room at a doctor’s office. Other than that there was no furniture or books or anything else he might be able to pass the time with. And it seemed that time was all he had now.

“Why.” Angus was surprised by how ragged the word came out, surprised by the emotion that now clogged his throat, threatening to choke him.

“Because you’re immune and we need you,” she said, her voice as detached as her expression.

“I came. You asked me to come and I did. Ain’t that enough?”

“No.”

The doctor shifted in her chair, scooting back just a little so she could cross her legs, and the lack of emotion struck Angus like a punch. She didn’t care at all that he was going to be a prisoner in this building for the rest of his life. That he would stay here, in this room, week after week, year after year, alone and cut off from everyone he loved.

That’s when it hit him that he wasn’t even sure where the people he loved were. If they were alive or dead, if they were being held like he was. For all Angus knew, Axl was in a cell next to him, and Vivian in another. Even worse, they could all be dead. Angus’s memory of their rescue was fuzzy at best. He recalled running, being so close to the wall that they could touch it, but unable to find an entrance. The group had been small by then: Axl, Vivian, Parvarti, Joshua, himself, and the baby. Megan. That’s what Hadley had named the child before she’d died, and that tiny creature was part of the reason Angus had thrown himself at the zombies when the horde closed in on them. He’d taken the bites and the scratches because he knew he could survive, unlike everyone else, and it had hurt like hell. Like he was being ripped apart piece by piece, which he now knew by looking down at his healing skin was almost true. But it hadn’t hurt as much as this moment did.

But they’d been saved. At what had felt like the last possible moment, when Angus was so bloody and damaged that he wasn’t sure if he could go on, a truck had come out of nowhere and saved the day. Men with weapons had plowed the zombies down and dragged him into the truck. He remembered it, remembered how it had felt to not have to support himself on his wobbly legs, what a relief it had been to be spread out on the floor. He could practically feel his body sway back and forth as the truck barreled down the road. But that was it. That was the last memory other than a few shouts from people he didn’t know as hands he didn’t recognize worked on him. Then blackness followed by waking up here.

Of course, Angus now realized that all of that could have been a dream. Maybe they hadn’t been saved, maybe they’d been overtaken and he had somehow survived out there and been found, bloody and damaged and barely clinging to life. It was entirely possible that the zombies could have killed his brother and friends before they’d ever reached the gate. Or by whoever held him captive here after they were inside and thought they’d found safety.

“Where’s my brother?” Angus asked even though he didn’t want to talk to this woman. He wanted to strangle her. “He alive?”

She nodded once and it was so robotic that it looked like she had been programmed to do it. “He is. He and Vivian and the baby have an apartment, as do all your other friends. Al and Lila made it here shortly before your arrival. They’re all settled in. They have jobs. They’re happy. And, as long as you cooperate and don’t cause trouble, they will stay that way.” She held his gaze as she said the next words, like she wanted to make sure the impact really hit home. “If you do not cooperate, however, we will bring one of them here and put them in the cell right across from you, and then we will inject them with the virus so you can watch as they turn.”

He’d never felt the impact of words the way he did just then. Never understood how people could let words get under their skin the way they did. But at that moment, with the evil blonde doctor sitting in front of him and the image of Vivian or Axl or Rambo in the cell across from him, suffering as the virus slowly killed them, Angus felt like the doctor’s statement had crawled inside him and curled around his lungs, forcing all the air out of him in one violent burst.

“Do you understand what I’m saying to you?” the doctor asked.

“Yeah,” Angus said, finding it difficult to get the word out. “I got it.”

“Good.” The doctor cleared her throat. “You are in the CDC, in case you hadn’t already figured that out, and have been here for a little over two months. Your brother and friends have been told that you died from your injuries, so no one is going to come looking for you. As I said, you will live out the remainder of your life here because we need your blood so we can study its immunities. You’re special and we want to know why. You will give us full access to your body whenever and however we want it. You will allow us to take blood when we need it, you will allow us to take your temperature or blood pressure when we deem it necessary. If we want to inject you with something it will happen without violence or bloodshed. Those are the terms you must abide by if you want your family and friends to remain safe. Do you understand?”

Angus couldn’t speak. His whole life he’d never had trouble telling people to go to hell when he wanted to, but at that moment he couldn’t muster a single word. They had him by the balls and he couldn’t do a damn thing about it. They knew he wouldn’t risk his family, especially not when he had nowhere to go. He didn’t know a lot about the CDC, but he knew that it had to have better security measures than any bank had ever had, and he knew there were armed guards everywhere. Even if he did somehow manage to break his way out of this room, he wouldn’t make it to freedom.

This was his future. This room. This woman. This hell.

“I expect a response,” the doctor said when he remained quiet.

“Yeah,” Angus muttered, staring at the floor. “I got it.”

Vivian popped through the door of the food center, smiling when she saw Lila behind the counter. She couldn’t believe it had been more than two months since they’d arrived in Atlanta, but it had. Slowly they’d gotten into a routine and things had begun to feel almost normal, or as normal as things could feel during a zombie apocalypse, anyway. She was adjusting to being a mom, every day falling more and more in love with the baby her friend had entrusted to her, while the scars all the months leading up to their arrival here slowly began to heal. Axl especially was hurting, but Vivian knew that even though he missed his brother and had regrets about how things had turned out, he too was starting to fall into a routine that almost felt normal.

Life in New Atlanta was oddly repetitive. They worked, they took care of Megan, and they spent time with friends. The system was set up so everyone had what they needed while they also worked toward moving forward, keeping them busy and focused on the future instead of wallowing in memories of what they had lost.

“Quitting time already?” Lila asked when Vivian stopped in front of her.

The girl’s hair was piled on top of her head in a messy bun and she didn’t have an ounce of makeup on her face, something that pre-apocalypse Lila would have never done, but she was smiling and laughing with her coworkers. The job of handing out food rations was an easy one, and it helped her get to know a lot of people in the settlement since everyone ended up here to collect their rations, which suited Lila well since she’d always been a social person. To Vivian, she had never looked so beautiful, and despite everything they’d been through, the teen seemed to exude happiness. She and Al had settled into married life like pros, not like two teenagers who had lost everything, and the change in them was both startling and positive.

“It’s four,” Vivian said. “Time to head home and get dinner ready.”

Lila smiled as she swept a bag up off the counter. She held it out to Vivian, who took it, before grabbing a second one for herself. Lila paused just long enough to say goodbye to her coworkers before joining her on the other side of the counter, and together they left the food center so they could walk home, each holding a bag of rations in their arms.

Their Monday walk home had become routine, Vivian meeting Lila at the food center so she could get the weekly food rations for Axl and herself, and then the two women would walk back to the their apartment together. It helped Vivian feel like things were moving forward. Like they were getting settled in and life could start over. More than anything, it helped her get to know Lila better than she’d been able to out on the road.

Summer was in full swing and even though Vivian had gotten a little more used to the oppressive humidity of Georgia, she’d started to sweat before she and Lila had even reached the end of the street. The bag in her arms was heavy, but the weight was welcome because it meant that she and Axl would eat. The weeks out on the road scrounging for food was something she would never forget, and if nothing else she appreciated the new government’s attempts at keeping everyone fed. She wasn’t alone in that, either.

Lila was silent at first, which was unusual for her, but sensing that the girl had something on her mind, Vivian stayed silent and waited for her to come out with it. After over a year of being with Axl, she was used to long, thoughtful silences. Even if it wasn’t normal for the teenager at her side to slip into them.

“I’m pregnant,” Lila finally said, dropping a bomb that made Vivian freeze in her tracks.

“What?”

She watched as pink spread across the younger woman’s cheeks, and when Lila looked down it reminded Vivian of a teenager confessing to her parents that she had gotten knocked up. She knew how that felt personally, only she wasn’t this girl’s mother and even though Lila was technically still a teenager, she didn’t seem like one anymore. Not after everything they’d been through. People had to grow up fast in this world or it would eat them whole, and Lila had done just that.

“I found out last week but I’m just not sure when to tell everyone,” she said, still staring at the ground like she couldn’t stand the thought of looking Vivian in the eye. “We’re all still recovering and adjusting, and telling people just doesn’t feel right.”

“You must not be very far along.” Vivian asked.

Around them the streets of New Atlanta bustled with activity. Construction crews dragging things into buildings they were in the middle of renovating, hoping to make room for the constant stream of survivors that found their way to the city. Men and women who looked shell-shocked passed, their eyes wide as they hurried down the sidewalk, still unused to the fact that they didn’t have to look over their shoulder every other second. The group had been in the city for only nine weeks, so Vivian knew how they felt. Safety was a hard thing to accept after the months they’d spent on the road.

“I’m six weeks along. The baby will be about ten months younger than Megan.” Lila started walking, keeping her eyes straight ahead as she adjusted the bag on her hip. “I wanted to let you know so you weren’t surprised when my name popped up on the list of women needing a midwife.”

Lila’s tone said that she was still uncomfortable talking about it, but Vivian wasn’t sure if it was unhappiness or if she was just trying to be conservative with her joy. The last two pregnancies in their group hadn’t gone well. First Sophia, who had been pregnant when the virus was released, and then Ginny. They’d all known Sophia’s baby didn’t stand a very good chance of surviving because the father, her husband, hadn’t been immune to the virus, but then there had been Ginny—Hadley Lucas as she’d once been known. Her baby had lived while she’d died from complications, and that risk was just as much a part of reality these days as the other one was. Bad things happened in this world. Something they knew all too well.

Babies born inside the wall stood a better chance thanks to the doctors at the CDC, but they were still dying fairly regularly. Vivian knew because she was training to be a midwife and saw the deaths on a daily basis. She could understand Lila’s hesitation, but she also wanted the other woman to be happy about this. Not just for her own sake, but for Vivian’s as well, because she wanted to believe that getting pregnant could once again be a good thing. That the light they’d seen at the end of the tunnel when they reached Atlanta had been real and not just a mirage.

“Lila.” Vivian said the girl’s name slowly, hoping to grab her attention, and when Lila looked her way, she smiled. “Congratulations.”

She let out a relieved laugh, and then tossed her hair over her shoulder in a way that reminded Vivian of the teen she’d first met back in the shelter in the middle of the Mojave Desert. It didn’t happen often anymore. Lila had matured in a way that Vivian had never expected. If she had been a betting woman back then, she never would have put money on the girl at her side, but like so many other people since this whole thing started, Lila had surprised her.

“Al’s beside himself. I thought he’d be freaked out when I told him, but he started jumping up and down. He’s so cute, talking to my stomach every night when we lay down.” Lila rolled her eyes, but the grin on her face grew wider, giving her true feelings away. “I sure did get lucky.”

“We all did,” Vivian said, nudging the girl with her hip.

“Yeah,” she mumbled.

But her voice dropped and her smile faded, and Vivian knew she was thinking of the people they’d lost along the way and how their luck hadn’t extended to their friends. Jon and Hadley, Winston and Jessica and Darla. Angus. The shock of losing him, of losing all of them, had eased, but the pain hadn’t disappeared completely yet. Maybe it never would.

They walked a few minutes in silence and Vivian found herself trying to focus on the good things about being in Atlanta, hoping to push the melancholy away so it didn’t ruin the happy news Lila had just shared. It wasn’t tough because she was living a life she had never really thought possible. She and Axl had an apartment and a baby, and a warm bed to sleep in. There had been so many nights since they’d arrived here that she’d laid awake long after he’d gone to sleep just so she could listen to the heavy sound of his breathing, taking it in and allowing herself to accept that this was all real.

“I heard this ridiculous rumor at work yesterday,” Lila said, breaking the silence that had stretched out between them.

“What’s that?” Vivian asked almost absentmindedly, still thinking about the man she had come to love so much and how unreal it was that they’d managed to carve a life out of the hopeless lot they’d been handed.

“I heard that a man is being held in the CDC against his will.”

Vivian’s steps faltered yet again. “What?”

Lila stopped too and turned to face her. “I know it sounds nuts, which is why I didn’t want to bring it up, but I just couldn’t keep it to myself. You don’t think—” Lila hesitated, swallowing before she said the next words. “It can’t be him, right?”

“No,” Vivian said, but the word was mumbled and uncertain.

They’d seen Angus with their own eyes, hooked up to machines. Brain dead. He couldn’t be alive. Plus, why would anyone hold him against his will? He’d come to Atlanta voluntarily. There was no need to lock up a cooperative man.

But how would they even know if he hadn’t actually been brain dead? They had just taken Dr. Helton’s word for it, assumed that she’d have no real reason to lie because Angus had offered himself up for them. But what if? What if he—

“No,” Vivian said again, shaking her head as she continued down the street. They had enough to worry about without throwing crazy conspiracy theories on top of it all. “It can’t be true. Let’s not mention it to Axl, okay? He’s having a hard enough time getting over the loss and if he thinks he abandoned Angus, he’ll never forgive himself.”

Lila scurried to keep up with her. “Yeah, that’s what I thought too.”

They turned the corner and a commotion at the end of the street caught Vivian’s eye. There was a group of guards standing at the gate and they were dragging a man and a woman toward a truck. The woman was small, closer to a girl maybe, but the man was tall and broad and had dirty blond hair that was on the long side. He pushed against the men who were holding him, and something about him hit home with Vivian.

She walked faster, narrowing my eyes as she tried to get a better look.

“Vivian?” Lila called, practically running in an effort to keep pace with her friend.

“It’s him,” she said, just loud enough for Lila to hear. “It’s Jim!”

They’d only made it another ten feet before both the girl and the man Vivian thought was Jim were pulled into the back of the truck. The vehicle sped off, but she didn’t slow, instead rushing to the group of guards who were still standing around talking.

“Who was that?” she asked when she stopped in front of them, panting.

The man at the front of the pack turned and his eyes swept over her before going to Lila, making the hair on Vivian’s scalp prickle. He grinned as he nudged the guard at his side and nodded their way.

“Hello there.” The second man said, smiling as he pushed his hat back so it was out of his face. “What can we do for you on this fine day?”

Vivian’s back straightened and she had to bite back the urge to snap at the men. Before the apocalypse a reaction like this wouldn’t have made her think twice, but now, after the days she’d spent in the Monte Carlo, looks like this made her want to run. Or punch someone.

“Who was that?” she repeated, firmer this time.

“Just a couple survivors who climbed the wall trying to get in. No big deal.” The first man puckered his lips as his eyes zeroed in on her breasts. “They’re going to quarantine.”

She shifted her bag of rations, hoping to block his view. “Did you get his name?”

“We think we know him,” Lila added.

“No name, but he was yelling that he knew some people here.” The second man turned to his friend. “Who did he say his friends were?”

“Didn’t really pay close attention to the name. Alice?”

“No,” the other guard said, “that wasn’t it. It was something weird.”

“Axl?” Vivian’s heart leapt, pushing away the uneasy feelings the men’s looks had conjured up.

“Maybe.” The first guy shrugged like he couldn’t care less, and then grinned again. “You ladies interested in joining us in the entertainment district this evening?”

“I’m married,” Vivian snapped as she turned her back on him.

“I’m pregnant,” Lila said as she followed.

Vivian didn’t hear their reply.

The women hurried down the street side by side, Vivian holding her bag tighter than ever before.

“It has to be Jim,” Lila said.

Vivian wanted to agree, but after weeks of no word from their friend, she didn’t want to get her hopes up. “There’s only one way to find out,” she said instead. “Let’s get home and give the CDC a call.”

The apartment was quiet when she slipped inside, balancing the bag of rations on her hip. The shades were drawn and the only sound was the quiet tick of the clock on the wall. Megan was probably taking a nap, and Vivian had no doubt that Axl had joined her. He’d been working hard on the construction crew, a lot of late nights and early mornings, and between that and the baby she could tell it was starting to catch up with him. Sleep had never really been his favorite thing—he was too often greeted by nightmares of the day his mother died—but she’d been telling him for days that he couldn’t go on like this forever. Hopefully, he’d finally listened.

She set the bag on the kitchen counter before heading to the back of the apartment, keeping her steps light. Their daughter’s bedroom was empty, so she headed further down the hall to the room she shared with Axl. The door was cracked, and she pushed it open to find Megan and Axl curled up on the bed together, both of them out cold. The baby was snuggled in the crook of Axl’s arm, her tiny head resting against his bare chest, and the sight of it was so beautiful that Vivian suddenly found it hard to breathe. It was too good to be true, finding this man in the midst of such a disaster, then being handed this child in the midst of tragedy. Nothing in her early years of neglect and abuse had made her believe that she would one day have happiness, but she did.

She watched them for a few minutes before heading back to the kitchen to put their supplies away. Axl needed rest and if it was Jim, which Vivian was almost certain it had been, there was nothing they could do about it at the moment. He’d be in quarantine for forty-eight hours, anyway.

They were waiting in the lobby two days later when Jim was finally released from quarantine. It hadn’t even been necessary for Vivian to call the CDC, because guards had shown up at her door before Axl and Megan had even woken from their nap. It turned out that they were the first things Jim had asked about when he was questioned.

They hadn’t seen or heard from him since he ran out of that farmhouse more than two months before, sacrificing himself for the group by drawing the zombies away so the others could make their escape, and they had no clue where he’d been or who the woman was that he’d brought with him to New Atlanta. Vivian had pretty much given up hope of ever seeing Jim alive again, so having him pop up now after all this time felt like a miracle. There was a lot of that going around lately, though.

Megan was in her arms when Jim walked out with the woman Vivian had seen him in the street with two days earlier. She was pretty, but small and youthful-looking. Her dark skin contrasted with the sun-kissed tint Jim’s had taken on, and her eyes were bright despite the deep brown of her irises.

Axl stood at Vivian’s side, and next to him Lila and Al looked so excited they were practically bouncing. Their eagerness almost made up for the lack of emotion Parvarti and Joshua exuded. In Vivian’s opinion, those two were perfect for each other, and the sooner they realized it the sooner they could get past this funk they were in and start living their lives. They’d made it this far alive, and to not even try and start something new now felt like a waste to her.

“You made it,” Vivian said when Jim stopped in front of them, barely able to contain her excitement at learning that something had finally gone right.

“It was touch and go, but I’m a fighter.”

He slipped his arm around the shoulders of the girl at his side, and despite her size, Vivian could now see that she wasn’t as young as she’d originally appeared. Twenty perhaps, which was very close to her own age.

“We almost gave up hope,” she replied, trying to mask the fact that she had actually given up on the idea that they’d ever see him again.

“Made a detour.” He nodded toward the woman at his side who was looking back and forth between them with a wide, observant gaze. “This is Amira. I’d be dead if she hadn’t found me.”

Amira smiled as Jim introduced her to his friends, her gaze focusing on Jim when he spoke, and then looking the others over one by one before returning her gaze to him. She was quiet, but the silence was more intense than just a person who was busy taking in her surroundings, and something about it felt off to Vivian. She found herself really studying the girl as Jim talked, trying to figure out what it was.

“I can’t imagine what you went through,” Lila said, leaning into Al like the thought chilled her to bone and she needed comfort. “The world out there is terrifying.”

Amira shuddered and scooted closer to Jim, but she remained silent. Even after he gave her a little squeeze, she didn’t talk.

“You don’t have to tell us,” Jim said solemnly. His eyes, which had clouded over, moved to Axl. “I heard Angus didn’t make it.”

Axl’s gaze flitted to the floor and by the way he pressed his lips together, Vivian could tell he was fighting to keep his emotions in check. “Got the chance to say goodbye, that’s somethin’.” He shook his head. “He was in a coma, but they say people can hear you when they’re like that. Hope so.”

Amira perked up at Axl’s words, and Vivian suddenly remembered what Lila had told her two days ago about the man being held in the CDC. In all the craziness of Jim’s return, she’d forgotten all about it, but something in the newcomer’s gaze had her thinking about it again.

Jim shook his head and mouthed something to Amira that Vivian didn’t catch, but the girl seemed to get it. That’s when it hit her. Amira hadn’t said a thing and she concentrated on everything the others were saying like picking up the words took a great deal of effort, and Jim spoke extra slow when he was looking at her. Amira was deaf.

“They say we’ll have an apartment?” Jim asked.

“Right down the hall from us.” Vivian shifted Megan further up on her hip, still studying Amira. “We can show you.”

“So this place is really as good as they claim?” the woman asked. It was the first time she’d spoken, and not only was it louder than necessary, but her words were slightly distorted, confirming Vivian’s suspicions.

The others seemed to do a double take, but Vivian barely blinked before replying, keeping her face toward the other woman so Amira didn’t miss any of the words. “It’s not perfect, then again, nothing ever was. The important thing is that they’re trying. Not just here, but in other areas. One day we might have something real again.”

Jim slid his hand down Amira’s arm and laced his fingers through hers as he turned to face her. “You and I, we have something real right here. Right now.”

Vivian hadn’t known Jim that well before they’d left Colorado, he’d been living in Hope Springs while they had found a home in a gated community about twenty miles away, but his words still surprised her. He hadn’t seemed like the type of person to want to settle down and start a life. Then again, people who had known Axl before probably would have said the same thing. This world changed people. Made them realize what was important.

“I’d love to see that apartment now,” Jim said after a moment, “if you don’t mind.”

By the time Jim and Amira showed up at their apartment later that evening, Vivian was anxious to hear what he’d been doing for the last two months. They had spent the last few hours alone, getting settled into their new place, and even though they seemed happy when she opened the door, there was something in Jim’s eyes that caused anxiety to pool in her stomach. She didn’t like the way he was looking at her husband, almost as if he was dreading telling Axl something.

“Come in,” she said, trying to push the uncertainty away and enjoy the fact that Jim had practically come back from the dead.

He nodded as he walked by and Amira gave her a shy smile, but neither said a word. Despite her attempt to control her fears, the coil of dread wound tighter inside Vivian.

In the living room, Axl was in the middle of feeding Megan a bottle, and Jim’s expression relaxed when he stopped next to him. He stared down at Megan and his eyes seemed to shimmer, but not with tears. It seemed to Vivian that it looked more like hope or relief, or maybe even nostalgia. The older Megan got the more she began to resemble her parents, and with every passing day, Vivian was able to see more and more of her dead friends in the daughter they had left behind.

“So how’s fatherhood?” Jim asked Axl.

“She don’t let us sleep, but I never slept all that much anyway, so I can’t complain.” He grinned down at the baby. “Plus, she makes up for it by bein’ cute.”

Jim’s smile was a little sad, but he nodded. “She sure is.”

He and Amira settled onto the couch next to Joshua. On the other side of the room Parvarti sat, separating herself from the group as usual. Al was hovering over Axl’s shoulder and Vivian knew he was just dying to get his hands—hand—on Megan once she was done with her dinner. The kid—Vivian knew she needed to stop thinking of him like that, but it was going to be a tough habit to break—had baby fever big time.

The men talked while she went back to the kitchen where Lila was busy throwing a salad together. They’d had to combine all their fresh rations for it, but Vivian had no doubt that it would be worth the sacrifice. She’d never really been a salad person before, but it was amazing the things she savored after a year of living on almost nothing. Now she’d gladly scarf down an entire spinach salad and love every bite. Fresh food was a luxury that she would never again take for granted.

“How are you feeling?” she asked Lila as she sliced a loaf of bread, keeping the pieces thin so it would last as long as possible.

“Better. I haven’t been sick, but I was pretty tired at first.” She looked over her shoulder like she wanted to make sure no one else would overhear her. “I had no idea all the problems that came with being pregnant. I’ve been so constipated.”

Vivian snorted out a laugh, then shook her head. “Sorry, but that was about the last thing I expected you to say.”

Lila laughed too, and the sound was so light and free that it felt unreal after all the struggles and heartache they’d endured over the last year. “Sorry. I guess I was just wondering if you had the same problem. You know, back when you were pregnant with Emily.”

Vivian’s smile faded, but only a little. It had been over a year since she’d lost her daughter, back in the beginning days of the apocalypse, and the pain had faded enough that she was able to think about their brief time together and be grateful that they’d had the chance at all. She’d never really thought she would, not after giving the little girl up for adoption and moving across the country, but for some reason when the virus began to sweep the country, the only thing Vivian had been able to think about was finding her daughter and making sure she was okay.

“Honestly, I don’t remember a whole lot about the pregnancy. I was sixteen and scared out of my mind, and mostly I just remember trying to figure out what I would do if my clothes didn’t fit after she was born.” Vivian paused in the middle of slicing so she could look Lila’s way. “It wasn’t like my alcoholic dad was going to cough up any money to buy me new clothes.”

Lila frowned and her hazel eyes moved to the carrot she was chopping. “Oh yeah, sorry.”

Vivian had grown up in a trailer with nothing. Her mother had run off when she was only ten, leaving her alone with an abusive drunk of a father. It hadn’t been a happy childhood and she’d felt alone most of her life, which was probably one of the main reasons she’d found herself pregnant at sixteen. Back then she’d been willing to take any kind of attention offered to her, even the negative kind.

In contrast, Lila’s family had been wealthy. So rich, in fact, that they’d owned a condo in the underground luxury shelter the group had hijacked. Even though it didn’t matter much these days who had once had money and who had been forced to scrape by, Vivian knew that at times Lila felt guilty about how easy her early years had been. But in Vivian’s opinion they’d pretty much been in the same boat. Lila’s parents had given her everything but their love, and just like Vivian, she’d been alone when she should have had parents to lean on.

“It’s fine,” she said, nudging Lila lightly with her elbow. “It happened and I survived and now I’m here. That’s all in the past. Plus, it made me a stronger person. It helped me survive.”

Lila nodded as she continued her work with the carrots, and after a few seconds the smile was back on her face.

“What about you and Axl?” she asked. “I know you have Megan right now, but eventually you’ll want to have a baby. Right?”

Vivian shrugged like the question was no big deal, but inside she felt that familiar pang of worry. “Eventually. But right now I think we’re pretty content.”

In truth, she did want a baby with Axl, very much, and ever since Lila had confessed that she was pregnant, Vivian had found herself thinking about it more and more. But things were still so uncertain. Just that morning she’d helped deliver a little boy who’d died in less than an hour. He’d come out all pink and screaming just like he was supposed to, but things had gone south in minutes. It had been obvious by his labored breathing that every breath was a struggle for him. It was horrible to watch, and even though his death had ripped the parents in two, it was a relief when he’d finally slipped away and was at peace instead of in pain.

That was why Vivian was holding back, but she couldn’t bring herself to tell her friend that. Lila was already pregnant, and even though she knew babies were still dying, she hadn’t seen it with her own eyes. To her it was still something that happened to other people, not to her, and Vivian didn’t want Lila to associate that reality with the baby she was carrying. There would be plenty of time for her to worry.

They ate dinner, spread out around the living room and crowded around the table. The conversation was loud, which made up for the less than stellar meal, and the slightly celebratory atmosphere brought to mind another meal not too long ago. Back when they’d still been in Colorado and a large group of them had crowded around a small table in Brady’s kitchen, laughing and enjoying a morning that should have been full of heartache but had instead turned out to be filled with joy.

It felt like yesterday when she thought about it now, remembering the day before that one when she, Axl, and Angus had gone out to look for supplies. They’d run into trouble and in the middle of trying to get away, Angus had been bitten. It should have been the end for him and they had thought it was, but as hours went by and nothing happened, another reality began to emerge. That was the day they’d realized that Angus James was immune to zombie bites.

Still, she had gone to bed that night uncertain about what the future held, unsure if the morning would bring death or hope. But she’d awakened to a new beginning of sorts, and when she’d walked into Brady’s house the next day she was greeted by the sound of laughter and had found everyone in the kitchen, gathered around a table that was much too small for the group.

Most of those people were gone now, or back in Colorado still, and despite the boisterous atmosphere in the small apartment Vivian now shared with Axl and Megan, she suddenly felt her friends’ absence more deeply than she ever had before. Darla and Winston and Angus were dead, all taken in different ways, but all their deaths had been just as heartbreaking. Brady, Sophia, little Ava, Max, and Anne had all stayed behind in Colorado when the rest of them had headed for Atlanta. They’d all had their reasons, heartbreak or the inability to say goodbye to the past, but she missed them all. Probably always would. Hopefully they were working to create a new life for themselves in Colorado.

After dinner Axl broke out the bottle of wine he’d splurged on when they’d found out Jim had in fact arrived in Atlanta. Once the glasses were filled, everyone settled in the living room while Vivian took Megan to bed. She’d fallen asleep on Al’s arm and was so out that she barely moved when her mother set her in her crib.

Vivian stood for just a moment, staring down at her adopted daughter while thinking about Lila and Al and the life they were going to bring into this world. She and Axl had talked about it so much that it felt like they’d gone around in circles, and until now her resolve to wait until things were more secure had felt like the right decision. Something about the hope of having Jim back had changed that feeling, though. Maybe it had to do with how Megan had come to exist and how crazy it felt knowing that she had been a product of something so horrible, yet was loved so much now.

Even though she had escaped relatively unscarred, her days in the Monte Carlo weren’t something she liked to think about. The idea of men collecting women and using them as currency still made her shudder, and the reality of what she’d witnessed there was as vivid now as it had been back then. Hadley, however, hadn’t been so lucky, and it was because of what had happened in that casino that they’d had doubts about who Megan’s father was. Jon or the man who had taken advantage of Hadley in that hotel.

Vivian thought about those days of uncertainty as she shut her daughter’s door, keeping it cracked just enough that they would be able to hear her if she woke. There was no doubt in her mind anymore, and she only wished that Jon and Ginny—Hadley—had been able to learn the truth before they’d died.

“You got somethin’ on your mind,” Axl was saying when Vivian walked back into the living room.

His eyes were on Jim, who had been friendly and happy during the evening but also a little reserved. Vivian knew she wasn’t the only one who’d noticed, but no one had brought it up. Until now that is. Axl always did know how to bide his time.

“We do.” When Jim glanced toward Amira, he almost looked nervous. “Amira heard something when she was in the CDC.”

“Heard?” Axl asked, sounding doubtful.

“Read lips,” Amira clarified, not seeming to take offense at Axl’s insinuation that she couldn’t hear a thing. “When I was first taken to quarantine there were two guards talking. They didn’t know I could understand what they were saying.”

Vivian perched herself on the arm of Axl’s chair and he sat forward, resting his hand on her lower back. His fingers moved slowly, almost absentmindedly, while he waited to find out what Amira had overheard, and even though Vivian’s insides were a mess of nerves, nothing in Axl’s countenance gave away that he was the least bit uneasy.

Silence settled over them as everyone waited for Amira to speak. On the other side of the room, Al and Lila had stopped laughing, and Joshua stood as straight as a board almost as if he knew what was coming. Parvarti, too, looked alert and ready, and the longer the silence stretched out, the more tense even Axl became until his fingers finally stopped moving up and down Vivian’s spine.

He sat forward. “What?”

“They were talking about someone,” Amira said. “They called him a cabbage.”

“Cabbage,” Lila repeated, but there was no confusion in her voice and it wasn’t a question.

Amira nodded. “They called him a cabbage first, then a vegetable.”

Joshua took a step closer, positioning himself so she would be able to see his lips. “A vegetable?”

“Yes.” Amira nodded firmly as if the gesture would convince everyone of what she’d overheard.

“Don’t mean a thing,” Axl said. “They told us they was keepin’ Angus in a coma.” When he swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbed and his next words came out slightly choked. “We already knew that.”

Amira glanced toward Jim like she thought she might need backup, and then once again focused on Axl. Her brown eyes held his for what seemed like hours, almost as if she was willing him to take her next words seriously. “Except the one guard said the man wasn’t a vegetable anymore. He said the guy was awake.”

Vivian let out a deep breath, unable to wrap her brain around what Amira had just said.

“That’s insane,” Al said.

It did seem insane. They couldn’t be keeping Angus in the CDC. Could they? Why would anyone do that? Who could be that evil?

Vivian looked toward Lila, whose gaze was already focused on her. The other woman’s hazel eyes were full of questions that had no answers. They’d agreed not to mention that insane rumor to Axl, but that was before this bomb. Before this they’d had no proof that the rumor had anything to do with Angus at all, and even though they still didn’t know for sure, it seemed pretty suspicious. Somehow she had known this was coming even before Amira had started talking, and it seemed to Vivian that it was confirmation of the rumor Lila had heard. Or at least confirmation that they needed to check into things a little more.

Lila raised her shoulders in a questioning shrug, and before she could talk herself out of it, Vivian nodded. As much as she wanted to protect Axl from any more pain, she couldn’t ignore this. If Angus was alive and being held against his will they needed to know.

“Maybe not,” she said after a second. All eyes were on her. “Lila heard something the other day, but we brushed it off. It seemed nuts.”

Axl’s hand dropped from her back as he turned his gaze on Lila. “What? What’d you hear?”

“Just a rumor,” she whispered, and then repeated what she’d told Vivian, saying the words slowly like she was afraid the shock might be too much for Axl.

Vivian listened in silence, trying to gauge his reaction, but he didn’t give anything away. He’d be angry with her, that much she knew, but would he believe the rumor?

“That it?” Axl asked when Lila was done, his tone as calm and collected as usual.

“That’s all.”

Silence spread across the room as they all thought it through.

Vivian’s own mind wasn’t even close to being made up and she was sure she wasn’t alone. It was suspicious and raised a lot of questions, but it was by no means damning. The rumor was just a stupid rumor. You couldn’t believe half the things you heard on the streets these days. In fact, just yesterday she’d heard two women talking about how the virus hadn’t really been responsible for the zombies at all because they were a plague from God. As if that made any sense.

Just like that little tidbit of insanity, this could’ve been just another rumor started by a wacko who had gone nuts after months of wandering the country, and it was even possible that the man Amira had heard the guards talking about could be someone else who was immune. Vivian had known Angus James personally and, despite the whispers in the settlement, she didn’t believe for a second that he’d been chosen by God to save the human race. His immunity had been a surprise, but to her it was just proof that there had to be other people out there who could also survive a bite. The CDC had located at least one other person before Angus arrived, and even though she’d died before they could get her here, logic told Vivian that someone else might have popped up since then. It even made sense, seeing how their last few efforts had ended so badly, that they’d decided to keep the person’s existence quiet until they knew for sure he or she was going to live. After all, people had been pretty let down after Angus died on his way into the settlement.

“It ain’t him,” Axl said after a few minutes of silent reflection. “It don’t make sense.”

“It makes perfect sense,” Parvarti snapped, showing more life and spunk than Vivian had seen out of her in a long time. “They needed him and we delivered him right to their door. Why wouldn’t they keep him locked up? Why would they risk him getting killed?”

Lila chimed in, then Al, then Joshua, everyone having a different opinion about whether or not the CDC was capable of holding a man against his will.

Since Vivian was on the fence she stayed quiet and let them discuss it, all the while thinking about what they could do to gather more information. Certain areas of the CDC were open to the public. A clinic was set up in the building so citizens had medical treatment when they needed it, and most of the time the lobby felt more like a town hall than a medical research facility. But as a midwife trainee she’d been in more of the CDC than the general population, and she knew that deeper in the building there were a lot of locked doors. Areas that would never be open to someone like her. No, a person would have to be a doctor to gain access to the secrets that existed behind those doors.

“You need to take that apprenticeship,” she said suddenly, looking up at Joshua.

Everyone stopped talking mid-sentence and turned her way.

“I’m sorry?” Joshua said.

“Dr. Helton has been asking you to be an apprentice since we got here and I know you aren’t thrilled about the idea, but it will give you access to more of the CDC. Right?”

He nodded, but just like she’d predicted, he didn’t look thrilled by the idea. “What will that gain us?”

“Look, I don’t know if these rumors are true, but the only way to find out for sure is to snoop around a little. But we all know it would be impossible for the rest of us to poke around the CDC. It’s sealed tight. But you could get access if you were working with Dr. Helton.”

“She’s right,” Parv said, turning to face Joshua. She had to tilt her head back to look him in the eye because she was so short, but when she did, she fixed him with a serious gaze. “Right now we only have rumors, no facts. If you’re working in the CDC you’ll be able to gather some real information. Not just about whether or not Angus is there, but about what they’re doing.”

“They’re creating a vaccine,” Lila said, and then looked around. “Aren’t they?”

“That’s what they say, but who knows.” Parv shrugged.

Once again silence fell over them.

Vivian had never known Parvarti to be such a conspiracy theorist, and it had her wondering what the other woman had seen around the settlement to make her so suspicious. She was working as a guard, and steadily moving up in the ranks thanks to the fact that she was cool under pressure and not afraid to put herself in the line of fire, so maybe she’d seen something that she wasn’t sharing. Maybe Lila’s coworkers weren’t the only ones who liked to gossip.

“Why do you think that?” Vivian asked.

Parv turned to face her, her dark eyes serious. “The CDC has their own guards. Men who live there night and day.”

“Why?” Lila asked, the word coming out like a gasp.

“I don’t know,” Parv said, punctuating each syllable. “But don’t you think it’s possible this rumor could have something to do with it?”

No one spoke for a few minutes and the silence that fell over them was heavier than ever before.

It was broken when Joshua nodded, his eyes focused on the ground as he said, “I’ll do it.”

Axl barely spoke the rest of the night, but Vivian let him be. She knew they’d talk later, after everyone had left, and she wanted to give him a chance to think things through before then. He wasn’t someone who typically acted on emotions, but the few times he had, he’d said things they’d both regretted.

When Angus was bitten Axl had been sure that his brother was going to die, and he’d yelled at her. Blamed her for being impulsive and putting them all in danger. He hadn’t been totally wrong, but it wasn’t how he usually liked to deal with things and Vivian knew better than to prod him into talking before he was ready.

She didn’t bring it up until after everyone had gone home for the night and she’d slipped into bed next to him. He was staring at the ceiling, his arms crossed in a way that reminded her of a petulant child, and it almost made her smile even though she knew they were about to have words. Not a fight necessarily, more like dealing with things that were uncomfortable to talk about.

“You’re mad,” she said when he didn’t look at her.

“Nope.” His mouth scrunched up the way it got when he was thinking something through, and he still didn’t look away from the ceiling.

She waited for him to say more and when he didn’t, she decided to press him. “Then what?”

“Confused,” he said flatly.

He was a man of few words, but by now she was used to drawing them out. Used to getting him to talk to her about what he was thinking and feeling, even when he didn’t want to.

“About?”

“‘Bout whether or not my brother’s alive and why my wife would lie to me.”

Wife. Hearing that word come out of his mouth wasn’t new and it wasn’t a surprise, but it still affected her in a way she couldn’t explain. Still made her insides heat up and tingle, made her want to pull him against her and wrap him in an embrace. They weren’t officially man and wife and odds were they never would be. She didn’t wear a ring and neither did he, but in their eyes they were married. It was something they hadn’t even talked about. It had just happened, each of them referring to the other that way as if it was the natural course of things, and Vivian supposed it was.

She let out a sigh, wishing that she could follow her instincts and kiss him instead of dealing with the elephant in the room, but she knew that leaving it for later wasn’t a good idea.

“I didn’t lie to you,” she said, turning onto her side so she was facing him. “Axl, look at me.” He did, his gray eyes studying hers. The look of betrayal in them hurt, and it also wasn’t fair. “I didn’t lie,” she repeated. “Lila told me about the rumor but it sounded nuts and I didn’t want to hurt you. Why would I think something so crazy could be true?”

“Shoulda told me.” He went back to staring at the ceiling.

“So you are mad.”

“Hurt.”

A pang of regret cut at her insides and she found herself wondering if she should have told him. Maybe she’d been wrong, but at the time all she’d been able to think about was how much it would hurt him to believe that Angus was being held against his will, and with nothing but a single rumor to go on, it didn’t seem worth the pain it would cause.

Vivian scooted closer and grabbed his chin, forcing him to turn his face so she could look him in the eye again. “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again. But it’s not like this isn’t a common thing with us, trying to protect each other. It’s what we do. Before we got here we were always worried about physical threats. Zombies, other people, stuff like that. Now that we’re safe we’ve switched to emotional threats. I know you intentionally avoid mentioning Hadley to me. I’ve seen you almost slip and then cover it up. It’s the same thing. You don’t say her name because you don’t want to hurt me, and I didn’t tell you about that rumor because I didn’t want to inflict any more pain on you.”

He stared at her and she held her breath, hoping he’d see the honesty in her words and they could move forward from here. He only held her gaze for a second before pulling his chin out of her grasp. Then his lips were on hers and Vivian found herself on her back, locked in his embrace while they kissed. She wrapped one leg around his waist and pulled him against her as he moved, slow and steady. What little clothes they wore felt like nothing in contrast to the firmness of his body against hers. He ran his hands up her stomach, pushing her shirt up and out of the way as his tongue explored her mouth, and when he cupped her breasts, her back arched in response to his touch.

“Take off your underwear,” she said against his lips, anxious to have him closer to her. To feel his skin against hers.

Axl pulled back long enough to yank them off and Vivian took the opportunity to shimmy out of her own. When he was back, he practically ripped her shirt over her head before kissing her again, deeper this time. Urgently. Seconds later he was sliding into her, and the sensation was so familiar and welcome that it felt better than anything in the world. She lifted her hips to meet his as their gasps echoed through the room. Axl’s hands found hers and he lifted her arms above her head, lacing their fingers together and holding her hands as he moved, watching her with eyes that told her how much he loved her.

She could tell when he got close by the expression on his face, and she wasn’t surprised when he slowed.

“In or out?” he asked, sounding almost breathless.

“In,” she said before she could talk herself out of it.

He moved faster once again, releasing her hands so he could grab her hips. He hit that place inside her over and over, sending pleasure shooting through her. Driving her closer and closer to the release her body so desperately craved. She cried out just before his final thrust, and then he stilled above her, breathing hard as he rested his forehead on her bare breast and tried to catch his breath.

When he rolled onto his back, he took her with him, pulling her body against his so she was tucked under his arm and her cheek was on his chest.

“You changed your mind,” he said, his voice echoing through her head as he spoke.

They’d run out of condoms weeks ago, and oddly enough the settlement didn’t have them. Vivian wasn’t sure if they really were hard to come by—it was entirely possible people had gotten really freaky once they realized the world was going to end—or if the lack of condoms was the CDC’s way of forcing the survivors to continue the human race. Either way, she and Axl had been using the pull and pray method for a while now. It was at her insistence, though. He’d been ready to say screw it and roll the dice, but the thought of getting pregnant when things with this virus were still so uncertain had scared her. Still did. He asked every time, though, giving her the chance to make the decision.

“I guess I did,” she said, lifting her head so she could look him in the eye. “I started thinking about it more and more after Lila told me she was pregnant. It’s still scary, but I think you’re right. Things have always worked out for us before, so why not roll the dice?”

When he smiled, the scar on his chin puckered. She reached up to trace it with the tip of her finger, returning his smile as she thought about the two of them and everything they’d been through in the short time that they’d known one another. It felt like a lifetime ago that she’d been someone else, drifting through life with no real plans. Odd that the apocalypse was what had given her a purpose.

“I love this scar,” she said, tracing it again. “It reminds me of how strong you are. Tells me that you can make it through anything.”

“Long as we got each other,” he said, “there ain’t nothin’ that can stop us.”

The apartment was dark but cool when he woke, throwing him so off kilter that he couldn’t figure out where he was. He felt like a dumbass kid but was totally powerless to chase the fear of the unknown away. The total blackness of night was something he’d grown used to, but waking up not drenched in sweat wasn’t, not yet. After weeks of living with no electricity, the cool air flowing through the vents above the bed didn’t seem real.

Amira shifted at his side and when her leg brushed Jim’s, the warmth of her skin was familiar enough to bring him back to reality. They were safe. They’d risked a lot, had a few close calls—he rubbed the still healing gunshot wound just below his shoulder—but they’d made it here and now they could start a life. Together.

He calmed down as he settled back into bed, finding himself scooting closer to Amira’s small body. She shifted again, this time making a little noise that reminded him of the purr of a kitten. She snuggled closer and he wrapped his arms around her and held on like her hundred pound frame was the only thing keeping him anchored to this reality. It felt like it, anyway. Like if he didn’t have her he’d never be able to find steady ground again.

He’d only been twenty-six-years-old when the virus hit, but he’d felt closer to forty. For as long as Jim could remember he’d been drifting through life like death was just around the corner, and for him it probably would have been if things hadn’t changed. Only they did, and then most of the population was gone and he’d been faced with a choice: be the asshole he’d always been or man up and contribute. He’d chosen door number two, but even he hadn’t been ready to admit that he was just biding his time until the axe dropped once again, only this time he’d been certain it was going chop his fucking head off. It had never occurred to him, not even for a second, that he could have something good in his life.

That’s why he’d run out of that farmhouse on the way to Atlanta. Megan was only a couple days old and Angus needed to make it here alive so he could save the world, and everyone else in that house was family. They’d needed each other, but they hadn’t needed him. So he’d run, had led the zombies away so the others had a chance, never thinking that he’d see the light of day again let alone the wall surrounding New Atlanta. But now he was here and he had Amira, who had saved him more than once, and they were going to start a new life. It seemed much, much too good to be true.

Jim tried to go back to sleep but the draw of the new day and the waiting city was too much for him. He couldn’t get his brain to shut off, not when all the days and weeks ahead of them felt so bright and shiny and promising. So, after an hour of lying awake at Amira’s side, he finally gave up and slipped out of bed, careful not to wake her. She shifted when he slid out, but she didn’t open her eyes, and even though he wanted her to be able to enjoy the restful sleep she seemed to be getting, a pang of regret shot through him. It would be nice if she did wake now, and then he could undress her and explore her body, taking his time and savoring the safety of this apartment.

He let her be, though, instead heading out into their apartment where he stood at the window and stared out over the city. The sun was just coming up and in the distance the wall loomed, a symbol of hope and the promise of a future. Never before had he had so many things he wanted to do, but at that moment, staring out over the city, the possibilities of what he and Amira could have here felt endless.

“You’re awake.” Amira’s voice boomed through the apartment behind him, making him jump.

“Shit,” he muttered, grabbing his heart while turning to face her. “You shouldn’t sneak up on a person during the zombie apocalypse.”

She smiled as she crossed the room to him. She was wearing nothing but a tiny tank top that clung to her curves and a pair of pink cotton underwear, and damn if she didn’t look sexy as hell. One sway of her hips was all it took for the ache to start in his groin, and by the time she was standing in front of him, his dick was begging for freedom.

“Sorry.” She glanced toward the slowly rising sun, visible through the window. “It’s weird waking up here. Knowing that we don’t have to be afraid.”

Jim ran his hand down her side, slowly tracing the curve of her waist and hip, and when she looked back his way, her eyebrows were arched.

“I know. I was thinking the same thing.” He pulled her closer until her body was flush with his. “We should celebrate properly.”

He leaned down and brushed his lips against her neck.

“I think we already did yesterday,” she said, her voice just a little too loud in his ears. “Three times.”

Jim pulled back so she could read his lips. “You can never celebrate too much when you’ve cheated death.”

Amira smiled, but he wiped it away by closing his mouth over hers. He ran his hands down her back, enjoying the firmness of her breasts against his chest, and grabbed the hem of her tank top. He broke away from the kiss long enough to pull the shirt up over her head, and then his lips were back on hers and his hands were on her breasts. Her body was firm and fit from months of hard work—although he would have bet money that she’d been pretty fit even before the zombies showed up—and her brown skin glowed in the soft light streaming in through the window. They kissed while she shimmied out of her underwear, then pushed Jim’s pajama pants and boxer briefs down until they pooled around his ankles. He kicked them away and pulled her closer, wanting to feel every inch of her body against his.

Talking during sex was challenging since Amira couldn’t hear, so Jim worked hard at reading her body language. He took note when her mouth moved faster over his, when she lifted herself up on the very tips of her toes to be closer to him, when she started digging her nails into his arms. That’s when he lifted her, allowing her to wrap her legs around his waist so he could carry her to the couch. Jim sank onto the soft cushions, kissing her and gripping her waist as she shifted, still straddling him. Moving her body up and down. Whimpering. Begging. He kissed his way down her neck to her chest and sucked one nipple into his mouth, drawing a gasp of pleasure out of her. Her back arched and she threw her head back as her hands gripped his head, pulling him closer.

Jim’s gaze held hers when he finally slid into her, taking in the way she sucked her bottom lip into her mouth, almost as if she was trying to hold in a gasp of pleasure. They moved together, still watching each other, her meeting each of his thrusts with one of her own. He gripped her hips while she planted her hands firmly on his chest, using his body for leverage as they moved faster. She let out the gasp she’d managed to hold in earlier and he moved faster, forcing more gasps and moans out of her. Amira closed her eyes but Jim couldn’t look away as the moment of his release grew closer and he moved faster. She cried out only seconds before his own release came, and he thrust into her one final time.

They were both panting and their bodies were moist with sweat, but Jim didn’t feel like it had been enough. Nothing had been so far. They’d spent two days in quarantine when they’d arrived, separated and uncertain about what the other person was going through, and the whole time he’d been away from her he’d been desperate to feel her body against his. Now that he had her, though, he felt like he was missing something. Like this—although amazing—wasn’t really what he wanted from her.

They showered together, this time exploring one another under the warm stream of water that seemed like an act of God after weeks without the luxury. Amira’s skin was slick against his as he drove her to another orgasm, but once again he felt like something was missing, and his own orgasm felt oddly anti-climactic.

They dressed in silence, something Jim had gotten used to in the weeks he’d spent with Amira. While most people ran their mouths off all the time, they’d learned to be selective in their conversation. For one, they had to be facing one another when he spoke so she could read his lips, but there had also been the threat that too much noise would bring the dead. It had taken some getting used to, but Jim had grown to appreciate the silence.

When he turned to face her, she was smiling. “Should we explore the city?”

“Sure.” He shrugged, unsure if there was anything worth seeing but unable to deny his own intense desire to see their new home.

They had a couple days until they started jobs, giving them time to adjust, but this place, like any society, needed people to pitch in so things could run properly. Food was rationed, as was water, but citizens needed credits for everything else. The hundred credits they’d each been given when they arrived wouldn’t go very far. Electricity was included, but they had rent to pay and they’d need to buy clothes since they hadn’t brought much with them, as well as any other luxuries. Cigarettes, for one. Jim had been dying for a smoke since he’d run out about a week ago.

The humidity was like a punch in the face when they stepped outside.

“Fuck, it’s hot.”

Amira grinned up at him. “It’s July in Georgia, of course it’s hot.”

“I’m from Colorado, remember?”

It was odd, thinking about where he’d started and where he’d ended up. From rotting away in prison in Colorado, to a walled post-apocalyptic city in Georgia. Life sure did have a sense of humor. Or maybe that was God.

As they walked, Amira slipped her hand into his, making him feel like they were two teenagers out on a date. He wasn’t sure he’d ever walked down the street holding a girl’s hand, though, not even when he had been a teenager. Back then he’d been too interested in feeling the girl’s body to waste time holding hands, and he hadn’t given a damn what she thought or what she had to say unless it got him closer to that goal.

With Amira, though, Jim was happy to spend any time with her. Touching or not, it didn’t matter. Not really. Yes, the sex was amazing, but it wouldn’t have been nearly as amazing if she left the second it was over, and even though he’d been married before, the feeling was something new for him.

“What do you think you’re going to do?” As they walked, Amira kept one eye on the road and one on him so she was sure to catch his response.

“You mean for a job?” She nodded. “I don’t know. Probably construction with Axl. He said they’re cranking living quarters out like crazy and they could use the help. I don’t want to work the wall, that’s for damn sure. After taking all this time getting here, the last thing I want to do is spend any more time around zombies.”

She nodded but looked away before he could ask her what she wanted to do with her time.

“Do you think it’s weird?” she said after a moment of silence. “That they have everything so organized already, I mean. Credits and rent and jobs and all that.” She looked toward him. “It seems kind of fast.”

“They’ve been here for months.”

“True.” Amira pressed her lips together for a second before going on. “It just seems really organized considering how crazy the beginning was.”

She had a point, but Jim wasn’t sure if it meant anything.

They walked in silence for a bit after that, heading toward the part of the settlement where Vivian had told them they could find the markets and the food center. Jim had stuffed about fifty credits in his pocket before leaving the apartment, unsure how much cigarettes would cost or what else they might want to get while they were out. The food center should have had their names on a list by now so they could get the weekly rations they were entitled to, but anything else they got while they were out would have to be bought. Or traded for, assuming they had anything of value, which they didn’t.

The streets were more crowded than he’d expected, and being around people again after all these weeks was a bit of a shock to his system. Even Amira, who couldn’t hear the chatter from the crowd, looked at the people who passed with wide eyes. There were dozens of them, all ages and races, men and women and even some children. Some looked shell-shocked, but others acted like they’d settled into a routine and this was just any other day. Jim knew the feeling because he’d been pretty settled into life in Hope Springs before he’d decided to join this little group, and he envied the people he passed. Hopefully, it didn’t take long for him and Amira to feel that way as well.

They reached the building that housed the food center, but passed it and headed for the markets first. Stores had been emptied and restocked with goods, everything from clothes to personal hygiene items, to luxury items. Basically anything a person might want or need. He and Amira browsed for a bit, picking up a few things here and there. Most of the stuff was reasonably priced—two shirts for one credit or a pair of sneakers for two credits—and Jim began to get an idea of how much he’d need to earn to keep them going.

The stores with the luxury items were at the end of the street and it only took one step through the door to realize that these people didn’t take the word luxury for granted. Candy bars were five credits or more, bottles of booze could be up to fifty credits, and cigarettes, much to Jim’s displeasure, were ten credits.

He picked up a pack of Marlboros, which had been his brand once upon a time, and stared at them. His mouth was already watering, but the small stash of credits he’d brought with him had been chipped away a little at a time, leaving only twenty-two. He wanted the cigarettes, but they had other things they needed, and if the apocalypse had taught him anything, it was how to prioritize.

“Aren’t you going to buy them?” Amira asked when he set the pack down.

Jim shook his head. “They’re too expensive. I don’t need them.”

She grabbed his arm and turned him to face her. “You’ve been talking about how much you wanted a cigarette since you ran out. Buy them.”

“No,” he shook his head again. “It’s not important.”

She rolled her eyes and picked them up, and when she pulled a few credits out of her own pocket Jim felt oddly betrayed. Which was dumb. They’d both been given a hundred credits—to get them back on their feet—and she had just as much of a right to spend hers as he had to spend his. He just didn’t like the idea of her wasting credits on him.

“You don’t have to.” Jim reached for the credits but she pulled her hand away and slapped the paper on the counter.

The guy at the register swiped them up so fast there was no chance for Jim to grab them, and the way he narrowed his eyes felt like a dare. “Transaction’s done.”

Amira grabbed the pack and walked out of the store.

Jim found her waiting in the street for him. The pack was already open and she held it out, lifting her eyebrows expectantly like she was daring him to turn her down.

He snorted and pulled one out. “You are sneaky.”

“I just knew you wanted them and I knew you’d never spend the credits. You’re too selfless.”

Selfless? Jim stuck the cigarette between his lips and lit it while he thought that one through. The first inhale was like a soothing balm on a burn, and the moment the chemicals reached his lungs he felt like he was home after a long walk through the desert. He held the smoke in and then let it out in one long sigh.

“No one’s ever accused me of being selfless before.”

“Maybe you weren’t, but you are now.” She turned and headed down the street.

He slipped the pack into his back pocket and jogged after her. “Where are we going now?”

“I want to check out the entertainment district.”

She didn’t turn to face him, so he had to walk faster and get in front of her.

“Why? It’s ten o’clock in the morning. Do you need a drink that bad?”

“I want to get a job.”

She tried to walk past him, but he blocked her.

“Tell me you’re joking.”

“I’m not.” Amira let out long sigh and looked down, which he knew was her way of making it so he couldn’t interrupt her. “I was talking to Vivian and Lila last night, asking about the jobs, and this is one of the best paying jobs you can get. There are tips.”

Jim grabbed her chin and lifted her face. “We don’t need to be rich, we just need enough credits to live on.”

“But I want a family eventually. Don’t you?”

Jim swallowed. They hadn’t talked about this before, but that didn’t mean the thought hadn’t been in the back of his mind. Lila was pregnant, and Axl and Vivian had Megan. People were starting families all around them and it was only natural that Amira would want the same thing one day. But could he handle being a dad? It seemed like a big leap from where he’d been when all this started.

“If you don’t, just tell me,” she said when he didn’t respond, but she didn’t seem hurt or angry about it. More like she wanted to know where they stood. “I’m young, so I’m not talking about having a baby next week—”

“You know it takes nine months, right?”

She rolled her eyes. “You know what I mean. I just know that one day, a couple years from now, I’m going to want a baby. I think you will too even if the thought scares you right now, and I want to be ready, which means saving money—credits—so we’re prepared.”

Shit. She had a point.

“You’re right.” He finally let her chin go and took another drag off the cigarette. “And just so you know, it doesn’t scare me to think about having a baby. Not like that. It shocks me more than anything, I guess. I never thought I’d be this guy.”

“People change.” Amira took a deep breath. “I’m not going to strip or anything, but serving drinks in a bar wouldn’t be that bad. Right?”

“I guess not.” Jim threw his arm around her shoulders and started walking.

They visited five bars. Why the hell a post-apocalyptic settlement needed any bars was a question Jim couldn’t answer, but five was just the tip of the iceberg since they avoided all the ones that had strippers. He and Amira shared a beer—five credits—at the first one while checking the place out. It wasn’t busy, which was to be expected since it was still so early in the day, but it wasn’t empty either. The lone waitress wore a skimpy dress that barely covered her ass and made her look like she’d missed the last twenty meals. When she didn’t even bother going to the back room before shooting up—the bartender joining her—they decided to try another place.

The next bar was a shithole with glasses so filmy Jim wouldn’t even touch them, let alone drink out of one, but the third and fourth bars were slightly better. The waitresses were friendly and the place semi-clean, but when they asked about a job neither place was hiring at the moment.

So they left and headed to the last bar on the street: Dragon’s Lair.

The freshly painted dragon above the door was mid-flight and breathing fire, but when they went inside the place was empty. It was cleaner than the others, although it smelled of death, and Jim only had to take one look at the ring in the center of the room to know why.

“They do fights here,” he said, grabbing Amira’s arm. “No way.”

He’d heard all about the fights the night before from Axl and Parvarti, who had been discussing the possible problems the fights might bring to the settlement—namely someone getting bitten. The idea of anyone bringing zombies into the settlement just so some asshole could beat the shit out of them in the ring turned Jim’s stomach. No one would have ever accused him of being a prince before the apocalypse, but he liked to think that even he wouldn’t have been that reckless. Although there was a very good chance he was lying to himself on that point.

Amira pulled her arm out of his grasp and kept walking. “Hello?”

Her already loud voice boomed through the empty room, bouncing off the cement walls and coming back to them. The echo of footsteps came only seconds later and hearing them made Jim tense, although he wasn’t sure why. Maybe because he felt like anyone who would be okay with zombie fights had to be sick in the head.

“We’re closed,” a man said when he shoved the door to a back room open.

“I know.” Amira headed his way, her head held high in a way that told Jim she wasn’t going to back down and leave without talking to this man first.

Seeing her like that was sexy as hell, but something about it also made Jim uneasy. As if he had a sudden a glimpse into the future and he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that the best way to survive this world was to stay under the radar. After everything they’d discussed last night in Axl and Vivian’s apartment, Jim wasn’t taking anything in this place at face value.

“Sorry,” she said when she stopped in front of the man. “I was just wondering if you were hiring. We just got here and I’m looking for work.”

The man, a large guy with dark skin and a smooth head, narrowed his brown eyes on her. “You’re deaf?”

She nodded.

“How do you expect to take drink orders if you can’t hear?”

Amira’s back straightened even more. “I read lips.”

“I fight when the bar is open—” The man nodded toward the ring. “—and I can’t afford to hire someone who needs their hand held. Can you handle it?”

She lifted her chin the way she always did when she got her feathers ruffled, and despite his uneasiness about this place, Jim felt himself smile.

“If I can survive a zombie apocalypse on my own,” she said, “I think I can handle pouring a few drinks.”

The man pressed his lips together like he, too, was holding in a grin, but he kept his expression neutral. “You’re good-looking. Nice body.”

“Watch it,” Jim growled, taking a step forward.

“I won’t hire someone ugly. It would be bad for business.” The man waved him off without so much as a glance in his direction. “Turn around. Let me get a good look at you.”

Jim’s face grew hot as Amira slowly spun in a circle. He wanted to grab her and pull her out of there, but she’d already pushed him away once and he didn’t want to overstep. She was an adult, and even though he didn’t like the idea of her working among a bunch of parasites, she could make up her own mind.

“You’re going to need to get a dress. Something tight.” The man rubbed his chin as he thought it through. “I guess I can give it a shot. I’m going to warn you, though, I don’t have a problem firing you just because you’re deaf.”

“It won’t matter, but just so you know, I won’t put up with shit just because I’m deaf.”

The man pressed his lips together for a brief second before belting out a laugh. “Call me an idiot, but I think this just might work.”

Amira smiled too and that feeling came back to Jim, this time stronger. It was a shudder that shook his body, as well a feeling a dread that started deep inside him. As if someone had just walked over his grave. No. Not his grave, hers. He didn’t know why, the man actually seemed like a decent guy, as much as Jim didn’t want to admit it, but something about this felt like it would be the end of Amira, only he didn’t know why.

“I’m Dragon,” the man said, sticking his hand out.

Amira took it and the two of them shook hands. “Amira.”

She looked almost pale next to Dragon’s dark skin and she was tiny compared to the giant of a man. He was all muscle, like a Mac truck on steroids, but his brown eyes were friendly when he looked her over.

“You can start tonight if you’re serious,” Dragon said when he dropped her hand. “Ursula, my other waitress, will be happy to have the help.”

She nodded once. “I’ll be here.”

She watched the man through the window, the empty syringe still in her hand. She’d injected him only a few minutes ago and the virus hadn’t yet taken hold of him. She knew it would soon, though.

He was the second person to receive this strain, a mutation of the original that Star hoped would create the mindless killing machine he wanted. There was no prison in the settlement, something no one had quite caught onto yet, and this was where people who didn’t obey the rules set forth by Star typically found themselves. This particular man had been caught stealing on multiple occasions, an offense that seemed minor but still violated Star’s generosity in allowing any of these people to live. If he wanted to, he could kill them all with one virus, and anyone who chose to defy him over and over the way this man had didn’t deserve the privilege of living in the settlement.

Plus, they needed subjects for their tests.

Dr. Helton turned away from the man and moved to the cell next to him. The man she’d injected the day before was burning with fever—103 according to Helen—and delirious. It had only been twenty-four hours since the injection, so they were keeping a close eye on him. Hopefully, they’d see a change soon.

“Doctor?” someone behind her said.

She turned to find a guard standing five feet away, acting as if he was too afraid to come any closer to her.

“What can I do for you?”

“Star was asking for you.”

Dr. Helton lifted her eyebrows. “Now?”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

She nodded and headed past the guard, down the hall. “Thank you.” As she passed a sharps container, she tossed the empty syringe in and called back to Helen, “Keep a close eye on him. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

Dr. Helton stopped just outside the open door of Star’s office, unwilling to walk any closer once he came into view. Being summoned here wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, but the expression on his face was different than usual. She’d never seen him looking as angry as he did right now. He was so mad that he was practically shaking as he read the paper in his hand, his eyes scanning the words over and over again like if he read them enough they would say something different. She had no clue what had happened, but it couldn’t have been anything good.

“You wanted to see me,” she said when he didn’t look up.

Star lowered the paper and turned his eyes on her. The expression in them was so intense that she could practically feel the burn from them and she had to stop herself from taking a step back. Dr. Helton knew that Star trusted her more than anyone else on his team. They were colleagues, partners in crime when it came to this virus and the decision to wipe out most of the human race. Still, even she had moments when she felt herself shrink away from him. Star, despite his small stature, was a man who could intimidate with just one look.

“There’s been a leak and I want to know where it came from,” he said, balling his hands into fists on the desk.

She almost shook her head. That’s how shocked she was. They’d been so careful, so selective in their screening process that she couldn’t figure out what had been leaked and where it could have come from. Even more perplexing was the question of who had been dumb enough to run their mouth off. Everyone was scared of Star—no, terrified—and it would have to take a very, very stupid or reckless individual to break the oath of silence they’d all taken.

“What do you mean?” she asked, finally stepping into the office so she could shut the door.

“We’ve never had a breach like this before. After everything we pulled off to get here, all the secrets we kept in the early days of developing this plan, and not a single violation of trust. I thought we were past having to worry about something like this.” Star swiped the paper up and waved it at her. “Have you read this? Someone who came through quarantine overheard the guards talking about the test subject. Someone who knew his family!” He slapped the report on the desk. “I want to know who it was and I want them taught a lesson. Do you understand?”

“Yes.” Dr. Helton did her best to hang onto her professionalism, but she found her legs shaking under Star’s fury. “I’ll take care of it.”

“Good. Take this, although I doubt you’ll need it to find her. The woman is deaf, after all, and I can’t imagine we have many of those around here.” Star shook his head.

Star was right. In fact, there was only one deaf person in the entire settlement and Dr. Helton remembered Amira very well. She also recalled exactly which guards had been on duty the day the girl was brought in. She’d known that they’d run their mouths off in front of Amira, too stupid to realize that she might be able to read lips, but it had never occurred to the doctor that they might have leaked sensitive information. It was unheard of. Too foolish for her to have even considered.

“What kind of fallout can we expect from this?” she asked as she took the piece of paper Star had just slammed down.

He shook his head again, this time letting out a huff of impatience. “I don’t know how much the family believes, but I do know that Joshua is going to be accepting your offer of an apprenticeship soon. The family thinks it will give him an opportunity to poke around.”

She pressed her lips together when heat and anger flared through her. Dr. Helton had offered the position to Joshua weeks ago, knowing that they would eventually need new blood in the labs. He’d told her that he had no interest in research, though, and the idea that he was planning to use her offer in such a deceitful way made her seethe.

“I’ll tell him I already filled the position,” she said, not even bothering to contain her annoyance.

“No, let him have the job. I don’t want to raise any more red flags. Just keep an eye on him.” Star drummed his fingers against the desk. “There’s something else too, only I’m not sure where it came from. A rumor that James is alive.”

Dr. Helton blinked. That was a surprise. “How do you know?”

Star tapped the report with his index finger. “Lila heard a rumor at work. Remind me again what she does.”

Dr. Helton racked her brain. She was not only in charge of the observation wing and keeping tabs on their test subject, but all matters dealing with his family as well, which was turning out to be a bigger job than any of them had expected.

“I believe she works at the food center.”

“So someone there is whispering about James. Who, though? Who is foolish enough to spread rumors?” Star frowned. “Do we have any overlap between the CDC and the food center? Maybe someone with top secret access is sleeping with someone working there?”

“I’ll have to look into it.”

Dr. Helton could feel her day of research slipping away, and even though she knew that being annoyed with Star would do her no good, she couldn’t help it. She was a scientist, not a babysitter, but no matter how many times she asked that the responsibility for the family be pushed onto someone else, it didn’t happen. Star couldn’t trust anyone but her. Or so he said.

“Do it,” Star said. “And take care of the guards who ran their mouths off. I want to discourage anyone working in my inner circle from ever making the mistake again.”

“I’ll take care of it,” she said for what felt like the hundredth time.

“Good, then.” Star waved her off as he went back to his microscope, but before she’d even had a chance to leave the room he called out, “Jane.” When she looked back, he gave her a nod. “Thank you. I know I can trust you to do what needs to be done.”

“We’re on the same side,” she said, allowing her annoyance to melt away.

“I know, but I want you to know how much I appreciate it.”

Dr. Helton left the office feeling like a child whose father had just said he was proud of her, and something about it made the task ahead of her easier to visualize. She was on damage control today, which shouldn’t be too hard since the people involved were all relatively close.

Finding the guards was an easy task, but once their tongues had been removed from their mouths and the men had been deposited into holding cells, Dr. Helton was faced with the problem of Amira. The deaf girl shouldn’t have been a problem, and maybe she wouldn’t be, but the doctor knew that underestimating her would be foolish. They’d have to keep close tabs on her. Find out what she was doing and who she was talking to and make sure that she didn’t continue to raise suspicion about what was going on at the CDC.

“I want to know everything this girl does,” she told the men in the surveillance room. “Where she’s working and who she spends her time with, and I want you to make sure her apartment gets bugged tonight. Now if no one’s home.”

“We’ll have to get another person to listen if we do that,” the chubby man in front of her said.

They already had two guys on duty at all times so they could alternate between the three apartments occupied by James’s family, but the doctor knew that bringing a third person in would be no problem. There were plenty of people dying for a cushy job after months of near-death experiences.

“Get those bugs in place and I will get you the manpower. Understood?”

Both men nodded.

No one in this building would dare argue with Dr. Helton, which was how she liked it. She knew she came across as a cold person who wasn’t afraid to get her hands dirty, something she had proven earlier when she’d cut the guards’ tongues out herself, and it was a persona she’d worked hard to cultivate over the years. She’d been in on the ground floor of planning this apocalypse and she wasn’t about to do anything to risk her spot at this point, meaning she had to rule with an iron fist.

“Good,” she said as she turned and walked out.

She had to pass through the observation wing on her way to her office, but the trip was more than welcome. Not only did it give her a chance to check on the subjects they had injected with the most recent strain of the virus, but it also allowed her a glimpse of the two men who’d had their tongues removed. They were in rooms across from one another, which was another part of their punishment because it would give them an excellent view into the cell of the other person. The first man was curled up on the bed looking like he was praying to die, but the second one was standing at the window when she approached. His face and lips were swollen and purple from earlier, and the hate that swam in his eyes when he met Dr. Helton’s gaze almost made her laugh. He had been the one idiotic enough to discuss top-secret information in front of a survivor, yet he was angry with her? He was even dumber than she’d thought.

She met his glare with one of her own but he didn’t back down. He had guts, she had to give him that. Few men would still be standing after having their tongues cut out, let alone have the balls to stare her down the way he was right now. Not that it mattered. She would relieve him of that glare soon enough. By the time they were finished with this man, he would be nothing but a ball of agony.

“We’ll be injecting the other man this evening,” she told the nurse at the end of the hall. “I want his friend here to watch as he turns.”

The woman with the clipboard, Helen was her name, nodded once before hurrying away.

Dr. Helton smiled before turning her back on the man. His glare was still as fiery as ever, but she didn’t miss the fear that shimmered in his eyes.

The cell next to him held the test subject she’d injected this morning right before being summoned by Star and they were already seeing results. He was currently writhing on the floor, his mouth open in silent screams as the virus worked its way through his body. This particular virus was a mutation of the original and the man on the other side of the glass was only the second person lucky enough to be infected by it.

The first person was in the cell next to him. He’d been injected only a week earlier but had already turned. The difference between this strain and the original was that it had changed him before his heart had stopped beating. He’d become violent while still alive, had attacked anyone who’d come into the cell. They’d thought they’d found a missing piece of the puzzle with the mutation, but he had eventually succumbed to the virus and was now slowly rotting away just like all the others. Still, Star was hopeful that this particular strain would affect someone the way he wanted it to. He was even talking about releasing the mutated virus to see how it affected the general population. Dr. Helton wasn’t sure how she felt about that, but he was the man in charge.

With the exception of turning the patient before the heart stopped beating, this strain seemed to be no different than the first one, but their hope was that the blood of Angus James would help them find the piece they’d been missing. They wanted the virus to change the man but not kill him completely. They wanted mindless drones who would follow orders unquestioningly, who wouldn’t feel pain, and who would serve Star.

When she reached his cell she found Angus James awake and lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling as if it held some special interest to him. She paused and watched, wondering for a moment what he was doing. Until then it hadn’t occurred to her how empty his cell was. He had nothing at all that would help him pass the time. Perhaps books would be a nice addition to his cell. She had no qualms about torturing a person, but she also didn’t see the harm in giving him something to do. It would keep him from going insane if nothing else.

Somehow, though, she doubted Star would agree to the request. She wasn’t stupid, she knew that the man she’d chosen to follow was a sociopath, but she’d once heard that as much as four percent of the population had sociopathic tendencies and she supposed that she had a little bit of that inside her as well. She had, after all, aided him in releasing a virus that wiped out most of the human race and had never even lost a minute of sleep over it.

James glanced her way just as she was about to turn to leave. His gray eyes captured hers and Dr. Helton found herself suddenly frozen as she stared back at him. Those eyes told a story that was both captivating and frightening. There was so much violence and pain and regret in the look he gave her that she had the sudden desire to know everything about him. Where he’d come from and who he’d been before the virus was released. It was clear just by talking to him that James was not an educated man, and she’d pictured him giving up much easier than he had. But he was holding on better than anyone had expected. He did as he was told thanks to the threat she’d made against his family, but the defiant look in his eyes never faded, and he always gave the impression that he was preparing to strike, like he was a rattlesnake shaking it’s tail, warning them that the second he had the chance he would take them all down with his venom.

She almost felt bad that he’d never have the chance to try.

“Dr. Helton?”

She turned at the sound of her name, ripping her gaze from James’s. “Yes?”

Helen stood in front of her with a syringe in one hand and a new clipboard in the other. She was a withered woman, not nearly as old as her skin made her look. Even though they hadn’t interacted much, Dr. Helton could picture exactly the type of person this nurse had been before the virus. A party animal that had stayed up all hours of the night and spent too much time in the sun during the day. She’d been a professional during work hours, but at night she had spent her time drinking and smoking her youth away, crawling into bed with any man who was willing to show her some affection. It was pathetic, but that was the kind of person you wanted in a position like this. The kind who craved acceptance, who would do anything they were told to do and not bat an eye because the idea of being cast aside was more terrifying than doing something illegal or immoral. Helen fit that description to a T, which was why Dr. Helton planned on keeping her around even though the woman had requested to be moved away from the observation wing.

“I have the virus you requested,” Helen said. “I also wanted to let you know that Dr. Joshua Patrick left a message asking for you to call him.”

“Very good,” the doctor said, taking the syringe. “I’ll return his call after we finish here.” She glanced past Helen to the guards. “I’m going to need your assistance.”

The apprenticeship with Dr. Helton hadn’t been his idea, but it didn’t take long for Joshua to realize that it had been a good one. It was challenging, something he hadn’t expected during the zombie apocalypse, and not only did it help distract him from the destruction Anne had caused when she’d ripped out his heart, but it gave him more insight into what was happening inside the CDC. He hadn’t been admitted to the more top secret areas of the building yet, but he’d learned more about the virus than he’d ever known before and about how it killed. He’d wondered how the new antibiotic developed by the CDC could possibly work on a virus—it hadn’t made sense when viruses were impervious to antibiotics. He’d learned quickly, though, that when the virus had been released on the world it somehow managed to supercharge most of the bacteria out there, and that was what was actually infecting newborn babies. Infections that had at one time been simple for bodies to fight off now ravaged immune systems, and if it weren’t for the antibiotic the CDC created, the babies born these days would continue to die, eventually wiping out the human race once and for all.

Joshua had been working with Dr. Helton for nearly seven months, shadowing her for eight hours a day seven days a week, when the girl was brought in. He spent most of his time these days deep within the CDC, back where the research labs sat waiting for great discoveries to be made and where things tended to be quieter, but the uproar that followed this girl seemed to nearly shake the entire building.

He was bent over a microscope studying the way the newest vaccine affected the virus when it happened. Doors in the hallway were thrown open and people came rushing in. A filthy woman with white-blonde hair was yelling and crying as she ran next to a gurney, and on the bed was a girl whose arm was covered in blood. She was staring at the ceiling with wide, unblinking eyes that left no doubt in Joshua’s mind what had happened to her.

Dr. Helton, who was also bent over a microscope, glanced up at the commotion, and it only took one look at the scene for her to come to the same conclusion he had.

“She’s been bitten,” the doctor said.

She jumped to her feet before Joshua could respond and swiped a syringe off the counter along with a vial of the experimental vaccine, and then she took off running.

Dr. Helton was a stoic woman, perhaps even more so than Parvarti, who Joshua knew had been capable of emotion at one point in her life. But unlike his roommate, the doctor gave off the impression that she just might be a cyborg or some other kind of machine that used to exist within science fiction novels. She didn’t smile, didn’t react to bad news the way most people did, and barely blinked when they had any kind of setback in the lab. Everything that came her way seemed to be a puzzle that she challenged herself to solve, and even though Joshua didn’t trust her for a second, he had to admire her genius. She was without a doubt the most brilliant person he had ever worked with.

Now, though, she was tearing down the hall after the group like a bat out of hell.

He hurried after her on instinct, not sure what was about to happen but knowing that he wanted to be there. Over the cries of the woman who Joshua assumed was the mother of the child, he could hear Dr. Helton and a nurse, Helen he thought her name was, yelling back and forth to one another.

“How long ago was she bitten?” the doctor asked.

“Less than an hour. They were right outside the wall when it happened and the guards were able to get them inside quickly.” Helen had the girl’s wrist in her hand as she ran, two fingers poised to keep tabs on her pulse. “Her heart rate is slow, but steady.”

“Good. She’s the perfect candidate.”

That’s when it hit Joshua what was about to happen. They were going to inject this girl—who couldn’t be more than five years old—with the vaccine. With the experimental vaccine.

He ran faster, his heart beating right along with the thump of his feet on the floor. He was torn between the desire to see if the drug would work the way he hoped it would, and the urge to stop this from happening. This girl, this child, was too young to be experimented on, and the vaccine was so new that no one outside the labs even knew it existed. It wasn’t even the first one they’d created. They’d been through several stages with the drug, all of which had failed, and even though this one—AJ200 they were calling it—seemed promising, their initial tests were still too new to even consider testing it on a human being. At least in his opinion.

The group reached a room and the gurney was shoved through the door. Dr. Helton yelled for someone to move the mother back and Helen jumped at the order like she was a solider in the army, not a nurse who should have been looking out for the best interest of her patient. Once the mother was out of the way, Dr. Helton moved to the girl’s side. She checked the child’s pulse again before testing her reflexes and studying her pupils, and the whole time Joshua stood off to the side, too stunned to say a word.

“She’s been informed that the vaccine is still in the early stages of testing?” Dr. Helton said as she slid the needle into the vial. She pulled the plunger on the syringe back, and the liquid rushed in, bright green and thick.

“She has,” Helen said.

The doctor pulled the needle out and pushed the plunger just enough to make sure all the air was expelled. “Good.”

“You can’t be serious,” Joshua said, suddenly finding it impossible to stay silent.

Dr. Helton’s brown eyes snapped his way. The syringe was still poised in front of her, waiting and ready to be injected into the little girl’s vein. “She’s dead for sure without it. This way, she at least has a chance.”

She was right and Joshua knew it, but that didn’t mean he felt good about standing by and letting this happen. Do no harm, that was the oath he’d taken as a doctor, and he didn’t see how injecting an experimental vaccine into a child could possibly be categorized as doing no harm.

He turned to face the mother. “You’re okay with this?”

The woman’s face was streaked with tears and dirt, and her clothes were barely more than rags. Her blonde hair was matted and greasy and probably crawling with bugs. She looked like she’d been to hell and back a dozen times.

“Yes,” she gasped. “Do it. Do anything.”

Joshua could almost picture the woman handing a ticket to the devil as she climbed aboard the one-way train headed for hell. The crazy thing was, the devil looked a heck of a lot like Dr. Helton.

The doctor tossed the now empty vial aside and took a deep breath. Her hands were steady when she approached the little girl. The child was so lethargic that it was obvious the virus had already worked itself deep inside her bloodstream.

Suddenly, Joshua was reminded of another girl and another time. Emily. When he’d first met Vivian, getting to the daughter she’d given up had been Vivian’s only goal. A child she hadn’t seen in four years who was all the way on the other side of the country. Even in his slightly shocked state Joshua had thought it was noble, and as he’d gotten to know Vivian more, he’d come to understand that everything she did had a deeper purpose. It was as if she was trying to right every wrong she’d ever witnessed by living her life to help others, even at her own peril.

When Emily had been bitten they’d all watched in helplessness as she had slipped into a coma-like state. No one had known what would happen to her back then. If she would turn into a monster who wanted to kill them all or if she would simply die, and as the only doctor in the group, Joshua had felt so helpless that he’d hated himself. Hated that all his medical training hadn’t prepared him for this world. Hated that he hadn’t been able to pull a miracle out of a hat like some kind of magician. It was a feeling that only grew more and more intense as the weeks and months went by and more and more things that were out of his control happened. Watching children die from illnesses that had previously been easily treated, seeing friends die from complications of childbirth when any hospital in the old world could have taken care of it. He’d gone into medicine to make a difference, but in the apocalypse he had felt like a fraud.

He held his breath when Dr. Helton slid the needle into the child’s vein. The girl didn’t even react. Didn’t flinch or blink or suck in a deep breath. Not even when the doctor pushed the plunger and the green liquid rushed into her body.

Dr. Helton stepped back and the nurse released the mother. The woman ran to her child’s side, sobbing.

“How long?” Helen’s voice belonged to someone much older than her and Joshua could tell that this woman spent a lot of her free time smoking.

“We should see results in an hour if it’s going to work.”

The expressions of the two women standing next to him were very different. Dr. Helton was all business, a scientist who was waiting for results, while Helen looked at the sobbing mother with nothing but compassion.

“I’ll stay with them,” the nurse said. “Let you know what happens.”

Dr. Helton nodded once. “Good. Thank you.”

She left the room without a second glance at the child, and Joshua followed. She didn’t speak until they had reached the end of the hall.

“If you can’t do this job, I need to know now. Things are different. Before this outbreak we had to jump through hoops and wait for approval for human trials. Developing drugs took years. We don’t have years anymore. We have today. Now. I know it seems callous to inject a child with a drug when we have no idea if it will help her, but when we’re facing death, I will take the experiment every time. Most people these days would.”

She was right. People were desperate and Joshua knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that if he’d been in the same position back when Emily was dying, he would have taken the chance at saving her, no matter how small.

“You’re right.” He squared his shoulders and Dr. Helton tilted her head back so she could look up at him. Something about this woman made him feel small even though he towered over her by more than a foot. “I can do this. I want to.”

“Good.” She turned and headed back down the hall.

The girl lived and hope bloomed in the settlement. People felt safer knowing that a bite no longer meant certain death, and for a few months after that the number of zombie attacks went up as more and more people began taking risks. Groups would leave the settlement to search for supplies and get overrun, and a day didn’t go by that someone wasn’t brought into the CDC with a bite.

Joshua was exhausted from working long days and nights, but even worse, he felt let down. The vaccine, which had seemed like a miracle to him at first, didn’t always work. In the beginning, he hadn’t been able to figure it out, but as he began to study his patients he noticed differences between them and a change in the virus. Some of the victims became violent before their hearts had stopped beating, almost as if they turned while still alive.

“It’s a mutated version of the virus,” he told Dr. Helton three weeks after the girl had been saved. “I’m sure of it.”

“Is that so.” She didn’t even blink when she took the report he’d prepared.

Something in her expression told Joshua that she already knew this, and he found himself taking a step back. Dr. Helton was aware that a mutated virus was out there and yet she hadn’t bothered telling him. What else was she keeping from him?

He’d been working in the CDC for nearly ten months and had kept his eyes and ears open, but he’d seen nothing to indicate that their earlier fears were true. There was no sign of Angus and no whispers about anyone being held against their will, and even though there were still parts of the CDC that he hadn’t gained access to, Joshua had begun to think that all their paranoia was totally unfounded. It was clear based on everything he’d done in the lab so far that they were working hard to create a vaccine.

But Dr. Helton’s reaction made all those questions pop back up. It had him wondering what was behind the locked doors that he wasn’t allowed to see. Were there labs back there? Were they were doing experiments he knew nothing about? Were there people? Zombies? What behind those doors was so secret that they had guards—Parv had been right about that, he’d seen them with his own eyes—living in the CDC?

“I’ll look this over,” the doctor said, “but it shouldn’t come as a surprise. These things happen and it’s very possible that whoever created this virus intended for it to mutate like this. Perhaps it’s a way of keeping us on our toes.” She nodded once as she tucked the report under her arm. “Good work today. Why don’t you go home and get some rest? You look tired.”

Joshua let out a deep breath, but he wasn’t sure if it was a sigh of frustration or exhaustion. “Yeah, I am.”

“We all are. This vaccine has created problems we didn’t foresee. Star’s working on new regulations for going in and out of the settlement in hopes of keeping people from being so reckless.” She shook her head. “After everything we’ve survived, it would be a waste to allow people to continue to commit suicide the way they have been.”

Joshua stayed where he was when she turned and walked away. The idea that Star—a man who controlled everything but was rarely seen—was thinking about limiting who could and couldn’t go outside the walls sent a shiver shooting through him. It seemed too controlling, like a dictator who wanted to keep his citizens in check.

Parvarti was in the living room when he got home. They’d been living together for months now and had fallen into an easy routine, and while there was nothing romantic going on between them, he felt comfortable enough to talk to her about almost anything. Joshua was still licking the wounds Anne had inflicted on him when she’d decided to stay in Colorado, and Parv hadn’t been the same since Trey died. They understood each other.

“You look like shit,” she said when he threw himself on the couch next to her.

“Thanks for taking my feelings into consideration.”

She shrugged, but unlike Vivian her coldness didn’t bother Joshua. He knew that Parv cared more than she was letting on or she wouldn’t be working the gate. To her, protecting the settlement meant keeping them safe. Their group, their family. A part of her had died when Trey was killed and she wanted to do whatever it took to make sure no one else went through that.

“Anything new?” She asked the same question every night but the little bit of optimism that had been in her voice in the beginning had faded to almost nothing.

“I don’t know…”

Parv sat up straighter. “What? Tell me.”

“There’s a mutated strain of the virus and I think Dr. Helton already knew about it.” He shook his head. “Star is also considering limiting who can go in and out of the settlement.”

“I know,” Parv said. “We were briefed on that today. The new measures will be in place starting tomorrow. I agree that it sounds harsh, but there have been too many zombie attacks. It’s putting everyone at risk and we’d be stupid to let it go on. From now on, people aren’t going to be allowed to go in and out whenever they want.”

She had a point, but something about it still felt wrong to Joshua. Like the stupidity of the survivors was playing right into Star’s master plan. Assuming he had one.

But Joshua was too tired to debate it and he wasn’t even sure if his brain was working well enough to think it all through. “I guess you have a point,” he said with a sigh.

They lapsed into silence that was comfortable and relaxing. Living with Parv had felt a bit off at first, but now he couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. Their personalities suited one another and he’d come to respect how cool she was under pressure. He even liked it a little.

Of all the pains the world had to offer, childbirth was the easiest to forget. Vivian knew that fact firsthand, both from her own experience with giving birth to Emily and from sitting by dozens of bedsides over the last several months. The population of New Atlanta was booming and more and more pregnant women were showing up every week, keeping her busy in her new profession.

All the women’s circumstances were different, some looked at the child they were about to bring into the world as a blessing while others looked at it as just another thing that had gone wrong in their lives, but the end result had become achingly similar. Either the baby lived and the agony and fear was erased by the joy of the new life or the baby died and the pain was overshadowed by the realization that things in this world were still dire.

“Almost there, Lila,” Vivian said in the soothing tone she reserved for the laboring women she waited on. “Just a few more pushes.”

Her friend’s face was red and dotted with sweat, and she was exhausted from the long night of almost constant contractions, but the end was near and she was doing well.

“I’ll get the blankets,” Debbie, the head midwife, said. “We’ll have a baby any minute now.”

Vivian nodded, not taking her eyes off Lila. The contraction subsided and her young friend took advantage of the break by lying back and closing her eyes. Al stood on her other side, holding her hand with the only one he had, his stump resting at his side as a reminder of how close this moment came to never happening.

Debbie had been right when she said the baby would be arriving any time, because less than ten minutes later Al and Lila’s son came into the world screaming. It was a good sound because it meant he was healthy and strong, but that didn’t stop Debbie from whisking the baby away so she could check him over and administer the new antibiotic the CDC had developed. Even with the drug babies were dying at an alarming rate, but the deaths were becoming less and less frequent, and if the baby was going to succumb, they would know soon. It usually took less than ten minutes for symptoms to develop.

“Is he okay?” Lila asked, straining in a futile attempt to see her baby.

“He looks good,” Vivian said, doing everything she could to ease her friend back onto the bed, “but we need to keep an eye on him.”

Lila tried a couple more times to look past her, and when that didn’t work she turned to Al. “Check on him. Make sure he’s okay.”

“I’m on it.” Al gave his wife a quick kiss on the forehead before taking off.

“Tell me he’s going to make it,” Lila said as she watched Al disappear from the room in search of their son.

“You know I can’t,” Vivian replied, hating that she had to say the words but knowing she couldn’t promise something that she had no control over. If she told Lila everything would be okay and the baby died, she would never be able to forgive herself. “But we’ll know soon.”

Lila laid her head back and shut her eyes while Vivian went about cleaning everything up.

This was the first birth she’d attended where she actually knew the parents, and if she were being honest she’d admit that she preferred working with strangers. Giving the mothers bad news was hard enough when she barely knew them, and if she had to tell Al and Lila that their baby was going to die, she wasn’t sure she’d ever get over it. That was one thing that had never occurred to her when she’d started this job, and one she wished she could change.

“How much longer?” Lila asked, breaking the silence.

Vivian looked toward the clock. “A few minutes. Debbie will come back when she knows something.”

Knowing how cold mothers could get after delivery, Vivian took a second blanket to the bed. Lila was already shivering, but the young mother was so worried about her baby that she didn’t seem to notice it.

“Here,” Vivian said, spreading the blanket over her and tucking it in.

“We’re going to name him Luke,” Lila said, her teeth chattering together and distorting the words. She was still staring at the door. Waiting. “It was Al’s brother’s name.”

“I like it.” Vivian took a seat at her side and eased her friend’s hand into hers.

“I thought about naming him after my dad, but I barely knew him or my mom.” Lila turned and looked at Vivian. “It kind of makes losing them worse.”

“I’m sure.”

When footsteps sounded in the hall, both women turned to stare at the door expectantly. Vivian held her breath as they waited, once again saying a prayer to that faceless entity in the sky in hopes that He actually was there and listening to her.

A second later Al walked into the room holding a little bundle wrapped in a blue blanket and grinning from ear to ear. “He’s perfect.”

Lila let out a little sob as she pulled her hand from Vivian’s grasp and held her arms out for the baby. Al was beaming when he slipped the baby into his wife’s arms, and the tears that shimmered in his eyes told Vivian that this was a private moment.

She slipped from the room, grateful that this had turned out the way she’d hoped it would. It was a relief, not just for the couple she’d just left, but for herself as well. She wasn’t pregnant yet, but she and Axl had been trying for nearly seven months now and she knew that she might find herself in the same situation any day now. Hopefully, this delivery was a sign that things had finally made a turn for the better and the babies from here on out would survive.

She was exhausted by the time she dragged herself out of Al and Lila’s, and thrilled beyond words that all she had to do to reach her own apartment was walk across the hall. It was close to five o’clock in the morning and it had been a long night, but she knew the day ahead of her would be even longer. She’d only be able to grab a two hour nap before Axl had to head into work himself, leaving her alone with a ten month old who was doing her best to explore every inch of the apartment. Learning to crawl had made Megan adventurous and twice as exhausting as she’d been before, but even in her tired state Vivian had to admit that she was enjoying the challenge motherhood had brought her.

She’d only taken one step across the hall when Parv came out of the apartment she shared with Joshua. The other woman stopped outside her door and looked Vivian over before turning her gaze to the apartment she’d just left.

“Lila had her baby?” Parv asked, her gaze frozen on the closed door.

Vivian had almost gotten used to the lifeless tone the other woman’s voice had taken on. Had almost forgotten that there was a time, no matter how brief, when Parv had been content with the lot life had given her. Thinking back to the timid college student they’d picked up on Route 66 in the early days of the outbreak, it was hard to believe that had been her. She’d changed so much after Trey’s death that it almost seemed like she had died as well.

A few times over the last ten months Vivian had thought that Parvarti and Joshua might be able to comfort one another. They shared an apartment, and like Parv he was nursing a serious case of heartbreak, plus their dispositions seemed to compliment one another so well. Thinking of them as together came naturally to Vivian. Nothing had happened, but she wasn’t sure if they were in denial or if they were both just too broken to ever allow themselves another shot at happiness. She hoped, for all their sakes, that wasn’t the case.

“A boy,” Vivian said, smiling despite her exhaustion. “He’s healthy. No sign that the virus is going to take him. They named him Luke.”

The news was met with a nod. “Good.”

Vivian waited for Parv to say more, but the seconds ticked by and nothing happened. It irked her, but she’d been up all night and was way too tired to try and draw Parvarti out of her shell.

“She’s exhausted, and she’s not the only one.” Vivian rolled her shoulders back and cringed at the way they popped. “I’ll see you later, Parv.”

She’d only taken one step when the other woman called out to her, and Vivian turned to find Parv’s previously indifferent gaze now intensely focused on her.

“We could use you out there, you know,” she said. “You’re a good shot. Strong. Reliable.”

This wasn’t the first time Parv had tried to talk Vivian into working the wall, but she wasn’t interested. “I’m happy with what I’m doing.”

“But why?”

Memories of all the months they’d spent on the road came back, strong and fast, nearly taking her breath away. Parv should know why, she’d been right there at Vivian’s side the whole time, but maybe she was incapable of understanding. They all dealt with death and loss differently, and Parv’s way of coping had always been to fight it while Vivian’s had been to try and work to make things better, hoping that the good things just might one day overshadow the bad.

“I want to leave the death and blood behind,” she said, letting out an exhausted sigh. “This job gives me hope. Hope that things will get better. For once, I’m bringing life into the world. It’s nice.”

“It can’t be that much better,” Parv nodded toward Lila and Al’s apartment. “Half the time, they die.”

She had a point. Vivian had seen too many heartbreaking moments in the last ten months to count them all, but they hadn’t all ended that way. “But half the time they live.”

Parvarti shook her head like she thought Vivian was a fool. “I have to go. My patrol starts in ten minutes.”

She was already headed down the hall when Vivian said, “Okay.”

She watched her friend walk away, not moving until she had disappeared into the stairwell even though she was so tired her eyes burned with the need for sleep. It made her sad that Parv was still so hard, but Vivian had to hope that eventually the other woman would find something to make her happy. Whether or not Joshua was the answer, she didn’t know for sure, but there had to be something. Otherwise, what was the point of going on?

By lunchtime Vivian was considering a nap. The day had been even more exhausting than Vivian had expected, and she was having a difficult time keeping her eyes open because Megan was out cold and the apartment was deathly silent. Before she could make up her mind, though, someone knocked at the door. The last thing Vivian wanted was to make small talk with a visitor when she was feeling this exhausted, but she dragged herself up off the couch anyway, afraid that if she ignored whoever was at the door they’d keep knocking and wake Megan. Then she would be stuck with a fussy baby and an unwelcome guest.

She opened the door and found herself staring into the face of a total stranger. The woman was tall and slim, and maybe only a few years older than Vivian. She had blonde hair that was so pale it looked almost silver, and strikingly pale blue eyes, so light that they seemed almost colorless. Her eyebrows and lashes were the same shade as her hair, giving her eyes a hairless look that brought a lizard to mind, and she had skin that was the purest shade of ivory Vivian had ever seen. It was so white, in fact, that she couldn’t help wondering where this woman had come from. If she was like most of the other people in this settlement she’d traveled here from somewhere, but Vivian couldn’t imagine a person with such a fair complexion making it here without being turned into a lobster. Even Jim, who hadn’t been this light to begin with, had shown up scorched by the sun, but this woman looked as if she’d never seen the light of day.

The woman’s blue eyes looked Vivian up and down three times before she finally spoke. “I’m looking for Axl James.”

“He’s working,” she said, taken aback by the brusque way the woman seemed to dismiss her as anyone important. “Can I help you?”

“Who are you?”

In her exhausted state Vivian had a hard time biting back the retort that this woman had knocked on her door and wasn’t really in any position to throw questions at her. Instead, she took a deep breath and said, “I’m his wife. Vivian.”

The woman blinked twice before smiling. “How lovely to meet you. I was wondering if I could come in.”

Vivian almost shut the door right then. Something about this woman rubbed her the wrong way and she was functioning on only two hours of sleep. The last thing she wanted was a bi-polar guest who didn’t seem to understand the basics of social niceties.

But the woman was smiling now and she seemed harmless, so Vivian nodded and pulled the door open the rest of the way, allowing the woman to enter. She only took two steps in before pausing to look around, the expression on her face oddly reverent. Almost as if she was stepping into a church instead of their living room.

Vivian did the polite thing and asked the woman to sit. She did, balancing on the edge of the couch cushion with her back as straight as a board while Vivian took the chair across from her. The woman had yet to introduce herself, which would have been odd if she hadn’t already proven that she had no idea how to interact with other people in a social setting.

“What is it I can do for you?” Vivian asked instead of bothering with names.

“I just wanted to talk,” the woman said. Her eyes were lit with excitement and wonder, and they wouldn’t stop scanning the room. “So this is where Axl James lives.”

It wasn’t a question, and it made Vivian’s back stiffen. Did this woman have some kind of crush on Axl? Had she just let a stalker into her home?

She shifted as she glanced at the hallway that led to the bedrooms. Megan was asleep and there was no way this woman could get to the baby without passing Vivian first, and she took comfort in the fact that she had a knife hidden under the cushion of the very chair she was sitting in. Old habits died hard, and even though the wall surrounding New Atlanta seemed secure, Vivian and Axl had taken measures to ensure that weapons would never be far from their grasp—something that would have to change once Megan started walking.

“How do you know my husband?” Vivian asked instead of pulling the knife.

“Oh, I don’t.” The woman turned her pale eyes on Vivian and in the dim light of the room her lashes were totally undetectable. “Let me explain. My name is Ruth Ann Gillespie. My daughter and I traveled here from Florida when we heard about the safe zone. She’s five. It took weeks, but I was determined to keep her safe. I did a good job, too, at least until we reached the wall. We couldn’t find the entrance—”

Ruth Ann paused as if the memory was hard to talk about and Vivian recounted her own arrival. How they’d been met with the same reality: they’d reached the wall but were unable to find a way in. How they’d been so close, and yet so far at the same time. That’s when disaster had struck, when the zombies had surrounded them and Angus had put his own safety on the line to save everyone else. It was why he was no longer with them.

Ruth Ann let out a deep breath before going on. “The city was full of zombies. I tried to climb the wall, but I couldn’t do it and before I knew it we were cornered.” The woman’s icy eyes shimmered, reminding Vivian of the sun reflecting on a frozen pond. “I tried to put myself between the dead and my daughter, but one of them got her and pulled her out from behind me. Before I could do anything she was bitten.”

Vivian gasped, thinking about holding Megan close to her body when they’d reached the wall. She’d only been a few days old then and she might have been killed—along with the rest of them—if it hadn’t been for Angus, but this woman had had no one to help her.

“I’m so sorry,” Vivian said, putting her hand on Ruth Ann’s arm in the hopes that it would comfort her. “I can’t even begin to imagine how you feel.”

The woman smiled and the icy tint of her eyes seemed to sink into Vivian, chilling her to the bone.

“I feel amazing and it’s all thanks to your husband’s brother. Angus James saved my daughter’s life.”

Vivian’s hand slipped off the woman’s arm and she had the urge to shrink away form her.

Angus was dead, so it took Vivian a moment to realize that Ruth Ann was talking about the vaccine. Joshua had told them that the very first person to receive it had been a young girl who’d been bitten on the way into the city.

“Your daughter was the first person to receive the vaccine,” she said as understanding dawned on her. Maybe this woman wasn’t as crazy as she’d originally seemed.

“Yes!” Ruth Ann’s exclamation echoed through the silent apartment and Vivian found herself holding her breath, waiting to find out if Megan would wake and start crying. She didn’t, but Ruth Ann wasn’t done either. “Angus’s blood saved my daughter and I was so grateful that I found myself thinking about him more and more, and this feeling just came over me. It was like he was there, watching over us. Smiling down on us. I could sense him in the halls of the CDC, and before long I found myself talking to him. At night before I went to bed, I would whisper my thanks, but it took me a few weeks to realize that I was praying to him.”

“Praying?” Vivian whispered. “To Angus?”

“Yes.” Ruth Ann stood and Vivian had to lean back so she could look into the woman’s eyes. “And he responded. Not out loud, but in my head. I could hear him talking, whispering the truth in my ear. He was chosen by God to save us. He was given the gift of immunity so that He could save the human race, and my daughter was chosen as the first person to receive the vaccine so I could spread the truth. That Angus will one day come back and save us again. He’ll deliver us from the zombies and bring about a new paradise on Earth.”

Vivian’s mouth hung open. She couldn’t think of a response because it was all too insane. This woman was insane. Vivian had known Angus well, and even though he’d come around in the end and done some good, most of the time he’d been a racist hothead who had only cared about himself. If anyone was going to be chosen by God to save the world, it sure as hell wasn’t going to Angus James.

She got to her feet. “I think you should leave.”

Ruth Ann blinked when her eyes focused on Vivian. “What do you mean?”

“I’m not comfortable with this and I want you to leave.”

“But I’m here to tell Axl that his brother will come back. Angus sent me. He wants Axl to be part of this and help lead everyone in the settlement to the truth.”

“That’s not going to happen.” Vivian moved past the woman so she could open the door. “Leave. Now.”

Ruth didn’t move at first and Vivian started to worry that there was going to be a confrontation. After a moment the woman finally headed for the door and when Ruth passed her, Vivian felt herself tense as if she was preparing for an attack—either verbally or physically, she wasn’t sure—but the other woman stepped out without another word.

Once she was in the hall, Ruth turned and said, “I know you’ll come around.”

Vivian shut the door in her face. “Not likely.”

For a moment she just stood in the living room, dumbfounded by what had just happened. It was nuts to think that anyone would pray to Angus though, and after a few seconds she found herself laughing. She laughed so hard that her body shook from it and tears filled her eyes. They spilled over and ran down her cheeks. It was the most absurd thing she’d ever heard, and the more she thought about it, the crazier it seemed. She imagined people all over the settlement praying to Angus. Going to church on Sunday the way they used to so they could sit in pews and sing about the glory that had been Angus James.

That would be the day.

“We found her,” Star said when Dr. Helton stepped into his office, stopping her in her tracks.

“Who?” she asked.

As usual, he was behind his desk. He rarely got up from it and Dr. Helton suspected it had something to do with his stature. A habit leftover from long ago, perhaps, because these days it didn’t matter how vertically challenged he was, Garrett Star was a giant among men.

“The girl we’ve been looking for. The one in Key West.” Star huffed and shook his head. “She’s alluded us for nearly a year. It’s about time they found her.”

The girl was a seventeen-year-old kid who had turned up only a few weeks before they’d learned of Angus James’s existence, and the first person they’d discovered who was immune to a zombie bite. Right away they’d assembled a team in hopes of extracting her, but before they’d even had a chance to leave she’d been killed, or so the group down there had claimed. Rumors that the teen was on the run had persisted, though, so Star had sent a special team down to Florida in hopes of finding her. They’d been gone for nearly ten months.

“They’re bringing her back?” Dr. Helton asked.

Already she was thinking about which cells were open in the observation wing and where they would put the girl, as well as which strain to start her on after their initial tests. The girl was the only other person they’d been able to get their hands on since finding Angus James, and it would be nice to have more than one subject. It would also expand their research and help them gain a better understanding of what they needed to do to attain the results they were looking for.

“Should be here this evening. Phillips radioed when they reached Charleston.” Star let out a deep breath and something that almost resembled a smile followed. “We’re getting closer, Jane. I can feel it.”

Charleston was only three hundred miles away.

“I should get things ready for her arrival,” Dr. Helton said.

Star waved her off. “Yes. Do that.”

She was in the observation wing when the new test subject arrived. The girl was much smaller than Dr. Helton expected and she didn’t put up much of a fight when Phillips and the two other members of the team dragged her through the door. Perhaps the teen had had most of the fight beaten out of her on the way here, though. She did look worse for wear, like she hadn’t showered in months and had missed more than a few meals. She also had a gash on the side of her head and a black eye. The doctor had no qualms about getting rough with a prisoner if need be, but she wasn’t happy by how undernourished the girl looked.

“Where do you want her?” Phillips asked.

The woman was several inches shorter than Dr. Helton and rail thin, but she had a chip on her shoulder that made her seem twice as big. Like the prisoner, Phillips looked as if she’d been dragged through the ringer. Her clothes were torn and dirty and she had a cut on her cheek as well as cuts on the knuckles of her right hand, no doubt they went hand in hand with the bruise coloring the test subject’s eye.

“Last cell,” the doctor said, waving for them to follow her.

The girl’s eyes widened as they moved down the hall. They passed Angus, who was watching through his window, and then other prisoners who were all in various forms of decay. The dead banged their hands and heads against the windows as the group passed, leaving streaks of black blood behind. Some of the windows were so smeared with the stuff that it was hard to get a look at the creature inside the room. At the moment, every cell on the hall was full but one. The results of the last round of tests would be disposed of soon, though, and replaced with new, healthy subjects. When that happened, their rooms would have to be scrubbed down with bleach to remove the blood, urine, and feces left behind. Most of the subjects relieved their bowels when they died.

Dr. Helton stopped in front of the keypad and the girl began to cry. Phillips shook the teen roughly and growled at her to shut her damn mouth, but the doctor didn’t even blink. Neither emotional outburst bugged her.

When the door was pulled open, Phillips dragged the girl inside and Dr. Helton followed. The woman who’d been tasked with bringing the teen to the CDC shoved her onto the bed and glared as if daring the girl to get up.

“Now then,” Dr. Helton said as she looked down at her clipboard. “I need you to answer a few questions for me.”

The girl blinked, which the doctor took as consent and went on.

“Age?”

“Seventeen—” She swallowed. “Maybe eighteen. I’m not sure what the date is.”

“Either way.” The doctor scribbled the information down. “Are you ill in any way? Any pre-existing illnesses?”

The girl shook her head.

“Last period?”

“I’m not pregnant,” she muttered, and then looked down at her hands. “I haven’t had sex since Vince died.”

“That’s not what I’m asking. Having a regular menstrual cycle is an indication that you aren’t undernourished. When was your last period?”

The girl shrugged. “A couple weeks, I guess. It’s hard to keep track.”

The fact that she was still having them said something. She looked thin, but it was entirely possible that she’d been a slender person to begin with.

“Good,” Dr. Helton said as she jotted the information down. “We’ll need to draw some blood and get you cleaned up, but in the meantime I want to see the bite locations.”

The girl’s eyes shimmered as she looked back and forth between the doctor and Phillips. Dr. Helton waited patiently, unbothered by the hesitation—it wasn’t like she didn’t expect it—but Phillips was having none of it.

“Shit,” she muttered and shoved the girl down, who struggled against the woman’s grip to no avail.

The rip of fabric was loud, but the girl’s clothes were so tattered that the doctor doubted it had taken much effort to tear the shirt off.

Phillips tossed it aside and snapped, “The sooner we get this over with the sooner I can get a hot shower.”

The girl wasn’t wearing a bra and she tried to cross her arms as Phillips pulled at her pants, ripping them away in much the same way as she had the shirt. The girl’s face was crimson, but it didn’t matter. No one was interested in her breasts. It was the crescent shaped scars on her body that had Dr. Helton moving closer.

“So many,” she whispered, enthralled as she looked them over.

She counted five in all, three on the girl’s right arm and two on her left. Angus James had endured more, but it was still fascinating to see the deep scars the zombies’ teeth had left behind, especially knowing that most people would have died from just a tiny scratch.

Dr. Helton slipped her pen into the pocket on her lab coat and nodded. “Wonderful.” She focused on the girl. “You have a bathroom stocked with clean clothes and a shower with an unlimited supply of hot water. I suggest you use the next hour to get yourself cleaned up.” She eyed the girl’s hair and made a mental note to have someone shave her head. She was probably crawling with bugs. “Dinner will be delivered shortly and when I come back we’ll begin our tests.”

The girl blinked up at her. “That’s it?”

“Yes.” Dr. Helton nodded. “Don’t worry. We’re going to take good care of you.”

The girl let out a deep sigh of relief and Dr. Helton smiled. This child had no idea what was in store for her.

Over the next few weeks the teen learned exactly what was expected of her. Dr. Helton wanted to be able to compare her body’s reaction to James’s, so after the initial blood draw, the girl was injected with an older strain of the virus. It was a particularly nasty one that had her screaming in agony within ten minutes, but the effects didn’t wear off as fast as they had with James. He’d been back to his normal, sullen self within two hours, but the teenager screamed for nearly five.

Her body didn’t recover as quickly either, much to Dr. Helton’s dismay, and it only took two weeks to realize that the immunities in her blood were nowhere near as powerful as the ones James’s blood carried. Within a month her overall health had begun to deteriorate. Her hair, which had barely begun to grow back after being shaved, fell out and she had a difficult time even getting out of bed. Her skin took on a yellow tint that told them her liver was failing, and her lips were dry and cracked despite the fluids they pumped into her body through IVs.

“She isn’t going to make it,” the doctor told Star during their weekly strategy meeting. “I give her another week, perhaps less.”

Star exhaled and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Finding her felt so promising.”

“I know, but she isn’t strong enough. All her initial tests came back clean, so there doesn’t seem to be any underlying medical issue. I just don’t think she has the same level of immunity James has.”

“What about his brother’s blood?” Star asked. “How has the sample we took compared?”

“The same.” Dr. Helton sighed. “Axl James seems to carry the same antibodies as his brother.”

“What about bringing him in?”

She had known before she came into the room that Star would suggest bringing Axl in, and she was ready with her response. “I’ve given it a lot of thought and I don’t think it’s a good idea.” Star sat back and crossed his arms, waiting for her to explain herself. “For one, I think we need to keep him where he is just in case Test Subject 01 does begin to deteriorate. If we bring the brother in and lose them both we have nothing, but if Test Subject 01 dies and Axl is still free, we have a backup.”

Star nodded. “What else?”

“The family is too invested and I think it would draw suspicion. If it wasn’t for The Church—” She curled her upper lip in disgust. “—we might be okay, but they’re gaining footing in the settlement and they hold the James family in high esteem.”

“They’re a bunch of fools, but you’re right. They have influence that I never expected.”

Dr. Helton cleared her throat, preparing to bring up a plan that had come to her suddenly a couple nights ago. It was a bit out there, but it could work, and if it did it would put them way ahead of the game.

“I have another idea.”

Star arched his brows at her. “Go on.”

“We should breed James.” The startled look that crossed his face almost made her take it back, but she rushed ahead before she could talk herself out of the idea. “I know it sounds extreme, but this way we have a much greater chance of getting a test subject as resilient as he is. One who would have the same immunities and survive longer.”

“How would we go about doing this?” Star asked.

“We find a healthy host and inseminate her. It gives us all the control.”

Star inhaled slowly, never once taking his eyes off her, and when he exhaled she almost cringed. “I’ll give it some thought, but I’m not convinced it’s a good idea. There are too many things that could go wrong.”

There were too many things that could go wrong with everything they had done and planned to do, but that had never stopped them before. Not that Dr. Helton said this out loud.

Star uncrossed his arms and sat forward, indicating that the discussion was finished. “In the meantime, I’m moving forward with the prison settlement.”

“In DC?” she asked, knowing that it was useless to argue with Star.

“Yes. I want to have people ready when we finally do find the answer we’re looking for, and this is the perfect solution. It gives the illusion of law and order while preserving a group of people that will soon be useful to us.”

“Makes sense.” Dr. Helton honestly couldn’t have cared less about DC or anything else outside the walls of the CDC, but she gave Star the credit he was looking for. She rarely left the building she was now sitting in, and if he hadn’t kept her informed on what was happening in the settlement, she would be totally in the dark.

“I’m also drafting a new law that will remove guns from inside the walls.”

She arched her brows at that. “How? Don’t you think people will resist?”

“Perhaps a little, and some will probably leave, but most will just grumble and go about their day. It’s for the greater good.” The smile that curled up Star’s lips was evil. “At least that’s how we’ll make it look.”

“How?” she asked again.

He waved his hand as if brushing the question off, but answered her anyway. “An altercation in the settlement and the death of a few innocent people. The usual stuff.”

She had to admit, Star knew how to manipulate people.

The shooting happened on a Monday, right around the time that most people were getting off work, which also just so happened to be the day that most people showed up to get their food rations.

Axl heard the commotion when he and Jim stepped out of the building they’d been working on, and his first thought was that there had been a breech. It had never happened before, but a part of him had been waiting for it, and when he heard the shouting the first thing he did was pull his gun.

“Where’s it comin’ from?” he asked Jim.

The other man didn’t bother pulling his own weapon, but instead took a long drag on his cigarette as he nodded down the street. “That way,” he said, smoke coming out with the words. “Toward downtown.”

“Shit.” Axl wasn’t sure if he wanted to head that way or ignore it and head home. He’d been up at the crack of dawn and was bone tired, but a part of him knew he needed to find out what was happening.

“Check it out?” Jim asked.

“Yeah.”

They headed that way in silence, Jim smoking while Axl gripped his gun tighter with each step he took. A heavy feeling had started in his gut that increased the closer they got. Whatever was happening, there was a lot of yelling going on.

When they turned the corner they found a group of people gathered outside the food center, yelling and shoving one another. The first thing he thought of was Lila, wondering if she was working and if she was safe, but then he remembered that it was Monday and his concern was suddenly transferred to his wife and daughter. Vivian had saved enough credits to buy a stroller only the week before and since then she hadn’t stopped talking about how nice the basket would be when she went to pick up their rations.

He was moving toward the group only a second later, and as if reading his mind, Jim was right there with him. The crowd got increasingly more violent as the minutes ticked by, and Axl knew it wouldn’t be long before the altercation got out of control.

He’d just reached the crowd when the first punch was thrown. A man whose face was bright red and dotted with sweat went down, but the guy who’d hit him wasn’t satisfied and was on the man a second later.

Fists flew after that, mixed with grunts and curses as the atmosphere grew more and more intense. Axl pushed his way through the crowd as best as he could, searching the faces he passed for anyone he recognized. Thankfully, though, they were all strangers.

The crack of a gunshot cut through the violence and he ducked on instinct. Behind him Jim swore and Axl looked back to see the other man covering his head with his arms as if he had some magical power and could shield himself from a bullet.

“Go, go!” Jim yelled, keeping his head low.

Axl moved, shoving people out of the way so he could get to the building. Jim was right behind him, both men keeping as low as possible. Another shot rang out and someone screamed. Ice moved through Axl’s veins that felt out of place amidst the fiery anger surrounding him.

They reached the edge of the crowd and he gave one final push, bursting through the throng and stumbling toward the front door of the food center. It was shut and when he grabbed the knob he found the door locked. He couldn’t see a single person through the window, and just as he was wondering if everyone inside had taken cover behind the counter, he spotted the stroller Vivian had worked so hard to save for.

Two more gunshots, one right after the other, cut through the yelling at his back and he spun around. Jim had his gun out now, reminding Axl that he was armed. He raised his, but had no idea who was doing the shooting or who they were shooting at. People had begun to run and the chaos surrounding them was so wild that it took him a minute to see the blood splattered across the pavement.

“Somebody’s been shot,” he called to Jim.

Almost out of nowhere a group of guards showed up, Parvarti among them. Her expression was as calm as ever and she had her gun out and ready. Like Axl, she seemed to be looking for zombies. Only there weren’t any. Just men and women who had let their emotions get out of control.

The door opened behind them. “Axl.”

He spun around to find Vivian standing in the open doorway. Like him she was holding a gun in one hand, but clutched tightly in her other arm was Megan. The toddler was crying as his wife tried to bounce her up and down in an attempt to keep her calm. Behind her the men and women who worked in the food center peeked up from behind the counter, Lila included.

Axl threw his arms around Vivian, more relieved than he ever thought possible that she was okay.

“Thank God you’re alright,” he said against her neck.

“What the hell happened?” Jim asked.

Vivian pulled back so she could put her gun away. She shifted Megan into a tighter embrace and the toddler settled down a little.

“There’s a flour shortage. People were upset.” She shrugged like it made no sense, which it didn’t.

Axl swore under his breath, aware that he needed to learn to control his language in front of their daughter. “People got shot over flour?”

“They just lost it,” Vivian said. “I was at the front of the line and I could hear people yelling. It got out of hand really fast.”

“Shit,” Jim muttered. He pulled a cigarette out and stuck it between his lips as he turned to survey the damage.

Two men were dead on the ground, both of them with bullets in their heads, while a third person, a woman, stared up at the blue sky with blank, lifeless eyes. Her shirt was painted red and the giant hole on the left side of her chest told them everything they needed to know. The fourth person was a kid who didn’t look older than ten. His head was in his mother’s lap as she sobbed over him. Just like the dead woman, his chest was covered in blood.

A handful of people were lying facedown on the ground, their hands secured behind their backs with zip ties. The guards didn’t seem to know what to do and Axl got it. They weren’t supposed to be police. They were supposed to be security. They were supposed to be keeping the zombies out, not keeping the people inside the settlement from killing each other.

He turned his back on the scene and eased Megan from Vivian’s arms, suddenly anxious to hold his daughter. She rested her little head on his shoulder and gripped his arms. Her heart was beating twice as fast as usual. This tragedy could have stolen the two people he loved most in the world and he hated that. Hated that most of the population dying hadn’t made the survivors any better than they’d been before. Hated that the zombies hadn’t sucked up all the evil for themselves.

“Let’s go home,” he said to his wife.

The announcement came only a day later in the form of a flyer on their front door. The Regulator, a self-important little prick whose smile was too wide for Axl’s taste, had put a new law up for a vote and the council had passed it with a unanimous decision. All citizens who wanted to stay in the settlement were required to turn in their guns. If a person had a permit to go outside the walls they could check the weapons out, but while inside it was knives only. Of course, Axl couldn’t help wondering how long it would be before the Regulator relieved them of those.

He stared at the flyer in disbelief. He’d been on the way to work when he’d found it and it had frozen him in place. Since they’d registered their weapons when they first arrived, the note specifically mentioned the four guns he and Vivian had in their possession. There were zombies right on the other side of the wall and this joke of a government wanted them to turn their guns over like it was nothing. He couldn’t imagine doing it.

A door down the hall opened and Jim stepped out.

“You see this?” Axl asked, waving the flyer.

Jim was shaking his head when he ripped a flyer off his own door. “Son of a bitch.”

“Yeah.”

Axl wanted to crumple it into a ball and throw it away, but he folded the flyer in half instead and shoved it in his pocket. Vivian was still asleep and he didn’t want to wake her just to tell her about this bullshit, but he knew she’d find out from someone else while he was at work. Lila probably.

He and Jim headed out, each of them so lost in their own thoughts that they didn’t talk until they’d reached the little section of shacks that had sprung up in the absence of suitable housing.

“We can leave,” Jim said. He took a long drag off his cigarette, watching Axl out of the corner of his eye.

“We do that and we can’t come back.”

The new rules about leaving the city were strict. Too many people had gotten themselves bitten recently and the government wanted to reduce the risk of an infected person getting through the gates. Although after this new law, Axl found himself wondering if it was less about protecting the citizens and more about grabbing power.

“Maybe that’s better,” Jim said. “We can always go back to Colorado. Start over there.”

“Yeah,” he said, “maybe.”

But he knew that wouldn’t happen. They’d lost too many people on the way here and Vivian would never want to make that trip. She wouldn’t put Megan in danger and neither would he.

They passed a statue that had popped up out of nowhere only last week, but Axl barely noticed it. He was too busy thinking about what to do. The idea of giving up his gun made him sick, but he couldn’t see a way around it.

A whole mess of people chose their guns over the safety of the walls and the population dropped after that, but just like he’d thought, Axl and the group hung on. Not that he was totally happy about it. Not having a gun in the house made him itch. He had to find a way to get his hands on a gun.

The answer to his problem came accidently only a few days after they’d handed their guns over to the government. Mike popped up out of nowhere, going first to Joshua’s in search of a connection inside the CDC. The black market in New Atlanta was thriving, and he just so happened to be the number one guy to go to when you needed something you couldn’t get your hands on. Which gave Axl an idea.

The need for a black market had started with people wanting to get things from the outside without having to risk their necks, but as the rules in the settlement had tightened, it had grown into something more. When they’d come in through the front gate two years earlier, it hadn’t been a one-way trip. Back then the gate had been both an entrance and an exit to the city. But all that changed with Star’s declaration that people were no longer allowed to leave the city whenever they wanted. People now had to have permits to scavenge, and they weren’t always easy to obtain either. So men and women like Mike had become the in between, the ones who made connections with runners and stocked up on items that weren’t easy to come by. Which was why he needed Joshua’s help, so he could get his hands on the vaccines and antibiotics the CDC had locked away inside its walls.

When Joshua went to the Mike’s apartment to hammer out the details, he took Axl with him. The other man eyed him suspiciously when he walked through the door Joshua’s side.

“Who’s this?” Mike asked.

He was probably around thirty and had an edge about him that for some reason made Axl think he was ex-military, and he didn’t look happy that Joshua had let someone tag along.

“No worries. He’s good.” The doc waved at him dismissively.

Axl studied the apartment as Mike gave them his spiel. The place was lined with boxes that were stuffed full of random items ranging from booze to batteries to bags of chips. He wasn’t sure if Joshua could get his hands on the stuff this guy needed, but he knew that if he was going to get a gun, this was the guy who would be able to do it for him.

“Can you get it?” Axl asked Joshua.

The other man shrugged and nodded at the same time. “Sure. There’s no reason I can’t. If I want to, that is.”

“I can make it worth your while,” Mike said, which was exactly what Axl wanted to hear.

“How’s that?” Axl asked.

The other man frowned. “Are you a doctor too?” The expression on his face said he thought the idea was ridiculous.

“No.” Axl was focused on Joshua when he answered. He had no doubt that this guy thought he was too dumb sounding to be a doctor, but he didn’t give a shit. What he cared about was having a way to protect his wife and daughter.

Joshua, who seemed to be reading his mind, stared the guy down. “You didn’t answer the question.”

“A trade, man,” Mike said, acting as if it should be obvious. “Whatever you need.”

“Anything?” Joshua asked.

“Guns?” Axl elaborated.

Mike’s mouth twitched but his expression didn’t give anything away, so Axl was unprepared for how casually the answer sounded when it came out of his mouth. “Sure.”

Axl smiled, and in that moment a relationship was born.

Test Subject 02 was fading faster than Dr. Helton thought she would. She could barely get out of bed anymore and she couldn’t keep anything down, food or water. The girl had been hooked up to an IV for over a week, but she was wasting away right before the doctor’s eyes. The virus hadn’t turned her, but it seemed to be slowly decaying her body anyway, making her look more like a living corpse than some of the zombies they had in the other cells.

She smelled like death, too. That was the first thing Dr. Helton noticed when she entered the girl’s room. The second thing was that her eyes had taken on a milky shade that was eerily similar to the zombies.

The girl looked up and blinked like she was trying to clear her vision. “Please,” she said in a raspy voice. “Let me die.”

Dr. Helton nodded. “We will.”

The girl shut her eyes like keeping them open was too much work, and the doctor let out a sigh. Part of her wanted to inject the girl one final time just to see if she would eventually turn, but she knew it wouldn’t work and she didn’t want to waste the virus on a lost cause.

Instead, she nodded to the nurse who had followed her into the room. It wasn’t Helen anymore, although the doctor still had plans for her, but a younger much more eager woman. One who had been on the road for months, who had escaped from a casino in Vegas where she’d endured atrocities that made her want to never leave the safety of the CDC ever again.

The nurse knelt at the girl’s side just as Dr. Helton whispered, “Rest in peace, Test Subject 02.”

The girl opened her eyes when the needle slipped into her vein. “Anna. My name is Anna.”

It was the first time Dr. Helton realized that she had never bothered to ask the girl’s name.

“Sleep, Anna,” the doctor said, her voice taking on a softer tone.

When the nurse pushed down on the plunger, the lethal dose of morphine flooded Anna’s veins. The girl let out a deep breath and allowed her eyes to close one final time.

Dr. Helton left the cell and headed down the hall, stopping outside Test Subject 01’s cell. James had just come back from an MRI and was still out. He’d been nothing but cooperative over the last year, mostly due to the threat Dr. Helton herself had delivered, but he’d been so violent in those early days that they took extra precautions when he needed to be taken out of his cell for tests. Like they had today.

She and Star hadn’t discussed her idea of breeding James since that day in his office, but Dr. Helton had been unable to think of a better solution. The odds that they’d find someone with this level of immunity were slim, and the disappointment that Test Subject 02 had turned out to be was something Dr. Helton didn’t want to repeat. She knew that Star was still considering bringing the brother in, but Dr. Helton was afraid it would set off a chain of events that they wouldn’t be able to control. The Church was growing faster than they’d expected it to, and they held the James family in high esteem. Plus, if they brought the brother in, James might become much more difficult to control. He’d been cooperative thus far because she had assured him that his family was safe, but all of that would change if they went back on their deal. Dr. Helton was certain of it.

In her opinion, breeding James was the best option available to them. It would help them accomplish multiple goals, such as giving them a test subject who would stand a better chance of carrying the same immunities, as well as keep Axl safely where he was until they needed him for sure. It also had the potential for never-ending subjects if it was successful. They could breed James over and over again if need be, using multiple women to carry his offspring. The potential was endless.

But Star hadn’t warmed to the idea, and despite Dr. Helton’s request that he bring in a woman for them to inseminate, nothing had happened. She didn’t understand why he was dragging his feet on this. Yes, it would take a few years for the child to grow strong enough for them to use it for their experiments, but the sooner they impregnated a woman the closer they would be to their ultimate goal. Now was their chance, and in Dr. Helton’s opinion, waiting was foolish.

She watched James through the glass as she thought it all through, an idea forming in her head that was a bit out there, even for her, but plausible.

She could do it herself.

When she’d first had the idea of breeding Test Subject 01 it had never occurred to her that she could offer up her own body, but now it seemed like the obvious solution. Dr. Helton was healthy and young enough still, having just turned thirty-four last month, and there was no reason why she couldn’t be the one to do this. It was for science, after all, and she’d be following in the footsteps of great scientists like Jonas Salk and Elizabeth Fleischman Ascheim. Dr. Helton could do this. This was nothing compared to injecting yourself with experimental drugs. This was just sex.

If she was going to do it, though, she should just go ahead with it. James was half out of it now, but the drugs would wear off soon and then she would have to work harder. There was no time to lose. This was her chance.

“I’ll do it myself,” she said, her eyes still on James as she reached for the door. “I want to make sure the child is healthy.”

“Does Star know about this?” the nurse at her side asked, her voice shaking.

Dr. Helton couldn’t blame the girl for being worried. Star was a small man, but he could be an intimidating presence. It wasn’t just his cold stare or the fact that every word out of his mouth made him sound like he was bigger than life, either. He carried himself with authority, wearing his genius on him like a fine suit.

“Whose idea do you think it was?” she snapped, knowing that Star would see reason once she explained her actions to him. He had to.

She didn’t look back before stepping through the door. It was dark as she crossed the room, and the only sound that penetrated the silence was the heavy breathing of James. Dr. Helton stopped at the edge of his bed, looking the patient over. There were much more scientific ways of going about this, but this would perhaps be the most successful. She’d decided to take matters into her own hands, after all, and she wasn’t going to back out now.

She kicked off her shoes, leaving her socks on as she dropped her pants and underwear to the floor. The patient wore nothing but a hospital gown at the moment, so undressing him wasn’t necessary. All she had to do was push the fabric up around his waist and climb onto the table.

He groaned and tried to shift underneath her when she straddled him. His eyelids fluttered but didn’t open, and she knew that he was only partly aware of what was going on. James was in twilight sleep thanks to a combination of the drugs morphine and scopolamine. Once upon a time the same thing had been used on laboring mothers, allowing them to exist in a state somewhere between sleep and consciousness while they endured the pain of childbirth. While on the drug they could respond to commands when told to push, but they wouldn’t remember much of the pain associated with the process afterward. The drug was perfect for their current situation.

Dr. Helton wrapped her fingers around the organ hanging between his legs and James groaned again. This time when his lids fluttered, they opened. His gray eyes stared up at her, but they were glassy and unfocused. Confused.

She smiled as she moved her hand up and down. “Shhh,” she said, trying to keep her voice soothing. “Just lie back and try to enjoy it.”

He groaned again as he grew stiff in her palm, and when he was finally ready, she moved into position. She lowered her body onto his and they both sighed at the ecstasy of the feeling. It had been at least a year for him, but much longer than that for her, and she hadn’t been prepared for how good the act would feel.

Dr. Helton began to move up and down, slow at first but building momentum after only a few seconds. James was good-looking enough and the pleasure of a man’s company was something she hadn’t had in a long, long time, so she had no qualms about trying to enjoy the process even though she was doing this for science.

She felt her body rising higher and higher, finally falling over the edge and causing her to cry out as beneath her James grunted out his own pleasure. He closed his eyes as her body clenched around him, forcing his seed deep into her womb. His face scrunched up in either ecstasy or disgust, possibly both, but Dr. Helton didn’t care which it was. Not with her body still radiating with pleasure from the act, and not when she was one step closer to achieving her goal.

She waited to make sure he was done before rolling onto her back at his side, lifting her legs before any of the precious life-giving seed could escape. Dr. Helton knew she’d have to do this several more times, but she hoped it would be worth it and in just a few weeks she would get confirmation that his offspring was growing inside her. With any luck, the baby they created would have the same immunities that this man carried.

She stayed at his side for fifteen minutes before redressing. The nurse hadn’t left the window, but the knowledge that she’d watched the whole thing did nothing to chase away Dr. Helton’s triumph at the procedure. She’d give James time to recover and then come back later. The more they repeated the process, the more likely it was to be a success.

Dr. Helton went about her duties, keeping one eye on the clock as she arranged to have Test Subject 02’s body moved to the morgue for an autopsy. No matter what she did, though, she couldn’t stop thinking about James and how it had felt to have him inside her, and not even five hours had passed when she decided to make a return visit to his cell.

This time when she opened the door he was awake and sitting on the couch. He looked up when she slipped inside, studying her with uncertain eyes as if he was trying to figure something out. Did he remember? Twilight sleep would make it difficult, but it was possible he had some fuzzy memories of what had happened between them. Perhaps, though, he thought it had been a dream.

“How are you feeling?” she asked when she stopped in front of him.

“Like shit. Hate them drugs.”

“They’re necessary.”

She lowered herself onto the couch at his side, suddenly uncertain about what she was doing there and totally unsure of how to proceed now that he was awake. James watched her closely from the corner of his eye, almost as if he knew what was about to happen and he wasn’t sure how he was going to react. She wasn’t sure either, but she doubted he would put up much of a fight. He was a man after all, and he had needs. Needs that she could meet.

When she reached over to untie his pants, his entire body stiffened.

“What’re you doin’?” he asked as he tried to push her hand away.

“You agreed,” she said, working to loosen the string so she could reach past the waistband. “You agreed to give us complete access to your body whenever and however we need it. This is how I need it.”

When she slid her hand inside he stiffened even more, but this time it was right where she needed it to be. He was already hard when she freed him from his pants, and Angus watched her closely as she moved her hand up and down his length, readying him for the next step. He didn’t protest, didn’t try to move away, but there was no pleasure in his eyes. Instead they were filled with hate and resentment, with disgust.

“Enjoy it,” she whispered.

She stopped what she was doing so she could stand, and once she was naked from the waist down, she straddled him. She held his gaze as she lowered her body onto his, but once he was inside her he closed his eyes and groaned. His jaw was tense and he looked ready to bite her head off, but he didn’t try to stop her. In fact, he did nothing.

Dr. Helton began to move up and down, drawing ragged breaths from the man under her as he fought to remain in control. There was a battle raging inside him, she could see it written in every inch of his body. The way his hands were clenched at his sides, the tense way he held himself as she moved faster. He wanted this, loved it, but he didn’t want to give in. He didn’t want to lose himself this way.

She moved faster as her body neared release, crying out so loudly when she came that it echoed through the room. She closed her eyes and grasped his shoulders as she tried to steady herself, concentrating on the waves of pleasure shooting through her.

Her eyes were still shut when she felt his hands on her hips, and she opened them to find angry pools of gray focused on her face. A second later James lifted her, flipping her onto her back and towering over her, staring down at her with hate-filled eyes.

Then he took control, his fingers digging into her hips as he began to move. He picked up speed, driving into her with the force of his fury, almost as if he could take all the pent up anger and frustration and pain of the last year out on her. As if he could punish her if he moved fast enough.

It felt amazing, having this man drive into her, better than anything she’d ever experienced. She came again, screaming in pleasure just as he slammed into her one final time. Their moans and grunts mixed together in the quiet room and echoed off the walls, coming back to haunt them both.

James was still panting when he pulled out of her. He got to his feet and this time when he stared down at her, there was no anger in his eyes. There was only sadness.

Only a second later he turned his back on her and headed to the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

Dr. Helton stayed where she was and lifted her legs once again, hugging her knees to her chest while she replayed what had just happened. It had been unexpected, her enjoying the act the way she had. Yes, she had appreciated it earlier as well, but in an abstract way. It had felt good, she was a woman after all, but this had been different. This had been something she couldn’t quite put a name to.

The fifteen minutes on the couch was more than enough time to compose herself, and after she had gotten dressed she headed to Star’s office knowing that she had to let him know what she was doing before he heard it from someone else.

He was at his desk as usual, pouring over reports and slides from their most recent tests. She stopped behind him and even though he didn’t look up, she could tell by the stiffening of his shoulders that he knew someone had walked in.

She waited only a moment before saying, “I’ve gone forward with the next part of the experiment.”

Star turned away from the report and stared up at her. “Which is?”

“Breeding James.” His eyebrows shot up, but Dr. Helton lifted her hand to stop him from saying anything. “I know what you’re thinking, but we’re not wasting anything by giving this a try. I will take responsibility for the whole thing and if it turns out to be a dead end we haven’t lost anything. But think of everything we could gain if it works the way we want it to.”

“And exactly who did you find to impregnate?” he asked, narrowing his eyes. “We need to make sure whoever does it is healthy.”

Dr. Helton lifted her chin. “I will do it.”

Star sat up straighter. “You?”

“I started earlier today. The patient was still out of it from his MRI, so it seemed like the perfect opportunity.” She didn’t mention the second time. Didn’t even want to think about it right now. This was science. That was all it would ever be.

Star didn’t react and Dr. Helton found it suddenly difficult to maintain her composure under his intense gaze. He was an unpredictable man, but she’d been certain he would be able to see reason in this matter. Maybe she’d been fooling herself. Maybe she should have waited for the green light from him.

After a second, Star let out a low chuckle and shook his head. “You never stop surprising me, Jane.” He tossed his papers aside and got to his feet. “Very well, we’ll try it your way. I agree that if it doesn’t work out we’ve lost nothing. Do you plan to drug the man every time you copulate?”

“Not if I can help it.” She looked down so Star wouldn’t see the heat rising in her cheeks.

Dr. Helton had no qualms about using her own body for science, but the idea of repeating what she’d just done made something in her stir. What it was, she didn’t know, but it wasn’t an unpleasant feeling. Which was strange and confusing, and nothing she would ever admit to Star.

“Well, the man has been locked up and under constant surveillance for more than a year, so he will no doubt welcome it.” Star shook his head as he turned back to his desk. “Keep me informed on your progress, and be sure you take vitamins. We need to keep you healthy.”

“I will.”

Dr. Helton left the room feeling oddly dirty, but she couldn’t deny that there was also a certain amount of excitement surging through her at the idea of returning to James.

She couldn’t sleep that night. The memory of what had happened earlier in James’s cell was too vivid. She tossed and turned for hours, knowing that she was heading down a dark path that would change things forever, but totally unable to stop it from happening, and by three o’clock in the morning she had completely given up on the idea of sleep.

She arrived in the observation wing to find the hall dark and silent, and no guards on duty outside the cell. James was asleep when she slipped into his room, his breathing deeper and more relaxed than it had been the first time she’d come to him. The cell felt as cold and empty as a tomb, but oddly inviting as well.

Dr. Helton’s heart was pounding when she stopped by his bed, but for a second she didn’t move. She knew she should walk away. Should tell Star that she’d changed her mind and that they needed a different vessel for James’s offspring, but she also knew that she couldn’t make herself do it at this point. Not after what had happened earlier. Only she couldn’t understand why. Couldn’t make her brain—which was used to unraveling elaborate puzzles on a daily basis—untangle this mystery. Angus James was nothing special. He wasn’t an educated man, and although no one would be able to accuse him of being an imbecile, compared to her, his brain was the size of a chicken’s. He wasn’t ugly, but he wasn’t the type of man anyone would look at twice, and thanks to a hard life, he looked at least five years older than he actually was. And yet she wanted him. She couldn’t deny it. Dr. Jane Helton wanted this man.

She undressed quietly, careful not to wake him, then slipped into the bed at his side. The sheets were warm from his body heat and his masculine form felt agreeable next to her smaller one. It had been years since she’d taken the time to have any kind of romantic or sexual relationship with someone. Before the outbreak, before she had started plotting with Star to take over the world, even before starting at the CDC. Her last relationship had ended shortly after her nineteenth birthday, and even though she’d felt the pang of regret at saying goodbye to someone who had been with her for so long, she’d never looked back. Jane Helton had more important things to accomplish in her life. She wanted big things. Great things. A man would only drag her down.

Things had played out exactly as she’d always expected them to and she’d never once regretted not having a warm bed to go home to, had never missed the embrace of a man. After all, there were numerous battery-operated devices that could satisfy the urges her body insisted on clinging to. Who needed a man when pleasure was only the push of a button away?

Now, though, snuggled in next to the test subject, that familiar feeling had returned. The feeling that had been with her in the early days of her relationship, back when she’d been a fresh-faced high school sophomore dating the star quarterback. It felt nicer than she remembered. It was comforting. Welcoming.

James was lying on his back, making it easy for her to slide her hand down his pants. He stirred, but didn’t wake right away, and the noises he made in his sleep roused the doctor’s memories from earlier. This would be the third time in less than twenty-four hours that she’d had sex. It was a hard thing to wrap her mind around after fourteen years of being celibate.

“What the fuck?” James said, his voice groggy with sleep.

“Shhh,” she replied, scooting closer to him. “Don’t talk.”

Her mouth found his in the darkness, and even though he didn’t return the kiss, she wasn’t deterred. She moved her hand faster while scooting closer to him. She ran her tongue across his bottom lip and nipped at it with her teeth. James groaned, but just like earlier, she could tell he was holding back. He didn’t want this. He didn’t want her.

She found his hand with her free one and moved it to her bare breast. “Here.”

He groaned again, but he began to respond. He cupped her breast and pinched her nipple and kissed her back when she once again pressed her lips to his. Less than a minute later he had moved her hand from his erection and pushed her onto her back, climbing on top, shoving her legs apart with his knees. Then he was inside her again, and just like before it was rough and hard. But they kissed the whole time, and he cupped her breasts and groaned out his pleasure right along with her. He was less angry, less punishing. He was giving into the act more. And so was she.

They grunted out their release together, and when he was done he rolled onto his back at her side. Dr. Helton pulled her legs up to her chest once again, waiting for him to storm off like he had earlier, but he didn’t move. His breathing was heavy and ragged and his body was like a board at her side, and the silence that hung in the dark room was so oppressive it made it difficult to breathe, but she was glad he had stayed this time. Glad he hadn’t left her alone in the bed.

“Why?” he asked, finally breaking the silence.

“Why do you think?” She found it difficult to say the words out loud although she wasn’t sure if it was because she felt guilty, or because she was still playing the part of captor.

“Shit.” James shook his head. “You did it before too, didn’t ya? When I was all drugged up.”

“Yes.” She said the word simply, not bothering to cushion the blow or act repentant. She wasn’t, both because she wanted his seed and because she had enjoyed it.

“Thought it was a dream ‘til you came to my room earlier. This is some fucked up shit, you know that, right?”

“I know.” She did know, but she also couldn’t stop it, and now she had reasons that went way beyond science. Way beyond the plans she and Star had made years ago. Beyond the virus and the baby that would hopefully grow inside her.

Silence spread across the room, coating them in its venom. She felt like she could read his mind and she waited with her breath held for him to say what she felt certain was coming.

“I hate you,” he finally said, flinging the words at her like a spear.

“I know,” she replied.

“Why?” he asked again, only this time she knew he was asking much more. He wanted more information about what was happening here, about why they had decided to keep him prisoner and what they were trying to accomplish.

“It’s this or bring your brother in,” she said, even though she knew she should keep her mouth shut.

“Axl?” James shifted so he was facing her. “Why?”

He’d been here for a year and she’d be a fool to think that he hadn’t picked up on things along the way. He had to know by now that they weren’t using his blood to create a vaccine, and he had to know that his immunity was something special.

“He’s immune too.” It was too much information and she knew it, but what could he do with it? He couldn’t leave, and everyone who came into his room already knew that Axl was immune to the virus. James would gain nothing from the information, but it might give her something. It might make him more willing to please her the next time she came to him.

“Shit,” James said again.

They were once again silent.

Dr. Helton lowered her legs and pulled the sheet up to her chin. She should leave, but the stiff cot was oddly inviting, as was the warm body of the prisoner at her side.

“What’s goin’ on out there?” James asked when he realized that she had no intention of leaving.

“Atlanta is starting over.”

“Don’t bullshit me. I ain’t as dumb as I sound and I know you and whoever you work for got no intention of lettin’ things go back to the way they was. You did this, didn’t you?”

“How do you mean?” she asked even though she knew what he was asking.

What she didn’t know was how he had figured it out. How did he know that she and the team of doctors she was working with had started this? Had someone said something in front of him that they shouldn’t have? She certainly hadn’t. Until now, she had barely spoken to Angus James.

“The virus. The zombies. You’re responsible for it all, ain’t you?”

“Not me directly, no, but I’m part of the team that released the virus.” She licked her lips, wondering how much she should say or if it would even matter. She couldn’t see how. “We planned it, but there was a glitch we weren’t expecting that prevented us from accomplishing our goals. That’s where you come in. We needed to study someone immune so we could move forward.”

“And now you’re hopin’ to make a baby that’s immune too. Shit.” He pushed himself up and stared down at her, but in the darkness of the room he was little more than a shadowy outline, making it impossible for her to read his expression. “It’ll be yours too, you know that. Your baby. You gonna let them poke it with needles and inject it with the virus? You gonna stand by and watch them torture it the way they been torturing me?”

Heat flared through her that was a mixture of shame and anger. She shoved the sheet away and got to her feet. “I’ve never been very maternal.”

Dr. Helton stood with her back to James as she pulled her clothes on, her face hot and her body shaking. She breathed slowly in and out of her nose, but it didn’t calm her and she was still angry when she was finally dressed. She didn’t look back at James as she headed for the door, too shaken by her sudden feelings to acknowledge him. Good. Hopefully she had gotten the asshole out of her system.

She made sure he was drugged when she visited him the next day, and the day after that. She kept their encounters brief and clinical, keeping as much of their clothes on as she could. Between her visits she did her best to avoid his cell altogether, but she couldn’t deny the fact that she wanted to see him. To talk to him even. It made no sense considering her position, but the desire was there and she couldn’t make it go away.

Day four of her breeding experiment found her busy in the labs, and even though she felt the urge to go to him, she continued with her work instead. They had copulated five times now, and despite the fact that she knew her chances of conceiving would go up if she continued to visit him every day, she also knew she needed distance from this man. And she needed the drugs. She needed him to be out of it when she finally did visit him.

Over the next several weeks she visited Angus James nearly every day. Each time she made sure he was in twilight sleep before she went, and each time she made sure it was over quickly.

The last time she went to see him her monthly cycle was two days late. Although she knew with almost certainty that she was pregnant, she hadn’t yet gotten a blood test. Once she did she would no longer have an excuse to visit Angus James in his cell, and although she knew it was the best thing for her, she wasn’t ready to walk away yet. She wanted one more night with him before she said goodbye. One more night when he was totally with it.

She went in the middle of the night again, slipping into his room shortly after three o’clock and stripping down just as she had before. This time when she slid into bed at his side, she woke him with a kiss. He responded, just as she had hoped he would, still half asleep but leaning into her like he’d been waiting for her arrival.

She undressed him as they kissed, removing all of his clothes for the first time and allowing their bodies to fully appreciate each other. James appeared to understand that this was the last time, and like her, he seemed to want to savor it.

They took their time, exploring one another the way they hadn’t been able to before, and when he finally pushed inside her, the act was slow and deliberate. They never said a word, not from the second she slid into his bed to the moment of his climax, but there was something sweet about the silence.

When they were done James rolled onto his back and she found her head resting on his chest. His heart beat against her head, reminding her that he was a living, breathing person. It wasn’t something she liked to think about, but it was true. He was a prisoner here. He was her prisoner.

“What can I do to make your time here easier?” she said after a few minutes of silence.

“Books would be nice. Maybe some cards or some other kinda game I can play by myself.”

“Crossword puzzles?” she asked, thinking that there had to be hundreds of old crossword puzzle books just lying around.

“I’d try anything once.”

She nodded. “What else?”

“I wanna know what’s going on with ‘em. I wanna know if they’re okay and if they’re happy.”

“That sounds reasonable,” she said even though she knew Star wouldn’t like it. Of course, Star wouldn’t like what she had just done either, and telling Angus what was going on with his family was nothing in comparison. “Lila and Al have a baby boy, they named him Luke, and Joshua is working here at the CDC as a doctor. Axl and Vivian are raising Megan as their own. She’s a little over a year old now and absolutely beautiful. Green eyes and dark hair.” The image of the little baby flashed through her mind and Dr. Helton’s heart constricted painfully. She ignored it and went on. “They’re just trying to get on with life.”

“That it?”

“Pretty much.” She hesitated, thinking about The Church and its growing popularity, and after only a second of hesitation decided to tell James about it. “A new religion has sprung up since this all started, they call it The Church. It started small but it’s gaining momentum. It’s centered around the savior of the apocalypse, a man who was immune to the zombie virus and died saving the world. They say he gave his life coming to the CDC, but one day he will come back and save everyone again by wiping the walking dead off the face of the earth. They worship you, Angus James.”

His chest shook under her head as a chuckle rolled through his body. It grew in strength until Dr. Helton had to sit up, but still James didn’t stop. He laughed so hard that tears, barely visible in the dark room, slid down his cheeks, but even then he couldn’t get the laughter under control. It was a deep chuckle that came from deep within him and shook the entire bed.

“Well, ain’t they gonna be shit out of luck. I sure as hell ain’t comin’ back to save nobody, and even if I did, there’s nothing I could do to get rid of the fuckin’ zombies.” He laughed harder.

Dr. Helton found herself smiling, and then laughing too. Thinking about the absurdity of the people in this settlement who wasted their time praying to this man. Angus not only wasn’t dead, but he would definitely not be coming back to save them.

“There’s a statue of you and I hear they’re building a second shrine on the other side of town.”

“A statue?” Angus wiped the back of his hand across his face. “Of me?”

“Yes.”

He shook his head. “Don’t that beat all.”

His laughter died down, but Dr. Helton didn’t rejoin him on the bed. Instead, she stood, knowing she needed to leave.

“I’ll be sure to get you some books and things, and I’ll let you know if anything significant happens in your family’s lives.” She pulled her underwear on, then her pants, but she was still topless when she turned to face him. “I have to get going.”

“You pregnant?” he asked, still sprawled out and naked on the bed.

“I have to take a test, but I think so.” She pulled her shirt over her head, thankful for the excuse to look away from him.

“So I’m gonna be a father after all this time. Didn’t think it would ever happen.” He snorted. “You gonna tell me when you find out?”

“If that’s what you want.”

“It ain’t what I want, but it’s the way it is.”

She understood. “I’ll keep you informed as much as I can.”

“You gonna raise it?”

“No, of course not. It will be property of the CDC. We have a nurse on our team, she’s been around since the beginning and I trust her implicitly. I’m sure you’ve met her. Helen.”

James nodded.

“I plan to make her the baby’s guardian.”

James said nothing.

“I have to go.”

She turned her back to him but had only taken one step when he said, “This mean you ain’t comin’ back?”

She knew he meant like this, slipping into his bed in the middle of the night, and it warmed her to know that he actually cared. It probably had more to do with sex than with her, but that didn’t matter. He wanted her, which was something that neither one of them could have predicted.

“No.” She said the word with as much authority as she could muster, but it was weak and unconvincing. “That wouldn’t be appropriate.”

He didn’t respond, and a second later she was out the door and headed through the dark hall. It was nearly five o’clock now and she knew that in two hours time the labs would be bustling with activity. It was time to get her blood drawn so she could confirm what she already knew.

He had only a vague sense of time, but it was aided by Dr. Helton’s growing waistline. She kept her word after their last meeting, sending him books and crossword puzzles and even a deck of cards, but she also kept her word about not coming back to see him. There were nights when he would lie awake, long after the lights had been turned off and the guards had gone to wherever they called home, hoping that she would come back, but it never happened.

The question of why he wanted to see her was something Angus didn’t want to focus on too much. It had to be sex, plain and simple, and the fact that it gave him something different to do in the otherwise monotonous existence he now had. He should hate the blonde doctor, and a part of him did, but there was another part that just wanted someone, anyone, to talk to. Even the bitch who had used and tortured and entrapped him.

As the weeks passed and the doctor’s stomach grew in size, his anger began to overshadow even his need for company. She was carrying his child, a child that had been created to serve these assholes. One who would spend its life in captivity like it was no better than a rat in a lab. It was almost too much to take.

Angus had never thought he wanted to be a father, and even now the paternal feelings radiating through him had less to do with his desire to bring children into this world than the knowledge that he was going to whether he wanted to or not. He liked kids, girls especially who he imagined had a chance of not growing up to be assholes or pricks the way most of the men he knew were, and he hated the idea of any child of his—girl or boy—being tortured.

But it would happen and there was nothing he could do about it. Dr. Helton had spoken of the baby like it wasn’t even a living thing, let alone her own child. She was a cold woman, emotionless and heartless as she went about her daily duties, disregarding human life in her pursuit of science.

Except Angus knew she wasn’t as emotionless as she wanted to seem. He’d seen a different side of her, here in his bed. Had sensed that there was more to this woman than she was letting on. She’d come to him to create a new subject for her experiments, but she had come back for other reasons.

Their last night together had made him forget that he was a prisoner and she was responsible. When they were together, they had been two different people living in a different world, and it had been good. For both of them.

But she hadn’t returned, as much as Angus knew she wanted to. He could see it in her eyes as she watched him through the glass, knew that she wanted him as much as he wanted her. Knew that it was difficult, almost impossible, for her to stay away, and yet she did. Night after night, week after week, month after month.

She was six months pregnant by the time she gave in. By then he’d given up waiting, and that night when she slid into his bed, he was so surprised that he almost pushed her onto the floor. Her hand was on him before he’d even had a chance to open his eyes though, and when her lips touched his, all his loneliness and anger disappeared in the blink of an eye, replaced by the need to feel another person. To feel like he was a person.

They didn’t speak. They didn’t need to. The sex was slow and needy, and he felt greedy and sick in his desire to touch every inch of her, but he couldn’t stop. Going day after day with no physical contact was driving him mad, and who knew how long it would be before she gave in again. Who knew how long he would have to wait to once again feel the warmth of another person.

It wasn’t until they had finished that he remembered the baby. She snuggled close to him and her round stomach touched his hip. The feel of it turned his body to ice and made the last thirty minutes they’d spent together seem evil and twisted.

He pushed her away, not caring that she fell, and then jumped to his feet. “Get out!” The words were so violent that it felt like they’d ripped their way out of him.

She looked up from where she was sprawled out on the ground, naked and blinking in confusion. “What? Angus, what are you—”

She’d never called him by his first name before and hearing it now felt like a lie, and he hated her for it. Hated her for making him feel like someone else when he knew exactly who he was. He was Angus James. He didn’t take shit from anyone, least of all a woman who didn’t give a damn about him.

“Whore,” he spit at her. “You lyin’ whore!” His voice echoed through the room. “I don’t want you comin’ back here, you understand? You used me and you’re gonna use her—” He pointed at Dr. Helton’s round belly, barely registering that he had called the baby a her. “That’s my baby. Mine. You can’t do what you’re gonna do then crawl into my bed at night the way you just did.” He took a step toward the doctor, who stared up at him with terrified eyes, and leaned down so their faces were only inches apart. “You come back and I’ll kill you, consequences be damned. Understand?”

She nodded as she scrambled to her feet, grabbing her clothes in the process. She didn’t even bother putting them on before running from the room.

Then she was gone and Angus found himself alone once again. Only this time it was so much worse because he knew it was permanent. She would not come back to him, and neither would anyone else. Not anymore.

His stomach lurched so violently that he barely made it to the bathroom before throwing up.

The next three months went by faster than Angus would have thought possible. Dr. Helton never came back into his room, but he saw her through the glass nearly every day. Her round stomach was a constant reminder of the hell he was living in. The bigger she got, the harder he found it to sleep at night. Soon his baby would be born. Soon he would be a father.

When her time finally came, her absence was physically painful for him. He went through his normal barrage of tests in a daze, barely noticing it when they took his temperature and blood pressure, barely feeling it when they drew blood. The day passed and he was brought lunch, but he couldn’t eat, and then it was time for dinner. He touched nothing even though his stomach growled. Instead he sat on the couch and waited for the moment that would inevitably come.

A part of him hoped the baby died.

She was more disheveled than he’d ever seen her when she finally showed up. Her blonde hair was a frizzy mess, barely contained in its ponytail and hanging down around her face. The lights in the hall, which would have normally been turned off by now, were still on and bright, highlighting the puffy skin under her eyes. She stopped at the window and watched him for a few minutes like she was unsure of what to do, but finally, having decided it was safe, she opened the door.

Dr. Helton stayed in the doorway. “It’s a girl.”

He nodded as a mixture of sickness and pride twisted his insides. “Healthy?”

“Very.”

“Name?”

“They will call her Test Subject 06.”

He turned his gaze to the floor. “Pretty.”

“I promised I’d tell you.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

He expected to hear the door shut, but there was no sound, so he lifted his gaze. She was still standing in the doorway watching him, and to his surprise, there were tears shimmering in her eyes.

“She won’t be hurt.”

“There are lots of ways to hurt a person,” he replied.

“I guess that’s true.” She crossed her arms. “Have you changed your mind?”

“No.” There was so little venom in the word that it didn’t sound convincing, but he knew she wouldn’t come back unless he told her it was okay. He had to bite down on his bottom lip to stop from saying it. The idea of company, of feeling the warmth of another human being, was almost too intoxicating to resist.

“Okay, then.” She took a step back. “Get some sleep.”

She turned to leave but before she could shut the door, Angus was on his feet. “Do I get to see her?”

The doctor’s back was to him and she turned slowly. “I might be able to make that happen, but are you sure you want to?”

“No.” He shook his head. “But I gotta.”

She nodded as if she understood, but Angus couldn’t see how.

“I’m not sure when it will be,” she said, “but I’ll make it happen.”

The doctor left him then, the door clicking behind her and the lights going out a second later and plunging him into darkness. Angus sank onto the couch, knowing he would never be able to sleep. He was a father. It didn’t seem real. Then again, none of this did.

It took the doctor a while to make good on her promise, how long Angus didn’t know for sure, but long enough that he started to wonder if she had forgotten. He didn’t see her at all between the time she came to tell him that the baby had been born and the night she arrived in his cell holding the child.

She came in the middle of the night yet again. The hall was dark and Angus was asleep, but was jerked back to consciousness when the lights suddenly turned on, flooding his world with brightness. His eyes still hadn’t adjusted when the door clicked open and he didn’t move from his position on the bed, knowing what was about to happen and still uncertain as to whether or not he wanted it to. He had a daughter in this very building and meeting her seemed like a necessity almost as vital as his need for air, but he had no doubt that the encounter would be bittersweet.

The baby, like him, was a prisoner. Even worse, she would never taste freedom. Would never know that there was a world outside this building or that people could be good. She’d never understand what love was, something Angus had only had a vague idea of himself until this damn virus hit, but something that he was now achingly aware of.

The doctor walked through the door with a bundle wrapped in a pink blanket. The color shocked Angus more than anything because he couldn’t imagine anyone in this God forsaken building having the forethought to get a blanket that gave the baby any kind of identity. She was, after all, being called Test Subject 06. But clearly, someone out there cared. Someone associated with these people had a heart. Someone, hopefully the person who was charged with taking care of his child, was concerned with her wellbeing.

The doctor stopped halfway to the bed and Angus found himself on his feet. He crossed the room to her, his eyes on the child as he moved. Her face, smooth and flawless and totally serene, peeked out of the blanket. She was so fresh. So beautiful and undamaged by this world that the knowledge of what she would soon endure made him sick.

“This her?” he asked even though he knew it was. For some reason though, he wanted confirmation that the perfect little thing in the doctor’s arms was his blood.

“Yes.”

She held the child out and Angus took her, awed by how small and warm she was. His arms seemed to swallow her whole. She was tiny. Were all newborn babies this tiny? He’d never held one before, but he felt like he could crush her with one hand if he wanted to. He felt like a beast or a monster. He felt like he had destroyed this child’s life by allowing her to exist in the first place.

“She’s small,” he said, his eyes on the face of the sleeping child.

“She was seven pounds when she was born.”

He nodded, and then found himself crossing the room to the couch. The doctor didn’t follow him and he was glad. He wanted to be alone. He wanted to hold his daughter and weep for everything they had both lost. He wanted to have time to sort through the feelings inside him.

His emotions were at war with one another. Part of him wanted to kill this baby right here and now, that way he could save her from what was to come, but another part wanted her to grow. That part of him wanted to see what she could become. Wanted to hope that she could have a life one day that was bigger than these walls.

“She still don’t got a name?” he asked as he shifted the baby in his arms. She let out a little sound that made his heart constrict, but didn’t wake.

“No.”

He looked up and focused on Dr. Helton for the first time, looking her over. She was back to looking like the woman he’d first met here in his cell. The cold, clinical doctor who showed no emotion. Her hair was slicked back as usual, and she’d lost what little bit of weight she’d gained during her pregnancy. But he had an odd sense that she was putting on an act. The way she held herself, keeping a distance from him and the baby, made it seem like she was trying to hold up an invisible wall that was threatening to crumble down around her.

“Who’s takin’ care of her?”

“Helen.”

Angus had met the woman once. Thin, late thirties, with skin so worn and wrinkled that at first glance she looked at least ten years older. Her voice was gravelly, the calling card of a chain smoker, but her blue eyes had been oddly kind. She’d come in to draw blood not too long after he’d first woken from his coma, but had seemed oddly unsettled by the whole thing. She’d taken his blood, her eyes darting back and forth between him and the guards at his back over and over again, and when she had the vials she’d come for, she had run from the room. He only saw her through the window after that, and then she stopped coming to the observation hall completely.

“Helen takin’ good care of her?”

“She is.” Dr. Helton crossed her arms as if the conversation made her uncomfortable.

“Good,” he said, then went back to staring at the baby.

There were other questions he wanted to ask, questions about what they had in store for his daughter and if they had started their sick experiments already, but he couldn’t bring himself to say the words. Instead, he focused on his baby and let the silence surround them.

They stayed that way for nearly an hour. The doctor standing in the middle of the room, not daring to leave him but also not willing to come any closer, while Angus held his daughter. The baby never woke, but she made soft sounds in her sleep that drew tears to his eyes.

He fell in love during that hour, fell harder than he had ever thought possible. The little thing in his arms couldn’t weigh more than fifteen pounds, but she had somehow stolen his heart. He’d loved other people. Darla had managed to work her way inside him and he would have given his life for Axl gladly. Even Vivian, who he’d hated when she’d first dropped into their lives, became someone important to him. Hadley, Rambo, Winston, the doc, Al. Those people had become oddly important after the virus hit, and they had all been family to him. But the baby was something different. The ache inside him was new and painfully sweet. It gnawed at him. Made him sick at the thought of any harm coming to her.

Before long the doctor said it was time to go. Dr. Helton avoided his gaze when he handed the child back to her, but it didn’t matter. He only had eyes for the baby.

“Can you bring her again?” he asked, hating that he needed to see her, but knowing that he did.

The doctor met his gaze, which seemed to take her a lot of effort. “Why?”

“She’s my daughter.”

The doctor opened her mouth to say something, but stopped. She swallowed before she started again. “It will be a while.”

He nodded. “Whenever. I just gotta see her.”

Dr. Helton nodded as she turned away, her eyes down and focused on the baby in her arms. He watched her walk out of the room, staring at the door long after it had closed. Wondering what she was thinking and what had gone so wrong in her life that she’d turned into this twisted version of a human being. It had to have been something major. Angus understood what it was like to have a shitty childhood, and even though he had done his fair share of horrible things, he never would have stooped to something like this.

After they had gone, leaving Angus once again alone, he found it impossible to sleep. Instead, he lay awake all night, staring up into the darkness as he tried to figure out what he could do to save his baby from this life. He knew it was a waste of time, he was no more in control of what was happening than she was, but he couldn’t make himself stop thinking about it. Couldn’t force his brain to shut off. There had to be a way. He’d give anything—his life, his soul, the souls of every person in this building—to save his daughter from what was going to happen to her.

He fell asleep shortly before dawn with the knowledge that he was powerless to do a thing.

After the baby was born, Dr. Helton threw herself into her work with a vigor even she had never experienced before, but she steered clear of Angus’s cell. Even when she learned that Al and Lila were expecting a second child she didn’t go to him. It made her feel guilty, as much as she hated to admit it to herself, but she knew that she had to keep her distance as much as possible or it would be the end of everything.

The child, Test Subject 06, had done something to her, but she knew that it wasn’t really about the girl. It was about Angus, about the time they’d spent together creating the child, about how he’d reacted when he’d found out and how he had looked at her when he’d held their baby in his arms. Dr. Helton had grown up with loving parents, something that people who knew her now would probably scoff at, but it was still a bond she had never understood. Even as a girl she’d felt a distance from her parents that she couldn’t explain, and she was completely certain that she had never actually loved another human being. Felt attachment, yes, but not love. Not the all-consuming, burning need other people felt.

She knew what that feeling looked like thanks to the weekly transcripts of Angus’s family. They were people who loved. Vivian and Axl, Lila and Al. They had something she’d only read about in books and had doubted was actually real until now, but reading about the private conversations these people had late at night when they thought no one was listening made her wonder. There was affection in everything, joy and happiness even in simple conversations. Laughter. And the sex. Jane would never admit to anyone how many times she scanned the words these couples whispered to one another in their intimate moments. Even to her it felt voyeuristic, but it had nothing to do with trying to grab a cheap thrill or two. It was about trying to understand what it meant and felt like to give yourself to another person so completely, to trust them with every thought in your head, to lay yourself bare in front of them, completely believing that they would take whatever you had to offer and look at it as a gift rather than a burden.

Now, staring at the most recent transcripts, she knew that if she wanted to keep her promise to Angus she would have to go to him. There was news, big news that she knew he’d want to hear, but news that might not be happy considering he knew what was happening inside this building.

VIVIAN:
AXL, WAKE
UP.

AXL: (SOUNDING
GROGGY.) LILA
HAVE
THE
BABY?

VIVIAN:
A
GIRL.

AXL:
GOOD. (A
YAWN.) COME
HERE. I’M
TOO
BEAT
TO
GET
UP.

VIVIAN:
THANKS
FOR
WATCHING
ALL
THE
KIDS. IT
WAS
A
BIG
HELP.

AXL:
TWO
KIDS
IS
A
LOT, YOU
KNOW
THAT?

(A
PAUSE.)

VIVIAN:
TOO
MUCH?

AXL: (SOUNDING
SLEEPY.) WHAT?

VIVIAN:
ARE
YOU
SAYING
THAT
TWO
KIDS
IS
TOO
MUCH?

AXL:
NO. JUST
A
LOT.

VIVIAN:
GOOD. I
WOULDN’T
WANT
YOU
TO
CHANGE
YOUR
MIND
ABOUT
HAVING
A
BABY.

(ANOTHER
PAUSE.)

AXL:
WHY’S
THAT?

VIVIAN:
BECAUSE
I’M
PREGNANT.

(MOVEMENT.)

AXL:
YOU
SURE?

VIVIAN:
VERY
SURE.

(KISSING.)

AXL:
I
LOVE
YOU. (MUFFLED.)

(MORE
KISSING.)

Vivian was finally pregnant. Dr. Helton had known that they were trying, but it had been so long that she was starting to wonder—just as they were—if there might be a problem. But it had happened and now she knew that she not only needed to tell Star, but Angus as well.

She’d promised him she would, but the thought of going to him after all these months made her uneasy. Getting him out of her system was tough. Impossible, really, because she still considered going to him every night when she laid down to go to sleep. Thought about how it had felt the last time she’d been there, before he’d remembered what a monster she was and had lashed out at her. How gentle his touch had been, how thoroughly he had caressed and kissed her body. How she had wanted it to last forever.

As much as she dreaded the thought of going to him and having to once again walk away, she knew that she couldn’t go back on her promise. It wasn’t right, and she had already wronged this man in more ways than she could count. She owed him that much at least.

So Dr. Helton went to see him, only she didn’t sneak into his room late at night as she had before, but went in the middle of the day when the observation wing was buzzing with activity. There were so many witnesses around that she knew she wouldn’t be able to give into the temptation his presence brought her.

He was on the bed reading, stretched out and lying on his back, making her remember how she had climbed on top of him, naked and needy. How he’d looked up at her with eyes that were a mixture of anger and desire. Just as he was now.

She made sure the door was securely shut behind her before she said, “I have some news.”

Angus didn’t lower the book and he didn’t say a word, he just stared.

“About your family.” She thought that maybe he hadn’t remembered the request he’d made and had no clue why she was there, but he just nodded like he wanted her to go on. “Lila and Al had another baby, a girl, and Vivian is pregnant.”

He lowered the book. “Shit.”

She knew what he was thinking because she had thought the same thing when she’d read the transcript: this child would have James blood. It could be immune.

“Yes,” was all she said.

Angus let out a deep sigh. “That it?”

“Yes.”

“What about my girl? How’s she doin’?”

“She’s healthy. That’s all I can tell you because I haven’t seen her.” She didn’t mention that she was avoiding the child, but he had to know. “If there’s an issue I’ll be told.”

Angus snorted. “You’re like a fuckin’ robot.”

“Perhaps,” she said.

He lifted his book and his eyes returned to the page, but she could tell he wasn’t reading it. He just wanted her to leave and this was his way of telling her to go to hell. She was starting to wonder if she wasn’t, in fact, in hell. Or at the very least, purgatory.

“I’ll tell you if anything else happens.”

He nodded once and she turned away, hating the pain in her gut that was desperately trying to claw it’s way to her heart. She hadn’t used that organ for anything but pumping blood through her body for so long that she’d forgotten what it felt like to really feel. It was horrible.

Joshua couldn’t believe it had been nearly two years since they’d arrived in New Atlanta. Two years. For him, leaving Colorado had been both heartbreaking and liberating at the same time. It was there that he’d fallen in love for the first time, only it had been with a woman who was totally incapable of loving him back, and he’d felt like he was leaving a part of him behind when they’d left.

Before the virus struck, Joshua had never really had time for love or relationships. No, that wasn’t exactly true. It was more like he’d never had the confidence for them. He had always been the gangly kid, towering over his classmates from an early age, and had lacked the confidence to really put himself out there. Yes, he’d dated in high school, but it had been a girl he’d known since the age of five and she had made the first move. They had only been twelve when they’d gotten together, just kids, but they’d dated all the way through high school. He’d trusted her with every fiber of his being right up until the moment he discovered that she’d been cheating on him. A lot.

It had devastated him, but he’d told himself it was a good thing. He was smart and driven and had plans to be a doctor, so putting love and relationships behind had felt like a sensible thing to do. But that betrayal had torn away at his ability to give himself completely to another person. Had made him feel like he didn’t deserve happiness the way other people did. Had made him feel like he’d always be alone.

In college he’d focused on his studies, and then his career, putting everything he had into becoming the best doctor he could be. He’d felt at home in his job, not awkward and out-of-place the way he’d felt most of his life up until then. When something went wrong he knew how to respond and what to do to make it better. He was cool in a crisis, barely blinking when someone came in, bleeding and nearly broken. He’d found his place in the world.

Then the virus came and that feeling of helplessness returned, only this time stronger than ever. Even years later he could remember how it had felt to have patient after patient die right in front of him. How he hadn’t been able to do a thing to save them or even to relieve their pain. He’d felt powerless. Useless. Like he’d wasted his life by studying medicine in the first place. He’d hated himself.

The feeling had only grown after meeting Vivian, Axl, and Angus, because things had only gotten worse. They’d looked to him as some kind of hero, a doctor in the midst of the worst medical crisis the world had ever seen, but weeks on the road had led to death and sickness, and even when he’d managed to save someone it had felt more like the luck of the draw than anything he’d really done.

He’d been lost back then, but so had Anne. After little Jake had died—the child she’d adopted as her own after the virus had killed his parents—she’d turned to Joshua for comfort. He’d needed it, so he’d allowed it to happen, fooling himself into thinking that her kisses were more than just her way of trying to forget the pain. Making himself believe that the love he felt was reciprocal.

It hadn’t been, and he now knew that even if he had stayed in Colorado, he and Anne wouldn’t have ended up together. That didn’t mean thinking about how it had played out didn’t hurt. It did, but ultimately it had been worth the pain because it brought him to where he was now.

Parvarti.

He remembered the day they’d picked her up on the side of the road, back before they’d learned that zombies weren’t just a thing of nightmares but a part of their new reality. She’d been quiet and timid back then, and had seemed younger than her nineteen years. Traveling with Trey, she had clung to the big guy for support. His death had changed her, made her seem hard and closed-off, but after two years of living together, Joshua knew there was much more to her than she let on.

They’d started living together out of necessity, but it had never been awkward or uncomfortable the way people might have thought. She was easy to talk to, quick to listen, and understanding, and it hadn’t taken long for him to realize that he actually looked forward to seeing her at the end of the night, to sitting in the living room with her and just talking about his day. To just being near her.

It had taken him longer, however, to realize that he was in love with her.

She felt it too, of that Joshua was certain, but for some reason he’d been hesitant to broach the subject. Maybe because he was unsure of how it would change things, or maybe because there was a part of him that was still that insecure kid who felt certain love wasn’t in the cards for him. Or maybe it was because he was afraid that it would be Anne all over again.

He had begged Anne to leave Colorado with him even though by that point he’d known that she didn’t love him the way he loved her. She had started to pull away, started to complain that he was too clingy. He had tried his best to give her space, but nothing he did had made her happy. Still, when he’d decided to head to Atlanta with Axl and Vivian, he’d held onto the hope that Anne would go with him. That if they just left Colorado they could start over and forget the heartbreak and pain of all those weeks on the road.

She had refused, though, and the heartbreak had followed him to Atlanta.

But after two years of being unhappy, Joshua was tired of play-acting. Tired of going home every night to a woman he loved and pretending he didn’t. Tired of playing it safe and being afraid that she would turn him down just like Anne had, especially when he knew with almost certainty that she wouldn’t. He could see it in her eyes. Could tell when she looked at him that she saw something other than an awkward man who towered over everyone. Knew that she was thinking the same thing, wanting love but fearing it would rip her in two once again.

That night when she got home, Joshua was standing in the middle of the living room while his heart pounded erratically and fanged butterflies gnawed on his stomach. She walked in and took off her weapon belt, just like she did every day, then pulled the bandana off her head. Her hair, long and dark and silky, fell around her shoulders just as she turned to face him, and the smile she threw his way lit up her brown eyes. That was how he knew. That look, that smile, was reserved only for him.

“What are—” she began, but he cut her off by saying the words he’d been holding in for weeks, “I love you.”

Parv’s eyes grew wide and her lips formed an O that should have terrified him, but instead made his heart swell and ache in an uncomfortably pleasant way. He waited, holding his breath as the silence dragged on and on until he thought he would go mad, but not once did he doubt that she felt the same way. Not once did he think that she was going to reject him.

“I know,” she said, mimicking the words Princess Leia had said to Han Solo, probably without even realizing it.

Then she smiled and crossed the room to him and all the heartbreak and pain of the past three years melted away. She was so short compared to him that she had to stand on the very tips of her toes, and even then he had to lean down when he took her face in his hands. They just stared at each other for a moment, locked in the other’s gaze as if each of them wanted to capture this moment so they could hold onto the feeling for the rest of their lives, and when their lips finally touched, Joshua knew he was home.

They made love. The saying had always felt cheesy and awkward to him before, but when he kissed and touched the woman who had stolen his heart, the term was the only thing that could do the moment justice. Every inch of her was perfection, from her skin, so dark and flawless compared to his, to the softness of her lips. Her gasps flooded his senses and the feel of her nails digging into his back was perfectly painful. To him Parvarti was like a dream come true after all the horror he had witnessed, and having her there, in his arms, was a reality he was more than happy to wake up to every day for the rest of his life.

The next day they walked hand in hand down the street of new Atlanta to a little shop that sold jewelry liberated from the dead. There they bought matching rings, silver bands that were thin and etched with vines. Joshua would have bought her the biggest diamond in the world, but he’d known even before he asked that she wouldn’t want it, and he understood. Before the virus, showy things like diamonds had been important, but not anymore. Now time was the biggest commodity around, because it was so short, so special and fleeting and unpredictable.

“You have a ring,” Dr. Helton said the next day, pausing halfway to the microscope when she noticed the ring on Joshua’s finger.

“I got married,” he said simply.

It had only been two days since he’d confessed his feelings to Parv, and the newness of it hadn’t worn off. He couldn’t get enough of her, couldn’t believe his luck that he had finally found someone who could fill all the cracks in his life so perfectly.

The doctor stared at the ring, still hunched over like she was frozen in place. Joshua squirmed uncomfortably, unsure of what she was thinking or what to say. She’d been different over the last few months, still quiet but less hard, but he’d attributed that to the baby she’d lost. It had seemed unreal that one of the doctors who had been responsible for creating the miracle antibiotic in the first place hadn’t been able to save her own child, but it had happened. One day she’d been pregnant, waddling through the labs the way only an expectant mother could, and then she wasn’t.

When she hadn’t come to the lab that day, Joshua had assumed she was in labor, and the idea of this cold woman being a mother had bugged him more than it should have. It just hadn’t seemed right. Had felt unnatural. The following day when he’d learned that the child had died shortly after birth, he’d felt horrible for even having those thoughts. No one, not even a stoic woman like Dr. Helton, deserved to lose their baby.

Since then she’d been more reserved, but also softer at the same time. It was a hard thing to explain and probably something very few people noticed, but something Joshua was very aware of. Like now, how she was able to maintain her cold exterior while looking so intently at his ring. How her eyes studied it as if envious of its existence while she remained emotionless and detached. Joshua assumed it went deeper than the baby, though. Perhaps she was in love with the father, whoever that was, but couldn’t be with him for some reason. Maybe he was married. Maybe it was Star. Although the idea that anyone could love that man was unnerving.

Dr. Helton exhaled and tore her gaze away from Joshua’s ring, returning her focus to the microscope. “Congratulations,” she said in a cool tone.

“Thank you,” he replied.

For the past two years Joshua had worked in the CDC and he’d never seen a single thing to indicate that Angus—or anyone else for that matter—was being held against their will, but he was glad he’d made the switch. The work was challenging, and studying the virus and how it had mutated was interesting. It was complex, clearly manmade, yet so simple in its ability to kill. He knew he wasn’t aware of all the inner workings of the CDC, but he wasn’t sure if it mattered. Places like this always had secrets, but that didn’t mean they were necessarily bad. It didn’t mean that Star, although creepy, was evil or out to destroy the world.

“How well did you know Angus James?” Dr. Helton asked out of nowhere, startling Joshua from his thoughts.

He watched her for a few seconds, trying to figure out where the question had come from, but she was still peering into the microscope as if she hadn’t said a thing.

“About as well as anyone could know him, I guess,” Joshua finally said.

She looked up then and the surprise written on her face shocked him. For two years they’d worked side by side and he’d gotten so used to the total lack of emotion she showed at every turn that he had begun to think of her as incapable of feeling. Even after her baby died she seemed like a rock, albeit a slightly softer stone than she’d been before.

“Why is that?” she said after a moment.

“I’m not really sure Angus knew himself, not really, which made it pretty impossible to get to know him. He was a hothead, but he had his moments. When the virus first hit we went to California to get Vivian’s daughter, Emily, who had only been four. Angus liked her. That was the first time I saw a softer side of him, but not the last.”

Something that might have resembled pain crossed the doctor’s face and Joshua found himself wondering if she hadn’t been more affected by the death of her baby than she’d let on. “So he liked children.”

It wasn’t a question, but he answered anyway. “He did.”

“What else? What else brought that side out in him?”

The questions had begun to get uncomfortable, but mainly because it brought to mind the reason Joshua had started working in the CDC to begin with: to get more information about what had happened to Angus and if he could still be alive. He’d dismissed the idea more than a year ago, thinking that it would be impossible for them to keep something so big a secret. Someone surely would have slipped up by now and spilled the beans if Angus was being held against his will. Or at least that’s what he’d thought. Now though, with Dr. Helton asking so many questions about what Angus had been like, Joshua found himself wondering if he shouldn’t start digging around just a little bit more. Not physically, because if they were hiding Angus that could get him killed, but maybe probing the doctor while she was in such a talkative mood would get him somewhere. Anything was possible.

“That side of Angus came out at strange times, but it was there. The only person he consistently cared about was Axl, but even that came across as violent at times. I just don’t think he knew how to love another person.”

She nodded a few times, almost as if she were thinking it through, and then she said, “So he loved his brother more than anyone else.”

“More than he loved himself.”

She looked away before saying, “How is his brother doing?”

Joshua kept his gaze on the doctor, taking in every inch of her to be sure he didn’t miss a thing. “Good. He and Vivian are expecting their first child.”

He saw it when she flinched, but the expression on her face told him it wasn’t a surprise, which didn’t make any sense. No one outside the family had been told about Vivian’s pregnancy yet. Working as a midwife, she had seen more than her fair share of the heartache associated with pregnancy and childbirth, and it didn’t always come after the baby was born. Sometimes women miscarried, more frequently these days than ever before, and she’d wanted to keep the pregnancy quiet until she was further along. But somehow, against all odds, Dr. Helton had known.

Even more confusing was the fact that it seemed to hurt her to think about the child being born. The expression on her face was so raw that it couldn’t be anything but pain she was feeling. Was it pain for the baby and if so, why? Why would she think that the birth of an innocent baby would be painful unless there was something else going on? Something that had to do with the CDC. Something that meant Dr. Helton knew about a pregnancy before it had even been announced to the general population.

What could it be? Joshua wracked his brain as he and Dr. Helton went back to studying slides. She was quiet, even more so than usual, and he could tell that she was thinking. About what he had told her concerning Angus or about the baby, he didn’t know, but he had the sense that the two were somehow connected.

Then it hit him. They were connected by blood. The baby Vivian was carrying was biologically related to Angus James, who had been immune and had come here to be studied by the CDC. But that didn’t mean anything, did it? Axl was also related to Angus, but he wasn’t immune. They’d all been tested when they first arrived and he hadn’t been. But what if he was? What if the CDC had lied and let him go about his life unaware of the fact that he carried the same immunities that his brother did? What if they were keeping tabs on him to make sure he didn’t go anywhere or endanger his life? It seemed crazy, but it would explain how Dr. Helton knew that Vivian was pregnant.

There was only one way to know for sure. He needed to test Axl’s blood.

Axl had just stepped out of his apartment when he heard someone whisper his name. He stopped in the middle of the hall and looked around, trying to figure out where it had come from. The third floor was quiet and dark, just like it usually was at six o’clock in the morning. Not many people found themselves up this time of day.

Something shifted in the darkness and Axl moved his hand to his hip only to realize there was nothing there. He hadn’t had a gun in over a year and he knew there were no zombies lurking in the shadows anymore, but old habits died hard. Especially when those habits were what kept a person alive.

He dropped his hand to his side and tried to relax as he took a step forward, but his heart was already beating faster. The shadows moved again and the long figure that appeared left no doubt in Axl’s mind who it was. In his whole life he’d never met anyone as tall as Joshua.

“Shit, doc,” Axl said, “you nearly scared the piss outta me.”

“Sorry, I just wanted to catch you alone.” Joshua looked around like he thought someone might be listening. “So we could talk.”

The nervous way he held himself piqued Axl’s interest, but he was running late, so he nodded down the hall. “Walk with me. I gotta get to work.”

Joshua didn’t say a damn word the whole way down the stairs, but Axl let him be, figuring he was busy thinking something through and he’d get to the point when he was ready. But even when they’d made it outside the doc still didn’t talk, not until they’d reached the rapidly growing group of shacks just down the street from their apartment building.

“What do you think about that?” Joshua asked, nodding at the statue that some wacko had put up. It was supposed to be Angus, but it didn’t look a damn thing like him.

“Try not to.” Axl spit when they passed it. The thing always made him feel sick to his stomach.

“Yeah.”

Joshua went back to being silent, and even though the doc had never been much of a talker, there was something about the way he was acting now that just didn’t seem right.

Axl stopped walking and turned to face him. “Why don’t you tell me what you’re thinking?”

Joshua shoved his hand through his hair. “A lot of things, actually.” He looked around and once he was sure they were alone, went one. “Like why we’re bothering to stick around when none of us trusts this government.”

“Rumors are just rumors,” Axl said even though he had to admit that Joshua had a point.

The doc had been working at the CDC for two years now and hadn’t learned a damn thing, but to Axl that didn’t mean there weren’t secrets. He wasn’t fool enough to believe that Angus was alive, not after all this time, but that didn’t mean he thought everything happening in this city was on the up and up. He’d been around enough to see that the CDC was grasping for power every chance they got.

“It isn’t just the rumors anymore,” Joshua said. ”It’s how everyone acts. It’s the fact that I’m pretty sure Dr. Helton or someone in there is keeping tabs on us. At least on you.”

“Why would anybody watch me?” Axl asked.

He didn’t know why, but he suddenly had a very bad feeling about where this conversation was going, and when Joshua took a deep breath, it seemed to confirm to Axl that he was about to get some very shitty news.

“I think you might be immune.”

“Shit,” Axl muttered, trying to wrap his brain around the whole thing.

From anyone else he might have dismissed the claim as crazy, but he knew Joshua well enough by this point to know that he didn’t jump to conclusions. Even when it came to the top secret areas in the CDC he’d been hesitant to think they were anything other than normal. All facilities had areas that were blocked off to everyone but authorized personnel, he’d said. The CDC was just being cautious.

“I can’t be.” But even as Axl muttered the words, he knew it wasn’t true. He and Angus had only been half brothers, but they were blood, and it was totally possible he’d inherited the same immunities his brother had.

“There’s only one way to know for sure,” Joshua said.

Axl looked up so he could meet the doctor’s gaze. “You wanna test my blood?”

“I do.”

“Why? What’s it matter? So what if I’m immune, what does that do for us?”

“Nothing other than tell us that the CDC is hiding things. They tested all of us when we came in, just like they do with everyone else who comes through that gate, and we were all told we weren’t immune. If you are, that means they’ve been lying to us for two years.”

Axl pressed his lips together and thought it through. Joshua was right, but that didn’t mean he was excited about the whole thing. For one, it sure as hell would stir things up. Vivian was pregnant and they were happy, and the last thing he wanted to do was drag her through the mud when there was nothing they could do to change things. Then there was Angus. If this was true and Axl was immune, that’d force him to rethink what had happened to his brother.

“Axl?”

He looked up to find the doctor watching him, waiting for an answer.

“I ain’t sure I wanna do it.”

“We should find out.”

“I know, but that don’t mean I want to.”

“I can draw the blood today.”

Shit.

Axl kicked at a rock and let out a deep breath. “Fine.”

“Meet me at Mike’s?”

“Four,” Axl said, shaking his head as he headed down the street. “I’ll meet you at four.”

Axl tried to stop the question from popping into his head as he headed to work, but it was impossible.

Was Angus alive?

Just thinking about it made him want to hurl. Angus was his brother and for all the shit and rough patches they’d been through in their early years, he’d come around in the end. He’d been a changed man. Putting others first, helping out. It wasn’t something he did easily because it wasn’t how they’d been raised, but he’d been doing his best and he’d been taken from this world too early. Axl had always thought that. Before Angus had even had a chance to be rewarded for everything he’d done, he’d up and died and it hadn’t been fair. Life was hardly ever fair and Axl had always known that, but his brother had deserved more. He’d deserved the chance to be the man he should have been all along.

The workday dragged, probably because Axl was barely thinking about what he was doing. He’d promised the doc they’d meet at four, but the closer the time got, the more he started dreading it. This whole thing was bringing up too many questions and he wasn’t looking forward to trying to figure it all out. He just wanted life to be simple. He wanted to be able to settle down with Vivian and raise their kids, but he had a strong feeling that this whole thing was going to flip everything upside down all over again, and the knowledge made him sick.

He was headed to meet up with the doc when he spotted the lady on the corner. Ruth Ann was her name. Axl had seen her before—they’d had to chase her away from their apartment more than once—but it still got under his skin every time they crossed paths. She was a fanatic and out of her damn mind. Maybe she’d always been crazy or maybe she’d just gone nuts when her daughter almost died from a zombie bite—it wasn’t that far-fetched, Axl couldn’t imagine losing Megan. Either way, he didn’t care just as long as she stayed the hell away from him and his family.

Today the woman was standing on the corner holding a sign that said Angus James will return to save us all. Are you ready? Axl snorted and rolled his eyes, but what he really wanted to do was rip that sign out of her hands and break it in half.

“Repent!” she yelled so loudly that her voice shook. “The zombie virus was a punishment from God, and if we are to be free of the vermin that now plague our planet, we must repent and accept the help of God’s vessel. If we are diligent, Angus James will return to save us, this time destroying the zombies once and for all.”

Most people ignored her, but Axl knew The Church was growing. They’d set up in a building across town last year, but just last week he’d heard that they were petitioning the government for a larger one. From what people were saying, she had her sights set on an old church that had been sitting empty for the last two years.

Axl walked faster, hoping to get by without being noticed.

His luck had never been that good, though, and he hadn’t gotten far before she yelled, “You!”

He froze even though he knew he should run, and when he turned to face her, she was already heading his way. Her pale blue eyes were wild and crazy-looking, and she was flapping her arms to get people’s attention, but all it did was make her look like she was trying to fly away.

“Behold!” she yelled again, looking around to make sure she had everyone’s attention. “The brother of Angus James.”

She brought her arms around so she could motion toward Axl, and it made him think of all the times he’d passed that damn shrine and seen people kneeling in front of it. He had the sudden fear that this crazy woman was going to drop to her knees and start praying to him too, and that was the last thing he wanted to happen.

“The blood of our savior flows through this man, and if we have enough faith, he too will become immune.” She raised her arms above her head, motioning to the sky. “Then he will rise up and lead the charge in tearing down the walls of our oppressors, allowing the dead into our city so Angus can come again and save us all.”

“Holy fuck,” Axl muttered, backing away from her. “You’re outta your damn mind.”

Everybody on the street was watching him, staring like they were seriously considering what she’d just said. It didn’t make any sense. A person couldn’t be this screwed up in the head and still get people to follow them. Could they?

Of course, he knew they could. History told him that.

“Stay away from us, you hear me?” he said as he backed away faster. “I told you before and I mean it. Stay away from my family.”

Axl turned and took off, jogging down the street as her voice echoed after him. His heart was pounding, but even worse was the sinking in his gut. This was a new twist in The Church’s beliefs, and something he didn’t want getting spread all over the place. The last thing he wanted was to have a statue that was supposed to be him pop up in the city, but even worse was the thought that soon he and Vivian would have a baby and it would get dragged into this insanity too.

He’d calmed down a little by the time he reached the apartment, but the climb up the stairs helped even more. Instead of stopping at the third floor, he went up one more flight and headed to Mike’s place where he knew the doc would already be waiting for him.

“You get chased by zombies on your way here?” Mike asked when he opened the door.

Axl snorted as he stepped into the apartment. “Zombies woulda been better than that crazy woman from The Church.”

Mike made a sound that came from deep inside him, but Axl couldn’t tell if it was a grunt or a laugh. “Saw her earlier today myself. That woman needs some anti-psychotic drugs and fast.”

“No shit,” Axl said, dropping onto the couch.

“Got in a shipment of Skoal,” Mike called on his way to the kitchen.

“Shit.” Axl shook his head and grinned. “Angus loved that stuff.”

It had been a habit that Axl had hated at the time, his brother always carrying an empty can around so he could spit into it, but he felt different thinking about it now. It didn’t really make sense because no matter how he looked at it, the bulge in his brother’s lower lip had been disgusting, but somehow it had turned into a good memory over the years.

“I remember,” Joshua was smiling too when he came out of the kitchen. “He’d drag us into gas stations and stores in the middle of nowhere looking for the stuff.”

He took a seat and set a black bag on the table. When he unzipped it, Axl’s stomach dropped because he knew what was coming. A blood test. The one good thing that crazy woman on the street had done was distract him from the uneasiness that had been following him all day. Now, though, as Joshua pulled out a couple syringes and an alcohol pad, all the doubts and fears came rushing back.

“A bad habit don’t go away just ‘cause the world ended,” Axl replied, trying to focus on the memory of his brother and not the dread that was threatening to consume him.

“No, I guess not,” Joshua replied.

The doc went quiet as he ran the alcohol pad over the inside of Axl’s arm, right at the crook of his elbow. He looked away when Joshua reached for the needle. Not because he was scared of it, though. No, it was more like he didn’t want to think about what this test could mean for them.

The prick of the needle was fast, and then the tourniquet was loosened and blood spilled into the vial. Axl watched it fill, his mind going back to all the blood they’d seen before coming here. Sometimes he had to think back to how things were before they got here so he could remember why they put up with all the shit going on around them. Sometimes the memories of those weeks and months on the road were the only things keeping him from packing their shit up and leaving. Whether or not he was immune and whether or not Angus was still alive, there were things about this place that he didn’t like, things that made him nervous for the future and his family, but even he had to admit it was better than being out there. Better than running and hiding and searching for safety even though you were pretty sure such a thing didn’t exist.

“You really think we outta go back?” Axl asked Joshua as the other man slid the needle out of his vein. “To Colorado, I mean.”

“Maybe. If not there we could go somewhere else. Somewhere closer. An unsanctioned town, maybe. It’s something to think about, that’s for sure.” The doc handed him a cotton ball, frowning. “It might take a few days to get the results,” he said as he got up. “I have to be careful about this.”

“Yeah.” Axl stood too, pressing the little piece of cotton against the crook of his elbow. “Take your time.”

He wasn’t in a hurry to find out the answer, but he didn’t know what that said about him. Did he think he could really be immune to this thing? It had never occurred to him before, but that didn’t mean anything and Axl knew it.

“You ready for this?” Mike called from the kitchen.

Joshua rolled his eyes but headed over anyway, and Axl followed. They rounded the corner to find Mike grinning and holding up a bottle of Woodford.

“Got this today, too. I considered selling it—it would bring in a lot of credits—but I decided to be selfish. Who knows if I’ll ever get another one.” His smile faltered as he filled three glasses.

When Mike handed him the glass, Axl took it without hesitating. He’d never been much of a drinker—an alcoholic mother will do that to a person—but at that moment he needed a drink to settle his nerves. He didn’t want Vivian to know a thing about the blood test, at least not until he had the results, and unless he was able to get his body to relax a little, he was pretty sure she’d be able to see it written plainly on his face the second he set foot through the front door.

“To—” Mike hesitated with his glass held in the air. “Shit. I don’t have a fucking thing to toast to.”

“Just means you need more than one drink,” Axl said.

He clinked his glass against the other man’s, then Joshua’s, and then threw the liquid back.

Axl only had to live in suspense for three days. It wasn’t long enough, though, and when Joshua came to see him at work in the middle of the day, he knew what the results were before the doctor had said a word.

“We need to talk.” Joshua looked around like he was afraid everybody on the construction crew was listening in. “Now.”

“Shit,” Axl muttered, pulling his safety goggles off. “Not really sure I want to, but okay.” He tossed the goggles aside as he looked around. When he spotted the foreman, he yelled, “I’m takin’ a break.”

The other man barely took his eyes off his work as he nodded.

Jim looked up as they passed, but he didn’t follow. Axl was relieved. The fewer people who knew about this thing the better off they were.

“They sure are throwing these apartments together,” Joshua said as they headed out, careful to step over the lumber and other supplies laying everywhere.

“Gotta. People are campin’ on the streets ‘cause they got no place to sleep.” Axl snorted. “Which is dumb as shit ‘cause there are plenty of buildings the government is usin’ for other stuff. And what the hell do we need with all them bars?”

“It keeps people sane.” Joshua looked his way as he shoved the front door open. “People need a way to blow off steam.”

“People need a distraction from what’s really goin’ on is more like it,” Axl muttered as they stepped outside.

The sun was bright and warm and beating down on their heads like it was trying to burn them alive. It was only May, meaning they had the whole damn summer to get through still, and Axl wasn’t looking forward to it. It was too hot here for his taste. It made him miss all the snowy days in Colorado more than ever.

“How’s Vivian feeling?” Joshua asked when they stopped on the sidewalk.

Axl pulled a cigarette out, a habit he’d picked up from Jim, and lit it. “Better now that she’s done with the first trimester. Far as she’s concerned, though, November can’t get here soon enough.”

He inhaled, sucking the smoke into his lungs while he waited for the doctor to get to the point. He’d been hoping the cigarette would calm his nerves, but it wasn’t working like he’d wanted. His hand shook when he put the thing to his lips a second time, and even though he didn’t want to, he looked up to meet Joshua’s gaze.

“You’re immune.”

It shouldn’t have felt like a bomb, not when he’d known already, but it did. And not just any bomb. It felt like an atomic bomb. Like the one they’d dropped on Japan back during WWII. It made Axl’s stomach jump to his throat, forcing the smoke he’d just inhaled up into his nostrils. He coughed, and once he got started he couldn’t stop and neither would his stomach. It crawled its way through his body, clawing at his insides, and before he knew it he was puking his guts out. Right there on the sidewalk.

“Take it easy,” Joshua said from behind him.

He patted Axl’s back awkwardly, making him think of Megan and how he’d pat her back when he was trying to get her to go to sleep at night. Then he was thinking about the baby and what this would mean for it. Would it be immune too? Would it be safe staying here?

“Shit.” Axl wrapped his arms around his stomach and leaned against the wall.

“I know.”

The doc didn’t say anything else and Axl’s eyes were closed so he couldn’t even come close to figuring out what the other man was thinking. He just knew that he was thinking about all the ways this could have been different. They could have stayed in Colorado. Could have run somewhere else when they’d found out Angus was immune. If they’d done that he’d still be alive, and probably Hadley and Jon too.

“We shoulda never left Colorado,” Axl said.

“I’ve been thinking about that, about what you said the other night, I mean. We could go back you know.” Axl cracked one eye to see if he was joking, but Joshua looked dead serious. “Why not?”

“It’s a long fuckin’ way, that’s why.” Axl realized his cigarette was still between his fingers and tossed it aside. It landed in the pile of puke and his stomach rolled. “It took a lot out of us gettin’ here and we lost people. And that was before. Now Vivian is pregnant.”

“Ginny was pregnant when we left Colorado.”

Axl frowned up at him. “That turned out real good, too, didn’t it?”

“No.”

Joshua shook his head and Axl felt like an asshole, knowing the doctor blamed himself for all that had happened. It wasn’t his fault, though. They’d been on the road trying to get here and Ginny had been a month early when she’d gone into labor. Joshua had done everything he could, but he was just one man and without a hospital his hands had been tied. She’d died of complications only a day after giving birth, leaving Megan behind for them to take care of.

“You did the best you could,” Axl said.

The doctor just shrugged.

“Anyways, we got kids in the group now. And things are bad out there. I know that most of what they print in the National Newspaper is a lot of bullshit, but the stories come from someplace, and I wouldn’t doubt that the raidin’ has gotten bad. We don’t got the numbers to deal with zombies and raiders, not with three babies in tow.”

He didn’t even want to mention the fact that there was no way in hell the CDC would let him leave. If they knew he was immune, which there was no reason to think they didn’t, he wouldn’t be allowed to just walk out the front gate. No, they’d think of a reason to keep him here or go after him, and then who knew what the hell would happen.

“You’re right.” Joshua exhaled, but then turned his gaze on Axl. “But this? What the hell does this mean? You’re immune and the CDC knows it. So why lie? What are they doing in there that they decided to keep something this huge from you? And don’t even get me started on the rumors about Angus.”

Angus, shit. Axl had been so focused on what this whole immunity thing meant for his family that he hadn’t even thought about his brother. Was this proof that Angus was alive? Wouldn’t they need Axl if his brother was dead?

But he had to be dead, Axl had seen his brother with his own two eyes and he could remember exactly what he’d looked like. All hooked up to machines. Pale. Brain dead. He’d sustained too many injuries on their way in, putting himself between them and the horde of zombies because he’d known that he would be able to survive the bites. But he’d lost too much blood and they hadn’t been able to save him. That’s what they’d said…

Now, though, Axl found himself doubting everything he’d been told since walking through that gate.

As much as he tried to force things to go back to the way they were before he learned he was immune, Axl found it impossible. He found himself constantly looking over his shoulder when he was out on the streets of Atlanta, certain that he was about to be dragged to the CDC. He dreamt about Angus being locked away, about his baby, who hadn’t even been born yet, being taken from them at birth. Sleep, which had never been an easy thing to accomplish, became nearly impossible, and he found his fingers itching to feel the cold steel of a gun once again.

He had one, which he’d gotten on the black market, but carrying it around was illegal and the last thing he wanted to do was get the CDC angry at him. Which was why he found himself seriously considering a change in careers. Parvarti, who had recently been promoted to Judicial Officer, had been bugging him to come work for them since the day they’d arrived in the city. For the past two years he’d brushed her off every time she brought it up, but now, faced with the knowledge that he’d be permitted to carry a gun with him if he made the switch, he found himself actually considering it.

“The government is going to be doing some restructuring,” Parvarti said later that night at their weekly Friday night dinner.

Everyone was crowded into his and Vivian’s apartment, the group feeling much too big for the tiny space now that they had toddlers, and Parvarti had once again brought up the idea of Axl coming to work the wall.

“That right?” he said, trying to sound uninterested even though he was very interested.

“With the population increase, crime has skyrocketed, but the guards aren’t equipped to deal with it. We’re supposed to be keeping an eye on zombies, not people. That’s been our whole purpose over the last two years, but Star has finally acknowledged the need to expand the job.”

“So we’re going to be police now,” Al piped in.

“Enforcers,” Parvarti corrected. “You know how Star loves to come up with his own term for everything.”

Axl nodded because he did. It was something he’d noticed from their first day in the city. They no longer had money, but instead credits. There were no mayors or presidents, but instead a council and a Regulator. Most people probably wouldn’t give the change a second thought, but Axl had always thought it had something to do with erasing all the old ways and creating a whole new world where Star had the ultimate say in everything.

“Having law enforcement is way overdue,” Vivian said, rubbing her hand across her round stomach absentmindedly.

The sight of her rapidly expanding belly sent a pang through Axl and made him itch for that gun again. He wanted it at his side all the time, loaded and ready so he could defend his family if need be. And not just from the zombies, which had been his main concern when Star had first taken the weapons from him. Axl wanted to be able to fight off anything that might come their way.

“You still hirin’?” he asked, causing everyone to look his way.

Parvarti lifted her eyebrows but she didn’t look surprised. Joshua sat at her side, his hand on her knee, but he avoided Axl’s gaze. Had he told her what was going on? He’d wanted to, but the thought had made Axl squirm and Joshua had agreed to keep it quiet. Even if he hadn’t been in love with the idea. Not that Axl was either, especially when it meant lying to Vivian, but he couldn’t stomach the thought of making her worry. Couldn’t handle the idea of putting stress on her when she was pregnant.

“We are,” Parv said.

“What?” Vivian shook her head and he wanted to curse. He should have talked to her about it in private first.

“Just a thought,” Axl said, trying to sound casual. “There’s talk ‘bout running out of places to renovate and things are already gettin’ slow. Plus, I’m a good shot and I like to think I’d be useful to Parv. Might be a good idea to contribute more.”

“We could use you,” Parvarti said.

Vivian shook her head again. “I don’t like the idea of you doing that.”

“It’s not unsafe,” Al said. “Not really. I mean, it’s not like he’s going to be a zombie slayer.”

Everyone seemed to shudder at once. That was a new position that seemed both foolhardy and pointless. People who took the job were allowed to go in and out of the city as they wished, and they earned their living killing zombies. Axl couldn’t understand why anyone in their right mind would be interested in that job.

“Damn fools,” Jim said.

At his side, Amira nodded and leaned into him like she was trying to keep him close so he didn’t decide to take up the career.

“Why would anyone want to do that?” she said.

Axl nodded but he could almost see the draw in it. These people had the best of both worlds. They got credits and help from the government that the unsanctioned settlements weren’t entitled to, but they didn’t have to stay inside the walls. They could live anywhere they wanted to, come and go as they pleased and not put up with Star’s bullshit rules. They were allowed to carry guns, as many as they wanted. If you didn’t have anyone waiting for you at home the way he did, Axl could almost understand why a person would risk it.

“It’s a way to get away from the control Star has over everyone,” Al said. “I’ve heard some of the people who took the position talking about it, and it honestly makes sense.”

“You can’t be serious,” Lila said.

“I’m not saying I want the job.” He patted her leg with his stump. “I’m just saying things here aren’t as bright and shiny as we hoped. There are too many rules. Too many regulations. Honestly, lately, I’ve been thinking more and more about going back to Colorado.”

Lila sat up straighter. “What? You never mentioned this before.”

“I know. It’s just a thought, but let’s be honest, wasn’t it better there? Things were more laid back, more relaxed. It was tough getting here, but now there are shipments that go back and forth between the cities, meaning we could hitch a ride. Wouldn’t you like to see everyone again? Brady, Sophia, Ava, Anne.” Al avoided looking at Joshua and Parv. “We have friends there.”

“He has a point,” Vivian whispered.

Axl couldn’t believe it. Not once had she mentioned to him that she would like to go back to Colorado, and the idea that she’d be willing to risk the trip now, when she was finally pregnant, made no sense.

“You wanna go back?”

She shrugged. “I liked our little gated community, and I feel bad about leaving Brady. Every time I talk to him I can hear the sadness in his voice, and even though he says he’s doing okay, I know he’s lonely. I know he’d love to have us come back.”

“But the kids.” Lila looked down at the sleeping baby in her arms.

Charlie, who looked so much like her mother even at such a young age, was quiet now, but Axl knew firsthand how loud the wail that came out of her could be when she got upset. Megan too, who was older now but still just a toddler, and Luke who was only ten months younger. They had too much to lose, too much that could go horribly wrong.

“It’s too dangerous,” he said, shaking his head. “We can’t risk it.”

Everyone nodded, but Axl couldn’t help noticing that it was halfhearted and he knew the subject wasn’t over.

He patted Vivian on the arm and said, “We’ll talk about it again after the baby’s born. See if we can figure somethin’ out.”

There was enough going on without this headache, Dr. Helton thought as she scanned the transcript in her hand. I’ve been thinking more and more about going back to Colorado. Al’s words from the night before had every alarm in her head going off. If Star got wind of this he would have Axl brought in for sure, and Dr. Helton knew that would destroy Angus.

She read the rest of the conversation, gnawing on her bottom lip as she tried to figure out what to do. It had ended with Axl agreeing to talk about it again after the baby was born, but even that didn’t ease her worries. It was something she’d never thought about before, the group wanting to return to Colorado. She should have, though. She knew they had friends there and that Vivian still spoke with some of them on a weekly basis, and she also knew how loyal these people were. As long as the settlement in Colorado was still standing, they would always have a place to fall back on. Which meant Dr. Helton had to make sure the settlement was wiped off the face of the earth.

Phillips was the obvious answer. The woman and her team of mercenaries were always available for a covert mission when Star needed it. Not only had she been the one to bring Test Subject 02 back from Key West, but she’d been sent to extract the next immune survivor they found as well, bringing this one back from Dayton. Not that the man had lasted any longer than Test Subject 02 had, but at least they’d gotten him back quickly and in one piece.

Yes, Phillips would be the perfect person to take care of Colorado. She could get her team there in two, three days tops, and make the whole thing look like a group of raiders. They had an arsenal at their disposal, and piles of explosives. By the time they left Colorado, not a single person would be left standing.

It took less than two hours to make the arrangements, and by the mid afternoon, Phillips and her team were on the way. Dr. Helton didn’t bother consulting Star, mainly because she was afraid that he’d simply decide to bring Axl in, but it didn’t matter. Phillips would be back in a week and then she’d fill him in. Lucky for her, Star preferred that Dr. Helton take care of things without bothering him as much as possible.

It wasn’t until she’d taken care of that ticking time bomb that she sat down to look over the rest of the transcripts she’d received. Dr. Helton always saved the ones from Jim and Amira’s apartment for last because they were so much harder to go over than the others. There were a lot of silences now that Jim had actually picked up on some sign language, and more often than not the pages were full of pauses. Not to mention the fact that these two had sex more than most hookers.

JIM:
I’M
NOT
SAYING
I
WANT
TO
BE
A
ZOMBIE
SLAYER, I’M
JUST
POINTING
OUT
THAT
THERE’S
A
LEGITIMATE
REASON
BEHIND
IT. I
MEAN, YOU’RE
THE
ONE
WHO
IS
CONVINCED
ANGUS
IS
STILL
ALIVE.

(A
PAUSE.)

JIM:
I
KNOW
WHAT
YOU
HEARD. I
BELIEVE
YOU. I’M
JUST
SAYING
THAT
JOSHUA
HASN’T
FOUND
A
THING.

AMIRA:
THAT
DOESN’T
MEAN
IT
ISN’T
TRUE.

(A
PAUSE.)

JIM:
I
KNOW. I’M
SORRY. I
BELIEVE
YOU, OKAY? MAYBE
IT’S
HIM. MAYBE
HE’S
ALIVE. WHAT
ARE
YOU
GOING
TO
DO
ABOUT
IT? NOTHING. THERE’S
NOTHING
WE
CAN
DO.

(A
PAUSE.)

JIM:
YOU
CAN’T
BE
SERIOUS. YOU
CAN’T
GO
AROUND
TELLING
PEOPLE, AMIRA. WHAT
DO
YOU
THINK
THE
CDC
WILL
DO
IF
THEY
FIND
OUT? THEY’LL
KILL
YOU. PROMISE
ME
YOU
WON’T
TELL
ANYONE
ELSE. PROMISE
ME
YOU’LL
BE
CAREFUL
FROM
NOW
ON.

(A
PAUSE.)

JIM:
I
CAN’T
LOSE
YOU. I
CAN’T. IT
WOULD
KILL
ME.

(KISSING.)

JIM:
FUCK.

(MORE
KISSING.)

Dr. Helton put the transcript down. Whoever had typed up the transcript had gotten creative in filling in the blanks, and the explicit content that followed would have made her blush if she hadn’t been seething. Things were suddenly spiraling out of control. These people were too smart, too involved, and now Amira had told someone what she’d heard that day in the CDC. Who? The family, that much the doctor knew, but since they hadn’t spoken about it since those first few weeks that Jim and Amira were in the city, she’d assumed they’d disregarded the rumor. Maybe everyone else had, but Amira hadn’t, and despite the girl’s promise to Jim, Dr. Helton knew they couldn’t risk more people finding out. Something had to be done.

That night, she left the CDC for the first time in months. She was dressed in clothes she’d had to dig out of the bottom of her drawer. Jeans that hadn’t seen the light of day in years, but luckily still fit, and a long sleeve shirt that she hoped didn’t look too conspicuously clean for where she was going.

The entertainment district was booming, which was to be expected at one o’clock in the morning even though Dr. Helton couldn’t understand why anyone would want to waste time here. It reeked of trash and stale booze, and the air was thick with disease. She passed men and women slumped against walls, too out of it from drink or drugs to even notice when she stepped over their legs. The laughter that wafted from the open doors she passed seemed to contrast with the gloomy atmosphere, but she knew that people these days were desperate to distract themselves from what was going on around them. She also knew that Star allowed this part of the city to exist for that very reason. So people who might otherwise open their eyes and notice what was happening would instead be distracted by the drinking, drugs, fights, and prostitution offered in this part of the city. One day, after Star had created his army, this area and all the people who liked to slink through it would be wiped out.

She had considered taking care of Amira herself, but had instead consulted a few CDC guards who had set this meeting up for her. The man she was meeting was named Mick, which sounded too innocent for someone who was about to kill an innocent woman, but all the doctor had to do was take one look at him to change her mind.

He sat in the back of a sleazy bar waiting for her to arrive. The air in the place felt slimy against her skin and her feet stuck to the floor as she headed back. Mick was big and broad, and had a shaved head and a beard that went down to his chest. It was brown and wiry and made the doctor itch just looking at it, but not as much as his meaty hands did. Those were the hands that would very soon squeeze the life out of Amira, and the thought made her shrink away when he held one out to her.

Mick shrugged when she didn’t accept his offer and nodded to the chair, but the doctor didn’t sit.

“Mick?” she said even though she knew it was him. The guards had told her that she’d be able to recognize him by the huge skull tattooed on the side of his head.

“That’s me.” He picked up a filmy glass and threw the contents back. “You got the credits?”

She nodded and held out the envelope.

He took it, peered inside, and then shoved it in his back pocket. “Waitress at Dragon’s? Small, dark skin and hair, deaf?”

Dr. Helton nodded. “That’s her.”

“I’ll take care of it.”

He took another drink and the doctor shifted from foot to foot, wondering if her part was done. It seemed too easy, hiring a man to kill a woman.

“Is that it?” she asked when he just stared at her.

“Unless you have something specific you want to happen.”

“Such as?”

“Maybe you want me to cut her ear off and send it to a family member, or another part of her body. Some people want me to take my time, make sure the victim really suffers. You’re the one paying.”

Dr. Helton swallowed. “I just need her to shut up.”

“She won’t be able to talk after tonight.”

Mick’s callousness when he spoke about killing someone shook her to the core, which made no sense. Hadn’t she had a hand in killing millions of people? Hadn’t she done things a thousand times worse than what he was talking about? The answer to both questions was yes, but for some reason, standing in front of this man and thinking about the small woman he would very soon kill made the doctor feel ill.

“Make it fast,” she finally said. “And nothing sexual. I’m not paying you to get your jollies.”

Mick eyed her, but nodded. She knew there was no way to guarantee he would listen, but it was the most she could do. She had to make sure Amira kept her mouth shut and this was the only way. It was her responsibility. Everything she and Star had planned was on her shoulders.

“Good.” She nodded once before turning away, but paused after only one step so she could look back at Mick. “If you screw this up you’ll find yourself in a position a million times worse than anything you’ve ever inflicted on another person. I may not look like much, but let me assure you, I am your worst nightmare.”

The expression on the big man’s face told the doctor that he believed her.

It hadn’t taken them long to find her body. Jim woke before the sun was up only to find the other side of the bed empty and cold. He thought Amira might be in the living room, that she had come home from work exhausted and fallen asleep on the couch. It had happened before. Since calling for her would be pointless, he stumbled into the living room, prepared to carry her to the bed. Only she wasn’t there. Not only was she not asleep on the couch, but she was nowhere in the apartment and there was nothing to indicate that she’d come home at all the night before.

His first instinct was to panic, but he remained calm and instead checked with everyone they knew, waking all their friends much earlier than he should have, asking if they had any idea where Amira was. No one had seen her, though, and by the time he was done, everyone on their floor was awake and panic start to set in.

Al and Parv got dressed and went with Jim to report the disappearance, and even though they both did their best to assure him that nothing bad had happened, deep down he knew they were wrong. Before he even spoke to Dragon and found out that she’d headed home at the usual time, before they began to search the area around the bar, before they found her shoe in an alley, Jim knew.

She had seen too much, told too many people. He had never once doubted her when she’d told him what she’d overheard at the CDC, but he’d done his absolute best to discourage her from telling anyone else. Only it hadn’t helped and now she had paid the price. And Jim was going to have to live with it.

Her body was discovered in an alley only a block from their apartment. The dark and stinking street backed up to the small collection of shacks that had recently sprung up, shantytown they’d begun to call it. She was naked and cold, and had been dead for hours. That was probably the worst part. Jim realizing that as he’d slept peacefully in their bed only a block away, she’d been here, lifeless and cold and exposed to the world.

After they buried her, he tried to get back to his normal life. Only there was nothing normal about it. He couldn’t stomach the thought of sleeping in the bed he’d once shared with Amira, he spent most of his credits on booze, and he avoided everyone he knew like they were responsible for her death. At night he’d roam the entertainment district, asking too many questions and risking too much, hoping that against all odds he’d somehow be able to find out who had killed her. But more often than not he was drunk off his ass, meaning that even if he’d had any leads, he wouldn’t have accomplished much. If anything.

She’d been dead for a month when he decided he’d had enough. He applied for a license to be a zombie slayer, took the necessary tests to prove that he could actually fire a gun and defend himself in the wild world beyond the wall, and then headed out. He didn’t tell anyone goodbye or promise to return, but instead left a note on Axl’s door that simply read:

I’m leaving.

-Jim

The world had changed in the two years that he’d been inside. It was overgrown and wild, and the houses closest to the city were so stripped bare that they provided almost no cover from the elements, meaning he’d have to head further away from the city if he wanted to find cover.

Not that it mattered. Jim wanted nothing to do with New Atlanta, wanted to leave and forget the place had ever existed. So he walked. For two days he did nothing but travel the empty roads with no real idea of where he was going. When he came upon a few zombies, he killed them, collecting the ears the way he was supposed to just in case he ever decided to head back to collect his bounties. If he crossed a horde, he took cover and waited until they passed. He was pretty sure that he’d left the city with the intention of dying, but he had no desire to let the asshole monsters who now ruled this world rip him to shreds. They’d already won the war, there was no contest, but he wouldn’t let them take him down. Not now, not ever.

It wasn’t until he’d been out on his own for two weeks that he came across the first living, breathing people. He’d taken cover in a shitty little house that had creaky floorboards and dusty furniture three days before when a storm had come through and never bothered to leave. Winter was moving in, bringing chilly nights that helped combat the humidity of the day, and being in the house was better than anything else he’d done since leaving the city. His feet ached and were covered in blisters from walking, and he knew he was starting to smell. His beard itched, as did his head, but he couldn’t bring himself to take the time to shave. In fact, he couldn’t make himself do much of anything but sit on the couch and stare at the picture of Amira.

It was the one she’d taken from her house when they’d left. Her parents were in it, as was her younger brother, and she barely looked like the woman he’d known. But the picture and his memories were all he had, and the memories hurt too much to dwell on.

That’s what he was doing when the front door burst open. He had no shoes on and the picture was in his hand instead of his weapon as a group of people rushed inside. They didn’t notice him at first, too preoccupied with getting in and getting the door shut, but the second it was closed one of them was on him.

“Shit,” a man hissed as he shoved the barrel of his shotgun in Jim’s face. “Don’t move. Hear me? Don’t you fucking move.”

Jim barely even blinked, but it had nothing to do with the man’s gun or the order that had been barked at him. It was because he wasn’t afraid. The opposite really, he was perfectly okay with this guy blowing his head off.

“Dammit,” muttered someone behind the shotgun toting man in front of Jim. “It’s bad. They got him. Shit.”

“Shoot me. Just do it,” a third man moaned.

Jim leaned forward, causing the man with the shotgun to push the barrel harder against his forehead. Without thinking, he shoved the weapon away, barely registering what he had done. He was too focused on the scene playing out in front of him. There were four people in all, three men and one woman, and one of them was injured. A guy who couldn’t be more than thirty and was bleeding all over the place had his left shirtsleeve pulled up to reveal a bite on his wrist.

“Kill me,” the injured man said again.

That’s when Jim got up. “Cut it off.”

All eyes turned his way and the guy with the shotgun hopped closer to him, nudging him with the barrel once again.

“Calm the fuck down,” Jim muttered as he stepped closer to the others. “You need to cut off his hand.”

The woman blinked as she stared up at him. “You’re nuts.”

“How do you even know it will work?” the third guy said while the injured man looked up at Jim with hope-filled eyes.

“I know someone.” Jim knelt. “A guy who was bitten and lived. They cut his arm off. It’s been years now and he’s fine.”

The woman looked him up and down and frowned. “How do you know? You look like you’ve been out here for a long time.” She looked past him to the empty room. “There’s no one with you.”

“He’s alive.” Jim reached back and pulled his knife out. It was big, with a serrated side that was perfect for sawing through bone. “Lives in New Atlanta.”

“That where you’re from?” the guy with the shotgun asked.

He hadn’t put the weapon down and having it shoved in his face over and over again was starting to get to Jim.

“Yeah. Will you put that thing down? I haven’t done a damn thing to threaten you.” He nodded to the injured man. “You need to get a tourniquet on his arm and do it fast.”

For a moment no one moved and Jim thought they weren’t going to listen, but then the woman stood and pulled her belt off.

“Let’s give it a try,” she said.

The guy was still bleeding when they got back to the unsanctioned town these people called home, but he ended up living. It made Jim a kind of hero that he hadn’t really wanted to be, and even though he had no real desire to hang around anyone, let alone a town that was still too close to New Atlanta for comfort, he agreed to stay for dinner.

The town he found himself in was nothing more than a group of houses surrounded by an impressive steel wall. There were several gates and reinforced beams inside and out, but as far as Jim could tell, the population inside the wall wasn’t big enough to have accomplished such a major feat in such a short time.

“How’d you do this?” he asked Gretchen, the woman he’d met in the house.

“It was here.” Her gaze moved across the wall slowly. “It was the set for a television show.”

That was when it hit him. Of course. He’d been in prison when the outbreak started, but even inmates had the privilege of watching The Walking Dead. In fact, the show had been so popular that it probably would have been considered a human rights violation to deny them access to it.

“Shit,” he muttered.

Gretchen just nodded. “I know. I was a big fan, lived only a few towns over when it all started. I figured this was the best place to go if I wanted to be safe from zombies. Turns out, I wasn’t the only one.”

“I’m surprised more people didn’t come here.”

“Most headed to Atlanta and the promise of a vaccine and government. We heard about it, but we also knew a few people who had been up there and left. They said there was something off about the man in charge, Star I think his name was.”

Jim nodded. “There’s a lot off about that asshole.”

He didn’t intend to stay, but a day turned into two, which turned into a week, and before he knew it he found that he wasn’t even thinking about leaving. He went out on runs with other people in the settlement, traveling to distant towns in search of anything useful. He killed zombies, learned to hunt game, helped bring supplies in. He worked and started to feel better, but he never forgot, and he never felt whole.

Vivian had delivered her baby only a week before, a girl they named Margot, meaning Dr. Helton was forced to do the thing she’d been avoiding: visit Angus. She didn’t want to, but she knew she had to tell him the news or he would never forgive her. Of course, the question of why she cared what he thought about her was one she refused to focus on.

“She immune?” he asked when he heard the news, voicing the question she’d known was coming.

The doctor felt her back straighten. She was as far away from him as she could get and still be in the room, but just the sound of his voice affected her. Made her want to run to him, to touch him and kiss him and—

“She is.”

His face scrunched up like he was going to spit. “You gonna steal her?”

“Nothing has been decided yet,” she said elusively. Already she was inching toward the door.

It was true, but that didn’t mean it hadn’t been discussed. Star had already started calculating how long it would be before they could bring the girl in, which had only led to more talk about Test Subject 06. The conversation had nearly plunged Dr. Helton into a deep depression, and standing in front of Angus, having his angry gaze bore into her as he flung silent accusations her way only made the whole thing worse.

It had also made her flee.

She’d spent night after night following that visit wide-awake and unable to get her brain to shut off, and she swore to herself that she would never see him again. Getting Angus James out of her system was much more difficult than it should be, and she found herself reliving the last time they were together until it hurt so much she was certain it would kill her, but still she couldn’t stop thinking about it. Couldn’t stop thinking about him.

He had asked her to bring his daughter to visit, but Dr. Helton found herself holding off, knowing that visiting him would reopen wounds that had barely begun to close. Still, the more time that passed, the more she ached from being away from him. She found herself in the observation wing more and more often, couldn’t stop from watching him through the window. The gray eyes that stared back swam with accusations while at the same time mirroring the longing that lived deep inside her, and she felt certain that Angus wanted her to come to him almost as much as she ached to visit. By the time Test Subject 06’s first birthday rolled around, she felt like she would go mad if she didn’t give in.

Dr. Helton hadn’t seen the child since that day in Angus’s cell, and when she first laid eyes on the little girl, slipping into the apartment Helen had been given, the sight nearly took her breath away. Test Subject 06 had grown so much, but what was even more amazing was the striking resemblance she bore to her father. She had his smile, something the doctor had only seen one time, but it was long enough to have thoroughly ingrained the image in her memory. She could picture it perfectly when she closed her eyes at night, could hear his laughter.

Even more heartbreaking than the smile, though, were the eyes that peered up at her. Smoky gray, they were the same shade as the clouds that preceded a spring storm.

“What are you doing here?” Helen asked, her coarse voice shaking with fear. She held the child tighter to her chest as if afraid the doctor had come to take her away.

“A visit.” Dr. Helton took a seat on the couch. “Pretend I’m not here.”

Helen did her best, but it seemed as if she found it nearly impossible not to look at the other woman every five minutes. She and the child ate dinner, then played with some blocks, but it was late and before long Helen had the little girl wrapped in a warm embrace. She rocked the child back and forth, singing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star in a raspy voice that was oddly beautiful and haunting, and the little girl’s eyes fluttered a few times before finally shutting.

Once she was sure the baby was asleep, Helen laid her in her crib before turning to the doctor. “You’re taking her somewhere, aren’t you?”

The only other time Dr. Helton had visited was the day she’d gone to see Angus, so it made sense that Helen knew why she was there. “Yes, but just like last time, I will bring her back.”

The other woman nodded, relief flashing in her eyes, and then, almost as if the doctor wasn’t there at all, she went about the process of cleaning up their small apartment.

Dr. Helton waited until it was nearly two o’clock in the morning to go, knowing that she had to be careful that no one spotted her. The child wasn’t heavy, but she was so much bigger than she’d been the last time they’d made this trip, and the thought caused an ache to spread through her. It eased a little more with each step she took, though, and by the time she’d made it to the observation wing the ache had been replaced by butterflies. The idea of seeing Angus again, of being near him and watching him with his daughter, was exhilarating.

He was asleep when she slipped into his cell, just as he’d been the other times she’d come to him in the middle of the night. Only this time she didn’t take her clothes off and climb into his bed, but instead nudged him with her foot until he stirred.

“Angus,” she whispered. “I’ve brought her.”

He was on his feet in seconds, standing so close that his masculine form nearly overpowered her senses. She allowed him to take the child from her arms before retreating to the other side of the room, afraid to be too close to the man who had somehow worked his way into her soul. Something that until now she’d been certain she didn’t have.

“She’s gotten so big,” he whispered, staring down at his daughter.

“She has.”

He didn’t look up. “Ain’t she a beauty.”

She was, but Dr. Helton remained silent, too engrossed in watching Angus to talk. The way he looked at the child, as if she were a miracle, made him seem softer than he ever had before. It transformed him into someone else. Someone who knew how to love and who was loved. Someone who wasn’t trapped in this building.

She didn’t say a word the entire time she was there. Angus held the child, whispering to her so quietly that even Dr. Helton couldn’t hear him, but he never woke her. For nearly two hours they stayed that way, each of them lost in a world of emotions that were much too complicated to name. It was a peaceful visit. Perfect.

She almost hated to put the visit to an end, but as dawn grew near Dr. Helton knew she had to. Soon the scientists who lived in this building would return to the labs and the guards would wake to start their day, and the longer she stretched out this visit, the more likely it would be that she would get caught.

“I have to go,” she said, getting to her feet.

Angus stood too, not taking his eyes off the girl. “You gonna bring her back?”

“As soon as I can,” she said.

He nodded as he eased the sleeping child into the doctor’s arms. It was dark in the cell, but she could see the emotion in his eyes when his gaze met hers. “Thank you.”

She swallowed. “You’re welcome.”

It wasn’t what she’d wanted to say, but it was the only thought going through her head that she could put words to at the moment, so it would have to do.

She turned away from him, her legs as heavy as her heart was as she once again left him alone in his cell.

The time with Angus had slipped inside her, making it difficult to once again focus on her job. Not that it mattered all that much. The family had become her number one priority and they had been quiet since Amira’s death and the destruction of the Colorado settlement. Whether they’d resigned themselves to their fate or were in denial she wasn’t sure, she just knew that Jim had fled the city, taking the job of a zombie slayer he’d assured Amira he didn’t want, and the others were no longer talking about leaving New Atlanta.

Though Star rarely left his office, he was involved in nearly every decision that was made inside and outside this building. He chose which stories would go in the National Newspaper and which laws would be enforced, carefully considering every detail in hopes of keeping the people living in this settlement in line. So it was no surprise when he called her into his office to run an idea by her.

“The population has seen a major increase over the last few months,” Star began. “We’re getting crowded and it’s become impossible to build new housing units fast enough. Not to mention the fact that we don’t have a lot of room to expand. I don’t want to send just anyone to the prison settlement in DC, though. We need to be selective about who goes there.”

“The shantytown seems to be working out,” Dr. Helton said.

Star lifted his eyebrows and she began to wonder if she’d said something wrong. She felt out of sorts. Drunk or drugged, she wasn’t sure which; she just knew she didn’t feel like herself anymore.

“Yes.” The way he drew the word out seemed to emphasize the fact that he expected more out of her. “But it’s also ripe with illness. The people are living in squalor, and even though we both know I have no problem letting people suffer, I’m afraid it’s going to cause illness to spread through the settlement. One we can’t control.”

“Then why not release one you can control?”

The words were out before she’d had a chance to think them through, but saying them was almost a relief. Not only was it a good idea—she could tell by the gleam of appreciation in Star’s eyes—but it also made her feel more like herself. She’d been afraid that her growing feelings for Angus had stripped her of the edge she needed to continue her work, but they obviously hadn’t.

“That’s an idea.” Star folded his hands on the desk in front of him as he nodded. “What do we have?”

“There’s a flu,” she said. “Something we developed a few years ago. We have the vaccine already and it can easily be administered to anyone we want to stay healthy. Once the right people have been safeguarded against illness, we can release the flu on the general population and let it run its course.”

“It has a survivability rate?”

“Yes.” Dr. Helton thought back to the bug she’d worked on before the outbreak. “Sixty percent was our best guess.”

“Good.” Star nodded three times. “Yes. Taking out forty percent of the population will help with our overcrowding problem. Make it happen, will you?”

She stood, suddenly grateful to have something other than Angus James to occupy her mind. “I’ll take care of it.”

Test Subject 06 had just turned two, meaning they’d taken yet another visit to see Angus. This time he’d risked waking the girl, giving him a chance to watch her toddle around the room. She was speaking now, only a few words here and there, but enough that she and her father were able to sing a few songs together, although the girl’s version sounded nothing like it was supposed to.

For days after the visit Dr. Helton couldn’t get the image out of her mind, Angus singing with the child, the two laughing and smiling together. It ate away at her, made her desperate to change the course she was on. The girl had been created for the sole purpose of being a test subject and it had been Dr. Helton’s idea, but thinking about it now made her ache inside and out. Knowing that it would rip Angus apart, that it would hurt him more than anything ever had.

There had to be another way.

That’s how she came up with the plan to create a new vaccine. Of course, it wasn’t actually a new vaccine, but a virus specifically designed to infect a fetus. She and Star had talked about what needed to happen to create the type of creature they wanted, how it would have to be a hybrid of some kind, half human and half zombie. It was during that conversation that Dr. Helton had realized the best way to achieve it: while the child was still forming inside the mother.

The virus was easy to manipulate, but what she needed was someone she could test it on. Someone she could keep an eye on, someone who was healthy and strong, who would be likely to carry the child to term. It was mere coincidence that Joshua came into work smiling from ear to ear only a few days after her search started, but Dr. Helton couldn’t help thinking that it was a sign. A gift, really.

“Parv’s pregnant,” he declared happily.

Since she hadn’t yet received the weekly transcripts—they were only rushed to her if something big happened—the doctor didn’t have to act surprised by the news.

“Congratulations.”

He jabbered away as he started his work, not noticing that she barely responded. She was hardly listening because she was already thinking about the man at her side and how she would be able to convince him to inject his wife with an experimental vaccine. It was a long shot, and if he didn’t agree she could always have a midwife tell his wife she was iron deficient and inject the woman with the virus that way. There was more than one way to skin a cat.

Luckily, Joshua gave her the answer when he said, “Of course we’re still worried. I mean, the number of babies dying from the virus has dwindled, but it still happens.”

The way he frowned almost made her change her mind and instead pick a random woman up off the streets, but then she thought of Angus, of his daughter. Of what she would be able to save the little girl from if this was successful.

“We’ve developed this new vaccine.”

Joshua froze with a slide halfway to the microscope in front of him. “What is it?”

“We’ve already tested it a couple times with good results. We’re giving the drug to pregnant women in hopes that a baby will be born immune. This could be a real turning point.”

Joshua was nodding, but he didn’t smile and the expression on his face was thoughtful.

Hoping to convince him, Dr. Helton found herself going off on a tangent, creating fake statistics about the drug and how successful it had been during trials.

“You know what this could mean for other areas, right?” she said. “Here we’ve seen a major decrease in infant deaths, but in other places mortality is still pretty high. The CDC has given us the edge, but not everyone is that lucky. This could change all of that. With just one injection during pregnancy, we can bring the human race back from the brink of extinction.”

“I wouldn’t exactly classify the human race as being on the brink of extinction,” Joshua said. “There are still plenty of us here. The settlement is so crowded people have been building shacks so they have shelter, and there are sanctioned settlements all over the country. Not to mention all the unsanctioned ones.”

“But the flu that went through the settlement just last year is a testament to how precarious our situation really is,” Dr. Helton argued. “We lost nearly half the people living in the settlement. That’s hundreds of survivors who made it through the zombie virus only to die of the flu. We’re teetering on the edge of disaster. One major outbreak and we could be done for, so the more babies that survive, the better off we are.”

Joshua’s gaze moved to the floor but she could see the cracks in his certainty, knew that he was considering it. All she needed was to play on his emotions just a little more and he’d be convinced.

“I just wish—” She forced the words to come out shaky, blinking over and over again in hopes that it would make her eyes teary. “I wish we’d had this sooner. Maybe my baby wouldn’t have died. Maybe she would have survived.”

Joshua looked up. “You would have tested the vaccine on yourself?”

“In a heartbeat,” she whispered. When a tear slid down her cheek, it was nearly impossible not to smile.

The next morning she requested to have the transcripts from the pervious night sent directly to her. When she got them, she eagerly scanned the pages until she found the one where Joshua brought the vaccine up. They had been having dinner at Axl and Vivian’s at the time, which made Dr. Helton’s heart pound. What if someone talked Joshua out of it? What if someone had enough foresight to realize an experimental vaccine was a bad idea?

JOSHUA:
WHAT
DO
YOU
THINK
ABOUT
GETTING
THE
VACCINE?

(A
PAUSE.)

PARVARTI:
THE
NEW
ONE?

JOSHUA:
OF
COURSE, THIS
COULD
CHANGE
EVERYTHING.

VIVIAN:
ISN’T
IT
KIND
OF
NEW?

JOSHUA:
IT
IS, BUT
THIS
IS
ABOUT
OUR
BABY’S
LIFE.

(A
PAUSE.)

PARVARTI:
WHAT
DOES
EVERYONE
ELSE
THINK?

VIVIAN:
I
DON’T
KNOW
IF
WE
CAN
WEIGH
IN
ON
THIS, PARV.

LILA:
IT’S
YOUR
BABY.

JOSHUA:
BUT
YOU
HAVE
KIDS
AND
YOU
WENT
THROUGH
ALL
THE
SAME
FEAR
WE’RE
GOING
THROUGH. WHAT
IF
SOMEONE
HAD
OFFERED
THIS
VACCINE
TO
YOU
WHEN
YOU
WERE
PREGNANT
WITH
CHARLIE? OR
MARGOT? WOULD
YOU
HAVE
DONE
IT?

(LONG
PAUSE.)

VIVIAN:
I
WOULD
DO
ANYTHING
I
COULD
TO
MAKE
SURE
MY
BABY
WAS
SAFE.

The conversation veered off after that, but hours later, after everyone had left, Vivian and Axl talked about it again. Dr. Helton read it just to make sure the woman hadn’t changed her mind and decided to talk Parvarti out of it.

AXL:
YOU
THINK
THEY
SHOULD
DO
IT? SEEMS
LIKE
A
BIG
RISK.

VIVIAN:
IT
IS. HONESTLY, I
DON’T
KNOW. MAYBE
I
SHOULD
HAVE
STAYED
OUT
OF
IT, BUT
I
HAD
TO
TELL
THE
TRUTH, WHICH
IS
THAT
I
WOULD
DO
ANYTHING
TO
MAKE
SURE
OUR
KIDS
ARE
SAFE.

AXL:
SO
YOU’D
TAKE
IT
IF
YOU
GOT
PREGNANT
AGAIN?

VIVIAN:
I’M
NOT
SURE. MAYBE. I
JUST
WANT
EVERYTHING
TO
WORK
OUT. I
WANT
US
TO
BE
HAPPY. I
WANT
JOSHUA
AND
PARV
TO
BE
HAPPY
AND
I
WANT
TO
STOP
LOSING
PEOPLE. IT
WOULD
BE
NICE
IF
WE
COULD
LIVE
IN
A
WORLD
WHERE
OUR
KIDS
DIDN’T
HAVE
TO
WORRY
ABOUT
DEATH
ALL
THE
TIME.

AXL:
THAT’S
WHY
WE’RE
HERE.

(LONG
PAUSE.)

VIVIAN:
IS
IT?

AXL:
IT’S
WHY
WE
CAME. IT’S
WHY
WE
GOTTA
HOLD
ON.

Dr. Helton was prepared when Joshua showed up in her office. Prepared to look surprised, prepared to ask the right questions that made her sound concerned and caring, but also ready to do what needed to be done. She cautioned him while at the same time lacing the warning with words of hope and promise, and he bought it. He sank his teeth into the promise of hope and swallowed every bite, and less than two hours later his wife was leaving the office, the virus flooding her system and hopefully creating the hybrid zombie of Star’s dreams.

When the child was finally born, they woke her, and even though she had been sound asleep, she dragged herself out of bed and hurried to the observation wing. This baby had been a desperate attempt to change the course of things, one that would most certainly send her to hell if she hadn’t already been on the way there. If they could achieve their goals this way, they would be able to spare Angus’s child. At least that’s what she told herself, although a voice whispered in her ear that Star would insist on moving forward no matter what happened. That if this hybrid was the answer they’d been looking for, he’d just create another puzzle that needed to be solved.

Joshua had been all too eager to give his wife the drug in the end, something that had caused Dr. Helton only a moment of guilt. The fact that she knew the vaccine was a death sentence for the baby—and possibly for the mother—was a sacrifice that would all be worth it if she was able to spare Angus any more pain. Why she cared so much about whether or not Test Subject 01 was hurting was a question she still didn’t care to reflect, but it was also something she couldn’t escape no matter how hard she tried.

“Did the mother survive?” she asked when she swept into the lab.

The nurse on the other side of the room looked up from the table where the infant lay. “She did. They had to preform a hysterectomy, though. The baby ripped her to shreds on the inside.”

A shudder shook Dr. Helton, but she pushed the feeling off. She couldn’t allow herself to get emotionally invested in anyone else if she was going to achieve her goals, which meant not thinking about the pain Joshua’s wife must have gone through. What she needed to focus on was if the drug had done what it was supposed to do and what the downfalls of creating a hybrid this way would be. For example, if the infant ripped the mother to shreds, the host would only be good for one offspring. Meaning they would have to find a new woman for each creature.

The nurse stepped aside when Dr. Helton approached, and she got her first good look at the baby. It wasn’t a baby, though, that much was obvious. Its eyes were milky white and its movements jerky and uneven. It thrashed on the table violently, and even before she allowed it to grasp her finger in its hand she could tell it was much stronger than any normal infant. The child’s grip was sturdy, and it tried to pull her finger to its mouth.

“Boy or girl?” she asked as she pried her digit from the baby’s fist.

“Boy.”

Dr. Helton wasn’t sure if the sex of the baby mattered or not.

“What are we going to do with it?” the nurse asked.

“We’re going to watch it grow and see if it’s the link we’ve been missing,” she responded, still staring down at the child.

It was no surprise when Joshua came to her office a few hours later. He was a mess. His clothes were disheveled and his eyes were red and puffy. She knew that her actions had devastated this man, and even though she fought against it, the knowledge actually made her feel something. She hated that.

“Joshua.” She stood halfway, but sat back down when he dropped into the chair across from her desk. “Are you okay?”

“Tell me it was an accident,” he said, meeting her gaze head on, like if he stared at her hard enough she’d give something away.

Dr. Helton kept her gaze even and unemotional. “I don’t know what you mean. Has something happened?”

“Parvarti had the baby.” He shook his head. “No. It tried to rip her apart and they had to do an emergency C-section.”

“My God,” she said, but her voice came out too flat and she knew he wouldn’t be convinced. Not that it mattered. What was done was done and there was nothing he could do to change things now. “Is she okay? Is the baby?”

“Parv’s alive, but they had to—” His voice broke. “The baby turned inside her. Something, a new strain or the vaccine we gave her, turned it into a zombie. They had to destroy it.” The last two words were so shaky that she barely caught them.

“Joshua,” she said, reaching across the desk like she was going to comfort him. She sat back when he shrank away from her. “I’m sorry. This is… This has never happened. I told you we tested the vaccine on other women and it was successful. Maybe it is a new strain.” The idea was something he had come up with, but it was an easy lie to grab hold of.

“What if it isn’t?” he asked. “What if it was the vaccine?”

Dr. Helton let out a deep breath like she was thinking it through. “I don’t know. I wish I could tell you definitively, but I can’t. You and I both know that drugs affect everyone differently, and it’s always possible—” She broke off, pretending to have a difficult time going on. “We won’t use it again, we can’t take the risk. I’ll have it destroyed. I swear to you.”

Joshua’s gaze dropped to the floor. “Thank you.”

He didn’t move, but Dr. Helton found herself wishing he would leave. The utter devastation on his face was hard to take, especially when she was working so hard at reigning in her newly discovered emotions.

After a minute or so, Joshua dragged himself to his feet. She stood, hoping to convey respect and empathy, but he didn’t seem to notice. He didn’t look at her again before leaving the room.

When he was gone she sank back into her chair and closed her eyes. That had been more difficult than she’d thought it would be. She didn’t know where these feelings were coming from, but she did know she couldn’t let them take hold. She’d fought to push them away over the years, knowing that she needed to be stronger than this if she wanted to succeed. She’d been successful too, at least until Angus had come into her life.

Dr. Helton hadn’t always been this way. She’d grown up in a good family with parents who cared about her but had struggled to make ends meet in a world that favored the educated. Her father had worked as a security guard at a bank while her mother cleaned houses, and as she’d grown older and had seen how difficult life was for them, she’d decided that she would not struggle her whole life the way they had. She worked hard in school and did well, earning scholarships that paid for college and paved the way for her success.

The deeper she got into her studies, the more she felt the need to change. She saw her female classmates drop out one by one as they chose marriage over education, then later watched as the ones who had graduated chose to raise children instead of have a career. All of them had been driven at one time, but there had come a point in the other women’s lives when they’d allowed their emotions to get in the way. Love stole things from you, that much Dr. Helton knew for sure. It robbed you of your common sense and drive to succeed and took away your identity. She had refused to let that happen to her.

So she’d worked hard to become as clinical as possible, to push away the empathy that had persisted in making an appearance during the early days of her residency, instead focusing on the academic aspect of things.

Meeting Star had helped. He was the very definition of cold and detached, and she’d found herself modeling him, watching him for clues. It was how they became so close, working side by side at the CDC and eventually in secret to create the virus. In those days most people had thought they were a couple on the side, but Star had his wife—a silly woman who stayed home and kept him fed—while Dr. Helton had her job and the knowledge that she didn’t need a man for anything.

She’d become a statue of who she used to be, cold and hard on the outside and just as rock solid within, but she now knew that keeping people at arms length had been what had helped her achieve that. Had she known this about herself when she’d come up with the idea to breed Angus, she never would have offered her own body. She’d forgotten what it felt like to have another person’s skin touch hers. How warm it was. How comforting. The feeling had woken something in her that she’d been positive had died, and now that it was conscious, it wanted to break free. It wanted more. More of Angus, but also more of everything else.

But she knew she couldn’t let it thrive. She’d gone too far, done too much. There was no turning back.

At least not until she saved Angus’s daughter.

The hybrid didn’t thrive the way they’d hoped. It was alive, it’s heart still beating, but it refused bottles and there was little else they could feed it since it had no teeth. At first they attempted to give it nourishment intravenously, but the baby thrashed so much that the tubes were constantly ripped from its little arms.

They considered the idea that the child might not need food at all. It was a hybrid, after all, and the zombies roaming the earth didn’t need flesh to keep going, they just craved it for some reason no one could quite understand. But after only one day of no attempts to feed it, the child grew weak and lethargic.

The most problematic part of the whole thing was finding someone to take care of the infant. When Test Subject 06 was born, Helen had taken her without even a moment’s hesitation, but no one wanted to care for an infant that might infect them with a simple scratch, and it soon became too much work with no payout in sight.

“It was a nice try,” Star said.

Dr. Helton stood at his side and together they stared through the observation window. The nurse inside the room wore gloves that extended to her elbows as she prepared the final IV the infant would ever receive.

“I thought it would work.” Dr. Helton didn’t mean to sound so dejected, but she knew it wouldn’t matter. Star would never suspect the real reason for her disappointment had to do with the child she and Angus James had created together.

“We’ll have more success using the test subjects’ blood to create a virus.” He turned away from the window. “Test Subject 06 will be three soon. She should be strong enough by then, so we’ll ease her into the tests.”

Dr. Helton couldn’t move for a long time after Star left.

For the past two years Dr. Helton had gone to get the child on her birthday, but the third one was much different than the others had been. It started with an unannounced early morning visit, catching Helen completely off guard. The child’s guardian seemed to know immediately what was going to happen and even though her brown eyes were full of regret and anger, she didn’t fight them when they took Test Subject 06 from her.

The tests started out small. They took her blood pressure and temperature, measured her height and weight, all things that any normal child would go through at a doctor’s visit. Then they drew blood, something they hadn’t done since she was born and then only a little so they could see what kind of antibodies she had in her blood. Dr. Helton did the procedure herself while the nurse held the girl down, and the little cry the child let out seemed to pierce the doctor through the heart. She’d never felt anything like it, and the pain refused to go away for the rest of the day, growing worse when they injected Test Subject 06 with the virus for the first time.

By the time they returned her to her apartment, Dr. Helton felt certain that she was having a heart attack.

She went back that night, just like she usually did, but this time when she slipped into the room she was met with hostility and fear. The girl shrank away from her while Helen glared, and the emotions swirling through the air were enough to make the doctor want to turn and run.

But she knew Angus was expecting them, so she followed through, taking the sleeping child to him in the middle of the night as usual.

He saw the Band-Aids on his daughter’s arms the second he took her and the cold stare he shot Dr. Helton made her shrink away. “What’d you do?”

“You know,” she said. “You’ve known all along this was coming. Don’t act like it’s a surprise.”

He cradled the little girl in his arms and turned his back to the doctor, whispering words as he gently woke her. She was only three and hadn’t seen her father for a year, but she smiled when she saw him like she remembered. Dr. Helton didn’t know if was possible or if she was just responding to the gentle tone of his voice and the soothing way he held her.

She sat silently while Angus talked to her. He told her stories about his brother—her Uncle Axl—and tickled her. He brushed the hair off her forehead with a gentleness that Dr. Helton had never known could exist and handed out smiles like he was Santa and it was Christmas morning. She watched it all happen with an eagerness she hadn’t known could exist, gobbling up every word Angus uttered and every smile he gave the child and storing them away for later when she knew they would haunt her.

When he handed the girl back a few hours later, he wouldn’t look her in the eye. “Keep her safe.”

“I’m trying,” she said, but she knew he didn’t believe her.

If only she could tell him what lengths she’d gone to in order to protect her. Of course, she had a strong suspicion he wouldn’t want to know what she’d put the people he loved through, so she kept it to herself.

“This is my job,” she said instead, as if that were a good excuse for what she’d done. She knew that few people other than Star and herself would see it that way, and even she was starting to doubt that the things she’d done were worth the end result they were trying to achieve.

Angus didn’t reply.

She continued the tests, but each day it grew harder and harder to forget the girl’s cries. They haunted her at night when she shut her eyes, followed her into her dream world and refused to be silent no matter what she did. After nine months of weekly tests, the lack of sleep was starting to affect her and Dr. Helton knew that she had to pull back.

She saw the expression in Star’s eyes when she told him. It wasn’t suspicion, but he also wasn’t surprised, and what he said next startled her more than anything.

“I thought the job might be too much for you.” He didn’t even blink, which almost made Dr. Helton change her mind. “No problem. Dr. Wade can take responsibility for Test Subject 06 from here on out. You have plenty of other things to keep you occupied, anyway.”

She swallowed as she stood. “Thank you.”

“Jane,” he called before she’d even taken one step. “Have you given any thought to breeding the test subject again?”

“I haven’t,” she whispered.

“Perhaps if we can create a male offspring the results will be different. Both James and his brother seem to be stronger than any of the females we’ve found, so it might be worth a try. Give it some thought.”

She nodded. “I will.”

“Very good,” Star said, going back to his paperwork.

She left thinking about what he’d suggested, but she was afraid to give it too much thought. If she did she might consent, if for no other reason than to have an excuse to go back to Angus at night. It had been three years, but she could still feel his skin on hers. Could still remember the tenderness of his touch. She thought about it every night.

Test Subject 04 was hard to ignore. No, impossible.

Helen had signed on with Star shortly after the outbreak had wiped nearly everything out. When it all started she’d been working in the ER, at first desperate to help anyone she could, then just going through the motions as she waited to catch the virus herself, knowing that it was hopeless to resist. She hadn’t caught it, though, and as the medical staff dropped off one by one, she soon found herself alone.

That’s where Star had found her. He’d waltzed into the hospital one day, clean and healthy in a black suit, and found her sitting in the waiting room. Dozens of bodies had been piled up around her, but none of them had come back yet. The earlier dead had been taken to the morgue, then to other parts of the hospital, and the remaining bodies were still too fresh to have turned. Luckily for her, because if Star hadn’t come in when he did, Helen most likely would have been taken by surprise and wouldn’t have made it out of the hospital alive. She’d been in shock, after all, sitting in the middle of the waiting room smoking, right next to the body of a teenage girl.

Star’s appearance had been an even bigger shock, though. He was a small man, but formidable, and the clean lines of his suit stood out in stunning contrast to the bloated bodies that filled the room. He’d stopped in front of her and looked down, studying her like he was trying to decide if she was healthy or half dead.

She’d felt half dead at that point. It had been weeks since she’d gotten more than two hours of sleep at a time and at least two days since she’d eaten. The electricity was long gone and the water had turned off the day before, and she knew that she probably smelled as bad, if not worse, than the dead bodies surrounding her.

“Are you healthy?” Star had asked when she hadn’t spoken.

She nodded and took a drag off her cigarette—the last one she had—and her hand trembled so much that the ashes dropped onto her lap. She knew she should brush them away, but she couldn’t move to do it.

Star knelt and did it for her, his eyes taking in every inch of her as he did. “You’re a nurse?”

“An RN,” she said, and her voice came out even more gravelly than before.

“Good.” He stood and held out a hand. “We need medical personnel.”

“We?” she asked, not taking his hand. She couldn’t figure out where this man had come from but she had a very strong suspicion that he was a dream. He didn’t seem real. He was too clean, too put together. He was too fresh to be in this world.

“My name is Dr. Garret Star and I’m the director of the CDC.” He grabbed her hand when she refused to take his and pulled her to her feet. “We’re working on a vaccine and we need people with medical training. We need you.”

They needed her.

For some reason, that stuck out more than anything else he’d said. The fact that other people were alive when she’d been almost certain that she was alone and the knowledge that the CDC was working to fix things should have made her cry with joy, but the concept of someone needing her was what she fixated on, because she couldn’t imagine living in a world where she didn’t have a purpose. She couldn’t imagine drifting through life with no objective.

“You need me?”

“We do,” Star said, leading her toward the exit. “We have doctors and nurses, but we need more if we’re going to make this better. There are survivors, but this virus is still a threat.”

Helen had squinted when she stepped out into the bright sunshine, her eyes no longer used to the light of day. Star, though, hadn’t slowed as he led her down the sidewalk to the parking lot where a car that was as black and sleek as his suit sat waiting for them.

“What kind of threat?” she had asked, sensing by his tone that she had missed something while nursing the sick.

Star stopped walking and turned to face her. “Have you been inside this whole time?”

Helen’s eyes were slowly starting to adjust, as was her brain, and she was able to get a good look at the man next to her for the first time. He was shorter than she had originally thought, probably no more than three inches over five feet, but broad and impressive. His eyes, which were a dark shade of brown, were intense and intelligent, and his features so chiseled that she had the odd feeling she was looking at a cologne ad. Everything about him was authoritative and imposing, despite his size, and he exuded intelligence.

“Yes,” she said, drawing her gaze away from the man in front of her so she could look around.

The world she’d known had disappeared in the days that she’d been stuck in the hospital. Before the virus it had been loud and bustling, and then chaotic and desperate as people poured into the emergency room, hoping for a miracle. Now, though, there was nothing but silence and death, the scent of which hung heavy in the air and teased her nostrils.

Helen’s stomach turned, but it was too empty to do much else, and her knees shook as the reality of what had happened slammed into her. “Everything is gone.”

“Not gone,” Star replied, “Different.”

She was about to turn her gaze on him when movement caught her eye and she instead looked the other way. Someone was walking toward them, their gait slow and labored, their feet dragging across the pavement.

Another person! This morning she had been certain that she was alone, and then she had seen Star, and now this person was heading her way. It was almost too much to believe. The world hadn’t slipped away after all. People were still alive and the CDC was working and they would be okay.

“Get back,” Star said, grabbing her arm.

He knocked on the car’s window and a second later the passenger door was thrown open. A woman climbed out, she was short but solid and dressed in camouflage, as well as armed with an automatic weapon. Helen stepped back, certain the woman was going to kill her, but the soldier instead stepped between the newcomer and her, raising the weapon and taking aim.

“What are you doing?” she called, horrified but unable to stop it from happening.

The woman opened fire, her shots ringing through the air and pounding into Helen’s temples. She screamed and tried to run, but Star grabbed her. His fingers dug into her arm as he pulled her against him, hugging her in what would have been a comforting embrace had he not been so stiff and had the woman with the gun not been standing next to them.

The sound of gunfire was replaced by Helen’s sobs. She tried to break away from Star but he was surprisingly strong for such a small man and she was too weak from lack of food and sleep to fight him.

A few seconds later, sounds that could only be described as moans filled the air, coming from all directions. The car doors were ripped open and Helen was shoved into the back. She wanted to run but there was nowhere to go.

Then she caught a glimpse of the things coming toward them and the desire melted away. They were people, but they weren’t human. There was something wrong with them. Either they had gone insane from the virus or had been infected with something else.

“What are they?” she asked as the car began to drive, speeding past the approaching monsters.

“The dead.” She turned to find Star frowning. “They come back. After the virus kills them, they come back. They will attack you. Kill you if they can.”

“Zombies,” she whispered.

The absurdity of the word wasn’t lost on her, but it was all she could think to compare them to. The crazy thing was, Star didn’t correct her.

They rode the rest of the way in silence, but once they arrived at the CDC, Star started talking again, telling her about the facility and what they were trying to accomplish. He took her deep into the CDC where there were bunkrooms and showers, and plenty of food and clean clothes waiting. They had everything they needed to survive, almost as if they had been prepared for the disaster. She was able to get clean for the first time in weeks, able to eat and then get a good night’s rest. The next day, she was handed cartons of cigarettes and told where she could get more, then shown around by a pretty blonde doctor who smiled as if most of the world hadn’t disappeared.

Helen wasn’t dumb, though, and she could read between the lines, especially when she saw Star interact with the other doctors. He wasn’t telling her everything. There was more to the story and it hadn’t escaped her notice that every one of the surviving medical professionals just happened to be experts in their fields. How had they all made it? How were they all immune?

Weeks passed and more survivors were brought in. They set up living quarters in the city, then expanded into apartment buildings as the weeks turned into months. Soon they had plans for a wall and Atlanta was transformed into a safe haven where people flocked by the dozens. Life was moving forward. People were starting over.

But there were other things going on in the CDC, things that had Helen paying attention. She started working in the clinic, giving medical attention to the survivors who came in, but before long she was moved to a different part of the building. A top secret section that few people had access to, where zombies were locked in rooms and studied for weaknesses and who knew what else. Not Helen, that was for sure.

She rarely saw Star after that first meeting, but she knew he had a hand in everything that happened. Dr. Helton, the pretty blonde who had been so friendly on her first day at the CDC, was the one in charge of that wing, but she rarely smiled, and it didn’t take Helen long to realize that it had all been an act. A way of making her feel at ease so they could see if she was someone who could be trusted.

She went through life hesitantly, although she did her job to the best of her ability. Nothing she had seen up until that point had been suspicious, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. That behind closed doors the CDC held secrets so dark they would give her nightmares.

She’d been working with Dr. Helton for close to six months when the first human was brought to the top-secret part of the CDC. Seeing him behind the glass, strapped to a table and wearing nothing but a hospital gown, shook Helen to her very core. She’d known from the first day that something was off, but she’d stayed and worked because here she had food and clothes and electricity, and out there the world was mad with death and disease. But this, bringing a human being here to experiment on, was unforgiveable. There was no way to defend it. No way that Star or anyone else could convince her that it was okay.

Dr. Helton entered the hall while Helen was still standing at the window, staring at the man.

“Who is he?” Helen asked, unable to look away from the terrified eyes that stared back at her.

“A criminal.” The doctor stopped at her side but said nothing else.

“Criminal?” Helen turned to face her. “What did he do?”

“He attacked a child. We don’t have a prison and we need subjects to test our vaccine on. I know it sounds cruel and extreme, but this is the world we’re living in now. We can’t have men like this—” She waved toward the room at her side. “—running free, and we need to do everything we can to develop the vaccine. The continuation of the human race depends on it.”

She was right. Helen hated to admit it, but the doctor was right. They couldn’t let someone who would attack a child go free, but the only other option was putting him to death. And they would need subjects to test the vaccine on, so why not use this man, this monster? It made sense, as horrifying as it was. Helen was a medical professional after all, and the wellbeing of the people in this settlement had to come first.

“Can you do it?” Dr. Helton asked after she’d given Helen a reasonable time to think it through. “Can you work back here knowing that you may have to see things like this? That you may have to participate in things like this?”

“Yes,” Helen had said with certainty.

And she had. She’d drawn blood and been there when the prisoner was injected with the virus, and then the vaccine. She’d observed him as the virus took hold, killing him in a torturously slow way, then waited to see if he would turn afterward. She’d done it again weeks later with another vaccine, then again with the next, and each time she’d felt less and less guilty about the process. This was for the greater good. Even though she still suspected that Star and his team of scientists were doing things she wasn’t privy to, she was working toward the greater good.

Helen hadn’t felt a moment of guilt until the day she met Angus James. Everyone knew about the man. He was immune. He’d risked his life to come to the CDC so they could create a vaccine. He was the hope for mankind. The world, including his family, thought he had died, but he hadn’t. Instead he turned up in one of the rooms, weeks after his trumpeted arrival, and Helen was tasked with drawing blood.

He was unconscious at first, and then groggy as he came off the drugs. By the time he was fully alert he’d become violent, so much so that he gave the first doctor who went in to see him a bloody nose. After that armed guards were present anytime someone entered his room.

The first time Helen went to draw blood while he was alert, she was shaking. There were guards behind her, armed and ready, so she couldn’t figure out why she was trembling so much. She wasn’t afraid that this man would hurt her, she knew Dr. Helton had taken care of that, but something about him scared her.

It wasn’t until she met his gaze that she understood. His eyes, a medium shade of gray that reminded her of storm clouds, swam with pain. There was anger and violence there too, but the pain was what stood out. Looking around, seeing his sparse furnishings and cold surroundings, as well as the guards who would always be there to stop him from leaving, Helen felt guilty for the first time since she’d set foot in these halls.

What they were doing was wrong. They were holding a man, one who had come here voluntarily, against his will. His family thought he was dead and he would never be allowed to leave. He’d spend his life locked away in a cell.

She knew she couldn’t be a part of it, so that day, after leaving Angus, she found Dr. Helton and told her that she wanted to be reassigned.

“I thought you could handle it,” the woman had said. “We need people like you.”

“You have plenty of doctors and nurses and techs. You don’t need me.” Helen didn’t want to tell the woman the truth because she had an odd sense that it would get her killed, so she lied. “I don’t like being around the zombies all day. It’s giving me nightmares. Makes it difficult to sleep.”

Dr. Helton nodded slowly. Thoughtfully. “Very well. We’ll reassign you soon, but I want to keep you close. We can trust you and I have a feeling we’ll be needing you for something else very soon.”

That something else turned out to be the hardest thing Helen had ever had to do.

She’d been told almost nothing about the assignment until the day she was called into Dr. Helton’s office and handed a baby. Test Subject 06. The coldness of it had struck Helen like a blow, but she’d been unable to turn the job down, both because she knew it would be the end of her and because she was terrified of what would happen to the child if she didn’t take care of it.

The baby, a girl, was the most precious thing Helen had ever seen. She and the child were given an apartment at the CDC and Helen became her full-time guardian. She stayed with the baby morning, noon, and night, raising it like it was her own. Loving it.

Helen had never thought she’d wanted children. Before the virus she’d been a compulsive dater but, never really seeing the need for kids or family, had never married. Children had seemed less interesting than partying, drinking, and smoking had. She had her job to keep her company, her coworkers to spend holidays with, and her boyfriends to keep her bed warm. As far as she was concerned, that was all she needed.

The baby changed all that, though. Made her understand love. Made her see the future as something big and bright. She had no idea why the baby was here or what it’s role would be, but she knew that the job she’d been given, although exhausting, was an easy one. No one with a heart could possibly look into the eyes of that little baby and not love it.

Years passed and the child grew. Unable to wrap her brain around calling the little thing Test Subject 06, Helen had taken to simply calling her Baby. It made her smile every time she did, thinking of Patrick Swayze and watermelons and dancing, but it fit the little bundle even as she got older and learned to walk.

Baby and Helen were happy in their little home. The apartment was small but it was theirs, and they had the rooftop garden to retreat to when they needed fresh air. There Helen would smoke while Baby played, digging in dirt and watching birds fly overhead just like a normal child. Things were good and Helen was happy, happier than she had ever been before the virus, and she felt like she had finally found her place in the world.

All that changed when the girl turned three, though. That’s when the daily visits from Dr. Helton started. That’s when the tests began, when they started drawing blood on a weekly basis and doing who knew what else.

Helen hated seeing Baby in pain, but she was powerless to stop it. She’d been able to brush every other person aside, to forget her part in the suffering that happened inside these walls. The criminals who were brought in and used as test subjects had been easy to forget, as had Angus James once she hadn’t had to look him in the eye anymore. But this, seeing the child she’d raised as her own in pain, was intolerable. Holding Baby while she cried, seeing the bruises from the blood they were drawing, listening to her screams from the nightmares that plagued her sleep, it nearly ripped Helen apart.

She couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, and she knew things would only get worse. She noticed that Dr. Helton, too, was struggling. Each time she came for Baby the scientist looked more stricken until eventually someone else, another scientist trusted by Star, replaced her.

Dr. Helton did, however, continue to come every year on Baby’s birthday, which was a detail that never escaped Helen’s notice. She would come in the evening each time, slipping into the room without a word as Helen got Baby ready for bed. The doctor wouldn’t interact or talk to either one of them, but would instead sit on the other side of the room and watch. She would stay late into the night, long after Baby had worn herself out and fallen asleep. Helen would make them coffee, knowing it would be a long night, but still they would not talk.

Between two and three o’clock in the morning, long after the lights in the CDC had been turned out, the doctor would scoop the sleeping child up and take her. Where, Helen didn’t know, but she knew after all these years that the child would come back unharmed and oddly happy.

The doctor’s presence had at first unnerved Helen, but as Baby grew she began to understand it. Began to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Baby’s dark blonde hair, the dimple in her left cheek, the curve of her jaw. It became more and more obvious the older the child got.

It wasn’t until her fifth birthday that Helen voiced the question that had been nagging at her for years, though. “Are you her mother?”

Dr. Helton had nodded, unsurprised by the question, but once again said nothing.

“And her father?” Helen, by this point, had figured that out as well. No matter how hard she’d tried to forget them, the sad gray eyes of Angus James had stuck with her, and looking into Baby’s eyes the first time she’d come back from her tests had been a shock she’d never expected.

“Angus James.” The pain in Dr. Helton’s voice was thick.

Helen, unused to the woman even speaking to her, studied the doctor’s face, trying to understand what she was feeling. Regret? Pain? Dr. Helton didn’t seem like the maternal type, but the fact that she would no longer take part in Baby’s tests said something about her. But it seemed like there was more to it. Something that was even bigger than Baby being hurt on a daily basis.

It took years to figure out what it was, though. Dr. Helton continued her job at the CDC, as well as her yearly birthday visits. Helen continued her job of raising the child they called Test Subject 06.

Then Baby turned seven and everything changed.

It happened unexpectedly, the scientist who ran Baby’s tests showed up early in the morning, a group of guards with him. Helen was given five minutes to gather the girl’s things, and then they were ushered from the room. She held the girl in her arms, who was sobbing like she knew what was coming, finding it difficult to hold her own tears back but trying to be brave.

Helen knew what was coming as well, although she didn’t want to admit it. Deep down she’d always known this day would arrive eventually, only she’d hoped that she would have more time. Or that it somehow wouldn’t come at all.

They were led to the observation wing with its bright lights and cells full of zombies. Helen tried to hold Baby closer, thinking the creatures would scare her to death, but the girl perked up the second they walked through the door. Her crying died off and she craned her neck as they passed the cells, almost as if she was looking for someone. Helen walked slower, the realization hitting her. All these years Dr. Helton had come and taken the girl away on her birthday, but it had never occurred to Helen that they would come here, or that the doctor would bring Baby to see her father.

The look on Angus’s face when they passed him was all the confirmation Helen needed, it was a combination of elation and torture, of longing and hatred and love and agony.

Baby’s bottom lip quivered when her mouth turned up into a smile and she gave him a little wave the way only a child can in the face of horror. On the other side of the glass, her father pressed his palms flat against the window, almost like he was trying to reach through it and grab the child up.

Then he was gone and they were at the end of the hall where a door stood open and waiting. Helen stopped outside the room, unable to cross the threshold when she knew what this would mean, but the scientist, a gray-haired stoic man with dark eyes, ripped the girl from her arms. Baby began crying all over again, her whimpers piercing Helen like arrows. The woman screamed and made a dive for the girl, but the guards were there to restrain her. She watched the scientist carry Baby into the room and place her on the bed, and then he left her there, sobbing and alone. The bag Helen had packed was tossed inside and the door was slammed shut, and then the little girl was alone.

The guards dragged Helen down the hall, kicking and screaming the whole time. She couldn’t see through her tears, couldn’t think through the anguish that was ripping her in half. She didn’t see Angus when she passed him, didn’t register it when they pulled her from the hall, barely noticed it when the door clicked shut behind her.

When the guards released her, Helen crumpled to the floor in a giant heap. The scientist who was in charge of Baby’s torture walked away without so much as a word, as did the guards, but Helen couldn’t move.

It took her close to thirty minutes to pull herself together enough to stand, and when she did, the first place she went was Dr. Helton’s office.

“Why?” she wailed when she shoved the door open. “Why!”

“It wasn’t my call.”

Dr. Helton’s stony expression made Helen want to scream, but she suddenly found that she couldn’t utter even a whimper. Her throat was raw. Her body ached inside and out. She felt like a truck had hit her.

It had been harder to suppress her maternal instincts than she’d thought it would be. Labor had been long and painful, but handing the child over immediately had helped ease the ache in her chest. She’d been so tired and hungry and ready for rest that it had been almost easy to watch the nurse carry the baby away. Then she’d slept.

When she’d awakened, though, her first thoughts had been of the baby. Angus would want to know. She’d promised him that she’d tell him, and so she had, and then she’d made the promise to bring the baby to see him and had continued to do it every year after that.

She’d thought it would be no big deal. That she could distance herself from the child and still keep the promise she’d made to Angus. And it had worked out okay; at least until the girl had turned three and the experiments had started.

It was Dr. Helton’s project, so it had made sense that she be the one to draw blood and inject the girl with the virus. Only, it hadn’t been easy to watch the child cry. It had hurt in a way that Dr. Helton had never experienced before. It had made her want to save the child, to take her away and hide her from Star forever.

So she’d stepped back, hoping the maternal side of her would go away if she put more distance between herself and the girl. But it hadn’t, and more and more she found herself thinking of the girl. More and more she found herself counting down the days until the child’s birthday so she could see how she had grown and changed.

Even worse, her feelings for Angus James had grown as well. Seeing him with his daughter year after year, watching the bond between them grow despite the distance, it made him more human to her. Softer. Warmer. Made her want to be with him again the way she had after their time together so many years before.

Dr. Helton had always known that the day would come when the child would be moved to the observation wing, but it had come faster than she’d wanted it to. Star had told her only that morning, had come to her office and dropped the bomb like it was nothing. Helen was no longer needed. Test Subject 06 was old enough to be moved to the observation wing full-time.

The doctor knew that things would get real from here on out. The girl was only seven, but that didn’t mean Star would hold back. The doctors would poke her and prod her, hook her up to machines. They’d inject her with virus after virus until her body gave out. It had happened before. They’d found other survivors who carried immunities, not just the one from Key West, but none of them had what Angus James did, and eventually they had all died. The girl’s blood was the same. She had immunities in it, but they were nothing like the ones her father carried.

Dr. Helton’s daughter would die, just like the other test subjects had.

She had stayed in her office so she didn’t have to see the girl get taken to the wing, and she was unsurprised when Helen came to see her only a short time later. The tears in the other woman’s eyes almost did the doctor in, but she held onto her cool exterior. At least until after Helen was gone.

The ache that had started in her stomach the moment Star told her the girl was being moved only grew as the day progressed. Dr. Helton couldn’t leave her office. Couldn’t even get up from her desk. She stayed there, all day, waiting as the hall quieted down and footsteps became less and less frequent. Listened to the clock as it ticked on the wall, the seconds going by one after the other in a blur. Then the lights were turned out, but she still didn’t move. She had to be sure. She couldn’t risk anyone seeing her.

She waited until it was nearly two o’clock in the morning before leaving her office. She hadn’t eaten or slept all day, but she was neither hungry nor tired. The CDC was empty and as silent as a tomb, and the only sounds were the heels of her shoes clicking against the linoleum as she walked.

When she reached the observation wing she punched in her code. The hall, like the rest of the building, was quiet. It had been so long since she’d come here that she’d almost forgotten how the faint scent of death clung to the air no matter how hard they tried to eliminate it. Tonight was no different, and under the smell of bleach she could just detect the odor of decay.

She passed the cell that held James, purposefully keeping her eyes straight ahead as she did, then the others. The rooms, like the hall, were dark, but there was movement in a few. Zombies who were in various stages of decay, men who had recently been injected. Even though she hadn’t been here in a year, not since she’d brought the girl to see Angus on her last birthday, Dr. Helton knew who or what was in every single room thanks to the daily reports she received.

She also knew where Test Subject 06 had been put, and that was where she was headed now. Unlike the others, this room wasn’t pitch black, and she was relieved to realize once she got closer that someone had had the forethought to put a nightlight in the girl’s room. When Dr. Helton reached the window, she stopped. It was furnished in a similar manner to Angus’s cell—bed, table, chair, and couch—only there were also a few toys spread around, and Test Subject 06 was curled up on the bed, sound asleep. The blanket was pulled up and tucked under her chin. Her little face was lax and angelic in sleep, and the girl seemed practically unmarred by the pain that had already been inflicted on her.

Dr. Helton knew that wasn’t true, though. She knew the girl had nightmares, had personally witnessed the tears and pain she’d had to endure. The doctor could actually hear the girl’s screams when she closed her eyes at night. They haunted her, and she knew she deserved it for what she had done not only to this little girl, but to her father and the whole world before it.

She wanted to go in and hug the child, but she knew she couldn’t. Not now. Instead, she headed down the hall to Angus’s cell and punched in the code.

The door popped open and she slid inside, knowing that the man in this room might kill her, but not really caring too much if it happened. She had to see him. Had to tell him that she was sorry and that she wanted to make this right. She needed to work out a plan to not only save the girl, but Angus as well.

Maybe, if she were lucky, she would save her soul in the process.

She didn’t undress this time when she slid into his bed, and the tears started before she’d even had a chance to shake him awake. He stirred and grumbled, but it took him only a moment to register what was happening.

“Fuck,” he growled. Then he was on her, his hands around her throat and his grip tight. “What’d you do? What’d you do?”

She could barely register the anguish in his voice because the ache in her throat was spreading to her chest as her need for air grew. Her lips moved, but she couldn’t say anything. She clawed at his hands even though she knew she deserved this. She couldn’t stop herself. It was instinct. Life was instinct.

The darkness in the room grew in intensity, spreading across her vision as a weightless feeling spread through her body. Her temples throbbed, her throat burned and her lungs felt ready to explode. It was the end and she knew it. She welcomed it.

She came back suddenly, gasping. Her lungs ached and every breath she sucked in hurt. Blood pounded in her ears and when she tried to sit up, the room tilted. Angus was sobbing into his hands, sitting on the floor next to the bed. Had he meant to let her live? Had he thought she was dead?

“Angus,” she said, sliding down so she was next to him.

Her own tears were just as violent and bitter as his, but she knew she had no right to the feeling. He was the victim. Her victim. She was a monster even worse than the dead and she would burn in hell for what she had done.

“What are they gonna do to her?” he asked, his voice thick with anguish.

“You know. Don’t make me say it.”

“Why are you here? Did you come to gloat, ‘cause you don’t gotta do that. I’m already broken. You already broke me.”

“No.” Sobs shook her body as she wrapped her arms around him. She wanted him to hold her, to kiss her. She wanted to be someone else and she wanted Angus to be someone else with her. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what I’ve done to you, for what I did to her. I hate myself.”

“You should.”

“I know. I know.”

She cried harder, unable to get any other words out, and then Angus had his arms around her and they were crying together. It went on like that for what seemed like hours, the two of them sobbing until there were no tears left.

Angus pulled back first, wiping his face with the back of his hands. “I don’t wanna live. Not anymore.”

“Don’t say that.” She grabbed his hands but he jerked them away. “That’s why I came. I want to get you out. I want to get her out. I know I don’t deserve your trust or your forgiveness, but believe me when I say that I will do anything to make sure she doesn’t live here for the rest of her life.”

“Why? Why, after all these years, did you suddenly decide this was wrong?”

She sucked in a deep breath, and when she exhaled, the words came out with the air. “I love you.”

Angus laughed. “You don’t know how to love.”

“I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s true. I watched you with her year after year, and it changed me.”

“Not enough.” He stood, nearly pushing her away in the process.

“I know.”

Angus started pacing, but Dr. Helton didn’t move from where she was sitting on the floor. Even though she had known it was futile, she’d been hoping that he’d take her in his arms when she told him that she loved him, and the disappointment of reality was almost as painful as the knowledge of what their daughter was going through.

“How you gonna do it? How you gonna get us out?”

“I don’t know. I’ll need help, I’m just not sure what to do or who to go to.”

“Helen.” Angus stopped and turned to face the doctor. “I saw that nurse today, the one who raised our girl.” He winced like admitting that Dr. Helton had had any part in making the child hurt him. “She was raising some hell. She’ll help.”

Yes, Helen would definitely be an ally, assuming Dr. Helton could get her to listen. That would be the hard part, though. Like Angus, Helen hated her right now. Blamed her for what had happened with the child, and rightfully so.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

“You do that.” Angus threw himself onto the couch and let out a sigh. “Don’t suppose you can bring her down here to see me?”

“Not tonight. It’s too risky.” It was a lie and she felt bad about it. He deserved this, deserved to see his daughter, but she wanted time with him. Alone. “In a couple days. After things have died down.”

Angus sighed, but he seemed to buy her explanation.

Silence fell over them and eventually Dr. Helton dragged herself to her feet and went over to sit at his side. When she put her hand on his knee, he stiffened, but she didn’t let it stop her. She needed this, and she had a feeling he did as well.

She leaned closer and pressed her lips against his. Angus pulled back, but she grabbed his face and tried again. This time, he barely resisted, and when she reached for the drawstring on his pants, he only shifted away a little.

“It’s been seven years, Angus,” she said as she grasped the string between her fingers and pulled. “I know you want this.”

“Not with you,” he said, but his body betrayed him when she slid her hand into his pants and found him already hard.

She didn’t bother arguing, but instead went to work on him. She moved her hand as she kissed him, shifting so she could straddle him, never missing a beat. He groaned and his hands found the hem of her shirt, and then slid under to cup her breasts. He’d given in. She’d known he would.

The first time was fast and over too quickly, and afterward Angus barely said a word. Dr. Helton didn’t leave, though, but instead curled up next to him on the couch, enjoying the warmth of his naked body next to hers. It didn’t take long before the gentle stroke of her hand up and down his chest moved lower, though, and then they were at it again.

Angus gave more of himself to her the second time around. Kissing her more passionately, then carrying her to the bed so they had more room. The seven years that had passed since they’d last been together had changed them both, made them both softer. Rounder. Time did that, but it had also made the doctor appreciate it more. Made her understand more than ever what it meant to be close to another person.

This time when they were finished, Angus put his arm around her and she rested her head on his chest. She closed her eyes and exhaled, suddenly feeling like she was home.

“Don’t know what you did to me, doctor, but you did something.”

“Jane,” she said, twisting so she could look him in the eye. “Please, call me Jane.”

Angus gave her a small smile, and in that look, she knew that if they could get out of this, they would be okay. “Jane.”

That night Helen went to the entertainment district, a bar called Dragon’s Lair that featured fights between the owner and zombies. It had been years since she’d gone out, too busy raising Baby to drink or party, but now it was all she could think about. She stayed until they closed, and then went home with a man who reeked of body odor and lived in a shack that was little more than a mattress thrown on the ground. The next day she did the same thing with a different man, and day three found her having sex in an alley after shooting up some unnamed drug, and then dragging herself back to Dragon’s.

The owner, Dragon himself, was behind the bar that night. He was shirtless and built like a tank with skin so dark it made Helen feel ghostly in comparison. His smooth head glistened under the bar lights and the tattoo of a dragon that took up most of his back made him look rough, but the smile he gave her was friendly and welcoming, as was the gleam in his eye.

“Three days in a row,” he said as he filled her glass. “You trying to drink yourself to death?”

“Doesn’t seem to be anything else to do these days.” Helen threw the shot back, and then slid the glass across the bar so he could refill it. “Plus, I’ve tried living and it hurts like hell.”

Dragon narrowed his eyes on her as he refilled her glass. “We’re just starting over. Things will get better.”

“Nothing—” She swallowed her second shot. “—will ever be better. Trust me.”

Dragon chuckled as he walked away, like he thought she was being overly dramatic, and Helen had the sudden urge to stand on the bar and spill the beans. She could tell these people so much, not just about Star and his part in all this, but about what they were really doing in the CDC. She’d drop the bomb that Angus James was still alive, too. That would blow the whole thing apart. She could almost imagine the members of The Church storming the CDC and ripping it apart stone by stone in much the same way that the Bastille had been torn apart during the French Revolution.

She didn’t, although she did get up and storm across the room after Dragon. The man was headed down a dark and stinking hall when she caught up with him. She grabbed his arm and forced him to spin around, so out of it from the drugs and alcohol that it never even occurred to her for a second that this man could rip her apart the same way he had the zombies in the ring only a half an hour earlier.

“Don’t you laugh at me and walk away,” she’d screamed. “You have no idea what I’ve been through.”

“I know what the whole world has been through,” he said, trying to pull out of her grasp.

Either it was half-hearted or she was holding him harder than she realized, because she managed to maintain her grip on him. “You know nothing,” she said, leaning closer and allowing the words to hiss through her teeth. “But I know. I know everything that goes on in the CDC, all the dark secrets. Secrets that would make your head spin. The lies. The deceit. I know it all.”

Dragon narrowed his dark eyes on her. “What are you on?”

Helen’s hand fell away from his arm and she took a step back. “What?”

“You’re on something. What?”

“Nothing.”

Something in his expression made her want to get out of there. He looked suddenly terrifyingly intense, and the longer she looked at him, the more his face morphed and changed, becoming distorted until he looked like something other than a man. He looked like a dragon.

The dragon opened his mouth and Helen flinched away, expecting fire to come out and burn her alive.

“No,” she said, stepping back. “No.”

She turned to run but he had his arms around her waist before she’d made it two steps. She fought and screamed, but he didn’t relent. He carried her down the hall, deeper into the stinking darkness, stopping only long enough to open a door, and then they were going down. It was blacker than night and cold like winter, and she had the sudden fear that hell had frozen over and this man wasn’t a dragon after all, but the devil himself who had come to take her where she belonged.

Helen screamed and fought the whole way across the room. Then another door opened and she was suddenly falling. It seemed to take forever, like it was an endless pit or her body had become suspended in air, but when she finally touched down her landing was soft, and even though it was still dark, she could almost imagine a puff of feathers rising up around her.

“Sleep it off,” Dragon’s voice boomed through the dark room. “We’ll talk in the morning.”

The door shut and Helen scrambled to her feet, feeling her way through the darkness. She hit a wall and ran her hand along it as she walked, searching for the exit. Instead she came to another wall, so she followed that, and then another. She finally found the door on the last wall, but it was locked and sturdy, and no matter how hard she slammed her shoulder against it she couldn’t get it to budge. She made her way back across the cell, once again locating the pile of feathers so she could lie down. They were soft and warm, so she burrowed into them and allowed herself to sleep.

It was no longer dark when she woke and her head was clear. She realized that the pile of feathers had actually been a bed and that what she’d thought was a cell was only a room. A cozy room, too. There was a big bed and plush chairs, one of which Dragon was currently lounging in, watching her with calculating eyes.

“So what were you on?” he asked.

“Don’t know.” She felt like a child when she shrugged, but she couldn’t muster any of the moxie she’d felt last night when she’d charged after Dragon.

“You shouldn’t take something if you don’t know what it is. Hell, these days, you shouldn’t take anything you can get on the streets. Some of that stuff will knock you dead in seconds flat. Some of it will just drive you insane.”

“I’m not hoping to prolong my life,” she said, sitting up so she could get a better look at him. “Why did you bring me here?”

“You were pretty out of it. Running your mouth off about things that would get you killed pretty fast.”

Helen’s blood turned to ice. What had she said? She couldn’t remember. She couldn’t remember much of anything except that she had felt like she was falling at one point, and there had been another moment when she had been sure that this man was an actual dragon who was dragging her down to hell.

“I was high. Whatever I said, it isn’t true.”

Dragon shrugged. “If you say so.”

It was pretty obvious by his tone that he didn’t believe her, but Helen wasn’t about to ask questions. She’d spent most of her time in this settlement inside the CDC, so she had no idea what Star was doing with the rest of Atlanta, but she wouldn’t put it past him to have spies everywhere. For all she knew, Dragon was trying to trap her.

He stood after a moment and nodded toward the door. “Come on. I’ll get you some breakfast.”

She followed him out of the room on legs that were shaky and sore, only to discover that the rest of the place was as nice as the bedroom had been. It didn’t make any sense how she’d gotten here, though. As far as she could remember, Dragon hadn’t taken her out of the bar.

“Where are we?” she asked, stopping in the middle of the kitchen.

“My apartment.” Dragon opened the fridge and pulled out a basket of eggs. “It’s under the bar.”

Helen had been pretty out of it ever since leaving the CDC, but she could remember the bar fairly well and this pristine apartment was the exact opposite of the grimy atmosphere of the upstairs.

She sank into a chair while Dragon went to work, scrambling eggs and chopping up a couple bell peppers. He looked her way from time to time, but remained silent, giving her a chance to take him in.

He was attractive, which was something she hadn’t noticed upstairs in the dimly lit bar. His skin was a color that reminded her of fertile soil, and his eyes just a shade lighter. Despite the scars on his arms and a couple on his neck, and the fact that he was missing his two front teeth, Dragon came across as soft and gentle, and the quiet concern in his gaze was impossible to miss.

When the eggs were done he set a plate in front of her and took the other chair, nodding in an encouraging way. “Eat.”

“What about you?” she asked when she picked up the fork.

“I already ate. Had to be up early so I could get the zombies for tonight’s fight.”

He watched her while she ate, his brown eyes taking every inch of her in. Under his gaze, Helen felt more like her old self. Like the person she’d been before Baby had come into her life and before she’d met Star, before the zombie virus had wiped everything out. Back then she’d been a woman who had enjoyed the company of a man, had loved to dress up and have fun, and savored the longing looks men would give her when she wore tight clothes.

She didn’t look much like that woman anymore. It had been nine years but she had aged twenty, aided by the long hours of a single parent life and her increasing dependence on cigarettes. The unlimited supply she’d had at the CDC had done a number on her skin, and the stress hadn’t helped. She’d long ago given up trying to maintain her hair, cutting it off so it was only two inches long. She didn’t have makeup or nice clothes, and after three days of slumming it she felt like a homeless person.

“What are you looking at?” she asked when Dragon wouldn’t stop staring.

“You.” He sat forward. “You interest me.”

Helen felt like she was the least interesting person in the world, but for some reason, knowing that Dragon thought that made her feel good.

After she ate she showered and changed into clean clothes. The fact that Dragon just happened to have some in her size lying around didn’t escape her notice, but she was too grateful for them to question where they had come from. When she was dressed she went upstairs, once again shocked by how filthy the place was compared to the basement.

Dragon was behind the bar, getting ready for the night ahead. At his side was a young woman with dark hair and a friendly smile, and Helen remembered her from the three previous nights before.

“You feeling better today?” the woman asked.

She was probably in her mid-twenties, and both her arms were covered in tattoos and she had several piercings in her face, including her nose and two in her eyebrow. Her pale skin contrasted nicely with her black hair and the red lipstick she wore was an added touch that Helen was sure made her stand out in a crowd. Something she needed if she wanted to get tips in a place like this.

“Much better.” Helen slipped onto a stool. “I’m Helen.”

“Eve,” the girl said, extending her hand. “Nice to meet you, Helen.”

Eve seemed genuine, which meant she and Dragon probably weren’t an item, and she had no problem heading off to busy herself somewhere else when her boss cleared his throat.

Once they were alone, Dragon said, “You’re welcome to stick around for a couple days until you get back on your feet, but I won’t have any drugs in my apartment. Understand?”

“Why?” Helen asked, unused to people wanting to help her without asking for things in return—like Star.

“Because it’s my place and I don’t like drugs.” Dragon’s eyes clouded over.

“No.” Helen shook her head. “Not that. Why are you helping me?”

“Because we all need help sometimes,” he said.

The genuine light in his eyes when he looked her over said volumes about who this man was. He was kind and caring, and he looked out for people, something that Helen was suddenly grateful for. As painful as it was to think about going back to the CDC, she knew she would eventually do it. She couldn’t stand the thought of leaving Baby there, of never knowing what happened to her or if she was okay, of not being there to stand up for her. She was just a child, only seven years old, and if Helen were gone there would be no one left to look out for her.

“That’s fine,” she said. “I won’t be doing any more drugs.”

Dragon nodded in response, but she could tell by the flicker in his eyes that he was surprised by the change in her attitude.

Helen stayed with Dragon. Days turned into a week and she began to feel at home. She worked with Eve, serving drinks at night while Dragon fought the zombies, and then retiring with him to his basement apartment. At first their relationship was platonic, but it didn’t take long before Helen found herself longing for something more. It had been seven years since she’d been with a man—other than the ones she barely remembered from her first few drunken nights outside the CDC—and she had never met anyone like the one she found herself with now. He was masculine and strong, yet so good that he didn’t seem real. He cared about people enough to drag her to this basement and save her from herself, and he’d shown her more consideration than anyone had since the zombies showed up.

On her seventh night with him, after they had cleaned up and closed the bar for the night, Helen found it impossible to hold back. She went to him when he was in the shower, slipping her clothes off and stepping in under the hot stream as if he’d invited her there. Dragon’s dark eyes studied her when he turned, taking her in and setting her body on fire with the intense look. He didn’t speak, didn’t try to talk her out of it. It was as if he’d expected it all along and had just been waiting for her to make up her mind.

They had sex in the shower before moving to the bedroom where Dragon laid her out on the bed and explored every inch of her body. He was so thorough that she felt certain he had touched her soul, and later that night as she laid next to him, listening to his heavy breathing echo off the walls of his basement bedroom, she realized with certainty that she had found her place in this world.

But she missed Baby, and she knew she would soon have to return to the CDC.

“What is it?” Dragon asked, running his hand down the side of her face to wipe away the tears that had escaped from her eyes. “Tell me.”

Helen hadn’t even known he’d awakened, and it was so dark that she had no idea how he knew she was crying, but in that moment she was glad he was there.

She turned to him and pressed her face against his bare chest. Dragon’s strong arms encircled her like he was trying to hold her together, and she gave in to the ache inside her and allowed the tears to come.

He held her until she stopped crying, and then in the darkness of the room she told him everything she’d done and seen and heard inside the CDC, how there was a child there that had been her daughter even if they hadn’t been biologically related. How the CDC was pulling all the strings, with Star at the top and everyone doing his bidding like they were puppets in a show. How Angus James was alive and being held prisoner while his family was being lied to.

Dragon didn’t say a word until she had finished, and then he let out a deep breath. “She was right.”

“Who?” Helen asked, looking up at his face even though it was dark and she couldn’t see him that well.

“Amira.” He told her about the deaf girl who had worked for him and how she’d died, how it had been made to look like a random attack, but how there had been too many questions surrounding the whole thing for him to accept it. “I thought they were just stupid rumors. Even after she died, but now I know she was right.”

“I can’t stand the thought of Baby being in there,” Helen said.

“Then we’ll get her out.” Dragon tightened his hold on her. “We’ll do whatever it takes.”

“How?” she asked, knowing that the idea of getting anyone out of the CDC would be impossible, but praying that Dragon would find a way.

“I don’t know,” he said, “but there must be a way. You’ll have to go back. You’ll have to keep your eyes and ears open and look for any weaknesses. There must be someone else who can help. Not everyone in that building is without conscious. Someone will slip.”

Helen nodded. Even though she wasn’t sure it was possible, she knew she wouldn’t be able to go on with life and never look back. If it took a hundred years and she had to sacrifice her very soul, Helen would get Baby out of there.

No one had seen Helen in days.

After talking to Angus, Jane had gone about her business at the CDC like nothing was different, making mental notes in the process about who she might be able to trust or how they might be able to get Angus and his daughter out. Helen was number one on her list, but she’d been MIA since the child was taken from her, and Jane didn’t have the first clue where to look for the woman.

So she waited and planned. At night she went to the observation wing where she would alternate between getting the child before she went to Angus, and going to see him alone. Sex turned into lovemaking, it was the only way she could possibly describe what they were doing, and she knew that Angus felt it too even though he hadn’t said the words out loud. He never tried to resist and more often than not initiated the act, dragging it out during the night like he couldn’t stand the thought of her leaving. Afterward, as they held each other, he would talk to her about his family. His brother and Vivian, and the other people he had come to Atlanta with, and she would fill him in on what they had been doing.

It was in those moments that she hated herself the most. The times when his voice would nearly break with the pain of all the years he had lost, or she would feel a tear drop onto her head. He put on a brave face, but he was hurting more than she had even imagined. More than most people would be able to endure.

Two weeks after the child was taken from her, Helen finally reappeared at the CDC. She came in hesitantly, as if she were afraid that she had lost her job during her absence, but Jane had prepared for this moment. She’d already spoken to Star about Helen, had told him that it was natural for the woman to react this way. That she’d raised the girl for seven years and had bonded with her, and if she hadn’t behaved like this it would have raised a red flag about who she was. Star had a son of his own and understood how paternal instincts could make things fuzzy, so he’d agreed that the woman deserved a second chance if and when she returned.

The second Helen set foot in the CDC, Jane was contacted. She met the nurse at the door, working hard to keep her cold, emotionless exterior intact despite the excitement buzzing through her at finally being able to move forward.

“Helen,” she’d said, motioning toward the hall that led to her office. “You and I need to have a talk.”

Helen had nodded and followed Jane silently, her eyes down like she was afraid she was on the way to a firing squad. Not yet, although Jane had no doubt that Star would rustle one up if he ever got wind of what she was planning.

Once they were safely in her office and the door was shut, Jane felt more at ease. Star had dozens of offices and homes all over the city bugged, but she knew she was safe. He trusted her more than he trusted anyone else, and she knew that if he had been keeping tabs on her, he would know by now that her relationship with Angus had crossed a line years ago. The fact that he had done nothing told her she was in the clear.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been into work,” Helen said when Jane had taken a seat behind her desk.

The doctor said nothing. Helen wasn’t in trouble, at least not with her, but she was curious about where the woman had been. She’d spent every night inside the CDC since being brought here by Star and hadn’t been out of the building in years, so she had no friends, nowhere to sleep, and no one to go to. But even Star hadn’t been able to locate her in the city, and he had eyes everywhere.

“I needed some time.”

“I understand,” Jane said, keeping her tone neutral.

Helen looked up and narrowed her eyes, obviously noticing a change in the woman in front of her. “Do I still have a position here?”

“That depends,” she lied.

“On?”

“On what you’ve been doing for the last two weeks.”

“I told you. I needed time.”

“But where were you? Helen, you and I both know what’s going on inside these walls, so let’s not beat around the bush. Star is concerned that you’re a security risk, so we need to know exactly where you’ve been.”

Helen took a deep breath. “Here and there. Sleeping with men so I had a place to crash. Drinking to forget.”

“And drugs?”

“Yes.”

“We’ll need to get you tested.”

Helen nodded.

“That’s it? Nothing else you want to tell me?”

“No.” She looked down. “I met a man. I’m going to live with him from now on. I’ll still work my job during the day, but go to his place at night. I can’t stand being here. Not anymore.”

She wasn’t lying, but she wasn’t telling the whole truth either. As far as Jane was concerned, though, it only confirmed that she could trust this woman.

Jane studied Helen for nearly a minute before saying, “I don’t believe you, but I hope you can believe me when I tell you that I need your help. I want to get Angus and Test Subject 06 out of here.”

Helen’s head shot up. “What?”

“I want to save them.”

The other woman looked around like she was afraid it was a trap. “I don’t understand.”

“She’s my daughter and I can’t watch her get tortured like this. I tried to ignore it, but I can’t. And I can’t ignore the fact that I’m in love with Angus James any longer. I am, and I’ll do whatever it takes, even sacrifice myself, to save him. But I need help.”

“No.” Helen jumped to her feet and shook her head. “This is nuts.”

Her eyes were wild when she stepped away from Jane’s desk. She kept looking around, a terrified expression in her eyes. She thought it was a joke or a trap, and Jane couldn’t blame her. They’d known each other for over nine years now, and she had been nothing but cold to Helen. Why would this woman trust her now? She wouldn’t. Jane had to prove it to her.

“It’s not a joke,” she said, allowing the cold, emotionless expression to return to her face. “More like a test. Star and I wanted to make sure you’re trustworthy still.”

Helen relaxed slightly. “And?”

“The jury is still out. In the meantime, I want you to stay in your apartment. I’ll come get you when we’ve made our decision.”

Helen opened her mouth as if to argue, but shut it quickly and nodded. “Okay.”

It was two o’clock in the morning when Jane arrived at Helen’s, and even though the woman was asleep, rousing her only took a moment. It took much longer, however, to convince Helen to come with her.

The woman was jumpy the whole way to the observation wing, but once the doors were open her attitude changed. It was obvious that Helen was still suspicious by the way she looked at Jane, but it was also clear that she was on a mission. Helen shot past her, hurrying down the hall to the only cell that was lit. The glow that flowed through the window was faint, but it gave off enough light to highlight the tears in her eyes when she stopped in front of it. She pressed her palms flat against the glass and then her cheek, and then she closed her eyes as she cried.

“Let me open the door,” Jane said when she’d stopped at Helen’s side.

The woman’s eyes flew open and she stepped back. “No,” she said, but the hope shimmering in her eyes gave her away.

“It will be okay,” Jane replied.

She typed in the code and the door popped open. Helen didn’t make a move to enter, so Jane went first. The other woman followed when she crossed the room, stayed at her side as she scooped the child up, who only roused a little, and then turned and headed for the door.

“No,” Helen said again, terror ringing in her voice.

“It will be okay,” Jane repeated.

She continued down the hall with Helen right on her heels the entire time. The girl in her arms was small for her age, but heavy in her sleepless state, and Jane couldn’t wait to hand her off.

Helen’s eyes were wide when Jane stopped outside Angus’s cell. She typed in the code and pushed the door open to find her child’s father waiting, his arms already open. When she eased the girl into his embrace, he pulled her tightly against him.

“What’s going on?” Helen asked, following Jane into the room.

“I told you.” She stood up on the tips of her toes so she could kiss Angus on the cheek, hoping the intimacy would make Helen believe her. “I want to save them.”

Helen burst into tears.

She had a plan, but the more she thought about it and the more she tried to work out the details in her head, the less certain she became that she would be able to get Angus and the child out at the same time. It would draw a lot of suspicion. Star might look too closely.

“Save her, then,” Angus whispered in Jane’s ear after she’d confessed her fears to him. “You gotta save her.”

Jane closed her eyes and inhaled slowly. His chest hair tickled her nose, but it was a good feeling. Everything about him felt good. His warmth, his strength, his heart beating against her cheek, his willingness to stay locked away if it meant their daughter could be free. Angus was the only good thing in her life, and leaving him here to rot would be wrong.

“There has to be a way,” she said, her eyes still closed.

His arms tightened around her. “If there is, you’ll figure it out. If there ain’t, you know what you gotta do.”

She did, but thinking about it hurt. She hated to admit it even to herself, but the idea of leaving Angus here even to save their daughter was almost too much to bear. It shouldn’t be that way, Jane knew, but it was. She hadn’t been lying when she’d said she wasn’t maternal, and even now after she’d accepted the fact that she couldn’t stand the thought of allowing their daughter to be tortured, she would still want to save Angus if she had to choose between the two of them. She couldn’t imagine her future without him, couldn’t imagine leaving him here when she knew she could get him out.

It would be unforgiveable, though, and she knew it. Angus loved that little girl more than anything, more than Jane and more than himself. Logically, she knew that was how it should be, but she couldn’t force her heart to make room for the child when Angus had already taken up so much of it.

“I’ll figure out a way,” she said as she snuggled closer to him, knowing that finding a way might mean waiting months, possibly years to get them out.

Her plan was a simple one. So simple that it would be suspicious to anyone who looked too closely at her, but Jane knew no one was watching. She was still doing her job, still allowing the innocent men and women they brought in to be experimented on and tortured. Still helping Star and the other scientists manipulate the virus in hopes of finding the answer that had been eluding them. Still monitoring both Angus and the child even though it pained her every time. She had to if she wanted to keep up appearances, and she had to keep up appearances if she wanted to get them out.

Plus, her plan centered on being an integral part of the team. After her reconciliation with Angus, Jane returned to her duties in the observation wing with Helen at her side. She was once again drawing blood, observing the changes the virus brought to their test subjects, and overseeing the experiments personally. She needed to be hands on so that when the time came, no one would be suspicious of her presence in the cells.

Helen, like Jane, was working on the plan. She was making contacts among the guards, using her feminine wiles to figure out who they might be able to trust. That was the trickiest part. They needed at least one guard on their side if they were going to pull the whole thing off, and they knew that most of them would be too scared to even think about crossing Star.

Helen got lucky only six months after returning to the CDC. She’d started inviting the guards out to Dragon’s, getting them drunk in hopes that the booze would loosen their tongues. That’s how she discovered that one guard, Austin, had a bone to pick with Star. The man, who was only in his early thirties, had at one time had a wife and twin baby girls. They were three months old when the virus broke out, and he watched first his daughters and then his wife suffer horrible deaths only to come back. He’d had to fight the woman he’d loved off before smashing her head in, and then he’d had to stab his little babies, so young and innocent, through the heads.

He still had nightmares about it, he’d said. Still woke up crying even after all these years. He’d gone to work in the CDC because he wanted to be in on the creation of the vaccine, and with no medical training, being muscle for Star was the only thing he could do.

Helen told Jane all about the conversation, about how the man had wept in the middle of Dragon’s bar, screaming about what he’d do if he ever got his hands on the person responsible. The women had agreed that this man would be the perfect ally, and it had only taken one promise from Dr. Helton to get him to agree to help. The promise that he would get a front row seat to Star’s death.

Once they had their man, Jane had to bide her time and wait, praying that an opportunity would present itself and she would be able to smuggle both the man she loved and their daughter out of the CDC.

Three years passed before the opportunity finally presented itself, and when it finally did Jane was a mess. That morning, she did her best to appear as cool and collected as she usually was, but it wasn’t easy, especially since she hadn’t been able to see Angus for the last several nights and he had no idea what was going on. Things had been too busy and she had known that going to him would have been too risky, but she was dying to tell him. Dying to let him know that soon he would be free.

They’d had a breakthrough. Four days earlier Star had called her into the lab and announced that he thought he’d finally done it, that he was sure he’d found the answer he’d been looking for and that they would soon have the virus they’d been trying to create.

He had been giddy in a way she’d never seen him before, and so had she, only her reason went much deeper than his. This was the moment she had been waiting for if she wanted to get both the child and Angus out alive. She’d needed something big to happen. A change in the virus that was so huge it wouldn’t look suspicious if both their test subjects died from it. This was her moment.

For the past three days, the team had worked day and night. They’d barely slept, barely eaten. They were living on coffee and power naps, but they were almost ready, and so was Jane.

The syringes in her pocket felt like they weighed a hundred pounds as she followed Star down the hall. He was grinning like a fool, but so was she, and together they looked like two mad scientists as they stepped through the door and into the observation wing.

The team was in place and they watched from the other side of the glass as guards entered Angus’s room and restrained him. Jane held her breath and followed Star into her lover’s cell. Angus’s face was red from exertion, his eyes wide and bloodshot. His gaze met hers and she prayed that he would receive the silent message she was trying to send to him. That he’d understand this was the moment they’d been waiting for.

Angus winced when the needle was inserted into a vein on his neck. Star pushed the plunger and the virus entered Angus’s bloodstream. Jane had to work hard at maintaining her composure when he gritted his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut.

When the syringe was empty, Star stepped back and stared down at Angus. “Let him up, but watch him.”

The guards did as they were told, releasing him but not leaving his side.

Angus grunted as he dragged himself to his feet, his eyes still closed and an expression of pain on his face.

“How do you feel?” Star asked.

“Fuckin’ great.” Angus rubbed the spot where the needle had pricked his skin, then ran his hand down his shoulder to his arm. He clenched his hand into a fist and then released it a second later, wincing like every movement hurt.

“Tell me,” Star hissed.

Angus finally opened his eyes, but he didn’t look at Star. He looked right at Jane. “Feels like it’s burnin’ its way through me. Like my blood’s on fire.” He swallowed as if finding words difficult. “You gonna inject her with this shit too? You gonna torture her like that?”

“Of course,” Star scoffed. “You’re both immune, but your blood’s reaction to the virus is totally different than hers. We need to know how she handles it.”

Angus puckered his lips, his gray eyes focused on Jane. “Don’t. She could die.”

“She won’t die,” she said, hoping he would read between the lines and know that their daughter not only wouldn’t die, but that tomorrow they would both wake up free.

“Test Subject 06 has proven to be very resilient. She’ll be fine.” Star turned his back to Angus and headed for the door.

Jane took the opportunity to give him a nod before following Star into the hall. She hoped Angus understood what was coming, hoped he didn’t think that she’d abandoned him.

The child was ten now, but still small and weak, and even though she fought, only one guard was needed to restrain her. The girl looked up at Jane, her gray eyes full of silent accusations as the guard held her down and Star repeated the process of injecting her with the virus. When it burned its way through her veins, she cried and asked why, making it almost impossible for Jane to maintain her expression of indifference. When Star asked the girl how she was feeling, she cried even harder and Jane felt her heart crack. She almost lost it at that point, but somehow, against all odds, she managed to hold it together as she followed Star out of the cell.

In the hall they stopped just on the other side of the window. Jane couldn’t look through, knowing that her daughter was in pain and that she might not be able to hold onto her composure if she saw it, but Star had no such reservations about watching the girl suffer.

“I want blood drawn in exactly three hours, but until then I’m counting on you to keep a close eye on the subjects,” he said, his tone so cold it sent a shiver shooting through Jane. “I have a meeting that I simply cannot miss, but I want around the clock observation. Do you understand?”

“Of course,” she said. “You can count on me.”

Star nodded once before turning his back to the cell and heading down the hall, taking the guards with him.

Once she was alone, Jane let out a deep breath and followed the path Star had just taken; only she didn’t leave the hall, but instead stopped outside Angus’s cell. He was already at the window, glaring at her, and she knew he’d watched them go into their daughter’s cell.

She wanted to go to him. To kiss him, to wrap him in her embrace and tell him how sorry she was, but she knew Star was recording this. He always turned the cameras on after an injection, just in case something major happened, and going in right now would be too risky.

But there was no audio recording in the cells, so she didn’t hesitate to push the button on the wall.

“How could you?” Angus asked a split second after the intercom was on.

“The pain will end soon. I promise.”

Three hours, that’s how long she had to wait. Then she would have an excuse to go into the cells, and after she drew their blood she would inject both test subjects with the drug, ending their time inside this hell once and for all.

She’d developed the drug herself after deciding to break Angus and the child out. It had taken her over a year to get it right, and then she’d had to test it. She’d injected a rat first, monitoring the animal closely as its heart slowed to the point where it was barely detectable. The rat was out for five hours before waking, and she’d monitored it over the next couple days to be sure there had been no adverse effects before moving onto a bigger animal, which had been out even longer. She’d tested it on a rabbit, and then a dog, and then finally a human. The last one had been tricky to pull off, but she’d managed to get the drug into a brand new test subject while no one was looking. Just like the animals, the man’s heart had slowed to almost nothing for close to five hours and he had awakened healthy, if not a little bit groggy.

Angus watched her through the glass now, neither one of them saying a word even though the intercom was still on. He was trying to get a read on her, she knew, and she hoped that he would understand all the things she dared not say out loud.

“I’ll be drawing blood in three hours,” she said. “On both of you.”

Angus nodded and Jane noted the subtle way his shoulders relaxed. He was still rubbing his neck like the burning hadn’t yet gone away, but otherwise he looked calm. At peace even.

The following hour went slowly. Jane alternated between the two cells, writing down any changes in the patients so Star wouldn’t be able to question her work at all. This was a particularly nasty strain and it hurt Jane to see how much pain her family was in, but intellectually she knew the side effects would help convince Star that the virus had killed them both, and she tried to cling to that.

As the second hour approached, she became increasingly anxious. Angus was curled up on the bed, his hands fisted and his eyes closed, and watching him suffer was nearly killing her. Different strains of the virus had caused him pain in the past, but nothing like this. She’d never seen Angus writhe so much. Never seen him look like he was on the verge of losing control the way he was now.

The girl wasn’t much different, only she was curled up on the floor of her cell. Her face was streaked with tears that seemed to have no end, and her body was so rigid that if it weren’t for the constant writhing, Jane would have thought she was already dead and had gone into rigor mortis.

But the pain seemed to ease after that. Angus was the first to relax, slowly uncurling from the fetal position to stretch out on the bed, and then finally getting to his feet so he could move around. It took the girl slightly longer, but by the time the third hour was approaching, she too was up. Unlike her father, she didn’t pace the room, but instead sat on the edge of her bed and stared at the floor like she was hoping it would open up and swallow her.

Jane watched the girl from the other side of the glass, trying to put names to the feelings inside her. The thing she felt for Angus was simple to classify, but this was something different. She had no real bond with the child, but they were blood and that meant something, and seeing her in pain had hurt Jane. She now knew with certainty that she would never be able to stand idly by and watch the torture continue, but her desire to save the child had a lot more to do with Angus than the girl herself. Doing this would mean that he could live in peace. Inside these walls or outside them, as long as his daughter was free, Angus would suffer less. That was enough to make Jane want to save the child, despite her uncertain feelings.

She found herself standing in front of the girl’s cell when the third hour finally approached. Her hands were shaking as she typed in her code, and the syringe was out before the door had even opened. The girl looked up when Jane walked in, and the sadness in her eyes was almost enough to stop the doctor in her tracks. She kept moving, though, knowing that she had to get this done before Star returned.

“I need to draw blood,” she said when she knelt in front of the child. “Then I’m going to give you a drug that will make you sleep, and when you wake up, you will be free.”

The girl said nothing as she watched Jane prepare the syringe. At ten she was already a pro at having her blood drawn, and she barely even winced when the needle was inserted into her vein. Jane released the tourniquet and red liquid splashed into the vial. As it filled, her gaze moved over the girl in front of her, noting the scars that dotted the crooks of her arms. She looked like an addict. Like she’d spent years shooting up to escape reality when in truth, she had spent years being poked and prodded with no chance of escape.

How could Jane have done this? Where had her life gone so wrong that she’d thought this was okay? Even if the girl sitting in front of her wasn’t her flesh and blood, she was just a child and she’d had the last three years of her life stolen from her. She’d been ripped from the only loving parent she’d ever known, had her biological father dangled in front of her and then torn away year after year, had spent all her life locked away in this building, and had endured more pain than any one person deserved. Jane had done this. She was the one responsible for all this child’s suffering.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered as the final vial filled.

The girl tilted her head, her gray eyes, so much like her father’s, narrowed on the woman in front of her. Jane had visited the girl every year on her birthday but she’d never told her who she was. Had never said the words out loud to anyone but Helen.

“I should have watched out for you. I shouldn’t have let this happen.” She sealed the last vial and set it aside, then removed the cap from the syringe that was clutched in her hand. “I’m going to make it better, I promise.”

The girl didn’t say a word as the needle slid into her vein.

Once it was in, Jane looked up, focusing on the child’s bright, gray eyes as she pushed down on the plunger, injecting the drug into her body. “I’m your mother, and I’m going to make sure you are safe from here on out.”

The girl’s eyes grew wide, but the drug worked fast. Within seconds, they began to droop. She blinked once, twice, three times, but her eyes wouldn’t stay open. Her lips moved like she wanted to say something, but nothing happened, and then she dropped to the bed. She managed to crack her eyes open just enough to look at Jane again, then she slid her hand across the bed, her fingers twitching like she was having to work extra hard to get her body to obey. Then her hand was on Jane’s, clutching it. The girl’s grip was weak, but persistent, up until the second she lost her battle with consciousness.

Tears filled Jane’s eyes as she stared at the girl. Her face was so calm and peaceful, so angelic. Then, right in front of Jane’s eyes, the color began to fade from her cheeks. Her skin went from pink and full of life to a shade only slightly brighter than white. Her fingers, still tangled with Jane’s, cooled.

The drug had done its trick.

The doctor got to her feet, knowing that she needed to get moving so she could inject Angus with the drug as well, and she had just picked up the empty syringe when the door opened behind her.

“How’s she doing?” a voice boomed through the room.

Jane’s heart nearly exploded as she spun around to face Star. She knew her expression gave her away, but she was too shocked by his sudden appearance to compose herself. Too taken surprised to do anything but stare at him with her mouth hanging open.

He stood frozen in the doorway as he took everything in, his gaze going from the terrified look on the doctor’s face, to the bed at her side, lingering on the girl’s lifeless body before going back to Jane. He stayed where he was until he spotted the syringe in her hand. Then he was on the move, charging across the room with an expression on his face that was a mixture of confusion and fury.

“What have you done?” he asked, ripping the syringe from her hand. “What have you done!”

His voice boomed through the room, bouncing off the walls and echoing in Jane’s ears. She recoiled from him but it wasn’t necessary, because Star was already sitting on the edge of the bed. Already checking the girl’s pulse. He tried her neck and then her wrist, and then, in what looked to Jane like a moment of desperation, pressed his ear against her chest.

She held her breath, praying that the drug worked the way she wanted it to. A few seconds later Star stood and turned to face Jane, and she knew it had because his gaze wasn’t focused on her, it was on the empty syringe in his hand.

“What did you give her?” he asked, his voice shaking but more controlled than Jane had expected it to be.

“I gave her a lethal dose of morphine,” she lied, not bothering to hide the tremor in her voice.

She was scared. Terrified. She’d known Star for a long time and she knew what he was capable of. She’d never been on the receiving end of his fury before, but she couldn’t stop her brain from playing out the dozens of possible scenarios that awaited her, each one more horrifying than the last. Even worse was the knowledge that she wouldn’t be able to rescue Angus now. Star would have her killed, probably in some horrifying way, and then she’d be gone and Angus would be stuck here. Forever.

She had failed him.

Star lifted his head so he was looking her in the eye. Jane stood a good five inches taller than him, but at that moment he seemed to tower over her.

“Why would you do this?”

She swallowed, willing her voice to work. “She’s my daughter and I couldn’t watch her suffer anymore. I couldn’t stand the tests. This one was—” Her voice caught in her throat as tears filled her eyes, and she was thankful that the memory of watching the girl suffer was still fresh in her mind. “She was hurting.”

“It was for science,” Star said. “It was your idea.”

“I didn’t know how hard it would be.”

She held her breath, waiting. Physical violence wasn’t Star’s go-to punishment, but she had seen him hit people before and she wouldn’t put it past him. Especially not when she had just killed one of his favorite test subjects.

After a moment of silence, though, Star simply sighed and shook his head. “Women and their sentimentalities. I should have known. I was afraid this would happen after the child was born, but you seemed to be handling it well. I’m honestly surprised it took you ten years.”

Jane exhaled as relief flooded her body. He believed her, but even better, he was going to forgive her. He was going to let her live and eventually, after a little more planning, she’d be able to get Angus out as well. Everything was going to be okay.

“I blame myself,” Star said, tossing the empty syringe to the floor. “This is my fault. You’ve always been reliable, and if I had put a stop to this foolish plan in the beginning this wouldn’t have happened.” He paused and a chill moved through Jane’s body at the cold look in his eyes. “Your input on this team has been invaluable, but you know I can’t let this go unpunished.”

Star snapped his fingers, and for the first time Jane noticed the guards standing at the door.

He had put all of his faith in Jane, had given himself to her, had allowed her to pull him in and make him care even though he knew he should hate her. He’d tried to resist at first, but eventually he’d come to a point where he’d had to admit that she meant something to him, and there was no going back now. No matter what.

The whole thing had made him hate himself at first, but then he’d remember Hadley and Jon.

Back when they were in Vegas looking for supplies, Jon had kidnapped Hadley and Vivian, dragging them to the Monte Carlo where Hadley had been held prisoner and eventually raped. It had all been Jon’s fault for taking her there, but she’d forgiven him, had even fallen in love with him, and they’d been happy together. Probably still would be if zombies hadn’t intervened.

What Jane had done to him was different and so much worse, but she’d promised she would make it right, whispering in his ear night after night, and Angus had believed her. He’d allowed himself to hope, something he hadn’t done for years, had allowed himself to care.

He’d started to doubt her over the last few days, though. She’d come to him almost every night for three years, had brought his daughter to his cell several times a week, had given him the chance to get to know her. That was something he’d never thought he’d be able to do. Then, three nights ago, she hadn’t shown up. When she didn’t come the next night or the night after that, he’d wondered if she’d changed her mind. Then she’d come with Star and had watched while the guards held him down and injected him with yet another strain of the virus, and Angus had wanted to kill her, knowing that she would do the exact same thing to their daughter.

Trust her. That’s what she’d asked him to do. It was a hell of a lot to ask.

Angus had very little trust left inside him. He’d had it sucked from him a little at a time throughout his early years, most of it taken away by a deadbeat dad and an abusive mom. He’d been angry after that and held onto the trust he had left like giving it away would kill him. It had gotten easier, though, after the virus. Who knew that a zombie apocalypse could make your life better? It had for him. Had made him realize that trusting other people could make your life easier.

Here, though, inside the walls of the CDC, that trust had been worn down to almost nothing. The people who worked here weren’t human. They didn’t feel, didn’t care what kind of pain they caused. Didn’t give a shit if the person they were hurting was a man or a woman or a child, good or bad, it was all the same to them. Angus had watched the endless parade of test subjects pass his room. Marched in as human beings who deserved more, then wheeled out on gurneys weeks, sometimes months later. Everyone who’d entered this hall had eventually left in a body bag except him, and now his daughter was here and he was expected to trust the woman responsible for it.

How could he do that?

Love, that was how. She’d said she loved him and even though he wasn’t ready to say it back, he did care about her and that meant he had to trust her. As much as it hurt him to do it.

Only it was taking too long. She’d gone into their daughter’s room to draw blood but hadn’t come back out yet. She should have come out by now. It shouldn’t be taking this long.

He was standing at the window waiting for Jane when the door at the end of the hall opened and Star appeared. Everything in Angus clenched and tightened until his gut was nothing but a ball of worry. Jane was still in the cell and he didn’t know what was going on. What if she hadn’t had time to inject the drug? What if she got caught before she could do it and their daughter ended up stuck here forever? What if she had done it but got caught anyway?

Star passed him, not even glancing his way, then headed to the other cell. Angus pressed his face against the glass hoping to get a better look, but Star disappeared through the door and then there was nothing to see but the guards standing in the hall.

Angus stayed where he was at first, but after a few seconds he found it impossible to stand still. So he paced. Keeping one eye on the window, he traced the perimeter of his room. He’d lived in this prison for more than eleven years and he knew exactly how many steps it took to get from one wall to the other and back again. He counted as he walked, focusing on the numbers instead of what might be happening down the hall. The routine usually calmed him when he felt ready to explode, the counting and the pacing, and right now he needed that more than he had ever needed anything in his entire life.

He was halfway through his second pass when movement caught his eye. He hurried to the window, his heart pounding harder than it ever had before, and found two guards dragging a terrified Jane down the hall. Star, frowning but calm, followed behind them at a safe distance so he didn’t have to get his hands dirty. If there was one thing Angus knew about Star at this point, it was that the man did not like having to get his hands dirty.

Jane’s eyes were big and wide and full of tears, but she didn’t fight. There was fear in her expression, but Angus couldn’t read her well enough to know if she had accomplished what she’d set out to do. Had she done it? Had she been able to inject their daughter with the drug?

Jane looked toward Angus as they drew closer, and when their eyes met she nodded. Relief flooded him, but it was short lived because a second later the guards stopped at the cell across from his, and the second the door was open, Jane was shoved inside.

Star stood outside the cell once the door was sealed shut and stared at the woman who had worked at his side for more that two decades. His expression was thoughtful and slightly deranged, and when he turned away only a minute later, he was smiling.

Angus slammed his palm against the glass, hoping to get the prick’s attention, but all he got was a glare from the guards as they followed Star through the door. When it had shut behind them, Angus turned back to Jane.

She was crying, but she nodded again so he’d know it was done. It didn’t help, though. Not yet. He would be tense and nervous until they came to remove the body. Helen and the guard knew they had around five hours after the injection, but they couldn’t remove the body until they were told to or it would draw unwanted suspicion. Only Jane, who was supposed to give them the signal, was locked away.

The next few hours were the slowest of Angus’s life, and that was saying a lot. He stood at the window, alternating between watching the door and staring at Jane. Like him, she never left the window of her cell; only it seemed to Angus that she rarely took her eyes off him. After an hour she had calmed down and wiped away her tears, but the more time that passed, the more anxious she became. She shifted frequently and chewed on her nails. More and more often she looked away from Angus so she could glance toward their daughter’s cell.

Had the plan gone the way they’d wanted it to, Jane would have been the one in charge of removing the body. She would have been the one to call the guard. Now, though, she was stuck in the cell across from Angus and just as powerless as he’d been for the past eleven years. He found less comfort in the knowledge than he should have.

Finally, the door opened and the people they’d been waiting for entered. The guard never glanced their way as he headed down the hall, pushing the gurney in front of him, but Helen’s steps faltered when she passed Jane. It was impossible to know what the other woman was thinking, but Angus had a strong suspicion that Helen thought Jane was getting what she deserved. Maybe she was right, but it was also possible that she wasn’t. Angus found that he wasn’t sure of anything anymore.

Helen hurried after the guard without even trying to say anything to the doctor she’d once worked for.

Only a few minutes later the two reappeared, and this time the gurney was not empty. The sight of the black body bag did something odd to Angus. Twisted his insides into knots while making his heart leap at the same time. He knew that his daughter was alive and that this was a good thing, but seeing her motionless form encased in the black plastic wasn’t easy. It brought back memories of holding her as an infant, of making her laugh, of seeing her toddle across his cell. It made him remember how she had fit perfectly into his arms as she slept, her little face pressed against his neck. It made him want to kill someone.

But after they had disappeared an odd sense of calm settled over him. She would be safe now, he was sure of it, and even though he would never leave the walls of this building alive, he was satisfied. Not happy, no that would have been too much to ask of someone who was going to miss out on the rest of his child’s life, but he could at least live out the rest of his own life in peace.

Angus met Jane’s gaze and once again found tears making their way down her cheeks, but he didn’t have anything left inside to comfort her with right now. He cared for her, but he hadn’t been able to forgive her completely yet. He was trying. One transgression at a time, slowly working his way through each one, but there were a lot of things to forgive and it was going to take time. Luckily, he had years in front of him to do it.

He turned away from her and headed to his bed where he curled up into a ball once again. Now that the emotional turmoil had faded, the effects of the virus they’d injected him with had become more prevalent. This one had been a whopper, and he could still feel the burn of it in his veins.

Movement in the hall caught his eye when he woke and he was on his feet in seconds, suddenly afraid they had dragged his daughter back to the CDC after discovering that she wasn’t actually dead. There were guards and scientists outside his room, and in the middle of it all stood Star, his back to Angus as he stared into the cell that held Jane.

Jane.

Until now, Angus hadn’t stopped to consider what would happen to her. She’d betrayed Star and there was no way the sadistic bastard would let it go unpunished. What excuse had she given? What lie had she told? It must have been a good one to make him believe that she had killed her own child, but Angus didn’t know what it had been. That was something they had never discussed, mainly because he hadn’t wanted to face the possibility that Jane might fail.

Now though, watching the commotion in the hall, he realized that Jane was in very deep trouble. Even worse, Angus would have a front row seat to her demise.

He slammed his hand against the window and yelled, “Hey! Asshole!”

Star didn’t turn, but that was to be expected. The rooms, after all, were soundproof.

That didn’t stop Angus from hitting the glass. Over and over again he slammed his hand against the window, hoping to get someone’s attention. What he would say or do when he did, he had no clue, he just knew that he had to try and stop whatever was about to happen.

It didn’t work, though. The guards and doctors who were in the cell finished what they were doing and left the room, barely noticing that Angus was slamming his hand against the window. The door was shut and the crowd that had gathered in the hall dispersed slowly until only Star was left. His back was still to Angus and his arms were crossed as he stared into Jane’s cell, but every inch of him looked totally at ease. That was something Angus couldn’t wrap his brain around, how a person could be so at home with their own cruelty. No one would have ever described Angus James as being a kind person before the virus hit, but even he hadn’t reveled in the brutality he’d inflicted on others. In fact, most of the time it had made him hate himself that much more.

When Jane reappeared at the window, her face was streaked with tears and her hair was a mess. Her white lab coat was gone and the shirt she’d been wearing underneath it was torn, and a trickle of blood ran down her arm from where they had injected her.

Angus’s legs gave out and he dropped to the floor as deep inside his chest, his heart ripped in two.

He cried. He cried harder than he ever had, flipping through his life as he sat on the floor, thinking about everyone he had lost. His father who he had never really known, his mother who he had hated more than he’d loved, and everyone he’d known before the virus. None of them had really felt like much of a loss, but the deaths had still chipped away at him a little at a time. Then there had been Emily, Vivian’s girl who’d somehow managed to burrow her way into his heart when he wasn’t looking, Winston who he’d come to think of as a brother, Darla who had been the first woman he’d allowed himself to love, and Jon and Hadley who were like family.

Everyone else on the list could be traced back to his arrival in Atlanta, and as he flipped through their names, he realized that he blamed her for all of it. He blamed Jane. She’d stolen so much from him, but she’d also given him something, something that he never should have been able to have, not here in this prison. She’d given him a child and made the last ten years worth living. She’d taught him to love someone more than he loved himself, and in that moment, sitting on the floor of his cell, Angus forgave her. He forgave her for everything she’d done and for everything she’d put him through, because it had all been worth it if it meant he got to be a father.

Over the last three years she’d told him over and over again that she loved him, but he had never been able to say it back. Had never really been able to embrace it because he’d been hurt and angry, and even though he had every right to be, he knew he would always regret missing this opportunity if he didn’t take it now.

He stood, pulling himself off the ground on shaky legs. Jane was still standing in the same place, her face streaked with tears and her shoulders shaking. Angus pressed his hand against the glass in front of him and she mimicked the gesture.

Her lips moved, the words shaky through the sobs but clear as day. I love you.

“I love you,” he replied, clenching the hand that wasn’t pressed against the glass into a fist. “I love you! I love you! I love you!”

He repeated it so many times that his throat was raw and the words were literally ripping their way out of him, but it felt good and right, and it freed him in a way that nothing else could have.

Jane’s bed was just visible from his window, and over the next few days he watched as she suffered a slow and horrifying death. He had no doubt from the way she writhed that she’d been injected with the most recent strain of the virus, and all he could think about was how painful it had been as it burned its way through his veins. Only for him the majority of the pain had stopped after two hours, his immunity to the virus proving to be too powerful even for the mutated version. Jane, though, suffered for days, curled up on the bed, her mouth open in screams he couldn’t hear but could feel vibrating through his body.

It dragged on and no matter how much it hurt, Angus found it impossible to walk away. He barely slept, refused the food they brought him, and stood until his legs felt like cooked spaghetti noodles.

On the third day, it stopped. It happened so suddenly that he thought he might be seeing things. Jane’s mouth closed and her body relaxed. She opened her eyes and stared up at the ceiling like she didn’t know where she was, and then she sat up. When she turned to face him, he expected to see the blank, milky stare he’d come to associate with the dead, but her expression was calm.

She stood and crossed the room to the window. Her hair was matted and clinging to her scalp, and her shirt was so drenched in sweat that it was practically transparent. She wobbled like her legs barely worked, but she made it to the window without falling and leaned her face against the glass, her eyes on him.

She didn’t say anything, but he could tell from her expression that the end was right around the corner and she knew it. Like her, he leaned his face against the glass, so exhausted he could hardly stand, but unable to tear himself away when the end was so close.

Less than an hour later she collapsed and disappeared from sight. Angus, who was barely keeping it together, screamed her name and banged against the glass. His eyes burned but no tears came, and he knew his body was too dehydrated from his three day vigil to muster up any tears, so instead he howled, allowing the agony to pour out of him in a stream of animalistic sounds.

By the time she reappeared he had worn himself out. Her hand came first, gripping the window’s ledge and using it as leverage so she could pull herself to her feet. The top of her head came into view, her blonde hair more disheveled than he had ever seen it, and then her face. The milky eyes were shockingly alert and focused on him, almost as if she blamed him for her state and wanted nothing more than to rip him apart. He supposed that was true. If she had never had sex with him, she would still be alive.

When she slammed against the glass and opened her mouth in a silent growl, he had to turn away. It was too much, seeing her reduced to this after everything they had been through.

Angus slipped into bed and pulled the sheet up over his head. His stomach was empty and his mouth so dry it felt like the Mojave Desert, but at the moment he needed sleep more than anything else. Not just because he was exhausted, but because he needed to escape the horrifying nightmare his life had become.

The warmth of the sun’s rays drew a smile out of Meg when she stepped out of the building. Summer would be arriving soon, and then her parents would take Margot and her to the pool so they could swim. The government had only opened it last year, and even though it got crowded at times, having something to cool them off in the summer had been a relief.

The other kids from her class left, some with parents and some with friends, but Meg leaned against the wall and waited for Margot. There were only a few kids her age, so she knew them all, but she didn’t talk to anyone. The two girls from her class were weird—they always made a big deal about her Uncle Angus—and none of the boys interested her. Well, almost none. There was one boy who was really cute, but even though she caught him staring at her a lot, Meg wasn’t ready to admit that she liked boys just yet. It made her Daddy too happy when she said they were gross, and there was a part of her that didn’t want that to change. Even if she didn’t think this boy was gross at all.

Jackson Star glanced at her for the hundredth time that day when he walked by, and Meg felt her cheeks heat up. She and Jackson had never had a real conversation, but she had a feeling he wanted to one day. Maybe even soon.

The doors to the school burst open and a line of younger kids filed out. Margot was toward the middle, bouncing on the balls of her feet. When she saw her older sister she waved, swinging her arm over her head so hard that her blonde hair swished around.

“Meg!”

“I can see you.” Meg rolled her eyes.

Margot smiled like she thought her big sister held the answers to all the secrets of life. “It’s hot!”

“It’s warm.” Meg threw her bag over her shoulder and Margot did the same with hers. “Let’s go.”

They walked down the street side by side, Margot hopping along at her sister’s side and chattering like a bird. “Today we painted pictures.” She held her hands up and spread her fingers so Meg could see her palms. They were tinted pink like she’d covered them in red paint but hadn’t been able to get it all off. “I painted our family.”

“I hope you made me pretty,” Meg said.

“Nope. I made you ten feet tall with fangs.” Margot showed her teeth and let out a little hiss.

Meg smiled, but she was eleven years old, which to her meant she was also required to roll her eyes yet again. “Figures.”

“Well, I needed—” Margot stopped mid-sentence and started waving again. “Mommy!”

When Meg put her hand up to block the sun from her eyes, she saw their mom headed down the street. She waved and smiled, and Margot ran off to meet her, but Meg was eleven, not nine, which meant she was much too cool to run down the street to her mom. But, almost against her will, she found her feet moving faster when she saw Margot throw herself into their mother’s arms.

“I can’t wait to see it,” Mom was saying when Meg walked up. “I bet you did a great job.”

“My hands are pink!” Margot held her hands up again and their mom laughed.

“They sure are.”

“What are you doing here?” Meg asked when her mom pulled her in for a hug.

“I didn’t get to see my girls last night, so I wanted to come pick you up from school.”

“Was it a girl or a boy?” Margot asked, just like she always did.

Their mom leaned down like she was telling Margot a secret. “A girl.”

She laughed and clapped, and Meg found herself thinking that Margot looked just like their daddy when she smiled like that, only pretty like a girl. She had Mom’s brown eyes, and probably her hair too, but it was hard to say for sure since Daddy’s was the same blondish color.

Meg was the only one in their family with dark hair, and sometimes it made her mad that she didn’t look like her mom and dad the way Margot did. They weren’t her real parents, but that didn’t stop her from wishing she looked more like them. She knew because she’d asked them about it once, a couple years after Margot had been born. Before that it had never occurred to her that she didn’t look like her parents, but then her sister had come along and Meg had been bombarded with constant comments about how much her younger sister looked like her dad, or how her eyes were the exact same color as her mom’s. When Meg had stopped to think about it, she’d been shocked to realize that she looked nothing like either one of her parents. Even at the age of six she could tell that. So she’d asked, and her mom had explained that even though Meg was her daughter and always would be, she’d had another mother for the first few hours of her life.

Her two moms had met after the virus and they’d been best friends, but before that Meg’s birth mom had been a movie star. Hadley Lucas. Meg had rolled the name around on her tongue while her mom, her second mom, had loaded a DVD into the machine they rarely used, and then a movie had popped up and she’d seen her mom, her first mom, for the very first time.

Meg hadn’t been sure what to think about it that day, and things hadn’t gotten any clearer as time had gone by. She had a Mom and a Dad she loved, and the other people, the ones who had been responsible for creating her but had died before she’d had the chance to get to know them, didn’t seem real. Especially her dad, who she didn’t even have a picture of, but even seeing the smiling face of Hadley Lucas on the TV couldn’t make the woman seem real to Meg.

She walked down the street with her mom and sister, thinking about the two parents she’d never met and wondering how her life would be different if Hadley Lucas had survived—or if the virus had never killed most of the population. It didn’t occur to Meg that she wouldn’t exist if the zombie virus had never been released, mostly because her mom had never explained to her how her birth parents had met, but it didn’t matter either. Meg was happy with the life she had and she loved her parents, and thinking about a different world was more like a fairy tale than anything else.

Margot never stopped talking as they walked, holding their mom’s hand and skipping down the streets of New Atlanta like she was the happiest little girl in the world. Megan walked on her other side, smiling quietly as Margot grinned and looked back and forth between her mom and big sister.

“Hold my hand, Meggy,” Margot said.

Before Meg had a chance to tell her no, Margot’s hand slid into hers. Meg rolled her eyes, but didn’t pull away. Her sister’s hand was small and bony in hers, but warm.

They’d almost made it to the end of the street before the scream cut through the happy atmosphere. Meg’s steps faltered, but her mom moved faster, pulling the girls with her. All around them people began to yell and run, and then someone called out the word that Meg had been raised to fear, and a shudder shot down her spine. Zombies. In the city.

Tears filled her eyes and she found herself holding onto her sister’s hand tighter. Margot was already crying and Meg knew she needed to be strong for her sake if nothing else, but these were zombies. Real ones. She’d seen them from far away, but never up close. How had they gotten in?

“Keep moving, girls,” their mom yelled.

There was fear in her eyes, but she held on tight to Margot’s hand as she ran, looking over her shoulder every few seconds to see if they were behind her. Meg wanted to look too, but she was afraid. Afraid that she’d see something she’d never be able to forget or that the second she took her eyes off the road in front of her she’d trip and fall.

The street was crowded and there were so many people around them that when her mom disappeared, Meg didn’t see it happen. Once second she was there, and then a scream ripped its way out of Margot and their mother was gone. Meg stopped running and looked around, but the people surrounding them were all strangers. They were running. Pushing. Crying. Screaming. No one was paying attention to Meg and her sister, and their mom was nowhere in sight.

Margot was sobbing and Meg knew that it was up to her to get her little sister to safety, so she held her little hand tighter and once again started running. She pushed people out of the way and pulled on her sister’s arm, trying to get her to move faster. Focusing on the street in front of them. Her own eyes were full of tears and everything in front of her was blurry, but she didn’t stop, didn’t even slow. Not for a second.

At least not until Margot’s hand was pulled from hers.

It felt like someone had ripped her away. One second she was there, her little hand wrapped around Meg’s, and then she was gone. A scream that could have come from Margot rose above the noise, but when Meg turned her sister wasn’t there. She spun around, looking through the crowd, but everything was crazy. And there was no Margot. There was no Mom. There was only her.

Meg screamed her sister’s name. She called for her mother. The words were almost lost in her sobs, but she didn’t stop. People ran past and pushed her aside, but Meg didn’t move. She didn’t know where to go or what to do, she just knew that she had to find her little sister and get her to safety.

Even when Meg saw the first zombie, she stood frozen in place.

Everything was so blurry from her tears that she was positive the terrifying face in the crowd couldn’t be real. But the thing was still there when she wiped the tears from her eyes, and then another appeared next to it, and another. They were rotten and gross. They reached for people and made sounds that caused Meg’s legs to shake. They were coming right toward her.

And she was frozen in place.

“Meg.” The boy popped up out of nowhere and put his arm around her. “Are you okay?”

People were still running and pushing each other and the zombies were still coming. Meg shook her head, unable to speak and uncertain what this boy, someone who was the same age as her, would be able to do anything to help. She felt sure that she was about to die.

“It’s going to be okay,” he said, and then her eyes adjusted and she recognized him. It was Jackson Star. His dad was the leader, the Regulator of New Atlanta. Maybe he could save her after all. Maybe he was just important enough that the zombies wouldn’t be able to touch him.

Jackson started to move but stopped, his eyes going from the zombies charging them to the people running for their lives. His expression changed, but Meg couldn’t figure out what he was thinking, and then it didn’t matter because right in front of her eyes a man tripped. He flew forward hard enough that he seemed to fly, and it happened so fast that she couldn’t believe it, and when he hit the ground he was right in front of the zombies.

It took a split second for them to attack, and then their teeth ripped into the man and blood sprayed across the street. He screamed, and he was so close that Meg could smell the rot and blood, and his screams were vibrating in her ears. She wanted to run, but Jackson didn’t move an inch. He watched the scene unfold as if captivated by it, and once again the expression on his face was so unfamiliar that Meg couldn’t figure out what he was thinking.

She started to cry harder and that seemed to snap Jackson out of his trance. He held her tighter and pulled her away from the zombies, pushing his way through the crowd as he led her to an alley. There he let her go long enough to move a couple crates aside.

“Get in,” he said, motioning to the opening he’d made.

She did as she was told and once she was safely inside, Jackson climbed in after her. He pulled another crate down so it was over their heads and Meg scooted as far back as she could. She was stuck between a crate and a dumpster that smelled like rotten food, but she felt safer here.

She couldn’t stop crying, though, not even when Jackson put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. She rested her face against his chest and he told her not to be scared. He told her it would be okay. He said everything she wanted to hear before she could even think it, until slowly she started to regain control and her tears died off. In his arms, with the world going crazy around her, Meg felt safe and protected, which was odd because she didn’t even know this boy and he wasn’t very big. He was smaller than she was, actually, but something about him made her believe that he would keep her safe.

“Thank you,” she said.

Jackson’s only response was to hold her tighter.

After what felt like decades, the screams died down. Jackson and Meg climbed out of their hiding place, but all she could think about was finding her mom and sister. There was so much blood on the street that she wanted to run back and hide. There were bodies, too. Some were zombies, their worn and filthy clothes giving them away even if their faces weren’t visible, but there were other bodies that had to be human, and the sight of their torn and bloody flesh made her stomach twist.

“Mom? Margot!”

Meg called their names and forced herself to search the street anyway. Jackson helped by looking at the bodies so she wouldn’t have to, something she would always be grateful for, but again and again they came up empty handed. Meg, who had just begun to calm down, felt her control start to slip away as they covered more and more ground, only to come up with nothing.

“They’re gone,” she said, her shoulders shaking from the sobs she was trying to hold in.

“Don’t.” Jackson grabbed her shoulders and held her gaze, and to Meg his brown eyes seemed so much older than he was. There was more depth and he seemed so much more capable than anyone she had ever known. “We’ll find them.”

They continued up the street, following the path of death the zombies had left in their wake. Meg worked hard to keep it together, and at her side Jackson felt like an impenetrable force, a rock that couldn’t be moved or a wall that couldn’t be broken down. He didn’t hesitate to look at the blood on the street or the mangled bodies strewn about, and Meg admired him for that. He was strong. He was steady. He would help her find her family.

When she caught a glimpse of blonde hair in an alley, she took off running.

Lying on her side just inside the opening of an alley, Meg found her mom. She was out cold, a gash on the side of her head. Her hair was matted with blood and her face streaked with dirt, and it took a great deal of effort to rouse her. But she finally opened her eyes, drawing a sigh of relief from Meg. Everything would be okay now. Her mom was awake and she would find Margot and then they would go home together.

“Meg?” Mom’s expression was confused for a few seconds, and then she blinked and pushed herself up, looking past Meg to the empty street at her back. “Where’s Margot?”

“I don’t know.” The tears returned, harder this time.

All Meg wanted was for her mom to wrap her arms around her and hold her close, but that’s not what happened. Instead she got to her feet, shaking her head like she was trying to chase away the fuzziness in her brain, and then she moved past her crying daughter and ran out into the street.

Jackson helped Meg up and put his arm around her, doing what her mother had not done. Together they followed her mom back onto the street where more people had started searching the death and mayhem for loved ones. She and Jackson searched too, checking every nook and cranny for Margot, but still they turned up nothing.

Before long the enforcers showed up, including Meg’s dad. By then her mom was nearly hysterical and Meg found it impossible to stop crying. They never stopped looking, and Jackson never left her side.

But all they found was Margot’s backpack. It was ripped and covered in blood, and most of the contents had been lost in the street. It wasn’t a body, but to Meg it told her what she needed to know. She’d been there, she had felt her sister’s hand get ripped from hers and she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Margot was gone.

They kept looking as the maintenance crew arrived and began collecting bodies. Meg’s parents refused to give up hope. Not even after all the remains had been loaded onto a truck. Not even when the sun had set and they’d returned home. Not the next day when there was still no word or the day after that. They held on for more than a week before accepting the truth, and every moment that passed during that time was torture for Meg because she felt with certainty that her parents blamed her for what had happened to Margot.

Jackson came to see her every day that week. He checked on her after school got out, brought her luxuries like chocolate bars. He comforted her while she cried, something her own parents had yet to do, too lost in their own grief over their missing child to realize that she was hurting as much as they were. During that week of hell, Jackson seemed to always be there for her when she needed him. He listened and comforted and let her cry on his shoulder, and with each day that passed, she felt a little more certain that he’d been sent by God to save her that day.

By the time Meg’s parents finally remembered that she existed, Margot had been dead for a week.

The first year after Margot’s death was the hardest of her life. She missed her sister, missed the companionship and fun they’d had together, but at the same time she felt smothered by her parents. They’d lost a child in the most horrible way possible, and they were determined never to let it happen again. Meg found herself trapped at home for long hours, her only companions her two cousins, Luke and Charlie, but even they were rarely home because they had friends outside their family.

Meg had never had friends, and it was during that year that she needed them more than anything. Which was why she was so grateful to have Jackson in her life. Their friendship had only grown stronger as the weeks after Margot’s death had stretched on. He became something she’d never had before, someone to lean on, and someone who didn’t care what her last name was.

Thanks to her family connections, Meg had found forming relationships difficult. She’d tried, back when she was younger and had first entered school, but the few attempts had led to uncomfortable questions from the children of fanatics. They’d asked personal things about her uncle and what he had been like, even sometimes going so far as to ask about her dad. It hadn’t taken long for her to realize that none of them really had an interest in getting to know her. It was all about Angus James.

Jackson, however, was different. Not only did he seem not care about her uncle at all, but his father was the Regulator of New Atlanta, which put him in a similar situation to hers. Plus, in Meg’s opinion, Jackson was a very misunderstood person.

Her family didn’t like him, they had made that much clear, and no matter how often she tried to get them to see the real Jackson Star, they refused to think of him as anything but the Regulator’s son. Not that it derailed their friendship.

The years passed and much to her family’s dismay, Meg’s relationship with Jackson grew. They were best friends. He was the first person she wanted to talk to when something good happened and the one she ran to when she needed a shoulder to cry on, but there was nothing romantic between them. Not even when they reached their teen years and the other kids around them began to pair off. There were times when Meg sensed that Jackson might want more from her, but to her their relationship was fine the way it was. Better than fine, actually. It was perfect.

Until she met Colton at the age of eighteen, Meg had never shown any real interest in boys or dating. Before then she’d never had a boyfriend, had never even wanted one since most of the boys in the settlement were much younger than she was. Between her family and Jackson, Meg was fairly certain that she had everything she needed, and there was even a part of her that thought one day she might be ready to take things to the next level with her best friend.

Colton changed all that.

They met accidentally one fall evening when Meg went to the wall to visit her dad. He was supposed to be on watch in the front tower, but when she climbed the ladder it only took a millisecond to realize that something wasn’t right. It was dark and the man in the tower had his back to her, but he was taller and broader than her father was.

“You’re not my dad,” Meg said, unable to hide her surprise.

The man shifted and a second later the soft glow of a lantern lit up the small space. He was already smiling when he turned, and when his dark blue eyes moved over her, the grin stretched wider.

“Thank God for that.”

Heat spread through her, but she found the feeling pleasant. Almost welcome.

He was young, in his early twenties, with eyes that twinkled when he laughed and dark hair that curled around his ears and at the nape of his neck. He had a dimple in his right cheek that made her want him to never stop smiling, and when he laughed it actually made her toes curl.

So instead of climbing back down the ladder, Meg stayed.

She and Colton talked for less than an hour that first night, but by the time she left she was head over heels. Unlike most people, he hadn’t asked about her uncle or anyone else in her family, and she could tell that he was genuinely interested in getting to know who she was. It was almost as if he had no clue who Angus James was at all. Or maybe he just didn’t care.

By the time she found the right tower and climbed in next to her father, Meg’s cheeks ached from smiling so much.

“There you are,” her dad said when she plopped down next to him. “Thought you’d be here a long time ago.”

“I climbed the north tower by accident.” If it was possible, her smile actually stretched wider. “I met Colton.”

Her dad narrowed his gray eyes on her. “That right?”

“Yeah. We talked for a little bit. He seems nice.” She looked down, trying to act casual even though she knew he could see right through her. “Do you know him?”

“Sure do.”

When he chuckled, Meg’s head snapped up. “Why are you laughing?”

“No reason,” he said, but he laughed harder.

“Dad!” She knew she sounded like a whiny kid, but his laughter made her cheeks grow warm, and for some reason she had the urge to cover her face.

“I’m sorry.” He bumped her with his elbow, not looking the least bit sorry. “Least I like this one.”

Meg sat up straighter. “You like Colton?”

Her father nodded, and there was a knowing look in his eyes that made Meg squirm, but it also made her suddenly hopeful for the future.

Two days later there was a knock on their door. Meg was the only one home and even though she was thrilled to open it and find Colton standing in the hall, she felt strangely unsure about inviting him inside.

Thankfully, he didn’t ask to come in.

“Hi.” In the light of day his smile was even more amazing, showing off his perfectly straight teeth.

“Hi,” she said, trying—and failing—not to think about how soft his lips looked.

At eighteen she’d never kissed a guy, although she and Jackson had come close a few times. She’d almost gone through with it, had been so close that she had felt his moist breath on her lips, but she’d always pulled back. Always felt like it was a step she shouldn’t rush. Now she found that she was glad, because even though she had just met Colton, she couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like to kiss him.

The silence stretched on as they stared at each other like two idiots until they both burst out laughing at the same time. It helped lighten the mood, and by the time Colton asked her out, she was once again at ease in his presence.

Meg couldn’t wait to tell her parents. Her dad had already given his approval, and when her mom got home from work she was just as thrilled as her father had been. It felt nice to have them excited about the date. After seven years of friendship with Jackson, her parents still hadn’t warmed to him, which was probably one of the biggest reasons Meg had never pursued a relationship with him. Even though she felt certain that her parents were overreacting, the idea of being with someone they disliked so much hurt.

Like everything else that happened in her life, Meg couldn’t wait to tell Jackson the news. Even though she hadn’t expected him to be jumping up and down to learn that she was going out with someone else, she’d hoped that he would at least be happy for her. He’d dated other girls—although he’d never admitted it to her, she knew he occasionally went out with the daughter of one of the council members—and it only seemed fair that he would support her in finding happiness as well. Only that wasn’t what happened.

“You’re going out with an enforcer?” Jackson spit the words out so violently that she felt like she’d been slapped.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

He scoffed. “You’re better than that. You’re a James.”

“My dad’s an enforcer. You know that.”

The disdain on Jackson’s face took her totally by surprise. Most of the children of the council members acted like they were better than everyone else, but Jackson had never acted that way before, at least not with her. Now though, he looked on the verge of spitting. As if the idea of her going out with someone who guarded the settlement was the same as whoring herself out in shantytown.

“Colton is a nice guy,” she argued. “You’d like him.”

Something flashed in Jackson’s eyes that made her realize he would not like anyone she dated. Ever.

Meg had always thought they were on the same page with their relationship, but standing in front of him at that moment, she found herself wondering if that was true. Was he waiting for her to change her mind? Did he think they would eventually end up together if he just waited long enough?

True, she’d had those thoughts herself, had even thought she was attracted to Jackson. But after her short time with Colton, she now knew that she’d been fooling herself. She thought Jackson was good looking enough, but that wasn’t the same as being attracted to another person. She was attracted to Colton. She felt tingles when she was close to him, had felt her breath catch when he reached out to touch her arm, had stared at his lips while he talked and imagined what it would be like to kiss him. None of those things happened with Jackson, though.

But he was still her friend.

“Jackson,” she said, reaching out for him. It hurt when he pulled away, but she went on anyway. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Then don’t go out with him.” He set his jaw in a way that Meg knew meant she wouldn’t be able to get through to him.

They rarely disagreed, had never fought, but something about this seemed different. She wasn’t willing to back down just to make him happy, though. As much as she loved Jackson, she had to put herself first.

“I’m going out with him,” she said, and then turned and walked away.

He’d get over it. If he loved her, he’d want her to be happy.

Things with Colton moved faster than she had ever thought possible. For their first date he took her to the small theater in the settlement, a luxury she rarely got to take advantage of, and then to the park. She had butterflies in her stomach the whole time, but it wasn’t because being with him made her nervous. In fact, it was easy, natural almost. No, the butterflies that refused to be quieted had more to do with excitement. Every look Colton gave her made her heart beat faster, and when he took her hand in his she felt weak in the knees. He had that affect on her, and even though she was no stranger to romance novels and had read about this very scenario dozens of times, experiencing it was a totally different sensation.

He didn’t kiss her when he took her home that night, and since their second date involved dinner with her parents, he didn’t that night either. It wasn’t until date number three that it finally happened. After they had dinner at one of the few restaurants in the entertainment district—which was really more of a bar—Colton had walked her to her apartment just like he had the first night, only this time they stopped outside the door.

“Have I told you how beautiful you are?” he whispered as he ran his hand down the side of her face.

“A couple times.”

Meg’s face flushed, but it was from him, not his words. From the warmth of his body, so close to hers, and the way his blue eyes studied her. His gaze moved to her lips and her breath caught in her throat, and she knew before he leaned forward that he was going to kiss her.

When his mouth touched hers, the first thought that went through her head was that she’d been so, so wrong about how soft his lips looked. They were a million times softer, and warm. The way they moved over hers made her heart pound in her ears, made her lean into him and lift herself up on the tips of her toes so she could be closer. His hands moved up her back and the simple touch seemed to set her on fire. The kiss deepened, and when he ran his tongue over her lips she opened her mouth, allowing him in.

It was a first kiss she would never forget.

The weeks stretched on and she saw Jackson very little. Colton took up all her time, was in her thoughts even when he wasn’t with her. He fit into her life so perfectly because her parents loved him, as did her aunts and uncles and cousins. He was kind and funny and smart and gentle, and she could feel herself falling for him, harder than she’d ever thought possible.

The more time they spent together, the more the relationship heated up. She knew he wanted to take the next step, and part of her did as well, but she held back because it was such a big step to take. Only four months ago she’d never even been kissed, and then Colton had swept into her life and consumed her, and before she even knew what happened everything had changed. Every moment they had alone they were in each other’s arms, kissing, touching, and exploring each other with a hunger she hadn’t known was possible.

He never pushed her. Never pressured her to do anything she wasn’t ready for, but it didn’t take long before she found it impossible to hold back.

Her father was working a late shift and Colton was already at their apartment when her mom got called out to deliver a baby. Left alone, they found their way to Meg’s room as usual, and it didn’t take long for things to heat up. Colton kissed his way down her neck, his hands moving over her curves and leaving trails of fire behind. Meg knew he wanted her, could feel how much as he moved his body against hers. Even with most of their clothes on what he was doing felt good, and just like every other time they’d found themselves in this situation, she couldn’t help wondering how it would feel to finally give in.

“I love you,” Colton whispered against her lips.

That did it for Meg. She wasn’t sure if she loved Colton, but she knew he meant what he said and that was enough for her.

“I’m ready,” she said, reaching for the zipper on his jeans.

Colton only hesitated for a moment, just long enough to search her gaze as if wanting to make sure she knew what she was doing. When she nodded, it was all the confirmation he needed.

Their clothes came off in a flurry, but Colton never stopped kissing her, never slowed in his caresses. He took his time, making sure she was comfortable and ready, and driving her wild with his need to please her. It made the experience perfect. Made her feel like they were perfect, made her want more of him, all of him, for the rest of her life.

Meg was still flying high the next morning when she woke. Colton had stayed late into the night, but slipped out before her parents had returned home even though she was certain they wouldn’t have cared if he’d stayed. She could see it in their eyes when they looked at him. They thought he was as perfect as she did.

She was at work when she got the news, and it blindsided her so thoroughly that she couldn’t even cry at first. The enforcer who came to the food center to tell her Colton had been killed was a stranger, and he said it in such a callous and blunt way that she almost didn’t believe him.

“How?” she asked, thinking that if he would just explain what had happened he would realize that it was all a mistake.

“There was an incident outside the wall and he insisted on going by himself. He got attacked. It was a pretty big horde.”

She closed her eyes when the image of Colton being ripped apart by teeth flashed through her head. Her legs wobbled and she had to grab the counter. One of her coworkers, an older woman named June, grabbed her so she didn’t fall. Everyone was talking, asking her if she was okay and if they should call someone, but Meg couldn’t think.

Who did she want to call?

The last time she’d felt this painful emptiness had been when Margot died. Jackson had been there for her then. He’d stayed strong while her parents fell apart, had helped keep Meg standing when she’d wanted to crumble. For some reason, she felt certain that he would do that for her again.

“I have to go,” she said, pulling out of June’s grasp and running from the food center.

The tears started falling as she ran, and by the time she reached Jackson’s house, she was sobbing. She banged on the door, her entire body shaking and her legs so unsteady she thought she might fall to the ground.

It seemed to take forever for the door to open, but when it did Jackson was standing there. She fell against him and sobbed. His hair was wet like he’d just gotten out of the shower, and little drops of cool water fell on her warm face, mixing with her tears until she felt like she might drown. Jackson scooped her up and carried her inside, and just like when her sister was killed, he said all the right things. He held her, he comforted her, and he gave her a shoulder to cry on. She couldn’t speak to tell him what had happened, but like the true friend he was, he didn’t need to know what she’d been through to be there for her.

The years dragged on after Jane’s death. His days were a mixture of sleep and tests. They drew blood so often that his arms were always sore and riddled with scars that he knew would never fade, but he registered very little of what happened to him, and he knew that the external scars he wore were nothing compared to the scars he carried inside.

When Jane had been alive, even back in the early days when she’d been clinical and cold, she’d always made sure Angus was given the chance to stay groomed. Having a razor or anything else sharp in his cell was out of the question, but every few weeks, while he was in twilight sleep, Jane had had someone cut his hair and trim his beard. But that stopped with her death, and it wasn’t long before his beard and hair had grown out of control, turning him into a shaggy version of the man he’d once been. Not that he cared. There was very little Angus cared about anymore.

He shut the world out as best as he could. He barely left his bed, was asleep more than he was awake, and he refused to think about anything other than what he needed to do so he could once again drift off to sleep.

But it was impossible to escape reality completely. Not with the constant tests, blood draws, and injections of new, more powerful viruses. The mutated versions they pumped into his veins never turned him, but there were many moments when he wished they would. Some strains had no effect on him at all while others seemed to burn their way through his veins, reminding him of the strain that had taken Jane from him. He would become ill, too. Vomiting, barely able to maintain control of his bowels. He’d rage with fever and hallucinate that zombies had surrounded him and were making a midnight snack out of his body. His screams were so loud that they’d echo in his own ears, but he couldn’t stop them from tearing their way out of him.

He fought the guards when they came in now. It was the only time he showed that he had any life left in him. They would come into his room and surround him, hold him down, and he would kick and fight and bite, anything and everything to try and stop them from filling his blood with more poison. He never won, but he didn’t expect to, and it didn’t matter because the important thing was letting them know that he would never surrender.

With Jane gone, Star had begun showing up at Angus’s window more and more often. The man had rarely shown up on the observation wing before, leaving the details to his most trusted doctor, and having the little man there, staring at him for hours on end, unnerved Angus. Mostly because he wanted to be able to hold on to the picture of Jane standing at that window, and over time the image of Star started to replace her in his mind. He didn’t want that. Didn’t want to forget what she’d looked like and felt like, didn’t want to forget what it had felt like to have another human being close to him.

Months turned into years and he became so deprived for human contact that he began to crave the tests. He still fought, he still refused to give in, but he wanted contact just the same. There was a constant battle raging inside him. His need to fight, to refuse to give himself over to these people, was nearly overshadowed by his overwhelming desire to feel another person. To remember what it was like to have skin-to-skin contact, to carry on a conversation. To have someone care.

Over time, another face began to appear at the window, usually at Star’s side. It only took one look at the boy to know it was the man’s son. He was young, probably only fifteen or sixteen, and only a little bigger than his father, but the coldness in his eyes put even the elder Star to shame. His gaze turned Angus’s blood to ice, made him dread the years the way he never had before. It was obvious that Star was grooming his son to take over, and Angus had no doubt that when that day came, he would very much wish he were dead.

Time passed with one day bleeding into the next, making it impossible to know how many weeks had gone by. Helen came frequently to draw blood, whispering in his ear that his daughter was safe and healthy and doing well. She promised that they would one day get him out, but he didn’t believe it. He’d thought he was going to get out once before and that had failed, and he was sure that if he gave in to hope once again, only to be disappointed, it would destroy him.

So he slept. He slept days away, weeks even, ignoring the pain that never quite left him. In his dreams he was a different man in a different place. Jane was there often, and his daughter, who never grew older than ten. Axl and Vivian made frequent appearances, as did their own daughters. In his dreams they had never come to Atlanta and he had never been a prisoner.

When he was awake, though, he clung to the memory of their last night together. Jane’s body had been pressed up against his, warm and soft and inviting, and he’d held her close, savoring the beat of her heart. That’s when she’d told him.

“I want you to know something,” she whispered. “In case something happens to me but you get out.”

“Don’t talk like that,” he’d said.

“No.” She had pulled away just a little so she could twist to face him on the bed. “I have to tell you.” Jane had paused long enough to swallow, and the heaviness of it had weighed on Angus. He’d had a feeling that she was about to drop a bomb and he wasn’t sure if he wanted her to. He wasn’t sure if he could handle more of her secrets. “There’s a failsafe. Star created it back when he made the virus, before he ever released it on the world. It’s a bacteria that when released will destroy the zombies.”

“Destroy ‘em?” Angus had asked, unsure he’d heard her right.

“Yes. It will eat away at their brains until they die for good, but it’s been altered so that it only works on those affected by the zombie virus. He has tons of it stored away in the basement of the CDC. Just in case. It’s in biosafety level three, and only a handful of people have access to the lab. People hardly ever go there because it holds the deadliest viruses known to man. Star knows it’s safe there. That no one will find it. He and I are the only two people who know about it.”

“Then go get it,” Angus had said, unable to believe that she knew something so big but refused to do anything about it. “Get it and release it.”

“I can’t. Star will know if I access the lab and I won’t risk it, not while you and our child are still prisoners. I need to wait until you’re out before I do it.” She sucked in a deep breath. “Just in case something happens to me, though, you need to know my code so you can get to it. Are you listening?” Angus had nodded. “It’s 1005637853.”

There were so many numbers, and he’d been terrified that he would forget it. That he would get out, but something would happen to Jane and he wouldn’t be able to remember the code. She had repeated it to him, and he’d said it back. They’d done this over and over again until it was burned in his brain. Praying he never needed it. Praying their escape would go as planned and once he and their daughter were safe, Jane would be able to take care of it herself.

It hadn’t gone that way, though, and after Jane had died, Angus had hidden the number in the crossword book she’d given in. He’d spread it out, filling in the blanks with words and names. The people he knew and places he’d been were scattered all over the pages, making it look like the ranting of a madman. But within those pages, scattered around so no one would be the wiser, he’d hidden the code so he would never be able to lose it. But the knowledge that he was the only person other than Star who knew that a failsafe existed haunted him.

The prick of a needle woke him from a deep sleep. He opened his eyes and bolted upright, ready to fight back, but the room was pitch black and instead of guards there was a solitary figure kneeling by his bed.

“What the—”

Grogginess unlike anything he’d ever felt before moved through his body, and the words died on his lips. It happened as fast as lightning, and in an instant he went from ready to fight to barely able to keep his eyes open.

“Just lie back.” A gravelly female voice clawed its way from the darkness. “Next time you wake up, you’ll be free.”

Angus shook his head but he couldn’t talk, and he couldn’t stop his body from sinking back onto the bed. The darkness grew thicker until it felt like he was wrapped in it. The blood pounding in his ears got louder, but slower too, more drawn out. He suddenly felt like he had been dunked in a tank of ice water.

He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out, and then the drug won and he was pulled into unconsciousness.

Waking up was slow, much like it had been twenty years ago when he’d first come out of the chemically induced coma that had been forced on him. This time when he opened his eyes, however, he knew he wasn’t in a hospital room.

The walls were soft gray and the bed he was lying on was plush, and better than anything he’d felt over the last two decades with the exception of Jane. The light glowing from the small lamp in the corner was soft and unobtrusive, nothing like the florescent lights he’d grown accustomed to. He shifted and found the door on the other side of the room open, and beyond that a living room was visible.

He didn’t move, trying to remember what had happened so he could determine whether or not this was a dream. The years had been hard on him, and the memories were difficult to dwell on, but most of them consisted of him lying in bed. He could remember nothing happening that would have brought him here, but he was certain this was real. Mainly because his head was pounding in a way that reminded him of a hangover, something he hadn’t experienced in decades, and because his bladder was begging for relief.

Angus sat, pushing himself up slowly to be sure his body could handle it. He remembered clearly those first few days after he woke from his coma. He’d been weak, and the first time he’d tried to stand he had almost fallen on his ass.

His legs when he stood now, however, didn’t feel any more unsteady than they had the last time he’d stood. He wasn’t sure how long ago that had been, but the fact that his legs held him up meant not much time had passed.

The house—or apartment, he wasn’t sure which—was silent. He stepped out of the room and paused so he could look around, admiring the pristine kitchen, dining room, and living area beyond that. To his right, visible through a cracked door, was another bedroom.

He spotted two other doors on the other side of the room and headed that way, knowing that he wouldn’t be able hold off on using the toilet for much longer. He hit the jackpot with the first door he opened, but once he had relieved his bladder ,he wasn’t sure what to do with himself.

He was standing in the middle of the room looking around when a door behind him opened. He turned, ready to put up a fight even though it was obvious from his surroundings that these people meant him no harm, but the determination melted away the second he set eyes on the teenage girl in front of him.

She looked like her mother. She had been ten the last time he’d seen her, a skinny child who hadn’t seen the light of day in years, but she was a woman now. Eighteen. She was taller than he’d expected her to be, and thin. Her skin was flawless except for the scars in the crook of her arms, and her cheeks were glowing and healthy. She’d colored her hair pink and even though it was a shock to him at first, it seemed to suit her.

Of all the changes, and there were many, the biggest one was the light in her eyes. She’d been happy when she was with him, but her expression had always been filled with loneliness. She’d been a prisoner and had known it, and the look in her eyes had haunted both his dreams and his waking hours. Now, however, his daughter’s gray eyes sparkled with life.

“Daddy,” she said, taking a couple steps toward him. A smile spread across her face. “How are you feeling?”

“This ain’t real,” he said. It couldn’t be real, because if it was that would mean he was free, and Angus James had given up on the idea of freedom eight years ago.

“It is.” She walked closer, but slowly. Hesitantly. She didn’t look afraid, though, it was almost like she’d been warned to give him time to adjust. “Helen got you out. She injected you with the same drug that I was injected with, and they thought you were dead. We saved you.”

Angus shook his head, but he was starting to think it was true. He had dreamt about his daughter almost every night since they’d taken her away in a body bag, but never once had she looked any different than the ten-year-old he’d last seen, and he knew that he never could have imagined the beautiful girl standing in front of him. He wasn’t that creative.

“It’s you?” he asked, his voice catching in his throat. “You’re real?”

“I’m real.”

She closed the distance between them and found her way into his arms. She was bigger than she’d been the last time he’d held her, but still familiar. Her smell was the same, her body heat as well, and she still sighed when she snuggled her face against his neck.

“I missed you,” she whispered. “I’ve thought about you every day. I never stopped hoping we’d be able to save you.”

“I never thought I’d see you again,” he said against the top of her head. “Never thought I’d make it out of there alive.”

“Helen did her best.” His daughter pulled back so she could look up at him. “Getting you out was a lot harder than getting me out. Star didn’t take Jane’s betrayal lightly.”

“Your mom,” Angus said, wanting to set the record straight so she would know who Jane had been.

“No.” His daughter shook her head. “Helen is my mother, Jane was… I don’t know what she was. I know you loved her and I forgive her for what she did to us, but I don’t know what she was to me.”

All of Angus’s dreams about having a happy family with his daughter and the woman he’d loved melted away. They never could have come true, but it hurt to know that his daughter wouldn’t accept Jane as her real mother. Understandable, but painful still.

The door on the other side of the room opened once again and Angus looked up just as Helen and a man walked in.

“Sorry to interrupt,” the man said, smiling to reveal a gap in his mouth where his two front teeth used to be.

Helen stopped next to the dining room table and pulled one of the chairs out. She motioned toward it, her gaze on Angus. “I want to make sure you’re okay. Jane made that drug and it worked on Glitter, but who the hell knows what kind of side effects come with it.”

“Glitter?” Angus asked as he obediently sank into the chair.

“That’s my name now,” his daughter said, smiling sheepishly. “I was ten when I picked it and I know it’s kind of stupid, but I can’t bring myself to change it now.”

“Glitter,” he repeated the word slowly like he was rolling it around in his mouth.

It sounded like a stripper’s name, which got him thinking about Vivian and all the shit he’d given her back when they first met. He’d really hated her back then. Hated that she had stolen his brother’s attention. Hated that she’d changed Axl. Now, though, the idea of his daughter having a name that reminded him of Vivian felt good. Right even.

“I like it,” he said finally.

Glitter beamed as she took the chair next to him.

He didn’t take his eyes off his daughter as Helen checked him over, taking his blood pressure and checking his pulse, listening to his heart and checking his reflexes. It felt so unreal to be sitting there, staring into his little girl’s gray eyes and knowing that they were both safe. Finally.

“Tell me ‘bout yourself,” he said to his daughter once Helen had given him the all clear.

And she did. She told him about waking up in the same bed that he had, about seeing Helen and knowing that she didn’t ever have to go back again. The first few years had been rough, but in a good way. She’d learned to read and write, things she’d missed out on growing up in a prison cell, and had worked on healing, both inside and out. For a couple years they’d only let her go out at night, afraid that someone might recognize her, but she’d been happy because she had her mother back, and Dragon had taken on the job as a father figure.

“But not my father,” Glitter said, putting her hand on Angus’s. “I never forgot who my father was.”

Angus blinked away the tears. “But you go out now?”

“I do. Not a lot because I live and work here, but enough that I feel free.”

Free. The word felt so unreal to Angus that he found it impossible to hold his tears back. They slid down his cheeks and Glitter moved closer. She wrapped her arms around him and held him as he cried, releasing twenty years of anger and pain and loneliness. Trying so hard to accept that he was safe now and that things would get better. That he could get better.

“I wanna see my brother.” He pulled away from his daughter, but he didn’t let her go.

The man who called himself Dragon frowned. “We need to be careful.”

“I gotta,” Angus insisted. “I gotta see him. See all of ‘em.”

“Angus—” Helen scooted closer and placed her hand on his knee. “We know how important it is that you see your family, but there are complications.”

“What kinda complications?” Angus asked.

“Meg, your niece, she’s friends with Jackson Star.”

Jackson Star. The name sent a chill shooting through Angus. He was dangerous, so much more dangerous than his father. Angus had lived with evil for twenty years, so he knew what it looked like, and what he saw in that boy’s eyes would rival the devil.

“You gotta get her away from him.”

But Megan and Jackson weren’t the only problem and Angus knew it. Now that he was free, Axl was in danger. Star and his asshole son had lost their little pet and they’d want a replacement. They’d want Axl.

“Shit. You gotta get me in touch with Axl.” Angus got to his feet, the sudden urge to run out of the room and track his brother down so he could warn him was overwhelming, only he had no idea where he was right now or where Axl even lived. “We gotta go. Now.”

“We will.” Dragon stood so he could look Angus in the eye. “I promise. We will make it happen.”

“You gotta make it happen now,” Angus hissed. He took one step and the room swayed, and he was forced to grab the back of a chair so he didn’t fall down.

His daughter—Glitter—was at his side in a second. “Are you okay?”

“Sit,” Helen urged. “Take it easy.”

Angus shook his head. “You ain’t listenin’ to me. We gotta get to Axl now.”

This time, Dragon seemed to sense the urgency in his voice. “Why?”

Angus met his gaze. “Because he’s immune too.”

Silence covered the room. Helen shook her head and her gaze met Dragon’s. Angus could tell that they’d had no idea, and he wondered why Jane had never thought to tell Helen. Why had it never occurred to them that Axl should be warned before they dragged Angus out of the CDC? He should have been alerted to the danger that was coming, taken somewhere safe so he didn’t get snatched up. But they prepared nothing, and now Axl was a sitting duck. Angus had no doubt that Star would have put his plans in motion the second he thought his test subject had died, which meant they were running out of time. And there always existed the possibility that they were too late.

“How long have I been out?” he asked, looking between them.

“Close to eleven hours,” Helen replied. “You slept a lot longer than Glitter did.”

Angus sank into a chair. “Then he’s gone. No way Star hasn’t done something already.”

He looked up, hoping to see some sign that he was wrong, but Dragon and Helen’s eyes reflected the same hopelessness that Angus felt inside.

“We didn’t know,” Dragon said. “We would have planned things differently. We would have done something.”

“I’m sorry,” Helen said.

Angus was sorry too. So sorry that he found himself wishing he were back inside the CDC so Axl could be free.

He’d been working the wall when he got the message from Jackson. It was the most cryptic thing he’d ever seen and there wasn’t a damn thing about it that hadn’t made him uneasy, but he had known that he couldn’t ignore it. Jackson Star might have been a slimy little prick, but he had a lot of power in the settlement and the last thing Axl wanted to do was get on the Stars’ bad side.

So he’d headed to the CDC after work as requested, flipping the words over and over in his mind the whole way there like he might be able to figure out what was coming if he just read between the lines.

Axl-

I know you’ve never been a fan of mine, but there’s something very important concerning your daughter that I need to discuss with you. Please come and see me at the CDC at your earliest convenience.

-Jackson Star

Megan and the little prick had been teetering on the brink of a relationship for years, and Axl was almost positive the note had something to do with that, although he hoped not. So many times when she was younger he’d wanted to forbid her from spending time with Jackson, but he’d held back. Mainly because Vivian had convinced him it would only push Megan into the creep’s arms. He supposed his wife had been right about that, but it hadn’t made seeing her with the guy any easier.

Things had gotten better when she’d met Colton, though, and Axl was positive that if his daughter’s boyfriend hadn’t been killed they would still be together. Megan’s attachment to Jackson had been stronger than ever afterward, something that had always felt a little too convenient for Axl’s taste.

By the time he reached the CDC, he’d pretty much convinced himself that Jackson was about to ask permission to marry his daughter—something he would never give. Internally, Axl was seething. He knew there was something wrong with Jackson Star and he couldn’t figure out why Megan was so blind to it.

When he arrived at the CDC, he asked for directions to Jackson’s office and was told to wait. Less than fifteen minutes later a guard he’d never seen before emerged from the back, gun on hip and in full display.

“Follow me,” the man said, unsmiling.

Axl did as he was told, and to his shock he was led deep into the CDC. Through halls he’d never visited and doors that had to be opened with codes. The man in front of him never said a word or even glanced his way, and the further they went, the more Axl found himself wondering if this visit had anything to do with Megan at all. He also couldn’t help thinking that he shouldn’t have come.

Of course, by that point it was too late. Axl had just decided that he definitely should have ignored the note and gone home when his armed escort stopped at a closed door and rapped his knuckles against it. Axl shifted just enough that he was able to unlatch his own gun without being conspicuous. This was exactly why he’d become an enforcer. Because he didn’t trust the people in charge as far as he could throw them.

“Come in,” Jackson called from the other side of the door.

The armed guard turned the knob and pushed the door open, motioning for Axl to step inside. He hated the idea of putting his back to this man, but he didn’t have a choice. He was so deep in the CDC that there was nowhere to run.

He stepped through the door.

“Axl.” Jackson stood when he entered. “Thank you for coming.” He stepped around the desk with a smile on his face that was so big it looked grotesque, and held out his hand.

Axl’s stomach rolled as he stared at the outstretched hand. He had no desire to shake it, but he wasn’t sure if he should make the man in front of him angry. He was young, but dangerous, and provoking him might not be the best idea.

He must have taken too long to decide, because Jackson dropped his hand to his side. “I get it.” His smile changed, morphing into something smaller but more genuine, and the evilness behind it didn’t escape Axl.

“You wanted to talk to me ‘bout Megan?” he asked, anxious to get to the point so he could get out of there.

Jackson blinked, trying to look startled but falling short. “Meg?” he said, then shook his head. “I’m sorry, I should have been more clear. This isn’t about Meg. This is about Margot.”

“What ‘bout her?” Axl growled, the sudden mention of his dead daughter’s name bringing memories and feelings to the surface that he’d tried a long time ago to suppress.

“She’s here.”

The words slammed into him.

“No.” Axl shook his head and took a step back. For just a moment, he felt like he was going to fall. “She ain’t. She’s dead.”

Jackson’s smile widened. “She’s alive. That’s what I wanted to tell you. I was only a kid when they took her and I just recently discovered who she was, so of course I wanted to make sure she was reunited with her family.” He took a step toward the door. “I can take you to her right now if you want.”

Axl couldn’t breathe well enough to ask any questions and he followed automatically when Jackson left the office and started walking. The other man’s smile now looked to Axl like a reflection in a funhouse mirror, distorted and twisted, and deep down he knew that following Jackson was most likely going to lead to his demise, but he couldn’t stop what he was doing. Couldn’t turn and walk away when his daughter, his little Margot, might be alive after all this time.

Nine years. That’s how long it had been since he’d seen her. The day she died he’d nearly died too, and if it hadn’t been for Vivian and Megan, he probably would have.

Believing for all these years that Margot had been killed by zombies had been bad enough, but it was nothing compared to what he felt as he followed Jackson even deeper into the belly of the CDC. What had his daughter been subject to over the last nine years? Had she suffered? Had they taken care of her? Was Jackson telling the truth? There were too many questions for Axl to grab on to even one, and he wasn’t positive that he wanted to know the answers to any of them.

The guard followed them, sticking close to Axl as they walked. They didn’t talk and Jackson didn’t look back at him until he stopped in front of a closed door. He glanced over his shoulder, that same twisted grin lighting up his face, and Axl’s stomach dropped so low he felt like it had been pulled down to hell.

Jackson typed a code into the keypad and a little green light next to the buttons lit up. The door clicked and a second later it was pulled open. Axl stepped through when Jackson motioned for him to go ahead.

The hall was white and impeccable, the florescent lights on the ceiling so bright that they seemed like spotlights. Windows and doors lined both sides of the hall, with keypads mounted next to them. The odor of bleach was so powerful that it made Axl’s eyes water, but it wasn’t strong enough to completely mask the scent of death.

“This way,” Jackson said, passing Axl and heading down the hall.

He followed, keeping pace with the younger man even though each step brought a deep sense of doom to him. He peered through the windows they passed, into rooms of horror where half-decayed creatures stared back at him. Each sight was worse than the last, not because they grew more and more grotesque, but because they became more and more human.

“Here,” Jackson said when he’d stopped next to a window. “Your daughter.”

Axl stopped at his side, but he had to force himself to look through the window. When he did, he had to grip the wall to stop himself from falling.

It was her. Nine years had aged her, but it hadn’t changed her enough that he didn’t recognize his own child. She seemed to be asleep, strapped down to a table and practically naked, covered only by the wide strips of nylon that held her down. Scars lined the inside of her arms and tubes ran from her body to machines as if they were the only things keeping her alive. It was like something out of a futuristic sci-fi movie from the past. Had she been like this for all these years? Was this how they kept her all the time?

Axl tore his gaze away from Margot so he could look at Jackson. “She’s been here this whole time? Nine years?”

“She has.” He let out a deep sigh. “I know it seems like a long time, but nine years is really nothing. I mean, your brother was here for twenty before he finally died, so when you think about it that way, Margot still has a lifetime of pain to endure.”

The words were like a bullet piercing Axl’s heart. He reached for his gun, but the guard was too fast and before he could get his hand on it his body was slammed against the glass. He let out a scream of frustration, fighting to get free, but the man at his back had the advantage and he couldn’t move.

“Did I mention that you’re immune?” Jackson’s face was so close to his that Axl could feel his hot breath. “Thank you for making this so easy for me.”

The prick of a needle against his neck made Axl jerk, but he had nowhere to go. His face was pressed up against the glass when the drug entered his system. It was cold, chilling his veins as it moved through him. He watched his daughter as it took affect; saw it when her eyes opened. His eyes began to shut, but he fought to keep them open. Fought to keep Margot in front of him. Fought to hold onto consciousness. When his eyes closed next, he knew he’d lost.

The next time he opened his eyes the world was hazy, but not enough to hide the fact that he was still in the CDC. He tried to move but soon realized that he was tied down. Tubes ran from his arms to IV bags, dripping fluid and who knew what else into his body. His head throbbed, but even worse was the throbbing in his chest when he thought about what Vivian and Megan were going through.

And Margot.

God, how could this have happened to them? In his half-conscious state, Axl tried to think back over everything that had happened in his life, wondering what he had done that was so horrible that he deserved to be punished like this. He couldn’t think of much, though. He and Angus had robbed a few convenience stores back when the virus first broke out, in a stolen SUV using stolen gas, but that couldn’t be bad enough to warrant this. And after that he’d done everything he could to help others. He’d been the best husband he could be, a devoted dad. He’d worked his ass off to help this settlement thrive even though he hadn’t trusted the man in charge. All that good and yet he’d ended up here.

He closed his eyes when the room spun, suddenly nauseous but unsure if it was because he was trapped here or if it was a side effect of whatever drugs they’d given him.

He woke for the second time when a nurse came into his room check on him. She was a thin woman with short hair and skin that looked weathered by the sun, but her touch was gentle when she set a hand on his arm.

“Take it easy. I’m going to check your vitals and then we can see about letting you up.” Her voice was gravelly when she spoke, but kind, and the expression in her brown eyes swam with sympathy.

Axl stayed silent while she checked him over, and when she had loosened his restraints and helped him sit up he whispered a quiet thanks.

“Don’t stand up yet,” she said, “I don’t want you to fall.”

Her eyes moved to the door at her back where two guards stood, armed and ready. For what Axl wasn’t sure. He barely had enough energy to keep his eyes open let alone resist, and he was pretty certain at that moment that this waif of a woman could have taken him in a fight.

As if seeing the question in his eyes, the woman said, “They’re just a precaution. The man who used to be in this room had a feisty side.”

She held his gaze and Axl couldn’t help thinking that she was trying to tell him something. He suddenly remembered the moments that had passed just before he was injected with that drug. Jackson had said that Angus had been in the CDC for twenty years, and now this woman was saying that the previous occupant of this room had been feisty. Could his brother have spent the last twenty years in this very room?

Axl looked around, taking in the tight space and sparse furnishings. On the other side of the room were stacks of books, all of them so worn that it looked as if they’d been read hundreds of times, and a few other items. A deck of cards, a couple pencils.

“That right?” Axl said, turning his gaze back to the woman. Once again he felt like she was trying to convey something to him with her eyes.

“It is.” She removed his IV and cleaned the site with an alcohol pad as she glanced back toward the guards one more time. In a voice so low Axl barely heard her she said, “Your brother is alive. We got him out and we’ll get you out too. Hang in there. Whatever you do, just hold on.”

Then she gathered her supplies and stepped back, not giving him another look before leaving him to wonder if she’d really said all those things or if he had been hallucinating.

After she left, Axl got to his feet. She had been right to warn him not to get up too fast. His legs were unsteady and when he took his first step the room tilted. He was wearing nothing but a hospital gown, but when he searched the room for clothes he turned up nothing.

The drug he’d been given hadn’t worn off completely yet, so Axl went to the couch on the other side of the room and sat down. It was stiff with barely any give. Uncomfortable and cheap. Had Angus sat here? Had this couch been the most comfort he’d received over the last twenty years?

Axl’s gaze moved over the bookshelf, stopping on a book of crossword puzzles whose pages were folded at the corners and worn from use. On instinct he picked it up and leafed through it. The first several puzzles had been finished, some of them with words scribbled out and new letters written outside the boxes. The further he got into the book, though, the more empty boxes he found.

He almost put it down after passing a few puzzles that had been left completely blank, but instead continued turning the pages, and before long more writing showed up. Only the words written in these boxes weren’t answers to the puzzles. They were names and places, locations he recognized. Axl. Vivian. Emily. Hadley. Jon. Rambo. Megan. San Francisco. Vegas. Colorado. Every single word Axl saw was familiar, and every time he read one the pain inside him increased.

He turned the page and saw more of the same: names of the people he loved filling box after box. He turned another page and the pattern repeated itself, and then another and another, each page seemingly more of the same until he reached one that made him freeze. It was different, but the same. The words written in the boxes didn’t match the clues, but they made no sense. Father. Baby. Daughter. Jane.

Where had these come from?

Axl turned the page and the words were repeated. Page after page held the same words, but still no clue as to what they meant. Why had Angus chosen to write these words? What had happened to him inside this room that made these words pop up?

The feeling of being watched made Axl’s back stiffen. He slipped the book back onto the shelf before turning to face the window, knowing who would be there before he’d even set eyes on the man.

Jackson Star stood on the other side of the glass, watching him.

Axl stood, and then rubbed his hand down his face when the grogginess increased. The expression on Jackson’s face was impossible to read, but he knew that whatever was going through the man’s head couldn’t be good.

He wanted to strangle Jackson, to watch him die slowly and painfully, but he also wanted to talk to him. To know that he was the only one who had been taken and that his family was still safe and secure.

Axl didn’t know for sure, but he assumed there was some kind of intercom system here so they could communicate, so he pointed to the door, hoping the other man would get the point.

Jackson didn’t even hesitate to move to the door, and a second later his voice crackled through the air. “Yes.”

“Tell me they’re alright,” Axl managed to get out.

“Your family?” Jackson asked, not showing even the tiniest hint of emotion.

It was a game and Axl knew it, but one he couldn’t afford to play. “Yeah,” he said, letting out a sigh. “I gotta know.”

Jackson’s lips curled into the same twisted smile he’d had on his face the day he brought Axl here. “Don’t worry, I’m taking good care of Meg.”

Axl swore, but he doubted Jackson heard it because the little prick had already stepped away from the window.

Heat flared inside him and he slammed his hand against the window, screaming. “I’ll kill you! I’m gonna cut your fuckin’ throat!”

Jackson was laughing when he turned his back on Axl.

He banged on the glass three more times even though he knew it was useless. When he dragged himself back to the couch his legs felt weak and his fist throbbed. Even worse, he knew he’d worn himself out for nothing. Jackson wasn’t shaken by anything, and hurling threats at him—even if he had been able to hear them—had been a waste of energy.

Axl sank back on the couch and pulled the crossword book back out, thumbing through it again in hopes of finding something that would tell him what his brother had endured over the last twenty years.

The nurse returned the next day and drew blood, and even though Axl was dying to ask her questions about Angus, he knew it wasn’t safe. The guards at her back stayed too close and were paying him too much attention. He couldn’t risk putting his brother at risk.

She left without saying a word to him, but the look in her eyes told him he hadn’t been hallucinating the day before.

Only a short time later the asshole showed up again. He stood outside Axl’s cell and just stared at him, grinning that same evil smile. Axl knew the other man was trying to unnerve him, so he held on to his composure as best as he could even though what he really wanted to do was spit on the glass.

After a moment Jackson reached for the intercom, and a second later the sound of screaming filled Axl’s cell. It was a cry of agony, of torture, and no matter how much he wanted to hang on to his indifference he couldn’t stop from reacting.

“I ain’t scared of you,” he spit out, wanting Jackson to know that he wouldn’t give in no matter what the asshole put him through.

“I don’t believe you.” The asshole’s smile grew. “Maybe you don’t care what happens to you, but I know you care what happens to everyone else. We have plans for everyone you love. Joshua is already gone, I think you missed that part while you were unconscious, and your wife is on the brink of losing her mind.”

Axl’s heart tore in half and he found it impossible to keep the pain he felt inside from seeping out.

A look of triumph flashed across Jackson’s face. “Parvarti and Al have dangerous jobs, as you well know, and the rest of your family are easy targets. Lila, a flick of my wrist and I can end her. Charlie, well, I think I’ll keep her around. Just for fun.” Jackson’s grin grew. “Then there’s Meg. Sweet, innocent Meg. I think you have a good idea what’s in store for her. In fact, I think you’ve always known.”

Axl stepped closer to the window, his chest almost touching the glass. “Don’t you touch her.”

Jackson’s sneer was so sick and twisted that no matter what he did, Axl couldn’t hold in his rage. Heat spread through him and before he knew what he was doing he was once again beating his fists against the window. He screamed obscenities at Jackson, who only laughed at the outburst, making Axl even angrier. He couldn’t rein it in, couldn’t do anything but pound on the glass and yell even after Jackson had walked away.

He learned after only two days that life in the CDC was a strict routine.

Lights came on at the same time each day and shortly after that breakfast was served. He took a shower every morning, which was warm and should have been refreshing had the stall not been so cramped that he felt like he was going to be crushed alive. When he’d dried himself off he looked around one more time, hoping someone had slipped clothes into his room while he slept. There was nothing, though, and he once again put the hospital gown on, careful that it was tied in the back.

Was this the only thing Angus had had to wear day after day, night after night for the past twenty years?

The tests started during late morning. Blood pressure, temperature, reflexes being tested. It was always the same. Sometimes they drew blood, but not always. Jackson Star walked by several times a day, apparently just so he could gawk at him.

When that was done, Axl would once again flip through the crossword book in hopes of discovering some kind of pattern, but nothing ever popped up. He found another book whose spine was so worn that it was starting to fall apart and looked through that too. It was a murder mystery.

Had Angus read this book? How many times? Ten? Fifty? A hundred?

Two other meals were brought to him, each at the same time and each consisting of just enough food to keep him alive, and only a few hours after dinner, like clockwork, all the lights in the hall were turned out and it was time for bed.

On his fourth night he lay awake in his dark cell, thinking about his wife and daughters and brother and everyone else he had left behind. He had no doubt that Jackson planned to do them all in very soon, but he had to hope that the nurse would follow through with her promise before it got too bad. He decided that if he saw her again and they had a moment of privacy, he would ask her to warn his family.

He fell into a fitful sleep that was peppered with images of Jackson Star standing over his loved ones, smiling as he sliced chunks of skin from their bodies.

Axl woke with a start when the lights flicked on. It was a harsh way to wake up and one he doubted he’d get used to any time soon.

Had this been Angus’s wake up call for the past twenty years?

He made himself get out of bed, dragging himself across the room to the couch. Still thinking about Angus and this room and the past twenty years.

His thoughts returned to the present when movement in the hallway caught his eye. He looked up to find a man struggling against three guards, trying to get away. He was a big guy, and young, probably only a couple years older than Megan. He looked as if he’d been taken by surprise because he wasn’t wearing a shirt and when Axl looked closer he saw that the guy’s feet were bare too. Tattoos covered his arms and back, dark black lines that crisscrossed one another, circling his biceps as they moved up and curled around his shoulders and continuing down to his waist.

Somehow, despite the fact that his hands were tied behind his back, he managed to break free, but he’d only taken two steps when one of the guards tackled him from behind. The prisoner slammed against the window of Axl’s cell, his face pressed against the glass. Axl sat frozen in place, watching from his position on the couch. The guy’s eyes were ice blue and they were so focused on him that he felt like he couldn’t move.

The man was jerked back a second later, but when his mouth moved, Axl found himself standing. The room was soundproof but he could have sworn that the guy yelled his name. Axl didn’t recognize him, though, and he felt certain he’d never seen him before in his life. So who was he? How did he know Axl?

He moved closer to the window as the guards shoved the guy in the cell across from him. A few seconds passed with Axl holding his breath. The guards retreated, shutting the door behind them, and a second later the man was on his feet and at the window. His icy blue eyes stared at Axl as if he’d seen a ghost. Somehow, Axl knew what the questions in his eyes meant and he found himself nodding. A look that was a mixture of relief and horror crossed the other man’s face.

He and Axl stared at each other for a while, but it wasn’t long before he grew tired of standing and returned to the couch. Whatever was going on, Axl had no doubt that Jackson was the one behind it. He also felt certain that the sadistic man wouldn’t leave them in suspense for long.

He was right, and before an hour had passed, Jackson showed up. When he appeared, the man in the other cell jumped to his feet, and the expression on his face mirrored how Axl felt. He stayed where he was, though, working to get his emotions under control so he didn’t lose it the way he had before.

Jackson stopped outside Axl’s cell and stared at him with a sick smile on his face that made all the others look innocent in comparison. He pushed the button on the intercom, breaking the barrier of silence separating them, but he didn’t speak. He just stood there, staring at Axl with an evil grin on his face. Goading him. Daring him to beg.

Axl didn’t want to give in, but the more seconds that ticked by, the more difficult he found it to remain silent. “Where are they?” he finally asked, hating himself for giving in. “Tell me.”

“On their way here.” Jackson’s smile grew. “Guards are at your apartment as we speak, and you’ll be reunited with your family soon.”

Jackson paused and turned to face the other cell, and Axl was shocked by the cold look in the other man’s eyes. Then the prick pushed the button on his cell as well.

But why? Who was this man and how was he connected to them? Axl had no idea, but he could tell by the threatening expression in his eyes that if they could somehow get free, this man would be an ally.

“As I was saying,” Jackson continued, “Meg and the rest of your family are on the way.”

The man in the other cell let out a growl and Axl studied him once again, but he couldn’t focus on him enough to figure out what was going on, not with the threat in Jackson’s words hanging over him.

“Don’t hurt her,” he said, his voice coming out hopeless.

“There’s no reason for you to be concerned,” Jackson replied. “I don’t intend to keep you in suspense. You’ll be able to witness the entire thing. Right here.” He stepped closer to Axl while shooting the other man a look. “You’ll be able to watch as I take her. I’ll let you hear her cries. Your family, her mother, will all be right there—” He motioned to the hall behind him. “—watching. I know how close your family is, and I wouldn’t want any of you to miss the show.”

Curses came from the cell at Jackson’s back before Axl could say a word, and the other man pounded his fists against the glass. “You son of a bitch! Don’t you touch her! I will rip you to pieces!”

Jackson grinned. “You aren’t exactly in the position to make threats.”

Axl felt broken, hopeless. He could do nothing and he had no doubt that Jackson was just sick enough to follow through with what he promised. In the other cell, the younger man seemed ready to explode, and Axl recognized the emotions on his face. He’d felt them, back in the beginning days of the zombie outbreak when he’d gone to Vegas to rescue Vivian from the Monte Carlo. He’d almost been too late, and just the thought of something happening to her had ripped him in two. The man across from him had that same expression on his face, only he was thinking of Megan.

The door at the end of the hall opened and guards headed toward Jackson.

“Where is she?” he growled, making the men stop in their tracks.

“The family was gone,” the guard at the front of the group said, staring at the floor like he was afraid to look Jackson in the eye. “We checked with the surveillance team. They left in the middle of the night, but there’s no mention of where they went and we haven’t been able to locate them anywhere.”

Axl watched as the sick glee in Jackson’s eyes melted away and was replaced by fury. His whole body was shaking, and right in front of Axl’s eyes, he seemed to transform into something else, something that was more monster than man. Axl found himself taking a step away from the window without knowing why. He had long suspected that Jackson had a twisted side to him, but seeing it with his own eyes was enough to knock the wind out of him.

He took another step away when Jackson practically lunged for the keypad outside his cell. A second later the door was thrown open and Jackson had charged inside. His eyes seemed to flash when he looked at Axl.

The first punch got him in the jaw, and the second in the eye. Axl fought back as best as he could while trying to block the hits that came at him one after the other in rapid speed. He managed to get the other man in the gut, and he thought he got him in the face once or twice, but he was still weak from the drugs and his brain wasn’t working as well as it usually did, not to mention the fact that Jackson was more than twenty years younger than he was.

It didn’t take long before Axl was on the ground with Jackson on top of him. The hits came so fast that he could do little more than raise his arms to cover his face, but even that didn’t help and he soon felt like nothing more than a ball of pain. His eyes throbbed so hard that he was sure they would swell shut, and pain radiated across his skull even when Jackson choose to focus his rage on other parts of Axl’s body. His sides ached and through the haze of pain surrounding him, Axl was able to gather his thoughts just enough to realize that at least one—if not more—of his ribs were broken.

Darkness closed in on him as Jackson’s fists slowed, and then stopped. There was yelling and Jackson was gone, but the pain wasn’t, and Axl ached so much that the black shadow that fell over him felt comforting in comparison. He wanted it to engulf him even though he was certain that if it did, he might never come back. Too bad he didn’t have the strength to fight it…

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I know you’ve been on the edge of your seat waiting for this book to come out, and the first thing I want to do is thank everyone who was patient and understanding. Typically, it doesn’t take this long for me to write a book, but between my move and getting settled into a new place with four kids, and the ups and downs with my husband’s job while trying (unsuccessfully) to sell our old house, I’ve been stressed, which makes it difficult to concentrate. This book, for whatever reason, refused to come out of me when I wanted it to, so I appreciate everyone who understands that my personal life and family trump their reading schedule. For those of you who didn’t leave reviews for Twisted World insinuating that their reading needs were so much more important than my personal life that it justified taking a star away from their rating, I really appreciate your support and continued excitement for this series. I hope that the completion of this book is a sign that things are finally getting back to normal in my life.

A very special thanks goes to my beta readers: Jan Strohecker, Mary Jones, and Jen Naumann. As always, your excitement to read the book, your willingness to search for typos, and your overall support is invaluable. Thank you!

Thanks to my husband who had to listen to me complain over and over again about how this book wasn’t coming together the way I wanted it to, and to my kids who had no problem making themselves sandwiches for dinner on the days when I was actually able to focus enough to get some work done. My family will always be my number one priority, but I’m lucky enough that they all understand how important writing is to me, and that they are both supportive and enthusiastic of my dream.

I sincerely hope everyone enjoyed this installment, but don’t worry because it isn’t the end. Yet. I will do my very best to get the next book out to you soon, but in the meantime, know that I’m always working.

OTHER BOOKS BY KATE L. MARY

The Broken World Series

Broken World

Shattered World

Mad World

Lost World

New World

Forgotten World

Silent World

Broken Stories

The Twisted Series

Twisted World

Twisted Mind

Zombie Apocalypse Love Story Novellas

More than Survival

Fighting for a Future

Playing the Odds

The Key to Survival

Collision

When We Were Human

Alone: A Zombie Novel

The Moonchild Series

Moonchild

Liberation

The College of Charleston Series

The List

No Regrets

Moving On

Letting Go

Anthologies

Prep for Doom

Gone with the Dead

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Kate L. Mary is an award-winning author of New Adult and Young Adult fiction, ranging from Post-apocalyptic tales of the undead, to Speculative Fiction and Contemporary Romance. Her Young Adult book, When We Were Human, was a 2015 Children’s Moonbeam Book Awards Silver Medal winner for  Young Adult Fantasy/Sci-Fi Fiction, and a 2016 Readers’ Favorite Gold Medal winner for Young Adult Science Fiction. Don’t miss out on the Broken World series, an Amazon bestseller and fan favorite. For more information about Kate, check out her website: www.KateLMary.com

Connect with Kate L. Mary online:

KateLMary.com

KateLMaryauthor@gmail.com

Table of Contents

Copyright

Dedication

Table of Contents

1. Angus James

2. Vivian

3. Jim

4. Dr. Helton

5. Joshua

6. Vivian

7. Dr. Helton

8. Axl

9. Dr. Helton

10. Angus James

11. Dr. Helton

12. Joshua

13. Axl

14. Dr. Helton

15. Jim

16. Dr. Helton

17. Dr. Helton

18. Helen

19. Dr. Jane Helton

20. Helen

21. Jane Helton

22. Jane

23. Angus James

24. Meg

25. Meg

26. Angus James

27. Axl

Acknowledgments

Other Books by Kate L. Mary

About the Author