Date: 2014-11-02 07:00:00+00:00
Description: High school life is almost over, but Hotan's life as an immortal has only just started... Already struggling with a mountain of hardships, Hotan is just trying to get his diploma as his mother had always insisted. Friends know if he's not at home or at the club playing in his band, you can always find him thinking at the old broken down church. Basking in the moonlight, Hotan finds himself under attack by an immortal named Geliah, the element of Fear. Talib, the element of Judgment, interrupts the fight, furious that Geliah would force Hotan to awaken his own abilities and immortality. Normall
Publisher: Createspace
Rights: All rights reserved (#2007549389497788)

Tattooed Angels Trilogy

Book One

Rebirth

A novel by

Valerie Willis

Copyright © 2002-2016 Valerie Willis

Published by Battle Goddess Productions
Cover Art & Design by Valerie Willis
Typesetting by Valerie Willis

All rights reserved.

PAPERBACK EDITION ISBNS
ISBN: 1467900338

ISBN-13: 978-1467900331

Smashwords Edition License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return to Smashwords.com or your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

DEDICATION

To my Great Grandmother who taught me the importance of having Faith.

And to Shannon Whitlock for making sure this story got the attention and love it needed.

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Book of Ancients: The Beginning

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Book of Ancients: Judgment

Chapter Eighteen

Book of Ancients: Rebirth

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

About the Author

Other Books

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

A big thank you to those who backed this project on Kickstarter. It was an amazing feeling to see so many jump in on the cause and it only made me push harder. That includes the following awesome people:

Secondly, another thank you to all my BETA readers who gave me so much of their time. Without them, this story would have been lacking some much needed love to get it off the ground completely.

Kay Kauffman for smacking me about and helping me clean up my mess! Love you and thank you!

More importantly, thank you to my Husband and Kids for giving me the chance to work on my Books.

Chapter One

His eyes struggled to adjust to the searing heat and blinding light. The intense white horizon was all he could make out; the desert landscape swallowed him. Silvery sand, bright skies, and waves of heat obscured everything that lay beyond where he stood.

Hotan’s ears pounded; his heartbeat deafened him. His chest ached as panic filled him.

It’s the dream again.

Frantic, he searched all around.

Where was he? He always comes for me. I never-

“HOTAN!”

His nerves felt as though they were unraveling in his joints. Turning, his gaze fell on a disrupted blackened figure approaching him. It vibrated and wiggled as it advanced, as if this single element of his dream had poor reception. He could never make out who this man or demon was, yet he knew him instinctively.

Not again… That voice and the aura… I know him. I know that I know him, but… why do I also feel as if I have never met him?

“Hotan! I shall take my revenge.” The animosity in the voice gripped Hotan’s soul.

“Revenge?” His mind flooded with questions as it attempted to decipher the familiar voice. “Who are you? Why do I feel like I should know you?”

“You know what blood runs in our hearts! This will be the last time you hide from me. The last time you will hide from what you have done!” A long sword appeared out of the wavering blackness. Unlike the man who held it, this element of the dream was clear as it reflected the blinding sun down upon him like a spotlight shining on its kill. “I wish to thank you for my tortured life for all these centuries! I’ll send you to a lonely darkness equal to the one you gave me!”

Hotan felt his heels scrape against something hard and fell backwards. No matter how many times he changed his direction, he always fell back into the emptiness of this place. The blade rose high, racing at him with astonishing speed. Its edge ripped across his arms, and once more, he released a blood-curdling scream. The fuzzy black shadow laughed the same maddening laugh he’d heard a million times. Wild eyes and a wide grin became clear on the shadow’s vibrating face which was covered with splatters of Hotan’s blood. Wet crimson astounded him as he felt the coldness of his oncoming death. Darkness hid the blinding landscape and all he could feel was the thud-

“Hotan!” Pushing her glasses back on her nose, the haughty teacher snorted in his direction. He jerked his head up off his desk, breathing hard after his nightmare. Sweat covered his face.

“I would appreciate it if you stayed awake during my class.” Scoffing, she turned back to the blackboard to continue the math lesson on sine versus cosine.

“Feh.” Rubbing the sweat off his forehead, he ignored the warning.

Of all places to fall asleep…

“Psst. Are you okay?” Wide-eyed, the light-haired girl in the desk next to him leaned closer. “You’re looking rather pale today. Are you sick?”

“I’m fine.” Annoyed that she had noticed how distraught he was, he cracked his neck before glaring out the window.

Great, now everyone thinks there is something else wrong with me.

Seeing that he was not in the mood to talk, the girl returned to her notes. It was not uncommon for him to be unsociable to his classmates. He spent most of his time in class looking out windows, waiting for the bell to ring. Despite the lack of focus, he was passing his courses without any difficulties.

Hotan watched a gym class finish its last round of a basketball game. The view from the second-story window was nice and the perfect escape from his math teacher’s monotonous lecture. As the last of the kids disappeared from sight, he shifted his focus to a pair of mourning doves sitting on the tennis court fence. A few more landed next to them, joining the line as the morning sun rose higher in the sky. The sun warmed his face as it pushed through the glass, a comforting sensation compared to the echoes of cold that still rattled him.

Strange that the birds should be so clear to him, so distinct from the rest of the gray landscape. Though he had been born completely color blind, there were occasionally strange moments where an object would appear in color. Despite having never seen colors before, he knew their names and how to describe them. One doctor had labeled him as a classic case of cerebral achromatopsia, some fancy term that means he does see colors since he describes the world around him in shades of gray.

The doctor pointed out that the truly color blind have no recognition of what gray is. It didn’t matter; he couldn’t tell you what color anyone around him wore, let alone the school’s colors. Then again, he had other things to focus on than school pride. Screw team spirit.

Who was that man?

His thoughts reeled as the sounds of the classroom faded. Closing his eyes, the dark figure reappeared in his mind; it was the same dream over and over again.

This year has been the worst. It was hitting me once a month. Now I am falling asleep in class and having the dream. What does it mean? It must mean something…

“Class dismissed!” The teacher cleared her throat as students rushed the door. “Hotan Samuels, I need to speak with you.”

Grabbing his book bag, Hotan met her at her desk as the last student departed, leaving them alone. “Yes, Mrs. Bothirsen? Is there a problem?”

“Hotan…” She paused, waiting for the door to click shut before returning her gaze to him. “I know you are passing the exams with straight A’s, but please, stay awake in my class. Just because you’re smarter than the other students, it doesn’t mean you get special privileges and it doesn’t mean you can nap in class. You’ll never pass if you continue to just sit here staring out the window. You need to start participating.”

“Sorry- I haven’t been sleeping well.” He turned away, his face blank as he headed for the hall with no reaction on his face. Stopping a few steps short of the door, he glared back at her. She opened her mouth to speak, but he interrupted her. “Plus, who said I had special privileges? If that was the case, I wouldn’t even bother showing up.” Smirking, he glided out of the door, leaving her speechless.

The hallways undulated before him, a churning of greys like that of boiling water in a silver pot. He kept his head low; his silver bangs aided his efforts to ignore unwanted eye contact, especially after the debacle in math class. He just wanted to finish this last year of high school and move on with his life.

Unlike the kids surrounding him, he had no choice but to grow up. Memories of his mom made him bite his cheek as he continued the silent march down the stairs to the first floor.

I am here because I promised her I would graduate high school.

He sighed, passing through the mayhem like a phantom in a cemetery. The students around him seemed to fall silent as he lost himself to sour thoughts and memories. Unlike the panicked kids rushing past him, he felt no urgency to get out of the school.

He paused in front of his locker. Tossing the math book on top of the stack, he huffed to himself. He smirked as he shut the door on the pile of textbooks. He hadn’t opened any of them, yet he was passing with straight A’s. Information came to him as if he had studied them in a past life and the knowledge had never left his soul. Carrying the books to his classes had been a way to show his teachers his respect for the material and to appear less intimidating to other students. At least bringing a book appeared as if he studied.

“Hey there…” The deep voice rang in Hotan’s ears. Chills ran across the back of his neck as if Death himself had whispered the words. “I heard you were looking for me?”

“Hisota.” Hotan turned and shoved the skinny, dark eyed boy. “You haven’t been to band practice. Are you going to play at the club tonight? Or are you finally quitting?”

With a coy smile, Hisota flicked his long, black ponytail off his shoulders. After a moment, he shrugged, increasing Hotan’s ire.

“I need to know.” Hotan had a hard time considering Hisota a friend at the moment. They had met back in elementary school, and Hisota had followed him ever since. “Cut the crap, Hisota. Are you leaving the band, yes or no?”

“If I say no, are you going to bully me into going tonight? Or would you prefer I say yes so your cheerleader-wannabe girlfriend can take my place?” Twisting his face into a vinegary look, it was clear Hisota had a jealous streak when it came to Hotan’s relationship. “I hope you know pretty girls like that look like whores on grungy rocker boys like you. She’s not-”

Hisota yelped as Hotan gripped him by the shirt and slammed him into the lockers. “Leave her out of this! Everyone knows you’re jealous of her- knock it off and grow up already!”

“Don’t flatter yourself.” Hisota jerked out of Hotan’s grip and stomped off into the wall of eyes.

Ignoring the chatter and giggles, Hotan pushed his way out the front doors of the old brick school. Aggravated, he tuned out the world and people around him as he made his way past the bus loop, pacing silently down the sidewalk. He stopped suddenly about a block down from the school; a strangely shaped shadow caught his attention and he looked up to see an old, broken church.

Chapter Two

The church reminded him of the St. Patrick’s Cathedral in New York City, only with half the size and fewer embellishments. All he knew for sure about the place was it was built near the end of the American colonial period and it had been abandoned for longer than anyone could remember. Not even his mother could recall how long it had been sitting on its weedy throne.

Despite the church’s small stature, it still towered over the quaint neighborhood just as it had since its completion. The modern homes neighboring it left the old monument stuck in a past no one wanted to remember. Regardless of its battered appearance, it was a solid piece of architecture and it was the perfect place to be alone.

He couldn’t remember what it was that brought him here so long ago, but the peace he felt when he walked through its rotting wooden doors had been refreshing. Slipping past the one working door, he stepped inside the dust-covered wreck. The church had once housed several angelic statues, but time and neglect had crumbled most of them. Two stone guardians near the front had broken limbs, wings, and faces. Remnants of wooden pews scattered the floor. Behind the podium, in front of a shattered stained glass window, lay a crippled wooden cross in a bed of rubble, having failed to uphold the savior it had once supported so proudly.

This place would have been a sight to see in its prime. Only the finest materials had been utilized: fragments of marble, splinters of dark cedar. Hints of silver were also evident in the little bit of décor that remained intact. What had once been a virtuous white now lay in filth, grayed by dust. That decay added to the musky scent the air held.

Amid the wreckage, there remained a few places one could sit, and Hotan would spend hours there, lost in thought.

This is my place.

The neighbors questioned his coming and going from the church. No “For Sale” signs had ever graced the lot in the time since he’d first noticed it and, oddly, no one he’d ever asked knew who owned the property.

As he sat on the pew, staring at the broken gray world around him, he felt his muscles loosen. Leaving behind the conflicts of the day, he steadied his mind and his emotions, inhaling the pungent smell of the decaying church and finding harmony within it. After several minutes, he sighed and walked back out the front doors. He pulled a cloth tarp off something large, exposing the motorcycle he had parked off to the side. A blue-flamed Suzuki Hayabusa glimmered in the afternoon sunlight.

The school had thrown a tantrum when he attempted to register it as his senior year transportation. They revoked his parking permit at the very idea of such a thing, so he resorted to parking it here. Pulling on his helmet, he started the bike, gassing it soft so as not to disturb such a peaceful place. The moment the back tire hit the asphalt, he opened up the throttle and roared towards the waiting city.

Shellie gripped his waist in a firm hug as they pulled off the busy downtown street. The front tire splashed through the puddles littering the back alleyway. He had picked her up on his way to the club, fearing that Hisota’s confrontation at school was his way of telling Hotan that he was going to be a no show again. The bike leaned heavily against the kickstand as he waited for Shellie to climb off. He pulled off the full-face helmet, huffing as he shook out his hair. Looking over the parking lot, he saw no signs of Hisota’s bike.

Hotan bit his tongue as he dismounted his own bike, stomping past Shellie and through the back door of the club. Anger crawled across his shoulders as he tensed and threw his helmet at the lockers. The noise was thunderous; he had everyone’s attention.

“It’s ok; you know I’m perfectly fine with playing bass.” Shellie gave him her best smile. “We all figured he wasn’t coming after what happened at school.”

“It still pisses me off that he doesn’t take this as seriously as the rest of us.” Hotan looked at her with mournful eyes. “I can’t just replace him easily, either. The drama he’d create gives me headaches just thinking about it. All I can think is he’s going through some stuff, and he wants to do it alone. Just wish one of us knew what the hell has him so worked over.”

“Hotan, he’ll get over it just give him a few more weeks.” Kyle, Hotan’s best friend, flipped a drumstick in the air. “We’ve got Shellie till he gets his act together. The last thing we need is for him to pull his power card in here. But, I wouldn’t stop you from pounding his face in if it came to blows.”

“And whose face are we pounding in?” Chaz, the owner of the club 7even, had entered the room. He towered over the teens and grinned as he puffed on his cigar. “Still on for tonight, kids?”

There was a long pause as Hotan stared at Shellie and Kyle. They both nodded reassuringly. He looked back to Chaz.

“We’re still on. Guess it’s another night of me singing if you don’t mind.” Sighing, Hotan picked up his electric guitar and flopped down on the bench to tune it. “We’ll be out soon as we’re all tuned. I’ll let you know when to announce us.”

“Fine with me.” The cigar smoke billowed out of Chaz’s lips as he walked back the way he’d come in.

It was a typical Wednesday night with smokers filling in the bar top and a few of them scattered between some of the tables. The band didn’t always play on a slow night, but it was a chance to make extra cash when it came to Hotan’s concerns. Unlike his fellow band members, he didn’t have the luxury of living at home with Mom and Dad anymore.

Hisota was putting his livelihood at risk every time he threw one of his tantrums. But refusing to show up was his power card. Hotan eyed both Shellie and Kyle from his spot on stage. They were ready.

“Good evening everyone.” Hotan’s voice was smooth and solid as he spoke to the crowd sitting silently just beyond the stage. “We’re going to start with my personal favorite cover, TOOL’s Laterlus.”

As he picked the starting melody out, he let his frustration melt away. Playing music and reminiscing in the church seemed to be the only times he found some sort of peace within himself. He felt like a real person instead of a constantly churning bundle of questions related to every facet of his existence. Every element of his life was broken or worse, lost forever.

Why would the world aim to destroy a person so much without some purpose or meaning behind it?

Perhaps he was overthinking this, but he had a nagging feeling that there was so much more he didn’t know, and it was all there somewhere, just waiting to be discovered. The dream, his knowledge, and his instincts drove him to keep going, to find the reason why his life seemed cursed from the start. Despite everything, he’d made it this far. He was determined to find the answers he sought, no matter what.

When he dropped Shellie off, he held her chin and kissed her, slowly and tenderly. She was one of the very few people he trusted enough to share his feelings with, but there was still much that he kept to himself. He put his helmet back on and waited for her to close the front door before leaving the sleepy suburban neighborhood. The cool night air comforted him as he made his way down streets and highways. Going home was not an option just yet; he needed time to think. The day’s events weighed heavily on his mind; he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight. He found himself once more in front of the church as it sat in the shadow of the night.

He picked his way carefully through the trash and debris, awed by the beams of light that sparkled in the hallowed space. Odd shapes and shades of grey were scattered across the dust covered ruins. He sat in one of the pews, drinking in the stale musky air. The wooden seat creaked and moaned as he shifted his weight. Closing his eyes, it felt as if time had paused to take a breath with him. Nothing seemed urgent or pressing; instead, it seemed he had all of eternity to resolve his problems.

“I’ve been waiting for you, Hotan.”

Hotan’s eyes widened as fear knocked the air from his chest. Flashes of his nightmare came to him; he replayed dozens, no thousands of deaths. He wanted to run, but he couldn’t bring himself to blink or even take a breath.

“And here you are, right on time. You’ve walked right into the lion’s den.”

The dream has come true!

Jolting up from his seat, Hotan looked back at the entrance and met the wild glare of a large man. His voice failed him, his muscles locked him in place. Panic flooded into him as his gaze took in every detail of the man.

The broad-shouldered stranger had the bulk of a heavyweight fighter. Dreadlocks framed a maddening grin. He blocked the only exit Hotan knew of: This place of security had broken its oath to him; now it surrounded Hotan like a coffin.

A cold sweat dripped down Hotan’s temple as he watched the predator stalk its prey. Laughter boiled out of the beast-sized man as he drew closer. Hotan’s heart fluttered as his nightmare unfolded.

This can’t be real. This can’t be happening!

“I’ve searched for you for centuries. Now I can finally repay you for the hell you’ve put me through!” The man pulled out a large machete and swung it through the air, slicing the remnants of a marble statue with breathtaking rage. “I can finally take you down and end the curse with which you imprisoned my soul!”

“Who are you?” It was more of a desperate scream than a question. Hotan stumbled back, away from the stranger. But his heel slammed into a piece of marble and he toppled over backwards, filling the air with clouds of decades-old dust “How-how do you know my name?”

Am I really going to die here? Is this the end? I don’t want to die! Not like this, not without something good happening in my life first!

“Eh?” The man paused, dropping his machete slightly as his smile faded. “You don’t remember me?”

Panting, Hotan could only give the man a bewildered, terrified expression.

“Oh, that’s just peachy!” A devilish grin crawled across his face as a cruel, deep laugh spilled forth. “You won’t even put up a fight- your own spell will be the thorn in your side! Karma’s a bitch.”

“Please, I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Hotan shrieked, but the stranger laughed harder. “You must have the wrong person!”

Someone! Please help me!

“No, you wouldn’t know what I’m talking about.” He stepped closer to Hotan, towering above him like Death, his blade held high. “You haven’t awakened at all! Must be my lucky day. The fear pouring out of you is so sweet; I could drink from it all night.”

All Hotan could do was plead with the zealot, “Please! I don’t know what you’re talking about?”

“Hmm, where to cut you first?” The stranger ignored his outcry, smiling as he mused on, “Maybe I should start with your fingers and slowly work my way up the arms, what do you think, Hotan?”

Hotan’s eyes widened and his body felt like it was on fire. An intense heat filled him, spreading outward from his core. His terror shifted slowly into anger as he looked up into the eyes of his would-be killer. Body, mind, and soul felt unexpectedly complete, despite the warmth emanating from deep inside. Flames wafted up from a deep unknown. As it grew, he felt part of himself set to the side, ripping him from his moment of completeness. Someone else had taken the reigns.

Flecks of color began to appear as he glared into Geliah’s amber eyes. The sudden release of power had changed Hotan somehow. “Back off, Geliah. I will defend myself if you do not cease this nonsense.”

What is happening? Who else is here with me- who is speaking for me? This isn’t me. I don’t understand…

“You always were the party pooper, Hotan.” Sighing, Geliah’s wild grin vanished as he stepped back and allowed Hotan to stand. “This can’t be healthy for you. The fear I felt a moment ago was not yours- why endanger an innocent? Doesn’t seem like your style. What would your big brother have to say about-”

“Silence!” Hotan’s eyes had shifted to bright green, and black lines snaked across his body.

“Bah!” Geliah’s skin reacted in a similar manner, like a chameleon changing its skin “No offense, but I should have never been able to break that spell of yours.”

“Do not question matters beyond your comprehension.” Hotan’s jaw muscles twitched as he spoke, “My soul slumbers within this new body, for it has no place in this world anymore. You should have stayed asleep, Geliah of Fear.”

“You want me to tell you why your spell fell apart?” A wicked grin came across his face as he brushed back his dreadlocks.

Blue flames rose from Hotan’s skin as he glared at Geliah. “I am reborn. I no longer exist. Only my essence remains.”

“That’s all that’s left.” Geliah scoffed in disappointment. “I was hoping for a good fight.”

What are they talking about? This has to be another dream- I have to wake up!

“I would gladly give up the last of my life to save this child from my past mistakes.” Geliah ignored the heat of Hotan’s glare.

“A shame you feel that way. Let me end this last piece of you then!” Geliah gave a primal scream as he swung the machete. “Now die!”

“Stop!” Hotan’s voice echoed throughout the church as he caught the blade with bare hand. Glowering at Geliah, he tightened his grip on the blade.

Paling, Geliah had not expected him to catch it barehanded and unscathed. He took a step back, fearful of a counterattack.

The blue flames painting Hotan’s skin rose higher as rage filled his green eyes. The sword rusted and crumbled to the floor, leaving no mark on the hand with which he’d caught the blade’s edge. A massive flash exploded from Hotan, blowing Geliah off his feet. The shock wave pushed him across the marble floor and pinned him against the wooden doors. Another wave pulsed out, and as it touched the ruins of the church, it seemed as if a miracle was happening.

Missing marble materialized, its shine intact. Old woodcarvings appeared as if recently finished. Angelic statues held their once missing shields in newfound limbs with pride. As the wave rolled across, it returned the church to the peak of its glory. The pulse of power receded, leaving the final repairs doused in blue flames.

Did that come from me or the other Hotan? How is this possible? This can’t be real. It can’t be!

Behind Hotan, Geliah watched as the stained glass window pulled itself back together. A large wooden cross rose again to its rightful place. The statue nailed to the wooden cross stared down at the two of them, passing judgment. They stared at one another as they convened in the unbroken cathedral. The sanctuary glowed in its newfound splendor as moonlight scattered the window’s many colors around the room. Geliah growled as he stood.

“Is that it? What a wasted display of power!” He snickered. “I didn’t come here to watch parlor tricks!”

“Geliah!” A new voice called from the front of the church.

Its owner was a tall, thin man with silver hair in a white business suit. His silver eyes held Geliah and Hotan in place as he walked towards them.

Another one? Where are these people coming from?

The new stranger cleared his throat. “You know what you are doing is forbidden. Did I not warn you that there would be consequences for such actions? Did I not tell you never to force awakening on anyone else?”

“Oh look, it’s the Vulture of Judgment.” Geliah’s jaw visibly clenched. “We both know you can’t pull power on me like before, Talib. Go pass your judgment someplace else.”

“I wish to make you an offer.” Talib straightened his tie a moment before glancing back at Hotan. He nodded. “You are looking for a good fight and the ability to settle a score. I will give you the chance to do that, but under my terms.”

It’s as if he knows what the offer will be. But who are these people? Why am I not in control of my body? This is all so surreal.

“You’ve got my attention.” Geliah raised an eyebrow. “What sort of a deal did you have in mind?”

“Give me one year to prep the young boy. If you kill him, you get what you desire, wiping all traces of Hotan off the earth. If you fail to kill him or if you break our deal, there will be a devastating punishment in store for you.”

Geliah considered the proposal- It certainly had its benefits. After a long moment of silence, he grunted.

Talib cocked his head. “Is this not what you want? A chance to kill Hotan without interruption?”

“Fine, it’s a deal.” Without further confrontation, Geliah slipped out of the newly repaired doors of the church.

ONE YEAR? TO FIGHT THAT? WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!

“Thank you, alef chet…” Hotan felt the thud of his body hitting the cold marble floor as darkness took him away.

Chapter Three

At first, the muffled sounds in Hotan’s ears came in the form of a tunneled shout down the longest hallway ever. There was no sense of time as he strained to focus on the words. Whoever it was, it sounded urgent and horrifyingly desperate. Shivering, the coldness his body felt did nothing to pull him from the frozen darkness he sat in. Something warm and wet hit his cheek.

Wiping it off his face, he opened his eyes, looking at the clear liquid in confusion. He rolled it between his fingers fascinated by it. More started to hit his face, like tears falling from invisible eyes. The voice had stopped yelling its words and simply sobbed. If these were not his tears, than whom did they belong to?

Who is crying? Why are they crying? What does that have to do with me? There’s no reason to cry over someone like me…

“HOTAN!” His heart skipped a beat when he heard the voice loud and clear. “Please! Wake up, Hotan!”

Shellie!

He struggled to gain the strength, still tangled in his dreamlike state; he tore himself from the pitch-black prison to truly open his eyes. As his vision regained its focus, he stared into the brightest green eyes. For the first time, he was seeing her eyes and face in full color. The emerald green of Shellie’s irises was phenomenal. They held small specks of gold that added to the rich earth tone of the green, but the tears falling from her flushed face made his heart ache. “Shellie?”

“Hotan! You’re awake! He’s awake!” She hugged him tight as her tears rained down on him. “What happened to you? I thought you were dead! You were so cold when I found you and I… Did someone do this to you? What happened?”

Attempting to sit up, the cathedral tilted and spun around Hotan as an agonizing pain filled his head. Looking back to Shellie’s distraught face, he watched as the colors melted away. The rosy peach tone of her skin, the natural pinkness of her lips; it was all fading away. His miracle had come and gone so quickly that he felt a throbbing in his chest. He opened his mouth to say something, but the words were lost in his sorrow. “I…”

“The ambulance should be here shortly, Shellie!” Kyle was shouting as he walked into the cathedral with Hisota close behind him. “Oh man, what a relief! He’s awake!”

“Jesus, he looks pale.” The surprised expression on Hisota’s face let Hotan know how bad his current state looked. “What in the hell were you doing?”

With the help of his friends, Hotan managed to sit down on a pew. His head was still spinning as he struggled to remember how he got there. Another wave of shivering crawled across his skin as the sounds of distant sirens drew near. It took all he had to focus his thoughts, but all he remembered was leaving Shellie’s house.

Looking up past his friends, he looked around, puzzled. “Where am I?”

“The church by the school… You don’t remember where you are?” Shellie’s words lingered in his thoughts as his stomach twisted into knots. They all looked at one another, concern increasing on their faces. Shellie continued, “You come here all the time, Hotan…”

The church? The broken place I come to all the time? Where I come to think? When… but this can’t be the same place? I must be dreaming…

“The… church?” Hotan’s eyes scanned over the clean bright marble, the unbroken stain glass window, and lastly, the breathtaking Crucifix statue on a wooden cross behind the podium. “But, this can’t be…”

When did someone renovate this place?

“How long have I been missing?” A surge of panic was flooding his mind as cold sweat raced down his back. “This isn’t how I remember it! This can’t be the same place! How long was I missing?”

“Well, I last saw you when you dropped me off last night.” Shellie sat next to him as he looked at her, baffled. “You seemed fine when you left.”

“When you weren’t at school, we were all really confused.” Kyle rubbed the back of his neck a moment. “So when none of us had heard from you today, we got worried and decided to look for you after school ended.”

“No offense, but in all the years I’ve known you, you’ve never called in sick.” Hisota huffed as the church doors opened and the paramedics rushed in. “Anyway, let’s have the experts take a look at you.”

Hotan struggled to concentrate on the questions the paramedics were asking him as they went about their work. The pressure of the cuff on his arm, the prick of the IV, and the forceful shove of the thermometer did nothing to disrupt his befuddled gaze. He was trying to take in every detail of the church in its current state.

This was the peak of the cathedral’s prime. The wood braces on the roof were each intricately placed and held unique carved scenes. The cedar pews were vibrant even through his grey-colored world. The shiny embellishments made each seat feel like a throne, confirming what he had speculated about the decor.

A gurney rolled in and with the help of the paramedics, he laid down on the rolling bed. Staring at the roof as they rolled him out, he witnessed not one cobweb on that ceiling. From his last memories, the rafters had barely been visible through the filth and spider webs.

The sunlight was blinding as he made his way to the ambulance. Squinting his eyes from the stinging white light, he continued to answer questions and reply to the information they were giving him. Nothing that he could remember was assisting the paramedics in figuring out what had happened to him either. Hotan’s body ached, his head pounded, and worse off, he felt sick to his stomach.

What happened to me?

No memories or hints would present themselves to him. Frustrated he turned his focus on what was currently going on in the ambulance as it sped towards the hospital.

“So, where have you been this last week?” Hisota was leaning against Hotan’s locker as he approached. “You couldn’t call me and update me on how you were doing? I had to get my info from Kyle, or worse, Shellie the last several days.”

“Recovering.” Hotan twisted his mouth as he nodded for Hisota to move out of the way. “I heard you actually made it to the club over the weekend. What brought on that change of heart?”

“I’m not that big of a dick.” A smirk crawled across Hisota’s face as Hotan slammed his locker closed. “I know that’s your livelihood, and you’re going to need the money to pay the hospital bills, right?”

“Don’t remind me.” He glared at Hisota, trying to figure out what new angle he was trying to pull. “Does this mean you can play at the club as long as I’m not there?”

“Maybe.” Hisota raised an eyebrow as he lost his smile. “At least your girl is a half decent bassist, and Chaz had one of his guys play the guitar in your place. You’re welcome.”

“I’m not in the mood for this.” Breaking eye contact with Hisota, he stared into the bustling hallway of students.

I still don’t feel like myself. Last thing I need is to let my temper loose…

Sighing, Hotan bumped shoulders with Hisota as he passed. He disappeared into the crowded hallway, leaving Hisota standing at the lockers alone.

“HEY!” Kyle was bulldozing his way from the other direction. “HISOTA!”

“And here comes his majesty’s dog.” Hisota huffed under his breath as Kyle stopped, panting in front of him. “What on earth do you want?”

“I, I was wondering if Hotan made it back to school?” Finally catching his breath, Kyle stood up straight. “My classes are way on the other end and I was trying to catch him.”

“Unfortunately, yes.” Nodding down the hallway, he replied, “But he’s already headed to his next class. You’ll be able to catch him after school.”

“Oh, thanks! Well I had better run back before I’m late to class again.” Kyle started to run down the hall, until he knocked books out of a girl’s hands. “Oops! So sorry, here let me help you!”

Hotan stopped in front of the cathedral. Its outer walls were just as clean and bright as the inside had been the last time he had been there. He had kept his distance from the church, needing to build up his courage. Whatever happened that night, it left an unnerving sensation with no memory and a place he did not recognize anymore. A jogging duo of women passed him by, both commenting on the beautiful church.

Sighing, he felt exposed in what once had been his sanctuary from the world. No longer the invisible fortress where he could be alone, it stood out among the homes around it and shouted its existence. Taking a deep breath, Hotan stood there with his hand against the new wooden doors. Calming his nerves, he walked inside.

Maybe coming here will help me remember what happened that night. I feel like a piece of me is missing, and my body still gets waves of shivers. The doctors insist its severe dehydration. I can’t shake the feeling that they are so wrong…

Walking down the aisle, he looked at the miraculous renovations. It was as if the church had been reborn as he looked down at his own reflection in the marble floors. A surreal sensation grew with every glance he made as he paused in front of the podium. The crucifix was powerful as it hung in front of the rows of pews. It demanded attention to the front of the church and the feelings it invoked were amazing. Hotan’s eyes took in every detail as he observed the battered look of the cross.

The granite statue painfully nailed to the wood stared down at him with a mournful expression. He admired the adaptation of the large granite wings that cast a shadow across the pews through the light of the stained glass window. The statue would have seemed almost free with the wings spread so wide, if it hadn’t been tied down with that earthly possession. Shifting his attention, he could hear a trickling sound. In the back right corner, a fountain of holy water flowed from what he assumed was a natural underground spring. Walking over to it, he looked into his own face in the shimmering reflection.

Do I look that sad? Maybe the statue and I have a lot in common. We just want to be free, but we’re both being forced back to the ground.

“Hey!” He jerked at the sudden sound of Kyle’s voice. “I was hoping to catch you at school since Hisota said you were there today. How are ya feeling? You need help with anything?”

“I’m fine.” Hotan took in a deep breath as he broke eye contact with his wavering reflection in the fountain. “So what brings you to the church?”

“Figured you would come here, you know, fall back into routine. You’ve been extra quiet, lately. I mean you’re the strong silent type, but this is sort of scary silence stuff, ya know?” They both started walking back down the aisle towards the front doors. “Plus, I wasn’t sure if I would find you passed out on the floor again.”

“I should be fine.” They paused a moment as Hotan looked Kyle in the eyes, taking a firm grip of his friend’s shoulder as a sign of reassurance. “They said I was super dehydrated. Most likely, a result of all the stress and not getting enough sleep lately. I’ll take better care of myself, since none of us really want a repeat of this debacle.”

“Definitely man... well, guess you know I’m there for ya.” Kyle sighed. “Did Shellie catch a ride with her girlfriends today?”

“Yea, I think they were going to go study.” Hotan rubbed his jaw a moment as they walked outside. “I feel bad, they were asking me to help them with Calculus homework. I may be a genius, but I lack the patience to teach others. It’s so hard for me to pitch it in a more dumbed down version, since it makes perfect sense to me when I look at the stuff.”

“I think Shellie understands.” Kyle started laughing as he watched Hotan straddle his motorcycle and strap on his helmet. “Plus, that one time you tried to help me it was a disaster. You have a short temper when it comes to tutoring. Well, that and Hisota.”

“Tell me about it,” he muttered, starting the bike.

Hotan waved good-bye to Kyle before racing down the street. As he zoned into the drive home, passing through the endless rows of houses and subdivisions, he started recalling the first time he met Shellie:

It was the first day of high school, and the freshman were all getting their fair share of harassment by the upper classmen. As usual, he had kept a low profile and cold-shouldered all the encounters thrown at him. The day was nearing a close as he walked to his locker for one last book exchange. Turning the corner, he found himself walking into a scene of two jocks pinning a girl against her locker. Their grins and expressions were clear that they weren’t going anywhere until they got what they wanted from her. That girl was Shellie.

“C’mon, sweetheart. Why wouldn’t a freshman like you want to go on a date with one of the senior football players?” His grin was faltering at this point, showing his frustration with her refusals.

They had been at this for some time before Hotan had come across them. He went unnoticed as they continued harassing Shellie, “Think of how popular you’ll be when everyone finds out we are dating?”

“Get over yourself.” Shellie tried to push through the two jocks, but a tight grip on her arm shoved her back against the lockers. “Ow! Let go, you’re hurting me!”

“Darian doesn’t just ask any girl out, you know?” His friend scoffed at her, “And no girl has ever turned down the chance to date my friend here.”

“Well consider me the first.” She pulled her curly short hair away from her mouth as she jerked her arm away from him. “If you don’t mind, I was aiming to be on time to all my classes today.”

“I don’t think so, doll.” Darian pushed her yet again into the lockers, his smile was long gone as she continued to rebel. “You’re not going anywhere until you tell me yes.”

“Are you kidding me?” Her face paled as she realized this was starting to push deeper than just freshman bullying. “You can’t go around forcing girls to be with you! That’s messed up!”

“I’ll do what I want, when I want.” He placed his hand on her hip and she slapped it away. “I dare you to do that again.”

Sweat ran down the side of Shellie’s cheek as she swallowed back her fears. Darian was massive, twice her size. His short dark hair and dark eyes only added to his menacing demeanor. She glared at his companion, a slightly lighter haired boy with light colored eyes who started to shift nervously. It was becoming clear that this was getting too aggressive even for him. Once more, Darian placed his hand on her hip. She grimaced as she aimed to slap his hand away again, fearing he would hit her for the action. Her hand missed, but his hand was gone.

“What the hell?” Darian roared as Hotan tightened his grip on his wrist. “Who do you think you are?”

“It doesn’t matter.” Hotan’s voice was calm and solid, as always. “Are you ok?”

Shellie stood in silence as she looked from Darian’s face of rage to the stern expressionless face of Hotan. “I, yea, now I am.”

“Let go of me! Mikey, get him off of me!” Hotan had worked Darian’s arm behind him. Twisting it in a way that Darian couldn’t break free without some sort of pain prevented any struggling. “I’m going to kill you for this!”

“Man, I didn’t sign up for this shit.” And with that, his accomplice rushed away, leaving the two boys and the frightened Shellie alone. “Fight your own battles, Darian.”

“Now, apologize.” Hotan tugged at Darian’s arm, sending an excruciating pain to his shoulder. “Apologize and promise you’ll never touch her again.”

“What if I refuse?” Darian tried laughing through his discomfort as he gave Shellie a baleful glare. “You going to hold me here forever?”

“That was your plan.” A smirk crawled across Hotan’s face. “Tell her sorry and promise to leave her alone, Darian. You’re not going anywhere until you tell her.”

“Go screw yours-” Hotan slammed him into the lockers next to Shellie, causing her to squeal as she continued to stand there in her shock. “Dammit!”

“If you keep telling me no, I’ll make sure you’ll be kissing your football career good bye before ever kissing another girl.” Hotan’s words stung at Darian’s ego as his shoulder throbbed and he stared at Shellie’s wide eyes. “Now, let’s try this one last time. Tell her you’re sorry and promise to leave her alone.”

After a moment Darian sighed, looking Shellie in the eyes and spoke, “I’m sorry. It will never happen again.” Hotan shoved him harder against the lockers. “I promise! I’ll never mess with her again! I’m sorry! Now let me go!”

Darian slid to the floor on his knees, rubbing his shoulder as he gave Hotan a sour look. Ignoring him, Hotan turned his attention to Shellie who still seemed stunned and confused. Rubbing the back of his neck, he finally looked her in the eyes, catching her attention.

“Do you need me to walk you to the administration office? Nurse’s office? Class?” Mustering a sincere smile, he waited for her decision. “It’s up to you. I can just leave you here, but I won’t do that until I know you’re ok first.”

“I, I think I’ll…” She watched as Darian finally stood up and walked away. He was still holding his shoulder, his face red with anger. Hotan had left a lasting message and Darian would not be bothering her anymore. “I don’t want to go to class or go home…”

“Ok, that’s a start.” He took a moment to read her baffled expression and body language. “I’ll tell you what, how about we go for a walk off campus? I’ll be sure to get you back in time for the buses. I like to go to the old church around the corner to clear my thoughts. Maybe some place safe like that might help you relax?”

Looking him in the eyes, she weighed her options for a moment before responding, “I would like that.”

By the time they made it back to the school, he had Shellie laughing and giggling. She was a happy person by nature and it was a relief to see he was able to snap her out of her shock. It felt so strange to feel the warmth of her arms around him as she hugged him good-bye. He hadn’t expected it and took a minute before he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her back.

Once more, she threw him off guard as her lips softly kissed his cheek. She left him behind as she boarded her bus and it pulled away. He found himself standing there admiring the moment, surprised at how much his own heart fluttered over those tiny gestures. The next day at school, he found Darian avoiding any hallway he was walking down and Shellie hanging on his arm.

It was not his intention to steal the girl away with an heroic act. At the same time, he couldn’t let something happen to anyone like he saw going down. No matter how many times he opened his mouth to say no, he lost the will to do so with each smile and stare they exchanged.

He had plenty of girls that passed him notes asking if he had a girlfriend or that a friend of theirs had a crush on him. The hearts he had broken every time he threw one of those letters in the trash grew every year. Perhaps it was time to let someone through the door.

He admired her courage against Darian. Most girls would have given in, but she was brave and stubborn. It wasn’t hard falling in love with someone who made him feel happy by just being near him.

Chapter Four

The cold air from his apartment’s air conditioning welcomed him as he walked through his door and locked it behind him. He walked past his kitchen and flopped down on his couch. The single window in the living room had the blinds closed and the room grew darker as the sun continued to set. Sitting there in the dark silence of his apartment, he tried once more to recall the events that had happened over a week ago.

He couldn’t shake the feeling that something important was missing from his thoughts. Closing his eyes tight, he let out a groan of frustration. His head ached every time he came close to recalling whatever it was that he had forgotten. The only visual image he received was the crucifix and its mournful expression as it had looked down on him.

A sound met his ears like that of paper rustling. Opening his eyes, he glanced at his door to see an envelope on the ground where someone had slipped it into his apartment. Walking over, he paused a moment staring at the wax seal before taking a deep breath and opened it. Inside was a single line of script with gorgeous handwriting that belonged to a true calligrapher. It simply read:

Midnight at the Church

A rush came over him as he unlocked his door as fast as his hands would allow him. Running out into the hallway, he looked right and left, finding no one in sight. Desperate, he ran down the stairs and through the main hall in hopes of seeing who may have left him the letter.

“Are you okay?” It was Annie, his landlord, standing at her door with a laundry basket full of linens in her arms. “You look pale, are you getting sick again? You’re not going to pass out on me, are you?”

“N-no.” He stuttered as he made eye contact with her. “I just, well, did someone come walking out this way?”

“Not that I noticed. I just came down the hall and was unlocking my door after doing some laundry.” She took a moment to set the basket inside her apartment and came back out. “If anyone was out and about I would have passed them for sure. What’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing.” He sighed rubbing the back of his neck for a moment as he sorted through his thoughts. “I think a lack of sleep is getting to me again. Sorry to spook you, Annie.”

“Well, just call me if you need anything, Hotan.” Annie gave him a warm smile as she went back into her apartment. “Good night!”

Making it back to his living room, he dropped the letter onto the coffee table. He sat on the couch glaring at it, pondering who could have written it. It was clear that no one he knew of had the skills for such artistic writing. Furthermore, the wax seal ruled out every one. Such an old-fashioned touch and staring at it gave him a nostalgic sensation.

Who sent this to me? Why would anyone want to meet me, and then set the place at the church? The church is so vague but I know which one they are referring to. Worse is that whoever this is, wants to meet at midnight. Is this what happened to me the last time? Or is this Hisota or someone else’s way of getting under my skin?

Picking the letter back up, he leaned on his knees as he thumbed the writing. After several minutes, he closed his eyes, trying to remember. Chills crawled across his skin as he recalled the day he was found on the church floor. Straining his concentration, he managed to see a glimpse of a memory. He wasn’t alone that night in the church, without a doubt. There had been a man standing over him. All he could recall was the sad grey eyes that had stared down at him.

Is that who sent this letter? What good is it if I can’t recall what happened? Either way, how do I know if some-

A knock at the door jolted him from his thoughts. Biting his cheek for a moment, he weighed whether or not to answer it. Another round of knocking shouted through his apartment, demanding to be answered. Hesitating for a moment, he opened the door.

“Well, it seems Prince Charming does know how to answer a door.” Hisota’s dark eyes gave Hotan a rebellious glare. “It seems clear to me you don’t know how to answer a phone or email these days. At least I can confirm that, yes, you are alive, and yes, you are standing.”

“Now’s not a good time, Hisota.” Gritting his teeth, Hotan pushed his annoyance back. “I’m not in the mood to entertain company, let alone you.”

“Well excuse me for being the caring friend.” Scoffing, Hisota narrowed his eyes at him. “I just wanted to apologize for giving you a hard time at school. There’s no doubt you’re still not feeling well.”

Hotan was in no mood to respond as he glowered at Hisota from his doorway.

“Moving on…” With a sigh and smirk Hisota finished what he had initially came to say. “Once more, I am sorry, really. Call me if you need anything. I sometimes forget you don’t have the luxuries of letting Mom and Dad deal with things, like the rest of us. Get some rest, see you around, Asshole.”

“Thanks.” It was a bland reaction on Hotan’s part, but his mind would not let go of the letter that sat on the coffee table behind him.

Great, now I have Hisota starting up with me. He never comes around to be apologetic.

Closing his door, he leaned his back against it as he stared into his pitch-black apartment. The walls and objects were nothing but barely visible dark grey blobs and the air itself seemed to have frozen time. The humming of the air conditioner kicking on filled his ears as he pictured the grey-eyed man’s face once more.

The shape of his face had been thin and gaunt as if he had lived a hard life, yet not a wrinkle grazed his skin. His hair had glimmered, a silver grey like his own or possibly white. At first glance, one could have assumed they were related, but Hotan had no living relatives. Actually, his Dad might still be alive, but deadbeat father’s tend to keep their distance. His mother had informed him that on both sides, his grandparents had passed away and beyond that, no one really knew.

I’ll go. If I am ever going to get some answers about what happened, this might be my one and only chance. I’ll just have my cell phone ready and be on alert. The decision made, he had to wait to see what would come of it. Nevertheless, this all still feels like a dream. Nothing logical – and worse, I am thrown into dealing with everything alone, again.

Exhausted from his dilemma, he decided to wash the tension off his muscles in the shower. Eyes closed, he indulged in the beating pressure of the water on top of his head as he took deep breaths of the steam-filled air. Feeling the muscles loosen in his neck and shoulders, he cracked his eyes to watch the water and soap bubbles swirl down the drain.

There are days I just wish all my troubles would wash away just as easily as that…

Frustrated, he slammed the shower knob, turning the water off in an instant. Toweling off he approached the Medicine cabinet to pull out his cologne and deodorant. A dark flash in the mirror caught his attention and he paused. Furrowing his brow, he slowly opened the cabinet once more, reluctant at first. He reached a point where he could see a black symbol in the mirror’s reflection as it displayed the opposite mirror’s image. Something black stretched itself across his back.

“What the…” Gaping at the tattooed image, he stammered to himself. “How the hell did that come about?”

Reaching behind him, he rubbed at the skin that had the discoloration, but could not differentiate between the two areas. He studied it for some time, but the conclusion was simply that it was a mysterious tattoo. If he had gotten it that night, he would have known. Tattoos sting for quite some time after you get them, and this was a back piece that took up a lot of real estate. There was no mistaking the tribal imagery; Angelic wings etched into his back, abstract and organic in design.

What the hell is going on with me? Did I go through a rebellious stage and forget?

Baffled, he paced the living room floor for several minutes. There was no logic behind it. When did this appear? Was it there all week and I didn’t notice? Or maybe it showed up this morning? It seems to be a tattoo, but no scabbing? No pain? What in the hell is going on? Am I losing my mind or maybe I’m in a coma and this is all some wicked ass dream…

He stood there lost at what to think or feel anymore. Glancing over at the clock, he had run out of time. Shoving on his jeans and a band shirt, he rushed out the door. Annoyed by his thoughts, he slapped on his earbuds as he straddled his motorcycle. As he took off down the quiet, late night streets, his ears were greeted with The Blackout’s song Save Ourselves. Music always had a way of reflecting his emotions and thoughts.

Please don’t let this take away everything I have. I barely have anything left as it stands. I am so tired of being so alone…

Parking in front of the church, the half-moon draped everything in a light glow. Pulling his helmet off, the frigid night nipped at his face as his breath steamed in gentle puffs. He stood there engulfed in the church’s shadow as he grimaced at it. Inside would decide if he would be getting his answers or possibly finding himself laid out on the floor again.

A breeze cut across him as leaves slid and scraped across the sidewalk. He took in a deep breath and held it there as he opened the heavy wooden doors. Inside someone had taken the time to light the candles that sat on tall silver stands at both ends of the long pews. His eyes glided across every crevice he could see in the wavering light, but no one was present.

The nerves in his spine and shoulders tightened and tickled as he took slow steps toward the front. He was aiming to sit in his usual spot, hoping some normalcy would calm the nerves that knotted with every passing second.

Am I alone or is someone watching me? Please don’t let this be some sort of trap…

Making it to his seat, he was paranoid. Staring up into the statue on the cross, he saw a different expression than the sorrowful one he had last seen. Tonight that granite body seemed alive as it hung in its tortured place. The wings were open wider than he had remembered before and in the moonlight, it still shadowed the pews. One could wonder whether it was shielding them or hiding them under those elegant wings. Hotan had never seen anyone associate wings to the crucifix. It almost seemed like a paradox in thought, but seeing it in practice was very much the opposite. The look was complete, or moreover, correct in sensation as he continued admiring the artisanship. It had a clear message of salvation and hope.

A movement caught his attention and he squinted to focus in on the statue’s face. There was something wet crawling down the cheeks of the statue. The color of red faded into existence and it was clear that the crucifix was crying blood.

What is going on? Am I witnessing a miracle? He opened his mouth but no words would come to him. Why does the color come to me for something like this? What is the importance of me being here to witness this?

It seemed as if the statue had a slight smile and Hotan could feel his heart racing. Whether his reaction was fear, excitement, or panic was beyond his own understanding.

“It is not often we get to see proof of his existence.” The voice was stern and smooth as it flowed from behind Hotan. “Sorry for running late, Hotan.”

Looking towards the doors, Hotan saw the tall silver-haired man from his memory. He wore a white business suit, dark tie, and eyeglasses that complimented his eyes and face. He approached silent and slow, causing no alarm in his casual approach.

“Who are you?” Narrowing his eyes, Hotan could not shake the sensation that he should know who this man was. “What’s going on he-”

He had glanced back to the statue to see that there were no more signs of red wet tears down its face. The expressionless statue showed him no more sorrow as if the life had left it.

“Sorry if I startled you.” He paused in his steps just a few rows from where Hotan sat. “I was hoping to take some time with you tonight and explain what is going on.”

“Does this have to do with what happened to me a few nights ago?” Swallowing, Hotan continued with his questions. “You were here for that, right?”

“Do you not remember?” The man furrowed his brow and tightened his lips, concerned by the questions. “Or do you only remember some of it?”

“I only remember your face, nothing else.” Trying to keep calm, Hotan stood in hopes of getting his nerves to stop its ever tightening of his throat. “What the hell happened here? Who are you? What’s going on?”

“My name is Talib.” Hotan’s heart skipped a beat as if he recognized the name from a past life. Talib pushed his glasses up as he spoke, “I am the element of Judgment, an immortal. What happened to you was a release of your powers when you were threatened. A defensive mechanism built in that protects you when your life is in danger. As for what is going on, I am still trying to figure it out myself.”

“Immortal?” Hotan wanted to question him, but something deep inside urged him to take the information as fact. He turned his focus to the only logical piece of information. “My life was in danger? How?”

“Geliah, the element of Fear, decided to take matters into his own hands. He has a vendetta against you and now he has found you. The man will not stop until he has killed you.” Talib watched as Hotan mulled the information over. “He believes that killing you will release the remnants of the spell, or curse as he refers to it. The conclusion he has come to is that he will become normal again, as if the spell had never happened. Unfortunately, he is sadly mistaken.”

“A spell? Why would I have anything to do with a spell?” Now he was starting to feel skeptical as this crazy conversation continued. “I can only assume he’s one of these immortals like you. I don’t get how I could have possibly have anything to do with his past. I am 18 years old, it’s improbable for me to have anything to do with this.”

“Do you remember anything about your former self?” Talib seemed to be paling as he cautiously spoke. “Anything at all?”

“Former self?” Bewildered by the questions, Hotan had made it clear this was all sounding like a fantasy novel. “What do you mean by that? I don’t understand where this is going.”

“You were the one that cast the spell. By the powers of the element of Rebirth, you had set in motion a spell of continuous reincarnation on all of us in hopes of allowing us to live a normal existence. Most of us had agreed to this, even knowing that we would never know who we were or remember one another.” Talib turned his back to Hotan as he continued. “As your brother, I was left as a watcher. For some reason you knew something might go wrong. Now I have been desperately searching for you, as well as those who have awakened, in hopes of figuring out what has gone wrong. Does any of this sound familiar?”

“No.” Hotan’s mind echoed the word brother as if it had been a lost fact in his life. “To be honest, it sounds like a fairy tale.”

“Perhaps it would since you do not recall anything at all.” Hotan could see that he had pulled a napkin from his coat pocket and was cleaning his glasses. “Just know that we have much to do if you are to master your powers. I am sorry that I underestimated the severity of the situation, little brother.”

“All of this is just crazy. Why would you call me brothe-” It was as if the wind was sucked out of his lungs. An overwhelming sensation of truth hit him as he caught Talib’s glare. “You, you’re my brother?”

“When was the last time you saw someone with natural silver hair, Hotan?” Talib closed his eyes as he took a deep breath. His voice was rich in trust and knowledge, unlike anyone else he had ever heard speak. “That much is apparent. I will need time to figure out a way around your inability to recall who you once were. Until then, you can take this time to continue to heal and digest the information I have given you. Perhaps when I see you next, a memory or two has surfaced?”

“That’s it?” Panic now came over him as Talib started for the door. “You can’t dump all this nonsense on me and just leave! Don’t you know I have no one! No one’s left Talib! I am all alone! Don’t you even care?”

“Sometimes sacrifices have to be made…” Talib disappeared through the doors.

Hotan chased after him but by the time he made it outside, there were no signs of anyone. The wind had picked up speed and in the distance thunder rumbled.

Why does everyone leave me? When will this loneliness stop?

Chapter Five

Hotan woke to the buzzing of his cellphone as it danced about on the coffee table. He rolled himself off the couch, standing to stretch his stiff muscles. Last night had been more of an annoyance and answered nothing. He had more questions and worse off, no means to contact Talib. His phone started another round of ringing and buzzing, demanding his attention. He sat down and saw that Shellie was calling.

“Good Morning!” Shellie’s voice was loud and bright like always. “Are we still going out for lunch today?”

“Crap, I completely forgot.” He smashed his hand into his face, rubbing the sleep from it. “What time is it?”

“Noon-ish.” He could hear her sighing on the other end. “If you are not feeling up to it, we can reschedule or do something else.”

“No, just give me a few to wake up and I’ll come get you.” Yawning, he finished rubbing his left eye with the palm of his hand. “Long as you are ok with that?”

“Yea!” Her voice perked back up. “I’ll be here, ready to go! Bye, Hotan!”

“Bye, Shel.” He hung up with her and stared down at his phone for several minutes.

It was frustrating that Talib hadn’t left a number, or even an email. Anything would have been better than nothing at all. How could he just leave me like this? You can’t tell someone that you’re their only surviving family member and then walk out the door! But that’s exactly what you did. You told me some grand story and left.

Jerking up off the couch, he stomped into the bathroom to splash cold water on his face. Staring himself in the eyes, he felt old and worn out.

Former self? Is there some truth to it? Am I staring at a stranger in the mirror? Closing his eyes, he pictured the tribal wings that painted his entire back. Is that part of it? Do these wings hold the answer to me mastering these so-called powers of the element of Rebirth? What am I saying? Do I really believe this person’s radical story?

Grabbing his helmet off the table, he headed out the door. Distracted and absorbed into his thoughts, he barely had enough time to stop before smacking into Annie. Once more, her hands were full as she fumbled for her keys. She had overloaded her arms with grocery bags this time. Hotan unloaded them from her so she could sort her keys out to unlock her apartment.

“Thanks again.” She opened the door wide and took the bags. “Wait here a second. I needed to give you something.”

“You need some work done?” He leaned in watching her as she placed her bags on the kitchen counter and grabbed up an envelope. “What’s that?”

“A note for you, it came to me with a check.” She raised an eyebrow at him as she handed it over. “You didn’t tell me you managed to get a sponsor.”

“Sponsor?” Baffled he opened the letter. “I have no idea what you’re talking about…”

His voice trailed off as he read the letter:

Hotan,

Consider this a token of good faith. Your rent has been taken care of for the next year.

Your sponsor,

Jacob

“I, I don’t know who this is?” He looked at her with nothing else to say.

“You don’t?” She smirked bashfully to herself. “Well, whoever he was, he was hot.”

“Are you kidding?” Folding the letter up, he tucked it into his back pocket. “What did he look like?”

“Taller than you, very handsome,” Blushing, she could no longer look Hotan in the eye. “Short blonde hair, deep blue eyes that look purple, and this awesome tribal deer head with horns tattooed across his entire back.”

“Was he shirtless or something? Are you sure the guy who delivered this was the same one that wrote it?” Confused, he continued to ask more questions. “When did he come by? What time?”

“It had to be close to midnight last night. His name was Jacob, isn’t that who signed that?” Red cheeked, she sighed. “He left about 6 am this morning for work, but I didn’t catch where that was. All I know is he grumbled on about downtown traffic.”

Hotan stood there in silence as he processed what Annie was implying. “Sometimes I wonder about your habits, Annie. Have you ever tried dating first?”

“Hush! If anyone else had said that I would have killed them. Besides, I’m 27; I think I am old enough to make my own decisions.” Rolling her eyes at him, she waved at him. “Bye, Hotan. I need to get this stuff put away. My ice cream is melting.”

“Just be careful, that’s all I am asking.” She shut the door, and he continued his path out the door.

As he made his way to Shellie’s house, he weighed the information in his mind. A sign of good faith? This has to do with Talib, I know it. Who the hell is this Jacob? Is he one of us? A tribal tattoo across his back as well, maybe there is a connection after all. Then again, every suave guy has a tattoo, if not across his back then on his biceps. Why pose as a sponsor? Why even attempt to support me on a financial level? I can’t help but feel it’s out of guilt. I am not into taking charity from anyone, but they knew to take it to Annie, and not me. Oh, Annie… you make horrible decisions at times. Sleeping with the messenger was a bit much. I don’t think this can get any more complicated…

He picked up Shellie and they headed to their destination. This was his chance to be able to take a moment away from the chaos. At least taking her out to lunch gave him a moment to forget what he had no control over. They were pulling into Benny’s Place, a diner just a block away from the club where they played. It was a popular eatery and most of the high school kids worked at the 24-hour restaurant. It definitely beat working at the fast food joints and the tips were decent. The hostess smiled as she seated them at their normal booth. It was against the front windows that looked out onto the main street. The weather was decent, but it was still windy after last night’s storms.

They had missed the lunch crowd and only a few patrons were occupying the place. A woman shook her newspaper at the bar top as she sipped her coffee, flicking her long braid off her shoulders. At another booth were two men, one with a laptop, as they discussed business over their late lunches. Looking back at Shellie, who had sat across the booth from him, she smiled.

Should I tell her about this nonsense? Would she even believe me? No, I shouldn’t worry her, she’s already paranoid about what happened to me. Maybe I can tip toe around the crazier details?

Hotan found himself staring at the poor little bookstore across the street. It had always been out of place among the newer buildings, much like the church that he admired. Lagging behind the times, he could relate to it. Like him, it didn’t fit in with everything else around it. Feeling out of place is how he felt, in school, in life. His situation weighed heavier on his shoulders as he stared at the store.

He wasn’t the same as everyone around him, that fact has been clear since the day he was born. Looking back at Shellie, she stared at him with her cute smile, cheerful. She had no idea how much he wished to be normal like her.

How do I tell her that I am not like her? Maybe it’s true, I’m one of these immortal people, no longer a human being. It would at least explain the displacement I have felt all this time.

“So what’s wrong with you? You usually speak a few more words than this.” Shellie’s smile had faded. “Are you still sick?”

“I recently ran into my brother.” He gave her a funny look, trying to decide what he was attempting to do. “Sorry, I am feeling better though. Just dealing with… stuff.”

“Brother? I thought you had no family left? You never told me you had a brother.” Shellie leaned back in her seat feeling she had missed something. “How many more secrets do you have?”

“Not many. As for having a brother, I had no idea I had one either.” Shrugging he continued, feeling some relief in discussing his recent problems. “His name’s Talib. Nice guy, but a little strange. He came out of nowhere, literally. I’m still in shock and confused about it. It’s a lot to take in. I just, don’t know what to do with the information.”

“A little strange? You two must be related. I assume he’s older? I couldn’t imagine your mom sneaking off to have another kid after you.” She grinned, trying to change the atmosphere to a more positive one. “So, when do I get to meet this brother of yours? Is he still around or is he a true Samuels and has mysteriously left?”

“Don’t know. Not sure if he’s from my mom’s side, dad’s side, or possibly both. Definitely older than me. I guess whenever he decides to come back to town again I’ll see about introducing you to him. He had to leave to take care of some things apparently.” Averting Shellie’s eyes, he saw Kyle walk into the restaurant. A bouquet of flowers in his hands, he wrangled up their tall, dark haired waitress. “Did I miss something? When did Kyle become a romantic?”

“Huh?” Shellie looked back for a moment and chuckled. “Oh, Kyle has had a crush on my friend Jessica for quite some time. I’ve been pushing her to at least give the poor boy a chance. She needs a sweet guy for a change instead of all those jerks.”

“Oh really?” Hotan smiled watching Jessica blush and Kyle no doubtedly saying something embarrassing, his forte. “He’s a good guy and deserves a chance. Do you know all the servers in town? It seems like wherever I take you, you seem to know at least one of the employees.”

“Anyway, I just hope it works out between those two. They would make a cute couple, don’t you think?” They both watched as Kyle and Jessica chuckled for a moment as she placed the flowers in a vase. “Looks like it’s off to a good start so far.”

“Shellie…” Staring down at his clasped hands on the table, he started to think about things again. Maybe it’s not fair to her. I am so distant, and it’s only getting worse. When we first started going out, it was amazing. My mom died and I distanced myself, but she pulled me back. Now I am doing it again, turning myself back to the recluse I was before she entered my life. It’s not fair to her to be stuck in a relationship I am failing to maintain.

“Yeah?” Her smile faded as she looked at his solemn face. “What’s wrong now?”

“If you want to end our relationship it’s fine with me. I know I don’t take you out much, and lately, I’ve been a loner.” He looked up at her big gentle eyes to read her reactions. “And Hisota’s been a real pain about us dating on top of that. I know that can be stressful, but I have a lot going on and-”

“Hotan, if it bothered me I would have said so or ended it already.” She put her soft, sincere hands on top of his and gave him a warm grin. “I’ll always want to be with you. You’re not like the other guys at school. You let me have my freedom and I merely do the same for you, so if you want to be alone that’s fine. I can always make plans with my other friends, it’s not the end of the world. Just remember I’m here for you and if you need to let things out, I’m willing to listen. We don’t demand much from one another and we tend to understand each other’s needs with no questions asked. I doubt I can get that sort of mature relationship out of anyone in our high school.”

“I just don’t want to tie you down. You deserve to be happy…” It’s your nature to be happy, but my life is one of sorrow.

“I know.”

“Are you guys ready to order?” Jessica greeted the two of them giggling to herself.

“So, what did you say to him, Jessica?” Shellie leaned on the table smirking at her friend. “Yes or no? Or even a maybe?”

“I said yes. I’ve never had a guy bring me flowers in person.” She rolled her eyes at Shellie. “So what do you guys want today?”

“Coffee and today’s special.” Hotan handed her the menu as he smirked at her. “Watch out, Jess. He might convince you to have those seven boys he’s been wanting. He has plans you know… BIG plans for a BIG family.”

“Oh no!” Laughing she covered her mouth with the menu. “Shut up! What about you Shellie? What do you want to eat today?”

“The usual,” Shellie winked at her, following Hotan’s lead in teasing her friend. “But really Jessica, he’s a good guy.”

Jessica shook her head as she left for the restaurant’s kitchen.

“Hey! Look who it is!” Kyle came over when he noticed they were there. “I should have known I would see you guys here!”

“Hey, congrats Kyle!” Shellie scooted over as Kyle slid into the booth next to her. Leaning onto the table, his goofy grin stretched across his face. “You finally harassed Jessica enough for her to say yes.”

“Thanks! So what’s happening, my homie?” Kyle nodded his head at Hotan, his expression serious. “You still not feeling good?”

“I feel fine. I wish everyone would stop asking.” Hotan grunted, “Found out I had an older Brother. Still trying to figure that ordeal out and how it never surfaced before.”

“No kidding.” Kyle sat back into the seat, stunned. “So, is he, well, cool?”

“I don’t know yet, barely got a chance to talk with the man. Let’s just hope I get another chance to talk to him, anyhow.” Jessica returned with their drinks. Taking his coffee from her, he started adding sugar and cream to it as he spoke. “I am just still trying to adjust to the idea, and the questions that have no answers to them yet. It was so sudden, and well, for once I feel clueless.”

“Hey Baby.” Kyle lowered his voice, giving Jessica a seductive look. “How about you and me get married and have us some chicklens?”

“In your dreams, red head.” Jessica winked as she busted out laughing. “You’re moving too fast for me! First flowers then skipping ahead to kids? Hell no!”

“Told you so…” Grinning, Hotan took a cautious sip of his coffee.

Kyle always lightens the air up when I get too serious. At least this helps relieve some of my stress. Granted, they have no idea how much crazier my situation truly is.

“Kyle! Stop messing around!” Shellie chuckled, elbowing him in the ribs. “You’re so ridiculous!”

“Ok, ok. Get back to work woman.” Kyle winked at Jessica who blushed in response.

“Their food might be ready by now, anyhow.” Promptly she left the table and headed for the entrance to tend to a few customers waiting to be seated.

Hotan’s attention followed Jessica as she neared the front doors. The bell rung over the doors as a new customer entered the diner, catching his attention. A tall, bulky man with dark-haired dread locks walked in from the busy street. He couldn’t see his face, but only the back of the man’s dark trench coat. Something in the back of Hotan’s mind was screaming that he should know this man. The stranger must have been quite buff with the way the coat fit him, a typical large brute.

Hotan watched as he towered over Jessica, following her to his seat, a table not far from where they were. The man flipped his coat as he sat down, facing Hotan with his slanted eyes sharp. Amber eyes gleamed back at him from across the restaurant. A smirk slithered across the brute’s masculine face as they exchanged eye contact. It was as if he knew that Hotan had seen the color of his eyes.

Why can I see the color of his eyes so vividly? What is so important about this man that it required this much attention? What am I missing? Who is this man?

Hotan’s nerves unraveled as he slammed his coffee down on the table, splashing some of it. It was an involuntary reaction as he failed to break away from the yellow-orange eyes that stared back. Overwhelming fear shouted that if he looked away he would miss an imminent attack from this behemoth. The man glared back, amused by the look on Hotan’s paling face.

This stranger didn’t look familiar to him, but his very presence made Hotan feel tense and uneasy. Recognizable dread filled him from the unfamiliar entity that continued to burn through him with his taunting glare. The man turned his playful look away from him to look at his menu, yet it seemed he was still watching Hotan’s every move.

Who is this? I feel like my soul is screaming the answer but I’m too scared to hear it. Why does this man terrify me so much? Why am I so afraid? My chest hurts from the pounding of my heart.

Every thought that came to Hotan felt like the titan could hear it. He swallowed hard as his heart pounded at his ears; the room darkened and muted itself around him as if an explosion had happened. The muscles in his body ached under the pressure of how tense he was becoming with each passing second. Breathing harder, his chest tightening, his skin clammy; Hotan was being crushed by his own sense of fear. He could only be thankful that the enemy was no longer staring him in the eyes. The invisible force of horror continued to invade him, drowning his very soul within it.

Finally, muttering to himself, Hotan realized what and who was causing him so much panic: “Geliah, the element of Fear.”

“Hotan, are you okay Bro?” Kyle’s smile had faded as he looked at his friend’s paled face. “You going to pass out again?”

“No.” Standing, Hotan dashed into the men’s room, his stomach knotting and twisting.

Rushing into a stall, locking it behind him, Hotan turned to lunge himself over the toilet bowl. Coughing and choking, cold sweat ran down the side of his face. Everything felt like it had crashed down on him, bringing him to his knees. He watched what nerve he had left swirl down the toilet. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath trying to stabilize himself, attempting to push back the sickening sensation of his fear.

Calming down, trying to put things back together as he regained what few steady nerves he had left at this point. Desperately swallowing down the fleeting panic, the pain in his throat brought no comfort. The bathroom door creaked open, causing him to lose his hold of his nerves and almost failing to control his vocal cords.

Fear came rushing back, and he began to freak. Frozen, he held his breath. A rabbit trapped in a corner, the stalking wolf with its hungry eyes ensnaring him.

This is it! Geliah has me! Here huddled to a toilet! I have no way of defending myself!

Chapter Six

“Hotan?” Kyle’s voice came as a relief, dissolving the horror. “Are you that sick man? You shouldn’t push yourself that hard…”

Coming out of the stall, Hotan walked over to the sink feeling depleted of his energy. “I guess so. I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately.”

“Man, I don’t ever remember you getting this sick; it hit you hard out there.” Kyle watched as Hotan rinsed his mouth out and splashed cold water on his face.

Slouched over the vanity, Hotan stared into the white sink. “It’s been a really strange week. Very strange, I don’t know what to think about anything anymore.”

“No kidding.” Kyle sighed, clearing his throat. “So, what really happened that night at the old church? No matter how I mull it over, it’s impossible for that place to be in that good repair overnight, am I right? It’s like David Copperfield came in there and did some of his crazy mojo stuff. I was just there a week ago with you. Work like that takes months and there wasn’t any signs of repairs when I was there, so…”

“It’s hard to say, I still can’t remember anything from that night. I don’t know if I will ever remember and last night didn’t answer my questions like I had hoped.” Looking up at his reflection, he yearned for his former self to give him answers. If this is all true, please let me wake up and remember. “Meeting my brother was strange. He had a lot to say but I don’t know what to believe. It all sounded so crazy.”

“Last night?” Crossing his arms Kyle gave him a grave expression through the bathroom mirror. “Where last night? What all did he tell you?”

“The church, he asked me to meet him at midnight last night. I wish I knew a way to explain, but I can’t. All I can figure is it has something to do with this mark on my back.” Hotan straightened himself. “I can’t help but feel this is the only proof I have that something is happening to me. What exactly is going on, I am not sure. Everything just seems irrational no matter how many ways I run it through my head.”

“What proof is that?” Puzzled, Kyle gawked at him as if he had lost his mind. “You’re sounding weird, dude. Not that you’ve ever been normal, but this is just out of character, for sure.”

“I guess I might as well show you. Just don’t tell Shel.” He took off his shirt, to expose his marking of the angelic tribal tattoo on his back. “This tattoo thing; we both know I have never been interested in tattoos, let alone had one.”

Hotan watched Kyle’s eyes widened in surprise. “That thing covers your entire back, holy shit.”

“See, I don’t know how, but it appeared after I passed out.” Pulling his shirt back down, he turned to face Kyle. “I just didn’t see it or it didn’t surface until the other night. I feel like I am losing my mind, Kyle.”

Kyle cracked a nervous smile. “Heh, and I thought mine was big. I’ve been trying to talk to you alone, but every time I have chickened out on bringing it up. See, after the night you passed out, I started having weird dreams and then like you, this freaking huge tattoo just appeared on my back.”

“What?” Hotan watched as Kyle pulled his own shirt up to expose a marking of a tribal phoenix across his back. “How? Kyle, you weren’t there, or were you? Why didn’t you say something sooner?” What on earth is going on?

“No, I wasn’t there, but it showed up that same night. You got any clue on what it means? It’s clear it’s not a tattoo, man. I think we both would have felt that for a month.”

“Yeah, but, but, how in the hell?” Hotan’s words fumbled over one another as his thoughts filled with more questions. What are the odds? My best friend too? I must be in another realm. “I just don’t understand? None of this makes any sense…” I just want this nightmare to end…

“What does it mean?” Kyle gave Hotan a suspicious glare. “You have something to do with all of this, don’t you? It’s the only thing I could think of.”

“Apparently it has everything to do with me, or who I used to be. This just seems too coincidental.” He headed towards the door, wanting to find more answers. “Let’s see if we can locate my brother. If anyone has answers, it’s him.”

“Your brother?” Kyle was following close behind him as they left the bathroom. “You have to know more than that. How does this all fall back on your brother?”

Hotan watched Geliah from the corner of his eye like a mouse sneaking pass the sleepy cat. Geliah’s stare was unbroken as he watched Hotan leave the bathroom. He grinned as he took a sip of his coffee and Hotan felt his heart flutter. There was no mistaken how amused he was by how sick with fear Hotan had gotten. Hotan and Kyle went back to their seats, both silent as they sat there. No longer overwhelmed by fear, Hotan glared at Geliah with a sense of rage. It was obvious that he had used his abilities of the element of Fear against him.

Now I understand what their powers are like. He’s the element of fear, and he can control that in other people. He’s so strong. Not to mention he’s twice my size in height and muscle. Talib made it very clear he will not be letting me go too far out of his sight, but why hasn’t he tried attacking me? Doesn’t he want me dead? If that’s how the power of Fear works, then what on earth does Rebirth do exactly?

“Are you two okay?” Shellie took a bite of her salad, chewing it slowly as she shifted her eyes from Hotan to Kyle. Both of them looked drained, she placed her fork on the plate as she made her voice louder. “What’s wrong? Are you two dying or something?”

“We’re fine.” They had both responded as one, only adding to her suspicions.

“What’s wrong now?” She twisted her mouth, expressing her irritation. “Are you two planning on leaving?”

“Yeah, I need to leave.” Hotan broke his stare with Geliah and gave Shellie an empty smile. “I should have cancelled. I’ve got an upset stomach still.” She’s not buying my excuse, but I know she’ll let me go.

“Hey! Jessica!” Kyle waved Jessica over to the table. “Do you mind taking Shellie home? I’m going to ride with Hotan, make sure he makes it home.”

“Yea, I guess, why?” Jessica looked at Kyle puzzled, but noticed the awkward atmosphere at the table. “My shift ends in about 30 minutes anyhow. Maybe we can hit the mall or something, huh Shellie?”

“Figures.” Shellie sighed as she picked at her salad. “You need to take better care of yourself, Hotan. I suppose when you feel better we can sit and talk some more.”

“I’m sorry.” Hotan stood up watching Shellie’s flustered face. “I’ll make up for this later, ok?”

Hope I didn’t hurt your feelings, Shel. You’re a strong person, but it’s not nice of me to rely on that one element of who you are.

Shellie lifted an eyebrow at him not convinced. “Go ahead and go.”

“Thanks Babe!” Kyle hugged Jessica. “I’ll make sure he gets home in one piece, Shellie.”

“See you, Shel.” Hotan kissed her gently on the lips as he left money on the table. “We’ll talk later, promise.”

Kyle followed Hotan’s Suzuki across town in his green convertible mustang. They came to a stop in front of the old church and stood in silence staring up at the building. Both of them wanted answers, but they were unsure if they were truly ready to hear them. Two mourning doves startled them when they flew out from under a pew as they made their way to the front of the cathedral.

They sat down looking up at the crucifix with its granite wings towering over them; it felt like it was protecting them from some unseen danger. Hotan sighed, thinking over how complicated things had gotten within the last 24 hours. Staring at the statue, both of them remained silent and deep in thought. His eyes observed the wooden pegs nailed into its wrist and driven through its feet. A slate at its base held an elegant engraving upon it:

Unto you that fear my name shall the Sun of Righteousness arise with healing in his wings. ~Malachi 4:2a

Hotan smiled to himself, engrossed by the saying.

What would I give if sitting here every day under those stone wings could actually heal me and take all the bad things away? It’s a nice thought. Righteousness seems to be rare in the world these days. Whatever happened to morals and those of divine justice and law? If it still existed, I don’t think I would be dealing with so much turmoil in my life now.

Everyone makes human choices, and naturally, the mistakes. No one can accept the responsibility of their poor choices. Well, sometimes it’s not your choice at all. When did I lose control of my own life? It doesn’t even feel like I have a say in any of the events that are happening to me. Where does that leave me in the equation; just a pawn in destiny’s game?

I have been thrown headlong in the most bizarre situation I have ever heard of. I feel like Alice in Wonderland and I have fallen into some other dimension. All I can do is be careful about what actions I make. I need answers, explanations. Hell, anything at this point would be beneficial. There is no way for me to judge things when I feel so naive about what’s going on.

If I am one of these so-called immortals, then what new rules of life will I need to follow? How big will my mistakes and wrong decisions be? Will it hurt those around me, or something on a larger universal scale? How much damage can my actions cause once I master the power of Rebirth? When I make one wrong choice, one selfish unrighteous choice, how would it affect everything? Who would pay the ultimate price, me, people around me, or the world? Will that horrible choice take me down, or just leave me all alone in my dread?

“So?” Kyle sighed as he broke the silence. “Are you going to explain things or leave me hanging? Or are we waiting on someone?”

“Just trying to think of a way I can contact my brother.” He continued staring up at the monument in front of them. “I don’t really have any answers for you, but I am hoping he will have some for the both of us. Then again, I was hoping to find him here for some reason. Otherwise, I have no way of contacting him.”

“Dude, that sucks...” Kyle leaned on his knees as he stared down at the marble floors. “Really deep stuff then, huh? You really think you have a chance of finding your brother here? What makes you think he would come?”

“I don’t know. Somewhere deep inside of me, I can’t help but feel if I wait here, he’ll show up. All I got from him last time was that I was supposedly an immortal and that I should be remembering my former self.” Hotan shot Kyle a grim look as he spoke. “He went on about elements, like I am Rebirth and that there were powers involved. I didn’t really take it all in to be honest. It just didn’t seem logical, but the man at the diner, Geliah. He made me aware that this may not be as farfetched as I was conceiving it to be…” My stomach and nerves are still churning at the thought of Geliah.

“Immortal? Are you serious?” They both paused as the sound of footsteps clacked on the floor behind them.

“I figured you would return once the information had time to soak in. You are back sooner than I expected. Does this mean you are ready to hear more?” Talib stood in the aisle way, once more sporting the white business suit and dark tie. “I see you have brought Kyle along with you.”

“Yea. Kyle, this is Talib, my older brother, apparently.” Hotan was relieved to see that his instincts had been correct. “He’s the one that I got all this crazy information from.”

“No shit.” Kyle blinked, “You’re an ass for leaving Hotan hanging like that, man.”

“No, it was more like easing me into the story and forcing me to mull it over in my head. We forgot to discuss one minor detail; the tattoo.” Hotan glared into Talib’s eyes, feeling annoyed that he had failed to bring this topic up in their first meeting. “You knew I would come back when I was ready to accept what little you gave me as some sort of truth, right?”

“Precisely.” Talib cleared his throat. “And yes, the marking across your back is part of it. My question to you is: Are you ready to hear more?”

“Please. Will it be a problem with Kyle here?” Hotan shot a glance back at Kyle.

“There is nothing wrong with him being here, he is one of us, whether he is fully aware of it or not.” Hotan felt his heart skip a beat at Talib’s reply. “As you suspected, we all bare markings, much like tattoos across our backs. It signifies that we are immortals and symbolizes what we are. For instance, Kyle bares the image of a phoenix because he is the element of fire.”

“So how many immortals are there?” Furrowing his brow, Hotan waited for the answer. What were the odds of Kyle being one of, well, us? That now meant it was me, Kyle, Talib, and Geliah who were labeled as immortals.

“There are twenty. That is all that I am aware of over the centuries I have walked this earth. I know each face and the element along with its marking. Though we have lived a long time, the state in which they are awakening has weakened them drastically. It is not known what triggered this in the last 400 years or so.” Crossing his arms, Talib lectured on, “As far as our Origin story, I will have to save that for later. For now, we must focus on attempting to regain your memories or at least the ability to control your element, Hotan. Of all the elements, yours can be the most dangerous. Rebirth involves affecting Life and Death itself, as your marking implies. That is why you bare a wing of life on the right side and the wing of death on-”

“You’re wrong.” Hotan’s abruptness caught Talib off guard. “The wings are the same on both sides.” This is starting to not sound good at all.

“Show me.” Talib furrowed his brow as he came closer to Hotan as he pulled his shirt up. He stared at his back for several moments. The growing concern on his face made Hotan anxious. Why is he this worked up? Is it possible he made a mistake? “You are right… it is not the same.”

“What does that mean?” Kyle cut in, the uneasiness in the room growing. “You knew mine, did you forget his? Were you mistaken, Talib?”

“I would never forget something about my own brother.” Talib turned away from them, gaining a private moment in order to think. “It still has both wings, but they are overlapping on both sides. Perhaps this is why you cannot recall anything about your former self. Life and Death intertwined with each other…”

His voice trailed off and they stood in silence. Hotan shifted nervously, the tension in Talib’s back was clear even through his business coat.

Something isn’t right… this guy doesn’t seem like the type to not know a crucial detail like this. Whatever is going wrong with me is without a doubt my fault somehow. Or at least the old Hotan’s fault, whoever and where ever he is. Am I a different person and he gave me his powers? Or am I truly his reincarnate that’s just forgotten who I am?

“This is definitely the source of the problem.” Talib’s voice jerked Hotan from his thoughts as he turned to face him and Kyle. “What it means, I have no idea. I will need some time to research this. I have never seen anyone have a change in their element’s mark before. I am confident that you are slowly becoming immortal and sense the dormancy of Rebirth in you. Normally immortality is instant upon the first use of your powers, but with you, it is a small trickle. Just be careful. Your powers are fading into existence and it may pick up speed at any moment. You are the embodiment of life and death, and if you are not aware that your abilities are there, you can seriously harm someone. This cathedral was restored in a matter of minutes with your powers but shortly after, reverted back to a state of dormancy.”

“So, does that mean we’re not humans? A different race or something else?” Kyle was now crossing his arms. “We’re not humans, right?”

“We are humans, or at least started that way.” Talib cracked a slight smile, his cold expression broken for the first time. “We each have become our elements, and like them, immortal and never-ending. In order to keep natural order, all aspects of the element are within our reach.”

“So that’s how it happened…” Rubbing the side of his face, Hotan thought aloud. “That’s why I got so sick.” That’s why the church seems reborn and that’s why Geliah was provoking fear so easily. He is fear itself in human form.

“What made you sick at the restaurant?” Talib’s smile faded as Kyle questioned Hotan. “I’ve never seen you so sick. Never ever have you been sick before.”

“The guy in the trench coat.” Hotan took a deep breath feeling uneasy as he recalled Geliah’s devilish smirk. “Geliah was there in the restaurant.”

Hotan took note of Talib’s uncomfortable shift. “Geliah?”

“All I know is that I’m safe, for now. He seems content with torturing me from a distance and making me miserable.” Huffing, Hotan sat down, his thoughts spinning into a hurricane of concerns and theories. “He’s the element of Fear and he’s very strong, inhumanly strong.”

“This damn thing on my back is going to get my ass killed. At least we’re in it together, right? Watch each other’s backs?” Kyle gave him a halfhearted smirk, failing at his attempt to break the tension.

“Yea.” Taking a deep breath, Hotan liked the thought of not being entirely alone in the situation. “What are your thoughts on Geliah, Talib?”

“He will become a problem, but for the time being, avoid him.” He turned from them once more as he started for the door. “I will find you again if anything new happens. If something urgent comes up, get in contact with Jacob.”

“So Jacob is one of us.” Talib froze for a moment at Hotan’s statement. “I was starting to get suspicious.”

“Yes, he is one of us.” Talib started for the door again, “See you when I find out more.”

“I hope so.” As the doors closed, it felt as if his only hope for answers left him. Looking back at Kyle, Hotan managed a reassuring smile. “At least I’m not alone, right? I suppose we should call it a day.”

“Cool with me, see you around, man.” Kyle gave him a quick hug. “Watch yourself. Stay safe and call me when you find out more.”

Chapter Seven

“Hotan!” He jerked from unlocking his apartment door. “Hey! Hotan!”

“Eh?” Looking down the hall, he could see Annie walking up with another letter in her hand. “Hey Annie! Another note? This is getting ridiculous.”

“I couldn’t get a hold of you, but your sponsor stopped by again! He left like an hour ago.” She was blushing as she grinned to herself. “Sorry you missed him again.”

“It’s ok, but thanks.” Taking the letter, he paused when he recalled how Geliah and Talib looked. They don’t really come by as the average person. “Hey, did you notice anything unusual about him? Besides the tattoo?”

“No, he seems like every other guy, like I said the other night. Only thing is he’s got are these purple eyes, but a very sweet personality.” She blushed, looking away from him. “And I can’t really say much more, except that tattoo of a deer on his back is pretty hot. I’ve never seen that good of tribal work.”

“His tattoo...” He furrowed his brow at her. He is definitely an immortal with a tribal buck tattoo.

She shook her head. “I can handle myself, so stop worrying about me. Anyway, I know this is your first sponsor, but my love life has nothing to do with it. Strangers meet and get together all the time.”

Hotan rolled his eyes at her and replied, “Just don’t get your heart broken over this guy.” Annie, it’s not always about you when I fade into my thoughts.

“I won’t.” She started to walk away. “Don’t feel bad that you haven’t met him. I hope that you don’t mind that I might start dating him. He’s so dreamy!”

Annie disappeared down the stairs as his thoughts started back up. Dating my so-called sponsor does seem rather fast, Annie. Who is this Jacob guy? What element does the stag represent?

He finished unlocking his door, pondering a moment as he sat on his couch. Opening the letter, he continued, who in the hell is he? I can’t believe he’s dating Annie. What kind of element could he be? Is it possible he used his powers on Annie? Why is he delivering the letters in the first place, not just coming by, and saying hi? Why would Talib send someone else? It can’t be just because of the way he looks. Then again, there is no mistaking we may be related. I’m sure he has his reasons. For now, I should go with Jacob being my sponsor. Just go along with their plan.

He unfolded the letter:

Hotan,

I know you are still shaken from your encounter with Geliah and the idea that Kyle is an immortal as well. Sorry I cannot deliver these letters in person. Jacob will pose as a sponsor for the time being until we can sort everything out. It will make things less suspicious, since I wish to be able to provide you with some help. Please do not see the financial support as a means of forcing you into anything. It will be a while before I am able to meet with you again. You can confide in Jacob, so feel free to ask him for any help you may need.

My Apologies,

Talib

Leaning back, Hotan considered what he could possibly ask Jacob. Looking across his tiny living room at his entertainment center, the radio sounded like a chance to attempt to unwind. The idea of music was much more appealing. Laying the letter on the coffee table, he stepped over it to turn on the radio. He sat back down, looking over to his left at the large window. Between it and the couch was the doorway to his bedroom, which seemed abandoned lately. Listening to the ending of Chevelle’s The Red, the announcer came on with her signature enthusiasm:

“Hi, this is your 6’o clock DJ, Becky! It’s a lovely Saturday evening and I have some awesome news for all the local bands! The Big Band will be held in a few months, a showdown of local rock bands! The top winner will receive a record deal from P & D Record company! So come down to the studio and grab an application!” She spoke clearly but it soon faded as his thoughts began to take him away again.

I completely forgot about the Big Band competition, the biggest battle of the bands event of the year. Every year I look forward to it but it almost disgusts me it came up during all of this chaos. Maybe I should cancel the idea of competing. Trying to get the band ready for this and figure out this crazy shit about immortals and elements; it’s overwhelming. Then again, it would keep my mind off this crap that’s been dropped in my lap. Yea, that sounds like a great idea. Keep my mind on something else for a while when this gets tiring. I guess I should go sign us up for it then, sort of my way of guaranteeing an escape. At least I can reserve that much normalcy in my dwindling life.

Stretching, he took off his shirt tossing it to the side. His bedroom was dark, but he kept it that way. There was no purpose having light in a room if he couldn’t see color. Flopping down on his messy futon mattress that lay on the floor, he looked up at a TOOL poster. The poster blocked off the only window in the room, helping his belief in complete bleakness for the colorblind. Most of the space in the small room was covered in books and piles of clothes. No carpet on the floor, just the hard concrete met his bare feet.

He closed his eyes, allowing himself to relax, urging himself that he needed to rest. Sleep took over and he started to dream as the last of his senses became numb.

Hotan was sitting at a table under an excruciatingly bright spotlight that made his eyes sting. Looking around, everything was in color. The yellowish color of the wood on the huge bookshelves encircled him there at the table. Several dark, eerie aisles spread out from where he was sitting. Some movement caught his attention to his right, the light above him hindering his ability to focus on anything beyond the table. His heart thudded against his chest as he recalled how the other dream always ended.

Is this another version I haven’t experienced yet?

“I need to tell you where to go to find answers. I am sorry I left you on this earth without the knowledge of my past.” Narrowing his eyes, a darkened figure stood just shy of the light. “This is my responsibility, and I cannot let you suffer for mistakes I have made.”

Hotan watched as a copy of himself walked out with bright blue eyes. A thick red leather bound book slid across the table in front of him. Chills ran down his spine as he watched his doppelganger shift nervously, seeming anxious.

Is this my former self? Why is he so nervous? Something doesn’t seem right, I have knots in my stomach and I can’t shake the feeling that…

“You’re Hotan.” He paused a moment in astonishment, still baffled by the stranger who looked identical to him. “My former self, the person I am reincarnated after.”

“Yes, I am the last of what remains of myself. You will never see me again, unless some sort of miracle happens. You are the rebirth of the element itself. I willingly ended my own life in order to create a new life. In doing so I was able to strengthen the powers of Rebirth.” Sighing he slid the book over to him, a heavy burden could be seen in his tired blue eyes. “I recommend for you to find this book. It’s called the ‘Book of Ancients’ and contains our history, where we came from, and what we became. There may be answers that can aid you as you come into your immortality. I no longer exist outside of this dream. The last of my soul will be swallowed by your own soul in order to complete the Rebirth and complete your transformation in becoming immortal.

In this book, there is written history of the individuals of our tribe and their elements. You may not know who they are, but this will give you knowledge that I was unable to carry over. It is crucial as their leader, and the main element, to know who is responsible for which elements.”

“Then answer this for me; How come I can’t use the powers? Why do I not feel anything?” Hotan looked at him with a stern glare. He needed advice; moreover, he needed the guidance from the one person who held the answers. It had to be the man who held the abilities originally who knew what had happened and what was currently going to be happening. “I don’t understand that. Something tells me they still have not shown themselves to me. Is that your doing? Because you are still here spiritually, are you holding it back? Talib doesn’t even know what’s going on. Isn’t he your brother?”

“Our powers are triggered by what we desire the most. I know my own desires, but yours are different. I am not you.” The old Hotan’s blue eyes faded off to some long ago time of pain. A look Hotan himself knew all too well after losing his mother so suddenly. “Your power surpasses my own in many ways. It works completely different and nothing I say can help you, or even Talib, in your own discovery of your abilities. I can only hope that you choose to do good with your powers.”

“What I desire? I don’t desire anything, and I don’t think my current needs and wants are sufficient triggers. If they had been, I definitely would have noticed something by now. My life has barely started in comparison to an immortal. I have no experience in what true desire is. Not to mention Geliah threatening my life.”

“Sometimes that desire is complex, and it may even scare you what it may actually be. It is a reflection of our deepest and darkest wants and not always something innocent per say. You have a stronger sense of life than I ever had, and I wish I could bestow you with all the memories I have acquired. There is so much I wish to share with you, but my time here is done.” He stood up, far too eager to leave as he nodded goodbye to Hotan. “This is good bye, child. I wish you good fortune and much bravery. I, on the other hand, am too heartbroken to be any use for you. My very being was weathered down and shattered years ago. My soul will fade further into your own and my self-awareness will no longer exist. From here on, I will not be able to protect you as I have done in the past. It all falls on you to figure out how to handle the new form Rebirth has become.”

“Wait!” Jerking up from the table, he watched him disappear back into the darkness of the aisle way. A poster of TOOL took the place of the black aisle way as he sat there on his mattress. Sharp, paralyzing pain shot through his head. Eyes squinted, he clenched his teeth trying not to scream in agony. After a few minutes, it became shallow and barely noticeable. This absorption of another soul was a painful event, and it brought back memories of growing up where he had experienced agonizing headaches.

All that time of assuming it was related to my colorblindness. Were the migraines caused by the Old Hotan? If it’s this painful for me to absorb him, then what has he been experiencing? My soul is slowly devouring his, one small piece at a time. Shivers rattled his shoulder as the last thought hit his nerves.

Stiff and wobbly, he made his way into his living room. It was nighttime and the neighborhood lay in silence under its dark blanket. The clock read 11:44 PM. He moaned, wiping sweat from his face, his thoughts spiraled in dizzying circles that led nowhere.

A laundry basket sat in the corner, reminding him he had chores to do. He quickly picked up piles of clothes, desperate for a distraction. Stuffing them all in the basket, he headed out and down the stairs. Passing Annie’s room, he found the laundry room. With all his clothes crammed into the washer, he freely poured an obscure amount of detergent. He slammed it shut, turned it on, and leaned his back against it. Disgruntled that he would be left alone to his thoughts again.

A lighter flicked three times, breaking his concentration and thoughts. A tall man came just around the doorway lighting a cigarette, leaning his right shoulder against the doorway. The man’s button-up shirt laid open and staring at Hotan with purple eyes in the bland grey of the room around them. With slight curiosity and wonder, Hotan thought in silence.

Purple eyes? Could this man be Jacob? I hate being colorblind and seeing colors at random. I hate that I know what the name of the color is, purple. What a schmuck coming in here all suave like.

“You’re Hotan, right?” The man’s voice was low and soft as he ran his left hand through his short spikey hair, releasing a puff of smoke from his lips. “Hotan, right?”

“Yea, why you ask?” Hotan narrowed his eyes at him. This has to be Jacob. “And you are?”

“Oh, just heard about you. That’s all.” Pushing himself off the doorway, he opened the dryer, pulling out some sheets. “Nice to meet you, Hotan. Sorry, was doing late night laundry. Won’t bother you anymore, night.”

“Night…” Hotan watched as he disappeared followed by a trail of smoke. He had ignored answering the question as to who he was.

Heard about me? I can’t shake the feeling that he was Jacob. Maybe he’s pulling information about me from Annie.

Sighing, he wondered why he happened to be a topic in any conversation. Sitting on top of the washer, he continued his random chain of thoughts. He went back and forth from simple school life back to the chaos. Finally, he recalled what the DJ had said right before he fell asleep.

Last year I wanted to compete in the Big Band, but I didn’t meet the minimum age requirement.

This year he was eighteen. He had a chance at making at least the top three with the added advantage of improving his guitar skills for one more year.

One problem, I’m short a bass player since Shellie is only seventeen. He sighed again rethinking all the rules.

It required each group to have a minimum of three people. Unfortunately, Hisota was only a lead vocalist and didn’t do anything else except be a nuisance. He would have to throw an audition at the club and find a bassist that way. Once they found someone, they would decide on the songs that they would perform. The washer buzzed and he chucked the wet clothes into the dryer. Back upstairs, he shuffled into his room, flopping on the mattress. Lying on his belly, he fell asleep peacefully.

Knocking on his door brought him out of his sleep. Swaying pass his couch, he opened the door, leaning on its frame. Annie smiled sweetly and handed another letter to him. Closing the door, he walked into the kitchen, grabbing a glass from the cabinet. Lumbering over to the fridge, he pulled out a carton of orange juice to fill it. Gulping it down, he finally picked the letter back up. Inside he found a short message in a stockier, all capitals writing:

JUST WANTED TO SAY HI LAST NIGHT. YOU LOOKED IRRITATED SO I LEFT.

JACOB

Crumpling the letter, he huffed as he threw it in the trash. The glass clanked into the sink as he grabbed his empty laundry basket, annoyed by the note.

What a douchebag.

Returning to the laundry room for his clothes, he debated over his thoughts on Jacob.

He’s not like Talib at all. Suave, flirty, and worse, careless. What happens if trouble starts and that’s who I have to back me up in a pinch?

Geliah’s grin crawled its way across his mind and he shuddered uncontrollably.

I knew who he was just by the flood of emotions that washed over me. I had a similar reaction with Talib when I met him. What’s odd, I never had a reaction with Kyle like that. Is it because he hasn’t awakened? Desire is the key to unlocking the elements. There is too much in my life for me to waste my time focusing on things I want or desire. I guess I would have more luck finding this Book of Ancients. It can’t be too hard to find a book, but, then again, how often does someone find something from a dream?

Flustered, he pulled out his cell phone and started flipping through the contacts. Pushing the talk button he waited for someone to answer:

“Hello?” A groggy voice mumbled over the line. “Mmm, who is it?”

“Kyle, what are you doing today, man?” Hotan leaned against his wall. “I’ll need your help.”

“Nothing. Jessica is working this morning and planning on helping her dad move after that.” Yawning and groaning invaded the phone for a minute. “Why? What’s up?”

“Well, I have some clues and a possible source for answers. I was wondering if you wanted to come and help me find it.” Looking across the room, he watched a dove land on the windowsill and stare at him.

“Hell yea!” There were sounds of items falling followed by breaking glass. “Oops.”

“Good. Be there in 20 minutes.” He smiled as he watched the dove fly away. I have a good feeling about this.

Chapter Eight

Hanging up the phone, he snatched up his helmet, heading out onto the street. Rottweilers in the nearby junkyard barked and lurched out as he took off onto the busy highway. Increasing the acceleration, he could feel the front tire rise and hit the ground again near the third gear. The wind pushed against him as he leaned into the turns of his route. It was a rare moment where he left his thoughts behind and enjoyed the ride. Smoothly swerving through traffic, he soon stopped in front of a beige house. Wasting no time to strap on Hotan’s spare helmet, Kyle climbed onto the back of the bike.

After driving through the skyscrapers for a while, they made it to an old white building. This was the main library for the area, and their best chances of getting a good start of where to locate the Book of Ancients. They walked up the huge row of steps and entered into the dark dusty building of silence.

The librarian cleared her throat, demanding their attention for a moment as she nodded to the Keep Quiet sign on her desk. She looked like she was well into her sixties, sitting in a little desk staring at them with a twisted face. Their very presence seems to be ruining the old woman’s day as they stopped at her desk.

“Man! I don’t know why I insist riding on the back of that rice burner! My nuts get all crammed!” Kyle’s words bounced off the walls of the building as he grabbed at his crotch. “Why didn’t we take my car?”

“Stop it.” Hotan’s face turned red as he stared back at the annoyed librarian. Please stop embarrassing me Kyle! It’s bad enough this woman makes me feel like I am on trial. “Excuse me. I was wondering if you might have a very old book called the ‘Book of Ancients’? It’s possibly older than the town itself. Do you have any books like that here?”

“The Book of Ancients?” Pushing her bulky glasses up on her nose, she contorted her lips to the right side of her face. “Never heard of it. We have books that old, but that’s not one of them.”

“Umm,” His forehead creased as he looked at her. I think that is the most preposterous answer I’ve gotten this month. “I’d feel more confident about your answer if you’d at least attempt to search the card catalog or something. You can’t possibly know every book in this library. I’ll be more than happy to do it myself if you are too busy. Just let me know where to start looking.”

“You don’t want to make him angry, lady.” Kyle leaned over her desk, a serious look on his face. “Start answering.”

“Fine.” The old woman narrowed her eyes. Opening her desk drawer, she handed an old rusty key to Hotan. “If it’s as old as you say, then walk to the back of that middle aisle there. Follow the path until you hit a dead end that has a gate to the right containing a spiral stairway. It leads to the attic. That’s where the original library’s collection is kept from when the town was a small colony. When you’re done, lock the gate and return the key. Be careful, no one’s been up there in years.”

“Thanks.” He walked down the dark aisle way passing a college girl, her hair in a tight bun filled with pencils.

She is completely engrossed with that book she’s flipping through. I don’t think she even noticed we had to squeeze past her.

Her glasses were falling off her nose as she closed the book and added it to her stack. She fumbled with her armful of books and started to lose them as the top one hit the floor. Kyle took a second to help her out, winking at her as she sighed in relief.

I’ve heard of a bookworm, but she takes the cake. Too bad Kyle stopped to help; I was going to see how far she was going to make it before dropping another one.

He smirked as he waited for Kyle to catch up to him.

Making their way to the dead end, a rusty gated section awaited. Unlocking the gate, Hotan jerked it open. It groaned in protest, exposing the stairs it protected. It was an understatement to say it hadn’t been open for years. He took one soft step on the rust covered stairs. They creaked in response. Testing his weight, he cautiously made his way up to the top where a heavy oak door waited for their arrival.

The attic was dark as he eased it open, against the will of its stiff hinges. Light barely entered the room due to the amount of dust that caked itself on the window. Kyle entered behind him. Not able to see anything beyond his feet, Hotan was perplexed as Kyle brushed past him.

Where does he think he is going? I can’t see anything besides the faint glow of an old attic window.

“Whoa! And I thought my room was a mess!” Kyle’s steps went deeper into the dark musky room. “It stinks in here. How old is this crap?”

“What?” Hotan took a deep breath full of the dust-filled air. Coughing, trying to focus his eyes, he saw nothing. “How can you see? I can’t even make out my own hands.” Are my eyes getting that bad? I didn’t think being colorblind made me inept at night vision.

“Huh? You can’t see?” Kyle’s steps moved to the right followed by a click. A bulb flickered on, hesitant to light the room. “Is that better?”

“Yea.” Looking around, stacks of cobweb-covered books lined the narrow attic. “This is going to be hell to go through. No one’s been up here in a very long time.”

“Hmm.” Kyle began to walk down the aisle way looking at all the stacks. “Well, the good news is that the stacks are all starting with the same letter. It might take us a few minutes to find the B’s. Here’s H.”

“Good. At least its organized chaos. Maybe my luck is starting to change after all.” Hotan started with a stack on his right and began working his way to the window. “Here’s S, J, found them! Here’s the B’s! Come help me look through these. It looks like there are two stacks of them.”

“Sweet!” Kyle knelt next to one stack. “Now what’s the name of this book we’re looking for?”

“It’s called the ‘Book of Ancients’.” He took one book at a time reading the titles. “It’s not in this stack, nothing even close to that title. I was hoping I would get lucky, but all I see is a billion copies of Beowulf and the Bible in both of these piles. No wonder they sent these to the attic. I don’t think it’s practical to have more than ten copies of these on the shelf of a library.”

“No way, there has to be like another stack of B’s around here. Here’s the T section, but it’s about the same with copies of Tale of Two Cities and Treasure Island.” Kyle started scouring through nearby stacks. “Man this sucks. It’s like we found the old English class books.”

“There isn’t signs of a mixed pile, and it seems they are all in title order. I already looked through the rest on this side.” Huffing, Hotan mulled over his thoughts as he glared at the dusty towers of books. Why did I think it would be this easy to find? “Figures, wishful thinking I suppose on my part, sorry.”

“Man.” Crossing his arms, Kyle scrunched his nose as he thought long and hard. “Maybe Jessica might have an idea of where we can look next. She reads stuff all the time. You should see the bookshelves of classic literature at her house, dude. In fact, she should still be at the restaurant, if we hurry.”

“I’m hungry anyways. Let’s go.” I need to come up with a game plan. I can’t keep rushing into things like this. If I wasn’t acting crazy before, I am definitely looking the part now. Hotan rubbed the back of his neck, trying to relieve the tension.

They headed back down the rusted spiral stairway, locking the gate behind them. Through the towering shelves of books, they passed the college girl once more. She waved as she lipped another ‘thank you’ to Kyle who nodded in acknowledgement. Hotan handed the key back to the librarian. Grinning in victory, she dropped the key back into the drawer. Hotan still thanked her for her time. At least he knew her word was indeed solid. Their next stop, the diner.

I’m supposed to find a book that I don’t even know if it truly exist. It was just a dream. Does this book exist? Maybe the stress is starting to get to me and I’m losing my mind. I wish I could say I was crazy. I hate feeling obligated to solve this insane mystery, but I can’t shake this instinctual sensation that there is some truth to all of this. Every time I attempt to convince myself this is a hoax, it boils over and overrides every logical thought. At least I have my best friend to help me through this. We just have no way of getting through it any faster.

They parked on the sidewalk in front of Benny’s Place. Sitting at their usual booth, Hotan stared out the window that looked out onto the street. Jessica greeted them warmly, taking their orders.

“Coffee.” Hotan needed something to keep himself moving at this rate.

“A Hamburger with a side of fries.” Kyle never ordered anything other than a hamburger and fries, no matter where they went.

Handing the order over to the cook, she grabbed up a coffee up and carafe, returning to them.

“Hey where’s mine?” exclaimed Kyle as he watched Jessica pour Hotan a cup of coffee.

“You can wait your turn. What? Would you rather have coffee?” Jessica laughed as she sat down next to him. “So what are you two up to today?”

“Looking for this really old book.” Rubbing the back of his head, Kyle gave her his best puppy dog eyes. “But we don’t know where we can find it at. We’ve had no luck.”

“Did you try the big library?” She looked over at Hotan who took a sip of his coffee. “They have a rare books section. Most libraries do.”

“Yea.” He looked up at her. “But they didn’t have it so now we don’t know where to look next. If you have any place in mind let us know.”

“Really?” Jessica propped her elbow onto the table and rested her head in her hand. “Hmm, no not really.”

“Oh well.” Kyle leaned back, watching her leave. “Another dead end.”

“Sorry I can’t help you guys.” A bell rang from the kitchen and she came back swiftly with Kyle’s drink and meal. “Enjoy, babe!”

“It was worth a try.” Kyle grinned at his plate as it slid in front of him. “Thanks! I’m starving!”

“Thank you, Jessica.” Taking another sip, Hotan froze as he stared out of the window. “Maybe my luck is about to change.” I didn’t have to go looking for it, it just had to find me.

Hotan looked across the street at a sign with its paint bleeding down in bright red. It simply said ‘SALE’. The forgotten bookstore was a short building compared to its neighbors and much older. A clutter of cobweb-covered books filled the store’s windows and it seemed dark inside. He had noticed the little store before, but never thought about visiting it. Everyone had assumed it was a closed business, because no one ever witnessed customers going in or out of the place. After all the times they sat there staring at it, lost in thought, no signs of life were ever evident. Strange that a sign would be out on the sidewalk on the day he started to look for the ‘Book of Ancients’. Beckoning him to walk in, he could not break his stare from those red letters that shouted over the greys of the landscape around it.

“I’ll be right back.” He sat his coffee down. “Something’s been brought to my attention.”

Did you set this up for me, Hotan? How much of this failed reincarnation did you plan ahead of time? Why is this not in the hands of your brother, Talib? What kind of mistakes did you make that are still washing up this far into the present day? Did you really think deleting yourself from existence would make everything go away? I’m no immortal, but even I know drastic measures only create bigger problems. What did you do?

A gust of wind blew his gray bangs into his eyes, blocking his view. Brushing them back, he gathered enough nerve to head across the street. Pausing, he looked down at the red letters with curiosity.

Who is this person? How did they know I was looking for the book? That is what this is all about right? I only barely started my own efforts and here is a sign shouting at me to look here.

Taking in a deep breath, he gathered the courage to enter the mysterious bookshop. A bell rang to announce his entry into the stale smelling room. The small store was occupied with dusty books, the atmosphere dark and heavy. It simply had one overcrowded aisle way bordered by overloaded bookshelves. A desk by the entrance was the only sign of a spot to make a purchase. There were no signs of anyone being there. Leaning against the desk, he watched the store’s door, waiting for someone to show up.

Perhaps they stepped out to go get some lunch? I mean, who would dare to rob this place? Everyone thinks the joint is closed, and last I checked, no one steals books.

“There you are!” The voice shouted from behind him, causing him to jerk away from what he assumed was a vacant desk. “You are late!”

“What the!” Staring wide-eyed, a dark haired girl grinned wildly at him. She crawled up from the ground and stood behind the desk. Cobwebs and dust laid against her black shirt, as if she had been one of the books. “Where did you come from? Who or what are you?”

“Been waiting for you!” She glared at him through her glasses and held a dusty book in her arms. Nothing he had asked seemed to matter to her as her unnatural moment of glee continued. “You’re running late, mister-mister.”

“Waiting? Right, and you are?” He swallowed the last of his nerves. Maybe I was wrong to come here. This poor lady has lost her mind, she’s clearly in need of medication. It all makes sense why no one dares to look at the place, let alone some inside here. “What’s your name? And why have you been waiting on me? Who do you think I am?”

“Tiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnaaaaaaaaaa.” Squeezing the book in her arms, she twisted side-to-side in bliss. “My name’s Tina. You’re so silly, how could you forget my name, hahahaha.”

“Tina.” He blinked. “Well, I saw the sign out front.” Do I really want to ask her about this? I mean, would I even get a legitimate answer from an insane person? She thinks we’ve met before.

“It was for you. I knew you’d come if I made you a pretty sign. You like it?” Hotan jerked as she slams the book onto the desk. Clouds of dust rolled across the desk before settling as she spoke, “Here’s my Baby. Isn’t it beautamis? You have to be nice to her. I like you. You’re different. He said you would be different! The same, but not the same, yes, yes, yes. He never lies about these things!”

“Huh?” He slowly approached the counter refusing to take his eyes off her Cheshire cat grin. “Man. You’re a little obsessed with this book, and a little, crazy too. So someone told you I was coming for this?”

She’s acting like she knew I was coming. Not only that, she was told I was coming. Part of me wants to ask her a billion questions, but it’s obvious I wouldn’t get a straight answer, if any at all, from her.

“Maybe, maybe not.” Her face went serious as she slid the book over to him. “You hurt her, you die. Take as long as you need with this, but she must come back. Must, must-must!”

“Ok.” Reading the title of the book, he paled. The worn-out embossing was still visible enough to read Book of Ancients. “How did you know I was looking for this book? This is the ‘Book of Ancients’. Who told you I needed this book? Who told you?”

Is there someone else watching me? This can’t be coincidental. This all happened within twelve hours, maybe I can track down who is pulling the strings!

“Because I’m one of you.” She whispered, leaning closer as if telling a grand secret. “I’m the crazy one! Just be sure to bring her back. She’s my book, he said I could be its new owner as long as I let the new him, the different him, read it. When you bring her back, bring me chocolate. You have to bring me chocolate! I want chocolate for being a good girl! Bring her back with my chocolate!”

“The new one? Chocolate?” He lifted an eyebrow.

I’m not going to get any answers from her, but clearly someone knew that a new immortal would be looking for this. Did the old Hotan really plan this? Is it possible he gave her the book before he? Forget it. I’ll need to look at the book to see if I can find some answers.

Curious, he continued the conversation. “Why chocolate, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Yes!” She slammed her hands on the desk sending more clouds of dust into the dry air. “And! If you don’t return it. I will come for it. And I want my chocolate! Or I will follow you until you give it to me!”

“Don’t worry, I’ll bring your book back and bring you some chocolate.” He took the book, wiping the dust off the red cover. There’s no doubt. This is the exact same book from my dream. What secrets are you not sharing, Hotan? “See you later, Tina. Thank you for helping me find this.”

“Have a very gloomy day!” She waved at him as he left out the door. “Aww, him and the different one are gone now.”

Hotan crossed the street, stopping at his bike for a book bag in the compartment under the seat. He slid the book into the empty book bag, slinging it over his left shoulder. Returning inside the restaurant, he sighed in relief. Kyle’s mouth was full, but he shot Hotan a questioning face. He grinned in response as a sign that he got what he wanted. Glancing over at the bookstore, he watched Tina kick her sign around the sidewalk before ripping it apart. She was a complete mental case as she paused to bark at an old woman who made the mistake to stop and stare. Returning to her store, the sign pieces promptly fluttered away on the wind, the letter on it no longer red to his eyes.

“Why are you so happy all of a sudden?” Jessica came back to the table pouring him more coffee in a fresh cup. “Did we miss something?”

“I found it. It was in that little book store.” He took a sip enjoying the steamy cup of coffee. “I can’t believe it was so close after all.”

“No way!” Kyle swallowing the last of his food. “You mean that insane chick had it? That place gives me the creeps. The whole town talks about how there’s a mad woman who runs the store!”

“Yea, well I’ve never heard anything about the place, but she had it.” He cracked his neck, relieving it of the tension it had endured. “She’s crazy. No doubt about that.”

“Well, glad you found it.” Jessica smiled, grabbing Kyle’s empty plate. “So what’s the book about?”

“I don’t know yet, but someone suggested it for a research project I have. Well, time to start reading and seeing if it was really worth all the trouble.” Hotan took one last sip of his coffee before laying enough cash for both meal and tip on the table. “I want to see what kind of information this book has and if it can help me out.”

“Bye Babe!” Jessica blew Kyle a kiss as they headed for the door. “Have a good day!”

“Bye Je-” Kyle slammed into the door that had closed behind Hotan. “Ouch!”

“Oh hell no!” Jessica busted out laughing as he fumbled with the door, managing not to further harm himself. “So freaking clumsy.”

Getting back onto the bike, they headed for the main highway. Pulling away from the red light, Hotan noticed a slight red image reflecting in one of his mirrors. Looking back, he could see Hisota’s black Yamaha with red flames trying to catch up to them.

Not sure why he would be giving me colors, but then again, I don’t need his crap right now. I have the book, I don’t want to waste time tending to Hisota’s tantrums. I’m going to have to try and lose him in this traffic. I hate doing this, it’s just asking for an accident to happen, but…

“Hang on tight, Kyle. I’m going to lose Hisota.” Kyle tightened his hold.

Leaning into the bike, Hotan started accelerating through the traffic. He swerved passed the vehicles as cautiously as possible, gaining distance between them and Hisota. The cars felt as if they were sitting still as the wind roared around them. Making it through a yellow light, they had managed to leave Hisota behind. The stopping vehicles had blocked Hisota in, making his attempts to follow them further futile. Hotan redirected their route and headed for Kyle’s house.

I am positive he’ll head straight to my apartment after seeing me with Kyle. It was pure luck I could see the red and orange of the flames on his bike. Otherwise, my colorblindness would have hindered my ability to pick him out. I suppose my mind agrees with my feelings of keeping any additional stress at arm’s length for the time being.

“Thought we were headed to your place?” Kyle unlocked his door, the house empty while his parents were out doing their normal routine. “What happened? Change of plans?”

“Change of plans. Hisota knows where I live, but not where you live. In fact, he’s always refused coming to your place for some reason.” He followed him to the back of the hallway. “I’m not in the mood to deal with him today. This is more important to me then catering to one of his rants, again.”

I need to know what this book is going to tell me. What sort of information does this thing have? Why was is so important I use it?

Closing the door behind him, a playboy smiled at Hotan from her poster. He looked at it for a moment, shrugged, and turned back to the task of seeing what mysteries the ‘Book of Ancients’ held. The bedroom consisted of a chaotic closet, a messy twin sized bed, and a desk with a lamp. Sitting at the desk, he pulled out the book.

Kyle, who flopped across his bed, sat up and watched as Hotan thumbed through the aged pages. They were yellow, stiff, and fragile. Being delicate with the age worn paper, Hotan came to the first chapter. The entire book was hand-written and appeared to be a personal journal. Kyle leaned over Hotan’s shoulders a moment as he started to read.

Book of Ancients: The Beginning

In the beginning, we were nothing more than a tribe. We were spirited people fighting to survive. History has rubbed out our existence, but there were truly thirteen tribes of Israel. A lot of us died, more were enslaved, but we survivors were the few who did not fall under these fates. Labeled as the Levites, Sons of Levi, we were known for our abilities in diplomacy and priests. The land we called home had been given to us in good faith, despite beliefs we were not landowners. It would be years later when fear and greed would destroy this act of kindness. A time in history marked with my people being enslaved to the tabernacle, their freedoms forgotten.

At the time of this enslavement, there were two brothers in charge of the village. It had been decided, following the chief’s death, that the younger brother would be head of the tribe while his older brother given the responsibility of being his advisor. It was an unorthodox move and the rate of its success scared the other tribes. Whispers of conspiracy claimed they would soon fall under the control of our small tribe spread like a plague of locust. Fear was devouring hearts as it spread. It wasn’t long before communications went silent. Our brothers and sisters in the nearby territories had stopped sending any messages.

The elders within our tribe were arguing over if any action should be taken to check on the status of our silenced priests and diplomats in neighboring lands. In the end, no action would be allowed. The brothers pleaded that someone attempt contact but none would disobey the elders. This was when the system, the trust in our leadership, failed. Some of the elders had been paid off, promised land for sabotaging any plans of defense. If they would mislead the brothers in trusting the silence, riches would be thrown to them. These elders were among the first targets of the slaughter that was inching ever closer to our home. Shadows grew closer, and we had failed to push the issue further despite the nightmares, the sensations that wrenched our guts every night.

I believe these events were happening at the timeframe of 928 BCE, according to modern history books. Upon a spring festival, the other tribes rushed in, sinking their fangs deep into the village. People, children even, were slaughtered. Any signs of refusal to comply with demands led to losing one’s life. The general, an exiled Levite from our ranks, made a personal effort to locate the brothers. His only desire was to take vengeance for the excommunication given to him by their father. With what little time they had, Hotan and Talib gathered who they could to flee the land they once called home. Screams of their loved ones echoed behind them, beckoning that they come to their rescue. Haunting images of an elder groveling at the feet of the general. Bleeding, dying, he kept screaming, “Where’s my land! I kept my promise! Where’s my gold! I did what was asked of me! I earned my place!”

When did the Devil snake his way into the hearts of the people? Why did I not see it?

The journey to freedom had its own costs and horrors. Crossing the dry lands led to death by thirst, exhaustion, and even at one point, a pack of starving lions stalked us, picking off any who fell too far behind. The sea was not a comforting sight as the salty air stung at our blistered skin. The water only brought more fear and death. Our lives were cursed, the land around us a plague, killing us in its slow and painful method. We had stalled here for some time, trying to decide what would salvage what was left of our existence. Our choices became death by drowning or eaten alive by the four-legged vultures that circled within view. We had started with roughly one hundred of us, but less than half continued the struggle to live. Still catching our breaths, we were forced to cross the sea when the army appeared on the horizon. The exiled Levite was fueled by the devil himself to have chased us over such treacherous land. Reluctantly, we took to the sea.

The sun was blistering on the water more so than it had been on land. A breeze added to the torment as salt stung at our wounds and cracked skin. We all stared at one another, watching as some drifted off to an eternal sleep, freeing themselves from the torture we found ourselves trapped in. Thoughts of purgatory rattled our minds, one man leaping into the water, willingly drowning himself to escape his rotting flesh. Storm clouds had rolled over us so quickly that it had felt like a dream. Lightning boiled the water where it struck around us and the waves grew to the size of mountains. This was Purgatory. We were neither dead or living.

This was the last test given to us. This horrendous act of nature would separate who was worthy and who would not survive the night. Many of us lost what we had left when we washed to shore. The pain that weighed on our hearts those first days on the island will forever stain our souls. Only twenty of us had made it.

Twenty.

I would not even consider it surviving after so much blood, sweat, and tears. This was the new beginning with the past cut savagely into our minds. Faces of loved ones still haunt our dreams. Gruesome last moments and memories of one another’s suffering was the last stride of who we were as a tribe. Why were we punished so? To what purpose to leave so few alive? Why was God angry with us? Or was this a sign of his mercy? So many questions flooded my heart. A heart left broken from losing my wife, carrying our child, in the storm that left only me alive. I will never be able to know the blessing of holding my own child in my hands.

The island was a paradise. We referred to it as Eden, since it was so much like the stories read or told to us as children. Food and shelter were easily acquired, but the guilt of being the only survivors could be seen on every face. Shoulders heavy, we focused on mending and strengthening what we had been left with. It was slow at first, we didn’t notice that we were changing, becoming immortal. Our dedication to survival had distracted us from the passing of time, and soon we were discovering new abilities. Was this a reward for making it so far? As I write this retelling, I can assure you, it was a curse in the end. A continuation of Purgatory that would not allow us to be claimed by Death. I would have gladly fallen into hell than accept what was given to me.

Speaking without words was the first phenomenon. It was confusing as to how long we had been doing it without acknowledging the process. The natural sensation of using it was frightening, but we soon realized the importance in being able to contact each other so easily despite the distance apart. Cassandra was the first to discover the other special ability she had been given. She had been frustrated with her crops, attempts to domesticate the plants here had proven difficult. In anger, she struck the ground, causing seedlings to become full-grown, fruiting plants. We all gathered to watch her first few failed attempts to recreate this miraculous moment. Insisting that she had done it, she described the power she had felt flowing through her. She failed to perform this act a second time. Gathering her focus, she replayed the emotions and thoughts in her heart and struck the ground. Markings painted her skin and she had a miraculous glow, the glow of saints about her. After that, we became more cautious, more aware of what we were doing and how nature itself reacted to us.

We had become embodiments of nature and humanity. There were ten elements of Nature and ten elements of Humanity. Nature consisted of the Mind, Body, and Spirit as its strongest point but Rebirth was the all-encompassing factor. This also included six elements: fire, earth, wind, light, water, and metal. The elements of humanity involved factors that could go as far as persuading one’s heart if forced. These were labelled as fear, anger, lust, judgment, insanity, and clarity. Lastly, the remaining three elements were related to the body: sight, hearing, and touch. These elements could be manipulated to one extreme or the other. Touch could numb you or make the slightest breeze feel excruciatingly painful to grace your skin. Earth could change soil, make plants grow or even decay. Rebirth could rewind or speed up a life span as it sees fit, or even go as far as reincarnation.

I could not say how many centuries had passed us when we made the decision to leave our Eden. We wanted to use our abilities to aid our fellow man, show God that we withheld no grudges in hopes that we would one day be welcomed into Heaven. Immortal, we were truly in Purgatory, and we vowed to repent. We wished to shed the curse of never-ending life and followed the teachings we knew from heart. With the ability to perform miracles, we sought to do the world good. Unfortunately, we only found chaos. The world had turned violent in our absence, and our efforts fueled new wars. Our return brought centuries of disasters and death to those living mortal lives. Please forgive our ignorance. We were no better than children as we squabbled the land, not realizing how devastating the smallest use of our abilities could cause.

Tired of our miseries, Hotan aimed to shield his people. It was not fair that the others were being punished for his own faults. They debated for quite some time before everyone agreed to what was being offered. With the use of the powers of Rebirth, he could wash their souls clean; bring them close to mortality in an endless cycle of reincarnation. They would not know themselves or each other. It was a means of blending back into the rhythm of the world, leaving behind the memories of their cursed life. One would have to stay behind, be left out of this spell to watch over them. The fear of awakening, possibly not remembering themselves and causing more disasters, pulled at all of them. Talib, one of the chieftain brothers and element of Judgment, volunteered to stay behind. May God bless him and mend the pain that it caused him to watch both his wife, Saphellia, and brother, Hotan, disappear from existence. May my sins be forgiven for what I have done.

Chapter Nine

“That’s deep.” Kyle lay across his bed, furrowing his brow.

“There’s the problem, though. We are under a spell that’s falling apart for some reason. I am Rebirth, and technically, the one who originally cast it.” Hotan closed the book, staring at the old red leather cover. “Regardless of why this is failing, I am slowly becoming immortal. At the rate things are going, eventually it’ll be harder to blend in with normal society. If you never age or die, someone is bound to notice. I wonder how long ago this awakening started. Who was the first to wake up and regain immortality? Maybe we can figure out what went wrong if we can figure out who was the first to snap out of the spell. Perhaps Talib knows. I couldn’t imagine he would not notice another coming into existence again without sensing it.”

“Yea, it does seem strange. Did you lose your powers at some point? A bad reincarnation along the timeline?” Kyle looked at Hotan who stared out the window at doves pecking at the grass. “It has something to do with you right? You’re the reincarnated version of the man who casted this spell in the first place.”

“All I know is that I’m not the Hotan in this book.” With a heavy sigh, he looked back to Kyle. “The Hotan who initiated the spell is dead and I’m what’s left. He used his powers to remake the element of Rebirth, but I don’t know why. He was tight-lipped about the reason he felt the need to do this, other than making the element stronger.”

“What are you saying?” Kyle sat up, digesting the information Hotan was letting loose. “How do you know? You sound like you met him somehow. There can’t be two of you, is there?”

“No there isn’t two of us. I know this about him for the same reason why I knew to look for the book. It wasn’t Talib who told me about it, it was Hotan himself.” He put the book into his book bag. “In a dream, he came to me. I don’t know why, but, something told me it wasn’t an ordinary dream. I could feel something. I can’t seem to find the words to describe what I felt, but it was like a locked section of myself coming to life for that small moment and then fading to nothing.”

“Hold on, you’re not making any sense man.” Kyle watched as Hotan flopped the book bag on, ready to make an exit. “Now you’re talking all crazy again, dude. This is insane.”

“I’ve got to go.” He opened Kyle’s door. “See you tomorrow at school.”

“You better explain to me what the hell you’re talking about.” Kyle watched as he left, closing the door behind him. “This is taking its toll on him, Talib. Why aren’t you helping him?”

The English teacher finished his lecture and passed out dittos. As usual, they were to be finished before class ended. It was one of those casual, laid-back days and the teacher just wanted to relax. Hotan couldn’t complain. It was nice to enjoy some quiet class time for a change. He zoomed through the paper, answering correctly, no studying or flipping through the book like the rest of the class. Shoving it to the side, he took a deep breath. The feeling of mental exhaustion flooded over him. He had no desire to engage himself into anything that may require any thought. Shellie scooted her desk closer and stared at his unusual empty glance, worry written on her face.

“What’s wrong with you? You’ve been really weird here lately and it’s got me worried.” She sighed grabbing his right hand catching his full attention. “Are you ok? Are you still feeling sick?”

“I wish I really knew.” He stared at her hand clasping his. His hand was bigger, her fingers thin and dainty compared to his fat stubby ones. Content with holding hands, he found himself smirking. “I’ve got so much on my mind. I feel like it’s eating me alive, inside out. There’s no longer a definitive line between what’s real or fantasy and it’s frustrating. All I can do is lose myself to my thoughts, driving myself crazy wading through what is fact or fiction. I’m exhausted.”

“It seems that way.” Letting go, she focused on her ditto to avoid the teacher’s glance as she continued to whisper to him. “If there’s anything I can do, let me know. I’m always here. You know you can talk to me. I just want to know what’s going on, even if I can’t help.”

“I’ll be fine.” He laid his head down on his arms, closing his eyes. “Just wish you could help. I’m just so tired. I can’t sleep lately. It’s like my body is slowly losing its want for sleeping and eating. Physically I feel fine, but mentally and emotionally, I miss the break from existence.”

“This is not a group activity you two.” The teacher cleared his throat, watching Shellie scoot her desk back into place. “Thank you, Ms. Hoffman.”

Feeling drained from his life’s crisis, Hotan let himself drift. His mind was constantly asking questions with no answers to be found. Sleeping was impossible with so much left open and unresolved. Worse, was that everything seemed to cycle back to him. He was the problem and the answer, but no one could help him.

Taking a deep breath, his ears took in the sounds of papers rustling and occasionally someone coughing or rustling in their seats. Hunger and sleep on a physical sense hadn’t been hitting him like normal. Waves of anxiety had been hitting him when 12 plus hours had passed and he failed in feeling hungry.

Is this part of becoming immortal? No more sleep or need to eat? Or am I that swamped with this whole chain of events? Please body, just let me sleep so I can just stop thinking. I can’t focus on anything if all I want is to lay my head down and make all these questions stop. If I can get some answers at best, maybe I could get some rest. Where is Talib? Why isn’t he helping me? I haven’t heard, seen, or even gotten a letter from him. What an ass. He came and threw this all in my face, leaving. I would write a note back but I don’t like that Jacob guy. Really ticks me off that Annie’s all in love with him. It’s not right that these immortals play with people’s emotions. Geliah can screw someone for life with the ability to manipulate a person’s sense of fear. This whole ordeal is unfair.

Heavy with his thoughts, they came to a stop as he began to fall asleep.

“Hotan,” He heard a voice call him in the darkness of his mind. “Hotan can you hear me?”

“Who, is this?” No longer could he hear the classroom, Am I dreaming again? Did I finally fall asleep? “What do you want?”

“Hotan,” The voice was new to him, but soft and desperate. “I need you to find me. I need help.”

“Find you? Who are you?” This wasn’t the voice of the old Hotan, nor of anyone he knew of in person. “Why me?”

“I can’t leave from this place until you find me, I am trapped here. I fear for my life. Geliah will not allow me to leave.” The fear in the man’s voice sent chills across Hotan. “My only hope is that you can help me pull out from under his control. I cannot push pass the fear he instills on me, I am too weak.”

“Leave where?” Hotan thought loudly as if shouting out over a great distance. “How can I find you? Geliah is too strong for me to even face!”

“Here, I am here in the city at the…” The voice faded, his mind went silent. Feeling a hand glide across his marking caused him to jerk awake.

“Don’t touch me!” The shout from him bounced off the walls of the classroom. Shellie’s startled face told him all he needed to know. “Shellie, I, sorry, I didn’t mean to shout, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s ok. You scared me.” Her eyes were sad and watery as she gathered her things. “The bell rang, didn’t want you to be late.”

“Uh,” Throwing his things in his book bag, he collected her books from her. “Here, let me carry these.”

“Hotan, I can carry them.” Her voice sounded spiteful as she glared at him. “I’m fine.”

“No, but.” Seeing her anger from her face, he had hurt her feelings in being so abrasive.

The violent reaction had broken her last piece of patience in figuring out what was wrong with him.

I am going to have to try and tell her. Maybe talking about it might help me clear some thoughts.

“I’ve got something to show you. Let’s go someplace and talk.” He whispered, beckoning her to stay close.

“Show me?” She followed him out of the classroom through the crowded hall. “Show me what? Hotan, slow down! Where are we going?”

“Follow me.” Taking a swift turn to the left and out an exit door, he led her through the courtyard. No one was present but the two of them. “I want to show you this. It might help you understand why I’m acting weird. Come on this way. Keep this secret.”

“Show me what? Keep what a secret? You’re scaring me…” She quickened her pace to keep up with him. “Where are we going?”

Keeping quiet, he led her into the school Greenhouse and laid their things on an empty plant table. Far as he could see, they were alone.

“Why did you lead me here?” Closing the door behind her, she stared at him baffled.

“I’ve got to tell you something. It’s about what’s been wrong with me these past few weeks.” I hope she doesn’t tell me I’m crazy. Sighing he continued, “It’s all so irrational, so talking about it just makes me feel crazy. I don’t have any answers for all of it, and some of it I am having a hard time taking it as real.”

“Hotan, what’s going on with you?” Her eyes widened as she shifted her stance. “Is, everything ok? Are you on drugs or something? Hallucinating? Delusional?”

“That’s the problem. I wish I could say yes, even maybe to some of those, but I can’t.” He looked her in the eyes as his jaw tensed. “I’m not sure what kind of situation I’m in at the moment. It’s not drugs. I promise you that.”

“What is the situation then?” He could feel her growing uneasy. “Are you involved in something really bad?”

“Well, we’ve been dating for what, like 2 years now, right?” It was confusing her, but she was doing her best to keep up. “If I was doing something, you would know about it, right?”

“Yea?” She answered cautiously. “What does that have to do with what’s wrong with you now? Is it something to do with me? Are we breaking up? Because you could have done that in a more blunt manner-”

“No. Maybe if you see this you could understand why I’m so confused. Things are so out of place and complicated.” Taking off his baggy shirt, he turned to expose his back to her. “Take a look. You know very well this was never here.”

Silently she gawked at the tattooed wings that laid across his entire back. “When did you get a tattoo? That covers your entire back! Where on earth did you get the money for something like that?”

“I didn’t. I woke up and it was just there all of a sudden.” He glanced over his shoulder to see her pale face. “I’m telling you. The things going on with me are not normal. I feel like I’m in some other realm.”

“It just appeared? But it’s huge.” She walked closer, hesitant to touch it. “Wow, looks like it’s been there for years. It just surfaced, this is wild, it looks like tribal angel wings. It’s amazing, but beautiful. When did it show up?”

“The day you guys found me in the church. It was just there, no scabs, oozing or puffiness, like you see with a tattoo. I’m stuck with it for sure.”

“Is it okay to touch?” She stared at him as he pondered on the answer.

“Go ahead.” He felt her soft warm hands glide over his back following the design gently. “There’s no difference between my skin and the mark. It’s crazy. I can’t find much information on any chemicals or conditions that could cause it. I mean silver nitrate exposure, but it’s not permanent and-”

“That’s weird.” Her voice awkward in tone as it hit his ears. “It, well, it is the same as your skin. No signs of scarring or anything, but-”

“What is it?” His stomach twisted and tightened, making him nervous. “What’s weird?”

“The marking, well, its icy cold on one wing and hot on the other.” She ran her hand over back again to ensure she wasn’t mistaken. “Yea, it’s a completely different temperature than the rest of your skin, Hotan. That’s crazy.”

“Cold and hot?” A sense of unease washed over him. Is that a sign that it holds power?

“Seriously Hotan, it’s like ice on the Left side and feverish on the right. It’s wild. No wonder you’ve been so secretive, this is crazy. Have you seen a doctor maybe? Maybe there is something going wrong with your body?”

“No, no doctors. It’s not like I have the money and with my luck I would end up as a lab rat.” He put his shirt back on. “I just have to figure out what it all means.” Talib said I was slowly becoming immortal. Maybe this is part of that…

“You have any idea why something like that would suddenly show up? Have you figured out what triggered it or you passing out? I couldn’t imagine where to begin to look for answers on something like this.” Shellie was troubled by his lack of seeing a doctor. “I would have gone to a doctor. Are you feeling ok?”

“It’s nothing a doctor can help me with. It’s a whole lot stranger, and yes, I feel fine. If I figure this whole thing out I’ll let you know more, but for now, I’ll just clue you in. You deserve that much, but I don’t want you getting involved with this whole mess. I need you focused for me, I need to know when I am with you, this can be put to the side. It’s nice not to have to think about it when you’re around.”

“I see.” She nodded, giving him a faint smile but it faded. “But at least I know sort of what’s going on in that head of yours.”

“Yea,” He handed her books back to her as he kissed her cheek, whispering, “Sorry for making you late to class.”

“No worries, it’s worth it.” She hugged him tight and he relaxed in her warmth. “You know I love you, right? Don’t be afraid to talk to me next time. I don’t care if I don’t understand one word you say to me. Just hearing you tell me your problems at least makes me feel like I can do something for the person I care most about.”

“Yea I know.” A smile crept across his face as he caught a scent of her perfume. “You better get going.”

They kissed for a moment before he watched her leave the greenhouse. Feeling relieved, it felt nice to explain something to Shellie. At least he could rest easier tonight that Shellie didn’t think he was ditching her. He made his way through the empty hallways as classes were in full stride. Paying no attention to the janitor emptying out an overfilled trashcan, he passed the classroom doors. Slowing down, he watched the faces of students in each window.

Only a few weeks ago I was no different from them, just a student with no real worries in this world. Nothing expected of me besides simply being a kid. Now I’m stripped of that comfort, forced to find out who I really am – well – who I was. I’m nothing like them. I am a recycled version of someone else, nothing more. I need to figure out this puzzle and either pick up with my forgotten life or get back to making my own. It all seems so unfair.

Going up the stairs, he passed another student who paid him no heed as he entered a door quietly. Mrs. Bothirsen shoved her glasses up giving him a displeased glare. He sat down in his seat, ignoring her burning stare.

“Page 223.” A soft whisper came through his thoughts.

“Huh?” Snapping out of his trance, he looked over at the girl in the desk next to him.

“We’re on page 223. She assigned problems 1 thru 50, only even.” She smiled sweetly at him; her pigtails covered her eyes from his view.

“Oh.” He pulled out his book and started to flip through it. “So what’s your name? I keep meaning to ask you.”

“Metsy,” She started to work on her problems. “That’s ok, nice to meet you Hotan.”

“Thank you, Metsy.” He looked over at her. “You help me all the time and I forget to tell you thank you.”

“No problem.” Focusing on the assignment in front of her, he could see her smile.

The light color of her hair must mean she was blonde. She dressed in a punk rocker style, leggings, skirt, black boots, and a logo shirt over a long sleeve shirt. Several times she had helped him out when the teacher had been condescending. Without Metsy, he wouldn’t be surviving the class. Metsy had always been nice to him no matter what the risk may have been for her.

When Ms. Bothirsen and he argued, it was obvious how uncomfortable the other students were shifting in their seats. No one understood why she had so many problems with a straight A student who was quiet in class. Intimidation was the only thing Hotan could conclude. Sighing, he worked on the assignment, zooming through the problems effortlessly. He closed his papers in the math book, setting them to the side.

Why would she help me? Metsy, I never talk to her. I never even told her thank you until today for all the times she’s came to my rescue in this class. Guess I should try to make an effort to talk to her some more. She’s struggling in the class, but I make a horrible tutor. Shellie told me never attempt to teach anyone, not even her. Maybe I can see if Shellie can help her out or something. She’s a natural at math once she catches the concept. Heh, I guess I just don’t have the patience. I hate waiting.

He took out the Book of Ancients, ready to continue the next chapter.

Chapter Ten

“Hotan!” The teacher snatched the book from his hands. “Pay Attention!”

“Give it back.” His voice was low and calm as he glared up at her. “I wasn’t doing anything wrong. I should be able to read a book in peace.”

“What?” She laughed. “You might get it back when school ends this year. If I feel you deserve it.”

Standing up from his seat, he snatched the book back. “What the hell is your problem? I’ve done nothing to you. This is a joke! How many other kids do you treat like this? Or do I intimidate you so much you have to try and pull power over me? Push me around in front of everyone to feel like you are in control.”

“Uh!” She stepped back, startled by his actions. “Why don’t you go to the office! I’m calling the principal! I don’t have to take this from you! Of all the kids! Get out of my classroom!”

“Fine!” There was no hesitation as he grabbed his book bag, the door rattling as he slammed it behind him. “This is just bullshit! I’ve done nothing to her!”

“You’re not going to pass this class!” She threatened him, hiding behind her classroom door as she screamed one last comment down the hallways. “You’re failing! You hear me Hotan! FAILING!”

“Well too bad! Long as I don’t see that face of yours again, I rather fail! I’d be more than happy to repeat this class!” Giving her the cold shoulder, he made it for the administrators’ office.

I’ve never had any issues with any teachers. They can’t take her side considering this. I wonder if Metsy or some of the other kids would speak up for me? Hard to say, she’s probably threatening them to automatic failure if they say a word about what happens in the class between us. All those ridiculous arguments over nothing. Literally finishing my work and minding my own business. What a joke…

Dropping his stuff in a chair, he flopped down in the adjacent chair. The secretary eyed him every so often as she whispered on the phone. He felt like a suspect for a murder with the way she shifted nervously while he sat staring at her. Hanging up her phone, she turned her full attention to him. Shifting in her chair again, she cleared her throat.

“Let me guess,” Her face scrunched, “Hotan?”

“Yea.” He huffed, “That’s me.”

“Who’s your counselor?” She started looking at a chart on her desk.

“Mr. Wyatt.”

“Well he’s not here today.” The phone rang and she picked it up. “Good afternoon, Northside High School, this is Lydia, how may I help you?”

“That’s too bad.” Mumbling to himself, Hotan allowed his rage pour forward. “Maybe he’ll be more useful now that he’s not here. It seems that guy gets more vacation days than work days.”

“Yes, are you sure? Ok. I’ll send him in.” Hanging up the phone, she flicked her finger at him, motioning for him to stand. “That was the principal, Mr. Piedmont. He wants you to go to his office to have a word with you.”

“Piedmont? The principal? The room at the end right?” Good. Maybe I can explain to him what’s been
going on.

“Yes, all the way down. You can’t miss it. It should say Principal on the door.” The phone rang again and she answered it, shooing him with her hand.

He walked down the narrow hallway, knocking on the Principal’s door.

This can’t get any worse. I suppose if this goes sour, I have every right to drop out. Then again, I did promise mom I would finish...

“Come in.” He heard the old man’s shaky voice thunder through the door.

“Hi.” Walking in, he stared at the old man who gazed up at him with soft blue eyes.

Colors again? Why here though? Always with the eyes. Is this some sign I should be picking up on? What am I missing?

“Take a seat there, son.” He gestured to a chair close by. His desk was cluttered with stacks of paper and he fumbled with his computer’s keyboard. “Just give me a moment. I am a tad unorganized today.”

“Thanks. I’m in no rush, Mr. Piedmont. I just hope someone in class will be nice enough, or at least brave enough, to speak up on my behalf. There is a means of making a formal complaint against Ms. Bothirsen, and I wish to follow through with one.” Hotan took in a deep breath, his words smooth and confident as he watched the old man squint at the monitor. “Once you have a moment, I wish to tell you what’s been going on in class.”

“Well now.” The old man’s face stretched awkwardly as he grinned, shifting his eyes to Hotan. “Before we start such a nasty conversation, I would like your opinion on something. What do you think about that painting over there on the wall? I just bought it this week, and I am not so sure about it.”

“Huh?” Slowly shifting in his chair, Hotan looked back at this painting he was referring to.

Ok, he completely ignored what I was saying. Why does he want me to look at his picture? Wait, this has got to be some kind of joke. How much more frustrating is today going to be?

Once again, colors came to life to his eyes and mind. He saw the painting in full color, but nothing else in the room. It was a nice sized watercolor picture in a Japanese Ink style scroll. Smooth strokes showed the caliber of the artist’s talent. He examined the earthy greens and golds on the bamboo limbs where a colorful bird sat. The bird held many colors that blended beautifully with reds, browns, purples, and blues. He turned back to the old man who smiled proudly about his painting.

I don’t understand what the message is here. I don’t know what is so important about an old man and his prized painting. Huffing, he took a moment to shake the anxiety that rattled his nerves. I don’t think I can take much more of this today.

“Well, what do you think?” Mr. Piedmont’s eyes made a strong connection with his, the blue flashing in excitement. “Isn’t it beautiful?”

“It’s nice.” Mumbling, Hotan swallowed his unhinged feelings. Where is this all going? Does he want something? Does he have something I need? Will I get an answer or only more questions like before?

“Ah. Which color is your favorite?”

“Color?” Shellie’s green eyes flashed in his head, a color much like on the bamboo and bird in the painting. “The green, I really like the soft earthy green on the golden bamboo.”

“Really?” Opening a desk drawer, Mr. Piedmont put some wrapped candy on the desk. “Try the green ones, they’re good. I always had a sweet tooth and I find these make for a great ice breaker.”

“The, green ones.” Staring at the candy, Hotan could only see variations of gray. Kyle talks about the red candies all the time. He is always getting in trouble and all I ever hear from him is about the candy. Is this a trick? “Right the green ones, of course.”

“Well, where were we?” Mr. Piedmont watched as he picked up a piece and started to eat one. “What’s this whole problem in Math class? You have such a clean record and your grades are off the charts. I couldn’t imagine you making a scene and acting rebellious in class so close to graduation.”

“Oh, she doesn’t like me. I try to mind my own business, but she literally picks on me constantly. I finish my work and then sit quietly, but she will start an argument every time. Nagging at me, threatens that I’m failing. When I left, she continued to yell at me in front of the class, always in front of other students. I’ve gotten straight A’s on her exams; there is no reason for me to fail this class.” Gnawing at the hard candy, he was trying to place a flavor, maybe watermelon. Why watermelon, that doesn’t help.

“Hmm, I’ll see if I can work out something. You’ve got an excellent record, my boy. Obviously it must be her.” He lay back in his seat looking at his computer, clicking here and there. “Squeaky clean in fact, just bad chemistry between you two. That’s ok. It happens more than you think.”

“You actually agree with me?” Oh, thank God.

“Of course, only thing I can really think of doing is giving you some sort of extra curriculum in that time slot. I’ll talk to her and just let you take her exams. I know you know the material, your past teachers have written detailed comments on your abilities. This way, you just need to pass her exams.” Mr. Piedmont lifted an eyebrow at him. “How’s that sound? Will that work for you? Never have to see her again.”

“Fair enough to me. What are you going to make me do instead? Where should I start going? I can always head home early. I’m ok with that.”

“I don’t know. I’ll see to it tomorrow. Just come straight here instead of her class.” He smiled again. “No going home early, I am held liable for you until school lets out. I can’t have that, now can I?”

“I completely understand. Thanks a lot, Mr. Piedmont.” Relaxing, Hotan smiled back. “I’ve heard a lot of good things about you. It’s nice to see they were true.”

“Anything for one of my top students! How are your parents doing?” The old man took a deep breath. “I am sure they are proud of such an outstanding scholar!”

“Well, never knew my Dad. Don’t even know if he’s alive. My Mom died 2 years ago so I’ve been on my own for quite some time, sir.” Hotan took another piece of candy. I hate this. I hate talking about my mom and my deadbeat dad. You would think they put this stuff in the records too. They need to and should label it ‘Do not ask’.

“Oh, sorry to hear that, but you’re doing well I hope?” The smile faded as he observed Hotan’s solemn face. A few more clicks of his mouse and it seemed he found what he was looking for. “It says here your guardian is an Annie Kerbowski?”

“Yeah, the girl who babysat me when I was little. She lets me live in a small apartment at our complex, which she owns. My mom and her were fairly close and having no other family she stepped up to the plate. In return, I’m the handy man. She really has no one else either.” Sighing, he rubbed the back of his neck, letting Mr. Piedmont know the inner workings of his hard life. “And I tend to keep myself busy with things, no point in getting upset over it. I don’t like to dwell on the past. When it happens, that’s it. Nothing can ever be undone. You move forward and hope you learned something from it.”

“True, and very wise of you to say. You’re not like your fellow students and it’s not your intelligence. You’re particularly more mature for someone your age, but hard times do that to you. You simply grow from them. I am sorry you had to grow up so fast.” The old man mustered a sincere smile.

“Interesting way of putting it, I like being more grown up. It’s a lot more work, but I enjoy being independent and alone. I don’t make many friends at school because of it.”

“Well.” He glanced at his computer some more. “I better let you go. School’s about to end in 5 minutes and I have announcements to do. You can always talk to me if you need to. Take another candy if you like. I have more than enough.”

“Today was exciting enough for me.” He stood up along with Mr. Piedmont who shook his hand. “Once more, thank you Mr. Piedmont. Thank you for being on my side on this.”

“A true sign that you’ve learned something and have received more wisdom than before.” Walking around his desk, the short old man opened his door. “See you tomorrow, Hotan. I’ll put your time to good use. I promise you that much.”

Hotan made his way to his locker as he heard Mr. Piedmont’s voice thunder across the school’s intercom system. The math book was in his locker and never will it be touched again. Flinging his book bag over his shoulder, heavy from the Book of Ancients, he swiftly walked to the exit. The classrooms opened their doors and students flooded the hall in a ruckus of noise, gossip, and shouting. Down the front steps of the school, he headed to his left where the old oak stood tall. He leaned against it waiting for Shellie to show. The horde of students piled onto busses and chattering circles gathered on the front schoolyard.

They were all red.

“What?” He saw no one close to where he stood. Where did that voice come from?

They were red candies. It was a test. You should be more cautious about being able to see signs in random color. If Geliah-

Who are you? Hotan growled, thinking to himself angrily. Who’s in my head! Answer me now!

Now that Geliah has left, I can speak freely. I’m Callan, the element of Water. I need help. I think you’re the only one who can get me out of here and break his hold on me. There was a moment of silence before he continued, If anyone can disrupt his powers, it would be Rebirth. Hotan, you are going to need to get your abilities under control. I can see what you see, and this shouldn’t be that strong of a connection.

How are you able to talk to me like this? I don’t understand why me? Why not Talib or someone else? I’m just a kid. Shouting his thoughts out was the only thing he could think to do. I can’t help you, Callan. I don’t even know who I am. I have no abilities!

Your element flows through you. It’s there, you just need to find the rhythm. Through this flow, we can communicate using our elements and their connections to the world. You’ll understand later. There was a moment of panic as his voice sped up. For now, I need to request your assistance. Geliah will not let me leave by my own free will. Damn, my time’s been cut short.

“This is going to get difficult.” Head spinning, he took in a deep breath, trying to get his nerves to lie back down.

The connection between him and Callan had ceased and his mind spun in circles on what he could do. Mulling the conversation over in his head, one element stood out, “They were all red!”

“What was?” Kyle froze as he approached. “What was red?”

“The candy,” He stared at Kyle wide eyed. “They were red, how stupid of me.”

“What candy?” Kyle’s face scrunched up a moment, confused by Hotan’s panic.

“The candy in Mr. Piedmont’s office.”

“Oh! I love those watermelon things. Hey! Wait, why were you in the principal’s office?” Excitement crossed Kyle. “Finally! Someone else was sent to Mr. Piedmont’s office! You’re never in trouble, that’s my job! I go just for the candy.”

“Long story, but.” He paused a moment. “I hope things will make sense tomorrow. I’ll have to tell you about it later. There’s too much hitting me all at once. Today has been a pain in my neck.”

“I hope so too, because I’m so confused. But, did you hear about the tryouts for the Big Band?” Kyle could tell he was in need of a break from the chaos. “Are we cancelling or are we doing this thing?”

“Yea, I was going to take Shellie with me and sign us up.” Trying to forget everything, he glowered at a group of laughing jocks. “But the problem is we don’t have a bass guitarist. We’re short one person since Shellie isn’t old enough.”

“Man that sucks. Got anyone in mind?” Leaning against the tree next to Hotan, Kyle kicked at the dirt. “I can’t think of anyone I know.”

“Nope, I haven’t a clue either. I was going to see if Chaz would let us do auditions for a day at the club. We can run an Ad in the newspaper and put up flyers. Set a date for those who may want to try out for the spot.” He watched as Shellie walk out chatting happily to her friends. “Let’s see if she’s up for it huh?”

“That would be cool.” Kyle nodded to himself. “We could be the judges, Shellie might want to help judge since they’ll be replacing her. Seems the right thing to do, she’ll have to work with them.”

“That’s what I was thinking. Hey, Kyle?” Hotan shifted his eyes to Kyle whose smile faded. “Can I ask you something in regards to our secret?”

“Yea, what is it?” He furrowed his brow.

“That tattoo of yours. Does it have any interesting qualities about it?” He lifted an eyebrow at Kyle. “Change in texture, temperature, or anything out of the normal?”

“Temperature?” Pulling at his shirt, Kyle started to fidget.

“Well, for instance, my marking is ice cold in one section and hotter in the other part. There’s something unnatural about how it feels.”

“Heh,” Staring at the ground he shyly kicked up some leaves. “Something like that, I suppose. I ran into that problem today. It’s definitely not the right, temperature. I wish I had paid closer attention to it.”

“Problem?” Pulling himself away from the tree, Hotan waited for Kyle.

“Well, if we walk down to the church, I’ll show you. It’s bad enough it happened in class. I just don’t want to try my luck while we are still around people.” He shot him a desperate look. “It was an accident, I swear.”

“Ok.” Staring into his eyes, he could see Kyle was nervous. What happened to him today? I know I was having a bad day, but I keep forgetting I’m not alone in this self-discovery of promised powers and immortality nonsense.

“Hey!” Shellie ran up smiling. “Glad to see you made it through the rest of the day!”

“Hey, Shel.” Hotan stepped away from the tree.

“I’m so sorry.” She hugged him tightly.

“Sorry?” Her hug got tighter. “I’m the one who should be saying sorry here lately. I haven’t been talking to you let alone telling you about anything going on with me.”

“I was getting so angry over nothing. I wasn’t helping your problems. For that much I am sorry.” She released him, looking up at him starry eyed. “Just please keep me in the loop. You never know if there’s something I can help you with.”

“Don’t worry about it.” A smile crept across Hotan’s face. “So you going to go to the radio studio with me or do you have other plans?”

“Hmm, I don’t know.” She glanced back at her girlfriends who giggled and blushed when Hotan looked over them. “I need to study…”

“Oh come on.” Kyle winked at her. “We can take my car. It’ll be an adventure!”

“All right! But I’ll call you. I need to go home and clean up before Mom gets home. Chores first, then I should be free to run the town with you guys. Is that ok?”

“That’s fine. Guess I’ll let you catch a ride with Jen then.” Hotan motioned to a girl who was waiting back on the sidewalk for her. “Looks like she needs you.”

“See you Hotan.” She kissed his cheek and left.

“To the church?” He looked at Kyle.

“Yeah, definitely”

They walked across the grass as the yellow busses pulled off, one after the other. Walking down the sidewalk, they remained in complete silence, lost in thought. A car drove by with some friends and mechanically they waved in response. It was still strange to walk into the building, shining and clean. Hotan stared at the towering crucifix once again. Walking to the front of the pews, he stood in front of the statue that seemed to smile down at him. It was like something magnificent had happened and a sense of pride was being shown.

So strange for such an inanimate object to express so many feelings.

He turned his attention to Kyle who finally took off his backpack. Hotan’s blood iced as he witnessed the scorched shirt. Kyle’s marking had literally burnt through his shirt, leaving charred holes exposing the Phoenix-like image that stretched its wings across his back.

Chapter Eleven

“You’ve got to be kidding.” Hotan stood in disbelief, gawking at the charred shirt.

“No joke, man. I was sitting in Chemistry class when it happened. I was leaning back in my chair sleeping like always, when I smelled something burning. Thought for a minute or two that it was like a Bunsen burner or something like that. Then I realized everyone was doing bookwork.” Kyle sat down, slouching over his knees. “It didn’t just burn through my shirt, dude. It melted the freaking plastic chair! It left an imprint of the marking, until I smudged it. Mr. Mayer chewed me out. He thought I took a lighter to the chair again. So, now I have in-school suspension for the next three days.”

“Maybe it’s because of your element, fire.” Hotan rubbed the back of his neck as he mulled it over. “There must be a connection to what you were doing.”

“I was dreaming about driving this high-powered car when it happened. You should have seen it! It was dark green with nitro and the works!” Kyle perked up as he described the car of his dreams. “I was like the fuel going through the pistons.”

“Firing of pistons, eh?” Hotan grinned as he looked over at the angelic statue that Geliah had sliced in half. “Power of fire. A moment of envious want, an emotional spike for you. I wonder…”

“What?” Kyle looked at the statue. “What did you mumble? Did you figure something out?”

“Envy! That’s how you can trigger it. Just think about your precious high-powered engine and how badly you want it! You can use those powers Talib was talking about. In the Book of Ancients, the element of Earth was because she wanted something, she envied that she couldn’t grow anything.” Hotan was excited, for the first time this chaos was making sense. “You envy the power in an engine more than anything else. Kyle if the dream is what set it off, why not think and focus on that! See if you can’t get your power to work? It makes perfect sense.”

Kyle looked at him puzzled. “You mean that’s it? It’s that simple?”

“Yea, for you it’s simple. Give it a try.”

“What should I try doing?” Kyle jumped up. “I can’t light a pew on fire.”

“Try something simple, like,” He looked about and noticed the candles on the floor around the crucifix. “Try lighting those candles.”

Kyle knelt by one, pausing for a moment. “How am I supposed to do this?”

“Recall the engine and kind of lock that image in your head. Remember how you felt and what you may have been thinking about how badly you wanted an engine like that. Don’t break from that emotional spike at all. Focus the energy from it to the candles. It sort of works like an electrical system. That moment is the power source and you’re the lightning rod.”

“Ok, engine in mind.” Kyle held his palm out and sat there for a few minutes. “Hotan, it’s not working. Nothing is coming out, my hands are cold. Any suggestions?”

“Hold a finger on a wick. Play through the dream in your head.”

“How’s that going to work? Won’t it put it out?” Kyle stared at the little white wick on the candle. “Won’t I get burned?”

“Just do it. Trust me on this ok? I think you’re fireproof after setting your own shirt and chair on fire.” Sighing, he watched Kyle put a finger on the wick and nothing happened. “You’re not focusing enough. You need to think only about the pivotal moment when you smelt burning plastic. Come on, try a little harder.”

Kyle relaxed, recalling the climax of his dream. He opened one eye to check to see if anything had resulted in this ultimate focus. “Oh snap!”

“Told you!” A flame was dancing on the candle, where Kyle’s finger still laid. Clearly, the heat of fire wouldn’t burn him, but accept him as the same. “That’s the kind of focus you’re going to need for this.”

“Dude! Let me do that again!” Kyle repeated the process until he had lit all twenty candles. “Check it! I lit them all with my fingers! Forget playing with a lighter. I am the fire! This rocks!”

“Yea,” Hotan stared at the line of flames that all shifted and flickered in unison. “At least I was able to help you. Just wish I could help myself.”

“But, how did you know?” Kyle stood up from his low crouch, facing him with a skeptical look on his face.

“Know about what?” Hotan broke his daze from the candles’ flames.

“How I can use my power and trigger it. What I needed to do in order for the thing to turn on.” Kyle glanced at him suspiciously. “What else are you hiding? What are you not telling me?”

“It seemed logical. After everything Talib’s told me, the book, and that weird dream a while ago, it seems I should have it down by now.” He took a slow steady breath. “I just can’t seem to figure out what my focus should be. I don’t even feel the power in me, and I can’t stop feeling that I should be feeling something there. I’m sure you started feeling something? Am I right? There’s this void in your soul that’s now filled? That’s how I imagine it would be like…”

I’ve been thinking about it for so long…

“Well, not at first. Today I could feel it when I woke up. Why haven’t you been using your powers and doing crazy stuff? You definitely were the one that fixed this church with your powers, right?” Kyle sat down on the steps in front of the pews. His full attention aimed for Hotan. “It’s just hard to believe you can’t use your powers when you can teach someone else. I know I’m not the brightest crayon in the box, but come on.”

“Because I haven’t figured out what it is that I truly envy. In order for the powers to work, I need to focus on what I desire or resent the most, but I don’t know what that is. That’s where it comes from, the emotional spike. For you, it’s your envy for that powerful engine with the flames roaring through it. That envy can be anything, but only one thing will work and it varies from person to person. I don’t quite understand why power would come from desire like that, but maybe sometime later it might fall in place for me. Hopefully.” He looked back up at the statue that seemed to have lost its smile. “I just wish I knew myself better. I don’t know who I am anymore. Everyone wants me to be this other Hotan, but that’s impossible. Nor do I want to be that person, and looking back before all this started, I didn’t exactly aim to be a person. It was more along the lines of what I am supposed to do.”

“Yea, I guess it does make things harder when there’s pressure to become someone you’re not.” Kyle started to observe the art carved in the lumber supports above them. Epic battle scenes were etched into them, a visual of the struggle between angels and demons. “Life is a struggle against the good and bad we experience. A never-ending battle.”

“Anyway, are you going to the radio station with Shellie and me? If so we’ll take your car.” Hotan was tired of thinking about things.

All this confirms is that my thoughts on the mechanics of how it could work are correct. I just need to find my focus. I wonder when Kyle got so philosophical?

“Yea, I’m going.” Rubbing the back of his neck, Kyle took a moment to blow out the candles. “Better not leave these unattended, I suppose.”

“Good. We could grab something to eat on our way back, I guess.” The cell phone in his right pocket started vibrating.

“Is that Shellie?” Kyle watched as Hotan pushed ignore.

“No. It’s actually Annie. I’ll call you when I’m ready. You need to change shirts anyhow.” He smirked for a moment. “And take a shower, you smell like burnt plastic.”

“Yea.” Kyle mustered a smile and chuckle. “Hey, Hotan, who owns this place anyhow? Someone owns it right?”

“No clue. But I hope they like the free restoration.” They were outside now, and Hotan sat on his motorcycle snapping on his helmet. “If they even know it’s been fixed. Then again, something tells me Talib might own this place.”

“Well, I’m starting to see why you like to come here so much. It makes me feel safe.” Hotan gave him a shrug and driving away without another word.

Kyle watched the bike take its usual route home, disappearing around the block. Looking at his black and blue sports watch, he rubbed the back of his neck. Shuddering didn’t help cut the coldness he felt after using his power for the first time. “This is going to be hard to regain my power again. So much has changed…”

Hotan pulled up to the small apartment building. Kicking the kickstand down, he pulled off his helmet, sweat dripping down his cheek. It was hot outside with no breeze, just clear blue skies. The ride was soothing, but miserable when driving on the main highway. Heat rose off the asphalt in torturous swells. It seemed to scorch his legs and arms as it flowed up and stung against his face. His helmet was agonizing with its thick padding. He dreaded every moment he had to stop at a red light or stop sign.

Sighing, he looked forward to hitting the air conditioning inside the apartment building. As he entered the building, he paused under a main air vent that was washing cool air over him. Annie was yawning as she sat on a ladder, waiting to gain his full attention. She was wearing black and grey hints of a color board shorts and a cute white tank top. Her hair messily hung off the back of her head in a bun held with two black chopsticks. Smiling when she noticed him look her way, Annie stood to greet him with a hug.

“Hey! Glad you could come so quickly.” Scratching her head, she looked up at the light on the ceiling. “That lighting tube went out and I need you to replace it. I’ve had a few complaints about it all ready. You know how some of the tenants are around here.” She deepened her voice and added, “I take pride in where I live and hate to see it turn into a dump!”

Hotan smiled as he knew which resident she had imitated, “We still have lights in the basement? It’s been a while since I last replaced one of these things.”

“There should be a couple left. Basement’s a mess, I had to shove some old boxes down there a while back.” She smiled, patting him on the back as they walked down the hallway. “By the way, Jake and I want you to join us for dinner tonight. He has a free night and wants to do something with you. I told him dinner at my place was always a good way to go.”

“Dinner? I do love your cooking, so I can’t argue with that. Jake has a free night again? I have a lot of questions for him, and lot of catching up to do.”

Finally, a chance to meet Jake! I want to see what kind of answers I can get from him, instead of Talib, on this whole mess.

“Well, we were talking. Both of us thought it’d be a nice idea to get together and discuss how you are doing. Jake plans to bring a friend over and I thought, well, we thought, you’d like the chance to get to know your sponsor. Jake wants to be there for you, since he knows what it’s like to be the only one left in your family. You have a lot in common, to be honest.” She unlocked a door with her clump of keys and turned the light that struggled to pour down the stairs that led to a dusky basement. “He feels so horrible about not having enough time to talk to you about things.”

“I’ll be there. What time?” Rubbing the back of his neck, he looked into the grimy darkness they called the basement. I hate going down there…

“Seven thirtyish. Thanks again, Hotan.” Patting his shoulder, she made one more comment as she left, “It’s a blessing having your help to keep this place in shape.”

“No problem.” Huffing, he started his descent down the stairs.

The wood would crackle and moan under the weight of his footsteps. Chills raced up his spine like roaches with each mournful cry as if teasing him that they would drop him into the endless abyss below. The room was dark and musky as he turned on the hanging light bulb. He looked about the room full of dust-covered boxes, reading the labels as he scanned the room with his eyes. Some had toilet paper, others had chemicals such as bleach, but the majority of them were unreadable or not labeled at all. Starting to his right, he worked his way around. Moving boxes around the crowded room, he was trying to figure out where the light bulbs had been nonchalantly forgotten.

He flinched as something scurried pass his feet, quickly turning to watch the small, fast moving object zoom between two boxes. Shrouded in the dim light and darkness of the cold room he couldn’t make out what exactly it was. He shrugged to himself knowing it was most likely a mouse or rat. They were common in this old building’s basement along with any other old building in the world. He turned back and continued digging through the boxes finding paper towels and the regular light bulbs, yet no signs of the long fluorescent he needed.

Opening an old unlabeled box, he found some old Christmas ornaments, which seemed a tad personal to stores there, since it had been the maintenance supply closet for decades now.

Did Annie put these here? But I’ve never seen her use any of it. Maybe it was left behind by a resident? I wonder…

He started to dig through it until he cut his hand on a broken glass. He snatched his hand out of the box promptly and walked over to the light to give it a closer look. It felt worse than it looked. It stung badly as he pulled a broken shard from the small gash and a stream of warm dark colored blood dripped off his hand. Grunting in annoyance, he sighed pressing his left thumb firmly on it to stop the bleeding. He closed his eyes to try to focus. He had been feeling irritable all day. He turned back to the boxes to finish the job at hand.

I don’t have much time to spare today, too much I need to get done.

Closing the Christmas box, he started to search somewhere else. Moving the labeled boxes behind him, he came to some that were even more questionable.

I know these boxes have been here, but I never noticed them so, open and having so much personal items in them. Why are they all off the shel-!

His heart jolted when he heard a box behind him fall off a shelf. The violent bang and clutter of it hitting the cement floor made every muscle in his body tighten. He turned back to see nothing. Cautiously he walked over, mumbling to himself. “I’m going to bring traps down with me next time, Rat. You’ve knocked one box too many off the shelves.”

Out of curiosity, he opened the box and looked at the contents. Pulling out old books and photo albums, he shrugged to himself.

Well this is weird. Why would there be photo albums and things like this down here? I’ll take it with me, dig through it and see if there’s anything worth keeping or maybe see if I can figure out who owns them.

He started to search the shelf again, finding the tube lights near where the box had once rested.

Finally! I can get out of this basement! I hate how dark it gets down here.

Heading back up the steps with the boxes, he turned the light off as he reached the top. He looked down the dark eerie stairway as if he was saying goodbye. Pushing the door closed, he could hear something. Right before it completely shut, he thought he heard a voice. It seemed as if someone, or even a child, had giggled or whispered something as the door shut.

What was hiding in the dark cold basement of the building, or am I freaking myself out?

He shook his head in dismay, thinking he was starting to really loose it now. Feeling paranoid, all he could think is that it needed to stop before it caused him to go mad. He sighed again, making his way back to the ladder in the hallway. Pulling a tube light out, he climbed the ladder and slid the cover to the side. Unsnapping the burnt out light, he quickly replaced it with the new one.

“Mmm! Aren’t you sexy!” He froze as a girlish voice broke his whirlpool of thoughts. “All hot and sweaty. Standing up there on that ladder like a statue of hotness.”

“Hey, Kasie,” The shorthaired girl, who lived on the first floor, was well known to all in the building for her flirtatious ambience. “What do you want? Need something fixed?”

“You! What else would I want, boy!” She tilted her head with attitude, her body language always more exaggerated than the average person. “Are you single yet? Have you dumped that hoe of yours? Because you know I’m sexier than her. She can go to hell.”

“Unfortunately I haven’t dumped my girlfriend.” Sliding the cover back in place, he slowly climbed back down off the ladder. “Because I like her, and for some reason she still likes me. So sorry, I’m still unavailable, Kasie.”

“Oh. Is that so?” She pranced off, seeing that she was getting none of the attention she had wanted from him. “Whatever! I’m too good for you anyways!”

Closing the ladder up, carrying it down the hall, he put it in its corner of the laundry room. He pulled his cell phone out a moment and glanced over it.

Still no word from Shellie or Kyle.

Feeling clammy from the basement still, he picked up the box of books and headed up the stairs. Taking his time unlocking his door, he took advantage of being able to catch his breath for a moment. His thoughts were struggling between school, the band, and this puzzle involving immortality as he downed a glass of water.

Pulling out the first dusty book his hand grabbed, he wiped off layers of dust. It was a worn-out photo album that looked extremely antique-like. It sparked his interest as he stared at the battered black cover, showing its age. It revealed nothing about what he may find inside; clearly, it had been untouched for a very long time. His cell phone started vibrating and playing TOOL’s Parabola. Throwing the book back in its box, he answered it.

“Kyle just picked me up, we’re headed your way!” Her cheerful tone brought a smile to his lips. “Did you finish up with that work order for Anne?”

“Yea, it was just a light bulb thing. I’ll be out front waiting on you guys.” After short goodbyes, he hung up.

Throwing his shirt to the ground with the rest of his dirty clothes, he decided a change of clothes was in order. He pulled a nicer black shirt out of his closet, one of the few actually hanging, and put it on. As he buttoned it up, he looked up at the TOOL poster that was slightly lit up like a night light from the sun it blocked. He cracked a slight grin as he thought about how much it was like him.

That’s a good way of seeing this whole thing. I’m the obstacle in the way, and in my own way at that. I’m on the verge of seeing it all, but I can’t step out of the way so the information can move freely. Where’s Talib anyhow? I really was hoping he would get back to me sooner than this. Not even one letter lately. They stopped as soon as they started and I can’t seem to bring myself to write a letter to hand to Jake without knowing exactly who he is. What could be so important to abandon me? Leave me to the wind like this when I am clearly the element that caused this mess. What else is happening that I am not aware of? I get the feeling it would still fall back on my shoulders and the knots in my stomach say it has to do with mistakes made by the original Hotan.

He locked his apartment door behind him and headed down the stairs in silence thinking deeply about things. Walking out into the bright warm sunlight, he sat down on the front steps of the old brick apartment building, watching the neighborhood road. Waiting for his ride to arrive, he stared at the doves sitting on a nearby fence cooing softly. They would move every so often on their perches, ruffling their feathers. A car drove pass and they all fled to the other side of the fence, except one. He gave it more attention as he observed the soft brown color of its feathers as it twitched its head, as if staring back at him with the same sense of curiosity. Only difference it had from the rest of its comrades was the dark black marking on the feathers on its neck, making it look like a collar. Another car drove pass and it flew off into the blinding brightness of the sun, instead of the path that the other doves had taken.

Sighing, he now gazed at his bike, admiring the gleam of the light off the curves. He recalled a time where he worried more about it than himself, but now, there were more concerning things to think about.

What scares me the most is I still don’t know if I’m going crazy? Maybe I am stuck in my own reality and I just need to wake up. How do I explain everything? Kyle was able to use his power. There was no explanation for it. It’s so intangible sounding but there it is screaming in my face. It’s real. It wants me to know it’s real. What kind of power sleeps inside me? They must have some way of knowing I have it. Why can’t I use it? What kind of aftermath does it cause when I use it? All the elements are connected. That’s what Callan said. Nothing is ever going to be the same. This always happens to me. Why can’t I be left alone by fate’s changing tides? I feel so naïve in this situation. Everything has a purpose or meaning; how I am supposed to interpret it all into one cohesive answer? I can’t do this for much longer. Groping blindly through this is getting me nowhere.

Kyle’s car pulled up and slowed to a stop. Shellie was in the back and smiled happily as he shut the door and the vehicle began to move. They all sat in silence, each of them thinking of the situation at hand yet unsure how to start a conversation like normal. Sighing, Hotan couldn’t mistake the fact the tension in the car was due to them all stuck on the supernatural chaos that has invaded their lives.

Too many questions, not enough answers.

Kyle broke the silence, his voice was deep as he started, “Should we tell Shellie? Tell her something about what’s going on?”

Hotan shot a look at him then looked into the back of the car at Shellie. “I kind of told her about it, clued her in at least.” Wonder what she said on the drive over.

“Oh?” Kyle gave her a glance through the rear view mirror. “Ok, that makes things less awkward.”

“Yea, I know about it.” Sighing, she looked down at her fiddling fingers. “It’s definitely really weird. That tattoo is massive and the idea of it just appearing overnight is unnerving.”

“Did you tell her about me?” A red light caught them and Kyle slowed to a stop. “Or just about you?”

“No, I didn’t mention you.” Hotan returned his gaze out the window watching the people walk up and down the sidewalks, chatting happily to one another. “I didn’t want to say more than what was needed.”

It took a lot of pressure to get me to tell her what little I did. Now Kyle just wants to throw in the crazier side. I didn’t want to get her that involved. I can barely believe it myself, even if Kyle can somewhat use his element of fire. This is more surreal, where Talib makes me think I should be feeling nostalgic. I don’t think I can handle her looking at me with those eyes I love so much as if I were crazy and a million miles away from reality.

“What about you?” Shellie leaned in between them as the light turned green again. Hotan received her fiery glare for a moment as she spoke, “What do you mean tell me about you, Kyle?”

“I’m basically in the same situation.” Kyle sighed as he switched into the left lane. “I have the same thing.”

“You have the marks, the tattoo-like marks on your back, too.” She pleaded for more information from Kyle.

“Yea,” Kyle glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes. “I have that too.”

“Strange, but does it have a different temperature from the rest of your skin, like Hotan’s?” She leaned back in her seat, but Hotan dodged looking her in the eyes and went back to gazing out his window. “His doesn’t feel, natural.”

“That would be putting it mildly.” Kyle answered angrily. “I melted a chair today, got in-school suspension over it.”

Hotan cracked a smile, but it faded again.

“What?” Shellie gapped. “Melted? A chair?”

“Yep,” Kyle huffed, “And I don’t need a lighter anymore to light my candles. Never again!”

“How come you have it though? You two are best friends, so.” Shellie paused a minute and twisted her face. “You didn’t join some satanic cult or something did you guys? Is this thing contagious?”

“No.” They replied hastily. She finds it just as hard to believe as I do.

“Just woke up with it, just like me” Hotan looked back at her, calm and stern. Please don’t think I’m crazy, Shel. “But there’s still a whole lot I don’t know. That’s why I didn’t say much else.”

“Well.” She sighed giving a soft smile, but it was weak. “Just keep me informed ok.”

Kyle took a left turn into a parking lot and found a decent place to park. “We’re here!”

Chapter Twelve

They walked up to the large gray business building and pushed through the glass doors, entering in silence. Each of them were far from focusing on their purpose for being there. Questions rolled in their heads of the turmoil the unexplainable had stirred. Head and hearts argued on how far one could push the boundaries of the line they once knew as reality. Hotan led them down the hallway to the right where some elevators were waiting.

He had been there a couple of times but always felt a need to double check. A chart hung on the wall that revealed what floor the radio station would be located on. They patiently waited for the elevator to make its way down from the top floor and got on. The fourth floor button lit up in response to Hotan’s finger press and he leaned against the wall, watching the doors slide close. It gave a slight moan as it first started, but met its destination in silence, smoothly slowing to a stop. Walking out into a small lobby, a secretary was stapling pamphlets. They waited patiently for her to gain a free moment.

“May I help you?” She nudged her glasses up on her nose.

“Yes, we’re here about the Big Band tryouts?” Hotan watched as she straightened herself. “How do we sign up for that? Do we need to see someone in particular?”

“Oh. Umm, hold on and let me see if Becca’s busy.” She walked through a door and disappeared for a few minutes. The door opened once more and she motioned them in, “She’s waiting for you, third door on the left.”

Hotan mumbled a thank you as they all wondered down the hall to the door in question.

This is the one thing in my life I have to look forward to, something that I want for myself. Not for mom, not because I’m supposed to do it, not because someone asked me to do it, or pressured me into this; I’m doing it for me.

“Hiya!” The short haired girl greeted them warmly, her glasses propped on top of her head. “I’m Becca and I am in charge of the Big Band signups!”

“Hi.” Hotan lifted an eyebrow as he observed her small tidy office full with jars of candies. “We’re the local band that plays over at 7even’s, Closet Hobos. I’m Hotan, lead singer, and this is my drummer, Kyle, and bassist, Shellie. We wanted to enroll for the Big Band competition you’ve been announcing on your station.”

“So you want to enter for the Big Band huh?” Becca flopped her glasses back to her nose as she sorted throw a drawer that had already been open. “So glad to see you here! I’ve seen you guys play over at Chaz’s club, and your one of the best cover bands around.”

Hotan grinned hearing the praise. “What do we need to do?”

“Just fill out this application and just drop it back off along with CD that has at least three songs. They should be songs your group will be planning to perform.” She handed Hotan a three-page packet. “In short, you should bring back or mail this packet along with a disc in two weeks.”

He scanned the papers over, making sure he got any questions out of the way before walking away. “Why three songs?”

“If you make it through the initial judging and get into the actual concert part of the competition, you will need a minimum of three songs. Two for competing and the last one in case you make it to the final showdown, normally two or three bands are left at that point. Be sure to state where you found your resources such as sheet music and lyrics.” She leaned back in her chair. “Any more questions?”

“Nope, I think that takes care of everything.” Shaking hands with Becca, they made their way back out of the building. Finally, something I can focus on that I have some sort of control over.

“I can record it for you guys.” Shellie commented, “It’s the least I can do since I won’t be making the age requirement.”

Kyle gleamed happily as they waved bye to the secretary as they headed into the elevator. “Where are we going to record it at?”

“I figured we could do it at Chaz’s club. If we show up before opening, we can easily record three songs with no problems.” Taking the papers from Hotan, she began to flip through them as well. “And since I have the best handwriting, I’ll fill this all out.”

“My handwriting isn’t that bad.” Hotan furrowed his brow as he looked at her coy smile. “It’s very legible compared to Kyle’s, if you consider what he does writing. At least, I don’t think it’s in the English language.”

“Hey!” Huffing, Kyle punched Hotan’s shoulder as they started laughing. “At least I try!”

“Hotan, don’t be so mean.” Shellie hugged his arm, joining in their laughter, happy to see the tension in Hotan’s muscles break.

“I still can’t figure out how the teacher’s read anything he turns in.” He winked at her, “Nothing mean about it, just being an honest friend that’s all.”

“No worries, I’m used to it by now.” A grin stretched across Kyle’s face and a sparkle came to his eyes. “But, I did get a step ahead of him! First time that I, Kyle, am more superior than the all-knowing Hotan!”

“A step ahead, how?” Hotan looked over at him with great amusement, pushing the exit door open for Shellie. “I don’t recall any time where you’re one step ahead. Did I miss something?”

“At least I can use my power.” Kyle bragged as he unlocked his car.

Hotan struggled to swallow down the knot that lumped itself in his throat.

No, Kyle! Don’t say anything else!

“Power?” She had felt the tension return to his arm tenfold, his muscles as hard as a rock. “What power? What on earth are you talking about?”

“It’s nothing.” Hotan was abrupt in his response as they got into the car and Kyle started the engine, flipping the AC on full blast.

I can’t think of anything to say!

His mind was failing him, how could he possibly cover something so absurd?

If I would stop panicking I could crack a joke, or laugh it off. What’s wrong with me, has it really gotten under my skin this badly?

Kyle paused deep in thought as he stared at Hotan. The motor purred in the background, it was physically visible that his distraught feelings were wrecking Hotan’s thoughts. “Guess I’ll shut up now. You have a point, I never can be a step ahead of you, Hotan.”

“Ye-yeah,” The car backed out of the parking lot as Hotan’s thoughts crawled their way out of the flurry of concerns.

I need to get a grasp on myself. I can’t shut down like this…

“Hotan, you’re such a jackass.” Kyle mumbled as he pulled onto the road. “Always so smart and carefree about it too.”

“I know.” Hotan smirked looking out his window, relieved that Kyle managed to redirect the conversation.

Since when did Kyle start being so clever?

“So, is someone going to explain what you are talking about?” Shellie leaned in between them. “You made no sense. What powers?”

“Nothing.” Hotan and Kyle mumbled in unison as they avoided eye contact with her.

Kyle’s voice was filled with regret and almost inaudible. “Forget about it.”

Shellie huffed, frustrated with all the secrets being held away from her. “So where are we going?”

“Jessica’s restaurant.” The car paused at a stop sign as Kyle spoke. “I’m starving!”

“Haven’t talked to her in a while anyhow.” Pouting, Shellie flopped back in her seat.

“When we get there I have to run next door.” Hotan was still staring out his window, watching buildings pass as they made their way through the city.

I need to clear my head. Maybe breaking off from Kyle and Shellie will help me gather my composure again. Why am I breaking apart so easily?

“No problem.” Kyle turned the car left, he had lost his normal cheerful mood. “Go clear your head, man.”

Shellie looked over at him watching the reflection of his face on the glass of the car window. “Why? Is everything ok?”

“I have to walk around the block to 7even’s and talk to Chaz. After that I want to stop at that bookstore across the street to ask the owner about something.” He turned to face her with a stern expression, still set on limiting what Shellie should know. “Is that ok?”

“I was just curious. I have no reason to worry. At least you have Kyle involved, and the fact you are no longer trying to deal with it alone makes me feel a tad better.” Looking away, he could see her body language screamed that she was angry that she could not be his shoulder to lean on.

Sorry, Shel. I can’t tell you about things that I still don’t completely believe in myself either.

“We’re here!” Kyle chimed as he parallel parked a few feet from the entrance to Benny’s Place. “Hooray! Hamburgers!”

“See you guys in a few minutes.” Hotan was out of the car before Kyle had even turned it off.

“But aren’t you hungry?” Shellie was struggling out of the back of the mustang. She smoothed out her beige skirt and straightened her white petite shirt. “I haven’t seen you eat anything today. In fact, you haven’t been eating much at all.”

“Annie invited me to have dinner with her and my sponsor.” He cleared his throat to reassess himself. “Order me some fries.” She’s right. I am forgetting to eat, and I don’t feel hungry or tired like I normally would by now. Am I really becoming immortal? Or is my mind making me think I no longer need food?

“Ok.” She hugged him tight, kissing his cheek before walking inside the restaurant with Kyle.

Hotan headed in the other direction, making his way through the crowded sidewalk. A meter maid was humming happily as she wrote a ticket for a car near a bum as he walked pass.

Sometimes I can’t help but wonder about the irony in life. That bum has change in his cup, and the person who gave it to him is probably the one getting that ticket right now. Was that really worth the risk? Will you be compensated for taking a leap of faith, small or large, in the long-run? How much risk do I need to take to see a positive result? I’ve never done anything that I couldn’t see the end product right away or knew the definite outcome. Have I been wasting my life this whole time? Was I thinking about life incorrectly? Am I not the aftermath of someone else’s risk? How much longer will this recoil continue? He’s not even here to see what he’s done; let alone the destruction of my life.

I just get the unnerving feeling that it’s more astronomical than what it’s started as. It’s unfair that the person who put this domino effect into play no longer exists. I’m taking the heat for this, all alone, just because I look like him and inherited his element! What was this supposed to be like? How am I to fix someone else’s mistake if I don’t understand how he even used the power? What mistake was made in the first place to have to erase yourself from existence? All I know is that if I figure out what went so wrong with HIM, I might be able to figure out a way to put things in order. I may not be the original Hotan, but I definitely don’t want to see this ordeal stretch out much longer. I just want to be done with this whole otherworldly matter and go back to my simple day-to-day life.

The crosswalk sign read walk and he crossed with a few other people. Walking into a nearby building, he was greeted by a gloomy, smoke-filled club. Loud laughter came from one of the large corner booths as it echoed throughout the empty space. He walked over to see Chaz and a few of his employees in a thunderous chatter. A burst of laughter came from the group as he approached, almost startling him. It seemed a daily ritual for all of them to hang out before getting their day started.

“Hey there!” Hotan stopped at the edge of the table, slouched with his hands in his pockets. “You got a minute?”

“Hey Hotan! What are you doing here so early?” Chaz’s loud voice echoed through the empty bar as he held his mug of beer high, cigar gritted in his teeth. “Come to join us?”

“No, actually, I needed to ask you about doing me a huge favor.” Chaz sat his mug down and puffed on his cigar a moment as he listened. “It’s not too big of a favor to be honest.

“No, no favors, not to the likes of you.” A cocky guy smirked, taking a puff of his cigarette, bellowing the smoke into the air towards Hotan. “You’re just a brat.”

“Why don’t you shut up, Erik.” A bartender sitting across from him flicked a peanut shell at him and giggled. “Stop teasing the kid!”

Chaz leaned back in his seat, ignoring the others. “What’s the favor first off?”

“I need to hold auditions for a bassist this weekend. Preferably, Saturday morning, before you open up if you don’t mind. We plan on entering in the Big Band competition, but my current bassist is only seventeen.” Hotan huffed his lungs clear of smoke. “But if you can’t, I understand. We’ll just have to see where else we can do it, since I’ve had better luck on the weekends for auditions.”

“Hmm,” Chaz rubbed his chin with his left hand. “Let me think.”

“Oh let them do it, Chaz.” The bartender took a bite out of her sandwich. “You know they deserve to compete!”

“No. They’re not going to make it in the competition anyway.” Erik put his cigarette out in the glass ashtray grinning. “Not like they can really play or sing. They don’t have what it takes, I would know from experience. No one will want to sign a contract with a high schooler.”

“How about you light yourself another cigarette and shut your trap before I shove that ashtray up your ass.” Hotan shot him warning glance. “We play just fine. I want to see how we measure up, not aiming to win.”

He’s been angry ever since his band failed to get past the first round and broke up before trying again.

“What’s wrong? Did I hit a nerve?” Erik leaned back a sheepish grin across his face. “Not aiming to win is like saying you’re aiming to lose.”

“Nerve? Never,” Hotan countered his grin with a casual smirk. “But how about you stop before you fall on your face again? Better yet, how about doing yourself a huge favor and take that grin off your face and show some respect for a fellow musician.”

“Ok, enough already.” Chaz broke the tension, clearing his throat. “You can hold auditions, as long as you’re out of here before 2 PM and before I get here to open at 4. Makes sure it’s clean, deal?”

“No Problem. Thanks a lot Chaz.” Waving, he turned heading out the door. “See you guys later.”

Backtracking his route, Hotan made his way across the busy street to the front of the old bookstore. A gust of cold wind blew pass him with the scent of rain on it. The sky was filling with dark gray clouds that sped past, slowly darkening the town. Taking in a deep breath, enjoying the smell, he turned to the bookstore walking inside.

“Hello?” Once more, no one was within sight.

He walked over to the counter where he first had met Tina, the Bookstore owner. Cautiously he leaned over it, but found the other side empty. Nothing more than an old cushioned stool. Taking a long steady stare down the web covered aisle way, it was hard to make much out with it overran by books. Rubbing the back of his neck, he braved to get a closer look. Down its dark canyon light from the front of the store and windows failed to penetrate the dust covered shelves.

Jerking, books fell off the shelf near his face on his left. Stifling backwards, he smashes into the rock solid shelf behind him.

“You!” Tina’s voice rasped sending chills across his body.

Slowly opening his eyes, her face glared at him from an opening in the shelf where the books had fallen. “How’d you get on that side?”

Tina grinned wide. “It’s my store! I can go where I want!”

He tried to focus on what he was going to ask. “Are you familiar with, well, the whole powers thing?”

She has to know. Between the book and the way she acts, I get the gut wrenching sensation she is aware of everything.

“Powers? If you are asking if you are sane, yes. You are very sane.” Busting out laughing caused him to flinch, but she abruptly stopped, her wild grin gone. “Why you ask that? You’re so silly. You know what they are, what you are. Are you crazy or something? Oh! Did you lose yourself? I do that all the time…”

“I don’t know exactly how our elemental powers work. I figured you might know something since last time you said you were one of us.” He started picking up the books he had knocked off the shelf he had slammed into. “I can’t feel anything.”

“Ok.” She nodded, pinching her bottom lip with her top teeth. “What do you know so far? I still don’t understand why you are asking me though. Oh! OH-oh! A friend is coming, they can explain!”

“A friend? Who can explain?” He could feel his pulse race. “I don’t know if that’s a-”

“You know him!” Tina spun in circles, still imprisoned behind her own bookshelf. “He speaks in my head too!”

“Callan? The one that talked to me in my head.” There was no change to Tina’s spinning. “What could he help me with?”

Hotan slid to the ground, covering his face with his hands.

Why did I think someone so mentally off-balance would be coherent enough to give me answers? She’s asking random questions, and I am only assuming she knows what I am talking about.

The bell on the front door jingled. Hotan’s pulse raced as he heard the door close again. Reluctant, his nerves and muscles taut, he looked to see who had entered the long forgotten bookstore.

A tall, pale man in his twenties stood blocking the entrance. His straight, long black hair was pulled back in a low ponytail and he stared at Hotan with eyes the color of a silvery blue. His attire was gothic in styling with a black shirt with fishnet sleeves and his baggy jeans covered in chains.

Thank God it’s not Geliah…

“Hotan,” The man crossed his arms, his voice familiar. “I wanted to meet with you in person, but my time will be short.”

“Callan?” Scrambling to his feet, Hotan knew that had been the voice that had echoed through his head earlier. “If you are here, then, where is Geliah.”

“Indisposed for the moment.” Stress riddled his face and voice as he spoke, “Now that I am here, I can see what you were trying to express to me. I’m sorry to have burdened you, but perhaps I can aid you in some way.”

“I don’t think anyone can help me at this point. Talib seemed clueless on what exactly is going on with me.” He stared down at his hands, feeling disconnected with his own body. “I cannot be the person all of you need me to be. He’s gone, and I am left with powers I can’t even feel.”

“You are feeling them, but the element of rebirth is not in balance.” A glow came from Callan’s out stretched hand and an orb of water formed. It took a moment before a flawless sphere of water floated there. “Our powers are normally smooth, balanced. Like this sphere of water. Constantly in motion, but never conflicting with itself. Your power feels like this,” The sphere contorted and started spiking out randomly everywhere and spun in a wobbled motion. “It’s as if the element of Rebirth is in a tug of war or even half open. Something is interfering with your powers, but there is nothing that any of us are aware of that could disrupt any of the elements in such a way.”

“Even so, being that chaotic, shouldn’t I be able to feel it?” He watched the ebb and flow of chaos the water sphere stood for.

My whole life looks like that.

Callan’s water ball evaporated in a blink of an eye and he placed a knuckle on his chin, deep in thought. “I think you can only feel the parts that spike out, as if something deeper inside you is blocking the power. Those spikes are barely noticeable, as if a breeze passing by.”

“Voice, voice in my head? Gah!” She scrunched her eyes and fell from his sight, wailing. “No! Go away! Not you! I no like you anymore!”

Hotan backed away. “What’s wrong? Are, are you ok, Tina?”

“He won’t stop talking to me!” The shelf shook as she banged into it. “Damn you! Stop singing that song! Gah! No! Not this again!”

“Callan?” He mumbled, backing into the other shelf again. Looking over, Callan had left as if he had been a phantom. “Where? What’s happening?”

“Geliah!” Her face popped back up in the opening in the bookshelf, smiling. “Now where were we? Oh yes, umm, power!”

Swallowing he tried to relax again. “Is there anything else you can tell me?”

“I don’t,” She stopped a moment as the tattering of rain started to fill the silence of the store. “Is it raining?”

“Umm,” Glancing out her glass door he saw it had started to pour down hard. “Yeah, it’s raining.”

“Gah!” Her head twitched to the left as her right eye squinted. “My books! They’ll all be wet! Must protect books from rain!”

She started shrieking and hissing as she shook the shelf. Books were falling into the aisle and onto Hotan. Stammering out of the way and towards the door, it was clear that asking questions out of Tina was not a viable option. Her screams and slurs of unrecognizable words were pounding at his ear drums.

The rain and wind of the storm hit him, his eyes squinting to keep it from obscuring his sight as he attempted to cross the street. Hurrying out of the rain into the restaurant, he shook the water from his shirt and hair. Shellie was sitting at their usual booth eating a hamburger.

“So how’d it go?” She had paused from her meal as he sat down, soaked from the rain.

“Chaz said we could use the club Saturday morning.” Hotan took a fry from a side plate.

Hopefully this makes her feel better if I eat something. I hope I can manage to meet with Callan again. He might be able to help me balance and unlock the chains on the element of Rebirth if he’s that sensitive in sensing it within me.

“That’s good.” Shellie took a sip of her coke. “What about the bookstore? How’d that go?”

“I was wondering about that too.” Kyle slid back into the booth from where ever he had disappeared to. “Did that bookstore loon have any more information?”

“Oh.” Hotan creased his forehead and looked out the window where the bookstore was hazed out of sight by the rain. “Not so well. She’s not having a good day at all, and I got no answers.”

Shellie took a bite of her food looking over at him a moment, swallowing she asked, “Why’d you bother to walk in there? No one ever does.”

“Foosh,” Kyle managed to swallow his food then cleared his throat. “She’s the one that had a rare book we were looking for. We were hoping she could give us some more information on who the author was and where it came from.”

“Really?” Shellie turned to the bookstore, the rain was starting to soften. “I suppose she would have some rare and unique books.”

Hotan sighed taking a sip of Shellie’s drink. “I’ll let you know more later, Shellie, promise. I just have to clear my thoughts. Get everything in some sort of coherent order.”

“It’s already confusing.” She snuggled closer to him, but grimaced when she was reminded how wet he was. “Ah! You’re soaked!”

“Heh,” Hotan smiled looking down at her. “I love you too! Just don’t worry yourself to death over me on this. Let me take care of it on my own. Plus, I’ve got Kyle to help me on this one.”

“Fine.” She huffed at him, but the worry on her face didn’t subside.

Chapter Thirteen

Hotan knocked at Annie’s apartment door and waited a few minutes. He looked at his cell phone seeing that the time was 7:28 PM. Still, no one answered. Leaning his back against the door, crossing his arms, he started zoning out. Staring at a crack in the far wall, he let his thoughts trail off.

One of these weekends, I need to see about going around fixing those, possibly repainting the yellowing white halls. Annie needs to start making a no smoking policy around here so I don’t feel like I have to paint every year. Maybe she can just pick out a darker color, anything but white would help. This building isn’t getting any younger I suppose. School’s almost over, and like I promised her, I’ll start doing heavier repairs this summer to get this place back up to speed.

Today has been frustrating and confusing. It’s been too long of a day for all that has gone on back-to-back. A quiet dinner would be nice. I can forget about sleeping tonight. Callan, Tina, this whole concept of power being locked up. What is going on inside of me? What could be holding these abilities back with so much force?

Hopefully tomorrow won’t be chaotic. Hell, I can’t believe the last few weeks. Seems like everything’s starting to blend together. It’s all rushing by much faster and I can’t keep track of what day it is anymore. I can’t handle several days like this in a row, not when I am having a hard time deciphering what’s real anymore.

“Hey there!” Annie’s voice broke his thoughts as she came around the corner carrying two grocery bags. “Sorry, had last minute shopping to do. Jake should be on his way.”

“Jake?” Grabbing the bags from her, she managed to get her keys in order so she could unlock her door. “You mean Jacob?” Great, now she’s got a casual nickname for this guy.

“Yeah, Jake, Jacob, no big difference, it’s a nickname.” She pushed the door open and flipped on the lights to reveal her Japanese themed apartment. “Here we go.”

“So, what’s for dinner?” Following her to the kitchen, he laid the bags on the counter. “Is it something simple or fancy?”

“Umm,” Annie threw her jacket on the coat rack and slipped her sandals off next to it. “Does spaghetti sound ok, with some Garlic bread and meatballs?”

“Sounds good to me,” Shrugging, he headed over to the coat rack to take off his boots. “Can’t remember the last time I had an actual home cooked meal.”

“Well, it’ll be a good change for you then. It’s been a while since you’ve been over for dinner.” Annie pulled a frying pan off its hanging place, setting it on the stove as she turned on two of the burners for the setting of high. “Are you going to be ok with eating dinner with Jake and me? Because if you’re going to feel uncomfortable say so, I’ll just give you the leftovers. Don’t feel forced to be here, Hotan. I think he said he has a friend tagging along anyhow. Guess it’s hard for him to break from his job.”

“No it’s fine.” Watching her rhythm in the kitchen was intriguing. Annie was the queen of multitasking as she boiled the water, rolled balls of hamburger meat adding various spices and herbs to them while chatting to him. “Want me to set the table while you do that? Anything you need help with?” She always seems to be doing a million things at once, but it never seems to break her focus for it all.

“Yeah, the plates are in the cabinet behind me and the silverware is in the drawer by the sink there. I appreciate the extra set of hands, I am running so late today.” She smiled, turning the heat on the frying pan up and adding olive oil to it. “And if you don’t mind, when you’re through with that, I’ve turned the oven to 450 so when it beeps, pop that frozen garlic bread in the oven. You can find a flat baking pan in the cabinet below the sink.”

She’s going to make an awesome mom later in life. “Sounds fair enough,” Pulling out four plates and cups, he headed to the large dinner table. “Thanks for making all these arrangements so I can get to know my sponsor. It’s very awkward and with you here maybe it’ll smooth things over.” But there won’t be a chance to talk about anything. Not unless… no. I don’t know how to talk to someone in telepathic manner like Callan.

“Aw, no problem.” She plopped the meatballs in the frying pan, poured the noodles into the bubbling water on the back burner and continued buzzing about the kitchen. “You’re like a little brother to me, we’re practically family.”

“So, are you and Jake serious about each other?” Glancing over at Annie, he continued placing each plate and cup in its proper spot. She was smiling to herself, her cheeks growing red. “I take it I was right on that notion.”

“Hotan, it’s the most serious relationship I’ve had in a long time. Then again, we haven’t been seeing each other long enough for me to say if it’s just for fun or a solid deal. We have so much in common. Besides the fact he’s a workaholic, he always wants to do stuff together when he has the time.” Washing her hands in the sink, she continued, “And the- well, never mind I kind of lost my train of thought there. I told him he needed to spend some of that free time with you. Figure out a way to get to know you. I’ve told him a lot about what I know you’ve been through; hope that wasn’t over stepping it.”

“No, you didn’t overstep. Got to live a little I suppose.” Smirking, he walked up beside her, pulling out some silverware to head back to the table with. “You’re a big girl, Annie. Running an apartment complex and a caretaker of a teenage orphan. You can say you’re a workaholic as well.” So Talib and them are aware of my past after all.

“No, really, my train of thought just,” A knock at the door cut her short and she immediately dried her hands on the nearby washcloth. “I’ve got it.”

“Alright.” Finished with laying the silverware, he walked over to the sink opening up the white cabinet doors below. As instructed, he pulled out a cookie sheet placing the garlic bread on it. Maybe having dinner here will give me a chance to get to know them instead of being overloaded with his whole crazy immortals thing. I may end up liking him, who knows. A nice sane conversation with these people who’ve shoved their way into my life.

“Hey Annie!” A familiar voice greeted her at the door. That voice sounds familiar. Who is at Annie’s door? Jacob? “And this is my friend Timothy.”

“Nice to meet you!” Annie’s friendly voice responded, but Hotan was unable to make out Timothy’s voice. “Well, have a seat in the living room while I finish cooking. Hotan’s been here helping me already, shouldn’t take much longer.”

Annie walked back into the kitchen, stirring the noodles before turning her full attention to the frying pan and meatballs. Hotan glanced at her for a moment as she rolled the last of the meatballs and added them into the frying pan. Looking into the living room, he noticed one man was sitting and the other was standing, both talking noisily. He recognized the man standing from the night in the laundry room.

That has to be Jacob then. The man with the purple eyes.

Jacob was laughing boastfully as he stood in front of his friend. All Hotan could see was the back of Jacob’s friend. Raising an eyebrow, he failed once more to hear the man’s voice.

Is Jacob’s friend one of us? Or truly just another acquaintance?

“So,” Turning his attention back to the task-at-hand, Hotan continued his conversation with Annie. “I’m glad you two hit it off. Hope it works out to the end. You’ve always been like a big sister and well, you deserve to be happy.”

“I think it will. I appreciate the fact you see me like family.” She flipped the burner with the noodles off, carrying the pot over to the sink. “Can you hand me that noodle strainer hanging over there? I suppose I am as much of a big sister as any other. I did start off as your babysitter in the beginning.”

Grabbing up the strainer, he handed it to her, watching her drain the noodles. “Have you ever met his friend before? He seems soft spoken.” At least they can’t hear my questions from here.

“No.” She plopped the noodles back into the pot and returned it to the burner. “I think it’s more of a business associate kind of friend. Jake says it’s hard to escape work, perhaps he improvised for tonight”

“Hmm,” Opening the oven, he placed the garlic bread in it, closing the oven door. “Guess we’ll see tonight depending where the conversation goes.”

“Always observing people, why so cautious? Do you ever relax?” She sighed as she opened up a cabinet full of food and searched through it. “Now where on earth did I put that big jar of sauce?”

“My life’s been hard, and it’s not getting easier. I used to have time to relax, but not anymore.” He popped open the jar of spaghetti sauce that he had blocked from her view on the counter behind him. “I don’t think I’ll ever get to rest nor sit back and enjoy life. Every time it seems to slow down and settle, something comes along and kicks up the dust in my face. I can’t count how many times it’s left a bad taste in my mouth.”

“Oh really?” Grabbing the jar from him, she added it to the noodles and pulled the frying pan from the stove. “Maybe you’ve got things all wrong? I hope you’re wrong about that. I know I thought the same thing at one point, but things have gotten a lot easier since then. You just have to work a little harder to see the more positive side of what’s going on. Makes life a lot easier that way, you know. Take a deep breath and be positive.”

“Hey, babe?” Jacob came into the kitchen, wrapping his arms around her and kissed her softly on the cheek. “Is it done yet? I am starving!”

“Hold on, all I have to do is mix it all together and it’ll be ready to serve.” She smiled and kissed him on the lips before he released his wrap on her. “Patience is a virtue, now go behave yourself.”

“So, how are you doing, Jacob?” Hotan lifted an eyebrow as he leaned against the counter. Jacob was wearing iron pressed slacks and a white button up shirt. Clearly, he came straight from work. “Been a while since I’ve seen you around, I guess.”

“Good, and sorry about that, I am working on getting things changed up so I can get more time with you.” Jacob’s purple eyes glinted at Hotan, demanding a solid exchange. “How are you doing? Taking care of yourself? I hope you’re staying out of trouble. Better yet, I hope trouble is staying out your way.”

“Fine, just fine.” Narrowing his eyes at Jacob, he took in a deep breath. “So what do you do for a living? I don’t think I’ve had a chance to find more out about you. Our last visit was so, short.”

“Oh me?” Jacob’s coy smile crawled across his face as he ignored the condescending glare from Hotan, shrugging playfully. “I’m just a simple business man. I hate the fact they make me wear a suit all the time at headquarters, but, then again, I like special assignments. The fact that all rules go out the window at that point is a refreshing break from the normal. I was quite a rule breaker when I was younger too.”

“Interesting,” Seeing it was time to take the bread out; he broke his stern look from Jacob. “Bread’s done.”

“Yup,” Annie carried the pot of spaghetti over to the black rectangle table. “Time to eat!”

“Yo! Timmy, food.” Jacob’s glance at him hadn’t broken nor had the grin on his face. Walking over to where Annie was filling the plates with food, he stretched his arms out. “Oh! It smells so good!”

Hotan grunted to himself as he took up a towel to retrieve the pan from the oven. Pulling a large knife from the drawer, he sliced it before carrying it over to the table. Jacob pulled out a chair for Annie, gently pushing her in like a true gentlemen. Curiously, he took the seat across from her. Hotan sat next to him, hoping to avoid a stare down the whole time.

Hotan’s stomach rumbled for the first time in a long time and found himself captivated by the plate of spaghetti in front of him. It then ached as the smell of the garlic bread joined the symphony of smells and overwhelmed him. Breaking his attention from the meal, he looked up at Timmy who was taking his seat across from him. The muscles tightened in his jaws at he stared on in disbelief.

“You ok, Hotan?” Annie’s voice was soft and motherly. “You look pale all of the sudden, you coming down sick? You never get sick.”

“No. I, I’m fine.” Hotan glowered across the table, his stomach no longer aching from hunger, but astonishment. “I’m fine, just, tired.”

“Hi, I’m Timothy Bithloa.” Talib smiled gently at him as he brushed his hair from the front of his face. “Nice to meet you, Hotan.”

“Hi.” Swallowing hard, he glared into Talib’s pale blue eyes who stared back with his overpowering aura.

“Now let’s bow our heads for a short moment of thanks. Sorry, it was something my dad always did and well, now that he’s gone, I like to keep it going.” Annie broke the tension as her voice cut through everyone’s thoughts, slicing peace among them. “Lord, I want to thank you for your Love and comfort and thank you for this moment of gathering in which we may eat together in your honor. I pray that the food you have provided for us will nourish our bodies so that we shall remain in good health. Amen.”

“Amen.” They mumbled reverently as they all raised their heads and began to eat.

“Mmm,” Jacob slurped a few noodles into his mouth and grinned widely. “Man, can you cook. You’re amazing, Annie! If this keeps up, you’ll have me fat and round like a turkey.”

“I was raised to take care of myself. My Dad became ill and well, I had to take care of him before he passed away.” Annie sighed as she twisted noodles around her spinning fork. “I don’t mind it though. Brings back good memories.”

“There is nothing wrong with such an ability.” Tim smiled at her as he sipped his iced tea. “It is very becoming of you.”

“Makes you a well-rounded girl.” Hotan managed a smile to her as he began to eat. His hunger was overriding his urge to scream at Talib. He could only stare at him in disdain as he ate.

“That’s right. He’s got a point, Annie.” Jacob winked at her playfully as he took a gulp of his tea. “Wonderful.”

“Oh you guys stop.” She finally smiled again, eating some of her spaghetti.

“Never.” Hotan joked, but turned his attention to ‘Timothy Bithloa once more.

“So, what do you do for a living, Mr. Bithloa?” Annie questioned politely, taking a bite from her garlic bread.

“Oh, well I own a real estate company in the area.” Talib continued with his cordial smile.

Oh really? Hotan thought loudly to himself. I just wish you could hear me. In fact, I hope you can hear me, Timothy. What a name! Like there isn’t anything weird about a guy in his late twenties with light gray hair. Sure, a name change will cover that unique identifier for sure…

“Wow. So, do you own any property in this area yourself? Or do you just sell it?” Annie paused her eating a moment becoming very interested in him.

“Yes I do. A very old piece in fact. It has been passed down in my family for generations so I do not have the heart to sell it.” Talib shot a quick look over at Hotan, his eyes wide. When did you learn this? It is a little early for you to transfer your thoughts.

“Oh wow, where at?” She spun her fork again in her plate, wrapping it with saucy noodles as she continued the conversation. “What a wonderful thing to inherit!”

“Isn’t it the old church by the local high school?” Jacob asked, joining the conversation. “That massive cathedral?”

Well, I guess be careful what you wish for. Let’s just say Callan helped. Hotan took another large bite of his food as he sat in complete silence. Anyhow, why would it be too early? Wouldn’t it be a good thing that I finally figured out how to do something, anything, on my own? I doubted this whole having powers thing, but this shouts you’re not pulling my chain after all.

“The Cathedral down on 24th street, it is by a local high school.” Talib ate his spaghetti with much delight, his smile never failing. Because it may cause you some problems and it only gives Geliah an easier way of entering your thoughts. What did Callan want from you? I assume he wanted something from you.

“So it is by the school. Get many vandals?” Jacob took a big bite of food, chewing questioningly at Talib as the tension in the looks between him and Hotan grew.

So, you’re the one who owns it, the old church. Go figure. Hotan paused, looking at him in surprise. Callan needs my help. To be honest, he needs me to help him escape. Apparently, where he’s at he can’t speak to me when someone else is there. I think he’s trapped and in trouble with Geliah. Anyhow, I doubt Geliah’s going to read my thoughts so easily.

“Hey, isn’t that where you go all the time Hotan?” Annie looked at him, but he wasn’t giving her a response, still exchanging a strange look with Talib. “Hotan? Are you sure you’re ok?”

“Huh?” Breaking his concentration, Hotan turned to look at her, his face slightly red from feeling embarrassed. “Yea, I go there all the time. I enjoy the history. Sorry if I was trespassing, but there were never any signs, and well, it being a church I didn’t really think it was an issue.”

“We mainly get visitors which wards off vandals. I like to keep such a place open to the public, since it is quite a sight to see. It has been renovated completely.” Talib took a sip of his drink trying to hide the smirk aimed at Hotan. Thank you for that by the way.

“I hate high school punks.” Jacob mumbled biting a chunk out of his garlic bread, leaning back in his chair as he chewed. Yea, watch out for Geliah. He’s a tricky bastard. Last we heard, Callan was on his side, but ole Geliah has been pulling some mean tricks over the last couple of years.

“Oh wow! It’s been renovated?” Annie took a sip of her tea. “Why didn’t you tell me, Hotan? I would love to go see it now that it’s been redone! Oh how wonderful!”

“Uh,” Looking at Jacob, Hotan could feel the ghostly complexion taking over his face. “I’ve been busy. Guess it slipped my mind. Um, anyway, I’m entering the Big Band competition.” You can hear me too?

“Hey, that’s cool. I was hoping to hear that you and your band would take advantage of the competition. Let me know how I can help!” Jacob grinned at him. What’s wrong? Didn’t know someone else was listening in Hotan? That’s what Talib was trying warning you about, we can’t turn down the volume for you. We have no idea how long it will take us before we can help you. Until then you’re broadcasting your thoughts worldwide, buddy.

“That’s right! You can enter this year since you’re 18.” Annie smiled, unaware of the alternate conversation circling the table. “How exciting!”

“Well I wish you the best of luck.” Talib took a bite of his food. Jacob, stop taunting him. I think he now realizes the trouble. Best thing to do is try and master it to the best of your abilities. You can only communicate to other immortals, so it is limited on who you can contact. Perhaps Kyle can help you?

“Thanks.” Sighing, Hotan stared down at his half-eaten plate, his appetite fading. “But I need to find a bassist. Chaz is letting me use the club for auditions on Saturday morning.” So now I have to master it, huh? Well, I assumed that it was only among us that it would work. Maybe I can practice it with Kyle.

“That’s nice of him. Chaz is a good man.” Jacob took another bite of his spaghetti. Well, you guys are boring. I figured you’d start up some sex stories or something worth listening to. Speaking of which, how’s Saphellia doing T-man? Is she adjusting ok?

“Cool. Wish I knew someone who could help you out.” She stood up and walked her plate into the kitchen.

“It’s fine. I think I can handle this.” Hotan finished his plate. Saphellia? Who’s that? What else are you not telling me? How many of us are in the area? Why are we all gathering? Doesn’t this seem strange? Even alarming?

“Man Annie! This spaghetti’s good!” Jacob filled his plate full again, grinning widely. Uh oh, seems like Big Bro hasn’t told the baby everything. How ironic, don’t you think that’s uncalled for T-man? I mean we really can’t afford to waste time. We can’t wait for him to figure everything out and remember things, and who knows how long that might take or if it’ll ever happen?

“A bassist?” Talib swallowed hard and paused a moment. She is fine, and I have not told him much. Only what he needs to know for now. I do not want to overload him with our whole history just yet, small pieces here and there. I am fully aware we are running out of time to prepare him and I- never mind.

“Yea,” Hotan leaned back in his chair and narrowed his eyes at Talib. Running out of time until what? What am I supposed to prepare for, Talib? I need to know more. I don’t think I’ll remember anything. Why leave it to chance and just spit it all out. The more I know the better the chances for me to figure this entire thing out.

“So do you plan on making flyers and so forth for that?” Jacob stuffed his mouth full of food again. You didn’t at least tell him that? Damn Talib, and here I thought you were the one with the best judgment on these kinds of things. I think you’ve gotten rusty over time. We barely have a year to prep him!

“Yep, got some of the school kids to spread the word.” Hotan took in a deep breath. A year for what? I would really like to know, especially since it involves mainly me. What do I need to prepare for?

“That’s good.” Talib left his last bite on the plate and leaned back in his chair, feeling the weight of Jacob’s stare. I have said too much. It is much too soon to bring up the matter. Too much at once would do more harm than good for all our sakes. You will have to wait.

“Are you guys ok?” Annie cleared her throat picking up Hotan and Talib’s plates. “You all keep acting weird, and giving these really strange looks and so forth. Am I missing out on something? Do you two know each other?”

“What on earth do you mean, babe? I’ve been eating mostly.” Jacob took another large mouthful of his spaghetti and chewed it in exults. Dammit, you two are going to get me in trouble with my girl here. If you do, you’ll both owe me. Let’s save this argument when we are alone. Come on.

“Uh, sorry if I have been rude somehow…” Talib laughed nervously.

“Excuse me.” Hotan stood up, looking over at Annie reluctantly. “I’ve had a long day and I’m not feeling so great. The meal was excellent and I’ve enjoyed eating with you all. Sorry to leave, it seems every time we get a chance to visit each other Jacob, it’s been cut short, so sorry.”

“Uh, ok.” Annie followed him over to the door. “See you tomorrow and good luck with those auditions.”

“Bye!” Jacob waved as he continued to chew his food with his cheeks puffed out.

“Farewell.” Talib’s voice seemed parsimonious.

Hotan walked out, feeling instant relief from the tension when her apartment door clicked shut. Regret poured over him as he thought of Talib.

Jacob is looking better by the moment, besides his tendency of being nosy about everything. Never did find out who this Saphellia person was or what was happening in a year. Why did I decide to leave so suddenly? In fact, I had no intentions to leave, yet, he paused in front of his door a moment pondering. Why did I leave with questions unanswered?

Opening his door, he slammed it behind him causing the room to fall into a dark shadow. Staring at the box on the table, he sat on his couch, recalling the conversation that Annie had not heard. Sighing, he leaned back into the soft worn-out couch, staring at his ceiling. There were too many thoughts flooding his to make them out. Closing his eyes, trying to slow down and focus, he needed to figure out when he had decided to leave in the first place.

Talib, that was why. Talib’s the element of Judgment and he can make you pass judgments to perform certain tasks, such as decide to leave. Talib made me leave.

A flashback flashed in his head of Geliah’s iniquitous smile and glare at the restaurant when he became sick with fear.

It wasn’t the fact that I saw him, but Geliah was who brought that strong feeling of fear. He controlled fear and therefore he could make someone fearless or fearful enough to be overwhelmed by it. This means Kyle could cause flames and make them go away. He could make a nuclear explosion disappear without a trace or cause one with the blink of an eye. In that case, what is my power and abilities? What can I do or take away from others? What did Rebirth do exactly?

A knock at the door interrupted his thoughts. Slowly opening it, he felt unsure of who could possibly be visiting him.

“Hey.” Jacob had a solemn look on his face as he stood there holding a container of leftover spaghetti. “Sorry about that. T-man can be harsh sometimes.”

“What do you want?” Hotan huffed walking away from his door, allowing Jacob to come in. “I figured that was my cue that the conversation had ended.”

“Just dropping the leftovers by, Annie was going to do it, but I volunteered. Felt someone owed you an apology.” He shrugged as he placed it on his counter shutting the door behind him. “Sorry about how sour things got at dinner.”

“It’s fine.” Flopping on his couch, he returned his gaze to the ceiling.

“Eh, Talib can be stubborn and he’s not the easiest guy to understand.” Jacob sat down next to him leaning on his knees. “I think this is the first time I’ve seen him act that way, towards you of all people. He’s been through a lot, seen a lot. Despite that, I just don’t know what is going on in his head. He has a plan I am sure of that much. Just what, I can’t say.”

“What is it that he won’t tell me?” Taking advantage of a possible second chance for answers, “What am I expected to do in a year?”

“Look, I would tell you, but it’s not my place to do so. I wasn’t the one who made the deal. It’s between you and him.” Jacob ran his hand through his hair, feeling wedged between the brotherly argument. “But I’ll do my best to do what I can for you. It’s a really shitty deal. You need help, you’re asking for it, and you deserve it. I can’t overlook that fact.”

“That’s easy for you to say. I already know that I won’t be remembering anything. Maybe that’s why he’s acting so stiff about it. I think he knows that. If he does, he’s most likely lost on what to do. I guess I can relate, this looming darkness of not knowing where to go next.”

“What makes you say that?” Jacob straightened his posture and looked at him. “You sound so sure.”

“He said I was a Rebirth of the element itself.” He took a deep breath as he stared at Jacob.

“You mean?” Jacob paused a moment as his face drained of color and his eyes widened. “He killed himself. He committed suicide! Are you sure?”

“What?” Hotan glared at Jacob feeling the weight of realizing his situation was about to become worse. “Suicide? I, I never thought of it that way, but, I suppose using your own power to get rid of yourself would qualify as doing that.”

Why did I not let the idea sink in that my predecessor killed himself to get out of immortality? Was it because the idea of immortals was still so surreal in my mind?

“Shit, you have to realize we can’t die like normal people. It’s either we kill each other or somehow by our own hand. If we are still under the reincarnation spell, we’re mortals. I died from the flu once, but after that we are put back into existence as someone else in a new generation.” Jacob covered his face with his hands trying to calm himself. “But the only way he could do it was to create a new version of himself. Jesus, it goes against the teachings we’ve always lived and depended on. What happened that would make him choose to send himself down that path? Oh God, and Talib, if he knows…”

“It was the only way for him to die.” Hotan rubbed the back of his neck, watching Jacob’s panicking body language. “We’re all in a lot of trouble, aren’t we? I mean, he did it to save everyone else. He was simply being a leader who cared for his people, right? What was he trying to achieve with that though, Jacob? I assume you guys might know.”

“Don’t tell Talib.” Jacob shot him a fearful look. “No one, I mean none of us, would have let him do it if we knew he would die in the making, especially Talib. All Hotan had left of any family was Talib, and Talib was brave enough to be our guardian. Even knowing that his wife and brother would never be able to know who he was, for all eternity. At that time, he braved that decision for his brother. There’s something wrong, very wrong. I have no idea why. Everything Talib has sacrificed is going up in flames as it stands. This is too much. He went too far. If Talib already knows, then so be it, but let’s not break that news to him until we know for sure.”

“What?” Wide-eyed, Hotan could feel the serious tone of the situation. “Why not? Shouldn’t we…”

“It would absolutely break his heart. To know that his little brother took his own life, that he hid the fact that he wouldn’t be safe like the rest of us as promised. Talib has given everything to his brother.” Jacob wiped away a tear running down his cheek. “I can’t believe it. He’s gone, and now we have you being tormented by all of this, and no guidance as to what went wrong. Moreover, you, Hotan, I am so sorry this whole ordeal was left on your shoulders. I don’t even know how to help you. You’re just a kid. You don’t deserve having all of this fall back on you.”

“What should I do then?” Vulnerable: it was the only sensation Hotan felt.

“I have no idea.” Jacob sighed, standing up, trying to get rid of the uneasy feeling starting to overload him. “We’ll just play it by ear; it’s all we can do. Handle it one piece at a time until we can figure out more. Maybe one of us could use our powers to help somehow.”

“What element are you?” No longer was Jacob the threat, but someone who was understanding of where Hotan stood.

“Well,” Jacob managed to smirk, “Lust, of course.”

“Lust?” Raising an eyebrow at him, he noted that Jacob was Annie’s new boyfriend. “Love, huh?”

“Oh yea.” He winked at Hotan.

“Every man’s dream, neh?” A coy smile crossed his face. “Make anyone fall in love with you at any given time.”

“Well, not exactly.” Jacob walked over to the door. “But it comes in handy sometimes. I don’t take advantage of it, if that’s what you’re wondering. About Annie and I, she’s a great girl and I simply want to be there for her. Nothing beats the real thing kid, nothing. I should know, I did have my rotten times.”

“Good to know.” No, he hadn’t used his powers on her.

“See you later. I’ll get back to you if I figure something out.” Jacob walked out, giving him no chance to ask any more questions.

Chapter Fourteen

Once more Hotan laid on his couch staring at the ceiling. Desperately he was trying to let everything settle. After a few minutes, he noticed his radio was still on and tried his best to zone out into the riffs and lyrics. Feeling overloaded, he didn’t know where to begin with this whole situation.

He committed suicide. If that’s the truth, then why was I able to dream about him? Then again, it was reincarnation of the element rebirth. Is it truly dying by rebirthing, reincarnating something? It is all confusing and it looks like things are just going to get worse. I have no one to go to or talk to. There is no way to explain it to anyone in order to get some sort of explanation. There are no answers for the millions of questions dragging me down. I could talk to Talib and Jacob, but they are nothing more than strangers to me. I can even go as far as blaming Talib for putting me in this horrible dilemma. It’s taking over my life. The life that I finally built for myself is being ripped away from me yet again.

He was staring incessantly at the ceiling as if rummaging through the nighttime stars. His thoughts scattered so far away and out, no longer within his reach to be coherent even to him. It was hard to take everything in even after weeks of dealing with the idea. Every corner that he turned only gave him the smallest morsel of a clue. Clues that left more questions about this surreal dimension he found himself now living in. Closing his eyes, slowing the flood he had created, he listened to the radio as it transitioned into another song.

Stone Sour’s ‘Bother’ came to his ears. They were one of the many bands that he enjoyed listening to from time to time. Anything he could relate to or reflected his status was always a welcome. Lately, it was the only link he had to the real world anymore. If the song could still reflect the things he was experiencing, then he must still be in touch with reality. It was so hard trying to keep everything under his skin and pretend that he was okay, completely fine, with what was happening to him. He was the reason why everything turned out this way, yet he felt no responsibility for the events now playing out.

Was there any difference in who I am and the first Hotan? Why is the finger being pointed at me for a crime I did not commit? My own creator is framing me, someone who I’ll never physically see, someone in which I have dreamed only once about. Even so, what evidence did I have of his existence? I am in my very own biblical story, but where is my place and what role am I to play? Am I the hero or prophet in this tale, or possibly, the fallen one, needing help? Am I the one seeking the light? Or, am I the dark one, sent to destroy what everyone grew to love? He shuddered at the idea.

Rubbing his eyes with the bottoms of his palms, he rolled over to his side. Looking over at the stack of photo albums, he was frantic to stop the dark thoughts from resurfacing. Remembering he wanted to look through the albums, he straightened himself on the couch, pulling the pile onto his lap. Wiping the thick dust from the covers, he hoped to find some clue to who they once belonged to.

As he made his way to the last album he paused, frightened by the nostalgic sensation that washed over him. This was his mother’s photo album. He remembered seeing it as a child. His mother would bring it out on those lonesome nights recalling a life she had tucked away. Taking in a deep breath, hesitating to open the heavy book. Forbidden, forgotten, by him this whole time until now. Weighing the emotions that had come over him, judging carefully, he was ready to open this monument of his mother’s life. With another breath, he opened the cover.

A picture of a younger version of his mother with friends in arms was the first image displayed. Laughing as the picture was taken, it was nice to see her smile for a change. He found a sense of closure as he stared at her. Remembering how concerned and proud she was at everything he did.

He would never forget that eerie knock on the door. It had startled him out of his sleep at 1:13 AM on that cold Wednesday night. His mom had just left for her night job. Wondering if perhaps she had forgotten something, or even her keys to the house, he opened the door. Two police officers greeted him at the door along with Annie who was wiping tears from her face.

His heart stopped, his body shivered, and all he felt was pain. A pain that could not be described in any physical sense ravaged through him in that instant. There was no need for words, he knew. His mother had left him behind, alone. He had no one left, nothing left. Over and over one word echoed in his thoughts:

ALONE

A drunk driver had crossed into her side of the road from the opposite side of traffic. Considering the speeds involved, it was no doubt that anyone who survived the crash would suffer life-threatening injuries. She had died before they could get her out of the car that had crushed around her like a metallic coffin. He had fallen to his knees as his life sucked away from him in a matter of seconds. It had been a hard life with just the two of them, and now it was just him. A kid out on the street, with nowhere to go, no one who cared, all existing family diminished. He had no one.

ALONE

The next couple of weeks he spent a lot of time packing up his mother’s things, selling what he could to gain money to give her a decent burial and headstone. Luckily, Annie helped him out tremendously with some of the funding. He insisted that she not help at all. After that, he went to court to file for his own guardianship, but the result was an agreement to put Annie as his guardian.

He managed to get a few small jobs near school. Took the city bus home or even walked on the nights that he worked pass the last run. After a while, he managed to get a small hand-me-down Yamaha motorcycle. Spent some of his sleepless nights fixing it up and repairing the odds and ends around the apartment. Paying back the money owed to Annie as much as possible. He was still living in an apartment in his complex, which Annie had inherited from her father.

Two years later, he now had a brand new Suzuki motorcycle, a great full time job performing at a club, an amazing girlfriend and finally, a curse. His bad luck continued to give him a hard life that he was trying to escape. Things would pull themselves together only for something else to come crashing through, shattering the pieces of his life to a point that gluing them back in place was inevitable.

Flipping through the pages, he continued seeing what looked like her high school friends. Images of cheerleading squads, various cliché groups in a cafeteria setting and even what looked like a drive thru movie scene. She was leaning on a black muscle car of sorts with the arms of a tall, well-built boy around her. It caught his interest, but it was faded in the corner and he could not make out the boy’s facial features. The next few pages were graduation photos with the grandparents he never knew. She was an only child and both his grandparents passed away before he was old enough to remember who they were. His chest tightened as he sped up his flipping of pages.

Alone…

He paused when he reached a group of pictures with just her and what looked like the boy in the earlier picture. He knew who he was. Hotan shared the same features with the dark eyed man: the jaw line, the build and even the solemn posture and tone he held in each picture. Whether he was smiling or not, he looked so much like him. He had jet-black hair and in the beach scene picture, he saw that he bore a tribal skull and cross bones tattoo across his back. This man left him and his mother behind. Never explaining who he was, his mother made it an obvious rule not to ask. This man had scarred her heart and ruined her life.

Continuing down the timeline of photos, he found wedding photos with the two of them.

She never told me they got married.

It was a simple wedding, a few friends in an old small church with no signs of the heartaches to come. Soon he came across pictures of her pregnant. At this point, there were no more pictures of him.

Did he really leave her because she was pregnant? Why would you marry someone and then just leave her to care for your son, alone? Shouldn’t it be a happy moment in his life? This must be the reason why she would never tell me. She was afraid I would blame myself. I was all she had and she could never be as cruel to accuse me for this, but it seemed as if she blamed herself.

Slamming the book closed, feeling frustrated, he huffed looking back down at the photo album.

Why did she keep this a secret? Where did he go?

A paper slightly sticking out of the back of it caught his attention. Reopening the book, he found several pieces of paper. All of them returned letters where she had attempted to write to him. Among them was one bearing an unfamiliar writing. Promptly he pulled it from the pile. It was a letter from him:

Sorry Loraine, I cannot stay any longer. I have failed you and myself and as for the little one to be, I thought it was impossible. I am unfit to raise a family let alone take care of you. Please forgive me for what I have to do.

Love,

I.

That’s it! That’s all he left her with for a goodbye?

Crushing the letter in his hand, he threw it across the room. Tears flowing down his face wouldn’t stop as the thoughts and memories rushed themselves upon him.

I was the mistake and excuse for my father leaving. Why did she insist on still having me knowing he would leave? Why would something like this cause a man to walk away? Shouldn’t her pregnancy have been considered a miracle and not a curse? Especially if it was considered impossible! I was a blessing and he threw it away and my mother with me. He’s right! He was unfit to take care of us! A man, no a father who was willing to leave his own child and lover to fend for themselves doesn’t deserve them in the first place.

The album slid from his lap falling to the floor as he held his head in his hands to stop the tears. A chiming sound caught his interest as it hit the floor. He paused in his crippled state and stared down at the gold necklace baring a simple black pearl. Picking it up, he noticed the chain tugged away from the pages of the book that had kept it for so long. Never had he seen it before, but remembered his mother was always a fanatic for black pearls. This must have been hers. Unlatching the clasp, he put the necklace on. He had been forced to sell all her other jewelry, at least this one remained.

Maybe it will bring me some luck for a change.

The alarm screaming from the bedroom brought him out of his heavy sleep. Most of the night he spent boiling over everything and at some point he had dozed off. Changing into fresher clothes, he scrambled to school. By passing the fact he barely made it to the end of his first period class, he went from class to class oblivious of the world around him.

Nothing mattered anymore, he had concluded his life was over. The lessons were irrelevant, no reason to uphold a conversation with anyone and he ignored the blur of life that buzzed around him. Most of the time he stared out the windows, his mind jumping back and forth from the dinner with Talib to the new information about his mother and his so-called father. He couldn’t decide which issue he should, more or less wanted, to think about.

Walking into the principal’s office with heavy shoulders, anyone could see the vacant expression on his face. His body reflected the depression that had beset him overnight. Mr. Piedmont greeted him warmly but it failed to breakthrough. Disconnected with everything, Hotan couldn’t tell if the old man saw how he felt.

“Here.” Mr. Piedmont handed some files to him as he walked up to his desk.

“What are these?” Looking at the large folder, he fought the urge to look under its cover.

“I need you to take that file to the police chief. We’re all tied up here today in the office and it’s a matter of urgency. I need you to go deliver those down town. You do know where the Police Headquarters is, right Hotan?” Giving him the happy old man grin, he turned Hotan around and walked him back to the door.

“Yea, it’s across from the Public Library. Is there anything else you need me to do while I’m in town?” He placed the file in his book bag between the Book of Ancients and his notebooks.

“Nope! When you do that, don’t bother to come back. I have too much to do here and it’s pointless to let you sit here for so long.” Mr. Piedmont patted his back as he walked him out the door. “Just be careful, Sonny. As Socrates says, the unexamined life is not worth living.”

“Uh, ok.” Leaving the school, Hotan made his way next door to the cathedral where he continued to park his motorcycle.

Standing inside the heavy oak doors that had shut behind him, he took a moment of peace. Looking beyond the statue, he took in all the shades of grey from the massive stained glass window that seemed so great to him. Enjoying the moment, he observed the image that it held, a classic Madonna with child. It was a piece that was common in the middle ages and especially in places of worship. Some unique elements set it apart from most pieces he had seen in his textbooks. In this picture, she was crying and looking up at the starry bright scenery above them. The child held loosely in her arms, his legs placed as if to show him moving, struggling almost.

A divine being, left so helpless in the arms of someone who did not understand why she had been chosen for such a delicate task.

It is getting annoying seeing things illuminated in color at random. Always the eyes of the other immortals, never anything I would like to see in color. I prefer to keep my moments of panic inside, but I feel so exposed when they flash themselves. Whatever that other force is that controls that part, I would gladly give it up completely. At the same time, I feel like that child; the pure innocence of his own existence, struggling against the forces that he has no knowledge of yet. Being held upwards, my struggles ignored, but pitied by those holding me there.

Maybe I’m finally starting to trigger my powers but they are putting me in danger. Anyone might be listening in right now, but I don’t care. Could it be as simple as letting my emotions override logic, or is there something deeper, more hidden keeping me from breaking lose the powers of Rebirth? Will I be able to even comprehend what’s waiting to be discovered when I can use them?

Starting up his motorcycle, he rode off towards the downtown area. Luckily, the streets were relaxed and not yet crowded. Everyone was still in school or at work making it a soothing ride through the skyscrapers. He pulled into a parking garage, grabbing the ticket from the machine. Jerking his helmet off, he let out a huff from the heat it had built up on the ride. Hot days were one of the cons of being a motorcyclist. That, and the infamous sting of rain. Hooking the helmet to the back part of the seat, he walked towards the Police headquarters next door. Pulling his hair back out of his eyes, he wiped his face free of sweat.

Not a cloud in the sky today.

The blast of cold air that greeted him was a pleasant reprieve. Giving his book bag to the security guard, he walked through the metal detector. The lobby was huge and bustling with police officers, criminals, and witnesses. The guard smiled as he handed him his bag. “Have a good day sir.”

“Thanks. Uh, where’s the police chief’s office?” The guard seemed the only available person for the question considering all the commotion. “I’m supposed to deliver a file to him.”

“Oh, well, why you need to see Mr. Kendall for that?” He looked Hotan over, unsure of why a teenager would need the Chief of Police directly for an everyday task. “You can leave it at the front desk over there.”

“Mr. Piedmont, the principal at West Heights High School sent me down here.” Hotan kept to the point, “I was told to deliver this file to him directly and immediately.”

“Oh! He said to keep an eye out for someone from the school!” A smile of relief crossed the man’s face. “I was looking for a teacher or something, sorry about that. Just head to the elevator there and you want the top floor. Once you’re there walk up to the receptionist for that level. She’ll help you.”

“Thanks man.” Hotan headed through the chaos as quickly as possible.

It’s a mad house in here.

“What floor?” A female officer asked as he slipped into the elevator just as the doors were closing. “What department are you looking for?”

“Top floor.” He leaned against the railing as the elevator creaked into motion.

“Wow, going to see the big wigs. You here to see Chief Kendall or the other guy?” She gave him an inquisitive look.

“Chief Kendall.” He shuffled as it stopped at her floor. “Have a good day.”

They nodded each other farewell and he continued his ascension to the top. The receptionist area was fairly large to be just that. There were three young ladies behind the huge counter, one busily writing as the other two were chatting away on their head sets. He quickly noticed from that room there was only two halls, one to the left the other to the right. The woman writing finished, looked up at him, and twisted her mouth. She was annoyed by the sight of a kid in her lobby. “Can I help you?”

“Here to see Chief Kendall.” He ignored the harshness in her voice. “I was told to-”

“You have an appointment?” She huffed, cutting him off. “He’s only seeing appointments today.”

“No.” His forehead creased as he prepared for the next statement.

Nothing is ever simple… is it?

“You need an appointment.” She flipped open a book. “And he’s not available until next week.”

“No, I don’t need an appointment.” Hotan sighed, preparing himself for the battle that was about to take place. “I was sent by Mr. Piedmont from the high school and was told I am to deliver something to Chief Kendall directly.”

“Well, I’m sorry. We were not informed to be expecting anyone.” She leaned back in her chair soaking up her supreme control. “I can make you an appointment. Morning or afternoon?”

“That’s funny.” A smug look surfaced as he accepted her challenge. “Why would the security guard know about me and not you? Is it really that disorganized around here? I would have thought you or maybe the other two would know about it?”

“He must have mistaken you for someone else.” She gave a sarcastic look and shrug. “Do you want me to make an appointment or not?”

“No, I want you to call Chief Kendall and ask him for yourself. He’s expecting me.” Hotan leaned on the counter and after a second of her not moving, he gave a courtesy shrug back. “Well, I’m waiting. I am sure he can take one question.”

“Keh, what nerve you have.” She grumbled under her breath as she straightened herself in her chair. “I’m sorry young man. The Chief is a very busy man and I certainly am not going to disturb him over something so ridiculous, especially a smart-mouthed kid like you.”

“Fine.” He sat down in a waiting chair, arms crossed.

“What are you doing?” Standing, she looked uneasy.

“Waiting.” His hands shifted to the back of his head, stretching his legs out in front of him. “I assume Mr. Kendall has to leave at some point. I’ll just wait right here for him.”

“That’s absurd.” She boasted.

“Why not? He’s going to eventually leave the office isn’t he? I hope he doesn’t live here. Now that’s absurd.” Glowering, he waited for her next move.

“You can’t be serious.” Her face was tense as she was beginning to enter uncharted territory. “You’re in the police station. I can call downstairs and you’ll be the one spending the night. Now if you don’t mind-”

“Whoa! At ease Rosey Doll!” A familiar voice came smashing into the room from the right hallway catching Hotan by surprise.

That voice. It can’t be. Could it? No.

“Oh! Mr. Kendall.” She straightened herself blushing uncontrollably. “So sorry for this whole matter! This young man refuses to make an appointment or leave. I was handling it just fine sir.”

“Well, I was expecting him.” The chief stayed out of view from where Hotan sat in the Lobby. I know that voice, I know who he is, I am sure of it. This has to be some kind of joke. “Send him in!” Works a lot, I see why he says that now.

“Ye-Yes sir.” She swallowed down the mistake she had made and turned to him. “So sorry for the misunderstanding, it’s my job to ensure he is not disturbed. You may see him now. Please, forgive me.”

“Understandable.” Flinging his book bag over his shoulder, he paused at the receptionist desk before entering the hallway. “No hard feelings. You were just doing your job and respect that.” This makes life more interesting if it really is him.

She remained silent as he walked down the hall. Apparently, the chief had gone back into his office instead of waiting on him. Hotan pushed on the large double doors that opened slowly and he entered the colossal office. Its décor was full of erotic artifacts and statues of all shapes and sizes. Swiftly he made his way across the room to where the desk sat with a wall of tinted glass behind it. The massive window’s tint dimly lit the office. Staring at the back of the king-sized chair, he anticipated if his guess was right.

It has to be him. The place, the setup. It all screams-

“Sorry about the Bulldog. She gets in her power trip and has a hard time getting back out.” The chair spun around playfully, Jacob’s bright eyes and goofy grin were unmistakable.

“No way, you’re Mr. Kendall, Chief Kendall?” Hotan sat down in the chair provided for him, gawking at the chief in disbelief. “Why didn’t you tell me? I, I can’t believe you’re the police chief!”

“I did tell you. I said I was a simple business man, and that I am, Hootie.” Jacob laughed, “What’s so hard to believe? You didn’t think I was the type? Come on! Got to give a guy more credit than that.”

“Whatever.” Pulling the file from his book bag, he dropped it on the desk. “From Principal Piedmont.”

“Yea I know.” Jacob flipped through the pages in the file for a few seconds, occasionally whistling. “Not bad, not bad, you make some good grades, clean record. You’re just a regular bookworm, eh? Makes my job easier in that case.”

“Is that my file?” Hotan grabbed it from Jacob and frantically started flipping through the pages. “What the hell? Why do you want this? And how did you convince the Principal to give it to you in the first place?”

“Well, the new issue is that you are aware of your abilities and started to use a few. You’ve established your immortal age, or at least triggered the transition. Then again I can’t promise you even that, but still we have to start cleaning up some of your paper trail and get rid of it.” He took a moment to guzzle down some coffee, “I’ve been doing this for everyone whose awakened. In today’s time, we have to be a lot more cautious unlike in the past.”

“Immortal age?” Leaning back in the chair, Hotan was intrigued at the opportunity to learn more about his situation. “What exactly are you trying to say? That I’ll forever look eighteen.”

“We have a winner! Unfortunately, there is a chance you will be eighteen forever, buddy.” Jacob leaned back into his chair. “Yea, so, that explains why we’re all different ages, such as Talib and myself. We find its just best to dispose of as much documentation as possible so to limit complications later on in life. Another thing is usually when someone hits this point they start remembering who they are, but, well, as we know you’re the exception.”

“Yea, and it’s not going to be easy to keep it from Talib is it? I’m sure he’s already questioning the fact. He doesn’t seem like a dumb guy, or one to miss a detail like this.” They exchanged a solid look with one another.

“I don’t know. I’m having a hard time keeping it under wraps. In fact, I can’t figure out whether he knows already. He’s a very intelligent guy considering he’s the only one who was awake to witness the changes in society and the world. And, you’re not the first awakened immortal he has dealt with. He has to suspect something. It may be why he’s acting out of the normal.” Jacob stared down at his cup of coffee as the conversation began to fall deeper into the subject. “You spend that much time on this earth, I am sure everything becomes routine. He seems to run short for answers on you and keeps his distance. I can’t figure out if there’s a brotherly history coming into play either. In the end, he is acting strange, and well, you’re all that we have as a Rebirth element.”

“About that, does he ever talk about that time? I mean, considering his abilities and the fact he was to live out his life alone must have taken its toll on him?” Hotan watched as Jacob swirled his cup, both thinking about how lonely it must have been. I know what it feels like to be alone, but to that degree, I feel ashamed to compare myself to it.

“He never speaks to me about it, not in great detail anyhow. All I know is that since we’ve started awakening he seems to be more at ease. Granted very concerned with it, I’m sure it’s a nerve-racking situation for him. Talib was to ensure this could not happen; yet he’s had no ability to instill the judgment to not remember or stop the process. Plus, it doesn’t help that Geliah’s stirring up things at the moment. The bastard has an incredible ability to locate the unawakened. Fortunately, there’s only a few left without the knowledge of their existence and he’s preoccupied since he found what he was looking for.”

“Me, right?” Hotan shifted in the chair, feeling uneasy under the weight of facts at hand. “Geliah’s been searching for Hotan. He seems pissed about being mortal for so long.”

“Right,” Jacob sighed putting his coffee down and stretching his arms out. “But no worries, T-Man will figure out things. Or, at least make sure you know all that you can about the whole situation. It’s not easy news to break; we all know how it felt. Then again, once we all remembered who we were there wasn’t anything to explain. With you though, we have to explain what we do on an instinctual level. It’s not easy to put to words.”

“Yea, well, at least this has been a great help.” Pulling the Book of Ancients from his book bag, he slid it over to Jacob. “Not sure if you know about this book. It was sort of a farewell gift.”

“What’s this?” Jacob picked up the book and began to flip through it, his eyes wide in amazement. “Where the hell did you get this? This, this can’t be right. It doesn’t add up with everything else I know.”

“Let’s just say it was his parting gift. I got to meet the cause of this matter in a very short dream session, like I hinted to you last night.” He leaned back taking a slow and heavy breath. “At first I thought I was going crazy. Just going around looking for something from a dream, but in the end, I found it.”

“Really? So, he wasn’t completely gone, but obviously you’re a completely different person. Oh my god, I.” Leaning back in his chair, Jacob scanned through the pages of the book. “I had no idea this existed. Everything in here is exact. We’re all here.”

“I found it in the little book store across from Benny’s Place. Tina had it.” The shock on Jacob’s face spoke volumes as he paused to read random excerpts in various chapters. So it is an accurate record of who they started as.

“Really? The element of insanity was keeping this secret from the rest of us. That woman can spin your questions into circles…” Frantic now, he flipped faster through the book before stopping abruptly. The color drained from his face and his jaw muscles twitched. “I can’t believe it. It can’t be possible. I don’t understand why or how I. What on earth was going on all these years while we were sleeping. This can’t be right. It’s not right at all.”

“What? What’s wrong Jake?” The room went cold, chills slithered across Hotan’s skin as the fear in Jacob’s eyes caught his own.

“Do you realize who wrote this book?!” Jake slid the book across the table with the pages open to where the author’s signature laid elegantly across a back page. “Did you even look for the author of this thing?”

“You’ve got to be kidding. Dated in 1403.” Trembling Hotan stared at the signature. He was reading something that should have never existed. “We were all deep in the spell at that time, weren’t we? That. He wasn’t.”

“Yea, we were, I thought. The first one to awake was in the 1750’s and she kept herself silent and hidden for some time. I-It’s hard to imagine that this document exists, it’s hard to swallow. It leaves me questioning what was truly happening.” Jake picked the book back up. “It’s amazing though. He took such care in knowing who each of us were, both before and during the immortality. My only theory is that Hotan was indeed awake, but I must ask myself if Talib knew this. I don’t think he knows to be honest. In addition, to consider the fact that Hotan wrote this himself in that time period. What the hell was going on? What would prompt him to log this information and then go as far as making sure you get it? He knew he was leaving this world at some point starting in the 1400’s!”

“My only guess is something went wrong, horribly wrong. What, I don’t know, and he sure in hell didn’t say much. Although this book gives me a very clear answer that it was a definite event in time and that what we are is real. It still leaves me questioning what happened and if Talib is aware of this.” Leaning his elbows on the desk, Hotan continued his speculations, “He definitely knew he was going to disappear. 1403 is a mostly quiet time in history. It is after one of the biggest black plague hits and other than a few Crusades after that point, it seems like a good time for a runaway to buckle down in a hideout and write something. Even then, I still question if Talib has known all this time.”

“You and me both, kid. I’m glad you showed this to me, because as you see, I have my own research in this whole matter. Not to say Talib’s untrustworthy, but he loves leaving a lot unsaid. I definitely think there’s more to this story than what meets the eye. For now, I’ll let you continue to hold on to the book. When you’re done with it, let me know.” Jake rubbed the side of his face trying to push the tension from his cheeks.

“You may have to acquire it from Tina since she made it clear to return it to her.” He placed it back into his book bag as he gave Jacob a sheepish smirk. “If that’s ok?”

“Not a problem. Well, let’s call it a day. Let me walk you out and get you a pass for anytime you want to come by. I have a feeling you’ll be visiting a lot.” They both jerked out of their seats, eager to leave the subject behind.

“Yea, it’s too little of information to make any conclusions from.” He followed Jake out the door and into the elevator. “Thanks for the help by the way.”

“It’s my job, don’t worry about it. Thank you for being so straight forward.” Jake smiled, desperate to throw a sensation of comfort into the air as the elevator came to a stop. “I just wish I could help you. Had some answers, or clues even.”

“I appreciate the thought at least.” They stopped at the main counter. “I’ll probably stop by when I come through this way. Especially, since I can find you a lot easier than Talib.”

“Yea, either here or Annie’s place.” He handed him an ID badge. “Don’t lose it or the security manager will blitz out. Security issues, bah!”

“Thanks,” They walked out the front of the building making their way to the parking garage. “I still have a hard time with this whole situation in general.”

“I don’t blame you. If it weren’t for the memories that came flooding back, I would be uneasy as hell about it. Honestly, I still have the small feeling of not wanting to accept the whole scenario.” Jake jolted to a stop as they approached Hotan’s motorcycle. “Shit.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Hotan’s bike was lying on its side, tires slashed and the whole thing looked like it had been dragged through a mud hole. “I just can’t catch a break anymore.”

“Good evening, boys!.” An all-black motorcycle came rushing to a stop between them and the bike. “Geliah sends his regards!”

Laughter poured from the helmeted woman on the bike as she peeled away. The screeching of the back tire was deafening within the parking garage. They both cringed and turned their focus back to the dirt-covered motorcycle that lay on the concrete floor of the parking garage.

“Dammit.” It was all Jacob could mutter as they came closer to the devastated motorcycle. “I hate her with a passion.”

“I can’t believe this.” Crouching down, Hotan assessed the damage on his only form of transportation. Worse off, it was the last item of value that he owned. “That’s strange, there’s mud everywhere. It’s like someone put potting soil in every nook and cranny. The fuel tank is full of the stuff!”

“Looks like Cassandra’s work.” Jake shook his head. “Sorry buddy, looks like Geliah’s girl got you good on this one.”

“Who?” He looked over at him. “Cassandra?”

“Yeah, take a closer look at the damage there. Since when do slashed tires leave dirt? In fact, I guarantee the engine’s full of it too.” Jake started digging into his pockets, keys and coins jingling. “Cassandra’s with Geliah, or should I simply say his girlfriend, partner, bed buddies, which ever you prefer. Unfortunately, she’s the element of earth and she can be somewhat of a nuisance, a real challenge to deal with since we’re non-elementals.”

“Great. You think she’s been spying on me?” Hotan walked over to where his helmet laid on the asphalt, wiping dirt from it.

“Wouldn’t surprise me,” Jake lit up a cigarette then grabbed out his keys. “My truck is around the corner. I’ll drive around and we’ll load your bike up. I know someone who can fix it.”

“Uh, I don’t really have the money for that kind of repairs.” Leaning against the parking garage wall, Hotan felt as if he had hit a dead end. “And I don’t think anyone has the skill to remove dirt from every inch of an entire motor.”

“No worries. I’ll pay for it. I can get work done there without a problem. Damn good mechanic too.” Jake puffed on his cigarette, huffed out the smoke and began walking around the corner. “I know they can fix this, trust me on that. They are always looking for a challenge, heh.”

Staring down at the mess at this feet Hotan managed to mumble, “Thanks again.”

Chapter Fifteen

After a few minutes, a large silver quad cab pickup drove up and backed up towards the bike that lay in ruins. Jake climbed out of the vehicle, placed the half-smoked cigarette in his mouth. With a 1-2-3 the two of them lifted the motorcycle into the bed of the truck, slamming the tailgate closed. Hotan climbed in, sliding into the nice leather seats and the cool air conditioning hit his face. Jake turned up the radio as he continued to finish the last of his cigarette. Both of them sat in silence pondering over the details of everything they had discussed.

Now I have a new threat: Cassandra. Someone I have no idea what she looks like or even the extent of what she is capable of doing. Would she go as far as going after someone close to me? Annie? Shellie? Kyle? Every corner I turn seems to make matters worse. I am desperately trying to deal with everyday life situations, but I am overloading on the abnormal stuff like land mines in a sidewalk. It is getting worse with every piece I learn. Every time I manage to get a new piece of the puzzle something else much more dangerous rears its ugly head. Cerberus himself had crawled out from hell to chase me down to join the others who were drowning in the Lake of Fire.

Shellie. I haven’t talked to her in a while, like we used to before all of this. The guilt is starting to get to me. She’s left me alone to deal with it all, like I asked. No harassing phone calls, just a simple yes or no question on it, nothing more. She disappeared quietly, giving me space and time to deal with whatever had interrupted our life together. It’s one of the reasons why I like her so much; she doesn’t need me to be there every day to know that we are a couple. We have a mutual and mature relationship, unlike the ones I watch go on at school. We accept the fact that we both need our space and time apart. School and jobs take up much of our free time, but it makes our moments together a lot more special.

I should call her, check up on her.

“Check up on who? You’re girl?” Jake flicked his cigarette out the window and rolled it up. “Shellie?”

“Uh, yeah,” Sighing, Hotan still hadn’t mastered keeping his thoughts from being heard. “You heard that, huh?”

“Yea, you’re not as loud as when you first started out over dinner, but still there for anyone to chime in.” Jake gave him a smirk. “So! How is your girlfriend?”

“Ok I guess.” Shrugging he looked out the window watching the telephone poles zoom by. “Haven’t really been talking to her lately.”

“You guess? When was the last time you even spoke to her Hootie?” The smile faded as Jake glanced over at him. “Oh man, you need to call her or something more at the rate you’re going. Life without love is just, sad.”

“I think it’s been a month, I think. At least that long since I last spoke to her normally anyhow.” His guilt started to weigh him down even further. “I feel horrible about it.”

“Holy Cow! Are you sure you’re even together anymore?” Jake gave him a distraught look hearing the news, “Teenage girls don’t take these things lightly you know? Are you sure you’re still boyfriend and girlfriend? That’s far too long.”

“Yea, we’re together.” Hotan was feeling the pressure, “I feel bad about it. She knows if she needs anything to call me, but with all this stuff going on it’s been hard. I don’t even know who I am anymore, or if I am still supposed to be someone else. The idea of dragging her through this bothers the hell out of me.”

“Well, that’s understandable.” Jake turned down a more rural area of town. “But don’t you think you could really use her right about now. At least she’s the solid point in your life. Sounds like you two really respect and care a lot about each other.”

“Yea, I guess you have a good point.” Industrial-type buildings pass by on the desolate weatherworn road. “Where are we going?”

“Not too much further. The shop’s at the end of this road, just around the turn up ahead.” Once more, he gave his smug look.

“Gotcha.” Hotan gazed out of the window in silence, reluctant to let his thoughts wonder like normal.

They pulled up to an old small aircraft hangar turned mechanic shop. Directly behind it was a fenced-in junkyard, a resource for those missing and hard-to-find parts. A sign read ‘Lilly Pad’s Junkyard & Repairs’ as it swung in the breeze creaking. As the truck came to a stop and dust floated by, Hotan noticed there were no signs of anyone or if it was even open for business. Watching Jake get out of the truck, Hotan followed him with his eyes as he walked towards the open garage. After a minute or so he walked back up to the truck opening the passenger side, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Looks like I’m going to need your help.” Jake laughed nervously, “I can’t see anyone anywhere.”

Hotan blinked, “Help?”

“Yea, we’re going to have to search the junkyard for our beloved mechanic. Probably working on a side project again.” He sighed leading him around the back of the shop where a gate hung loosely on its hinges.

The unlocked padlock hung lazily on the fence.

“So who am I looking for?” Hotan gawked at the stacks of cars baring signs of being stripped or completely totaled from their accidents. The injuries on the metal beasts were each unique and equally gut wrenching. “And how am I going to see them out in this?”

“The only other person out here, besides us.” Jake walked pass him and headed towards the right.

Hotan headed to the left, hoping he’ll manage to make his way out again in the maze of twisted cars. There were cars of all sorts of shapes, sizes and conditions. Some old, some new, and occasionally one or two unrecognizable pieces. He traveled down the winding hallways of the morbid labyrinth that occasionally creaked or tinged as a gust of wind would blow by. It was creepy seeing all these vehicles, leaving questions in one’s mind if the passengers they once held survived. The damage was severe and horrific knowing that it once was a safe place for someone to sit.

A rearview mirror came crashing to the ground beside him from a car above him. He backed up and gazed at where it came from to find a black cat stalking about. After their exchanged glares, it flicked an ear and moved on.

Jake brought up a very good point. I do need Shellie. She is the only thing that is definite and unchanging in my life. She is my strong point at the moment and I neglected ensuring it stayed that way. I hope she isn’t upset with me. I needed to be with her, but my new worry is if Cassandra or Geliah would harm her. At this point and time they have trashed my bike, but who knows what else they would be willing to do. Cassandra is the element of earth and the things she could do with that is unlimited. She could literally bury me ali-

A muffler came smashing down in front of him. He stumbled and fell backwards, landing hard on the muddy ground. “Holy shit!”

“Eh?” A voice came from far atop of the cars. “Who the hell are you?”

“I-” Hotan choked on his words as his heart pounded in his throat. He managed to start again. “Who are you?!”

“The property owner! That’s all you need to know!” Steps could be heard coming across one of the cars above him. “Now tell me who you are and why the hell you’re trespassing!”

“My name’s Hotan and I came here with Jake.” He stood up brushing himself off.

“Jake? Jake Kendall? As in the Jake Kendall that owes me money Jake Kendall?” The voice chirped in disbelief like a bird in a tree.

“Yea, Jake Kendall.” Hotan ogled up at the towering giant made of cars, shading his eyes from the gleaming sun in order to make out the person that was speaking to him. “I didn’t know he owed you money.”

“Yea, well it’s pointless with him. He thinks the world owes him everything and he owes nothing to the world!” They laughed squatting down, still making it hard to make out who they were from where the sun glared brilliantly behind them.

“Yea-yea, you can say that all you want!” Jake walked up behind him patting Hotan’s back. Scoffing, Jacob kicked the rusted muffler that had been tossed down into Hotan’s path. “Were you trying to kill the boy?”

“No, just stripping a car for parts, he happened to be in the way, that’s all.” They huffed, standing back up.

“I’m ok, it was no big-” Hotan’s heart dropped when the person above them leaped off from what seemed to be a good 25-foot drop. They managed to land without any complications with a fa-thud sound, squatting on the ground in front of them. “No way in hell.”

“Feh!” The broad shouldered girl stood up straight wiping her heavy leather gloves off on each other and moved on to brush her overalls off with her muscular arms. “That’s nothing. I’ve hopped down several stories before. It takes practice, but we’re capable of a lot.”

“Looking beautiful as ever M’ Lady,” Jake grinned as she adjusted her bandana that covered her coarse hair pinned back in its ponytail. She twisted her grease-smudged face at him, “C’mon now, can’t you pretend to be happy to see me?”

“Depends if you’re here to pay me the two hundred bucks you owe me.” She snorted brushing pass them, working her way through the skyscrapers of junk cars.

“Sure, I’ll pay you today, doll face!” Jake raced up beside her pulling out his wallet and handing over the money without further delay. “But I need another favor.”

“What is it now?” She shoved the money into her pocket as she looked over at him nonchalantly. “Nitro? Lift kit? What project you got going and on which of your toys?”

“No, nothing like that babe, this is for Hotan.” She paused and glanced back at him with a ghostly complexion. “He’s in a tight spot at the moment.”

“You’re, did you just say Hotan was your name?” Her eyes vehemently glared at him picking apart his every feature. “You may look like him, no, something.”

“Yea,” Hotan returned her glare with a more questionable one. “And you are?”

“Lilly, but you’re Hotan. You look like Hotan, but you sure don’t act like him.” She walked up to him examining him further fighting the idea that he was who he claimed to be. “And for you not to know who I am is even stranger. I can feel it’s there, but it’s different. You’re not the Hotan I know. That is without a doubt. You are completely different. Fresh even.”

Hotan watched her eyes scan him as she circled him once, finishing with her leaning close to him exchanging a forceful eye-to-eye contact. “You’re him, but,” Lilly finally stepped back and turned to Jake with a concerned soft voice. “What the hell is happening Jake? What kind of trouble is this?”

“Oh, I don’t know what you’re talking about, Lilly Pad.” Jake shrugged and gave her his best smug look.

“Stop playing games, I know there’s something up. Hell, this isn’t Hotan.” She walked to Jake and started stabbing him in the chest with a finger. “In fact, this is a kid with the same abilities if not stronger! What in the hell are you and Talib going to do about this, Jacob?”

“Uh,” Jake leered at her as she gave him a stare down, arms crossed and her eyes sharp as they sliced through his act. “Oh come on, Lilly. I really don’t think this is the best time or place for such a talk.”

“Now is better than never, spit it out, I don’t care.” She huffed as she tapped her biker boot impatiently on the ground, squeezing the answer from him with her gaze. “I refuse to do anything till you give me some sort of explanation of what’s going on. I mean, obviously this has been developing for some time but dammit. I need to know what we’ve gotten ourselves into.”

“Tell her Jake.” Hotan broke his silent watch over the argument and fell under her glare as she looked back at him. “Or should I try to explain it?”

“Why couldn’t you just stay quiet?” Jake mumbled in frustration, rubbing the back of his neck. “If you think you can tell her then go ahead, Big Boy. We still really don’t know. Honest.”

“Yea, let me hear this from you.” She placed her hands on her hip letting her aggressive approach fade to a lower level. “I’m sure you’re the one suffering the most out of this ordeal. You’re an infant in this mess.”

“Heh,” Hotan took in a deep breath trying to give himself a moment to know where to begin. “Well, as you already figured out, no I am not the same Hotan. I am a complete duplicate or remake. Still not quite sure what the purpose was in it but at the same time I haven’t a clue what I can do. I don’t get the luxury of remembering how to use these so-called powers.”

“Is that all you know?” She lifted an eyebrow, turning back to Jake who nodded in agreement. C’mon Jacob, what’s really going on? Talib must know something, right?

“Hey, it’s rude to whisper like that.” Jake started to walk further out of the junkyard in hopes of cutting her investigation short. “He’s not completely void of abilities. He has at least that much going for him.”

I can do it but not very good at controlling it. Hotan shrugged as she glanced back at him with an amused look on her face. “But there’s a lot we don’t know about what’s going on. I’m still trying to deal with the idea that we exist, let alone that I’m one of you. On top of it all, I keep getting the impression this whole mess is Hotan’s fault, which ripples down to its all my fault.”

“No kidding.” Sighing, Lilly led them back through the decrepit gate. “I’m just curious of why he did this. He was so determined on the matter of making us disappear it just doesn’t feel right.”

“Well, Lilly Pad, if you happen to find that answer you be sure to call the rest of us.” Jake scoffed as they stopped by his truck and he lit up another cigarette, taking a long deep drag from it. “What’s got me twisted is the idea of Talib being awake for it all. Why did he let it happen? I know he knows, but the man hasn’t said anything. Not one hint of how he feels or even a reaction to it all.”

“Especially if you can pick up on the fact I’m not who I appear to be so easily.” Hotan sighed as he leaned over the bed of the truck, scrutinizing his trashed Suzuki. “But I don’t think Geliah gives a rat’s ass whether I am the Old Hotan or not.”

“Geliah? That ass needs to grow up.” Lilly walked up beside him and peered over the side of the truck curious of why he looked so remorseful. “You’ve got to be kidding.”

“Yea I know, the bike’s pretty rough.” Jake commented with the cigarette hanging lazily in his mouth. “She’s a dirty one, neh?”

“Cassandra’s head is full of dirt, if you ask me. Especially for being so wrapped up into Geliah of all people. How about you two manly men carry it in the shop?” She walked into the garage disappearing from their view.

“Damn it’s heavy.” Jake growled through his cigarette as they laid the bike on the ground just behind the truck.

“Yea, full tank of gas, well, mud.” The two of them pushed the bike towards the shop with its flat tires dragging the whole way there, leaving a distinct trail of dirt. “It’s going to be a while before I get this thing back. You think you can give me a lift home when we get ready to leave?”

“Sure, if you really think you need a ride.” They stopped inside the garage lined with its shelves, drawers and various tools and equipment. A heavy smell of oil, gasoline and mechanic related scents greeted their nostrils.

“Considering I have dirt encasing the inside of my engine, yea, I need a ride Jake.” Hotan leaned against a table as he watched Jake take one last drag from the cigarette and flick it out the open garage door.

“You don’t need to ride with anyone.” Lilly came out of the office enclosure near them, gloves off and her face clean. She tossed Jake a beer, opening her own against her arm like he had seen many guys at the bars do. “This should be an easy fix, but it’s going to drain the hell out of me, fair warning.”

“There’s no way you can take this engine apart and fix it by the end of today.” Hotan looked skeptical of what she was implying as she guzzled down half of her beer.

“Who said anything about taking it apart?” She gave a smirk, winking in his direction. “Now close the garage door. Let’s get this over and done with.”

“You sure you want to do it that way, girlie?” Jake found a chair to sit on as he enjoyed the cold liquid pouring down his throat. “I know it’s still hard on you.”

“Practice makes perfect.” She threw the empty bottle in a nearby trashcan, making a loud clanking sound as it hit others in its fall. “It’s getting better though.”

“Are you-” Hotan looked at her as the garage fell into darkness. The chain-operated gate came screeching into its resting place and the room was lit from a few flickering florescent lights. “Are you going to do what I think you’re about to do?”

“If you knew how to use your powers it would have been an easy fix.” Jake looked back at him smiling. “But she’s going to try and push the dirt out by crushing the metal into a solid chunk leaving the dirt to fall to the garage floor.”

“Yea, it may take me a while to do it, but it can be done.” She cracked her knuckles and neck taking a steadying deep breath.

“Wait,” Standing next to Jake, Hotan was unsure of where else he would be allowed to be during this delicate procedure. “But my bike’s not completely metal. I mean I know half the materials are plastic or rubber, so, how is this going to work?”

“Well, see that’s the intriguing thing.” Jake leaned back taking a sip of his beer. “We’re a lot more complex than where we started at all those centuries ago. Lilly of Metals has evolved in a most peculiar way despite being in that Rip Van Winkle naps of yours. Her element has changed to match the times.”

“Yup, not everyone adjusted or changed. It just depends on the element.” She was digging through a rather large toolbox full of various shelves. “It’s really interesting you know, took me by surprise.”

“So, what you’re trying to say is that some of, us, have become stronger, despite the lack of use of our so called elements?” Hotan was trying to comprehend the new information he was given. “Adapted by default?”

“Exactly,” She walked over to his grim-looking bike and started to wrench off the cover pieces, making the bike lose its smooth appearance piece-by-piece. “So my abilities have gotten stronger, more advanced.”

“And how did your powers become stronger?” Sadly, Hotan watched as his motorcycle became a bare skeleton, showing nothing but the ragged insides that endured a hellish blow. “Because I really don’t see how metal could advance into something stronger.”

“Well, let’s break the idea of our powers down.” She placed another cover piece gently on the table and walked back to the vehicle to continue the task at hand. “Keep in mind that overall, we are truly reflections of emotions or materials that make up a person and their life. I mean, there’s emotions like lust or love that everyone yearns for and gives, and you have fear that we all feel. Besides that, you also have the basis of life itself, mind or spirit. Further from that you have the environment that helps create that life. The earth we walk on, light that lets us see and fire to gives us warmth. It’s what helps mold humanity.”

“In short, little Miss Can’t-be-wrong is saying that metal has expanded into everyday life and is related to machinery more often than the element. Due to that fact alone, she has expanded her ability. Once it was able to control the simple objects of metals and could make a knight’s armor and weapons. It now includes more complex items, such as guns, cars and any other machinery she can possibly imagine.” Jake proudly took a swallow of his beer as they continued to educate him on this new finding. “It was something we didn’t realize would be part of the package until recently. I’m convinced if she keeps at it, she may be able to do some high tech computer stuff.”

“Machines aren’t one hundred percent metal. I am able to manipulate plastics, rubber, and any other materials depending on what it is I am building.” She clomped her tools back onto a shelf and squatted in front of the bike evaluating the damage that had been done.

“Huh, that is interesting, but it makes sense now that you put it that way. I didn’t realize that society had such a big effect on us though. It’s ironic.”

“Yea, it’s a pain in the ass if you ask me.” Jake sighed leaning forward again, resting his elbows on his legs. “There’s so much to adjust and learn, but we’re still human when it’s all said and done. We just feel the flow of everyday life a million times more than the average person, and unlike them, we have the ability of manipulating the element of our choice.”

Huffing, Hotan crossed his arms, “Of your choice.”

“You heard right.” Lilly smiled at him but it faded as she released a heavy sigh. “But in your case, you have no choice.”

“Yea, and that just doesn’t add up either.” Jake looked up at him for a moment. “Anyway, let’s get this show on the road, doll.”

“Like I said, it may take a while.” She took in a deep breath as she took a step closer to the project that lay before her.

Hotan watched Lilly as she stood there for several minutes, almost as if nervous or reluctant about the idea of performing the ability. She had spoken so proudly of it just minutes before. Taking several deep breaths and holding her hands out towards the bike, her face solid with focus. She gave her full attention to the motorcycle in its naked shape. Hotan’s eyes widened as a bluish glow from the motorcycle broke his fixation on her. It seemed to grow from the very center of the bike and within moments the sound of metal and various objects bending and breaking. It was painful for him to think of what was happening to the bike he had worked so hard to earn. The squeaking and groaning started to creep out, louder and more frequent.

I wish things could be normal again.

Turning his focus back to Lilly, Hotan could see black marks crawling out across her face and arms as sweat ran down the side of her cheek. Soon the bluish glow was starting to surround her as she continued her work. Now he could actually see parts and elements starting to implode into a mass that made up the heart of the bike. Dirt and mud was beginning to rain to the floor, as it found no place to hide or contain itself. Truly an amazing event to witness, he looked down at Jake who was leaning back in his seat. Chugging his beer, Jake’s grave expression told Hotan volumes.

He’s worried about this. Obviously, this is still a hard task on everybody. Getting accustomed to their new, weaker selves has taken a huge toll on them. Maybe it is a good thing I am starting from scratch.

The disintegration of his bike continued as if it were a piece of paper, slowly and torturously crumbling. It took several minutes before what used to be a working piece of machinery was merely a glowing blue ball of metal and various materials. Below the floating mass was an increasing pile of moist dirt. The mass began to bubble, stretch itself awkwardly. Lilly maintained her composure that she had begun with. More sweat had collected on her face and arms.

He could see she was making a hollow metal case that imitated what the bike had looked like. It was an extremely slow process, but with so much detail it was to be expected. Each component surfaced with every detail clear and defined as if it were brand new. It was absolutely breathe taking as Hotan watched his bike reappear from the deteriorated mass with grace within that blue glow. Upon completion, as the tires filled themselves with air as they delicately touched the ground. The tread appeared like script across a page, like the tires had never touched asphalt. It gently landed back onto the garage floor and the glow started to fade.

Lilly fell to the floor.

Chapter Sixteen

He and Jake scrambled to where she had fallen. She was cold and clammy as Jake picked her up. Hotan followed close behind him as he busted into the office laying her on the couch.

“Get something warm, a towel, rag, anything you can find!” Jake rubbed her face softly saying her name trying to wake her up, tears filling his eyes. “Lilly, Lilly honey, snap out of it. You stubborn woman, you just had to push yourself too far once more. Please, Lilly, wake up!”

“What the hell just happened?” Hotan rushed into the bathroom that was in view, grabbing up the hand towel and impatiently waited for the sink water to get hot. “Is she ok?”

“It happens to all of us when we do more than what we’re used to, now hurry!” Jake pulled the blanket that lay across the top of the couch off and wrapped her in it, unable to get her to wake up. “We might be able to snap her back out if we can warm her up.”

“Why did she even do it then?” Rushing back with the warm hand towel, Hotan caught sight of a tear sliding down Jake’s cheek. This is bad, real bad. “I had no idea it was this extreme.”

“She’s stubborn.” Jake snatched it from him and began rubbing her face with it, slowly returning color to her face as he did so. “She hates being like this so she tends to rush it. She’s been pushing her body to regain the stamina needed to handle the element. Stupid Lilly, why did you have to do this to me today, Honey?”

“Rush it? Hell, she’s trying to kill herself.” Hotan flopped into an old computer chair trying to understand the situation that had unfolded. “This happens to you all? This is insane.” How horrible.

“Yea, at first, that is, until we get used to it again. Talib is the only one that doesn’t have this problem.” Jake gave a sigh as Lilly started to moan and shifted in her spot. “In fact you’ve fallen into a similar state in the cathedral. Temporary memory loss, chills, cold, so very cold, and even comas happen sometimes.”

“Really?” He watched as Jake continued to dab her with the hand towel helping her snap out of her unconscious state. “I guess that explains how I woke up and how it relates to the church’s new makeover.”

“Shit,” She mumbled grabbing her head. “That hurt. Ugh, I hate when I over do it.”

“Well, good morning beautiful!” Jake exclaimed in great relief. Even in Hotan’s colorblind eyes, he could see color return to Jake’s face. “Was wondering how long you were going to sleep on the job.”

“Sorry if I scared you guys.” She stiffly sat up rubbing her forehead. “Ugh, can you grab my Tylenol in the medicine cabinet?”

“Sure,” Hotan retrieved them, “Here you go.”

“Gave us quite the startle when you didn’t wake up at first!” Jake had taken Hotan’s seat as they watched her swallow the pills with no need for water.

“Yea, I wasn’t quite expecting it.” Hotan crossed his arms still feeling uneasy from the intense moment. “Why did you do it if it takes that much energy from you? That’s pushing your luck, don’t you think?”

“Heh, every time I push myself a few levels higher the next time I do something that big I don’t quite pass out. As they say kid, practice makes perfect.” She shoved the blanket off and stood up wobbling. “I like pushing my luck, if that’s what you want to call it.”

“Yea, and she isn’t the only one half the time. Most of us made the big mistake of trying something big once we remembered who we were. Woke up in the ER on IV for shock, malnourishment, or whatever other reason the doctors thought fit the cause of the sudden fainting session.” Jake watched Lilly head to the kitchen opening her fridge as she leaned heavily on the door for support, still feeling weak. “It’s just really hard gauging what we are able to handle and not handle and how bad the outcome will be.”

“I was thinking about that earlier.” Hotan couldn’t help but observe Jake’s depressed and frustrated look. “I can almost say I’m lucky to be starting from scratch.”

“Anyone want a beer?” Lilly poked her head above the fridge door to see both of them raise a finger or two. “Alright, I can see that point, but, in the end you’re facing as much if not more emotional trauma than the rest of us.”

“Yea, she’s got a point.” Jake took a beer from her as she returned to the couch. She smirked and winked as she handed Hotan a coke bottle. “I really think he’s got more to worry about than us.”

“You’re telling me.” Hotan huffed enjoying the chilly liquid that flowed across his dry throat. “I have a lot on my plate. I have to figure out who and what I am, then it’s my fault because this mess surfaced up like it did. The only guy who can explain the whole reason why, doesn’t exist anymore. On top of all that, I have some other guy who wants me dead over the whole thing.”

“Damn, your life sucks,” Lilly guzzled down her drink. “Must be hard being famous like that.”

“Oh Lilly Pad go easy on the kid.” Jake looked up at him. “Don’t let her intimidate you. Her bark’s worse than her bite, trust me I know from experience.”

“Feh,” Hotan grinned to himself admiring her spirit. “I’m used to it by now. I’ll finish putting the covers on the bike while you two catch up.”

“About time you did something around here.” Lilly watched as he walked out of the office.

Walking over to the open drawer, Hotan picked up the required tool. Next to the body panels, Lilly had laid the nuts and screws in plain sight. He picked up one panel and shoved the screws in his pocket. One piece at a time, he started to attach the outside jacket that gave the bike its smooth aggressive look. As he wrenched away he admired the shiny chrome look that made up a majority of the bikes metal components. As he went, he noted that some things weren’t entirely in the spot they were before and he could tell that some new parts were in place. He hastened his wrenching on the panels, eager to ask Lilly what she had done to his motorcycle before he dare try to ride it all the way home. Home was an hour drive, if not more, from where they were.

After several minutes he finished, wiping the sweat from his forehead. Walking back into the office, they noticeably cut their conversation short. He had received more information than what he knew what to do with for the time being.

“What exactly did you do to my bike?” Hotan gave Lilly a strong glare as she sat on the couch leaning on her knees, a fresh beer in hand. “You did more than I thought. It’s not the same. Just looks the same.”

“Wow, you actually noticed.” She smiled widely as her eyes lit up. “I modified the engine to maximize your output and changed the metal entirely to Titanium. There’s a lot more than that but I think you know where I am going on that note.”

“Well the question is, am I going to kill myself trying to drive it home?” He leaned against the door frame as he waited for the answer. More speed isn’t always the best.

“Nope, but you’ll notice it’ll shift a lot smoother and you’ll feel it’s got a lot more power behind it.” She leaned back onto the couch giving a quick glance over at Jake who remained silent as his back faced Hotan. “Be careful, she may feel lighter than the steel parts that were on there. Take the turns easy.”

“Just be careful, Hotan.” Jake’s voice was deeper ant it gave him the tone of a father giving his son worldly advice. “And call your girl. Take a break from all of this.”

“Yea I know.” He sighed, “I’ll be off then. Thanks for everything, Lilly.”

“Anytime, kid.” She raised her bottle up at him. “Stop by anytime. I’ll do what I can for you.”

Hotan walked out to Jake’s truck to grab his helmet from the passenger side. It was starting to get dark outside as he put it on, flipping up the tinted shield, leaving the clear down for the drive back home. He pulled the chain to open the loud garage door, hooking the chain in place to ensure it wouldn’t come crashing back down. Sitting on his renewed motorcycle, he couldn’t help but be nervous about driving it so far for the first time. Not knowing how it would work or feel, he started the engine to hear it roar softer and smoother than what he was accustomed to. Kicking up the kickstand, his legs welcomed the lighter weight of the bike, but managed to make himself anxious over the difference.

Knowing that he would have to adjust shifting his weight, he’d have to be thoughtful on making his turns. Leaning a lot softer than before was going to be quite the change and challenge from the heavy beast he once road. He lightly pressed the gas and elegantly rolled out of the garage onto the isolated industrial road. As the bike shifted, he felt the effortlessness of the changing of the gears and the clean feeling of the ride.

What an amazing job Lilly!

Hotan made his way out of the dimly lit industrial section of town as the sun began to set and a few highway lamps began to flicker on. He shoved back the thoughts and information that had flooded itself onto him despite the etched images of the work Lilly had performed.

I have to go see Shellie. I hope she’s not pissed with me.

He made it to a familiar road that would put him on the expressway closer to home. Luckily, rush hour had ended hours ago. The ride was smooth despite the cold night air that hit his exposed arms and body through his thin shirt. He enjoyed how the ride was more relaxed and almost effortless with the redesign. The engine hummed softly as he made his way to the exit and taking caution as he made a right turn adjusting to the change. As he pulled up, there were no vehicles in Shellie’s driveway, but the living room light was on. The doorbell rang out behind the closed door.

Shellie has to be here.

After a few minutes he heard the clicking of the lock and the door cracked open cautiously. A smile of relief crept across his face.

“Hey,” Hotan could see she was indifferent about the sudden visit. “You ok?”

“Hey,” She gave him a smile as she opened the door wider letting him in. “Mom and Dad are at a business party and won’t be home till real late. What brings you here? Are you ok?”

“You.” Feeling the weight of his guilt ease off, his mood was improving. “I was thinking about you all day today. Feeling guilty about not calling like I used to, and not giving you a minute of my time in the last few weeks. Sorry, Shellie.”

“You know I don’t get mad about that kind of stuff. You’re dealing with a lot, and asked for some space to deal with it. I can’t blame you for at least being straight forward.” She hugged him taking in a deep breath of his scent, which she had grown to miss. “But I am glad to see you, much better than a phone call.”

“I know, but it still doesn’t give me the right to completely neglect you.” He lifted her chin up, staring deeply into her eyes.

I just wish I could see those eyes in color again.

“You shouldn’t worry so much, Hotan.” She brushed some of his hair behind his ear. “I’m a big girl.”

“Well then, forgive me. I completely forgot you were.” He leaned in and kissed her soft warm lips. Her lips were sweet tasting and the firm push they gave back to his sent his pulse running. Pulling her close and tight, he let his troubles melt away, embracing her warmth.

I am so sorry for going so long without you.

“Are you ok Hotan?” Her voice came out shaken as she nuzzled her head in his shoulder. “You’re acting weird. You’ve never been this loverly with me before.”

“I don’t know.” His sigh was heavy; sounding like it had been pressed into the ground by a great force. “I don’t know anymore. I just went too long without you and realized I wasn’t being fair to you. That I do need you more than I had thought. You’re the only thing I have that makes me still feel human.”

They didn’t say much to each other, as they snuggled on the couch pretending to pay attention to the movie that was flashing across the television. It was a joy being so close to her and not thinking of anything. He had seen Lilly’s amazing ability just hours before, but that didn’t matter. Miracles, immortals and their powers were no longer on his mind. He just wanted to swim in the warmth of Shellie’s heart and be himself, not the boy trying to fill the place of the abandoned leader of the immortal Levites. Just plain Hotan. Hotan, who goes to a high school, has a band and most importantly, has someone he loves and would do anything in the world to keep her there by his side safe.

Hotan… A familiar voice rang in his head.

Who is this? He responded straightening himself on the couch, annoyed that the moment with Shellie was breaking.

Talib. He took a deep breath as he sat there silently feeling the weight of his stress creeping back into him.

What do you want? Didn’t expect to be talking to you so soon again. He felt like holding his breath, hoping that his earlier thoughts were left unheard.

I just wanted to apologize for the other night. Talib’s voice was deep and heavy with sorrow. I, I am just not sure if now is a good time to add to the stress you are already under. With what Jacob and I had mentioned, I just felt it was not a good time to add to your shoulders just yet.

Understandable, Hotan leaned back into the couch staring at the ceiling, but it seems like recently I’m the one causing myself the most stress. We can start again if that helps.

How so? Talib’s pace had quickened revealing the unconditional concern he had for Hotan. What would you like me to do?

I’m not up for talking about it right now. He took a deep breath, holding back the millions of thoughts that had plagued his mind. Maybe another day I’ll be willing to share, but tonight’s not going so well. I am tired and frustrated. We can meet up later on.

You are not in some sort of trouble?

Nothing I can’t handle. Normal life kind of trouble, nothing in regards to the ‘my special abilities’ and what not. He closed his eyes kicking himself for the mess he had found himself in regarding the old Hotan and Cassandra’s attack. I’ll be fine. Just need some rest.

If you ever need me, There was a long pause from Talib before he finished, you can find me at the Cathedral.

“You ok?” Shellie was staring at him, observing his ever-growing tension consume the muscles in his face. “You look super tense? You feeling ok?”

“Uh,” Hotan looked over at her slightly startled. “Yea…”

“Relax.” She smiled and kissed him on the forehead. “It’s okay, Hotan. I’m not mad at you.”

“Hey, Shellie?” He grabbed her hand.

Furrowing her brow she looked him in the eyes, concern washing over her face, “Yea?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Her cheeks red, she grinned in her excitement. “But I still think you are acting weird.”

For the rest of the night he sat there on the couch with her, holding her close as they watched random movies.

I have tried so hard all this whole time to keep our relationship mutual and uncomplicated, but for what reason? For the first time I feel like our relationship is complete and more stable than ever before. The question is, does she truly feel the same?

He looked down at her, with her head resting against his chest. They sat in utter darkness with only the television giving off light. She looked sleepy and secure as she focused on the movie. He hugged her closer taking in a deep breath. There was the sound of two car doors shutting followed by the muffled sounds of chatter and laughter outside. Keys rattled and the sound of the door unlocking. Her parents came through the door in their formal attire from the evening’s event.

“Well! Look here, Doris!” Shellie’s father boasted, his cheeks red from alcohol and his mustache slanted across his face as he smirked. “We caught them in the act! Shame on them!”

“Oh, Henry!” Doris giggled delightful that her little girl hadn’t spent the whole night by herself. “Where have you been, Hotan? It seems ages since I saw you last.”

“Oh, just working a lot Mrs. Rubenstein.” They both straightened their posture. “Keeping busy with school, the band, grabbing up side jobs where I can.”

“You’re just saying that.” Henry gave him two hard smacks in the arm as they passed by. “But I like the sound of it!”

“Was everything ok, baby?” Doris kissed Shellie on the cheek, patting her on the head.

“Yea, Mom, Hotan showed up not too long ago, but everything is fine.” She stifled a yawn stretching out her arms. “Would it be ok if I stayed the night at Hotan’s?”

“Uh,” Hotan looked down at Shellie then back up to her parents, feeling his face turn.

What is she thinking? They would never let her stay the night at my place. A teenage girl, staying the night at a delinquent’s apartment, and she didn’t even ask me!

“Oh.” Her mother gave a clueless expression. “Henry, what do you think?”

“Hmm,” Her dad gave him the stare down and after a few minutes cracked a big smile. “Well Shellie’s a big girl and smart at that. I don’t see the harm in it. Just bring her back in one piece or else!”

My head is on the chopping block for sure now. “Uh, yes sir.” He shot a look at Shellie, baffled at the sudden suggestion.

She must have known they would say yes, but...

“You’ve got all day tomorrow to bring her home!” Her mother smiled sweetly.

“Thanks!” Shellie jumped up to hug both her parents. “I promise to be good! We have a lot to work on for the band. At least this way you don’t have to hear me practice in the morning!”

“Oh yes! A quiet morning will be needed after as much as I drank! I trust you’ll take good care of her tonight.” Henry shook his hand, crushing it with his bare paws to send the message well. “She’s the only daughter I have Hotan.”

“Yes sir, I know.” He returned the hand-crushing squeeze that all men exchange, a silent exchange of respect and strength. “Besides, we have to go to 7even’s early tomorrow for auditions.”

“Oh! What are you auditioning for?” Her mother’s face filled with interest.

“Well, we’re judging some people who are trying out for Shellie’s place in the band.” He sighed as he scratched the back of his head, still perplexed.

“I’m one year under the minimum age limit so we decided to give the band a chance even if I have to sit out on this competition.” Shellie shrugged as she glanced over at him still smiling.

“Well that’s very big of you.” Her dad patted her on the back. “Well, your mom and I are exhausted. I’m sure you two are ready to head out by now.”

“Good night, Baby!” Her mom once more hugged and kissed her as they made their way down the hall to their bedroom.

“Ok, I’ll be just a minute.” She raced off into her room.

Befuddled, he stood up stretching out his back. Hotan found himself grinning, amused at the fact that she had put him on the spot like that. After a few minutes, she came back with a black jacket and a backpack full of her things. They both took a minute to strap their helmets in place before pulling out of the driveway, heading for his place. She hugged his waist tighter than usual, then again, it had been a while since she had ridden on the bike. The fact it rides completely different even made him nervous.

She followed just behind him, neither one of them speaking as they made their way upstairs. Unlocking his door, he allowed her to enter first and trailed in behind her. Tossing her bag onto the couch, she slid her jacket off. He opened his fridge, leaning on the door as he scanned through the items. It wasn’t the he was hungry, or even thirsty. All he wanted was a moment longer to think, What possessed her to want to come home with me? Should I even have allowed her to?

“Thirsty? Hungry?” He glanced over at her.

“No thanks, I had pizza before you showed up.” She stifled a yawn.

“Ok,” Taking a quick swig out of the orange juice container, he walked into the living room rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know about you but I’m tired as hell. You kind of put me on the spot there, Shellie. Um, you can sleep on the couch or the mattress, doesn’t matter to me. Your choice.”

“Yea, I’m getting pretty sleepy myself.” She stood up walking over to him and hugged him. “If you don’t mind, I want to snuggle with you tonight.”

“Ok, a mattress on the floor isn’t much.” He could feel heat in his cheeks as he led her into the bedroom where his infamous mattress laid on the bare floor scattered with clothes. With a sigh he muttered, “And it’s never clean.”

“Wow, not into bedroom furniture at all, are you?” She grinned at him, “No worries, I don’t plan on doing anything with you tonight. I just wanted more quiet time with you, that’s all.”

“I promise the sheets and comforter are clean.” He kicked off his shoes and threw his shirt to the ground. “Quiet time you shall have. I am not going to be awake for much longer. Today was insane, yesterday even crazier, so for once I actually want to sleep.”

“I’m not worried about that.” She crawled on the mattress, scooping up and hogging one of his pillows.

“I should have made you bring your own pillows.” He left on his jeans and flopped down beside her, pulling her close to him. “I can always use you as my pillow.”

“Good night, Hotan.” She kissed him on the cheek and snuggled herself on his chest and shoulder.

“Night, Shellie.” Kissing the top of her head, he took in a deep breath of her smell and quickly dozed off.

He woke to the smell of something cooking. Shellie was no longer in bed with him, and he was hugging his pillow where she had been last night. Rubbing his eyes, trying to remove the sleep from them, he stretched out his legs and arms. It had been a long time since he slept that well especially since all of this chaos had started. She was busy over the stove making whatever she had managed to find ingredients for from the limited supplies his fridge and cabinets.

He turned the shower on and as he waited for the water to heat up, shaved the scruffy hairs on his chin and face. Soon the worn down face looked fresh. The shower greeted him with the pounding of the hot water against his face. The rest of his worries cut lose and followed the water down to the drain at his feet.

“Hey.” Her voice made him jerk as if he had been home alone and unaware of someone being there.

“Yeah?” He pulled the curtain back to make eye contact, once more baffled at how bold she was being.

Where did my shy Shellie go?

“I, um,” She blushed as she tried hiding her sheepish grin and hid her head behind the door better. “I made omelets, just, just wanted to let you know. Sorry.”

“Oh, yea?” He grinned, enjoying the awkward moment she had created and was now embarrassed by. “What kind? I didn’t think I had enough food for that.”

“Ham and cheese, it’s all you had.” She cleared her throat, as she shut the door, no longer being able to continue the conversation with him as her cheeks beamed red.

Pulling the curtain close again, he continued his blissful shower.

I really don’t know what’s gotten into her since last night, but at least it seems to be all her choice. To be honest, I am enjoying this confident behavior. It’s almost like we’re an old married couple that’s been together forever. That’s right, and then there was Talib acting weird. He said I could find him at the cathedral. I wonder if he’s been there the whole time. Maybe that’s why I feel so safe there? I mean I have this undoubting sensation to look up at the man for advice. It would make sense considering he’s supposedly my brother. If I were truly reborn again, what would that technically make me?

He shut the water off grabbing the towel hanging nearby.

“Took you long enough,” Shellie was sitting on the couch eating what little was left of her omelet as she flipped through one of the albums. “Wow, your mom was popular in high school. I don’t think you ever showed me this.”

“Yea, I guess she was.” He tightened the towel on his waist and walked into the kitchen to find his plate and fork ready for him next to a glass of orange juice. “Thanks for cooking breakfast. I don’t think I ate yesterday.”

“No problem.” She paused at a page in the album. “Is this, is this who I think it is?”

“Is this what?” His mouth was full as he leaned over, “Oh, him.”

He turned his back to her as he continued eating and she gathered the nerve to ask, “Is that your Dad?”

“Yea, that would be him.” He took several gulps of his juice. “Uncanny resemblance, huh?”

“Wow.” She returned her stare to the pictures. “No offense, but, you look a lot like him. There is no denying that he is your dad.”

“Yea, I know.” Finishing off the last of the omelet, he shoved his dirty dishes into the sink with a loud racket. “It’s almost taunting to stare in the mirror.”

“Well, we better get to Chaz’s.” She sighed, walking into the kitchen to begin washing the dishes.

“Thanks.” He turned her around and kissed her.

Her body had went tight but she started to kiss him back as he pressed her against the kitchen counter. Pulling his lips away he held her in a tight hug, as if his life depended on it. “But I couldn’t care less about my dad. I’ve got you.”

All she could do was hug him back and give him the comfort he had wanted for so long. This whole time he had been holding back letting himself appear soft, denying himself the security of being in someone’s arms.

Chapter Seventeen

They rode into to the downtown area, admiring the cool early morning air. Kyle wasn’t there yet, but that was normal for him to be running behind. Hotan pulled out his keys and unlocked the door to the club, letting Shellie in first. He took a cautious glance around the alley and shut the door tight, locking it. They quietly walked into the locker room, going about their tasks. Shellie smiled at him every time she passed or made eye contact with him. It was very comforting to feel that everything was as it should be. Grinning, he took in a big breath, glad to have found a calm moment in his life. They set the stage up, testing the equipment as they added one piece at a time.

It was awkward being there in that smoky club with no one else, not even Chaz to make his remarks. It seemed to have an echo as they made noises and strummed a string here and there. They were making the necessary arrangements to make this audition as painless as possible.

“Be sure to leave your spare bass up and a spot for them to plug into.” Hotan looked over at her as she strummed a line or two. “It’s hard to say if we’ll get anyone who may not bring their own in. People are weird like that.”

“Ok. Should I set the sound up on the open line?” She pulled the bass strap off and gently placed the bass on a stand she had brought out. “Or would that be pointless? I know everyone is different.”

“That’s your call. I don’t see how it would hurt. They are replacing you, and well, if that’s how you always have it when we play then it makes sense for them to play your settings.” He smiled at her as he headed back off stage to grab a table for the sheet music.

Hotan moved off stage, satisfied with the setup, leaving Shellie to configure the open line for her future replacement. He pulled a table closer to the stage and aligned three chairs for them to sit in. Dumping his book bag there, he walked over to the front doors. He took his time unlocking the door as he listened to her strumming rhythms in the background.

I taught her that one.

He had taught her what he knew about the bass and she absolutely took off with it. The one and only time that he had actually attempted to teach anyone anything and had managed to not lose his patience. It made him feel good to have been part of her love for the bass. Opening the door, he squinted at the sunlight, hot as it lay upon him. There was still no signs of anyone, or even Kyle.

“Hey!” Hotan whipped his head back to the left to see what was going on. “Hey, Hotan! I came to audition!”

“You?” He blinked as he watched Metsy, the girl from his math class, come skipping down the sidewalk. She was looking rather awkward with a bass case strapped to her back. “You play bass?”

“I’ve got a life outside math class, you know.” She laughed as she came to a stop in front of the club, straightening her punk yoked skirt out. “I saw the flyers and well, I figured it was worth the try.”

“Yea, definitely,” He opened the door wider to let her in. “I didn’t realize you were 18. To be honest, I didn’t think I would be seeing too many kids from school because of that.”

“Well, I guess that’s the advantage of being labeled slow in elementary school.” She huffed as she swung the case off her back and carried it in front of her. “I think I was held back like two times.”

“Really?” He wasn’t sure what would be the best response to the information that had been volunteered to him. “Well, we just finished setting up. If you want to sit and chill after walking all this way, you can.”

“Oh thanks, I appreciate it.” Metsy flopped down in a chair, happy to take a load off her feet. “Hey Shellie! What’s up?”

“Metsy!” Shellie chimed waving from the stage, placing her bass on its stand again. “It’s been awhile since I’ve seen you!”

“I know!” The two girls hugged. “We haven’t had a class together in some time.”

Hotan let them catch up with one another. Dragging the heavy ashtray out with him, he propped it as a doorstop. Kyle came around the alleyway, still rubbing the sleep from his eyes and yawning. Mumbling to himself, he was desperate to escape the bright morning light.

It was nice to be having a normal day. Everything else just seemed like a distant dream, despite all that he took in yesterday. He didn’t want to think about it. There was plenty of time later to start stressing over the details and create new theories later. Today he simply wanted to be the Hotan with a boring life, or at least while it lasted.

“Well, we’ll start when you’re ready, Metsy. Hard to say who else will show today?” He smiled to himself as he looked away from the bright skies.

“Sounds like a plan!” Metsy hopped up, full of energy as she unpacked her bass.

The day went by rather fast considering how few showed up for auditions. There were some good players, including Metsy, surprisingly. Hotan found himself not paying attention to the players, catching himself staring at Shellie. He was trying to gauge her reaction to the musicians on stage, but also enjoying every smile and giggle. It was keeping him from focusing on yesterday’s overload that kept knocking at the back of his head. He wasn’t sure if Kyle was even paying attention either. Half the time he was yawning or still rubbing his eyes. For now, he would indulge in one last attempt of a normal life before tackling the bizarre issues of his new emerging life.

Hotan sighed as he placed books in his locker. He was considering it being the last time he’ll see them at the rate his life was going. In fact, the only reason he was coming to school still was he wanted to see what Mr. Piedmont knew. School seemed to be one of the few places he could relax, being there among students made him feel partially human still.

Can I even consider myself human? I mean, it seems that we are technically people who adapted to possess powers to help us in a time of need. Do any of us really know why we are here and have these abilities? Was this a mistake or flaw in nature? Maybe I should just…

“Hey, are we still having a show tomorrow night?” Hisota’s voice pulled him from his thoughts.

“Yea, why are you asking?” He turned to look at him, surprised to see that Hisota wasn’t in his face. “You planning to show?”

“Well,” Hisota smiled to himself and let out a gratifying sigh. “Yes, and I wanted to see if someone could come with me. I met her this past week. Can you get her in?”

“Yea, I can get, her, in.” He raised an eyebrow at Hisota as his sentence fell apart. It had felt awkward to piece that sentence together. “Who is she?”

“Her name is Charlotte, cute too.” Hisota shrugged smirking. “Let’s just say, she caught me off guard.”

“No kidding. Anyway, it shouldn’t be an issue with Chaz.” Eyeing the clock, Hotan saw it was time to get to class. “I look forward to meeting her. See you tonight then.”

“I’ll bring her by afterschool and introduce her to you.” Hisota jerked himself off the lockers and left in the opposite direction.

Hotan shook his head, but couldn’t be happier that Hisota had a new distraction. All these years and he would have never thought of Hisota to go out with a girl. As long as he could remember, he would flirt and hit on him to the point it was spiteful and jealous in nature. In fact, back in elementary school Hisota was the big bad bully that seemed to get under everyone’s skin and made the other kids flat out miserable. On the other hand, he had been the silent kid in the background, a complete recluse.

He’ll never forget that one day out on the playground, watching as Hisota made his claim, taking one kid down at a time...

He was sitting there eating a snack when he heard a scream behind the pine trees and bushes next to the picnic table. It sounded like someone was in pain and hurt badly. With a sigh of annoyance Hotan had walked over to see what had happened since the teacher was numb to the screams of the kids running about. He came across Hisota and his latest victim, a boy who was new to the school. That boy was Kyle, and for the first time Hotan had a protective sensation wash over him. Considering new information, he knew why, but it’s amazing to know it was there at such a young age. He felt upset and pissed seeing Hisota shove him back on the ground and throw pinecones at him. Kyle had tears streaming down his face.

The kid, Kyle, had spent the last couple of days trying to get Hotan to talk. All day he would make it his personal goal to sit next to him and talk on and on about anything in hopes he would respond. He had found it amusing and entertaining to see how long Kyle was going to carry the process on. Most response he had given him was a nod here and there thanks to a new sense of guilt that would build up after some time.

“Hey! Back off!” Hotan’s voice had shook Hisota and he dropped the pinecone.

“Who are you?” Hisota was denser than he had given him credit for.

“Who cares?” He walked over and helped Kyle up. “Why are you picking on him?”

“Because he’s a meanie head!” Kyle sniffled with his bottom lip quivering as he botched his efforts to hold back from crying further.

“Plenty of reasons, he’s got red hair and I want his gummy snacks.” Hisota walked up and was nose-to-nose, poking Hotan in the chest. “But since you’re going to be in my way, I’ll make you pay for it.”

“No.” He looked at Hisota, ignoring the little finger digging into his chest. “How about you give him your snack as an apology for what you did to him.”

“What?” Hisota laughed, “Yea right.”

“Yea! Gimme yours!” Kyle antagonized from behind him, “Meanie!”

“How about I beat you up again?” Hisota shot a glare Kyle’s way and he rightfully withered back into remission. “Just try me!”

“I don’t think so.” He grabbed Hisota by the shirt and slammed him against the pine tree. “If I ever see you picking on him, I’m going to beat you up.”

“Ugh.” Hisota was at a loss for words as he stared into Hotan’s, a single tear making its way down one cheek.

“Come on, Kyle. Let’s go.” He turned and walked back to the picnic table with Kyle at his heels like a puppy dog.

“Don’t be messing with us!” Kyle was trying to put on the tough guy act and began puffing himself up.

Hisota had been left there, against the pine tree sobbing. The teacher had marveled at the sudden change of behavior. He stopped picking on everyone and began following Hotan religiously. It was bizarre that somehow that they had become friends. For Kyle it was a friendship, but Hisota had developed this odd obsession with Hotan, creating this boyish crush towards him. Hisota worshipped the ground Hotan walked on until high school. At that point, it began to turn sour. A jealous lover type rage that was getting irritating as of late and embarrassing.

Everyone had concluded that Hisota was in love with Hotan. Now Hotan was starting to think he was dragging this girl with him in hopes of making Hotan jealous. If that were the case, it was wrong. Hisota should know he had no interest in him, and to move on. He was a good looking guy and there was no reason for him not to be able to snag a relationship with whomever he wanted, whether it was male or female.

Shellie had seen her share of Hisota’s fits and schemes. The swindles he made beat the cruelest pranks of jocks and cheerleaders. Malicious and outright demonic would be one way to describe the ways Hisota would attempt to drive a stake between him and Shellie. She had fallen victim to conveniently dropped food items, bubble gum in the hair, to even demeaning rumors. Hisota was caught hanging posters so vulgar he was almost expelled over the chaos. How or why Shellie lasted through the heavier antics was a miracle in itself.

The last year was more subtle, the pranks and mean acts fading away. He would just simply create a confrontation with Hotan, no one else, and then simply disappear. That is until he got tired of hiding away when no one seemed to care or thought he had another opportunity to piss Hotan off further.

All he could hope for that this new girlfriend of Hisota’s was legitimate and a new outlet. He seemed to be the type that wouldn’t mind having a significant other who worships his every step. It was very clear Hisota wasn’t going to get that from him, especially since he has never done anything significant. You couldn’t even label Hisota a good guy. If he had witnessed a charitable act by him, then hell had frozen over twice fold. It just wasn’t in his nature to be kind to others. He couldn’t imagine him risking his own life for anyone, not even his own mother.

Once more science class was dragging. Everyone was busy filling in answers on the five-page ditto on yesterday’s lab. Surely, the teacher was going to be testing us on all of these procedures later this month. He sighed as he shoved the assignment to the side and eyed the Book of Ancients in his bag. He pulled it out and continued his research. He started jumping sections now, looking for answers.

Book of Ancients: Judgment

He is the most loving and forgiving man on Earth.

True to his title of elder brother, Talib should have been the leader of the Levites. He was kindhearted, but had the impeccable ability to make sound judgments. Advising his younger brother with utmost wisdom and command as if this was natural. Never was there disdain or jealousy about their father’s decision to make him advisor and Hotan official chief. Instead he was the backbone to his younger brother Hotan. Together they were strong leaders whose only mistake was trusting the council of elders. The council members were supposed to work in conjunction to them. The elders’ selfish espionage led to the destruction of the thirteenth tribe of Israel, now labeled in the history books as the Levites.

Life before their exile from the motherlands, Talib and his wife Saphellia had been attempting to produce a child. Despite the years of failure, they never loss hope or faith that someday they would be blessed with one. That dream ended when the village burnt to the ground. It further died on the island of Eden, when it became clear that our curses would not allow us the pleasure of continuing our lives or legacies through children. I never understood where all that strength came from to hold such strong happy faces. Perhaps unlike myself, they were able to accept it as part of the sacrifices needed for the miracles we had been given.

Talib was the element of Judgment. It was fitting and the control he had over his powers was far superior than everyone else. There were several tells for seeing who was actively using their abilities. Markings across the skin, a flaming aura around their bodies, and in lower quantities one would have glowing eyes. When he invoked his ability, not even a shine in his eyes could be seen. It was exciting and terrifying to watch over the centuries how powerful that one element could be. In several cases, Talib had shifted history with one shift to a judgment call. As with all the abilities, he controlled all aspects of this power. The element was interesting as he could make it impossible for someone to decide on something, but more often it was used to force decisions and judgments for the greater good.

I was most amazed at how easy it was for him to control a large quantity of people all at once. This was a hard thing for the other Humanity based immortals to do, since it required an ungodly amount of stamina. Unable to turn a blind eye, he had made a judgment call to save hundreds of lives. They did not have enough resources or room to save the village with one ship. He had advised the captain and mayor to give up on the settlement and leave to Croatan Island until they can return in a larger ship. Neither of them agreed with him. Frustrated, he watched children playing and chasing some chickens.

Death was coming, and he could not stop him, but he could make these people disappear before its arrival. It was the first time I had witnessed him sweat and reveal his tattoos as he pushed his power out and over. I watched in awe as everyone stopped what they were doing and marched for Croatan Island. The ship’s Captain and Crew immediately turned back to the ship, a sudden decision to abandon the settlement in every aspect. With one last wave of his powers, he cast that they forever forget about Roanoke Colony. It was the last time I would ever see Talib, the element of Judgment.

This would soon be a place for Death to reside.

Chapter Eighteen

Hotan froze as he finished the last line. He read it again and again. It made his insides twist every time. Something wasn’t right.

Something is wrong. This book was written as his last will and testament. What was he doing in Roanoke Colony? What did he do that required this drastic of a solution? I need to know what you did, Hotan. I can’t fix this. I don’t even know what I am supposed to fix. What went so wrong that no one but you knew about? Or does Talib really know? What is with all this impending Death? Was it Geliah? Or is there something else out there?

He went throughout his day mulling over the terrifying statement, a place for Death to reside. It was getting more disturbing. He needed to focus on this mess he had avoided for weeks. Since Lilly’s display of power, he had pushed it off his mind. More information was needed but where to start. He wasn’t ready to confront Talib, there was more he wanted to figure out. Before attempting to bash heads with the most powerful immortal, he would need to build an arsenal of information. Talib could twist him around before he would realize it was even happening.

I don’t want to repeat that dinner incident again. Where can I start looking? Who do I turn to? Jake? Lilly? Is there someone else?

“My goodness! You look older than me today.” Mr. Piedmont’s wrinkled his face in disdain. “Perhaps I can help?”

“No offense, Mr. Piedmont, but I don’t think you can.” Hotan slumped into the chair as the weight of his burden sludged over him. “I don’t think you’d believe me if I even told you.”

“Believe you?” Mr. Piedmont smiled at him and leaned over his desk. “Believe that you’re the reincarnate of Hotan? Or that you feel an overwhelming obligation to fix a problem you, nor Jake, Talib or the rest of us have any information on? My boy, please remember you aren’t alone in this matter like you think you are. We want to help and find answers as much as you do.”

“How, how do you?” He sat up in the chair looking the old man in the eyes. You too? You’re one of us too?

Yes and I am very worried about you. You keep on going at this alone, but remember we are just as lost as you are on the matter. Mr. Piedmont let out a heavy sigh as he leaned back. “I must say I admire the brilliance of your mind. Hotan always had an amazing ability to take in the world around him and use that information to its fullest. Here lately you’ve been your own obstacle, which never does anyone any good.”

“I can’t believe you’re one of us too.” He could not shake the feeling that he had been oblivious. “It’s just, I have no idea who is who anymore.”

“Please understand, I am more of an observer. I have been watching over you and I must say, you’re not doing so well.” It was the first time he had ever heard a serious tone from the old man. “You have to be a little more aware of what’s going on. If you keep going down this path, you will fail to protect yourself, or worse, your loved ones. It’s no grand secret that you are colorblind and have brilliant moments of seeing colors. I didn’t confront you about it sooner because I was hoping Talib would take charge. Honestly, I think we’ve all been praying your memories would return. Until you unlock your powers, do not let it be known you see any color. This was a mistake you made with me between that painting and the candy. If you are wondering why I am telling you now, then let me say this: It has never taken past a month. Never longer than a month for any of us to remember who we were before.” Except you, Hotan.

“Never past a month.” Hotan buried his face in his hands, feeling agonizingly sick. “It’s been over three months since this all started back when I passed out in the church. How many more times have I failed to take heed of the warning signs? How ignorant of me to put everyone at risk and letting my emotions trip me up. I’m so blind…”

“If imminent danger became of concern, I would have said something sooner, Hotan.” Mr. Piedmont stood up, staring out the window at students running the track. “We all have come to the conclusion that our beloved leader is no more. Talib never told us, but considering what we do know he isn’t with us anymore. For how long? We can’t say, but, I may be able to help you if you’ll let me. We are running out of time, and I can’t help but feel that Geliah will not hold up to his own promises to leave you alone.”

“Help me?” Pulling his head out of his hands, he stared at Mr. Piedmont’s back. “Do you know something that I can use? How can you help me?”

“I must apologize. The help I can provide you with is not in terms of having information nor the ability to help you discover what powers that lay dormant.” He turned, his face tight and gaunt. “I can use my power to help you control what abilities you do have, make you more aware of what you do possess thus far. Being the element of the Mind, I can enhance one’s comprehension to beyond the normal limits. I guess that explains why I ended up being a principal of a school. Watching all of the kids explore the world around them and evolve in the way they think, it feels good to me. Ironically, I can say it has helped me regain my strength, my confidence even, in my own abilities.”

“Your power, the element of the Mind, one of the three elements that make up a person as a whole, right?” Glaring into Mr. Piedmont’s eyes, Hotan realized this was not only his own burden anymore. “How bad of a hit are you going to take to do this? How dangerous is it for you use your power? Are there recoils for using them on another immortal? Have you even done this before?”

“In the past, the answer to these were no. I may pass out for some time after this, but I do not know what the overall reaction will be for us both.” The old man closed his eyes, taking in a deep breath. “None of us knows what condition your powers are in, and even though I have helped others, Rebirth has always been much more than our own. In fact, it was powerful enough that Hotan could easily overtake all of us. There was never an instance where any of us ever dare attempt to use our powers towards him, that I know of. I don’t think I ever recalled Hotan using his element against any of us, other than casting the reincarnation spell.”

“He was that strong.” Rubbing the back of his neck, Hotan attempted to lay the hairs back down as chills trickled across his spine. “Mr. Piedmont. Don’t do this if it will be a risk to your life. I’ve seen Lilly push her limits, and I know it’s a painful ordeal. Rebirth is a power no one but the former Hotan understood, and I can’t promise my own control or understanding of it. My power is about life and death, and-”

“We need you to figure this out for that reason. You have a strong enough mind and will for it, but you need help getting it on track. I am doing this not only for you or myself; this is for the sake of everyone. The last thing we want is you using your power without knowing and aging someone forward or worse. I know very well this would be one of the many concerns you had weighed over and over in your mind. You’re smart. Causing someone’s untimely death is a possibility with that unstable power you hold.” Mr. Piedmont’s voice shook he continued, “Let me do this. It’s the least I can do for you. You are suffering the most in all of this and I want to do my part to help you. I truly think Hotan did not realize that things would go so sour. He took all the burdens upon himself and gave us centuries of living out normal lives over the centuries. Now it’s my turn to return the favor, and if I can at least help you prevent-”

“Where do you want to do this at?” Hotan cut him short as he made his decision on the matter, “I don’t think here is a good place for it.”

“No.” The old man released a chuckle. “Of course not here, goodness. I have talked to Jake. We will go to his office when you are ready. Do you want some time to think about it? There’s no rush.”

“Let’s do this tonight.” Grabbing up his book bag, he gave a hard look at Mr. Piedmont. “I will meet you at Jake’s office tonight. That will give me time enough to settle my nerves. I can’t afford to delay this any further. And more importantly, thank you.”

“Thank me when the deed is done.” He sat back into his office chair, exhausted. “Thank me when I’ve done my job.”

Hotan walked out of the office, firm on the decision he had made.

I can’t pretend that this whole ordeal is my problem alone. I am only a piece of a much larger puzzle and need to take advantage of any help. Amazing, Mr. Piedmont is one of us. How many more do I already know? Who has already attempted to show themselves to me in hopes that I would remember and recognize them? Never more than a month. A month had gone and passed three times. There was no hiding the fact that something is wrong and they all are very aware of the bitter situation. Talib knows more, but he hasn’t clued anyone on what is going on. Why was he making himself so distant over this? Was he mourning the loss of his brother? How much more complicated could this be? What were he and the others not seeing that Talib was aware of?

From habit, he found himself walking into the cathedral aiming to clear his head. As he entered, he could hear the distant sounds of school ending for the day. He wasn’t here to see Talib, and he was very relieved to not see him or anyone else. All he wanted was to feel safe for a moment, gather his nerves.

Tonight is going to be intense. No one knows what kind of outcome will come of Mr. Piedmont’s power. What had volunteered himself for? What was the end goal from this?

He sat down in the front row, slumping his head back. Staring endlessly at the towering ceilings above, many questions were filling his head. He needed answers, not more riddles. Worse off, Hotan was no more. There were no memories coming to his rescue and worse, Geliah wanted his head. Cassandra was by his side. Poor Callan needs help getting out of there. He could communicate, but obviously, he was being watched.

The best I can do is blast my own thoughts out like a public service announcement.

He knew Talib, Piedmont, Jake, Kyle and Lilly were immortals. That left it to nine, including himself.

No ten, there was Tina too.

That was half of the Tribe according to the book. There are 20 in total and he had 10 so far as a head count. That wasn’t a bad start, but how many more did he encounter and not realize who they were? Fear, Earth, Metal, Water, Fire, Lust, Mind, Insanity, Judgment and Rebirth were all accounted for.

Taking in a deep breath he almost missed the old musky smell that previously filled the cathedral. This heavenly place had laid in ruin three months ago, and the mystery of how it looked in its prime solved. Leaning his elbows on his knees, he gazed up at the statue. Today it gave him a stone cold face. No hope, no smile, no frown, no clue of emotion on that face for him. He was starting to indulge in the fact he would see something different in that face. Then again, he was trying to harden his nerves in time for tonight.

Is that what I see being reflected now? An encouragement to be stone-faced about the ordeal I am about to endure?

He smirked, silently hoping he could look that regal tonight. The queasy feeling in his gut had not given up.

“Hey man! You alright?” Kyle was walking down the aisle way towards him. “I was a little worried when you weren’t leaning against the tree.”

“How long has it been?” Hotan’s jaw tensed as his mind echoed one fact, never pass a month. “How long have you remembered everything, Kyle? You remember who you are, right?”

“I…” Kyle was silent for quite some time as he stood there, his head low. “I woke up remembering a lot. A day or so after the marking showed up on my back. I, I’m sorry, I didn’t want you to know…”

“So you’ve had all your memories back for almost a good three months.” Staring deep into his reflection on the marble floor, Hotan was unsure of how he should feel. My friend has been missing this whole time…

“Hotan, I’m so sorry.” Kyle’s tone drastically shifted to one that sounded of maturity and experience. It was beyond the point of being out of character for the Kyle he used to know. “I’m still your friend. I didn’t want to take that from you, nor did I want to lose such a wonderful treasure of being your closest friend. You’ve done so much for me...”

“I’m not that Hotan.” His throat tightened as he fought back the boiling upset that clawed at him. “I’ve done nothing.”

“I’m not talking about that past.” Kyle’s feet stopped in front of him, but he couldn’t face the stranger that stood before him. “I am talking about all the times you went out of your way to help me. From saving me from being bullied to being a good friend when there wasn’t anyone else for me to go to. I may remember everything, but I’m one of the few who have the pleasure of truly knowing who you are. In my eyes, you’re neither the old Hotan nor a remake of him. You’re the friend I grew up with, someone who cares for those around him. I will never ask you to become anyone other than yourself.”

“Kyle…” Gathering his nerve he looked up at Kyle. He was shocked to see the tears that streamed down his cheeks, as he stood there solemn faced. “You-”

“Please understand,” Kyle cut him off as he continued his emotional plea, “I had no intentions of being misleading or deceptive. My aim was to return the friendship you’ve given me. It breaks my heart to see you going through this. Losing your only friend would have left you feeling alone, I know you well.” Kyle rubbed the tears from his face, desperate to maintain what little composure he had. “I am so sorry you have to go through all of this. It’s not fair to you. You’re an infant in the terms of who we are. We mourn losing our leader, but the hardships laid upon you tug at our heart more so, my friend.”

“I just wish you had let me know.” He felt like he was drowning as he placed his hands on his Kyle’s shoulders. “Thank you. Thank you for caring about being my friend above everything else. You’ve always been the one I felt closest to.”

“Are you going to take Piedmont up on his offer?” The words that fell from Kyle’s lips were awkward to Hotan’s ears. The tone, accent, and presence of that voice had made a drastic shift. It was a stranger’s voice, and it failed to bring him the comfort he once enjoyed in the past.

“Yea, we’re going to give it a try tonight.” They sat down side-by-side on the pew. “We’ll be meeting at Jake’s office around midnight.”

“I want to come. I want to be there to help.” It was a command, not a request for permission. “What time will I be bringing you there?”

“I,” Hotan tripped on his thought, stunned at the taking charge attitude. “I’ll most likely need a ride depending how this goes. I’m thinking eleven or so. It should give me enough time to settle my nerves.”

“I’ll see you at your place then. None of us know how this is going to work.” Kyle gave him a few hearty pats on the back and left him in peace.

Sitting there in the cathedral, collecting his thoughts and feelings was the only thing he could do. That was no longer the friend he knew. No matter how much he comforts him, that is not his Kyle. He was as gone and dead as the real Hotan himself now. A gaping hole and sickening feeling is all this Hotan had left of the world he knew. It came down to him embracing this new reality. It had officially taken over. His depression sunk lower as his emotions screamed inside him. The pain that tugged at his heart competed with how he felt the night he lost his mother.

I am so tired of all the hurt…

Hotan had made up his mind. He would milk what was left of his normal. The remainder of his mortality achieving his diploma and competing with his band. After that, he would enjoy his last day of his old existence. He deserved to say farewell to the life he thought he led before switching to the path of being an immortal.

Tonight he would accept the help offered to him. It felt as if he would be drown into the deep black abyss that was currently swallowing his soul.

I need to control the element of Rebirth. If I can do that, I can figure out what my predecessor did that was so wrong. I have to become the replacement Hotan’s people needs me to be. Talib has failed to step in and the rest of them can only lend me a hand when they can. I am the key. Some place within me, I have the answers that none of us know. All I have to do is manage to turn on that light and see it.

Hotan kept Shellie in the dark again. As a treat, he took her out to a fine dining restaurant for dinner. Enjoying the moment, he allowed himself to lose track of the time. All he could tell her was that he may be disappearing for some time to take care of things, not to worry. As usual Shellie simply smiled and gave him encouragements to not be gone for too long. Hotan couldn’t help but think that this may be the last time anyone would see a smile or hear a laugh come from him. Not that he ever did much of either, but she always managed to get it out of him.

How much am I going to change after this ordeal tonight? Will it be like Kyle? A completely different personality?

It was a silent ride with the strange new Kyle. Even his driving habits had changed. It felt so wrong and foreign to him sitting in that same car with his friend’s doppelganger. Hotan couldn’t even make eye contact with him, but Kyle’s heavy body language spoke volumes. He felt guilty for not being that friend for Hotan anymore. The silence had grown too suffocating for Hotan. Desperate to drown out the thoughts, he turned on the radio. It avoided any talking as well. The painful emotions that boiled within him wanted him to act out, but he was stubborn. Hotan lost his thoughts to the lyrics as the rain on the highway grew thicker. Lightning started to shout loudly over all the sounds of the traffic. Seether’s 69 Tea was starting, and his panicking thoughts started seeping through…

I won’t die in there.

I don’t care if I’m lost.

I just want her to be safe.

“Hotan, we’re here.” He jerked as Kyle shook his shoulder, waking him up. “You ok? You don’t have to do this tonight. We can wait as long as you want.”

“I’m fine.” Rubbing his face, he marveled over the fact he fell asleep on the ride over. “It’s not like I’ve been sleeping much lately.”

“Sorry, come on. Let’s get this done and over with.” Kyle patted him on the back as a silent form of inspiration. “This will at least keep you from broadcasting your thoughts like a radio station.”

“Heh,” He finally looked him in the eyes. “Is it really that bad? You really still hear everything?”

“Hate to say it but, yea man. You’re very loud.” Paying no heed to the rain falling around them, they grinned at each other. The front of the Police headquarters was unlocked and after flashing their badges, security waved them by. “It’s been very clear that this whole ordeal. It has weighed heavily on your mind and other than that, Shellie. I never knew you put so much thinking behind everything you do.”

“Oh man.” He felt his cheeks go hot as they walked onto the elevator.

“Don’t worry. No one would dare say anything about it to you.” Hotan was starting to relax; maybe this new Kyle wasn’t as bad as he had thought. “And if you decide to back out at last minute, there’s no shame. We’re all nervous about this.”

“The quicker we do this, the more likely I can focus on the next step.” They stared at each other in silent reserve. “If it even works.”

Hotan took a slow, deep breath as they came to a stop on the top floor. As they walked off the elevator, he could feel a tingly feeling in his joints as his nerves began to unwind. It was making each movement feel almost painful, even unstable. The dark, empty receptionist area was not helping the gloomy atmosphere. An experiment was about to take place in the back room. The test subject was going to be him. Hotan walked through the valley of shadows that the hallway cast.

Feeling miniscule as he stopped in front of the doors to Jacob’s office, he thought, This is it.

He had made up his mind. There was no turning back. He needed all the help he could get, no matter what form it came to him in. Kyle laid a heavy hand on his shoulder and pushed passed him, entering the office.

“Hey there, Hotan.” Jacob turned to face them. “If you want to back down for the night, don’t be shy about it. This is no time to play it tough, kid.”

“There is no telling what will happen when I use my powers to help your mind focus. I aim to enhance your perception, your comprehension of the power you can access.” Mr. Piedmont had a solemn look on his face. “No one has ever used their powers towards Hotan in the past. I have used it to help others master their powers before, but, that’s as much as I have ever dared to try.”

“I understand.” It was getting harder to hold his composure as he walked over to the chaise lounge where Mr. Piedmont stood. “Let’s see if this does anything.”

In silence, he laid down as Jacob pulled up another chair for the old man to use. Hotan closed his eyes, too anxious to watch the taut faces that surrounded him. Feeling the clammy, shaking hands gently touching either side of his temples made him jerk. He desperately tried to keep his heartbeat steady and calm. The thoughts in his head were running rampant as they spilled forward.

How bad is this going to hurt? How bad of a shape will Mr. Piedmont be in after attempting to dive into my mind? How much of my mind do I not know exist? Will this even work?

Hotan could feel himself drifting, almost as if he was freefalling into an empty void. It was startling sensation and broke his thoughts free of their despair. He felt disconnected with his body besides the faint warm sensation coming from his temples. Floating there, he still asked himself a billion questions. It echoed in the empty space, his mind gave no reply. Looking about in the floating gray, nothing was there. He was by himself in this vast span of haze that he assumed was his mind. Far as he could tell, nothing was happening. It was going nowhere.

I need this to work.

I want it to work.

I’ll make it work.

A wave shot through him. It was electrifying and pulsed with great force. It was like a drop of water hitting a placid surface. The sound waves had amplified this drop a billion times, shifting it out of the ordinary. It flowed through everything around it. His entire body started to heat up. Hotan felt like he was on fire. It felt right.

What is this?

Don’t stop.

The gray quickly melted away to a mass of glowing blue that swallowed him whole. Another wave of energy shot out. There was something there. Something he knew he needed.

Don’t let go.

Hotan felt his hand snatch up and grab a startled arm that had pulled away. Fear raced through the arm as a second pulse released from Hotan’s body. He could feel himself draw upon something from his grip. Hotan was using Mr. Piedmont’s powers to his advantage to dig deeper into himself. If there was any shouting from the motion, he couldn’t hear it. He focused within his own mind, taking no acknowledgement of what was going on outside of it.

Something new was here and without hesitation, he reached out to a white orb. There inside his mind it was just him and that glowing, burning ball of blue energy. It’s glow had engulfed the space.

This has to be it. This has to be what I am looking for.

As his hand melded into it, another wave shot out. There was so much power there. A blinding flash took over. His ears and body hummed as it poured over him. It was like being spoken to in every language humanly possible all at once. He was desperate, trying to catch the information or at least pin point one line out of the flood.

What is all of this coming from so deep inside me? Why was this locked up? Was the real Hotan afraid of his own power? Is he still here?

Stop it. You’re going too far. He could hear someone else plead from inside the blinding light.

I have to. I have to unlock this to fix everything. He pushed further into the white energy that seared his hand.

I went too far and destroyed everything. I was selfish. It was burning him, attempting to push him out.

I won’t make that mistake. He broke pass it.

Another pulse hummed louder than the ones before it. It shot out from the orb with more force, a scream riding on its wind.

The real Hotan had shattered.

Hotan hadn’t disappeared as he had made him believe prior. He had been hiding. Imprisoned himself deep within his host, afraid of what he had done.

With the former Hotan gone, he could inherit everything there was of the element of Rebirth. Information spilled over him as he stood in the light. As he took more and more in, he could feel its knowledge within him. Out of all that he had received, none of it would be memories. Those were not his to have. That belonged to the broken soul that had finally left him.

Stop it! Hotan snap out of it! You’ve gone too far! Talib’s infuriated voice ripped at him.

He could see lines of silver energy enter the glowing realm of his mind. Watching them as they glided over to him from all directions, he gently touched one. It clung to him, tugging lightly. Hotan smiled as he realized what he was seeing. This was Talib’s power creeping into his mind. He could see it, feel it, and best of all, manipulate it.

He waved his hand about and saw that he could make it let go and move about like puppets. The mechanics of how these powers worked was clear to him: They were an extension of one’s soul. He could feel the desperation in those appendages as Talib tried to pull him out of his own mind.

This whole time another soul was blocking me from gaining access. There can only be one user, one soul to contain the element of Rebirth. The remnants of the old Hotan needed to be wiped out. Did Talib already know this?

Please! You need to come out! You’re not physically strong enough for this! This is too much! Too soon! Talib’s voice cracked, choked, as it pleaded with him

Was he crying?

Another pulse released and Hotan gasped for air as he allowed himself to come out. He went from the comfort of the heat to the cold damp sensation of his body. Releasing Mr. Piedmont’s arm, he rolled off the chaise. Hitting the floor, he succumbed to coughing and gasping for air. Frantically looking up, his vision was blurred. The old man’s blob staggered backwards.

His jaw was painfully grabbed, forced to look at another blurred face. He could only see the silver blur on top of a pale skin tone splotch.

“What were you thinking?” Talib was furious, but he could feel his energy fading quickly. “You went too far! Why! Why did you push so far!”

He could hear Mr. Piedmont repeat over and over as everything started to go dark, “He, he didn’t let me use any of my power. I don’t know how he did it!”

“Whose idea was this! This was naïve of you all!” Talib had dropped his jaw and was fuming after the others in the room. “We have no idea how unstable he was to begin with!”

“It,” Hotan grabbed what he hoped was the back of Talib’s pant leg. “It was my idea.”

“You shouldn’t even be conscious!” Jacob exclaimed. “Let’s at least get the poor guy off the floor, Talib! We can discuss this when he wakes up.”

It was the last thing he heard as he felt himself go limp, no energy to even shiver the cold that consumed him.

Book of Ancients: Rebirth

Rebirth.

This is my curse.

“Ye are cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, even this whole nation.”

Malachi 3:9

This last book of the old testament speaks volumes to what has happened to us and our people. My torture would not allow me to take back what I have already loss, what had been robbed from me. It was clear I had cursed myself with my obsessions, yearnings to try and use the power given to me to fix all that was taken from us. In the end, I had fallen into my own selfishness and set aside the teachings like a fool.

No matter how many times I tried, I could only use the forward momentum of Rebirth. I could bring age to all things, but no youth could be returned. There was no rewinding time to undo what was done. Even if I had figured this feat out, it would not have filled the void in my heart. My curse had eaten my heart and soul by this point and I have spent decades, centuries repenting for the events I put in motion.

I blame myself. It was my doing that I placed us all in purgatory. Perhaps I really did notice my powers first, but I was consumed my grief. The obsession I had over the loss of my wife had taken its hold. Our powers originated from my element, that much I can be sure of. It was not my intention to curse the others, to spread this disease that my corruption created.

Trying to be mindful of everyone else perhaps was how I accidentally imposed the abilities on them. Constantly I reminded myself that I needed to push back my sorrows and focus on those who were looking to me as a leader. I failed. Blinded by greed, I did not heed any of the warning signs. Instead, I spread my wickedness onto the innocent lives who were closest to me.

Talib had tried so many times to comfort me, but seeing him with his wife Saphellia ravaged my mind with jealous thoughts. This would be followed with the drowning depression of images of my wife, pregnant with our unborn son. She almost made it here with me, but the sea swallowed her. Where did I fail? I wish I had been the one who drowned in that storm. If I had not made it, then the doom that I unleashed on earth would have never came into existence.

I gave birth to Death.

Its rage consuming the masses riddles the history books. I have sinned more times than I want to confess. As I write this memoir, I am aiming to repent. Death has been following my trail, seeking me out across lands old and new. The element of Rebirth stirs within me as he gets ever closer. These people came to a new land, but I will have to find a means to persuade them to leave. I came here to separate myself from civilization in hopes of avoiding a mass killing yet again.

Talib is here, he has also been seeking me out. Perhaps I should give up hiding from him. If any element was best suited for persuasion, it would be Judgment. He does not know about Death. I pray I never have to explain my selfish actions. Maybe he does know of my Death and what may come to pass in this new world?

Before leaving our paradise, I made a grave mistake and hope to right the wrong I have done. It was immoral for me to bring Death into this world and then cast him out of paradise. I am not God. That was not my place to decide who should stay or go. There is no shaking the feeling that this action is the reason none of us will ever be allowed to rediscover that island. This is why Malachi speaks of “I will not open you the windows of heaven.” I cannot shake that this is the warnings and end result of what happened.

Centuries of thinking and planning has gone into this moment I am waiting for. In case it fails, I hope this book provides some light on the matter. This is not a request for forgiveness, nor hopes for understanding. My only wish is to confess my sins, to explain what I have done in hopes of stopping the plague I have fueled over thousands of years.

Talib, I am sorry I failed to take in your words of wisdom. If I had not been blinded by my grief, perhaps none of this would have happened. Even after bestowing the gift of Judgment to you, I still would not let your power persuade me. I was stubborn and ignorant. From you, I wish to be forgiven for what I have done and will do after I close this book for the final time.

Death has a name. He calls himself Iapetos.

I cast him out from our island, and he raged war among the people. They called him a Titan, a God of sorts, who aimed to defy his father according to the myths and histories from the Greeks. There are no words to describe the pain I feel to see his anger echoed in the history books so clear.

I am his father. It was me who willed him to life. It matters not if it was unintentional. In a moment of greed, I attempted to bring my wife back and instead was greeted by a strange man claiming to be my son. Crawling out of the ocean, pale and shivering as he reached out to my with those dark, sorrowful eyes. My selfishness darkened my heart. Enraged, I exiled him. I was naïve, to think that a power I could only control in a forward motion would not bring life to the unborn child. Why had I wanted her over my own child? May she forgive me for casting our child to the side...

Due to his condition, he had become the embodiment of Death. There are twenty-one immortals in total. After what happens when I face Iapetos for one final time, there may be only twenty. The things I have spent centuries deciding on and experimenting with will be put to action here in the new world. One of us will need to dissolve into the unknown. Whether my power will be passed on to a new holder is still a mystery to even me. If that is the case, I pray he finds this journal and know that I never intended for anyone to carry my curse as I have.

If I fail, may God protect the poor soul that will be met with vengeance intended for me. I am the one who was brought Death to this world. It was me who allowed him to consume so many lives. History may have labelled these atrocities as natural and man-made but I know the truth. These waves of mass deaths were intended to ensnare me, but Iapetos failed. Death cannot claim Rebirth, and Rebirth cannot claim Death. They are one in the same but play very different and active roles in life and nature.

Chapter Nineteen

“Do you think he’ll ever wake up at all?” He could hear Kyle, but he couldn’t respond. “That was the scariest thing to feel, let alone to see. I’ve never seen anyone’s powers pulse out in waves like that.”

“I have no idea.” Talib’s voice was much softer compared to the last time he heard it. “To be honest I am not sure what he did or what exactly happened.”

“This is my fault. I shouldn’t have even tried.” Mr. Piedmont’s voice was heavy with guilt. “But he grabbed me when I pulled back. I still don’t understand how he was using my powers of his own freewill. It was amazing. I used none of my energy source. All that power. I had no idea he was that strong.”

“I never knew too much about my brother’s abilities to begin with.” Talib sighed and he could feel a rag placed on his forehead, warm and comforting to the touch. “It was dangerous to attempt. Far as I knew, he was unstable. His power would raise and drop sporadically. I was trying to figure out a way to first stabilize it before attempting to help him learn his abilities. He was a ticking time bomb.”

“What kind of readings are you getting now?” Kyle was almost mumbling, as if hating to ask the question. “Is he, is he ok?”

“Well,” He could hear Talib lean back in a chair that gave out a mild groan. “He has been the most stable I have ever felt. I do not think my brother ever got his powers to lie as calm as I feel Hotan has done. At the same time, it has made it hard for me to be able to go in and feel around. He has managed to seal every leak he had prior.”

“You can’t get in?” It was Mr. Piedmont again. “You, of all, can’t find a crack?”

“Indeed I cannot.” Another Talib sigh of frustration. “I have no idea when he will come to. It could be weeks, months, possibly longer. The waves of energy he released were massive. I have no idea how his body managed to handle the payload like it did. I am unable to even come close to one of those waves in power. You would think it would tear someone apart.”

“My word…” Mr. Piedmont was speechless.

“He’s been down for over a week.” Kyle’s voice was sad and low. “Pushing two weeks in fact.”

Two weeks! Frantic at the information, his body wouldn’t twitch nor could he manage to open his eyes. All Hotan had were his hearing and thoughts. I’ve been unconscious for two weeks!

“Oh my god!” Kyle exclaimed in excitement. “Look at that! He is awake!”

I can’t move! They could hear him. I can’t do anything!

“I would hope not.” Talib scoffed. “You put your body through an immense exposure. The fact that you are somewhat awake is a miracle. We can only assume your power kept you from dying after the stunt you pulled.”

“Don’t be so harsh.” Mr. Piedmont scorned Talib and released a sigh. It was as if he had been holding his breath for quite some time. “It is a relief to know you’re ok! You gave us quite the scare, sonny.”

You think not being able to move or open your eyes is ok? How do I fix this? He couldn’t stand the idea he had wasted so much time. Is there any way to recover faster?

“Yea, to take it easy.” Kyle giggled. “Your mind obviously handled the onslaught ok, but your body is going to take a lot longer there, Buddy. Guess you’ll be stuck here until you can get moving again.”

Where is here anyway? I can’t look around help me out here. It was depressing to know he couldn’t speed up the process. This was going to be a long road to recovery.

“You are at my home.” Talib did not give up his stern voice. “You are going to stay here for a while until we can get you back on your feet.”

Oh this sucks. If only he could sigh. It just doesn’t feel right not being able to sigh.

“I am the only one who has the time and space for it, as well as experience.” He could hear Talib leaving his chair. “Come on everyone. He will never get to sleep knowing we are in the room. The sooner he goes back to sleep the quicker his body can heal.”

“Aw man. Well, I guess we can talk later Hotan.” Kyle was on the other side of him from the sound of his voice. “You don’t have to push so hard Talib!”

“Go!” He could hear the sound of a door click close.

At least he could take time to piece together what exactly he had managed to do for himself. It all happened so fast that night. The real Hotan had used what was left of his spirit to seal up a majority of the Rebirth element within his mind. That move had caused the instability among other issues. He had grown afraid of his own powers, and now that they flowed through his body without limits, he understood why. It was like sharing your body with something alive and Godlike. His stomach turned as another thought surfaced.

Hotan was still in there, within my mind. He was still alive. When I unlocked the element, he shattered. I killed the last remnants of Talib’s true brother and in doing so, he died by my hand. How am I going to justify doing something so harsh? Was it even my place to take control of my own inheritance of the power with brute force? The fact of the matter is that two people cannot share the same mind and body. It was causing a dangerous issue that could have ended a million times worse.

He still could feel he was far from knowing how to use his own abilities, but there was one advantage he had gained. Any powers he had witnessed or been in contact with was now his own.

I can copy anyone’s abilities. That became very clear when Talib attempted to pull me out while I was hijacking Mr. Piedmont’s abilities. I may not master Rebirth ever, but at least I have a defense mechanism.

On top of that, he had sealed his mind. No more leaking his every thought to Geliah, and whoever else that had an open ear. That was a great relief. Another advantage he obtained was that he could feel when someone was using their abilities on him. No more wondering or fearing Geliah’s abilities being used to tweak his own behavior. At least this had freed him of the panic he felt in being able to confront both Geliah and Talib. He may even be able to distort more information with mastering this new copycat ability.

His body felt cold and dead to him. It was quite different from the fiery warmth the powers gave him when he released the white orb. It wasn’t the mild cold shiver that he had experienced after the church. Even his heart felt heavy with an icy dead sensation.

This was the risk that all of the Levites faced when overusing their ability. Lilly was so brave to even consider pushing herself to hard and enduring this lifeless sensation. Stamina was a very big factor and perhaps that came from their survival when they first inherited their abilities. Today, they have not endured such a physical test and it’s a dangerous issue in using the elements.

“I assume you are still awake.” Talib hadn’t left the room. “We need to talk.”

Hotan’s heart thudded hard, Well I can’t do much else.

How long was he going to be enduring talks with Talib.

“First off, what the hell were you thinking? You should have come to me.” His voice was sincere, this wasn’t the lecturing he had expected. “You could have killed someone else.”

I had to do something. I was leaking information! My mind was wide open for anyone to just waltz right in. I need all the help I can get and in any form. It felt like the right thing to do. Here we go again. I need to push information out of Talib if I can. I had no reason to come to you for permission to do anything. You’ve left me one time too many on the side, lacking information.

“Consider your experiment a full success then.” The words were bitter as they left his mouth. “You managed to take advantage of the situation. What exactly went on in there I have no idea. You obviously waved me to the side and came out with no help from me. Congratulations. You won.”

You could feel that, huh? Oh, if he could only shoot him a smirk! I could see and feel it unlike before. It was then that I realized it is my sole choice to allow it, manipulate it, or even throw it back. You were desperate, very desperate.

“You were sending large waves of energy out. You also had poor Mr. Piedmont’s arm in your grasp.” There was the infamous sigh again. “And let us not forget you have never expanded your powers out prior. Far as I could tell you were good as dead too.”

It’s not like anyone died. Mr. Piedmont is still alive and breathing as well as everyone else who was there. This was already getting annoying. Did you seriously come in here to lecture me against my will? I can’t even move or look at anything!

“Hotan.” His voice sounded awkward, breaking slightly. “Hotan died. Someone did die.”

You knew? You knew he was still there? There was only the sound of a slamming door. What have I done…

He could feel the sickening sensation that rolled itself into knots in his stomach. Talib had known this whole time his brother was there. No wonder he was having a hard time figuring out how to deal with the situation. How could anyone choose a stranger over your own brother?

He had made the call himself that night to clear his mind and body of the Old Hotan. Poor Talib has no chances of rescuing his brother. He was dead. He would never be able to answer anyone what happened that night. How could he ever justify killing off what was left of their beloved leader? He had made a selfish move with the full extent of his power. There has to be an answer among the information he absorbed from him to make this better. The new puzzle was how to open Pandora’s box and obtain the knowledge held within his soul.

Hotan cracked his eyes open. It took so much effort to do it. It felt like hours passed before he managed to blink out the blurry eyesight. Focusing slowly, he realized he was on his side. That had to be a good sign. How he had managed to do it was a wonder in itself, it took all he had to slightly shift his fingers.

After the overexposure of light coming from the window started to recede, he realized that someone was in the room with him. Her back was to him with a long loose braid of brown hair dangling down the back of her red dress. He barely could see her side profile, but she was sipping from a dainty teacup while staring out the window. Moreover, he was fully aware he was no longer colorblind. Everything greeted his eyes in a symphony of colors.

“Good afternoon.” Her coo was elegant and she didn’t move a muscle. “So sorry about Talib the other day.”

“…” No use in talking aloud, he still had a hard time moving his eyelids, let alone using his mouth and vocal cords. I should be the one apologizing. I should have at least let him know what I was going to attempt to do.

“I don’t blame you.” Her movements were quiet and smooth as she seated herself in the chair next to him. “Talib lost his brother years ago. All that remained was a broken shell that gave up on life after losing his wife. You needed answers and you went for it. I would have done the same. Honestly, I think we all would have taken the same path as you did, Hotan. Please do not let your guilt consume you with so many depending on your swift recovery.”

He took it hard. She was beautiful with her tall features and big hazel eyes. I had no idea that Hotan was still there. It was like just one last fragment of a puzzle long lost.

“Talib isn’t as hard as he used to be.” Her smile was comforting. “Centuries of being alone have done its share of damage to that wall he used to have. None of you knew that Talib was hiding the fact a small piece of his brother remained. Hotan should have let the process complete itself. If he had, we probably would have never woken up.”

I never thought of that fact. Pondering a moment on the concept, he finally realized she was right. In fact, if he had dissolved completely and I had acquired the power out right there would have never been instability of power. His power was the engine that kept the process of reincarnation going. The moment his abilities started fluctuating it lost its ebb and started choking itself out. It still leaves out to why he felt the need to do a partial rebirth.

“Ah, yes. You are right on that. Why would he even need to consider doing a rebirth of his being, is beyond us all.” Sighing she took another sip of her tea. “Just please don’t be too upset with Talib’s rant a few days ago. You have to understand he feels like the one to blame for this mess as well as other things.”

But, how could he stop any of it. Finally, he could sigh at the least! I practically killed his brother.

“Oh no,” Sitting her cup in its saucer on the table, she leaned close to his face, smiling the whole time. “He was more scared of losing you, my dear. You are so much like his brother before we were forced from our homes all those years ago. Talib had already come to terms with losing his brother, but losing you too, that would have been too much for him.”

Of losing me? He barely knew Talib, they were strangers, not even close to being friends. Why me?

“He’s known you far longer than you ever could imagine Hotan. I will never forget the day he said he discovered you.” She leaned back in her chair. Her gentle smile mesmerizing him as she continued. “He was walking the neighborhood where you and your mother lived. You were just a small thing then, but there was no doubt he knew who you were. He watched you intensely, but even that early on he knew there was something wrong. That you were different and that his true brother was missing.”

Why did he wait so long to show himself? If he cared so much, where was he when my mom died? I had no one, no one at all. He wanted to roll over and give her the cold shoulder, but he couldn’t get himself to budge. Why did he keep me in the dark on everything!

“I wish I knew.” Taking another sip of tea, she let her smile fade. “Only Talib knows why he decided to do things the way he did. Maybe he was afraid of pushing you away. He worked so hard to be there for his brother at every turn and it got him nowhere. He saw a second chance with you and tried doing the opposite, only to get nowhere again. Just be easy on him for me.”

Easier said than done you know. He’s edgier than I am these days. He managed another sigh, much to his relief. You’re Saphellia… his wife?

“Yes. It’s a pleasure to meet you face to face.” Gracefully she stood up and floated out of his view. “Get some rest. You’ll need to be back on your feet as soon as possible.”

Thank you for the information and talk. He closed his eyes feeling the exhaustion creep back into him. I’ll do my best not to give the old man a hard time.

“Thank you. Call me if you need anything.” The door closed and he let himself drift off once more.

Sleep is the only recovery.

Giggling brought Hotan swiftly out of his coma. It sounded like that of a small child. He could manage to open his eyes without a hard time, but it was dark. Nothing could be seen beyond his bed. He managed to tilt his head one way, then stiffly the other way to attempt to see if someone was in the room with him. He saw nothing. At least he was on his back, allowing him the freedom to look around. Taking in a deep breath and closing his eyes, he felt like a small kid again, afraid of the dark.

Sounds of books hitting the floor from a nearby shelf jerked him out of his peaceful regime. Another round of giggling followed as footsteps echoed playfully. Every tiny hair on his body could stand up.

What is going on?

It was like the basement all over again. It was no use; he couldn’t get his voice to come out at all. A moment of silence added to eerie atmosphere as Hotan felt imprisoned by his own body.

Who’s there?

He stared hard in the direction of the noise. It was so dark; he couldn’t see the door that lay in that direction. The chair behind him moaned. He was too slow to catch what was sitting there. At least he could make out the chair where Saphellia had sat in. He thought about the time Kyle could see in the dark. Concentrating he was hoping to recall that ability.

It’s pointless. My body can’t give me any room to use any powers.

His skin rippled with a chill as he felt something on the foot of the bed, walking towards his head. He spun around, panic engulfing his mind in his helpless state.

Oh, thank God…

Relief gushed over him as he watched a gray cat with yellow eyes approaching him. He felt like an idiot. Grinning, he looked the feline in the eyes as it sat down next to his head. It was a petite thing, as it silently sat there, possibly still young. Releasing a sigh, he closed his eyes.

I feel so stupid…

“Why?” Every nerve melted away as fears rushed back as the sound of the tiny voice. “Why do you feel so stupid?”

What in hell is going on! Who’s here! The cat hadn’t moved and as he looked about there was still no signs of anyone. The cat is blocking my view. They have to be by the door.

“Huh? By the door?” The cat turned about and looked in the direction he had been trying to look. “No. I don’t see anyone over there. Are you sure?”

The cat! It’s talking! Am I dreaming?

“Huh?” It turned back, nose-to-nose as it giggled like a kid. “Do you not like cats? I can be something different!”

What are you? He watched as the cat leaped from the bed. Who are you?

“I’m Abigail.” Once more giggling came from her direction. “Would you rather for me to be a bird?”

What do you want from me? A mourning dove landed on his chest. Why are you here?

“Normally I like to play games.” The bird twitched its head a few times then flew off into the dark out of sight. “But I understand you’re not in the best of shape.”

Obviously, since I haven’t been able to move a muscle despite how much you’ve startled me. His anger was starting to get to him. I never like it when I am being toyed with, and that still stands now. What are you, Abigail?

“Oh no! Don’t be mad with me.” She walked to the bedside, big blue eyes, golden hair that must have flowed to the floor in a curly mass as she revealed her true self. “I came to make you feel better! Honest!”

Make me feel better? He was still astonished over how pale skinned and angelic her form was. I am healing. There’s nothing to do. I need sleep. Are you some kind of shape shifter?

“Oh, there’s another way.” She grinned sheepishly at him, batting her eyes. “I am the Element of Body. I can change forms as well as control many aspects of the physical kind. Your poor body, what have you done to it? It’s so tired.”

I overused my powers. He watched as her smile faded and she lifted the back of his hand to her cheek, nuzzling it. I almost went too far, in fact. I think I have been in this bed a month. I have no way of tracking the time here. It seems when I sleep, it’s for days…

“I missed you around the apartment complex. My light bulb went out in the basement, you know.” She laid his hand down on his chest. “I enjoyed scurrying about and watching you work on everything. You’re so good at fixing things, Mr. Hotan. I haven’t had a chance to fly to the school and watch everyone there lately. It’s not worth going unless you’re going to be there too.”

Scurrying about? You’re the rat in the basement? The mourning dove I see all the time? Abigail was competing with Tina in the ballpark of insanity. So, I did hear giggling in the basement after all!

“Sorry if I spooked you. It’s so much fun being able to get from place to place traveling through the walls as a mouse or rat. You’d be so surprised of the things I find!” She clapped her hands gleefully. “I put them in the boxes there. Did you get the photo album? It had been thrown out, but the man in the pictures looked so much like you!”

The photo album had been tossed? You rescued it. The gold chain that he had pulled from that very album was still around his neck. Thank you, it meant a lot to me to have that.

“Oh, it’s nothing.” Snickering, she snuggled herself onto the bed against him, once more nose to nose with him. “But I need to fix you. I want one thing in return.”

What do you want? There was a catch after all. When will he ever be able to do something without a price to pay?

“Kiss me.” He almost didn’t hear her voice as he watched her eyes sadden and tear up. “Kiss me like a lover would.”

Kiss you? That’s a strange request, and rather awkward. What would Shellie think? I don’t understand why you want me to kiss you like, that?

“You have to understand. I was a small child when I became an immortal. Doomed forever to be a child.” Her depression hit him as her singsong voice dwindled. “I am trapped at this age for eternity. I have lived like this for over four thousand years, and I have always looked up to Hotan. Admired how handsome he was… and how you are too. I want to know how it would be, to be kissed like a lover. Not loved like the child I appear to be.”

I am so sorry Abigail. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she looked away from him. I am so sorry that you are stuck as a child for all this time. How horrible. I, I will do it, but you’ll have to do me a favor. If you want this as sincere as possible, I will have to ask you to change how you look for it. As horrible as that may sound, it’s the best way for me to make sure it’s sincere.

“You will?” She perked up looking back at him. “Anything! Anything to make it feel as real as possible!”

I need you to look like Shellie. He was kicking himself on the inside, but a month had passed. He had no clue if Shellie was ok out there with Geliah and Cassandra on the hunt. I need you to look like the girl I do love.

“Ok.” She walked off into the dark corner. “It seems only right. That way you are staying true to her. I will honor your request, Mr. Hotan.”

I hate to think what Shellie would do if she- His thoughts ceased as the Shellie look alike came to the side of the bed, including those wonderful emerald green eyes. My God, you... Not one detail missed.

“You think a lot about her. It wasn’t hard to hit all the details.” She was leaning over him, their lips close. The warmth from her begged his own lips to meet hers. “So sorry to ask this of you…”

I am the sorry one. Closing his eyes, he let his passion take over. Please forgive me Shellie.

He was missing Shellie terribly; it wasn’t hard to let his love take over. Allowing himself to drink-up the sight of the doppelganger Abigail. The warmth of her lips, the lonesome compassion that ebbed from her was overwhelming. She pulled away before he did, backing into the darkness, leaving him sitting there in bewilderment. His heart ached from the experience. Still stinging on his lips was her centuries of loneliness.

“Thank you.” It was clear that she was crying. “Thank you for being true to your end of the deal. You gave me much more than you should have.”

“It was only fair.” Clenching his fist in front of him, he was relieved to see he was moving with the greatest ease. “Thank you for healing me. I feel like I still owe you, this was quite the job to handle.”

“Talib has no idea how powerful I am.” Sniffling, a little girl came from the shadows with her black straight hair flowing to the floor and big brown eyes filling with large tears. “But I stay in the dark, trapped in the body of a small child forever. My body does not feel the effects of using my powers, for it is the advantage of my power. Thank you. Thank you for the lover’s kiss.”

“Abigail.” Vanishing before his eyes, she was gone. “I will find a way to fix it. I promise. Hotan may have neglected your condition, but I know rebirth can fix this for you. I can fix this for you… one day.”

Hotan sat there in the bed for hours it seemed.

Should I stay?

He started to pace the room, still shaken by his encounter with Abigail.

What a horrible fate.

The gifts of powers had come with a heavy price to them all. He too shared the pang of the poison as it destroyed his own way of life. They truly only have each other to depend on under the circumstances. He still couldn’t shake the sensation of her lips from his. What power she held to be able to use it in the way she had. He didn’t even feel it as it worked through his body. His love for Shellie had blinded him to it.

“Oh my,” Startled by the voice, he jerked up. “Well, that’s a surprise not to see you in bed!”

“Saphellia,” Hotan had fallen asleep in the chair at some point. “It’s just you…”

“Yes.” She stepped over the fallen books that scattered across the floor. “I can’t decide if I should ask you how you healed over night or to ask what on earth was wrong with my books being on the shelf.”

“Luckily, I have one answer for both.” Rubbing the sleep from his face, he was avoiding eye contact with her like the plague. In the back of his mind he was still feeling ashamed of the lustful kiss still felt on his lips. “Abigail was here last night.”

“Abigail?” He heard the clatter of her teacup on its saucer. “It’s been ages since anyone has seen her. Are you sure?”

“No mistaking it. Shape shifting element of Body. She was kind enough to heal me.” He pulled himself up and out of the chair. Stretching, avoiding facing her directly. “Amazing she was able to do this much healing and not break a sweat.”

“And what did she want?” Sipping her tea, he could feel the stare burn through him. “She still thinks like a child at times. She always wants to trade. It’s her curse; an immortal that loses to the childish tendencies her body pushes onto her.”

“It was nothing,” He could feel his face flush with heat. “Just a kiss.”

“Ah, that’s right, I remember now. She always crushed over Hotan.” Her laugh released his tension. “Well, that was a small payment for such a big job, for sure. Shocked you are still here then. I would take you for one to run off the moment your feet were working.”

“Normally I would.” He flopped down on the edge of the bed, sitting there staring out the open door. “But, I have no idea where here is. Plus, I decided to get in some rest while I still could. Start fresh during the day.”

“I’m glad you stayed.” She finished the last of the tea in her cup and placed it on the windowsill. “Let’s get going in that case. I am sure you need a ride home and have things to tend to after being here for so long.”

“But what about Talib?” Standing up he followed her out the door and down the large hallway. Her long brown braid swung side to side against her slender back. “Won’t he be mad about me leaving? About you taking me home so suddenly? Plus, I think we need to talk about what exactly happened.”

“Talib knows where to find you if need be.” She held a door open, leading him into a rather large kitchen. “Plus he’s coming with us.”

“He’s coming with us?” The words fumbled out of his mouth. “Are you sure about that too?”

“How are you walking?” Talib’s voice cut the air, catching Hotan’s attention. “What is going on? You were still coming in and out of heavy sleep?”

“Abigail was here.” Saphellia pushed pass him, kissing Talib on the cheek. Grabbing a set of keys from the table in front of him, she went about her agenda. “How wonderful of her to help him heal, don’t you think, dear?”

“Abigail has been lost for centuries!” Hotan jumped at the clanking of the coffee cup as it splashed steaming coffee across the table. “She was the only one I could not track. She never took on the same form. Far as I knew, she was a bird half a dozen times! Or someone’s pet!”

“Let’s go.” He couldn’t help but admire how Saphellia blew passed the reaction and went about floating out the door. “Let’s get this poor kid home for the time being.”

“Where did you find her?” Chills ran down his neck at Talib’s intense glare. “You must have found her and failed to let me know.”

“Look! I have no idea where she came from! All I know is she scared the shit out of me last night.” He billowed back at Talib, having no patience for his condescending tone. “I thought I was losing my mind when a cat appeared and started giggling, talking to me! Imagine how I felt!”

“A cat?” There was a moment of silence as they stared each other down and finally, Talib started to laugh. “A cat huh?”

“Yea, a talking cat.” Blinking he couldn’t get over the sight of seeing a smile across Talib’s face. “I wasn’t sure what was going on when she woke me up in the dead of the night.”

“I guess I cannot blame you for the mischief of a little girl.” It was a relief to feel the tension break between them as he ventured to the door. “Go on. I will follow you out in a moment, I want to finish my coffee first.”

“Ok.” Talib was actually smiling and laughing.

“I told you he liked you. He really does care,” Saphellia winked at Hotan as he slid into the back seat of the compact car. “And scared too. I don’t think you’ll ever know how relieved that man is to see you walk out of that room on your own accord. He didn’t think you would recover fully from your little stunt a month ago.”

“He was probably right to think that. From how my body felt, I was going to be down for a long time.” Sighing, he pumped his fist, marveling over the fact there was no clues to the cold and heavy sensation that had hobbled him the night before. “Is it always so cold and dead feeling when you exert too much power?”

“…yes.” He could hear her breathing change at the thought. “It is quite the opposite of what you feel when using your power. For you it’s a new sensation all around. For us, we have never known the freezing sensation until now. Deep down we are all afraid of going too far and not knowing until it’s too late. We were never limited before and it terrifies many of us.”

“Has anyone died from it?” Staring hard at the back of her head, he saw her shoulders slump.

“Not to our knowledge. The worst case we’ve seen, was me. I had gotten myself in a bad situation. I found myself falling off a building, and by the grace of God somehow awakened in time to save myself. But at a heavy price.”

“From falling?” His eyes widened as she told her story. “How? How did you save yourself?”

“I am Wind. I managed to call upon it to catch my fall. The sudden large expulsion of the full extent of my power put me into a deep coma.” She turned and the heat of her glare hit his soul with a terrible grief. “I woke up roughly five months ago. To be exact, when your power peaked for the first time. When you released the first wave in the Cathedral, I came soaring out of my 80-year-old coma. Otherwise, I would still be in that very same bed you found yourself in.”

What could he possibly say to that? It was clear how lucky he was to be awake, let alone walking. Her rigid, slender face made sure to demand that he realize the seriousness of what he was capable of doing. His power affected everyone. It did not matter if he was directing it at them or not. Train wrecks on top of train wrecks had been going on this whole time because of his powers being in limbo. Talib had too much thrown at him in such a short time. He felt ashamed and selfish for not realizing how they were right there with him, riding the coattails of disaster. Every day all they could do was watch their world fall apart.

Breaking from the silent understanding, they sat there, lost in their own boiling pots of emotions. The old Hotan had really turned their world upside down. This whole time he was upset with his life being a mess when these poor people, for centuries, have been tormented. Especially Talib.

I couldn’t imagine watching Shellie in a coma for 80 years. Talib I am sorry. I had no idea.

Let us move on then. The car door opened and Talib shot him a quick look. “We need to get you home. I am sure Shellie and a few others are worried about you.”

“Thanks.” The car ride was agonizingly quiet. Hotan had lost his need for seeking out information from Talib.

“You said a while, but over a month?” Worry didn’t even describe the look on Shellie’s face as she held back tears of relief. “Over a month! Your bike was there, no one home, no signs of you anywhere! Then when you missed our shows at 7even’s, I started panicking!”

“I’m sorry, Shellie.” All he could think of was to hug her. “I am so sorry. It didn’t go as planned. I’m lucky to even be back this soon.”

“I was so scared.” Her body jolted as she started crying. “What exactly happened to you?”

“If I could tell you, I would.” Pain and sorrow filled him as he held her tight, still feeling the guilt from kissing Abigail. “It’s done and over with. For now I can take some time to heal.”

“Heal? How badly were you hurt?” Her green eyes were so wonderful to see. “Hotan, you can’t be serious? You’re going to kill yourself going on like this.”

“It’s complicated.” Her peachy skin, her brown hair that gave a shimmer of red in the sunlight, her rosy lips; he was seeing her fully with no fears of it fading away. “Let’s just say, I am feeling better about my situation. The best part, I’m no longer color blind.”

“No longer?” His lips pressed hard against hers.

The warmth of her made his heart whirl. After being in that horrible cold dead sensation, he had grown to enjoy the warmth. She pulled back as she wiped the last of her tears on her sleeve. Regaining her composure, she managed a smile. “I wasn’t alone in my struggle this time. If I had tried this alone, I wouldn’t be here with you. That much I am sure of.”

“You can see color, you say.” Amused, she looked intensely into his silver eyes. “Then what does my shirt look like.”

“It’s green with red stripes.” Watching her eyes widen, he couldn’t help but smile. “And your watch is blue, and the house is a pinkish color, it looks like a conch shell. What a horrible color for a house.”

“How on earth were you able to-” She couldn’t find the words to ask. “Will I ever know what happened to you this past month?”

“No. I don’t even want to think about it. All that matters is I’m back. I want to take some time to focus on my life for a change. I learned a valuable lesson, not to rush things, and I plan to slow down. How did you guys manage without me at 7even’s?”

“Well, we got lucky. Hisota showed every night and with Metsy helping, we were able to put on a decent show. Still was lacking, didn’t do many of our usual songs. We all agreed there are just some that you sing we couldn’t possibly do even half as well.” She came in for another hug. “We’ve all been so worried about you! Kyle insisted that he had heard from you and you would be back soon.”

“Sounds like you were the most worried about me.” Sighing, he kissed her passionately again. His heart ached to have to break the moment. “I am heading home. I need to get some rest but I will see you tomorrow, Shellie. Love you”

“See you tomorrow.” With one more squeeze she reluctantly let him go. Hearing the exhaustion in his voice, she knew he needed the rest. “I love you too.”

It was nice being in his apartment again. Small, quiet and dark. It was just as he had left it over a month ago. Dropping onto his couch, he stared up at the ceiling as he mulled over all the information he had obtained. There was so much to consider and he now realized how much his power affected the others. Chills crawled across his skin. He was pulling the strings and jerking others in several directions.

Hotan must have known he was able to do this, but he lacked the will power to move past losing his family. This had to be what started this mess.

Rubbing the cold sensation back out of his arms, he sat back up, staring at the photo album on the table. Abigail had retrieved it from the trash. He was never to see that album, but by pure luck he was able to have something of his mother’s. The dainty necklace and charm he wore made itself known to him constantly. Pulling it out of his shirt, he looked it over. She had even thrown it out, but he remembered at one point she had worn it religiously. The only thing he had of his mother’s was the necklace. It was also a constant reminder of who had broken her. The nameless father who smiled so smugly in all the photos fueled his hatred for the ruined lives they had lived.

What have you done? Immediately he knew he was hearing Callan. What have you started?

It’s been a while since we last spoke. Lugging himself off the couch, he started the shower, hot water blazing. I’ve managed to get my power under control.

Geliah is pissed. The voice sounded shaken. He’s tearing the place apart. He’s been unable to track you for a few weeks now.

And that’s bad? He jerked his shirt off, freeing himself from clothes he had been wearing for God knows how long. I needed to seal the leaks and I guess he noticed. Good.

Be careful, he will not keep his promise. Staring at himself in the mirror as he listened to Callan’s words, he knew what that promise was. The same one that Talib refused to tell him about months ago.

He wasn’t planning to wait a year anyway. At least he could recall that night in the church. He had been able to recover that much from releasing Hotan’s hold on his mind. I’ll have to take it one-step at a time.

He knows about the girl. Do not underestimate him in terms of using those around you to his advantage. Hotan could feel the desperation. Callan was trying to make him feel the trepidation involved. I am stuck here. I want out, but I am afraid I am far too weak. I can’t get pass his ability to control my own fears. At least I can be your eyes when I am able to push passed his hold on me.

I’m sorry. Hang in there, this can’t continue much longer. He finally broke his gaze from his own reflection and embraced the hot water that beat upon his head and muscles. I will get you out of there.

So many of them needed his help and he barely knew what he could do. He didn’t even know what started the whole mess exactly. His body relished the hot water. He never wanted to feel that close to death again. It was like being trapped in a cold husk, with no way out.

If it wasn’t for Abigail, I would still be there.

He was lucky to be conscious. Saphellia was proof that he should have been completely unreachable, comatose to the world and those around him for eternity. She had spent 80 years like that, with only Talib nurturing and watching her all that time.

It was clear to him now, that Talib was the one suffering most of all. Saphellia naturally could see it better than everyone else what Talib was feeling and thinking. He was broken, heart and soul. Dealing with all this chaos and this last leg of the race proved too much for him. Talib was shutting down and closing the doors to everyone despite the situation that lay in front of them. His judgment had been compromised, just as Hotan’s leadership was all those centuries ago. Mistakes proved most devastating.

He abruptly shut the water off, arms out and pushing against the tiled wall as he watched the last of the water go down the drain. He had a lot riding on his shoulders.

Hotan was right to fear making any mistakes. It cost him everything and if I’m not cautious, I will suffer the same fate.

Being down a month was a mistake, but he could only hope that what he was able to do that night truly did something good. He was at least able to defend himself and communicate with ease.

I have learned so much. Tomorrow I will sit and talk with Talib. Worse, I am now their leader, more blind than the old Hotan ever was all his life.

Chapter Twenty

“Hello there, my son.” It was the first time he had seen a priest in the Cathedral. “How may the Lord help you? Is there anything I can do for you?”

“I’m actually looking for Talib.” Hotan eyed the man carefully; there was something about him, almost a faint radiance coming from his very being. “He said I could find him here. He does know I am coming.”

“Ah, yes, he is in the back. I will go get him.” There was no need for the three steps he had made. “Oh, he must have felt your presence.”

“Thank you for tending to the visitors, Lucius.” Talib exchanged a bowed head with the blonde priest. “It helps make it look legitimate.”

“Nice touch.” He watched the priest, something seemed odd, but his body was saying it was familiar. “Who is that? He seems, off.”

“He is Lucius. He is the element of Light.” The door echoed as it closed behind the priest in the back of the Cathedral. “Do you remember him somehow?”

“No. I just had this overwhelming sensation. I feel like I have a type of built-in radar but haven’t learned how to use it.” He sat on the pew, sliding over for Talib to sit. “Every nerve in my body wanted to shout the answer, but I have no way of knowing otherwise. I did not get any memories from your brother. Those were his to keep I suppose.”

“I was hoping some information would transfer to you. I guess that was asking for too much.” Talib was still standing in the aisle way, his eyes distant and sad. “What do you need from me? You said you had some questions that you wanted to ask me in person.”

“I wanted to find out some history. The book talks about the timeframe and where you came from, but after that, nothing.” Rubbing the back of his neck, staring at Talib as he tried to be as sincere as possible. “In fact, I have no idea when you went into watcher mode and no clue when the first one woke up. I know you might have covered some of it before but, now you have my full attention. There’s no more questioning if this is real.”

“I imagine that does leave a lot of unanswered questions.” To Hotan’s relief he sat down next to him. “Are you familiar with the Bible?”

“Sort of,” He hadn’t spent very much time in church, let alone reading the Bible. “I know about Adam and Eve, Moses, Noah, and stuff?”

“Well, that is a good start. When Moses came to the new land, thirteen tribes were separated and laid out across the land. Israel, to give you an idea of what part of the world we are from, would be close to where we lived. Our tribe was the smallest, but we were given a small lot of land that happened to produce strong animals and an abundance of food. On top of that we were promised the tenth firstborn child from the other tribes to ensure we prospered and continue to produce priests and diplomats. In the end, there were three fates given to our people, the Levites.” A sigh of remorse escaped his lips as he paused a moment. “Immortality, death, or enslavement. We are labeled in the scripture as the Levites, slaves that tended to the Tabernacle for the other tribes. It says so in every Bible there is now.”

“It must be sad to see yourselves written out of history.” Staring into Talib’s silver eyes, he knew deep down there was no deception to his story. “But the few of you that escaped made it to an island. That’s where you became immortal, right?”

“Yes, we called it Nirvana or Eden. My brother was in a deep depression after that point. He never regained himself despite all my efforts to soothe his heart.” There was no denying how much he cared for his brother as he stiffened and continued to answer him. “When we left we were hoping to show our forgiveness towards the kin of our debtors and trespassers. We split off and traveled the world far and wide. We attempted to teach good and better the lives of our fellow man. Instead, we only found heartbreak. The world was soaking in greed and corruption. Lives cursed for generations for the sins they had committed in the time we had been gone.”

“For every good man there seems to be a three bad ones behind them.” Flashes of his father’s pictures and Geliah crossed his mind. “It just sucks that it works that way, one bad apple to spoil the bunch.”

“Yes, all we accomplished was teaching them better ways to hurt one another. Many wars broke out. For every good deed, there were five sins to follow. We decided that we were speeding up the destruction of mankind. For the first time in hundreds of years, my brother spoke up. He purposed an endless cycle of reincarnation. We all agreed, except Geliah. I distorted his judgment to support my brother’s will. That was my first mistake in a long line of misjudgments. My brother’s despair had infected me and after that point it became my obsession to uncover his wrong doing.”

“Hotan had stopped leading that whole time until that point? Where was he last before you met up? Where did he spend most of his time? Something must have happened during that time while everyone was under the spell. I have a feeling whatever started this, started with him, not you. He was hiding something. He made it very clear he had done something sinful with his power. I haven’t figured out what it was, but it led to a lot of deaths.”

“Yes, I suppose it did all start with him. He had taken a vow of silence before we left Eden. He was in Greece for some time and then traveled to Japan. He spent a long time in both places, living as a hermit. He was the only one who did not attempt to help anyone.” He could see Talib thinking long and hard for a moment. “Something had startled him back on the island and he never revealed it to me. I assumed it was something dealing with his power, but he locked that away deep in his mind. Being his brother all this time, he never said a word. He just had that deep lost look in his eyes, and then there was only fear.”

Hotan had spent months digging through history books. He couldn’t find anything. Many folklores and myths caught his attention, but nothing that could be factual. Desperately hoping for a clue, he wanted to be able to find a hint written down somewhere about them, more so about Hotan. There were too many possibilities. Considering their abilities, a lot of technological advances, early medieval time’s improvements, alchemy, all screamed that they had a hand in it. It helped that Fae had agreed to help him search through everything.

Talib had revealed to him that Fae, the element of Intelligence, had been the first to awaken in the 16th century. It was startling to discover the reincarnation had lasted for approximately a thousand years when her abilities awakened. Talib had described how when she became aware it was like a pin dropping in the dead silence. She had gotten herself in quite the mess when Talib had found her. The Spanish Inquisition had hit her village and she hadn’t held her tongue. Fae was quickly labeled a witch; slipping in and out of comas in attempts to save herself using her power had only made her appear as if she were possessed.

Hotan was waiting for her there in the library. Frustration was getting to him as he flipped through yet another book in hopes of some clue, something would pop out to him. It was musky there at the table deep in the library. He grinned at himself as he recalled the face of the librarian upon seeing him again. She had immediately looked behind him to see if Kyle was there. Amazing he had made that much of an impression on her. Then again, who could have ignored his loud, crude behavior?

“I still cannot get over how much you look like him.” Fae’s voice surprised him. He looked up at the woman, with her copper framed glasses perched upon her nose, brown hair in a bun and a stack of books in arms. “You need to be careful not to get yourself too absorbed into something.”

“Fae, right?” He watched her sit down and smooth out her black pencil skirt. “You look familiar.”

“I hope so. You passed me in the bookshelves a few months ago when you were last here. I’ve been here this whole time.” Separating her books across the table, she gave him a coy smirk. “Like I said though, you should have noticed me approaching, but you had engrossed yourself into the book.”

“You’re right, is that normal? If we concentrate too much on something we become blind to everything else?” She seemed meticulous about the books and counted them twice. “Lucius I sensed, but I had given him my attention.”

“Unfortunately, it is one of our downfalls next to exhausting our bodies. It is also a new issue we have inherited.” Sighing with satisfaction, she stopped her work with her books and gave him her attention. “I have done some research and with what I could see Hotan was staying low. Nothing could be seen in the books that could be Hotan’s doing.”

“I had no luck either.” Leaning back in his chair, he couldn’t help but feel he had wasted his time again. “Nothing that I saw caught my attention in anyway.”

“I did, however, find where many of us had influenced cultures. I was able to confirm it with those I contacted in their whereabouts during those decades. There were some cultures that had beliefs and stories that I could trace to before we left the Island as well.” Leaning in closer, she clasped her hands together and cleared her throat. “But I found some very odd information. Events similar to the ones we had made both intentionally and by mistake. Only problem, it was none of us.”

“None of you? Then it had to be Hotan.” Something stirred in the depths of his mind. “But I think, I think you may have found the clue I was looking for.”

“Hotan’s powers had remained undetectable until you came along, mon cher. After talking to Talib though, I was able to confirm something odd. These events end in high death and destruction. Anything from mass wars to entire colonies turning up missing or dead. It started before we arrived back to the homelands and more disturbingly, continued while we were all under the spell.” Her eyes commanded him to take in her next words. “But Hotan was sighted in the area just before, always leaving moments before the destruction. It was as if he were running away from something. Whatever or whoever it is, was slipping under Talib’s radar.”

“Something was hunting him down. You think it was Geliah?” He refused to break the connection with her elegant dark blue eyes. “Or was he not awake for the majority of this either?”

“Oui, he has only been awake in the last 50 years. He was a body builder, which gave him the advantage he has in having stamina to use his power; his body trained for high endurance. I have no idea if it’s a person or something demonic that was chasing Hotan. I am sorry.” The muscles in her cheeks twitched. “I don’t think it’s gone either. I think it’s still looking for him, perhaps another immortal that’s not one of us? In all our years, we have never seen anything that would reflect the myths and folklores time has painted. Demons and such do not exist, but here we are. Perhaps this immortal has a tendency for doing the world harm.”

“My power and looks make it so I am the original Hotan, essentially, just a different soul. If this thing is still looking for him than I am sure my latest stunt has given it a clear sight where to find me.” Every muscle in his body strained, aching as they did so. “We will find out soon enough what we are dealing with. I released a beacon and it’s only a matter of time before it reveals itself to me.”

“I am afraid so.” The air about them was grim as they boiled over the information. “Please remember you are not alone. We will help you in any way we can and here for you, mon petit.”

“Thanks.” Standing up he nodded his goodbye to her. “Thank you for the information. I assume I can find you here at any time?”

“Oui, I am always here night or day.” She nodded her goodbye, finishing with her graceful French. “S’il vous plait soyez prudent.” Please be careful.

Hotan had one more stop to make before meeting everyone at 7even’s. He had missed every show and the Battle of the Bands was a couple of weeks away. At least he owed it to the others for one last round of being part of the band before giving up his dream. There would be no use in keeping such a public dream due to the current circumstances. A lot of things would have to change in his life. Being immortal had its limitations and need for concealment.

He had parked behind 7even’s and walked to Tina’s bookstore. Hotan could feel the tingling sensation as he neared the little store. It would take him some time to get used to using his new ability to sense and hone in on who was who. As of right now, it all felt the same to him. Worse, he had to be careful not to get distracted by what’s going on. If he let his attention stray too far one way or the other. Doing so could cause him not to be able to notice anything.

“Hotan,” Tina’s voice echoed through the stale bookstore as he walked in. “You’re alone now, so lonely.”

“I was always alone.” Once more, he couldn’t see Tina anywhere. Then again, who could make out anything among the clutter, dust and cobwebs that filled the tiny store. “Where are you?”

“You had a friend in there, in your head.” Books fell from a mountainous stack in the center aisle way and she came crawling over them. Stopping at the floor, lying on her back, she grinned up at him. “Where did he go, the man in the shiny ball?”

“He went away.” Having no patience for where her conversation was leading, he laid the book on her counter along with a large bag of chocolates. “Here. I’m done with this book for now. As promised I brought chocolate.”

“Chocolate!” Hugging herself as she rocked on the floor, she looked beyond happy. “Bye-Bye, Mr. Hotan.”

He didn’t give her any chance to talk any more than that. She had hit a sour note by mentioning she was aware of the fact the Old Hotan was sitting there. Huddled inside his mind’s depths, he felt ignorant that even she had felt it there. In fact, it took all his patience to hold back the flood of anger that wanted to push pass and spill forward. The element of Insanity had known about the issue but never spoke of it. Why did he have to be the last one to find out and destroy him? What good did it do leaving him out of the loop on that very important detail?

Nearing the club, he started to pick up the tingling sensation again.

Kyle must be here already.

He hadn’t seen or talked to him since he had been back on his feet. At least everyone had given him room to recover. As he passed the locker rooms, the hairs on his arms felt like they were standing on end. He wasn’t just feeling one immortal but two. He paused, trying to hold the panic at bay as thoughts of Cassandra or Geliah invaded his thoughts.

No, this wasn’t a threat, but who else do I know that is an immortal? Jake? Who else is here?

He let his mind reach out as far as he felt the energies. He was getting better at being able to block everyone but who he wanted to talk to.

It’s safe. I promise, come out and see if you can tell who it is. Kyle’s answer was reassuring, allowing his tension to recede some as he continued out onto the stage with his guitar.

“Oh! Look here!” Hisota was quick on the draw as Hotan walked up to them. “I was wondering if you were part of the band anymore!”

“I could have said the same about you months ago.” Searching, he went from person to person; eager to see if he could figure out whom the other immortal was in the group of familiar faces. “At least my excuse was for health issues. You just didn’t show.”

“All right, I’ll back off this time.” Scoffing Hisota pulled a curly, black haired girl to his side tightly. “By the way, this is Charlotte.”

“Nice to meet you,” Waving slightly as he took into account of everyone there; Shellie, Kyle, Hisota, Charlotte and then there is, “Metsy.”

“Oh, hey there, Hotan! Sorry I was busy fixing my bass’ case.” She was squatting behind everyone, on the floor with some purple duct tape. “I somehow managed to bust open this one corner and it’s driving me crazy. Luckily, I always carry purple duct tape with me. Never know.”

It’s you, isn’t it. I can feel it strongest in your direction when I focus on you. The smirk took its place on his face as he came over and squatted next to her to assess the damage. “Need help?”

I’m so sorry. I should have said something sooner but, well. Her smile was warming and genuine. “I got it. Thank you.” We were hoping you’d wake up, sorry about this mess.

Its ok, I understand. Standing up, he turned his attention to everyone else on the stage. “Let’s get this show back on track. I have a new song I want to sing tonight. If you don’t mind, Perfect Circle’s The Noose. It’s slow, but I am in the mood for something that’s steady, even a little dark. I’m sure Kyle wouldn’t mind doing it.”

“It’s cool with me, man.” A wink went out as Kyle’s green eyes glowed. “At least I get to lead the beat on that one! It’s gloomy and slow, but you’re the boss.”

There had been no signs of Cassandra or Geliah. It was making him nervous. All he had heard was a few moments of Callan expressing warning or that Geliah was fuming with rage. All he could do was keep an eye and ear open for any signs of them. Hotan was more concerned about Shellie, whether he would target her. He stayed close to her and spent as much time with her as he could. There was no sure way to tell how much longer he could keep their relationship going with everything riding on his shoulders and screaming in his ears of danger. Let alone the complications of being immortal.

Shellie became more like a band manager. She came to every practice as she adjusted equipment. Having a set of ears with the only task of listening and critiquing had been a big help. If it sounded off at any point, it could cost them the chance to make it to the last round. This was the least he could do for everyone, one last round of playing with them and a chance to see how far they could go, for old time’s sake. It was going to be the final chapter of his normal life. A life that his destiny would have never allowed him to have in the end.

The event was in full swing as they came through the back doors, flashing their badges. They had gotten the call of making it to this round while Hotan had been away, and now it was time to showcase what they could do. Hordes of people had showed to the event. The energy that the sold out show brought was intoxicating and exciting. At least his final goodbye to a mortal life would give him a moment of feeling like a rock star.

At least this is a worthy last moment for me.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay back stage with us?” Kyle was pleading with Shellie among the hustle and bustle of people carrying band equipment. “It’s no fun to play up here if I can’t hug you right after the performance.”

“No, I want to see what the audience sees.” Shellie chuckled as she gave Kyle a hug. “Plus, you’re always sweaty after every song. That’s the grossest hug ever.”

“Shellie, just be careful.” Hotan was adjusting the strap on his guitar as he watched her finish her hug with Kyle. Kyle and he exchanged the same worried expression with each other. “You said you’ll be up front, right?”

“Yes, don’t worry so much!” She rushed over and kissed him on the cheek. “Good luck, I will be front and center.”

“All right, Shellie.” He grabbed her arm, swinging her back to him and gave her a kiss on the lips. “That’s better, I feel luckier after that one.”

“Oh! They said that we’re next!” Metsy was on the other side of the backstage crowd waving her arm high up to gain attention. “Get ready!”

“See you out there!” Shellie rushed off out of view, disappearing in the crowd.

“You think she’ll be ok out there?” Kyle shot him a serious look. “We aren’t sure where Geliah is, but with this commotion we’re all going to have a hard time sensing him.”

“It’s probably safer for her to be there in the middle of a crowd.” He sighed as he watched Hisota flirt discreetly with Charlotte in a dark corner. Unlike them, he hadn’t a worry in the world. “Plus there’s too much going on around here for anyone to notice what someone else is doing. It’ll be for the best. I can relax if she is out there and not alone back here.”

“That’s true. Thank you by the way.” Kyle was watching the couple as they laughed and whispered into each other’s ears. “It’s nice to have this as a farewell to a mortal way of living. It means a lot to me too.”

“I didn’t know it meant that much to you. It was my dream, but I suppose for you to have been here so religiously, you must have felt just as attached.” Never did it cross his mind that this last chronicle was more than about him. “I was doing it purely for my own selfish reasons to be honest, Kyle.”

“I know that.” Once more an encouraging smile and pat on the back. “But that doesn’t mean we feel that way too. We are all envious of the lives that flow with the tide of time.”

Metsy had made it across the way. Compared to the other bands, their group looked like they had plucked people from a hat at random. Hotan always had that grunge look going, Kyle the punk rocker, Hisota the preppy boy-band singer, and now Metsy in her Gothic punk style. By the time they peeled Hisota away from Charlotte, the red light to indicate staging had come on and they were scrambling for the stage.

For their first song, they had chosen to sing So Cold by Breaking Benjamin. It had a good slow start that quickly sped up. In addition, he had always loved the lyrics to the song, making it easier for him to get into the music.

This is my goodbye to my childish dreams. To the mortal life I was lousy at living anyhow…

As he looked across the crowd, he was able to spot Shellie. Front and center as promised. She was right there next to security, which made him feel better. If anyone tried to take her against her will it would be noticeable. He focused back onto the music as he bounced across the stage, walking over to Metsy as they grinned ear to ear. There was so much excitement on the stage and it tingled across them all, including the audience. Clearly, Metsy was using her ability to make sure this was a good time, increasing the spirit across the area.

Amazing to think someone could persuade even this sensation in people.

It was a wonderful feeling when one of the stagehands came over to them and informed them they were going into the second round. It was starting to be less crowded backstage as bands were being told sorry and sent home or at least out of the backstage area. He walked over to another stagehand who pointed him over to a table off the side next to the stage entrance.

“Hey, I was wondering who else made it to the second round.” The curly haired girl pushed up her glasses as she looked up; it was the receptionist from the radio station. “Now that there are less people back here, I figured it would be worth my time to see who was who. Get a feel for what I’m up against.”

“Yea, no problem! I was just printing out the list.” She handed him a paper from the printer and went back to work on her laptop. “Good luck!”

“Thanks.” Hotan walked away, heading towards the rest of the band, when he froze, his eyes reading one of the lines twice. “He’s here.”

What’s wrong? It was Kyle; he was watching him from far off. Are you okay?

Geliah is here. Searching from one end to the other he looked for any sign of Geliah. He’s here, apparently with his very own band. They are on the second round list, Geliah, Cassie, and Callan. There’s no mistaking that.

How did we miss all three of them? Kyle sounded as alarmed as he did. Good thing Shellie is out in the crowd and not back here then.

Let’s hope so. They spent the next several minutes trying to spot any signs of the three, but there were none to be found.

The second round was moving much faster than the first. There were still no signs of Geliah or Cassandra in all the commotion that was still going on, despite there being half as many bands. He wasn’t worried about Callan, but he was worried about Shellie’s safety. He couldn’t get his nerves to lay flat knowing that the three of them had slipped in under even Kyle and Metsy’s radar. All they could do is stay on high alert while at least finishing the task in front of them.

Once more, the stage light beamed red and it was their turn again. Sweat was already trickling down his temple as they walked out. His heart stopped, Shellie was gone. Her spot empty, almost as if she was still there. Frantically he searched the crowd, but the twisting in his stomach told him what he already knew. Geliah had found what he was looking for.

Without hesitation, he threw his guitar to the ground, the neck snapping in half from the forceful shove against the stage floor. Kyle had run out ahead of him in his moment of panic, long out of his sight. All he could do was thank his luck. Losing the old Kyle and having a braver one in his place was already proving its weight in gold. All he could think was to head for the alleyway out back. That’s where he sensed Kyle had gone. Metsy was right behind him before being caught by the stage manager demanding answers for the odd reaction.

As he burst through the door, he caught sight of a column of earth slamming Kyle against the brick building across from where he stood. Flames distinguished as he fell to the ground with a sickening thud. Hotan wasn’t sure if he was dead or passed out. Cassandra was standing not far from his right. She was laughing. Her short choppy hair bounced around her face, knee-high leather boots and a provocative mini skirt complete with the strapless top only added to her villain persona. He quickly jumped over the railing running for the heap on the ground, hoping Kyle was at least alive.

Much to his relief he was breathing, but cold and clammy feeling. He had over exerted himself. Standing, he turned his full attention to Cassandra as she smiled wildly. Her dark red lips and black eyes danced as flames from a nearby trash heap whipped high into the air. Her tattoo spotted her skin and she was glowing in a faint blue. They had gone out of their way to regain their endurance in order to use their powers like this.

“What’s wrong, kid? You look like you’re missing something?” She was slowly walking towards him. The ground beneath him was quivering and rumbling. “Maybe she’ll enjoy her date with Geliah.”

“Where is she?” Heat was rising within him as his feelings about Shellie and Kyle boiled up. “I refuse to let you get away with hurting Kyle, and you’ll pay for taking Shellie.”

“Big words from a little punk that can’t use his powers.” Her left arm lifted up and he could feel his feet go with it. “I was told not to kill you, but I’m going to have some fun first.”

Hotan realized that the ground beneath him swept away. Right out from under him like a rug. He scrambled back to his feet, only to see a large column, larger than what had hit Kyle, coming right at him. All he could do in his fright was to close his eyes and prepare for what was flying at him. His ears could hear the rumbling pile of dirt and then something caught his attention. He could hear a motorcycle and it was speeding in their direction. The sound had interrupted the momentum of the wall of earth before it could reach him.

Opening his eyes, he watched Hisota slide his bike across the ground. He flung himself from it, rolling off to the side and sending the motorcycle skipping across the ground right at Cassandra. Her column of dirt retracted from its current path and blocked what it could of the surprise attack. Knowing he had no time, Hotan ran straight at Cassandra. She was panting and he could see that she was at her limit as she struggled to keep her glow about her. Tackling her to the ground, he hit her with the force of a bus. Her head hit the asphalt as they slammed into the ground. There was no room to be soft at this point.

Jumping to his feet, but was relieved to see she had passed out, whether from exertion or the smack to the head, Hotan wasn’t sure. He jogged over to where he saw Hisota roll away, but as he turned around, he was limping towards him. Grinning despite having to hold his injured arm, they were happy to see each other safe. There was never a time Hotan thought he would see Hisota risk himself for anyone, and here he had proven him wrong. He had even sacrificed his bike. It pained him to know he was so wrong about him.

“Are you ok?” Hotan looked at him wide-eyed as he looked over the scraps and cuts Hisota wore from his moment of bravery. “I can’t believe you did that!”

“Heh,” Hisota eyed Cassandra on the ground. “Who or what the hell is she?”

“It’s a long story.” He walked back to Kyle, propping him up against the wall. “Any chance you saw Shellie?”

“No, why?” Hisota was tapping Cassandra with his foot who only managed to moan in response. “Good, she’s out cold.”

“They took her,” Satisfied at how Kyle was doing he started marching towards his bike, passing Hisota. “And I am going to get her back.”

“Have you lost your mind?” He hobbled behind him. “Hotan I just saw this chick move dirt like something out of a sci-fi movie! You can’t be serious!”

“You don’t understand. If I don’t go he will kill her. He wants me, nothing else.” Sirens were screaming in the background. “Look, stay here. Make sure Kyle gets help. Metsy must’ve called Jacob for back up. Tell them I went to the Cathedral.”

“That old church? Wait, who’s Jacob?” His bike roared to life on the first try and he spun it back around as he goosed it. “This is just insane!”

“Let’s hope I live to explain it all to you. Sorry I ever doubted you as a friend.” Hotan lay on the accelerator, leaving Hisota in the dust.

Chapter Twenty-One

The wind whipped his hair across his face, but he paid no attention to the stinging sensation. His heart pounded into his throat with each passing second. Geliah had Shellie and no one knows what he will do. The tires squealed at every turn as he gunned his bike as far as it would go without losing control. He could see the cathedral’s silhouette against the night sky, growing taller as he came down the last stretch.

My worst nightmare has come true. I have put Shellie in trouble, no worse; put her very life at risk!

He skidded to a stop on the street out front, dropping his bike hard on the asphalt as he raced towards the doors. Hotan felt queasy as he held his breath, unsure of the scene that would appear before him when he finally pulled the doors open.

“Finally! You’ve joined the party!” Geliah laughed as he jerked Shellie closer to him causing her to squeal and sob. “I was wondering if you’d have the balls to even show up!”

“Let her go, Geliah.” He took a cautionary step forward, but it didn’t intimidate Geliah at all. “This fight is between us. She’s nothing to you.”

“Oh! But she’s something to you, is she not?” His amber eyes grew eager as he grinned, you could see the excitement tremble through him. “She does look a lot like the last one you lost.”

“You might as well give up on using the past to stir my nerves. I’m not the Hotan you think I am, but I am what you’re looking for.” He took an uneasy swallow, unable to read Geliah’s thoughts or actions, his new skills weren’t doing him any good. “I don’t care that you made a deal with Talib to wait a few more months. We can settle this now.”

“Oh but that would be too convenient for the both of us.” He jerked Shellie’s face up against his own, cheek to cheek. “Wouldn’t it my dear?”

“Please, please let me go.” She sobbed heavily, her green eyes terrified and wild.

“What do you want? Tell me now!” Hotan didn’t break his stare on Shellie as Geliah handled her roughly. “Name it! Anything Geliah!”

“Oh, but I don’t think you want to pay the price.” Geliah growled, his grin never faltering as his eyes glowered at him. “You see. What she’s seeing now is much more frightening than me!”

“How dare you.” He was still working his way closer to Geliah, who stood below the crucifix that bear witness to the events unfolding below it. “What did you do to her?”

“Oh, just a simple trick,” He jerked her once more, placing his blade tight against her throat sending her in a tearful panic. “Nothing out of the ordinary really.”

“Please,” She begged her voice hoarse from her long excursion through hell. “Please Hotan, don’t kill me. Please, I love you. Don’t kill me, Hotan. I don’t know why you’re so angry with me. Whatever is going on, I can help. Just please, not this.”

“You bastard!” He could feel his blood boil at the very thought that Shellie sees it as him threatening to take her life away. “Stop this! This is insane, it’s uncalled for! You’ve had your fun with her! Now stop it!”

“Oh is it now? Uncalled for?” Geliah laughed, enjoying the game he had laid out. “Or else what? You’ll use those non-existent powers of yours to stop me?”

They stood in silence for a few moments. Hotan had no idea what to do, especially with the way his chest ached at the idea he was the person causing Shellie’s fear.

If I could just tell her, I am here to rescue her. That it isn’t me, that it’s Geliah, but-

He knew no way of clearing the spell that held her mind and eyes.

I can’t focus enough to sense how he is using his ability. What should I do? I haven’t figured out my own powers and to battle Geliah now would be suicide.

Her bottom lip trembled as tears continued falling.

Suicide will have to do as long as it means saving Shellie. She made everything worth living through and dealing with, no matter how horrible it looked. Where is Talib? Even Jacob? I hate that I can’t do anything. I need help, but they are all probably on the other side of town still.

“Oh that’s right! It almost slipped my mind!” Geliah released Shellie and she dropped to her knees, revealing the shackles chained to the statue behind her. “Cassie, my dear, bring in the rest of our Tea Party guests!”

Who else? Who else does he have! Cassie was passed out! I was sure of it before I left!

His eyes grew wide as he watched Cassie and Callan drag in Talib and Jacob. They were barely conscious as they shoved them both to the ground, pale.

Jacob might have over expended his power, but Talib too? Did they catch him off guard?

His breath tightened in his chest realizing he was on his own. Kyle he prayed was at least on his way to the hospital thanks to Cassie’s ambush earlier.

I hope that means the same for Hisota.

Now the people he depended on the most for power had failed to stop the nightmarish movie that played out.

Alone, again.

“Here you go, Baby.” Cassandra blew Geliah a kiss as she propped one heeled boot on Talib’s back, making him flinch and moan. “I believe that finishes roll call for this evening. Maybe you should have enrolled in sports, sweetheart. That tackle was weak.”

“What now, oh great wise Hotan?” Geliah’s delusion continued on as Hotan’s blood went from boiling to ice. “You have no one left, and you were so careless, all your friends got hurt playing with us. What a shame.”

“This is insane.” Hotan breathed as he painfully stared from one hurt face to the other and stopping on Shellie’s terrified face full of tears. “I’m so sorry. If I knew, if I could...”

“Aww, he’s getting weepy on us, honey.” Cassie mocked, watching on with the same compassion as her lover, Geliah. “Are you going to cry?”

“Well, I think everything is in order.” Geliah walked up the steps and stood in front of the statue, stretching his arms out. Letting out an excited scream, it sounded much like a singer on stage, yet primal. “Oh am I going to love watching you being so helpless! I hated that you made me live all those futile lives, so weak and disgusting! An insult considering what we went through!”

“I’m so sorry. This is my fault. Everyone’s hurt because I couldn’t figure it out.” Hotan was starting to shut down as his emotions swallowed him down into the deepest and darkest place it could. “Just kill me. End it now.”

“Oh? That would be too easy.” Geliah took in a deep refreshing breath as he stared him down. “I prefer to let you suffer some. Let’s see, I have the choice between the brother and the lover, which to start with?”

“Leave them out of it. I’m what you’re after.” Every muscle in his body burned as he fought not to shake in fear and anger. “Your curse was my doing and only my death can undo it. Just kill me. Take me instead. I can’t fight back, what more could you ask for?”

“Feh, you’re no fun.” Geliah’s smile faded as he looked across the room and took in his masterpiece of devastation. “Ok, I’ll let you say your goodbyes, and then I’ll finish you off.”

“You mean it. You’ll let them go?” Mouth dry, throat hurting, Hotan looked at Shellie, his heart racing in terror and hope. “After they go, we’ll finish this?”

“Sure I’ll let them go. Here.” Hotan flinched as keys landed at his feet. “I’ll even let you unlock your girl’s shackles personally. Hell, even exchange kissy faces a little for kicks! Make a good show of it!”

“It’s a deal then.” He crouched down, picking up the keys and watched Geliah, cautious of what he may do next. “I’ll say my goodbyes and then we’ll get down to business, just you and I, no one else.”

“Deal.” The grin on Geliah’s face sent chills through him as he cautiously walked over to the heap that was Shellie. “Shellie? Are you, are you ok? It’s me. The real me, I won’t hurt you. I never would hurt you. God, I am so sorry. Please forgive me. Please, I’m sorry.”

“Please, please don’t hurt me.” She mumbled as she stared at the ground. “Please let me go, Hotan. Please.”

“It’s ok. Everything’s going to be ok. Be strong.” He helped her to her feet and began to undo the shackles around her ankles, his chest feeling as if it was going to explode from the distraught he felt. “This nightmare will be over soon enough. I’m so sorry. I should’ve been there for you more. Please forgive me, Shellie.”

“Hotan?” She stared at him now, as she stood, backing up, placing his hands on her shoulders. “But, you, you’re, please Hotan.”

“Please for the love of God forgive me.” A tear slid down his cheek as he stared into those lush green eyes that had been hurt so horribly. “I never would’ve put you in danger like this if I had known.”

“Hotan, it’s real- Ugh!” Hotan felt ripping agony burn through his abdomen as he watched her face contort and eyes go out of focus. “Ho, tan.”

“Shellie!” He held onto her as the ripping sensation horrendously removed itself and they fell backwards onto the cold, hard marble floor. “You bastard! Augh!”

Hotan saw Geliah standing over them. He had failed to keep an eye on him and had paid the ultimate price. Geliah had swooped down like a hawk, running his wicked blade through Shellie and into Hotan’s own gut. The pain burned through him and he could feel the warm rush of blood as it waved over his body. He had failed to protect Shellie. She lay limp and heavy on top of him as the warmth from her body was starting to drift away into a lifeless chill. He rolled her to the side, frantically brushing her hair from her face, sobbing as he shook her, ignoring his own injuries as he continued bleeding. Blood spread out around them as it crawled away from her body.

“No! Shellie! Please, please wake up.” His heart was breaking, she wouldn’t open her eyes, and he could feel her fading away. “Don’t leave me, I need you. Don’t leave me alone here. Please, why, why you?”

Hotan shook her repeatedly, desperate for some signs of life. At last, he realized she was gone.

I failed her, I lost her. Alone, I’m all alone.

She was cold, her eyes faded, no longer alive with the green that he had grown to admire. Shellie would never be there by his side. He was alone in the world. He hugged her bitterly limp body close to him as he cried and screamed, rage consuming him as he did so.

Geliah watched with satisfaction that he had gotten what he wanted from his deceitful act. The floor around him slowly filled to red as he rocked her in his arms, falling into a remorseful silence.

I’m so sorry Shellie. I should have protected you. I was careless. Please forgive me. I can only hope you realized it wasn’t me, in the end, that brought you such fear. I will make Geliah pay for what he’s done to you. What he has done to Kyle and everyone else, this has to stop, even if it costs me my life. I will make it up to you.

“I kept my deal. I let her go.” Geliah’s growing chuckle added to the wintry atmosphere that had filled the room. “I never said I was letting her go alive! Tsk-tsk, will you hold up your end of the bargain? We made a deal! Bahahaha!”

“You bastard,” Hotan growled as he continued holding the frosty Shellie, his love, in his arms. “I will do more than hold up my end of this bargain.”

Hotan was burning up inside between his gushing wound and fury. Geliah had pushed him too far and will pay for his crimes. Geliah has spent years terrorizing the others and who knows how many innocents like Shellie. Only one person was strong enough to take him out and that was him, if only he had his powers or at least knew what they were. He can end this if he could just grasp what to do.

I want to put an end to this. He’s hurt everyone that I care about and I need to end it. I will make sure I end this.

As his emotions washed over him and played out those last seconds over and over, the blood he sat in began to steam. The smell of copper and iron began to fill the large cathedral. Geliah watched, aroused as the blood began to boil and glow blue. He had done it; he had awakened his powers and a fight worth fighting was upon them. Laughter from Geliah filled the room, as he grew more excited seeing he had struck a nerve.

He kissed her icy lips and laid her softly on the floor as he raised himself onto his feet, steam swirling about him. Blood still dripped from the gaping gash in his stomach as he clinched his fist at his sides. The glowing blue grew larger until it seemed as if he was on fire with large flames whipping towards the ceiling. Black marks crawled and veined across his skin as he looked up at Geliah with insufferable hatred. He had paid a horrible price to gain access to these powers and he was going to make sure that Geliah felt the full extent of his abilities.

I will do her right.

“Well that’s a pretty light show, don’t you think?” Cassie whistled as she shot a glance at Callan who remained silent. “You never say much do you?”

“You’ve all made a grave mistake.” Callan’s dark eyes glared at her, his pale gaunt face baring a mournful look. “You two will pay for what you’ve done here tonight. I will not pity you for the punishment that boy will give you. There will be no mourning the loss of you or Geliah. You have tortured us all long enough.”

“Now that’s the kind of powers I’m talking about!” Geliah spun around laughing up into the ceiling above. “Now I’m going to have a fight. I love it when a plan works like clockwork!”

“I’ll make short work of this Geliah.” Hotan could feel the power surging through him, almost like a whisper telling him all the secrets he had been trying to find. They were flooding all the empty spaces within him. “I promise you that.”

“I doubt it.” Geliah raised his crimson colored sword that was still wearing Shellie’s blood, pointing it at him. “You don’t have a chance, I’m afraid.”

Despite the swiftness of Geliah’s strike it all appeared slow to Hotan. He was no longer on the same playing field; he was beyond it. The sword came quick and hard as Geliah sent a slicing cut towards his head. Hotan’s body felt as if it was reacting on its own accord. He casually reached up and caught the blade with his bare hand and watched as the sword rusted, crumbling from the touch. It was almost as if he had aged the material in fast forward. Geliah’s eyes went wide as he paled. Behind him, he could hear Cassie crying out and her heels were cracking across the marble like thunder as she ran towards them. Hotan grabbed Geliah’s throat as he stared him in the eyes, drinking up the fear he saw. He had come into his powers much further than anyone could have predicted.

“But, but how.” Geliah stared as his lips failed him.

“This will be your punishment.” Hotan grinned wildly at Geliah returning all those tortured moments. “You thought you had it bad before. This will be the appropriate retribution for the crimes you have committed against your own kind, and more importantly, taking her life. Enjoy your trip to Hell.”

A scream of pain echoed throughout the church as Cassie pinged off the wall of blue flames. They had created a barrier around the two of them. She was going to be the next on his list after he finished with her lover. He gripped Geliah’s throat tighter cutting the air from him. An explosion of blue fire, accompanied with a deafening sound of something imploding. It was an overwhelming sound similar to air being sucked into a vacuum. He let go, allowing Geliah to fall limp on the ground. He towered over him, as the only sound was that of Cassie’s hysterical crying. It had been done.

“I refuse to lower myself to your level. I’m no monster.” Hotan let out a disheartened sigh, almost regretting that he couldn’t return the act of taking a life. “But this should be a fair enough purgatory for you.”

“You killed him!” Cassie crawled over to Geliah as the flames absorbed back into Hotan. “Geliah! Geliah!”

I’m so sorry. Callan’s shaken words did nothing to ease what had happened. I couldn’t do anything, I was too weak and I-

Geliah suddenly took in a gasp of air, desperate to refill his lungs. He began to cough and hack as he struggled to sit up. Pushing Cassie from him, trying to recall what had just happened. Enraged by the thought that he had been defeated by a boy, so flawlessly. Geliah gasped for air for several minutes, continuing to push Cassie to the side as she frantically tried to aid him.

Hotan looked over at Callan who was undoing the bindings on Jake and Talib. At least his assumptions about Callan were right. He had no intentions of aggression. He had fallen victim to Geliah and Cassandra’s games and had no way of getting himself out. Callan had simply done as his Element would have done. Flowed like water and simply rode the current out to peaceful waters. They exchanged reassuring nods before he returned his glance to Geliah. Geliah wobbled weakly onto his feet.

“What did you do to me?” Geliah glowered at him as he struggled to stand. “What the hell did you do!”

“I did what should have been done a long time ago. You no longer have any power.” Hotan’s mournful stare gave pity onto Geliah. “And you’re now truly a mortal. You are no different from all those you’ve ever tortured or killed over your long years. I recommend you use your time wisely. It’s going to be your last before the Devil himself drags you to hell.”

“Damn you!” Geliah’s balance faltered, falling to his knees and banging his fist into the marble floor. “I’d rather be dead! Just be a man and kill me!”

“I am glad to see you will not enjoy your time-” Cassie started pounding her fist against Hotan’s chest, her mascara streaming down her face as she continued to cry. “Oh yes. I almost forgot.”

Grabbing her by the wrists, Hotan looked her in the eyes. She froze as she looked at him, shivering in his grip as tears fell. Just as before, a loud sucking sound consumed the cathedral. Her eyes rolled back into her head and he let her go. She fell with a thud next to Geliah, who was still submerged in his own self-pity. He neglected to even spare a moment’s glance in her direction as he spat curse after curse at Hotan, howling like a mad man. Geliah was too weak as he continued to fail to stay standing.

“What a shame that you throw her love for you to the side.” Hotan felt sympathy for Cassie as he walked away, hearing her gasping and coughing on the floor behind him. “How horrible for her.”

Hotan allowed himself to fall to his knees next to Shellie. All he could do was stare at her lifeless body as it lay cold and empty. She was gone. His hand reached out and closed her eyelids. It hurt to see her so dead and barren. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed when Talib and Jacob managed to wake up and approach the blood bath that lay around him. They gasped as they came closer to him. There was no way for him to rip his eyes from her lifeless body. That was his entire world laying there on that cold, hard floor in front of him. Alone.

“Hotan,” Jacob’s voice was low and stunned as he knelt on the other side of her body. “She’s gone. We need to get you out of here. I wish I were able to stop it. I tried and I let you down. I’m so sorry.”

“I let you down.” Wobbling, Talib leaned on a nearby pew. “I let my guard down. I did not want it to end this way. It should have never gone this way. Hotan, Hotan you need to leave.”

Tears poured down Hotan’s cheeks as he listened in silence. They all had tried so hard to stop this from happening. It was out of everyone’s control. No one was able to prevent, let alone predict the outcome. His anger had receded when he was content that he gave Geliah a fitting punishment. He hated being a mortal more than death itself. It was all he could think of. His stomach, heart and soul, wouldn’t allow him to take another person’s life. It would have been an easy out for Geliah if he had killed him. He wanted him to suffer. It was only fair.

“What should we do?” Jacob’s purple eyes were watery with despair as he looked over at Talib. “He’s in shock. I hate to move him, but the police are bound to be on their way. I can only do so much explaining.”

“Saphellia is on her way.” Sitting on the pew, Talib placed his face in his hands. “She will take him to my place. I will stick around and use my power to help smooth this over.”

“I can bring her back.” Hotan managed the words, choking on the tightness in his throat. Whispers were murmuring all the dark secrets of the element of Rebirth to him. “I could bring her back. I know how.”

“What?” Talib looked up at him, watching him kneeling beside her. The look on his face showed the years of fear dancing in his eyes. “Bring her back?”

“I have the power to bring her back.” Breaking his stare from her body, he looked Talib in the eyes. “But it wouldn’t be her, anymore. It wouldn’t be her at all.”

“What do you mean?” Jacob shuddered as he caught a glance of the wound still dripping blood in his abdomen. “We need to get you to the hospital, Hotan.”

“It wouldn’t be her, anymore.” Hotan muttered over and over. He was cold, tired and broken.

“You can resurrect the dead.” Stumbling to his feet, Talib worked his way over to him, laying a heavy hand on his shoulder. “You can bring her back?”

“No, not her.” Hotan allowed his head to fall on Talib’s shoulder as he murmured on. “It would be another person, a look alike, a fake. Shellie would still be gone. She has left. It only works if they are still there and she left so fast…”

“Hotan,” Tears slid down Jake’s cheeks as he came over to help Talib pull him to his feet. They urgently increased the distance between him and Shellie’s body. “I am so sorry. I, dear God, I hate that you are, I’m sorry I was too dumb to figure this out in time.”

“It would be Shellie without her soul, another soul.” Mumbling was the only thing Hotan could manage as they ushered him out the door and towards the car that awaited outside. “Shellie is gone. I’ve lost her. I failed her. Alone, I am all alone.”

“Jesus,” Saphellia’s face drained of color as she watched as they practically dragged him, soaked with blood, dripping steadily as they continued. “Is he going to make it?”

“I, I don’t know.” Jake looked at her, both thinking that he was too badly injured to make it even to the hospital. “He was wounded before I even came to, and that was quite a while ago.”

“Let’s get him in the car quick.” She jerked the backseat door open and rushed to pick up his feet to speed the process along. “Please don’t die on me kid. We’ve only just met!”

They dragged Hotan into the backseat. It was getting harder to breath; his body was numb and cold. He could feel the pain there, but he didn’t care to give it any attention. It was the only feeling he had left that made him feel alive on the inside. Watching as they exchanged words, he had stopped listening a long time ago. All he wanted to do was to close his eyes and fade away.

Just let go.

“Hotan!” Talib was yelling again, and he had him by the jaw. It was hurting him as he cracked his eyes open to see why he was disturbing him. “Heal yourself! I know you can do it. Dammit, heal yourself!”

“Why?” Closing his eyes Hotan began to feel annoyed at the interruption. “I don’t want to. I’m dead.”

“I said to heal yourself.” Heat came crawling into him, but he hadn’t any will left to fight it. “I’ll make you if I have to. You hear me, Hotan. I will make you live!”

Chapter Twenty-Two

It was dark and musky smelling in the apartment. Hotan allowed it to go unattended as he spent most of his day on the couch or on the mattress. Light from the window in the living room had bothered him so he took another band poster and covered it. Nothing seemed bright or warm anymore. There was just the hurt from the gaping hole where Shellie used to be. His worse fear had happened. No one even had a chance to stop it. He thought a public space was sufficient enough to discourage Geliah, but that had been a foolish comfort. He should have been by her side.

Geliah and Cassandra both were rotting in a mental institute for a long list of crimes, including the murder of Shellie. He couldn’t help but regret not taking their lives, but once more, he knew deep down it wouldn’t have satisfied the pain he felt. In the end, there would have been a severe recoil for him to use such an action. Many of his friends had come and went, trying to take care of him or cheer him up at the least. There were so many questions and feelings overtaking him that all he could do is just sit there. Letting them wash over him and drown him again and again.

There was no denying he had come into his immortality. He had come aware of his abilities and the curse of the element of Rebirth. He no longer needed to eat or anything that would qualify as a normal human function. All that remained was the body that imprisoned him there in that tiny apartment. It was clear that Hotan had every right to fear his own abilities. He was practically a God, but it did him no good. It wasn’t enough to save Shellie or even bring her back. He was all alone in the world.

Why did I let Talib force me to heal himself?

He could have left with her that night. Instead, he had allowed him to access his abilities and use it to heal him in a flash of blue.

Laying there on the mattress, staring endlessly at the ceiling, he rubbed his abdomen. A tiny thin scar remained where he had been torn open by Geliah’s blade. There may have been barely any signs of his wound, but he wouldn’t forget the pain that it had induced. Time had passed, he had no idea how many months had come and gone in his sulking. He felt broken.

He had managed to attend her funeral, where he had taken his acoustic guitar and sung Seether’s Broken in tribute. It was the only song that expressed how he felt about losing her. Never again will he see those green eyes. He didn’t feel right now that she was gone. It was hard seeing her parent’s faces that day.

Do they blame me for not being able to protect her? No, they had no idea I was even there…

Sighing, he rolled to his side, his eyes falling onto a gray cat with yellow eyes sitting there watching him. She had shown up immediately after Shellie’s death, but he hadn’t the drive to figure out if it was really Abigail. He assumed it was, but she hadn’t spoken a word to him. In fact, he hadn’t even heard her signature giggle. He slowly sat up, careful not to break his stare with her. There was something stirring deep in him and he couldn’t ignore it. He had made a promise and he intended to keep it.

“Abigail, I intend to keep my promise to you.” The cat simply tilted its head at him, flicking its tail back and forth. “I am sorry for neglecting to do as promised and not getting to it sooner.”

“You’ve lost your love. It hurts so much to see you so sad.” She came closer nudging her feline head on his leg. “I am so sorry.”

“There was nothing any of us could do.” Shuddering he attempted to shake the wave of sorrow from him, he was tired of the feeling. It was bringing him no comfort. “Shellie would want me to move on. To continue to move forward in order to honor her leaving this world. How long have I allowed myself to rot here in my own torment and regret?”

“I don’t think you want to know that.” Changing into her true form, as the dark haired little girl, she sat next to him, her head leaning on his shoulder. “You have been here like this for a very long time.”

“Several months I suppose.” Rubbing his face he couldn’t help but feel dirty and grimy. “A good 6 months? Tops?”

“Longer.” He could barely hear her. “Over a year.”

“A year,” Nausea waved over him to think that he had allowed himself to grieve in filth for that long.

I’ve grieved for over a year. Not eating, not living, just tormenting myself in my own private purgatory. I’ve punished myself enough for what happened…

“I can’t sit here like this. It does no one any good. It does nothing for me, nothing for her.” The weight of his shame made his shoulders ache.

“Hotan, I am so sorry.” Abigail sniffled, rubbing tears away from her cheeks with her fist. “I was too scared to help…”

“I have been sorry for far too long.” Jerking up he headed for the shower. “I need to clean up my act. The old Hotan made this mistake, I will not follow his path of destruction. I refuse to repeat history.”

Hotan could feel the grime of his lament wash off his skin, allowing it to be swallowed down the drain.

This is horrible.

He should have never let himself waste away for this long. Shellie would have disapproved about him doing this for a few months, but over a year was beyond mourning her lose. He didn’t allow himself to grieve this long for his mother, and there was no reason for it now. It was only right to honor losing a life by living your life to the fullest. Anything other than that was disrespectful.

His skin felt fresh and he was feeling better. Shutting the shower off, he leaned his head against the shower wall, taking in deep breaths. He needed to start making plans to set himself up. He was immortal, but now was the time to take care of unfinished business. If he had goals to make, this was his only moment in the never ending life to do them as himself and not the mysterious undying entity.

Finally he was thinking outside of the black pool of heartache. With a towel around his waist, he walked out of the bathroom, drying his hair with second one. Abigail’s cheeks were red and looking away as he sat on the couch. The poor girl was stuck in a state of being a child, yearning to be an adult, fighting to be herself all this time. There was nothing intimate or personal about having to change yourself to do things you wanted to experience. This obviously weighed on her heart heavily. His sorrow shifted for her at that moment.

Hotan sat on the couch next to her as he took a moment to enjoy being clean and awake. The room was still dark but he would fix that later. First thing he wanted to do was help Abigail. He leaned over and kissed the top of her head, a pulse of power drummed from the soft touch. She turned to him wide eyed as blue steam lifted from her body. As if time itself had sped up, she started to age before him. She glared at her little hands as they slowly came into hands that belonged to an adult. He figured twenty-three was a good age for her as he walked away into his bedroom, a grin of content on his face.

“What, what did you do?” The steam slowly faded as she marveled over her long legs and her new arms and hands. “Is it real? Will it stay?”

“I hope that age suits you.” He tossed some clothes down next to her on the couch. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think about the fact your dress would be too small to handle the change. Here are some clothes. Keep them. Sorry if I embarrassed you any.”

“Oh?” Abigail blushed realizing her tiny dress had survived as an awkward shirt, with stitches popped in a few places with holes. “Oh no.”

“Take your time.” He had quickly returned to his room to give her privacy. “Feel free to use the bathroom and anything else.”

It was a long moment of silence as he dressed and started to take down the poster that covered his bedroom window. The cool breeze swept into the room to flush out the stale air as he opened his window. It was long overdue. Hotan leaned out on the windowsill, squinting as the sun beamed down on him brightly. It was weird that he could feel his power snaking through him. Whispering things to him as if telling him all its riddles so that he may do what he pleased with it. The next agenda it was murmuring to him was to find replacements. He was holding the elements Fear and Earth within himself, and he couldn’t keep it that way if he wanted to keep his own power balanced.

Who would I choose to become immortal and have to live with this curse?

“Thank you.” Abigail was beautiful, with her athletic build. Dark pools for eyes and long wavy black hair pass her hips, she could have been a model in another life. “I never knew it was even possible. I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you. But for now, thank you.”

“It’s the least I can do for you. You helped me when you didn’t have to.” He smiled warmly at her, enjoying the red in her cheeks. “You can just continue to keep me company. I am in no mood to be alone. Despite my state, you’ve been with me every second for over a year Abigail. Thank you for making sure I was never alone. I hate being alone…”

“Thank you.” She tugged at the baggy shirt and pulled the cargo shorts up, trying to adjust to her new body. “I would like to stay longer, as long as you’re ok with that? I have been on my own for far too long as well. I need to grow up some more.”

“I hope it’s easier to do so.” It was good to be able to smile again, but his life was changing faster. He was beyond living a normal life, he had to start thinking like an immortal. “Let’s get you some better fitting clothes. You look close to Annie’s size, so let’s go pay her a visit. She must be worried sick over how badly I’ve been doing.”

Abigail followed close behind him, much like a lost sheep. Musing over her legs and enjoying every step she took, he heard her giggling behind him. At least he was able to do something good with the powers that he held. He could feel an immortal was close as they worked their way down the stairs. Hotan had to catch Abigail a few times, as she fumbled over her legs. Laughing, she grew more excited about what it was like to be in a true adult body. As he made the corner towards Annie’s door, Jacob was leaning on the wall, smoking a cigarette.

“Hotan!” Jake’s eyes sparkled as he saw him. “Oh I am so relieved to see you up and about! Out of the apartment finally!”

“Thanks, I just wish someone had pulled me out of that sooner.” A laugh escaped him as he watched Abigail run down the hallway, holding the shorts up as she went. “But I am trying to make up for the lost time.”

“Who’s the girl?” Jake grinned goofily as he watched her run back to Hotan and began panting from the sprint. “I don’t recognize you, but I do feel you’re one of us? Did I miss something?”

“It’s me!” Huffing she swallowed as she slowed her breathing. “Abigail!”

“Abigail! Since when do you pose yourself as an adult, young lady?” Jake shot a look at him then returned his stare to her. “Or did something happen?”

“Nothing like that,” Heat poured over Hotan’s face as he realized what Jake might be thinking. “Nothing like that at all! I used my power to age her forward a few years so she wasn’t stuck as a little girl anymore. It didn’t seem right. Especially since I know that he could have fixed it so long ago.”

“Sure, you did nothing else.” Jake winked at him as he finished his cigarette, putting it out in the nearby ashtray. “Let’s go get Annie. She’s been worried sick about you. I was running out of excuses, ya know.”

“I figured as much. Plus Abigail needs some clothes that won’t fall off.” They followed him into the apartment where the smell of Annie’s famous spaghetti filled the air. “Now I feel hungry.”

“We’ve got company, Babe.” They could hear what sounded like the oven closing in the kitchen.

“Who? Did you invite someone over without telling me again?” Annie was laughing as she finished the task in front of her before turning to see whom Jake had dragged in. “Hotan!”

Annie was across the apartment in a flash, hugging the air from Hotan’s lungs. She had always been like a maternal big sister to him. He squeezed her back happy to be out of his self-made prison. Allowing the warmhearted greetings to smooth over the last of the sharp edges of his sorrow, he was finally back on stable ground. It was nice to know everyone had missed his presence and was thrilled to see him on his feet. It was feeling great to be back in the world.

“Oh my! Who’s this?” Making eye contact with Abigail, she pulled away from the hug exchanging a tender smile with her. “A new friend? Hi, I’m Annie.”

“Not exactly, I, uh, well it’s hard to explain, but if you have any spare clothes she could really use them. Mine don’t fit her very well.” Scratching his head, Hotan contemplated what or how he was going to go about telling Annie. “Her dress got ruined earlier today.”

“Her name’s Abigail. She’s the one I was telling you about a few days ago.” Jake’s voice was smooth and calm. “She’s one of us.”

“Oh! The little girl who turns into things,” Annie nodded as she took Abigail by the hand, leading her to her bedroom. “Come on sweetie, let’s take care of this.”

“Wait, you told her?” Astonished, Hotan gaped at Jake, amazed once more by the man’s actions. “Did you even tell her about me?”

“Yup, I told her everything.” Jake stared coolly at Annie’s bedroom door smirking. “There are some things in this life that are worth the risk. I truly love that woman and spending a portion of this immortal life with her is worth everything to me. It’s best to share everything I know with her to keep her even closer. This one is going to hurt the most though. As you may have assumed, I’ve loved and lost many lovers over the centuries. There is just a small few that are like Annie. They aren’t kidding when they say you only find a girl like that every other century.”

“Hurt the most?” The sparkle had faded in Jake’s purple eyes as he stared heavily at Hotan with a distant look in them. “I always hate out living them. Watching them slowly lose themselves or passing. I have loved many, but there’s something about Annie that pulls at me. Truly one of a kind, you don’t find her type very often. I know it’ll hurt, but I don’t want to miss out on being with her. Sometimes the hurt is worth every minute. Remember that. I can vouch that it is better to love than have not loved at all. I have tried both ways…”

“I can fix that.” Hotan spoke before he could stop himself. “I can make her one of us. She would be appropriate for what I need her to be.”

“You can’t be serious?” The color bled from Jacob’s face. “Hotan, as much as I appreciate the offer, I couldn’t bear making someone live this long. It’s tearing all of us apart as it is.”

“I know.” Hotan was mumbling low as he fought the facts in his head, desperately arguing with himself on the matters that still needed addressing. Quarrelling with the boiling power that barked its commands and needs at him like the caged animal it truly was. “But I have a problem. I have to find replacements for Geliah and Cassandra. I am out of balance and it does wreak havoc on me if I allow it to continue for too long. It’ll start causing imbalance in everyone else as well if it goes unresolved. We need people to take over Earth and Fear.”

“Replacements?” Jake ran his hand through his short blonde hair, staring hard at Annie’s bedroom door. “I, I just don’t know. I guess it makes sense that you merely absorbed their elements. Now we just need to give them to better users. Better people. Dammit, to have to drag people into this curse just makes me sick to my stomach.”

“She would make a great host for Earth. She is nurturing and strong.” Hotan felt exhausted, thoughts bubbling over in his head repeatedly. “It has to be done. I care about Annie like a sister, almost a second mom. I don’t think I could bear watching her go through this either. But I don’t think I could handle knowing I would eventually lose her in the end no matter what came to pass.”

They stood in silence, pondering over the idea. The girls came out of the bedroom giggling. Annie had dressed Abigail in a black tank top, white over shirt and black frilled mini skirt. Hotan couldn’t help but think once more, on how beautiful she was. A complete opposite of Shellie, but just as attractive. He felt himself blush.

Maybe I could learn to love again. Shellie would be more than happy to share me now that she was gone. She was always giving in that way. Let her be safe in the afterlife and give me courage for what I have to face. Life is never-ending for me. I am so sorry Shellie that I will not even get to see you in the afterlife either.

“I’ll have to talk to her about it.” Jake’s voice cut through his thoughts. “It’s her decision, not ours.”

“I wouldn’t be that cruel to force anyone into this mess. I had no choice, and I am still having a hard time with it.” Both sighing they turned back to the girls.

Hotan felt more down to earth with each passing moment. Unfortunately, he was still distracted by the whispers of instructions from his fluctuating power. Telling him, screaming at him at how important balance was. He had someone for Earth in mind, but another name and face told him whom the element of Fear belonged to. That person was Hisota.

Everyone brought together due to the underlying currents from their immortality and power, but Hisota was not one of them.

Why had Hisota been drawn to the group? He was predetermined to be the replacement for Geliah. This is even beyond me. Above what any of them could realize, we have no control of our fates. Even with my own incredible power, I have no say so in what may happen from this point. We are at the mercy of life and nature itself.

“I am ready.” Annie’s voice was solid and the look in her eyes told him all that he needed to know.

She was ready and had accepted the impossible task before her. Hotan looked from her to Hisota. With a confident nod to one another, he too confirmed he was ready. He had found his replacements for the elements Earth and Fear. They were far better people than the ones who had possessed the power for all this time. Feeling confident they fit the bill, Hotan took a steadying inhale.

Hisota did not hesitate to take him up on the offer for becoming immortal and the element of Fear. He was infamous to strike fear in others, with his relentless bullying, yet he had set aside his own fears and stood against the unknown without pause. Risked his own life without a shred of fear in Hotan’s eyes that day with Cassie. There was also the fact that out of the three friends, he was the only mortal. It almost seemed as if he was meant to join their ranks according to some divine plan.

I can’t ignore that all the puzzle pieces fit far too well.

“Ok, here we go.” Hotan spoke softly to the both of them as he reached both hands out, one towards each of them. Delicately he tapped both of them on the forehead with the palms of his hands. He couldn’t keep them from shaking with the weight of their duty. Blue light filled their eyes and as they gasped, the blue flames sucked into them, as if it were a breath of air. Luckily, Jacob and Kyle were behind them as they collapsed; sweat beading across their skin as the blue faded. It was done, they were immortal.

After a good hour or so, the two of them started to moan and move. Everyone in the room started to breathe easier. Their muscles let go of the worried tension they had been holding during the event. Jacob snuggled closer to Annie kissing her head as a tear slid down one cheek. Hotan never realized how passionate he was and he was glad that someone with a large heart had been the element of Lust, no, the element of Love. Jake truly moved those around him by his love and in return, he was moved by their kinship even more so.

“Wow.” Annie rubbed her eyes as she managed to sit up straight. “That was amazing. The warmth was, it was so. It was simply miraculous.”

“You ok?” Jacob nuzzled her as he pulled her head to his chest. “You should probably take it easy, and remember what we told you two.”

“Yea, yea, be careful using our powers, we can really get ourselves in a bind.” Hisota was leaning onto his knees, rubbing his face. “It really feels different being like this. Exciting and frightening. I can feel. I feel the fear you all have about this. It’s so strong yet intoxicating. No wonder Geliah encouraged chaos.”

“Yes, it feels like you are cursed in a way.” Hotan couldn’t help but remind them of what he had said it felt like. “Just remember there are several of us in the city. We are still missing some, but as far as we know, they are still in a state of reincarnation. I prefer we leave them alone. It’s best that they enjoy it while it lasts. The more of us that awake, the closer it draws the remaining sleepers to where we are.”

Electricity seemed to shoot through everyone in the room. They had all stood in one swift jolt in unison, all staring at the ceiling. The power that wafted down from there was chilling and it didn’t feel right. In fact, it didn’t even feel alive. Hotan’s spirit rattled at him as he recognized the feel, the essence of what stood on the building above them.

It was the shadow figure from his dream. He had been too drained to pay the repeating dream any attention. It had only increased since Geliah and he ignored it.

What or who was this bringer of death and destruction that had been hunting Hotan down? Has Death finally come to claim me?

Chapter Twenty-Three

“Talib!” Hotan had made it out of the door first, scrambling onto the rooftop in time to see a pale Talib hit and slide across the rooftop gravel towards him. “No! Talib!”

He rushed to him, flipping him over to see ashen skin and hazed eyes of death. Talib was dead. Hotan screamed, crazed with sorrow as he pounded Talib’s chest. Shaking in choking sobs as he knelt there, he could feel the cold and decayed aura approaching him. Laughter rolled from it, the Shadow Figure. That same laugh he had heard time and time again in his nightmares. He hated it. He was tired of it. It needed to go away, forever.

"Hotan! I shall take my revenge." The animosity in the voice gripped his soul. " I wish to thank you for my tortured life for all these centuries! I’ll send you to a lonely darkness equal to the one you gave me!”

“I hate you!” It couldn’t be. This had to be a nightmare. Why him? Of all the people in the world, why did the shadow figure have to be HIM! “You, why you? Why now!”

“I have searched the world over for you!” The dark hair, the dark eyes, and the hand that choked off the air from his lungs as the man in black lifted Hotan by his throat. His mother’s necklace broke lose as Hotan glared into the face he had spent his entire life loathing. “I must say, this was the first time you’ve stayed long enough to see me in quite some time.”

“It can’t be. Not you.” Hotan struggled for air; he could feel his soul being sucked out of him at the touch of the man’s hand to his skin. “Why, did it have to be you?”

“Huh?” The light was being drawn away by the black flames that whipped off the large man as he picked up the small object that had fell from his victim. “Where did you get this?”

Landing hard, coughing and gasping, Hotan looked up at the man in the black trench coat bewildered. “You should know that already. You remember where-”

“Answer me!” The kick to the ribs sent him rolling over Talib’s cold body. “How dare you come near her!”

“She was my mother! You left us behind!” Hotan was sure a rib was cracked as he desperately tried to keep eye contact with his father, identical to the photos taken so long ago. “You left her, pregnant and helpless!”

“Your, your mother?” Fear over took his eyes as the flames faded and he stood, shocked as feelings long forgotten made themselves known to him once more. “But, but you are my father. Hotan, the one who brought me back into the world to only cast me out. Ashamed of me! Cold and lonely, only death kept me company in my first days on this earth! The one I have been tracking time and time again over these tormented years.”

“I am not Hotan.” Rolling onto his feet, he spit blood onto the rooftop; his breath wheezed and whined as pain shot through with each breath. “I am your son. I was that child you thought was impossible. The son you damned to misery, cursed to be alone.”

“Why would he do something so cruel to me? He left me behind, again.” Hotan’s father stabbed his katana hard and deep into the rooftop, roaring like an animal.

“Tell me your name.” It was a demand as Hotan healed himself, building up the courage and focus he would need. “I WANT YOUR NAME YOU BASTARD!”

“Iapetos.” The dark eyes stared into him as if the devil himself had caught sight of his soul. “Rightfully one of the Titan Gods. Is that not what we are?”

“We are not Gods. We are the cursed ones.” Hotan allowed his power to let lose, to boil out of him as it over filled him. “You have brought enough destruction and agony on this earth. I have waited a long time to meet you, and now that I know who you are. I am not afraid.”

“Not afraid?” Laughing, Iapetos stretched his arms out; revealing large decayed wings, clinging to what clumps of black feathers remained. “Oh! You should be afraid! You may be flesh and blood, but I will take that soul. It still smells like him. I can taste it. His soul will be mine!”

“My God,” Saphellia had come from thin air, she stood shaking as she slid to her knees. Fear overcame her as her eyes reflected the image of what looked like a Dark Angel. “May God have mercy on us.”

“I could care less what affairs you had with Hotan. You are dealing with me, your son, not the one who was your father.” This was the crime, the sin and the fear that the Old Hotan had hidden from them all of them.

His older brother laid dead, people had been hurt and killed over the centuries because he hid- no ran from his own son that he had brought back to life. It wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted to bring Liora back and all he got was this. Something cold and dead, something that wanted to be with him and that he cast to the side. Iapetos had cast me to the side with the same fear and resentment. He will pay for the innocent lives he has carelessly destroyed chasing a coward, a broken man.

I will show him the man I have become and that he failed to be.

They ran at each other. Each crying out, glowering at one another ignoring the others who had made their way to the rooftop. As they came ever closer, black and blue flames collided and blinding light sparked from it. Blinding what had happened, light is all that they saw.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Valerie Willis is a 30-year-old creative mind that pours her imagination into several platforms, whether in the form of sketches, writing, or even developing video games. As far back as Fifth Grade, she would fill composition books full of adventures. As time passed, she found her poetry and short stories winning awards at her schools as well as being added to Anthologies. She is currently working on her Bachelors of Science in Gaming and Simulation Programming with DeVry University. When she isn’t studying for her courses you can usually find her digging through her books regarding mythology and the medieval times as well as scouring the internet for more resources. Occasionally the boys (Jack and Keith!) call her out for a round or two of video games whether it’s Halo on the XBOX 360 or supporting her team on League of Legends online.

Follow her current work on any of the following Sites:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ValerieWillisAuthor

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Valerie_Willis

Website: www.WillisAuthor.com

Tattooed Angels Trilogy

Rebirth

Judgment – Coming 2017

Death – Coming Soon

Cedric Series

Cedric the Demonic Knight

Romasanta: Father of Werewolves

The Oracle – Coming 2017

Eye of Gaea – Coming Soon

Table of Contents

- Acknowledgments
- Chapter One
- Chapter Two
- Chapter Three
- Chapter Four
- Chapter Five
- Chapter Six
- Chapter Seven
- Chapter Eight
- Book of Ancients: The Beginning
- Chapter Nine
- Chapter Ten
- Chapter Eleven
- Chapter Twelve
- Chapter Thirteen
- Chapter Fourteen
- Chapter Fifteen
- Chapter Sixteen
- Chapter Seventeen
- Book of Ancients: Judgment
- Chapter Eighteen
- Book of Ancients: Rebirth
- Chapter Nineteen
- Chapter Twenty
- Chapter Twenty-One
- Chapter Twenty-Two
- Chapter Twenty-Three
- About the Author
- Other Books