New York Crime Kings Box Set: Books 1-4
Date: 2016-08-09 07:00:00+00:00
Keywords: Romance; Crime
Description: BLOOD & RUST – Book #1 Jai Stone... I met him in the shadows first. He was tall and broad-shouldered, a man walking a dangerous path of rage and revenge, barreling toward certain death. The more time we spent together, the more he showed me who he was. Captivating… Charming… Ferocious in his own way… I had no right following Jai into the abandoned industrial site, but I did, and that stupid mistake was all it took to rip me from my world of semi-normalcy and thrust me headfirst into the gritty criminal underground with Stone as my only ally. Aboveground, I'm a student nurse painfully dragging
Publisher: Limitless Publishing LLC

New York

Crime Kings

Round One - Four

Skyla Madi

New York Crime Kings 1-4

Copyright © 2016 by Skyla Madi.

All rights reserved.

First Print Edition: August 2016

Limitless Publishing, LLC

Kailua, HI 96734
www.limitlesspublishing.com

Formatting: Limitless Publishing

ISBN-13: 978-1-68058-768-5

ISBN-10: 1-68058-768-4

No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to locales, events, business establishments, or actual persons—living or dead—is entirely coincidental.

Table of Contents

Blood & Rust

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Elevin

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Sin & Secrets

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Elevin

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Smoke & Metal

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Elevin

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Rage & Bullets

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Elevin

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

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Pronunciation Of The Name Jai

Jai=Jye

It rhymes with pie.

Mmm, pie.

The First Mistake

The lights in the train car flicker as we pass through another tunnel. I let it pull my attention from my e-book on nursing etiquette and I glance around the train. I hadn’t noticed how many people have gotten off since I first stepped on. The once full car is now empty leaving only me, a snoozing old lady and a hooded, broad-shouldered man with his back turned. I guess we’re all from the same part of town. Poor bastards…and I mean that in every sense of the term. We’ve long since passed both upper and middle New York. From here on out, luxury isn’t a word anyone knows.

As we exit a tunnel, the lights above me stabilize and I let my attention float out the window. Masses of colors and shapes blur past. I’ve always liked graffiti, or at least the pretty kind. Nothing brightens your day quite like a good painting of an animal in a hoodie telling the government to go fuck itself. It’s nice to see the constant shades of gray, black and white broken up by a rebellious streak of color. Even when it’s dark like this, at one a.m., it’s nice to have something stand out in what feels like a never-ending blackness.

I return my attention back to my book and read the words on the screen. I try to become intrigued even though I’ve lost my place. I haven’t been a student nurse for long. I’ve learnt enough to know how to dress a wound and insert a cannula, but that’s the extent of it. I spend most of my time watching other nurses, learning as much as I can through them, not with my head stuck in books. I’ve never been good with reading. It never sticks and, as a result of that, I now spend every minute of my life outside of the hospital studying for the exam in three weeks. I’m a hands-on kind of girl, one who chose nursing as a career not only to help people, but for the thrill of not knowing what’s going to come through the door each second. I crave suspense and the unknown. I live off the flurry of excitement and nervousness that comes with surprise.

Strangely, my skin prickles at the thought, like it knows something I don’t, and a loose tendril of excitement twists around my spine. Subtly, I shiver and relish in the feeling, until the random bout of excitement disintegrates and I feel nothing once more.

A crackly voice blares through the speakers announcing my stop, but I don’t need anyone to remind me where I live. I’m aware of it—hyperaware. I couldn’t forget, even if I wanted to.

I reach for the large, brown bag at my feet and pull on the strap, slinging it around my neck and adjusting it between my breasts. It’s heavy and my spine complains as it takes on the weight. Ignoring it, I fumble with my tablet, closing the flap on its screen before the train has arrived at the platform. As the brakes screech and the sound of the slowing wheels becomes more prominent, I move from my seat and into the aisle. I keep my eyes downcast to my black runners, mentally ticking off my checklist, making sure I've got everything.

I grip the pole in the middle and wait patiently as the screeching sound of train brakes echoes through my carriage. The vibrations seize my shoes and tingle up my legs, like a million tiny spiders, as metal clings desperately to metal in a desperate attempt to get the train to stop. Eventually, it slows before finally grinding to a halt. I feel a large body move into the space beside me, but I don’t bother to lift my eyes. Living in this part of the city, I’ve learnt to keep to my own. Something as simple as a glance in the wrong direction can get you in trouble, and trouble is the last thing I need at this time of night.

Two distinct dings chime through the train car and a recording of a robotic woman thanks us and reminds us to watch our step. I linger for a few seconds before the doors pull open with a groan. I move forward before they fully open, and conveniently, so does the stranger beside me. What the fuck happened to common courtesy? Ladies before gentlemen?

With a squeak, I bounce off of the man’s large frame and into the edge of the door. The door shudders as I collide with it and I curse as the tablet I clench in my left hand slips from my grasp and crashes to the dirty, concrete floor, along with my stomach. I stumble forward in an attempt to regain my balance and I manage to, but the cracked screen of my tablet is long gone. Irredeemable. And I don’t have the goddamn money to fix it.

I look up at the man in the black hoodie with the broad shoulders. He keeps walking, his shoulders square and his head down, his backpack slung casually over one shoulder.

“Hey!” I shout after him, but he doesn’t turn around.

I scoop up my tablet and clasp it against my chest. I look east, in the direction of my home, but the rude stranger heads west. Common sense tells me to forget about it, to not follow the large stranger into the shadows, but my empty, moth-eaten wallet demands he replace what he broke. My hunger and hardship team with my pride. There’s no way common sense has a chance. It’s stupid to risk my life for money, but these are dark times and money is the only thing keeping me from throwing myself off the Brooklyn Bridge.

Behind me, the doors of the train close and I hear the brakes release the tracks. Despite my better judgment, I march in direction of the stranger, leaving my sanity and an empty train behind me.

***

Blood.

I hate the taste of it. Even so, I let the metallic tang trickle over my taste buds. A fresh bout of fear flares through my system and I bite down on the inside of my lower lip to keep my body from trembling violently. I follow the man in the hood down a dark alley and into a former industrial area. Rundown warehouses and abandoned machinery litter the space, all of it forgotten by the ever-modernizing world. I purse my lips, worried the rapid sound of my terrified heart will escape through my mouth and awaken whoever and whatever is hiding in the rusted corners of the wasteland. Right now, the tall man who smashed my tablet isn’t my biggest concern. Spiders and tetanus, however…I shudder.

I’ve called out to the stranger a hundred times, but he doesn’t react. I’d thought he was being ignorant until he’d plucked an iPod from the pocket of his hood and scrolled briefly before stuffing it back in.

He can’t hear me.

Great.

Heavy, gray clouds block the glow of the moon and a cold thread of regret slithers down my spine as I follow him further into the dim, industrial abyss. Tall, steel and beaten warehouses tower over us, but the stranger doesn’t glance around him, not even once. It seems he’s comfortable here, much more comfortable than I am. Then again, if I were a man of his size there’d be little I’d be scared of too. A lot of words come to mind when I look at him, but prey is definitely not one of them.

He walks without a care, as if he were going for a casual midnight stroll, but his wide shoulders are held with purpose and determination. His shoes, an expensive pair of thick, white sneakers, barely scuff against the crunchy rubble under his feet. I, however, make no attempt to quieten my steps. Under my worn, black sneakers rocks crumble and small pieces of tin, metal and glass all grind against each other.

“Hey!” I try again. This time, my voice comes out less confident and more uncertain.

To my left something scatters, sending my heart into my throat. Suddenly out of breath, I squeeze my busted tablet closer to my chest and swallow hard as the stranger slows to a stop and peers to the left. I hold my breath while he turns, confused. Then, he spots me and he pulls his brows together, making shadows pool in the hollows of his face.

He’s dangerous.

That much is clear.

In a slow movement, he reaches for the cord to his ear buds, and with a swift tug they fall. When all of his attention is on me, I notice immediately that the light shining down from an emergency post offers no real service. If I had to pick this man out of a police line-up tomorrow, I’d have no idea. The shadows make it impossible for me to get a proper look at his face.

I clear my throat in an attempt to drag up some confidence. “You broke my—”

He shoots forward and I squeal, dropping my tablet. The stranger’s large, heavy hands grab my shoulders and he shoves me to the side. I stumble and squeeze my eyes shut. I expect to slam into the large, metal warehouse beside me, but instead he catches me again, his fingers digging into the flesh on my arm with bruising pressure. He slams me into the warehouse and I grit my teeth, keeping my eyes tightly closed. My spine aches against the rigid metal and all I hear is the sound of my heart hammering relentlessly in my ears. Amongst it, I think I hear my brain chastising me, calling me an idiot.

“Are you out of your mind?” he bites out.

My lips part and I splutter as I open my eyes. I take in the man’s dark features, each curved in anger. His full lips purse over gritted teeth and his nostrils flare. I remain frozen with fear, paralyzed by the man who holds me against the wall. I don’t know this man. I don’t know his triggers or his intent. One wrong word or move and my life could end. His irises, their color undistinguishable in this light, flick over my face. He glances at my chest and I become hyperaware of the speed at which it rises and falls. I’ve never been so scared in my life.

I don’t love my life—not like most people do anyway. I’ve wanted off the earth a million times before, but now it’s a possibility I’ve never appreciated my life more—no matter how abysmal it is. The broken tablet is no longer on my mind. It’s not worth my life and I’ll forget about it—I’ll even leave it in the rubble if it means making it back to my apartment tonight.

After he’s done analyzing my terrified state the man backs away cautiously, with the palms of his hands exposed and I let out a shaky exhale, ignoring the tremors that threaten to shake me to my foundations. After a few short eternities, he arches a brow and I realize he wants me to speak—to explain myself. I swallow hard and it’s painfully dry.

“You broke my tablet,” I manage to croak out.

“Jesus Christ,” he huffs, pushing his hood off of his head and exposing short, spiky jet-black hair.

Even without his pressure, I remain glued to the metal wall, my heart pounding in my throat. I could run, but how far would I get? This man is quick, much quicker than me, and I’ve never been much of a runner. He rakes his fingers through his hair, pulling slightly. “You need to get out of here.”

I frown. Just like that? “You’re letting me go?”

He angles his head, allowing the shadows to swallow up his face. If I could imagine the expression he was pulling, it’d be a confused one, like mine. “I have no reason to keep you. If you’re smart, you’ll run as fast as you can.”

He doesn’t want to hurt me, and strangely, the thought fills me with confidence. Or maybe it’s desperation. I can’t study without my tablet. If I don’t study, I’ll fail and if I fail, I’ll have nothing left. “I’m not going anywhere. Not until you replace my tablet.”

The confidence doesn’t quite reach my voice, but at least I found the balls to bring up what he did. I can’t see his face, but I’m pretty sure I hear the smile on his lips.

“I broke your tablet?”

I nod, curling my fingers around the strap of my bag and twisting nervously. “On the train. You pushed past me coming out the doors and I dropped it.”

He folds his strong, thick arms tightly over his chest. “And you chased me into an abandoned industrial site? For what?”

I push off the wall. “To tell—”

“To demand I replace what I supposedly broke?”

With a nod, I sigh, exasperated. I need him to replace it. Without it, I have to go an hour or two out of my way to the library after my shifts and that’s not realistic for me. Of course, there’s no way I can force him to replace what he broke, but I’m hoping the universe gives me a break. Just this once. I need it.

Silence falls as he gives me an overt once over. I wonder what he sees. A small, desperate nurse who can’t even afford a comfortable pair of shoes? Or a liar? To him, I could be a crazy woman looking for a handout.

“You need crack money?” he asks, his voice dead serious.

“What?” I spit, inching forward. “No. I’m a nurse.”

“If you get your drugs for free, then what do you want with me?”

“I don’t need drugs. I—” I pause and let out an exasperated sigh. “All I want is for you to replace what you broke. So just fix it and I’ll be on my way.”

“What the fuck do you expect me to do?” He gestures around him, dramatically. “Do you see any electronic shops around here? Would any be open at this time?” He steps closer. “Look, lady, I’m not messing around. You need to get out of here before—”

He’s cut off by a loud clank that seems to vibrate up the entire height of the warehouse. The noise sounds creepy and dooming, and I’m sure it echoes for miles.

“What is that?” I ask, creeping closer to him.

His entire body is taut and tense, but in this moment I find more comfort in the huge stranger than the waking warehouse.

The stranger clears his throat. “That is your biggest mistake.”

The Warehouse

The stranger’s warm hand wraps around my exposed elbow and he tugs me behind him. If my heart was hammering before, now it pounds relentlessly, moving blood quicker than my body can keep up with. I let his large frame shield me from the endless clanking and curses coming from the enormous, delivery bay door. I pray the large man I followed into this industrial site is big enough to handle whatever comes out of it.

“Run,” he demands over his shoulder in a harsh whisper. “Now.”

He doesn’t have to tell me twice. I jolt away from him and immediately scan the ground for my tablet. Maybe repairing it will cost less than replacing. Thankfully, I spot it three feet to my right and I jump towards it. I bend low and scoop it up, not bothering to dust off the dirt.

But it’s too late.

Whatever he wanted me to run from drenches me in a bright light. Squinting, I lift my hand to block it, but it’s no use. I can’t see a thing. Eventually the spotlight falls away, illuminating the inside of the bare warehouse instead of my face. The man in charge of the spotlight is unlike anyone I’ve seen before. He’s huge and his facial scars…whoa.

Worried my stare will offend the man, I drop it to the battered gray tank that somehow manages to cover the large expanse of his chest. Still, I can’t keep my mind of his injuries. Whatever happened to his face must’ve hurt. I flick my attention back to his marred skin. It’s as if a whip with fifty ends had lashed him right across his flesh.

“Wasn’t expecting two of you, Stone,” he grumbles in a husky, baritone voice.

Two of us? He thinks we’re here together? Fuck no. I’m not being lumped in with him.

“Oh.” I step forward and the stranger, Stone, flinches toward me, the warning clear in his deep, ocean-like eyes.

Wow.

In the dark I didn’t see his face, but now, in the light, every corner of it is exposed, leaving no chance for a single shadow to obscure his features.

If I’d seen his face sooner, I never would have been so scared. Intimidated, maybe, but not scared. He’s easily the most attractive guy I’ve seen this side of the tracks—a strong jaw with subtle scruff, pink, full lips and by the looks of it, he has all of his teeth in his mouth.

Clearing my throat, I look back to the other man. “I’m not here with h—”

“Two,” Stone cuts in, stuffing one hand into the pocket of his baggy, black shorts. “That’s what I told Skull.” From his pocket, he pulls out two fat rolls of money and I gasp. “If you’ve got a problem with my money, take it up with him.”

The man surveys the money in Stone’s hand and so do I. I’ve never seen so much green. Each roll has to hold at least ten grand, easily.

The man I’ve decided to insensitively name ‘Scarface’ grins, exposing glistening pearly whites. Astonishing, given his appearance. “There’s no problem.”

He steps forward with open hands and Stone drops the dense rolls of money into his palms. Scarface weighs them in his grasp before eventually stuffing them into his pockets. Then his coal irises flick onto me. I almost flinch at the direct sight of him. As I look over his gnarly face, my own begins to ache. His gaze rakes me from head to toe and he seems amused by my deep purple scrubs. Normally I change after my shift, but I’d decided to skip on that tonight, willing to risk the germs I’ll bring home to my apartment. The way I see it is, whatever bacteria and bodily fluids are on my scrubs at the end of a long shift are undoubtedly on every surface of my home. It comes complimentary with a rental as cheap as mine.

“You sure your girl can handle herself down there?” Scarface asks, his stare stopping on my chest.

Pig.

I peer at Stone. Down where? Where are we going and why does he have to pay so much money to get there?

Stone’s eyes narrow in. “Don’t you worry about her. She’s meaner than she looks.”

His blue eyes clash with mine and I see through his words. I also see sympathy and frustration.

“Alright.” Scarface exhales, stepping aside. “You’re in.”

Stone reaches out and snags me by my elbow, making me drop my tablet once again. It crashes to the concrete floor, sending pieces darting in every direction. I wince as he digs in the tips of his fingers and pulls me into the entry of the warehouse. Struggling against him, I spare a glance over my shoulder. There’s no repairing my tablet now…there’s no passing my exam.

Stone tugs me hard against him, forcing my attention to the room. The ceiling is tall, tall enough to house a jetliner, and the windows are a shitty plastic you can’t see out of. It smells like blood and dead animals; not a big difference from outside, but noticeable enough. Right in the middle of the room I see two open, steel doors and I spot the first of many steps that descend into darkness. Where does it lead? What will we see at the bottom of those stairs and what did Stone pay so much money to get access to? I shiver at the thought.

“Please tell me we’re not going down there?” I whisper, pulling against his grip.

“That’s exactly where we’re going.”

I dig my heels in, desperate to free my arm from his grasp.

“Let me go!” I snap under my breath, clenching my jaw when his fingers tighten.

Fear and desperation curl in thick strands and wrap themselves around my stomach. I’m a second away from throwing up or passing out. This has to be a dream. A sick, confusing dream. With my free hand I slap at him, but he seems unfazed. I’m causing a scene in hopes of Scarface interfering and letting me leave. Surely he can tell I don’t want to be here? I hear Scarface laugh and now the thought seems stupid—wasted. Why would he care? I thrash violently, slapping with all my might. Black strands of hair fall from my ponytail and stick to my clammy forehead.

“Slapping? Really?” Stone hisses, restraining my arm. “Please tell me that’s not all you can do?”

What the hell does that mean? “Let me go! I know people! They’ll come looking for me!”

It’s a lie, of course, but I refuse to let the reality of my situation settle in. The reality is, if I die here, who would know? Who would come looking for me? I have no parents, no siblings, and no friends. My memory will fade away and it’ll make no difference to anyone except for the exam marker who will mark ‘non-attendance’ next to my name in a fortnight’s time, and the nurse who’ll be no doubt relieved she doesn’t have to babysit me on my next shift.

I blink away the tears that sting my eyes.

“Shut up,” he orders, his voice low and threatening. “You’re gonna get us both killed.”

“Got a problem there, Stone?”

Stone’s entire body tenses when Scarface speaks. Without a word, he dips low and I squeak as he wraps his arms around my legs and throws me over his shoulder. “No problem. She just realized she didn’t pack her new Jimmy Choos, that’s all.”

“No!” I shout, pounding my fists into his back. It’s a blatant lie. I would never forget to pack a pair of Jimmy Choos. Besides, it’s not like I can afford a brand of that caliber anyway. “Please!”

He ignores me while I squirm over his shoulder. I make no progress. Stone’s grip is tight, and he’s too strong to fight against. In this moment, I’m a mouse with my tail trapped underneath an elephant’s foot…I’m not going anywhere. Defeated, I slump and sob. Will anyone miss me? Will my face be plastered over milk cartons and billboards? Or will I become another number, a statistic, locked away in a police file and forgotten?

I close my eyes as we descend the stairs. When we reach the bottom, Stone carries me a few more feet before deciding to put me down. The second my shoes touch the floor, I swing at him. My fist connects with his mouth and the force tosses his head to the side. Shit! I hiss and clench my fist as pain  darts up my wrist and tingles in my elbow. Panicked, I dive for the stairs, but he catches the strap of my bag and yanks me back. I struggle against him like a dog on a leash and get nowhere. He swears under his breath before my stomach sinks. I feel the strap of my bag bite into my body and snap. For a split-second I free-fall until heavy, arresting hands grab my shoulders and push me back. He shoves me against the wall and I sob when the back of my skull smacks the pipe. The headache-inducing pain throbs over my scalp before settling in my eye sockets.

“Listen to me—”

I open my mouth to protest, but he clamps his hand over my lips. The salty taste of his skin creeps across the surface of my lips and onto the tip of my tongue. The tears that stung my eyes previously now trickle over the rim and wet my cheeks. I’m going to die.

“Listen,” he says. “You can’t escape this. You want out? Too fucking bad. You got yourself into this mess and now you have to get yourself out.”

Air rushes in and out of my nose as my chest heaves. Nausea makes awful twists and turns in the pit of my stomach and my entire body trembles. Never have I ever felt fear like this before. It’s almost debilitating.

“The last thing you want to do down here is draw attention to yourself. You need to act like you’re meant to be here. If you don’t, they’ll slit your throat and throw you into the sewer. By the time you wash up somewhere, your body will be too destroyed to identify. Do you understand?”

Despite my frenzied thoughts, I soak up his words. Still, they don’t resonate with me. Why can’t I leave? Stone waits a few seconds before he lets his hand fall away.

“I won’t tell anyone, please,” I beg, my voice as shaky as my hands. “I just want to go home.”

Sympathy softens his hard, ocean eyes and I know what he’s going to say before he says it. It’s in his expression—his body language.

“You can’t go home.”

Debt

I can’t…

I can’t go home…

The thought dries my throat.

My pulse jumps in tempo, my tummy clenches, and I have the awful desperate urge to throw up. Then it hits me—my phone. I can call the police. From my back pocket, I fish for my cell. When I pull it out and unlock the screen, the little bars in the top right corner are gone, replaced by a small circle with a line through it. My heart sinks.

“No reception down here. You might as well throw it away.”

There’s no reception…

Tears flood from my eyes and drop onto my cheeks. In anger, I swipe at them and stuff it into the side of my bag, ignoring Stone’s smug expression. I’m not a crier. I was seven the last time I actually shed a tear. It was winter and I’d waited outside the always-growing ‘children’s home’. I remember it like it was yesterday. I’d stood there nervously, squeezing the strap to my backpack with cold, bare hands. My new parents were supposed to pick me up just after lunch, but they never showed. I’d waited, shaking in my pink gumboots, for them to come and take me somewhere different, but they didn’t, and as snowflakes began to pool on the shoulders of my blue hoodie, I’d cried. I don’t know what had happened to them. As a child, things weren’t explained to me. Still, after days of uncontrollable crying, I’d promised myself I’d never cry over something I couldn’t change. This is one of those times, I can’t change what’s happening, but the tears won’t stop and I feel as insignificant as I did that day.

“Why?” I ask, uncaring that I sound desperate and scared. “Why can’t I leave? I said I wouldn’t tell anybody.”

“It doesn’t work like that, and Jesus, will you stop crying?” He flicks his tongue over his bottom lip with a frustrated lick. “You’ve stumbled across a big secret here and there’s no easy way out. I can’t force you to stay—and I won’t, not if it gets me killed too—but if you want to live, you’ll lick your wounds, Kitten, and hold back your damn tears.”

With a sniffle, I wipe my nose on my bare arm, collecting tears that flow from my nostrils, not my eyes.

“If you don’t, if you want to leave right now—” He points a long finger to the stairs he carried me down, “—you can climb back up those stairs and let Steve know you’ve changed your mind.”

Steve? Scarface’s name is Steve? I didn’t see that coming. Still, even though he has a friendly name I don’t inch toward the stairs, no matter how desperately I want to.

“What happens then? If I decide to leave?”

Stone shrugs his broad shoulders. “Steve can be a reasonable guy. I’m sure he’ll make your death quick and painless.”

He turns from me and heads down the dark tunnel, away from the stairs. I reach out for him, snagging the soft fabric of his hoodie, squeezing it between my fingers before he’s able to slip away. “Wait. My death? He’ll kill me?”

With a glance over his shoulder, Stone nods. “You know about this place now. You can’t unsee it, you can’t avoid it and you can’t talk about it.” His eyes darken and narrow in on me, forcing me to release his hoodie. “You don’t have a choice but to wait it out down here. You fight or you die. Maybe next time you’ll think twice about following a stranger from a train in the middle of the night.”

Fight? I can’t fight. I can barely lift a crate of medical supplies without complaining. A fight with me wouldn’t be much of a fight at all. I slump into myself. This is not how I envisioned this whole thing going. To be honest, I don’t know what I expected. I was only focused on the money and how little I had to worry about my own safety. “I just wanted you to fix what you broke…”

“Yeah, well, it doesn’t seem worth it now, does it?”

Lowering my chin, I shake my head. It’s not worth it at all.

“And you owe me ten grand, by the way.”

My brows pull together, confused. Ten-freaking-grand! “For what? Ruining my life?”

Stone gestures around him. “It’s not cheap to get into a place like this. It cost me ten thousand dollars to save your life.”

I fold my arms as a tingle of frustration slices through my chest. I’m surprised how quickly it replaces my panic and fear. I didn’t want this. There’s no way I’m paying him ten thousand dollars for getting me trapped underground. Let’s not mention the fact I have to fight my way out. On top of that, I’m going to lose my job and my apartment. He has ruined my life.

“You expect me to pull that kind of money from my ass? I followed you from a train at one a.m. to fix my tablet because I can’t afford it. It only costs one hundred dollars to fix a busted tablet screen and if I can’t afford that, what makes you think I can afford ten thousand dollars?”

“Because down here, you have the opportunity to win up to eighty thousand tax-free dollars.”

My ears prick up. Eighty thousand tax-free dollars? He leans in close until the earthy, intoxicating scent of his cologne is the only thing I smell. I never noticed it before, but now it’s over-powering—arousing, even. It seems all this talk about tax-free money is warping my priorities and making my thighs tingle. The dimly lit tunnel we’re standing in doesn’t scare me anymore. Instead, a slither of excitement coils around my spine. With eighty thousand dollars, I can haul my ass to Italy and never look back. I’ve always wanted to move to Italy, maybe work at a petite wood-fire pizza place and live in a small cottage made of stone. Sitting on my porch, I would overlook a vast vineyard while I sucked on feta stuffed olives and drank wine. Yeah, that’s the life I want.

“How?” I ask, suddenly a little eager to venture further underground. “How do you win eighty thousand dollars?”

Stone’s blue eyes brighten and the ghost of a smile tugs at the corner of his lips. “Money hungry, Kitten?”

I scowl, but I’m not about to deny it. If there’s a chance I can make my life a little easier, I’m not going to say no. “I’m starved, and stop calling me Kitten. It’s not my name.”

His slight smirk pulls wide and wolfish before he straightens his shoulders and disappears into the dark tunnel ahead. I wait for a few seconds, expecting him to tell me how to win the money, but he doesn’t. That’s when I realize he isn’t going to wait for me, either, and I jolt into action. I grab my bag and hug it close to my chest. Fear makes a quick reappearance. It twists my stomach and threatens to drag it south at a moment’s notice. I move swiftly and follow his movements, keeping my head low enough to graze the network of pipes above me. Eventually, above the smell of mold and dirt, I smell his cologne and I relax at the thought of having him close.

“There’s a low concrete edge here. Be—”

The concrete edge he’s talking about introduces itself to the top of my skull with an echoing thud. I dip low and rub at my forehead, gritting my teeth to ease the ache.

“Ow,” I snap in a hushed whisper.

“I told you there was a concrete edge,” Stone states, his voice filled with husky laughter. Asshole. “How hard did you hit it?”

I brush the tips of my fingers over the front of my pulsing skull. “I hit it pretty hard, but not enough to leave a bump, I hope.”

I have enough issues with my appearance as it is. I don’t need an egg on the middle of my head to make me feel worse. I’m not bad looking, not really, just…plain. I’ve never colored my hair and I don’t wear make-up. My eyes are a light brown, my lashes are short and my nose is a little on the pointy side. If I had more than eighty thousand dollars, maybe I’d look into new facial features or accentuating some of my strengths. For now, though, I’ll settle for Italy.

Keeping exceptionally low, I follow Stone through the channel. Eventually, after descending three lots of service stairs in utter darkness, he leads us into a wide, well-lit tunnel—one I can stand up in. Along the concrete, cockroaches the size of my palm scatter before squeezing themselves into tiny cracks and crevices. You’d think that for ten thousand dollars entry they’d find a better place to situate themselves other than the pipe system of an abandoned warehouse. All points of money aside, it’s an interesting place. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a system as big as this. These channels belong to an underground storm water system built to allow thousands and thousands of gallons of water through at any one time. If it storms, we’re dead.

Sticking close to Stone, I follow him down another tunnel. In the distance, I can hear muffled cheering and chanting. He follows it and it gets louder and louder until the very concrete I stand on vibrates beneath my shoes. My heart begins to pick up speed, pumping blood around my body faster than it can accommodate and my head spins as a result. I reach out and press the palm of my hand against the concrete to stabilize myself.

“Anxious?” Stone asks, peering over his shoulder with a hint of amusement on his lips.

I swallow my anxiety and brush off my hands. “No.”

In front of him, I notice another door. This one is makeshift. Pointless, really. Doors are supposed to keep things out—or in. This door, made of decaying driftwood, isn’t enough to keep out one of those gigantic cockroaches, let alone a person. I guess that’s why they have the brute upstairs, manning the entrance.

Out of the corner of my eye, I spot a large cockroach. I gasp as it skitters over the orange light and pushes itself through a crack in the door. I shudder. I’m not a hater of insects; in fact, I’m certain lots of different kinds of creepy crawlies reside in my apartment. Nonetheless, cockroaches have always bothered me.

Stone notices my distaste and shakes his head. “Get used to them. You’re going to be sharing the same space for a while.”

“Courtesy of you,” I spit back.

He angles his large body in my direction and towers over me. His intense, blue eyes zero in on mine and I can’t look away. He’s terrifying. “I saved your life.”

“Temporarily. In case you haven’t noticed, we’re in an underground storm water system. All it takes is one large dump of water and we’re both dead.”

Keeping his stare on my face, he thumps his fist against the door. “Afraid of a little water, Kitten? Drowning should be the least of your worries.”

I purse my lips as he stares me down. Next to us, the door opens, but neither of us acknowledges it. I’ve never had a submissive personality. My entire life I’ve had to fight for the things I wanted and when I got them, I never let them go easily. That’s not about to change. I can sense the control in him too. He needs it like I do, but I believe I have the advantage. I deal with needy, spoilt patients, day in and day out. He can’t crack me.

“I’m not afraid,” I challenge him, squaring my shoulders. “And stop calling me Kitten. My name is—”

Beside us, a man clears his throat, startling me. I’m first to break eye contact and look at the man who opened the door. He seems normal enough—average height, lean build, no distinct facial scars and his brown hair is cropped just below his ears. As I analyze him, I can feel Stone watching me with his piercing eyes.

“Jai?” the man states, confused. “I thought you were coming alone.”

If Jai is his name, what’s Stone? His nickname?  Speaking of which, I need to clear up the nickname situation and fast, before everyone knows me as ‘Kitten.’ The thought turns my stomach.

“He was,” I state, smoothing the palms of my hands down my shirt to rid them of a clammy sweat. “But then I happened.” I extend my hand to the man. “I’m Emily.”

Cautiously, he watches my hand for a few awkward seconds before giving it a quick shake. His dark, green eyes survey me, taking in every detail. He’s unimpressed; I can tell. It’s not a foreign look; I get it all the time.

“You don’t look like an Emily.”

I frown. “No?” I ask, unable to hide my agitation.

What the hell does that mean? Is there a certain way I’m supposed to look? Are other Emilys tall? Athletic? Blonde?

“I don’t think she looks like an Emily either,” Jai chimes in, leaning against the concrete wall.

There’s a grin on his face, one that both annoys and intrigues me.

“Don’t you dare say it,” I warn him and his eyes flare.

“She’s feisty, playful and scared of a little water.” Jai feigns thought, angling his head to the side to get a better look at me. “She looks like more of a...Kitten. Don’t you think, Marcus?”

The man at the door, Marcus, snorts and smiles widely. “Sure does.”

“You’re both assholes,” I deadpan, trying my hardest not to let my aggression surface.

If I don’t make a big deal about it, maybe it’ll go away. Marcus’s green irises flick over me once more, this time analyzing me a little more intimately. I feel naked, as if his stare has stripped me bare, but Jai doesn’t notice. And if he did, why would he care?

“How long you think she’ll last?”

Jai shrugs. “A few minutes—maybe.”

“So I should bet against her, then?”

I stand still, shocked that they’re having a conversation like this in front of me. It’s like I’m not even here. I’m not going to lie; I’m a competitive person. I don’t like losing, no matter what it is, and the fact they think I can’t win makes me want to prove them wrong.

Jai doesn’t answer straight away. Instead, he rakes his teeth over his bottom lip and thins his eyes, pondering his answer.

“I wouldn’t bet against her,” he states, surprising me. “But I wouldn’t throw all of my money down for her to win either.”

Marcus nods and steps aside. No more words are exchanged and Jai enters in through the door. I follow him, doing my best to slip by Marcus without making eye contact. Although normal enough, there’s something unsettling about him.

A distinct groan and a loud cheer echoes down the tunnels. It vibrates through my body, sending my heart racing. What are we walking in to?

It doesn’t take long for me to figure it out. We follow the tunnel for another twenty yards before it veers off to the left. The roar of people somewhere in the tunnel is loud, almost ear-piercing.

“You ready?” Jai shouts over his shoulder as he comes to a stop.

Bright lights filter in from the end of the tunnel and chains rattle and men grunt as flesh connects with flesh. My skin prickles with the sensation of a million ants and energy frissons through me, zipping like lightning all over my body. I’m breathless and I haven’t seen it yet—whatever it is. Jai reaches out and grips my arm. I move with no resistance as he tugs me in front of him and nudges me closer to the end of the tunnel. I swallow in a breath of heavy air and expel it slowly. My body is excited, coiled and aroused by the anticipation of it all. Even my nipples strain hard against the fabric of my bra. What am I going to see? What have I become a part of and why do I suddenly crave it so badly?

I pause at the edge of the tunnel, not daring to peek out. From where I’m standing, I see glistening men and women, smelling of sweat and sex. They’re cheering at something, something that rattles and clashes with metal. I cringe as chains strain and flesh becomes bruised. Jai plants a heavy hand on my hip, and immediately, I become hyperaware of it. His pulse radiates into my skin and I shut my eyes for a moment, hypnotized by the sound of complete chaos.

Above us, a city sleeps, but down here, anarchy rules.

The Underground

It’s a cage. And it’s hanging over a massive tunnel by rusty fucking chains. It’s the first thing I see when Jai pushes me further out of the tunnel. The cage rattles and swings as two men smash their fists into each other’s faces. They duck and roll, kick and punch, and every time they do the cage shudders and creaks. Jai talks in my ear, but I don’t hear him, only my heart. It beats like a drum in my head as the metal box of death bounces, threatening to snap and send them both plummeting to their death at any second. At least one hundred people fill the surprisingly large area. Men and women of all sizes lean against concrete pillars and hang from unstable bars. Small trails of water trickle down from surrounding tunnels and pour into the large one in the middle—the one the cage swings above. I can smell blood and rust mixed in with sweat and mold. The dust in the air is heavy, clinging to damp skin and refusing to drop off. Specks of it settle in my lungs and tickle my nostrils, but I don’t care. It makes me feel alive, like the life I was living thirty minutes ago was all a ruse. The pores on the surface of my skin tingle and vibrate, urging me to take off my clothes and feel the dirtiness of this place on my naked body. My clothes suffocate me and my heavy bag pulls on me, making my muscles ache. I slam into the large expanse of Jai’s back. Groaning, I stumble backwards and catch his brief look of frustration. The way he furrows his brows at me forces me from my stupor.

“Most of you know me,” a deep, baritone voice announces.

That’s when I realize the entire room, if I can call it that, is silent. Even the fighters in the cage pause their fight to hear him speak.

“But for those who don’t, my name is Skull.”

My ears prick up at the mention of Skull, and I follow Jai’s hostile stare up to a small concrete ledge. Three men stand on it, looking down at us as if we’re nothing but cockroaches. Two of them stand with staunch postures on either end of the ledge, their arms folded tightly over their chests. And the one in the middle, Skull, is as terrifying as his name paints him to be. The black ink on his face is exactly what his name states.

Skull.

His face is a skull.

I’ve seen it once before on the Internet somewhere, but never in person. I didn’t know there was someone else, somewhere, crazy enough to do something so…so permanently scary.

“You all know how this goes; you’ve all seen Fight Club, but just in case the message wasn’t clear…”

One of the staunch Russian-looking men pulls a smaller man out on to the ledge. He whimpers and begs, but Skull ignores him. The small man’s lean, tattoo-less body makes him look almost innocent beside Skull and his goons.

“I won’t tell anybody, I swear,” the scared man pleads. “Please, I was just out for a late-night walk. I don’t want to cause any trouble.”

His light brown hair sticks to his forehead and his eyes are wide, so wide I’m sure they’re going to fall from his head at any second.

“Sorry, mate,” Skull says, his strangely sophisticated Australian accent shining through. He slings an arm over the man’s shoulder and forces him to lean slightly over the railing. “Can’t risk it.”

“What’s going on?” I whisper to Jai, dragging my stare onto his face.

He gives me a side-glance, one that sends dread burrowing through my stomach. “You’ll see.”

I don’t need further explanation. My lips part as my heart stutters. They’re going to kill him? The crowd surrounding us roars to life and the sudden uproar startles me. I look up in time for Skull to finish dragging the sharp edge of his knife through the pleading man's flesh. I gasp and cover my mouth as blood gushes out of his throat and rolls down his chest. I barely have time to catch my panicked breath in my hands before Jai’s fingers curl around my wrist and he forces my limb back to my side.

Murder. Holy shit. I’ve just witnessed murder.

The thought sticks to my insides like tar. I’ve seen death many times—working in a hospital puts you directly in the face of it...but this is different. In hospital, it’s life, an everyday situation. Here, it’s wrong—unnatural, even.

Skull doesn’t speak as the man bleeds out. The crimson liquid slows to a dribble. It drips off the metal railing and into the small trickle of water that runs underneath the cage before disappearing into the large, and probably bottomless, tunnel. Eventually, the cheering dies down and Skull finally lifts his eyes to address us once more.

“You’re all part of a secret brotherhood that has gone unnoticed for a hundred years. Most of you know the guidelines, but I see some new faces in the crowd tonight.” His black eyes flick over me and I inch closer to Jai as they pause and come back to settle on my face. “For those who aren’t familiar with how I run things, let me let you in on three simple rules. One.” He grips the dead man’s hair and pulls his head back until the slice in his throat is on display. I’m the only one in the room who shudders. “Don’t talk about it.”

Skull grabs the man by the back of his shorts and tosses him over the railing like rubbish. His lifeless body slaps against the concrete. The sound chills my blood and sends it burning underneath my skin, but I don’t let my gaze fall from Skull’s. I don’t want him to know I don’t fit in here—that I’m here by accident. The way he stares at me, though, makes me feel like I have it branded on my forehead in bright red ink.

Skull wipes the wet blade he used to cut the innocent man’s throat against his white T-shirt. Angry red stripes paint the fabric, but he doesn’t care.

“Two; don’t kill anyone outside of the cage. And three; you fight when it’s your turn, or you die.”

I swallow hard. I have to fight? That’s how I’ll make the money? I’ve only been in two fist fights in my entire life—both when I was thirteen, and I lost.

“Until the rounds end, this place is your home, this brotherhood your family. Fight well and you shall be rewarded. Lose and you’re out on your ass with no money in your pocket, and no respect from your brothers or sisters.”

I fight the urge to slump into myself as Skull finally frees me from his dark glare. He lets his glower drag over the scattered crowd with malicious warning before turning and disappearing through a smaller service tunnel with his goons in tow.

It’s silent for a moment and I can’t hear my heartbeat. For a second, the only sound I hear is the unsteady trickle of water as it patters against the mossy concrete, and the creak of the rusty chains that strain under the weight of the fighters. I turn toward Jai and open my mouth to demand he kill me now—I’m dead, anyway—but the sudden sound of bone smashing into flesh beats the words off my tongue, forcing them to remain in my throat. As the crowd starts up again, Jai snags my elbow and tugs me through the horde of eager fighters. I keep my head low and my shoulders up, but I’m still clipped by hard elbows and loose hands. By the time we reach a clearing on the other side, I’ve taken more hits to the head than a footballer and a killer headache brews at the base of my skull.

“You’ll stay with me,” Jai orders, stuffing a rogue earpiece from his iPod into the pocket of his hoodie.

“Like hell I will.” I force my slipping bag up underneath my arm.

I don’t know what I’ll do without Jai, but staying with him opens doors for more problems. He’s the reason I’m in this mess in the first place.

Jai glares over my shoulder from underneath his brow and I return it without hesitation. It takes me a few seconds to realize he isn’t glaring at me, but at something behind me. Slowly, I crane my neck to look over my shoulder. I smell vodka and ass before I see the face that breathes it. And what a face it is.

“Fine,” Jai simpers. “If you don’t want to stay with me, you can stay with him.”

I recoil at the thought and inch closer to Jai. It seems facial tattoos are a growing trend. The foul-smelling, private-space invader licks at the spider tattooed on the corner of his mouth, and strangely, I feel sorry for it. No one or thing should be touched by this man’s tongue. I peer up at Jai and manage to conjure my most convincing ‘help’ look. I can’t stay with creepy spider man; I just can’t. With a sigh, Jai flicks his hand at the stranger.

“Beat it, asshole.”

The ‘asshole’ lingers for a long second, his beady blue eyes flicking between Jai and me. When Jai steps forward, his spine straight and shoulders squared, the man smirks and quickly turns on his heel. I don’t realize I’m holding my breath until Jai pushes past me and steps up onto a ledge. Clasping my bag tightly under my arm, I let the air out and follow closely behind him. It’s clear now. Without Jai, I’ll be eaten alive.

***

Jai dumps his heavy backpack onto a flimsy, pea-green cot and, surprisingly, the worn mesh doesn’t give out under its weight. He turns his back to me as he unzips his hoodie. I stand at the doorway, gaping at the size and state of the room. Granted, I shouldn’t have expected more than a tiny cranny tucked away in a small service way of an underground water system, but still...these people paid ten thousand dollars to be here and there isn’t even a door to protect their privacy? What a rip-off.

“Wipe that look off your face. You’re underground, not at the Hilton,” Jai murmurs over his shoulder. “You can live in luxury when you’re out of here. You’ll probably appreciate it more.”

I pout. “Sadly, this isn’t that much of a step down from my apartment…”

And it isn’t. My apartment is tiny, so tiny the bed folds out of the wall and hits my kitchen bench. The smell, warm mold and dirt, isn’t a far cry from home either.

“You should feel right at home then,” Jai says, slipping out of his hoodie.

I lean against the damp concrete wall and watch the muscles in his back as his tight, black tank exposes all of its rises and depressions. At least one of us isn’t going to die in the cage. Jai has more muscle in one of his shoulders than I do in my entire body. He could take on six in the cage if he really wanted to. Jai squeezes between the two cots as he bunches his hoodie into a ball and drops it at the head of his cot to use as a pillow. In one swift move, he tugs off his black tank and the sudden nakedness of his torso takes my breath away. There’s barely a second for my brain to register his clean, lean form before he drapes the tank top over the murky, orange light above his bed. The semi-well lit room becomes difficult to see in so I sigh and move towards my own cot. It creaks and complains underneath my weight. The mesh tightens and I brace myself for a second, certain I’m going to crash through it and hit the floor.

I don’t.

When I’m sure the cot can handle my weight, I toss my bag onto the floor and pull my knees into my chest. Jai’s cot makes more noise than mine as he lowers himself into it. He moves quickly, less afraid of tearing it than I was.

When he’s comfortable, it’s quiet in our space. Too quiet. The sounds of laughter and cheering further down the tunnel echo clearly and it sets me on edge. The air is heavy, not allowing me to take a fresh breath of air and whenever I blink, I see the man’s sliced throat. I swallow, but it does nothing to quench my dry throat. I’m not going to survive down here, and the thought is...well, it’s fucking terrifying.

“How are you holding up, Kitten?”

His genuine-sounding question breaks the torturing silence. It’s a question I haven’t thought about yet. I haven’t allowed it. I didn’t want to freak myself out, but truth be told, I’m not holding up well at all.

“I’m deep underground somewhere, and I witnessed the murder of an innocent man within the first ten minutes of arriving. To get out, I have to physically fight someone God knows how many times, and, to top it off, I’m in more debt than I’ve ever been in in my life.” I rake my fingers through my hair. “I’m not okay. I don’t fit in here and they’re going to realize it eventually. Then what? When Skull finds out he’ll cut my throat and toss me over the railing and into the bottomless tunnel without explanation.”

Jai shifts on his bed. “As far as Skull’s concerned, you paid to be here just like everyone else. Sure, you didn’t get the official invite, but if you keep your head down and pretend you know what you’re doing, you’ll be fine.”

Tears burn my eyes and I bite down on my tongue to stop them from spilling, but they insist. The force behind them is too much, so I let them fall. I let them silently wet my cheeks and roll across my dry lips. “Skull knows. He was glaring at me. He knows.”

“Skull doesn’t know shit,” Jai spits, his distaste for Skull coming through loud and clear. “He likes to intimidate people, that’s all. You have a kind face—like a kitten. He wanted to scare you.” Jai lets out a heavy exhale when a sniffle from me gives away the fact I’m crying. “Look, I’ll help you, okay? I can’t do much, but I’m sure there’s something I can teach you before your fight rolls around.”

I swipe my arm across my face. “Why would you help me? After everything I’ve done?”

He ponders for a second and I wish I could see his face, read his emotions. “Because even though you’re a giant pain in my ass and a distraction from my goal, you seem like a good person.”

Of their own accord, the corners of my lips twitch.

“And you owe me ten grand, which I’m going to need back as soon as possible,” he adds, forcing my twitch to fall.

Jai rolls on his bed, turning his back to me. It’s clear that conversation time is over. I drop my head into my knees and hug my legs, unable to find the energy to properly set myself up and lie down. I figure it’s no different. Sitting or lying, I’m not getting any sleep tonight.

Trash

My eyes shoot open as a loud squeal pierces my eardrum and vibrates over the surface of my brain. Light footsteps and a girly giggle as two people sneak past our little nook. I rub my heavy, aching eyes as the two laugh and speak in flirtatious tones. Naturally, when he catches her, their not-so-quiet dirty talk echoes down the tunnel. It’s so clear, they might as well be speaking directly into my ear. Privacy is something you just don’t have down here and I wonder if they know the people who sleep in this tunnel can hear him tell her how badly he wants to put it in her ass.

It turns out, despite my uneasiness last night, I fell asleep. I’m not surprised. I’d worked an eleven-hour shift at the hospital prior to the stunt that landed me down here. I was exhausted before I’d stepped foot on the train. When I’d finally sat down on my bed, my body gave in and a dreamless sleep took over me. Yawning, I check the small, silver fob watch pinned to the breast pocket of my plum shirt. It reckons it’s nine a.m. but I can’t tell. The light is the same now as it was when I fell asleep. It’s only been a few hours, but there’s an endless list of things I’d do to see the sun again, or smell fresh air.

My cot bounces slightly and I jump as an unnoticed Jai dumps a heap of clothes onto the end of it. Pieces of small fabrics cover my worn shoes and I eye them wearily. Eventually, I glance up at him and he hands me a small bread roll. He looks refreshed—much more refreshed than I do, I’m sure.

“I figured you’re going to melt in those scrubs so I went out and got you some other stuff. Breakfast is also finished, but I managed to secure you a bread roll.”

He went out and got me some other stuff? What does that even mean? It’s not like there’s a clothing store down here. Biting into the somewhat stale bread, I reach for a piece of black fabric and hold it up. It’s a halter neck, one that isn’t long enough to cover my belly button. “Jesus, did you fight a toddler for these?”

His full, pouty lips widen into an amused smirk. “The girls down here aren’t exactly the kind of girls you’re used to. That’s the best I could do.”

“I’m not wearing these.”

He steps forward, his hands planted firmly on his hips and the previous quirk in his lips gone. “I arm-wrestled four guys and two women to get you these clothes. You’re going to wear them, even if I have to dress you myself.” Jai nods at the clothes. “You look like an idiot down here in your scrubs. These are low-key. You’ll blend right in.”

“I—”

“Put them on,” he orders, moving to stand guard at the entrance with his back to me. “They’re starting the first round of fights.”

Scoffing, I drop the piece of fabric and let the bread slip from my hand “Have fun with that.”

I’m not going to lie, the thought of seeing what I saw in the cage yesterday enthralls me. My toes curl in my shoes just thinking about it, but I’m not wearing any of these clothes. No way. I’ve always been a more conservative kind of girl. Call me old-fashioned, but a covered vagina and an unexposed belly button is sexier.

“Holy shit.” Jai groans, dragging his hands over his face. “Does everything have to be such a fucking mission with you? God. Don’t wear the black top then, I’m sure you can find something else in the pile I brought you. ”

When I don’t move towards the clothes, Jai grits his jaw and surges forward. His large hands toss clothes all around the room until eventually, he throws a pair of jean shorts and a white tank at me. I hold them up. I don’t particularly like denim...I open my mouth to protest, but Jai quickly closes the distance. I squeak in surprise and push against the heavy hands that grip my shoulders, but I’m useless to stop him. His immovable body pins me against the cot. Somehow, he’s managed to catch my wrists and he squeezes them tightly as he pins them beside my head.

“Get off!” I growl, trying desperately to struggle free.

My lungs are already having a hard time filling themselves with air. With his weight on top, I’m sure to suffocate.

“One more word,” he warns me. His voice is low and coarse, sending a tidal wave of shivers down my spine. “If one more word I don’t like falls from your pretty little mouth, I’ll throw you into the tunnel myself.”

I hear him loud and clear, but ‘pretty,’ ‘little’ and ‘mouth’ are the only words that register Naturally, my attention falls to his lips. I’ve never seen a more enticing pair. My insides turn to liquid and I feel light, as if I’m floating on water. I’ve felt this feeling before. I was twenty-one and I’d spent my birthday drinking my ass off at a new bar that had just opened up three blocks from the tired hostel I lived in. Long story short, I’d met a guy and I’d felt this feeling. Not long after, we were having sex in the alley, and when it was over, I never saw him again. Not my proudest moment, but it happened.

“Your daddy would have a heart attack if he saw the way you’re staring at my lips right now, Kitten”

Lightning flashes up my veins and zips to my heart in record time, forcing it to pump blood faster. Him and the way his pupils have darkened entrances me. I think about revealing the fact that I don’t have a father, but I do, somewhere. I have a mother, too; I’ve just never met her. It’s only me in my world. No one else.

“My father is the last person you should worry about.”

He’s smiling at me now, but there’s something raw and hungry in his eyes. “A protective older brother then?”

I shake my head. I guess I’m not going to be able to keep that part of my life from him.

“I’m an orphan.”

The sexy, sultry look that glazed itself over Jai’s features melts away. His grip on my wrists loosens, and the weight of his body becomes bearable. Still, the feeling vibrating in the lower portion of my body remains strong.

“Shit. I’m sorry.”

I let out a small, nervous laugh. “For what?”

His head angles a few degrees. “For bringing it up.”

I shrug as best I can. “It had to come up sooner or later. If you’re worried you’ve upset me, don’t be. You can’t be upset over something you never had.”

It’s a lie. I think about my non-existent family every day. It’s confusing to be so emotionally mixed up over something you’ve never known. What does a mother’s love even feel like? How does it feel to be disciplined by your father or teased by your sibling? I don’t know. I wish I did, but I don’t, and it’s not the fact I don’t know my mother or father that bothers me. It’s the fact a woman was able to carry me in her belly for nine months and go through so much pain to bring me into this world only to hand me over as soon as she saw me. Am I that unbearable? Was I, even as an infant?

I defend my absent mother a lot. When I’m feeling particularly bitter about my life my mind begins to pick on her, but not long after, my heart rushes to her defense. Maybe she was too young? Maybe she was forced to have me? Maybe it just wasn’t the right time or with the right person? When I’m being rational I get it, but when I’m down, it crushes me.

This time, it’s Jai’s stare that falls onto a pair of lips—my lips—and self-consciously, I lick them. As he studies each one, my heart shudders pleasantly in my chest. This has to be the weirdest situation in the world. I mean, he practically kidnapped me, yet here we are. I haven’t been touched in so long. In fact, it’s been such a long time I was beginning to think I’d never have sex again. I didn’t crave it. I didn’t even think about it, but, pinned underneath the body of a man who could, quite possibly, be the death of me, all I can think about is the touch of his lips. There’s no door to shield us from the people who pass by, but I don’t care—not like I would have ten minutes ago.

“Will you wear the shorts?” he asks, his voice quiet, soft and smooth.

I nod, focusing more on the undertone of his voice and how it makes me crave warm chocolate than his question. I blink a few times, and just like that, he’s off me, guarding the door again.

“Wait.” I utter, pushing myself up on my elbows. “That’s it?”

Looking at the side of his face I see the ghost of a smile play along his lips, but he doesn’t turn to make eye contact.

“Get dressed, Emily. We’ve only got a few minutes before the fight starts.”

Dazed, and a little confused by the use of my real name, I shuffle off the cot and ignore the ache in my back as I stand. The cot isn’t the ideal place to sleep, but it’s smoother than the mattress that folds out of the wall back home. At least there are no springs stabbing me in my organs here.

I glance down at the denim shorts and white tank top in my hands. I’m going to look ridiculous in this. Thank God it’s dark down here or everyone would see just how white I really am—and when was the last time I shaved my legs? I cringe at the thought.

In record time, I pull off my scrubs and toss them into the corner of the room. I struggle trying to pull the shorts on over my black shoes, but thankfully, when I sit down on the edge of my cot I manage to put both feet through without much hindrance. Most people take their shoes off before putting pants on, but there’s no way in hell I’m putting my bare feet on the damp ground.

Surprisingly, the jean shorts button up well and fit nicely. I run my finger around the band at the top and peer at my ass from over my shoulder. It doesn’t feel like my cheeks are hanging out. I run the palm of my hands down the back of the shorts to confirm it. My ass isn’t showing. Who would’ve thought they still make denim short shorts that cover the butt? It’s a miracle. When I look back up, I see two blue irises flick over my belly and onto my chest. I freeze, unable to help my eyebrows that pull together of their own accord. Though caught in the act, Jai doesn’t look away. Instead, his stare follows an invisible line up my cleavage, my throat and onto my face. Of course I wore my least attractive bra. Why not the lace one? Why did I choose the one made from cotton? My throat dries, my cheeks burn, and my fingers twitch at my sides, but I don’t cover myself up. I analyze his face, but he gives off no indication if my body is to his liking. Not that I want it to be...or maybe I do. I don’t know. I’ve never been so confused in my life.

Without a word, Jai turns back to peer into the tunnel.

“You’re a pervert.” I tease, arranging the tank top in my hands before pulling it on over my head.

He doesn’t look back, but I hear his smile as he speaks. “I prefer the term ‘opportunist’.”

I straighten the tank against my belly. It clings tightly to me, and the lack of nutrition in my diet shows. Hip bones...this is why I wear baggier clothes. I’m actually surprised my breasts have held up. I smooth my palms over my stomach and suck in an inhale. When I blow it out, Jai turns and this time, his eyes skip over my chest and lock onto my hair.

“Ready?” I ask, stuffing my hands into my pockets.

“Almost.”

He steps forward and I hold my breath as he reaches out and tugs on the band holding back my locks. With a swift yank, he frees my black waves and they fall around my face. I feel little as he rakes his giant hands through my hair and I’m not sure if I’m imagining it, but every now and then he’ll catch some between his fingers and squeeze until my lips part and a nervous breath of air slips out. Whatever he’s doing, it feels erotic. If it were normal, my blood wouldn’t be heating the way it is and my pulse wouldn’t threaten to beat through my skin.

I open my mouth to speak, but Jai turns around and steps out into the tunnel.

“Let’s go.”

***

The cage rattles and shakes, and my heart leaps into my throat. The slap of limbs on the canvas and grunts forced from lungs penetrate the roars of the crowd. I’ve never seen anything so gritty, so magnificent. Excitement prickles over the surface of my skin like electricity on metal, but beside me, Jai sits against the wall of the tunnel, toying with a loose string on the sleeve of his shirt. How can he be bored by the action unfolding in front of us? He’s used to it, I suppose, but this is an entirely new world for me. A world that’s terrifying and exhilarating all at once. Every few seconds, when the fighters give themselves a quick breather, my attention flickers to the railing above the cage and the thick fingers that grip it. Skull shifts as my eyes flick over his hands, resting his elbows on the rail and leaning over to get closer to the fight. As the fighters clash and crash against the canvas again, I let my gaze move to Skull’s face and the detailed skull that stains it. I can see every bone, and every space is colored a coal black. For a moment, I find myself captivated by it—mesmerized. He is easily the scariest thing I’ve ever seen and although yesterday’s events no longer mark his skin, I feel as though I can still see the innocent man’s blood on his hands. Though scary, I can’t help but wonder if he’s ever loved a woman and what a smile might look like on his lips. I wonder what color his eyes glisten when he’s fallen in love…

I look back to the fighters who are both standing on jelly legs and exchanging heavy punches, blow for blow. One fighter, with slightly more energy than the other, ducks an incoming punch. It swings over his head, sending his opponent off balance. He wastes no time in straightening his posture and throwing a hammering punch to his chin. I gasp and shield my mouth as the opponent’s arms flail and his face snaps to the side. I see it in his eyes, the glazed look, and suddenly his head is heavier than the rest of his body. My heart pounds in my chest, in my head, in my throat—everywhere—and I can’t help but inch closer. Subconsciously, I reach back and touch Jai’s arm to steady myself as I step forward. I use him as security, in case I need to be pulled back at a moment’s notice. The dazed man sways like a tree in the wind before crashing to the canvas.

The room goes silent.

He doesn’t move.

The only sounds are the straining of the thick chains that rub against the metal railings, and the tiny passages of rain water that drip onto the concrete around us. My mouth is open, my eyes wide. I’ve never seen a knockout before.

Everyone else jumps to life, cheering the victor. The sudden surge of celebration startles me and I jump backwards, desperately clinging to Jai’s arm. The uproar vibrates the floor under my feet. I feel it in the rubber of my shoes and in the fabric of my socks before it climbs my legs. I pant, unsure if I should cheer or cry. My chest hurts, burning like I’ve smoked an entire packet of cigarettes and I realize it’s not because of the crowd. It’s because of the man that lies unconscious on the floor of the cage.

That could be me.

That will be me.

I survey him a little longer. There’s something not quite right about him. He’s still...dead still. I don’t notice two of Skull’s men, the ones from yesterday, approach the cage until they unlock the door and the winner leaps out. He clenches his torso and puts on a brave face, but it’s not enough to hold back the contents of his stomach. I cringe and look away as yellow bile spews from his mouth. Ignoring him, the goons step into the cage, unbothered that it bounces and trembles under their weight. At any second, the chains could snap. I think I’m the only one who cares.

The men reach down and slap the man on the face. He doesn’t move. They peer up at Skull briefly before testing his pulse. I keep my attention on Skull and all it takes is a shake of his head and the goons scoop up the unconscious man. When they have all of his weight in their arms, I notice a slight trail of blood leak from his mouth and nose. My blood runs cold. Is he...dead?

Outside the cage, the two men pull him higher in their arms. I expect them to carry him somewhere, to a little nook in a tunnel with someone that can help him—like a little healing bay or something. Instead, Skull announces that sometimes it doesn’t always work out and reminds us it’s a dangerous game.

And then they toss him over the edge and into the tunnel like week-old trash.

Like fucking trash.

Subversion

I pace the room, taking three steps each way before having to turn again. Jai watches me from the doorway, his arms folded tightly over his chest. He thinks I’m overreacting. He treats me as if I’m the only one who finds it appalling they tossed away the loser of the fight like he was nothing.

“He was dead already, Emily.” He sighs, apparently sick of saying it. “The punch was too much. There’s nothing anyone could’ve done.”

Silent tears burn down my cheeks and I hug myself tighter. “He probably has family...they’re never going to know what happened to him.” I inhale sharply. “What if he has a wife? Or children? They’ll grow old thinking their father left them without explanation.”

“If he was down here, he did leave without explanation.”

I stop pacing and glare at Jai. “Do you have any compassion? A human being died and he was treated like trash.”

Then, realization dawns on me, and all of the emotion I feel, all of the fear and outrage swirling around in my chest, drains out through my shoes. Even my tears dry up.

“I’m going to die down here and they’re going to throw me away.”

Jai rolls his ocean-blue eyes. “You’re not going to die.”

“I am.”

Why does he think I’m being dramatic? I have no fighting experience yet here I am, trapped underground with fighters and the only way out is to win, lose or die.

“How does it work, anyway? Do they go alphabetically? By size? Draw straws?”

“It’s random. Skull has Marcus choose a male and female and then they choose their opponent.”

I frown. “So there’s no real structure to it?”

He shakes his head.

“Shit. Look at me. I’m an easy win.”

I could be called to fight at any second and I have no idea how to throw a punch or how to block one. I’m as good as dead.

I’ve never been a dramatic person. I’ve always been detached from my life, ready for it to end at any second and be okay with it, but not like this. There’s no dignity in dying like this.

“You will be fine. How many times do I have to say it?”

“You said it yourself, Stone. I’ll last a few minutes—maybe.”

“And maybe you will, but don’t forget, if you play it right, it can take a second to win a fight.” He pushes off of the wall and saunters closer. “So you don’t have any technique or strength. Big deal.”

Gee, thanks.

“You have speed and logic on your side. Most fighters are trained to think one way, and one way only: win, at all costs. They’ll take a single look at you and go for the knock out, completely bypassing ground game and submissions. If you don’t panic and learn a little about position and evasive techniques, I think you’ll do just fine—or, you won’t die, at the very least.”

He stands a foot away from me, hands placid at his sides. I wonder if he’d still offer to help me if I didn’t owe him ten thousand dollars. If by some freaky chance I managed to win back the money, would he dump me on my ass to fend for myself? Or would he continue to help me? He said he has a goal down here and that I’m a distraction. What’s his goal? To win money? What does he need that kind of cash for? It seems he has plenty of it. All of his clothes are branded with top-end sports logos, his little music player is Apple, and let’s not mention the twenty thousand dollars he casually pulled out of his pocket for us to be accepted. He doesn’t need eighty thousand dollars.

“You want to help me?”

His jaw tightens for a few seconds before he relaxes it. “You owe me money and I need it back.”

Intrigued, I angle my head. “What do you need it for?”

Jai’s blue eyes darken and in this light, they appear black. “What does it matter? It was mine to begin with.”

Slowly, I join a little piece of it together. “Money can’t be what you’re here for. If you were in desperate need for money, you wouldn’t have wasted ten thousand of it on me.”

His dark eyes flare as he squares his shoulders to tower over me. Normally, I’d cower at such a sight, but right now, I’m making progress. I need to know just whom I’m being associated with.

“Careful, Kitten. My business is the last thing you want to paddle around in.”

The way he says it intrigues me. Maybe I want in on the danger. Next, I recall the way he was looking at Skull. Everyone else watched him with absolute adoration, but not Jai. I saw his distaste. I felt his anger. There’s something much bigger going on here.

“I saw the way you were looking at Skull.”

His poker face remains fierce and firm and I briefly wonder if he’s ever been in the army. The way he holds himself feels...disciplined.

“I saw the way you were looking at him too. You like the skull? It turns you on?”

Fire rushes in to my face, painting me red before settling in my cheeks. His tattoo might intrigue me, but I’d never go as far as to say it turned me on.

“I may have been a little curious,” I admit, not that it’s any of his business. “But Skull is a disgusting human being. His lack of compassion for human life overshadows any freaky fetish I might have conjured up.”

His lips tighten into a straight line. Could he be jealous? Is that even possible?

“He may look like he has the world at his feet, but he’s one careless step away from losing it all.”

Oh, shit. There it is. I was expecting some kind of messed-up plan, but that...that is actually insane.

“You want to take him down?” I ask in a harsh whisper. “Are you insane?”

Of course, Jai plays indifferent, as if I spoke to him in another language. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You implied—”

He shoots forward, slamming his large body into mine and clamping a hand over my mouth. His face is etched with red-hot fury and I fight against him, but a firm hand planted on my lower back keeps me from getting any distance.

“I’m not going to ask you to stay out of my business again. I didn’t save your life so you could fuck mine. All I’m asking is that you win your fight and return the money you owe. Then, you can lose your next fight and leave.”

I pull away from his hand and he allows it, but the firm grip he has on my lower back doesn’t resign. One word. There’s only one word I care about in that sentence.

“Leave?”

He nods once. “If you lose, and don’t die, you leave. Those are the rules.”

“Empty-handed?”

He nods again. “Broke and broken. Worse off than what you were when you came in.”

I gape at him, appalled. “How is that fair?”

“It’s not, but it’s a risk everyone down here has made.”

“And how does Skull make sure no one talks? I can’t imagine anyone giving a shit when they’ve got the entire world to hide in.”

Finally, Jai slips his hand from my lower back and runs it over his face, impatiently.

“With what? Last I checked, you couldn’t flee from country to country without money. Skull knows the details of every person down here, even you by now.”

I fold my arms. How efficient could this ‘Skull’ be on the outside world? Who in their right mind would engage in a conversation with him? Who would hire him?

“I doubt he knows every detail.”

“I’d be willing to bet thirty thousand dollars he knows your birth parents’ names. Skull has his fingers dipped in all kinds of illegal activity, not just underground fighting. He’s paid off cops, doctors, politicians—anyone and everyone who can help his cause. When I say he knows every detail, trust me, he does.”

Suddenly, this underground world has become even more dangerous, if that’s possible. Despite all that, my brain lingers on one possibility Jai put forward, and one only. My birth parents...is it possible? Can Skull help me find them? The thought quickly passes. The only thing I see Skull aiding me in is my death. He’ll cut my throat long before the request slips off my tongue.

“I don’t like that look on your face. Tell me what you’re thinking.”

I frown. “I’m not telling you anything. I don’t like being kept in the dark any more than you do. I’ll tell you what I’m thinking when you meet me on common ground.”

Jai’s face clouds over in thought. “How do I know I can trust you?”

“You don’t, but I’ve put all of my trust in you this far. The least you can do is return the favor.”

His eyes flicker between believing me and pondering the thought of telling me to go fuck myself. Thankfully, with a defeated sigh, he glances over his shoulder before training his serious, dark eyes on my face.

“I’m looking for my brother.”

“Your brother?”

He leans in close, so close I feel his breath blow along my jawline and tickle the lobe of my ear. It sends a tickle of delight across my skin and I relish in it. I don’t remember the last time someone was able to bring my skin to life.

“He was involved in this last year and I haven’t seen him since.”

My heart plummets into my shoes. If Jai’s brother participated in this last year and hasn’t resurfaced since...I hate to be the one to say it, but there’s just no way he’s alive. Still, I find it endearing that Jai is holding on to the hope that his brother is alive and well, but he’s going to get himself killed looking for answers, that much I know.

“I’m sorry to hear—”

“Joel isn’t dead. He’s too good a fighter to let something like that happen.”

I inch back a little, until my eyes lock with his. The sincerity in them, the frustration, the desperation, all pull at my heart strings. I’ve felt it too...the need to find a family member you know exists but isn’t there for you. The difference is, my parents are probably alive. There’s a good chance Joel isn’t, but, if this is Jai’s way of processing his grief, then I’ll entertain it.

“What do you think happened?”

Jai’ eyes crinkle around the edges as he cringes. This isn’t something he wants to explain to me. “You heard what Skull said about this setup being a part of an old brotherhood?”

I nod.

“It’s all bullshit—a backstory. What this is, is a job interview.”

He stops to let me take in the absurd information. I try to process it, but it doesn’t make any sense. “A job interview?”

Try as I might to keep the skeptical tone out of my voice, I fail.

“Skull wants only the best fighters to defend him and his illegal empire, and he can’t exactly put out an ad in the paper now can he?”

Okay, so it makes a little sense. I touch my hands to my forehead. This is some action movie-shit, something Denzel Washington or Tom Hardy should be starring in.

“So your plan is to?”

“Find my brother and destroy Skull.”

“That simple, huh?”

There’s no beating around the bush. Jai has a death wish and I need to get the hell out of here before it blows up and kills me too. Before I work on my own plan, though, there’s one little problem he seems to have overlooked.

“If what you’re saying is true and Skull is recruiting fighters for his little gang, your brother is the bad guy. If he was offered a job like you say he might have been, he took it.”

Jai tightens his jaw and glares at me with tormented eyes. Instantly, I see that this is something he’s thought about already. I also see he hasn’t come to terms with the fact his brother might kill him if Skull gives the orders.

“You think Skull gives anyone a choice? No. You work for him or you die. Simple.”

He rakes his teeth over his bottom lip and I wonder if he’s not entirely convinced by his words.

“Joel can be difficult...but he’s not a bad guy. When he sees that I’ve come for him, he’ll figure something out.”

I can’t say the best plan begins with depending on a possible ‘villain’ to save you, but it could be worse. I mean, at least he has some kind of plan, and isn’t tearing around here guns blazing.

“And if he doesn’t?”

Jai exhales and all of his features smooth out. “If he doesn’t, I’m as good as dead.”

The Second Mistake

After our discussion, Jai left. I didn’t ask him where he was going, but I noted the smaller roll of money he slipped into his pocket from his backpack. He has a plan down here, one that requires him to pay money for certain services. Perhaps he’s paying off one of Skull’s goons for information...it’s not a ridiculous assumption.

He didn’t come back until late afternoon and when he did, he didn’t make eye contact. Not once. I watched him as he laid on his bed and threw a rubber ball at the opposite wall. Every second throw got harder and harder, but he caught it every time. I dozed off while I watched, which led to dreams of him, dreams that ended with him being stabbed in the throat and me tossed over a railing. Eventually, it was enough to force me to open my eyes.

Which brings us to now.

My eyes adjust to the darkness immediately. Jai has put his shirt over the light again, letting only the faintest glow filter through. It’s quiet down this end of the tunnels, but in the distance I hear singing and loud conversation—like something you’d hear outside a bar. I watch him as he lies on his back with his arm slung over his face. He’s topless and I don’t blame him. The air is thick and sticky. There is no breeze, no fresh air, and to make it harder, I’m giving off a good portion of body heat myself.

While he’s unaware, I let my stare drag down the side of his torso. He looks so deliciously handsome lying there, and my insides flutter. He has a man’s body, that’s for sure. He has muscles and lines in places I haven’t seen on anyone else outside of fitness magazines. He’s built his body, sculpted it, and I wonder just how many women have touched it. How many women have had the pleasure of raking their fingers through his hair or brushing their lips across his stomach? I can’t help but wonder, as he lies still in his shorts, what he looks like below the belt. Surely a man his size packs a decent-sized penis...or maybe that explains the size of the rest of him. Maybe he had to compensate? I smirk. If I voice my opinions, would he show me? I shake my head. What the hell am I doing?

I force myself to clear my head and I close my eyes, hoping to pull my brain out of my vagina. I last a second until I reopen them and my mind falls back into dirtier waters. It’s kind of sexy of Jai to pay so much money to save my life. I’ve never had someone do something so selfless for me...and the way it makes me feel is immeasurable in words. Besides paying him back, how can I ever show him how much his companionship means to me? I’ve never had a real friend before, and I know Jai and I are far from friends, but it feels awesome. No wonder people surround themselves with people all the time. It’s nice to hear your own voice and know someone else is listening.

Something scuffles in the corner and I shift dramatically on the bed, pulling my knees up to my chest. I curl my toes, noticing immediately that Jai has taken my shoes and socks off.  How convenient.

“Jai?” I whisper, clasping my chest.

I hear another scuffle, then a distinct squeak. My heart stops cold. Fucking RATS!

“Jai,” I try again, this time my voice sounding panicked and distressed.

Still, he doesn’t move. And I thought I was a heavy sleeper. I lean over the space between our beds and touch him. Under my fingertips, the muscles in his chest tighten and before I know it, his arm closes around mine and I squeak as he tugs me off my bed and onto his.

“Jai—”

Somehow, he gets me in a headlock and pulls me until my body is on top of his and I’m unable to move. Pinned. His legs wrap around mine and squeeze until my knee feels like it’s going to pop out of place.

“Will you stop—”

Freeing me from his arms but not his legs, he tugs ear buds I didn’t see from his ears.

“Fucking hell, Kitten, don’t sneak up on me,” he orders, his chest vibrating against mine.

I try to shift my legs free, but he flexes his thick thigh muscles and I wince as my knee complains.

“I called your name twice, and, for the last time, stop with the Kitten. That’s not my name.”

“What are you doing?” he asks, ignoring my protest.

In the dull light, I notice the ghost of amusement on his lips and I feel the way his chest rises and falls a little quicker than it was a second ago. I wonder if it’s because I scared him or because my damp body pressed so tightly against his is affecting him.

“I think I heard rats.”

My fingers twitch against his smooth chest and the corner of his mouth does the same.

“Rats?”

I nod. “Big ones.”

I hear the muffled music he was listening to filter out through the ear buds. It sounds like rap music. I’ve rarely had the time to listen to music since taking up my nursing course. Down here, it’s nice to hear something other than cheers and the occasional drip of water. Jai notices me looking at the ear bud and picks it up.

“You want to listen?”

I nod, forgetting all about the rats and our strange position. He tucks a thick lock of my hair behind my ear before slipping the piece in.

I haven’t heard such a dramatic assemblage of lyrics before. It’s hypnotizing and real, and a million other things. Even the ‘F’ bomb that’s dropped so frequently sounds reasonable and beautiful. I don’t ask him who’s rapping or who wrote the piece, taking solace in the unknown.

Jai hunts for his music device tucked somewhere beside his body. When he finds it, the screen lights up as he scrolls for another song. I fight a pout, not wanting him to change it from the one I’m listening to.

“You can rest your head and lie here for a little while,” he says, lightly pushing my head down until my warm cheek rests against his chest. “You know, with the rats on your side of the room and all.”

I smile despite myself and snuggle against him. Soon after, the music skips from a deep rap to slow rock. The singer has a smooth baritone voice, one that both caresses and fucks my ear canal with its magic. It makes me think of my job and how I’ve probably lost it. It makes me think of my apartment and the eviction notice I’m going to see if I ever get out of here. Strangely, the song makes me not care. When it flows into the chorus, I think about my life so far...and about my parents. I haven’t been able to shake the possibility of Skull knowing their names. If I knew their names, I could track them down. I don’t want anything from them; I just want them to know that I’m alive and I’m okay—that I made it without them. Or maybe I want to spy a little, to see if they even stop for a second to spare a thought for me.

“Do you think Skull will give me the name of my parents if I ask?”

Underneath me, Jai’s entire body clenches. He doesn’t respond, at least not for a while anyway, and in the silence, I try to comprehend what that means. Yes? No?

“He’ll help you,” he admits eventually. “At a price.”

“A price?”

“With Skull, there’s always a price.”

I purse my lips together and nibble the inside of the bottom one. What’s Skull’s price? “I don’t have any money.”

Jai scoffs. “Skull has plenty of it. He won’t bat an eyelid at any price you offer him. He’ll want something else from you.”

I frown, trying to decipher his vagueness. What else could Skull possibly want from me? I have no skills, none that could benefit him anyway—oh. Oh! I lift my head to look Jai in the face.

“You think he’d want a sexual favor?” I ask, my eyebrows rising into my hairline.

He opens his eyes. “With you? Undoubtedly.”

What does that mean? Is it because I’m simply a female or because Jai thinks I’m pretty enough to draw Skull’s attention? If Skull is as big as Jai claims he is, women would flock to him, and not just normal women, beautiful women. Wealth and power always draw out the beautiful women.

Jai groans. “Please tell me you’re not contemplating fucking Skull for information?”

I flinch, taking offense. I’d never use sex to get what I want. Ever.

“Excuse me? I’d never do such a thing. Not that it’d be any of your business if I did, anyway. You may have saved my life and I might owe you a shitload of money, but that doesn’t mean you own me.”

With a mighty flick of his hips, Jai tosses me off of him. Somehow, before I fly off the cot, he manages to snag my waist and tuck me underneath the weight of his body. For a larger guy he moves swiftly, as if he weighs only a quarter of his weight. The ear bud pops from my ear and I grip his arms as his legs spread mine and his hips pin me to the mesh underneath us. His breath comes hot and fast. It clashes with mine, less than an inch from our lips. I’ve never dealt with anyone as demanding as Jai. One word is all it takes for him to switch from cool and calm to hot and annoyed. Strangely, it’s sexy. The grip he has on my wrists, the pressure he puts on my pelvis, and the sight of his half-naked body above mine whips my blood cells into a frenzy.

“I own you,” he says, his voice stoking the fire in my blood. “I owned you the second I had you pinned against the warehouse.”

I swallow hard, unable to stop my chest from rising and falling so rapidly. I shake my head. “No. We live in the twenty-first century. That’s not how it works.”

His intense gaze flicks to my lips, unleashing a torrent of butterflies into my stomach. “How does it work then? You tell me.”

His eyes flick back to mine. I don’t know how it works. I don’t think you can own somebody; not their choices anyway. You can own their heart, but everything else is off the table. I’m yet to meet anyone who I’d let own me in every sense of the word.

And boy, is it a powerful word.

Own is a word that equates to love. Owning somebody means you have the ability to tear them apart at your mercy, and the choice of putting them back together...or not. That doesn’t sound like something I’d give up easily, if at all.

“I don’t know,” I utter, finally. “But it doesn’t work that way.”

I hold my breath as he lowers his head, stopping only when his lips graze mine. I gasp as they first touch. It sends a bolt of lightning into me, awakening every nerve before frying them completely. His lips are dry, but incredibly soft. His breath smells of mint and fresh water, if that makes any sense. I’ve been to and seen the large tunnel, much like the one the cage hangs over, they use as a community toilet, but I didn’t see any basins there to brush your teeth.

“You wouldn’t jump through hoops for me?” he asks in a low, husky voice as he drops a little more pressure onto my pelvis.

I shake my head, but I so fucking would. Right now, I’d jump through anything for him if he promised to give me a long, hard treat afterwards. It feels good having him there, separated by only the fabric we wear. In deeper thought, how dirty and gritty would it be to have sex right here, knowing anyone walking by could see or hear? How magnificent would the memory be? I’m burning up just thinking about it.

“I could make you,” he says, moving a hand towards my collarbone.

I still as he tucks his index finger under the neckline of my tank top and traces it down to my cleavage. He smirks as he takes in my rapidly moving chest. It’s like he’s touching my lungs, forcing them to show him just how badly they want to inhale him, to be filled with him. He’s moving quickly, sliding into second base and he hasn’t even kissed me yet.

“I could show you just how easy it is to fall under someone’s thumb.”

“I don’t think you’re giving me enough credit. I can never be controlled by a man—”

He swallows the tiny distance between our mouths and the instant he takes my lips, rockets shoot off in my body. His kiss spins my organs into a tempestuous whirl. He doesn’t wait for permission to enter my mouth. Instead, he bites down on my lower lip and swallows my gasp as he forces his tongue inside. When our tongues touch, a rumble vibrates deep in his chest and quivers onto mine as he gathers me closer, forcing me to feel his erection between my legs. At the apex of my thighs, I clench in painful pulses. Even the zipper of my shorts becomes an arousing tool to get me off.

That’s what I want.

To get off.

I want to come, and I want Jai to be the one to do it. A rough hand is what I need. It’s what I crave and he reads my mind. The hand at my cleavage travels down the outline of my body and onto the button of my shorts. With a quick yank, they pop open. He continues to fuck my mouth with his, relentlessly, while he slips his fingers under the fabric of my underwear. He’s all I taste, all I think about. His being consumes me inch by inch, threatening to leave me broken if he doesn’t finish what he started.

“You want me here?” he asks into my mouth as he slides a finger down my outer lips, making me shudder and flex my hips into his hand.

I can feel my wetness coating his index finger with desperation. Fevered, I nod my head and whimper weakly as he spreads my lips with the tip of his index finger.

“I don’t think you want it that badly.”

This time, I nod a little more desperately. “I do. God. Fuck. I do.”

His eyes flare and I feel it throughout my entire body. Whatever I’m doing, it’s what he wants. I can see it. “Get your tits out, Kitten, and I’ll have you seeing stars.”

In record time, and with shaky hands, I yank up my tank top and tug down my cotton bra. It sits tightly underneath my tits, pushing them right up. I look at Jai. He’s fixated on them, his eyes thinned into lusty slits. He rakes his teeth over his bottom lip before thrusting his finger deep into me with a husky groan. My breath hitches and I grip the edges of the cot. Holy. Fuck me.

“You listen well like this,” he says and I hear the smile in his tone. “Maybe I should’ve done this from the beginning. Maybe then you wouldn’t have caused me so much trouble.”

Jai curls his finger and my entire body trembles as he strokes that one spot. The one that makes a girl lose her smarts.

“I like trouble.” I sigh. “It turns me on.”

And it does. People say stick with what you know, but I say stick with the unknown. Trouble lurks in the unknown and excitements breeds in the unknown. The unknown is what keeps me going.

My entire body clenches from the exhilarating sensation of his touch inside me. He pushes another finger in and I close my eyes to gain control as my body threatens to crumble under him. I slide my hands up his rock-hard torso and down his arms, storing every inch of him in my brain. I don’t want to forget a single detail. Not ever.

I push into his palm, forcing him deeper. My nipples ache, and I stretch to rub my breasts against his chest, but he has other ideas. As I arch my back, he dips his neck and catches a nipple between his teeth. I hiss, then moan as his tongue soothes the burn he created. I’m point five of a second away from breaking apart. He knows it too. Freeing my nipple from his sweet torture, he drags his mouth to my ear and I all but sigh as his cheek brushes mine.

“Do I own you, Emily?” he breathes in my ear.

In this moment, I’d agree to wear a collar with the name ‘KITTEN’ spelled out in fake diamond studs. It’s safe to say I’m putty in his hands.

“Yes.” I sigh, rocking my hips and forcing his fingers deeper inside me. “God, yes.”

“Told you,” he mumbles, but I pay no attention to it.

Convulsions rock me, and I catch the sound of his breath seizing in his throat as he pulls his head back enough to watch my face as I climax. I’m a mix of moans and shudders, each more violent than the last. He fingers me harder and faster, and with each speed I go off like a rocket for him, exploding into a thousand and one pieces.

Eventually, but not quietly, I come back down to earth. When I’ve caught my breath, Jai meets me, his face directly in front of mine and dead serious.

“If you go to Skull for help, you’re not going to get out. He’ll own you.”

I blink, confused. All of this...was to prove how easy it is to lose your head when you’re aroused? And I fucking failed.

He pulls my bra back up and tugs my shirt down. Then, Jai rolls us again until I’m on top of him. Brushing my hair away from my damp face, he locates my ear and slips an ear bud back inside. Slow rock plays once more.

Against my hip I feel him hard and wanting, but I’m too embarrassed to offer anything to help. I’ve just proven how easy it is to control someone...I’ve just proven how easy it would be for Skull to own me...I’ve just been finger banged underground by a stranger…

Shit.

Maybe sticking to the unknown isn’t my most stable piece of advice.

Drinks

I never fell asleep, but I faked it when morning rolled around and Jai woke up. Last night, he crashed out not long after he touched me, but I couldn’t. As my stomach twisted, both delightfully and painfully, I listened to one hundred songs that dragged me through one hundred different emotions. With an aggressive rap in one ear and his steady heartbeat in the other, I tried to rationalize my actions, but I kept coming back to one truth.

I am an idiot.

Once Jai left, an hour ago now, I moved back to my own cot. I have to talk to him about last night, that much I know. Though it didn’t mean anything on an emotional level, I have to clear the air. Most days, I’m not that kind of girl, and what happened was...was...not something I could’ve predicted. Ever. I don’t know how long I’m going to be down here, but I can’t sleep in a bed next to Jai and pretend what happened didn’t happen. If I bring it up, we can put it behind us and move on. That’s what responsible adults do, right?

Another ten minutes pass before I decide it’s less embarrassing to go out and find him than wallow in my own self-pity until he gets here. I swing my legs off the edge of my bed, cringing when my feet touch the concrete. I stand up and glance down at my clothes. My shirt is uneven and my bra is tucked uncomfortably at one corner. When I adjust them, I notice my shorts are wide open, exposing my black underwear. Sighing, I close the button and pull up the zipper. I feel dirty as I give myself another quick once-over. I wonder if anyone else can see what went on in here last night just by looking at me...I feel as though it’s written on my face. No one’s cheeks feel this warm unless they’ve done something dirty. As the thought passes, a tall woman with long, blonde hair walks by, and she raises her perfectly tweezed eyebrows at me. I frown, but there’s no mistaking it. She knows. These tunnels echo so clearly and if she sleeps in the same tunnel as us, there’s no avoiding it.

I slip into my black shoes, forgoing the socks, and step out into the main tunnel. As I walk past various nooks, crannies and service walkways, I see most people are still sleeping. I don’t blame them. There isn’t much else you can do down here. Somewhere in the distance, I hear a woman crying and a man yelling, calling her selfish. Poor girl. I’d hate to have my business aired so freely.

I don’t know exactly how long I walk around for. I mostly stick to the areas I know, too scared to venture off into a tunnel I haven’t walked through yet. I get lost easily. I always have. When my feet begin to ache against the thin, rubber soles of my shoes, I decide to head back to our space and wait for Jai there. I almost make it unbothered too, but I’m stopped just as I pass the cage. I drag my eyes from the floor and onto an old pair of sandals. Thick, hairy toes poke out the ends and wiggle as I watch. Grimacing, I force my stare up bare calves and onto tattered shorts before quickly pushing the rest of my attention up a slightly hairy chest and onto an angry face with the most disturbing spider tattoo right on the corner of his mouth. I groan. Not this fucking guy again. He’s not an attractive man, by any means, and the scowl on his face doesn’t help his appeal at all.

“Can I help you?” I ask, attitude thick in my voice.

I don’t have Jai with me so I need to play this smart, but I can tell by the man’s demeanor he has an issue with me and he needs to know I won’t tolerate it.

He slides closer, his scowl morphing into a twisted grin. “It was you, wasn’t it? The girl I heard last night.”

Just like that, fire ignites in my face and I know, in the glow of the spotlights, he can see it. Shaking my head, I stammer, unable to formulate a proper sentence. Giving up, I seek to push past him, but he blocks my path.

“I like your voice,” he purrs, reaching out to touch my lips.

I swat him away, the red in my cheeks becoming a result of anger, not embarrassment. “You’ve got the wrong girl.”

He shoots forward and grabs a fistful of my hair. The pain of it sears across my scalp and I wince. Gasping, I close my hand around his in an attempt to pry his fingers away, but he only tightens his grip. He smirks at the sounds I make.

“Oh, I have the right girl.”

I cringe and squeeze my eyes shut as he licks the side of my face with his gross, slimy tongue. My gag reflex starts twitching, my throat cramping as the wetness soaks into my pores. I’m going to throw up.

“Really, Kitten? You couldn’t have stayed out of trouble for an hour?”

My eyes shoot open at the sound of a familiar voice. My attacker releases my hair and I stumble backwards until my hand finds a weak railing. As I lift my shirt to wipe my face, I see Jai drive a powerful fist into my attacker’s mouth. If this were a cartoon, the spider would have been forced from his skin. I shuffle back as the sleazy guy crumbles to the floor, grasping at his mouth and moaning loudly. Jai steps over him and towards me. I cower at the size of him and the aggression in his steps. He flexes his hand at his side, balling it up before relaxing it once more.

“What are you doing?” he demands, his jaw clenching.

I rub at my face with my shirt. “I was looking for you.”

“You shouldn’t walk around here without me. You could get hurt.”

I lower my shirt and scowl at him. I see plenty of women walk around here—some not even wearing clothes. If I want to walk around, I should have that right. I don’t need to be babysat by Jai. I’m a grown-ass woman.

“You might call me Kitten, but I am not one. I can take care of myself.”

He flicks his eyebrows, his mouth morphing into a smile of complete mockery. I hate it. I hate being treated like a child.

“Okay, Miss Lioness, tell me, how were you going to handle that situation?”

I cross my arms over my chest. “If you gave me a little more time, I would have done something.”

He shakes his head. “When you’re in a situation like that, you don’t have time. The trick is avoiding the situation before it even has a chance to happen. He had you by your hair. You were as good as his if I hadn’t shown up when I did.”

As good as his? Is he implying that I wouldn’t have been able to fight him off? I may be a smaller woman, but I am fucking fierce. I’d die long before I let anyone do something I didn’t want done to my body.

“You asshole!” the man growls, pulling himself to his feet.

Jai and I watch him as blood trickles from his mouth and down his chin.

“You’re going to fucking regret th—”

I shoot forward and cock my knee. While his attention is on Jai, I drive my foot forward with full force and I connect perfectly. Right in the baby-maker. He yells in my face and grips my shoulder. His breath smells horrid, like copper and rust, and his knees click together. I shrug out from underneath him and he drops to the floor. I don’t know if that kick is going to come back to haunt me, but for now, it felt nice to do. My heart-rate has elevated to dangerous levels, threatening to burst through my chest and I peer sideways at Jai, who smiles down at me. It’s reassuring.

I smirk back at him. “Say it.”

He angles his head. “Say what?”

“You’re impressed. Admit it.”

Jai smiles, a full-blown smile, one I haven’t seen before. It lights up his features and exposes his perfect white teeth. “How about I buy you a drink instead?”

I raise my eyebrows, interested. “And when and where am I going to collect it?”

He flicks his head towards the tunnel behind him, in the opposite direction of our nook. I haven’t ventured any further into the tunnels down here, but if there’s a place to ‘buy’ drinks, I’m sold.

We pass lots of fighters on the way. Some drunk. Some sober. All scary. For the most part, I keep my head down and stick close to Jai. About a mile down one tunnel, we pop out at yet another large opening. Whoever designed this underground system was clever. Every mile or so there are large open tunnels in the floor, allowing any excess water the previous tunnel didn’t catch to filter down. Being as close to the river as this industrial site is, I’m assuming they’ve also taken into account any flooding from there, thus ensuring the spillage from the river doesn’t flood the lower areas.

What amazes me most about this particular space are the naked people. Men. Women. Everyone. As naked as the day they were born. I notice the smell in here is different to the other tunnels. Various fruity aromas of pomegranate, peach, pineapple and apple, as well as manlier, earthier ones, flood into my nostrils. My attention rests on the steady stream of clean water that seeps from a small pipe above. It spits out the water, allowing at least twelve people below to wet their cloths and clean their bodies. Granted, it’s not the kind of shower that can efficiently wash away all of the day’s grime or relieve a back ache, but at least it’s something.

“This is the wash area.”

I grip his arm and squeeze. “Wait. A wash area? There’s a wash area?”

I watch people brush their teeth and rinse out clothes. All this time? All this time there has been a wash area and he never told me?

Jai nods and I glare up at him.

“I found it last night.”

That explains why he felt so nice to touch and his breath smelled of mint. Fresh, delightful mint. “And you didn’t tell me?”

He smirks. “I was distracted by other things.”

I look away from him as his eyes search my face for a reaction. I thought it’d be easy to address last night with him and play it off as nothing, but the thought alone is enough to make my blood simmer deliciously. God. Why does he have to have such a nice face? Boys are much easier to talk to when you don’t want to lick them from head to...well, head. I like those boys. They make me feel normal, not tingly.

“Now you know it’s here, let’s go to the bar and get a drink. You can wash later.”

I shake my head. Screw washing later. I need to be clean now. I need it more than I need air, more than I need anything. A gross grease covers the surface of my skin, my hair is oily and I’ve worn the same panties two, or is it three, days in a row. I will kill anyone who gets in my way.

“Where’s the bar?” I ask, deciding to skip pointing out the unrealistic notion of there being a bar down here.

He outstretches his arm, the ropes of muscle lengthening with it, at the tunnel directly in front of us. Out of all the nooks and crannies Jai chose, he had to choose the one down the end with the toilet. Just my luck. I’d be much happier down here.

“You go, I’ll meet you there.”

He gives me a once-over before he exhales. He knows it’s a lost cause, so he leaves. When he’s gone, excitement bubbles inside me like nothing else. I’m smiling widely, stupidly, as I inch towards the falling water. I pause a few feet out from a woman washing her long, auburn hair. At her feet sit all of her products, from body wash to shampoo, and it smells divine.

Her body is in perfect shape. When I say perfect, I’m talking slim hips, flat stomach, big natural boobs and long legs. Yeah, there’s no way I’m getting naked in front of her.

I slip my hands under the water and let the warm liquid run over the skin on my hands. It feels ...indescribable. I close my eyes and let a lazy smile curve my lips only to open them again a second later when the woman next to me toys with a loud plastic. I try not to stare as she bends over to free a baby wipe from its packet, but I fail. To my surprise, when she straightens her posture, she extends the clean wipe to me.

“Forget your stuff, did you?” She assumes in a thick, Russian accent.

I start to shake my head and explain my situation, but then I change my mind. “Yes, wow, thank you.”

The woman beams at me, and sadly, her smile doesn’t match the rest of her physique. Missing teeth isn’t a feature I was expecting on someone so perfect in every other way. I run the cloth under the water, then press it to my face. I hold it there, allowing my pores to soak up as much moisture as they can before I scrub them clean.

“You’re not getting undressed?” she asks, lathering her chest with soap.

“No. Not in front of all these people.” I glance around.

Men and women line the walls, watching and enjoying the crowd of naked people. The last thing I want is attention of the wrong kind. I want to avoid another situation like the one I just had with Spiderface.

“Your man doesn’t stay to protect you? If he stayed you could get naked.”

My man? Oh, she means Jai. I snort. “No. He’s waiting at the bar.”

The woman points across the room to a tall, broad-shouldered bald man. “You see him? He is my guy.”

Her guy watches her, his stare not once leaving her body. I don’t blame him. I find it hard to keep my eyes away too. She’s flawless. I run the wipe down the back of my neck.

“How long have you two been together?”

“A day and a half.”

I pause, confused. Did I hear her correctly? Did she say a day and a half? “You met here?”

She nods. “It took me a long time to realize it, but it’s best move to find lover and protector down here.”

I frown. “Why?”

Her bright, green eyes brighten with laughter and she swats at me.

“For safety and to secure position. It’s not safe for women down here. We must survive.”

She retrieves her bottle of shampoo and holds it out. I don’t hesitate holding out my hand, and she squeezes a generous amount inside my palm. With a warm smile, she gathers the rest of her stuff and trots across the room to her ‘lover’. He swats her on the ass the second she gets within arm’s reach and I frown. Ew. Imagine being touched so intimately by someone you barely know. I catch on to my train of thought just as it finishes. I can’t talk. I’ve known Jai a few days and he’s already touched my most intimate place.

I tip my head back and let the water dampen my hair, then, I run the shampoo through the strands and let it soak for a few minutes. While that’s doing its thing, I gather rogue shampoo bubbles from the top of my hair onto my wipe and scrub the rest of my body with it. When I close my eyes, I imagine I’m alone and in my apartment, enjoying a nice warm shower.

After I wash out my hair, I make an attempt to get my panties off without taking off my shorts. Somehow, I manage it. I even manage to borrow a squirt of body wash from the girl to my left to clean them with. I don’t know what’s more disturbing, the fact I’m cleaning my underwear with body wash or that I’m excited I get to wear the unappealing cotton fabric again in a few hours’ time. Who knew it’d take getting trapped underground with no toiletries for me to love my cotton underwear.

I contemplate stuffing my panties into the pocket of my shorts, but decide against it. Instead, I head back in the direction of our little space so I can lay them out on my bed. I want them aired out and I want to change my clothes while I’m at it too. Now my skin is clean, the fabric that grazes it feels...soiled. I’ll change into something else, then meet Jai in the bar for a drink.

I cross my fingers hoping the drinks are alcoholic because booze is the only thing that will help me keep a straight face when I sit before Jai, panty-less and clean.

Words

Warm air blows around my exposed calves. Oh God, it feels good to be clean. Is there a feeling better than cool, damp hair on your warm back when you’re struggling to breathe through the hot air?

I brush my fingertips along my bare stomach. I’ve never dressed like this before. I’ve never shown my belly button or exposed my hips. Still, I keep my head high and walk with confidence as I make my way back into the washroom. More people are showering now than they were before. They look happy, completely relaxed, and it makes me want to take off my clothes and do it all over again. I watch the quick succession of droplets that fall from the pipe. It’s amazing how such little allowance feels like a torrential downpour when you need it most. I, for one, will never complain about the pressure of my shower at home ever again.

I keep walking and head into the tunnel Jai pointed out earlier. A mile down, I pop out the end and right into a bar area. Of course, it doesn’t actually look anything like a bar, but I get the point. It’s a place you come to buy drinks. I scan the large area, looking over people that crowd around crates and shake their tin cups as they tell epic stories. There is no music, only the sound of cheerful conversation. My favorite kind.

On the other side of the room, I see a hand go up and it leads me directly to Jai. On the crate he leans on, two tin cups sit, filled with synthetic confidence in liquid form. I peer into them as I approach.

“Whiskey,” he announces, nudging my cup as his eyes flit to my bare stomach.

His analyzing gaze makes me feel self-conscious as well as overheated. A few seconds in and his presence is already forcing my pulse to hit overdrive and my skin to prickle all over. I expected to feel less heat between my legs now I’ve experienced a small piece of Jai, but if anything, it’s multiplied tenfold. I want to lick his chest and kiss his lips. I want to feel his rough hands all over my body and between my legs once more. Trying my best not to squeeze my thighs together, I lower myself onto the little stool across from him, thankful the crate hides the majority of my naked stomach.

“I thought the black halter wasn’t your style?”

“It’s not,” I say, reaching for my cup. “But it’s the only thing that matches these leggings.”

Jai draws his cup to his lips. “They’re nice leggings.”

I have to agree. Not only do they fit and are comfortable, they also had the price tag still attached. Whoever owned these before paid a pretty penny for them. If I lost them, I’d be pissed. I sip at the whiskey and wince as it burns its way down my throat. I cough and cover my mouth.

“It tastes like gasoline.”

Crinkles surface around his eyes as he smiles while swallowing a mouthful of his own whiskey. “Just as expensive, too.”

I raise my eyebrows. “An interesting statement from someone who catches the train.”

“I have a car, but I enjoy catching the train. I like the grittiness of it all.”

I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who enjoys catching the train. I hate it with a passion—the smells, the people, the stops—ugh.

“When you’re not riding the subway and smashing innocent women’s tablets, what do you drive?”

His eyes flare and I can tell I’ve stumbled on a topic he’s passionate about. “A Ford Mustang, Shelby, GT500.”

I stare at him. All I heard were words. Words I don’t understand the meaning of. When I ask someone what they drive, I expect a color or a one-name brand. ‘A blue one’ is a good answer or ‘a Nissan’ works too. I can understand those. When more than one name comes out of their mouth, followed by a bunch of numbers, I’m lost. Jai catches on, too.

“A red one with black stripes up the middle.”

I smile. “Fast?”

A stupid question. It’s red; of course it goes fast. Jai tips his head to the side a little. It’s endearing—cute, even.

“She does all right. What’s with the questions?”

I shrug. “We sleep in the same room. It makes sense we should get to know each other a little more.”

Jai leans forward, resting his elbows on the table. I drop my stare from his and watch as he trails his index finger along the rim of his tin cup. At any moment I expect blood to roll down the dull metal, but he keeps his touch light and careful.

“You really think knowing me a little more will make you feel any better about what you let me do last night?”

His tone confuses me. It’s half amused, half serious. I wondered who was going to address last night’s situation first. I would have done it in a roundabout way, but I guess Jai’s style is more...straight to the point.

“This has nothing to do with last night. I don’t need to make myself feel better. I own my actions.” I frown. “Wait. Are you implying I should think less of myself because of what happened?”

“Not at all.”

I grip my tin cup in my hand. “Then what are you saying?”

Jai’s full lips fight a smile. It seems almost everything I say is amusing to him. He’s not taking this conversation as seriously as I am, and it bugs me.

“What I’m saying is, what’s done is done. Even if I tell you my whole life story, we’ll always share that moment as strangers.”

His stare flickers over my burning cheeks and watering eyes. I don’t think I’ve been in a more embarrassing conversation. This is the first time I’ve ever had a conversation with a guy that has given me an orgasm, after the fact.

I cover my face with my hands. “This is humiliating.”

Jai laughs once. “Don’t be embarrassed. You were perfect.”

Perfect? I peer through my fingers. There’s no humor to his look. Whatever is happening in the depths of his ocean-like eyes makes me feel sixteen all over again.

Virginal.

Curious.

Shameless.

It’s an art, saying the right words to make a girl feel like a puddle of jelly, an art I suspect Jai has mastered.

Dropping my hands from my face, I sigh. “Can we talk about something else?”

He studies me while I rake my teeth over my bottom lip. “We could, but I think I prefer making you blush.”

I roll my eyes. Of course he does. “Please? I find this topic of conversation uncomfortable—even in normal circumstances.”

He exhales and slumps into his chair. “Fine. We can change the topic, but I’m revisiting it once you’ve had a few drinks. I want to know where your panties have disappeared to.”

It takes me a few long seconds to process what he’s said. When I do, my cheeks burn unlike anything I’ve experienced before. How can he tell? He’s looking at me, his eyes dancing while his mouth taunts me with a lopsided smirk.

“I’m wearing them,” I tell him, but the certainty I hoped for doesn’t reach my voice.

He leans closer and I focus on his lip as he drags his tongue along the bottom one. To tease me or moisten it, I have no idea.

“I know you’re not.” His voice is unbearably intimate and I squeeze my thighs together. “And it’s making it really hard for me to stay on this side of the table.”

I swallow hard, my attention flicking to his lips. “This isn’t the place.”

My attempt at protesting is lame. My drama teacher always said that if you can’t convince yourself, you’re not going to convince anybody, and it’s true. Jai doesn’t look the sold, not in the slightest.

His irises dance with indecent excitement as he taps the side of his cup. “There’s never a good place, Kitten, but you’re right. After last night. I’ve decided I don’t like the idea of someone else hearing your husky voice as I make you come.”

I inhale and hold until my lungs burn. How does he say those things? How do they just tumble from his mouth and make my pussy swell? I pull my cup to my mouth and take one large mouthful, then another. I swallow it and grit my teeth before pushing my cup across the crate. He gets the hint and with a sexy half-smile, he grabs the cup, pushes out of his seat and saunters across the room.

Fucking hell.

I bunch my hair up in one hand to expose my neck while I fan my face with the other. How am I going to make it through the rest of the day without having Jai take me against a tunnel wall? Using only his words, he has all of my nerves heightened. If we were elsewhere, and alone, I’d have made him tear my leggings with his teeth already. I can tell he wants to.

I want it too.

More than anything.

***

When Jai returns with full cups, conversation lightens up. I’m grateful. My nipples were beginning to sting they were rubbing that hard against the fabric of my halter.

“I really am sorry for breaking your tablet,” he admits after I tell him about my studies and how long I’ve been doing them for.

His eyes are no longer wide and alert. The whiskey has slackened them, turning them into tired slits. My eyes feel the same—tired and heavy with impure thoughts. I stopped at three cups, deciding here wasn’t the place I should completely lose my mind.

“Thank you. Although, if you had come clean in the first place, I wouldn’t be in this mess.”

Jai shuffles his small crate chair closer to me and when he rests his arms on the makeshift table, his arm brushes against mine. Hyperawareness of his warm skin sizzles through me.

“If you can tell me with absolute honesty that you actually enjoyed your life before you came here, I’ll apologize for that too.”

My brows furrow. I certainly didn’t hate my previous life, but it did lack the excitement every other twenty-five-year-old was having. I haven’t really thought about it. In a way, I’m kind of unbothered by the thought of losing my place in my studies and not completing the course. I don’t own much and I’m late to pay rent on my apartment, also. My landlord told me she wouldn’t wait for me again, so it’s safe to say I’m officially homeless. And...I don’t care.

“I don’t want this to be my life, if that’s what you mean.”

He shakes his head. “That’s not what I’m saying at all.”

“Then what are you saying?”

He inches closer, his face unbearably close to mine. “I see the way you react to the fights. I feel your body tighten and relax. Your pupils dilate. Your breath becomes heavy. You hate being down here, but you love the darkness of it all—the dirtiness.”

I swallow the pool of moisture in my mouth. Every word he says is true. I need this. I needed to be pulled from my old life and forced into a new one. I don’t ever want to go back. I can’t do plain now I’ve experienced the flavors of another life. My heart is set on Italy. If I don’t get Italy, I’ll die.

“You’re observant,” I say, involuntarily tilting my face towards his.

Jai’s eyes darken, filling with desire. “It’s important. It drives me crazy, you know.”

“What does?”

“Standing so close to you when you’re watching a fight and knowing your thoughts and your attention isn’t on me.”

My lips part as I expel a heady breath of air. There’s something animalistic about this man. There’s something he has that I want to be a part of, but as turned on as I am, I refuse to slip under his thumb so easily. “You’re fishing for something. I’m not as naïve as you think, Mr. Stone.”

His lips pull on one side. “I don’t need to trick you, Emily. You’re a big girl. You know what you want.”

Why? Why is he trying to get under my skin all of a sudden? Why is he talking to me as if he wants my legs around him more than anything else in the world? Fucking wasn’t a priority yesterday.

“And what do I want?”

“Me,” he states, simply. “And I want you.”

My throat dries. Word by word, he’s killing me, winding me tighter than ever before. I’m about to implode. Every sense is heightened. Even the rogue drop of sweat rolling between my breasts feels erotic as it teases my pores.

“What’s changed?” I ask, curiously. “You’re so certain this is what you want. What’s made you so adamant?”

“Something happened.”

Hooked, I raise my brows. “What happened?”

“You. You came so tightly and so perfectly around my fingers, agreeing to everything I said. Your hot breath blew across my face again and again as your body rocked beneath mine.”

He pauses to glance at my chest as it quickens in pace. Satisfied, his irises come back to mine, and a flash of something beautiful and raw sparks in them. It rushes through my body like lightning, relentlessly striking every nerve.

“My cock is jealous. It wants to accomplish the same feat.”

Holy.

Fuck.

Shameless

With a gasp I stumble forward but catch myself against the wall, my hands shoulder width apart. Jai’s body covers mine, pushing me harder against the dirty tunnel wall, his hard cock pressing fiercely into my ass cheek. I don’t know what happened between our conversation in the bar and our tiny nook, but somewhere between there and here, we decided we were going to fuck.

Hard.

His hand skims the arch of my back and the feel of his rough, calloused flesh sends my body into overdrive. As it slips onto the curve of my ass, my exposed skin tingles where he touched it. I expect my body to calm with every breath I take, but I only work myself up more.

With his free hand, he brushes my hair to the side and presses his hard body against my spine. I shiver as his breath blows across my ear in heavy, excited pants. As one hand grips my ass, the other brushes away hair at the nape of my neck, only to replace it with warm, wet lips. I sigh as his lips part and he grazes my skin with his teeth.

“I’m not going to lie,” he speaks, letting an arm slide around my waist. “I’ve thought about this since the first night.”

“You have?”

His hand presses firmly against my taut tummy, urging my ass on to him. Jai groans his yes, sending rough, glorious tingles down my spine. “From the second I pushed you up against the warehouse and saw your fuckable lips.”

I simper. “Refresh my memory? Was that before or after you insinuated I was a crack-whore?”

He pushes forward and snags my earlobe between his teeth. I hiss and push back on him, making him grind harder into my ass. I love the way his body covers mine, like a warm blanket of sex and alpha male. It creates a surge of electricity inside me and I can’t stop it. I need him. I need him like I need air.

Pushing against him, I turn around and pause when we stand torso to torso. His abs clench against my stomach, and his eyes hold mine in a grip so crushing, I’m certain I’m going to drown if he doesn’t let me come up for air. Throwing me a safety net, Jai’s lips crash to mine and I moan as he plunges his tongue into my mouth. He’s so male.

Dominant.

Assertive.

Certain.

I’m burning up and drenching my leggings with desperation and need. Teasing me with his tongue, Jai slips a hand between our bodies and presses a long, hard finger against my sensitive spot. I inhale against his mouth and feel the muscles around his lips try to smile, but he fights it. His firm fingertip circles me with a soft, almost absent pressure, but tingles grow with his touch regardless. Then, I feel his fingers curl around the band to my tights and push. I move my hips, helping him get the fabric down over my ass. When the fabric touches my knees, his mouth releases me and he grips my shoulders. I barely have time to lick my lips and savor his taste before he turns me around and pulls my ass towards him. I grip the wall as best I can, digging my fingertips into the eroded concrete as he undoes his belt. The sound is all the foreplay I need. Even the rustle of a foil packet being torn is enough to keep me heated.

In the next heartbeat, I feel him pressed into my back and the length of him settles between the cheeks of my ass. My breath hitches and his cock spasms. It turns him on. His hands come around my waist and onto my breasts. With a grip much too tight but all too arousing, he squeezes me in his hands, flicking my nipples between his fingers. I haven’t known Jai for long, but there’s no denying he’s a force of nature.

Caught up concentrating on my breathing, I don’t realize Jai has moved his hips until he places the tip of his long, thick cock in the gap of my thighs, directly beneath my entrance. The warmth of his flesh makes me gasp loudly. Smiling against the shell of my ear, he rocks his hips and I feel the fabric of his pants against the back of my legs. He’s kept his clothes on. To passers-by, he looks fully clothed.

Gripping himself and moving his hips, he works the head of his cock across my folds, pushing into my opening only to transfer my arousal onto him.

I whimper, with arousal or agony, I don’t know. All I know is I want him.

Bad.

So. Fucking. Bad.

“You have to keep it down if you don’t want others to hear you,” he whispers into my ear and I bite my lower lip.

If he didn’t feel so good, staying quiet wouldn’t be a problem. But he does feel good. Oh, he feels fucking amazing, and he hasn’t even entered me yet.

“Fuck them,” I pant, resting my forehead against the concrete wall.

We could be in the cage, in front of everybody, and I still don’t think I’d give a shit as long as Jai kept touching me.

“Not them,” he murmurs into my ear. “Only you.”

With a rough pull on my hip, Jai enters me and a rush of air is forced from my lungs. I barely have time to register the feeling of him entering my body it happens so quickly. The first jolt of pleasure as he stretches me, seizes my spine and my entire body stiffens at the feeling. He chuckles darkly in the back of his throat as he slowly drags himself back out again. Then he pumps into me, stroking me deeply, and I moan low in my throat. Warmth from his chest exudes onto my back as he presses harder against me. I close my eyes and groan feebly as his teeth graze my ear, making a bolt of excitement shoot through me.

“You feel too good. Too tight. Too wet,” he groans, his voice husky and heavy. “I can’t take it. No more playing, Kitten”

Without warning he moves faster, harder, fucking me for real and I just about lose it. Electricity frissons down my spine and mixes with my arousal, creating a dangerous chemical reaction of desperation and need. Jai’s movements speed to a frantic pace and he grunts and growls low in his chest, pushing me towards release as he continues to fuck me. He grips my ass, squeezing with all his might as he continues to thrust in long, quick strokes. Pleasure zips through my body and dances along my spine. I’m quickly falling away from reality. Nothing else matters in this moment; nothing except my desires.

Letting go of my ass, Jai trails a trembling hand over my hip and down between my legs. His breath hitches against my earlobe when my wetness coats his finger as he drags it over my clit, making me shudder. He pulses inside me once, twice, before exhaling in defeat. He’s going to come. He doesn’t have the strength to hold on. I won’t let him. Another shudder shakes my body as his thumb strokes me. I reach between us, pushing his hand away.

“You don’t need help making me come,” I pant, swallowing hard. “Fuck me harder.”

I don’t want the sensation of his calloused thumb to distract me from the feel of his hardness. I desire that more. I desire to be fucked, not rubbed. I don’t need it.

He yanks me back and flicks his hips, forcing his cock deeper. A sharp jolt of pleasure seizes my spine and my entire body stiffens at the feeling once more.

“Too much?” he asks, and I hear the amusement in his tone.

“Not for me.”

He chuckles darkly in the back of his throat as he slowly drags himself back out, leaving only the tip inside me. A shiver makes my thighs tremble as I squeeze the tip of him as tightly as I can. I smirk when he gasps under his breath. Jai grips my jaw and pulls my face to the side, as far as it can possibly go. Then, his lips crash to mine, and he forces my mouth open with his tongue. His kiss sends my head whirling, sucking all rational thought from my brain and the air from my lungs. The thought of him taking everything from me and coming into the latex sleeve that separates our bodies has me leaking everywhere. He trusts again, harder, and I feel him deep inside me, painfully deep. My mouth parts against his to let out a sharp hiss, but he doesn’t care. His mouth devours my hiss and he thrusts again, drawing another from me.

“Yes,” I gasp, arching my back. “Give me more.”

Over and over I beg him until I explode, the spasms in my pussy tightening rhythmically around his cock. That’s all it takes for Jai to find his own release. He groans into my mouth, squeezing my jaw until it hurts. The movement of his hips becomes uneven, powerful still, but uneven. He holds me in place, his tongue caressing my lips for a small eternity afterwards. His body is heavy, but I don’t mind it pressing so protectively against me for the time being.

When the euphoria wears off, that’s when the feeling of humiliation kicks in. It was nice being shameless in public for a little while, but now I’m back to reality with dirt on my face and a semi-erect cock still inside me. It’s not my proudest moment, but at least I feel a lot more relaxed.

Taking his mouth from mine, Jai brushes my hair away from my neck and replaces it with his lips. Heat stokes itself in my stomach as his cock pulses softly inside of me.

“I want you again, Kitten,” he murmurs, his voice holding the alluring tone it did when we were in the bar area. “You fit me so well. I need it again.”

My eyes thin, my lids growing heavy with lust once again. “When?”

Gripping my waist, he slips out of me and turns me around so my back is flush against the wall. Seeing his face so close to mine takes my breath away. To think someone like him, someone so perfect, would want me does crazy things to my body.

“Now. Later on. Tomorrow,” he groans and leans in, bringing his mouth to mine. “I wish we weren’t here. Your pussy feels so good, I want to taste it too.”

My sex clenches, completely sold on his words. I let my stare fall to his lips...what I wouldn’t give to feel them against my core. “That’s all you want?”

His blue eyes flare and he shakes his head. “I want to rub my cock on your lips, feel it deep in your throat.”

Oh. Sweet. Fuck. Me. Saliva pools under my tongue and I swallow it.

“Every hole you have, I want to claim.” He surges forward and catches my bottom lip between his teeth, smirking when I wince and my knees wobble.

I sigh as the back of his hand caresses my abdomen before slipping between my legs. I inhale sharply and fall against the concrete wall as a jolt of pleasure engulfs me. All I see is Jai’s smile and his heavy lids. It’s a look that promises me ecstasy.

A look that promises me escape.

It’s a look I never thought I’d see on a man like him.

And it’s all for me.

The Pardon

I groan. My head hurts, and not in the same way my vagina does. While a pleasant ache pulses between my thighs, a not-so-pleasant ache throbs over every inch of my skull.

I didn’t drink to get drunk in the bar, but it seems I drank just enough to acquire a hangover.

Oh, joy.

Normally, when I drink enough for a hangover to hit, I walk it off in the fresh air. Here, there is no fresh air. I groan again and force my head up. I blink a few times and wait for my eyes to adjust to the darkness. It’s not quiet in the tunnels. Cheering, roaring and rattling chains echo all around me. It seems more round one fights are occurring just down the tunnel. If my brain had a voice box, it’d scream right about now. Instead, it pulses agonizingly in my skull.

When my sight comes around, I glance down at the body underneath me. I can just make out his face as he watches me back, blinking tiredly. I slept on Jai. Again. I shift a little, but pause when I notice every single inch of our bodies are naked. The only thing that covers us is a large, blue cotton shirt and even then, a big portion of our legs are still exposed. He feels amazing underneath me, his skin as smooth as silk, and muscles firm and safe.

My fingers twitch against his bare chest as silence quickly begins to thicken the air between us. I wonder what he’s thinking. Was it okay for him? Does he want me to go? Does he want to go? Am I too heavy? Question after question filters into my mind and I’m powerless to stop them. This is the curse every woman has to deal with—endless questions that don’t need to be asked. When they’re asked, a shit storm ensues because we’re always given the answer we don’t want. Still, we ask them, don’t we? If we don’t ask, we become paranoid, then depressed, until finally, we morph into all kinds of bat-shit crazy.

I laugh nervously. “This is when the regret settles in, right?”

I don’t want his answer. I don’t want to hear him say he regrets it, because I don’t. Liberation mixes with my shame and it’s confusing me. In a way, I’ve never felt as free in my life as I did when we fucked. It was real, raw and unadulterated. It was my initiation into this new life—however short.

His fingers play along each side of my ribs, but it doesn’t make me any less nervous. The strongest backhands always come from those who caress the softest.

“Do you regret what we did?” he asks, his face betraying no emotion.

“No,” I reply with absolute certainty.

“Good.” He grips my waist and pulls me higher so my lips are in line with his. “Because I want more.”

My breath hitches as the rigidness of his eager cock presses against my inner thigh. Sweet mother of God, I’ve hit the jackpot. I wonder if you can fuck away a hangover. I’ve never tried, but I’m willing to test it out. Opening my legs so I straddle his hips, I lower my mouth to his. He parts his lips, anticipating my kiss. I don’t give it to him. Instead, I drag my tongue along his bottom lip, making something sexy rumble in his chest and vibrate against my nipples. I don’t know what we’re doing or how long it’ll last, but for now, it’s a nice escape. I can almost forget my surroundings with him here to distract me. I slide my fingers up his chest and into his black, spikey hair. I’ve wanted to touch his hair for a while. There’s something sexy about the way it sits all uncaring and unplanned. As I plant my lips on the corner of his mouth, the sound of someone clearing their throat freezes me in my spot, Jai too. I don’t dare look to the entrance. Instead, I let Jai do the honors. When he does, the muscles in his body tighten to maximum point, making my stomach churn.

“Stone. Three days and you’re up,” the man says before he tosses something heavy onto the ground.

Jai pulls the cotton shirt tighter around me, so it wraps and covers most of my privates. With a flick of his hips, I’m on my back with a great portion of flesh showing to the man lingering by the opening. I shuffle on the cot to cover as much as I can while Jai slips into a pair of sweatpants, uncaring that someone else is watching. Embarrassment prickles over the surface of my skin, but it quickly becomes unnoticeable as Jai picks up a heavy, tattered, black punching bag.

It’s time for Jai’s round one.

If he loses, I’m in here by myself.

Suddenly, I understand why that Russian woman in the shower found someone to protect her. It’s dangerous down here. Who’s going to protect me once Jai is gone?

I look to Jai and see his eyes narrow in on the stranger. He watches me, hungrily, his creepy, black stare drinking in each slice of exposed flesh.

“Perhaps you can’t see it through the blue cotton of my shirt,” Jai says, inching closer to the man. “She’s mine, and if you value your eyes in your socket, you’ll show me a little respect.”

I swallow hard, both scared and a little turned on. The man at the door scratches the back of his scruffy head. “She doesn’t look like much of a fighter.”

“Yeah, well, don’t underestimate her. She’ll kick your ass.”

He grins. “I’m sure she will. We’ll see how well she does in three days.”

“Excuse me?” I chime in before Jai has the chance.

“Oh, didn’t I mention it?” He laughs an impish laugh, all while smiling widely. “Your girlfriend fights in three days too. Good luck. You’re gonna need it.”

With a flick of his hand, he turns and leaves, leaving Jai and I staring after him. The heat that once filled my body drains out through my pores, along with my color.

I’m going to fight.

In three days.

I push myself into a sitting position and pull Jai’s blue shirt on over my head before hugging myself tightly.

“You’ll be fine,” he says—or lies, rather.

I’m not going to be fine. I’m the only one down here who doesn’t know how to throw a proper punch. I don’t know how to block or kick—I don’t even know if you can surrender. Strangely, that’s not all that bothers me now. What bothers me most is that in three days’ time...I might not see Jai again. If he wins his fight and I lose, I’m out of here. If he loses and I, by some miracle, win, I’ll be stuck down here all alone. I don’t want either of those things.

“I’m as good as dead,” I utter, tucking my hair behind my ears.

He shakes his head. “I’ll teach you a few things. You’ll be fine.”

“A few things isn’t going to make up for a lifetime of no fighting. All my opponent has to do is push me over and she’s won.”

I let my head fall back against the concrete. I’m done for and I realize I’m closer to going back to my old life than I thought.

“Kitten—”

“Enough with the Kitten,” I snap, raking my fingers through my hair. “I don’t want to feel weaker than I already am.”

Jai turns his large body in my direction. His eyes are dark, his lips pursed into a thin line. All of his features say ‘don’t fuck with me’ and I don’t.

“It’s my fault you’re down here so it’s my job to take care of you, Kitten. You’ve got this round in the bag; I know you do.”

“And if I win and you get your money? Then what am I to you?”

It’s a question that has burned inside me for a few days now. Once I don’t owe him anything, what happens? He has his own plans down here; he wants to find his brother. There’s no way he’s going to choose me over his family.

“This—” He gestures between us, “—isn’t about the money.”

“Oh really?” I spit, rolling my eyes. “What’s it about?”

His eyes scrunch at the corners as they thin. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say what I said hurt him.

“You don’t believe me?”

I want to, but ten thousand dollars is a lot of money. I’d sell my kidney for ten thousand and maybe throw in my first born, too. “No.”

He nods, slowly, as if he doesn’t know how to process what I said. It makes me feel strange, watching him.

“You know what? I was going to wait until your first round to tell you, but since you’re so sure I’m an asshole, now’s the perfect time to reveal I don’t want the money back.”

My eyes widen and my heart inflates in my chest, limiting my breathing capacity. I didn’t see that coming.

“Why?”

“Because I fucking have money. I have lots of it—more than I know what to do with. Would the ten grand have helped me down here? Sure, but you need it more than I do.”

I feel odd sitting here in his T-shirt and having this argument with him. I don’t know how I should handle it...Are we friends? Are we more? Are we nothing, just two people being human? This whole time I’d thought he wanted his money back, but this morning he’s singing a different tune. Is it a result of the time we spent together yesterday, chatting and being carefree, or was it the sex? Was it that good? It has to be something. He saved my life—he doesn’t owe me anything, yet here he is, willing to temporarily throw his cause out the window to make my life easier.

“I’m a stranger to you. Why would you want to help me?”

Jai turns so I can’t see his face, only the rigid muscles in his back. I know the stance. I’m not getting an answer out of him and it makes me nervous. Does he actually want to help me, or does he have some kind of secondary motive? I’d like to think I can trust Jai, but something is holding me back. It could be the atmosphere, the situation, that’s preventing me from trusting him...or maybe it takes more than a pretty face to fool me. The shrink I saw a few times earlier this year would chalk it up to mommy and daddy issues. He’d claim I was finding it difficult, accepting the fact someone cares about me when the two people who were meant to didn’t.

I sigh. For the first time since meeting Dr. Stein, I hope he’s right. I hope it’s my issues preventing me from trusting Jai and not some weird sixth sense.

Because I need him.

I won’t survive alone.

Preparation

I pull the fabric of his shirt higher over my head. The sound of Jai beating his fists into the punching bag over and over is making me nauseous. He started an hour ago and I don’t know how he’s still managing to connect with so much power. I’m only listening to him and it’s enough to make my arms feel like jelly. I don’t know much about his punching technique, but he’s strong, that I know for sure. I can hear the material struggle to absorb his strength, hit after hit. The chain and the pipe he’s slung the heavy bag over creaks and complains, and I expect it to come crashing down every time he connects. Somehow, it doesn’t.

“You can’t hide under my clothes forever, Kitten,” Jai announces, amusement lacing his tone.

“Maybe not forever, but I’m happy with right now.”

Jai stops punching his bag and a small eternity later, a single, warm index finger circles my ankle and glides up my calf, leaving a line of fire in its wake. My breath is trapped in my throat when the finger falls away. Where will it appear next? I try to feel his presence, feel his body warmth, but it’s already so dense in here.

That’s when the shirt I’m using to cover my face is yanked away from me and tossed across the small space. Luckily, I put clothes on a little while ago, otherwise my goodies would be out for all to see.

I adjust my lime-green tank top and fold my arms.

“Get up. We’ve got training to do,” he orders.

I pout. There’s no way I’m punching that thing. What if I miss? What if I hurt myself, or pull a muscle? “I’d rather die.”

He sneers at me, his eyes flaring wickedly. “And you probably will if you don’t learn something before then.”

Jai extends a wrapped hand to me and I eye up the thick, blue fabric. It’s a killer color next to his tanned complexion.

“Why’s it wrapped?”

He smiles. “To compress the soft tissues of my hand when I’m punching faces.”

Charming. “I don’t have any wraps.”

He clicks his fingers impatiently and nudges his open hand closer. “Doesn’t matter right now. Get up.”

Defeated, tired, and still with a killer headache, I put my hand in his and let him pull me to my feet. He grins down at me when my head lolls to the side. His apparent happiness glistens in his blue eyes. I’m glad he’s happy, but I’m not on the same level. To be honest, I’m still a little bothered he ignored my question earlier. Why does he want to help me if there’s no money in it for him?

“How old are you?” he asks, angling his head.

Usually, the age questions is something you ask before fucking like animals. What if I was sixteen? Too late. “Twenty-five. Why?”

“Twenty-five? Are you sure?”

I arch a brow. What kind of question is that? “Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m twenty-five.”

“Funny. You have the exact same attitude as my sixteen-year-old sister when she’s told to do things. It’s unnerving.”

Instead of finding the fact he compared me to a sixteen-year-old annoying, I find myself endeared he even has a sister. There’s something about him loving and caring for a sibling that moves me. I bet all of her friends crush on Jai. Hard.

“You have a sister?”

He frowns. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like someone just handed you a puppy.”

My lips pull wider, despite Jai’s confused expression. Rolling his eyes, Jai presses his wrapped hand to the small of my back and nudges me towards the bag.

“I just think it’s sweet your sister has someone like you to look after her.”

He presses the fingers of his other hand to the bag to prevent it from swinging. The bag is tattered and worn—even more so now Jai’s had his turn with it. Dust floats in the air around it and I can taste it in my throat.

“My sister can handle herself. She’s stronger than any boy her age. I made sure of that.”

He moves behind the bag to steady it, and with a flick of his head, he says, “Show me what you got.”

I don’t move. “You know I don’t have anything.”

“You have something, we just have to find out where your starting point is. Punch the bag.”

“Jai—”

“I’m not asking you again, Kitten. Punch the damn bag.”

Clenching my teeth, I cock my arm back and punch the bag. A small pain tugs at my tendon and I pull my hand back as it spreads to my elbow. Cradling my wrist, I look at Jai. He’s less than impressed with me, for some reason. Punching is a lot harder than it looks.

“Well…” he utters, letting go of the bag and scratching his head. “That was pathetic.”

I scoff at him. “It wasn’t that bad.”

Jai plants his hands on his hips and narrows his eyes at me. “Out of ten, I was expecting you to at least be a three or a four in strength.”

“Okay.” I shrug. “So I’m a two, no big deal.”

He shakes his head and chokes on a genuine laugh. “No, baby, you’re a one—even that’s pushing it.”

“Baby?”

He steps around the bag and towards me, ignoring the last word that fell from my mouth. “You need to work on your stance. That’ll increase your power.”

I sag, letting my spine take the bulk of my upper body weight as Jai takes my hands in his. He moves my left hand.

“Your left hand should be five inches in front of your left shoulder.”

His fingers smooth over my wrists and into my palm. They touch softly, but with purpose as he curls my hand into a fist. “Your knuckles need to be parallel to the ceiling.”

As I watch his hands expertly glide over each of my knuckles, I can feel his stare on my face and my breathing steadily becomes labored as a result. I’d peer up at him if I weren’t so mesmerized by his thick, calloused fingers as they work so beautifully over my skin. A moment later, Jai moves to my right hand and I keep my left one where he shaped it.

“Your right hand should be by your right ear, not too close, and your right elbow glued to your ribs.”

My stomach clenches as he runs the tip of his finger along one of my ribs. Maybe I’m going to like this training thing after all.

“That’s it?” I ask, when he steps around me.

“Not quite.” His light tone excites me and hot air warms the back of my thighs.

Unashamedly, it lights me up like the Forth of July as his fingers return to my skin with a vengeance, sending fireworks shooting up my legs and exploding right between my thighs.

“Your feet should be planted shoulder-width apart and your weight needs to be isolated on the balls of your feet.”

“Why can’t I stand normally?”

He exhales and the air caresses my skin. “Because the balls of your feet are the first on and off the ground. On the balls of your feet, you have two points of power.”

I frown, confused. “And what does that mean?”

“Can I explain it to you when we have more time? For now, just listen.” He plants his hands on the back of my knees. The fabric tickles my soft skin and I can’t help the giggle that seeps from my lips.

“Your knees need to be bent. This’ll keep your hips down and help you when you throw a punch.”

I have no idea what that means exactly, but it doesn’t matter too much when I feel his large hands grip my hips. I have a flashback of yesterday, when he gripped my hips and drove into me. That’s all it takes for an unbearable heat to spread up my neck and into my face. I swallow hard. If he doesn’t take his hands off me soon, I’m going to overheat.

“Your right hip should be back, with the left hip pointed toward your opponent.” He speaks right into my ear, making my posture slacken.

Jai tightens his grip, putting a sexy amount of pressure onto a dimple in my lower back. Instead of completely turning to jelly on the floor, I tighten my core and straighten my spine. I want to impress him, to make him happy by listening to him. For once.

I feel him smile against my ear. “When you turn into the punch, your hips shouldn’t make a full rotation. You’ll lose power that way.”

Loosening his grip, he rocks my hips, flicking them slightly, but powerfully all at the same time. From my hips, his fingers spread onto my stomach, making me clench and gasp.

“Relax a little. The more you tighten up, the more you restrict the connection between your arms and legs. You need your movement to be fluid, but strong. Understand?”

I nod.

“I know you’re nervous about your fight, Kitten, but it’ll be fine. Hit this bag until you’re comfortable with the movement. If you’re balanced and relaxed the basics will take over. It doesn’t take a lot of muscle or power to knock someone out. You can do it.”

He moves away from me and I shuffle closer to the bag with new-found determination. Maybe this wouldn’t be as hard as I’d first thought.

“Like this?” I ask, waiting for his go ahead.

I shiver as he smooths two hard fingers down my spine, making me shudder. “Your spine was made to hold you up straight. I don’t ever want to see you slouching in a fight.”

I blow out a soft exhale. “Okay. No slouching. Got it.”

I swing at the bag and when my fist connects, the bag jolts backwards a little, much to my surprise.

“Good.” Jai praises from somewhere behind me. “Add a little bit more power to your punch and you’re good.”

I hit the bag over and over. By the sixth punch, my body is warm and my arms start to burn, but I feel lighter—faster. I pause for a brief second before peering over my shoulder. With his hands unwrapped, Jai pulls on a T-shirt and tightens the strings on his black pants. From the side pocket of his bag, he pulls another roll of money and stuffs it into his pocket. Eventually, his eyes meet mine.

“There’s someone I’ve got to see. Keep punching. Don’t stop until I get back.”

He bends low and slips into his sneakers before exiting without another word. He often disappears with money and I can’t help but wonder where he goes. A small portion of me wants to follow him, but the other portion knows it’s better to mind my own business. Whatever Jai’s into is not something I want to be involved in. His plan includes destroying Skull and I’m not entirely sure I want to be around to take the fall if he fails. Despite how strong Jai is, failing is still an option.

A scary, life threatening option.

Round One

I rub my sore knuckles before pressing the back of my hand to my mouth to stop myself from throwing up. For three days I’ve stressed myself to the point of physical sickness and I can’t take it anymore. I can’t fight, I’m not ready, but I don’t have a fucking choice. Although Jai’s happy with my progress, I’m not. My punches are still weak and they’re all I have to defend myself with. Jai is confident I’ll win, but I know better. My opponent is going to smell the diffidence on me and then she’s going to demolish me. In front of everyone. When that happens, Skull will see me as the fake I really am and Jai isn’t going to be able to do a damn thing to stop Skull from spilling what’s left of my blood.

Blood.

I hate the taste of it and yet, here I am, trying to convince myself to be locked in a cage with the possibility of drinking mouthfuls of it.

I contemplate staying in the room, but the lines of people who walk by on their way to witness Jai’s fight make it impossible. I have to be there if not to support him, then at the very least to watch him.

I push off my bed and join the mass of people filtering from the smaller tunnels and into the larger ones. As I enter the main area, I quickly slip away into the back of the room, and climb up on a big, pointless block of concrete so I can see over the heads of everyone else.

Then I see Jai.

In the cage.

All the warmth in my body moves south and I squeeze my thighs together as desire pools and pulses in hot waves. Wearing a pair of black gloves that don’t quite cover all of his hands, he flexes his fingers at his sides and every time they close and tighten, so does my core. Jai bounces on the balls of his feet and the cage recoils and shakes under his weight. Somehow, he manages to keep his balance, unbothered by the possibility of the chains snapping and sending him plummeting to his death. I’d be petrified, clinging for dear life to the rusty cage metal. As the chains grind against pipes and other pieces of steel, the smell of rust becomes distinct and in the spotlights, I see little specks of it float to the ground.

The crowd is up in arms once more, cheering for him to win, cheering for him to fail. Either way, my body absorbs each shout for him. Excitement heats my blood, enrages my nerves and causes little bubbles of sweat to emerge along the surface of my skin. Though the cheers would distract someone like me, Jai acts as if he can’t hear them—as if he were as deaf as he is strong. Occasionally, his gaze circles the large tunnel before locating me in the back corner. When our eyes lock, I see the very corner of his lips twitch, making my heart pound like nothing else. I let my stare roam his perfect physique. His shirtless torso is straight and tight, covered in rippling abs and beautiful depressions. I notice not one inch of his skin is marred by ink—strange given society’s obsession with tattoos. Jai strikes me as the kind of person who takes immaculate care of his body, always watching what goes in it and on it. It shows too. His physique is a masterpiece.

He crosses the cage and waits patiently as his opponent approaches the gate. His opponent is scary. Jai is tall, easily six-one, but this guy has him beat by a whole foot at least, and not only is he built high, but the width of his body is incredible too. He’s wide from his shoulders right down to his ankles. His bald head reflects light just as well as his glistening form and as he rolls his neck and cracks his fingers, his stare finally locks on Jai. I hold my breath as the two watch each other. If I were Jai I’d be petrified. If he does feel any kind of fear, he’s certainly not showing it. He’s ready to take on his opponent and I can tell by the way he flexes his fingers and holds his posture that he won’t hesitate to throw the first punch.

My attention flicks to the movement on the ledge above the cage. Seemingly bored, Skull leans on the dodgy railing, two bum boys behind him, as his eyes scan the crowd. My lips part as a shaky breath blows through. I’ll never get used to seeing Skull. The way the black ink around his eyes makes it look like he has no eyelids terrifies me and the gentle curves of the brain tattooed on top of his head is surreal. What made him want to do it to himself? What was happening when he decided to permanently scar his face? What thoughts went through his head? I wish I knew.

His mouth, and the tattooed teeth surrounding it, moves as he chews gum. He seizes up both fighters, his posture straightening when he sees Jai. I think I even see a smirk. Then, with a lazy nod, the fight begins.

Like I expected, Jai wastes no time in lashing out, swinging with brute force. The last few days, Jai has advised me against attacking first. He said I should gauge my opponent before attacking; learn their technique. It seems Jai’s taking a different approach. The brute takes a couple of quick steps back as Jai’s fists rain relentlessly down on him. The crowd murmurs in shock, sending a surge of tingles through me. The cage shudders, creaking louder with every hit. I see Jai’s core relax whenever he connects, giving him the ability to move quicker—more confidently. The brute might be bigger, but Jai is definitely more dangerous. As the large man brings his hands up to shield his face, Jai drops low and slams his knuckles into his ribs. Though monstrous, the brute has nothing on Jai.

He moves unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. There is stark beauty in the swift, controlled way he maneuvers his body and I become mesmerized in it—in him. The crowd cheers around me, but I hear nothing. All I see is him. Jai doesn’t hold back, not for a second, taking a more offensive approach. The brute he faces keeps to a tight circle near the center of the cage, moving back and forth only to defend, never to attack.

I chew the tips of my fingers, catching skin between my teeth as the scene changes. I watch in alarm as the round deteriorates by the second, the winner becoming obviously clear. Jai has turned rabid.

Veins in his arms are visible.

His clenched jaw, noticeable.

The loud growl that tears around the room, unavoidable.

Jai grabs the brute by the back of his neck and drives his face into the metal cage, over and over again. The rust cuts into his skin, scarring his face, but Jai doesn’t give a fuck. He roars again and I gasp right before he throws his opponent’s head down and drives his knee into his face.

Thump.

The sound of a kneecap smashing into a nose reverberates through me and my gut revolts at the level of ferocity being exhibited.

Thump. Thump.

I want to look away, but I can’t. Blood rolls down Jai’s leg and onto his bare feet, but the anger on his face doesn’t leave. Even as the brute’s body goes limp and collapses, Jai hits him. He doesn’t stop until two of Skull’s guys enter the cage and push him away before dragging the lifeless body off the canvas and away from the swinging death trap.

I watch Jai, shocked, and when our eyes meet, I don’t see embarrassment or sympathy. I see warning and darkness. I see Hell itself and it’s fucking terrifying. To my surprise, when I look at Jai’s opponent, leaning on the outside of the cage, he moves a hand to wipe the blood off his face. Relief rolls through me. I’d thought he was dead for sure. When Skull’s goons realize he’s alive, they leave him alone to wallow in his own self-pity. My heart bleeds and beats into my ribs for him. Like Jai said, most people leave here broke and broken, and this man definitely will.

The crowd begins to disperse, but I remain locked in my seat, unable to remember how to move my limbs. Jai has paralyzed me with this brutality and I’m not sure how I feel about it. Turned on? A little. Scared? A lot. What am I getting myself into exactly?

I peer up in time to see Jai being ushered in through a service door underneath Skull’s ledge. I gulp loudly, before shaking my head. I don’t have time to worry about Jai and what Skull wants with him. Later today, I’ll be in the cage.

Later today, I could be dead.

Expect the Unexpected

The wall in our little nook is dirty. Still, I rest my head against it, hoping to cool my burning forehead. Twelve minutes, they claim, until I enter the cage. A bout of nausea flashes through me at the thought. It has been three hours since I last saw Jai, panting and coated in someone else’s blood. It has been three hours since I saw Jai completely destroy a giant without getting hit once. As much as he terrified me, it’d be nice to have him here—to coach me before I go on. I need to hear how much confidence he has in me. That always makes me feel nice.

As the thought passes, the sound of shoes scuffing against the concrete forces me to open my eyes. I drag my stare up clean legs, black shorts, slim hips and a beautiful torso before it locks with blue eyes. They briefly catch my attention before a small black mark on his collarbone, no bigger than my thumb, takes precedence. It’s a tattoo. A new tattoo. I lean closer in an attempt to make out the swollen, black mark.

“A skull,” he says, his teeth clenching at the end. “They tattooed a fucking skull on me.”

My eyes lock with his. “What for?”

“So Skull can track fighters he’s interested in.”

I can tell by looking at Jai’s face that being tracked as a personal interest for Skull is not something he wants or needs. I wouldn’t either. The thought gives me the creeps.

“You were with him this whole time?”

He shakes his head. “I was with his entourage. Skull didn’t show.”

I swallow the concern I feel for Jai. Being marked by anyone isn’t a good sign, but I have other things to worry about. I lean back against the wall, but have no time to feel sorry for myself before Marcus, the man I met the day we entered the underground, pokes his head into our space.

“You’re up, Kitten.” He offers me a kind smile. “Good luck.”

I feel blood drain from my face as he disappears. This is it. The moment I’ve been dreading this whole time. I wonder who my opponent is and if she’ll be the same build as me. Knowing my luck, I’ll be pitched against Big Foot’s wife. She’ll have clubs for hands and tree trunks for legs.

“You scared?”

I’m as good as dead. “Is it that obvious?”

He doesn’t comment. Of course it’s obvious. He could probably smell it in the air. I can. It seeps out of my pores and clings to my skin. It turns my blood cold and makes my heart unsure. Jai described the feeling of the adrenaline that courses through your body before a fight a few days ago. He said it was something that builds up fight day and unleashes itself as the bell rings. I’m yet to feel any bout of adrenaline. All I feel are butterflies and wasps circling angrily in my stomach. I’m pretty sure all of my adrenaline now sticks to my clammy skin after being forced out through my pores by my nerves.

Jai strolls around the room, feeling damp, washed clothes and smelling dry ones. Eventually, he picks up a black tank top and pulls it on. “You’re going to do just fine.”

I turn towards him, and his full lips quirk into an adoring smirk as he watches me. Do I look that pathetic?

“You sound so certain.”

“I am.”

I narrow my eyes. “I’m not like you, Jai. What you see outside of the cage is who I’ll be on the inside.”

He frowns. “What does that mean?”

I recall images of Jai in the cage. He wasn’t human. Every shred of humanity he had left him. He was an animal and I wasn’t the only one shocked by his display of brute force.

“Oh, come on. You saw what you did to that guy. You could have killed him.”

His irises darken and I contemplate dropping the topic. Then again, what kind of me would I be if I actually listened to my conscience? Ever?

“But I didn’t.”

“He was one knee away from a concussion, or worse, death.”

Jai scoffs and turns away, bored. “I kneed him in his philtrum over and over. Worst case scenario, he lost some teeth. Big deal.”

“You didn’t even give him a chance.”

I don’t know why I’m defending Jai’s opponent. I guess I feel as though I relate to him in a strange way. I can sympathize with his soreness, his loss, and the disappointment he’s most likely feeling.

Jai snaps toward me, bending his torso in half so his face is directly in line with mine. “Give him a chance? We’re not in fucking primary school, Kitten. Down here, it’s a matter of life and death. Every move you make has to be one that intimidates everyone else.”

He swipes at a stray lock of black hair that curls around my cheek, making me flinch.

“You can’t give chances. If you do, you’re dead. They don’t care about you or your feelings. If they want to cheap shot you when you’re not looking, they will. You need to start acting like you know what you’re doing or they’re going to start attacking you relentlessly.”

Satisfied, Jai straightens his posture and folds his large arms. “Speaking of which, do you know who your opponent is?”

I swallow hard and shake my head. Why is a question like that important in a conversation like this?

“You remember the friend you made in the shower the other day, don’t you?”

I flinch. Oh. My eyes widen and a smugness falls over Jai’s features.

“You’ll be happy to know she personally chose you to fight in the ring today. You’re naïve, Kitten, and they can smell it on you. The second you open your mouth, weakness spills out.”

A strange burning sensation seeps across the surface of my eyes and tears threaten to bubble from my ducts. He’s right, but I never claimed to fit in here. I never sought this place out. I was trapped—dragged in kicking and screaming. I’ve barely been here a week and he expects me to be some kind of hardened warrior, like him. It doesn’t work that way. I’m a normal human being. I work a normal job and live in a normal house. I didn’t train for this. I didn’t want to be a part of this. This ‘brotherhood’ might make me feel alive and wanted like never before, but that doesn’t mean it’s me. This place isn’t me. Jai reaches out for me and I try to turn away, but the tips of his fingers catch my chin.

“You have to promise me that no matter what happens in the cage, you will not back down. You will not give her the chance to hurt you.”

I sniffle. “And how do I stop her from hurting me?”

His blue eyes flare sympathetically and it’s so gut-wrenching that it hurts me.

“Trust me” is all he says before he swipes my lower lip with his thumb and exits the room.

***

Strangely, the concrete beneath my feet feels extra cold as I make my way towards the cage. The room is thick with body heat and I can almost taste the sweat of everyone watching. People I pass on the way grab at me but I ignore them, focusing only on the rusted cage hanging above a tunnel God knows how many feet or yards deep. Fear, or maybe it’s that elusive adrenaline Jai was talking about, shakes my body and bubbles in my blood. I hate this. I hate not knowing the outcome. The odds weigh heavily against me, but Jai seems confident I can pull it off.

The cage isn’t empty, like it was when Jai started. My opponent waits for me and watches me intently as I approach. Her beautiful body is covered in thin straps of black and tan fabric. A sexy look I could never pull off. I decided to wear leggings and a tank top. I figured the less amount of flesh exposed to the rusting metal, the better.

I reach out for the cage door. It swings minutely, increasingly when my opponent bounces on her feet. I grip the gate and place a bare foot on the step. My stomach rocks with the cage, causing a bout of nausea to roll through me. I swallow hard, hoping to stop the vomit from forcing its way up my throat before I power chuck all over the canvas floor. I push myself into the cage and my attention locks not on my opponent, but on the canvas under my feet. Big stains of brown blood taint the surface and there’s no telling how old it is. It could be from ten years ago. I sidestep onto a lighter stain, but it doesn’t make me feel any less queasy.

Finally, I force my attention on to my opponent. I’ve stopped thinking of her as a human being and more of an objective. She hiccups and swipes at her mouth before sneering at me. Her friendly smile I remember from the shower that day is gone, replaced by the urge to win. I eye her up, ignoring the group of people closest to the cage who laugh at me. I’ve tied my long, dark hair into a tight ponytail, but she lets her auburn waves curl freely around her shoulders. Framing her face, strands of her hair stick to her clammy skin, and that’s when I notice her complexion. It’s a pale white; almost green. She blinks lazily before swaying to the side. I inch forward and she jolts upright again, bringing her fists up to her face. I swallow and peer out of the cage. I spot Jai immediately, leaning against a decaying column, his leg bent at the knee and his arms folded tightly across his chest. He watches me intently, and it makes me nervous. I don’t want to take my eyes off him until his attention flicks to the ledge above the cage. Blood drains from my body, sending my heart slamming into my ribs over and over again with a cramping pain. I drag my stare away from Jai and onto the ledge. As I look up, my sight locks with Skull’s and he tips his head to the side, analyzing me. I look away as quickly as I can.

Shit.

He knows. He knows I don’t belong here; I can feel it.

I shake my hands at my sides and roll my neck on my shoulders. I do something—anything I remember seeing the other fighters do in the cage. It isn’t until my opponent lurches forward that I realize Skull’s given his nod.

I dive out of the way as her vicious growl tears through the air. Adrenaline—I feel it now—tears through my veins hot and fast, making everything around me, except my opponent, blur.

Before I have a chance to secure my footing, she launches again and this time, her hard body slams into mine, knocking us both to the ground. It hurts more than I expect it to, but it’s not what has me groaning. The thought of lying on the dirty canvas sends spiders skittering over my skin. My opponent straddles my hips and sits up. Her fingers thread through the top of my hair, despite how tight I tied it back, and she squeezes while cocking back her fist. I clench my jaw and brace my face, but she wavers. Her face turns a little sleepy and her chest heaves, as if she’s trying hard not to throw up. I contemplate waiting, to give her a second to find her stomach, but Jai’s voice tears through my mind. You can’t give chances. If you do, you’re dead. They don’t care about you or your feelings. If they want to cheap shot you when you’re not looking, they will.

Twisting my core, I swing my hand as hard and as best I can from this position. I squeeze my eyes shut a split second before impact, then a burning sensation warms the palm of my hand as it connects so perfectly with her face. Wasting no time, I flick my hips and shove her off me. She crashes to the canvas and I roll away from her before pushing myself to my feet. I watch her as I blow my hair out of my face. Her arms shake as she struggles to lift her own weight. There’s definitely something wrong with her. Maybe she’s sick? Drunk? Hungover? Whatever it is, she’s not in full health.

“Finish her,” a deep voice yells through the crowd, pulling me from my stupor.

I turn towards it and see Jai leaning over the edge of the railing. I frown at him. I should at least let her gather her footing. The poor woman can barely stand. He narrows his eyes as I shake my head.

“If it’s not her it’s you, Kitten. End this. Now!”

I glance between Jai and the woman. I’ve never been more confused in my life. I’m not selfish at heart, not really, so to hurt someone when they’re clearly not ready for it is something I’m not sure I can do. But, in saying that, this is an extremely unorthodox situation. Is it okay to abandon my morals in a situation that’s do or die? Probably not, but I don’t have a choice. There are a lot of people watching. Every move I make has to be one of intimidation. I’m the weakest link down here. I know it and Jai knows it. How long before everyone else figures it out? Irrational anger builds in my chest at the thought.

I surge forward the second the woman finally climbs to her feet. Her back is to me, but that’s her fault, not mine. A small growl tears itself from my throat as I clench my jaw and jump at her. I wrap my legs around her hips and my arms around her neck. Once again, we crash to the canvas and the whole things creaks. With weak hands she pries at my arms, but she’s only wasting what little energy she has left. Without thought, I hit her in the face with a closed fist, over and over while holding her squirming body against me. She can’t fight me off and the feeling is...well, it’s empowering. I clench my teeth and strike her harder. She tries to protect her face, but my hands are moving too fast for her to slip any kind of defense under them. I hit her repeatedly until the muscles in my arm start to burn. As I pull my hand up one last time, I see red glisten across my skin and I stop. I’ve hurt her. I’ve made her bleed.

I release her and push her body away. She rolls onto her stomach, coating the canvas in fresh blood. It’s not a lot—not compared to Jai’s opponent, by any means—but I still forced it from her body. Shielding her face and whimpering, she shakes her head and flashes me the palm of her hand. It’s a gesture of surrender...and it makes me feel like shit.

My mind unblocks itself and the roar of the crowd explodes in my eardrums. I won. She surrendered and I won.

I like winning. I’ve always been the competitive type, but this feels different. I’m almost ashamed of myself.

I turn from the woman and head towards the gate that’s now open. I have to do something to take my mind off this fight. I don’t want congratulations. I want to lie down or throw up or drink until I pass out.

I saunter from the cage, my hands shaking like never before. They burn hot, as if I’ve toasted them over a warm fire. I don’t know what happened...I don’t know how I could’ve possibly won a fight. The woman, she seemed a little off, but still dangerous. Following Jai’s advice, I’d had to be brutal. I couldn’t give her the chance to hurt me.

I brush my hair out of my face and peer over my shoulder. The Russian woman, the one who so sweetly offered me her shampoo and body wash not so long ago, lies in a crumpled heap with a bloodied nose and mouth, blinking at the ceiling. My stomach revolts at the sight. I didn’t like hitting her, not one little bit, but it had to be done. Still, the ten thousand dollars doesn’t seem worth it now and I can’t help the nagging thought in the back of my mind that tells me I should find a way out before round two. I can’t go through that again.

“Ugh,” I grunt as I slam into a hard body.

The distinct smell of expensive cologne and cigars flood in through my nostrils. I recover quickly and stare at the widespread chest in front of me. Slowly, I suck in a breath as I drag my sights on to his face. His thick, slightly scarred lips pull into a wide smile, stretching the small white lines and it is not, by any means, a comforting grin.

“Skull wants to see you,” he says.

My heart stops cold. His voice is baritone and rough. It sends shivers skittering down my spine, and not in a good way. Why would they? I mean, look at him. He has roughly chopped black hair that frames his hardened face. His skin looks thick and coarse enough to rival a rhino’s, and he’s dressed in the most ridiculous attire for a dense, humid place like this. He’s wearing a black button-up shirt, rolled at the elbows, that exposes his Hulk-like arms, as well as a black pair of slacks and some cream snakeskin shoes. On his chest, a small gold cross lies against the fabric. He’s definitely part of a gang. One that likes to blend in with high society. If the outfit isn’t a dead giveaway, the large skull tattooed on the side of his neck is.

Questions run through my brain, one after the other, but none I want to entertain at the present time.

“Can I ask what for?”

He snatches my bicep in his freakishly large hands and squeezes until I wince. Instinctively, I jolt towards him.

“You can ask, Princess, but I ain’t gonna tell you.”

He yanks me forward and I desperately peer over my shoulder for Jai. The crowd is moving erratically and I can’t see him. I’m pulled and pushed, pinched and squeezed right up until we reach the service door I saw Jai go through earlier. He was gone for hours only to return with a ‘tattoo of interest’. I doubt I have something Skull is interested in. My fight wasn’t brutal, not compared to Jai’s, anyway, and the woman I’d fought was hardly in the right state of mind. Anyone could see that.

I hold my breath as he pulls me through the door behind him. The only thought in my brain is a single four-lettered word. It begins with F and ends with K.

Skull’s man holds me by the bicep and forces me to stand by a yellow service light underneath a concrete set of stairs that curl down to the right of the room. His grip is tight and threatening, so I don’t dare to move.

The room in front of me is a nice little set-up. To the left, there’s a small table surrounded by seven wooden chairs of varying quality. On the surface, poker chips and cards are scattered around the base of empty beer bottles. Across the medium-sized room sits a used, stripy sofa with cushions that look two decades old, covered in velvet and all kinds of stains. Neither of those are the reason for the jackhammers hammering away at my stomach lining. What worries me the most, is the tattoo chair that sits conspicuously in the middle of the room.

I swallow hard.

Shit.

Indications

“Unhand the girl, will you?”

I hear Skull’s voice before I see him.

The goon releases me the second I see Skull’s whiter-than-white sneakers step onto the dark, dirty concrete floor in front of me. I pull my stare from his shoes, up his black slacks and onto his white, formal shirt. For the occasion he’s extremely overdressed, but whatever statement he’s trying to make with his immaculate attire and gold cufflinks has been made. Skull has money. He has places he needs to be. He wants me to feel honored by his presence and I have to be if I’m going to get out of here without spilling my secret.

I eye his tie and the little diamond knife pin he’s centered in the middle of it. He looks elegant, yet dangerous. I assume, for whoever he’s seeing after this, he’s left little hints of just how dangerous he really is—like the skull tattooed over the face he was originally born with isn’t enough to scare you into making deals with him.

He’s wider close up, and taller. His tattoo makes my skin crawl and I’m having a hard time trying to decide if it’s in a bad creepy way or a good creepy way—if that makes any sense at all. I watch him closely as he saunters over to the tattoo chair and sits on the stool beside it.

“Am I in some kind of trouble?” I ask, eyeing the door beside me.

The man that pulled me into the room blocks it, foiling any getaway I might try to make. Anxiety awakens in my chest and prepares to wreak havoc. It begins by kicking up the tempo of my heart and restricting my lungs from expanding to full capacity.

“No, no trouble.” Skull taps his long, tattooed fingers against the larger chair. “I just want to chat.”

I contemplate suggesting we sit at the table, but then I see the gun sticking out of the back of Skull’s pants and remember he isn’t the kind of person open to suggestions. Forcing one shaky leg in front of the other, I walk as confidently as I can over to the tattooing chair, and I inhale and subtly let my breath out before sliding into it. Pursing my lips, I have to remind myself over and over that everyone down here knows who Skull is and what he’s looking for. I need to be like them. I need to treat Skull like I would any employer. I need to pretend his life is something I want to be involved in.

“I’m honored you’d want an audience with me,” I lie, flattening my sweaty palms against my leggings.

I don’t look at him when I speak. I can’t bring myself to see his tattoo so close. I feel him watching me for a little while before he decides to respond.

“Are you scared?” he asks, amusement lacing his tone.

I finally manage to gather the courage to look at him straight in his face. As my gaze locks onto the dark, tattooed circles around his eyes, I fight the urge to gasp or shriek. Imagine a skull being the last face you saw before dying. You’d be traumatized for the rest of eternity. Brain-dead or not, it’s not something you’d forget. What’s even more terrifying than the skull face is the throat he’s had tattooed on, too. If I ever want to see what the inside of a human throat looks like, I’ll never have to Google it.

“Of you?” I force a smile I’m sure he can see right through. “Absolutely.”

Skull chucks his head back and laughs. Fuck me. It’s actually genuine.

“I like you. You’re not stupid,” he says, letting his smile linger. “Now take off your shirt.”

I freeze before shooting a quick glance in the direction of the door. The goon pretends not to listen to our conversation, but I bet when I take off my shirt he’ll suddenly be interested in what we have to say.

“Excuse me?”

Skull reaches around the back of my chair and pulls a small table in his direction. On the table sits a stainless steel tattoo gun and a few other random bits and pieces. He reaches for the gun and adjusts something with his foot while I splutter, hopelessly.

“Take off your shirt,” he drawls. “I need your collarbone.”

“C...can I ask what for?”

Skull tips his head to the side, his black eyes glistening. “Normally, I’d tell you to shut the fuck up right before I have my friend over there rip your shirt from your body, but you’ve caught me in a good mood.” He leans closer. “I’ll answer your question, Emily, but this is the only time you’re ever allowed to question me when I ask you to do something. Understood?”

I nod compliantly, too dazed to comprehend what he said after my name fell from his lips.

“I like to mark those I’m interested in, and so far, you and your boyfriend interest me.”

“Why—”

He snaps forward, grabbing my lips between his fingers and squeezing them shut before ‘tsking’ at me like I’m a misbehaving dog.

“You have such a beautiful mouth. I’d hate to have to tear it from your face.” All signs of friendly humor and amusement fall from his face. “Take off the fucking shirt.”

He doesn’t have to ask me again. I grip the hem of my tank top and pull it off over my head. When I took my shirt off in front of Jai for the first time, I was embarrassed of my cotton bra, but here, I’m thankful for it. I’ll take any extra layer of clothing, no matter the fabric, if it prevents Skull’s soulless stare from kissing my skin.

Skull inches closer, the gun poised in his hand like a pen. Goosebumps prickle to the surface of my skin and the jackhammers in my tummy have broken through my stomach lining and are going to work on every other organ in that vicinity.

“I...I’ve never been tattooed before,” I say.

He grins wickedly and the gun buzzes to life. “I’m honored to be your first.”

The needle touches my skin. I inhale and flinch sharply. Skull grips my bicep in his hand, forcing me to stay put when all I want to do is fucking run. It’s cutting into my skin and burning like nothing else.

“The pain will fade once you get used to it.” He laughs over the buzzing of the machine.

It’s a lie, of course. The burning doesn’t fade, even after he’s finished. The entire time, I bit my lip and held back tears. I don’t know how he did it. Each pore filled with black ink on his body represents pain. A pain I never want to go through again.

When he’s finished, he applies a small amount of cream and tells me to put my shirt back on. Going off movies I’ve seen, I know I’m supposed to have my tattoo covered, but he doesn’t offer me anything and I worry about infection. I expect him to leave when he’s finished; instead he kicks the small table away and leans his elbows on his knees.

“Tell me about Jai Stone,” he says, randomly.

The mention of Jai and what I know sets me on high alert. I’ve never been tight lipped. I mean, I’ve never had a secret I’ve had to keep, but if he brings out that tattoo gun again, Jai might be in trouble.

“He has a sister,” I tell him, playing dumb. “A brother too.”

Skull seems less than impressed and his bored expression worries me. When men like him get bored, shit starts to happen. When shit starts to happen, people die.

“I don’t need a recap of his family tree. I fucking know it off by heart.”

Realization flickers over his face and the frustration turns to cunning happiness in barely a second. It’s unsettling to see.

“Speaking of which, you seem to lack a family tree. I bet that bothers you.”

I grit my teeth and he smirks when he sees it. He’s fishing.

“It doesn’t bother me at all,” I say, proud of my confidence. “I haven’t needed one yet.”

Skull surveys me, his eyes thinning into thoughtful slits.

“I could give you your family tree,” he states, resting his chin on his hand. “Tell you who Mommy and Daddy are.”

There it is. The one thing I’ve been thinking about since Jai told me Skull would know. Problem is, what does he want in return for the information? What information do I have anyway? Yes, we’ve had sex, but in retrospect, I barely know Jai.

“If you want information on Jai, I can’t help you. I’ve only just met him myself.”

Skull quirks a brow—or at least that’s what it would be if it were noticeable over the ink. “My man Steve tells me you two showed up together.”

Oh shit. I’ve fucked up the story. He’s going to see right through it. I keep my face calm, but there’s no stopping the heat from seeping into my cheeks. “We met minutes before coming underground. He’s still practically a stranger.”

Unsatisfied with my response, Skull runs his hands over his bald head and exhales, heavily.

“Since you have no ties to Jai besides being his fuck buddy, I have a job for you.”

I scowl at him. “I don’t work for you.”

Skull zips forward, closing the distance between us. I try to recoil, but get nowhere as he presses his chest against mine and our lips almost graze. My heart is in my throat, beating my esophagus to a pulp. I have to remember to keep my mouth shut. Smile and nod. How fucking hard is that to learn? Skull presses his finger to the tattoo on my collarbone, making me wince and hiss.

“You’re my Kitten now.”

I flinch at the mention of Jai’s pet name for me. I didn’t think it could sound any worse than it did already, but hearing it fall from Skull’s mouth did it.

“You’ll do as I say. If Jai does anything out of the ordinary, you tell me. If he so much as eats, showers or sleeps in a strange way you fucking tell me! Got it?”

I nod, fast. I’ll do just about anything to get out of this room, even if it means agreeing to betray a friend. I close my eyes as he strokes my cheek. His fingers are warm and sweaty and the feeling they leave in their wake isn’t something that sits well on the stomach.

“Good Kitty.” Dragging a quick finger across my lower lip, he pushes away from me. “I have an important dinner to get to. Congratulations on your fight. Hitting someone while they’re down is a special kind of heartlessness that’ll do well in my business. I look forward to your next one.”

He grins wickedly before reaching around to his back pocket and dropping a heavy roll of money onto my lap. I don’t take my eyes off him as he clicks at his goon by the door. Without a glance in my direction, they both head up the stairs and I’m alone in the room. I guess I’m supposed to see myself out. I slip off the tattoo chair and onto shaky legs. They still tremble as an aftermath of the fight. So do my hands, but inside me, there’s a different kind of movement. I’m not sure what it is...guilt, maybe. Skull is going to make me betray Jai and I don’t think I can. If I don’t, Skull will most likely kill me—he seems like that kind of guy. If I do, Skull will kill Jai and then me. Either way, this whole thing isn’t going to end well.

I force my tired body over to the door. With heavy eyelids, I open it and saunter out into the tunnels. Most of the crowd has dispersed, but the few that remain dance and chat and party like this is the best place to be. I wanted excitement too, once. After a day or two, I thought this was the best place to get it. Then I got in too deep and I couldn’t find my footing to get back out.

Now I know why the unknown is dangerous.

I scan ahead, searching the spattering of people for Jai. In the midst of all this crazy, he’s the only thing that has made me feel safe.

He steps out from behind a group of people and I freeze on the spot. Can he tell Skull wants me to betray him? Do I look different? More importantly, do I tell him? My legs feel weak. My hands still tremble and I do nothing but stare at him as he watches me. Briefly, his eyes flick to the ledge above the cage and his brows draw closer. I don’t have to look to know Skull is watching, and it’s enough to force my legs back into action. I move towards Jai, every step making me feel weaker and weaker. A foot away, Jai opens his arms and I dive into them, throwing my hands around his neck. My chest is heavy. I want to cry, throw up and scream all at once. Jai’s manly scent flows in through my nostrils and I breathe in the familiarity of it. Then his cheekbones brush against mine.

“You okay?”

If I open my mouth I think I’m going to cry, so I just shake my head instead. Not wanting Skull to see me like this, I pull back and straighten my shirt. Jai analyzes my face and I can see it in his eyes. He knows I don’t want to talk about it. So, to save face, he beams widely at me and claps me on the shoulder before tucking me under his arm and pulling me in the direction of our little nook.

Confession

We step into our space, and immediately, I shrug out from underneath Jai’s arm and sit on my bed. Jai lowers himself onto his own cot and our knees graze, but he doesn’t say anything. He sits and waits patiently, like he has all the time in the world. I see it on his face, though. He’s dying to know what went on behind that door, but I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to talk about Skull and what he wants from me. He called me Kitten and on my collarbone, he gave me a skull tattoo. He wants me to report anything Jai does that I find out of the ordinary. Everything, all of it—it’s too much pressure, and I don’t want to get caught in the crossfire.

“You did well,” Jai says after a few quiet minutes.

I look at him, surprised he wants to start with my fight, and not with Skull.

He sits with his elbows on his knees, his fingers nervously fiddling with each other. His dark blue eyes reflect the sympathy he feels deep down and it even manages to manifest on his lips too. For some reason, I feel better knowing we’re both unhappy. Sure, we won our first round of fights, but this is only the beginning and I can’t shake the feeling our real fights haven’t started yet.

“That doesn’t mean anything to me. She wasn’t feeling one hundred percent...my win was a freak accident.”

“It takes a lot to—”

“Kick someone when they’re down?” I cut in. “Yeah. So I’ve been told.”

I tug at my hair band and let my hair fall around my face like a messy curtain. It sticks to the sweat on the back of my neck and I hate it, but I don’t have the energy to do anything about it.

“I don’t know what was wrong with her...maybe she drank too much last night, or maybe she ate some bad food.”

“Maybe.”

I frown, unsure of the tone he’s used. For someone who cares if I win or lose, he certainly isn’t counting what happened this morning as a miracle. My first opponent falls ill the day we’re meant to fight and not once has he called me ‘lucky’. It doesn’t sit right with me.

“You’re not shocked?” I ask, tilting my head to the side.

“What do you want me to say? She got sick. Shit happens.”

No. I’m not buying it. “You know something, don’t you?”

He opens his mouth and I gasp, fitting all of the pieces together. I feel sick...I feel...I don’t know how I feel. My brain is unable to comprehend the act I’m about to accuse Jai of.

“You did something, didn’t you?”

Jai leans back on his hands, completely unfazed by my accusation. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to.”

I push off my bed and my organs finally decide to implode from all of the stress. I rake my fingers through my hair as tears gush from my eyes and I sob. I sob so fucking hard. I can’t handle this. I can’t live this life—the fighting, the cheating, the killing—it’s too much.

“That poor woman,” I cry, pulling at my hair as I pace the small area. “I cheated her. I cheated her out of her money, out of her spot here.”

Jai rises to his feet. “You didn’t cheat her out of anything. You played the game and you won.”

I snap my head in his direction and point a sharp finger. “You played the game for me! I never would’ve hurt someone for my own personal gain. Not ever!”

His jaw tightens and his blue eyes flare. “That’s why I did it for you. I knew your conscience couldn’t handle it. There are things we need to do here, Kitten, and I need your help.” His attention flicks to my tattoo before coming back to my face. “You’re in with Skull now. You’re in the perfect position to help me.”

I shake my head, sniffling, and trying to slow down the tears. “I don’t give a shit about Skull or your plan.”

I stuff my hand into my back pocket and pull out the dense roll of cash Skull gave me for winning my fight. I’ve never had money I didn’t want before. Or at least, I didn’t until now. It feels too heavy in my hands. It doesn’t feel like it should. As I look at it, the tears stop.

“How’d you do it?” I ask, keeping my eyes on the money. “How’d you incapacitate the woman?”

“I told you. Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers—”

“How?” I demand, squeezing the cash in my hand.

“I bought some Tramadol off Marcus and I crushed it up and poured it into her water.”

Tramadol. All of the stuff I learned on the narcotic springs to mine. It’s a narcotic-like pain reliever used to treat moderate to severe pain. It’s used for around the clock treatment, not ‘as needed’.

“Do you know how strong Tramadol is?” I ask, curious.

I mean, it’s not hardcore like morphine, but it’s a hell of a lot stronger than Tylenol.

Jai shakes his head. “You’re the nurse, not me.”

“They specifically ask you not to crush, break, or open an extended-release pill to avoid exposure to a potentially fatal dose.” I rub my forehead. “You don’t know her medical history. There’s a long list of things that need to be ticked off before a doctor even prescribes it to a patient. It’s dangerous.”

From what I can recall, weak or shallow breathing, fever, fast heart rate, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, loss of coordination and a few other symptoms are all warnings of an overdose. In the cage, her body wasn’t handling it well.

“She could be dead,” I announce, my eyes widening.

“She’s a little beat up, but that’s the extent of it. I watched her leave. She’s otherwise okay, Emily.”

But that’s not the point, is it? It’s the principle. Both Skull and Jai are using me to further their plans. Both of them do things without my permission—without my knowledge. It’s not okay. I step forward and shove my money at Jai’s large chest. He looks down at it, but refuses to take it from me.

“I told you I don’t want the money.”

Our eyes lock.

“You think I do?” I nudge him with it. “Either you take it or I throw it over the ledge.”

Reluctantly, he takes the money and I turn away from him.

“Where are you going?” he calls after me, but I ignore him.

If I’m going to survive here, I’ll do it on my own terms.

I’ll find my own room.

I’ll train myself.

I’ll avoid Skull and Jai at all costs.

Both of them are twisted and both of them are master manipulators. Neither can be trusted. I am the only person I can trust. I want excitement and I want to experience the unknown, but not at the cost Jai and Skull are asking for.

I don’t know much, but there’s one thing I know for certain. Win or lose, I’m getting out of here when I’m finished with round two.

The Kitten

Jai

Pathetic.

I fold my arms and lean against a worn, concrete pillar. Its eroded edges jab awkwardly into my body, but I couldn’t care less. The more uncomfortable I am, the less likely I am to fall asleep.

The cage rattles and groans, straining under the weight of two fighters as they dance around each other, terrified of being hit. With every foot placed and punch dodged, they seal the lid on their own coffins. Skull isn’t going to want either of them.

I turn my attention to the dodgy platform above the cage. Even though his graphic ink covers every inch of his face his disappointment comes through loud and clear. Standing here, watching this fight is a waste of time. It doesn’t matter who wins because, like I said, both are dead men dancing on borrowed time.

It’s not uncommon for fights to run at such a casual pace. I mean, I’ve seen slower fights, sure, but down here their pace just isn’t going to cut it. You see, Skull doesn’t want your average run-of-the-mill fighter. He wants someone ruthless, more visceral. To join his crew you need to be merciless, you need to be raw, and you have to be willing to peel the face off of your opponent without hesitation. Of course, that’s easier said than done. Every thug has a flaw, and for the men surrounded by the rusted metal of the cage, it’s fear. They’re governed by their fear of pain. You can see it on their faces. They let their thoughts get the better of them. They let their emotions hold them back. The trick to destroying anyone is to be emotionless. I learned that a long time ago. You have to dehumanize them—see them as a sack of meat without a family; without a face. Every strike you throw has to be hard, fast, unforgiving, and thrown with the intent to kill. When you’re content with murder, there’s no fear.

Only purpose.

I flick my stare from the ratty cage and over to the right side of the room, spotting her immediately.

Kitten.

A painful pang of guilt twists my stomach. Fucking Kitten...I saved her ass and I guaranteed her a place here. Still she acts as though I’ve ruined her life. Emily treats me like I’m a bad person when I’ve been nothing but good to her. So I drugged a woman in order for her to win her round. Big deal. She wouldn’t be feeling so self-righteous if she knew what I had protected her from. Her opponent was Marishka ‘Killer’ Dimitrikov. I’d seen her a few times around various underground circuits. If the name isn’t obvious, the girl is dangerous—was dangerous. Once, I witnessed Marishka beat a grown man into submission. Though she’s tougher than she looks, Emily, the tiny but feisty Kitten, wouldn’t have stood a chance.

Involuntarily, my gaze glues itself to the light sheen of sweat on her throat. The spotlight she stands by makes the bead of sweat that rolls into her cleavage visible, along with her heaving chest. As I watch her, I can almost feel her warm breath on my skin. She’s the most peculiar little thing...Hauntingly beautiful in that ‘lost’ kind of way. At a glance, she’s almost naïve looking, but that glint of mischief in her eyes tells you she’s not the kind of girl you can manipulate.

She slips a portion of her tongue out to moisten her dry lips and all of the muscles in my torso tighten. To think that with all of the action going on around me, she’s the only thing that sends my heart pumping faster than the pistons on a steam train. It feels as though my heart will tear through my chest and take flight at any second.

Infusing with the guilt swirling in the pit of my gut is lust, and I swallow in an attempt to moisten my dry throat. It’s the same stroke of lust that got me into this mess—the very same that fucked my plan and dragged down an innocent with me. As if that’s not a dangerous enough mix on its own, coiling tightly around the lust and guilt is a fierce emotion I haven’t felt in a long time—an emotion I’m not good at controlling.

Jealousy.

It carves its way through my bones, making sure it’s felt, and I hate it. Just thinking about her tummy tightening, limbs trembling, and heart pounding, caused by the men fighting in front of her, does crazy shit to my brain—to the jealousy in my bones.

And I.

Fucking.

Hate it.

The jealousy coursing through my body isn’t because I’ve caught feelings for the stupid girl who followed me through the darkness from the safety of the train. It stems from the sense of ownership I feel I have over her. I’ve been around her. On her. In her. I saved her life, I’ve kept her out of harm’s way and I’ve provided for her. I’m not about to step down now. Not when she needs me the most—regardless of how she sees it.

A heavy thump sends the crowd into a frenzy and I keep my eyes on Kitten. She startles and swipes at a dark lock of hair stuck to her forehead. Then, her pretty, large eyes widen and sweep over the crowd. I try not to smirk as her terrified gaze seeks me out. It always does. She might be ignoring me, but she still needs me. I keep her safe and she knows it. As her stare meets mine, her body visibly relaxes, but her face hardens. Electrical currents dance along my spine and I don’t dare tear my eyes away. The current fight is the last fight for round one, meaning that round two is fast approaching—for the both of us. For the last eight days, I’ve given her the space she requested, and I haven’t engaged her in any conversations and yet she still regards me with as much resentment as she did the day before. I can’t take it anymore. I’m giving her another day to get over it on her own. If she doesn’t, then it’s up to me. I need to snap her out of her foul mood before it gets her killed, and me along with her. I get she doesn’t want anything to do with me, but she’s my responsibility. It’s my duty to get her out of here alive.

Eventually, her stare returns to the cage and mine follows suit. The red-head parades around the pen, his arms up, demanding praise for his victory. I didn’t see the knockout, but judging by Skull’s face, it wasn’t that impressive. Skull taps his fingers along the railing with deadly purpose. I’d say he’s contemplating the outcome of the fight. I’d also say he’s about to change it. The crowd roars on, oblivious to the epitome of frustration lingering above their heads. Skull glances over his shoulder at two of his men and gives a swift jerk of his head. They leave through the small exit and Skull turns his attention back to the crowd. His eyes flick over every person that cheers for the insipid fighter and when his stare sweeps to the right side of the room, he pauses and his lips curve into a wicked smirk. I don’t need to follow his line of sight to know he’s looking at Emily. No matter where she stands he always finds her, always torments her with his fucking smirks. As far as Skull’s concerned, he owns Kitten, and he’s tattooed a skull on her collarbone to prove it. A small itch irritates my own collarbone in the exact same place Skull had his goons etch their foul ink into me. Skull thinks he owns me too, but it’d be a cold day in hell before I let that happen. I’ve never desired having a tattoo and the thought of someone putting one on me without my permission makes me sick. But these are the things I have to do.

To save Joel.

To save Kitten.

To bring Skull’s empire down and bury him six feet under. The streets won’t be safe until he’s gone and, sadly, there’s not a judge in New York City he doesn’t control, and there’s no jury that’ll convict him. Death is the only outcome for a man like Skull.

Skull lazily raises a long, thick, and tattooed arm and suddenly, the crowd falls silent. He amuses over the silence for a small eternity and leans forward on his elbows against the railing in front of him. His posture is loose, his face slack. To the untrained eye he comes across as casual—happy even—but it doesn’t fool me. There’s no humor in his eyes, or in the way he clenches one of his fists. Below him, his goons enter our space—a space I now like to refer to as ‘general population’—and I know they’re not here to hand out lollipops, that’s for sure.

I push off of the column, neglecting to brush the dust off my black tee, as Skull chuckles. I don’t like the way it sends dread hurtling through my stomach. It sets me on edge.

“You win,” he announces, smiling ruthlessly. “That means a congratulations must be in order, right?”

The winner cheers and smiles triumphantly, thrusting his fists in the air.

Poor bastard.

Adrenaline must be pounding so ferociously in his ears that he can’t hear the malevolent tone in Skull’s voice. A tone that spits so much acid it’s eating away his victory. I scan the crowd. They hear it and they’ve backed away from the cage as a result. I don’t take my eyes off Skull as I sidestep through the crowd, slowly making my way over to Kitten. She won’t be able to handle what’s coming. She never can.

The cage rattles and creaks as his two boys pry open the cage door. I shift my attention to Emily who’s watching intently. Warm, sticky, and murmuring bodies slide against me as I squeeze between the spectators, lessening the gap between Emily and me. I take three more steps and a gruesome thump prevents me from taking a fourth. A collective gasp rings around the crowded space and I turn to the cage.

Crunch.

Thump.

Snap.

The sounds of the victor’s bones being turned to dust underneath heavy, leather boots is all I can hear. His copper red hair, now brown with blood, sticks to his skull and runs over his face. Bruises already begin to manifest, painting his twisted bones into shades of purple and blue.

“Wrong,” Skull shouts, pushing off the railing. “That fight was pathetic. Death to anyone who fucking bores me.”

He brushes his long, tattooed fingers against the shoulder of his red shirt before turning and disappearing through the hole in the concrete behind him. No one speaks and no one moves as his men grab the bodies and sling them over their shoulders. These two men, the fighters, will be the third and fourth bodies to go over the railing in six days, making tonight the third night I’ll have to hold Kitten’s trembling body. She has nightmares, I make them better, and still she hates me. It makes no sense.

Lost in my thoughts, I don’t realize just how close I am to her. I’m close enough to see the water that glazes the surface of her eyes, and wets her eyelashes. I’m close enough to see her nostrils flare, and chest spasm as she holds in her tears. I’ve never met someone so sensitive…so humane. My circle is filled with fighters—with killers. I don’t like what Skull’s doing, but it doesn’t stir any emotion in me. Does that make me a bad person?

I lift my hand, barely, and it brushes hers.

Am I a bad person?

Pain

Emily

Jesus!

I gasp and flinch away from the warm fingers suddenly caressing the back of my hand. I snap my head to the side and my pulse beats too fast under my skin as I make eye contact with him.

Jai Stone.

His eyebrows are drawn, his lips pressed into a firm line. It’s a look of concern and compassion—a look I’ve come to expect from him. I shouldn’t be so surprised he’s here by my side at the first sign of trouble. Jai always manages to find me when I need it, and I hate the fact that the distress plainly visible on my face, is the very reason why he finds me.

I’m not weak.

I straighten my shoulders to appear unbothered, despite the terror that clings to me. He should stay away from me. Didn’t he see the way Skull looked at me? He has me in his grasp, and that’s not a good thing for Jai. Especially when he wants Skull’s head and I’m the only other person down here privy to that information. Not to mention the fact I have an extremely low pain threshold. If Skull demands information while gripping the hilt of a knife, I might not be able to keep my mouth shut.

Despite our feud, I swallow hard and unclench my hand, exposing my palm. Two men are about to die and I need comfort. I need to be comforted by the only person who can comfort me. Warm tingles exude from his fingertips and dance across my palm. I marvel at the softness of his touch. How is such a thing possible with hands as rough and as calloused as his? I’ve seen what they’re capable of. The very fingers that offer me gentle comfort now, were clenched and dripping in someone else’s blood not so long ago. What else can his body mask so effortlessly I wonder? Deep down, is he a killer or a man who will do anything to save his brother? When it comes down to it, are the two that different? I can’t answer that. I don’t have anyone in my life I’d kill for.

My insides tighten with tension as Skull’s men carry the broken bodies from the cage and over to the railing. I study the thug’s faces, my heart threatening to beat holes in my chest. What is going through their heads at this moment? Do they feel any discomfort at all? Taking a life can’t be easy and I wonder if they think about it later on. Or are they dead inside? Maybe it comes easy to them—like doing the dishes or taking out the trash. I don’t know how they do it. I’ve had no part in it and yet I feel guilty, and I suppose in a way, I’m just as responsible for their murder as Skull is.

One of the goons, the one with the bald head and loose jeans, lifts the ‘winner’ over his head and holds him there for everyone to see. I look away from his twisted body. I’m on edge. My heart shudders and shakes like a million tiny birds are trapped inside, their thrumming wings unstoppable. Heat, a nervous heat, blooms in my armpits and down my spine. It takes everything in me not to cry. I want to cry, but I’m afraid of being weak and down here you can’t be weak. I want to be strong—like Jai. Maybe what bothers me most about what he did, is that he did it, seemingly without thought. He did what he had to do. There was no worry, no confusion. He pulled his emotions out of it and secured a position in round two. No one had to save him and no one helped him. He did it all on his own. Jai is strong and brave—and as much as it kills me to say it—I envy him. And I hate it.

Curious, I make the mistake of looking back to the thugs at the edge of the bottomless tunnel just as the second body goes over the railing. His lifeless body rises up through the air in slow motion before it plummets like a comet and falls out of sight. My stomach churns. My pulse slows to a laborious, sad beat, and it echoes in the silence of the room as quiet tears spill over the rims of my eyes.

“It’s over,” Jai murmurs in my ear and I close my eyes.

He moves behind me, caressing both of my arms with his rough hands. As the crowd dissipates, I let Jai comfort me for a little while longer. When I’m numb, I’m not mad at him. I’m not anything.

When everyone is almost gone, sickness oozes over me like slime and I fight the urge to power chuck everywhere. I help save lives. I don’t stand by and watch them end.

“It’s far from over,” I tell him, opening my eyes.

It’s not over until the last fight has been fought—until Skull has crowned his new minion. I’ll never kill for him. Skull can extort information from me, he can tease me, torment me, torture me, but he’ll never use me to take a life. I won’t have that on my conscience. Some of these other fighters choose to take lives...they choose to fight in the name of Skull. Jai included. Every day I ask myself why Joel’s life is worth more than anyone else’s. Why is he worth saving and risking your life for, but no one else here is? My anger comes back then, rushing through me like nothing else. It consumes me.

Burns me.

Fuels me.

I pull myself from Jai’s hands and storm away. I want nothing more than to leave my conscience and my virtues at the door, and to fight through this, doing whatever is requested of me. But I can’t. That’s not me. Don’t get me wrong. I am a fighter, make no mistake about that. I’m just not the kind of fighter they are. My battles are emotional, not physical. Most days, I fight for the lives of others so they can spend more time with their loved ones. That’s how I live my life. I can’t change now. I won’t.

***

I inhale deeply, letting the heavy, moldy air burn my lungs as I hold it in. I stare at the decaying wall in front of me, trying desperately to calm the painful pulse in my chest and where my head meets my neck. If my death doesn’t involve a fighter crushing me to a pulp I’m sure it’ll involve a brain aneurysm. Is it possible for your skull to compress and crush your brain? I feel like I should know this.

This place gives me a headache. I can’t handle it. The suspense, the drama, the games. How can people live like this? I take back every negative thing I’ve ever said about my previous life. I love it and I miss it.

It was so simple.

I got up, I went to the hospital, I came home and I slept. Rinse and repeat. I often begged for excitement or a change. Too many times I imagined a blackout at the hospital or a mugging on the train. I wanted something—anything—to happen to distract me from my everyday life.

Anything but this.

This is not what I had in mind at all. I close my eyes, exhale, and reopen them. I will make it through this. Somehow.

“Emily, I—” Jai stops as I turn to look at him.

I’m sure my eyes are red and puffy, my skin as white as snow, but I don’t care. It’s not like anyone else down here looks great either. Already the tunnels are taking their toll—on all of us. People are getting sick and others are going crazy. At this rate, Skull will have his winner by the end of next week.

I wait for him to continue, wondering what he possibly has to say that hasn’t already been said. His blue eyes, dark in this light, soften as he unfolds his large arms.

“You can’t hate me forever. Whether you like it or not, we’re in this together.”

Ah. This conversation again. I sniffle and shift my weight onto my right leg. “Together implies we are a team. You act on your own. That’s not teamwork.”

“What did you expect me to do? You were all over the place before the fight. I took charge because I knew that you, in your fragile state, wouldn’t have been able to handle it.”

“You don’t know me.” I snap. “I’ve been through more shit in my life than a trust fund baby like you. So your brother chose to join a criminal empire. Big fucking deal. Let him be. It’s obviously what he wants.”

A loud growl tears from Jai and I jump as he lashes out and punches the concrete wall. I clamp my mouth shut as my heart pounds like a million stampeding wildebeests. Broken pieces of skin stick out from his knuckles and blood begins to trickle over the busted flesh. The sight of it turns my stomach.

“My life is so fucking awesome because I have money, right? My biggest issue is a spoiled brother who chose to join a gang for attention, right?”

I wrap my arms around my waist. “I—”

“Wrong. Little Miss Orphan thinks she’s been through a lot? You don’t fucking know pain. You don’t know what I’ve had to suffer through.” He pauses to stare at me. Our gaze never separates, not until he exhales and cradles his bleeding hand. “I can be your best friend or your worst enemy, Kitten. I can help you get out, or I can leave you to rot. Either way, I’m getting what I came for.”

With his clean hand, he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a roll of cash. It’s the money from my win. For days we’ve been tossing it back and forth, neither of us wanting to claim it. Jai tosses the roll at me and I clumsily manage to free my hands and catch it before the paper hits the damp ground. I look at him.

“Make a choice,” he says, before turning and leaving.

I stare down at the money. I’ve detached myself from it. In my hands, it feels alien and wrong, but I guess Jai is no longer giving me a choice. What kind of pain has he possibly endured? I want to know.

Sighing, I pull a hundred dollar bill from the roll before bending low and stuffing the rest of it underneath my pillow. I sloppily fold the money and slip it under the waistband of my jean shorts. I’m heading to the bar.

God knows I need a drink.

Gifts

Jai

I stuff a handful of cash into my back pocket and pull a clean t-shirt over my head, inhaling the fresh cotton. I’m quickly running out of clean clothes. I push my arms through the holes and pull it down over my stomach. At some point I need to gather my laundry and wash it in the bathing area. I’m tired of everything smelling like blood, rust and mold. It already hangs thick in the air. I don’t need to wear it too.

Behind me, shoes scuff against concrete and I glance over my shoulder, hoping to see Emily. Instead, an intoxicated Raf stumbles by. I take in his swollen eyes and clammy skin before looking away. I don’t blame him for indulging in the drink. One of the fighters who went over the railing was his friend and roommate. It’s a bad situation no matter how you look at it, but at least it will encourage him to fight harder. If he doesn’t, if he fights like his friend, he’s as good as dead.

Speaking of roommate, where the fuck is Kitten? She’s been gone for a while now and I’m willing to bet my next winnings she’s out doing something stupid.

Guilt turns my stomach at the thought of her and the way she looked. It’s been years since I’ve lost my cool like that. Normally, I can channel it and use it in my fights, but earlier, I had no control over my anger. I hate that about her. No one has made me as mad as she did for a very long time. What is it about her that I find so damn irritating, yet so endearing in the same instance? Maybe it’s me. I’ve always had an affinity for lost creatures—animals, insects, humans—I’m lured to the ones that don’t have anywhere to go. Emily is lost. She doesn’t see it, but her old life is a weight strapped to her petite ankles. If we aren’t killed down here and we make it out in one piece, I’d like to help her find her true calling. I think I’m destined to fight for the rest of my life since it’s all I’ve done for so long, but Kitten can do anything… and I want to help her. It’s the least I can do after everything we’ve been through.

I look down at my battered hand. Dry blood coats the cuts and grazes, broken skin juts out of place, and the bruising around my knuckles is starting to show. I clench my fist and my jaw clamps shut at the same time my skin stretches and my bones complain. If I have to fight in the next few days, my right hand will be out of order, and it won’t matter how good I am. A weakness is a weakness, and any fighter knows exactly how to exploit it.

“What’s your pain?” she asks, a strange slur attaching itself to the end of her sentence.

There she is. Slowly, I turn around. Kitten sways and blinks for a second too long. She’s drunk as fuck—a very dangerous state to be in, between the bar and our room. How she made it back unscathed is a feat all on its own. Hair that was neatly tied back is now disheveled like she’s spent the last two hours nervously running her fingers through it.

I frown. “What?”

“What—” she hiccups and closes her eyes. “—is your pain?”

Her lids are heavy, pulled down by the effects of the alcohol she’s obviously guzzled. Eventually, she manages to haul her eyes open.

I lift my sore hand. “A few busted knuckles. It looks worse than it feels.”

Her head lolls back, impatiently. “That’s not what I meant.”

“I know.”

She wants me to tell her about my life—about the pain I was referring to—but now isn’t the time. Besides, I don’t particularly like rehashing my past to others. Only my family knows the heartache I’ve had to face…because it affected us all.

Realizing I won’t tell her, Emily sighs and turns toward her bed. “I consumed a boatload of booze just to gather the confidence to ask you that question, asshole. The least you can do is answer it.”

And maybe I will answer it…one day. Stuck in her ponytail, I spot a large piece of cobweb—spiderless, lucky for her.

“Why?” I ask, stepping closer.

Emily freezes, her body as stiff as stone, as I reach out and pull the cobweb free. Her brows, no longer perfectly tweezed, draw together and her lips part, expelling her hot, quick breath. I let go of the soft, broken cobweb she doesn’t see and it floats to the floor.

“Because you scare me.”

She angles her body so she’s facing me front on. Her shoulders are tense and her nerves are frazzled. I know because they’re crackling between us like lightning. Subtly, barely three inches from mine, her chest begins to heave as breathing becomes difficult.

I angle my head. “I scare you?”

She nods, swaying slightly. “Not all the time…sometimes.”

I swallow hard, taking down words like ‘don’t be scared’ and ‘you have nothing to be afraid of…because she should be scared, and she does have something to be afraid of. I’d never cause her any physical harm, but emotionally…emotionally I’ve already betrayed her. I’m not like Emily, the New York City nurse, carer of the sick and wounded. I’ve done terrible things to get where I am. I’ve taken a life—four lives—and I did it without remorse. If she knew…she wouldn’t be here with me now; and I need her.

I need her, and not just for my plan to ruin Skull, either.

I need her selfishly.

I need the sense of normalcy she brings to my life. She stops me from going crazy. She keeps me out of my own head. That’s the thing about revenge. It’s not a temporary state of mind. It’s a sickness, a disease that consumes you inch by inch until nothing else matters. My hate for Skull runs a hell of a lot deeper than my brother working for him. Skull is the reason I lost my parents and my sister. Joel working with Skull is the cherry on top of the fucked-up sundae that Skull has served me. I won’t sit idly by and do nothing. Not this time.

I need her to give me a sense of normalcy—to stop me from going crazy, to keep me out of my own head.

“Good.” I state, taking a slight step away from her trembling lips. “I should scare you.”

I turn from her and take a step toward the door. I’m stopped when her small hand wraps around my wrist. It feels nice—better than nice. I love the way she feels. I love how soft her skin is even though she’s been underground for weeks.

“You also make me feel safe.”

I look at her, conscious of her soft fingers that glide up my arm and rest at the elbow. I study her sheepish expression, and it isn’t until the naked fire in her irises raises to a blaze that I see what she truly wants. A little bit of booze is all it takes to turn her disgust and hatred for me into desire? Then what? She goes back to being pissed off in the morning? I’d rather her stay pissed so I don’t have to deal with the whiplash.

“I thought you hated me,” I state, inching closer.

I tower over her and she cranes her neck to meet my eyes. She’s pretty from every angle. I wonder if she knows.

Her eyes narrow, her shoulders square. “I don’t hate you. I hate what you did, there’s a difference.”

“I saved your ass.”

She clenches her jaw and swallows hard. “You could have asked me if my ass needed saving in the first place.”

That’s a no brainer. “It did.”

“Not your call to make.”

Not my call? “Like hell it isn’t.”

What goes through her head, I’ll never know.

“It’s not, Jai. I’m big enough to make my own decisions. I don’t need you.”

I absorb my flinch on the inside, not allowing it to cross my features. She doesn’t need me? I know she doesn’t mean it in the way my emotions seem to be processing it, but nonetheless, it kind of stings. Frustration nags at my chest and rage tightens my muscles.

Rejection. That’s what I’m feeling. After everything we’ve been through, after everything we’ve done, she doesn’t need me? I take in her clothes—clothes I put on her back—and that’s not all I’ve done. I put money in her pocket. I saved her fucking life. Twice. And she has the balls to say she doesn’t need me?

“You ungrateful little—” I grip her face and crush my mouth to hers, pouring all of my frustration into it—into her.

She kisses me back too. Her mouth, hot and wet, greedily devours mine. I push against her. She pushes back. Emily pulls at my shirt and claws my skin. Like fuck she doesn’t need me. I sink my teeth into her bottom lip and bite down until she hisses. With a slap on my shoulder, she pulls her lip free.

“Ow, you bit me!”

I smirk sardonically. “Don’t pretend you didn’t like it and bullshit you don’t need me, Kitten.”

She glares, folding her arms over her chest. “You think you’re so clever, don’t you, Stone?”

Narrowing her eyes, she leans in, her stance challenging. The kitten has lion sized balls. Who knew?

“Don’t you wanna drug me first?” She says in a low, threatening tone, taking a shot at my integrity. I’ve never drugged a woman for sex in my life and I’m not about to start with her.

I laugh once. The fucking nerve. “Ah, the bitterness of rejection. It’s not a good look for you. Didn’t need to drug you the first time, Kitten. I doubt I’ll need to do it the next time either.”

Emily scoffs. “What makes you think I’d ever—”

I descend on her, claiming her lips with my own once again. She stumbles backwards and I follow, neither of us stable until the wall catches her and she grunts into my mouth. I want to pull away and mock her. I want to chastise her for being full of shit, but then we’d start arguing again and she’d stop talking to me. I can’t handle that hell. I like hearing her voice. Underground feels colder, lonelier, without her friendship—Jesus Christ. Listen to me. Can I sound any more ridiculous? If I keep this up, we’ll be braiding each other’s hair and chatting about our crushes by the end of the week.

I pull away and her eyelids flutter open. Her anger is gone and now I think about it, so is mine. We shouldn’t be fighting each other. Not when we’re already in the middle of a war.

“Can I tell you something?” I ask.

Her head falls back to rest against the wall and she blinks tiredly up at me. “Mmm?”

“You taste and smell like a Russian cab.”

When it sinks in, a large, goofy smile cracks her lips and teases my own. “A Russian cab, huh?”

I nod. “How much did you drink?”

“I went there with a hundred dollars and I came back with…” I step back so she can fumble through the pockets of her jean shorts. A small eternity passes before she pauses and glances up at me. “Nothing. I spent all of it.”

My eyes widen. “All of it? You drank a hundred dollars worth of shitty Vodka? Where are you storing it all and how are you still alive?”

Yawning, she slides out from between me and the wall. “I can hold my alcohol very well, thank you very much.”

“I believe you.”

With heavy shoulders and a sway in her steps, she drops onto her bed. The mesh creaks and complains, but never rips.

“This doesn’t solve anything, Jai. I may be drunk and a little turned on, but I’m still mad at you,” she mutters, pulling her knees into her chest and shutting her eyes.

“I know.” I sigh, raking my fingers through my hair.

She’s so still, so peaceful, I don’t even know if she can hear me.

“I know you are.”

***

“Stone?” Marcus whispers through the darkness.

Finally. Pushing off the wall, I step out of the shadows and into the murky, orange light.

“You get what I wanted?”

Marcus glances over his shoulder and runs his free hand through his brown hair. Apart from Emily, Marcus is the only other person I trust down here. Why? Because the money I give him pays for his daughter’s cancer treatment. Without me, she’d be struggling to breathe.

He tugs nervously at the collar of his tattered blue shirt and blows air out of his cheeks. I don’t think I’ve seen him so nervous. He’s been calm the last few times I’ve dealt with him, even when I had him retrieve the Tramadol for me.

“Barely,” he replies, pulling the handgun I requested out from underneath a brown rag. “What the fuck do you need a gun for?”

Even in the dark I notice the judgement in his dusky eyes. I’m not about to tell him. Marcus might be ‘my’ guy down here, but I don’t trust him. He has a price, you see. He can be bought. He has responsibilities—weaknesses. I can’t put my trust in a man who has weaknesses. Kitten, on the other hand, has nothing Skull can use against her.

“We have an arrangement, remember? I give you money. You get me what I want.”

He nods. I’ve known Marcus for a while. We met at another underground circuit a year or so back. When he told me Skull’s goons approached him to be their errand boy between us and them, I knew I could use him. He’s the only one of us who’s allowed in and out of the tunnels. He’s the only one I can pay for information. Sadly, that plan (so far) has been a fucking flop. Skull is smarter than I thought. Marcus may work for him, but he doesn’t trust Marcus for shit. I’m yet to squeeze a slither of useful information from Marcus about Skull and his whole operation, but that’s okay. The universe threw me a bone—the bone of a small kitten. I don’t need Marcus for information anymore. I have Emily. And as far as Skull’s concerned, he has Emily too. It’s almost too good to be true. It’s only a matter of time before Skull wants Emily. As far as he’s concerned, she’s mine and Skull always wants what he’s told he can’t have. If I can just get in the same room as Skull and Emily—at the same time—I can plant the seed of competition. Skull hates being contested.

Marcus hands me the Kahr PM9. For a smaller gun, it fits nicely in my palm. It’s not heavy, about fourteen ounces and can be concealed nicely in my waistband. I chose it for that specific reason because if I get caught with a gun…I’m fucked.

“And the other stuff?” I ask, tucking the gun away in the back of my waistband and concealing it with my shirt.

His brows draw together as he pulls out the small bottles of shampoo and conditioner. “This is a weird request, even for you.”

I hold out my hand and avoid his eyes. “It’s not for me.”

Placing the shampoo and conditioner in my palm, he tips his head to the side, studying me curiously. There’s an amused smile on his dry lips and I ignore it as I stuff the products into the pockets of my cargo shorts.

“That for the kitten?”

I swallow, not wanting to answer the question. From the pocket of his torn jeans, he retrieves a packaged toothbrush and toothpaste. I snatch them up before slipping them into my pockets.

“I’ve seen you two walking around here. Who knew romance could blossom in such a dark place?”

I scoff. Romance? I don’t have time for romance. I look at him.

“She’s helping me. That’s all.”

Tucking the brown rag under his armpit, he folds his scrawny arms. “She needs clean hair to help you?”

From my back pocket I retrieve his payment. Two thousand dollars is the most I’ve paid for shampoo and conditioner, I’ll tell you that, but I didn’t get it in hopes of Emily falling for me. I did it because she’s right. I should have spoken to her before I drugged her opponent. I shouldn’t have made her feel weak and incompetent. I don’t regret what I did, but I do regret the way I went about it. The shampoo and conditioner are peace offerings. I want to put the whole ordeal behind us and move on.

“You ever slept in the same room as a girl with long, unwashed hair?” I ask him and he shakes his head. “It’s like sleeping next to a dog. An oily, smelly dog.”

I may have exaggerated a little. Emily’s hair doesn’t smell, not really, but it is oily.

“Denial is a dangerous thing, Stone, and see-through as hell.”

“I’m not in denial.”

“You sure? I mean, you did just fork out two thousand dollars for fucking hair products.”

He flicks his stupid, bushy eyebrows at me and with a frown I turn my back to him.

“Fuck off, Marcus.”

Consolation

Emily

My mouth tastes like ass and, well, more ass. My head rumbles so loudly, I can’t bring myself to open my eyes. Even the murky, orange service light above my head bores down on me with the severity of the sun. I bury my face into my firm pillow and breathe in its clean, crisp scent. I like the way it smells and I revel in the subtle masculinity of it. I pause as the scent resonates with my body and the realization that I don’t have a pillow sinks in. Without physical provocation, my nipples harden and goosebumps raise the subtle trail of hair down my spine. I know the smell. I’ve laid with it, filled my lungs with it. I’ve tasted it on the tip of my tongue and rubbed my naked body against it.

Squinting painfully, I open one eye and blink until the lines in front of me sharpen and shape the strong jaw less than an inch away from the tip of my nose. His skin is darkened with shadow and faint regrowth of hair. His eyelids are folded over his eyes, shielding me from his thoughtful blue irises. How’d I end up here? I distinctly remember falling asleep on my cot. I don’t recall him coming back or moving me from one bed to the other. Was I that intoxicated?

Jai’s torso moves peacefully, pushing against my chest and falling away a second or two later. It pushes again, then it disappears. He’s relaxed—completely at rest. Opening my second eye, I lift my head to asses our level of entanglement. His strong thigh rests between mine, my left knee hiked up over his hip. Now I think about it, my right thigh and ass cheek are numb from the heaviness of his leg between mine. Across my waist he rests his large arm while the other lies behind my neck. My bladder aches with fullness, as the thick buttons on my jean shorts dig painfully into my skin. Nausea rolls over me in waves, timing itself perfectly between every throb of pain against my skull. I’m in hell—a sick, agonizing, yet semi-erotic, hell.

Careful not to wake him, I somehow manage to shift his arm and push myself up on my elbow. Getting out from underneath his arm was the easy part. My leg on the other hand…pins and needles run rampant up and down my muscles. I can’t take it anymore. I twist my body ever-so-slightly, biting my bottom lip against a giggle that threatens to bubble up my throat from the dreadful tingling sensation in my right leg. When I attempt to pull my leg back, Jai shifts a little and I snap my head in the direction of his face, ignoring the way my brain slams into the front of my skull. His brows are drawn, his hair a mess. I can only imagine how I look right now—tangled hair, bloodshot eyes, and clammy skin. It’s not fair that I look like this when Jai looks like he rolled out of the pages of a magazine. I really should stop watching him sleep. If he opens his eyes I’ll look like a major creeper…but I can’t look away. I’m caught up in the absolute beauty and perfection of his sleeping state. Wow. How fucking creepy is that? Even so, I can’t take my eyes off of him—off his beautiful, full lips.

“Why are you staring?” he mutters, his eyes still closed.

I startle as heat hot enough to rival fresh, naked lava burns through my face. Was I that obvious? Was my breathing too heavy? Oh, God. Please don’t tell me I was breathing heavy.

“I wasn’t staring.” I say, my voice a little too high and a tad too defensive. I clear my throat. “I was contemplating whether or not I should wake you up. My leg is numb.”

Nice save, you lying creep.

Jai opens his eyes, failing miserably at keeping the smirk from touching his lips. “Whatever helps you sleep at night, Em.”

Em? That’s a first. Could it be that ‘Kitten’ is finally falling from his vocabulary? It would be awesome if he regularly referred to me by my real name and not some weak, naïve animal.

“Why am I here, anyway?”

He tucks his hands under his head and it takes a lot of energy I don’t have, to keep my eyes on his face and not on his arms. What is wrong with me this morning? It’s like, at some point during the night, my libido snuggled up with my brain and now it refuses to leave. He quirks an eyebrow.

“You stalked me from a train.”

“No—” I exhale, rolling my eyes. “—not here. I mean here, in your bed.”

He shrugs. “You tell me.”

“I’m asking you. I wouldn’t ask if I knew.”

“At some point during the night you slipped into my bed.”

“That’s it?”

He nods. “That’s it.”

Oh. Well, that’s anticlimactic. Pun intended. “Did I say why I wanted to sleep with you in your bed? I am mad at you after all.”

Or at least I was. I’m feeling okay this morning—emotionally, anyway.

Dropping his fresh, ocean blue eyes from mine, he shakes his head. “Nope.”

“Figures. Drunk me isn’t really much of a talker. To be honest, I’m kind of surprised I still have my pants on.”

Jai laughs, his warm, naked torso vibrating pleasantly against my side. “Firstly, drunk you usually can’t keep her mouth shut, and secondly, I’m not that kind of guy.”

I smile. I’m glad he’s not the kind of guy to take advantage of a woman’s vulnerability. Somehow, I managed to get stuck with the only decent person down here. In the world of demons, I ended up with a saint. What are the odds? I’ve never been the kind of person who believes in fate or destiny, but maybe this situation was meant to be…maybe my entire life has led to this moment—the moment I can make a difference in someone else’s life. Skull is what Jai wants…Skull’s demise will make Jai happy and give him the closure he needs. It’s only fair I help him. Helping him is the right thing to do.

A violent bout of anxiety forces my stomach to cramp, and saliva to surge into my mouth. Throwing my stomach lining up all over Jai would be horrific, but it’ll happen if he doesn’t move now.

“I’m gonna puke,” I groan, clenching my tummy.

By some stroke of luck, he doesn’t assume I’m messing around and lifts his leg. My nausea takes the back seat as blood rushes down the length of my leg, sending the tingles into a frenzy. Jai watches in amusement as I struggle to straighten my leg and wriggle my toes.

“You weren’t kidding,” he states, amusement lacing his tone.

“Nope.” I rub my calf, peering over my shoulder. “Christ, your leg is heavy.”

He smiles proudly. “Never skipped a leg day.”

I open my mouth to speak and the contents in my stomach jolt up my throat. I clamp my hand over my mouth as the acid burns my esophagus and spills over my tongue. Jolting upright, Jai reaches out for me.

“Shit. You okay?”

I dive off the cot, numb leg be damned, and tear from our little nook. I make it halfway to the toilet area before I hunch over and gag up the rest of the bile in my stomach. As it spills onto the concrete below my feet, I smell it and it makes me feel worse. My fingernails dig into the concrete as my head spins and I try to steady myself. What’s worse than vomiting into your own mouth? Falling into a puddle of it head first. When my stomach is well and truly empty, I swipe my arm over my mouth and straighten my spine.

“Easy on the booze, kid.”

I glance up in time to see a stranger, at least forty years old, tuck a magazine under his arm as he heads back from the toilet. Kid? I’m a grown ass woman and what does he know anyway? I bet if he had to deal with half of the shit I do, he’d throw himself over the railing.

“Thanks for the tip, Pops.” I deadpan, leaning tiredly against the wall.

He laughs a full belly laugh and saunters off, leaving me towering over my own vomit. Ah, this morning sucks. I run my fingers through my hair. Now my mouth tastes like regurgitated ass and there’s nothing I can do about it. I blow air out of my cheeks.

Awesome.

***

After I threw up, I managed to drag my sorry ass back to my room...which brings me to now. I hate his fresh skin and his alert eyes. I hate how pert he looks versus how abysmal I feel. I also want to punch the playful smirk right off his lips, but that would require energy. Energy I don’t have.

“Better?” He asks.

Wait for it. I’m sure he has something smart to say. He sits on the edge of the bed with his elbows resting on his knees. A new course of nausea rears its head, but it’s not half as extreme as the last, so managing it’s easy.

“Not even close,” I grumble, lowering myself onto my screeching cot.

Normally, I take caution when I climb into bed in fear of the thick, green mesh ripping open. Not today. I have zero control over my muscles. They’re heavy and slow. In other words, screw the mesh. I’ll worry about falling on my ass when I don’t feel like death.

I throw my arm over my face and close my eyes. I don’t want to deal with the world today.

“What would make you feel better?”

I don’t look out from under my arm when I say: “A bullet in the skull. Unless you can put me out of my misery, I doubt there’s much else you can do for me.”

“Don’t be so sure.”

“What the—” I flinch as a heavy item hits me in the stomach. With a groan, I pull my arm from my face and look down at the object he’s tossed at me. Whatever it is, it’s inside a long, white sock. I look at him, my nose scrunched.

He smiles, excitement dancing in his eyes and over his features. “The sock is clean. Promise.” He flicks his head. “Open it.”

“It’s not a collection of fingers you’ve taken from people who’ve looked at me funny, is it?”

Jai’s never said it, but I’ve noticed it. He has a tendency of getting a little...jealous. And that’s not his only issue. He’s also fiercely protective. Most of the time I chalk it up to the guilt he feels for getting me trapped down here with him. Other times, I can’t help but feel like there’s more to it.

He rolls his eyes. “I keep those in my other sock.”

I chuckle and open the sock. Inside are two small, purple bottles of shampoo and conditioner, a toothbrush and toothpaste. My girly heart leaps in excitement, but I don’t let it seep onto my face.

“How’d you get these?”

He smirks up at me as he ties his laces. “I know a guy. Enjoy them because they weren’t cheap.”

He paid for them? Why would he do that? I know you’re not supposed to ask the price of gifts because it’s rude, but surely that etiquette doesn’t apply down here.

“How much did it cost you?”

He doesn’t answer right away. Instead, he finishes looping his laces around his finger and pulling them into a tight bow. Then, his eyes find mine. “Does it matter?”

I shake my head. “No, I guess not.”

I’m just curious. Shampoo and conditioner isn’t exactly something you can get down here and if he has someone who can get in and out, I assume it doesn’t come cheap.

Jai sighs and pushes off of the bed, straightening his white tee. “For your curiosity, Kitten, it cost two thousand dollars.”

TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS? FOR TOILETRIES?! I gape at him. “Two thousand? It better be made of diamonds for that price.”

He grins. “Nope. No diamonds, sorry to disappoint.”

“Why?” I ask him. “Why would you do this for me?”

Jai ponders my question for a few small eternities. “It’s a peace offering. An apology for treating you like a child.”

My lips twitch at the corners. It’s not every day you hear someone admit their wrong doings and I admire him for it. “Apology accepted.”

Two thousand dollars...I can’t believe it. I’d feel bad even if he spent five dollars, but two thousand? There are no words. Instead of thanking him, I sit up and grab the nine thousand, nine hundred dollars from underneath the dirty shirt I stashed it under yesterday.

“It’s nice to know you’re keeping the money in a safe place,” Jai comments, but I ignore him.

I hold out the money. “This is yours.”

He shakes his head as he folds his arms tightly over his chest. “No, it’s not.”

With a sigh, I toss him the money and he catches it before it hits the floor. “Emi—”

“No.” I shake my head. “You brought that money here for a reason. You need it. I came with nothing, so whether I have it or not doesn’t make a difference to me.”

I climb off the bed and grab a new shirt from the bag beside my bed. “You keep that and whatever I make from here on I’ll keep for myself. Sound fair?”

His cobalt irises burn through me, but they fail to intimidate. My whole life I’ve fought for myself. All the money I’ve made, however little, is money I’ve made on my own. No handouts. Being way out of my comfort zone doesn’t change anything. I help myself. I always have.

With a defeated exhale, Jai stuffs the money into his pocket. “Sounds fair.”

Flinging the shirt over my shoulder, I tuck the sock full of goodies underneath my arm and step around Jai.

Oh! Before I go, “What’d you need the ten grand for anyway?”

He turns around, a curious expression lighting his features. “I thought you wanted nothing to do with my plan?”

I shrug, toying nervously with the hem of my shirt. “Paint me curious.”

“If you insist.” He glances over my shoulder before leaning closer, lowering his voice. “I setup a payment with one of Skull’s goons. I give him ten grand and he answers one simple question.”

“What question is that?”

Jai swallows and this time he’s unable to hide the pain flashing through his eyes. “Whether or not my brother is alive.”

Oh… “Sorry I ruined that for you.”

He offers me a tight smile. “It doesn’t matter. I don’t think he was going to tell me anyway. Skull’s people can’t be trusted. Spending the money on you instead, probably saved my life.”

An awkward silence fills the room. I guess we’ll never know what might’ve happened if I’d never followed him from the train.

“Do you have a new plan?” I ask. “What are you going to do now?”

It usually takes a lot to scare me—and words never have—but the next five that fall from Jai’s lips terrify me beyond anything I’ve ever felt. His stare drops to the small skull tattoo on my collarbone—the one that matches his—and he says.

“Now I have you, Kitten.”

Anxiety

Jai

Her face says it all. For the briefest moment blatant fear etches its way across her features and the air surrounding us turns stale—even more than it already is. It’s no secret that Skull scares the shit out of Emily, and maybe it’s not the smartest idea putting someone as easily scared as her in Skull’s path. I wish it was someone else, but it’s not. She’s the only one who can help. She’s in the ideal position to help me get information about my brother. At the same time, however, I gotta watch what I tell her about my plan until I’m certain she can be trusted. Skull might know the details of everyone down here, but he doesn’t know my plan—my intent—and I can’t afford for him to learn it before I’m ready.

“I’m not capable of much...I can’t go up against Skull, Jai.”

The worry that cradles my name as she says it twists my stomach. I don’t want to ask such a dangerous thing of her—of anybody. This is my plan, my problem, but unfortunately, it hasn’t exactly panned out the way I originally intended it to. As much as it kills me to say it, I’m stuck, and it’s driving me mad. I swear I’m a few days away from doing the world a favor by shooting Skull in the face as he leans over his usual railing above the cage...but then I’d never learn the whereabouts of Joel. And I need him. Whatever is left of our family needs him.

“All I need is Skull to tell you where my brother is. That’s all. If you can get that out of him without arousing suspicion, you’re done. I’ll get you out of here.”

Sad slopes curve her eyebrows and slant her eyes. I frown as the sadness dulls her skin and reaches her lips. “I know you want your brother to be alive and well, but what if he—”

“Don’t even say it. He’s not dead, Emily. I know it.”

She purses her sweet, pink lips and nods. Sympathy. I fucking hate it. Joel isn’t dead. He can’t be dead. There’s just no way. I refuse to let Skull take two siblings from me. First, my sister and now my brother? No. A sharp pain in my chest almost cripples me and Emily notices as my shoulders drop an inch. She reaches out to me, her palms exposed.

“Jai? Are you alright?”

My ribcage tightens, compressing my lungs and making it difficult to breathe. What the fuck is happening? The sharp lines of my world blur, churning my stomach along with it. As I take a step back, Emily takes a step forward. She’s cornering me, caging me. She’s breathing in all of the air! Using it up!

“Jai?”

My back hits the wall and I clench my chest as I slump against it. Everything is small and getting smaller. I can’t do this. I can’t do anything!

“You’re having a panic attack,” she says in a sweet reassuring tone, her thin arms still outstretched. “I need you to calm your breathing. Everything is okay.”

I don’t need talking and I don’t need reassurance. I need space. I need to be alone. I don’t want her to see me like this.

“Go!” I snap and she jumps back.

“No. Not when you need hel—”

I grit my teeth, letting the next few words grind out. “I don’t need your help. I don’t need anyone’s help!”

I don’t have time to let her flinch send me on a guilt trip. Instead, I slide down the wall, the concrete lifting my shirt and digging into my skin. It cuts me, but I feel no pain. Only release.

Only peace.

By the time my ass connects with the floor, she’s gone and I’m all alone.

Story of my fucking life.

Bending my legs, I drop my head onto my knees. I wondered when the stress of it all was going to catch up with me. I’ve noticed bits of me cracking lately—yesterday my anger with Emily and now this? What’s next?

They weren’t kidding when they said revenge is cancerous. It’s wearing me down by the minute and I know it’s not healthy, but I can’t let this go. I can’t let him go. I need Joel because I can’t do it anymore. I can’t.

Two years ago I set upon my road to revenge when Joel disappeared and left me to look after Jessica, our sixteen year old sister. Growing up, home life was perfect. We were a real family, a family who loved each other and looked out for each other. Then, one night, it all fell to shit. Jacqueline, my eldest sister, was never a ‘right side of the tracks kind of girl’. She lived fast, but partied harder, and it all caught up with her eventually.

There was an abandoned complex on the other side of the town we grew up in. It was a known spot for raves and parties, and most of them were allowed to rage through the night if you paid the officials the right amount of cash. The majority of the families in our town were loaded, so the ‘right’ amount of cash was always exactly that.

Right.

Jacqueline was a known party girl. She knew which booze was best, which cigarettes were the smoothest and which drugs made you feel invincible for the longest. She also knew calculus as well as ancient history, and could win any debate you engaged her in...but those things never won over a good time, and that’s all Jacqueline wanted.

Once she hit twenty-one, my parents gave up on her. They stopped lecturing her and started ignoring her instead. They still loved her whole-heartedly, but they were just tired of it. They wanted her to learn for herself and she didn’t mind it; in fact, she preferred it.

I still remember the night it all turned to shit. I was sixteen and lying on the living room floor watching a re-run of Dragon Ball Z after spending the afternoon at my kick boxing class. Goku was in the middle of a Kamehameha when Mom got the phone call.

Her breath hitched. That’s what caught my attention. I rolled onto my stomach and watched her. Her face, usually smooth and youthful, was contorted into a look of horror that penetrated me right to my intestines. Her usual wavy black hair suddenly seemed flatter and the vibrant blue in her eyes darkened as they became wet with tears.

“I don’t understand.”

Her eyes were on me, but she wasn’t looking at me.

“Overdose?” The tears spilled. “Are you sure it’s my Jackie?”

A second later she dropped the phone. The handset crashed to the floor and she screeched for my father to grab the car keys. Joel appeared first, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

“Stop screaming, Ma. You didn’t miss this month’s issue of Cosmo. I saw it on the shelves when I went to the gas station this morning.”

Mom turned to Joel, her long, blue skirt swishing around her feet.

When he saw her puffy eyes and messy hair, his demeanor changed from tired to alert. “Mom?”

“I need you to watch Jai and Jessica.”

Towering over her, he reached out and gripped her shoulders. I watched, confused, as Mom’s tiny frame trembled. She spoke in a low tone, a tone I couldn’t hear over Goku’s ‘powering up’ sound effects, and it wasn’t until I saw Joel’s heartbreak in his dark, chocolate eyes that I realized something was horribly wrong.

“What is it?” Dad asked as he slipped into the room, keys in hand. He straightened his tan sweater, adjusting the collar until it sat flush against the back of his neck.

Mom pulled away from Joel who’d dropped his stare to the floor. There was a vacant look on his face and I didn’t like it. Not at all.

“It’s Jacqueline.” She managed to squeeze out before sobs overwhelmed her. “She’s in hospital.”

Everything was a blur after that. I remember Joel cooking Macaroni Cheese dinners for me and Jessica, who was only eleven at the time. I remember him trying desperately to be positive, doing everything with a forced smile, but it didn’t matter because I could feel his distress. It was eleven p.m. when the phone rang again. Jessica was fast asleep, but Joel and I sat in the lounge, watching a movie without actually watching a movie. He answered quickly, his fist clenched at his side. “Hello?”

His brows were furrowed as he listened intently. When they curved out and his bottom lip began to tremble, I knew it wasn’t the phone call he was expecting—that I was praying for. He didn’t speak. For five long, torturous minutes he didn’t make a sound. When he finally did, he exploded. I jumped out of my seat, my heart slamming into my chest as he leaped from his chair and tore the phone out of its socket. The armchair he was sitting on was next to go. I hid against the wall by the bookcase as he smashed frames, broke ornaments and tore books in half. Tears welled in my eyes and I didn’t know what to do. So I watched. And it was fucking painful. I always looked up to my brother. He was my idol; the strongest man I knew, and there he was, breaking in front of me. I didn’t think it was possible, but it seems even the strongest people can break like glass.

When the living room was in shambles and Joel was a still mass in the center of it all, I finally asked; “What is it?”

“Jacqueline’s...dead.” He simply said.

I swallowed hard, suppressing the sharp pain in my chest.

“And Mom and Dad—” his voice broke and my lips began to tremble. “Mom and Dad crashed their car on the way there. They—”

Joel sobbed, cradling his head in his hands. My heart bled, my lungs tightened. Tears began to wet my cheeks one after the other as my knees buckled. I could feel my world deteriorating by the second, and I didn’t know how to stop it.

At some point, my ass hit the floor and Joel finally lifted his head. His eyes were red rimmed and puffy, much like mine. It didn’t matter if he finished what he wanted to say or not. I knew the answer. I was already crying.

“None of them made it, Jai. It’s just us three.”

And it was.

Since Joel was old enough, he took care of my younger sister and me. For years he stepped in as our care-giver and didn’t complain. Not even once. I admired my older brother long before the events that claimed the lives of three of my family members, but the day he stepped up and put his life on hold for Jessica and me...well, there are no words. He wasn’t always happy, however. I could see it in the way his stare drowned in his black coffee every morning. You see, he had an unhealthy obsession with tracking down whoever had sold Jacqueline the drugs. It ate him up, consumed him from the inside out. For ten months he launched his own investigation into Jacqueline’s death and had, eventually, tracked down the dealer. Later, Joel told me the man who’d given Jacqueline the drugs was extremely hard to find. Everyone had refused to talk about him. They were too terrified to drop his name, but that didn’t stop Joel. After asking the right questions and following the right leads, he had found the dealer; and when he found the dealer, his course of action had changed. He’d begun with hours and hours of computer research, followed by mixed martial arts classes. Whenever he wasn’t training he was eating and sleeping. In a few short months he’d transformed himself completely. His slightly doughy frame had become lean, cut and fucking terrifying. It was inspiring.

By the time Joel disappeared, I was out of high school and was able to look after Jessica on my own. For two years I was her parental figure. For two torturous years I dealt with her, while she blamed me for everything, but that’s not what drove me to the edge of insanity. She started staying out late, partying, drinking—following the shady path Jacqueline did. I was losing my mind and I needed help. I needed Joel’s help. So, one fateful night, I broke into his files and found all of his research—discovered his obsession with a man named ‘Skull’. According to Joel, Skull was responsible for Jacqueline’s death. He gave her the drug that ended it all. It was a ‘trial’ on a new drug he was working on. The drug was laced with a million and one different chemicals—chemicals I couldn’t even begin to pronounce. Combined, it was too much for her small body and it killed her.

Once he had a name, there was no stopping Joel. He wanted to kill Skull, and the only way to do that was to join his little underground club. Of course, not just anybody could show up. He had to climb the ranks in the underground circuit to gain attention. Once he achieved that, Skull invited him to his secret underground ring and that was it. Once you’re in. You’re in.

For two years I trained. For two years I fought my ass off, and looked after my younger sister. I won’t let it be for nothing.

Now I’m here.

Now Joel’s obsession is my obsession.

And nothing will deter me from my goal.

Invasion

Emily

I drag my feet, not wanting to get back to the room too quickly. I clench the sock filled with goodies in my hand while running my tongue over smooth, minty teeth. The toothpaste couldn’t have come at a better time.

I keep my head down, allowing my wet hair to hang in my face and I inhale it. I don’t know what kind of scent ‘for long, oily hair’ is, but it smells amazing. A small smile tugs at the corners of my lips as the fresh smell inflates my lungs. It was awfully nice of Jai to buy me toiletries, but I can’t help but wonder what persuaded him to do it. He said it was a peace offering, but I’m not so sure. I shake my head. I could be reading too much into it. Either he likes me, or my smell was becoming too overbearing for our little nook.

I glance up and push my hair out of my face. Seven feet ahead of me is the entrance to my room. My stomach drops and I slow even more.

Guilt?

Yep.

I’m pretty sure that heavy, sick-inducing feeling in my tummy is guilt. Why couldn’t I’ve kept my mouth shut? Why’d I have to insinuate his brother is dead? His brother, Joel, obviously means a lot to him. He can’t bear the thought of his death. It’s interesting to witness. I’ve never been that attached to anyone. I don’t know what love for a sibling feels like. It’s always been me. Just me.

Alone.

I suck in the warm, stale air then exhale it. What if he doesn’t want me back yet? What if he’s not ready to talk? The least I can do is offer an ear, and if he doesn’t want it, then he doesn’t want it. Simple. I’d be a shitty friend if I pretend his breakdown didn’t happen at all.

I peer around the cracked, blackened concrete of the entrance. When I see him sitting against the wall, his head on his knees, shielded by his arms I almost pull back and turn around. Even at his most vulnerable he’s intimidating.

“Hey.” The word tumbles from my mouth before my brain has a chance to think it.

It’s too late to back down now.

He doesn’t look up. He doesn’t say a word. With a sigh, I dump the sock on the bed and sit down beside him. My brain still throbs in my skull and my stomach continues to churn, but I ignore it. I don’t know how long we sit in silence for. Countless people walk by, judging and whispering, but Jai doesn’t budge. Like stone, he remains still.

“Sorry.” He murmurs after a small while passes.

I pull my knees into my chest and rest the side of my head on my knees. “Sorry? What for?”

“For freaking out.” He turns his head so I can see his face.

His eyes aren’t red and his skin isn’t blotchy. He’s the perfect picture of calm. When I cry, it takes hours for my puffiness to go away. I wonder if Jai even cries at all.

“I’ve never...I’m not...I don’t usually...”

“It’s okay,” I tell him, my lips twitching. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

Relief lights his eyes, right before they plummet back into darkness. He shakes his head. “No, I do. We’re in this together, right?”

Are we? If we weren’t ten seconds ago, we definitely are now. “Right.”

Jai inhales and blows the air out of his cheeks. “Skull is responsible for the death of Jacqueline, my older sister.”

I frown. “Jacqueline? Wait. I thought this whole thing is about Joel?”

He nods, raking his fingers through his hair. “It is, but it begins with Jacqueline.”

And it does. He starts at the beginning, with Jacqueline, and finishes with him and his little sister, Jessica. He doesn’t make eye contact as he explains the details that forced him down here, but our eyes don’t have to meet for me to see his pain. It’s on his face, in the way his eyebrows draw together and his teeth grit. It’s in the way his fists clench and unclench, the way his voice changes in pitch. He’s hurting, and he has been for a very long time.

“I had no idea...” I whisper when he’s finished.

No wonder he’s so hung up on Skull. Though he didn’t force Jai’s sister to take the drug, he had offered it, and it resulted in not only the death of his sister, but it created the events that led to his parent’s car accident, and Joel leaving them to enact his revenge.

Jai’s lost so much. His sister, his parents, his brother...I guess, in the grand scheme of things, I’m lucky I have no one. I can’t hurt over something I’ve never had.

He lifts his stare to mine, slightly angling his face. I don’t realize how close I’m leaning toward him until then. His blue irises flick over my face.

“How was your shower?”

“You tell me.” I lean in, pulling my hair to the side and offering him my neck. “Do I still smell like a Russian cab?”

I don’t remember much about last night, but the Russian cab line I do remember. I’d have taken offense, too, if he wasn’t so right. In the next heartbeat, his warm breath skitters over the surface of my throat, freezing me in place and sending shivers vibrating down my spine. He inhales and a long, painful second later, he pulls back an inch, but the inch isn’t enough space. My heart still pumps painfully in my chest.

I swallow. “Well?”

His gaze drops to my lips and lightning shoots up my veins. I’m spellbound by the way his pupils have darkened, and the way he’s staring at me. If he doesn’t kiss me to ease the tension building inside me I will implode.

“You smell good.”

A sentence like that shouldn’t sound as good as it does. His words are music to my ears and crack to my hormones. It’s no secret I’m sexually attracted to Jai. What woman wouldn’t be? He’s six or so feet of thick muscle with calming ocean blue eyes, and a head of soft, jet black hair. He’s fresh from the front page of a men’s fitness magazine—the kind of good-looking reserved only for celebrities.

“I should hope so. It’d be an extreme waste of your money otherwise.”

A beautiful smile cracks his lips, but he doesn’t distance them from mine. I like it when he smiles. I like it more when he kisses me.

“Also, that’s a creepy thing to say,” I lie, my voice unconvincingly low.

His smile deepens, flashing his white teeth. “Says little Miss Stare-at-you-while-you’re-sleeping.”

I laugh and I’m shocked it’s a genuine laugh. In total, I’ve probably only heard it three or four times throughout my life. It sounds completely different in comparison to my fake laugh. It feels different too. Who knew laughing could be so therapeutic?

Jai lets his head rest against the uneven wall, taking my hopes for a kiss with him. “You’re not so bad, you know.”

I scoff. “Not so bad? Gee thanks.”

He nudges me with his shoulder. “I’m not talking about your looks. You’re beautiful, obviously. You don’t need me to tell you that. I’m referring to your personality. I thought it was going to suck being stuck down here with you—especially when you started crying the first few minutes in—but it turned out okay. I like having you around.”

I smile and glance at my hands as I nervously thread my fingers together. “Thanks. Though I do wonder if we’d be friends if we had met under different circumstances…”

He laughs once. “Not a chance.”

I look at him. “Why?”

Jai looks me dead in the eyes, his face serious. “Because I’m not friends with women I’m attracted to. It creates too many problems.”

I open my mouth to ask him what exactly he finds attractive about me, but a distinct clear of a throat stops me. It’s probably a good thing. I’d only deny everything he said anyway. I’m a girl. It’s what we do.

When I look up, I regret feeling relieved for the intrusion. My heart skips a beat. My smile drops from my face. It’s one of Skull’s men, looking smug as he dips his hands into the pockets of his pressed black slacks.

“Busy?” he asks, though I know it’s not a question.

Beside me Jai tenses, his hatred billowing off him in fretful waves. I shake my head.

“Good. Skull wants to see you.”

***

I hate it. Everything. I hate the feel of the concrete beneath my feet as I stand outside Skull’s little service door. I hate the way my heart slams into my ribcage in fear of a single man, and I hate that I know everything he did to Jai and his family. Ignorance was bliss…but now I can’t detach myself. I can’t ignore it. Come hell or high water, Skull won’t receive my help. By the end of round two, what will it matter? He’ll see I’m a fake. Then I’m dead anyway.

The brute adjusts his emerald green tie and pushes open the door. I pause for a moment and suck in a deep breath. I can do this. I break my plan down into dot points that my scared brain can understand. Just smile and nod. Agree to anything he wants you to do. Lie through your teeth. Get back to Jai.

The air I inhale is forcefully expelled as the brute shoves me in my back and through the door. I stumble in and only just manage to regain my footing before I fall flat on my face. Anger, white and hot, ignites in my veins. I grit my teeth and whip around to face the ass with the heavy hands. He stares down at me with a smug grin on his scarred lips. Oh, if could just crush his bald effing head with my bare hands I’d—

“Easy, Kitty-Cat.”

I freeze. Then shudder. Straightening my posture and brushing off my jeans, I turn around. The lighting sucks, but I still see him sitting at a small, round dining table looking all high and mighty. He offers me a sinister grin and so does the black skull inked onto his face.

“Feeling feisty today, Kitten?”

“That’s not my na—” A heavy hand slaps me on the back of the head and I almost bite my tongue. I might as well give up correcting people. Oh, Jesus. I’m going to die as ‘Kitten No-name’ instead of Emily Sheppard. Where’s the dignity in that?

Slowly, I glance over my shoulder, ignoring the headache that brews in the nape of my neck. If I were bigger and not trapped underground, I’d kick this asshole hard in the nuts.

“You must feel so strong,” I sneer, “hitting a woman.”

He bares his teeth and lifts a second monstrously large hand, exposing the back of his palm. I tense, bracing my poor face.

“Jim, go find something to do, will you? Kitten and I have some catching up to do.”

I flash him a smug smile before looking back to Skull. I really hope I don’t run into Jim alone. That would not end well.

Skull waits patiently for Jim to leave the room, his hands resting on the table on either side of his plate. The smells from it hit me then. Sausage. Egg. Buttered toast. My mouth waters. I haven’t had anything but stale bread and broth for a while now. What I wouldn’t give for a hot meal and ice cold water. Hell, I’d even settle for clean water at the very least.

“Hungry?” he asks, still beaming.

I shake my head and lie. “No.”

I imagine the butter on the toast melting over my tongue. It’d be delicious, perfect, euphoric, but not worth the weight Skull would undoubtedly hold over my head. When I get out of here—if I get out of here—Jai owes me breakfast.

Beside him, Skull kicks out the wooden chair, and its metal legs skid out with a howl against the concrete.

“Sit.”

I don’t hesitate. Gripping the edges of the wood, I pull it under my ass and shuffle forward, until my legs are underneath the table.

He picks up his knife and fork, and holds them over his plate, resting his elbows on the table. A thick, gold watch peeks out from the sleeve of his black, leather jacket and I glance at its face. Eleven a.m. What I wouldn’t give to feel the morning sun on my skin again.

“My boys tell me you and Jai Stone aren’t on good terms.” He pushes egg onto his slice of toast and cuts through it with ease.

“We weren’t.”

“Weren’t?” He jabs his fork through the food and lifts it to his mouth.

I try not to watch as he opens his mouth and fills it with delicious breakfast foods, but it’s impossible. To see the skull on his face moving the way it does...is creepy.

“We had a falling out. We’re fine now.”

“Good. I’d hate for a silly little quarrel to ruin our…agreement.”

My collarbone burns and I swallow hard. “Agreement?”

Skull moves quickly and I flinch as a loud thump accompanied by the jostling of cutlery and porcelain burst through the air. I feel it then...the cold metal against the inside of my thumb. I peer down at my hand rested casually on the table. Sure enough, Skull’s fork is buried deep in the wood. Well...shit.

“Don’t play dumb with me.” He growls, his Australian accent coming in thick. “I don’t have the fucking patience. If you value your thumb, you’ll get smart. And quick.”

“Oh, that agreement.” I lick my dry lips. “Y-yes, I remember.”

“You do?” He glances at his fork and then back at me. “Funny that.”

Skull frees his fork from the wood and I immediately pull my hands into my lap. “I don’t know what you want me to be looking out for. Jai seems like everyone else down here.”

He stabs into a small piece of sausage and stuffs it into his mouth. “But he’s not.”

I play dumb. “What do you mean?”

“Jai Stone is related to Joel Stone.”

That makes him suspicious? I stare, waiting for him to go on. Just tell me Joel is alive, damn it!!

“And?”

He smirks, the teeth tattooed on his lip curving smugly. “I’m not sure I trust you yet, Kitten.”

“How do I prove that I can be trusted?”

I need this. I need to know if Joel is alive. If I can give Jai that piece of information, that peace of mind, then I won’t feel so bad when I bail on him.

Skull leans back in his chair and chews slowly, contemplating what I can do to prove I can be trusted. I really hope it’s not another tattoo. I don’t think I can stomach it.

“Tell me your deepest, darkest secret.”

I frown. I don’t have secrets. I’ve never done anything worth hiding and besides, who am I going to hide it from anyway? I don’t know anybody well enough to care what they think of me. Wait! There is one thing I’m hiding, but if I tell him, it might get me killed. Then how helpful am I? It can go both ways…

Screw it. “I’m not supposed to be here.”

Skull arches a tattooed brow. “I called you in here.”

“No, not here, as in this room. I mean here...underground.”

He angles his head.

“I was on the train coming home from work…Jai was on the train too. When we got off, he bumped into me and smashed my tablet. I followed him and, unaware of me, he led me here. To save my life, he paid the entry fee.”

He analyzes my face and I try not to squirm as his dark, black eyes scan over my arms and across my chest. An eternity later, he drops his cutlery and shakes his head. “How’d I not realize that? He said he was coming alone.”

“It’s not his fault. I—”

He zips from his seat and smashes into me. His body is heavy and hard, and I yelp as he knocks me from my chair and we crash to the floor. His hand wraps tightly around my throat as crushes me to the dirty concrete and I squirm, desperate to break free.

“You fucking snake.” He spits. “You’re not even supposed to be here.”

I squeeze my eyes shut, terrified of the skull inches from my face. Now I see why he has it. Now I feel the true terror of the tattoo.

“But I am,” I wheeze, my lungs burning. “I’m here. I can help you.”

“Why would you help me?” He demands. “You’re not one of us. You can’t be fucking trusted.”

I can’t be trusted, I know that, but I need to make him believe I can.

“I told you my deepest, darkest secret knowing it could get Jai and me killed,” I squeeze out, opening my eyes. “He’s a stranger to me. I don’t care if he lives or dies. You can trust me.”

Fuzzy dots dance in front of my eyes. Normally, I’d panic, but they block out portions of his terrifying ink and I prefer it. I wonder if he’d kill me if I told him I know the brotherhood is just a front, that it’s really about him finding new muscle. Probably.

He eyes me closely. “I should kill you and hang you over the railing. No one would miss you. You have no friends, no family. Killing you wouldn’t make a blip on anyone’s radar.”

“You could kill me.” I wheeze. His fingers twitch around my throat and I regret ever opening my big mouth. “But then you’d have no one to find out Jai’s agenda—assuming he has one.”

Skull grits his teeth. “I have my own people. People I can trust.”

“He’d never talk to your people. If you’re suspicious about him, you need me.” I gasp, desperate to suck down air. “He trusts me.”

“And why should I trust you?”

His grip lessens in pressure as he gives me a little room to talk.

“Because I have a price. I’m not a fighter or a criminal. I want nothing to do with you and your business.”

Skull angles his head and it’s terrifying. Everything is terrifying. “What do you want?”

“Money and a one way plane ticket.”

His black lips contort into a wry smile, sending a shard of ice through my veins. “Look at you trying to strike a deal with a crime lord. Maybe the kitten really is a lion after all.”

I’m not a lion, hell, I’m barely a kitten. What I am is a scared, puny mouse using the shadows to my advantage. I don’t want to make a deal with Skull. I just want to talk my way out of death right now. We all know how bad guys come through with their deals when it’s over—a friendly smile and a bullet in the back of the head. Skull has nothing to offer me.

“I’ll tell you what.” He brings his face even closer to mine, enough for our bottom lips to graze. “You find out what Jai’s intentions are, and I’ll pardon you from round two.”

“You can do that?”

He nods. “I can do anything.”

His lips claim mine, his fingers clamping down on my throat once more. I remain perfectly still to conserve the last bit of air in my lungs. His wet tongue forces its way between my lips and when it slips into my mouth I want to bite down on it, punishing him for his intrusion. But I don’t...because I’m quite attached to my tongue. I squeeze my eyes shut, not wanting this god awful moment to scar me for life. To think there are women out there who’ve wanted to be with this man. It makes me sick.

When he’s finished exploring every inch of my mouth, he pulls back, lessening his grip on my throat. His dark eyes meet mine, the beginnings of a smirk twitching at his lips. He’s proven his point. He can do anything, and no one can stop him. I get it.

“Was it everything you hoped it would be?” I deadpan, swallowing to moisten my painfully dry throat.

Skull laughs, his chest rumbling against mine, as he pushes off of me and climbs to his feet. He extends his tattooed hand and I hesitate for a second before slipping my hand into his.

“I like you, Emily,” he states, pulling me to my feet. “I really hope I don’t have to kill you.”

I dust off my jeans.

“Me neither.”

Red

Jai

“What about you, handsome?”

The gentle, seductive tone in her voice draws me back to the conversation.

“What about me?” I ask, dragging my eyes unwillingly from the entrance of the bar to the red-head beside me.

Graham, a mature man I met at the bar thirty minutes ago, has switched out of the conversation, focusing more on the busty blonde beside him, who, in my opinion, is trying way too hard to garner his affections. That’s the thing about the women down here. Their sincerity is questionable. They’re always scheming, always trying to work out the fastest way to the top. Those who don’t care about the top want extra protection. God knows why. Most of them can hold their own.

She glances toward the door. “Expecting someone?”

I shrug as I pull my tin cup to my lips and down a mouthful of whiskey. “Maybe.”

I don’t usually drink early in morning—if at all—but I’m on edge. More on edge than usual. Emily has been gone a while and I don’t know what she’s doing or what he’s doing to her. I grit my teeth as the strong, ‘homemade’ liquid of my second mouthful rolls down my throat.

When I chose to sit with Graham after our amusing small talk, he was alone. Then this pair showed up, which persuaded me to drink more. I regret coming to the bar, but there’s no way I could handle waiting around our room. I’d go mad.

“Well, in the meantime, you can humor me at least.”

Exhaling, I lower my cup and she slips closer, her pink lips curling victoriously. “What about you? What do you do for work?”

“I do automotive repairs—painting, mostly.” A lie. “What about you, Graham?” I ask, steering the conversation away from me.

He turns his head. “Hmm? Oh, waste management.”

I simper. Waste management. How original—also untrue. The tattoo of a raging bull skull on the side of his neck signifies his ties to the Twisted Sons, a notorious New York motorcycle gang. His real occupation ties in with ‘warehousing’, ‘tattoos’ and ‘motorcycles’, or, in other words, weapons, drugs and laundering. I’m sure if anyone dug deep enough they could probably tie him to racketeering, murder and rape too. But I’m not here to judge. Not today. His luck will run out eventually.

Graham must need a little extra cash to pay off the Cartel. Last I heard, they were on the lookout for a couple Twisted boys who owe them a lot of money. I know Graham isn’t stupid enough to risk being down here with the likes of Skull who, very publicly, declared war on the Twisted Sons. Unless he was desperate.

Stupid bastard.

Like most of them down here, he has no idea that this is a set-up for Skull to recruit more bodyguards; more men and women to do his dirty work. The second Skull gets a glimpse of his tattoo, he’s a goner. To be honest, I’m surprised Skull hasn’t seen it. Then again, there’s probably a lot he can’t see from up there on his fucking ledge. Whoever gathers Skull’s information is supposed to alert him to the fact that he has an enemy down here. After all, he does claim to know every single detail about anyone and everyone who enters his circle. All I know is, whoever gathered it is a dead man when Skull finds out Graham slipped by.

“I’m a physiotherapist on the outside.” The red head beside me purrs, subtly brushing her forearm against mine.

What’s her name again? Eva? Ivy? Fuck. I don’t know. As my brain rolls in my head, I run my hand over my face. Surely there’s a better way to kill time than drinking? I pause, then look to my left. Ivy, or Eva—who cares—might irritate the piss out of me, but at least she looks like a better way to kill the time. Her irises flare when we make eye contact, as if she heard my thoughts. Pulling at the crystal dove pendant on her gold necklace, she offers me a knowing smile; a smile that doesn’t quite hit the spot it should in order for me to want to take it any further than the bar. Besides, getting messed up with Red means I’ll have two girls running around the place completely and utterly obsessed with me, and I just don’t have the time. I smile at the thought. Kitten will bust my balls if she ever hears that.

As I think her name, she comes tearing through the bar, her big, pretty eyes wide and worried. The right leg of her jeans is slightly torn and her white tank top is smeared in patches of dirt. I’m off my crate and closing the distance between us in a fraction of a second.

“Kitten, are you—”

She snatches the tin cup from my hand and downs the last large mouthful of whiskey. Squeezing her eyes shut, she swallows it, baring her teeth. “Ugh. That was a bad idea.”

“It’s shit whiskey. You’re hungover. Of course it’s a bad idea.”

Emily swipes the back of her hand over her mouth. “Why are you drinking anyway? It’s barely mid-afternoon.”

Plucking my empty cup from her fingers, I frown at her. “You’re the last person in the world who should comment on the drinking habits of others, Little-Miss-Blew-A-Hundred-Dollars-On-Vodka.”

She rolls her eyes and flicks her hand at me before peering around my body. “Who are your friends?”

I don’t look over my shoulder. It doesn’t matter who they are. They’re not my friends. I don’t like any of them and if Red gets wind of Emily who knows what kind of shit storm that’ll create.

I grab Emily by the arm. “They’re nobody. Let’s get out of here.”

“Jai?” Red calls out.

Damn it. I clench my jaw and turn my body enough to see my ‘friends’. Red folds her arms tightly across her chest, impatiently waiting for me to return.

“Nobody, huh?” Kitten teases, her smile widening as she tugs her arm free.

I’m glad to see she’s enjoying this. Not. Defeated, I sigh and point them out one by one.

“The old man with his back to us is Graham. The blonde I don’t know and the red head is Ivy—or Eva.”

Emily arches a brow. “You don’t know?”

“I don’t care.”

I watch her face as her gaze scans over Red. Nothing crosses her features—not even the slightest hint of jealousy. If I’m being honest, it pisses me off. I just about lose my mind when a guy is staring her down like she’s dinner, but she barely sneers when a girl—a hot girl—calls my name? What the fuck?

“She’s pretty.”

I laugh. That, I wasn’t expecting. That, pisses me off even more. “Good, tell her that. Maybe she won’t kick your ass in round two.”

“Who’s to say I’ll be fighting her in round two?”

“You’re not exactly intimidating.”

“Right.” She glances down at her petite body. “Easy win and all that...”

Emily dusts her palms over the thighs of her jeans. I’m ninety-five percent sure they weren’t that dirty when she left this morning.

“What happened to you?” I ask, and what’s left of her already small smile, diminishes.

“Skull—”

“Jai! The next round on you?” I turn around, irritation flooding through me, as Graham twists in his seat.

When he sees Emily, his smile widens and he thrusts his empty cup in the air. “Kid!”

I glance at Emily who returns his smile and pushes by me. “Pops.”

I follow closely behind her. Graham is not someone I want Emily around. “Pops?”

“We met in the far tunnel earlier when she was throwing her guts up,” Graham answers as we approach the table.

I snicker, so does Emily.

“How charming,” Red deadpans, her brown eyes raking Emily over.

“Not my finest moment, I’ll admit. I’m Emily.”

Although Emily harbors no ill feelings or jealousy toward Red, I can see the feeling isn’t mutual. Red’s eyebrows are drawn in, accentuating the look of distaste in her eyes. The look on her face is the kind of look I expected Emily to show—I wanted Emily to show.

Where Red is fit and slightly masculine, Kitten is soft and feminine. Kitten has natural black hair as opposed to Ivy—or Eva’s—fake, red waves where her dark regrowth is visible, less than an inch off her scalp. Red is cosmetically beautiful, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but Emily is on the other end of the spectrum—a natural beauty. Her look is understated...delicate. While Red looks like the kind of girl who’d kick your ass if you dissed her, Emily looks fragile, like she’d burst into tears.

“I’m Ava. That’s Belle,” Red responds, her tone flat and unwelcoming.

Emily gives me a strange look, a look that says ‘you weren’t even close’ and I shrug. I was close enough.

“You gonna join us for the next round?” Graham asks, waving his empty cup.

Emily shakes her head, her skin paling. “God no. No more alcohol for me.”

“Then why are you here?”

“I was looking for Jai, but since he’s a little busy, I’ll talk to him later.”

Graham’s thick fingers snatch Emily’s wrist and he pulls her toward the table. Under his grip, her skin turns white from the pressure. It takes a lot of effort on my part not to snap his fingers. Fuck, I want to break his fingers.

“I’d watch how hard you pull her, Pops,” I warn him.

He pulls his hand back and raises it with the other, exposing the palms of his hands, surrendering apparently.

“Sorry.” He smirks. “Didn’t realize she was so important.”

Ignoring him, I bend low and pull a crate out from underneath the table. I kick it closer to my own crate and far enough from Graham. It’s not about importance. It’s about personal space and respect. I’m sure he meant nothing by it, but it doesn’t matter. He’s lucky he still has fingers.

Chuckling nervously, Emily hooks her shoe through the gap in the crate and tugs it closer to her, sitting exactly between Graham and I. Happy with Emily’s placement, Red tugs on the pocket of my pants and smiles.

Frowning at Emily, who’s doing an awesome job at avoiding eye contact with me, I lower myself onto my crate. The one right beside Ava.

From God knows where, Graham plucks a few bills and slaps them down on the table before sliding them toward Emily.

“Since you have plans to stay sober, we’ll have another round.”

She arches a brow at him. “Why am I getting the drinks?”

“…’Cause you won’t spill ‘em.”

“Fair enough.”

As she lifts herself up from her crate, I push mine back. I go to lift myself off my chair, but Red’s warm, slender fingers clamp down on my forearm. I glance down at her hand then at her face. What the hell?

“She’s a big girl. She doesn’t need help. Right, Emily?”

I look at Emily. Her dark eyes are zeroed in on the hand that’s so obviously claiming me and with a hard swallow, she nods.

“Right.”

We make eye contact and I have trouble reading her. Normally, she’s an open book, but in this moment she’s clouded. I see...curiosity, mostly, but there’s also something deeper, something...darker. Good. At least I’m getting something out of her.

Then, she turns and heads toward the bar.

***

I don’t know how many cups of whiskey I’ve downed in order to make this whole situation tolerable, but I hate it. I hate every second of it. Every time I get up to leave, Ava or Graham force me to stay, force me to have another drink. I hold my tongue and stay seated, but only for Kitten’s sake.

Ava wants me that much is obvious. God knows how many times I’ve felt her fingers dance up my inner thigh, and if I leave now, dragging Emily in tow, I’ll offend her. Then she’ll get bitter, and most likely hold a grudge. When that happens, Emily becomes a target; a target Ava will try to eliminate in the cage, and I can’t let that happen. So I play nice. I drink the alcohol, smile when required and occasionally flirt with Ava to sate her pathetic ego. It becomes a boring routine—sip, smile, compliment, sip, smile and laugh at a joke from time to time.

It’s maddening. Listening to story after story, joke after joke, about shit I don’t care about is doing my head in. I contemplate flipping the table and killing them all with a loose panel of wood to end the torture, but then Emily stands up—my saving fucking grace—and I waste no time leaping from my chair, forcing Ava’s hand from my thigh. I stumble into the table, spilling Graham’s drink. He curses at me, but my brain rolls at the same time, and his words go unheard.

Yay.

“Jesus, Jai. Drink much?” Kitten chastises, her warm hands wrapping around my bicep.

I blink a few times. When did I get so drunk?

“I should take him to lie down.” Ava offers, her voice sounding far behind me.

“No. He needs to sleep it off.” Emily responds in a clipped tone. “In his own bed.” She adds for good measure.

I can’t help a snort and she pinches my skin between her fingers, making me yelp. I smile, as I hunch and wrap my arm around her neck.

“You’re a good friend, making sure I don’t get molested in my vulnerable state.”

She peers up at me, her eyebrow cocked. I try to keep most of my weight off her body, but my feet keep doing this weird stumbling thing as we walk away and her small frame ends up taking the bulk of it.

“What are you even saying?”

“Ivy. She—”

“—Ava.”

“Eva. That’s what I said.”

Snorting and biting back a smile, Kitten wraps her warm around my waist and tries to haul me along.

“Her name,” she grunts as we exit the bar, “is Ava.”

“Oh. Right. Avy totally would have grinded up on this if I’d let her.”

“Grinded up on what?”

I point at my body. “This.”

She laughs. Hard. Underneath my arm her body shakes, and I like the way her eyes crinkle at the corners. Most of my weight comes back to me as her body weakens with laughter. Funny enough, I end up supporting her weight as she falls into a state of hysterics. It’s catching, the way her lips stretch and curve, exposing straight, white teeth. I find myself mimicking her, laughing until my stomach hurts. I haven’t laughed this hard in a long time.

“You are too much fun,” she sighs, her chest hiccupping with a remaining giggle. “You should try being funny more often. Less serious. It looks good on you.”

I can’t remember the last time I felt I could have fun...before Jacqueline died, maybe. From the moment I nicknamed Emily ‘Kitten’, that’s when I felt that spark again. The spark of excitement—of fun. I miss it. I miss the warmth of it all.

Emily angles her head, a curious smile curving her lips. “What?”

“Nothing,” I lie, shaking my head. I swallow and hold her close as the words I want to say go unsaid.

I really like you, Kitten.

Green

Emily

“You smell nice,” Jai mutters, smiling as I help him onto his cot.

By help, I mean I let go when I think he’s close enough. He falls backward onto his bed and it complains under his weight, leaving his legs to hang over the edge. I’d pick them up and help him move them to join the rest of his body on the cot, but I know exactly how heavy those bad boys are, and his comfort isn’t worth my spine. A few second in, he closes his eyes and his body goes still.

Stupid ass.

He shouldn’t have consumed so much booze. I watched him drink cup after cup, just waiting for him to slow down, but the more they talked, they more he drank. And Ava. God. Don’t get me started. It took a lot of control not to snap her pretty little fingers clean off her hand. Lucky for her, I’m not a rabid animal who likes to stake claim by pissing on the things I like. It’s probably a good thing. Ava’s a girl, sure, but she’s a strong girl. Her entire body is fit and defined. I bet she can crush a watermelon with her thighs. I mean, even her neck has muscles.

“What’d Skull want?”

Jai’s booming voice pulls me from my thoughts and I launch at him. I into him, clamping my hand over his mouth. He reacts slowly, flinching when my hand has already covered his mouth for two seconds.

“You wanna say it any louder?” I whisper harshly, terrified of someone overhearing.

Before I left Skull, he made it very clear what would happen to me if I betrayed him, and quite frankly, I like my nipples where they are.

“What’d he want?” Jai mumbles against my hand.

I pull it away, exposing his full lips. Underneath my body he shifts, but I don’t move.

“He wanted to know if you and I are on good terms.”

I neglect to tell Jai that Skull knows I’m an intruder…that I told him I was an intruder. I also neglect to bring up the fact that Skull mentioned his brother. It’d do nothing but aggravate him for no reason.

“And what’d you tell him?”

“I told him we are.”

His blue eyes search mine. I wonder what he can see. Does he trust me? Does he think I’m withholding information just as he is from me? Skull didn’t tell me what Jai is, what he does for a living, but whatever it is, it puts Skull on edge.

“You wouldn’t intentionally keep information from me, would you?” He asks, his voice firm and sober.

Our eyes remain locked, a million volts of tension crackling between us. I wouldn’t keep important information from him, but anything else, he doesn’t need to know.

“No. And I expect the same in return.”

He nods. “Of course.”

He says it with confidence, but it’s not enough to convince me. I can feel the dark seeds of doubt that Skull planted in my brain starting to grow. The things he hinted at...I’m not an idiot. I can tell when someone is trying to manipulate me, and Skull is definitely trying to pull me onto his side. I’m ashamed to admit I left his room feeling like I didn’t know Jai at all…and I guess in hindsight, I don’t.

His stare flicks over my face and his eyes become clouded as his brows pull together. “You don’t believe me?”

“Skull really wants to find out what you’re up to. He’s rattled. He doesn’t know if he should just kill you now or give you the benefit of the doubt…there are only a few things I can think of that would make someone like Skull think twice about killing someone.”

“And what are they?”

I shake my head. A conversation with a drunk man is a waste of breath. Will he even remember it in the morning? “It doesn’t matter right now.”

I attempt to lift myself off of him, but his large hands clamp down on my biceps and he tugs me closer, until our faces are barely an inch apart. My heart races in my chest, pumping faster by the second.

“You can trust me.”

Can I?

“I’d never do anything to betray your trust.”

Wouldn’t you?

“I can keep you safe.”

Can you?

I want to ask him all of the questions that flick through my mind, repeating themselves every few minutes, but I don’t. What does he owe me? He doesn’t have an obligation to look after me, to keep me safe. We barely know each other...and it scares the shit out of me because I care for him. I call him a friend.

“I believe you,” I tell him. But I just can’t rely on you.

My whole life I’ve fought for myself. I’ve kept myself safe. Trust can’t be broken when you only have yourself to depend on. At the end of the day, if it comes down to me or his brother, he’ll choose family. Family comes first…and I’m not family.

A sad smile touches his lips and, strangely, my chest grows heavy. “No, you don’t.”

I look away from his face. The look in his eyes...it’s too much. Why does it make me feel so terrible?

“This morning...you asked me why you were in my bed. You wanna know?”

Another nightmare, maybe. Funny enough, I work in a hospital and yet I’ve seen more death down here. Jai and I have never spoken of my nightmares. He wakes me up halfway through, then offers me comfort. That’s it. That’s how I like it.

“Not if you had to get drunk off your ass to tell me.”

That’s never a good sign.

“You were crying in your sleep. Your face was wet, your body trembling—”

I look back to his face, into his concerned blue eyes. “Jai—”

“—you were sobbing for help. I didn’t have to comfort you. You wouldn’t have known if I didn’t, but I chose to...because your soul needed it. I told you I’d look after you and I’ve stood by that promise even when I don’t have to...even when you’re not aware of it.”

His warm breath blows over my lips, warming my skin.

“Why?” I ask. “Why even bother?”

He takes a pause. I don’t think I’ve never seen a drunk man choose his words carefully. He glances at my lips, his eyelids suddenly heavy.

“Because we need each other.”

Because we need each other? He needs me too? I’ve always felt like I’m the only one clinging onto this friendship because I need him to survive, to get out of here alive. I should thank my lucky stars Skull depends on me to get information from Jai because that makes me useful, and as long as I’m useful I’m needed.

Jai’s gaze dances dangerously between my eyes and my lips. “I want to kiss you.”

Air is sucked from my lungs as his left hand moves south to my lower back and the right moves north toward my face. We always find ourselves in this situation when one of us, or both, is under the influence. What that says about our relationship, I don’t know, but it’s a pattern that needs to be broken. Still, alcohol isn’t the reason I don’t want him to kiss me tonight. I shudder, recalling the way Skull’s tongue felt against mine.

“Stop,” I whisper as both his lips graze mine, making my head spin.

He pulls back. “What’s wrong?”

I swallow hard. I wanted to avoid telling him about Skull, but he should know if he’s going to put his tongue in the same place Skull had a few hours earlier. I’d want to know if I was about to share spit with my enemy.

“Kiss me and you kiss Skull too.”

Jai’s brows furrow and uneasiness rises in my belly as he tips his head slightly confused. “What does that mean?”

I give him a few long seconds to process what I said. It’d be endearing to watch if this damn anxiety wasn’t forcing blood to surge through my veins, and if my lungs slowed to normal pace for a second. Realization hits him then, thinning his eyes into aggressive slits that grow darker by the second.

“He...” His nose crinkles on the bridge and his lips turn downwards as he grimaces. “He kissed you?”

“Kissed is such a nice word, let’s not ruin it,” I say—a dry attempt at humor. “It’s more like he invaded my mouth with his tongue.”

I can’t read him, but underneath me his body tense and completely still. Then it explodes. He explodes.

In the next heartbeat, Jai’s on his feet and I’m alone on the cot. The hairs at the back of my neck prickle in alarm as I sit up and brush wild strands of hair from my face. He looks bigger than usual as he paces back and forth.

“Jai, what are you doing?”

He ignores me. I mean, I expected him to be mad, but not this mad. He breathes heavy, his nostrils flaring, his eyes blazing with anger, his fists clenching aggressively at his sides.

“Did you hear me?”

“I heard you,” He snaps, startling me. “I heard you loud and fucking clear.”

He scares the hell out of me. The look on his face I’ve only seen once before. It was during round one, when he was beating his opponent to a pulp. I didn’t like it then and I don’t like it now, especially now it’s directed at me. Still, as my insides knot in fear I keep my face placid, my voice calm.

“Then answer me. What are you doing?”

Jai snaps forward and I jolt back, slamming into the concrete wall. A burning sensation slashes across the middle of my back, but I’m too shocked to feel it for long.

“How could you let him put his mouth on you?”

I splutter, like an idiot, before I find my voice. “Me? What was I supposed to do? I couldn’t stop him from tattooing me, what makes you think I could stop him from kissing me?”

With a growl, he turns around and storms toward his bag at the end of his bed. Forgoing the zipper, he rips it open and plucks a black object from it. That’s when I see it; the gun in his hand. I freeze, gaping wide-eyed. Where the hell did he get that? In a swift, almost expert, movement, he drops the clip and checks the bullets. They’re all there. He slides them back into the hand piece of the gun and pulls back the metal plate at the top until something clicks into place. A bullet, no doubt.

“Holy shit. You have a fucking gun?” I whisper, harshly.

I’d ask him where he got it, but that’s the least of my concerns at the moment. I jump off the bed.

“What exactly do you plan on doing with it?”

“I’m going to bury a bullet deep in the back of Skull’s fucking head.”

He turns toward the exit, his movements no longer tired and sloppy, but precise and purposeful. Before he exits into the main tunnel, I slip in front of him and push on his large chest. He doesn’t move back, but he does stop, and that’s good enough for me.

“Don’t be stupid, Jai. They’ll kill you—and me. Do you want to die?” I grasp at straws, knowing that someone under the influence of alcohol is harder to convince than someone fully in control of their emotions. “What about Joel? What about your little sister, Jessica? She’ll be alone. She’ll have no one.”

He looks me in the eyes, the gun still firm in his hand. “Did you enjoy it?”

I angle my head. Enjoy it? Enjoy what? “The kiss?”

Jai blows a frustrated puff of air from his checks and attempts to step around me, but I slide in front of him, pushing harder on his chest.

“No,” I urge, “How could I? It was after he almost stabbed me in the hand with a fork, knocked me off my chair and threatened to kill me. It’s not exactly a sure-fire way to a girl’s heart.”

He holds my stare, and every muscle in my body burns from being held so intensely.

“I’ll kill him.”

I nod, smoothing my hands over the large expanse of his chest. “I know you will. Just not tonight.”

Exhaling, his body relaxes. I take my chances and snatch the gun from his smooth grip. I’m surprised I don’t accidently squeeze the trigger and shoot myself in the foot. Behind me, someone clears their throat, sending my heart into my shoes. Without pause, I stuff the weapon into the front of my jeans and conceal it with my tank top. My pulse pounds holes in my throat and wrists. If I turn around, he’s going to see the gun.

I stare at Jai. He can probably see the panic on my face.

“Round two, Stone.” A worn, black boxing bag lands with a thud beside our feet. Dust scatters, covering the tops of my feet. “In two days.”

Jai doesn’t respond and eventually, the man disappears.

I slap my hand to my forehead. My skin is red hot under my palm. I’m certain the panic has given me a fever. I’ve never been so scared in my life.

“Holy shit. That was close.”

Jai holds out his large hand, exposing his wide palm. “Give me the gun.”

Yeah. That’s not going to happen. “No way, Rambo. I don’t want to die today.”

“I’m not going to do anything stupid. You’re right. We’re in too deep to ruin it now.”

I eye him curiously. “You’re not going to tear around the place guns blazing?”

I squeak as he hooks a strong index finger around a belt loop and yanks me close. “No.”

The back of his fingers warm my abdomen as he curls his hands around the handle of the gun and pulls it free. He towers over me. A beautiful giant.

“I don’t know why you bothered to learn to fight if you can operate a gun just fine.” I point out.

“A gun isn’t as much fun.”

A cold feeling tumbles through me. His words carry a lot of truth to them. After stashing the gun back in his bag, he locates my sock filled with toiletries, and tosses it to me.

I guess he wants me to brush my teeth. “Subtle much?”

He lowers himself onto his cot with a heavy exhale and throws his arm over his face. “Goodnight, Kitten.”

Huh. Just like that. If he went to sleep in the first place we could’ve avoided all of this, and Jai could’ve continued hating Skull for one less reason. I exit our nook with a strange, stupid smile on my face. I’ve never had someone truly care for me before. Growing up as an orphan, having someone care is a feeling you see, read, and hear about, but never experience for yourself. Well, I do believe I just experienced it and it’s...warming.

I like it.

Give Me Strength

Jai

I’m no stranger to murder.

I’ve killed...felt the sticky warmth of life on my skin.

I’m a killer...just like Skull, and I don’t deny that. The difference is; he kills for pleasure, for the sake of it. I kill for purpose, to rid New York City of scum, to make it a safer place.

I murdered four men in cold blood just to make it here; to prove I’m not on the straight and narrow, in hopes to win the trust of Skull and his thugs. The men I killed weren’t innocent by any means. They were convicted criminals of the worst kind and they got the justice they deserved. I made sure of that.

Skull knows what I am, and he doesn’t trust me because of it. I’m surprised he didn’t put a bullet through my head the second I descended into the tunnels. Either he assumed I’d have back up, or he’s curious to see if I’m as good a fighter as my brother.

You see, Skull is under investigation by every law enforcement agency this beautiful country has. Of course, it takes these government agencies ages before they actually get around to doing something about it—policies, laws, rights, and all that bullshit that protects the criminal more than it should. As soon as Skull’s case left our department and went to the ‘higher ups’ I lost it. I wanted to catch Skull. I wanted to be the officer to slap cuffs on him and make his life fucking hell.

But no.

They took that away from me because the FBI deemed Skull’s case too complex for the NYPD. Too. Fucking. Complex. They treat us like children. Incompetent children.

I don’t trust anyone with the case but me. Skull doesn’t have me in his wallet. I want something money can’t buy. I want revenge. I want blood. I want my brother back.

That’s right. I’m a cop—a rookie, really. I wasn’t in the line of duty for long. Once Skull’s case was lost to the FBI, I punched Detective Louis Balleun in the mouth, earning myself a nice suspension with no pay. It didn’t bother me. It gave me all the free time in the world to go after Skull myself. I knew my suspension could only help my cause when I decided to hunt Skull down. I tried to do it legally, but the justice system left me with no choice. Once he’s dead, no judge or jury will convict me.

I’m surprised Skull didn’t tell Kitten I was a cop. Instead, he used it to undo the seam of trust we’ve manage to stitch. She thinks I’m hiding something from her, I can see it in her eyes. I could tell her—it’s not something I’m ashamed of, but I can’t risk it. If anyone else catches wind that I’m a cop, I’m as good as dead. Seventy percent of the population down here are criminals—men and women my precinct has put away at one time or another. Skull, I can take on, but a hundred other hardened fighters? I’m as good as dead.

I wonder how Kitten would take it if she found out. Maybe she’d respect me a little more and stop seeing me as a monster...or maybe her moral self will hate me because I disgrace the very justice system I swore to uphold. It’s hard to tell with her.

“Can you hit that bag any harder? I don’t think you’ve woken up the entire left tunnel yet.”

I stop and turn around. Behind me, the bag I was pounding swings, the chains groaning and creaking. Emily sits up in her bed and stretches her arms above her head, arching her back.

“It’s noon” I tell her, unable to hide my clipped tone. “You’re the only one still asleep.”

“Ugh, really?” She runs a hand over her face and sighs. “Why does it feel like it’s still early?”

I cradle my wrist and clench my fist. I must’ve slept on it wrong. It’s been aching all morning.

“It’s your body clock,” I say, no emotion in my voice. “It’s all over the place.”

Her face falls a little, sending a pang of guilt through my chest. I don’t mean to be an asshole, but I can’t help it. I open my mouth and it comes out. I’ve never been good at pretending; at being fake. When I’m mad I’m mad, and it won’t go away until I do something about it. Granted, I almost took it too far last night, but I’m blaming that one on the shitty whiskey I flooded my body with. Never again. I’m going to start treating this like I would, if I was on the job. I need a clear head, especially now that my feelings are involved. I feel stupid just thinking that, but it’s true. I put Emily right under Skull’s nose. I can’t take it out on her if he takes advantage of that. And he will.

I try to unwrap my hands but the knot I’ve tied around my left wrist refuses to budge. Emily watches me as I tug at the fabric, cursing my thick useless fingers.

“Need help?”

I try for another minute before I give up and nod. Her cot creaks as she pushes herself out of it. Involuntarily, my stare falls to her bare midriff. She has beautiful soft, milky skin...I’ve touched it. I’ve dragged my lips across it, run my tongue along it. I crave the feel of it. I’ve craved her from the moment I saw the shadows obscuring her face, bar her lips, the night she followed me from the train. When she stepped into the light, she looked so tragic...so lost, but it was too late for me to save her. The spotlights were turned on us and there she was cowering beside me like a little abandoned kitten.

Fragile.

Innocent.

Terrified.

It didn’t occur to me until we got down here that maybe she didn’t need saving. Maybe she needed to be found. Her old life was pathetic, and I’m surprised she’s lasted this long. I’ve seen a lot of statistics, and people like her, well, they don’t last long in this world. Or maybe she’s stronger than I give her credit for.

“I assume you remember last night?” She asks, keeping her eyes downcast as she pulls at the blue fabric wrapped tightly around my wrist.

Even in this light I see a blush seep across her cheeks. I remember telling her she smells good. I remember her telling me Skull forced his filthy mouth on hers. I swallow the anger that burns my throat, letting it simmer in my stomach.

“Yes.”

Her lean shoulders droop and it makes me feel like shit. “Look, I don’t want last night to make things weird between us. I’m doing everything you asked me to do. If it displeases you so much, why am I doing it?”

“It’s not you.” And I hate that I’m making her think it is.

She lifts her light brown eyes. “Skull is, in every way, the exact person you described him to be. He’s rude, depraved, murderous and absolutely terrifying. I can’t fight him and you know that.”

I open my mouth and she lifts a slim index finger, cutting me off.

“Not so long ago you told me how easy it is to become owned by someone and I said it doesn’t work like that.”

She swallows hard. It makes me nervous—sick. A nasty bolt of nausea pins me right in the stomach. I nod, slowly.

“I believe you now…”

She pauses, leaving me hanging in a painful suspense. What is she referring to? Who is she referring to? I watch her patiently, as she pulls my wrist toward her lips and snags the fabric of my wrap between her white teeth. Her small, gentle hands cup mine as she seamlessly pulls the knot free. As she unwraps my hand, the air sticks to my damp skin, the feeling cool and refreshing.

When she frees my second hand, I go back to massaging my wrist now that it’s easier to access the muscle without the cotton hindrance.

“Skull—”

I snap forward, raking ten angry fingers through her hair and crushing my mouth against hers. If I hear the rest of that sentence fall from her lips I will tear this place down slab by fucking slab, brick by fucking brick. I don’t need to be a mind reader to know how the sentence will end. ‘Skull owns me.’

Like fuck he does.

Skull has taken too many things from me—my sister, my parents, my brother—but he’s not going to take her. Not Kitten. It’s not some grand gesture of love, or even a declaration of any kind. I promised I would protect her. It’s what I do, I protect people—good people. Emily is good, from the top of her head to the tips of her toes, and I won’t let Skull snuff it out.

For the first time in years I have a moment of clarity. Skull isn’t going to let me into his crew. I’m an ex-fucking-cop. Why the fuck didn’t I come to terms with that before? What is wrong with me? Sharp pain and grief slash through me. It kills me even to think it, but I can find my brother from the outside. It won’t be easy; try impossible, but I can’t risk Emily’s life too. It’s not fair.

We gotta get out of here.

At the very least, I have to get her out of here.

She pulls back, her eyes meeting mine. Her lips are a light pink, matching her flustered cheeks. I glide my hands from her hair, down to the small of her back. She feels good in my hands. I’ve never experienced a woman like her before. Having her so close all the time makes me crazed. The fear, the passion, the pure fucking grittiness of this entire situation fuels me—fuels my emotions, my desires.

And I desire her.

She’s not a ‘fuck her out of your system’ kind of girl and I can’t get rid of her now even if I wanted to. So, for the moment, she can stay imbedded in my flesh, heating my blood and driving me crazy. My blood rushes through my veins as her scent drowns me. I want her and I don’t want to die without tasting her one more time.

For the first time since arriving here, she clings to me, her large eyes glistening with fear. Whatever Skull did, whatever he said, it terrified her.

“I don’t want to die.” She mutters, blinking back tears. “I need your help.”

“Shit, Kitten,” I pull her close, burying my nose into the nape of her neck. “Nothing is going to happen to you. Not while I’m here.”

I hold her until her body turns hot against mine. Until her breath grows strong against my skin. As I hold her, she shifts her head and presses her warm lips against the skull tattoo on my collarbone. I tense. It’s still healing and it’s itchy as hell.

“I trust you.” She sighs, planting another kiss. “I trust that you’ll look after me.”

Emily nuzzles my throat and inhales deeply, as if she craves the smell of me—sweat and all. It means a lot to hear her say that. Her soft hands glide up my stomach and onto my torso as her lips press against my neck, then trail along my jaw. A tight groan seeps from my lips and she shivers in my grasp.

Fucking.

Hell.

The last time she touched me so intimately we were drunk off our asses. I remember most of it. I remember how good she felt, how quick she made me come, but I don’t recall my skin erupting in goosebumps like it is now. Or how tightly my muscles coiled with every peck of her lips. Last time I wasn’t aware of our surroundings. Ten people could’ve walked by and I’d have no idea, but this time every drop of water echoes in my head. When she pulls back again, I glance over my shoulder and her palm catches my cheek. She guides me back until my nose almost touches hers.

“You said it’s noon. Everyone will be eating.”

She often skips on meals and I don’t blame her. I’m not exactly first in line for the stale bread and runny broth either, but I can afford to lose body mass. She can’t. Emily is a slim girl, but she still has curves—however slight. In recent days, I’ve noticed those curves straightening, the muscle and fat melting away. I want her. God fucking knows I do, but I’m not a savage solely motivated by my baser urges. I take care of what needs to be taken care of first.

“You should eat.”

She slides her arms around my neck, her eyes sparkling and heavy lidded “Food isn’t what I want.”

Emily is flush against me, her perky breasts against my chest, and her thighs against mine. The second it takes for her to press her lips to mine drags on, but when they finally connect, every fragment of self-control I have goes up in flames. She opens her mouth and I groan into it before licking her tongue with mine. Fuck, she tastes good, like fairy floss and mint. I’m not a fan of either of those flavors but mixed together, in her mouth, they’re my holy grail.

I still can’t wrap my head around this woman. A part of me wants to use her for my own personal gain and if she wants me to fuck her senseless in the process, fine, I can do that too. I have no issues with getting my dick wet.

But then there’s another part of me...the part that wants to protect her. That part would rather fill her needs emotionally before it’d even consider connecting with her physically. Right now, those two sides wage war inside of me. In my stomach, as I back her against a wall, those to sides blend together and my hands don’t know if they should pinch and squeeze or pet and caress. My tongue is caught up in my confusion, switching between languid and bruising.

Then I have another moment of fucking clarity and my self-control reins itself in. It’s unwanted, but that doesn’t stop it from slamming into the front of my skull, demanding I listen to it. It tells me to listen to my surroundings.

I do.

Every drop of water echoes through my ears and distant conversation is close enough to hear. This is not the time nor the place for this. I remember something my father said: ‘a woman is beautiful. A woman is special. Never treat her in a way you wouldn’t want a man treating your daughter.’ He spoke them to me when he caught me reading a porn magazine three days after my fifteenth birthday. Talk about fucking awkward. I’ve always blamed Joel for that. He was the one who gave me the magazine in the first place. Anyway, as badly as I want to bury myself deep inside Emily’s pussy and pound her until she comes, I shouldn’t. She’s not that kind of girl to me. She mightn’t know her parents, but she’s still someone’s little girl.

I did it once. I fucked her against this very wall, until her legs could no longer bear her own weight. But I was drunk then…and it’s clear I don’t make the best decisions when I’m drunk. When this whole fiasco ends, whether it ends in Skull’s death or ours, I don’t want her to look back and see me as the guy who took her against a wall. I want her to hold me in high esteem, to see me as the guy who first ruined her life by dragging her down here and then saved it, making it even better than the old one. That’ll be enough to allow me to forgive myself. If she makes it out of here feeling empowered, not used and abused, I’ll be happy.

Her fingers dig into my back as I slow my kiss and eventually pull off, dragging my teeth along her bottom lip. She groans and lets her head fall back against the wall.

“Ugh. You can’t do that.”

Feigning innocence, I angle my head. “Do what?”

“Kiss me…” She closes her eyes and exhales. Her thumbs hook around the loose collar to my grey tee and she draws me close. “Kiss me like that and then stop. You can’t.”

Emily shifts her right leg and my thigh slips between hers. Her breath hitches as she squeezes me between her smooth, slender thighs. Shit, she’s hot. Her warmth radiates through her tiny, black shorts and heats my skin through my sweat pants. I can only imagine how wet she is. My shaft is hard, my balls ache and I’m certain the tip of my cock is leaking pre-cum, but my sexless resolve holds strong.

“Jai…please.”

Unable to help myself, I run the tip of my nose along her jaw until it brushes the lobe of her ear. Emily shivers as she rakes her hands down my arms and subtly grinds her pussy against my thigh.

“What do you want, Kitten?”

To not fuck her is one thing, to leave her horny and wanting is another thing entirely. In my experience, women spend a lot of time in their own head. You touch them too much they think you’re using them. Touch them too little and they don’t think you’re attracted to them. I’m attracted to Emily. Too fucking attracted.

I clench my jaw as my cock pulses painfully.

“You. I want you.” She all but begs.

Fuuuuck. I squeeze my eyes shut and inhale the berry scent of her shampoo as she rocks against my thigh. A light moan leaves her lips and sends goosebumps cascading down my spine.

I have to touch her.

I have to taste her.

God give me the strength to endure this because I’m a second away from imploding.

Universal

Emily

He tastes like stars. He tastes like hypergiant suns and supernovas all rolled up into one giant galaxy just waiting to be explored. When he kisses me I’m lost in a state of vertigo. The floor disappears and we defy gravity the moment our lips touch. He’s so hypnotizing, like the swirling center of the Milky Way, and, just like the universe, he’s overwhelming… in the best way possible.

I collapse further against the wall, surrendering to the onslaught of sensations. The electricity that began sizzling between us a moment ago is now crackling and popping throughout the tunnel, exciting me like a child with pop rocks on the tip of her tongue.

The last time I touched him like this I was too drunk to remember it fully, but this time, this time every feeling, every touch, and every emotion is being permanently engraved into my brain.

Though his mouth and his hands are working me into a freaking frenzy, he makes no move to tear my clothes from my body and spread my legs like the covers of a book. He’s vigorous one moment and smooth the next. It’s like his mind is fighting his body against sex. I know he wants it, but he’s holding back. I don’t know how much longer he can hold out with this magnetic current we’ve created coursing back and forth between us.

I gasp and he kisses me harder as his thigh tenses against my incredibly wet and swollen pussy, snapping me from my thoughts. His thick, hard cock presses into my belly while his hands slide to my hips. Jai flexes his thigh again and an intense shiver rips through me, almost causing my legs to buckle.

“You like that, huh?” He asks, breaking the kiss.

His voice is devilishly low and rough, and I nod, my pulse hammering through my veins.

“You need this? You need me?”

Oh, fucking fuck. “Yes...please. Please.”

I sound pathetic. My voice is barely heard over my ragged breaths—even in my own head.

“You can’t have me, Kitten. Not today.”

I open my mouth to protest, but he swiftly plants a wet kiss on my lips, silencing me.

“But I can give you want you want.” He whispers into my mouth before pulling away.

The tips of our noses touch as he slowly, expertly, glides a hand over my belly before lowering his thigh and slipping his fingers under the waistband of my shorts. Blood rushes in my ears and my chest heaves in anticipation, but I can’t look away from his eyes. I want to see them darken as he slips his fingers into my pussy and feels how wet I am for him.

And I am wet.

So fucking wet.

Impatiently, I press my hips forward as the tips of his fingers trace the hem of my panties. I only have one pair of underwear so most days I walk around without them until they’re washed and dried. I hate that today is one of those days my panties are clean and dry. Why couldn’t I’ve had my shit together tomorrow? Why today?

As the tip of his index finger hooks under the hem, I tense.

Bush.

How embarrassing. I’m not exactly sporting a full bush just yet, but I haven’t been able to shave in a while. What if he doesn’t like it? The last time he touched me there I was clean shaven.

He slips a little further, moving through my pubic hair without a flinch. As he reaches the lips, he moans and drops his head back.

“Jesus Christ. You’re killing me, Em.”

The lump in his throat bobs as he swallows hard and my confidence begins to rebuild itself. I guess he doesn’t care that I have hair.

A calloused finger gently teases my closed lips, the slightest lick of rough skin breaking through just enough to kiss my sensitive clit. A second finger joins it and he spreads me open before sliding them between my creases. I shiver and shudder as he glides his fingers up and down my engorged pussy. His heavy breath hits my face. Mine hits his. Hot surges of arousal roll through my stomach and I tilt my hips every time the tips of his fingers brush my opening.

“You don’t want to fuck me, Stone?” I ask, my heavy lidded eyes threatening to close completely.

God, I want him to fuck me.

Bare.

I want to put his cock in my mouth and trace the veins with my tongue. Then I want him to fuck me between my tits. I want to see his dick slide between the flesh right before he drags his pulsing cock down my stomach to my pussy and fucks me there too.

With a smirk on his lips, he presses a thick finger to my opening and lets it slide in to his first knuckle. It’s sweet fucking torture. I try to sink lower onto his hand, but somehow, he manages to keep me at teasing distance.

“Grab my cock, Kitten.”

Maintaining eye contact, I do as I’m told. I reach down and grab his cock. He’s hard.

Incredibly hard.

White hot arousal floods from my core and he smirks as it leaks onto his finger. He swirls it around before pushing the wetness onto my clit. My knees almost buckle.

“You feel how hard I am?”

I nod. “Yes.”

“I want to fuck you. I want to fuck you as hard as I can, all day and all fucking night, but I can’t. Not here.”

My breath hitches as both his thick, calloused fingers slide inside of me.

“All day and all night, huh?” I pant, whimpering when his fingers hit the right spot. “You better make good on that.”

He curls his fingers and I grips his shoulders so tightly, my knuckles go white.

“I will. As soon as I get us out of here.”

I rake my teeth over my bottom lip and quiver. Wait. What? Get us out of here? I don’t have time to chase my train of thought before my stomach begins to twist uncomfortably as I barrel toward my climax.

“You’re going to come for me?”

His voice, the pained huskiness of it, is the tip of the orgasm iceberg and I hit it, like the Titanic, and split in two. Jai shoves his mouth against mine, greedily inhaling my moans of pleasure. I twist my fingers through his dark, spikey hair as my climax violently rips through me. The unbearable heat of my orgasm pulses mercilessly through my center, and my wetness leaks around Jai’s fingers as I slide my tongue against his.

Soon enough, the heat releases me and my tongue slows to a lazy, languid pace. Jai catches my lower lip between his teeth and I wince as he bites down before planting a soft kiss and pulling away. As he slips his fingers from between my legs and removes his hands from my pants, my sizzling blood lessens to a simmer.

“Enjoy yourself?”

I smile and nod, leaning lazily against the wall. My entire body is weak and mushy, and I sigh as I close my eyes. Wait! My eyes shoot open.

“Get us out of here!” I blurt, my voice a hushed whisper.

Jai cocks a brow as he adjusts his sweatpants, looking at me like I’ve lost my mind. I did. But it was only temporary. Now my mind is as clear as day.

“You said: as soon as you get us out of here.”

He nods once, raking a hand through his hair. “I did.”

His hair, now in disarray, gives him a devastating sex appeal as some strands stand proudly while others rest flat against his damp forehead.

“Well?”

He plants his hands on the wall either side of my head. “Well, what?”

“Well, aren’t you going to tell me what it is you’re planning, exactly?” I inch closer, my voice quieter than a whisper. “You have a gun and I deserve to know what you’re going to do with it, especially if I’m included in this ‘escape’ plan of yours.”

“The less you know, the better,” he simply states.

“You can’t be serious?”

“Once we’re through with round two I’ll get us out of here. I know someone who can help.”

Subtle cheering rings through the tunnels, signaling the beginning of a fight. Our eyes remain locked, brown on blue, neither one of us backing down.

I wasn’t planning on telling Jai that Skull has offered me a way out of round two, but I can’t avoid it. Not now.

I swallow and shift my stare. A sign of guilt. His jaw clenches. He knows it too.

“What if I’ve found a way to make it through all of this—all of the rounds—safely,” I say.

He frowns. “What are you talking about?”

“Skull.”

Jai bristles at the mention of his name.

“If I give him information about you, he’ll give me a pass on every round...and a one way plane ticket when it’s over.”

His dark, blue eyes search mine. “If you believe him you’re stupider than I thought.”

“Jai—”

I flinch as he slaps his palm against the concrete beside my head.

“No!” He snarls, sending my heart crashing into my ribs. “You should know better! You think you’re going to walk away from this unscathed? As long as he’s alive we’re as good as dead. Do you understand?”

He’s right. I know it. I know I’m not going to live through this regardless of who I put my trust in. On the contrary, at least I don’t have to fight if I team with Skull...but then I’d be teaming with the bad guys, and I’d rather die with a clean conscience than live a sad, heavy life, weighed down by guilt. I nod and duck under his arm. Skull will no doubt be expecting to see my face amongst the crowd. I turn toward the entrance to our nook. Outside, the cheering grows louder as more people join the crowd. I barely make a step before Jai snatches my elbow in his hand, forcing me to stop.

“You mentioned a plane ticket? Where do you plan on going to?”

I glance over my shoulder with a shrug. He looks so handsome when he’s worried.

“Italy.”

He tugs me back and I turn, stumbling into him. His large hands run up my forearms, over my elbows, and along my biceps. His strong fingers brush my neck before he cups my face in his large, warm hands. Every pore in my body jumps to attention.

“After my fight, be ready. You don’t have to negotiate deals with Skull. I’ll get you out of here...I’ll get you to Italy.”

“I don’t want your money, Jai. It doesn’t feel right.”

He takes offense, his face pinching into a beautiful scowl. “But you’ll take his?”

Didn’t Robin Hood take from the rich to give to the poor? It’s the same thing. Skull is rich and I’m poor. Skull is also a bad person. Everything he has, he’s robbed and murdered to get. I have no issues taking from him.

“He doesn’t deserve his, and I have no reservations in taking from him.”

His grip tightens on my face. “You think all of that comes free? Soon he’ll have you ratting me out for a new pair of shoes. The gifts, the money…they will consume you. Don’t make owning yourself so damn easy, Kitten.”

That’s what he thinks? That a few shiny gifts will be enough to coerce me into betraying him? I don’t need money. Jewelry and clothing don’t buy my loyalty. My loyalty is earned, not bought.

I pull my face from his hands and tap the tender tattoo on my collarbone. “He already owns me, Jai. I have no choice but to do whatever the fuck he wants.”

His eyes flick between mine, his searing stare penetrating my skin. He’s still sexy when he’s mad. His face doesn’t contort in frustration. It remains smooth, but his aggression still manages to seep through. ‘Resting bitch face’ is what the nurses at the hospital called it. I turn away from Jai a second time and walk away. I manage to make it just outside the entrance before he calls my name. I glance over my shoulder.

“When you see Skull next, you’ll tell him I’m here for my brother, and I’m not leaving without him.”

I frown. “And then what?”

Lifting his arms over his head, he pulls on the back of his shirt before tugging it over his head. His slick, muscular torso is shown to me. Rivulets of sweat cling to his body and his sweatpants hang low on his narrow hips.

“Don’t worry. I have a plan.”

Worry downturns my lips. Don’t worry? Why does that automatically push me into worry mode? Heavy tendrils of dread burrow through my stomach.

“I hope you know what you’re doing, Stone.” I mutter to myself as I push off my back foot and head toward the main tunnel.

I hope you know what you’re doing.

***

My lips tremble and my heart thrums in my chest, pounding like the hooves of a horse on a racetrack. The smell of blood invades my nose as it sprays from the cage.

Hell. That’s where I am. I’m in the deepest, darkest pits of it, surrounded by the festering souls of hardened criminals.

They cheer on the lean man covered in barbed wire tattoos and thick, angry scars—Shadow, is what they call him—while I fight the urge to shield my eyes and block my ears.

Demons. That’s what these people are.

I flinch as Shadow’s opponent crashes to the canvas and scurries backward on his ass with his bloody palm outstretched, raised in surrender.

“Please!” He begs, blood running from his swollen eye, his crooked nose and his busted mouth. “Don’t kill me.”

Shadow has toyed with him the whole fight, causing the man immense pain and refusing to end it with a simple knock out. The crowd loves it.

Skull loves it.

I detest it. It makes me sick.

I reach out and brush Jai’s arm and he brings his ear to my mouth. While he’s close, I breathe in his scent. It’s warm in my nose...and comforting.

“What’s his name?” I manage to choke out. “The one on the floor.”

He moves his mouth to my ear. “Stefan.”

Shadow slaps Stefan’s begging hand away and swiftly sends a large fist into his nose. The sound of a defeating crack slices down my spine, making me shiver.

More blood.

Stefan’s body shakes with sobs, painfully twisting my heart in my chest. I clench at my ribs and stuff the tip of my thumb into my mouth to gnaw at the skin since my tidy, clipped nails are long gone. The crowd cheers for Shadow, oblivious to the fact one of them will fight him next round. I pity whoever goes up against a monster who has no compassion. To toy with a human being the way he is...I swallow a sob and clench my jaw, pressing my tongue to the roof of my mouth. I won’t cry.

Blood soaks Stefan’s grizzly, brown beard and drips off the ends of its stray hairs. He no longer pleads for his life. His body has accepted defeat. Stefan hangs his head and cries.

Actually. Fucking. Cries.

Hysterically. Begging Shadow for death.

I look up to the ledge only to see Skull beam proudly down at Shadow. Skull and Shadow, a match made in heaven. Skull’s eyes flick from Shadow to me, and I almost flinch at the sight of him. The skull...I’ll never get used to it.

A tear spills from my eye. How can he watch this? How can he be proud of such a maniac? Shadow probably eats baby birds for breakfast and washes them down with newborn tears. How can you trust a man who can take a life for money? Money makes him loyal. Not respect.

Skull runs his pink, glistening tongue over his bottom lip and smiles a full smile.

I look away. I hate him.

“What’s wrong with her?” I hear the low tone of a husky female voice ask.

Ava. Great.

I swipe at the tear that spills down my cheek. Jai turns sideways to talk to Ava and that’s when I move. Unexpected, pent up rage boils in my blood and seeps from my pores. The wire structure in front of me shakes as Shadow parades around the cage like he deserves the cheers that chant his name. As I march, I hear people talk. They refer to Shadow as God. He’s no God. He’s a brute with an anger problem. Don’t get it twisted. I’m terrified of him, but I’m more terrified for Stefan. If he’s going to die today, he should die knowing someone cares...that someone defended him and cried for him in his last few moments.

I shove my way through the crowd, dodging hands and catching stray elbows. None of them notice me, they’re too caught up in the moment, and I make it to the railing that separates me from the cage and a long drop to my death in no time.

“Emily!” Jai calls out from somewhere behind me.

I barely hear it over the cheering and chanting.

“Stefan!” I shout, gripping the railing tighter. It turns warm under my sweaty palms. “Stefan, look at me!”

As he lifts his head in my direction, I try hard not to puke. One eye is swollen shut and the other...my chest heaves. His sclera is no longer white. It’s a red so dark that it blends with his black pupil. He struggles to breathe, struggles to move...he must be petrified.

“It’s okay.” I tell him, offering a genuine smile. “You’re going to be just fine.”

“Just fine?” Shadow booms. He tosses his head back and exposes his teeth as he laughs a heavy laugh.

I ignore him, keeping my eyes on Stefan. He watches me back as he focuses on breathing. Tears from his eyes merge with the blood, creating pale red streaks along his cheeks. Surely his vital organs are filling with blood...I give him ten more minutes before his body goes into shock.

Shadow crouches beside Stefan and I finally lift my gaze to his face. Stefan whimpers and closes his eye as Shadow fists his brown, curly hair and yanks his head back. Slowly, I drag my stare to Skull. I didn’t realize it until now that the room is silent.

“You call this a fight? There’s no fairness in this,” I shout up at Skull.

Gasps and whispers break out behind me and I realize in this moment that I’ve fucked up. Dread; heavy curls of it seize my chest, but I don’t let it cross onto my features. I’m a dead girl walking on borrowed time anyway.

Fuck them all for being so afraid, for being sheep. In a room full of experienced fighters, how am I the strongest? Not physically of course. My strength doesn’t come from developed biceps or hard quadriceps. It comes from within. Unlike their bodies, my strength is unbreakable.

Untouchable.

Skull glares down at me. His jaw ticking underneath his ink. I look at Shadow. He’s sneering at me, his beady black eyes sending chills down my spine.

I square my shoulders and angle my chin up. “You’re weak.”

More gasps.

More whispers.

“Weak?” He repeats.

And I nod.

Shadow tosses his head back and howls with laughter. The tops of his teeth are spotted with decay, others covered with little silver caps. Unexpectedly, he snaps toward the cage with a snarl. I yelp and stumble backward only to be caught by two strong arms.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Jai demands in a harsh whisper.

He squeezes me hard against his body and pulls me back a few feet. I don’t take my eyes from Shadow, who laughs and laughs at the fright he gave me. I glare at him as he pushes himself to his feet and positions himself behind Stefan’s back. With a creepy, wide-lipped smile he slides one long-fingered hand underneath Stefan’s chin and places the other on the top of his head.

I take the time to blink for a second longer than I should, and when I open my eyes, Shadow glances up at Skull who nods his head.

My heart breaks.

More tears fall.

Stefan struggles to make eye-contact, but when he finally does, he offers me the tiniest smile.

Then, with a loud, blood-curdling crack, he’s gone.

Dead.

And just like that…Stefan no longer exists.

My vision blurs and I hold my breath as my stare falls to the ground. Tears collect on the tips of my eyelashes and drip in slow-motion onto the ground. The room stays quiet—or at least I think it does. Shock has apprehended my body and my brain. I don’t think I’d even register if someone was screaming directly into my ear right now. I feel Jai, though. The warmth of his body exudes over me, wrapping me in a protective blanket. His dry lips plant sympathetic kisses on my face—my cheeks, my jaw, my lips, and my forehead, too. I hear the rumble of his voice echo through me like a train rolling slowly through a deserted station, but his words are unclear, muted by the trauma I just witnessed.

Then hands grab at me and my senses come back, smashing into me with the weight of a wrecking ball behind them. The noise comes first; the raucous cheering and screaming. It electrifies me back into a state of awareness. I lift my head and everything in my line of sight returns to a normal pace for a split second…before it escalates dramatically in the blink of an eye.

Thick, calloused fingers barely manage to brush the collar of my pale pink t-shirt before Jai snaps forward, his fist connecting with the man’s jaw. The sickening thump and the tiny drop of saliva on my arm is enough to make me shudder. Jai stands firm between the man and me, and as he cradles his bleeding mouth, still reeling in shock, I recognize him. Jim. He’s one of Skull’s main men and a man who’d almost backhanded me in the face.

Jai is ready for him, and I doubt that Jim has gone up against anyone as magnificent as Jai. His broad shoulders are squared and his fists tighten and release, clench and relax.

“Stop playing with Stone and grab the girl, will you?” Skull shouts from his ledge.

I look up in time to see him turn and enter his little doorway, and that’s when I feel harsh, aggressive hands curl around my biceps, squeezing firmly. Jai glances over his shoulder, his angered blue eyes zeroing in on the hands seizing me. His jaw clenches and relaxes periodically, as they wait for him to make his move. He drags his glare from my arms to my face and I subtly shake my head. Don’t risk it all for me. It’s not worth it.

It’s as if he reads my mind. His eyes soften, and his lips droop ever so slightly at the corners. When Skull’s men shove me forward, Jai lowers his head and lets them pass. As I pass Jim, he swipes a large, hairy arm over his mouth, collecting a dribble of blood. Behind me, I hear him spit a mouthful of it, and if that’s not enough to turn my stomach, the entrance to Skull’s little dungeon up ahead does the trick. For the second time tonight, my heart races, crashing into my ribs and spilling a poisonous fear into my organs. My legs threaten to lock up and my breath blows strong, while my lungs are barely keeping up.

“You’re in for a world of pain, bitch.”

***

“Ugn!” I grunt.

Heat, fast and sharp, seers across my cheekbone as the dirty, concrete floor rushes up to meet me. I just manage to get my hands out in time to stop my face from merging with the cement. Tears well in my eyes. Broken pieces of stone and glass dig into the palms of my hands and shred my exposed knees. I clench my jaw, desperately willing myself not to cry. That’s what Skull wants and I won’t give it to him.

He crouches low, twisting his strong hands through my hair and clenching them into an angry fist. Pain sears over my scalp and I hiss through clenched teeth. Skull tugs on my hair, snapping my head back and forcing me to look directly into his face. His skull is disgusting.

He is disgusting.

From the pocket of his dark gray slacks, he produces a small, silver dagger and as he shoves it to my face, I see my pathetic reflection within it.

“You made me look weak, Kitten, and I don’t like looking weak.”

I rake my teeth over my bottom lip, doing anything I can to distract myself from the pulsating, rhythmic pain that slices across my cheek

“Stefan didn’t have to die.”

He frowns and the ‘bones’ of his tattoo crease as his forehead pinches together. “Who?”

As I open my mouth the door is kicked open and it slams against the wall. I hear heavy shoes and the unmistakable sound of something lifeless and stout being dragged across the concrete. My heart aches, bleeding into my ribs. His body enters my peripheral vision, feet first, and then he’s dumped less than six feet from me. His glazed eyes are barren, his skin seemingly fake. To think that he was alive not so long ago...I swallow hard and bring my stare back to Skull. It bothers me less.

Skull smirks and points to the broken man on the floor. “Oh, him? He’s a meth dealer. Forget about it.”

Forget about it, he says, like it’s no big deal. Stefan is a human being. He’s probably someone’s brother—someone’s father. Once upon a time he was a little baby boy that an adoring mother held to her breast.

“Dealer or not. He’s still a human being. You had no right to murder him. If he was such a bad person, you should’ve let the justice system deal with it.”

His smirk pulls wide, morphing into a black grin, and he withdraws his shiny dagger from my face and taps it on his lower lip. “The justice system?” He laughs once, untwisting my hair from his fingers with a shove my head. “You still don’t know?”

I frown. Know?

“The justice system is a ruse, Kitty-Kat. It’s a joke—a joke that keeps frightened people like you in line.”

“I disagree.”

“Oh really?” He stands up, rubbing his chin with his freaky tattooed hand, and beams at his goons. “This. Is. Gold.”

He turns back to me. “Fact: not even the people who uphold this so-called ‘justice’ system—let’s say, cops, for example—have faith in the system. All it takes is one teeny, tiny incident and they take matters into their own hands. They become a vigilante, of sorts.” He crouches low again, leaning in to my face. “Why, you ask? Because they. Don’t. Trust. The justice system. I could slaughter every single person down here and no community leader, politician, fucking cop, judge, or even the President of the United fucking States will give a shit, and you wanna know why?”

I swallow.

“Because everyone down here is a criminal. Well, everyone except you, but I’m not sweating it. No one knows you even exist.”

My throat constricts, making the next few words that fall from mouth sound thick and weak. “Why are you the way you are?”

His smiles falls, covering his perfect teeth.

“Where were you when you decided life isn’t precious?”

All traces of humor fade and his black eyes stay on mine. I don’t know how long we maintain eye contact, but he breaks it eventually to look over his shoulder.

“Get out.” He says to his employees.

My muscles tighten, the calm in his voice setting me on edge.

“Boss—”

“Get! Out!” He demands, pronouncing each word singularly, so they understand. I pick myself off the floor to sit back on my heels. While his men file from the small room, I touch the back of my hand to my cheek. No blood, but I bet it’ll bruise.

As the door clicks shut, locking me inside with the devil, my awareness flicks to high alert.

“There’s a story I like to tell...” he says, lifting his eyes. “About a young man and his beautiful pregnant wife walking along a desolate esplanade. I recall the serene, late afternoon, unrivalled by any other, like it was yesterday...”

I listen intently. Not knowing where the story is going or where it’ll end up.

“Up ahead, a man in a hood stalked toward them, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his jeans. The couple eyed him suspiciously as he approached, but they chose to keep walking toward him anyway. When they got within arm’s length, the hooded stranger stopped them with a flash of his palm...”

Engrossed, I find myself leaning toward Skull, trapped by every word he speaks. He talks with emotion, anger and sadness twisting so beautifully around each word. I didn’t think he was capable of such feelings.

“Without a word, the man withdrew a dagger from his pocket and drove it into the woman’s stomach and she collapsed to the ground with a gasp...”

I recoil, clenching my chest as my heart constricts.

“Why? Why would you do such a thing? The man screamed, cradling his precious, sobbing wife to his chest, covering himself in her blood. Her attacker smiled, wiping off his blade with his black hood and said; to witness a man cry at my hand...”

“Jesus Christ.” I gasp, grimacing. “You? You had a wife?”

He shakes his head and smirks. “I was the man wielding the knife. You see, some people turn evil because life fucks them over repeatedly, day after day, year after year, while others turn evil out of desperation and fear. But then there are people like me, people who are born evil, who don’t give two fucks who lives or dies.”

Emotion drains from my body. To be in the company of such a heartless, soulless human being...it’s too much. So I shut it off, withdrawing to a place he can’t hurt me. I worked in a hospital. I saw babies daily. Their chubby cheeks, little toes and balled fists...to hurt a baby is an evil not even the devil himself can commit.

“I don’t believe people are born evil. Whatever happened to ‘you might have been bad, but that woman and her baby didn’t deserve your anger.’ I’d call you a disgusting piece of shit, but that’d be an insult to pieces of shit everywhere.”

I want to ask him how far along the woman was, but it doesn’t matter. It won’t take away from the fact there’s no place on Earth, or in hell, bad enough for him. He watches me closely and I feel dirtier every second his stare lingers on my skin.

“I like you, Kitty-Cat.”

I grimace in disgust. “I despise you.”

“That has to be the sweetest thing a woman has ever said to me.” He grins. “Any news on Jai Stone?”

I repeat what Jai had told me. “He’s here for his brother and he’s not leaving without him.”

Skull scratches his head with the pointed top of his dagger. “I knew it. Sadly, Jai Stone is wasting his time.”

I fold my arms tightly across my chest. “Wasting his time? Jai knows Joel was here.”

Skull nods. “He was here. Now he’s not here.”

My warm blood bubbles, threatening to boil over any second. “Where is he now?”

He simpers, straightening his legs and tucking his dagger away.

“I suppose since I’m waiting for Jai to show his true colors, I’ll make a confession. Maybe that’ll push him to ‘co-cop-erate’, so to speak.”

I frown. I don’t get it. Does anything this psychopath says make any sense? He bends in half at the waist, lowering himself right into my face. The distinct, heavy smell of coffee blows up my nose.

“Joel Stone is dead,” Skull hisses through gritted teeth. “I killed him myself.”

No. Oh no. My innards knot, twisting together into intricate bows. A suffocating sensation lodges itself into my throat and I hunch. I can’t tell Jai that. He had panicked at the mere thought of his brother’s death. To learn the truth of it…it’ll destroy him.

“Jai will kill you,” I seethe.

“We’ll see. I’m curious to find out whose team he’s really on. He’d make a fine addition to my crew. If not...” He taps his tattooed nose and I’m forced to look at the inked cartilage. “Remember what I said. Vigilante.”

Lies

Jai

I don’t know how many times I’ve paced this stupid room since arriving here. One, two, three steps. Turn. One, two, three steps. Turn. I don’t know how many times I’ve worried myself sick just thinking about her. I rake my fingers through my hair and squeeze. Shit, Kitten. Why can’t you ever keep your mouth shut? Why do you have to be so damn headstrong?

Grains litter the floor and crunch under my shoe, a result of my tearing the boxing bag apart. My knuckles burn and my fingers ache, but it’s nothing compared to the worry painfully stretching out my chest. I should’ve fought all of Skull’s men. I should’ve destroyed them. I wish I had. I wish I hadn’t let them take her away. She could be dead...I stop pacing. My heart stops beating. What if she’s dead? I clench my fists.

Behind me, grains crunch. I square my shoulders and turn around. Her eyes are red rimmed and puffy, her hair snaky and wild. The pain in my chest lets itself out, like a pinhole in a balloon, making room for relief. She’s alive. That’s a start. I zero in on an angry, dark blotch high on her cheek bone. She notices and rubs the back of her fingers over it.

“It looks worse than it feels...” she mumbles, the tone of her voice not sitting well with me.

I hate that it’s there. I hate that I let it happen.

“Only you can take a beating and still look pretty,” I say, a lame attempt at humor.

What the fuck am I saying? She begins to smile, then catches it, but it wilts away, turning into a sympathetic frown. I step forward and her face pinches together, her lips trembling, as she tries not to cry.

I stop. “Emily? What is it?”

I address her as Emily. She likes it when I do that.

“Jai...” She drags a breath through her nose and drops her hand from her cheek. I try not to focus on the anger in the pit of my stomach when I see it again, and focus on the pain in her eyes instead.

“Skull...”

My stomach sinks. Tears well and spill faster than I’ve ever seen on a woman and trust me, I’ve been in the presence of a lot of crying women.

“He killed him,” She chokes out.

My brows draw together. “Killed who?”

Emily hiccups and inches closer with calculated caution. I don’t like it.

“I’m so sorry.”

With a swift leap, she closes the distance between us and wraps her slender arms around my waist, burying her face into my chest as I stare at the wall over her head. What the hell is going on?

“It’s Joel,” she sobs, her face muffled by the fabric of my shirt. “Skull killed him.”

Impossible. I don’t believe her for a second. Over and over she tells me she’s sorry, but I don’t feel anything. What am I supposed to feel?

I stare at the dirty floor, waiting for something to happen, waiting for her words to react with my emotions.

They don’t.

Minute after minute ticks by and I stand in silence. My bones ache and there’s a strange pressure on my ribcage, curling toward my vital organs. Physically I feel everything, but emotionally I feel nothing...because I don’t believe it. Thoughts and plans flood my brain and I can’t focus on any of them, there are too many. I don’t know where to begin.

Emily pats my back, an attempt to soothe me. I don’t need soothing. I don’t believe Skull killed Joel, not for a second.

“You think he’s telling the truth?” I ask and she pulls back to look up at my face.

Her swollen cheek grows darker by the second as a bruise forms underneath the skin. Before I rip Skull’s esophagus from his flesh, I’ll make him apologize for marking her face.

Kitten’s eyes flick between mine. I see the look on her face…the look of confusion. She’s judging me, and probably wondering why I’m not a sobbing mess right now. I bet she thinks I’m insane holding on to the belief that my brother is still alive, after a murderer confesses to killing him, but she hasn’t seen him. She doesn’t know him. Skull and his entire gang wouldn’t have been able to touch Joel. I’d bet my entire family’s fortune on it. Emily had cowered at the sight of Shadow, but Shadow is nothing. In comparison, my brother makes him look like a bitch.

“I think he’s crazy,” she sniffles.

“That’s not what I asked you.”

She nods, her eyes filling with sympathy. I hate sympathy. It’s an emotion people show when they think you’re not capable of handling things yourself. Fuck sympathy.

“Yes. I think he’s telling the truth.”

“Good.”

Her dark brown eyebrows, wilder now than they were when I met her, draw together and she pulls back even more. “What?”

Her pink lips press into a thin line and I plant a quick, dry kiss on them.

“Good,” I say. “Now I can show you why you should never take anything at face value.”

“Face value?” I push past her and she makes a small frustrated noise in the base of her throat. “Jai!”

I ignore her and stalk from the room in search of Marcus. Thankfully, she doesn’t follow.

As I march, I can’t help but let the frustration lurking in the pit of my stomach spread to the rest of my body. I’ve wasted almost two weeks down here thinking I’d run into Joel or pick up his trail. Surely someone who works for Skull knows where to find him? I’ve heard nothing...not even a whisper. That’s two wasted weeks I could have spent up top searching for him. I’ve searched all of the underground circuits, I climbed their ranks and mixed with criminals. Not once have I heard his name. It’s a good and bad sign. Good because that means he’s not dead. Bad because it also doesn’t mean he’s alive.

If Joel’s alive, I’ll kill Skull quickly, but if what Emily says is true, and Skull has killed him, I will draw his death out. I’ll torture him for weeks—months—until he begs me to put him out of his misery. Then, I’ll torture him a little more. Until I’m satisfied.

He’d want to start praying that my thirst for his blood cools off before then, because right now, I’m insatiable.

***

I find Marcus in the bar, taking cash and writing down bets. My fight is next and I hope, for his daughter’s sake, he places his money in the right corner. It doesn’t matter who my opponent is. I always win.

Marcus is smaller than the three giants he converses with, but he’s an underground veteran and commands a lot of respect. And, without question, the fighter’s give it to him.

He clenches a handful of bills, stuffing it into the back pocket of his ripped jeans, and then scribbles onto his notepad before flipping the cover over and slapping it shut.

“Stone,” he greets me as I approach, sliding a black pen behind his ear. “We were just talking about you.”

I look briefly at the three men on the other side of Marcus’s table, but don’t linger enough to commit their bulky bodies and plain faces to memory. Why should I? I’m not going to see them again. I’m out of here after my fight and I need Marcus to help me.

“Putting your money on the right man, I hope?” I say, as I saunter up to the table, stuffing my hands into my pockets.

Marcus smiles. “Always do. Can’t say the same for these three though.”

I turn my attention to them, unable to help an amused smirk. They can’t be older than twenty-one.

“Betting against me, boys?”

A stupid mistake. The tallest brother, assuming they’re brothers, leans forward, resting his elbows on the table.

“You know your opponent?”

I shake my head and they laugh, exposing perfect white teeth that are almost blinding against their smooth, ebony skin.

I guess I’m missing something.

“Freight is no match for Jai Stone, Kaan,” Marcus jumps in.

I chuckle. Ah, Freight a.k.a Cameron Michaels. He wasn’t too bad of a guy, not by the standards set by other criminals down here anyway. At the station we called him ‘Hulk’. He’s known for losing the plot and causing lots of damage to both public and private property. Once a month he’d be at the station defending why he put a chair through the windscreen of his neighbor’s car, or why he snapped an old ladies cane and then beat a man with it.

What Freight had in body mass, he lacked in brain power and as they say; ‘the bigger they are, the harder they fall’.

Kaan smirks, his eyes staying locked with mine as he lifts his cup to his lips, and tips whatever alcohol is left in it, down his throat. He’s confident at least, and I can admire that.

“We’ll see. They don’t call him Freight for nothing.”

The familiar tingle of a challenge tickles the tips of my fingers. I don’t like the way they’re smiling at me, like I’m way out of their league.

From my observation, there are three types of fighters down here. The first lot picked up fighting well into their twenties, some even in their thirties, and are still very much amateurs when it comes to the art of mixed martial arts. The second bunch are brawlers from the street who taught themselves, and the third group are fighters like me, fighters who’ve trained their asses off from the moment they could walk. I’ve trained and mastered every form of martial arts I can think of. My brain doesn’t work like everyone else’s. While my opponent is planning their next move, I’ve already taken the necessary steps to win the fight. And I always win—not because I’m bigger or stronger. I win because I’m smarter.

It was Joel who taught me to fight smarter, not harder.

My smirk stays firm as I continue the conversation with Kaan. “And why do they call him ‘Freight’? Do you know?”

The man to his left looks away in embarrassment as Kaan narrows his eyes at me and shakes his head. Of course you don’t.

“Didn’t think so. They call him ‘Freight’ because he pried apart the door of a freight container to rescue a litter of abandoned puppies.”

They give me ‘the look’. Disbelieving frowns, thin eyes and pressed lips. It’s the look everyone gets when they hear the origin of ‘Freight’ a.k.a Cameron.

“Terrifying, I know. I’m shaking in my damn boots.” I flick my head. “Get the fuck out of here while Marcus and I talk business.”

They stare, not knowing if they should obey or contest me. I never drag my eyes from Kaan’s. It’s a pissing contest and my bladder is full.

“I’d listen to the man if I were you,” Marcus states, leaning his elbows on the table. “He’s a loose cannon.”

Cautiously, but still trying to maintain their pride and strength, they slink from the table and disappear from sight. I stare after them, lost in thoughts of kicking the shit out of all three of them, until Marcus slaps me on the shoulder.

“Don’t worry about it,” Marcus says, pulling the pen from his ear to fidget with it. “You’ll show ‘em tomorrow. When you go toe to toe with Freight.”

I clear my throat and pull a heap of cash from my pocket. Marcus takes bets so, to everyone else, I’m just a guy who likes to gamble. I lean on the table too and flick through the money like I’m counting it.

“I need you to do something for me.”

He stiffens beside me, realizing immediately it’s an order, not a question.

“What now, Jai?” he demands in a harsh whisper. “I won’t get you another gun. It was risky enough the first time. I have a kid—”

“Will you shut up and let me explain?” I hand him some cash, two grand to be correct, and continue to flick through the rest. “The gate you met me at last time, you know, the south gate?”

Marcus nods.

“I need you to leave it unlocked.”

He turns pale and drops the cash I gave him, like he’ll contract an incurable disease if he holds it too long.

“Oh fucking hell, no. I’m not doing that. You’re on your own.”

He tries to back away from the table, but I catch him by the scruff of his gray shirt and draw him back. I wrap my arm around his shoulders and hold him close to the tabletop, close enough for him to smell the money he dumped. I didn’t want to do this—use his daughter against him—but he’s left me with no choice.

“Listen, Marcus. You don’t want your daughter’s cancer fund to dry up now, do you?”

Under my arm, his shoulders tense. “Jai, please.”

I don’t stop. “You don’t want to go back to working for Rule, do you?”

Rule is a slimy motherfucker who peddles low grade weed to high school students in Manhattan. A long time ago Marcus helped him sell the shit to make ends meet and to get his daughter her treatment. More often than not, he came up short.

His shoulders slump and he shakes his head. It kind of makes me feel like a dick.

“Look, Marcus, if you help me I’ll make sure you and your family never have to worry about money again. I’ll give you enough money to have your daughter receive treatment from home—her own private nurse and everything.”

He thinks it over, but I already know it’s too good to pass up.

“I’m the only one who works the gate, Stone. Skull will kill me.”

“No he won’t. I’ll shoot the lock, make it look like I shot my way out.”

He looks up at me with his skeptical eyes. “Why can’t you do that in the first place and leave me out of it?”

“Because I can’t risk it. What if it takes more than one bullet? I’ve only got one clip. If I’m going to make it out of town, I need every bullet I can get.” I moisten my dry lips with a quick lick. “Marcus, I need to know for a fact that the south gate is going to be unlocked tomorrow after my fight.”

He stares at the money on the table and that’s only a quarter of what I’m going to give him.

“How much?”

“Eight grand,” I answer, with no hesitation.

“You must really want out.”

I nod. “I need to find my brother.”

With a heavy exhalation, Marcus finally nods. “Fine. I’ll do it for you.”

I smile and hand him the rest of the money. “Thank you. Write my name down in your book in case Skull pokes his nose in where it doesn’t belong.”

“Done.”

I release Marcus, turn around and stalk off.

“I hope you know what you’re doing.” He calls out after me. “I hope you’ve made the right choice.”

I have, and there’s no going back. Now all I’ve got to do is to fight my ass off tomorrow, and wait for my plan to unfold. When we make a choice, we set things in motion, things that cannot be changed or undone. The consequences that eventuate from the choice made are unavoidable. We must face them. With every decision we make we’re taking a chance; we’re shaping our future, and each decision impacts our lives in a negative, or positive, way. ‘Every choice you make is important’, My mom used to say. ‘Even if you’re deciding what to have for dinner. Never take it lightly because that decision, good or bad, will affect you now, later, tomorrow.’

Skull took his decision lightly. Whether he’s lying or telling the truth about killing Joel, he’s made his choice and the consequences that’ll unfold from his decision are ones that I won’t take responsibility for. I’ll find out for myself if he’s telling the truth about Joel. Whether he’s dead or not, I want Skull’s head.

And I will get it.

Freight

Emily

The metal from the gun sticks to my slick back. I can’t believe Jai had me conceal it under my shirt. I’ve never held a gun before coming here and it’s terrifying. Don’t they go off randomly? I stop swaying nervously, praying I don’t accidently blow a hole in my ass cheek.

As the crowd and I wait for the fighters to arrive, I close my eyes and focus on slowing my breathing. The hot, stagnant air burns my lungs, stripping its tissues like a harsh chemical.

Jai still hasn’t let me in on his plan, but if all goes well, my lungs just might taste fresh air again, and I want that more than anything. This must be how a smoker feels—constricted, unable to fully expand their lungs. And they do it by choice?

I open my eyes as the shrinking crowd cheers. I’m right at the cage, my stomach pressing against the railing, and Skull steps out onto his ledge above me. Regret and guilt and worry tear through me so hard I feel faint. If someone so much as brushes against me, they’ll feel the gun. Thankfully, Jai made me wear one of his shirts. It’s loose and the fabric conceals it better.

I watch Skull as his eyes scan the crowd. He’s looking for me. He always looks for me and, eventually, he finds me. The coy smile he gives me when our eyes clash sends chills down my spine. I hate you, I state with my glare, earning an amused grin in return. I wonder how tonight would go if I draw the gun and put a bullet through his head right now? I’d be doing the world a favor, that’s for sure...but I’d also be taking revenge away from Jai. He’s worked hard for this...he was suspended from his job for this. I know he’s a police officer. I worked it out once I had left Skull’s room yesterday, and I haven’t decided how I feel about it yet. I have no right to be mad. Jai and I are still practically strangers to each other. I guess I just feel disappointed...disappointed that he couldn’t trust the system he swore into to get the job done. But his family means the world to him. It’s clear to me now that family is something you die for...and I hope I experience that level of love one day.

Skull puckers his lips at me and I shake my head, making him laugh. I hope tonight is the last time I see his terrifying face.

I drop my eyes as another round of cheers ring through the tunnels, giving me a throbbing pain in my cortex. Enter the fighters. First is the man they call Freight and, my God, does that name suit him. He’s not as tall as the last guy Jai fought, but he’s just as wide, if not wider. His shoulders are broad and bulky, his muscular arms rounded and plump, and his legs are thick and powerful. He’d be beautiful, too, if he didn’t sneer so much. Freight’s black hair is cropped and juts up in carefree spikes. His eyebrows are bushy and his lips full and swollen, as if someone sucked on them only moments ago.

I brush my fingers along my collarbone, not quite clasping my chest in horror, as the cage chains strain under his weight. He storms through the door and onto the stained canvas. I want to shut my eyes but I can’t bring myself to do it. As the straining chains rub against the metal beams that suspend the cage above the open mouth of the tunnel below, flakes of rust dislodge and rain down on me. I taste it on the tip of my tongue and, when I swallow, I feel them at the back of my throat. I hope it’s the last time I ever have to taste rust and smell blood while others rub sweat up against me.

Freight bounces. More rust falls. It happens over and over as he bounces in the cage, keeping his muscles warm.

Then the crowd goes off again and I drag my stare to the left of the room where Jai enters. I haven’t seen him for a few hours. Now here he is. Over the shoulder of the man next to me, I see his spikey hair and glistening forehead. He reaches up and pulls his green shirt off, and tugging it over his head, he throws it to the floor. Inch by inch he’s revealed until his entire form is right there in front of me. The lighting mixed with his sweat does amazing things to the contour of his body. Shadows pool in crevices, light shines on the most prominent parts of his muscles, and I...well, I’m speechless.

Jai

The cage looms. My heart beats against my ribs with bruising pressure. At my sides, my hands clench into fists, unclench, and then clench again. I don’t normally feel so damn sick before a fight, but tonight is different. Tonight, everything is on the line.

When I enter the cage, the door is shut behind me with a clang. I roll my neck on my shoulders until it cracks. I hate illegal fighting. There’s no glory in it. Only pain. There are no referees. No judges. Rounds don’t exist and neither do rules. You fight and you win. Or you’re knocked out trying. Worst case scenario? You go down and you don’t get back up.

I swiftly jolt to the right and feel a gush of wind blow across my cheek as I dodge Freight’s fist. What the fuck? Did I miss the signal to begin the fight?

I duck as another fist comes flying at my face. Alright, fuck the signal. If he wants to play it like that, fine.

I let him swing like mad while I duck and dodge, trying to gauge his strength.

Lean left.

Lean right.

Duck.

Lean left.

Lean right.

Duck.

Rinse and repeat. Too easy. I found your weakness, fucker. Patterns. Freight works in patterns. It’s where he’s most comfortable. He probably doesn’t even realize it. Patterns are all well and good when you’re training, but when you’re fighting a real fight, it can be your downfall.

He keeps throwing his fists so they’re constantly raining down on me. I block them, ignoring as much of the pain as I can, as it spreads up my forearms. I need to hold on until his pattern falters. Once it falters, even for a split second, I win.

A few minutes in, Freight’s breath blows heavy and I haven’t even started yet. When he breaks his pattern to throw a sloppy kick to my knee, I strike. I zip to the side, then dodge a meagre attempt at a punch to my ribs. I can’t help but smirk as he growls in frustration and swings hard for my face. I’ve always said; ‘there’s no opponent easier to beat than an angry one’. He snarls again when I dodge it. I crouch low and clench my hand into a fist. Squeezing my fist so tightly feels natural since I’ve been doing it for so long.

I push upwards with a growl, scouting exactly where I want to land the punch. Funny enough, my brain decided his throat was a good place to hit before I even threw the punch. So that’s where it lands. Even without gloves his throat hurts my closed fists. Yelping in shock, Freight dives forward, his large body crushing me underneath its weight, and we crash to the canvas.

I wasn’t expecting that.

I land on my back and quickly wrap my legs around his waist. Freight is bulky, sure, but there’s a big difference between ‘bulky’ and ‘strong’ and Freight definitely lacks strength for a man his size.

I squeeze him between my legs and twist my body. Somehow, I manage to flip us over while he clenches his throat. Without mercy, I rain tight, powerful fists down on his head and face. It doesn’t take long for blood to paint my knuckles and his rapidly swelling skin. He lifts his arms in a pathetic attempt to protect his face and I let him, as I slide back a little to drive my fists into his unprotected ribs.

I don’t have to hurt him as much as I am, but Skull is watching and I want him to see just how dangerous I am.

Sweat runs down my back, and the feeling I always feel when I become absorbed in a fight starts to grow in my chest. It’s dense and it’s dark, filling me with rage and anger. Like a black hole it consumes me and refuses to let any shred of light escape. I force myself, as best I can, to breathe calmly through my nose in an attempt to fend off the darkness for a little while longer.

And that’s when I realize Freight isn’t moving. I stop hitting him, my chest suddenly heaving. Screaming and cheering ring loudly in my ears and I pull my eyes from my opponents face and onto the crowd.

The darkness disintegrates.

I did it. I made it through the fight. I suck in a breath, hold it, and then blow it out. Now it’s on to phase two.

Just like I expected and just like I planned for, three of Skull’s men spill like cockroaches out of their little hideout, and storm toward the cage. I rise to my feet as they open the cage and walk toward it.

“Skull wants to see you,” one of them says. I don’t know who.

I nod as I step from the shaky canvas and onto stable ground. “I know.”

I reach for my shirt and throw it on. As I pull it over my head, I stop. One of a Skull’s thugs approach with Emily tucked under his arm. My heart stops beating. My lungs freeze and my stomach drops.

Shit. Fuck.

I knew Skull would want to see me after the fight, especially since Emily told him I was looking for Joel, but I didn’t expect Emily to come too. That’s why I stashed the gun with her.

The plan was to walk out of here without complications. Well, like always, shit just got complicated.

I reach out, snatch Emily’s wrist and pull her up against me and away from Skull’s man. Her small frame trembles against mine.

“I’ve got her,” I tell him, and he flashes me his palms.

“Alright. You got her.”

I hold her close, but not close enough for it to tighten the shirt and reveal the outline of the gun. As we walk, she glances up at me with terrified eyes. Her fear hits me right in the chest and I lose my breath. You’re going to be okay. I won’t let anything happen to you. Since the words I want to say are caught up in my throat, all I can do is offer her a comforting smile and pretend it’s all part of the plan.

And I know when sadness curves her eyes, she sees right through it.

***

Skull’s beady black eyes survey us cautiously as Emily hides half her body behind mine. I hate being in his presence. My teeth ache I’m clenching my jaw so hard.

“Don’t you two look cozy?”

He’s smiling, but I can see the bitterness in his eyes and hear the jealousy in his tone. Skull’s out of his mind if he thinks he truly owns Emily. Money and power aside, what woman could ever want him for who he is?

He rests his ankle on his knee and drags a pointed dagger across his lip. Five of his men decorate the room, waiting patiently against the walls. All of them carry handguns—knives too, I bet. Fuck. I need this to go smoothly because I don’t have the firepower to take them all on.

“What do you want?” I ask, impatiently rubbing my fingers against my palms at my sides.

“Ooh. Hostility,” he grins. “I expected as much, I suppose. I’m really sorry about your brother. I truly am.”

Don’t go there. Don’t fucking go there.

I scoff. “No, you’re not.”

He leans back on his little wooden chair, tapping his dagger on the top of the table beside him. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.

“You got me. I’m not sorry at all.”

“Then why waste your breath?” Kitten chimes in.

Her fear can be heard through the tremble in her voice. I really wish she wouldn’t draw attention to herself. Skull feigns shock, his tattooed lips curling into a perfect ‘o’.

“She speaks.” He lowers his knife to the table and extends his arms. “Why don’t you come take a seat, Kitty-Cat?”

A hot flush passes over me at his horrid pet name, and somehow, I manage to suppress my more violent urges. Just.

When she doesn’t move, he smooths his palms over his mahogany slacks, and pats his thighs. A few more minutes, I tell myself. Hold out on your urge to kill him for a few more minutes.

Emily gently squeezes my arm before stepping out from behind me. All I can hear is a humming in my ears and a single repetitive, solemn word echoing in my head.

Shit.

Shit.

Shit.

As soon as Skull discovers the gun I planted on her she’s dead. What was I thinking? She barely moves from my side, when I grab her face with one hand and plant a hard kiss on her mouth. While one hand cups her face, my other hand slips under the back of her shirt and onto the grip of the gun.

Her entire body tenses and I stroke her cheek comfortingly with my thumb as I pull it from the waistband of her shorts and move it behind my back. Thank God, none of Skull’s men stand behind us.

I remove my lips from hers and give her a little shove in Skull’s direction. Wide eyed, she glances over her shoulder at me, and I give her a nod of my head. I try to convince myself that whatever Skull says, whatever he does, it’s okay. It won’t matter in a couple of minutes.

All eyes are on Emily as I slip the gun into the back of my own waistband and conceal it with my shirt. Instantly, breathing becomes easier.

I’m fine as Kitten enters Skull’s personal space, and I’m fine when she turns around to sit on Skull’s lap, but the second the bare skin of her thighs touch his, and Skull’s smug black eyes flick to mine, I’m mad.

Subtly, I drag an uneasy breath through my nose and hold it before expelling it through my lips. Calm. Calm is good. I ignore my fists clenching at my sides as they urge me to slam them into something.

“Is there a problem?” Skull asks, his smile so big it splits his face in half.

I swallow hard and it hurts my throat. I can barely talk, I can barely breathe.

“No.” My voice is dark, tainted by rage. “There’s no problem.”

I dig my bare toes into the concrete as I fight to stay put. His hand, covered in graphic bone tattoos, glides down the length of her hair as he pats her like she’s an animal. I grind my teeth. He’ll pay for degrading her like that. I’ll make sure of it.

“Your brother won a place in my crew. Did you know that?”

I nod. Of course he won. I didn’t doubt that for a second.

“He was an impeccable fighter—easily the best I’ve seen.”

I nod again.

He grips Emily’s shoulders and pulls her back against his chest so she’s leaning on an angle, exposing a small strip of flesh just above the buttons to her shorts. Her eyes focus on the ceiling and her face is pinched, displaying just how uncomfortable she is.

“He killed for me. I’m talking brutal kills in cold blood.”

Emily glances at me. Her eyes rounded with shock.

“I’m aware of what crimes he might have committed while working for you.”

Skull’s hands brush down her sides and the tips of his fingers dance along her warm exposed flesh, making her shiver. A hundred angry wasps tear from my stomach and zip around my ribcage. The gun scalds my back, begging me to use it.

“And how does that make you feel, Officer Stone?”

I shrug. “I’m suspended. I don’t care what he, you, or anybody else does. It’s none of my business.”

“You’re not undercover?”

I shake my head. “I’m just looking for my brother. Tell me where he is and I’ll be on my way.”

“I already told Emily—”

“I know what you told her and I don’t believe you.”

He arches a brow, his lips still curved with a smug grin. Whatever he’s done with Joel, he’s playing it close to his chest.

“You should. He betrayed me and I don’t take something like that lightly.”

I grit my teeth, then relax. “Exactly.”

He angles his head, tracing one of the buttons on Emily’s shorts with his index finger. “Exactly?”

“We both know you’re not the kind of guy not the kind of guy who deals with betrayal as quickly as a bullet to the head. No. You seem like more of a...”

Emily’s body tenses as he dips the very tip of his index finger underneath the hem of her shorts. I watch as he does it before finally dragging my stare back to his.

“...torturer.”

A second finger caresses the flesh just below her hips. If he goes any further, I’ll shoot his fingers clean off his hands.

“You wanna know how he betrayed me?” Skull asks, and I shake my head.

“He fell in love with my woman. I killed him while she watched, and I keep her around so that she remembers it every time she looks at my face.”

“Why are you telling me this?” I ask.

“Because your brother owes me a woman.” His tongue slips from between his lip and traces the shell of Emily’s ear, making her shudder. “Yours will suffice.”

His hand slips between her legs and she gasps, jolting forward. That’s all I can stand. I whip the gun out and—BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Emily screams as the goons that flock around Skull crumple to the floor and I turn my gun on him, pointing it directly between his eyes. There goes my plan of not wanting to waste bullets. Five gone, just like that, leaving me with only two. Skull removes his hand from Emily’s shorts and exposes his palms to me.

“I’m not here to pay my brother’s debts, Skull.” I lower the gun to his shin. “Now, are you gonna tell me where he is or do I have to shoot you in the leg?”

He narrows his eyes. He’s not scared of a gun. I bet he’s had hundreds pointed in his face.

“You’ve got 30 seconds before more of my men get here, Pig. You’d better put a bullet through my fucking head or I’m going to make you wish you had.”

My finger twitches against the trigger. I want to. I want to so fucking bad...but then I’d never find Joel.

“Twenty seven.” He warns me.

“Come here, Kitten.” I shout, holding out my hand.

She slides from his lap and runs over to me. She’s breathing fast, borderline panicking. “Get the door.”

Nodding, she opens the door and we back out of it. Most of the crowd has dispersed. The ones that remain stand still, watching us in shock. I grip Emily’s hand and fucking run, pulling her along behind me.

People stare at us as we run past, and it’s not long before the door behind us is pulled open.

“Don’t just stand there!! Fucking kill them!” Skull shouts, his voice cracking with rage. “A hundred grand to whoever brings me that pig’s fucking head!”

Thirty, vicious, money hungry fighters launch themselves after us. They’re fast, but we’re already ahead. The concrete walls beside us are a blur. The dim lights over our heads flick by quickly and soon we’re in the washroom area.

“So not going to miss this place,” Emily pants, and I chuckle out of exhaustion.

Thankfully, it’s not much further to the gate and I’m fucking praying Marcus has kept his end of the bargain. If he hasn’t, we’re dead.

Sure enough, the gate was unlocked, the chain and padlock lying in a heap on the floor. Relief floods through me like a river that’s burst its banks.

I shoot the bar, blasting the slice of metal that usually holds the padlock in place.

“Go!” I shout, tugging Emily in front of me. She dives through the gate and I zip in after her, closing the gate behind us. I see the first line of fighters break free into the tunnel, coming straight for us. My nerves ram into my throat and my hands shake as I grab the chain and wrap it around the bars. Emily is right there with the padlock. Our fingers tremble as we try desperately to clip the damn lock into place.

“Come on.” I urge her and she swear under her breath.

“Shit!” Kitten shouts, falling back onto her elbows as they slam into the gate, throwing me rearward too. I scurry backward, my heart bruising my ribs, and I glance at the lock. They shake the gate and its rattle echoes through the tunnel, but it doesn’t open. I exhale. We only just managed to clip the lock in place before our pursuers slammed into the gate. They shake it like panicked monkeys, cursing and swearing, but the lock holds strong.

We did it.

Groaning, I pull myself to my feet and help Emily up.

“We need to keep going.” I pant.

We start with a jog, then break out into a sprint. I don’t know where this tunnel goes or where we’ll end up, but we keep on running anyway, leaving a mass of panic and anarchy in our wake.

Break Free

Emily

“Ahh.” I throw my head back breathing deep and inhaling clean air for the first time in two weeks. “So that’s what fresh air tastes like.”

Jai hunches over, resting the palms of his hands on his knees. His breath comes hard and fast, like mine. My lungs burn and my legs feel like jello. I haven’t run that fast in a long time. In a strange, nonsensical way, running for your life is kind of fun.

I don’t know where we are. We’ve run for well over an hour and a half since we emerged from a manhole in the middle of a random road. We didn’t slow then. We kept running, breathing so fast that we recycled the stagnant air already in our lungs. It isn’t until we slow to fill our lungs with fresh air do I taste the difference. I relish in the crisp coolness of it as it soothes my insides.

I glance over my shoulder as I clench my own hips. Skull might have already started looking for us, but he won’t find us here. I think we’re safe for the night.

I tilt my head toward the night sky and smile softly as a drizzling of raindrops wet my cheeks, cooling my hot skin. I’ve always loved the rain. I love the way it sounds. I love the way it falls freely, landing where ever it wants like nothing can stop it. I suppose nothing can stop it. Rain is badass!

“Why are you smiling?” Jai pants, straightening his back and tilting his head to feel the cool rain on his cheeks too.

“It’s rain,” I chuckle and he looks at me. “You’re being rained on.”

Under the bright streetlight and against the black cover of night, the rain resembles a thousand tiny sparks of fire. They pour over Jai and he looks striking as the sweat that drenches his green tee forces the fabric to cling to his torso. He points his chin to the sky again and smiles as it patters against his overheated skin.

“I am.”

I extend my arms, letting the cool water hit as much of my body as it can. The water is clean—or at least it’s cleaner than the water that leaked from cracks in the tunnels. This water falls straight from the heavens. It’s as pure as it gets.

Fuck, it’s good to be alive!

I shut my eyes and try desperately to calm the burning in my lungs. Nothing helps, but it’s okay. There are far worse things that could be happening to me right now. I’ll take scorched lungs over Skull any day.

As the rain morphs from a drizzle to a downpour, I catch rivulets of it on my tongue and swallow, hoping to ease my scorching throat. It feels nice, but it doesn’t relieve the pain. Again, in this moment, I don’t really mind.

Jai exhales, pulling me from my own head. “We have to keep moving.”

My knees threaten to buckle at his words. I can’t keep going. Now we’re out of the immediate danger zone, my body is seizing up.

I groan, dropping my arms and slumping my heavy shoulders. “I don’t think I can.”

He turns around and slaps his back, gesturing for me to get on. “I know where we are. I’ve got a plan.”

We’ve run the same distance. If I’m tired, then I’m certain Jai is exhausted. He fought a giant not long before we ran for our lives.

“I’m not getting on your back, Jai.”

He glances over his shoulder at me. “Why not?”

“I don’t fancy eating a mouthful of concrete,” I say, showing him my busted elbows. “I’m damaged enough.”

I tore them open when the fighters slammed into the gate and I fell back. They’ve been stinging for hours now, growing marginally worse every time a drop of salty sweat rolls across the split skin.

Jai turns around to face me, his head tipping to the side like an adorable puppy. It makes me smile.

“You think I’d drop you?”

I shrug. “I’m not willing to find out. You must be exhausted.”

“Not even close.” He smiles. “I could take on a bear.”

I laugh. “Is the entire criminal underworld not enough for you? I can walk.”

Jai’s smile pulls wider, exposing his teeth, as he looks away and laughs. As quick and as glorious as the laugh comes, it blows away in the crisp breeze, taking his smile with it. In his worried stare, I see cogwheels turning. It’s not often I see through the stoic front he puts on, so when I get a glimpse of his human emotions, I find myself mesmerized. He’s a beautiful man.

Inhumanely beautiful.

I step closer to Jai, the raw soles of my feet screaming as I press them against the asphalt of the empty road. His eyes flick to mine. The blue I have to imagine, since his irises are hidden by shadow.

“He’s going to come looking for us, Emily. He’s going to come at us with everything he has…”

The grimness in his voice…it hits home and the weight of the situation crashes against my shoulders. Our little victory, our escape, will be short lived. In the morning, a mere couple of hours away, the real fight starts.

I swallow, unable to moisten my parched throat, and nod. “I know.”

He turns and offers me his back, this time not saying a word. Not wanting to fight him, I grip his shoulder and jump on. My thighs wrap around his hips, my arms around his neck. Despite how tired he is, I feel supported and protected—even more so when he tucks his arms under the back of my aching knees. Despite the rain, his body is warm and welcoming.

“I’m going to keep you safe, Kitten,” he says, his back vibrating against me. “From tomorrow I’ll keep you out of trouble.”

I frown. “From tomorrow?”

He nods and from the side, I spot a cheeky smile breaking through. “Tonight we have a car to steal and a house to break into so…tomorrow.”

I laugh as he sets off down the road, heading in a direction unknown to me. A few steps in, I rest my chin against his shoulder and close my eyes.

“Tomorrow it is.”

On The Run

Emily

The cold wind blasts through my hair, causing sharp, black strands to whip across my face. My heart slams into my ribs over and over, and the ruthless pounding drums through my ears, vibrating across my brain. Out of sheer terror, I clench the strap of the seat belt as it bites into my torso. Squeezing my eyes shut, I pray to a God I suddenly believe in.

Jai’s warm, damp palm glides over the top of my knee and rests on my thigh, pulling me from my thoughts.

“Don’t look so scared, Kitten.” He teases as I reluctantly open my eyes. “I know what I’m doing.”

I don’t drive. In fact, I don’t even have a license. You wanna know why? Because I’m absolutely petrified of being in a car accident. Even at normal speeds uneasiness sits in my stomach. It remains there, feeling uncomfortable and heavy, until my own two feet are on solid ground again. We’re currently going one hundred miles an hour down a deserted strip of asphalt somewhere in the outskirts of New York and it feels worse than I could have imagined. My stomach squeezes, my heart pounds, and my blood thins, making me dizzy and nauseous all at once. Like a rollercoaster from hell.

“Do you have to drive so damn fast?” I breathe as bitter bile from the deepest pit of my stomach burns at my throat.

“It’s a stolen car.” He points out over the roar of the engine, his lips quirk into a smug smile. “So yeah. Kinda.”

I’ve never broken the law. Not really. I mean, I’ve smoked marijuana here and there but that’s hardly a crime. Tonight, however, I’ve assisted in grand theft auto. I was there when Jai broke into a dealership and stole the keys to a sleek, black Camaro. I have no idea what the name means exactly, but judging by the way Jai’s eyes lit up as he stood before the black beauty, weighing the keys in his hand, he did. How many years will I get for assisting in a crime as big as that? To be honest, I wish we had never made it out of the car yard.

He drives fast—so fast I feel weightless, like an asteroid hurtling through space. The car doesn’t feel heavy like it did when I got in. It feels as light as paper as it cuts effortlessly through the night air. It doesn’t help I know that the faster things go, the harder they crash.

People speed all the time and they love it. They claim it’s exhilarating and exciting. How lucky for them. I find it absolutely terrifying. There’s nothing exhilarating about the way my heart beats, causing my blood to rush through my body. There’s nothing exciting about the way my ribs clench my lungs making them compress against my spine, lessening the amount of air I’m able to breathe. To top it off, I can barely rationalize my thoughts because my subconscious keeps screaming three little words at me. Somehow, amongst all of the chaos raging inside my small body, I hear the same three words over and over.

Please.

Don’t.

Crash.

“Flooring—shit!—the car down side streets to get to my apartment isn’t—oh, fuck!—exactly subtle.” I manage to squeeze out.

A dense pressure squeezes my ribs and I’m surprised my heart manages to stay in my chest as opposed to being shot out of my throat and embedding itself deep into the dashboard.

“I’m not aiming for subtle.” The steering wheel creaks as he squeezes the stitched leather. “Don’t worry so much. We’ll ditch the car closer to your place and do the rest on foot. Once you’ve grabbed some things, I’ll find us another car and we can make the final leg of the trip. It’ll be fine.”

Trip? It’s a trip now, is it? I’ve never been on a trip, but I know they’re supposed to be fun. Nothing about any of this is fun. Where are we going anyway? Is it a country environment or will we be in the city? Do I pack for harsh, cold weather or does he plan on sticking us in a warm and damp underground tunnel again? This is critical information when packing! I don’t want to pack skirts and dresses and then end up at the damn North Pole.

“Where are we going?” I ask, swallowing hard.

Effortlessly, he changes gears and casually brings his hand back to the smooth, leather wheel. He’s driven at these speeds before—that much is obvious. His movements so far have been flowing and relaxed. He leans back into his seat, completely at ease, as if we’re driving under the speed limit instead of doubling it.

I squeeze the strap of my seat belt tighter, feeling lighter without Jai’s heavy hand anchoring me down.

“You’ll see when we get there.”

I’d glare at him if I could bring myself to tear my eyes from the world that rushes past me.

Up ahead a corner is approaching at an insane speed and if the last corner is anything to go by…Jesus. I lower my hands to grip the leather seat.

“Shit.” I swear under my breath, as the palms of my hands slide over the leather. Anxious sweat leaks from my pores, making my grip weaker than I want it to be.

Please.

I squeeze my eyes shut.

Don’t.

Pain radiates through my jaw as I clench my teeth and the car slides into the turn.

Crash.

The tires screech and Jai sighs, reveling in the motion and the noise.

He hits the gas and the car shoots out of the turn, leaving the smell of burnt rubber and the sound of angry squeals behind us.

***

With ease, the car rolls between two dense bushes before stopping completely. Heat, a nervous and uncomfortable heat, blooms in my armpits and rolls down my spine. No random streaks of light leak in through the windows from the street, drowning us in darkness. The only sound inside the car besides the soft rumble of the engine is my panicked gasps for air.

Holy shit.

We made it.

I’m alive.

Jai pulls on the parking brake and turns the key. The rumble of the engine cuts out, exposing my anxiety. Deep heavy breaths I can’t stop is the only sound besides the ticking of the cooling engine.

“You okay?” Jai asks, the embodiment of calm.

Of course he’s calm. Jai has a handle on just about every situation. When I’m a fucking mess he’s cool and composed. Despite that, I nod, keeping my stare locked on the front windscreen. I’m unable to bring myself to look at him. If I do and he betrays even the slightest hint of worry or fear, I’m done. I’ll crumble like the edge of a weak cliff after a hurricane has smashed into it. Jai is a rock, the solid foundation that keeps my fears in check. When he is calm, I have faith in our situation, but if I look at him now and I see fear I’ll lose confidence.

We wait in silence and even though the wheels of the car are immobile underneath me, my heart continues to thrum painfully in my chest. The reason for it is blaring its sirens in the distance, getting closer and closer. Cops are the last thing we need, but at least they’re an expected problem. I can almost taste the metallic bars of the cell they’re going to cage me in as the sirens ring through my ears, sending vibrations over my brain.

“Fuck.” Jai swears, looking over his shoulder.

Panic rises. I can’t go to prison. I’m too skinny for prison! My hair is too long and my breasts are too firm. Does it work the same as a male prison? Can I become someone’s bitch in a female prison? I don’t want to find out.

The wailing sirens grow louder and my fingers find their way into my mouth. I wince as I suck my thumb between my lips and gnaw on my nail. The tips of my fingers are sore from weeks of nervous chewing. At this rate they’ll never recover.

We’re like sitting ducks here. If they decide to use a spotlight, we’re done for. There’s no disguising the bright light that’ll reflect off the body of the car, even if it is shrouded in sticks and leaves.

I look at Jai. His face is stern, his lips pressed into a thin line.

“We should run.” I mutter and he shakes his head.

“Wait for them to pass. Then we’ll move.”

“You’re a cop. Isn’t there some kind of bro code?”

Jai shakes his head again. “Bro code? No. Who knows which ones Skull has in his pocket.”

I jump as flashes of red and blue light illuminate our surroundings. It disappears in a flash and I hold my breath as the blaring sirens fade into the distance. We wait in defeating silence for what feels like an eternity before I ask:

“Do you think we lost them?”

“For the moment. C’mon.” Jai turns the key and, without starting the engine, small LEDs on the dash light up.

I watch as he reaches for the roof of the car and presses a little, black button. Soft whizzing fills the air and hums against my eardrum as the small window in the roof opens.

“Since we can’t get our doors open we’ll have to through the roof." He smiles at me. "You first.”

With shaking hands, I exhale and unclip my seatbelt. Somehow, I manage to turn in my seat and reach up and grip the edges of the roof. This car’s sun roof isn’t designed for averaged sized humans to climb out of. Groaning, I pull myself out of my seat and straighten my legs. The ropes of muscle in my arms and legs scream at me, making me hiss through my teeth. A few hours ago, I was running for my life and I barely felt pain then. Now it seizes my muscles and grips my bones. We have to stop soon or I’m going to collapse.

The cool night air blows against my heated skin, making the clammy beads of sweat that line my brow cold and uncomfortable. Still, as shitty as my current situation is, I have to remind myself I’m no longer trapped underground and I no longer have to fight for my life. That alone deserves a celebration. Skull will come after us, that much is guaranteed, but I can handle that. I’m good at running. I’ve been doing it my whole life. Fun fact: I was born in Sacramento and was shifted between there and Oregon until I was fourteen. Once I realized no one wanted me I ran and I made it as far as Colorado too, but I was caught as soon as I hit the state line and thrown back into the cesspool that is foster care. Two days before my fifteenth birthday I ran again and this time I was more careful. I stayed off the streets, never lingered in one place for too long, and I did my best to look like a kid who had a family who cared.

Kansas.

Arkansas.

Tennessee.

Virginia.

Pennsylvania.

Delaware.

I’ve slummed around in all of them. It wasn’t until half a year later, when I ended up in Trenton. Admittedly, I got too comfortable and it was my own fault I got pulled in by a “Detective John McCabe”. Within a day I was placed into another children’s home on the outskirts of New York City. I remained in the children’s home until I aged out and was left to fend for myself. I didn’t mind. I graduated from high school—just—and was able to land a job at a fast food joint, flipping burgers. During that time, I slept on a random Japanese woman’s couch who I met back when I crashed bingo games for free food and (occasionally) booze. She let me stay with her until I saved enough cash to put myself through my nursing course. She passed away the week the hospital began paying me. Her landlord let me rent her apartment to save the hassle of advertising. As strange as it sounds, I lived with Sue for months…but she was still a stranger to me. I had no connection to her, nor her to me. It also didn’t help that I couldn’t speak Japanese. Now that I think about it, I didn’t even cry when I found out nor did I attend her funeral. What kind of sick shit is that? Anyway, I don’t mind fending for myself. I’m used to it and though I’ve never had a proper home here in NYC I’ve always felt like I belonged, that my blood is linked with the trash, rust and dregs of this otherwise beautiful city. As I climbed the roof of the children’s home every night and watched the lights of the city flick on level by level, building by building, I knew that even if I never found a home, I would always have a home…and in some twisted way that made sense to me…to my damaged teenage mind.

Kitten’s Place

Jai

She jumps as I place my hand on the back of her slender calf. It feels incredibly small and weak in my hand, sending a pang of guilt through my stomach. My body is built for high intensity situations. Hers isn’t.

“You okay up there?” I ask, leaning closer to peak out through the roof.

“Uh, yeah,” She glances down at me, her face skewed by shadow. “Sorry. I zoned out for a second.”

I keep my hand on the warm skin of her leg. Under my palm, her muscles tremble and spasm. I bet they hurt like hell—though I doubt she’s the kind of woman to admit the pain. Emily is a strong girl, stronger than she looks, but she’s not invincible. That’s for damn sure.

Her calf slides out from underneath my hand as she pulls herself up and out of the sunroof. I follow, ignoring the scream of my own muscles as they tighten and relax, threatening to seize up with a painful cramp.

Sharp twigs dig into my skin and pierce the surface in some places. Ahead, Emily curses under her breath as she slides off the trunk of the car and pushes her way through the broken shrubbery I forced the car through. If the police do a lap and come back in this direction they’ll see the car. Ideally, we’ll need to be on the thruway before then. We have to be far enough ahead to ditch the second car with ease. If they catch us…we’re done.

I slide off the back of the car and—shit—I fall back against the vehicle, catching myself with my elbows on the trunk. Against the firm ground my legs feel like jelly. Boneless and weak.

“Jai?” Emily calls through the bush with a light, curious tone.

I need to get my shit together before she finds me like this. I know she looks to me for reassurance and comfort. I have to appear strong on the outside even when I’m deteriorating on the inside.

“Yeah.” Hanging my head back, I inhale a lungful of air and roughly expel it before pushing off the car. “I’m coming.”

Walking is a piece of cake once I get used to using my legs for something other than resting against a gas pedal. Sitting down, even for that short period of time, caused my muscles to cramp up. They’re bruised. I can feel it. It’s as if someone has taken a meat mallet to my body. It hurts, but it doesn’t hurt as much as running from Skull does. I don’t think my pride will ever let me live that one down. I should have put a bullet between his eyes. Fuck. I wish I did. It’s all I’ve thought about since breaking out of the tunnels. I had the chance…I had a hot, smoking gun in my hand and it was pointed right at his ugly face.

Squeeze.

Bang.

That’s all it would have taken. I could’ve ended it. I could’ve cut my losses and dealt with the consequences after the fact.

But I didn’t…

The sidewalk moves quickly under our feet as we walk in the direction of Emily’s apartment. The bottoms of my feet are raw and blistered. Every step is like bare feet to a plate of hot coals. To be honest, I’m surprised my skin isn’t worn down to the bone.

The street is void of any cars or people. Across the road and twenty feet ahead, a skinny, black cat crouches beside two overfilled bins. It watches us with its head pulled into its shoulders and its back arched in defense. When we’re ten feet away I hear it growl and hiss. I smirk. The alley cat is about as intimidating as Emily was when I met her.

Fear. That’s all it is.

Feeling a pulse of sympathy tug at my heart strings, I step off the edge of the sidewalk and onto the road only to have Emily’s hand snag the underside of my bicep in an attempt to pull me back.

“Are you crazy? Don’t go near that thing.”

The cat retreats behind a metal bin and refuses to come back out. Not even for a curious peek.

“Why?”

“It’s an alley cat and obviously not a nice one. You’ll need a shot if it scratches you.”

I frown as she smiles a tired smile.

“It’s just a cat.” I say. “How much damage could it really do?”

“Wow. You’re really not from this side of town, are you? I hate to break it to you, Precious, but the animals around here are anything but friendly. You give them a chance and they’ll rip your flesh from your bones.”

I laugh, surprised I even manage it. “Jesus Christ. You’re so dark.”

“It’s the truth.”

“Have you ever stopped to think for a second that maybe, maybe, if you give them a moment of your time, sided with a little compassion and a handful of food, they wouldn’t be so feral?”

She snorts. “That’s the silver spoon talking.”

I stop walking. It could be because I’m exhausted therefore making me extra irritable, but her words hit me wrong. Silver spoon? Bullshit.

“Oh, I forgot. Being born into a wealthy family means I know jack shit about the ‘real’ world, right?”

Emily turns to face me, confused. “No—”

“—I’m a police officer in New York City, Kitten. I’ve seen shit you can’t even imagine.” I gesture around us. “This place—your area—it’s a fucking haven compared to some of the places I’ve been.” I pause then scoff. “A silver spoon. That’s some real bullshit. That cat would be a walk in the park. Try being chased by a jacked up Rottweiler as foam spills from its mouth.”

“That’s not what I meant. I mean, I did mean it like that, but I didn’t mean it like that.”

I roll my eyes. Yeah, like that makes any sense.

She continues down the sidewalk. “All I’m trying to say is; it’s common knowledge that you shouldn’t approach feral animals. It’s dangerous, not to mention hazardous for your health.”

I smile at the irony of it. Emily coaching me on things that are hazardous to my health? What are the odds? That girl is a magnet for disaster.

“An interesting piece of advice you’ve chosen to give me.” I say as I follow closely behind her. “If you listened to it yourself you’d have never been trapped underground.”

Her lips quirk and all evidence of our argument disintegrates. “Yeah, well, I’m no good at following advice—even my own.”

She peers sideways at me and I almost falter in my steps. I’ll be damned. The murky street lights barely light her features, but even so, the girl is pretty. She’s pushed herself to the brink of complete exhaustion and still her big, pretty eyes and hollow cheeks squeeze my stomach in the strangest of ways.

“Besides, I’m glad I followed you…” She drops her stare back to the concrete. “I’d hate for you to do this on your own.”

I’m beginning to wonder if I could’ve done it on my own. The thought of not having Emily down there with me seems…I don’t know…impossible.

“Here we are.” She sighs, pushing on a wire gate that hangs by a quarter of a hinge. It screeches and squeals as it opens and it’s enough to make me reach for my ears to block its sharp sound from piercing my brain.

“This is your place, huh?” Lowering my hands, I glance around. There’s not much to say about it. It’s not the worse place I’ve seen, but once this is over, she’s definitely moving out. There’s no safety, no security—not even a proper fence. Nope. It’s not good enough.

Emily leads me through the building with ease. She’s comfortable with the cracked paint on the walls and the occasional missing tile on the floor. As we walk, I peer down the stark empty halls and blink every time a light bulb flickers. There’s no one to stop us, no one to ask for identification or to find out where we’re going. It sets me on edge. What if we were murderers—of the bad kind? I shudder at the thought. Are there children in this building? If there are, what about them? There are no yards to play in —no grass or wood chipped play spaces.

“You look really disturbed.” Emily comments, pulling me from my own head.

She glances over her shoulder just as I manage to pull my stare from a forensic notice on the door we passed a second ago. I keep my hand tucked firmly against my body as we climb the stairs. I’d rather lick the handrail of the moving sidewalk at the airport than touch this one.

“I am a little.” I admit, peering over the railing of the stairs we climb. I’m not even kidding. There’s pile of rubbish at the bottom “What kind of place is this?”

I don’t want to make her feel bad about where she lives, but come on. This isn’t a home. It’s a fucking dump—no, it’s worse than a dump. It’s a fucking atrocity that needs to be bulldozed.

“It’s home.” She states, her feet slapping the concrete stairs—yes, concrete stairs. Inside a building—with slight aggression. “It’s a little rough around the edges, but it’s the only place I have so…be nice.”

I purse my lips. As the saying goes; ‘if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all.’

At the top of the sixth floor, Emily stalks toward a thin, mahogany plywood door. Taped to the middle of it is an eviction notice. It doesn’t take me much to realize the door is the entrance to her place.

With a heavy exhale and a slump of her shoulders, she exhales. “I guess I should’ve seen this coming. Sorry, Sue.”

I cock an eyebrow. “Sue?”

“She’s the original occupant—my roommate, I guess. She died after I moved in.”

“That sucks.” I scrunch my nose. “She’s not still in there, is she?”

Emily snorts as she tears the paper from the door and scrunches it into a ball. “No.”

“Did you throw her over the railing?”

She sneers at me as her eyes suddenly glow playfully. “I’ll throw you over the railing if you keep making fun of where I live.”

Fair enough. I flash her my palms in defeat. “I won’t say another word about it. Promise.”

Leaning back against the railing, I watch as she shakes the door handle and pushes on the door. It didn’t occur to me until now that we can’t get into her apartment without a key. Shit. I drop my face into my palm and rub at my eyes. I walked all those damn stairs for nothing.

“Have a little faith, Stone.” Emily states with a laugh. “I can get us in.”

I lift my stare in time to see her twist and pull on the handle right before giving the bottom left corner of the door a hard kick. Just like that, the door shoots open and crashes into the wall. Over her shoulder she smirks at me. It’d be extremely sexy if I wasn’t so damn appalled.

“Well?”

“Well, I don’t know if should be impressed that you managed to get the door open or disturbed you lived here in the first place. Christ.” I push off the railing and saunter toward her. “I’m surprised you’re still alive.”

“I’m tougher than I look.” Emily states as she enters her apartment.

Despite myself, I follow closely behind her and I freeze once I’m inside. Instant regret. I’m standing in the kitchen and the bathroom at the same time. Less than four feet away from me is the toilet and no more than ten feet away is a brown raggedy couch, covered in a hideous pink throw rug. The usual ‘girly’ things litter the tiny space. Pink lip gloss tubes and hair pins are scattered over the tiny kitchen bench, an unopened packet of cigarettes sit freely in a busted fruit bowl, and clothes sit in folded piles on the floor in front of the couch.

“Strangely, it doesn’t feel like home anymore.” Emily mutters, her eyes flicking over her belongings.

“Did it in the first place?”

I put my hands on my hips as my gaze settles on an opened box of condoms sitting by the smallest fridge I’ve ever seen. I ignore the dark cloud forming under my ribs. What she does—or did—is none of my business. I look back to Emily as her dark gaze flicks from the packet, then to me, and then to the door behind me.

“You wanna wait—”

“—outside?” I exhale a rush of air I didn’t know I was holding. “Yeah. I’ll give you ten minutes. Then we have to go.”

She nods and I turn and leave the room. Outside her little shoe box I slide down the wall and sit. Though my back complains and my chest aches, my legs burn with relief. I want to stop. I can’t push myself any further. I close my eyes for the briefest second and that’s all my body needs for it to pull me under without a fight.

Emily

My index finger slides over the zero button and, by some miracle, the call connects. A few minutes ago, I decided to put a call through to my hospital. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to let them know what’s going on in my life at the moment. When all this is over I don’t want to have nothing. Nursing is all I got.

I turn my back to the door, hoping it’d block my voice from waking Jai up. I grip the strap of my heavy bag and pull it further onto my shoulder. I packed just about everything I own. One thing more and I’m certain my bag will snap and rip open.

My heart hammers in my chest and the feeling of doing something wrong lingers. I don’t like it…the way it wraps around my ribs and puts pressure on my lungs.

“Hel—”

The line goes dead.

“Hello?” I pull nervously on the long curly cord that sticks out from the hand piece and the severed end of it brushes along the top of my foot, tickling the skin.

Oh shit.

Slowly, knowing very well what’s behind me, I lower the ear piece, and peer over my shoulder. Angry blue eyes meet mine and I swallow hard as heat rushes over the surface of my skin.

“Really? You’re going to make a damn phone call in the middle of the mess we’re in?”

He drops the knife he used to cut the cord and I blink as the metal hits the semi-polished wood.

“It’s to the hospital.”

Jai reaches out and tugs on the cord, pulling the piece from my hand. It crashes to the floor, just missing my toes. “I don’t care who it’s to. No phone calls. We can’t risk it. Not until this is over.”

My eyebrows draw together as I clamp my hands on my hips. “This phone is twenty years old. Can it even be tapped?”

He steps closer in an attempt to intimidate me with his huge frame. “That’s not the point.”

“What is the point?”

“We have to play it safe. Until I’ve found my brother and Skull’s heart ceases to beat we have to lay low.” He holds his hand out for my bag. “We can talk about it later. Give me the bag, I’ll carry it for you. We’ve been here too long.”

With a huff, I slide the bag off my shoulder and put the strap in his hand. He weighs the plain, black bag before slinging it over his shoulder.

“I’m perfectly capable of—”

I stop. Judging by the way Jai’s eyebrows smooth out tells me he can hear it too. Sirens. They’re getting closer. My stomach plummets like a rock.

“Shit.” He swears, raking five stressed fingers through his hair.

I’m frozen, waiting for him to tell me what to do next. Our eyes meet, blue to brown, and I see it immediately. He’s as stuck as I am.

“Jai? What do we do?”

He curses again this time scraping his teeth over his bottom lip in frantic thought. My heart beats faster and faster every extra second he wastes thinking about what to do next.

“Jai?”

“All right. All right. Uh…” He runs his hand from his hair down over his face before expelling a rush of warm air from his lungs. “We gotta stick to the shadows until we find our next car—preferably an old one—one that won’t alert anyone of our presence.”

I nod, breathing way too hard. “That should be easy in this neighborhood.”

“Right.”

His large, warm hand snatches my wrist and he whirls around on his heels, pulling me along behind him. He moves fast, so fast we’re down the stairs and back on the street in no time. The sirens are loud. They ring in my ears, making my brain pulse and press against my skull. The sirens sound like they’re on top of us, but they fail to pierce my ears, telling me they’re on the next street. It’s only a matter of time before they find us hiding in the shadows. With a swift tug on my arm, Jai pulls me behind a large bin. My thighs scream and burn as I crouch low, resting the majority of my body weight against him. I’m not going to last much longer.

“Over there.” He whispers, thrusting out a long, thick arm and a finger to match.

I follow his line of sight to a beat up, pale gray sedan circa nineteen eighty something. Looking at its ratty paint makes me miss the first super-fast, super nice car we stole. This one is the easiest choice, I suppose. The driver’s side window is open a crack, making it all too easy for someone like Jai to break into.

“Come on.”

With quick steps, I follow him across the road. I barely have time to peer around his shoulder before he’s unlocked the car and pulled the passenger door open. He slips my bag off his shoulder and tosses it into the back seat. His blue eyes, black in this light, meet mine when he pulls back and straightens his spine.

“Last leg of the trip. Are you ready?”

“I’m ready.” I say without hesitation.

A strange, dense coil of excitement twirls in my chest. Adventure. The unknown—an unknown without Skull. How can I not be ready? We need to rest, recover and re-evaluate our plan. If I’m lucky Jai will come to his senses. If we couldn’t hurt him underground with next to no men, we sure as hell can’t hurt him out here. Not when he has everyone on his side. And, even if his brother is alive…the chances of him making it to the break of dawn after the stunt we pulled is next to none. Skull will kill Joel and when that happens Jai will be unstoppable. He will be a force as destructive and as terrifying as a tornado raging on the precipice of a hurricane. He will be filled with the unrelenting wrath of an erupting volcano.

And who is going to be able to stop it?

The Lake House

Jai

Honnnnk!!

I jolt awake as my stomach and my heart collide into each other in an attempt to squeeze up my throat. Instinctively, my hands clench the wheel and I jerk it to the side, forcing the car back into its designated lane. Panting, I glance in my side mirror and at the truck travelling in the left lane. The blonde woman behind the wheel flips me off with a shake of her head. I take it like a bitch. Driving when tired is a dangerous game and the amount of micro naps I’ve taken is frightening. Like a game of Russian roulette, it’s only a matter of time before I kill Kitten, myself and a bunch of other innocent people travelling on the same road.

By my calculations we’re an hour from our destination. George Lake. I stayed there during the summer a few times when I was a kid. It’s been fifteen years since we sold the lake house and we haven’t been back. As we were fleeing from the tunnels, I was driving myself insane trying to think of a place to hide until I’m ready to attack again.

Then it hit me.

The lake.

There are loads of houses out there—most unused outside of summer. Since it’s fall now I’m certain a particular lake house will be abandoned until next summer. It belongs to a man named Mr. Dooney. I knew him growing up. Mr. Dooney was a lonely man, getting on in years, and occupied the lake house down the road from ours. The lake house was a gift from a son that he hated, but his wife adored. He wanted to sell it loads of times, but couldn’t because she loved it so much. When his wife passed away he still couldn’t bring himself to get rid of the place. He even stays in it every summer as a tribute to the late Mrs. Dooney.

If life has been kind to him, and he’s still alive, his house will be empty, making it a perfect hideout for me and Emily. No one will find us there…if we’re smart.

Another honk and I jolt awake, unaware that my eyes had closed once again. To my right, a woman thrusts her hand and points to the sleeping child in the back—no older than three. I offer her the best sympathetic look I can muster. It must come off as a scowl because she flips me off straight after.

Flicking my eyes back to the road, I free a hand and run it over my face. I’m not going to make it to the lake. I’d ask Kitten to drive, but I noticed an uneasiness about her when she rides in a car—even a car going at normal speeds. I glance at her, then back to the road. I bet it feels good to sleep. She’s so out of it, she could pass as dead. Her dirty, black hair covers half of her face, and dirt taints her skin. She’s exhausted and looks it, even while resting.

I exhale. It feels never ending. Each mile we travel seemingly stretches into three. I glance at Emily again, then back to the road. Dawn is upon us, brightening the sky with its pale blues and the faintest hint of orange and red along the horizon. Not long until the sun is blazing and Skull begins his hunt—assuming he hasn’t already.

The nagging, stomach turning thought of the pain we’ve brought down on my brother because of our rebellion creeps into my mind, poisoning me with guilt and anger. I quickly push it out, choosing to revisit it once I’m refreshed. A tired man is an irrational one and I can’t afford to be irrational.

Not now.

I have to have a plan. I need to be smart. Only when Joel is safe can I go after Skull with reckless abandon, not caring if I go down in the process. However, in order to make it that far, I mustn’t kill myself on the way to the hideout. I have to make it to the lake alive before I can make Skull feel every slice of pain I want him to feel.

Just to the lake… my eyes grow heavy.

I have to make it to the lake.

***

I could fucking cry. I pull on the parking brake and drop my head against the headrest. I made it. For the one millionth time my eyes threaten to close and this time I let them since it no longer threatens the lives of anyone around me. A fuzziness encases my brain and the bullshit that has followed me through the past few years of my life feels like a distant memory now. All that matters is sleep.

I force my eyes open and lean to the right to catch a glimpse of myself in the rear view mirror. My first thought when I look past the dirt caked onto my skin is: I’m white! I mean, I’ve always been Caucasian, but my skin tone has never resembled the color of milk. For as long as I can remember, my skin has always been a warm tan due to excess time in the sun. Now I look like I’ve never stepped foot outside in my life.

“Relax. There’s not a single scratch on your pretty face.”

I look at Emily. She squints her eyes, thinning them until I can’t see the color of her irises. Her skin has the same white hue as mine—if not whiter. Her black hair, that has become a deep brown around the edges, incandescent in the light of the morning sun, is in tangles, making her look wild and dangerous.

Stretching her long arms above her head and cringing, she smiles at me through the pain.

“I’m digging the cavewoman look.” I say, dragging a hand to my mouth to stifle a yawn. “Have you clubbed any baby animals today?”

She rolls her eyes and the tired bags underneath them become more prominent. “Hilarious.”

Emily takes in the two story lake house in front of us. I watch as her eyes scan every windowsill, door frame and potted plant. “This is it, huh?”

I nod. “Our hideout.”

Her thin, pink lips curl at the corners. “I should flee from mob bosses more often—especially if it pays off like this.”

I reach down and undo my seatbelt. Then I open the door. “Don’t make it a habit, Kitten. The last thing I want is for you to end up face down in a ditch somewhere.”

I groan as I swing my legs out of the car. My muscles are done. After remaining stagnant for the entire drive here, they’ve gone to sleep and are stuck in a permanently hard state. Behind me, I hear Emily groan and swear too. I can see the remainder of the day being lost to sleep, but first, I have to dispose of the car. Someone would have reported it stolen by now.

I push myself up and out of the car. The first thing I spot is the glistening lake at the back of the house. The perfect spot to sink a car.

“How’d you make it across the thruway?” Emily asks, as she hobbles up beside me.

“This car has a tag, can you believe it?”

“Really? Shit. That’s lucky.”

I tune her out as she talks and I scan the area for something heavy, something I can put in the trunk. The car itself will fill with water and sink, but you never know how strong a current can be until it washes the car up somewhere down the river. I don’t want to take any chances while we’re in the area. My stare stops at a tall pile of old bricks stacked against the left flank of the house. Enough of those and the car should stay at the bottom of the lake for a long time—possibly forever.

“…and I don’t understand—”

“There.” I state, cutting her off. “Bricks. They’ll do just fine.”

I look at her and she blinks her large eyes at me, confused. “For what?”

I smirk. For a girl from the streets, you’d think she’d put two and two together. “For sinking the car.”

Emily

Large pockets of air bubble along the surface of the lake, creating ripples as far as I can see. With one last, large ‘gloop’ the roof of the car disappears from sight. I’ve never had to sink a car before. It’s kind of fun.

Pulling my bag higher on his shoulder, Jai exhales and turns around to face the house. I watch the lake for a little while longer. I haven’t spent much time out of the city. To see colors other than the ones that paint the surface of dull metals, rust and dirty glass is refreshing.

Greens.

Reds.

Oranges.

Being stuck underground makes you miss the things you never really thought about before. Like colors. Never have I appreciated mustard yellow before.

“How does a hot shower sound?” Jai asks.

My knees tremble, weakening at the word. It carries an orgasmic tune, if that’s possible. I turn to face him.

“How hot are we talking?”

His dry lips quirk at the corners, darkening the rings around his eyes.

“Red skin, thick steam and wet walls kind of hot.”

A dreamy sigh lets itself out of my throat. “I don’t even know what that feels like anymore.”

He flicks his head towards the large house. “Let’s go find out.”

I follow him as he makes his way toward the pretty wooden porch. White and turquoise pots hang from polished chains. Thick ropes of green vines with cream flowers spill over the round edges. They’re definitely not the kind of flowers I would expect Jai to have.

The floorboards creak underneath our feet, sending a shiver down my spine. Two white, wicker rocking chairs sway gently in the cool fall air and then it hits me.

“This isn’t your place, is it?”

Jai laughs as he drops my bag to the floor and reaches over his head, gripping the collar of his filthy, green shirt. “You think I’d hide us in a place that I own? No. Those places will be the first to be hit by Skull.”

Places? He has more than one?

I fold my arms across my chest. “I can’t take someone else’s home.”

He pulls the shirt off over his head, exposing his glistening torso. “This house is vacant until the summer. No one will know we’re here.”

I take a slight step to the left as he cocks his arm back and sends his fist crashing into the glass. It shatters with a loud crack and large, pointy, skin piercing shards drop to the floor. It doesn’t feel right—the heaviness on my chest. I don’t feel comfortable taking someone else’s home, even if they do only use it in the summer. I watch, quietly—uncertainly—as Jai carefully reaches in past the glass and unlocks the door. He tugs on the door handle and it opens with a screech.

“It’s not right…” I mutter.

Jai steps aside, holding the door open for me, I meet his stare. He looks painfully tired. Amongst it is a hint of concern—or irritation. I can’t tell under the layer of dirt on his face.

“Right or wrong what choice do you have, Emily?”

I swallow. I guess he’s right. Now is not the time for an attack of morality. I have plenty of time to feel guilty once this over and I’m not being hunted by a mad man.

I suck in air and then expel it before slipping by him and entering the house.

Recovery

Jai

Steam billows from the unclosed bathroom door, followed by a womanly sigh. I smile. I don’t think she’s ever stayed in a room that has a bathroom connected to it before. I glance down at the handgun I’m carrying and swiftly tuck it into the back of my towel.

After I’d showered and thrown my clothes in the washing machine, Emily called out for me. Over a roaring shower and through foggy glass, she told me her bathroom didn’t have any towels. So, holding my own damp towel around my hips, I rushed down stairs to the towel cupboard to get her one…and that’s where I found the guns. I pulled on a floral towel wedged at the bottom of the stack. When I finally got it free, my elbow snapped back, hitting the side wall of the cupboard. Aside from the obvious large crack I noticed the wall was hollow. Sure enough, I pulled open the panel and there they were—two handguns, a shotgun and a rifle. Most people would cower at the sight of the aggressive hunks of metal, but I revel in it. It’s a welcome discovery considering our situation.

I tuck the handgun further under my towel until the cool handle is the only part of it touching my lower back. Since there’s no telling how long we’re going to go undiscovered here it’s a good idea to stay vigilant—even if that means carrying a gun while wearing nothing but a towel.

I push open the bathroom door and step inside. The hot, wet steam envelops my body and clings to my skin.

“Here’s your towel.” I call out. “Do you need body wash? Shampoo?”

“No. I found some under the sink.”

I turn and head for the door.

“Wait.”

My stomach does a barrel roll. Stopping, I look over my shoulder. Her hand rubs at the glass, exposing her pink face and slicked hair. Most of it sticks to her skull, but the thinnest strand of it is caught on her cheekbone.

“Are you going to sleep?”

Unintentionally, my eyebrows furrow. “That’s the plan.”

“Alone? In your own room?”

I nod.

Alone.

In my own room.

It almost sounds intimidating like that…has a few weeks really made us that dependent on each other? Like young children attached to their mother?

“I’ll be in the room downstairs, by the front door…if you need me.”

Emily glances down—a shy movement I’ve never seen her do before. A second later, the glass in front of her face becomes unclear once more. The only thing still visible is the pink in her skin. Her eyes are on me, I can feel them, but she doesn’t speak…

So I leave.

I want to stay. I want to ask her what she wants…but I don’t.

Because I’m a pussy.

Because the thought of hearing her tell me she wants me to share a bed with her absolutely terrifies me. It makes it real. It was one thing being stuck in a tiny hole in a wall with her. We had no choice outside of each other for company. It’s another thing entirely to do the same out here in the real world. If we start something, how does it end? Would it end? I don’t know how to answer that. One thing I know for certain is; the possible romantic relationship budding between Kitten and me is a bad idea and for three major reasons. One: distractions in this revenge business are fucking dangerous. Two: how can I save my brother when my brain and my heart are focused on keeping her safe too? I don’t have the strength to keep two people alive. Three: I’ve never invested myself in another human being romantically before—and it’s not because I don’t want. I do…I’ve just never felt a connection on a level that runs deeper than the physical aspect of a relationship.

Only one girl has caused fire to flow in place of my blood and my bones to ache under my skin.

And she’s showering upstairs. Alone.

I drag my feet over the beige runner in the hall, ten feet away from my room. When I get there, I grip the metal door knob in my hand, turn it, and push it open. It’s empty, void of any other furnishings except a double bed and a wooden night stand. I crinkle my nose as a distinct storage smell tickles my nostrils. It smells nothing like the sweet berry and clean flesh that fills Kitten’s room.

I force out a heavy exhale and, with heavy feet, I carry myself over to the blanket-less bed. I’ve spent so long sleeping with her on me or next to me, do I even know how to sleep by myself anymore?

I pull my gun from my towel and sit it on the wooden bedside table. On the surface is a red wine stain from the bottom of a glass.

Exhaustedly, I run my hands over my face and drop onto the bed.

I hate it.

It’s too soft, too empty.

“Fuck.” I swear under my breath.

Am I too tired? My chest tightens, squeezing me with its anger. I want to sleep! Is that so fucking hard? I push myself back onto my feet and storm from the room.

“Unh.” I run into Emily with a grunt in the hall.

Clenching her towel hard against her chest, Emily gasps and I take a step back.

“Jesus. You scared me.” She says, her voice soft underneath her heavy breathing.

“Sorry.”

I rake my fingers through my hair as her large, doe eyes divert from my face and scan awkwardly over the old photographs in the hallway. Diamond-like drops of water fall from the tips of her hair and roll down her milky, porcelain skin before disappearing between her breasts. If I wasn’t so tired, I’d moisten my suddenly dry mouth by collecting the drops off her wet skin with my tongue. Fuck yes I would. She looks different—almost an entirely different person. In this light, I see a sparse spattering of light, caramel freckles over her cheeks and golden flecks of light floating in her chocolate eyes. They’re mesmerizing.

“Don’t like your room?” I ask.

I know. I want to kick my own ass.

Her bright brown irises meet mine. “I like it just fine…”

“But?”

Say it. Say it so I don’t have to.

“But there’s something missing.”

I open my mouth, but Kitten cuts me off in a flurry of embarrassment. A pink hue spreads from her wet chest, up her neck and nestles in her cheeks.

“I’m sorry. This is stupid. I’m a grown woman…I should be able to sleep on my own.”

She goes to turn away from me, but I snatch her wrist before she’s able to complete the turn and take a single step away. I don’t like her far…I like her close. Close enough to smell. Close enough to touch.

The tips of her ears are red too, a testament to just how embarrassed she feels.

“You want to sleep with me?”

Her brown eyes meet mine. Uncertainty is there. Fear is there. There’s also a flood of relief. Why are the two of us acting like dependent children? I have no fucking idea.

“Just this once.” She states, a blatant lie falling from her tongue.

A beautiful, enticing lie. Just this once. How can I dispute that? I want it too. I’m dead tired, but I know I won’t sleep peacefully alone.

Turning on my heel, I pull her into the bedroom and over to the bed. Choosing the left side, Emily clenches her towel to her body and climbs onto the bed. As I sit down, she digs her knees into the mattress.

“Ugh. It’s so soft.” In unison, our exhausted voices tangle, her light tenor complementing my deep.

“Who would’ve thought you’d miss lying on those uncomfortable mesh cots, huh?” I say.

Kitten smiles before dropping her head against the pillow, the side of her body resting flush against the mattress. She tucks her hand under her cheek and suddenly, the bed looks like it’s the most comfortable bed in the world. Her face, beautiful deep brown eyes, and the sweet, subtle curve to her lips could sell a mattress with busted springs to the person who threw it away in the first place. If I wasn’t so tired…the things I would do…

But I am tired and this isn’t peacetime. I need to be alert—as alert as humanly possible. Our lives depend on it.

Lying down on my back, I tuck one arm under my head and let the other fall to my side. Without prompting, my heavy eyelids drop shut and the last thing I feel before a black oblivion claims me are warm, soft fingertips as they glide down the inside of my wrist and into the palm of my hand.

***

“Aaaahh!”

Panic electrocutes my system, jolting me awake. What the fuck? I barely have time to register if my eyes are open before I reach for my gun and dart out of bed. With an outstretched arm and a twitch in my trigger finger, I check all corners of the room with the point of my gun. It’s as empty as it was when we fell asleep. I look for Kitten and find her wide eyed and worried, clenching her heaving chest sitting in a heap on the floor.

“What is it?” I pant. “What’s wrong?”

It’s dark—eight o’clock maybe. If it weren’t for the light of the moon filtering in through the window I wouldn’t be able to see a thing.

“Uh,” She swallows hard as her body quakes with an obvious shiver. “A spider. It ran across my shoulder.”

She rakes five anxious fingers through her hair and I lower the gun. Guns make her nervous. Guns make most people nervous. Not me. If a fair chunk of time passes by and I haven’t fired a gun, I get withdrawals. I need to hold a gun. I need to feel the weight in my palm and the metal against my skin. The way the air smells after a gun has been fired and the way it vibrates through my flesh, turning my blood into hundreds of tiny ripples. Yeah, there’s nothing like it.

“A spider?” I repeat, unconvinced.

She nods quickly and with a hard swallow. “I’m gonna get dressed. Maybe get some air.”

Emily is pale, paler than she’s supposed to be, and I’ll bet my life savings that it wasn’t a spider. I’ve seen where she lives. I’m sure a spider isn’t a freak occurrence.

Gathering her towel around her body, she leaves room.

The Dock

Emily

With a shiver I pull the blue knitted blanket I found on the couch around my shoulders and sit down on the edge of the dock. As soon as I stepped out into the freezing night air I realized it was way too cold to be out of the house—and especially too cold to be sitting over the water on a rickety old dock—but it’s the only place I can get maximum fresh, crisp, clean, cold air on my face.

I lied earlier. A spider never ran over my shoulder and I think Jai knows it. What kind of grown woman has nightmares? What adult wakes up screaming? As soon as I saw the panic on Jai’s face when he sprung out of bed and watched it morph into confusion when he realized nothing was happening, I knew I had to lie to him. I don’t want him to see me as weak…I don’t want him to see me as someone he has to protect. I know I’ve seen some shit. I’ve seen throats spill blood as they were sliced open and I’ve seen bodies get absolutely pummeled. I’ve smelt death…I’ve touched it.

Skull.

Every time I close my eyes I see that skull tattooed so menacingly into his face. In my dreams I feel his murderous hands on me, grabbing and squeezing whatever they want, and I smell his expensive cologne, mixed with the musky scents of mold, rust and blood. If he finds us…what will he do? If, by some miracle, he has kept Jai’s brother alive what has he been doing to him this whole time?

“Emily?”

I gasp as my heart jumps into my throat. Somehow, I manage to keep it down. Internal actions are easy to hide, but my external ones betray me.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.” Jai’s voice echoes over the still water.

“You didn’t scare me.” I state, ashamed of the defensive tone my voice takes on.

“All right.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I see his bare feet as he stops beside me. His calf muscle tremors and I follow it up his leg until it disappears under his now dry and clean shorts. A second later, it hits his spine and his whole body jolts with a shiver.

“You want in?” I ask, opening my blanket with a sniffle as the cold makes my nose run.

“I was kinda hoping you weren’t planning on staying out here too long and we can go back to bed.”

I smirk. Bed sounds nice and snuggling sounds better, but there’s no way I’m going back to sleep—not after sleeping all day and especially not after the nightmare I had. No way. It’s the kind of nightmare you can’t shake. The kind that follows you into your waking life.

When Jai sees I’m not going anywhere, he exhales heavily, his breath visible as it swirls through the night air.

“I’ll sit with you.”

I shiver violently as a cold whoosh of air blows across the back of my neck. Though it was humid underground, it’s freaking cold up top. Luckily, I packed some longer, warmer clothes. Jai doesn’t own anything besides his black shorts and green t-shirt. I feel bad for the guy. It’s damn cold.

Jai sits beside me and his hard, toned body rests against mine as he wraps the large blanket around us, blocking the cold air from hitting anywhere but out faces. I sniffle again.

“You wanna talk about it?” He asks, his stare cast out over the lake.

“About what? The spider?”

His head snaps in my direction and his dark eyes bear down on me. Who am I kidding? I’m a fucking sheet of glass when it comes to him. It’s scary that someone, who is virtually a stranger, can see straight through me. I guess what’s more unnerving is the fact someone finally wants to.

“Cut the bullshit, Emily. I’ve seen where you live so it’s obvious spiders aren’t a problem for you.”

Ass.

He takes a slight pause. “What’d you dream about?”

Just like that, he sees through my charade and cracks me open like a coconut.

“What makes you think it was a dream?”

A friendly smile curves his lips. “Tell me it wasn’t and I’ll drop the subject.”

I shiver. “It wasn’t.”

Jai chuckles and the beautiful, throaty sound echoes around me. I fucking love the sound. It fills me with an insane urge to kiss him.

“Okay. Now say it with absolute honesty.” His smile falls away and his face becomes serious.

Strangely enough, the slightest, pleading curve softens his eyes.

“Don’t lie to me, Kitten.”

“Why is it so important to you? Why do you want to know what’s going on in my head? Most people run at the thought of a meaningful conversation, but not you.”

“Because I care about you.” He responds without a single moment of hesitation. “Because you’re family.”

My heart swells dramatically and presses against my lungs. In turn, they crush themselves against my ribcage and force excess saliva up my throat, creating a lump I can’t swallow. If that isn’t bad enough, my tear ducts begin to stir…which is fucking weird. I hate crying, especially in front of him. I’m staring and my mouth is agape with the slightest part.

“Well," I say. "Maybe not. I mean, you don’t fuck your family.”

I cringe. Instead of thanking him for including me in his family, like a normal person would, I’ve gone and said something stupid. Jai chokes on a laugh and it’s a genuine, beautiful sound.

“Jesus Christ. You couldn’t just smile and say thank you?”

“I’m sorry!” I laugh, my cheeks burning with heat to rival the sun. “Thank you. That’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

He snorts. “I doubt that.”

“Why?”

“You might not have had any family growing up, but surely you had friends—boyfriends. I bet they’ve said some nice things.”

Thinking back on my life, I can’t remember a single time someone has said something so kind to me. In high school I was bullied for being a homeless, parentless loser. At work, the other students were assholes and the doctors fucked the nurses with the pretty blonde hair and shiny lips while I had my lubed, gloved hand shoved up someone’s ass. The closest I’ve come to being told nice things before I met Jai was the nameless, passionless men I’d slept with…and I don’t think compliments on my tits, ass and pussy count.

“No.” I utter as the sad realization hits me. “You’re the nicest person I’ve ever met…which is weird because you can be kind of a dick.”

I notice the look on his face then—a look I’ve seen a million times.

And I hate it.

Scoffing, I look out over the lake. “Don’t give me that look. I don’t need you to feel sorry for me. I did just fine without the fake niceness and awkward compliments.”

“I don’t feel sorry for you.”

I roll my eyes. “Yeah, okay.”

His large, semi-warm fingers slide underneath my chin and guide my face back in his direction.

“I don’t feel sorry for you. I feel sorry for them.”

I swallow hard as he maintains his fierce eye contact. His breath is warm on the tip of my nose for a second before the cold air chills it.

“No one has ever commented on the golden specks in your eyes? The light spattering of caramel freckles on your cheeks?”

Ever so slightly, I shake my head.

“Not your lips?”

Again, I shake my head and that’s when I notice the nervousness in my chest and the tremble of anticipation in the tips of my fingers. I’ve never felt like this before…I’ve never felt like I need a moment to be perfect, but this…please, God, let this be a perfect moment. I want to commit it to memory forever because if I never have another moment like this, if all the encounters I have later in life crash and burn into a ball of disastrous flames, I’ll always have this moment to fall back on.

One perfect moment to last a lifetime.

“You’re lying.” He whispers, his voice almost carried away by the wind.

His face is an inch away from mine. His breath warming my lips now instead of my nose. I’m not cold anymore. I’m on fire…a metaphoric fire of the highest intensity and it’s burning me from the inside out.

“I promise you, I’m not lying.”

A deafening silence falls. The only thing I hear I the wind blowing past my ears. A million and one emotions fly between us and neither of us has a handle on them. Oh, how much destruction they could cause if we don’t reign them in right now.

“Idiots.” He spits out…and then I can’t breathe.

His mouth claims mine in a way that is so sinfully intimate. My heart pounds in my chest, my skin prickles with a million and one bumps and, oh fucking hell, he tastes good. My body aches all over from the running, but he turns the pain into a dull ache.

Then the pain returns and I barely have time to register the sudden absence of his lips before the cold air rushes in and sticks to my skin, sobering me up completely. The blanket falls from my body, allowing the icy breeze to drape over me. With an aggressive ‘fuck’ Jai is on his feet.

“Jeez, I’m not that bad a kisser.”

He begins to pace—back and forth—while raking his fingers through his dark, unruly hair.

“It’s not you—fuck!” He crouches low, covering his mouth with his hand. “How could I be so damn stupid?”

I grab the blanket and pull it up over my shoulders, holding it tightly against my chest. “You’re not very convincing.”

He exhales with a heavy blow. “It’s Jessica. She’s in the city staying with a family friend.” He stands up. “I gotta go.”

Jessica? His sister? Panic rises like fire in the pit of my stomach, but for the wrong reasons.

“Go? Go where?”

I should be concerned for his sister, but I’m more worried about being left alone. The wooden planks vibrate under my ass as Jai storms up the dock.

"Jai?" I scramble to my feet. “Where are you going?”

“To make a phone call.”

“So use a phone here." I call out. "I saw two when we arrived.”

“Can’t.” He shouts over his shoulder. “I cut the cables.”

I stop and slump in defeat. Of course he cut the cables.

Family First

Jai

I slip into a tight pair of runners, ignoring the look of panic on Kitten’s face as she leans against the wall opposite me. I don’t want to leave her here alone, but I don’t have a choice. She’s safer here. I’ve stupidly risked my sister’s life without a second thought. I won’t risk Emily’s too.

The plan is to find a payphone in the next town and call Jessica from there. Even if it’s traced, and I highly doubt it will be, they won’t have our exact location. It’s unlikely Skull would go out of his way to track us via telephone, but I wouldn’t put it past him. He’s a crazy motherfucker with too many contacts.

Before I dropped Jessica off with Talia, my mother’s cousin, I gave her a credit card to use in case of an emergency. I think Skull hunting me down like a dog counts as an emergency. It’s only a matter of time before he gets tired of chasing me and decides to use someone I love to bring me to him. Jess and Talia need to get on the next plane out of the country and fast.

I still can’t believe I forgot about my little sister. There’s a dense feeling in my chest…it mimics the panic you might feel when you leave your house and realize an hour later you might have left the iron on. Only it’s so. Much. Worse.

If I had food in my stomach, I’d probably throw it up.

“There’s a car in the garage. I’ll take that and be back here by morning.”

I don’t make eye contact as I step past her and reach for the plain set of keys hanging on the wall beside her head.

“Morning?” She mutters. “That long?”

Closing my fist with the keys inside, I finally make eye contact. The rims of her eyes are red. Her body wants to cry, but she won’t let it.

“You’ll be fine, Kitten. I’ll be back in no time and I’ll bring food.”

Tucking her hair behind her ear, she swallows hard. I wish there was something I could say to comfort her, but there isn’t and I don’t have the capacity to put someone else first at the moment. All I care about at this point in time is getting my little sister to safety. The rest I can deal with later.

“Here.” I state, reaching under my shirt for the gun.

I snatch Emily’s wrist and press the handle of it into the palm of her hand.

“I’ll knock four times. FOUR, Emily. Any more or any less I want you to shoot, okay?”

Her chocolate eyes widen. “No—but—I can’t…I’ve never—”

“There’s nothing to it. Just aim and squeeze. That’s all.”

She tries to pull away, but I tighten my grip on her tiny, fragile wrist.

“Jai—”

“Listen to me.” I snap.

“No—”

“Emily! Listen. To. Me.”

She stops trying to pull herself from my grip and though her limbs slow, her chest doesn’t. It rises and falls at a rapid pace. Like a frightened little rabbit.

“If you want to survive—if you want to avoid living and dying at the mercy of Skull—you will do exactly as I say.”

Emily glances at the gun, seemingly thinking long and hard, before finally curling her slender fingers around the handle. I release it, allowing her to feel its full weight.

“I’ll be back by morning.” I repeat. “I will knock—”

“Four times.” She cuts in. “Any more or any less I shoot. Got it.”

She avoids my eyes and I hate it. The look of nervousness on her face makes me feel queasy—more so than I already do.

“Don’t shoot yourself.” I tell her, an attempt at humor. “I don’t want to come back and find I have to take you to the E.R because you’ve shot yourself in the foot.”

A pale shade of green floods her face and the grip she has on the gun noticeably lightens. Stepping away from me, she walks over to the kitchen bench and places the gun on the wooden countertop.

“Good thinking.”

She smiles only to catch it under her top row of teeth a second later. She rakes them over her lip. No more smile. An anxious tapping fills the air as she drums the tips of her fingers on the countertop.

“You promise you’ll come back?”

I glance at the keys in my hands and promise myself that no matter what I hear—no matter what I don’t find or do find when I call my sister, I will come back for Kitten…but if I hear anything less than Jessica’s sarcastic, teenage voice through the receiver I will go straight back out and I will storm the little castle Skull has made for himself and slaughter the lot of them. A death for every sibling he has taken from me and a death for every bout of hopelessness and sorrow he has made me feel. I won’t rest until Skull is thrust from this world and the next. Even Hell is too good for scum like him.

I look up at Emily and the cute lip she anxiously chews on.

“I promise.” I say.

She blows out a subtle exhale, relieved. Does she seriously think I’d leave her behind?

“I can’t do this without my sidekick.” I tell her and a single laugh falls from her mouth as I turn and walk toward the front door.

Beside the flimsy wooden entrance is a door that gives access to the garage. I’m not going to lie, I’m a little disappointed when I open it and see a black Toyota Corolla. I guess it’s a little farfetched to expect a large SUV with black-out bullet proof windows. I hit a button on the key and the car flashes to life. I waste no time getting into the car and turning it on. Thankfully, the gas indicator rises to over half way. I don’t know how far the next town is, but surely I have enough gas to get me there and back. I adjust my seat, pushing it back to allow more room for my legs. When I’m comfortable, a tapping at the window draws my attention. I hit a button and lower the glass.

“Can you pick up some ice-cream?” Emily asks, bending low to peer into the car.

I laugh. “You want ice-cream? Tonight? In this weather?”

Emily nods, smiling brightly. “Ice-cream is my favorite food.”

I reach for my seatbelt and pull it around me. “Impossible.”

It clicks in with ease.

“How so?”

“Ice-cream isn’t food.”

I look back to her. Am I seriously having this conversation right now? With an adult?

“It goes in my mouth so it’s food.”

Oh the responses I have for that. At least three of them slip to the front of my mind and linger on the tip of my tongue, but I don’t dare let them seep through my lips.

“Fine.” I say, trying hard not to let my mind wander. “I’ll get some ice-cream.”

“Oh, really?” Emily simpers, one of her eyebrows cocked in amusement. “Tell me, do you have any money?”

I open my mouth to respond…then I realize I left all my stuff in the tunnels. Thousands of dollars…gone. I didn’t even think of money when I offered to bring back food. I’ve never not had money.

“Shit!” I swear, slapping the wheel.

I drop my forehead against it.

Money. You think I’d remember something as critical as that. Emily’s warm hand brush along my bicep, pulling me from my thoughts.

“Relax.” She says, a hint of laughter in her voice. “I have money.”

Frowning, I lift my head. Sure enough, she extends a small roll of cash pinched between her thumb and index finger.

“It’s not much, but it should cover food.”

I hesitate before taking it from her and slipping it into my pocket. “Where’d you get it?”

“I have a small jar at home where I keep money in. Every now and then I have a spare dollar. That’s where it goes.”

So damn cute. I smile at her, unable to help myself. “What are you saving up for?”

She shrugs. “Nothing in particular…maybe an ice cream on a hot summer’s day or a new pair of shoes if mine wear out.”

It’s amazing how simplicity works—how they vary from person to person. I’ve never had to save a day in my life. I’ve always had money on hand, but Emily is the complete opposite. Every dollar she’s spent has been planned and saved.

“Why are you staring at me like that?” She asks and I hear the anxiety in her tone—the defensiveness. Her brows furrow and her jaw tightens.

Because I think you’re just about the sweetest human being on the planet.

She hates when anyone feels sorry for her and the life she’s lived so far. I don’t blame her. Kitten has fought hard to get where she is. Her strength and her accomplishments are nothing short of amazing. Fuck anyone for feeling sorry for her and fuck me for thinking she’s some stray that needs to be saved. The girl is strong. She’s a woman who doesn’t need a hero. She’s a woman who can take care of herself.

I shake my head. “No reason…what flavor ice cream do you like?”

Just like that, her defensive exterior melts away and a smile curves her pretty lips. “Vanilla—no chocolate—wait. Maybe Strawberry. Oh, but I do love chocolate.”

I blink. Well that has to be the most confusing thing I’ve ever heard. I frown.

“Okay…so chocolate?”

Emily tightly folds her arms over her chest and rakes her teeth across her bottom lip. “Sure, chocolate is good.”

“Are you sure? ‘Cause I kind of get the feeling it’ll be the end of the world if I get the wrong flavor.”

She grins and it’s contagious. “You know what? Why don’t you pick the flavor? That’ll take all the pressure off of me.”

“Are you sure?” I ask again.

She steps away from the car. “Yes, I’m sure. I’ll see you when you get back.”

I nod and smile. “Okay. I’ll see you then.”

I glance down at the gear shift for a moment before I feel her fingers lightly press against my forearm. I whip my head back in her direction and pleading brown eyes are all I see.

“Don’t be too long, okay?”

There’s a certain beauty in vulnerability you can’t witness anywhere else. Her vulnerability speaks volumes to me. It makes my chest do strange things like turn blood vessels into fluttering butterflies.

“Okay.”

Her fingers linger for a short while longer and I let them. I even contemplate covering her hand with my own, but I don’t.

A split second later she pulls away and I pull the gear shift into drive. I fumble with the keys in the ignition before finding the button that opens the garage. With loud creaks and the sound of a whirring motor, it opens and I drive out. I peer in the rear view mirror as I drive down the rocky driveway and see Kitten standing there, nervously chewing her fingers. I watch her for all of about three seconds before I press the garage button again and the door slowly drops shut. I hate leaving her alone, but I can’t risk being out and about with her. I close my window and grip the wheel tightly in my hands. I’ll need to be extra careful…if I’m caught they’ll trace the car right back to the lake house and catch Kitten. In any other situation I would never risk it like this, but I’d die before I let anything happen to my little sister.

She is the only thing I have left of my family. And I will take on all of New York to keep her safe.

***

There’s a tremble in my fingertips that I can’t stop. It causes me to hit the wrong buttons on the damn payphone and I have to start over again. Eventually, I get it right. The first time, it rings out. Words can’t explain the dread in my chest or the way anxiety restricts my lungs from fully expanding. Since I’m stubborn, I try again. Each number I press is a confirmed bullet in Skull’s face.

Ring, ring.

Ring, ring.

Ring, ring.

I close my eyes and pray to a God I’m not even sure exists for Jessica to pick up her phone. I know I dialed the right number. It’s a number I’ve used a million times since becoming her sole provider.

By some miracle, she finally answers. “Hello?”

My eyes shoot open as rave music filters in through the earpiece. A party. Of course she is. I guess Talia is as good at keeping her on the straight and narrow as I am.

“Jessica?”

The music slowly fades as she undoubtedly slips into a quieter room. “Jai? Is that you?”

I smile as relief floods me. The stress headache that ruthlessly squeezed my brain a second ago releases its grip and fades into nothing. To hear her voice… I can’t even explain it.

“Yeah, it’s me.”

“Oh my gosh. Are you okay? Where have you been?”

Out of the corner of my eye, I spot a police officer strolling down the sidewalk. I dip my head and turn my back to him. My heart smashes into my ribcage. He can probably smell the anxiety on me.

“Jessica, listen. I can’t talk long. I need you to grab Talia and get out of the country.”

“Jai—”

“—please, I am begging you to listen to me just this once. Forget your friends. Forget your plans. You need to get out as soon as you can.”

I pause as the officer passes directly behind me, whistling a merry tune. I don’t realize I’m holding my breath until my lungs begin to burn.

“Is this about Joel? You’ve found him?”

The excitement in her voice is like fingernails on a blackboard…because I’m a fucking failure. I exhale.

“No—yes—almost. Just grab Talia and go, all right?”

“All right.” She answer immediately. No bitchiness. No teenage attitude. “I trust you.”

I close my eyes. Thank God.

“Where do we go?” She asks. “What do we do? Will I ever see you again? You’re not giving me much to work with.”

“Go to Italy.” I say. It’s the first city that pops into my head. “Get a tan, do some shopping, and relax. I’ll meet you there once I’m finished.”

Jessica blurts out questions one after the other. Questions I don’t have answers for. Where is Joel? Is he alive? Are you okay? Where have you been? When will you come home? Will I ever see you again?

“I love you, Jess, all right?” I cut in, stopping her questions before she realizes I don’t have the answers.

“Don’t say it like that.”

I cringe at her tone…the way it chokes her up…I hate it.

“I gotta go. Get on a plane and I’ll come find you when I’m finished.”

“Jai—”

I hang up the phone and drop my head against the metal box. It’s as cold as ice. It’s cold enough to give me brain freeze from the outside. I pull away and stare at the little silver numbers. Ten more digits pop up in my mind. Ten digits that form the cell number of a guy I worked with.

Ted Gile.

He was the realest guy in the precinct. He was someone I could trust—the only person who had my back when I was suspended. I lift the handpiece, hit the first three digits and pause. If he’s become one of them, if he’s been sucked in by the corruption, then I could end up regretting this…but if he hasn’t, if he can provide me with some information to help me find Joel, then it’s a call I’m going to wish I made sooner. Holding my breath, I pound out the last seven digits and bring the phone to my ear.

Please don’t let this come back to fuck me in the ass.

***

I watch him from the shadows as he leans against his car, his long arms folded tightly over his chest. I don’t like that he’s come in uniform. It puts me on edge. I’ve made him wait there in the empty parking lot outside of the convenience store for thirty minutes so far. There’s no telltale sign of him betraying me. No shifty glances over his shoulder or dodgy phone calls so I bite the bullet.

I step out from the shadow of the metal stairs that cling to the side of the commercial building, clenching my jaw so my teeth don’t chatter from the cold.

He spots me immediately and pushes off the car. “Well, holy shit. You are alive. Some assholes down at precinct owe me a lot of money. “

He beams widely, his dark lips splitting to reveal bright white teeth. Ted. Ted-fucking-Gile. He stretches his hand to me and I slip mine in his. He grips it tightly, pulling me in for a quick hug.

“It’s been a while, man.” I say, slapping him on the back.

He lets me go and leans against his car. Though I saw him a little over a month ago, he’s changed in appearance. His tall, dark body is harder, his muscles more prominent. Though he’s five years my senior, his face is soft and youthful. I probably look like an old man with the amount of stress I’ve endured since I saw him last.

“Word on the street is you pissed off a very important, very dangerous person.”

I roll my eyes. Twenty-four hours and already the entire NYPD knows what I’ve done? Corrupt motherfuckers. The lot of them.

“You know me, Ted. I piss off just about everyone.”

He chuckles and nods. “You never know when to stop, do you? You weren’t happy with pissing off the entire New York police force you just had to go and piss off the bad guys too?”

Ted knows better than anyone why I did what I did.

“I’m doing what I have to do.”

“I know.” His dark, chocolate eyes narrow in on me. “Is that why you called me?”

I nod. Ted shakes his head and adjusts his stance, widening his legs. “The NYPD doesn’t know anything. You were there when the commissioner handed the case over to the higher ups. I’m sorry, but I can’t help you, brother.”

He thinks it’s that simple? That it’s over because someone else’s organization has taken over the case? I step closer to him.

“Oh, but you can. The FBI, Special Task Force and SWAT are all working under your roof. The precinct is crawling with information that can help me…information I’m sure you can get access to.”

Ted’s jaw clenches. I’m pushing him out of his comfort zone. I wouldn’t normally put so much pressure on someone, but this isn’t a normal circumstance. I won’t get the information I need without applying a little pressure.

“Jai, I can get into a lot trouble.”

“I wouldn’t ask you if I wasn’t desperate.”

He shakes his head and I exhale. There’s an incident I remember and I didn’t want to use it against him, but he’s giving me no choice.

“Do you remember the time—”

Ted pushes off the car, his six foot four frame towering over me. “Oh, hell no. You can’t use that against me, man.”

“—you shot that poor old ladies dog?”

He snarls at me, but I don’t flinch. It’ll take a hell of a lot more than his height to intimidate me.

“He was fucking huge and he was vicious!”

“You shot it.” I push forward. “And I covered your ass when that woman wanted your badge on her mantel piece next to her dog’s ashes.”

Ted turns away from me, running his hands over his head. Last time I saw him, his hair stood two inches off his skull. Now it clings tightly to it. A buzz cut like his girlfriend always wanted.

“You can’t do anything with that information. No one will believe you now.”

I frown. “I don’t want to use the information against you, I just want you to remember that I was there for you when you needed it and all I ask is that you do the same for me. If not, if you can’t help me, forget I said anything and forget I called you here tonight. I’ll do it on my own.”

He doesn’t turn to face me and I don’t expect him to. I’m asking a lot of him—more than I have the right to. I know the last thing I should be doing is pulling another innocent into my mess, but I need him. I need someone I can trust that has access to new information.

A small eternity passes and I turn away from Ted with my answer.

I’m on my own.

The third step I take echoes in my head and I slump my shoulders. Where the fuck do I go from here?

“Who’s the girl you’re with?” He calls after me and I stop dead in my tracks.

My blood runs cold, chilling me down to my bones. Slowly, I turn around. Where’d he get that information from?

“What girl?”

Surprisingly, my voice sounds detached. Good. No one can know about Emily.

He stuffs his hands into his pockets. “I might have dug around a little, looking for your ass. Word is you took off with Skull’s girl.”

I scoff, unable to hide a sneer. I feel it contort my face. “Skull’s girl? She’s not his.”

Ted raises his eyebrows and I clench my jaw until my teeth ache. Fuck.

“So there is a girl?”

Since I’ve already fucked myself, I say: “She has nothing to do with anything She wound up down there by accident—an innocent in every sense of the word.”

“He’s looking for her, Stone. He’s posted a fuckload of money on her being returned to him…alive.”

I plant my hands on my hips and drop my stare to the concrete. Fucking Kitten…what the hell are we going to do?

I barely have time to figure out the first step of my plan when Ted slips three credit cards in my line of sight.

“The cards you wanted.”

I take them and stuff them into my pocket. “Were they where I said they’d be?”

He nods. “In your bedside drawer.”

“Thanks.” I run my hand over my face. “I should get back…”

I really wish tonight worked out better than this. I wish I could return to the lake house with some kind of plan.

“I’m sorry I can’t help you, Stone. I really am.”

His eyes are soft—apologetic. It sends heavy tendrils of dread burrowing through my chest. Now I see why Emily hates it so much. The sympathy…it doesn’t feel good. Even with the dense feeling of failure on my chest I shrug his apology off. I’m thankful he’s come this far for me at least. He drove hours just to meet me here.

“Don’t worry about it.” I tell him. “I’ll figure it out.”

I step around Ted and head for the large convenience store across the parking lot. I make it halfway before I turn around. He has his door open and an arm on the roof.

“Do me a favor? Make sure Jess is on a plane by this time tomorrow night?”

He nods. “Sure thing, brother.”

I wrap my arms around myself and turn around. Though I didn’t get what I wanted from Ted at least I got my cards. I can’t exactly fight an entire criminal empire with an empty stomach and a bad case of pneumonia.

I don’t know what my future plans hold, but at least they begin with warm clothes and a full belly. Once I’m sorted, I can take on the world.

Him

Emily

And he feels so good, so refreshing like cool rain on burning skin. I’ve lost count how many times he thrusts his cock so passionately into me, breathing heavy into the nape of my neck, my name sliding erotically off of his tongue.

I know I’m asleep. I know I’m dreaming, but I don’t care. This is what I want. He is what I want.

One of his large, strong hands grip my ass and he aggressively moves my hips into him, forcing my pussy to milk him as hard as it can.

And I am so close…so close I can taste it. Yes. Fuck. Please! It’s absolute torture to teeter on the edge of an orgasm.

Sweet, agonizing torture.

Despite how good he feels there’s something missing… something lacking. It isn’t until I feel the very tip of his finger at my ass that I know what it is. I’ve never done that before, but I’ve never desired it as much as I do now…

My eyes flutter open as my back meets a soft mattress. I blink a couple times, clearing away the blur that covers my eyes. The sun is barely up, but its early morning glow is sufficient enough to light the bedroom, allowing me to see his face. And what a face he has.

“Sorry.” He whispers. “I thought you’d be more comfortable up here…”

“You’re back?” I croak out, tiredly.

“I knocked four times.” He says, smiling slightly. “You didn’t hear me.”

I must have been in a deep sleep. Imagine how screwed I would have been if Skull somehow managed to locate us. I roll onto my side. “How’s your sister?”

Jai sits on the edge of the bed and when he glances down, I take the opportunity to swallow the saliva pooling in my mouth.

“She’s safe.” He says, looking back at me. “She’s flying out to Italy today, I hope.”

I sigh. “I love Italy.”

I wish I was able to get on a plane and leave the country whenever I wanted.

“I know. That’s why I sent her there.” Jai scratches the back of his head. “I thought that maybe, when this is over, we can meet her in Rome.”

My eyebrows shoot up. “We? As in me and you?”

He nods. “You love Italy.”

Fact.

“I do.”

“So that’s where we’ll go.”

I roll onto my back. “But Italy is expensive…and a long way away.”

Jai frowns and tilts his head to the side. “You’d give up the chance to go to Italy?”

“If it puts financial stress on someone else, yes.”

He turns his body towards me and my heart kicks up in tempo as he reaches over my waist and plants his hand on the mattress. His forearm presses against the side of my body and all I can do is focus on it. My breath halts in my throat as he leans in close, so close his breath skitters over my lips.

“You’re coming to Italy with me and I’m going to show you the time of your life.”

Oh, fuck Italy for the moment. I’m not even thinking about that anymore. I can’t. Not while his body heat is burning against mine. Sure, going to Italy is a dream come true, but it’s not something I can have right now. The word alone isn’t going to sate my desire for adventure and pleasure. I watch Jai as he watches me and he sees it. I know he does.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

Because I want you to fuck me hard, soft, and drive me fucking crazy! As if it isn’t obvious.

“Like what?” I ask, putting a spin of innocence on it.

That way he can’t tell my insides are raging because I’m horny as hell for him. My lips curl into a smug grin.

“Like that.”

I push myself up onto my elbows. “Are you tired?”

His eyes darken with promise as he leans a little closer. “No.”

“I like your answer.”

He closes the gap, pressing his forehead against mine. Electricity sizzles between us. It’s a tension that’s causing my muscles to tense and my nipples to harden.

“Why are you tormenting me?”

I brush my lips over his and in the silence I hear his breath hitch.

“You consider my desire for you torment?”

“Of lethal degree. Do you have any idea how fucking tormenting it is being alone with you? It’s like willingly crushing your balls in a vice.”

Wow. That’s one hell of a compliment…I also don’t know how bad that feels, you know, because I don’t have balls.

“You kissed me earlier.” I utter, reminding him of the brief moment we spent on the dock. “Did you like it?”

He groans followed by an almost silent curse. “You’re getting me hard talking in that low voice, Kitten. Of course I liked it.”

He tries to back away, but I follow him until I’m on my knees with his collar in my hands. My fingers tremble around the fabric and his breath blows with uncertainty across my face.

“Show me.”

“Emily—”

“Please.” I whisper, kissing him softly on the mouth. “I need you inside me.”

He hangs his head back, exposing his throat. I don’t care what anyone says the throat is one of the sexiest things a man has. I’d put it up there underneath obliques, a nice smile and a sense of humor.

I plant a soft kiss at the base of his throat.

“I had a dream about you.” I murmur against his hot skin.

His Adam’s apple bobs, as he swallows hard.

“Fucking hell.” He sighs. “Stop tempting me. I don’t have protection.”

Ah, so his hang up is protection. No big deal. The chances of me being getting pregnant are slim to none. I can’t even recall the last time I had a period. A common companion to PCOS is…what did my doctor call it? Amenora? Amenorrhea? Either way, I’m practically infertile and if a single unprotected fuck session is going to reverse all of that then, shit, the baby deserves to be born. I’d mention my condition, but nothing is more of a boner killer than a word with ‘orrhea’ at the end. Especially during sex.

“You want to know what you were doing to me…in my dream?”

Under my lips, his throat vibrates with another groan. They zip over the surface of my tongue and into my body. I’ve never wanted a man like I want Jai and I want him bad. I crave his touch like a crack addict craves their next fix.

“You were fucking me. Hard.” My breath hitches as I recall it.

Hot.

Sweaty.

Passionate.

“And you felt so good.”

Jai swears. Again. “Shit.”

I pull back enough for him to bring his face to my level. When we’re face to face and I can no longer see into the dark depths of his deep, blue eyes, I know there’s no going back. He’s going to give me exactly what I want. A strong man always gives a lady what she wants.

“Did you come?” He asks, his voice sinfully inappropriate.

Smirking, I shuffle forward and slip my leg over his thighs. “I could have, but you woke me up.”

I slide forward until my hips are flush against his. His body is warm and firm. His body is everything a man’s should be. As the tips of his fingers brush over my thighs, his touch disappointingly muted by the thin, gray fabric of my sweatpants, I brush my lips against his.

“That’s terrible.” He whispers against my mouth. “It’s terrible I brought you so close to the edge only to tear it away from you.”

I smile, planting a soft kiss on his mouth. “I’m not worried.”

“No?”

I shake my head. “I prefer the real thing anyway.”

I grip the hem of my navy blue hoodie and pull it off over my head. In the dim, but still so very exposing, light he becomes fixated on my breasts and I toss my hoodie to the floor.

“No bra?”

I smirk and lean in, giving him a slow, sultry lick on his lower lip.

“No panties, either.”

Just like that, Jai’s resolve shatters into tiny little pieces. One heartbeat is all it takes to push me from in control to completely at his mercy. One moment I’m straddling his lap and in the next, I’m flat on my back, his hot, wet mouth devouring my hard nipples one at a time.

“I’m so glad you’re back.” I sigh, pushing my fingers through his messy hair.

He releases my hardened peak with a ‘pop’ and air rushes in to cool his warm saliva.

“Did you doubt I’d come back?”

I rake my fingers down the back of his head before sliding my smooth fingertips across his cheeks, guiding his mouth to mine.

“It’d be a lie if I said it didn’t cross my mind.” I kiss the corner of his lips. “There was a small part of me that thought maybe you’d leave me behind.”

He watches intently as I slip my thumb into my mouth to gather some moisture right before I take it out and slide my hand between us. Jai lifts his hips, allowing my hand to slip effortlessly under the hem of his pants. His hard cock greets me straight away and, making a tight noise in the base of his throat, Jai drops his head and I feel his fast, warm breath on my ear and against my neck.

“I’d never leave you behind.” He whispers tightly as I circle his wet tip with my thumb.

Those are the nicest five words I think I’ve ever heard in my life. I grip his thick shaft and he thrusts into my hand, making the silky soft skin slide up and down. His cock is hot, hard and smooth and I can feel its protruding veins just under the tight skin.

“I’d always come back for you, Kitten. I’m yours.” He mutters against the lobe of my ear.

I freeze for a second. So does he. He’s mine? What does that mean? More importantly, what the fuck am I supposed to do with that? I’ve never had anyone before…I’ve never had a person—a person who belongs to me, who I would refer to as ‘mine’. Is Jai mine? Am I his? Or have I completely misinterpreted his meaning?

I’d never leave you behind. I’m yours.

I’m.

Yours.

It doesn’t get much clearer than that though, does it? Jai lifts his face so it’s directly in front of mine. His thoughtful blue eyes flicker over my face analyzing every twitch, line and freckle.

“Does that scare you?” He asks. “Does the thought of having someone make you uncomfortable?”

I shake my head. A lie. The only people who have ever wanted me in their life changed their mind at the last second. Do you know what it’s like? Feeling overwhelming happiness to the point of crying only to have it ripped from your body and crushed into a million pieces right in front of your eyes? When someone changes their mind on you as a person you can’t help but feel worthless…cheaper than any product, as useless as any device. It has taken me a long time to get over all the times it happened to me as a kid…and I don’t think I can go through it again. Not with him.

“It terrifies me.” I mumble, swallowing hard. “You want me now, but what about tomorrow? Next week? In a month’s time?”

Jai glides his fingers between my breasts and down my stomach, raising shivers from head to toe.

“Why would time change how I feel about you?”

A lump forms in my throat as I remember all the times I’ve been burned. It’s called the cooling off period and it’s a mother fucker. I swallow the lump.

“Because it always does.”

I pull my hand from his pants, done with the conversation. To have sex with him when I know he’s emotionally invested is wrong, and it’s bad for my heart, too. The faster I fall down this rabbit hole, the harder the impact will be when I hit the cold hard floor at the bottom—and I just know it’ll be the coldest, hardest floor imaginable.

I attempt to turn my body and roll out from underneath him, but he grips my shoulders and pushes me back against the mattress.

“Jai.” I complain, pushing his chest in a lame attempt to get him off me.

It’s a wasted effort. Pushing against his body is like trying to move a boulder when its bottom is buried seven feet underground. I grit my teeth until they ache and my muscles tremble. Nothing. He lets me push at him for a few seconds before he ‘tsks’ in frustration and grabs my wrist. I growl as he pins my hands above my head and drops his hips harder against mine.

“Jai—”

“No.” He bites out, cutting me off. “Now you shut up and listen.”

I glare up at him and his aggressive, blue eyes.

“I care about you. Why is that so fucking hard to accept?”

Tears pool at the rims of my eyes and I hate it. I’ve cried more in the last month than I have between the ages of ten and twenty-one.

“Because this entire thing is fake. Our relationship exists only in a forced environment. Am I the type of girl you’d approach in a bar or at the mall?” I shake my head. “I’m not your kind of girl. I’m not anyone’s kind of girl.”

His grip tightens. “Then what are you?”

Funny enough, he poses a question I’ve been asking myself my entire life. What the fuck am I?

“I don’t know…I guess…I guess I’m nothing.”

He releases my hands and I pull them to my chest.

“I make you feel like nothing? When I touch you and kiss you, you feel nothing?”

I shake my head. “I feel everything…and that’s what scares me. When this is over and you move on there’ll be something bigger and better waiting for you—someone funnier and prettier, someone who won’t have the one million hang ups I do. But this is it for me. You are it. What I experience with you I know I’ll never experience with anyone else. For the rest of my life I will be comparing other men to you and they won’t even come close. I can’t handle that.” I swipe at a stupid fucking tear. I can’t believe I’m getting so emotional over this. “So don’t fuck with my feelings and don’t tell me you’re mine. Sure, we can pretend while we’re stuck in this mess, but don’t lead me to believe this is something it will never be. I can’t handle that. Not anymore. Not after the life I’ve had.”

Jai presses his forehead against mine as the tips of his fingers caresses the side of my face. “Christ. Do you ever give yourself a break?”

I open my mouth to speak, but Jai crushes his lips to mine, preventing any words from falling out. As his tongue licks mine, I don’t even remember what I was going to say in the first place.

And that’s okay. I’m done talking anyway.

Her

Jai

Fucking Kitten. How can one woman be so damn infuriating? You tell any other girl you’re all hers and she’ll just about cream her pants. But not Kitten. No. God forbid she make anything easy for me. I knew the moment I met her she had some pretty high walls protecting her, but I was certain I’d done a good job at bringing them down. Apparently, her walls are extra-fortified. Once they crumble to a certain percentage, they send out an alert and build themselves back up again. Lucky for her I’m a fiend for punishment.

I never intended to say what I said. I was so caught up it just came out. Still, I meant it. If there’s any girl on this planet that is tailor made for me she is it. I don’t mean she’s my soul mate or that we’re made for each other. I’m talking in terms of companionship, a mutual friendship. She knows me and I’m comfortable around her. That’s all I care about. She’s right about one thing, though. I would never approach her at a bar or at the mall. Mostly because I don’t ‘approach’ women. It sounds fucking creepy. I talk to women—any woman. It doesn’t matter if they’re youthful or mature, sweet and skinny or big and beautiful. My willingness to be with a woman depends on what they have on the inside, not how their exterior appears. I like intelligence and strength in a woman. I like humor and curiosity. I don’t give a shit about what they can offer me physically. That being said, I can’t deny the fact I’ve indulged in sex with women I’ve barely known on plenty of occasions, but it wasn’t like I coerced them into it or promised them more. They wanted it. They had something I desired in one way or another. It is what it is.

But Kitten ticks all my boxes—boxes I didn’t know I had until this very moment. She’s had my back since day one. She trusted me when she didn’t have to and she’s allowed me to find comfort in her body when I probably shouldn’t have. I’m not perfect. I’m so far from perfect I’m practically the antonym. I’ve made mistakes, that I know, but she is yet to use them against me.

My tongue glides with hers and my hips are locked into place by her slender, but strong legs that are wrapped tightly around me.

There’s one thing I know for certain about Emily and it’s that she has this pull. The air surrounding her is heavier than anywhere else. When I’m close I can’t breathe. Her very existence suffocates me and I crave it. I crave the dense air in my lungs and it gets worse when her mouth is on mine…because I’m willing to suffocate for a longer lasting taste of her. I break the kiss and rest my forehead against hers. A moment ago she wanted me badly and her heavy-lidded eyes tells me she still does. I trail the back of my fingers between her generous breasts and down the flat slope of her stomach to the hem of her black yoga pants. A part of me tells me to slip under the hemline and finger fuck her into oblivion. The other part advises I don’t want to be an asshole and perhaps ask for permission since she seems to be in a sensitive place.

“Can I?” I ask, brushing my fingers along the fabric.

I lift my stare to meet hers and her deep brown eyes lock me in place. Who would have thought sex with her started out so emotionless and primal, but now I’m considering her feelings while almost being swallowed whole by mine.

I can’t help it. It’s like she fills the void that has developed inside of me all these years. She makes me feel like maybe…maybe this will all be okay in the end and that I won’t be alone when it’s over. After everything I’ve been through, that’s something I need. Desperately.

Emily’s forehead slides against mine as she nods. Our eyes stay locked as I flatten my palm against her abdomen and slip it under her pants. She’s not wearing panties—just like she said. My blood heats at the thought of it being all for me.

I glide my hand over the hairless mound at the top, unable to stop until my fingers slide against her tidy lips. My cock throbs.

Smooth.

Bare.

Wet.

So. Fucking. Wet.

I try to keep my cool, but there’s no ignoring the tension that constricts my dick. My mind goes erratic. Mine. Mine. Mine. All fucking mine.

Pressing lightly, I slide my fingers up and down, teasing not touching. Emily lets out a gentle sigh as I move to place soft kisses on her jawline. Her skin is flawless and smooth, and it emits a tantalizing berry scent as I run my nose down the length of her throat. It bobs with a hard swallow and under my lips, goose-bumps rise. She sighs again and this time her hips squirm, begging me to hurry up. I like that about Emily. She’s not afraid of sex or afraid of looking too eager for it. If she wants it, she shows me just how bad. There is no flirting—no mind games—only us and our unrelenting desires, begging to be quenched in the rawest of ways.

Removing my hand from between her thighs, I kiss my way down her stomach, reveling in the way it clenches every time my lips grace her flesh. She is perfect. Every inch of her. This lost little Kitten is, quite possibly, the most beautiful woman I’ve ever had the pleasure of seeing naked.

Sitting back on my heels, I grip the edges of her pants. Instantly, she lifts her hips for me and I shuffle backwards, sliding the fabric down her perfect legs before tossing them to the floor.

She’s naked. And I’m stuck. Frozen stiff. Yep, stiff. Have you ever seen something so incredibly mesmerizing and breathtaking that you don’t want to look away, even for a second, because you know you’ll never see anything as beautiful as it again for the rest of your life? This is like that. Only she’s a human being that can be touched and explored…the most dangerous kind of art. It almost feels wrong to taint it, but I’m going to.

Because I need to claim her as mine…

Because I’m selfish and, deep down, I’m as primal and as ugly as a caveman born to adhere to my baser urges. Though civilization has changed us and morphed us into men who ask permission, we are still as weak as we were in the beginning. There is no conforming. There is no cure.

She slips a hand over her stomach and I notice the movement is a little self-conscious. Why wouldn’t it be? I’m sitting here staring like I haven’t seen her naked before. I suppose I haven’t, technically.

I pull my shirt off over my head and toss it to the floor. Emily watches me through half-lids as I lower my body over hers. I see a lot in her eyes… excitement, anticipation and fear.

“Emily…” I whisper.

Emily

My name filters in through my ears and I just about shiver. I can barely breathe as nerves suffocate my voice box.

“Mm?”

Jai brushes his nose gently against mine.

“Are you all right?”

I nod, but I’m not so sure. Is it normal to feel this pressure in my chest? The way my palms are sweating, is that okay? What about the overwhelming urge to hold Jai close and never let him go? Is that a sex thing? Or is that my feelings betraying me?

“To be honest, you look a little nauseous.”

I muster a small smile as Jai’s dark, blue eyes flare and widen while his lips curve at one corner.

“Finally caught feelings, have you?” He teases.

“You don’t catch feelings.”

He kisses my mouth once. “Sure you do. They come out of nowhere and hit you when you least expect it.” He kisses me again. “Like now.”

The pressure in my chest becomes dense, like a sack of potatoes at the realization. Shit. I have caught feelings. I mean, I’ve always had feelings for Jai, but not like this. I’ve never wanted to cry at the thought of him leaving me…before now.

“Relax.” He chuckles, running a hand up my inner bicep and down the side of my breast. “Why are you so terrified of feeling something?”

I’ve been asked this question once before by the woman at my first children’s home. It was when I made the decision to never cry again. ‘Why are you so afraid of feeling something, Child?’ I didn’t answer her aloud, but I remember my internal answer well. ‘I’m not afraid of feeling. I’m afraid of losing.’ It doesn’t make much sense to me now, but it did back then. I guess what it means is; you can’t have your heart broken if you stop giving it out to people. At the end of the day, no one can take care of your heart like you can and you know why? Because when it shatters by their hand, only you feel it.

“I’m terrified because it makes this real.” I tell him. “Aren’t you scared of this becoming real?”

Jai’s large hands surround my face and cup my chin. “It’s real already, Kitten. It was real the second you came to my room after your shower.”

So it was. I throw my arms around his neck and crush my mouth to his, kissing him hungrily. His mouth devours me, his tongue fucking mine so perfectly. To feel his weight directly on me brings a comfort like no other.

Jai pulls back for air for only a second before his mouth finds the column of my throat. I moan and close my eyes as he leaves a line of nips and kisses behind as he makes his hungry way to my breasts.

My breath catches as he eagerly sucks the first nipple into his mouth. Light tremors shake me as he tastes it and swirls his hot, wet tongue around the pebbled flesh.

“Oh!” I choke out, squeezing him between my thighs.

I barely have time to get used to the feeling before he switches to the second breast and sucks at it like it’s the last breast he’ll ever put in his mouth. Again, the feeling barely registers before he licks and bites and sucks his way over my ribs and down my stomach. I stuff my hands under my pillow to keep them from pulling his hair. My flexing hips are a lost cause, forever destined to push against his excited lips, urging him lower.

All thoughts flee as he stops at the apex of my thighs and peers up at me. Unashamedly, my head is craned so I can watch him ravish me completely. He flashes me a wicked smile that just about melts my skin from my bones before lowering his head, raining soft, tender kisses on my inner thighs. My blood buzzes and my chest heaves. It takes him all of two seconds to send me into a frenzy of need.

“Fuck, Jai.” I hiss, unleashing my hands. I reach down and rake my fingers through his hair. “Please!”

He smiles against my skin and I feel it. He sucks a portion of flesh between his lips and catches it between his teeth. I hiss again, yanking my thigh free as his teeth click together. Still with a grip on his dark hair, I wiggle my hips, unable to hide my fevered anticipation for him to finally put his mouth on my pussy.

After another eternity of teasing, of feeling his hot breath right where I desire different parts of his anatomy, he relents, pressing his lips and tongue against my body’s most sensitive spot. And I moan. Loud. Suddenly, my orgasm rushes me, taking me completely by surprise as his tongue finishes its sixth or seventh stroke. I sink my teeth into my bottom lip as my legs quake and my stomach clenches. A second later, my mouth opens and I cry out in ecstasy as he continues to taste me. When the feel of his perfectly trained muscle becomes unbearable, I giggle and he lifts his head.

“Fuck, Kitten. That didn’t take long.”

I simper as my body slows in its shaking. Jai slides up next to me, his fingers dancing over my stomach and onto my breasts. I turn to gaze into his eyes, a content smile curling my lips.

“You like my tits?” I ask and his eyes become hooded.

“They’re fucking perfect.”

His large hands cover them completely and still it squeezes out between his fingers. Excitement—pure, nasty excitement—bubbles at the thought of what I’m going to say next.

“Have you thought about fucking them?”

Through his pants, Jai’s long, thick cock twitches against my thigh. “There isn’t a sliver of flesh on your body I haven’t thought about coming on.”

Well, fuck. My horniness multiplies tenfold. I’m not sated with just coming on his tongue. I want more. I need more.

“Show me.” I utter.

Reaching down I push on the hem of his pants and, without delay, Jai shoves them down his legs and kicks them off the edge of the bed.

I tease the tip of his erection and pre-cum spills out. It’s so fucking hot. Jai lets his head fall back as I circle him with the very top of my index finger. Breathing heavily, he brings his head back to my level and his eyes are darker than I’ve ever seen them. And it’s a major fucking turn on.

I gasp as Jai jolts forward and snatches my wrists in his hands. I don’t have time to react before he pins my hands to either side of my head and thrusts his leg over my body so he straddles my ribcage.

“You want me to fuck your perfect tits?”

I nod, wriggling in the most delicious state of arousal underneath him. I could come again just from seeing him from this angle and feeling the weight of his cock on my chest.

“Have you ever been titty fucked before, Kitten?”

Raking my teeth over my bottom lip, I shake my head. I am so god damn wet. Releasing my hand Jai brings his hand to his mouth and spits into it. I swallow hard as he rubs his own saliva all over his cock.

“Lick your hand, baby.” He orders as he strokes himself.

Doing as he asks, I lick my hand. Freeing my other hand, Jai tells me to lick that one too. So I do. Then he has me rub it on my chest and turns me on like nothing else. When I’m wet enough for his liking, he slides forward, pushing his thick cock between my breasts. With a throaty groan that electrocutes my blood, he grabs my hands and places them on my tits. He thrusts and covers my hands with his. Together, he has us squeeze my tits so it encases his beautiful shaft. He thrusts in rhythm—a rhythm that makes my pussy pulse and it grows in tempo. I obviously don’t receive any sexually gratification from this, but I find it rewarding anyway. It’s pleasurable in a way that isn’t physical. I can’t explain it.

Jai flicks his hips faster and faster, and as the tip of his cock almost touches my chin, I flick my tongue out to lick the tip. Pre-cum flows, making it even easier for him to slip between my breasts. When I glance up at him, I notice he’s watching me. Teasingly, I slip my tongue out again and flick it over the top of his cock.

“You are—” He grunts and closes his eyes. “Fucking hell.”

With amazing willpower, he slows his hips and pulls his hands away from mine. Jai inhales, trying to gain his composure, but it is way too soon for that. Biting my lip, I move my breasts up and down, up and down, making him hunch forward.

“You’re going to make me come.” He groans, swiping an index finger across my lip and into my mouth. I curl my tongue around his finger and suck. With a shiver, he slips his hips back, pulling his cock free from my tits and I pout as he smirks.

“I’m not done yet.”

Sliding down my body, his mouth finds mine again. Only this time when he kisses me, it’s soft and I melt into it. Tingles spread from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. I’ve never been kissed like this before…like it means something. It’s glorious. It’s the type of kiss that lasts a lifetime. At least if this doesn’t work out I’ll always have that.

I’m pulled from my thoughts by his knee as it pushes my legs apart. His mouth changes from sweet to savage, devouring with a greedy kiss. I gasp into him as his strong, thick arms weave around me and his fingers tangle themselves into my hair. I open my legs wider as the kiss deepens even further. Despite how hard I kiss him, how desperately our tongues fight against each other, it’s not enough. I need more.

Jai reaches between our bodies and grabs his cock. One second he’s stroking my entrance with his tip and in the next he’s driving into me with an urgency I wasn’t prepared for, an urgency that betrays his gentle, patient kiss. I cry out, raking my fingernails down his back—not deep enough to draw blood, but enough to let his body know just how deep I feel it.

And I feel it.

Holy shit I feel it. From the softness of his skin against mine to the harsh, carnality of his movements. All of it resonates with my body in ways I never thought possible. His raspy voice is the icing on the cake. It’s heavy and erratic with desire. He groans my name and little by little, with every thrust of his hips, I lose control over myself, letting the pleasure intoxicate me. I run my hands down his sides and grab him low on the hips before wrapping my thighs around him. Jai swears under his breath and it sounds distant in my ears. I’m far away, pursuing ecstasy in the distance. It’s closing in—I can feel it—but I need more. I need harder, faster. Without effort, Jai wraps an arm around my waist and sits back, pulling me up so I straddle his hips. My nerves become heightened, burning with excitement because I’ve never done this position before. I feel him in ways I’ve never felt anyone before. His large, heavy hands clamp down on my ass and he pushes and pulls me. Over and over and over again. It’s the edge I need to catch the fucking high I’m chasing. Every inch of my sensitive flesh rubs against him, adding to the storm swelling inside of me. It starts in my abdomen. It boils my blood and ignites my flesh. Quickly I progress through the eye of the storm and into the wall.

“Jai…”

My mouth parts, my breath holds in my lungs, and my toes curl with the promise of pleasure, a frenzy of catastrophic proportions.

He groans deep in his throat, his fingers dig deeper into my muscles and his movements become aggressive.

And when it hits, when the storm crashes down on top of me with the weight of a monsoon behind it…

…it is epic.

Us

Jai

She’s loud, and mouthy, and fucking glorious.

I rest my sweaty forehead against her chest. Her heart hammers at a quick pace. I can feel it rattling her ribcage. I love the sound.

“Oh, wow…” She sighs, resting her chin against the top of my head. Our heavy panting is the only sound to be heard in the room.

My cock twitches inside her body…which makes her the first woman I’ve actually come unprotected inside. Though it felt fucking amazing it’s an experience I don’t really recommend if you’re trying to avoid deepening a romantic connection. How barbaric, right? To suddenly feel like you would die to protect a woman all because you came so nakedly inside her? Like that’s what sealed the deal. I don’t know. I like Kitten—have for a little while now—but something has clicked. Something that tells me this is a sure thing. I wonder how fast she’d run if I told her how I felt? That maybe…just maybe…I might be falling for her. Perfect timing though, right? It’s like fighting the biggest fight of my fucking life isn’t complicated enough.

Emily lifts her head as I tilt mine to look up at her. Sleepy brown irises meet mine, curved by a soft, playful smile. I resist a shiver as she runs her hands up my chest and over my shoulders. “Why don’t you have any tattoos?”

I shrug.

“They’ve never appealed to me. Ink? Needles?” I shudder. “Pass.”

She flicks her eyes to the small skull on my collarbone…the one that matches hers. “And after that? Did it change your mind?”

I laugh. “Are you kidding? It was fucking painful. I thought I was going to pass out.”

“Yes! Oh my god. Me too!” Emily clamps a hand over her mouth and laughs. “It hurt so much.”

I lean back on my elbows and she comes forward, digging an elbow into my chest as she rests her head on the palm of her hand. I don’t mind it, even if her elbows are pointy as shit.

You know, I’ve never noticed it until now, but Emily’s lips don’t quite close. The top one remains separated from the bottom by the tiniest gap, exposing her top row of teeth. It’s sexy. A subtle, permanent pout. No wonder she always looks mad.

Stretching my neck, I lean forward until our lips brush. Just one more taste. That’s all. I flick the very tip of my tongue over her top lip and they curve into a smile.

“What are you doing?”

I pull back an inch. “Licking your lip.”

Emily arches a brow. “And why are you doing that?”

“To see if it tastes as good as it looks.”

Her lips fall back into their permanent pout and I lick her again. Soft and slow, until her thighs tighten around my hips and her pussy clenches me.

“Well?” She utters. “What’s the verdict?”

“You taste like an orgasm feels.”

Emily slaps me across the chest and jerks backward, her infectious laughter rebounding off of the barren, cream walls.

“What is wrong with you?”

“What?” I chuckle.

I grip her small biceps in my hands as he tries to shuffle off of me, and she squeals with delight as I roll my body, tucking her underneath me. Her breath halts in her chest as I lower my mouth to hers. That previous taste I said was my last one? Yeah. I lied. I want one more…and then possibly another. I brush my lips against hers and this time it’s her tongue that does the tasting. It glides against my upper lip, but it doesn’t stop there. In a swift movement, and with a deep inhale through her nose, she presses her open mouth to mine and her tongue dips in without a care. With the slightest groan, I slide my hips against hers. We’re making a fucking mess—that much is certain, but what is life if it’s not a little messy?

“We should shower.” She murmurs against my mouth, but I’m not having any of that. Not yet. “And eat.”

“We will.” I promise. “When we’re finished.”

And I am nowhere near done with her.

Emily

The wooden floorboard creaks underneath my foot as I push off of the last step and into the hall. Delicious, breakfasty smells engulf me and I press my hand to my belly with a groan as my stomach clenches painfully. If Heaven had a smell this would be it.

I pull on the hem of my tight, white tee shirt then rake my fingers through my combed, wet hair.

As I round the bend and step into the kitchen, I almost faint. It smells good in the hall, but it’s freaking amazing in here.

Greasy bacon.

Fluffy eggs.

Buttery toast.

Freshly cut fruit.

Thick, syrupy pancakes.

Oh. Fuck me sideways. I’ve never seen so much breakfast food. It’s rare I taste anything that isn’t beaten up or a few days past its expiration date.

To top off what will be hence forth known as the greatest morning of my life, there’s a young, sexy ex-police officer cleaning a frying pan in black sweat pants by the sink. I’m unable to hide my grin. If there is a God then she is definitely looking out for me.

How is this my life? If this is what fate is then I fucking love it…you know, except for the being hunted by a psychopathic drug-lord part. That blows.

On a completely unrelated side note, I hate the fact I’m wearing a tight pair of jeans. How am I going to have room for all this food if there are buttons in the way? Is that a pot of coffee, ooh, and yogurt? Yep. The jeans have got to go.

“Jeans, Kitten? Really?”

I glance at Jai who dries his wet hands on a small, checkered towel. I swallow hard. To see him in bright, natural light is a fucking vision and a half. I clear my throat.

“Well, when you said you were making breakfast I thought you meant cereal and milk…not the whole damn buffet.”

He folds his arms against his bare torso and leans against the kitchen sink. Now, if I could just work out how to get him onto my plate for breakfast…

“Cereal and milk? Please don’t tell me that’s all you eat for breakfast.”

I inch toward the food, drawn in by the smell as it fuses together. “No…I don’t usually have breakfast at all. If I do, it’s never anything more than a coffee or a stale, half eaten blueberry muffin from the day before.”

He grimaces. “Ah, well, at least it has blueberries in it.”

“Fake blueberries. It tastes like bubblegum.”

He shakes his head, disbelief plain on his features. “How are you—”

“Not fat? I walk a lot.”

He shakes his head. “What—no, not fat—sick. How are you not sick?”

I shrug. I often ask myself the same thing. Jai slings the towel over his shoulder and my throat dries, feeling rough like sandpaper, as he saunters toward me. My head spins and I swear the solid ground beneath my feet liquefies. With a subtle smirk, he reaches for the buttons on my jeans. I barely have time to grip his strong, hard biceps to keep from being knocked on my ass as he yanks my buttons open. Jai looks down at me, his deep, blue eyes flaring beautifully.

“Jeans.” He states in a firm, quiet voice. “Off.”

I arch a brow. “I’m going to eat breakfast in my underwear?”

He laughs once. “As much as I would love to see that. It’s far too cold.”

“You’re not wearing a shirt.” I argue.

I don’t care if we’re in the middle of the Arctic. Getting naked with him again sounds like a damn good idea.

“It got hot over by the stove.” He steps to the side and reaches out for his black jacket. “I bought a few pairs of sweatpants last night. Grab one. They’re over there.”

He points across the kitchen bench and into the sitting room. Sure enough, small stacks of clothes sit on the glass coffee table. Curious, I saunter towards them. The sitting room is plain—much like the rest of the house. I can’t help but notice whoever owns this place keeps it electronic free—except for the large radio on the shelf above a small white bookshelf.

“How’d you afford these?” I ask, reaching for a pair of sweatpants and lifting them up.

“I have my ways.”

I glance over to him as he zips up a black, cotton jacket, hiding his perfect torso from me.

“Vague much?”

A small smirk curves his lips as he rounds the kitchen bench and pulls out two wooden stools.

“Pants on, then come eat.”

Yeah, I’m not going to argue with that. How long has it been since I’ve tasted real food? I can’t even remember.

I swiftly ditch the jeans and slip into the black pair of pants. The cotton is silky smooth on my bare legs, warming me immediately. I see the appeal. These are much more practical for lounging around in. I tie the strings as tight as I can to prevent the pants from falling to my ankles and I practically trip over my own feet as I rush to the bench.

I slide onto the stool as Jai scoops a small mountain of scrambled eggs onto his plate. The first thing I reach for is the bacon and the maple drenched pancakes.

“So I was thinking I’d make a quick trip into town this morning.”

He stuffs a forkful of egg into his mouth and moans. I peer sideways at him, trying hard not to drool as tastes mingle over my tongue. Bacon and maple? It’s a match made in Heaven.

“Oh, yeah?” I manage to mumble out over a mouthful of food. “What for?”

Strangely enough, he avoids eye contact. “There are a few things I still need to get…like milk and maybe I can pick up one of those morning after pills…you know, just to be safe.”

Still no eye contact. I watch him, surveying the way his eyes dart over random surfaces while he chews his food.

“Why? You worried?”

He shakes his head and reaches across for a pancake. “No…no. I’m not worried.”

I believe that’s boy talk for ‘I wanna throw the fuck up.’ His brows furrow as he rakes his perfect teeth over his plump bottom lip. I was hoping to avoid this conversation, but I guess that’s kind of hard to do when you have unprotected sex. Unprotected sex brings the risk of pregnancy to the front of the brain.

“Save yourself the trip.” I reach for my glass of orange juice and swallow a large mouthful, despite my stomach’s aversion to it.

“Emily—”

“It’d take a couple machines, numerous fertility treatments and probably a surgical procedure to get me pregnant.” I let out a nervous laugh. “Unless your sperm knows how to perform surgery then I wouldn’t worry about knocking me up.”

He stares at me and dare I say, it’s super endearing.

“So…you can’t have children?”

I look away. I don’t like it when the question is phrased like that. Children…children…it sounds so personal, so precious, doesn’t it? I prefer pregnant. The word is a lot more sterile. Not being able to have a baby is a bitter pill to swallow. I mean, how cruel can life be? I don’t have a family and now I can’t create one of my own? I wonder what I did in a previous life that was bad enough for me to deserve this.

“Nope. Not without jumping through some invasive hoops and even then it’s unlikely.”

Now it’s my turn to awkwardly avoid eye contact while he stares at me. I stuff the second quarter of a pancake in my mouth and drop my fork against my plate. Two pieces of bacon and half a pancake and I’m done. I don’t know what makes me want to cry more, the fact I can’t have a family or that I can’t fit every crumb of this delicious meal into my mouth.

Jai lowers his fork and pushes his plate away. “I’m sorry…I didn’t know.”

I shrug it off. “You couldn’t have. It’s not your fault.”

Jai’s large, warm hand covers mine and he pulls on it, turning my chair to face his.

“You’re an incredibly strong woman, you know?”

Of their own accord, my lips pull themselves into a bashful smile. I don’t want to smile, but I can’t help it when I look at him or hear the deep, rough tenor of his voice. Since when did Mr. Underground get so sweet? And why is snuggling under a blanket with him all I want to do today?

He looks at me differently now compared to when we met. His eyes are softer and happier despite his situation.

Jai opens his mouth, but three heart stopping thumps on the front door echo down the hall and ceases them in his throat. Thick, painful tendrils of fear pierce my chest. Shit! What the hell do we do?

“Emily?” Jai whispers harshly, his voice pulling me back to the real world. “Did you hear me?”

“Uh,” I whirl around on my stool and take in the large shotgun he holds in his hands. Where the hell did he get that? I’ve seen them in movies a bunch of times but never up close and personal like this. They’re fucking terrifying.

“Emily?”

I jolt off the stool. “No. No I didn’t hear you.”

Placing his feet shoulder width apart and flexing his knees, he pulls the butt of the gun firmly into his shoulder. His face is void of any trepidation—any anxiety. He is stone cold and it’s kinda hot…scary, but hot!

Jai aligns his eye evenly with the sight of the shotgun, keeping his cheek tight to the stock. I’m too terrified to even hold a shotgun—let alone hold it close to my face.

“I said get the door.” He orders, his voice firm.

Without hesitation, I zip down the hallway and grip the door handle in both hands. The metal underneath my palms quickly becomes slick with sweat.

“Open it.” Jai orders, inching closer.

I squeeze my eyes shut and open the door…

…nothing happens.

I wait, dread and anticipation wreaking havoc in my chest. The sound of a heavy boot connecting with the timber floor echoes in my ears. I open my eyes as shock etches over Jai’s features. I wait for the trigger to be pulled. I wait for the shot to ring out…but it never comes.

“Is this how you greet all your guests?” A deep, smooth voice asks, humor present in his tone.

I don’t recognize the voice and it sets me on edge. I inch further behind the door, praying whoever it is doesn’t close it behind him and spot me cowering against the wall.

“How’d you find me?”

“I ran your plates. If you’re going to drive around I suggest you wear some kind of disguise or someone meaner than me will track you back here.”

I peer out from behind the door as Jai lowers the gun. Why isn’t he shooting? Why is he allowing this man into our safe house? I clench my trembling fists. The funny thing about fear is it can either force you into a deadly paralysis or it can pump you full of powerful, unadulterated adrenaline. I unclench my fists. I will not be captured by Skull today!

I kick the door shut and leap forward. The stranger barely has time to react before I wrap my arms around his throat and my legs around his waist. A little brown folder slips from his hand and crashes to the floor. I squeeze as hard as I can while he claws at my arm and throws his body around in panic. I’ve never killed anyone before and I’ve never wanted to, but in this moment—to keep Jai and I away from Skull—I’d do it. I’d squeeze until this stranger stopped breathing and then I’d dump his lifeless body in the lake.

“Unh!” I grunt as he slams my back into the wall and air is forced from my lungs.

“Jai?” The stranger manages to squeeze out over my battle cries. “Help me out here.”

“I’d love to.” Jai laughs. “First, tell me why you’re here?”

“I have…” He pauses to grunt, his throat vibrating against my forearm. “Information…Joel.”

The stranger manages to get a grip on my wrists and he pries them apart as a strong arm wraps around my waist. With a soft yank, I’m pulled off of the intruder.

The wide expanse of Jai’s chest presses into my back and I still as his large hand moves around to my belly, holding me firmly against him.

The stranger rubs at his throat, his golden eyes flicking over me and onto Jai.

“This is Emily, I assume?”

I swallow hard, but the saliva does nothing to put out the burn that’s scalding my esophagus. That forty seconds of screaming feels like three days at a festival on my throat.

“The one and only.” Jai replies and I can almost hear the smirk on his lips.

Panting, I take in the man in front of me…that’s when I notice the clean, pressed deep navy uniform, the shiny badge, and the two digits on his collar. Eighty-eight. He’s a police officer from New York. I glance at the badge again and underneath it on a glossy rectangle is his surname. Gile.

Gile extends hand to me. “I’m Ted.”

He has beautiful and flawless dark skin—a color that reminds me of a warm cup of cocoa on a cold winter’s night. His long, dark eyelashes frame two glowing golden eyes. There’s nothing malicious about him. There are no threatening tattoos, no metal capped teeth. Ted seems friendly…which is awkward as hell considering I just attacked him like an out of control monkey.

Jai relaxes his hand and nudges me forward with a subtle ‘bump’ of his hips. Gasping, I brush loose strands of hair out of my face and slip my hand into his.

“Emily…” I say. “Though you already know that.”

He smiles a wide, dazzling smile that showcases his bright, white teeth. I bet it’s a smile all the girls go crazy for. Jai’s hand tightens on my stomach and he pulls me back against his body. I like it here against him. Where I know it’s safe.

Realization flashes in Ted’s eyes as he looks us over. He bites his smile and bends low to gather the contents of his folder. When he’s done, he straightens his legs and starts down the hall.

“Do I smell breakfast?”

***

Ted slaps the folder down onto the bench and abandons it to grab himself a plate. Jai slips back on to his stool, but I remain perched by the side of the bench. It gives me clean access to both the front door and the back should anything go wrong. In front of me the deadly shotgun sits, waiting patiently to be fired.

“So I did some digging around after we met up last night —”

“Wait.” I cut in with a sharp look to Jai. “You guys met up?”

His blue eyes bear into me. “I needed help. We can trust him.”

Ted’s plate connects with the countertop and he rustles through the draw for a fork, but I don’t take my eyes off of Jai. I can’t make a call to the hospital to let them know I’m alive, but he can call his cop friend for help? What kind of bullshit is that?

“Skull is after you two something bad.” Ted states and I laugh once, slowly dragging my stare from Jai.

“Congratulations. You told us something we already know.”

Ted frowns, a little taken back by my attitude. I couldn’t care less if I’m coming off intolerant and rude. This is dangerous. He shouldn’t be here. How do we know he’s not buying time until the rest of his squad shows up to take us in? I clench the edge of the counter in my hands.

Ted looks at Jai who leans forward, resting his elbows against the wooden bench.

“Ignore her. She can be a little blunt. You said you had information on Joel.”

I scowl. Asshole.

Ted nods as he piles generous amounts of bacon and eggs onto his plate. “From what I gather, Joel fell off the grid months ago. At one point he was Skull’s top man—ran ‘errands’ for him. Then one day, poof. His face stopped showing up.”

I glance at Jai. His brows are pulled in, his lips tightly pursed.

“What are you saying?” I ask, ashamed of the little inkling of relief in my chest. “Are you saying he’s—”

“Dead? No. I don’t know where he is, but I don’t think he’s dead.” He scoops up some egg and stuffs it into his mouth. “That’s not how Skull plays his game.”

I fold my arms. “A game? You’re referring to this psycho’s life as a game? If you know so much about him then you know he needs to be stopped. Permanently.”

Ted shakes his head. “It’s not that simple.”

I laugh. “Not that simple? He’s a murderer— a monster. How is that not simple?”

Reaching for a paper napkin, Ted swipes it at a rogue drop of oil on his chin. “It’s a hard case to handle. Even if he’s captured and convicted of anything, it won’t stick for long. He’s sick—mentally ill. We’re aware of the situation with his family that day on the esplanade…there’s no doubt it had a hand in his psychotic break. Rehabilitation in a maximum security facility would be the worst he’d get.”

What the hell is wrong with the justice system? Why are they trying to rehabilitate these animals? I scoff. “That’s it? He should be hung by his neck. He stabbed a heavily pregnant woman in the stomach, killing her and her unborn baby.”

Ted and Jai exchange a confused look.

“What are you talking about?” Ted asks.

“Skull told me what he did…to the couple on the esplanade.”

“That’s what he told you?” Ted shakes his head. “Skull isn’t the perpetrator in that story. He is the victim. He cradled his dying wife until she bled out.”

Ted’s previous words sink in. We’re aware of the situation with his family that day on the Esplanade…

…his family.

I press my hand to my chest, but it doesn’t stop my ribs from clenching. I’m so fucking confused.

“A jogger found him an hour later just sitting there, holding them. A guy from the Twisted Sons shanked Skull’s wife as part of his initiation into the club. Little did they know Skull would later own New York.”

I shake my head. “But he told me he stabbed the pregnant woman…I’m certain of it.”

Ted shrugs. “I told you he’s not well. Who knows what’s going on in his head. Men like him are the worst kind of dangerous. They’re disconnected with reality. You wanna hope he doesn’t catch you two again.” Ted looks me dead in the eyes. “Especially you.”

I frown. “What’s that supposed to mean? Why me? I didn’t kill five of his buddies.”

I shoot a glare to Jai who shrugs it off with a roll of his eyes. That was hands down the most terrifying experience of my life. Just as Skull slipped his hand between my legs, bullets rang out in quick succession. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Skull was spared.

Skull. Was fucking. Spared.

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.” Ted stuffs a slice of bacon into his mouth and pushes open his file.

“What I’m about to show you is disturbing.” He manages to mumble out. “And it’s absolutely uncanny.”

Ted stops mid-way through his thick stack of papers and pushes it over to me. Skull’s face is the first I see. The black ink…the bones…the dark eyes. A shiver tears down my spine.

“Ah, sorry,” He flicks the page and stops at a peculiar photograph. What the f—my mouth falls open as Jai snatches it out from underneath me for a closer look. His dark, blue eyes lock onto me.

“It’s you.”

Until Next Time

Jai

It’s terrifying how similar the woman in the photo is to Emily. The dark hair and brown eyes—even all of the subtle freckles that start on one cheek and flow across the bridge of her nose to the other. There are subtle differences that stand out to me, like how this woman’s eyes are a little smaller and the way her nose points up at the end, but still…it’s fucking creepy.

“Well, it’s not actually you, but holy shit she comes close.” I say.

I toss the photo across the counter top and look at Emily. Her skin is pale—paler than normal. Her brows are furrowed and her mouth is closed and down turned at the corners.

When she notices me watching her, she grimaces.

“It’s kind of gross…” She says. “I mean…I look like his dead wife.”

“Like I said,” Ted states. “He’s sick.”

“So what do we do about Joel?” I ask. “Finding him is my top priority.”

Ted reaches out for the carton of orange juice and pours himself a large glass. “I have a buddy in the elite task force the FBI setup to pinch Skull. I asked him to keep an ear out for any information on your brother. I’ll let you know if anything comes up." He glances down at his watch. “I’ve got a shift in a couple of hours. I gotta leave now if I’m gonna make it in time.”

He glances around the kitchen. “Ya’ll got any spare containers?”

“I don’t know.” Emily sighs. “This isn’t our house.”

Ted waves his hand at her. “I didn’t hear that.”

He scours the wide kitchen drawers and eventually finds one filled with empty Chinese take-out containers and glass jars. Grabbing the largest one he can find, he brings it back to the bench and scoops the warm breakfast foods into it. A quarter of the way, he pauses to look at us.

“You don’t mind, do you?”

I shake my head. “Help yourself.”

I was done after my eggs anyway. My stomach seems to have shrunk to the size of a golf ball.

When he’s done, he slaps the lid in place and tucks the container under his arm.

“I’ll be in touch whenever my informant gets back to me with new information.”

Exhaling, Kitten pushes off the bench and saunters into the sitting room. There’s a slight chance she’s mad I involved a cop…but she doesn’t know him like I do. I’m sure he’ll prove himself and win her over eventually.

I walk Ted to the front door and he stops as he steps out onto the front porch.

“Hey, can I be real with you for a sec?” He asks, turning abruptly to face me.

I don’t like the stress on his face. It makes me nervous. I lean against the doorframe, but it provides no comfort.

“You gotta ditch the girl, man. She’s gonna bring you nothing but trouble.”

“No—”

“He wants her, Stone. Badly.”

“It’s not gonna happen, Ted. Any trouble she brings me is payback for the trouble I shoved on her in the first place. It’s because of me she’s in this mess. She wasn’t supposed to be down there.”

He drops his frustrated stare to the brown, worn wood beneath his feet. “I just hope you know what you’re doing…”

I don’t. I have absolutely no damn idea, but I can’t give up now. Not yet.

“Drive safe.” I tell him, turning away. “Whenever you have new information I’ll be here waiting.”

I step inside and close the door behind me. The wood is cold and uncomfortable against my back as I lean against it. Joel disappearing off the radar is not a good sign. I hold high hopes, but I’m also a realist. Prior to going underground I had Joel’s survival at about fifty-seven percent—a percentage I was happy risking my own life for. Now I have it at around twenty-four. Emily slips into view, her hand reaching across her slender torso to nervously hold the opposite elbow. Is twenty-four a number I’m willing to risk everything for?

I don’t know anymore.

Negative

Emily

Five days have gone by without a word from Ted. Jai is more…brooding…than usual.

His teeth nick my collarbone as his aggressive fingers are lost in my tangled hair. He smells like whiskey—the expensive kind.

I’ve tried my hardest to keep him in happy spirits, but his positivity is slipping.

He uses the word “if” a lot. If Joel is alive…

If we survive…

If I kill Skull. It’s disheartening to say the least.

Days ago he was confident enough to take on the world, but now he’s happy drowning in its problems. All he wants to do is fuck and sleep, eating only when his stomach groans, begging him to nourish it.

In this moment, despite his reluctance to eat, he moves like he’s hungry. I shiver as his large rough hands glide down my sides, pinching and squeezing at my flesh before stopping to rest on my hips. I don’t know how long we’ve been at this…hours maybe. Every delicious second seems to manifest into something longer. My muscles tremble, shaking from exhaustion. There’s an ache in them that hasn’t disappeared since the night we ran away. It’s more prominent when my legs are wrapped around his waist like this.

He slides his cock in and out of me, his hot breath blowing onto my chest in quick succession. My brain rolls in my skull as my body races to recover from my third orgasm. How can my body feel so exhausted yet so alive at the same time? It’s like I’ve dragged myself two miles only to dance on the exhilarating edge of a tornado. It doesn’t make sense.

“Emily.”

I gasp as his gravelly, pleading voice unleashes goosebumps on my skin.

“I need you.”

I run my fingers through his short, but wild hair. “I’m here.”

Jai’s fingers tighten against my scalp as he moves his hips frantically against mine.

“I need you.” He repeats.

His soft lips brush against my chest, then inch along my throat as he levels his eyes with mine. I lose myself completely in his gaze. There’s a silver glint in his eyes that sparkle through the deep blue. It bores straight through the shadows and paralyzes me on the spot. I’m captivated. Utterly helpless. Shuddering, he closes his eyes and presses his forehead against mine. Jai growls, a rough, aggressive sound deep in his chest. His breath is uneven as it clashes with mine and soon after, with my name sharp and pleading on his tongue, he comes inside of me, leaving me wondering what the hell that was all about.

***

Almost a week has passed by.

My hands shake and my biceps ache as I hold the handgun out in front of me. My heart pounds in my chest like a champion boxer slamming a bag. And like a worn out boxing bag, I feel like I’m going to tear apart at any moment.

If it’s not sex, it’s exercise. If it’s not exercise, it’s training. I’m not the fucking Karate Kid. This sort of abuse and discipline is not my life. I’m drowning here. Can he not see that?

“Keep your arms straight. Lock your elbows.” He orders.

“They are straight.” I bite back.

“Pathetic. Make them straighter.”

You know what? Fuck it. At this point I think I’d rather Skull catch me then spend another minute with Jai. It’s his moods, his negativity. It’s eating at me. During the night he whispers sweet things to me, but as soon as daylight hits it’s like he’s a different person. It’s confusing the hell out of me. It’s as if he’s the cool kid in school who’d kiss you when you’re alone, but call you names when he’s around his friends.

With a huff, I lower the gun. Jai slips his arm underneath mine, catching them before I drop my arms all the way.

“You want a hero?” He asks, raising my arms again. “Then be one.”

Fine. Gritting my teeth, I press the trigger. The gun kicks back as vibrations zip up my arm and adrenaline shoots through me. I missed the tree, but it doesn’t matter. I’m ecstatic I finally got the courage to squeeze the trigger. I grin.

“You’re not focusing hard enough.”

Aaand there’s goes my excitement.

“I’m not you. I can’t shoot a damn gun.”

“What are you going to do when push comes to shove? When it comes down to you or someone else?”

“I’ll have you.” I say, dropping the gun.

I’m not a fighter, not physically and he knows that.

The gun hits the ground with a thud, squashing all the leaves beneath it with a crunch. I hold his stare, unwilling to back down. I expect him to scoop me up and throw me in the lake. What I don’t expect is his cold hands to grab my face. My breath catches in my throat as he cranes his neck and pulls my face to his.

“You will have me.” He mutters, his cobalt eyes flicking between mine. “But I’m not enough. If I screw up…” He moistens his lips. “I need to make sure you can take care of yourself.”

The scent of him tears through me and despite how many times I’ve had him, desire still swells between my thighs.

“Nothing is going to happen to me.”

He drops a hand from my face and slides it firmly around my waist. My pulse slams into overdrive, pounding harder than any gun can make it, and my skin prickles all over. The warmth in my chest spreads up my neck to blush my cheeks. I’m filled with the urge to kiss his soft, full lips. I don’t want to talk about the possibilities of how this could end. Not today. For the moment I want to live. I want to spend however many days I have left feeling loved by the only person who has cared for me.

I flatten my hands against his muscular stomach and inch up on my toes. His abs tighten as our lips brush, sending a torrential downpour of sensations through my body.

“Well ain’t this some shit.” I jolt away from Jai, stumbling over my own feet.

“While some of us are out here working our asses off you two are having the time of your life.”

Ted tucks a bulky, black laptop under his arm. He’s not in uniform today. Instead, he’s wearing a tight black tee and black sweats to match.

“You have new information?” Jai asks, ignoring Ted’s comment.

Ted holds up his hand and tucked between his long, slender fingers is a small blue chip.

“Better. I’ve got video footage.”

Inadequate

Jai

I rest my elbows on my knees and focus on the little black screen. The images are blurry. It looks like grains of sand on faded ink. Emily nestles in beside me, her hand lightly placed on my bicep for comfort.

Ted reaches over and taps the screen. “This is one of Skull’s outer warehouses. Watch closely.”

I lean closer to get a better look at the two men standing around with rifles in their hands. Two more men approach from behind. I can just make out a third tired body as they drag it, his legs lagging in the gravel behind him. My stomach rolls and my fists clench. A small eternity later, they drag the body to a white van and stuff it inside.

Then the clip ends.

“He’s alive.” Kitten exhales in relief, but it’s not that cut and dry.

I need to know for certain.

“You can’t prove that’s him.”

Ted smiles excitedly. “Oh, but I can.”

His finger slides over the pad, double tapping every now and then.

“Our videos can’t film for more than twenty-five seconds at a time, but we can get at least forty seconds in with audio recording.”

“Why is it so limited?” Emily asks. “Shouldn’t you have the best gear in the business?”

Ted shrugs his broad shoulders. “Yes and no.”

With a final click, he turns the laptop back to me. It’s the audio file.

“Hit play.”

I click the button and static noise is all I hear. I lean in close, desperate not to miss a single sound. Three, four, five seconds pass and I expect to hear Joel’s voice, but it doesn’t come.

“Skull wants him moved to California tomorrow night.” A thug states.

The reply is distorted by the sound of a passing train. I strain my ears, but trying to listen over it is impossible, forcing frustration to simmer in my stomach.

“I don’t know.” The first thug says as he speaks again. “Skull doesn’t want to lose him. He’s on edge now that his brother is running around town fucking with Skull’s business.”

And that’s it.

Forty seconds and that’s it? I launch to my feet, grab the little laptop and throw it across the room. Emily jumps as it slams into the wall, shattering into pieces.

“That’s all you’ve got? A fucking week and a half and that is all you bring me?”

Ted slowly pushes himself to his feet, his arms outstretched in front of him, his palms exposed to me like I’m some kind of threatening animal.

“I’ve brought you the information you’ve been looking for. This is confirmation your brother is alive.”

I laugh. “Confirmation? What did that shitty video confirm? I couldn’t even tell if the body they were carrying was black or white.”

A growl tears from my throat as I kick the coffee table and it flips onto its surface, smashing the small, ceramic vase on the wooden floor. I turn to Emily to ask her what she thought of the video only she’s gone. Nowhere to be seen.

“I know you’re frustrated.” Ted states. “But we’re going to get your brother back. Tonight. I promise.”

He runs his hand over his face and exhales.

When did I get so negative? He’s telling me my brother has been located and I trash him? What the hell is wrong with me?

“You’re certain the body they’re dragging is Joel’s?”

Ted nods, placing his hands in his hips. “Without a doubt.”

“When can we get him?”

He lowers himself on to the couch and props up an orange pillow as he lies flat on his back.

“Our window is small. My buddy in the elite force says they’ve spent a long time trying to nail down Joel’s location, so he’s given us tonight and tonight only to get him out before his boys in blue show up.”

I frown. A time limit. Fantastic.

“What time will the squad get there?”

“o-nine-hundred.”

“Okay. If we leave in two hours we should make it there well before them.”

Ted nods, his chin touching his chest. “That’s what I was thinking—oh—and one other thing. My boy wants in.”

“In on what?”

“The rescue mission.”

“No. No fucking way.”

Calling in Ted for his help was hard enough and he expects me to let some random in to my inner circle? I don’t think so.

“Huss is fucking insane, Jai. We’re going to need him if we want to pull this off.”

“I can’t trust him.”

Ted closes his eyes. “I’m not asking you to trust him. I’m asking you to trust me.”

What kind of twisted bullshit is that? Am I supposed to stake everything on those little six words? I’m asking you to trust me. What if Ted’s wrong? What if Huss is working his own angle? What the fuck happens then?

“Don’t worry so much, Stone.” He clears his throat as he nestles further into the couch and yawns. “I’ve got your back.”

You better. I pull myself from the room and bound up the stairs. The crisp, white door to Emily’s room is shut, making me hesitate. Maybe she’s mad? You smashed a laptop and flipped a table, you brute, maybe she’s scared. I don’t know what came over me…I don’t know what has been controlling me this past week, but I can’t shake it. This negativity is a parasite sitting on my brain, leeching off of my positivity. I’ve been an asshole. I’ve been moody, abusive, inappropriate, and bossy. I’ve taken from Emily over and over and she’s given it without an objection. She’s followed my every word, comforted me when I needed it and has never requested anything in return. The spoiled child in me didn’t even think twice about it and the neglected child in her never questioned it.

I stroll up to the door.

“Emily?” I call through the wood as I brush the back of my fingers along its smooth paint. No answer.

I push on the long, slender handle and open the door. The room is empty, void of a brooding Emily, but it’s filled with the blissful sound of rushing water as it spills over hard tiles.

She’s showering after the four hours we spent in the yard. Perhaps I was too hard on her. I just figured since Emily couldn’t fight she could learn how to shoot a gun. I acknowledge it now as a bad idea. The girl isn’t like me. She is innocent…a tainted kind of innocent—but innocent nonetheless.

I saunter through the room and over to the ensuite. I push the door open, not bothering to knock this time, knowing she won’t hear me over the roar of the shower anyway.

Steam envelops me along with the sweet smell of strawberry and rose.

“Ran out of things to smash downstairs, have you?” She calls out.

I’m unable to hold back my smile. At least I can trust her to never hold anything back from me. Through the fogged glass, I can see the bright blue hue of a sponge as she drags it up her shoulder and into the nape of her neck.

I whip my shirt off over my head and toss it to the ground before pushing my pants down my legs and kicking them across the room. Cold air clings to my naked form and all I can think about is hiding in the thick streams of hot water that spurt out relentlessly from the shower head.

I yank the shower door open and slip inside. Emily keeps her back to me, ignoring my existence. My smile widens as I reach for her sponge she’s using to clean the back of her neck and pluck it from her hand. With a huff, she impatiently tilts her head, planting her hands on her hips.

“So much attitude for such a little woman.”

She whips around, her face pinched into a scowl. “Give me my sponge back.”

I shake my head. “No.”

She reaches out for it as I move the sponge toward her body and I pull it away.

“Jai—l”

“Let me wash you.” I say, squeezing excess foam from the sponge.

Sighing, she relaxes her shoulders and I press the sponge against her left shoulder, then drag it in small circles over to the other side.

“Did I scare you?” I ask, watching the foam gather and build up on her wet flesh.

After a small eternity, I look her in the eyes. They soften, their color melting into a warm chocolate.

“Yes.”

I glide the sponge lower, soaping the tops of her breasts. She has beautiful skin—even more so when it’s wet.

“I wasn’t thinking…” I clear my throat. “Which is funny considering all I’ve done for the past week is think too much.”

I feel her hands, light and caring, as they press against my stomach. Instinctively, my muscles clench. There’s a certain feeling of calm that overcomes me when her gentle hands connect with my flesh.

“You should give your friend the benefit of the doubt.” She says, scooping soap off her chest and rubbing it over my stomach. Her hands glide over me like silk. “He’s put a lot on the line for you. He wouldn’t show you the video unless he was certain.”

“I know…I just…” I shake my head.

“What? You can tell me.”

She continues to wash me, her fingers gently tracing the ridges of my muscles. I exhale.

“I can’t help but feel like I’m making a huge mistake.” Her eyes meet mine. “I’m starting to realize there’s a chance I could lose everything—Jessica, my life…you.”

Emily pulls away from me and turns her back. I frown as she tilts her head back, letting the stream of water gush over it. Ah, of course. God forbid I mention her in relation to my life. She’s like a clam, shutting up tight whenever she feels threatened.

“Why do you always do that?” I demand, tossing the sponge to the floor.

She reaches down for her conditioner and squeezes a small amount into her hair. “Do what?”

“Ignore me when I include you in the list of things I care about?”

Emily massages the conditioner into her hair, filling the air with a strange, citrusy smell.

“I don’t.”

“Yes, you do.”

Stepping into the stream of water, she tips her head back again to wash out the bubbles. They run between her breasts and down the flat expanse of her tummy.

“The last time someone told me they wanted me in their life they left me waiting outside in the freezing cold so excuse me for giving you a cooling off period.”

“A cooling off period? I’m not purchasing a damn car, Kitten. I want you and I mean it.”

She holds herself in such low esteem, like she’s not worth anything. When I look at her I see more than just a pretty face. I see her intelligence and her strength. Maybe it’s my fault she doesn’t believe me when I tell her I want her. Maybe she needs to be taught how to love herself. Maybe a girl like her needs an honest man to show her how beautiful she is in order to believe it herself.

And she is beautiful…prettier than any rose and stronger than any metal. A phenomenon in her own right.

“I know you do.” She replies.

She steps out from underneath the water, dragging a hand over her face to clear off excess drops. “And that’s what scares me.”

She steps past me and pushes the door open before slipping from the shower. I stare at the fogged glass behind her. I’ve never had to work so hard for a woman’s affections in my entire life. Sure she gives me what I want sexually, but what about everything else? The stuff that is supposed to come with it? I stick my head under the hot jets of water. What the hell is wrong with me? I’ve never wanted love before. A woman’s affection was the last thing I thought about…and now I’m contemplating calling off my brother’s rescue mission because I want to keep her safe? When did my priorities get so skewed?

What the fuck am I doing?

Preparation

Emily

I don’t feel good. I chew nervously at my nails, trying my best to ignore the twisting and turning of my stomach. It’s not the map of the route Skull’s goons will be taking with Joel in the van or the fact there are rifles holding the sheet down on the coffee table. It’s knowing that at any minute Jai is going to walk out the door and I might not see him again. All three of them are dressed from head to toe in black, like robbers about to hit a bank. I eye up the stranger Ted let into the house. He calls him Huss. He’s tall —much taller than Jai—but just as wide. He doesn’t contribute to the conversation much and the way his steel grey stare occasionally flicks over me sets me on edge. His hair is cropped short on the top and shaved on the sides, exposing a large flaming skull. I slip the tip of a strawberry into my mouth and bite down. There’s something about this Huss I don’t like.

“Where’d you get the tattoo?” I blurt out.

Ted stops mid-sentence and looks at me over his shoulder. Jai does too. With a subtle smirk, Huss replies: “Why? Do you like it?”

“Not particularly.”

“Emily, c’mon.” Ted sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. “Not everyone with a skull tattoo works for him.”

Ted should be happy I’m turning my attention from him onto someone else. Ted has proven his loyalty so far and I trust Jai’s judgment. The thing is, Jai doesn’t know Huss. And that puts me on edge.

Jai turns his focus to Huss. “Answer her. When did you get it?”

Huss’s gray eyes dance between Jai and I, glistening with amusement.

“Mexico.” He states, his voice as rough as the thick stubble on his jaw. “On my twenty-third birthday six years ago. Happy?”

Ted laughs. “Don’t bother. There isn’t an answer in the world that can make her happy. I’ve tried them all.”

They laugh—even Jai looks over his shoulder at me with a smug grin. Hilarious. I continue to eat my strawberry. I’m sorry if a skull tattoo puts me on edge. Perhaps I should remind them of the person we’re going up against.

“Don’t sweat it, Ted.” I simper, dropping the end of the strawberry into my bowl. “Not all men have what it takes to make a woman happy.”

Jai and Huss laugh, leaving Ted looking rather betrayed.

“You don’t even know what I’ve got going on,” he says defensively with a scowl.

I wave him off as I pluck another strawberry and lift it to my lips.

“I can do shit you can’t imagine, shit that will change the way you look at them strawberries you seem to love so much.”

I close my mouth, unwilling to bite the berry while he’s grinning at me. Who the hell uses strawberries during sex? Who in their right mind would waste such a delicious fruit?

The boys quickly fall back into serious conversation. Guns and cars are mentioned every second sentence and that’s when I tune out. The thought of the dangerous, fast paced rescue is making me want to pass out. I have to admit they know their shit though. Listening to them map it out is like listening to a storyboard for an action movie being read aloud. I prefer it this way instead of being in the center of the action. They’ve ordered me to sit this one out and I have absolutely no quarrels with that. I’d only slow them down anyway. I’m not the fast-driving, gun-toting heroes they are. That being said, I wish I could be there with Jai. Sitting around an empty house waiting for him last time was stressful enough…this time will be unbearable.

“All right.” Ted announces, pushing himself to his feet. “Let’s do this.”

They gather their guns and clear the couch. With a shit-eating grin, Huss plucks a strawberry from my packet and pops it between his lips. I frown as it crunches between his teeth and he drops the end in my bowl.

“Don’t even go there, Huss. Jai will kick your ass.” Ted warns as he shoves him down the hall.

“They’re a thing?”

“I don’t know what they are, but they’re definitely fucking. No one stays cooped up in a lake house without having some crazy, sensual, sexy…”

Their discussion fades away as they exit the house and I’m kind of glad I don’t have to hear the end of it.

Jai stops in front of me, his dark, blue stare shooting down the hallway.

“I don’t like him.” He states, bringing his frown back to me.

Jealousy is an extremely sexy thing on the person you’re attracted to. The tension in their muscles, the frown in their brow and the clench of the jaw…I don’t know why, but it just gets me. Maybe it’s because I’ve never seen jealousy manifest over me before. The thought alone is enough to provoke a coy smile to tug at the corners of my mouth.

“Of course you don’t.”

Holding his gun below counter level, Jai leans close. He tucks a finger in the neck of my thin, cotton coat and pulls me forward. Captivated his smoldering stare, I go with it, allowing him to pull me in close.

“I’m coming back.” He mutters, his eyes flicking to my lips.

“I don’t doubt it.”

“When I get back we’re gonna talk.”

“Ooh.” I flick my eyebrows. “How vague.”

He zips forward, crushing his mouth to mine and kissing me with his dry lips. My heart races and the fear of never seeing him again grows exponentially.

The collar of my coat flicks back against my chest. If it didn’t I wouldn’t have even realized he released me.

“Before I forget…"

I turn and lean against the counter as he rounds the kitchen bench and stalks up to me. He pulls a black handgun out from underneath his shirt and sits it on the surface beside me. I don’t know what’s more terrifying; the fact there’s a gun less than five inches away from me or knowing that Jai thinks there’s a chance I’ll need to use it.

“You can take care of yourself while I’m gone?” He asks, his voice full of concern and compassion.

“Do you have a smaller gun?”

A smile twitches at his lips, but he manages to hold it back.

“Just remember what I told you and you’ll be fine.”

He smooths the back of his fingers over my cheek and it takes every fiber in my being not to take a hold of it and beg him not to go. Instead, I wrap my arms around his neck and wish him luck…

If only I had the courage to tell him how I really feel. If only I had the courage to let go of my doubts and let him have me the way he wants.

Bang

Jai

I’m so fucking ready. I’ve been waiting for this day for too damn long. I may have took the long way, but that doesn’t matter. What matters is I’m here now.

That’s all that counts.

“They’re late.” Huss murmurs from the driver’s seat as we sit parked on the side of the road. It’s a minimal traffic road concealed by dense shrubbery. Huss says the odds of someone stumbling upon the scene is minimal, making it the perfect place.

I don’t know much about Huss, A.K.A Jordan Husstel, but in the short time I’ve known him I’ve already compiled a list of things I hate about him. One: he’s a perfectionist. Everything has to go the way they’re supposed to. He frets about the slightest change. Apparently it makes him uncomfortable. I decided a long time ago that those who aren’t accepting of sudden change are weak and can’t be trusted. Two: he’s a ladies man—and not the good kind either. The stories Huss and Ted have exchanged are stories I would have reveled in once. Now Emily’s body and face is all I can picture. I can’t help but imagine her being disrespected in such a gut wrenching way by the men before me. Men who didn’t care about her the way I do now…it makes my finger twitch against my rifle’s trigger. Three—

“We shouldn’t waste any more time.” Ted announces, unclipping his seat belt. “Any second they’ll show. Let’s get into position.”

I pull my hood up around my face and tug on the door handle. Cold air blows in and I clench my rifle, pulling it close to my chest as the cold chills the tip of my nose and spreads across my cheeks. I kick the door shut and sprint as fast as I can until I’m one hundred and nine yards down the road. Ted is on my right, covering that side of the street. When I reach my mark, I rush into the forest and hide amongst the trees. Dry sticks and leaves crunch underneath my heavy boots, but they’re a whisper compared to the thrumming in my ears. Panting, I reach into the pocket of my black hood and pull out a red, laser pointer. I point it to the road and click the button three times. Right after me, Ted’s green laser streams across the road for three short clicks. I look to the car and Huss flicks the lights once.

Now we wait.

“Stone?”

I jump as Ted’s smooth voice barks through my walkie talkie. I inhale through my nose and blow it out, as I pull the bulky device from my pocket.

“You scared the shit out of me. What?”

I hear him laugh from across the road and I roll my eyes. So much for stealth.

“Do you remember that time you spilled coffee all down the front of Captain’s suit?”

I choke on a laugh, unable to help myself. It was my fourth day on the force and I got stuck doing the morning coffee run. I hadn’t known Ted then. He was transferred in the day before I started, and he was the loudest motherfucker laughing over the Captain’s shoulder as he cussed me out in front of everyone. Somehow we became friends after that.

“Yeah. I remember.”

“Good times. I miss you around the precinct, bro.”

I smile. If I’m being honest with myself I miss being there. Life was so much easier when I was writing up speeding fines and chasing down shoplifters. Life was easier when I was fighting someone else’s bad guy instead of hunting down my own. Back then, my problems ended with my shift. They didn’t follow me home and they sure as fuck didn’t haunt me in my dreams.

“Shit. There are headlights approaching. Nine o’clock.” Ted mumbles through the speaker.

My stomach flips and slams into every other organ in that vicinity, making me want to throw the fuck up. The plan is straightforward. Stop the van, kill whoever is driving, and grab Joel.

“They’re supposed to be coming from three, not nine. What the fuck is happening?” Huss growls through the radio.

I peer through a bush and see the headlights for myself. The vehicle is definitely a white van.

“Fuck.” I swear. “We need a new plan and quick.”

“No!” Huss shouts. “We stick to the plan.”

“Huss, we’re a hundred yards in the wrong direction. It isn’t going to work unless you hit them front on.” Ted warns.

The vehicle passes Ted and I. This is my only shot to get Joel back. I can’t give up now. I won’t. I leap from the bush and chase the van. My muscles burn immediately. No matter how fast I run, no matter how hard I pump my legs, the van gets further away. I’m not going to catch it. There’s no way.

“Jai? What the fuck are you doing?” Ted shouts after me, but I ignore him.

I bring the radio to my mouth. “Now, Huss!”

I expect him to let the van pass. It gets close, so close I stop running, my shoulders slump.

But then I hear the rev of the engine and the wheels as they spin against the dirt before he flicks the lights on and the car roars forward. Whoever is driving the van has no time to react and the sounds as the two blocks of thin metal and plastic slam together is deafening. The metal squeals as it twists together and all I can do is watch. This isn’t how it was supposed to go. There’s no denying our escape vehicle is completely totaled.

Panting, Ted stops beside me. “Huss!”

Nothing.

“Guns up.” I order. “Check the van.”

I pull the gun up, pressing the butt of the rifle firmly in the pocket of my shoulder. I relax my neck, letting my cheek fall to the stock, bringing my nose to the charging handle. We approach slowly, each step calculated and careful. It’s deafeningly quiet and the thick smell of oil and melting plastic hangs in the air.

I slip in front of Ted as I advance on the back of the van. Seven feet away the doors spring open and I’m caught off guard, like a fucking amateur, by two assholes holding shotguns.

Bang.

Bang.

Skull’s men crumble to the ground, one missing the van completely and crashing against the asphalt at my feet. I glance over my shoulder as Ted peers over the sight of his gun.

“Thanks.” I breathe out, my ears ringing with the shots.

“Take the left.” He states. “I’ll take the right.”

With a nod, I move to the left side of the van. There’s no movement—even as my fingers wrap around the cool metal of the handle. I keep my gun up, my finger half squeezing the trigger, and yank the door open.

“Ugh!” I grunt as a heavy, hard body slams into me, knocking the rifle from my hands.

The back of my skull hits the hard surface and we crash against the road as the rifle slides along the asphalt and into a ditch. A crippling pain sears over my skull and bears down in my eyes. My brain rolls in my head and my lungs fail to expand all the way underneath the weight of his body. His heavy hands are at my throat, his sharp knees digging into my stomach.

“Shoulda known you’d be here, motherfucker.” He growls, digging his thumbs into my throat as hard as he can.

I push on his biceps, but he doesn’t move because he has the more dominant position. I gasp for air. Oh, fuck this. I will not die tonight.

I flick my hips, throwing the asshole off me. Already weakened by the crash, he loses his grip and is thrown three feet to my left. I roll onto my stomach as cold air floods my lungs, making me feel nauseous. I take a second to regain my equilibrium while the asshole who got the jump on me groans and clenches his face. I spit, then stumble over to my rifle and pick it up off the ground. It vibrates in my hand, forcing energy into my bloodstream. As I approach him, I point the gun at his face. He lowers his hands. His face, the one that was just contorted in hate and anger, is now soft and pleading.

“Please.” He begs, his voice thick and hoarse. “I have children.”

I press the tip of my gun to his forehead. If that’s true I’ll be doing his kids a favor by blowing his head clean off. No one can use them as leverage if he’s dead.

“If I let you live Skull will kill you himself — your children, too.” I push the gun harder. “I’d be doing them a favor.”

“Jai!” Ted shouts at me.

I don’t tear my eyes off the man I’m about blast from this world. “They have backup close by. We gotta go.”

Maybe I shouldn’t kill this guy…maybe it’ll send a bigger message if I leave one of them alive.

“Put a bullet in his head, Stone.” Huss groans from somewhere. He coughs and splutters. “He’s seen our faces. If you let him go, we’ll lose everything.”

That’s all that needs to be said. I squeeze the trigger.

Bang.

Blood splatters up my arm, the rest of it on the road, as his mangled head smashes against the street. Ted and Huss have risked everything for this moment. If they want him dead? Done. No questions asked. I had reservations about Huss’s loyalty earlier on, but after tonight I consider him as loyal as they come.

Silence.

I turn my attention to Ted. He gives me a confident nod, but his lips are sad. His eyes drowning in regret. Behind him, Huss slides his bloodied body against the van. His clothes are ripped, exposing patches of clean and inked skin. The light of the moon shines down through the thin canopy and the dark blood on his face is visible. It runs from his head and his nose, it gushes from his stomach and his thigh, and it drips from his left arm. An arm that is so obviously broken it sends bile into my throat.

“Jesus, fuck.” I swear, stepping toward him.

He grunts in pain as he turns toward the open passenger door.

“I’m all right.”

“Shit. We need to get you to a hospital.” Ted says, running a nervous hand over his face.

“I said I’m all right.” He hisses through clenched teeth. “Just get me back to the lake. I’ll take care of it there.” He turns his blood shot eyes on me. “Check on your brother.”

Right. Joel. I jog around to the back of the van as Huss explains to Ted that he set up a secondary car an hour north of here. I have to hand it to him, he’s thought of everything. Maybe these OCD people aren’t so bad after all.

I pull myself into the back of the van and there he is, tied to the side of the van, gagged and unconscious. His grey tank and black jeans are filthy, torn in some places and caked in mud. I’m frozen in place. It feels like a dream…I never thought I’d see my big brother ever again. Slowly, I lower my rifle to the floor and turn to shut the doors behind me. When they click firmly into place, a faint blue light brightens the space. That’s when I notice the blood trickling down the back of his neck.

I rush forward and crouch low to grab his face.

“Joel?” I tap his cheek.

Nothing. Shit.

I press my fingers to his pulse. It’s soft, but it’s there. I exhale as relief floods my entire body.

I did it. Joel has been found. I drop and rest my head on my knees. The sounds of metal peeling from metal dig their way into my brain, making me shudder. Thank God the van is still drivable or we’d be screwed—and not in a good way.

I lift my head to look at Joel as my body gently rocks from side to side with the movement of the moving vehicle. I almost don’t recognize him.

“You silly mother fucker.” I mumble. “What have you done to yourself?”

Joel Stone

Emily

My nerves are heightened. Really heightened. It’s dark and I can’t see a damn thing. Not a wall or a piece of furniture, and it throws my senses off. What are the odds of a power failure on the night Jai leaves to steal his brother back from Skull? Either someone knows I’m here or the universe is fucking with me. I hold the gun out in front of me, but it shakes tremendously, following the movements of my hands. Why didn’t I go with them? Why did I think staying here, in a strange house, all alone was a good idea? I press my back against the hallway wall and shut my eyes. The trees outside are blowing in the wind. Some brush against the house while others creak, groan, and tease me. Where the hell are they? They’ve been gone for hours. I’d sleep the endless minutes away, but I can’t. I can’t sleep peacefully knowing they’re out there. They could be injured. They could be dead.

Next comes a sound that chills me to the bone. The sound of squeaky brakes and the gentle hum of an engine. My heart stutters, stops, and then picks back up at an erratic pace. What do I do? I glance down the pitch black hallway to the back door. I can’t make it there safely. God knows what I’ll impale myself on. I swallow hard, then exhale through my nose. The house is dark, meaning whoever enters won’t be able to see a thing either and I’ll bet a lot of money whoever it is didn’t bring a flashlight with them. I creep toward the front door. If I can get the drop on them there’s a good chance I will survive. If I don’t…then I’m as good as dead.

Pulling the white, lace curtain aside I peer out into the yard. Under a murky storm light I see the car that pulled up. A black SUV. My blood runs cold.

That’s not their car. The doors open and I jolt away from the window, pulling the gun into my chest as if it will stop my heart from beating its way out of my chest. I stick my hand out and run my palm along the wall as I make my way back towards the kitchen. I stop at the end of the hall and squint, desperate to see what’s between me and the back door.

In no time the footsteps are on the front porch. They’re heavy and uneven, but full of purpose.

“Why are the lights out?” Someone asks in a throaty, pained groan.

I don’t recognize the voice. I whip around and point my gun to the front door…or wherever I think the front door is. My finger trembles on the trigger. My stomach and heart fight their way for the prime position in my throat. I’m going to fucking puke.

The crappy metal handle jostles and I nervously lick my lips as I lock my elbows—just like Jai taught me. The door opens. Soft light floods in. In panic, I shut my eyes and squeeze the trigger. The shot rings out and the gun kicks back.

“Fuck! Emily!”

That voice! I know that voice.

I gasp. “Jai?”

“I can’t see anything.” And there’s Ted.

“The lights went out a little while ago.” I breathe, unable to put a lid on my excitement.

“I’ll check the box.” Ted announces.

I hear a pained hiss before Ted’s boots on the porch again.

“Is everyone okay?” I ask through the darkness.

Huss laughs once. “More or less.”

Anxiety rises in me. What will I see when the lights are turned on? There’s a heavy panting in the background somewhere—it’s thick and filled with pain.

“More or less?”

The lights flick on and just about burns my eyes out of their sockets. Squinting, the men in front of me come into focus. The first man I see is unconscious. Jai holds him upright as best he can, but there’s nothing to stop his chin from touching his chest. A torn, gray tank top, covered in mud and blood and a pair of black, ripped jeans caked in more blood as its busted hems hang over the top of worn, brown boots.

Joel. I assume.

His appearance isn’t what I expected at all…where Jai has clean, un-inked skin Joel is covered. A human canvas.

He’s leaner than Jai…but that could be because he was held as a prisoner for God knows how long.

My stare flicks to Jai. He’s in one piece—just the way I like him.

“Huss might need your help.” Jai says, taking a slight step to the right.

My mouth drops open and I clench my chest. How does he look worse than Joel? He looks as if he barely escaped an industrial sized blender.

“What the hell happened to you?”

“It’s just a scratch.” He squeezes out, his eyes shut tightly.

I place the gun on the kitchen bench as Jai drags Joel’s body down the hall towards the couch. Huss attempts to follow, but he can’t do much with only the wall as support. He shouts in pain, making me jump. I rush down to help him, but Ted beats me to it.

“You need a damn doctor.” Ted orders as he supports Huss’ waist.

It’s good to see Ted in perfect health. How did Huss cop the most damage?

Huss shakes his head. “No doctors, asshole. How many times do I gotta tell you?”

“I’m no doctor—actually, I’m barely a nurse—but I’m sure I can help.”

“Better than nothing.” Jai states.

His hand slides around my waist and I turn to face him as he pulls me into his body. He’s covered in blood…and I couldn’t care less.

“You did it.” I utter, making him smile.

I wrap my arms around his neck and stand on the tips of my toes. I go to kiss him…only there’s a warm, sticky liquid clinging to my forearms. I lower myself and pull my arms back. Fresh blood.

“You’re bleeding.”

He reaches behind his head and touches it. “I hit my head.”

“You hit your head? Are you okay? Does it hurt? Is your skull still intact?”

“Well, I didn’t fall into a coma at any point during the drive so I’d say I’m all good.” He plants a quick kiss on my mouth. “I’m gonna shower.”

Shower? Doesn’t he want to sit first and, I don’t know, maybe have a beer?

“Emily, over here.” Ted calls and I turn towards the kitchen bench.

Huss is propped up on one of the stools, his broken arm lying flat on the hard surface. It’s set in place. I shiver. Funnily enough, scrapes, cuts and broken bones creep me out. Saliva pools in my mouth, paving way for the stomach acid that will surely follow if I don’t get a handle on my shit. I remember my first day in a hospital ward. I was watching a nurse undress a festering bullet wound. The man had been treating it with alcohol prior to him showing up on the hospital’s doorstep…and not the cleansing kind. I still remember him slurring “I thought beer’d be ‘nough” as she pulled off his homemade flannel bandage. I felt my face turn as green as his flesh and I puked all over the floor. His laugh followed me down the hall as I was sent home. I got better at it, but there are certain things that still bother me. Like sliced skin. Shudder.

“Let me grab the first-aid kit.”

If I recall correctly, I saw a first-aid kit in the upstairs bathroom. It wasn’t overly large, but I’m sure it has a needle and thread. For everything else, he should see a doctor. I can’t cast broken bones.

I walk as quickly as I can up the stairs and into the bathroom. Steam billows from the door, the fast jets of water sounding like heavy rain against the tiles. I push the door open and step inside. The air is heavy and warm making the thin, untamed strands of my hair stick to my damp forehead. I cross the bathroom and crouch low at the white basin. In the cupboard underneath, amongst all the strange bottles of moisturizer and other body creams, I find the small, plastic first-aid container. I grab it and leave without bothering Jai. I suspect he might need a little time to come to terms with what he’s achieved.

Downstairs, Huss is looking pale. Beside him, Ted sits, his face slack with exasperation. I offer him a sympathetic smile.

“There’s a spare room by the front door. Why don’t you get some rest?”

His thick, black eyebrows smooth out in relief. “You don’t need my help?”

I shake my head. “Not really. Not unless you want to hold the skin together while I stitch it.”

He slips from his stool. “By the front door, did you say?”

I smile. “Yeah.”

Ted drags himself down the hall without a glance over his shoulder. I sit the first-aid kit on the kitchen bench and slide onto the stool in front of Huss.

“What happened?” I ask, popping the lid of the kit.

I sift through useless bandages and cotton balls. At the very bottom I find a hook and thread.

“The plan was to nudge the van in the ass.” He states. “But it was coming from the wrong direction. I made the choice to slam into it front on.”

I open the needle and thread packet. Then stop. I lift my stare to his. “You risked your life to help Jai save his brother?”

His face contorts in pain and he holds his breath, only to let it go a few minutes later. “I guess I did.”

“Why?” I ask, attaching the thread to the needle.

I search through the kit again looking for some kind of anesthetic or topical numbing gel.

Nothing.

“Because I knew it was our only shot. If I didn’t, he’d never see his brother again.”

“Why do you care? You didn’t know Jai before today.”

“No. I didn’t…” His steel gray eyes bore into mine. “But I know what it’s like to lose a brother. I know the pain that comes with it.”

“You’ve lost a brother?”

He drops his gaze to his legs. “Sargent Thomas Husstel. Afghanistan in oh-nine.”

I swallow. “I’m sorry.”

Huss smiles. “It’s all right. There’s nothing either of us can do now.”

I peel a pair of gloves from their packet and slide them on. I eye the slice on his forearm. It’s the biggest so that’s where I’ll start.

“I don’t have any numbing gel so this is going to sting a little bit.”

He tilts his head and closes his eyes. I guess that’s my cue to go ahead with it. I tear open the foil to an alcohol wipe and dab it along the slice in his arm.

“What will work say about your current state? I assume they’re smart men. They might put two and two together.”

Huss tenses with a hiss and more blood leaks out. “I’m on leave. I go back in—uhh—four weeks.”

Lucky for us.

Holding my breath, I push the hook through his flesh and pull it together. Tuning out his groans, I repeat the step over…

And over…

And over…

And over…until blood stops trickling freely from the gash. I stitch five cuts of varying degrees by the time Jai drags himself downstairs again. When he comes, I’m putting the third and final stitch in Huss’s side. I lift my gaze as Jai saunters over to the fridge and retrieves a bottle of water. When I drop the needle onto the pile of discarded alcohol wipes and foil wrappers, Huss exhales.

“You did a good job at keeping the bone straight.” I say, pointing to the thick stick he chose to immobilize the movement. “But you need to have a cast put on it so the bone sets and heals where it should.”

He nods. “Tomorrow. Any pain killers in that magic box of yours?”

I pull off my gloves and dump them on the discard pile I’ve created. Surprisingly enough, at the very bottom of the first-aid container is a little orange tube. I read the label.

Percocet.

Don’t the owners of the house know they should dispose of any leftover pills? I guess I shouldn’t complain. They’re really going to help him. I pop the lid and spill a few into the palm of my hand.

“Are you allergic to acetaminophen or oxycodone?”

He shakes his head.

“Have you recently ingested alcohol, sedatives, tranquilizers, or other narcotic medications?”

“Just give me the damn pills, Emma.” He grunts, a shaky palm outstretched.

I look to Jai and he nods so I dump a pill into his hand.

“It’s Emily, by the way. Not Emma.”

Huss scowls up at me, ignoring my correction. “One? I was in a bloody car accident and you’re only going to give me one?”

I drop another into his hand as Jai pours him a glass of water. He slides the glass across the bench as Huss tosses the pills to the back of his throat and drowns them with the water before swallowing, He grabs his half full glass and saunters over to the second couch. I watch, feeling a little bad for him while he groans and complains as he lowers himself onto the couch.

“Come on.” Jai mutters, taking a swig of water. “Let them rest.”

I tuck the pills back into the box and close the lid. Jai leans across the bench and gathers the used medical supplies and dumps them in the bin as I head for the stairs. I climb them, step by step, as he washes his hands in the sink.

Upstairs the air feels colder. It seeps through my sweat pants and matching black hoodie. I turn on the bathroom light and step inside. After I put the kit away I wash my hands and re-enter the bedroom just as Jai closes the door. I see the tired slump in his shoulders and the sluggish way he drags his feet. He must be exhausted.

“How’s your head?” I ask, whipping my hoodie off and exposing my bare breasts.

His gaze flits over them before he looks me in the eyes. “It’s stopped bleeding.”

I smile. “Good.”

My nipples harden to a painful point, causing goosebumps to tear across my skin. So. Fucking. Cold. I like sleeping naked when it’s cold—especially with Jai. It forces us to snuggle.

I slide my pants down my legs and step out of them as Jai pulls his tight, long sleeved shirt over his head. I tug back the cover and we climb in, snuggling down underneath them.

“Finally.” I sigh, shuddering at the cold sheets.

They feel like ice on my skin.

When we first arrived here, the beds were too soft. Now they’re heaven. I’ve never slept on a surface as comfortable as this.

Butterflies release themselves into my stomach as Jai’s arms surround me and he pulls me close. He’s warm, like fresh bread on a cold winter’s day. The tip of my nose presses into his chest as he buries his nose in my hair.

“You smell good.” He mutters, his thumb stroking my waist.

I smile. “Thank you.”

Silence fills the room. This is a strange turn out. I expected Jai to be popping champagne corks when he brought Joel home, but it’s the complete opposite. It’s almost…somber.

“Are you happy?” I ask as I tilt my head up, forcing his lips to press against my forehead.

He holds me tighter. “With you?”

“With tonight.”

He swallows hard and, somehow, it echoes around the room.

“I killed a man…” He swallows again. “In cold blood.”

I sling my arm over his waist and hold him tight. I open my mouth. I just know I’m going to regret the next few words that come out of my mouth.

“Tell me about it.”

He shakes his head. “You don’t want to hear it.”

“I do.”

Jai’s chest abruptly expands as he inhales long and heavy. Then he blows it out, deflating his chest in a rush.

“Long story short, he attacked me and we fell to the ground. He had the upper hand. He squeezed my throat, clutching hard until I couldn’t suck in the slightest bit of air. Eventually, I fought him off, grabbed my gun and then pointed it straight at his head…”

He shifts, pulling me in until the entire left side of my face is squished against his chest.

“…and I guess the ending tells itself.”

I guess it does. I can picture it all so clearly in my mind.

Fists.

Blood.

Bang.

Splatter.

I bet he didn’t hesitate. I bet he didn’t even think twice about it…even so, I can still hear the regret weighing on him now.

“I was a police officer…” He mutters. “I shouldn’t have done it.”

“It was for the greater good.” I reassure him. “You did what needed to be done.”

He doesn’t respond. Silence ‘the conversation killer’ strikes again.

“I wanted to talk when I got back…” He mutters, his exhaustion becoming prominent in his tone.

“About what?”

“Us.”

I let my fingers dance up his side. “You’re tired and you need your rest. Can we take a rain check?”

I hear him smile. “Fine.”

Not long after that, his chest slows. His breaths are longer, more peaceful. I snuggle in close as my eyelids are pulled down with the weight of a truck behind it. It’s futile to even attempt to reopen them so I don’t bother. Instead, I focus on the sound of his pounding heart. A heart that belongs to me.

A heart that is mine.

Never Ending

Jai

Breakfast.

The most delicious meal of the day.

Gripping the handle on the pan, I shut off the stove and dump the bacon onto a plate. It’s crispy and perfect. Everything a strip of bacon should be. I can eat clean without any complaints…until bacon shows up. Bacon is my weakness. Bacon makes me happy even when I have a killer headache and sore muscles.

I transfer the greasy pan to the sink and glance out the window. It’s eleven a.m. the sun is well and high in the sky now. The dewy morning feel has melted away.

Ted and Huss left early in the morning, or so their note said. Ted has taken Huss to a clinic an hour from here to get the proper care he needs. Emily did a great job on patching him up, but her hands were tied when it came to his broken arm.

I leave the sink and abandon the kitchen for a second so I can use the bathroom. When I come back I spot Emily sitting on the couch beside Joel. His face is covered in coarse hair, matted with dry blood. I wonder what he went through…what he suffered through before I rescued him. The ink on his arms doesn’t pertain to a one particular thing. There isn’t a theme. I see an even mixture of stars, skulls, naked women, and words. I glance at his hands. Even they’re tattooed.

“He didn’t look like that the last time I saw him.” I tell her and she jumps, whipping her head in my direction.

“The facial hair?” She asks and I shrug.

“Everything.”

Emily pushes off of the couch and saunters over to me. Her dark hair is messy in the sexiest way. Her brown irises are alert and her skin is refreshed.

“You made breakfast.”

I laugh. “You sound surprised. I always make breakfast.”

“That’s true.” She replies with a chuckle.

She wraps her arms around my neck and plants a soft, playful kiss on my lips. I love it when she does that. I slide my arms around her waist and rest them on the curve of her backside. Her body mass has increased and her curves are slightly more prominent. I love that too.

“So this is what you’ve been up to while I’ve been locked away.”

I freeze as Emily’s body tightens against mine. How long has it been since I’ve heard his voice? I’m tossed back years into the past. I lift my stare to Joel as he stretches his arms above his head, wincing. I almost don’t recognize him. The black, messy hair and tattoos from the beginning of his neck to the tips of his toes. If it weren’t for the dark blue eyes and familiar smile I’d have sworn we brought home the wrong man.

“You finally learned how to cook.” He says, rubbing the palm of his hand over his stomach.

“I had to. For Jessica’s sake.”

Joel flinches and I let Emily go. She slips her arms from my neck and stands beside me. She grazes the tips of her fingers against my forearm as a hurricane of emotions whirl inside me. I imagined this moment to be nothing short of a celebration, but as I watched him all the way from the pick-up point to the lake house negative emotions began to manifest. If he wasn’t already so beat up, I’d punch him square in the face.

“I'm sorry, Jai. It took longer than I anticipate…I got caught up.”

I scoff. “In drugs and murder?”

“In a girl.” He clarifies. “Monique.”

A fucking girl? “I hope she was worth it.”

“She was.” His blue eyes drop from mine for a split second. “She is…I have to go back for her. I can’t leave her there.” He frowns. “With him.”

“Him?” Emily asks, but I don’t need the clarification.

Skull.

What he said about Joel is true? He took Skull’s woman? Monique is the girl Joel fell in love with?

“Are you out of your fucking mind? Of all the girls you could have had you chose his?”

“I didn’t choose anything. It just happened.” He glances between Emily and me. “Clearly I don’t have to explain the details to you.”

Joel exhales. “I’ll stay for a few days, but then I gotta go back into New York.”

I frown. “You're serious? About going back for her?”

“Skull has something of mine…and I need to get it back.”

Emily

Jai snaps forward, but I snag his wrist, preventing him from closing the distance between him and his brother.

“Are you out of your fucking mind?” Jai growls.

Under my fingers his tendons move erratically as he clenches his fist.

“You can help me or I can do it alone.”

“You’re not serious?” I look at Jai. “Tell me you’re not considering this.”

Jai’s jaw tightens and then relaxes. I know the look—the look of reluctant contemplation.

“Fine.” He states, his voice flat. “We’ll help you.”

I let Jai go as Joel beams at him and steps forward. He pulls his little brother into a hug…and I feel like throwing up.

I can’t fucking believe it. I press my fingers against my mouth.

We’re not finished with Skull.

Suffering

Jai

She shivers under the gentle brush of my lips as I glide them along her ribcage. The very tip of my cock slides in and out of her tight, wet pussy and a groan releases itself from my throat. It’s only the tip and I already want to fill her up. Being in her is my favorite part of the day. Together we are absolute perfection.

Yin and Yang.

Water and fire.

She pushes her fingers through my hair, gripping slightly every time her hips flex against mine. From the harsh, fast pace of her breathing to the slick sweat on her skin, I live for it now. I have my brother. I got him back from Skull just like I said I would and on the way, I found her.

Emily.

Kitten.

Mine.

I’m at peace with it now—our predicament with Skull. The thirst for his blood no longer rages in my veins and my pride is sated enough to leave the country where we have a better chance at surviving. We could be gone. We could be living in a distant country with no worries in the world…except Joel is hell bent on rescuing his woman—a woman he took from Skull in the first place. I’ve tried talking him out of it. I’ve reasoned with him until I turned blue in the face, but there’s no changing his mind. Stubbornness is a Stone family trait.

He claims he’s in love with Monique. He claims he’ll marry her and they’ll have children. The thought of it is enough to make me want to roll my eyes. It all seems a little “whirlwind” to me, but what can I do? If I say anything to him he flips it back on me, comparing my relationship with Emily to his relationship with Monique. They’re not even remotely the same. Emily didn’t belong to a powerful crime lord when we met—though I’m certain Skull begs to differ.

If I’m being honest, I don’t recognize my brother anymore. He’s covered in tattoos. They blacken every limb and paint every inch, leaving his face untouched. He admitted to murdering a lot of people—bad people—but people none-the-less. He drinks a fuck load, despite always being against alcohol, and he apparently has grown accustom to snorting cocaine. In retrospect, he’s a stranger with the same name as my brother.

“Hey...”

Her soft whisper and the touch of her warm hands as they glide over my jaw and onto my cheeks pulls me out of my head. It’s a place I haven’t been able to escape since the night we saved Joel…and I’m suffering because of it, drowning in an abyss of irrationality.

“What are you thinking about?” She asks, her pretty eyes shining with concern in the early morning light.

I watched her sleep last night since my brain refused to allow me a few minutes of peace of my own. It was the first time I regretted the mission I set myself on. Why? Because I’ve selfishly fucked a lot of lives and for what? Joel didn’t want to be saved. He hasn’t said it, but I see it in his face. All he cares about is Skull’s whore. A whore who is probably as fucked up as Skull is. I don’t want to save her. Is that selfish?

“Nothing.” I say.

I shake my head and lean closer, planting three soft kisses up her neck and onto her jaw.

With a defeated sigh, she pushes the palms of her hands against my chest, but I don’t budge.

Instead, I trail my hungry lips to her mouth and catch her bottom lip between my teeth. She pulls away with a wince, pushing hard against my chest.

“Jai.”

Sighing, I slip from her body and roll onto my back as Emily climbs off the bed and drags herself to the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

Rubbing my tongue against the roof of my mouth, I follow a crack in the paint on the ceiling.

This is the fourth time in three days I’ve zoned out during sex and I do believe that was the last straw. Fuck, I can’t help it. I can’t get out of my own head. I’ve tried, but it’s like pushing a bicycle through wet, sticky tar.

What pisses me off the most is the fact Joel hasn’t asked about Jessica yet. He has no idea she’s in Italy. He has no idea she’s even alive and do you think I’ve received a thank you for saving his pathetic ass? No. I only ruined my career and risked my life in the process. Is that not worthy of a thank you?

I’m doing it again, aren’t I? I’m drowning in my own thoughts.

Exhaling, I kick my sweatpants down the remainder of my legs and off the side of the bed before rolling on to my side. As I stare at the blaring, red numbers on the alarm clock sitting on my bedside table. Its eight a.m. already? Then the smells hit me and swirl around my nostrils, making my empty stomach clench. It’s yet another thing new Joel is addicted to that old Joel hated—greasy, fried breakfast foods. If you told me two years ago I’d be eating breakfast with a cocaine snorting, breakfast loving, tattoo enthusiast of a brother, I’d have laughed in your face. Oh, but how quickly the impossible becomes possible.

The sound of shower jets blasting water against tiles forces me to push my naked ass off the bed and onto my feet. As I walk, I feel my body pull itself into a negative posture—shoulders slumped, chin dropped, feet dragging. I can’t kick it. I’ve punched, fucked, and ran for my life, but it’s still inside me—the bitterness, the anger—it lurks like cancer, growing as rapid and as aggressive as a tumor.

And I can’t talk to him about it because talking to him about this whole situation is like standing too close to a lit firecracker and knowing it can go off at any second.

I slide the base of my feet against the plush carpet and approach the bathroom door. As I slip the curved, stainless steel handle into my hand, I pause. What will I say? She’s never walked out on me before so I’m guessing “sorry about that” won’t fix anything this time.

I don’t want to tell her I’m embarrassed. I worked up the reunion with Joel in my head for so long...it was supposed to be different. It wasn’t supposed to leave me wondering why I even bothered saving him in the first place.

I push on the handle and open the door. Steam rushes out to meet my naked body and it clings to my skin, sending a rush of goosebumps across my torso. She turns her back to me, smoothing her hands over her dark, wet hair as I slip inside the room and close the door.

I hate fighting with Emily. I mean, she’s not exactly the easiest woman to deal with and the girl can hold a grudge for days. If I don’t fix this now, she’ll ignore me until the end of time.

As I pull open the shower door, puffs of thick steam billow out and Emily turns her back to me. Shivering, I slip inside and close the door behind me. Inside, heat engulfs me, eradicating my goosebumps one by one, until I’m as warm as asphalt under the morning sun.

“You’re ignoring me?” I ask as I reach for the pink exfoliating sponge she requested I have Ted pick up from the store two days ago. Apparently, she could still feel the grime from the tunnels on her skin and needed to clean it from her pores.

Emily slips out from underneath the jet of water and runs her soapy hands along her stomach.

No response.

I reach for the berry body wash, pour it on to the rough sponge, and soap it up in my hands as she pulls her long, dark hair to the side, exposing the soft curve of her shoulder.

I hold the sponge in my hand, refusing to press it against her skin. “Emily?”

She glances over her shoulder, her dark eyes thinning into that sexy glare I liked so much when I met her.

“Yes. I’m ignoring you.”

Unexpectedly, she whips around on her heel, making me paint soap over her bare breasts. Her eyes are wide and the tip of her pointy, slender nose is as red as her rosy cheeks.

“Is it me?”

I pull the sponge from her chest and clench it in my hand. From the pressure, bubbles spill over and drop onto my foot.

I almost laugh. “What?”

She avoids my eyes, her worried expression now directed at the tiles. “Is it me?”

“I thought you were ignoring me?”

Emily exhales, annoyed. “Jai...”

I drop the sponge and reach out to her with my soapy hands. I glide my palms up her slim forearms and grip her small biceps in my hand.

“Is what you?”

She slips away from me, pulling her biceps from my grasp. If someone became homeless every time this girl confused the shit out of me, just about every house in the world would be empty.

“What are you talking about?”

She gestures to me. “You! You’re a ten, pushing eleven and I’m what? A four at best?”

I frown, confused. If she answered my question directly we’d be on the same page right now and since when did people rate the appearance of others on a scale of one to ten? It’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard, considering everyone has different tastes. I might be a ten to Emily, but a three to someone else. The same goes for her. She might be a four to one guy, but she’s a million to me. Easy.

“A four? What—”

She purses her lips and chews the inside of her lip. “Is it something I’m doing? Is it me?”

“No. No. It’s not you.”

Fuck, she’s cute—even when her hair is slicked back against her head like that. A smile pulls at the corners of my mouth and I can’t stop it. I like the balloon of happiness that inflates in my chest at the thought of her giving a shit.

“Kitten—baby—relax.” I step closer to her as she swipes at a drop of water that runs down the slope of her nose.

“Am I too aggressive? Too plain?” She glances down at her body. “Maybe I’m too skinny?”

She looks at me, her eyes wide. “Or maybe I’m too fat—assuming you’ve dated tiny models in the past. Or may—why are you smiling at me?”

“Because you’re being crazy.”

“Crazy?”

I nod. “Yes. Crazy.”

As if she has anything to worry about. She is everything I want in a woman. She is intelligent, strong, humorous, beautiful, and loyal. The shape and density of her body doesn’t matter to me. I smooth my hands over the subtle curve of her hips and onto her round ass, pulling her hard against me. She gasps as my naked body slides effortlessly against hers and I dance my fingers up her spine, unrelenting, until she shivers against me.

“Jai…” She sighs, relaxing into my fingers as I slip them into her hair and tug her head back.

“There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you.” I say, lowering my mouth to her jaw. “You drive me wild. I could come just looking at you.”

Pulling back, she cocks a brow. “There has to be something wrong with me if I can’t keep you interested during sex.”

I release my fingers from her hair. “It’s not you. I’m just...”

How do I tell her? How do I tell her that I’m a fucking idiot? That this was all for nothing and we’ll probably all die trying to save Joel’s woman? We’ve had too many close calls with Skull. We’ve pushed our luck too many times. He’s been in this game longer than we have. It’s only a matter of time before he outsmarts us and after snatching Joel out from underneath him, I can’t imagine him forgetting about us.

“When does it end?” I ask, planting a gentle kiss on her damp cheek.

Emily frowns. “Sex?”

“No. Not sex. Joel. Skull. When does it end?”

“It doesn’t end...” She says, brushing wet strands of hair from her cheek. “Until Skull is dead we’ll never be free.”

Emily speaks the truth and, if I’m being honest, the truth has never sounded so terrifying. I inhale, filling my lungs with heavy steam. I’m not scared of much…but being the reason someone else suffers is something I can’t handle. Exhaling, I slip my arms around her waist.

“What do you think I should do?”

Emily chews the inside of her lip, apparently contemplating my question. I want her to forbid me from helping Joel and to beg me not to go back for Monique. I want her to ask me to run away with her, like she did before we saved Joel. I refused then, but now…now I just might go for it.

“Well…” She clears her throat. “Would you go back for me?”

“Without a doubt.”

She bites a smile that tries to spread across her lips. “He loves her and, from what I can tell, he’d die for her. Whether or not that influences your decision, I don’t know.”

I tilt my head. “So, you’re saying I should to it for love?”

She shrugs her slender shoulders. “I’m saying your brother won’t feel complete unless he has her. Imagine how he feels right now? Knowing the love of his life is being held captive by another man—a man like Skull, no less. It makes me sick.”

I pull her in, pressing her cheek against my chest, resting my chin on the top of her head. I reflect back on Joel’s behavior the past few days. He doesn’t sleep, he spaces out, and has extreme bouts of anger. Twice I’ve walked in on him, his eyes red-rimmed and wet. He loves her. He loves her harder than I’ve seen him love anything and with or without me, he’s going back for the girl.

Brothers

Emily

I finish running the towel over my hair and drop it to the floor. A spattering of droplets coat the bathroom mirror and I lean in close to check the skull tattoo on my collarbone. It has healed completely, its black ink marking my skin for the rest of my life. I scratch at it.

Yep. It’s real.

I don’t know why I keep expecting it to rub off. I suck air into my cheeks and blow it out. I fucking hate it. I hate that it’s a skull and what it represents.

Fear and possession.

It’s the symbol of a psychopath who suffered through a horrific, unspeakable tragedy and decided to do unto others as he had done unto him. It’s sick. To make others feel the pain he felt in the moment his wife and his unborn baby were ripped from his life is...is…not something I want to think about before breakfast. Anything Skull related usually has the power to turn my stomach and, since the smell of bacon hangs so deliciously in the air, I don’t want that to happen this morning.

Sighing, I pluck the purple hair brush from the basin and run it through my long hair. It catches on tangles and knots, but, with a little girl power, I manage to brush them free. I don’t usually put a lot of effort into my morning rituals, but since Jai’s brother ‘moved’ in I feel the need to try a little harder. It’s kind of stupid, but I want to be up to par with the standards he undoubtedly has for his baby brother.

Placing the brush on the basin, I stick my fingers in my hair and give it a little shake, adding just the right amount of ‘mess’. I don’t want to look like I spent too much time on my appearance intentionally. I lean in close to the mirror, checking the light touch of make-up I applied. I never thought I’d ever admit it, but the right mascara can do wonders for a plain face.

I straighten my spine, flick my long, dark hair over my shoulders, and smooth my palms down the front of my worn, black Lynyrd Skynyrd tee. It’s my favorite. I stole it from a guy I slept with once when I was a slightly younger, slightly stupider, woman. To be honest, it was the highlight of my year—the shirt, not the sex. Everything about the sex was “mediocre”. If you know what I mean.

Leaving the bathroom, I follow the smell of breakfast foods all the way to the kitchen. I feel the tension in the air as soon as I enter the room. It’s thick. Suffocating. I didn’t expect to see so much hostility between the brothers. The way Jai described his relationship with his brother was a bond unlike any other. I assumed Joel was his best friend.

Not anymore, apparently.

Disappointment exudes from Jai in waves as he rest on his elbow, lightly stabbing his fork into a slice of banana. The mood in the room is depressing and awkward, dampening my joy of the breakfast foods laid out on the bench in front of me. Like Jai, Joel also has a knack for cooking. Since being here at the lake house I’ve put on weight. It’s not much, but my hip bones aren’t as sharp as they were weeks ago and my face is fuller. I kind of like the look. It’s the body of a woman who is well looked after and, dare I say it without jinxing myself, happy.

At the stove, Joel has his back to me as he fries up what smells a little something like salmon. Like Jai, Joel keeps himself in fantastic condition. His body is an orgy of muscle. He’s taller than Jai, but not by much and while Jai’s muscles are built wide, making him thick, Joel is lean.

I glance at the ink on Joel’s back. It’s a picture—a mixture of black ink and shadows with light smatterings of color.

Skulls and fire.

Men and women.

Vicious murder and total anarchy.

Joel glances over the curve of his shoulder from the stove. Dark circles surround his eyes. I guess he’s still not getting much sleep.

“Good morning.”

Immediately, I drop my stare to the bench, heat flaring into my cheeks.

“Good morning.” I say, making it my mission to sound extra chipper instead of disturbed as hell by the tattoos on his back.

I have one tattoo—one—and it hurt like hell. How’d he bring himself to cover his entire body? How long did it take? How much did it cost? I peer up at him and he tilts his head on the slightest angle, analyzing me with his dark blue eyes—eyes that match his brothers. Did he notice my gawking?

“You don’t like tattoos?” He asks, looking back to the pan.

He slips a long, metal spatula underneath a slice of salmon and flips it. While he’s preoccupied, I glance at Jai and he rolls his eyes. My lips pull at the corners as he takes a large mouthful of water out of his cup, and pulls out the stool beside him.

“Sure.” I reply, circling the bench and slipping on to the stool. “I like yours just fine.”

With a genuine smile, Joel pulls the pan off the heat and approaches us before dumping a heap of salmon on to a small plate. I glance over the bench. Does he expect the three of us to eat all of this food? There’s too much. Bacon, salmon, scrambled eggs, sausages, and pancakes. Where does he expect us to store it all?

“Good. Maybe you can convince my brother here that tattoos don’t make me a monster.”

Jai frowns, his jaw tightening. “I never said they make you a monster. I said—”

“It smells good.” I cut in, not wanting to be stuck in the middle of another one of their never-ending arguments.

Joel and Jai watch as I pluck four straps of bacon and five tablespoons of egg onto my plate. My stomach cramps in anticipation, desperate for me to scoop up a forkful and stuff it into my mouth.

“Hungry?” Jai asks, a sweet smile hinting at the corners of his lips.

I give him a smile of my own while I stab at the bacon and the scrambled egg with my fork, piling it on layer by layer. “Famished.”

I just love breakfast foods. I could eat them at every meal for the rest of my life. Joel gives Jai a look—a cocked eyebrow and a quirk in his lip—which Jai responds to with a single laugh.

“Breakfast foods are her favorite. Ice cream too.”

I stuff a forkful in my mouth and savor the taste. “Mm. You’re almost as good as Jai when it comes to cooking breakfast.”

Joel smiles, astonished. His white teeth are straight and beaming, surprisingly. He places the pan on the bench and tosses the towel over his shoulder. “I still can’t believe Jai cooks.”

I nod, a mouth full of food, and Jai pushes his bowl away.

“I had to learn.” He states, his tone gruff and forceful. “Someone had to cook for Jessica.”

The look on Joel’s face when Jai mentions their little sister tears my heart in two. Emotion after emotion plays over his features. I see fear first, followed by regret, anger, guilt, and finally, acceptance. I look down at my plate and swallow my food. So much for avoiding an argument.

“...she’s okay?” Joel asks.

The weak tone of his voice sends an arrow of emotion through my chest. Joel cares about his family. Surely Jai can see that.

“She’s fine. You should know she is in Italy…just in case you were going to take the time out of your busy schedule to wonder about her.”

“Jai...” I mumble, slipping my hand around his forearm as it lies against the benchtop.

The thick ropes of muscle that rest underneath his skin tighten and tense with the frustration he feels. Joel nods, running a tattooed hand over his face and pushing it through his black hair.

“Okay. I deserve that.”

“You deserve more than that.”

“Jai...” I try again, desperate for him to end it before it gets out of hand.

Both brothers are strong and both brothers aren’t afraid to fight. God knows if things were to ignite between them there’d be no lake house left. They’d destroy the place.

“I get it!” Joel booms, sending my heart into my throat. “I’m a shit brother. I abandoned my siblings when they needed me most and dumped all of my problems and responsibilities on to you. How many more times do you want me to apologize?”

Jai leaps to his feet, sending his wooden stool crashing to the ground. “That’s the thing, asshole. You haven’t apologized.”

Joel’s retort catches in his throat and realization flickers over his handsome features. Shocked, his lips part, expelling the shortest puff of air.

“Are you that messed up you don’t even know what the fuck you’re saying anymore?”

“I’m sure I’ve said it...” He looks to me for backup and I shrug.

“Well…technically you’ve said it once, but it was hardly apologetic.” I say, avoiding his eyes.

“I’m sorry. Shit. What else do you want me to say?” His laryngeal prominence bobs as he swallows his emotion. “I went in and I got distracted—so did you, Jai, so don’t give me that fucking look.”

Raising my hands, I slip off the stool and leave for the living room. “Don’t drag me into this.”

Every argument they pitch me against Monique and, quite frankly, it’s annoying. I drop onto the couch, a little depressed I abandoned my hot food on the bench.

“I got distracted?” Jai demands, slapping his palm against the wooden surface. “Bullshit. You’re here! I did what I fucking set out to do.”

“I have to do something!” Joel argues, his fierce glare fixated on Jai. “I can’t abandon her.”

“Why? You had no problem abandoning me and Jess.”

Disappointment smooths out Joel’s features. It’s in the furrow of his brow and the spasm of the muscles around his jaw. “I’d do it for you, little brother. I’d help you.”

“Don’t you put that shit on me. That’s not fair.”

Just as Joel turns away from Jai, there’s a knock at the door. Instinctively, my entire body tenses, my muscles burning with cramps. Jai and I exchange looks, the kind of look that says “Are you expecting anybody?”

I shake my head.

With an air of casualty, Joel pats up the hall toward the door. In the distance, I hear the deep murmur of voices and a distinct laugh. There’s only one person I knew that has a laugh so obnoxious and loud. The front door slams shut and the sound of heavy boots thump against the wooden floor boards. I lean forward as they file into the kitchen one by one. Ted’s in front carrying a football and wearing a light purple tee with black cargo shorts. Trailing miserably behind is Huss, draped in a pink polo and dark, denim jeans that bunch around his white shoes. Oh, fuck. I push myself to my feet.

“Kitten!” Ted cheers, stretching out his arm, pointing the end of his football at me.

I really hope he doesn’t expect me to catch that. Also, I’d really like the whole Kitten thing to stop now.

“It’s Emily.”

Huss waves. “Morning, Emma.”

I roll my eyes. It’s fucking pointless. They’re going to call me whatever the hell they like and there’s nothing I can do about it.

Unlike Ted, Huss doesn’t appear to be in the most cheerful mood. If he is, I sure as hell can’t tell underneath all the swelling. He’s covered in cuts, stitches, bruises and even has a shiny black cast for his broken arm. Poor guy. He’s been in better shape, that’s for sure.

“It’s Emil—” Forget it. It’s not like they give a shit anyway.

“Huss. Catch.” Ted lobs the football to Huss and it hits his broken arm before bouncing awkwardly into the kitchen.

“Ouch!” Huss growls, groaning so hard under his breath a vessel threatens to pop. “If you do that one more time asshole I’ll—”

His threat is cut off by a howl of laughter from Ted. “It’s just so funny. You should see your face.”

Stepping around them, Joel grabs the pan off the bench and slips it into the sink.

“Why are you in such a good mood?” I ask Ted, strolling back over to my plate.

He gives me a strange look as he reaches out and plucks a few straps of bacon from the pile. “Joel didn’t tell you?”

“Joel didn’t tell us what?” Jai asks before I get the chance.

Ted stuffs the belts of bacon into his mouth, purposely making it impossible for him to answer, and points at Joel who narrows his dark eyes at Ted. With a heavy exhale, Joel turns on the tap and leaves the gushing water to fill the sink.

“I’m paying them each fifty grand to help me get Monique out of Skull’s compound.” Joel tells us, leaning his hip against the edge of the bench. He nervously runs his hands over the back of his head as silence rears its ugly head and Ted reaches out with his slender fingers for more bacon.

I clear my throat. “How—how’d you even contact them? There are no phones. No internet.”

Pushing off the bench, Joel reaches into the back pocket of his gray sweatpants. “Huss left his cell here. I found it in the couch.”

He holds out the slim smartphone for Huss who takes it and slips it into one of his front pockets.

“So let me get this straight...you’re going to risk their lives for your own gain?” The disgust and confusion in Jai’s tone is loud, too loud to ignore.

Joel shrugs. “Why not? You did.”

I cringe and hold my breath, waiting for Jai to explode.

It doesn’t come.

Surprisingly.

“I have the blueprints to Skull’s compound in the car. I have to get them back by seven p.m. tonight to avoid any suspicion from the Captain.”

Joel nods, the tiniest hint of victory curling his lips. He shuts off the tap and suddenly his aura feels different. What was despair and anger is now determination and hope. I’m both happy for him and sad at the same time. Imagine how Monique will be if he manages to get to her...Skull is a sick man. Joel will be lucky to find her with her sanity still intact.

“I’m gonna get some air.”

Jai turns on his heel and storms toward the back porch. With his powerful hands, he shoves the flimsy screen door so hard it flies open and slams against the wall, making me jump.

“You should go talk to him.”

I whip my head around to face Ted and follow a thin drip of oil as it rolls down his chin.

“Me? Why me?”

“Because you’re the love interest.” He swipes at the oil with his forearm, smearing it into his skin. “And you’re not in danger of being punched in the face.”

Huss nods and Joel continues to wash his stupid pan, pretending the annoying situation he created doesn’t exist. He should be the one fixing it, not me. Pulling Jai out of one of his moods isn’t an easy feat and I’m tired of being the one who has to do it.

“You’re a police officer and you’re afraid of getting punched in the face?” I ask Ted who shrugs his strong, broad shoulders.

“Say what you want. A fist to the face hurts and I don’t like blood in my breakfast.”

Huss drags his sorry ass up to the counter as Ted slips a white, porcelain plate in front of him.

I sigh. Who wants to eat breakfast while it’s fresh anyway? Fuck me, right?

“Fine. I’ll go talk to him since none of you have the balls.”

They murmur their thanks and I roll my eyes.

Pussies.

***

Dry bark crunches under the force of Jai’s fist as he slams it into the trunk of a large oak tree, four yards out from the lake. He curses under his breath, lifting his fist to his face to examine the damage.

“Aw.” I pout, stopping a few feet out, crossing my arms over my chest.

It’s a desperate attempt to hold as much of my rapidly evaporating body heat against me as I can.

“What’d that innocent tree do to you?”

Jai snaps his head in my direction, his grazed and bleeding hand clenching and relaxing at his side. Blowing out a heavy exhale, he turns and rests his back against the thick trunk of the browning tree, his feet buried in the fallen leaves on the damp ground. The cold breeze whips at my bare arms and I shiver. It’s sharp, like it’s carrying miniscule shards of ice. An obvious sign of impending doom. Or winter, as I like to call it.

Jai flicks his head at me. “Come here.”

His tone is light, but his eyes are the darkest kind of blue, still filled with the frustration put there by his brother. I walk towards him, the tips of my toes freezing against the damp ground. Even the bright morning sun isn’t enough to warm the green blades of grass chilled by nightfall.

The sea of dying leaves crunch and break underneath my feet as I close the distance between us. When I’m within arm’s reach he catches me by the shoulders and I stumble as he pulls me into him. He wraps his strong, heavy arms around my neck, pressing his hard chest against my cheek. I hug him back, slipping my arms around his slim waist and burying my fingers in his black sweater to prevent frostbite. I love snuggling into his sweaters. His smell catches in the fibers of the material, adding to its warmth and comfort for when I bury my nose in it.

“Does he bug you as much as he bugs me or am I being dramatic?” He asks, planting a soft kiss on my head.

I fight a smile. It’s not foreign for Jai to be a little dramatic. That being said, his brother doesn’t exactly have his head screwed on straight at the moment either. Occasionally, even I want to slap the shit out of him.

“A little bit of both.”

He laughs once, sounding more like a ‘humph’ in my ear as it presses against his chest. Another breeze whips around us, the dry leaves sounding like paper as they rub together. We listen to the chorus of trees, until the wind runs out of breath. The silence of nature is bliss and, unlike the stale silence of an awkward conversation, it feels alive.

Jai shifts, moving his feet shoulder width apart, pulling me even tighter against him. I feel his fingers toying with my hair against my back, wrapping thin locks of it around his finger, tugging slightly at my scalp.

“What do I do about Ted and Huss?” He asks, his voice vibrating through his chest and into my ear canal. “I can’t let them go.”

“They’re big boys who can make their own decisions. If they didn’t want to do it, they wouldn’t be here.”

“But it’s not right. Huss is barely holding it together and Ted will do it out of loyalty to me. Their lives are worth a hell of a lot more than fifty grand. If something happens to them…”

I squeeze him. “I know.”

Swoooosh! Whissssssshhh!

Wind lashes us, each one stronger and colder than the last, blowing away all the body heat we generated in its absence. I shiver a violent shiver that travels the length of my body.

“Cold?” Jai asks, releasing me from his arms.

I nod, pulling back to hug myself. I wonder if it’d be as obvious if I wasn’t vibrating like the New York subway or have goosebumps as high as Mount Everest.

Jai tugs on the hem of his black sweater and stretches it as far as he can, holding it forward enough for me to slip inside too.

I tilt my head, holding back a smile. “You want me to get in there with you?”

He smiles, his full lips curling into a soft and sincere smile that makes my heart flutter. “There’s always room for you.”

I squeeze myself tighter, caressing my own biceps with my thumb, and contemplate his offer, slightly stressing myself over his words.

Always. Do we have always? Does that word even apply to us? How long do we have? Say we survive this...will we still have each other when it’s over? Will he still want me? I’m not stupid. I know what I am to him—a stray cat that pulls on his heart strings. That’s all. I hate that I’m comparing myself to a cat for this given his annoying pet name for me, but I know exactly how this is going to go. He’ll take me home and heal me up. Then, when I’m settled and I’m too dependent on him, thinking I’ve finally found someone who actually gives a shit about me, it’s finished.

Why? Why do I think this?

Because we’re from two different worlds.

Because why would he settle for a stray when he can have a pedigree?

Because I’m an insecure asshole who doesn’t know how to appreciate things until they’re gone.

Because…just because.

His heavy hand on my shoulder pulls me from my self-doubting thoughts. It’s relieving, like throwing me a life raft after five minutes of treading water in a turbulent ocean. Peace and calm, that’s what he offers me.

“You think too much.” He tugs me forward, lifting his sweater and stuffing me underneath.

Caught in the fabric, his smell surges over me like whitewash carried on the top of a powerful wave. I slide my face up the clothed ridges of his abdominals and over his firm chest, the sound of stretching fabric around me, until I pop out through the neck of the sweater.

Space is limited and his chin touches my forehead as a result. The sweater holds us tightly, so tight I can’t move my arms.

Forcing it, I pull back and peer up at him, the fabric around the neck of the sweater complains, threatening to snap.

“I bet you’re regretting this.” I point as the edge of the fabric cuts into his neck.

“Are you still cold?”

I observe the amount of body heat that generates off him and how quickly it makes my goosebumps fade. I shake my head.

“Then no. I don’t regret it...even if it is cutting off my circulation.”

Our gaze is locked, the subtlest smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

My heart flips.

My palms sweat.

Slowly, he cranes his neck and kisses me on the mouth. My breath catches in my throat, the sound lost in the howl of the wind, as his tongue sweeps mine.

My eyes flutter shut.

The ground liquefies.

Time and space falls away.

It no longer matters where we are, or what we’re doing, and the sharp bullets of ice that are carried by the force of the wind are melted in the heat we conjure before they have the chance to whip along my burning skin.

Kissing under a golden oak tree in fall, our feet drowned in crunchy, crimson leaves with winter lingering on the precipice...is this the kind of shit girls fall for in those romance books? Is it this what I’m falling for?

Until him, I’ve never felt like I fit in. I’ve never felt good enough to be anyone’s friend and certainly not anyone’s lover.

But here I am—attached—sewn so tightly to another human being that if we were to be cut in half I would spill out and my seam would never be the same again. I’m attached to him in a way that makes me want to throw up—in a way I’ve never been attached to anyone before.

He releases me from my stupor as he pulls his mouth away from mine. I open my eyes and am met with his. He watches me, his jaw clenching with an uncertainty that makes my heart race in my chest. It pounds my lungs, leaving me breathless.

“Run away with me, Kitten.”

My breath rushes from my pummeled lungs only to catch in my throat.

“What?”

“I did what I came to do. Joel’s problems aren’t mine...run away with me.”

Blank. Blank white walls slam into me and I’ve got nothing. Actually nothing.

“Uh…run...run away? With you?”

His brows furrow as he diverts his stare away from me, his dark ocean-like eyes awkwardly scanning over the lake. “Well, that’s not offensive at all.”

“I don’t mean it like that...I just...you want to leave your brother? After everything?”

He drags his stare back and the emotionless state of them scares me. I hate the hostility that exudes from him whenever his brother enters the conversation. It changes him into a completely different person—like the intense Jai I met underground.

“Saving him hasn’t helped any...” He drops his head back against the tree, exposing his throat. “I thought that maybe once he’s back he’d want to take care of Jessica again and I’d finally be able to do something for myself.”

I push on to the tips of my toes and plant a soft kiss on the hollow of his throat.

A harsh blow of wind whips by, shaking the trees, and causing leaves to rain down on us. Jai drops his head, burying it into the hair that blows against the nape of my neck. Eventually, like always, the wind runs out of breath, but Jai doesn’t lift his head.

A minute passes and soon that minute stretches into two.

Then four.

New blasts of wind are conjured. Blow after blow they slam us, but he doesn’t budge.

Not until I finally speak.

“He needs your help. What are you afraid of?”

Jai inhales deeply through his nose and blows it out his mouth before finally lifting his head. His sincere blue eyes replace decaying bark and dried sap as he straightens his posture.

“Honestly?”

I nod. “Honestly.”

“I’m afraid this will end...and I’m not ready for this to end.”

I tip my head on a slight angle, unable to keep myself from being sarcastic.

“You like being locked up in a lake house—an old lake house I should mention—while a psychopathic murderer with his own damn army hunts us down?”

He rolls his eyes. “That part I can obviously do without, but here, in this little lake house with you? Yes.”

Butterflies emerge from cocoons and race around my tummy, their wings lightly flicking me, causing heat to flood my body, rising rapidly until it pools in my cheeks.

“Jai...”

“You know, I keep having this recurring dream...all of this is over. There’s no Skull, no drama...no responsibilities.”

I arch an eyebrow, shifting my weight onto my left leg. “Not even one?”

He shakes his head. “Not a single one.”

“Well, that’s a little unrealistic.”

He scoffs, making me squeak as he pinches my side between the large pads of his thumb and forefinger. Unprecedented giggles erupt from my chest as my muscles spasm underneath his ruthless pressure.

“Can I finish?”

I laugh, deciding to keep the “that’s what she said” joke to myself, and nod.

Jai glances up at the tree. “Where was I?”

“You were at the part where we’re Barbie and Ken with absolutely no problems.”

He drops his stare back to mine, his irises swirling with beautiful amusement. “Not true. Ken doesn’t have a penis and I’d say that’s a major problem.”

I snort. “I think we’re getting a little off topic here. Tell me about your dream.”

“All right.” He clears his throat, leaning back against the tree, pulling me with him. “It starts as I’m taking you to dinner. It’s a big, extravagant dinner with more food than you’d consume in an entire year.”

“Why so much foo—”

He crushes his mouth to mine for the briefest second. I don’t even have the time to close my eyes and enjoy the aggressive press of his lips against mine before he pulls away with a “Shhhhh.”

Somehow, as my brain spins haphazardly in my head, I manage a nod.

Listening. Right.

“We sit down and I order all of my favorites from the menu—things I know you’ve never tried—and I order all of the things I think you’d like.”

“So…anything that comes with bacon?”

“Right.” A genuine smile curves his supple lips. “You wear a beautiful knee length red, silk dress that cuts across one shoulder and ties around the waist. Your long, smooth legs are seemingly never ending until my stare reaches the tall, black heels that encase your soft feet.”

I smile, unable to help it. He recites the details of the dream like he’s committed it to memory. There are so many butterflies in my belly at the moment I’m surprised I haven’t flown away yet.

“You don’t eat much, but we have a good time getting to know each other in more relaxed circumstances.”

He stops and admires me, his face content with the story he told. I blink. Well? Where the hell is the rest of it? I wait with faux patience. Not knowing is almost unbearable, like watching a movie with no conflict or climax. I like climaxes in every aspect of my life, thanks.

“And then?” I urge, prodding his stomach with my finger.

His eyes flare, teasing me with untold information. “And then what?”

Oh, the fucking angst. I hate it!

“What happens after that?”

Jai leans closer, until his warm breath blows across my cheeks. “After that…you fall madly in love with me.”

I roll my eyes, nervous at how warm it makes me feel under the collar. “Is that right?”

He’s smug, his handsome face smooth and happy. “It is.”

Fine. I’ll play his game. “And what happens after I fall madly in love with you?”

“You don’t want to know.”

I press against him. “Oh, but I do.”

My body exudes heat, singeing the fine hairs on the surface of my skin. Jai lowers his face and brushes his lips against mine. I can’t breathe. His very existence sucks the air from my lungs like a vacuum does when you put it over your mouth.

“You want to know?” He teases, his voice laced with desire.

I nod. I nod earnestly.

“I take you home and throw you on my bed. You’re absolutely terrified as I grab your pathetic, thin, little dress and tear it right from your body.”

His eyes brighten as my lips part and I shiver.

“To my delight, you’re not wearing anything underneath.”

Embarrassingly, my breath hitches and if I had pearls I’d clench them. “And then?”

“And then…” He pauses as his heavy lidded eyes flicker over my face. “I keep the rest of the dream to myself.”

“What?” I gape like a fish out of water. “Y-you can’t do that.”

His lips pull into a devious smirk. “I just did.”

I open my mouth to cuss him out and maybe say some shit I’ll regret later, but the sound of the back door slamming shut takes the words right out of my mouth. I don’t need to look over my shoulder to know it’s Joel. I see it Jai’s eyes. I see the glimmer of happiness I put there before it drowns in bitter darkness. Jai pulls his head back, the connection between us evaporating in a second.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” He groans, dropping the back of his head against the tree.

I push back against the sweater, hinting for him to let me out.

“Stay.” He mutters.

I shake my head. “You two need to sort this out.”

Sighing, he grabs the hem of the sweater and stretches it out, making it easy for me to slip out the bottom. I grab his hand and squeeze it gently before I turn around and walk off. A violent shiver makes me hyperaware of the rapid return of my goosebumps.

I wrap my arms around my waist and hug myself as tight as I can as I approach Joel. He tugs on the strings to a black hoodie Jai gave him, tightening the fabric around his face.

“He’s all right?” He asks, his eyebrows furrowing with the first hint of concern I’ve seen him show for Jai since he got here.

I swallow, stopping in my tracks. The safe answer is to tell him Jai is all right. The correct answer is to deny that Jai is okay...because he’s not. He needs his brother. He destroyed his own life to bring Joel back and for what? I’m an orphan so I can’t speak from experience, but I know common courtesy requires some kind of acknowledgment at the very least.

“Uh...” I scratch my head, shifting my weight onto my left leg as I lean with my hip. How do I put this delicately but still drive home my main point?

“He threw away his career and risked his life for you.”

Yeesh. Not exactly delicate, but at least it’s precise.

“But I didn’t—”

“He’s murdered people in cold blood and, not to mention, he recently abandoned his little sister and has her shipped to a different country, and for what? You?”

Joel drops his dark, ocean stare to the icy ground. I’m glad I’m making him uncomfortable. He should know the lengths his brother went to to save his life.

“I fought him constantly, you know. I tried to convince him that you were dead and Skull did too, but he was hell bent on proving us wrong. He couldn’t let it go...” I pause, letting it sink in. “Don’t make him wish he’d listened to us.”

Joel looks at me. Emotion, clear and wet, builds up in the corner of his eyes and it pulls at my heart strings, sending it catapulting into my throat.

He is a man in love.

He is a man barely holding it together.

“I can’t forget her. I can’t leave her. Not there—not with him.” He clenches his jaw—on and off—in thought. “I need his help.”

I offer a small, comforting smile. Love is such an unrelenting force of nature. Jai could cut off Joel’s legs and send him to the other side of the world and Joel would still make it back here. That’s the way the heart works. Who would have thought such a delicate ball of blood and tissue could be so strong?

“Good luck.” I say, unable to hide another shiver as the wind picks up.

“Thanks.”

I force my cold, stiff legs forward, eager to get back inside the warm house. As I reach the back steps, I glance over my shoulder and whisper another good luck under my breath.

God knows he’s going to need it.

Need

Jai

We can’t even look at each other. Awkwardly, our stares scan over the lake and the rustle of leaves is the only sound to be heard. This uncertainty is a far cry from where we used to be. Joel and I could talk about anyone and anything…but I guess a lot of things have changed.

Exhaling, Joel reaches into the pocket of his black hoodie and pulls out a cigarette. I watch him as he places it between his dry lips and fishes for a lighter in the pockets of his sweatpants. He finds it in the front pocket and brings the metal plate at the top to the tip of his cigarette. With a swift flick of his thumb, sparks turn into a solid flame. It dances in the breeze before he shields it with his hand and lights his cigarette. The tip glows red as he sucks on the butt and returns the lighter to his pocket.

The smoking.

I can’t stand the smoking. The smell of it clings to everything he touches and it turns my stomach. Inhaling, he frees the cigarette from his lips and extends it to me. I clench my jaw and stare at him. Can he see how badly I want to stamp it out on his nut sack?

“I don’t smoke.”

He nods a smug kind of nod as he blows out the poison in a puff of smoke. “You should. It’d relax you a little.”

“I’m relaxed.” I shoot back and he rolls his eyes.

“Sounds like it.”

Ah. There it is—the sarcasm I grew up with. At least some things haven’t changed.

“Look, I’m sorry I reached out to your friends for help, but I didn’t know what else to do.”

I fold my arms across my chest and glance back to the lake. “Emily is right. Ted and Huss are big enough and ugly enough to make their own decisions. If they think their life is worth risking for a female you share with Skull then that’s their problem.”

Dead silence falls—even the trees stop swaying as the breeze vanishes.

“Watch your mouth, baby brother. I’ve killed for a lot less.”

I frown, turning my attention back to him. There’s a crazy gleam in the bottomless depths of his eyes—a gleam from his new life. The manic unpredictability...it mimics Skull’s. It also nags at me, begging me to fuel it, daring me to continue to push Joel’s big, shiny buttons.

“Of all the women you could have chosen when you were at the top of the world it just had to be his.”

With clear aggression, he sucks back another hit of nicotine and blows it back out just as quick. “She wasn’t his.”

“She sure as shit wasn’t yours. How many whores does Skull have anyway and what was Monique’s price?”

“Enough!” He barks out, but I’m nowhere near fucking finished.

“Let me guess. She’s a junkie? She fucks him for nice shoes and free crack?”

His jaw ticks. “Jai.”

I click my fingers. “Oh, I see. She’s only fucking him to pay her way through med school?”

Tossing the cigarette, he launches forward. His large, heavy hands slam into my shoulders, shoving me hard against the tree. I don’t react as he twists my sweater between his tattooed knuckles and pulls me forward again. His face is an inch from mine, his putrid cigarette breath blowing heavily across my skin.

“One more fucking word and I’ll cut your tongue out of your mouth. Who the fuck do you think you are?”

“You want to get yourself killed? Fine, but don’t expect me to help.”

“You’re going to abandon me when I need you? Where’s the fucking brotherhood in that? Huh?”

I smile. I smile because he’s so damn clueless. I’ve never abandoned him. I came through for him when everyone else was telling me it was a lost cause. I never gave up on Joel...until now.

“Don’t talk to me about brotherhood. That went out the door the second you left me to look after Jessica.” I shrug him off and shove him back. “Fuck you and your whor—”

His fist slams into my mouth with the weight of a freight train behind it. My head is tossed to the side and I taste blood. Hunched, I press my fingers to my lips and pulling them back reveals blood. My brain swells in my skull, pressing painfully against the bone, giving me an instant headache. I should have seen it coming.

I didn’t.

I glare up at him. Joel’s nostrils flare and his pupils dilate. At his sides, his fist clench and relax, syncing with the quick tempo of his chest.

I spit blood on the leaves at my feet. “You didn’t let me finish.”

“Call her that again,” he growls. “And I will end you.”

I smirk, despite how much it hurts my lip. “I’ve fought monsters three times the size of you. You’re going to have to try harder if you want to intimidate me.”

“Try harder?” He laughs once as he bends down and picks out his burning cigarette from a pile of leaves. Smoke wafts up as leaves burn, but he stomps it out with his bare foot. “I’m not trying at all.”

I swipe at my mouth and swallow the metallic tasting blood that pools on my tongue.

Relaxed, and annoyingly smug, Joel puffs repeatedly on the end of his cigarette, encouraging the ember to burn evenly.

“If I wanted to intimidate you, I’d start with the cute, little brunette you’ve found yourself...maybe make a comment on the freaky similarities between her and Skull’s dead wife.”

I grind my teeth. How does he know about that? “What’s your point?”

“My point is you’re a hypocrite. I’ve seen the skull tattoo on her collarbone. If she was yours, she sure as shit ain’t anymore. In fact, I’m certain Skull would trade my ordinary whore for one that looks like his dead wife.”

My heart thunders in my chest. I should kick the shit out of him just for saying it.

“You don’t have the balls to contact Skull to arrange a trade. He’ll kill you the second he sees your face. If he doesn’t, I will.”

He tips his head to the side. “You’ll kill me? For her?”

Was it not clear enough? I narrow my glare. “If I have to.”

Joel inhales his cigarette, sucking its poison deep into his lungs and holds it, ensuring it soaks into his lung tissue. A second later, he blows it out.

“Good. Then you know how it feels.”

“I’m not helping you, Joel.”

Joel clenches his jaw and growls through his teeth, crushing his lit cigarette in his fist.

“Why the fuck not?!”

“If I die Jessica is on her own—Emily too. Their lives aren’t worth risking—not for one of Skull’s whor—”

Again, his fist slams into my mouth, filling it with blood. It fucking hurts! If he wasn’t already so beat up, I’d beat him to a pulp.

“Fuck! Will you let me finish?!”

He clenches his wrist in his hand then gives it a quick shake. “Goddamn it, Jai! I can’t do it without you.”

I run my tongue along the split in my lower lip and wince. How’d he hit the same spot twice? I press the back of my hand against my mouth. I’m not fucking doing this.

“I love her!” He begs, his eyes glistening with tears.

It knocks the wind out of my lungs, filling me with empathy—empathy I don’t want to feel.

“I love her more than anything and he has her! He’s doing God knows what to her...”

Joel misplaces his footing and I step forward as he keels over, clenching his stomach. My lips throbs as more blood rolls over my tongue. I don’t want to help him and the feeling sinks into my stomach like a rock.

My big brother.

I turn away from him and head back towards the house.

“Jai, please. I need you!” He shouts, his sadness and anger punching holes through the wind. “I need my brother!”

I flick my shoulders, dipping my head to push through the wind.

I don’t have a brother.

Not anymore.

Beastly

Emily

Ever so gently, I press the edge of the stitch that runs along Huss’s cheekbone and he winces before shooing me back with a slap on the hand.

“Stop!” He hisses, his perfectly shaped eyebrows pulling together as he bares his teeth at me.

I snap my hands to my chest and roll my eyes. You can’t look at this guy without him crying “ouch”. You know, that’s probably what I hate most about working in the hospital—the hypochondriacs. You’d be surprised how many people exaggerate an ache or injury. I get some people have lower pain thresholds, but come on. A common stress headache doesn’t even come close to the thrum of one associated with a brain tumor.

“Jesu—will you let the girl check your stitches?” Ted protests with a mouth full of pancake. “You’re acting like a motherfucking child.”

Huss sneers, folding one of his thick arms over his chest. “Well, it fucking hurts.”

“You know what hurts me?”

“I was in a car accident. I don’t give a shit what’s hurting y—”

Ted swallows his food and points the tip of his fork at Huss. “That damn shirt you’re wearing. What color is that anyway? Pansy pink?”

Chuckling, I head over to the sink. Looking back over my shoulder, Huss pinches the bright fabric between his thumb and forefinger.

“It’s salmon! How many times do I have to say it?”

“And how many times do I have to tell you that’s not fucking Salmon.” Ted argues. “It’s pinker than the nipples on an albino.”

I snort as I turn away and reach for the soap. I pump once and foam up my hands. There’s never a dull moment when you’re stuck with Ted and Huss. The conversations these men have are ridiculous, inappropriate, and downright disgusting.

“Do albinos even have pink nipples?” Huss asks and I glance over my shoulder.

He scratches his head, the tips of his fingers running over the flaming skull tattoo that I hate so much. They both ponder the question before peering at me for an answer. I pull my head back in offense, contorting my face. Are they kidding? First of all, it’s inappropriate to ask such a question and second of all, whether or not albinos have pink nipples isn’t something I’ve ever felt the need to ask—or Google.

“How am I supposed to know? Do I look albino to you?”

“You are a little pale.” Huss points, receiving an agreeing nod from Ted.

I scoff. “Get the fuck out of here.”

Turning, I hit the tap and water shoots out. I stick my hands underneath the thin jet and let the water blast the soap off my skin. They howl with laughter while I ignore them.

“Tell us, Kitten. Are your nipples pink?” Huss asks, his voice thick with humor and genuine interest.

Shutting off the tap, I turn around and face him as he sits on the wooden bar stool opposite Ted, his knees pressed against the dishwasher.

“You should ask Jai.” I tell him, a wicked smile spreading my lips. “He knows.”

Ted lifts his arms, surrendering from the conversation. “Oh no. I’m bowing out of this one. Jai will kick your already disabled ass and I want nothing to do with it.”

Huss looks at Ted. “You scared?”

“Scared? Nah. I’m smart. Besides, fucking with a girl like her? No thanks.”

Because that’s not offensive. For a girl who has major daddy issues—which I mentally admit—I like to impress every male I meet to some degree. I mean, what girl doesn’t like to feel desired and pretty? Show me one and I’ll show you a liar.

“A girl like me?” I ask, leaning back on the bench. “What’s wrong with girls like me?”

“You’ve all got that crazy look in your eyes. It’s unsettling.”

“That crazy look?”

“Uh-huh. The ‘I will saw your dick off with a blunt pair scissors if you do me wrong’ look—and don’t you dare feign innocence. I distinctly remember you attacking me like a bat out of hell the first time I showed up.”

“Jai didn’t tell me you were coming. I panicked.”

“You almost choked me to death. You know what? It doesn’t matter. My mom would whoop my ass if I ever brought a white girl to family dinner anyway, especially after the last one.”

Huss snorts, his gray eyes flaring with interest. “She doesn’t like white girls?”

“She likes white girls...provided I’m not pumping babies into them.”

Ted scoops up scrambled egg with his spoon and stuffs it into his mouth. When he realizes Huss and I are staring at him he shrugs, swallows, and explains: “She’s very proud of her heritage and doesn’t want to water down the family tree.”

Huss laughs once and grips his glass of clean, cold water. “That’s messed up.”

“That’s my momma.”

Ted chuckles as Huss gulps down his drink. Emptying his glass, Huss places it on the kitchen bench and swipes his forearm over his mouth before grinning in my direction. Smug bastard.

“So?” He hints, tipping his head back ever so slightly.

“So...what?”

“Your nips. What color are they?”

He gives me a naughty smirk, the kind of smirk Jai would kill him for. To be honest, I’ve never been a one man kind of girl...until recently. The thought of committing to one person—to one soul—is unsettling. Curiously, I decide to take the opportunity to test myself and to test the intense feelings I have for Jai by attempting to return the suggestive smirk. Can I do it? I feel my face pinch together, my muscles forcing themselves into a scowl. I guess I’m a changed woman. Is that how deeply Jai affects me? Do I care for him so much that I don’t want to be with anyone else? Biologically speaking, Huss should make me all kinds of hot and bothered. He’s tall, hot, confident, and has just the right amount of inappropriateness about him, but the need just isn’t there. I wouldn’t have thought twice about banging him back in my ‘pre-Jai’ days...but now it’s different. Now I don’t want to share my body with anyone else.

Thunderous steps boom across the patio, growing louder and louder. Then, and only then, does a smirk tug at the corners of my lips.

Because I know the heavy feet causing such a frightful ruckus belong to my beast.

“Ask him.” I tell Huss, smiling victoriously.

The door flies open, its thin wood slamming against the wall of the house, and there he is.

Every angry inch of him.

Jai’s shoulders are squared, his eyebrows furrowed, and his handsome face is marred by a bleeding split in his lip. I’m guessing the talk with Joel didn’t go well.

Jai storms through the kitchen, as violent and as lethal as a tornado, before barging up the stairs, his feet dropping like stones against the floorboards.

Huss turns back to his plate and lifts his fork. “I’ll pass.”

Sipping his juice, Ted snickers. Behind the murderous Jai, Joel jogs in. His face is wild and angry, but his eyes give him away—panic and disappointment, emphasized by the gleam of regret. Joel heads for the stairs, but he’s not climbing them. Not on my watch. I push off the bench and swiftly cross the room. Slipping in front of Joel, I block his path to upstairs. I won’t let him upset Jai further. Not today.

He calms his breathing, forcing it through his nose. “I just want to apologize. That’s all.”

I shrug. “Give him a minute.”

If I let Joel upstairs with Jai now—in the state he’s in—I know Jai will end up doing something he’s going to regret later. I saw the darkness in Jai’s eyes when he entered the house and it wasn’t anger from the pressure his brother has put on him.

It was rage.

Murderous rage.

Team that with the fact Joel had apparently hit him in the mouth and you have the perfect cocktail for one lethal man.

Goosebumps prickle up my arms, over my shoulders and up behind my ears before dancing along my scalp. To be honest, I’m a little scared. I’m scared by the lack of emotion I felt from Jai when he entered the house. It makes me shudder…the last time I sensed that similar lack of humanity inside of him was when he fought in the tunnels underground.

He was vicious.

Cold.

He was another man—possessed by a demon who had an insatiable thirst for blood.

Jai enjoyed it. He’d never admit it, but he enjoyed beating his opponents to a pulp, and I know his brother isn’t exempt to such punishment. The way I see it, I’m doing Joel a favor by not letting him upstairs, especially if he likes his pretty face the way it is.

He tries to maneuver his large, lean body past me. “I told you I only want to apologize.”

I block his path, slamming my hand into the wall in front of his chest and look him dead in the eyes. “And I told you to give him a minute. Test me and I’ll make it so you never see your precious Monique again. Understand?”

Do I look like I’m playing? Do I look like I’m stopping him from going upstairs for fun?

No.

And I swear to God I will cut a bitch if he tries to push past me.

Our eyes remain locked. His eyes swimming with scenarios, analyzing different ways to get past me without shoving me to the side. A small eternity passes before he allows his body to slump, relaxing the ropes of muscle in his torso.

“Fine. Have it your way.”

He slinks away, strolling slowly down the hall to his room, guilt and sadness heavy in his steps.

Thank God for that. I exhale and relax my own muscles as I place both hands on my hips. At this point, I’m kind of glad I’m on my own. Outside of myself, there’s no external pressures on me. I do what I want when I want and it doesn’t affect anyone else.

Turning, I bound up the stairs, unable to shake the need to comfort Jai. One by one my conscious mind slips memories to the front of my mind—vivid memories of all the times I denied anyone comfort, choosing to treat them like a leper instead of a friend.

You’ve never wanted to comfort anyone before—not even Holli Peterson when her husband died—and she was the only one who spoke to you when you were trying to become a nurse. Maybe you’re falling in lo —

I gulp, gripping the thin, wooden banister in my hand.

Maybe I should WebMD the symptoms I’m having. I trust the experts on that site will squash my fears of the dreaded ‘L’ bug, diagnosing the way my heart pounds and my head spins as some kind of life threatening bowel issue.

That I can handle.

It’s not that I don’t want to fall in love, the thought of it is nice, it’s just…the attachment.

I can’t handle the attachment.

I know, deep down, I’m someone who can get a little too attached and, because I’ve kept it at bay for so long, what if it’s too much?

What if he crushes my fragile heart under the heavy heel of his boot?

Then what?

Sweet Seventeen

Jai

In the darkness, my eyes flutter open and I turn my head toward the window, but there’s no light. How long have I been up here? Seventeen hours, at least. What time is it? I blink, straightening my head to look up at the ceiling. Fuck, my mouth hurts. I run my tongue over the split, tasting the lingering hints of cream Emily rubbed into my lip. Her head is heavy on my chest, her arms draped over my ribs. Her skin is warmer than mine, her heart beating at a relaxed pace against my side. In the silence, I hear her stomach rumble. Her food intake today was practically non-existent because she preferred to sit here and watch me sulk all day. In those moments of concern and comfort, when she lets her guard down, I feel like she cares about me the way I care about her. I feel like a future with her is possible. Who would have thought that I went to the darkest depths of hell and found an angel? I’ve never been a firm believer in fate, but the circumstances on which we met are too strange to rule as a coincidence.

She is my person...and I fucking love her. I love her so much it makes me sick and, as luck would have it, the only girl I’ve ever loved will never accept it because she doesn’t think she’s worthy of love.

Just. My. Damn. Luck.

Love doesn’t discriminate. Love is pure, an accumulation of all the good feelings and none of the bad. Good luck trying to convince her of that though. It’s like flogging a dead horse. Is that the saying?

Karma is an asshole. I bet she’s enjoying this. All those girls I parted ways with because I didn’t feel the same...and now I’m the idiot who has fallen head over heels for someone who can’t bring herself to return it.

Reaching out, I press the button on the top of the alarm clock and a bright blue light lights up the room, burning my eyes. Squinting, I try to work out the numbers. Three. Five. Seven. I blow out an exhale. Four o’clock in the morning and I’m awake...now what?

I glance at Emily’s sleeping face, resting peacefully on my chest. I love the light spattering of caramel freckles that flow from one of her cheeks to the other. I love the darkness of her hair and the curve in her top lip. I love her height, her milky complexion, and the rise of her breasts.

The light from the clock shuts off, darkening the room.

Fuck Skull for threatening to take her from me. I’ll kill him for it.

I shut my eyes in an attempt to put myself back to sleep, but thought after thought flicks by—my thought train too erratic to ignore now—and that’s when I hear the handle on the bedroom door creak. I inhale through my nose, calming the sudden spike in my pulse and lessening the adrenaline that leaks into my blood. Slowly, I reach between the bed and the bedside table. The tips of my fingers slide against the handle of my handgun and slip into place, my index finger firm against the trigger. Gently, I lift it, ready to shoot at a moment’s notice.

“Jai?”

Joel? I lower the gun, feeling stupid for reaching for it in the first place. If Skull knew where we were, he’d make a show of it. He wouldn’t sneak into my bedroom at four in the morning.

“You awake?” He whispers through the darkness.

My pulse returns to normal as my lungs regulate the oxygen a little better and I run my warm palm over my face.

“Yeah.”

“Can we talk?”

I ponder it. Now that yesterday’s drama has worn off I feel stupid for pumping myself up. I shouldn’t have stormed out like a child. I shouldn’t have punched the tree or antagonized Joel. I’ll be the first to admit that.

Last night, Emily told me I should accept the fact Joel has changed and that I should honor his relationship with Monique. I guess if he’s willing to die for her that makes her family too. I’ll give him one more chance to justify breaking in to Skull’s home to save her.

One.

I exhale. “I’ll be down in five.”

He closes the door and Emily stirs.

“If that was your brother I’m going to kick his ass.” She mutters, her voice husky with sleep.

She lifts her head off my chest and drops it onto her pillow. I smile, rolling onto my side and draping my arm over her waist.

“You’d fight my brother for me?”

Her warm, soft hand snakes up my stomach, making my muscles clench under her gentle touch.

“For you? Yeah.”

I lean in close, until my nose touches hers. “I think I can handle it.”

“Don’t go.” She whispers, sliding my hand from her waist to her naked breast. “We have better things to do.”

Angling her head, she raises it and I kiss her mouth, stroking the side of her face with my finger. “Sleep. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Without protest, she frees my hand and rolls over, tucking her arms under her pillow.

I exhale again, disappointed I have to get out of my warm bed and sit in the cold air to have the same discussions I’ve already had with Joel. Will it end the same?

Eventually, I manage to drag myself out of bed. I swipe at my blurry eyes as I bend down and scoop up my thick, gray sweatpants. As quietly as I can, I slip into them and chuck on a hoodie before exiting the room and descending the wooden stairs with heavy feet.

In the kitchen, Joel is sitting on the bench, his socked feet resting on one of the stools. From the kitchen, I can see into the sitting room where Huss and Ted are passed out, one on each couch, their snores vibrating the wood underneath my feet.

“It’s no wonder you can’t sleep.” I say, sauntering up to the kitchen bench.

Letting a soft smile curve his lips, Joel nods and pushes an empty glass in my direction.

I cock an eyebrow and notice the drunken heaviness in his eyelids. He’s been at this a while. Unscrewing the thin, metal cap Joel pours the booze into my cup, half filling it with straight whiskey.

“It’s four in the morning.” I point out, accepting the glass anyway.

“But the sun isn’t up and that’s good enough for me.”

Joel watches as I lift the glass to my lips and take a small sip. The tiny amount of booze is enough to set my mouth and my tongue alight, but it’s a welcome distraction. It makes me feel less…awkward.

He hangs his head, pressing the top of it against his cup. I watch, curiously, as he taps his index finger against the glass. He takes four whole sips before he makes eye contact with me.

“Remember when you were little and I’d pour you a glass of milk before bed and then tell you a story to help you sleep?”

I nod. “I remember.”

Up until I was eleven he’d do it. Though, most of the time, he’d purposely make the stories scary and I’d end up sleeping in my parent’s bed after screaming my way through a nightmare.

“Well, think of this like that…only you’re gonna need the hard liquor instead of milk to help you sleep when I’m done.”

I laugh once. “That scary, huh?”

“Scary?” He shrugs, indifferent. “A little. Fucked up?”

He shivers, sucks back a large mouthful of whiskey, and starts at the beginning. I listen, intently, hanging on every grotesque and exciting word. When he reaches the end…fucked up doesn’t even begin to describe it.

“So...” I say, frowning into the untouched liquid in my glass. “You kidnapped Monique for Skull?”

He nods, then shakes his head. “Well, I mean, it was a fake kidnapping staged by her father, but, essentially, yes.”

My stomach churns and I tighten my hands around my glass. I never thought I’d hear my brother confess to murder and kidnapping. He was always the good one. I got into trouble occasionally, but Joel never did—not even once. From what I gather, Monique’s father lost to Skull in a game of poker and, to save his expensive way of life, he gave up his only daughter. Instead of beating his sorry ass Joel took the girl.

“How could you do that?” I wonder aloud.

“I didn’t have a choice. I was in deep—too deep to fuck it all up on an unknown seventeen year old girl.”

I flinch at her age. You don’t need to be a lawyer or a police officer to know sexual relations with a minor is illegal. Not to mention the age gap. Joel is nine years her senior.

“Seventeen?!” I whisper, harshly. “Are you insane?”

“She was seventeen when I kidnapped her, but I didn’t touch her until after her eighteenth birthday.”

I roll my eyes. “Well, aren’t you a fucking standup guy?”

“It wasn’t supposed to happen and I sure as shit didn’t plan on it, but Skull was adamant that I keep my eyes on her. After she agreed to stay with him I was the one who had to train her, dress her, feed her, and take her fucking shopping. She was in my face constantly, parading her beautiful body around me like it was no big deal—and it wasn’t. I was focused on my ultimate goal. Skull was going to die for what he did to our family...but then the bullshit started.”

He swallows, his face screwing up like he tastes something bad.

“Skull is easily bored…the things he’d do for entertainment. I felt responsible for the girl, you know? Most of the time I managed to talk him off the ledge, but after a while he got suspicious. By the time he was certain something was going on between us I was too far gone to deny it…and then he tore my life apart for the second time.”

Joel looks at me, his eyes puffy in the glow of the lights above the oven. I clench my teeth. How the hell can I walk away now? How can I walk away and pretend I did the right thing for the rest of my life? Maybe it’s the police officer in me, but an innocent is an innocent. I shake my head. Monique is not your problem. You got what you wanted. Run. Start a new life on the edge of the world.

Joel tilts his head and I bring the cup to my lips, taking a long sip. The cool feel of the smooth glass against my split lip feels heavenly…until the booze pours onto it, burning the busted flesh like acid.

Please, don’t fucking ask me. I need more time to think. Whatever I choose doesn’t only affect me. It affects Ted, Huss, Jessica, and Emily, too.

“Jai...”

I swallow. “I can’t just—”

“I need your help. I’m coming to you as a brother. I know a brother is far from what I’ve been and it’s definitely not the title I deserve right now, but you’re all I got. I will die there without you.”

I tip my head back. Isn’t that some heavy shit? Small eternities pass and I can’t bring myself to provide him with an answer.

“You know, when they had me locked up in of those industrial sheds that smelled like tuna infused asshole—”

I laugh and lower my head, my eyes locking with his. They have a happy curve to them—a curve I haven’t seen in a long time.

“No word of a lie. It was fucking rank.” His tooth filled smile fades and he glances down at his drink. “I remember when I first heard them speak your name. I was sitting in a puddle of water and rust that had leaked through the holes in the ceiling during the night. I was freezing, my body shaking like nothing else. Pick and Ghost were in charge of babysitting me. They talked a lot of shit, most of the time, but one morning I heard your name and I couldn’t believe it.” He pauses to shake his head. “I was so mad at you for following me down this fucked up rabbit hole, but then I heard how well you were doing—how you were crushing everybody and raising absolute hell—and it made me so damn proud. As the days passed and Pick and Ghost became hostile. They spoke about you and how you destroyed this year’s competition and killed their friends…Skull and his buddies won’t forget that, and I guess I’m telling you this because I know they’re on the hunt for you too. I know Skull wants Emily and that you’ll lose a lot if this mission goes sour, but I want you to know that I believe in you…and I believe, with you, we can pull this off. No sweat.”

No sweat? Ha! I’m sure breaking into a heavily guarded criminal compound is a piece of cake. Exhaling through my nose, I drop my stare to my knees. I’m a sucker for speeches—especially Joel’s speeches. My whole life he has been able to inspire and motivate me and it seems he still can. Unfortunately, a decision like this isn’t the same as deciding if I should go to school or not. Innocent lives hang in the balance. If we go down Jessica will have no one left. She’ll be an orphan—like Emily—and I don’t want that for her.

Sliding off the bench, I place my glass on the surface. It’s not easy being torn in two—being torn between what is right and what is right for me. How do I decide? How do I make that decision on behalf of everyone involved and make sure it’s the right one?

I look at Joel. His lips are pursed and his dark eyes are wide with anticipation—like an anxious dog waiting for a treat.

“If it was Emily…” I say, scratching the back of my head. “If it was her locked up there with Skull, would you help me?”

“She wouldn’t need our help. That little firecracker would destroy his house from the inside out.”

“Her bark is bigger than her bite.” I point out, unable to help the smirk forming at the corner of my lips. “She’s strong, but sensitive.”

“Oh…I see.” Joel laughs under his breath, taking a smug gulp of his drink. “How long?”

I frown as my heart kicks up in tempo. Why is it doing that? “How long, what?”

He screws his face, like I’m the idiot. “How long have you been in love with her?”

It’s that obvious, huh? Blood rushes to my face and pools in my cheeks. Thank fuck it’s dark. I stuff my hands into the pockets of my sweatpants.

“How long?” He pushes.

I shrug, impatiently. “We haven’t known each other a long time so—”

“Love is timeless.”

I don’t want to talk about love and feelings with Joel. It’s weird and it makes me feel all uncomfortable and shit. I screw up my face. Now it’s my turn to look at him like he’s the idiot.

“Love is timeless? Okay, Dalai Lama. You’re so inspiring. I might get that tattooed on my chest.”

“Will you two keep it down?” Ted snaps from one of the brown couches. “Shit.”

Joel snorts as he reaches inside the pocket of his checkered pants and pulls out a cigarette.

“You wanna go outside?”

I glance out the small window above the kitchen sink. How cold is it out there? Zero?

“I’ll pass.”

“All right.” He slides off the bench, tucking the cigarette behind his ear. “A slow death for one, got it.”

Shaking my head, I turn around and saunter toward the stairs.

“You gonna do it, Jai?” He utters, making me turn around. “You going to help me get her back?”

With nervous fingers, he toys with his lighter, flipping it over and over with his tips, reminding me of the Joel I knew as a kid. He was always flicking coins and twirling pens. Whenever he was in trouble, he’d toy with his special coin. It had a scary clown on one side and a werewolf on the other. I swallowed it when I was six.

“When were you planning on doing it?” I ask.

“It’s almost five in the morning and we’ll need our sleep tonight so...tomorrow night.”

The decision I’m about to make could possibly be the worst decision I’m ever going to make…but it needs to be done. I can’t carry the guilt of letting him go on his own. If something happens—something my presence could have prevented—it will destroy me. I nod, carving it in stone.

“Okay.” I say. “I’ll do it.”

Trouble

Emily

I tilt my head back, letting the warmth of the morning sun caress my face. It’s the first morning in a while that hasn’t been overly chilly. The occasional whip of breeze stings against the bare skin on my neck, but it’s not cold enough to turn my nipples into sharp icicles.

“And she was insane, right? Hands down the loudest female I’ve ever fucked.”

I roll my eyes, shifting my attention from Ted’s animated, and extremely inappropriate, storytelling to Huss who is laying on his side, relaxed and pain-free. It’s amazing considering no one could look at him yesterday without him complaining like a baby.

Huss runs the inside of his thumb along the bright, yellow petal of a prematurely picked Helenium flower and I find myself staring at it’s dark center, lost in its interesting texture.

I love fall flowers and ornament grasses. Their warm tones mesh well with the browning of leaves and—a light brush over my forearm pulls me from my thoughts as Huss drags the flower up my forearm and then down again. I tilt my head, amazed. Does he have a death wish? As he pushes the soft petals along the inside of my elbow, I pluck it from his fingers, giving him a smug smile.

“You’re gonna get yourself into trouble.” I state, tossing the flower over my shoulder.

Huss’s gray eyes flare as his lips pull into a smirk. “Is trouble your nickname?”

I snort. Smooth.

“Cut it out.” Ted orders, ripping up a handful of grass and tossing it in Huss’s direction. Sadly the featherweight blades blow away in the breeze instead of hitting him in the face. “Jai will kill you and dump your body in the lake and I’m not going to stop him.”

“They’re not dating.” Huss states with a glance at me. “Are you?”

Heat spreads up my neck. “Yes—no—I mean, technically we’re not, but—”

“Then no harm done.” He says, looking back to Ted.

“There’s a little harm done.” Ted argues, resting his thick forearms on his black, cargo-clad knees. “What you’re doing is disrespectful and if you don’t knock it off, there’ll be a lot of harm done—specifically to your physical being.”

I plant my hands on the grass and lean back, locking my elbows as I straighten my legs and cross my ankles.

“Why are you so scared?” Huss asks, pulling a blade of grass from the ground. He doesn’t look at it as he folds it with his fingers, turning it into a little square.

“He’s a bad motherfucker. The punishment I’ve seen him deal on people...trust me, you don’t want to be on the receiving end of it.”

Huss flicks the blade of grass at Ted who swats at it as it hits his cheek and falls to the ground. Huss can talk all he wants. I know he’s only poking fun. Boys like him love to ruffle feathers and stir the pot. It’s the excitement of playing with others that makes them feel fulfilled. Even if he’s serious he should know he’s wasting his time. I’ve never been more uninterested in having sex in my life. Maybe it’s because of the giant skull tattoo on his head…or maybe it’s because I’m too caught up in someone else. Whatever the reason, Huss and I will never happen.

“Jai will eat you alive and you know it.” I laugh and Huss opens his mouth to protest me.

“Anyway,” I say, turning my attention to Ted. “You didn’t finish your story.”

Ted perks up, an incredulous smile inching its way across his lips. I don’t know why he insists on retelling his sex stories. Some are so farfetched I doubt they even happened.

He clears his throat. “As I was saying, when she’d orgasm she’d lose the fucking plot—and not in that sexy, can’t control her legs kind of way.”

Huss is the first to ask. “How’d she come?”

Ted’s flawless, seemingly pore-less, face glazes over in shock and horror as he recalls the event. His stunning golden eyes are bright in the light of the sun, making the black specks of coal visible.

“She’d start punching me in the face, calling me all the names of her exes in alphabetical order. Adam. Punch. Andrew. Punch. Brendan. Wham.” He shuffles closer, eager to get the rest out. “Get this, she was riding me, right, hard. As I was about to come, she jumped off of me and punched me in the fucking nuts.”

A howl of laughter bubbles up my throat and rips out of my mouth. I have to meet this girl. I need to put a face to a name—or orgasm, in this case.

Huss winces, his whole body tightening. “You’re full of shit.”

Ted inches closer. “I swear on my Mama’s life this girl punched me in the nuts right before I was about to blow.”

When he is certain Ted’s story is verified, Huss laughs. He laughs so hard he rolls onto his back to laugh up at the sky. In my chest, my own laughter creates bubbles of genuine happiness—a happiness I imagine comes when you joke around with siblings. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed this hard. Over our laughter, I hear the back door slap against the outside wall. I can’t see who it is through the tears that squeeze themselves from my eyes, blurring my vision.

“I had to get an x-ray to make sure it wasn’t broken, I wasn’t allowed to get erections, and I couldn’t piss straight for a week. That’s why I don’t fuck with white girls anymore.”

Un-bunching my blue hoodie from my elbows, I swipe at my eyes with its sleeve and blink away the blurriness the tears left in time to see Jai saunter over, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He looks good from every angle, especially in his tight black tee that clings to his chest and arms. Last night, he was miserable when he went bed—cranky and clipped—but this morning he woke up content. He and Joel even spoke casually at breakfast, neither inciting rage in the other. It’s nice to see them get along. Their faces are eerily similar when they’re not baring teeth at each other.

“Do I want to know?” Jai asks, his dark eyes scanning over us.

I shake my head. “Definitely not.”

“What’s Joel doing?” Ted asks pushing himself to his feet.

“Polishing the guns and counting the ammunition.”

I frown. “He’s going through with it?”

His eyes meet mine and my heart flutters in my chest. He nods. “I can’t stop him...so I’m going to help him instead.”

My lips part as a shaky breath lets itself out. Mixed emotions swirl through me—worry, regret, anxiety. I’m not ready for this. I want to stay in this bubble forever—far removed from the rest of the world. I’m a different person here and I’m happy. I’m finally happy.

“I’m not going to sugar coat anything for you guys...” Jai clears his throat, his stare flicking between Ted and Huss. “There’s a good chance we won’t make it back here. A handful of us against an army of them? It’s obvious the odds aren’t in our favor.”

Huss and Ted exchange glances as Jai takes a short pause.

“So I’m giving you guys an out. You can leave right now no questions asked. No judgement.”

Ted lets out a laugh and it turns nervous when he realizes Jai isn’t kidding.

“Oh.” A single lingering chuckle bubbles out of Ted. “You’re serious?”

Jai nods. “I’m serious.”

“Un-fucking-believable.” Ted runs the heavy palm of his hand over his face. “Do you know what I do at the precinct? Every morning I wake up, put my uniform on, strap in my gun, and I drive my ass to work. You know what they make me do when I get there?”

Jai shakes his head.

“Traffic control. Can you believe that shit? I became a cop to defend the innocent and catch bad guys. That’s what I was born to do. Instead, I babysit road workers and occasionally direct a vehicle. It’s not fulfilling. It’s not what I signed up for. So I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. I’m gonna defend the innocent and catch the bad guy for once. Then I’ll back to directing traffic.”

Disappoint flashes over Jai’s face, but he recovers quickly, flicking his stare to Huss. I can tell by his face Jai thinks Huss will definitely bow out, but I think Huss enjoys the challenge.

“When do we go?” Huss asks, plucking the slender, yellow petals from another Helenium.

“You’re not going to be very useful, Huss.” I point out. “You couldn’t even put your shirt on this morning without my help.”

He flicks a perfectly shaped eyebrow, his expression coy and smug. “Maybe I could.”

“We go in tomorrow night—and Emily is right. You can’t help, not in your state.”

“So I’ll keep the engine warm.”

Ted shakes his head. “Jord—”

“Don’t Jordan me.” Huss cuts in, turning his glare on Jai. “I supplied the floor plans, I noted the weak entry points—in detail—and I supplied most of the tactile equipment. Do you know how much I have risked and continue to risk for you and your brother? I’m not backing off now and I’m definitely not sitting this one out. No fucking way.”

Ted shrugs. “Suit yourself. What do we need to do to prep for tomorrow?”

“Spend today doing whatever you need to do,” Jai tells them. “but tonight we’re going to have some fun.”

Huss cheers up, swiftly pushing himself into a sitting position despite his busted ribs. “What kind of fun?”

“We’re going out.” Jai looks at me, his expression cloud free. “Darts...drinking...dancing. There’s bound to be a shitty, little bar we can destroy around here somewhere.”

I smile, surprised he wants to take me dancing. His gesture reminds me of something I heard in passing when I nursed at the hospital. An old woman was telling her daughter that there’s something beautiful about a man who listens and that if she ever finds one, she should hold on tight and never let him go. I didn’t understand it at the time. Why would such a common thing be beautiful, right? It isn’t until this very moment I realize what she meant. It’s not the act of listening that is beautiful, it’s the subtle way men process what you’re saying. They might not say anything or even act on it right away, but they store it in their brains and wait for the perfect moment to show you they listened. That’s why a man who listens is beautiful.

And that’s why I know I should heed that old woman’s advice. If only it was that simple.

“What if one of Skull’s people see you?”

Jai shrugs his powerful, broad shoulders at Ted, his indifference rippling through his muscular body and projecting on to everyone else. It’s sexy and the possibilities of how we’ll spend our last night race through my mind. A strange warmth blooms in the nape of my neck and surges south. I don’t care how cold it is I’m still down for swimming naked…provided it’s in a heated pool.

“Going by Huss’s outcome statistics he so kindly wrote up for us, we’re dead anyway. Might as well enjoy our last night.”

“I’m down.” Ted announces with an excited clap of his hands and a clench of his fists. “How long has it been since we hit the town?”

A smirk spreads over Jai’s lips. “A while.”

Ted laughs, unable to stop his body from vibrating with happiness. “I am pumped!”

With a heavy groan he tries to stifle in his chest, Huss forces himself to his feet, his own body exuding excitement in its light movements. I suck air in between clenched teeth. Will I be the one who tells him he can’t drink because of the pain killers and antibiotics he’s taking? Screw it. The poor guy is probably going to die tomorrow anyway.

Ted sizes Huss up with wide, golden eyes as Huss settles into the space beside him.

“You are not coming out in that pink shirt.”

“It’s salmon!”

“It’s pinker than the—”

“—nipples on an albino.” I say, shielding the sun from my eyes. “You’ve already used that one.”

“Really?”

I nod. “Yesterday morning and it prompted Huss to ask what color—”

“—you think the shirt is.” He cuts in, panic flashing across his handsome, but boyish face. “I asked you what color you think the shirt is.”

I tilt my head to the side unable to stop the wide grin from spreading across my lips. He’s not owning up to what he said because Jai’s here? Now who’s scared?

“Oh really? That’s not what I recall you asking.” I turn my attention to Ted. “What was it?”

“If I remember correctly, you asked what color her nip—hey! Where are you going?”

Over his shoulder, Huss flips Ted off as he storms away, as best he can with a limp, and enters the house. I roll my eyes. Jordan Hustel may look like a man, but he acts like a boy. I don’t know much about relationships and the opposite sex, but I do know males who look like men but act like boys are the worst. A man accepts his responsibilities and protects what’s his. A boy panics, is irrational, and will bail at the first notion of impending responsibility.

Huss is a boy.

Jai is a man.

Jai’s eyebrows draw together into that frown I like so much. “Am I missing something?”

Ted chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck with a swift hand. “I’m gonna go reheat some of the breakfast leftovers and then take a nap.”

He slaps Jai on the shoulder and disappears behind his wide frame, leaving us alone. I swallow hard as Jai removes his hands from his pockets and saunters closer to me. There’s no ignoring the pound in my chest the closer he gets.

Thrum.

Thrum.

Thrum.

Seeing him in broad daylight never ceases to amaze me. I don’t think I’ll ever grow tired of it. In the dark tunnels he was mysterious and sexy, his rough, skin tingling voice adding to his dangerous persona, but out here in the light, there’s a sweetness to him. Out here shadows don’t obscure his face.

Out here I see his softer side.

Underground he was precarious. For a short time, he convinced me he was like everyone else down there—a soulless human being, desperate to win the respect of a murdering psychopath. I truly believed Jai was cruel and selfish, uncaring who he hurt on his way to the top to save his corrupted brother.

A brother he so easily murdered for.

What I didn’t see was what the shadows hid. Occasionally, he’d move into a position that allowed the murky glow of the storm lights to illumine his face, chasing away the shadows. In those moments, I saw snippets of the good man he could be and that swayed me to trust him. I’m glad I did. Since emerging, the light has revealed emotions and habits I didn’t have the pleasure of witnessing underground. Like the concern in his face before he makes a difficult decision and the worry that wears down his mind, body, and soul whenever he thinks about his little sister. I’m thankful for the light. I’m thankful I get to witness all of his emotions as they flicker through his eyes and downturn his lips. The light revealed the parts of him I needed to see—the parts that have made it almost impossible for me to ignore the overwhelming flurry of emotions in my chest. It revealed to me that maybe I am capable of letting someone love me and care for me...and maybe, just maybe, I am capable of loving someone in return. It’s in this light that I can’t help but notice my life is the brightest it has been in a long time and, for once, it’s because of someone else...because of the way someone makes me feel.

“Emily?”

I snap back to reality with a startle. “Hm?”

Jai towers over me, his hand outstretched, awaiting mine. “You all right?”

Oh, Jesus. Fuck. Why am I sweating? Despite the cool breeze blowing by, a searing heat suffocates me. Can he tell? Can he tell my body is shutting down because of him? What the shit am I doing? In love for ten seconds and I’m already making a mess of it.

“Uh...” I shake my head. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay.”

Unlike mine, his hand is dry and stable and, with ease, he pulls me to my feet as the next gush of wind blows a sudden and violent case of vertigo into me, causing my head to swirl and my feet to stumble. My ankle doesn’t have time to twist underneath me as Jai wraps an arm around my slender waist and pulls me tight against him.

I sigh a breath of relief before shuddering in embarrassment. Can I be anymore awkward?

“You sure?” He asks, gripping my shoulders and planting me back in my own bubble where I can breathe my own air.

I hate it over here in my own bubble. I want to be with him in his bubble. His bubble is better.

I swipe at my hair, tucking it neatly behind my ears, avoiding eye contact. “Now that you mention it, I’m not feeling myself this morning.”

“I hope last night wasn’t too much for you.” A smirk tugs at the corner of his lips. He swallows it quickly as my brows draw together.

Last night?

“It’s...” He pauses, his lips pressing together as he takes a moment to choose his next words. “I was already so mad and you were teasing me with your tongue, driving me into a goddamn frenzy. I couldn’t help myself.”

Oh! That last night. Embarrassment morphs into heat as it spreads up my neck and tickles my cheeks. Next time, I think I’ll skip the backrubs and the small talk and start with the blowjob. It’s nowhere near as time consuming. I spent the whole day trying to snuggle him back to happy before I gave up and opted for the short cut.

“No. Last night wasn’t too much for me.”

Another hot flush blasts through me, sizzling my nerves in the most delicious of ways as flashes of last night derail my train of thought.

He rakes his hands through my hair, purposely tangling his fingers in its thick, damp locks. He squeezes until they pull at my scalp then he pulls his powerful hips back the slightest amount, allowing me to fill my lungs with the oxygen his cock deprived me off. I gasp for air as the very tip of his penis brushes against the roof of my mouth.

I groan as my head spins, another kick of vertigo slamming into me.

"I’m gonna go...” I mutter, cautiously stepping around him.

“Emily?”

I wave him off and, when he's at least six feet behind me, I cover my face with my hands. I’m going to puke. Anxiety swirls in my stomach, panic mixing with emotions that make me feel happy and light headed. Falling in love is worse than I thought. It’s not just me I have to worry about anymore. It’s like my heart has doubled in size overnight, making room for him. I can’t believe it. I swore I never would...I swore I’d take care of myself and myself only...I swore I would never put myself in a position where I could be tossed aside and left heartbroken...but I let my guard down and...

I love him.

I fucking love him.

Slam

Jai

Sighing, I glance at the small black clock above the kitchen window. It’s been nine hours since she locked herself in the room, four hours since I went upstairs to find her in a cold shower that had been on blast for at least fifty minutes, and an hour and a half since I told her to get ready to go out. Normally, I’d chalk this kind of behavior up to the aggressive, red demon that shows up for a week every month, but Emily insists she can’t menstruate. So either I’ve done something or someone else has.

“You look tense. Have a beer.” Huss announces, slipping a cold beer into my hand. Condensation drips off the freezing glass and runs over my skin.

Huss.

Both Huss and Emily have been weird today. Coincidence?

Involuntarily, my jaw clenches, prompting my fingers to tighten around the bottle in my hand. She wouldn’t. Not with him.

How hard would I have to hit him to lodge a piece of it in his brain?

Ted informed me of all the colorful questions he’s been asking Emily when I’m not around. Ted assures me it’s only in gest. He tells me I shouldn’t worry, but there’s a fine line between poking fun and being disrespectful and he’s crossed it too many times. What kind of man would I be if I ignored it? Huss would see me as easy—as someone he doesn’t have to fear. The only reason I haven't beaten his ass yet is because he's already a cripple. He will fear me. When it comes to Kitten, he should fear me.

“Where’s Emily?”

I look up at Huss. I hate the colorful polo shirts he wears. He’s opted for a strange turquoise tonight over the bright pink he’s been defending since yesterday.

“Broken bones or not, you know I’d kick the shit out of you, right?” I say, popping the lid off my beer.

Feigning confusion, Huss scratches the side of his shaved head, avoiding the gel that holds the middle in place. “Uh...I’m not sure I know what you’re—”

”You know what I’m talking about.” I cut in, lifting the beer to my lips. “If you were smart you’d toy with someone else’s girl.”

His shapely eyebrows shoot up toward his hairline. “Oh. She’s your girl?”

Don't smash your bottle and stab him with it. Don't waste a perfectly good beer.

A smile cracks through his faux shock. “I’m kidding. Ted told me all about you two. I’m only teasing. It’s a bit of fun, that’s all. I swear.”

I slip the bottle between my lips and tip the vessel until the smooth, bubbly beer flows onto my tongue and tickles my taste buds.

“But...” Huss glances over at Ted and Joel who prepare various shots of alcohol in the kitchen. “And this stays between you and me, but if you two decide you want to slip another hotdog into that bun, let me know.”

I stop. Did he suggest what I think he suggested? With tight lips, I swallow my mouthful and lower the bottle.

“Are you suggesting a—”

“An orgy? A three-way? A ménage et trois? Yeah.”

I overtly look him over. Stitches, bruises, broken bones and busted ribs? Is he fucking serious?

“You think you could improve what I already do in the bedroom?” I laugh. “Having you there would only hinder the amount of times I make her come on my own.”

“Please tell me y’all are talking about hot dogs of the edible kind and not of the, you know, cock variety?” Ted interrupts, dropping his heavy body into the recliner next to me.

He brushes fluff off the breast pocket of his black button up shirt before he places his beer on the counter, reaches for his left sleeve and rolls it up to his elbow to match the other.

“Your buddy here is suggesting he and I fuck Emily at the same time.”

Ted freezes as I shift forward, resting my elbows on my knees. Hearing those words aloud and in a sentence doesn’t sit well with me.

Ted turns his wide eyes on Huss with a subtle shake of his head. “What’d I tell you? Are you fucking crazy?”

Huss shrugs his wide shoulders, his smug grin boiling my blood.

“It’s worth a shot. Emily is hot and I wouldn’t mind banging it. Not to mention Jai said he wanted to have fun on his last night so I’m trying to help out. It’s a win-win.”

Banging it. It. Like she's a vagina and nothing else. He makes me sick.

Ted simpers as he leans forward and wraps his fingers around the neck of his bottle. “You’ve got some big balls, Huss. I’ll give you that.”

Huss turns his grin on me. “What do you think?”

“No.”

“No?”

I push myself onto my feet and tower over Huss. He doesn’t back down and I don’t expect him to. As a Special Forces officer I know he’s seen scarier men than me. If he wasn’t already so beat up I’d shove his own foot up his ass.

“No, and if you utter another word—or even think about the possibility of me sharing Emily’s body with you—I’ll hang you from a tree by your nut sack. Understood?”

He blinks his stupid gray eyes at me, the light of a challenge flaring in their depths.

“That’s it? You won’t even consider it? I just want to dip it in—just the tip. I don’t want to take the broad from you. What’s the harm?”

How many times has she put up with these kinds of men in her life? How many times has she settled for something quick—something without substance? It’s no wonder she goes into a state of panic whenever I talk about our relationship. She’s not used to having someone who cares about her wellbeing.

I care.

I care so fucking much and she doesn’t let me show it.

Because of her experience with people like Huss—people who take, and take, but never give. The life I could give her—the houses, the cars—all the fucking ice cream in the world—and she won’t even hear me out?

Because of people like him!

Quickly moistening my lips, I hand my beer to Ted who rushes to his feet.

“Jai, he doesn’t know what he’s saying. He abuses his pain meds.”

I wave him off. “It’s all right. I’m not going to hurt him. I’m just going to—” I slam my fists into Huss’s stomach. Air is forced from his lungs and he curls over in pain, clenching his torso. “Teach him some manners.”

Handing me my beer, Ted warps an arm around Huss’s shoulders and shoots a glare in my direction. “Dude, he was in a car accident.”

I shrug. “I didn’t hit anything important. He’ll be fine in five minutes.”

“He is not a team player.” Huss coughs out, groaning with the pain of his ribs.

“Apparently not.” Ted mutters, escorting Huss over to the couch I was sitting on. “Lay your stupid ass down till you catch your breath.”

I turn away from them and saunter into the kitchen. On the wooden kitchen benches fifteen shots are laid out in various cups and lids and I slip onto a bar stool as Joel pulls his white tee over his head, covering the ink on his torso.

“Was that really necessary?” He asks, adjusting the fabric around the belt of his pants.

I ditch the bottle of beer and opt for a shot instead.

“Absolutely.” I say as I grab the blue lid filled to the brim with clear liquid. Vodka. Its scent is so strong I can taste it before it touches my lips.

I tip the shot down my throat and glance down at the shiny blue lid in my hand as I inhale sharply. I never did like Vodka.

“Emily. Finally!” My brother cheers, his mood a drastic change from the previous days. “Have a drink with us.”

I lift my stare to the hall, where the staircase meets the kitchen, and—holy hell.

A single sleeved tight, black dress clings to her subtle curves, accentuating the shape of her luscious body. I glance at the small, rectangular cut outs that run from the top of her hips, up the flanks of her body that expose the milky flesh of her sides, before it comes to a stop underneath her arms. The fabric clings to the soft curves of her body, electrifying every nerve in my system. Throw in some subtle make-up, thin, nude heels, and long, dark hair that’s pinned back...who is this girl? She’s a far cry away from the tired nurse I met weeks ago. The way she looks...she’s fit to drape the arm of a billionaire.

Which make me wish I hit Huss harder.

What I did to him wasn’t punishment enough for being so disrespectful to someone like her.

I should separate the tip of his cock from his shaft and glue it to his face so every time he looks in the mirror he’s reminded of what a dickhead he is.

“What are you drinking?” Emily asks me, pulling her face into a curious pinch as she steps closer.

“Everything.” I say, slipping my lid on to the bench.

For the first time since entering the room she takes one look at me and a visible bout of nausea rolls through her. It controls her features for the briefest second before she catches it and hides it behind a killer fake smile. What is that about?

“Avoid the small multicolored glasses.” I inform her. “It’s Joel’s homemade concoction and it will have you on your back before we make it out the front door.”

Joel chuckles as he scoops up his beer and leaves the kitchen, abandoning us with each other.

God. She looks good. What does she smell like? Fuck. What does she taste like?

With a defiant smirk and a purposeful kink in her eyebrow, Emily reaches out and wraps her slender fingers around a small, multicolored glass.

“I suppose I won’t need this to put me on my back...not when I have you to do it for me later.”

She surveys the liquid before returning it to the bench, opting for a shot of vodka instead.

If she’s not careful I’ll have her on her back, stomach, knees—fucking hands. I’ll have her any way, every way. I will tear her dress from her tight little body and tie her to the bed with it. I’ll gag her with her own panties and fuck her ass while she wears those skin color shoes. I’ll hit it so good she’ll never need the dick again. I’ll satisfy her for life—and that’s a goddamn promise. Unaware of my violent and sexual thoughts, Emily smiles at me before she tips her shot down the hatch.

Swallowing, she clenches her teeth with a hiss. “That’s awful.”

“Better than the stuff we were drinking underground.”

Her smile grows wider as she tips her head to the side, her hair cascading down the length of her bicep. I want to pull it. I want to wrap it around my knuckles while I fuck her from behind.

“I don’t know. I kind of like the taste of whiskey mixed with the nasties of the sewer.”

I laugh once. God, she’s amazing.

I want her closer.

I want her against me.

Shifting, I angle my body away from the bench and slap my thigh. “Come here.”

I want her close enough to smell. I want to see the perfect lines of her lip liner and the shimmer in the swirl of blush on her cheeks. I want to admire it while I can because later I’m going to smear it over her face with the tip of my cock.

Emily leans forward, gripping the edge of the bench and locking her arms at the elbow. “All the way over there? In these shoes?”

“They’re not comfortable?”

She shrugs. “They’re not too bad. I mean, they’re no Louis Vuitton, but they do all right.”

Note to self; get the girl some damn Louis Vuitton shoes.

I arch a brow. “And you packed them because...?”

The soles of her heels clack against the floorboards as she rounds the bench. Most people favor the sound of rain as it patters against a tin roof.

Not me.

I love the sound of high heels. Nothing sounds better than a woman dressed to the nine’s, her feet encased in tight, slender materials, as she marches her way to wherever she’s going. Heels symbolize Power. Sassiness. Sexiness.

Heels are my fucking undoing.

Especially on her.

It makes sense, I mean, Superman has kryptonite and I have...I have women’s shoes.

Emily saunters the last few steps before resting in the space between my legs.

“Let’s just say I didn’t pack them for dancing.” She utters, her long, black lashes seemingly never ending.

God, give me the strength to hold off on my threat of gagging her with her own underwear. At least until we get back. What is she wearing under that fabric anyway? Lace? Silk? Or maybe cotton, like the pair she had when we were in the tunnels?

I close my eyes for the briefest moment as she twirls, giving me her back. I wrap my arms around her waist and hold her close. Her shoulders tighten and the tips of her slender fingers dig in to my thigh as I lean in close and brush my lips against the shell of her ear.

“Watch yourself, Kitten. Don’t think I won’t kick everyone out and bend you over this countertop.”

She turns her head, twisting until her ear is replaced by her soft cheek. “Is that a threat?”

I hold her tightly in my arms, squeezing her just enough to aid me in getting my point across.

“That’s a promise.”

She twirls in my arms again, my heart increasing in tempo when she stops, her nose brushing mine and her chest resting gently against me. Strangely, she sways slightly in my arms, as if her ankles are moving on their own. That’s when I notice the slight heaviness to her eyelids and the drunken curl of her lips.

How is that even possible?

“Emily? Are you drunk already?”

Emily pulls back, focusing her dark eyes on mine. “I am certainly not drunk.”

I frown. I’m definitely not buying that.

“I mean...I may have been drinking for a little while longer than everyone else, but I’m not drunk.”

“How much longer?”

“Not long.” She glances at the clock. “Since six p.m.”

“That was over two hours ago. How is that even possible?”

“Joel came up to check on me while you were out on your run. He brought booze and I drank it.”

“Why?”

She avoids my eyes. “Because I wouldn’t be able to face you otherwise.”

“I’m confused. Did I do something wrong?”

Emily cringes, expressing another visual display of the nausea and stress she feels inside.

“No. It’s not you, it’s me. I needed the booze because...because I...shit. This isn’t how I imagined this would go.”

“This isn’t how you imagined what would go?”

She opens her mouth only to clamp it shut as a hand slaps against my shoulder. You’ve got to be kidding me?

“You two ready to roll?”

Emily pulls herself out of my arms and I turn my head to face Ted. Unsurprisingly, his wide, cheerful grin falls when he sees my expression so I’m guessing I don’t look happy.

“Shit. Did I interrupt something?”

Ignoring him, I blow out an exhale and reach for another shot—a double—the one in the big blue glass—and I tip it down my throat.

On the other side of the kitchen, Emily focuses on her own breathing exercises as she pours herself a cup of chilled water. She drinks it quicker than I drank my shot of booze. What was she going to say? A million possibilities run through my mind and the only one that keeps coming back, like an annoying fly, is the one involving Huss. Why do I keep sandwiching them together in my head? I don’t know. Maybe it’s because Huss is slimy and I don’t trust him. Or maybe it’s because Emily has a long list of insecurities. She’s always putting me on a pedestal, always boosting me up while putting herself down. She sees herself as a woman who is unworthy of me and she sees me as a man who is using her—a man who is exploiting her body because she’s the only choice I have. It’s not true, I know that, but that’s how she works. That’s how her brain works.

To me, it’s simple.

I love her—and not because she’s the only female caught up in this gigantic fuck of a mess with me. I’d tell her how I feel, but it’d only arm her with another insecurity to use against herself. If I’m being honest with myself, her insecurities terrify me. I’m terrified that if I tell her I love her she’ll panic. She’ll panic and fuck the whole thing up by sliding into bed with someone she’s familiar with—a personality that has fucked her over a million times. That’s comfortable for her because it’s what she’s used to. It’s why I don’t like Huss sniffing around—even if he claims he’s only kidding.

It’s like they say; behind every joke is a hint of truth. If that’s true, I guess that makes Huss one honest motherfucker.

Fallen

Emily

My heart pounds. My nerves are shot. They vibrate through my entire body from the epicenter of his index finger as it swirls in tiny circles halfway up my inner thigh.

Heat flares, scorching me.

My blood thins, making my brain roll in my skull.

I’m incredibly turned on—unbelievably aroused.

I suck in an inhale, but it does nothing to ease the burn in my lungs. He’s close to me—so close I can taste his cologne in the back of my throat.

I came to terms with being in love with Jai today and since that moment, everything about him had multiplied tenfold—his touch, his smell, his voice—They’re all now a part of a unique passcode to my body. Unless you’re him access is denied.

I swipe at the thin line of sweat bubbling along my top lip and hit the window button. Cold air blasts my face, instantly freezing the tip of my nose, but it feels good.

It feels great.

I pull my black jacket around my shoulders. I’m happy I decided to put a warm jacket and thick leggings on underneath my dress before we left. It’s so nice inside the lake house, I forget it’s as cold as a snowman’s asshole outside.

Sucking in one last inhale, I pull up the window before the cold air manages to turn my nose to ice. As the glass slips tightly into its socket, a howl of laughter tears through the car, signaling the end of Ted’s story. I’m glad I missed it. I don’t think I can stomach hearing another descriptive monologue of his penis as it enters a vagina. He’s proud of his sex stories—it’s as if he fucks just so he has something to talk about. I’d hate to be one of the girls in his stories.

Ted reaches around the driver’s seat, extending his beer to Huss who, by someone’s stupid decision, is the designated driver. I don’t know whose idea it was to make the guy who has been abusing his pain pills drive the car—not to mention he has a broken arm, bruised ribs, and a whole lot of stitches. If the stress of not telling Jai I love him doesn’t kill me, then I’m certain Huss’s driving will. That being said, I’m glad I have the window seat. Jai kindly switched out so I didn’t have to be sandwiched between him and Ted—which, if I’m being honest, wouldn’t be such a bad thing under different circumstances.

Huss shrugs Ted’s bottle away. “I’m driving, asshole. I don’t fancy being in another car accident any time soon.”

“You’re a police officer.” I point out peering around Jai to look at Ted. “You should know the law.”

With a hearty laugh, Ted rolls down his window and tosses his bottle of beer outside. It whirls away. Whether or not it smashed on the asphalt, I have no idea.

“I’m dying tomorrow.” Ted announces. “Fuck the laws!”

He unclips his seat belt and moves toward the window. My heart leaps into my throat as my stomach heaves.

“Ted—” I reach across Jai, but he catches my hand.

“You’re wasting your breath.”

He threads his fingers through mine. My stomach twists painfully and my hands grow clammy. Jai notices and squeezes my hand tighter. It doesn’t help. All I can do is watch as Ted drunkenly climbs out the window and sits on the door, his feet resting casually on the back seat. I can barely put up with sitting correctly in my seat with my seat belt on. How can he be outside the vehicle while it’s moving?

“Wait for it...” Jai mutters.

Huss laughs, glancing excitedly between the road and his side mirrors. “Three...two...one...”

“Fuck the police!” Ted shouts. “Whoooooo!”

Once again, laughter rips around the car and it eases my tension. Their laughter is infectious and it makes me feel good—like I belong here. Hell, my own laugh even bubbles in my chest.

It’s funny how it works. I’m on the run from a psychopathic murderer and the world thinks I’m dead. By all accounts I should be miserable and paralyzed by fear. I’ll admit I’m terrified. Most nights I hardly sleep and the thought of the future is enough to reduce me to tears, but, in moments like these, I’m having the time of my life. If I had the chance to relive the past month or two I would and I wouldn’t change a thing. Why? Because I’ve learned a lot about myself and about life. They’re lessons I wouldn’t have learned anywhere else—lessons I’d hate to learn anywhere else.

***

Crasssssshhhh!!

I jump, clenching Jai’s forearm as the doors to the rundown establishment fly open, exposing a bulky, bald headed man in a leather vest. In his hands, he clenches a lean, beanstalk of a man whose face is all beat-up, his skin painted with black and purple bruises. Freeing his arm from my grip, Jai wraps it around my waist and swiftly pulls me to the side as the skinny man is tossed off the porch and down the stairs. I gasp as his frail body hits the dirt with a thud. Groaning, he curses into the ground, his blood turning the dirt into mud as it mixes with the earth.

“Holy shit!” Ted booms, holding back a laugh. “What’d he do?”

The aggressive man with the strong toss, disappears behind the black wooden doors as they slam shut, trapping the sounds of rock music and laughter behind it.

“Ignore him.” Joel states, brushing past me.

He clears the five stairs in two bounds, reluctantly slowing down when he realizes we’re not following. With an exhale betrayed by the sudden drop of his annoyed shoulders, Joel turns around.

“He’s hurt.” I point out, even though it’s obvious.

“It’s not our problem.”

Of course it’s not. It’s easier to ignore someone in need than to help. Unsurprisingly, Huss and Ted step around me and join Joel on the porch.

“You’re kidding?” I say, scowling at the three of them.

Ted shrugs his wide shoulders. “It’s kind of a buzzkill and besides, look at him. He’s homeless.”

I glance down at the small, old man who now sits on his ass, clenching his ribs. I can see how Ted came to that conclusion. The stranger’s hair is matted together, strands glued with blood and booze. His skinny, black jeans are torn around the knees and his Black Sabbath shirt is stained and sagging at the collar. Despite all that, despite the fear of him lashing out at me or sticking me with a used syringe, I step away from Jai and move closer to the man.

“Sir? Are you all right?”

“Emily...” Jai mutters, concern laced with warning clear in his low tone.

He looms over me, a protective lover at my back, pressing his wide palm firmly against my hip.

“Just another typical Thursday.” The man forces out, his voice trapped inside his boney chest. “I think I’ll be okay.”

His body quakes and shakes as he rolls onto his side and pushes himself on to all fours. He holds himself in that position for a little while, dragging on the seconds as if his pain will ease long enough for him to push himself onto his feet.

“Is there anything we can do for you?”

“Not unless you’re a doctor—ahhh.”

Stepping around me, Jai grabs the old man’s forearm and bicep and helps him to his feet. Jai gives me a look—pursed lips and a slight frown. He’s not happy about helping the old man, but he’s doing it anyway. For me. Someone fucking catch me before I swoon myself into a coma.

“You don’t smell too good, old man.” Jai states, turning his face up to the sky.

“You can talk. How much of that cologne are ya wearin? Jesus Christy. D’you soak your clothes in it?”

Panting, the man reaches for his front pocket and frees a shitty little cellphone. “Call me an ambulance.”

He tosses the phone to me and, luckily, even in the dim light, I manage to catch the ancient device.

“No, you go inside.” Jai says, holding his hand out. “I’ll call the ambulance and take this gentleman to the bus stop down the drive. They’ll find him easier there.”

I hand him the phone. “Are you sure? Because I don’t mind—”

“I’m sure. I’ll only be a second. Stay with Joel, all right? Don’t leave his side until I get back.”

I step back, my palms exposed. “Okay. I’ll stay with Joel.”

Supporting the bulk of the man’s weight, Jai escorts him through the parking lot and disappears into the shadows cast by the looming oak trees. I turn back to the building, unable to stop the shiver that shoots through me, lodging my heart in my throat. It doesn’t make sense to me why we’d come to a place where men are getting tossed out doors and I can’t even walk around by myself. Although, I guess we’re kinda limited on places we can go in terms of being seen. Still, I’d just about take anywhere else over this run down, tin shed of a building. On a thick plank of wood nailed to the roof of the bar is a makeshift sign. The words ‘THE CAVERN TSMC’ are chiseled into it. Underneath its headline is a sentence. ‘In honor we fight. In death we rest.’

I’m not sure what it means, but it’s definitely not a slogan you can feel good about.

“It’s good fun here, Em.” Joel calls from the porch. “You’ll love it.”

Joel pushes open the doors and enters the premise, leaving me outside in the cold. I stare after him. He’s not even going to wait for me? My heart pounds in my chest, the stress of indecision eating me up. Do I go find Jai and beg him to take me home or do I follow Joel into the scary building and hope I’m not going to be gang raped the second I step foot inside?

AWOOOOOOO!

I jump as a dog howls close by and that just about settles it. I am not about to be eaten alive by rabid dogs.

“Joel! Wait!” I rasp in a rough whisper. “Wait for me!”

My shoes clack loudly against the rickety wooden steps and are even louder once I step onto the porch. I reach for the doors and they whoosh open at the last second, slamming against the tips of my fingers. I squeak as I slam on my brakes, clenching my hand to my chest.

I smell the leather first, then the booze, and, finally, the cigarette. I trail my stare up the man in front of me. Huge, black boots for stomping skulls into the ground, thick, coarse jeans for wiping the blood off his knife with, a plain black t-shirt to no doubt stuff in someone’s mouth as he’s beating the hell out of them, and a worn leather vest with ‘Vice President Devil’s Cartel Motorcycle Club’ stitched into the breast of it. I shrink into myself as I finally flick my gaze to his face. Oily, chin length hair filled with natural waves hang down the sides of his face as he glares down at me. His eyes are dark, as black as tar, and he has a scar that runs through his eyebrow.

I gulp.

He’s a beast. A delicious, manly beast.

“Uh...hell..ooo.” I cringe, wrapping my arms around my body—a strange defense mechanism I didn’t know I had.

“You’re blocking my way.” He bites out, his voice rough like gravel.

“Oh, right. Sorry.” I slip to the side, giving him space to beat his chest and storm off. “Sorry.”

Instead of leaving, he flicks his cigarette to the floor and stamps it into wood with his heavy, black boot, overtly looking me up and down. “Whose whore are you? Bones’s? Crow’s? That fucking piece of shit Joker’s?”

What the fuck are they? More importantly, did he call me a whore? Why am I a whore?

“Um...I’m no one’s whore.”

He leans in close and the race of my heart feels like betrayal.

“Are you sure?”

I gulp again. “Yes.”

“Is there a problem here?” Relief floods at the sound of a familiar voice. Stepping to the side, the Vice President of the Devil’s Cartel turns around and I see Joel at the doors, his fists clenched at his sides.

“She’s with you?” The biker asks, folding his thick arms across the wide expanse of his chest.

Joel steps out from the doorway and the door closes behind him, clicking shut with finality. With confidence, Joel swallows the distance between us. What is he—oh! I startle as he slides his hand around my hip—too close to the curve of my ass for my liking—and pulls me tight against his body.

“Yeah, she’s with me.”

My heart pounds in my ears as the stranger closely examines Joel. Please don’t recognize him. Please don’t recogni—”

“I know you.”

Shit.

“You’re one of Skull’s men.”

Joel’s body tightens, his fingers digging painfully into my hip. I shift my hips, but his grasp doesn’t let up.

“I was. Not anymore.”

“Hmph.” The stranger’s dark and dangerous stare pegs Joel in his spot and a small eternity passes before he retrieves a packet of cigarettes from his breast pocket.

“If you ever see that motherfucker again, tell him Stoic is looking for him.”

He drums a thick, callused finger along the bottom of his packet.

“No.”

My heart stops. So does the biker’s tapping.

“The next time I see him I’m going to beat him within an inch of his life and then put a bullet through his fucking head.”

A staring contest breaks out, neither Joel nor the stranger backing down. I have to admire Joel for his courage. This strange man makes me want to pee everywhere, like a terrified puppy. By some miracle, the tiniest smirk tugs at Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome’s lips.

“Good. We’re on the same page then.”

He extends his cigarette packet to me. All of the butts are aligned. Except for one. One juts out above the others and I assume it’s for me. Without hesitation, I take it and he offers one to Joel who shakes his head. Without a word, the mysterious man walks off, stomping from the porch, down the stairs and into the parking lot.

I suck in a large inhale and hold it until my lungs threaten to burst then I blow it out.

“You smoke?”

“Nope.” I toss the cigarette off the porch. “But I wasn’t about to turn him down. Who was that anyway?”

“That was Stoic. VP of the Devil’s Cartel Motorcycle Gang from Exeter, California.”

“California? What’s he doing here?”

Joel drops his hand from my hip.

“Settling some stuff with Joker, probably. They’ve got a lot of history.”

I lean in close, so close I’m certain no one else can hear me.

“You brought us to a biker bar? Are you nuts?”

He grins. “This is the only place Skull’s eyes won’t see us. Besides, they’re friendlies. Relax.”

Joel turns away and re-enters the bar.

Awwwwooooooo! The dog howls sending tendrils of fear barreling through my stomach. I am not waiting around out here. I snatch the handle in my hand and yank the door open.

“I need a drink.”

The Joker and the Crow

Jai

“Ughhh!” The old man groans as I lower him onto the black, wooden bench under a flickering streetlight.

Exhaling, I sit his phone down next to him.

“All right, old man. The ambulance should be here soon.”

“Thanks for your help, Pal. Do me a favor...” He hisses through his teeth, sliding his body on an uncomfortable angle. “Stay away from Crow’s daughter. Otherwise, you’ll end up like me.”

I dust my hands, unable to help my smile. “I’m sure that won’t be a problem.”

“Speaking of women—and problems—that pretty lil’ thing you’re with. What’d you call her?”

“Emily.” I say, flatly.

“Emily...she yours?”

“Is she mine?” I shift my weight onto my left leg and fold my arms across my chest.

What kind of question is that in this day and age? Do I own her? Do I possess her?

No.

Women aren’t like cars or animals and they certainly don’t come with ownership papers. So, no. I don’t own her. That being said, do I want her only for myself? Would I kill to keep her for me and me only?

Yes.

In that sense, she is mine. I could open up that can of worms with this old man, but then I’d be wasting more of my time out here, arguing with an old man instead being of inside, enjoying my last night. So, to answer his question I tell him she’s mine.

He nods, clenching his teeth as he pushes himself up into a seated position. “I, uh, I don’t tell a lot of people this cuz they’ll think I’m crazy, but you helped me so I’m gonna help you.”

With a suspicious scowl, amplifying the swelling to his right eye, he glances around us, making sure no one is listening.

This is ridiculous. He’s lucky Emily cared enough to help him. Before her, I was siding with Joel to leave this guy in the dirt. Who knows where he’s been or what he’s involved in. Being tossed from the porch of the bar that belongs to the Twisted Sons MC tells me he isn’t someone I should be helping.

“No. It’s okay. You don’t need to return the f—”

“I’ve got a gift.”

I glance away, uninterested. “A gift?”

He hisses, exhaling in sharp, short spurts. “I can feel the vibes of a person’s future—not everyone—but some.”

Silence falls, allowing the sounds of night to be heard clearly. This man, the man who has had his face smashed in, his ribs broken, and his lung punctured, claims he can feel the future—not see it. Feel it. What kind of bullshit is that?

“How much have you had to drink? That’ll hinder how many pain killers you’re going to get.”

He clenches his ribs with bony fingers. “I’m telling the truth. Your girl, Emily, she’s in for a lot of trouble. I felt it.”

I roll my eyes and turn away, stepping off the thin slab of desecrated concrete and onto the hard gravel. “Yeah. Okay. You keep yourself safe until the ambulance arrives, all right?”

“You don’t believe me?” He calls out, his voice drowned with pain. “I’m telling the truth. When her life starts falling apart don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

I stop in my tracks and swipe at my top lip. Is it a bad idea to indulge him? If he is in fact talking shit then what have I got to lose? I turn around, stuff my hands into my pockets, and step back onto the concrete. I shouldn’t be doing this. I shouldn’t be enabling his behavior.

“I’ll humor you.” I say. “What’d you feel?”

In the distance, I hear sirens. They loop, over and over, growing closer and closer.

Suddenly in a hurry, the man shifts on the seat again, panting harshly. “I looked at her and I felt pain...an unbearable pain my belly.”

He’s kidding, right? Perhaps I should remind him how we found him.

“You were beaten and thrown off a porch.” I point out.

He shakes his head. “This is different. I felt it only when I looked at her. There was a strange ripplin’ sensation over me lips. The guy...the one who told her to ignore me...he’s your kin?”

I nod.

“His pain is connected to hers...I felt embarrassment...and pleasure.”

I flinch. Pleasure? That’s not right. That can’t be right.

“Now I know you’re talking shit, old man.”

Joel would never betray me like that—neither would Emily. Besides, pleasure doesn’t necessarily mean it’s sexual. I get pleasure when I allow myself to eat a nice chocolate mousse after a week of disciplined eating. Still, uneasiness settles in my stomach as the seed of jealousy grows. The mere thought of them together turns my stomach.

He shrugs his slender shoulders, his breath hitching as he does it. “Believe what ya want. I know what I felt.”

“That’s it? You felt your insides go funny when you looked at her and now you think you know her future? Here’s a newsflash for you, I feel funny when I look at her too. She’s pretty. It’s biology.”

The old, beaten man shakes his head. “Sure, she’s pretty, but that ain’t what I’m talking ‘bout.” He stops to catch his breath. “Fuck it hurts to speak. Her life only goes downhill from ‘ere.”

“What about me?” I ask, determined to expose him for what he is. “What do you feel when you look at me?”

“So now you’re a believer? Funny how that works.” He coughs and groans, causing fresh blood to spill from the cut on his eyebrow. “I told you. I don’t feel vibes from everyone. I get nothing when I look at you.”

Well, isn’t that fucking convenient.

I laugh once. “You’re drunk and full of shit.”

“Maybe I am, but tell me if any of these ring a bell—bullets, chains, and skulls. Those three random objects floated into my mind from nowhere when I looked at your little lady.”

My heart lodges itself into my throat. There’s no way that’s possible. Absolutely no way.

“You’re fucking insane.” I turn around and leave, washing my hands of this mess.

He laughs—no—he cackles. It’s loud and haunting as it echoes around me. “You don’t think I fucking know that? You don’t think I know?!”

He’s talking shit. A goddamn nut job who has had too much beer. I don’t believe a word he said. Why should I? His brain drowned in malted barley and yeast a long time ago.

But then again...if I don’t believe him, why is my heart thrumming in my ears as loud and as obnoxious as a bass drum? A cold drop of sweat falls from my hair line and rolls down the back of my neck. Why am I nervous? It’s not possible.

I shake my head. A drunk. That’s all he is. I’m sure the feeling of pleasure he felt when he looked at Emily was nothing more than a perverse twitch of his cock—Joel too. Maybe his sexual hinge allows him to swing both ways. It makes sense. I don’t know why I entertained him as long as I did, anyway. It’s done nothing but deter me from my night and invade my thoughts. The last thing I need is some crazy old man planting what ifs in my head. I don’t need the distraction. Not tonight.

Gravel crunches under my feet, the sound soon swallowed by the blasting of sirens. The darkness around me lights up in a flurry of reds and blues.

At least that’s one good deed I’ve done today.

As I enter the main parking lot, a beefy man on a Harley Davidson zooms past me, not giving a shit that rocks flick up from his tires and bounce off the others bikes and cars. Why would he give a shit? It’s not like he paid for any of them.

Jerk.

I pause as I approach the steps of The Cavern, suddenly weighed down by stress as it sits like a heavy bucket of concrete on my shoulders. I glance at the door. I don’t even want to go in there. I’m tired...exhausted.

Maybe they feel the same. Maybe they want to go home too.

Forcing myself up the steps, I reach the doors and push them open. Rock music mixes with laughter and the clashing of glasses. I stand still, marveling that this shitty little building manages to keep majority of the sounds inside. Stepping in, I glance around the room, letting the double doors slam shut behind me.

At the bar, Joel keeps Emily busy and, judging by their expressions, they’re engaged in lighthearted conversation—embarrassing stories about my childhood, no doubt. At the end of the bar, Huss sits, sulking soberly in to his glass of water and, across the room, Ted leans over a tall table, his foot casually resting on a stool, as he chats up a petite, blonde girl. Immediately, I notice the crow tattoo on the side of her neck. It looks strange on her. How old is she anyway? She has the face of child’s doll—big eyes, a small, pointy nose, and fake, wiry hair to match. If I guessed her age on a whim I’d peg her at sixteen and no older than eighteen. Unlucky for him, Ted has never been good at establishing ages before engaging with a female. Twice I’ve saved him from going to bed with underage girls—seventeen year olds. I can’t blame him. It’s getting harder these days to pin point a woman’s age.

I glance back to the crow tattoo on the girl’s neck.

A crow.

Shit.

Is she the girl the old man was talking about? The one who had him beaten and kicked out? Of course Ted naturally found himself drawn to her. He’s always chasing women who cause him the most problems. His last girlfriend was an abusive drunk. She beat him with a led pipe while he was sleeping because he didn’t take out the cat litter like he said he would.

I run my cool palms over my burning face. For once, just once, I’d like to relax instead of babysit a bunch of adults. Unfortunately, I’m the reason Ted is here so it’s my responsibility to look out for him. Preventing Ted getting beaten by this girl’s father will prevent me having to kick someone’s ass later on.

I make my way over to Ted, dodging men in leathers and women in lingerie as they go back and forth from the bar, milling about like fish in a pond.

“Ted. I need to talk—”

BANG!

I freeze as tiny pieces of the roof fall down around me, coating my black sweater in white dust. I snap my head in Emily’s direction. She’s off her stool. She clenches it in her hands, her knuckles white from the pressure. Her chest heaves, her wide eyes on me. That’s when I feel the cool tip of a gun pressing firmly against the back of my skull. I react quickly, based on instinct, not thought. Sidestepping, I duck under his gun, grab the barrel and twist it out of his hand. The assailant grunts as I turn my body, over his arm, and punch him square in the face. He drops to his knees and I press the gun into the side of his head. I hear the click of more guns around me and my finger twitches against the trigger.

“Jai! Stop!” Joel shouts, his voice penetrating the sound of rushing blood in my ears.

Panting, I glance around the room. I see barrel after barrel of ready to fire guns pointed at me.

At Emily.

At my brother.

At my friends.

I look at Joel. His dark eyebrows are furrowed and his hands are raised, exposing his palms. What the fuck is he surrendering for?

“You’ve got to be kidding me. You think you can just waltz in here, sit at my bar, on my stools and drink my beer?”

My finger twitches against the trigger again as the booming voice echoes around the bar. Seconds pass, seconds that feel like an eternity, before I can put a name to the voice. He looks more menacing in person than he does in the mugshots on his file. A buzz cut. Dark, tar-like irises and a scar that runs through the side of his lips. Finally, I meet the famous Cain ‘Joker’ Peterson, President of the Twisted Sons Motorcycle Club, in person.

“Good to see you, Joker.” Joel says, sending my stomach dropping like a bag of rocks into my shoes.

Joker waltzes further from the shadows and soon enough his entire wide, six foot two frame is exposed in the light. The heavy thud of his boots stop as he pauses by Huss. Like the soldier that he is, Huss betrays no sign of fear even though he’s as weak as a child in this moment with no protection and no chance of fighting his way out. With a chuckle, Joker lifts his Remington M870 Police Magnum Shotgun and nudges Huss’s cast. Huss clenches his teeth with a hiss as his entire body tightens.

A single laugh filled with insult and amusement flies from Joker’s thin lips. “Quite a pathetic crew you’ve brought along with you this time.”

“I’m not here to fight you, Joker. If we can talk for one second—”

With heavy feet, Joker presses the butt of the shotgun into his shoulder and swallows the distance between him and Joel. I slam the butt of my gun into my attacker’s head and he crashes to the floor as I swing it in Joker’s direction. The sound of hammers being pulled surrounds me, but do nothing to deter me from protecting my brother. If anyone is going to kill him, it’ll be me as soon as we get out of here.

Temptation pulses in my index finger as it rests against the trigger, but I manage to hold out, even as Joker presses the tip of his shotgun against Joel’s forehead.

“You don’t get to talk.” Joker snaps, his hands clenching his weapon.

“You think your shotgun intimidates me?” Joel simpers, sealing the lid on all of our coffins. “There’s nothing scary about a quick death so do me a favor and pull the damn trigger.”

“Don’t tempt me, boy.” Turning his head, Joker spits on the floor. “Why’d you come here?”

“I have a favor to ask.”

He came to ask a favor? So tonight isn’t about enjoying ourselves before we’re gunned down like fucking deer? I should have known! That selfish mother f—

“A fucking favor? Ha! After everything you’ve done?”

“That was then. I’m not working for Skull anymore. I want him dead just as much as you do.”

“Bullshit!” Joker glances down the length of his gun.

“I’ll prove it—I’ll prove it! Just give me a second of your time—in private—and I’ll tell you everything. I want to end Skull. When he’s gone, you can have New York back. It’ll be yours again. I promise you.”

The fuck it will be. New York isn’t Joel’s to give.

Joker’s jaw ticks, contemplating Joel’s words. Why is he doing this? Why the fuck is he recruiting the Twisted Sons? And why does he need me—any of us—if he’s getting their help?

“Kid! Holy shit. Is that you?”

From the back room, a familiar man steps out. Graham? Last time I saw him, we were drinking with those two girls in the tunnels. He’s alive? How? I was sure Skull would have killed him by now.

I look at Emily so does everyone else.

“Pops?” Emily asks, her disbelief reflecting in her wide eyes, following through to the tone of her voice.

Joker adjusts the grip on his gun. “You know these other assholes, Crow?”

Graham Crow? He is Graham Crow? Of course he is. How’d I not put two and two together?

“I know her.” Crow states, glancing around the room until his dark eyes settle on me. “Him too.”

“Who the hell are they?”

“They were in the tunnels with me. They’re the ones who killed a handful of Skull’s men and escaped. They’re the reason he flooded the tunnels, killing just about everyone in them.” He beams widely as he adjusts his leather vest. “Good to see you.”

I swallow hard and nod. How many people were down there? I can’t remember. Still, the news of their death is another bucket of concrete on my shoulders. Their death is my fault.

Emily clears her throat. “Y-you mind helping us out?”

“Sure, once you tell us why you’re liaising with the man that killed my nephew.”

Jesus. I scowl at Joel. What else has he done that he’s failed to mention?

“Your nephew pulled a gun on me. I had no choice.” Joel’s attention flicks back to Joker. “Do you want your city back or not? Tomorrow night. All you gotta do is hear me out.”

Joker grinds his teeth, the thick muscles in his jaw clenching tightly. His knuckles are white, his fingers fighting the urge to pull the trigger. In my own hands, the gun is wet—slick with the efforts of my muscles as they fight the desire to shoot Joker in the head.

I can do it.

One squeeze. That’s all it will take.

“New York. You can guarantee me New York?”

Joel nods, moving the shotgun with his head. “I’ll deliver the city to you on a silver platter.”

Silence falls and it’s deafening. This is it. Decision time. We’re either going to die right here, right now, or we’ll live. To be honest...I don’t know which is worse.

Inhale

Emily

I can’t breathe. In my grasp, the vinyl on the stool is damp from the fearful sweat leaking from my palms. Joker is scary. A forty-something year old monster in leathers. He smells like whiskey and weed all mixed in with pussy and gun powder.

Jai has the same look on his face as Huss and Ted do. They’re pissed. They feel betrayed and why wouldn’t they? Joel lied to us. He brought us to this hell hole. He claimed it’s a place Skull and his people wouldn’t see us. Yeah, no shit. It’s because we’re hiding in the house of Skull’s enemy. Joel has balls, I’ll give him that, but he has risked all our lives without asking and that’s never okay.

My heart pounds like nothing else as my stare flicks between the gun pressed into Joel’s head, less than a feet away from me, and Jai—who is on the other side of the room with a gun in his hand and an unconscious man at his feet. I estimate twenty guns pointed in his direction and it makes me sick.

One slip.

All it takes is one little slip and he’s gone…and I haven’t even told him how I feel about him.

Joker lowers his gun, leaving an angry red circle in the middle of Joel’s forehead.

“Let’s talk.” He states, resting the gun against his shoulder as he turns around and walks the length of the bar with Joel on his heel.

No one moves. We wait, silently, until Joker and Joel disappear into the back room. Then, and only then, does my body allow me to empty my lungs and inhale fresh air.

“Lower your guns.” Pops—a.k.a Crow—orders, crossing the room to Jai and Ted. “It’s over.”

I release the stool and glance at my damp hands. They shake—vibrating like an airport runway. I don’t know how long I glance at my hands or why I’m feeling so numb. My stomach churns with emptiness and any lingering effects from the alcohol I’ve ingested tonight are gone. Scared sober. I guess it really is possible.

“How are you doing, kid?” I jolt, snapping my head up.

Crow stuffs his hands into the pockets of his black jeans. I survey his vest. The leather work is impeccable and the detail of the pale orange raging bull sewn into the breast of it is amazing.

“The usual…cheating death.” I chuckle nervously, rubbing my opposite elbow with my hand.

He smiles, his thin lips pulling up at the corners, and it’s friendly. “It’s good to see you.”

I offer him a fake smile. Is it though? I mean, he was going to let Joker kill us.

“You too.”

“You thirsty?” Crow moves close to the bar and rests his elbows on the scratched wood. “Lip! Two beers.”

I glance down the length of the bar and the man behind it, the one he called Lip, gives him a thumbs up. Huss catches my eye then as he lifts his glass of water to his mouth. His hands shake, like mine, and as he drinks, rogue drops of water spill down his chin and drip onto the bar. I’m glad I’m not the only one who was spooked by what just happened.

“Actually, I’m going to go get some air.” I fan my face as a boiling blast of nervous heat overcomes me. “If that’s okay?”

Crow nods. “Sure thing, love. Your beer will be here when you get back.”

Irrational tears well up in my eyes as the numbness in my chest fades. I will not cry here. I will not cry in front of all these people. I whirl around on my heel and march for the door. I grip the metal handle in the palm of my hand and pull the door open. A gust of cold air slams into me, drying my tears before they have the chance to fall. I close my eyes and inhale. The air feels like xylitol into my lungs, fresh and cold. I like to think I have grown strong through everything I’ve suffered through so far, but I haven't. I’ve grown so used to relaxing around the lake house that I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be in a violent situation. It’s absolutely terrifying.

I hate that I’m so weak. Jai was able to handle his situation and Joel didn’t flinch as a loaded shotgun was pressed to his head—even Huss and Ted were able to stand strong. I saw the way they looked at me when it was happening—Joel, Huss, Ted, and Jai. Their concern was plain on their faces whenever their eyes met mine. They felt sorry for me...because I’m a girl. Because I’m not strong like them. It's not like it's unwarranted. I mean, I barely know how to use a gun and I sure as hell can’t fight off someone bigger and heavier than me. I don’t even know why I’m thinking this. I guess...I just wish I could be more like them. I wouldn’t be left behind to wait in the dark while they get shit done if I was more like them. I’ve said it before, when do I become not worth the trouble? When do I become the baggage they don’t want to carry anymore?

“Hey.”

"Oh!" I gasp, startling foreward.

Jai catches me, pressing the palm of his hand against my tummy as my thighs touch the wooden railing that sections off the five stair drop to the ground. With a firm squeeze, he pulls me back against his body where it's safe.

Where it's warm.

I was so consumed by my own pathetic thoughts I didn’t realize I had walked onto the porch. I didn't hear Jai sneak up behind me either.

I fall back against him, absorbing all of the warmth his body exudes. Wrapping his arms around my waist, he holds me tightly and lowers his head to my shoulder. I sigh as he plants a kiss on the nape of my neck. And another.

And another.

Each press of his lips sends a delightful shiver down my spine and branches out, following each vein to the tip of every limb.

“Are you all right?” He asks, his lips delicately brushing my skin.

“Yes.” I say, cringing at my lie. “It’s a little hot in there, that’s all.”

Jai gives me a little squeeze. He doesn’t believe me, but at least he doesn’t make me tell him the truth. Being pathetic in my own head is one thing. Saying it out loud is another thing entirely.

“Can we go home?” He whispers, gifting me with another kiss.

Home.

It sounds so nice. I’ve never really had a home—or at least I haven’t had a home that feels like the lake house does.

The lake house is our home for one more night, at least.

A heavy cloud lingers over me, dispersing it's sadness onto me with a torrential downpour. I’m not ready for this to be finished. I’m not ready to lose my only home.

I nod. “Let’s go.”

***

“Joel’s finished?” Ted asks as he crosses the parking lot with Huss in tow.

Rocks crunch and grind together underneath their boots, taking over the sounds of nature.

“No.” Jai states, lifting the car keys chest high.

With a click of the button, the car’s indicators flash and the doors click.

“He can walk back.”

Ted and Huss march behind Jai who stormed inside to retrieve them in case things take a turn for the worst...again. Even though they’re here on Joel’s invite, Jai feels responsible for them. We’ve already established that both Huss and Ted are grown men who are capable of making their own decisions, but Jai doesn’t see it like that. He wants to look after them and make sure they're safe. He can’t bear to shoulder a heavier conscience so he carries all of the responsibility and refuses to share it.

Typical Jai.

“Maybe we should wait a little while longer for Joel...I don’t think he should walk alone.” I say as the men come to a stop in front of me.

“No.” Jai gives me a dark look as he reaches around me and opens the passenger door to the front seat. “Get in.”

I scowl at him, keeping my feet planted where I stand.

“She has a point.” Ted interjects. “Walking back isn’t safe for him.”

“Need I remind you he brought us here on our last night under false pretenses? We had guns pointed in our faces. We had threats made against us—insults hurled at us and you want to wait for him because you’re concerned for his safety?” Jai shakes his head. “I’m tired, I’m angry and I want to go home. Now, you can either come with me or accompany Joel’s ungrateful ass on the walk home.”

I open my mouth and Jai lifts a finger to silence me. His black eyes terrifying through their aggressive slits. “You don’t get a choice. You’re coming with me regardless.”

Sighing, I climb into the car. Leaving Joel to walk on his own isn’t a good idea and I know it’s one Jai will regret for the rest of his life if something happens. He knows it. We all know it. Sadly, he hasn't left it up for discussion. Jai has made his choice and once he makes his choice, there’s nothing anyone can do.

“Well, I sure as shit ain’t walking.” Huss announces, limping toward the back door. “Dragging my ass out here and for what? Screw him.”

Ted steps closer to Jai. Shadows settle in the hollows of his face, his lips turning down as he angles his head to the side. “Jai...give him another ten minutes. Ten. That’s all.”

Jai pushes my door and it slams shut. Thankfully, Huss still has his open so I can hear every word. Not that it matters. As soon as I strain my ears to listen, Huss engages me in conversation.

“These brothers...” Huss groans over the click of his seat belt. “They have a death wish.”

I twist in my seat, glancing over its shoulder. “And yet you’re still here. Why is that?”

He hesitates—not obviously—but I see the slight twitch of his bottom lip and the words that lodge themselves in his throat for the briefest second. “Because I’ve got nothing better to do.”

My brows furrow. Nothing better to do? Risking your life is better than having nothing else to do? At least he has a choice. I, on the other hand, don’t. This is my life at the moment. I can’t opt out, despite how desperately I wish I could sometimes.

Huss clears his throat as I straighten in my seat.

“How fortunate for you.” I mutter, folding my arms tightly across my chest.

He simpers. "Where are you going to be tomorrow night? Locked up in that big old house by yourself?"

"If Jai has it his way, yes."

I turn my attention out the window as Ted drags his hands down his face. “All right. I knew, okay?”

His voice is muffled, but I hear it.

Uh-oh.

I shift forward, leaning closer to the glass, desperate to clarify what I just heard. Ted knew? Ted knew about tonight? How could he not tell us?

Jai inches closer, his hands squeezed into fists at his side. “What’d you say?”

Ted lowers his head, his proud shoulders slumping forward. “I knew about tonight. I knew he was going to come here and recruit Joker’s men for the job tomorrow.”

Jai whips around, his large frame tense and tight, and takes three aggressive steps before turning and storming right back to Ted.

“You knew? You knew and you didn’t tell me?” Jai demands, his voice well above the acceptable level for this kind of conversation this time of night.

“I’m sorry, man. He told me not to tell you. He knew you wouldn’t be down for it.”

“We could have been killed!”

“But we weren’t.”

My forehead presses against the glass.

“That remains to be seen. Do you forget who these people are?”

“I know who they are.”

“Obviously you have no fucking clue.”

“Joel knows what he’s doing. We use the bikers as a distraction and then we go in and get the girl.”

Jai shakes his head. “You should have told me.”

He turns his back.

“Jai. C’mon, man. Don’t do this.” Ted curves his hands around his mouth to help project his voice as Jai rounds the front of the car.

“Jai! It’s a two hour walk.”

Jai snatches his door open, drops himself into the car, and slams the door shut. Huss and I remain silent, not daring to add to the hurricane of anger swirling around him. Without a word, he shoves the key into the ignition and turns the car on. Swallowing my panic, I reach for my seat belt and quickly pull it around me as he reverses. It clicks into place as Jai slams the car into drive and drops his foot against the accelerator. The tires spin the gravel, the sound loud and hoarse even from inside the car. Instinctively, my hands fly to my seat and I clench it as we zoom through the parking lot and out onto the road, leaving Joel and Ted behind.

Firsts

Jai

The garage door rolls to a close behind us. I twist the key in the ignition, shutting down the car, and drop my head against the steering wheel with a heavy sigh. I feel like shit—I feel worse than shit. I’ve gone to extreme lengths to save Joel. I’ve built my adult life around him…only to abandon him. Was it foolish of me to believe he’d be the same person I grew up with? Surely I had to know things would be different…

Emily and Huss simultaneously unclip their seat belts, but Emily stays put as Huss opens his door and slams it shut behind him, leaving Emily and I alone.

Good.

I want to be with her. Alone.

I lift my head and watch as Huss accesses the house through the white door in the far left corner of the garage and disappears. I watched him on and off on the car ride home. He’ll never admit it, but he’s shaken up. The way he'd grind his teeth and swallow harshly...nervousness is hitting him hard. I'm nervous too. We're doing this thing tomorrow and we still don't know the fucking plan.

“It was never supposed to be this complicated.” I sigh, falling back against my seat.

I look at Emily and I can’t stand it. I can’t stand the glow of sympathy in her eyes, mixed with harsh judgement and something else—something intense.

“Do you think I’ve made a mistake?”

“Making them walk?”

I nod.

“No.” She utters, avoiding my eyes.

She’s lying, but I’m thankful for it. I don’t think I can stomach her disappointment on top of my own.

“I think your decision was justified.”

Justified? Hardly. I shift my hands to the base of the steering wheel and pick at a swallow crack in the leather.

“If you were me...would you have left them?”

Emily lifts her eyes to mine. “No.”

“Why?”

“Because I wouldn’t be able to handle the guilt if something happened to them.”

I close my eyes. If something happens to them...what have I done? No. I will not guilt myself into going back for them. Yes, the possibility of something happening to them is higher than I’d like...but they left me with no choice.

“I can’t go back for them.” I slam my palms against the steering wheel. “They need to know who’s in charge here. I run the goddamn show—not Ted, not Joel—me.”

She reaches out with her slender hand and glides her palm up my bicep. “I know.”

The look of terror on her face when Joker had his gun in Joel's face plays in my head over and over. I couldn’t defend her or protect her. I was fucking useless and I never want to be in that position again. I need her too much.

“All of those bikers...all of those guns...I couldn’t do anything. If only I had known, I would have left you here.”

“But you didn’t know and we’re home safe and sound so don’t dwell on it, Jai. You’ll only make yourself sick.”

Our eyes lock and a million and one emotions vibrate through me. Tomorrow is the end in one way or another. Either I make it back alive, freeing me to spend the rest of my life trying to woo Kitten into loving me, or I won’t make it back at all. The thought of her on her own, scraping by to make ends meet, or snatched from her bed by Skull...I can't. Panic swirls, growing in mass by the second. What about the shit the old man said about her? What if he can “feel” her future like he claims? If she’s in unbearable pain and Joel is somehow involved...maybe Monique and I die, leaving Joel and Kitten to keep each other company.

Sharp points of jealousy stab my stomach and fuel my panic.

I shut my eyes and focus on the touch of her palm on my bicep. For now, it’s enough to hold off the impending panic attack.

“I had that dream again last night.” I mutter, changing the subject, doing anything I can to stop torturing myself with possibilities of our stark future.

“The one where I wear the red dress?”

“Mm.” I nod, smiling slightly. “You look amazing in that red dress. It’s a wonder we even make it to dinner.”

She laughs as I open my eyes and it’s a beautiful sound—girly and sweet. “I’ve been meaning to ask you about that. In your dream you said I fall madly in love with you after dinner.”

I nod.

“When do you fall madly in love with me? During dessert?”

“That’s funny.”

I chuckle, then pause. How doesn’t she know? After everything we’ve been through, after everything we’ve done, and everything I’ve said, how she hasn’t put two and two together. I open my mouth, then shut it. Rejection isn’t something I think I can handle with her. For the briefest moment, disappointment flashes in her eyes and shatters my fear of being rejected. What have I got to lose? If I’m going to die tomorrow, then I want to die knowing that Emily is aware she’s loved by another human being.

“I’ve already fallen in love with you, Kitten.”

A bright pink blush flares up her throat and pools in her cheeks. Her hand shakes as she reaches up to push a thin lock of hair off her forehead, but even with her visible nervousness, her shoulders lift in relief as she straightens her spine. It all makes sense. The distance she’s kept—her strange attitude. I conjured up a million reasons to explain her behavior, how’d I forgo the simplest one? I tortured myself with incredulous scenarios and theories, working myself up for no reason when the answer was so obvious.

She loves me too.

“O-Oh..." She stutters. "I...I...wasn’t expecting—”

“And forget what I said about you falling in love with me after dinner. You’ve already fallen in love with me too.” I state.

Just like earlier, the churn of her stomach is visible as a bout of nausea crosses her countenance.

“How do you know you love me?” She asks, sheepishly.

Her large, doe eyes flick to mine. There’s a sad droop to her eyebrows at the end of a concerned curve. What is she so afraid of?

“How do I know?”

“Yeah.” She glances at her hands and threads her fingers together. “How do you know for sure?”

I exhale and flick off the headlights, drowning us in darkness—not complete darkness. I can still see the outline of her face, the slope of her neck and the curve of her breasts. I notice the change in her breathing in the darkness. It’s calm and relaxed—like there’s no more pressure to look me in the eyes when she speaks.

“I haven’t really thought about it.” I say, scratching my head—which reminds me I need a damn haircut. “I guess, in summary, the thought of not being with you for even a second makes me feel tight in the chest.”

Emily whips her head in my direction. “Does it?”

“Oh, yeah.”

Through the darkness, she reaches out and slips her warm hand into mine. It’s damp, but it no longer trembles and it feels so tiny enclosed in my giant paw.

I like this. Being able to tell her everything I’ve been thinking—everything I’ve been feeling. Why stop there?

“I find myself stealing glimpses at you all day. You’re so fucking cute.”

With her free hand, Emily covers her mouth and I can only imagine the fierce blush in her cheeks at this very second.

“Oh my God. Stop. You do not!”

If only she knew just how many times I catch myself watching her—admiring her. Perhaps then she wouldn’t ask me if I’m sure about loving her.

“I do.”

“What if I’m picking my nose?” She asks, shock and disgust dominating her tone as he cringes.

“I’m sure you’d find a cute way to do it.”

Emily’s beautiful, uncontrolled laughter fills the car and I add it to my list of things that make me certain that I love her.

I shift in my seat. “I know I love you because the thought of being with anyone else—or you being with anyone else—just...it drives me fucking insane.” I swallow the bitterness in my throat. “All of those things...they’ve gotta count for something.”

A thick silence falls and all I can think about is begging her to tell me she loves me. I want to hear it more than anything—more than I want to live. I need to know that the last few years of my life—the life I’ve dedicated to finding a brother who doesn’t give a shit—hasn’t been a total waste.

“I feel the same, but...” She sighs, dropping her head back against her headrest. “I’ve never...God. I’m so pathetic.”

I release her hand and she pulls it back to shield her face.

“You’re definitely not pathetic, Kitten.”

She snorts, dropping her hands against her thighs with a slap. “Will you ever stop calling me that?”

“I don’t think so.” I laugh. “No.”

I’ve never been a pet name kind of guy. To be honest, the thought of them make me cringe, but she was too fun not to tease when I met her and it’s stuck.

She is Kitten.

She hates it, but that doesn’t matter.

“I’ve never said the words before.” She admits and the sadness in her voice hits me hard.

I shift in my seat again, angling my body towards her. “Never?”

“I grew up without parents and siblings. I’ve avoided any serious relationships and have never had the means to own a pet so no...never.”

Ah, so she has first time jitters. Nothing a little booze can’t fix. Turning in my seat, I reach behind it, stuffing in my hand into the pocket attached to the back. I remember seeing Ted stash a bottle of Vodka in there before we left. There’s nothing like a bottle of Russian water to loosen the tongue. I push deeper and my fingers graze the side of a cool bottle. Smiling, I wrap my fingers around the neck and pull it free.

“What are we going to do with that?”

I smile. Isn’t it obvious?

“We’re going to drink your first time jitters away.”

Emily quirks an eyebrow in the most mischievous of ways, making my blood sing. Fuck she’s beautiful.

“You know, this is all starting to sound a little like tenth grade.”

I arch a brow, matching hers. “Please tell me you did not drink Vodka and fuck in a car when you were in high school.”

Cringing, she nods as she pushes herself out of her chair and forces herself through the space between the front seats. With a squeeze and a huff, she’s drops onto the back seat.

“In the back of a truck with senior footballer Tommy Field and the smallest bottle of Vodka I’ve ever seen.”

Exhaling, she rests her feet on the back of the passenger seat.

“What, there weren’t any girls his age?”

She snickers, patting the space next to her. “Apparently not.”

Fucking sleaze. Then again, I can’t talk. If we went to the same school I’d have followed her around relentlessly. I would have had her and not in the back of a fucking truck.

Clenching the bottle in my hand, I join her on the back seat. We share the booze without talking, both of us reveling in the silence. Around us, the air grows warm and humid, coaxing Emily to ditch her jacket while I ditch my sweater. Admittedly, I’d be more relaxed if I knew the answer to the question that’s burning at the back of my mind. Tommy Field. Who was he to her? I can imagine what he looked like so vividly in my head. Broad shoulders, black slicked hair, dark eyes and a smug look to match. I hate him and I don’t even know the piece of shit.

I clear my throat. “You and Tommy...was he your first?”

She rakes her perfect, white teeth over her bottom lips, biting back an awkward smile.

“Yeah. He was.”

Yep. I hate the shit out of him. Has a time machine been invented yet? If so, how much will it cost me to go back in time and beat the shit out of this guy?

I take the bottle from her hands and fill my mouth with it. My head spins with the effects of the alcohol and I grit my teeth as I swallow. I hold the bottle in front of my face. How have we almost finished it? How long have we been sitting here?

She extends her hand and I return the bottle.

“How’d that pan out afterwards?” I ask.

“Afterwards?” She downs a mouthful and hisses with a shudder. “Afterwards I didn’t exist and Mr. Quarterback went back to his on again off again high school sweetheart.”

“Fucking asshole.”

It’s official. I’m going back in time to shove an unlubricated football up his dick hole.

She shrugs. “It is what it is. What about you? Where was your first time and what was her name?”

I drop my head against the seat. How long ago was it? Too long to remember the girl’s last name.

“Her name was Melanie Something and it was on a beach.”

Emily turns in her seat, stretching her long legs across mine. Unable to resist, I rest my hand on her thigh.

“A beach? How romantic.”

I roll my eyes. “Sex on a beach is overrated. It was fucking horrible and anything but romantic.”

“How so?”

There is nothing, and I mean nothing, romantic about chaffing. The whole ordeal was a mess—and not to mention it lasted less than six minutes. Teenage nerves ruin lives.

“Don’t ask.”

I peer at Emily. Her eyes are wide and her face is lit up by both amusement and excitement.

“Were you drinking?” She asks, handing me the booze.

“No.” I take a sip. “I’m pretty sure every teenage boy wants to remember when they first have sex and exactly what it felt like the next morning.”

Emily shifts closer to me, scooting forward until her ass touches the side of my thigh. “Did you enjoy it?”

I blink at her.

“I had sex...with a girl...for the first time in my life. Of course I enjoyed it.” I clench the bottle in my hand. “Was Tommy—a douche baggy name, by the way—was he good? Did you enjoy it?”

With a single laugh, she shakes her head. “For months I worked the whole thing up in my head before he asked me out on a date. It was going to be romantic and nice—and it was going to feel better than it did when I touched myself.”

“Was it?”

She slaps her hand over her face. “Oh, God, no. It was horrible. At least your six minutes was still double Tommy’s time—not to mention it felt like I was being punched in the cervix with a cucumber.”

I laugh—we laugh—and the sound mixes so perfectly, her light tones meshing with my deep.

“No one has made me feel as good as you make me feel.” She murmurs, raking her teeth over her bottom lip as the last giggle bubbles up her throat.

My heart ceases to beat as she leans in. All it takes is a gentle brush of her lips against mine and lungs refuse to function properly.

She plants a kiss on my lower lip. “I love the way you make me feel.”

“Almost.” I whisper, kissing her lip in return. “Say the other line.”

Her lips curl into a mischievous grin. I can’t take my eyes off them until she lowers her face, disappearing under my jaw line, and kisses my neck in the most delicious of ways. I tilt my head offering her more skin as she presses her warm, gentle lips in a trail all the way up to the lobe of my ear.

“I want you to force it out of me.” She whispers, finishing with another kiss.

I groan, tempted to rip open the fabric that hides her body from me and come on every pore, hair follicle and freckle on her body.

“Not in the car, Kitten.” I tell her, gripping her shoulders and pushing her back. “You’re too good for the backseat of a car.”

My stare drops to her chest. The rise and fall of her breasts mesmerizes me—hypnotizing me to take back what I said. She can sit on me. She can ride me...fuck me into oblivion. This seat makes it so easy to do...makes it so easy to just...fucking...do it.

Emily moistens her top lip.

“Then take me to bed.”

Smooth

Jai

I run the palm of my hand between her breasts, down her tummy, and snake it between her thighs, forcing all the soap and water to wash down to the floor. She soaps my chest, running her fingers along every rise and depression. It feels nice to appreciate her like this after she let me into her body. We never got to take the time to appreciate each other in the tunnels. We fucked quickly, usually clothed, and that was the end of it. Here, I see all of her. From the scar on her left ankle to the spattering of light freckles on her cheeks. She is perfection.

My perfection.

Today is a bitter pill to swallow. Now that it’s here, I realize I never got to enjoy her enough. I haven’t spoiled her...I haven’t taken her places she’s never been...and it’s all about to come to an end. Why couldn’t I have found her before this? Why couldn’t I have found her before Tommy field—before all of the other useless men before me?

I want her. I want her now, back then and in the future.

Mine. All mine.

“I want to come with you.” She mutters, her shoulders relaxing from the tense hold she’s had them in this whole time.

I stop caressing the skin around her belly button and flick my stare to hers. Her fierce irises burn with desperation. They plead with me, beg me to adhere to her wishes. There’s no way she’s coming to Skull’s compound—no fucking way—and I know that’s exactly what she’s asking.

“Are you out of your mind? I’m not taking you there.”

Emily drops her hands from my chest and smooths them over her head, forcing her hair into place.

“Please don’t leave me here. I can’t stand it.” She steps closer. “I want to be there—where you are.”

“You’re safer here.” I turn my back to her and step into the hot stream of water, ending the conversation.

Or at least I intended it to end the conversation. Naturally, Emily refuses to accept my final word. A stubborn little thing, as I’ve always said. She swings around my body, stopping in front of me with her arms crossed tightly under her breasts. I remember when I slid my cock between them. God...that was sexy. She ducks low for a moment, forcing my eyes from her lovely breasts to her face.

“I feel safer with you, Jai.” Her eyes glisten. “Please. Don’t make me wait in the dark by myself. Not again.”

I close my eyes and sink into the stream, letting it blast into my hair and roll down my face. What’s the worst that could happen? Huss will be in the car with her and he knows the times and signals to flee if anything goes wrong. He could take her with him...if she’s already in the car he can’t pussy out and abandon her here all alone.

I lean away from the jets and brush my hands over my face, clearing any excess water.

“Fine.” I say, opening my eyes. “You can come with us, but you stay in the car and you do what Huss tells you. If—”

“Thank you! Thank you!” She bounces toward me.

“Listen.” I grip her shoulders, preventing her from wrapping her excited little arms around my waist. “If I don’t make it back you leave. All right? You don’t get to come looking for me. You don’t get to go on a rampage.”

Her excitement dulls and she pulls her arms back into her chest, as if they work as extra protection for her heart. “I can’t just leave if you don’t come back.”

Her voice cracks and it’s the exact emotion I want her to avoid going into this thing tomorrow night. I might die. I might not make it back to her. The thought fucking terrifies me, but I can’t act on it. I can’t let it consume me. I need to have a clear head for my brother—for Ted and Huss.

For her.

“If you don’t promise me, Kitten. You’re not coming.”

Emily swallows hard, weighing the decision in her mind. I get it. It’s a hard decision. If shit goes south I’m telling her to forget me and move on. It’s hard to grasp when you’ve just told someone you love them.

“I promise.” Her chin falls slightly. “I promise I will leave the second Huss wants to.”

I grab her and pull her into me. Having her there will ease me to a degree. Any extra seconds I get to spend with her are a bonus.

I just pray I won’t end up regretting it.

***

“Wakey, wakey!”

Boom. The bedroom door is kicked open and it smashes against the wall with a crash.

“Are you two up?” Joel asks, his voice filled with an annoying amount of energy.

Squinting, I force my eyes open and a blurry object saunters toward me, carrying something. I rub at my eyes and angle my body to look at the clock. Eight a.m.? Why the fuck is Joel waking us at eight a.m.? What time did he get in? I may have said a little prayer for his safety before bed last night...now I wish I didn’t. Why the hell is he so chipper? I all but left him for dead.

Groaning, Emily bunches the blanket around her chest and pushes herself into a seated position. She rests her forehead against the palm of her hand.

“Huss tells me you two had a lot of fun last night.”

I grunt at him, holding the blanket against my hips. I definitely don’t want Joel to see me naked. Lifting his foot, he kicks the alarm clock off the bedside table and sits his tray down. I rub at my eyes again, pushing all of the blurriness away, and glance at the tray. The multicolored juices...the eggs and vegetables...to be honest it all looks like shit.

“I made freshly squeezed juice and threw together a nutritious omelet for you to share.”

“Ugh.” Emily falls back against the bed and covers her face with a spare pillow. “Pass.”

Joel shrugs and looks at me with a smile. “More for you.”

Sitting up, I reach for a glass of whatever the hell it is and pluck it off the tray. “Didn’t poison it, did you?”

Joel laughs as he runs his hands down the front of his black tee. “I’m not mad at you for last night, baby brother. I kept something from you and you ditched me. Now we’re even.”

That easy, huh? No apology? No fucking explanation? He’s not getting away with it. No way in hell. I sip at the juice and taste a variety of fruits and vegetables on the tip of my tongue. My taste buds revel in it, grateful to taste something fresh and smooth—something that wouldn’t be able power a vehicle on its fumes alone.

I shake my head. “We’re not even. We could have been killed.”

“But we weren’t.”

Sitting the drink down, I glare at him. “That’s beside the point. You lied to us. You risked our lives for your own gain.”

“And came out better because of it.” He rakes his hands over his face. “I did what I had to do to ensure you and Ted and Huss will survive tonight. I have made our chances in succeeding and surviving higher than what they were.”

I have made…

Have…

No. My stomach sinks like a stone into my intestines. Please tell me he didn’t go through with it.

“You didn’t.”

He nods, unapologetically. “The Twisted Sons will help us storm Skull’s compound tonight.”

I go to jump out of bed, then stop, remembering I’m butt naked underneath the sheet. “Are you fucking insane?”

“Apparently.” Joel says as he turns away from me and storms over to the door.

“They’ll betray you the second they get the chance.” I snap, grabbing my pillow and tossing it across the room. “Fuck! How can you not know that?”

Anger sets fire inside me and rages like an inferno. Emily’s soft hand wraps around my bicep and she snuggles closer to me, planting soft kisses on my shoulder blade.

Joel grips the handle on the door and steps out into the hallway.

With a confident look over his shoulder he says: “We’ll be gone before they even realize it. Italy. All of us.”

Oh, how fucking cute! How fucking naïve! He wants to jump on a plane and forget all about it? Can’t he see that if it was that simple I’d have done it already?

“These aren’t the kind of people who stop chasing you because you flew over an ocean, Joel.”

“Don’t you worry, little brother.” He tells me with a laugh. “I got it covered. All you have to do is rest and fuel yourself for tonight. If it all goes well, we’ll be on a plane to Italy by tomorrow morning.” He clicks his fingers and shuts the door, leaving me staring at the white wood.

I cannot stand that guy.

“I know it’s risky, Jai, but look on the bright side.” Emily mutters, drawing small circles on my back. “If it increases the chances of having you returned to me in one piece then I’m all for it.”

I exhale, focusing on the soft press of her lips against my shoulder and the feather light brush of her fingertips along my thigh. Maybe she’s right—maybe Joel is right.

My cock twitches, rising from its slumber, as her fingers dance toward my inner thigh. I lie back against my pillows and Emily shifts forward, pushing herself onto her knees and hooking a leg over my thighs to straddle my hips. Eagerly, the head of my penis presses into her flesh, begging her to let it inside her body.

“Do you want me?” She asks, running her palms over my chest and down my arms.

“I always want you.”

“Then you have to let Joel do whatever he can to get you back to me—even if it means teaming up with bad people to fight a common enemy.” She lowers her head to my chest, pressing her ear against my heart. “I know I shouldn’t depend on you so much...but I’ll disintegrate without you.”

I wrap my arm around her shoulders, the other around her head. I hate doing this to her—making her live in fear of losing the only person she’s let into heart, but I’ve got no choice. I am a man of my word...a man who’d do anything to help his family. As much as I don’t agree with Joel, I have to help him. I owe him. He dedicated those years of his life to raising Jessica and I on his own. I’ve got to give him something back.

“I love you.” I whisper into her hair.

Emily tilts her face up to mine. For a moment, we’re stuck in each other’s gazes, a meaningful silence holding us together.

Then she kisses me.

Hard.

So hard she sucks the air from my lungs and replaces it with the unrelenting urge to fuck. I crush her against me and she shifts her hips, letting my cock slide between us. Emily grinds her hips into me, sliding her perfect pussy along the underside of my shaft, milking me for all the precum I have. Despite all of this—despite the beat of her heart against mine, the warmth of her body, and the slick body fluids between us—I can’t shake the bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I can’t.

Bang

Emily

I swipe at a rogue tear as it spills over the rim of my eyes and rolls down my cheek. On the other side of the house, out on the back porch, the men talk tactics, changing their plan around to make room for Joker’s gang.

“We can go in through the back while Joker and his men take the front.” I hear Joel announce, followed by Jai’s agreement.

The day went fast—too fast for me to remember what I did. Jai and I spent a good portion of the day in bed, enjoying each other’s company, but we couldn’t be under the sheets forever. No matter how hard I tried to keep us there. Eventually, we had to join the rest of the men downstairs. I couldn’t stand the sight of the kitchen and sitting room when I saw it—I still can’t—which is why I’m sitting on the front porch, sulking into my stupid fruit and vegetable juice Joel keeps making for me. Guns, all different kinds of guns, grenades, and knives litter the house, drilling the fact this is real into my chest. This is my life. I’m caught up in some crazy nightmare, not a dream. Being at the lake house has clouded my view on this situation—being with Jai has watered down my fear.

Gangs.

Crime lords.

Psychopaths.

Murderers.

Am I even going to make it out of this alive? Are any of us? We’re four people against armies. The odds seem so slim.

The thunderous sound of motorcycles echo through the trees that surround our lake house, sending thick tendrils of dread burrowing through my chest.

The Twisted Sons are here.

Behind me, heavy boots thump through the house, getting closer and closer, until Huss, Ted, Joel, and Jai are all standing on the porch behind me. I dump my glass of juice in the wilting bush beside the step and jump to my feet as shiny hunks of metal and plastic spill out of the gap in the trees and filter onto our lawn. At least fifty of them, followed by eight vehicles that range in size, but are all black and bear the same raging bull logo.

I grab the hem of my black, long sleeved shirt and pull it lower around my plain belt buckle. My knees tremble as the men before us line their bikes up neatly and shut off their engines. They look so scary from here...all of their black fabric, leather and exposed ink. I rake them with my eyes and in the second row, third from the left, I see a hand wave at me. Pops, a.k.a. Crow. The fucker who wouldn’t help when Joker had his gun pressed to Joel’s head. I nod at him and quickly divert my eyes to the man on the most expensive looking motorcycle. He relaxes on his handle bars and tilts his head at us. He has a black bandana tied around his face with the bottom half of a skull printed on it and covering his eyes is a pair of reflective sunglasses.

Joker.

He’s tall, broad shouldered, inked up, and fucking terrifying.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Ted whispers to Joel.

I glance over my shoulder at Joel who swallows hard. “Well...it’s too late now, isn’t it?”

Jai growls, his jaw clenching tightly, as Joel steps off the porch and onto the first step, shaking it underneath my feet.

“Afternoon.” He greets them with faux cheerfulness. “What will it be...shotguns or rifles?”

***

My nerves are fried. My heart is choking. Sickness churns in my stomach over and over, causing a clammy sweat to bloom all over my body. It’s all happening. It’s moving too fast.

“Two miles out.” Huss announces, allowing the car to roll to a stop.

It’s dark, so dark I can’t see what’s outside my window and the only light inside the car is provided by the accessory lights in front of the driver. I clench Jai’s hand, thankful he took his glove off for me to feel his skin. The whole trip he’s soothed me by kissing my face and caressing my hand, but it’s not enough. His comfort falls on numb skin. A bright light twenty yards to our left flickers and disappears and Joel turns in his seat.

“Joker and his men are ready.” He states, looking to Jai.

“All right.” Jai reaches for his small torch at the back of his belt. With a click, it comes free, and stretches down by his black boots for the map. I swallow as he stuffs the mini torch under his shirt and uses the fabric to block the harsh light as he turns it on. The map he lights up is covered in ticks and crosses—markings that confuse the hell out of me, but offer a lot of insight into the plan for them.

“In twenty seconds we’ll have exactly seven minutes before we have to set off on foot to Skull’s compound. To recap, it will take us precisely thirty minutes to make it to the back gate from here at a casual pace, but we need to make it in thirteen so we’ll have to run.”

Jai squeezes my hand. I’m thankful he didn’t let it go as he re-briefed them with his map.

“We don’t know these woods.” Ted points out, resting too casually on the barrel of his rifle. “Can we make it in thirteen? What if there’s a lake or a gorge we don’t see?”

Joel shakes his head. “We have to make it in thirteen minutes—we don’t have a choice—and there aren’t any lakes or gorges. That I know for a fact.”

Ted shakes his head. He’s had issues from the moment Joker and Joel started changing up the plan. “So we’re just going to run blindly through the damn woods?”

Reaching down, Joel retrieves his cap from the floor and slips it onto his head. “You have a better idea?” He asks.

Shifting on his seat, Ted pulls a hunk of fabric from the pocket on the side of his thigh. “Yes. Your first plan. It worked.”

Ted hands Jai his gun and Jai holds it as Ted unrolls the bundled fabric and pulls it on over his head. A balaclava. It’s a clever idea—especially when they’re going to be running through the woods. He’s going to receive a lot less cuts to the face because of it.

“Seven minutes has started.” Jai cuts in, hitting a button on the cool new watch Joel gave him as a ‘sorry’ for last night.

No one knows where he got it.

Jai hands Ted back his gun and turns to me. “Open the door.”

Doing as I’m told, I open the door. Jai hits the light in the center of the roof, preventing it from lighting up the woods. Cold air blasts the exposed skin on my hands and face, forcing me to retreat into my clothes.

“Our numbers have grown. It doesn’t work anymore. How many times do I have to explain that to you? Sending Joker and his men in through the front instead of us ensures you get to go home to your mama tonight.”

Jai nudges my thigh and flicks his head outside. Reluctantly, I slip from the car, clenching my chattering bones to prevent them from splintering. Sticks and leaves crunch under Jai’s heavy boots as he exits the car. After he closes the door, he rests his heavy gun against the back wheel and leans against the car.

“Come here.”

I shuffle toward him and he takes me in his arms when I’m close enough to grab. I press the side of my face into his chest to hear his heart. It beats faster than I expected it to.

Being in love sucks.

“I’ll be back in a little under two hours, okay? No more, no less.”

“Two hours.” I repeat, inhaling. “Only two hours.”

I exhale. I can do that.

“Promise me you’ll be here waiting for me when I get back.” Jai says, kissing my head.

I roll my eyes. “Where am I going to go?”

He laughs, his whole body vibrating against mine, as he smooths the palm of his hand down my hair.

“If this goes well, we’ll be in Italy before you know it.”

“You’d really take me to Italy?”

“I didn’t send Jess there by coincidence. You love Italy and I want to live there with you.”

“I love you more than I love Italy.’ I mutter, heat pooling in my cheeks. “I don’t care where we are as long as I have you.”

Our gazes lock together, the moment as beautiful and as special as any time we’ve locked our bodies. Cupping my face, he brushes his thumb along my jaw and my tummy flutters.

“I’m glad I broke your tablet.” He murmurs, his lips twitching at the corner.

I smile, despite the somber feel of the atmosphere. “You’re glad?”

He nods, his lip twitch turning into a small, bashful smile. “Yeah. It might have been the worst thing to happen to you, but it was the best thing to happen to me. I’d have died without you. We both know it.”

I push onto the tips of my toes, closing the distance between our lips, sealing it with a kiss. Jai grabs my face, holding me against him. If I had the ability to freeze time only once in my entire life I would choose this moment and I would hold it for as long as I could because in this exact moment there is no greater happiness...no greater loss. To feel your heart swell and deflate at the same time is a phenomenon I can’t explain. To feel your heart bleed at the same time it proudly sings is the saddest, most painful experience I’ve ever had.

I don’t want to lose him.

Not when I’ve finally learned how to let someone in—someone who genuinely cares about me.

“Two hours.” I repeat, an attempt at convincing myself it’s a small time to wait. “That’s all.”

“How long, Jai?” Joel demands, throwing open his door and pulling us from our moment.

I pull out of Jai’s arms, giving him space to check his watch. “Three minutes and twelve seconds.”

“Shit. All right.” Joel glances into the car and then back to us. “One minute to finish your goodbye and then we’ll move into position.”

“That will put us a minute behind schedule.”

Joel nods a slow nod.

“I know.” He says before closing his door, leaving us alone again.

A minutes doesn’t seem like much, but right now, it makes all the difference. Sixty more seconds...sixty small eternities...sixty more chances to tell him just how much I love him.

All of my attention zeros in on the warmth of Jai’s hand as he slides his fingers around my wrist and tightens his grip. He tugs me closer.

“An extra minute.” He teases, wrapping his arms low on my hips. “Whatever shall we do with all of this extra time on our hands?”

I laugh, despite my depressed mood. Will that be the last time he makes me laugh? Jai cranes his head and nuzzles into the nape of my neck, planting a trail of warm, loving kisses along my flesh.

“I’ll come back.” He whispers against my skin.

My heart rolls at his tone. It’s dark and sad, despite his attempt to make it lighthearted. I’m not immune to the tones of the voice and I pick up on his worry immediately. How is he going to convince me when he can’t even convince himself? Despair rages in my chest and prickles at my tear ducts.

We waste the sixty seconds in silence.

Perfect.

Short-lived.

Silence.

***

Nerves attack my stomach and I anxiously chew the skin around my nails as I hug my knees against my chest.

“How long?” I ask, curling my toes in my shoes.

“We’ve been sitting her for 25 minutes.” Huss says, dropping back against his seat. “Which is five minutes since the last time you asked.”

“Sorry.” I mumble, threading my fingers together to save me from eating them to the bone.

I thought being out here would be easier, but it’s worse—so much worse. At least at the lake house I can eat or drink myself into a coma. Out here I’m forced to watch and wait. I’ve never been good at waiting.

“Will we hear anything?” I wonder aloud, squinting between the two front seats and into the woods.

I don’t know what I expect to see...the flashing of guns, the glow of an emergency flare. They’re two miles out, of course. I doubt I’ll see anything unless they set Skull’s compound on fire.

“Gunfire? Sure. Anything else? Unlikely.”

Huss exhales and rubs at his forehead. I survey him as he bounces his knee—a coping mechanism I haven’t noticed Huss do before. I’ve always seen Jai, Ted and Huss as strong, fearless men who are rarely rattled by anything, but Huss seems to be taking this harder than I expected. Lowering my knees, I lean forward, poking my head between the two front seats. Swallowing hard, Huss tugs impatiently at the collar of his hood.

“Are you okay?” I ask, concerned he’s on the verge of a panic attack.

Who the hell is going to drive if Huss is incapacitated? Not me—that’s for sure.

“I’m fine.” He snaps with a harsh whip of his head. “Will you stop with damn the questions?”

Frowning, I slide back, pressing my spine firmly against the middle seat. Confusion nips at me. Does he know something I don’t? Is there something I should be aware of that he’s not telling me? I open my mouth, but the sound of distant gunfire—a lot of it—chokes the words in my throat. I clench my fists and squeeze them against my mouth. Huss curses, slamming his fist against the steering wheel.

“What is it?” I whisper and it falls on deaf ears. “Huss?”

“Hm?”

“What is it?”

He slams his forehead into the steering wheel, making me jump. He does it repeatedly, cursing at himself. The hairs on the back of my neck stand tall and goosebumps rapidly make their way over the surface of my skin.

“I have a son.” He mutters, shaking his head. “I have a son.”

I frown.

“You have a son?” I repeat, shifting forward.

Sure, it’s a shock to the system, but what does it have to do with right now?

Huss nods. “He’s seven. Brandon. He’s smart...so damn smart. I don’t see him much, but he’s my whole world.”

“Why are you telling me this now?”

“Because I want you to understand the reasoning behind what I’ve done.”

My brows furrow as he turns his head in my direction.

“I’m confused. What have you done?”

The blue LED lights from the center console light up the side of his face—enough for me to see the desperation on his features—the sympathy in the sad curve of his lips.

“I’d do anything to protect him.”

I pull my legs up onto the seat. My heart pounds in my ear, thrumming unlike anything I’ve ever felt before.

“Huss...you’re starting to scare me.”

I jump as headlights flick on from my right, blinding me completely. I shield my face with my arm and desperately peek over, trying to figure out what the fuck is going on and who the hell has their headlights on us.

“Huss?” I call out, the balls of my eyes burning every time I open them. “Who is that?”

He doesn’t answer, making my stomach clench into a tight ball.

“Huss? What’s happening?”

“I’m sorry, Emily.” He growls, slamming his fists against the wheel. “It’s not my fault! They found me at Joker’s bar—cornered me in the bathroom. I didn’t have a choice they threatened to hurt my boy.”

The door to my left is yanked open and I ditch trying to cover my face. With a scream, I dive for the other door. I grab the handle as large, strong hands wrap around one of my ankles.

“No!” I shout, my lungs failing to function the way they should.

I kick my legs and thrash my hips, desperate to shake the person off. With a stroke of luck, my shoe hits something hard, the sound turning my stomach. A loud, angry growl zaps into my body as my legs are freed. Wasting no time, I pull the handle and shove the door. It flies open and blasts me with freezing wind. I throw myself out of the car, crying and sobbing hysterically. He set me up! He fucking set me up!! It’s no wonder he was so cool when Jai told him about me tagging along tonight. I run—I run faster than I’ve ever run—using the bright headlights to help me see.

“Emily!” Huss calls out, but I don’t stop.

Dry leaves and fallen sticks crunch underneath my shoes as I sprint. The ground is uneven and rogue twigs and leaves cut at my soft skin as I force myself through the woods. I don’t know where I’m going, but any direction is a good direction as long as it takes me far away from here. I sob as I run, my lungs failing to keep me going. I’m going to die.

Something slams into me from behind and I’m thrown to the ground and crushed underneath the weight of a full grown man.

“Get off me!” I scream, my vocal chords burning out and drilling my throat.

“Not fucking likely.” He barks out, grabbing a fistful of my hair.

The stranger I can’t see forces me to my feet and shoves me back toward the bright lights. I squeeze my eyes shut, unable to open them until I’m in the shadow of Huss’s car.

I open my eyes to see Huss leaning against the back of the car, sympathy painted on his face. How dare he?!

“How could you do this?” I cry, tears flooding from my eyes. “We trusted you!”

“Emily...I’m sorry.”

I shoot forward, straining my body with everything that I have. My lungs burn as I scream, my heart threatens to explode.

“He will kill you!” I scream until my lungs burn and my voice breaks. “He will kill you!”

With a final thrust and a twist of my shoulders, I slip free from my kidnappers grip. I stumble, but recoup quickly. Without thought, I turn and launch for Huss. I barely place my footing before a hard mass slams into the side of my head and darkness claims me.

Pinned

Jai

Shit.

My chest heaves as I press my back harder against the stone wall in the back courtyard. They have me pinned down, their powerful bullets chipping away at the already fragmented wall. Sweat is thick and heavy on my skin and my nerves rage war inside my body. I have to make it back to the car.

Dying is not an option.

I drag in an unsteady inhale and twist out from the wall, crouching as low as I can to the ground while keeping two hands on my gun. I pull the trigger once—twice—and the asshole behind the terracotta pot goes down in a spray of blood. I swing my gun against my chest and roll behind a bush. Joel is trapped in the lower right wing of the courtyard and Ted is...Ted is somewhere. I’m on my own, holding them back while Joker attacks from the front.

There isn’t supposed to be this many enemies. Joel promised fifty, maximum. There are at least a hundred here. Someone must have tipped Skull off. There’s no way this is a coincidence.

Fucking Joker. I knew teaming up with him was a bad idea.

Sucking in another inhale, I force myself out of cover and shoot the three goons perching the span of four windows on the middle floor. The tiles at my feet explode into powder as bullets smash them. Desperate not to get hit, I dive for the closest stone ball Skull has adorned his backyard with. Powder rains down on me and I close my eyes.

My heart thunders in my head, matching the tempo of my furious heart. I will not die. I cannot die. Not when Emily is waiting for me in a car two miles east of here. She’s depending on me to make it back to her.

And I will.

I throw myself out of cover once more, my gun cocked and pressed firmly into my shoulder. The gun kicks into me, vibrating my entire upper body and the length of my arm as I repeatedly squeeze the trigger. Even over the thunderous sound of my rifle, I hear my heart thrumming against my ear drums.

There’s too many front on, I’ll have to flank them. I pull back into cover, desperately dragging air in through my nose. The air fills my lungs and taints my tongue with the essence of metal and gunpowder and, no matter how hard I swallow, it doesn't go away. Bullets rain down on top of me, chipping away at the stone, getting closer and closer to following through and piercing my body. They don’t stop, leaving no pause for me to get up and fire back.

“Dammit!” I snap, my voice hoarse and harsh.

I’m trapped—pinned down with no options. Or at least I am for a minute or two. The crushing sound of a shotgun blasts through the air. Distinct shouting rumbles over the roar of gunfire and the spray of bullets against my rock let’s up. I wait, straining my ears for a sound—any sound—that indicates they’ve gone or are advancing on my position.

"Jai?" A voice booms, thick with panic.

Ted?

I peer out from behind my rock and squint through the dust and smoke. When it settles, I see Ted against the left flank of the house, a shotgun in his hand and four dead men littered around him. He stumbles and clenches his side as I push myself to my feet.

"Ted?" I shout, sprinting across the courtyard.

"Joel is inside—pinned down in the foyer. He needs covering fire from the left to make it to level three. That’s where they're keeping the girl. I tried to help, but—ah!”

I reach him and wrap my arms around his waist, helping him lower himself to the ground.

“Shut up.” I demand, glancing around us.

What the fuck can I use to stop the bleeding? My desperate eyes stop on the dead guy beside me. He’s missing half of his face and his shirt has small pieces of skull and brain on it, but it’ll have to do.

“God, no! I’d rather bleed out. Jai—”

“I said shut up.” I bark.

I’m not about to let Ted die. Not over this. I rip at the shirt of the dead man beside me. Surprisingly, it tears cleanly, allowing me to ball the fabric and stuff it against Ted’s side. He hisses and growls, his body quaking with pain.

"Hold it tightly. It needs pressure. I don't think the bullet has hit any important organs, but we need to get you out of here as soon as possible."

Groaning, Ted nods and I set up his shotgun on his lap.

“If someone comes play dead if you have to and wait for them to get close. I’ll help Joel get the girl and then we can get the hell out of here.”

Ted nods, his skin growing clammy and cold. He’s going to bleed out. Grabbing my rifle, I rake my fingers through my hair and push forward, entering the huge establishment through the back door. I don’t pay attention to the rooms I storm through, they all seem to blend together, filled with smoke and dust and riddled with the same amount of bullet holes. Eventually, I slip in to the foyer from a side door well off to the left side. Exactly where I need to be. Loud gunshots ring out from the guns of the two men in front of me. It’s so loud they don’t hear me coming. They point their guns toward the top of the stairs and shoot at the thick marble columns that support this thick, monstrous structure. Upon starting this shoot out, most of the men ran to the front where Joker was waiting, leaving us to clean up the dregs. Unfortunately for us, those dregs still outnumber us, making it a hell of a lot harder than I originally thought. I step out from behind a wall and inch closer to the brutes in front of me. In the back right pocket of the man on the left, I spot a hunting knife in its sheath.

I can grab it.

Adrenaline pounds through my veins. It’s now or never. I lift my gun and shoot the guy on the right. As he crumbles, I snatch the knife from its sheath and punch the other guy in the back of the head. They both crash to the floor. One dead, the other available to talk. Rolling him onto his back, I drop the majority of my weight on top of him.

“Where’s Skull?” I demand, pushing the knife against his throat.

The asshole blinks and settles his black, oil-like irises on mine. Recognition flares in his beady eyes and he smiles, his fat, bulbous cheeks lifting toward his eyes. “Him and the rest of them are on their way. You’re a dead man, Stone.”

“Jai?” Joel calls my name from the top of the stairs, but I don’t take my eyes off the toad underneath me.

“I’m all right.” I call back. “Get the girl.”

Under my knee—a knee that’s an ounce of pressure away from cracking this guy’s ribs—his body vibrates as a hum of laughter flows through him.

“All of this for Skull’s whore?” He chuckles. “She must have a magnificent pussy.”

I drop my elbow against his face, splitting the skin over his cheek bone. Blood pours from the thick gash, rolling along his sharp bone and dripping into his ear.

“How long?” I press the knife against his throat once more—harder, until blood pools along the edge of the blade. “Until Skull gets here? How long?”

He smiles—amused—despite the split in his cheek. “I’d say any minute now. You bring the other girl with you? Oh, Skull would love to see the girl.”

“Argh!” Pulling the knife back, I clench my fist around the handle and smash it into his face. His nose breaks under the force, but it’s not enough to stop me. I pull back and hit him again. And again. And again. Until the only sound he makes are the sounds of blood and bone as they are forced onto the tiles. I don’t know how long I hit him for…long enough to make his face resemble a dropped cherry pie. I pant, my arm feeling like it weighs a ton as I cock it back one last time. I let it fly and it drops pathetically, only to be caught midair by a strong hand around my bicep.

“Let’s go.” Joel orders, gripping my bicep, preventing me from demolishing the rest of this fucker’s face.

I whip my head up in Joel’s direction. His black eyes pleading with me. He’s finished? I’m just getting started.

“Skull will be here any minute.” I tell him, forcing myself to my feet.

I glance at my shaking hands and analyze the splattering of blood, following it up my arm. There’s a hunger inside me…a hunger to cause more pain—to draw more blood. I haven’t felt this way since I fought in the tunnels. It’s addicting—empowering—like cliff jumping into the freezing Atlantic.

“I’m not leaving.” I say with absolute finality.

Joel steps closer, worry etched into his face. “We didn’t come here for Skull.”

“You didn’t.” I yank my arm free. “I can kill him.”

Joel runs a hand over his head and through his hair. “Jai, please. Ted has been shot, I have Monique, and Emily is waiting for you. Don’t make me show up there without you.”

I blink as my heart beats, its pumping rhythm breaking down the anger in my veins.

“Emily is waiting for you.” He repeats, and the murderous fog clouding my brain disintegrates.

Emily is waiting for me.

I drop the knife and clench my hand as it trembles. I swallow, desperate to moisten my dry throat, but it only makes it worse. I glance around the foyer. The white walls are painted red with blood and drilled with bullet holes. Dead bodies are strewn across what I’m sure were once pristine tiles, their guns laying waste beside them. I glance back to Joel and a pair of scared, light violet eyes lock with mine as they peer over Joel’s shoulder.

“Is this your brother?” She asks, her voice beautifully light, like a song written in only high notes.

Joel steps out of the way and Monique inches forward. Joel wasn’t lying when he said she was young. She was seventeen when they met, making her nineteen now. She’s small—smaller than Emily, but slightly taller. She rakes her teeth over her plump lips while toying with her long, blonde hair that curls underneath her small breasts. She is everything I would have thought Joel wasn’t attracted to.

“This is Jai.” Joel says, keeping a firm grip on her wrist, his thumb rubbing at the skin underneath the yellow fabric of her jacket.

She offers me a small smile I don’t return. Now isn’t the time.

“Let’s go, Jai. We’ll get back to the car, go to the house and then get on a plane. It’s almost over. We’re on the home stretch.”

I look down at the lump of mush by my feet and it turns my stomach. Maybe I’ve done enough damage for today.

I pull my gun into my shoulder and lead the way out, entering and exiting the room I came through until I’m back outside. As I step out, a slither of black catches my left eye and I turn and shoot, hitting the fucker in the chest. He goes down and stays down.

“Nice shot.” Joel utters as he follows me out into the courtyard. “Ted?”

I look to where I left Ted and my stomach drops into my shoes. Why isn’t he moving?

“Ted?” I shout, jogging up to his lifeless body.

He doesn’t respond. He doesn’t even move.

No…no…no…no…no.

I drop to my knees and snatch my small torch from my belt. I grab his face and pry his eyelids open with my thick thumb. His pupils don’t dilate.

“Ted?” I demand again, tapping his cheeks. “Ted?”

Panic surges like a raging tsunami and I grab at him, slapping his face and shaking his shoulders. This isn’t happening. This isn’t how this was meant to go.

“His pulse, Jai. Check his pulse.”

I slip my trembling fingers against his neck. I wait. And wait.

“Jai…”

I shake my head. It’s not over. Not yet. I clench my jaw until it hurts the rest of my face. This isn’t how it ends for him. Not like this. Not here. Not with me.

I feel it then, tap gently against my fingers. His pulse. It’s there, but it’s faint. We need to get him out of here now.

“Grab him. Help me get him up.”

“He’s alive?”

I nod, grabbing Ted’s arm and wrapping it around my neck, hoisting him up and supporting him at dead weight.

“I’ll carry the bulk of him, you make sure you put pressure on his side. I don’t want him losing any more blood.”

Hesitating, Joel scratches his chin…until I look up at him. He better not deny me help. After everything he better fucking bow at my feet, begging to help.

Exhaling, he grabs Ted’s other arm and presses his hand against Ted’s side.

“Stay close to me, Niq. All right?”

Monique nods. “Okay.”

I move through the courtyard, struggling already with the extra weight on my back. The closer we get to the back of the compound, the darker it is. I don’t know how we’re going to make it back without one of us breaking our necks.

“This could be wasted effort, Jai.” Joel grunts, stepping over a big chunk of stone. “He could…he could die on the way.”

I’m a realist. I know Ted’s death is a possibility—almost a guarantee—but what kind of friend would I be if I just leave him here? If the worst happens and he passes on the way, then I want to make sure his mother gets his body.

“I know,” I groan, shifting Ted’s weight. “but I’m not leaving him here. He needs to be with family.”

Hate and disgust pick holes in my conscience. I shouldn’t have let him come. I should have made him stay at the lake house with Emily—or in the car at the very least. He shouldn’t have been down here helping me fight my battles. He spent his days directing traffic for God’s sake. How am I going to explain this to his mother?

Hold on, buddy. I squeeze him closer to me. We’ll get you patched up. All you gotta do is hold on.

Please hold on.

***

“We’re here.” Joel groan, his body close to giving out.

I grunt, forcing one leg in front of the other. My knee gives away and I stumble, pressing my hand into the dirt to stop myself from face planting. My muscles tremble and burn. Cramps linger, waiting to attack me the second I relax.

“Give him to me.” Joel says. “I’ll put him in the car.”

“Ted?” Huss calls as Joel shoulders Ted’s weight. “Shit.”

I straighten my spine, hissing as sharp bouts of pain shoot down my legs. Huss leaps from the car and slams the door shut.

“We need to get him to a hospital.” Monique says, hugging herself tightly.

Her hands covered in scratches and dry blood from the hike here. Mine too. I lost my gloves fifteen minutes in to entering the compound.

I pant, unbelievably relieved we made it back. Italy here we come.

Huss opens the back door. Lights flick on inside the car, revealing its emptiness. Joel hesitates for a second when he sees the empty back seat and glances sideways at Huss. I take a single step closer, then see the look on Huss's face. It has to be about Ted. Who else would it be about? Joel and Huss whisper as they gently slide Ted onto the empty back seat. I frown, confused, as Joel shuts the back door and turns his back to me, running his hands over his face.

My heart stops still as Huss turns to me, one of his hands stuffed into the pocket of his jeans, the other strapped in a cast and suspended by a sling against his chest.

“Where’s Emily?” I ask, trying to ignore the dread as it manifests inside of me.

“Jai…” Joel utters, rubbing the back of his neck. “Huss…Emily…”

He crouches low, hanging his head in his hands.

No.

Joel lifts his head, shaking it apologetically. I look to Huss for answers and all I get is a fucking stutter. I storm forward, the aches in my muscles no longer a prominent pain when pitted against the swell of my heart.

“Where is she?” I demand, closing the gap between us.

He backs up against the car, his palm exposed to me in surrender. “Jai. I—”

I lash out, punching Huss in the already swollen nose. Blood sprays his hood and covers my hand. I shove him against the car and hold him there.

“T-they took her.” He groans, squeezing his eyes shut.

My heart splits and I flinch. “Who took her?”

“Skulls men.”

I release him and clench at my chest, digging my fingers into the sharp, searing pain beneath my ribs. It’s not possible.

“How?” I whisper. “How’d they know?”

Realization dawns on me. I slowly turn around.

“Why didn’t they take you?”

He swallows, swiping at his busted nose. “They knew because I told them.”

“You f—” Growling, I whip around and slam my fist into his nose again.

Crying out in pain, he crashes to the ground. Anger, irrational and unavoidable, flares inside me. I advance on Huss, stopped only by Joel as he slips in front of me, planting his hands firmly on my chest.

“Jai. Come on. Hear him out.”

“I had no choice!” Huss shouts through his hands as he cradles his busted nose. “They threatened my son, Jai. My son.”

He’s never mentioned the fact he has a kid before. Why now? The first thing a parent does is boast about their child. Why would he keep that fact from us? Because he’s full of shit. He doesn’t have a son.

“Bullshit!” I growl over Joel’s shoulder. “You don’t have a kid!”

“I do! I do!” His lips tremble, stained with blood. “His name is Brandon. He’s seven—only seven. They knew where he lived, what school he went to, and the day him and his mother do their groceries. Jai, please. I-I couldn’t put my son in danger.”

“How’d they know where we’d be?” Joel asks. “We didn’t know until we were about to leave.”

He drops his chin to his chest. “I called them. Skull thinks by taking Emily, you three will come to him…so I gave him her. Like he asked.”

Whipping around, I yell, my shout ripping through the silent woods. Fuck! What the hell am I going to do? I leave her alone with Huss and this is what I fucking get? She’d have been safer with me in the damn compound. Go fucking figure!

I’m going back. I have to.

I storm around to the back of the car and pull open the trunk. I reach for a rifle and shut it.

“Jai, what are you doing?” Joel asks, walking over to me.

“I’m going back.”

“You can’t. Skull and his men have swarmed the place—you saw it. I don’t even know if Joker got out alive. It’s a suicide mission.”

“You don’t get to tell me what to do!” I shout, shoving him off me. “This is your fault! Yours! None of this would’ve happened if you hadn’t taken us to that damn bar! They wouldn’t have cornered Huss. They wouldn’t have had the chance to squeeze information out of him!”

He flinches, his brows pulling together.

“But it doesn’t matter anymore, right? You got what you wanted and I’m left to suffer…like always.”

“I didn’t intend for this to happen. This isn’t what I wanted for you…or for Emily.”

“We can help you get her back.” Monique cuts in.

I’d forgotten she was here. I turned toward her. Her determined, and slightly scared, little pout is almost laughable. She’s cute. Stupid, but cute.

“What can you do to help me? You’re just a child.”

She straightens her shoulders. “I’m nineteen…turning twenty soon.”

I roll my eyes. She’s not old enough to buy a beer, but she wants to help me fight a war? This isn’t fucking Xbox.

“Oh, that changes everything.” I narrow my eyes. “Why don’t you go and color in your coloring book and leave this to the adults.”

Her thin eyebrows pull together and she opens her mouth.

“Niq.” Joel cuts in. “Not now.”

She clamps her lips shut and turns away from us, her attitude thick in her stance. Joel takes the opportunity to pull the gun from my hands while I’m distracted bickering with his girlfriend. He points the gun at me, his finger firm on the trigger.

“You’re going to shoot me?”

“If it stops you from getting yourself killed.”

I lick my lips, shifting my weight on to my right leg. “Don’t do this, Joel. I can’t leave here without her.”

“Ted is dying. He needs a doctor. We have to deal with that first and then regroup.”

I shake my head, almost pleading. I knew this would happen. Deep down I know I knew. The old man practically warned me, but I didn’t listen. We were so concerned about me not making it back we didn’t even consider the possibility of her not being there when I did.

I have to do something.

I can’t leave her there.

“We’ll regroup.” Joel says, his voice low—unconvincing. “I promise.”

I drop my head, my chin almost touching my chest.

I tried so hard…how’d I fail her?

Kitty-Kat

Emily

Calloused fingers dance along my jaw and sweep the length of my neck before tapping along the rise of my breasts. I sigh, leaning into the touch. Why do I feel so terrible? Why does it feel like my brain is swelling against my skull? My eyes flutter open, revealing a thin layer of fog that obscures my vision. I close them again and they roll into the back of my head.

“Who hit her?”

That Australian accent. Involuntarily, I shudder at the strangely familiar voice.

Bang!

I jump as a gunshot rings out and liquid sprays against my bare feet. I blink as reality begins to set in. I shake my wrists and hear metal as it scrapes together. They’re suspended above my head. Groaning, I force my head up and blink some more. The bright spotlight above me burns my eyes so I squeeze them shut, letting my head fall.

More fingers caress me, switching from poking and prodding impatiently, to stroking me with utmost affection. Curiously, I blink some more, clearing away the Vaseline that has blocked my vision. I see his hand first...the tattooed bones and illegible letters. My hear sinks like a stone.

Stone. Jai?

My head flies up and I shoot forward, only to be caught by chains. No.

No, God. Please. No.

I shake my head, clearing away the last of my sleep. His tattooed mouth, the teeth, they curl into a devilish grin.

“Rise and shine.”

I shake my head as grief sets in, making me sob unashamedly. Tears fall from my eyes and land on my bare thighs, making clean circles in the dirt. Why am I naked?

He swipes his large, smooth hand from my eyebrow down to my chin and I close my eyes right before he snatches it in his fist and pulls my face forward. He holds me there for days—months, maybe. At least, that’s what it feels like. When I open my eyes, chills consume me and fear paralyzes me.

The skull tattoo. It’s as terrifying as I remember—even more so now I’ve done what I’ve done to him.

I’m a dead girl.

Skull chuckles, his smile stretching to his eyes. “You didn’t really think you could outrun me forever, did you, Kitty-Kat?”

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About The Author

Skyla Madi is an Australian writer from Brisbane, Queensland.

Skyla started her writing career fresh out of high school and at 21 she is a giver of both real and fictional life.

She is an aquarian, lover of the written word and author of the #1 BESTSELLING Consumed trilogy.

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Table of Contents

New York Crime Kings 1-4

Table of ContentsBlood & RustChapter OneChapter TwoChapter Three

Pronunciation Of The Name JaiJai=Jye
The First Mistake
The First Mistake
The Warehouse

The stranger’s warm hand wraps around my exposed elbow and he tugs me behind him. If my heart was ham...

Debt

The Underground

“Most of you know me,” a deep, baritone voice announces.

Trash

My cot bounces slightly and I jump as an unnoticed Jai dumps a heap of clothes onto the end of it. Pi...

Subversion
“I am.”
The Second Mistake

I force myself to clear my head and I close my eyes, hoping to pull my brain out of my vagina. I last...

Drinks

I don’t know exactly how long I walk around for. I mostly stick to the areas I know, too scared to ve...

Words

Shameless

In the next heartbeat, I feel him pressed into my back and the length of him settles between the chee...

The Pardon

“Stone. Three days and you’re up,” the man says before he tosses something heavy onto the ground.

Preparation

“Funny. You have the exact same attitude as my sixteen-year-old sister when she’s told to do things. ...

Round One

My attention flicks to the movement on the ledge above the cage. Seemingly bored, Skull leans on the ...

Expect the Unexpected
He frowns. “What does that mean?”
Indications

“Take off your shirt,” he drawls. “I need your collarbone.”

Confession

The KittenJaiPathetic.

The KittenJaiPathetic.

.

It carves its way through my bones, making sure it’s felt, and I hate it. Just thinking about her tum...

And I. Fucking. Hate
PainEmilyJesus!
Burns me.
GiftsJai
I angle my head. “I scare you?”
ConsolationEmily
AnxietyJai

Once she hit twenty-one, my parents gave up on her. They stopped lecturing her and started ignoring h...

InvasionEmily

His gaze drops to my lips and lightning shoots up my veins. I’m spellbound by the way his pupils have...

RedJai

“Nobody, huh?” Kitten teases, her smile widening as she tugs her arm free.

GreenEmily

His warm breath blows over my lips, warming my skin.

Give Me StrengthJai

She swallows hard. It makes me nervous—sick. A nasty bolt of nausea pins me right in the stomach. I n...

UniversalEmily
“Enjoy yourself?”
LiesJai

I turn my attention to them, unable to help an amused smirk. They can’t be older than twenty-one.

FreightEmily

“Skull wants to see you,” one of them says. I don’t know who.

Break FreeEmily
On The RunEmily
On The RunEmily

He drives fast—so fast I feel weightless, like an asteroid hurtling through space. The car doesn’t fe...

I look at Jai. His face is stern, his lips pressed into a thin line.

“We should run.” I mutter and he shakes his head.

Kitten’s PlaceJai

I don’t want to make her feel bad about where she lives, but come on. This isn’t a home. It’s a fucki...

The Lake HouseJaiHonnnnk!!

The floorboards creak underneath our feet, sending a shiver down my spine. Two white, wicker rocking ...

RecoveryJai
“What is it?” I pant. “What’s wrong?”
The DockEmily
“Jeez, I’m not that bad a kisser.”
Family FirstJai

“Are you sure? ‘Cause I kind of get the feeling it’ll be the end of the world if I get the wrong flav...

HimEmily

Those are the nicest five words I think I’ve ever heard in my life.

HerJaiFucking Kitten.

“Fuck, Kitten. That didn’t take long.”

UsJai

“It’d take a couple machines, numerous fertility treatments and probably a surgical procedure to get ...

Until Next TimeJai
NegativeEmily
InadequateJai

I rest my elbows on my knees and focus on the little black screen. The images are blurry. It looks li...

“In on what?”

She steps past me and pushes the door open before slipping from the shower. I stare at the fogged gla...

PreparationEmily
BangJai
Panting, Ted stops beside me. “Huss!”Nothing.
Joel StoneEmily

Next comes a sound that chills me to the bone. The sound of squeaky brakes and the gentle hum of an e...

Never EndingJaiBreakfast.
SufferingJai
SufferingJai

I hold the sponge in my hand, refusing to press it against her skin. “Emily?”

BrothersEmily
NeedJai
BeastlyEmily
Sweet SeventeenJai
“Jai?”

With nervous fingers, he toys with his lighter, flipping it over and over with his tips, reminding me...

TroubleEmily
“Emily?”
SlamJai
“This isn’t how you imagined what would go?”
FallenEmily
The Joker and the CrowJai
Exhaling, I sit his phone down next to him.

Joker grinds his teeth, the thick muscles in his jaw clenching tightly. His knuckles are white, his f...

InhaleEmily

FirstsJai

Sharp points of jealousy stab my stomach and fuel my panic.

SmoothJai

BangEmily

Doing as I’m told, I open the door. Jai hits the light in the center of the roof, preventing it from ...

“Emily...I’m sorry.”

PinnedJaiShit.

He drops his chin to his chest. “I called them. Skull thinks by taking Emily, you three will come to ...

Kitty-KatEmily
BEFORE YOU GO…DON’T MISS OUT!
About The AuthorSkyla Madi
Contact The Author